WEBVTT - Mastering Your Mind, with Dr Adam Fraser 0:00:08.360 --> 0:00:11.119 Doctor Adam Freezer. Welcome to the podcast. 0:00:11.520 --> 0:00:14.440 It's very good to be here, mister Taylor. Actually, the 0:00:14.520 --> 0:00:16.520 last time I heard your name, I was in the 0:00:16.560 --> 0:00:21.720 Melbourne Conis Club and this announcement comes over and says, 0:00:22.079 --> 0:00:25.560 if Paul Taylor is in the lounge, could he please 0:00:25.680 --> 0:00:30.040 proceed to his flight. It's fully boarded and awaiting his arrival. 0:00:30.720 --> 0:00:33.800 And I stood up, going where is he? And I 0:00:34.000 --> 0:00:39.000 watch you just casually stroll out of the lounge, not 0:00:39.040 --> 0:00:45.000 a care in the world. I would have been sprinting that. 0:00:45.120 --> 0:00:51.000 You were like, yeah, man, you know you kind of 0:00:51.000 --> 0:00:52.080 wait till they call you name. 0:00:52.159 --> 0:00:54.720 Bro, I'll tell you. 0:00:54.800 --> 0:00:57.760 I'll tell you another story actually on that there was 0:00:57.800 --> 0:01:00.120 a mere to mine who was over from the UK 0:01:00.280 --> 0:01:03.520 for a while here, and we were driving to the 0:01:03.560 --> 0:01:07.760 airport and I was last minute dot com as you show, right, 0:01:08.400 --> 0:01:13.160 and we're still five minutes away from Melbourne Airport and 0:01:13.200 --> 0:01:16.800 it's half an hour before the flight, and Jesus is like, 0:01:17.319 --> 0:01:19.440 what are you doing to we just we just need 0:01:19.480 --> 0:01:21.920 to turn and go home, and I'm like, we're bye. 0:01:22.360 --> 0:01:24.800 So I pulled in. Luckily enough, I went into the 0:01:24.920 --> 0:01:26.039 valley parking, right. 0:01:26.800 --> 0:01:30.360 Straight up the stairs, straight through security. 0:01:30.280 --> 0:01:32.960 And just walked onto the flight before they actually called 0:01:33.040 --> 0:01:33.720 Arnim that time. 0:01:33.760 --> 0:01:37.320 He couldn't believe it because in the UK, yeah, exactly, 0:01:37.640 --> 0:01:41.039 tis you an R to get through security in the UK? 0:01:41.240 --> 0:01:46.520 Right, it's horrendous, But my listeners will not be surprised 0:01:46.560 --> 0:01:48.800 by that story. Thanks for throwing me under the bus, 0:01:48.920 --> 0:01:59.640 your bastard, So ma for the listeners. And you are 0:02:00.320 --> 0:02:04.560 you're a fellow speaker actually, so you have your PhD. 0:02:04.640 --> 0:02:10.040 I'm about to get my PhD, so I'm just about 0:02:10.080 --> 0:02:10.960 to submit it. 0:02:11.040 --> 0:02:13.520 But you've been you know, we're. 0:02:13.800 --> 0:02:16.519 Both professional speakers. You met on the speaking circuit. You've 0:02:16.560 --> 0:02:19.119 been doing it a bit longer than me. I've got 0:02:19.120 --> 0:02:21.880 one best selling book, you've got four best selling books. 0:02:22.160 --> 0:02:23.920 I've done a little bit of TV. You've done a 0:02:23.960 --> 0:02:26.280 lot of TV, right, So you're kind of a little 0:02:26.320 --> 0:02:29.240 bit like my big brother in the speaking circuit. 0:02:30.120 --> 0:02:33.760 But and actually one of those people. 0:02:34.080 --> 0:02:37.679 Who helps other speakers out right and talks to them about, hey, 0:02:37.720 --> 0:02:40.880 is there anything that I can do to help? And 0:02:40.960 --> 0:02:43.120 you know, we chat about content and those sorts of 0:02:43.120 --> 0:02:46.760 things rather than the speakers who are you know very 0:02:46.840 --> 0:02:49.919 much like hold on to all their own stuff for 0:02:50.520 --> 0:02:54.000 steal your stuff for those sorts of people pride and 0:02:54.400 --> 0:02:55.040 one thing. 