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Speaker 1: Hi, friends, fans listeners of this podcast called Healthier, Well,

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Speaker 1: I hope you are fans. Thanks for tuning in to

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Speaker 1: yet another episode of Healthy your podcast and Body and Soul.

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Speaker 1: I'm your host of Felicity Haley and joining us well

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Speaker 1: on the other side of the screen today. Yes, we're

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Speaker 1: in our online studio is our digital editor Holly Berkleman,

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Speaker 1: and we are dissecting the three hottest topics in the

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Speaker 1: health and uness world this week. Holley, welcome back to

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Speaker 1: Healthy Shaw. Was your holiday in Japan?

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Speaker 2: Thank you flys. It was a fantastic holiday. We went

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Speaker 2: skiing in the Seco, which was amazing. It was like

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Speaker 2: the best no, I think I've ever seen. It was

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Speaker 2: a great season. Powder up to like your knees. It

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Speaker 2: was insane.

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Speaker 3: Sounds like a dream to me, like a dream.

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Speaker 2: My voice so sorry to all the listeners. I've got

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Speaker 2: a little bit of a cold, so I'm kind of

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Speaker 2: doing the husky thing today.

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Speaker 3: Look it sounds kind of sexy, but.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, thank you, That's what I'm going for now.

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Speaker 1: Well, what's been happening in the in Body and Soul

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Speaker 1: h Q. When you've been away?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I've been away, but we've jumped straight back into

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Speaker 2: some bab stories. So my pick for today is Chantelle Otten,

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Speaker 2: who's an amazing sex ologist. She's our new resident sexologist

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Speaker 2: at Body and Soul for twenty twenty five, which is

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Speaker 2: super exciting and one of her first columns, so her

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Speaker 2: second one was why intimacy is the missing ingredient in

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Speaker 2: the bedroom. I asked her to write this because in

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Speaker 2: our Body and Soul sex census last year, there was

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Speaker 2: some really interesting research that came out of it was

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Speaker 2: that intimacy was the number one thing Australians wanted more

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Speaker 2: of in the bedroom, more than stamina, more than crazy

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Speaker 2: positions or anything else, even more than more frequency. Is

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Speaker 2: that they wanted deeper connection and more intimacy, which I

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Speaker 2: found quite surprising. What do you think about that?

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Speaker 1: I yes, yes, surprising, but I mean, thank goodness, not

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Speaker 1: into the crazy sex positions that we feel like we

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Speaker 1: should be doing but perhaps no one's actually doing, and

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Speaker 1: that we're getting to the core of what it means

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Speaker 1: to connect as humans.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, I think it's quite moving actually, So

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Speaker 2: I was very keen to hear Chantelle's take on this,

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Speaker 2: and she says that she actually sees this all the

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Speaker 2: time in clinic as well when she's talking to couples

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Speaker 2: or individuals that many couples love each other and they

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Speaker 2: do have sex, but they feel like something is missing.

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Speaker 2: And part of that is because there are so many

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Speaker 2: different kinds of intimacy, She says, there's emotional, physical, sexual, intellectual,

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Speaker 2: and experiential, and missing even one kind can make your

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Speaker 2: sex life and relationship feel a bit off.

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Speaker 3: How do we get it? How do we increase it?

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Speaker 2: I don't boost intimacy in your relationship. She's got three

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Speaker 2: tips here, the first one being that intimacy starts outside

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Speaker 2: of the bedroom. So if you're feeling how disconnected when

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Speaker 2: you're having sex, it's probably not about the sex. It's

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Speaker 2: probably more about your wider relationship. So have a look

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Speaker 2: at how you're interacting throughout the day. Are you just

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Speaker 2: talking about bills, schedules, what's for dinner, et cetera, or

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Speaker 2: are you actually checking and having meaningful discussions.

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Speaker 1: I'd like to throw another one in there, if that's okay.

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Speaker 1: I think it is also involves getting off your phone.

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Speaker 2: Absolutely get off.

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Speaker 1: Putting it down and looking at the person and speaking

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Speaker 1: to them just saying.

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Speaker 2: I agree, And I think I've read something recently that was,

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Speaker 2: like meal times, you should always try and have meals

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Speaker 2: together and leave your phone elsewhere, because meals are such

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Speaker 2: a good time to like properly connect and kind of

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Speaker 2: foster that relationship. So the second one, she says, vulnerability

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Speaker 2: is sexy, and being vulnerable is hard, actually, but being

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Speaker 2: honest in your relationship is one of the most powerful tools.

