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Speaker 1: Cookie alps. What's going on?

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Speaker 2: You haven't mentioned my new headphones?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, what is going on? What? Let me hang on?

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Speaker 1: Let me put on my specs because I I just

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Speaker 1: realized you don't have the big buffers over there? What

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Speaker 1: are they? They look like you look like you're a uh,

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Speaker 1: one of those people who take orders at a fast

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Speaker 1: food outlet. I was just thinking, how do I say this?

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna no, they look kind of fancy though. What

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Speaker 1: are they?

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Speaker 2: They're just little ones that will go over your ears.

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Speaker 2: They're just hear. But it's weird because I'm used to

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Speaker 2: having the noise canceling ones. So there's this whole sensory

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Speaker 2: circus going on inside my head right now.

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Speaker 1: See I might do better with those. I might do

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Speaker 1: better with those. What so just describe to people. So

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Speaker 1: normally Tiff wears the big buff headphones, as do I sometimes,

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Speaker 1: but really.

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Speaker 2: Quite comfort ones that muff over both of your ears,

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Speaker 2: that's the usual get up. I bought these ones because

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Speaker 2: I liked the idea of well, I was thinking about

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Speaker 2: playing with the virtual background, which normally annoys me because

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Speaker 2: the gaps in between your head and the headphones cut.

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Speaker 2: The picture cuts in and out. Just like your hand

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Speaker 2: is right now as you move the microphone that can't

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Speaker 2: be seen. You know, it's weird. So I thought I'd

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Speaker 2: get these and just have a crack and also, all right,

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Speaker 2: they just look better, but also they're just so they're

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Speaker 2: buds that hook over my ear because I wanted the

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Speaker 2: wire is everyone's still here with us listening. I wanted

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Speaker 2: the wire to not be hanging in the front of

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Speaker 2: my face, and so the ears it has to hook

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Speaker 2: over your ear and then the wire has to come

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Speaker 2: out of the back bit of the hook, not the front,

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Speaker 2: not the bar.

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Speaker 1: What make they? A'm googling them? This is terrible podcasting?

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Speaker 1: That fuck? What's new?

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Speaker 2: They were? What are they? A Ventry Resolve They're really

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Speaker 2: they just bought them. They're really cheap ones. They like

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Speaker 2: thirty spell a Vanry A the A n t r

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Speaker 2: ee Resolve open ear earphones, a.

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Speaker 1: Van Try Resolve open ear wired open earbuds. Is that then,

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Speaker 1: oh that's the ones twenty six bucks.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and so they just sit and they don't block

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Speaker 2: your ears. So like the bone conducting ones that you've

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Speaker 2: seen me wear at the gym and told me I

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Speaker 2: looked like the call taker.

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Speaker 1: These me a pair, and I'll just give you the

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Speaker 1: cash because I'm shit at buying things online. Sure, sure

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Speaker 1: you can even put a bit of markup on it?

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Speaker 1: What did you you can go? Ah? That was thirty five?

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Speaker 1: What can I say?

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Speaker 2: Plus postage in handling.

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Speaker 1: If anyone else wants a pair, just email TIFFs, She'll

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Speaker 1: get them.

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Speaker 2: Can I tell you a funny story about them getting delivered?

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Speaker 2: So I got them delivered and I went downstairs and

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Speaker 2: there were two parcels from and I ripped them open.

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Speaker 2: And last week i'd been looking up someone was talking

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Speaker 2: about the book by Robin Sharma. I think as this meditation,

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Speaker 2: this Buddhist monk book. Anyway, I'd looked it up, I'd

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Speaker 2: googled it. And I ripped open the package and the

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Speaker 2: book has arrived, and I'm like, oh, oh, I must

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Speaker 2: have ordered it. I can't remember ordering the book. I

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Speaker 2: must have orded a book because I googled him last week.

