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Speaker 1: It fits in.

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Speaker 2: This is very, very exciting because next Monday night it's

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Speaker 2: back and we don't know. This is the thing a

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Speaker 2: lot of people. Is it going to be rammed up

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Speaker 2: like the last few seasons of Married at First Sight?

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Speaker 3: Well, anybody fall in love?

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Speaker 2: Will people find love? We do have a new specialist

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Speaker 2: on the show and her speciality is sex. She's a

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Speaker 2: sex ologist. Her name is Alessandro Rampala. She joins us now.

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Speaker 1: I said, we welcome, thank you, thank you so much,

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Speaker 1: nice to be here.

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Speaker 3: How did you end up in this job?

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Speaker 1: Isn't it amazing? I don't even I still ask myself

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Speaker 1: the same question. I was at the Emmy Awards in

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Speaker 1: New York a couple of years ago. I met an

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Speaker 1: executive from Meande Malsh, and we became friends and we've

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Speaker 1: been chatting. He's my only contact in Australia, the only

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Speaker 1: person I ever met. Yeah, he's and he's just heard

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Speaker 1: your addison.

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Speaker 4: He went, now because it is so sexy.

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Speaker 1: Thank you? No, no, no. He had seen the show

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Speaker 1: that we were nominated for and spoke to me about

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Speaker 1: my participation in that and we just became friends.

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Speaker 2: I was in Doctor Phil. You were on Doctor Phil.

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Speaker 1: I was Doctor Phield. But no, that wasn't the show

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Speaker 1: that we were nominated for. A show we did for Columbia.

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Speaker 1: Also School for Husbands for School for husbands. What's that like?

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Speaker 1: Terrible men? Terrible husbands? My wife send them to school?

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, we need that. Hold on and I

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Speaker 1: organized them and send.

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Speaker 3: Them back, like we can we take another step back,

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Speaker 3: it's become a sexologist. What exactly do you study?

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Speaker 1: Okay? In my case, I did a master's in marriage

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Speaker 1: and family therapy because I wanted to have My intention

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Speaker 1: was to do clinical sexology, which is what I studied.

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Speaker 1: So I did a master's in marriage and family therapy

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Speaker 1: and then did specific work in clinical sexology and as

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Speaker 1: a sexologist, basically, I am an expert in human sexual behavior.

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Speaker 1: And sexologists can do different types of work. They can

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Speaker 1: do clinical work. If they have like a psychology or

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Speaker 1: some kind of counseling background, we can do like how

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Speaker 1: do you say, Perito expert at court sure sexuality, we

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Speaker 1: can the sex educator. So it depends on the person

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Speaker 1: and their particular.

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Speaker 3: So if I had a mate who was, like, I

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Speaker 3: don't know, six foot six, he was forty three years

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Speaker 3: old and he's been married for a while and he's

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Speaker 3: kind of given up on the bedroom activity and his wife,

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Speaker 3: no doubt, is frustrated by this. You could help him out.

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Speaker 3: If I had that, mate.

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Speaker 1: We could totally help him out. So you do, are

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Speaker 1: you literally giving?

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Speaker 4: Like when you study, did you literally learn tips and

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Speaker 4: how them?

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Speaker 1: Oh? Yes, yes, yes, like how to have better orgasms,

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Speaker 1: how to prevent premature ejaculations.

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Speaker 4: Tell you about my friend who's a little bit overweight

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Speaker 4: and in his early forties and has trouble with both

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Speaker 4: those things.

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Speaker 3: I'm fine. I just thought maybe, yes, maybe could be

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Speaker 3: a word.

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Speaker 1: I did my studies with clinical sexology, but my career

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Speaker 1: has been basically in media. So what I ended up

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Speaker 1: doing most is sex education using just media platforms, whether

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Speaker 1: it be television or radio, or writing books or doing conferences.

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Speaker 1: And the most I do is I answer questions. People

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Speaker 1: are not used to having a credible source to just

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Speaker 1: go ask a question. And there's so many doubts surrounding

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Speaker 1: sexuality because we don't study it enough. We don't talk

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Speaker 1: about it openly in general conversation. I think as adults

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Speaker 1: we do a lot of double entundra. Yes, you know, joking,

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Speaker 1: but we don't necessarily really talk about our experiences and

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Speaker 1: not just great. I mean I left also, but then

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Speaker 1: there's times where you kind of really need to know

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Speaker 1: that you're not the only one going through X or

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Speaker 1: Y experience and talking about things and normalizing what's normal,

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Speaker 1: I think is very important.