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Speaker 2: So she says that instead of faking your enthusiasm for sex,

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Speaker 2: if it's not exciting you and it doesn't feel quite right,

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Speaker 2: then tribing real about what's getting in the way for you.

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Speaker 2: And that doesn't mean like being savage of me, like

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Speaker 2: I hate this, this sucks. It might just be like

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Speaker 2: I still feel a little uncomfortable about my body right now,

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Speaker 2: so I'm finding it hard to, you know, feel comfortable

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Speaker 2: having sex. Something like that. Don't use my words.

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Speaker 3: Carry we get the idea. Yeah, it's all right, you've

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Speaker 3: got it, Like.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, about one hour time difference. Perfect. Then the third

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Speaker 2: one she says is slow down. So if sex has

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Speaker 2: started feeling mechanical and like you're just going through the motions,

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Speaker 2: and hit the pause button and instead of rushing to

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Speaker 2: the main event, explore pleasure at a slower pace and

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Speaker 2: try and get back to basics a little bit. But

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Speaker 2: she says the bottom line is that if your sex

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Speaker 2: life feels off, it's not about the sex, it's about

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Speaker 2: the intimacy and it's really important to work on that.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I like this new narrative that we're taking it more around,

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Speaker 1: you know, rather than talking about sex so much and penetration,

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Speaker 1: we're talking more about intimacy and building the relationship up.

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Speaker 3: I like that one, Holly, thanks for.

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Speaker 2: Sharvy great and like your relationship might not feel off

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Speaker 2: because the sex is off. Yes, sex is off because

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Speaker 2: your relationship is off.

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Speaker 1: A good reminder to us all now.

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Speaker 3: Mine.

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Speaker 1: It's a bit of a downer after that one, but

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Speaker 1: I just had to share it because I was rather

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Speaker 1: alarmed to read this week that Australia has just been

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Speaker 1: confirmed as having one of the highest rates of breast

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Speaker 1: cancer in the world.

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Speaker 2: So it's so so grim.

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Speaker 1: Oh and especially when all these studies are coming out

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Speaker 1: around younger women in particular getting cancer. But let's just

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Speaker 1: focus on the high rates in Australia. So new research

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Speaker 1: from the University of Sydney, the University of Queensland and

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Speaker 1: Alberta Health Services in Canada analyzed global breast cancer incident

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Speaker 1: and death rates across one hundred and eighty five different countries,

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Speaker 1: and Australia and New Zealand were revealed to have the

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Speaker 1: highest rates of diagnosis in twenty twenty two, with wait

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Speaker 1: for this, one in seven women, one in seven and

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Speaker 1: one in five hundred and fifty men diagnosed with breast

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Speaker 1: cancer in their lifetime.

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Speaker 3: That is a lot that is so high, so high.

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Speaker 1: And interestingly, breast cancer diagnosises have increased by twenty four

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Speaker 1: percent in the past ten years, which so rates are

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Speaker 1: going up now death rates have dropped significantly. We actually

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Speaker 1: to counteract this. Australia has one of the lowest breast

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Speaker 1: cancer mortality rates in the world, so you know, our

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Speaker 1: chances of surviving the disease are really strong.

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Speaker 2: Many diagnoses, so many dinoses.

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Speaker 1: I also wonder, though one hundred and eighty five countries,

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Speaker 1: how many of those are in the developing world versus

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Speaker 1: the developed world. So I mean, I feel like perhaps

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Speaker 1: we could be more attuned to what cancer feels like

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Speaker 1: earlier on. I don't know, just just you know, putting

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Speaker 1: that out there, but I did. I want to raise

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Speaker 1: this because I think it's just a reminder to everyone

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Speaker 1: to know you or normal. So you take time to

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Speaker 1: get to know how your breasts look and feel in

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Speaker 1: different situations when you're showering, getting dressed, putting moisturizer on.

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Speaker 1: I mean, you don't need a special technique. Back in

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Speaker 1: my women's health days, there was a three finger technique

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Speaker 1: and feel around your breast. But you just need to

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Speaker 1: make to know what's right for you at different times

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Speaker 1: of the months as well, because you know, depends on

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Speaker 1: where you are in your cycle or if you impairy

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Speaker 1: or wherever, it can make a difference to how your

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Speaker 1: breast feels. So tonight, listeners, you know, feel your breast

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Speaker 1: under your arm up to your collar bone, all around.

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Speaker 2: Your breasts, and you know what, it might help even

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Speaker 2: to make notes or something like if you feel some

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Speaker 2: sort of breast can be lumpy, Yeah, if yours are,

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Speaker 2: maybe make a note of what you're feeling and then

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Speaker 2: you have something kind of like a line in the

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Speaker 2: sand to compare back with. Yeah, that's just what I do.