0:02:55.200 --> 0:02:57.359 Where I win saw you at the Happiness in Its 0:02:57.400 --> 0:03:02.720 Causes conference a while ago, and you only had like 0:03:02.760 --> 0:03:05.800 twenty minutes and you came out and slayed like you 0:03:05.880 --> 0:03:09.160 were the best session of the day. And we have 0:03:09.480 --> 0:03:11.800 very very different styles. But at one point you were 0:03:11.840 --> 0:03:14.360 talking about like a lot of similar stuff to what 0:03:14.480 --> 0:03:18.480 I talk about in terms of, you know, the content 0:03:18.560 --> 0:03:22.560 and the focus, but it was just it was so different, 0:03:22.960 --> 0:03:24.920 like the average person wouldn't have picked it up, but 0:03:25.000 --> 0:03:27.160 it was just like there are some rule we have 0:03:27.240 --> 0:03:31.560 some really good parallels in some of the work that 0:03:31.600 --> 0:03:34.560 we do, and very similar beliefs, you know, and certainly 0:03:34.560 --> 0:03:37.840 our attitude towards research and science is very aligned. 0:03:39.040 --> 0:03:39.560 Yeah. 0:03:39.600 --> 0:03:45.120 Absolutely, Look, tell us I tell the listeners about your PhD, right, 0:03:45.120 --> 0:03:48.120 because it's in a pretty interesting area that then has 0:03:48.240 --> 0:03:50.960 sort of spawned what you talk about to Yeah. 0:03:51.000 --> 0:03:54.560 Yeah, So I my undergraduate was biomedical science, which is 0:03:54.560 --> 0:03:59.200 a blend of psychology and physiology. And one thing I 0:03:59.240 --> 0:04:00.640 was trying to work out I was going to do 0:04:00.760 --> 0:04:03.440 and I was going to go down the psychology path, 0:04:03.640 --> 0:04:06.640 and then they told me how many hours of counseling 0:04:06.720 --> 0:04:09.400 I had to do. And I was like, oh, screw that. 0:04:09.600 --> 0:04:11.960 I'm not sitting in a room listening to people's problems 0:04:12.000 --> 0:04:14.680 for that long. So I went down the sort of 0:04:14.720 --> 0:04:19.560 research arm and my PhD looked at and this is 0:04:19.880 --> 0:04:22.120 far out. Oh god, I kin't of remember. This is 0:04:22.240 --> 0:04:28.279 early two thousands, how our lifestyle factors affected a group 0:04:28.360 --> 0:04:33.839 of unhealthy middle aged men. But we measured from quality 0:04:33.839 --> 0:04:41.560 of life, happiness, cellular function, insolent sensitivity, you know, like strength, 0:04:41.680 --> 0:04:44.760 all this stuff. So what we were looking at is 0:04:44.839 --> 0:04:48.400 just if we change someone's lifestyle, what gets better? So 0:04:48.520 --> 0:04:52.280 that was and the whole thing is we were looking 0:04:52.640 --> 0:04:57.560 at both resistance training and aerobic training, as well as nutrition. 0:04:58.920 --> 0:05:01.719 But yeah, the HD was kind of ahead of its time, 0:05:02.360 --> 0:05:06.120 like not through any design but just through luck and 0:05:06.200 --> 0:05:09.039 if and what we showed is a dramatic increase in 0:05:09.120 --> 0:05:12.479 happiness through exercise. But it was like the first study 0:05:12.520 --> 0:05:14.800 to show that. And if I had a had that, 0:05:15.200 --> 0:05:18.359 if I had had the foresight, like I'd be world 0:05:18.400 --> 0:05:21.919 famous today if because other people sort of picked that 0:05:22.000 --> 0:05:24.440 up and ran with it, but I just I didn't. 0:05:24.760 --> 0:05:26.560 I didn't recognize it at the time. But yeah, it 0:05:26.600 --> 0:05:28.320 was a good PhD. I'm in it put me in 0:05:28.400 --> 0:05:30.479 therapy and I kind of had a breakdown after it, 0:05:30.560 --> 0:05:33.080 but other than that, it was fine. Yeah, have you 0:05:33.160 --> 0:05:33.919 scheduled yours? 0:05:35.320 --> 0:05:36.039 You got kids, you. 0:05:36.080 --> 0:05:36.960 Don't have time for that. 0:05:38.200 --> 0:05:41.760 No, No, exactly, that's right, that's right. I'm hopefully going 0:05:41.800 --> 0:05:43.279 to submit at the end of the week. 0:05:43.320 --> 0:05:47.840 Actually, that's a massive achievement, Like, congratulations, the fact that 0:05:47.880 --> 0:05:52.720 you rundlessness, you're doing all that, you're raising kids, you're 0:05:52.720 --> 0:05:56.360 swearing at people on stage like you're amazing. 