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Speaker 3: What's the number one question you get asked?

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Speaker 1: Is it okay? Am I am I normal? Yeah? My normal?

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Speaker 1: Because I fantasize about tata da. It's a very dangerous word,

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Speaker 1: but I think people like to gauge themselves among the rest.

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Speaker 1: And because we don't talk about sex so openly and

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Speaker 1: what we really actually do, we don't really know if

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Speaker 1: what we're you know, into in bed is considered quote

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Speaker 1: unquote normal or such fear of judgment in terms of

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Speaker 1: our sexual likes, needs and expressions that I think it's

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Speaker 1: difficult for most people.

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Speaker 2: Can we So you your first impressions of Australian men

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Speaker 2: and women going going there is going to be on

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Speaker 2: a show called Merit at First Site, And we don't

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Speaker 2: we don't want you to round your basis around the

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Speaker 2: people that go on the show because Alessandra, I don't

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Speaker 2: know if you've seen previous seasons of married at First Site,

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Speaker 2: I've seen a couple we this country is fascinated by

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Speaker 2: the show.

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Speaker 1: We're not all like that, but we don't want to.

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Speaker 2: We don't want to be represented by these people because

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Speaker 2: there are some o they're mad, very confident people that

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Speaker 2: go on the show.

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Speaker 1: Yes, there's some. There's some very interesting characters that choose

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Speaker 1: to go through this experience. You know, it's interesting. Yes,

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Speaker 1: I think people that go on reality shows have to

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Speaker 1: have a very particular personality and kind of way of

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Speaker 1: being in order to allow for that much of themselves

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Speaker 1: to be exposed. So that alone just takes away I

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Speaker 1: think a lot of people from society that would not

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Speaker 1: be okay with that. But in general, what we're looking

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Speaker 1: at and Married at First Sight is just human behavior

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Speaker 1: and relationship.

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Speaker 4: So how do you literally your interaction with them? Are

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Speaker 4: you trying to teach two strangers how to be intimate?

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Speaker 1: Now, well, that's the thing what I've been doing with

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Speaker 1: my career, which is what I've been explaining, is one thing.

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Speaker 1: Then I come into Married at First Sight, and Married

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Speaker 1: at First Sight has already a very structured process in it.

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Speaker 1: It's a show that's already been on the air for here,

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Speaker 1: so I'm coming and finding my space here. What I

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Speaker 1: intend to do and married at first sight is open

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Speaker 1: up the conversation and just really make sure that the

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Speaker 1: component of sexuality and a long term relationship that these

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Speaker 1: people are trying to, you know, find love and build

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Speaker 1: long term that it really includes conscientiously the choice of

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Speaker 1: finding somebody with whom you're also sexually compatible with. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: use in real life, if you don't have good sexual compatibility,

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Speaker 1: it will not work.

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Speaker 2: Can I ask you will work? He's an honest question

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Speaker 2: now coming from a sexologist. Yes, do you think it's

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Speaker 2: the right thing to do? You've only met this person

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Speaker 2: on day one and you've married this person. Do you

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Speaker 2: think six should be a part of the wedding not

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Speaker 2: on day one?

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Speaker 1: I think that's not up to me to decide. And

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Speaker 1: what's really interesting is you'll see with the couples, especially

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Speaker 1: this one season that I've been a part of, that

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Speaker 1: I can you know, I can speak about the one

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Speaker 1: season I've participated in. We have some couples that jump

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Speaker 1: in bed right away, and we have some others that

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Speaker 1: really waited out a long time, even much to their

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Speaker 1: own sagrin, because sometimes they're made fun of by the

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Speaker 1: rest when they're not being intimate, so there is it's

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Speaker 1: almost like high school in TV. There's always like social

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Speaker 1: like fear pressure and are you doing it? Are you not?

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Speaker 1: What does it mean? Does it serve? Does it not?