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Speaker 2: I like keeping notes of things like that because I

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Speaker 2: find it easier. That's impressive, yeah or crazy, but yeah,

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Speaker 2: I think make it part of your routine. And your schedule.

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Speaker 2: Remember we said late last year as part of a

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Speaker 2: story that it's good to put it as part of

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Speaker 2: your calendar. So maybe it's a week after your period,

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Speaker 2: every monthly habit of checking. But I agree that you

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Speaker 2: do need to check at different times of the month too.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, and it changes. I mean for me my breasts.

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Speaker 1: You know, as I've moving through life the different times

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Speaker 1: of the month that they might be a bit tender

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Speaker 1: versus not versus where I'm in my cycle. They do change.

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Speaker 1: But just know your normal. Okay, give us, well you

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Speaker 1: going to uplift us or warn us? Tell us give

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Speaker 1: us a quick rundown on most clicked story of the week.

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Speaker 2: Look, I'm not sure if it's uplifting or a warning.

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Speaker 2: I think it's quite funny, but I also think it's

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Speaker 2: probably good health advice. So this story was the one

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Speaker 2: thing you should never do when you pee, any thoughts fly.

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Speaker 1: No. I saw this headline and I have no idea.

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Speaker 2: My guess would be not to be on your phone

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Speaker 2: and the toilet I have also read is not great

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Speaker 2: for you. But this one is actually squatting over the

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Speaker 2: bowl rather than sitting down, which for jomophobes like me.

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Speaker 2: When you go out and about, you might not want

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Speaker 2: to sit on the toilet.

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Speaker 1: I always squat when I'm out and about. That might

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Speaker 1: be am I, but I do. I'm not sitting on

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Speaker 1: the toilet seat, and I'm trying my kids to do

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Speaker 1: the same.

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Speaker 2: Absolutely, And if I do have to sit on it,

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Speaker 2: you better believe there's like seventeen layers of toilet paper

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Speaker 2: on top of her.

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Speaker 3: Yep, yeah right.

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Speaker 2: According to doctor Carroll Figures, a professor at Duke University

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Speaker 2: School of Medicine, when you don't completely sit down, your

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Speaker 2: muscles are not completely relaxed. So in order for the

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Speaker 2: blood or to be completely empty, the pelvic floor muscles

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Speaker 2: have to be let go. So she says that an

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Speaker 2: individual's muscles are usually thirty to tens when squatting, meaning

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Speaker 2: a portion of your bladder contents will remain in there.

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Speaker 2: So why is that a problem. In the short term,

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Speaker 2: she says that carrying around old urine, which is an

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Speaker 2: absolutely foul term. But carrying around old urine places you

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Speaker 2: at a risk of accidental leak if you sneeze, laugh, jump,

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Speaker 2: or cough grim. That depends on your overall pelvic strength.

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Speaker 2: Pelvic floor strength too. Then the long term. She says

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Speaker 2: that old urine can cause irritation inside the bladder, leaving

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Speaker 2: you feeling like you need to urinate more often than

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Speaker 2: you usually would.

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Speaker 1: Wow, so use that. You know, in some public toilets

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Speaker 1: you actually get the liners that you can put on.

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Speaker 1: I need to reach for this more often. And also

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Speaker 1: when we talk about squatting, we're not talking about squatting

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Speaker 1: as you do in Asian countries.

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Speaker 3: So just over the seat, just over the seat.

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Speaker 2: Sit down, guys, popper down and sit down. Do your

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Speaker 2: bladder a favor.

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Speaker 1: Okay, helly, you know what, I'm just going to think

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Speaker 1: of you every time I go to a public tolet.

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Speaker 2: Now.

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Speaker 3: I know that sounds weird, but I can't squad anymore.

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Speaker 2: It's great for you.

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Speaker 1: Well, I hope you feel better soon. Welcome back from

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Speaker 1: Japan and we'll see you next week.

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Speaker 2: Thanks so much.

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Speaker 1: Have a great week everyone, And once again, if you

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Speaker 1: do want to read any of the above, I will

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Speaker 1: leave the.

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Speaker 3: Links in the show.

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Speaker 1: You know, you can DM me at Felicity Harley if

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Speaker 1: you would like. Well, if you have any questions or comments,

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Speaker 1: let me know or head online bodyansoul dot com dot

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Speaker 1: or you can of course Follow Body and Soul on Instagram, Facebook,

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Speaker 1: or TikTok. Grab our print edition, which is out in

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Speaker 1: your local Sunday paper. Thanks again for listening, and stay

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Speaker 1: Healthy is