0:05:58.240 --> 0:05:58.400 Yeah. 0:05:58.480 --> 0:06:01.239 Man, there's one thing submitted and there's another one getting 0:06:01.279 --> 0:06:03.800 it actually approved by the external examiner. 0:06:04.000 --> 0:06:05.599 So let's just watched this. 0:06:06.279 --> 0:06:11.080 But actually, interestingly, it's in a very similar area to yours. 0:06:11.360 --> 0:06:16.279 It's it's a psychophysiological approach to cognitive fitness, which is 0:06:16.320 --> 0:06:17.760 kind of performance on depression. 0:06:17.920 --> 0:06:24.160 Right, Yes, I mean I want to talk to you 0:06:24.240 --> 0:06:26.800 about your PhD, but you just supposed to ask the 0:06:26.880 --> 0:06:27.760 questions the other way. 0:06:28.279 --> 0:06:32.040 But yeah, look, I'm sure we I'm sure we will 0:06:32.080 --> 0:06:37.560 back and forth. And word is really I mean, obviously 0:06:37.560 --> 0:06:42.839 your PhD spawneded, but were there any other moments along 0:06:42.880 --> 0:06:46.440 the way, just from you being a speaker that that 0:06:46.800 --> 0:06:53.280 really brought home that strong interaction between physiology and psychology, right. 0:06:53.320 --> 0:06:56.719 I think we're both big believers in this two way 0:06:56.760 --> 0:06:59.320 interaction between physiology and psychology. 0:07:00.120 --> 0:07:03.440 Yeah, and probably people listening to this won't realize how 0:07:03.480 --> 0:07:06.960 separate those two worlds were up till recently. And you know, 0:07:07.680 --> 0:07:12.520 podcasts like yours and researchers like you really understand that. 0:07:12.640 --> 0:07:15.600 But for many years, particularly when I went through my undergraduate, 0:07:15.680 --> 0:07:19.480 we treated those two things as totally separate and they 0:07:19.520 --> 0:07:23.520 never really affected each other. But I mean, it is 0:07:23.560 --> 0:07:27.400 so critical and and so much of the just the 0:07:27.520 --> 0:07:33.760 basic physiology around sleep around you know, fatigue management, recovery, 0:07:33.840 --> 0:07:36.000 all those things, you just can't get away from them 0:07:36.000 --> 0:07:40.000 because they're just the absolute bedrock that everything else is 0:07:40.040 --> 0:07:42.920 built on. Like you talk about ability to handle pressure, 0:07:43.520 --> 0:07:48.360 capacity to think about leaders My gosh, that's a tough job. 0:07:48.920 --> 0:07:52.640 And just having that really strong base of physiology that 0:07:52.760 --> 0:07:58.480 allows you to respond in a constructive, healthy way is 0:07:58.520 --> 0:08:00.400 so critical. And I look at you know, one of 0:08:00.440 --> 0:08:02.960 the pieces of work that we both do that's very 0:08:03.000 --> 0:08:07.400 similar is the stuff around act or psychological flexibility, and 0:08:07.440 --> 0:08:12.920 that requires huge levels of self awareness and cognition, and 0:08:13.080 --> 0:08:14.640 you just can't do that if you're not in a 0:08:14.680 --> 0:08:17.480 good physical space. So yeah, those two worlds I see 0:08:17.520 --> 0:08:20.520 are just so so linked. 0:08:22.800 --> 0:08:26.320 Yeah, absolutely, I mean we talk, we currently talk about 0:08:26.320 --> 0:08:30.880 the fundamentals, like if you want to be a sustainable 0:08:30.920 --> 0:08:33.600 peak performer, and I think that's the key word, right, 0:08:33.640 --> 0:08:36.440 because there's a lot of business. 0:08:36.200 --> 0:08:38.400 Leaders out there who are. 0:08:38.679 --> 0:08:43.320 Peak performers, but they're headed towards Bonotte pretty quickly. And 0:08:43.360 --> 0:08:45.439 you have seen them and I've seen them. But if 0:08:45.440 --> 0:08:48.640 you want to be sustainable, you've got to get your 0:08:48.679 --> 0:08:54.439 foundations right of exercise, of sleep, of good nutrition, hydration, 0:08:54.800 --> 0:08:55.360 you're all. 0:08:55.280 --> 0:08:56.720 That recovery stuff. 