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Speaker 2: And then this morning, as I was leaving the apartment block,

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Speaker 2: there's a big sign on the window and I was like,

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Speaker 2: what was I saying? It's got says warning. The picture

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Speaker 2: of two parcels is like people are coming down the

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Speaker 2: driveway and stealing our parcels. My Amazon parcel got stolen,

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Speaker 2: and then I rushed upstairs and looked at the package

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Speaker 2: that I hadn't read and it wasn't my book.

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Speaker 1: You fucking thief. So you're the.

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Speaker 2: Can you believe that it's a book that I? And

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Speaker 2: I was like just assumed I'd bought it. So I

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Speaker 2: had to write a little love letter and say, hey,

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Speaker 2: Apartment six, sorry I accidentally flogged your book, but here's

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Speaker 2: a bird story.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. So have you connected with them? Have you spoken

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Speaker 1: to them?

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Speaker 2: No, it's currently this was just this morning, and it's

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Speaker 2: when I got home just before. It's still leaning against

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Speaker 2: her door, or so she'll she'll come home.

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Speaker 1: And what are the chances that you and her would

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Speaker 1: order the same book?

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Speaker 2: Well? I didn't order the book, but because I've been

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Speaker 2: having a bit of a field day on online shopping lately,

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Speaker 2: because when you're in the dumps, what else do you do?

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Speaker 2: There's been stuff just rocking up left, right and center.

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Speaker 1: What's the biggest bullshit you've ever bought? I've never bought

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Speaker 1: anything online, which is partly because I'm old. Actually that's

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Speaker 1: the whole reason. Actually, that's all of it. I was

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Speaker 1: trying to think of another reason. I'm old, what's the

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Speaker 1: dumbest shit? It's probably something you bought with Patrick. Was

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Speaker 1: it that.

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Speaker 2: Sonic toothbrush? But here's another one of sitting right here.

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Speaker 2: But I've only got part of it. I was looking

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Speaker 2: at the heated gloves you can buy. I'm like, I

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Speaker 2: get some of these, and.

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Speaker 1: Are you talking about for your motorbike or just general

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Speaker 1: getting about.

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Speaker 2: Originally I was looking for the motorbike, but then I

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Speaker 2: saw it could get thin ones right, so the us

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Speaker 2: B charged and then your hands stay warm. I thought

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Speaker 2: these would be great in the gym, and then I

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Speaker 2: found some for like thirty bucks. I thought, this is great,

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Speaker 2: there's a way cheap bucuse that one's one hundred bucks.

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Speaker 2: They rock up and they're just fingerless knitted gloves. And

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Speaker 2: if you look here that I'll describe to the audience.

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Speaker 2: There's just two and they have to be plugged into work,

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Speaker 2: so they're not USB chargeable. They just charge when you're

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Speaker 2: at your computer. And there's just this square thing that

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Speaker 2: sit that you stick velkrows to the inside of this

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Speaker 2: stupid knitted glove. And I was like, I totally got jibbed.

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Speaker 2: That is not what you portrayed this product to be online.

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Speaker 1: You totally did get jibbed. Okay, So what's the best

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Speaker 1: thing you've ever like, you know, where some and under

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Speaker 1: promises and over deliver and you unwrapped it and you went, fuck,

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Speaker 1: this is awesome, or maybe it just met your expectations.

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Speaker 1: By the way, how often do you buy something online?

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Speaker 2: I just go through little stages, you know. Sometimes I'm

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Speaker 2: just laying in better in the morning and next minute

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Speaker 2: Facebook churns out a bit of rubbish. You're like, oh,

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Speaker 2: what's that. I've bought a lot of pit toys like

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Speaker 2: that little cat, little cat doos? I did you see

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Speaker 2: your cat having so much fun? And you're like, oh that,

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Speaker 2: look at all that fun. Love that. So she gets

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Speaker 2: a lot of toys like that.

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Speaker 1: You could give bear an empty milk cart and then

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Speaker 1: she'd have a great time for two days.

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Speaker 2: She normally loves the box that things come in more

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Speaker 2: than the toys.

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Speaker 1: Exactly, exactly, like a two year old. Yeah, all right,

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Speaker 1: you still, we've got to get on with our show

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Speaker 1: because I actually have a topic but or something I

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Speaker 1: want to discuss. What's the best thing that you've got

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Speaker 1: online that didn't disappoint well?