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Speaker 1: For some couples, if that sexual spark is there, that

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Speaker 1: can help build right off the bat, and it's good

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Speaker 1: for them that works, And for others if they need

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Speaker 1: to feel more comfortable and build trust and just really

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Speaker 1: feel like they're ready, then that's also great. It's not

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Speaker 1: cool and you do anything that you're not really consciously choosing.

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Speaker 1: So there's this aspect that has to do with these

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Speaker 1: people are adults and it's no judgment. You can choose

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Speaker 1: what to do, but you better know what you're choosing

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Speaker 1: is right for you. And we find a lot of

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Speaker 1: disconnect between choices and what's actually really good for the time.

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Speaker 3: How many people do you think, as they get married

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Speaker 3: and they take out a sort of ten years of marriage,

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Speaker 3: just don't do it anymore. Do you think any common?

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Speaker 1: It's very common. I think it's many do it and

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Speaker 1: just don't enjoy it anymore.

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Speaker 3: They go to the potion becomes a job.

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Speaker 1: Because it becomes a job. Because I think people look

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Speaker 1: at if you look, even in media, the movies, you know,

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Speaker 1: it's all about the romans up until you get married,

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Speaker 1: and then the movie ends. Nobody tells you what happens

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Speaker 1: with the marriage. Yes, and in real life we don't

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Speaker 1: really even know how to integrate it where it's not

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Speaker 1: the expectation of the initial romantic love, but just really

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Speaker 1: be integrated in life as a way of self expression

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Speaker 1: and nourishment for the relationship. People stop working on relationships

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Speaker 1: once they find their partner, and once you find your partner,

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Speaker 1: that's when you're supposed to start working on a lifelong

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Speaker 1: work towards a good relationship. So I think the perspective

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Speaker 1: is having a couple.

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Speaker 2: Of having a couple of little people running around that

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Speaker 2: that doesn't slow it down.

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Speaker 1: Well, I think it depends on how you look at it.

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Speaker 1: You can also think that you know how the pandemic

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Speaker 1: has forced us all to reinvent ourselves and you know,

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Speaker 1: be very creative. I think little ones force you to

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Speaker 1: reinvent yourself sexually and be very creative. And sometimes what

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Speaker 1: I call planned spontaneity, like you plan your time alone

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Speaker 1: and then whatever happens there, it can be very spontaneous. Yes,

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Speaker 1: anything yeah, are you married? No, I'm the worst, right,

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Speaker 1: But role play for you?

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Speaker 2: What was something that you.

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Speaker 1: I don't talk about my sex life. This is an

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Speaker 1: interesting one because it I'm sorry, but.

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Speaker 2: People talk about this on Merredith First. The most awkward

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Speaker 2: thing that I find about on Merredith First. And I

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Speaker 2: feel like there have been contestants who have been bullied

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Speaker 2: over the years. Tell us about your sex long what

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Speaker 2: are you guys doing? I don't want to talk about it.

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Speaker 2: The guy that there was a guy on really every

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Speaker 2: episode the experts were saying to me, well, tell us

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Speaker 2: that were you're getting intimate? He said, well, I don't

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Speaker 2: want to talk about this. This poor guy was hounded

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Speaker 2: the whole time.

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Speaker 1: Different though, you're going into a reality show where you're

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Speaker 1: supposed to want to find love and marriage, and you're

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Speaker 1: going to have the instruction of experts. There will be

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Speaker 1: questions that are going to be asked. That's that participants

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Speaker 1: choice to be on the show or not. So it's

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Speaker 1: different in my case. The reason I don't talk about

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Speaker 1: my personal preferences. I am a public figure in like

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Speaker 1: many countries in the world, and I'm a public figure

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Speaker 1: because they speak about sex. I don't want people listening

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Speaker 1: to think that just because I like something, then that's

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Speaker 1: the thing to do. And I think there's a different

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Speaker 1: way to the information when it comes from the professional.

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Speaker 4: Do men find you intimidating?

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Speaker 1: Of course?

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Speaker 4: And do they make you?

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Speaker 3: I feel like you?

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Speaker 4: I feel like you would do a first date of what?

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Speaker 4: And if you ended up taking a man home or

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Speaker 4: going home and then that they would look to you and saide,

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Speaker 4: what do you like?