0:08:56.840 --> 0:09:00.160 Because if you don't have that basis, how can can 0:09:00.200 --> 0:09:03.640 you expect your brilland to work well in a sustainable 0:09:03.679 --> 0:09:05.600 manner without it's just imploding. 0:09:05.720 --> 0:09:08.600 Yeah, And like I mean, you asked me before as 0:09:08.640 --> 0:09:10.880 a speaker, do you see things? I was in Broken 0:09:10.960 --> 0:09:13.320 Hill doing some work out there, and there was a 0:09:13.400 --> 0:09:17.440 leader like stuff had really hit the fan, and there 0:09:17.520 --> 0:09:19.880 was a leader who had to take on so much 0:09:20.720 --> 0:09:22.800 and she was just out of a mind. Even trying 0:09:22.800 --> 0:09:24.600 to have a conversation with her. She was just all 0:09:24.640 --> 0:09:27.319 over the place. And I never kind of pull people 0:09:27.360 --> 0:09:30.080 aside and go, oh, I want to give you some advice, 0:09:30.200 --> 0:09:33.679 like you don't want to be that guy. But I 0:09:33.760 --> 0:09:36.320 said to her, Hey, after this session, I need to 0:09:36.320 --> 0:09:38.160 have a serious talk to you. And I just went, hey, 0:09:38.200 --> 0:09:40.880 I'm really worried about you because I just don't think 0:09:40.920 --> 0:09:43.040 you can keep this up. And here's what I'm seeing. 0:09:43.520 --> 0:09:45.160 And she was kind of like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I 0:09:45.240 --> 0:09:46.719 know what you're saying, but I just got to get 0:09:46.720 --> 0:09:49.959 through this period. And then you know what I found 0:09:49.960 --> 0:09:52.680 is she had a complete breakdown and end up in hospital, 0:09:53.320 --> 0:09:57.720 like she just imploded one day, and yeah, it was 0:09:59.440 --> 0:10:01.840 you could see it coming them all away. So that 0:10:01.960 --> 0:10:06.240 basic stuff around recovery and all those habits that we 0:10:06.280 --> 0:10:10.080 know we should have are just truly foundational. 0:10:11.760 --> 0:10:15.760 So let's talk about practical stuff, right. 0:10:16.000 --> 0:10:20.920 So before we even get to that recovery and all 0:10:21.000 --> 0:10:26.400 those foundations, it's really about when someone goes home from 0:10:26.520 --> 0:10:29.040 work that's shifting over. 0:10:29.280 --> 0:10:31.400 And you've written a brilliant, award winning. 0:10:31.160 --> 0:10:35.120 Book called the Third Space, so it's a concept that's 0:10:35.160 --> 0:10:39.720 resonated with pretty much everybody who's read it. Explain to 0:10:39.960 --> 0:10:42.680 us what the third space is, and you know how 0:10:42.720 --> 0:10:45.199 you came up with it and why you think it's 0:10:45.920 --> 0:10:52.280 critical for sustainable peak performance. And just and actually for 0:10:52.440 --> 0:10:54.839 most people just to be surviving in today's world. 0:10:54.920 --> 0:10:57.800 Yeah, and really it kind of as most of the 0:10:57.800 --> 0:10:59.439 stuff I come up with, I came up with a 0:10:59.480 --> 0:11:01.679 by accident. So we were doing a lot of work 0:11:01.760 --> 0:11:05.040 with the military. When I was at university, we had 0:11:05.240 --> 0:11:09.240 only one of a few climate chambers, so we could 0:11:09.280 --> 0:11:12.320 do some stuff with the military where it's forty degrees, 0:11:12.320 --> 0:11:14.480 it's one hundred percent humidity, they've got to run on 0:11:14.480 --> 0:11:17.880 a treadmill like. So the military loved us, and I 0:11:17.920 --> 0:11:20.599 was just hanging out with these people and chatting. And 0:11:20.640 --> 0:11:23.120 I had a couple of mates that were in the ESAs, 0:11:23.160 --> 0:11:26.440 and one thing I would ask them is what's the 0:11:26.440 --> 0:11:30.400 hardest part about being a soldier or you know, in 0:11:30.440 --> 0:11:33.600 