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Speaker 2: I don't know.

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Speaker 1: Really, Well, they've got they've got to be up. There

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Speaker 1: is a good sound those headphones.

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Speaker 2: Well, well it's weird because I can hear my voice now,

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Speaker 2: whereas before I'm used. I'm just used to it, so

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Speaker 2: they're good. But I'm just used to the noise canceling

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Speaker 2: headphones covering your whole ear. So now I can hear

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Speaker 2: my voice not just feeding back through the headphones, but

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Speaker 2: also leaking into my normal ear. It's weird.

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Speaker 1: So you can hear yourself both through your ears like

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Speaker 1: just normally in the room noise, and also through the

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Speaker 1: actual headphones themselves.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, it always throws me. It's a bit like

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Speaker 2: when you get microphone to speak and I'm used to,

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Speaker 2: like I said to you at events, and I'm used

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Speaker 2: to hearing through the headphones my voice, and then all

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Speaker 2: of a sudden You've got to gauge how loud is this?

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Speaker 2: Am I? Is the microphone working? Am I too loud?

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Speaker 1: I don't know why I'm resistant headphones because I did

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Speaker 1: radio for twenty years with headphones, and then as soon

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Speaker 1: as I realized I could do podcasts without them, disbanding them. Hey, so,

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Speaker 1: how by the way, why do you look so good today, Like,

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Speaker 1: have you had a date or something this morning?

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Speaker 2: Thanks? No, Actually, I've just got a normal item of

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Speaker 2: clothing on. It's not a muscletop or a gym top.

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Speaker 2: That's the difference.

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Speaker 1: No, that's not true, because you have faces all different.

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Speaker 1: You look like you've been made up.

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Speaker 2: No, same as the same as normal, but none. Eight

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Speaker 2: blue eyeline and our same true story.

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Speaker 1: Thanks you look maybe it's because you don't have your

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Speaker 1: doubts and your biceps hanging out like a.

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Speaker 2: Dude and my big headphones.

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Speaker 1: I what month is your birthday?

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Speaker 2: It's May? May, the first May day, May Day? Here

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Speaker 2: she comes.

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Speaker 1: That's right, So you turned forty one just last May, right,

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Speaker 1: a couple of months ago. Yeah, okay, So here's what

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Speaker 1: I want to tell you, and this is our stepping

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Speaker 1: off point for our conversation today. You are statistic forty one.

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Speaker 1: So May is the fifth month, eleventh. So in November,

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Speaker 1: let's be more accurate. In November, you are going to

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Speaker 1: be statistically at the halfway mark of your life. Statistically,

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Speaker 1: because the average AUSSI female lives to eighty three now,

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Speaker 1: and we know that also statistically, the last five to

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Speaker 1: ten years might be shited. Do you think about where

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Speaker 1: you are ever in the context of your life span?

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Speaker 1: The reason for this is actually I'll shut up. Do

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Speaker 1: you think about that?

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Speaker 2: Maybe not as a linear what percentage of the way through?

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Speaker 2: Am I? I remember looking at one of those calendars

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Speaker 2: once before where you put the dots with dots on

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Speaker 2: each day and it's got what I can't remember what

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Speaker 2: that's called. Is that a stoic calendar?

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Speaker 1: Not sure?

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Speaker 2: I feel like it's something to do with stoicism, but

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Speaker 2: I but I do think about life and progress and

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Speaker 2: where I'm at, maybe kind of with my goals and

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Speaker 2: financially and lifestyle, and do what is this? Is this

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Speaker 2: version of life? The version of life that I want

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Speaker 2: when I'm fifty or when I'm sixty and beyond. I

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Speaker 2: think of all that, probably overthink of all that really.

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Speaker 1: So I had a conversation the other day with a lady.

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Speaker 1: Her name's Lil Sorry, Lil litl sixty four? Also sorry.

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Speaker 2: Sorry she's sixty four or sorry, no, I'm sorry.