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Speaker 1: What I now?

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Speaker 3: Do I do this properly? Now?

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Speaker 1: Are you going to judge?

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Speaker 4: Am I going to get this wrong?

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Speaker 3: Well?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that doesn't really happen. I am actually pretty good

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Speaker 1: at sniffing out who's interested because I'm the sexologist, and

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Speaker 1: who's intimidated. And I don't like either. I don't like

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Speaker 1: a man who's going to feel uncomfortable or embarrassed or

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Speaker 1: shy doesn't have the confidence I need, and a man

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Speaker 1: who's only going to be like, oh, she's exciting to

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Speaker 1: be amazing and I'm Do you think I'm very normal?

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Speaker 3: Do you think one of the tickets to keeping the

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Speaker 3: relationship exciting in the bedroom is just talking about it? Yes?

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Speaker 1: And this conversation is so huge being able to talk

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Speaker 1: about it and knowing that you will find no judgment

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Speaker 1: from the other person. And that's the tricky part because

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Speaker 1: we tend to judge anything that we don't personally like.

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Speaker 1: We think, oh, that's you know, that's not good. But

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Speaker 1: it's our limits that oftentimes create that judgment, and people,

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Speaker 1: in my experience, for the most part, don't share with

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Speaker 1: their partner just because they're afraid of what they will think.

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Speaker 1: What is he or she going to think about me,

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Speaker 1: you know, saying that I might be interested in trying

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Speaker 1: this out, or I'm fantasizing on X, or you know

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Speaker 1: whatever it is that my fantasy is this week, or

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Speaker 1: maybe has been for the past thirty years.

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Speaker 3: Because Sarah's a never nude so she wears denim shorts

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Speaker 3: in the shower.

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Speaker 4: No, I don't like being nude. Okay, I don't like it.

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Speaker 4: It's not my thing. But it hasn't helped me back.

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Speaker 4: Let me like it.

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Speaker 1: I can see how you get very creatively get around

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Speaker 1: not being dude. Yeah, and have a really good time

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Speaker 1: at it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's right. We're really proud of it. She's come

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Speaker 3: such a long one.

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Speaker 2: So look, you can't tell us too much about this season,

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Speaker 2: but is there a.

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Speaker 3: Chance of love.

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Speaker 2: Yes, that there are a few contestants that really shock you, like,

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Speaker 2: are you amazed by some of the.

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Speaker 1: I'm not shot by much, to be quite honest, I

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Speaker 1: thought I just thought it was a really interesting mix

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Speaker 1: of people. There's some beautiful love stories. There's some there's

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Speaker 1: some stories where I was really frustrated and disappointed because

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Speaker 1: I thought for sure, and then it's like, oh no,

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Speaker 1: there's interesting drama just around the group. The group dynamic,

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Speaker 1: I think is such an important part of this experiment also,

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Speaker 1: and there's a lot of like inner drama within the Over.

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Speaker 2: The years, there's been wife swapping.

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Speaker 1: There's been some of that, yeah, among many many raunchy

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Speaker 1: things on this show.

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Speaker 2: Yes, so this season we say that as well.

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Speaker 1: There's interesting situations. I'm not I'm not going to go

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Speaker 1: into details because I do want to watch. I'm not

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Speaker 1: going to spill any spoilers, but it is a really

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Speaker 1: good season. There's love, there's drama, there's you know, emotion,

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Speaker 1: there's hope. There's some people that have come in just

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Speaker 1: I feel really genuine and willing to be vulnerable on camera,

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Speaker 1: which is not easy. So have you here?

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Speaker 2: We can't want nix my nautic keeps on Channel nine

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Speaker 2: and then so what you're are you hanging around for

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Speaker 2: the series or you're going back to Puerto Rico?

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Speaker 1: What are you crazy? I've been here six months and

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Speaker 1: I leave like the day after tomorrow.

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Speaker 4: You're so disappointed by man, I get it, just that fun,

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Speaker 4: get out of here.

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Speaker 1: It was six months. It was the people I observed

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Speaker 1: on the show. You guys, I Havessandra.

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Speaker 2: We really appreciate your time.

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Speaker 1: Thanks so much, Thank you great. It fits in whipp