special forces? And all of them said coming home is 0:11:33.640 --> 0:11:37.960 the hardest part. And just what they talked about is how, 0:11:38.480 --> 0:11:40.439 you know, for the first two weeks they'd just fight 0:11:40.520 --> 0:11:44.320 with their family before they were kind of acclimatized. And 0:11:44.360 --> 0:11:46.959 it just really made me think about that transition. And then, 0:11:47.280 --> 0:11:49.319 you know, I had an interaction with a CEO who 0:11:49.400 --> 0:11:53.440 talked about how he literally built a new entrance into 0:11:53.480 --> 0:11:57.040 his home so he would go into his room, shower, 0:11:57.160 --> 0:11:59.480 get changed and then go down and see the family. 0:12:00.320 --> 0:12:04.200 And then I spoke to an expert in high performance 0:12:04.240 --> 0:12:07.319 tennis players and he talked about the transition between points 0:12:07.640 --> 0:12:11.280 being the most important. So what just kept coming up 0:12:11.400 --> 0:12:14.240 is how we move from one thing to the next 0:12:14.760 --> 0:12:18.520 is vitally important, like the physiology we bring, the mindset 0:12:18.600 --> 0:12:22.840 we bring, and I just kept seeing it everywhere. So 0:12:23.280 --> 0:12:25.760 for people listening to this kind of the first space 0:12:25.840 --> 0:12:28.840 is what you're doing now, second space what you're about 0:12:28.840 --> 0:12:31.560 to do, and the third space is that transitional gap. 0:12:32.280 --> 0:12:34.839 And what we just look at is, well, is that 0:12:34.960 --> 0:12:37.840 gap critical? And what we found with high performers is 0:12:37.880 --> 0:12:41.440 it's vital. So what we do in that gap to 0:12:41.679 --> 0:12:45.280 leave what we've just done behind, but most importantly get 0:12:45.320 --> 0:12:47.600 our mindset right for what we're about to go into. 0:12:48.040 --> 0:12:51.080 So whether it's one meeting to the next or you know, 0:12:51.520 --> 0:12:55.560 I'm sure you do it. Like before I walk on stage, 0:12:55.679 --> 0:12:57.560 I need that third space to get my head in 0:12:57.600 --> 0:13:00.200 the game and to get really focused. So I have 0:13:00.240 --> 0:13:02.640 a process that I go through. But even like I'm 0:13:02.679 --> 0:13:06.200 talking to you now, which is awesome and fun, and 0:13:06.280 --> 0:13:08.079 I don't get to see you very often, so it's 0:13:08.120 --> 0:13:10.320 really good. But in a minute. I've got to go 0:13:10.400 --> 0:13:14.959 home to two teenage tortoise. Man. That is not fun 0:13:15.000 --> 0:13:20.120 and not enjoyable, and I'm in the trenches man. Oh 0:13:20.360 --> 0:13:21.960 so I've got to go home and I've got to 0:13:21.960 --> 0:13:24.280 be empathetic and I've got to be caring and they're 0:13:24.280 --> 0:13:26.920 probably going to be giving me a bit of attitude. 0:13:26.960 --> 0:13:29.360 So it's almost like I've got to prepare myself for 0:13:29.480 --> 0:13:33.920 that next environment. So that's what this concept of the 0:13:33.960 --> 0:13:38.200 third space is about. And whether it's the most popular application, 0:13:38.440 --> 0:13:42.040 is that transition from work to home, whether we're working 0:13:42.080 --> 0:13:47.320 at our desk, spare room, commuting, just how do we 0:13:47.360 --> 0:13:52.560 shift gears between the work mentality and the home mentality 0:13:52.559 --> 0:13:54.800 and too often we bring the day home with this 0:13:55.160 --> 0:13:56.800 and it's been a bad day and we take it 0:13:56.800 --> 0:13:59.680 out on the people that we live with. So yeah, 0:13:59.800 --> 0:14:02.719 that's what that concept looks at. Whether it's a transition 0:14:02.800 --> 0:14:06.319 between a meeting or you know, it's a big transition 0:14:06.480 --> 0:14:09.199 like a different environment. That's that's what the concepts are. 0:14:10.559 --> 0:14:14.800 And then I has COVID shifted that right and that 0:14:15.480 --> 0:14:20.440 increase working from home because you can see how there 0:14:20.480 --> 0:14:24.040 would be there would be one number one a clear 0:14:24.240 --> 0:14:28.000 stimulus when you're coming home. That's kind of like, okay, 0:14:28.000 --> 0:14:32.000 this is a reminder. Now I'm shifting in and you're 0:14:32.080 --> 0:14:35.680 going from one environment to the other, Like how is 0:14:35.720 --> 0:14:38.720 that different from walking out from the home office into 0:14:38.760 --> 0:14:41.600 the living room, And often the home office is a 0:14:41.680 --> 0:14:42.880 corner of the living room. 0:14:43.640 --> 0:14:47.200 I got more emails about this concept during COVID than 0:14:47.240 --> 0:14:51.000 I ever have, and what people just sent me emails going, man, 0:14:51.200 --> 0:14:56.280 I've had to apply this concept because when I mean, 0:14:56.280 --> 0:14:58.920 we did a lot of research during COVID, and the 0:14:59.000 --> 0:15:02.760 thing we is people said I missed my commute. Like 0:15:02.800 --> 0:15:05.280 no one said I missed the physicality of it, like 0:15:05.400 --> 0:15:07.960 I miss sitting in traffic, or I don't miss being 0:15:08.000 --> 0:15:10.600 pressed up against a sweaty guy in a train. But 0:15:10.720 --> 0:15:15.000 what I miss is was like a punctuation mark. It 0:15:15.040 --> 0:15:18.840 was a symbol of you know, I'm moving between two 0:15:18.920 --> 0:15:21.920 different worlds. But now that so many people work in 0:15:21.960 --> 0:15:24.440 the home, what we found is when we work from home, 0:15:24.520 --> 0:15:28.400 we work longer, longer, It is far far harder to 0:15:28.480 --> 0:15:33.160 turn off. And what happens is we tend to work 0:15:33.320 --> 0:15:38.160 into our personal time, either physically or mentally, like we're 0:15:38.200 --> 0:15:41.680 still in that mode. So what people said, like, even 0:15:41.720 --> 0:15:44.840 one guy just went oh, during COVID, I would get 0:15:45.280 --> 0:15:47.560 I would get dressed for work. I would get in 0:15:47.600 --> 0:15:51.000 the car, I'd go to a coffee shop, get the coffee, 0:15:51.360 --> 0:15:53.320 drive back home, and when I walked in the house, 0:15:53.320 --> 0:15:56.080 I went, right, I'm at work. At the end of 0:15:56.120 --> 0:15:59.720 the day, I would leave, like I put on gym 0:15:59.760 --> 0:16:02.080 gear and I'd go to a local park and walk 0:16:02.120 --> 0:16:05.200 around the park. And then when I came home, it's like, right, 0:16:05.240 --> 0:16:07.960 I'm a mom, I'm a dad, I'm a partner parent, whatever. 0:16:08.480 --> 0:16:11.600 And even one guy, an executive I know from a bank, 0:16:12.320 --> 0:16:14.760 he rang me and said, oh, man, you wouldn't believe it. 0:16:14.800 --> 0:16:18.960 We tried that, you know, homeschooling, and he said that 0:16:19.160 --> 0:16:22.000 was some sort of cruel and unusual punishment. It was 0:16:22.080 --> 0:16:24.960 just chaos. We're yelling at the kids, they're yelling at us. 0:16:25.480 --> 0:16:28.560 And he said, I reminded me of that concept, and 0:16:28.600 --> 0:16:32.640 he said the next week, I literally got dressed for work, 0:16:32.720 --> 0:16:35.000 made the kids put their school uniforms on, and we 0:16:35.040 --> 0:16:38.120 walked around the block, came in the house and it's like, kids, 0:16:38.200 --> 0:16:41.480 you're at school, do your lessons? Where at work? And 0:16:41.520 --> 0:16:43.200 then at the end of the day, they would get 0:16:43.280 --> 0:16:45.480 dressed out of their clothes and just go for a 0:16:45.520 --> 0:16:47.800 little walk, then come back in and we're a family. 0:16:48.560 --> 0:16:52.160 And he just talked about even just drawing those marks 0:16:52.880 --> 0:16:56.720 in the day did so much to help our behavior 0:16:56.760 --> 0:17:00.800 in our mindset. So yeah, COVID really that's led to 0:17:00.880 --> 0:17:01.920 a resurgence of this. 0:17:03.400 --> 0:17:06.600 Yeah, I like to at the end of the working day, 0:17:06.680 --> 0:17:10.080 if I'm working from home, or if I've been out 0:17:10.160 --> 0:17:12.560 and I come back in, the first thing I do 0:17:12.680 --> 0:17:15.280 is I get changed into my exercise gear because for. 0:17:15.240 --> 0:17:16.320 Me two reasons. 0:17:16.400 --> 0:17:19.639 Number one, it's a it's a shift from work to 0:17:19.760 --> 0:17:24.480 home environment, but it also is a subconscious trigger to 0:17:24.720 --> 0:17:27.000 move more. Right, because lots of people come home and 0:17:27.040 --> 0:17:31.520 they get into their bloody pajamas and full line. Yeah, 0:17:31.520 --> 0:17:34.440 the prime the priming is sit on your arse and 0:17:35.000 --> 0:17:38.080 grab a bottle of wine. Right, So, what are one 0:17:38.160 --> 0:17:42.840 or two things that that people can do to make 0:17:42.920 --> 0:17:45.600 that transition better. I mean, you you've talked about a 0:17:45.640 --> 0:17:47.600 few things that some people might go, Fuck, I'm not 0:17:47.640 --> 0:17:49.520 gonna go out and go round the block. 0:17:49.320 --> 0:17:49.960 But whatever. 0:17:50.000 --> 0:17:53.719 But what are a couple of simple techniques that people 0:17:53.760 --> 0:17:57.879 can actually use to harness this third space so that 0:17:57.920 --> 0:17:59.960 they're not bringing work into their person. 0:18:00.200 --> 0:18:02.120 Yeah, I mean, look what we found is a good 0:18:02.200 --> 0:18:05.240 transition from work to home. Have three elements to it, 0:18:05.800 --> 0:18:09.879 so reflect, rest, reset. So the reflect piece is just 0:18:10.480 --> 0:18:14.040 shut the day down, so just reflect on it. But 0:18:14.280 --> 0:18:17.359 also if you can reflect on the good parts of 0:18:17.400 --> 0:18:21.679 the day. So how I do it is as I 0:18:21.720 --> 0:18:23.880 start to walk to my car to drive home, I'll 0:18:23.880 --> 0:18:26.520 think about the day, had a couple of great meetings. 0:18:26.840 --> 0:18:29.080 You know, I'm going to reflect on the conversation with you. 0:18:29.200 --> 0:18:31.800 What could I have done better? What was good about it? 0:18:31.840 --> 0:18:34.760 So just kind of shut the day down, but in 0:18:34.800 --> 0:18:38.480 a constructive not oh that was shit and screwed that up. 0:18:39.200 --> 0:18:41.600 So then the next phase is rest, which is just 0:18:41.680 --> 0:18:45.560 do anything that focuses your mind on one thing. So 0:18:45.720 --> 0:18:48.879 you could do deep breathing, you could do listen to 0:18:48.960 --> 0:18:51.680 a podcast, like I'm gonna I've only got a short drive, 0:18:51.720 --> 0:18:55.240 so I'll just crank some music and you know, just 0:18:55.560 --> 0:18:59.359 enjoy the music as I drive home. So that's rest, 0:18:59.440 --> 0:19:02.600 and then re set is literally you're going to almost 0:19:02.720 --> 0:19:05.640 visualize like you're an athlete. So when I walked through 0:19:05.640 --> 0:19:08.720 that door, what kind of husband do I want to be? 0:19:08.840 --> 0:19:10.679 What kind of dad do I want to be. So 0:19:10.760 --> 0:19:13.879 if I'm met with attitude from my daughters, how do 0:19:13.920 --> 0:19:16.800 I be compassionate? Or how do I be playful and 0:19:16.920 --> 0:19:20.920 sort of diffuse it with humor. It's thinking about well, 0:19:21.480 --> 0:19:23.800 what do I want to achieve in that environment? So 0:19:23.960 --> 0:19:29.359 that reflectress reset is the perfect transition. But the whole 0:19:29.359 --> 0:19:32.240 thing about this concept is super portable. Like we were 0:19:32.240 --> 0:19:34.880 working with paramedics. Man, have you ever done any work 0:19:34.920 --> 0:19:35.240 with them? 0:19:36.680 --> 0:19:38.200 I am yeah. 0:19:38.200 --> 0:19:41.879 I actually did some basic paramedic training when I was 0:19:41.880 --> 0:19:44.960 doing helicopter search and rescue, so we had to be 0:19:45.040 --> 0:19:48.399 and in my role, we were semi triann paramedic and 0:19:48.880 --> 0:19:49.600 we had the span. 0:19:49.800 --> 0:19:51.480 We did four weeks training. 0:19:51.160 --> 0:19:54.800 And part of that was being in the guys with 0:19:54.240 --> 0:19:59.440 the ambulance drivers, a tough kid. 0:20:00.240 --> 0:20:04.159 What we did is we taught them this strategy, but 0:20:04.240 --> 0:20:07.240 we weren't arrogant enough to go and here's how you're 0:20:07.280 --> 0:20:10.480 going to implement it. We just taught them the principles 0:20:10.480 --> 0:20:12.280 and then we said, all right, in a couple of months, 0:20:12.280 --> 0:20:14.000 we're going to come back to you, and what we 0:20:14.080 --> 0:20:16.719 need is how have you used at what worked, what 0:20:16.760 --> 0:20:20.000 didn't work? And there's a rural group who got together 0:20:20.160 --> 0:20:25.080 after the presentation. And one thing they talked about is 0:20:25.760 --> 0:20:28.119 they will go home after a shift. They're still in 0:20:28.160 --> 0:20:30.880 their clothes and they might be running late and they've 0:20:30.880 --> 0:20:32.960 got to take a kid to footy training. And they're 0:20:33.000 --> 0:20:36.280 standing on the sideline at footy training in their paramedics 0:20:36.280 --> 0:20:38.639 outfit and people come up and go, oh, what happened 0:20:38.640 --> 0:20:40.840 with that accident the other day or what's going on 0:20:41.280 --> 0:20:43.919 and they're still talking about work. And they came up 0:20:43.960 --> 0:20:47.400 with a campaign called get out of the Green. Now 0:20:47.440 --> 0:20:51.320 their uniform's green. And they said there's two steps. It's 0:20:51.400 --> 0:20:53.879 kind of like what you do. You leave your boots 0:20:53.920 --> 0:20:56.679 at the door, like the boots don't come in, and 0:20:56.720 --> 0:20:58.480 the first thing you do is go to your room 0:20:58.520 --> 0:21:00.880 and you peel that day off, like you take off 0:21:00.920 --> 0:21:04.959 the identity. And they said it's a symbolistic thing, but 0:21:05.000 --> 0:21:09.239 it's also a mindset shift. So you can really do 0:21:10.119 --> 0:21:13.920 you can really do anything that works for you. I mean, 0:21:13.960 --> 0:21:16.280 people listening to this take it, play around with it. 0:21:16.320 --> 0:21:18.639 Like one things my wife and I will do is 0:21:18.680 --> 0:21:22.200 go for a walk and then when we come back, 0:21:22.320 --> 0:21:26.080 that's like parenting time, you know, time with the kids. 0:21:26.320 --> 0:21:30.080 But even like as I go to home, one of 0:21:30.119 --> 0:21:32.560 the things I focus on and it might sound negative, 0:21:32.560 --> 0:21:34.960 but it works really well is when I walk in 0:21:35.000 --> 0:21:36.800 the door, I just think how many more years have 0:21:36.840 --> 0:21:41.400 I got with my girls, like teen and twelve, and 0:21:41.520 --> 0:21:45.720 it has flowing and I just go, Man, don't be 0:21:45.800 --> 0:21:50.960 a douchebag, like just enjoy it for even the crappy parts. 0:21:51.040 --> 0:21:55.040 Still just get into it, be present, really try and 0:21:55.040 --> 0:21:56.720 make the most of it because it's going to go 0:21:56.800 --> 0:21:59.400 within a blink of an eye. So really you can 0:21:59.480 --> 0:22:02.000 just use any think that fits into that that gets 0:22:02.000 --> 0:22:02.720 a better outcome. 0:22:04.040 --> 0:22:04.240 Yeah. 0:22:04.520 --> 0:22:07.600 But I love the idea of reflect, rest, and reset 0:22:07.680 --> 0:22:12.000 and people can can play within those things and that 0:22:12.359 --> 0:22:17.720 you know, you then talked about transitioning and visualizing who 0:22:17.760 --> 0:22:18.520 you want to be. 0:22:19.920 --> 0:22:21.320