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Speaker 1: I don't think she'll well, too late, too late now,

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Speaker 1: I don't think she'll mind. But I've known her for

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Speaker 1: a long time. I've known her for maybe thirty years.

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Speaker 1: She used to be a client back in the days

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Speaker 1: when I was training people, and then she went and

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Speaker 1: got qualified as a trainer herself, then started to train

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Speaker 1: and pad or still trains people. Does a great job,

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Speaker 1: got a great business, all that, But there's some stuff

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Speaker 1: that she, like all of us, me, me included, she

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Speaker 1: needs to address and change. And you know, she's been

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Speaker 1: back and forwards with stuff and making decisions and doing

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Speaker 1: stuff then undoing it and making them and unmaking them,

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Speaker 1: and anyway, we're talking about this whole kind of you know,

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Speaker 1: like when do we get really fucking serious about that thing?

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Speaker 1: And do we ever get really serious? And like what

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Speaker 1: has to happen for us to make a decision that

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Speaker 1: we don't unmake, you know? And why do we simultaneously

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Speaker 1: know that we shouldn't do that thing because it's bad

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Speaker 1: for our health, our mind, our lifestyle, our sleep or whatever.

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Speaker 1: But we do it. We consciously choose to do that.

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Speaker 1: I'm not talking about you who's fit, lean, strong, and

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Speaker 1: it's a bit of chocolate. I'm talking about people who,

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Speaker 1: you know, like, for a range of reasons, kind of

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Speaker 1: do stuff which is quite detrimental to their physical, mental,

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Speaker 1: and emotional health. No judgment in here, just curiosity. And

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Speaker 1: what was interesting was we're talking about this and like

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Speaker 1: I said, sixty four so statistically she's got nineteen years

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Speaker 1: to go. Now. I know this sounds morbid, but I

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Speaker 1: think sometimes this is going to sound maybe even counterintuitive,

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Speaker 1: but I think sometimes the way to get the most

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Speaker 1: out of life is to think about death. In that,

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Speaker 1: I said, and I got out the salt shakers and

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Speaker 1: the sugar which were on the table. We're at the Hamptons,

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Speaker 1: we're chatting, doing a coaching session, and so I put

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Speaker 1: one salt shaker and I went, this was when you

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Speaker 1: were born. This is and then you know, kind of

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Speaker 1: quite a way across the table, this is where we

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Speaker 1: are now, and then not far from there, where she's

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Speaker 1: going to be. And when you look at it as

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Speaker 1: a line and you go, here's sixty four years and

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Speaker 1: here's the nineteen years you've got left. And she went

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Speaker 1: and because there was almost well not almost, because there

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Speaker 1: was this like visual representation, it really fucked with her

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Speaker 1: head a little bit. Well that's really depressing, I go, Well, not,

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Speaker 1: I go, it just is what it is. I said.

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Speaker 1: Even if I'm let's say I'm normal, I'm typical. Who

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Speaker 1: knows I could live longer or shorter. I'm not sure.

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Speaker 1: But if I am typical, I'm seventy five percent through

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Speaker 1: my life, because for dudes, it's about eighty and I'm sixty.

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Speaker 1: So that's not being morbid, that's not being negative or pessimistic,

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Speaker 1: that's just going in fact, if anything, it makes me

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Speaker 1: want to do more, think better, create better. How do

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Speaker 1: I optimize me if I've only got twenty years left,

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Speaker 1: which I hope I have more, But if I've only

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Speaker 1: got twenty years, how do I make those fucking great?

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Speaker 1: You know? And I think the having a kind of

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Speaker 1: an awareness of your mortality without being morbid, you know,

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Speaker 1: without being sad or negative. You know, I think it

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Speaker 1: can actually help us embrace the now and the living,

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Speaker 1: you know, like we're every single one of us, every

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Speaker 1: day is getting older. You know. It's like I Googled

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Speaker 1: this morning. I'm not googled. I just before I chat

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Speaker 1: GPT because I couldn't be bothered doing the numbers, including

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Speaker 1: leap years and shit. And from when I was born

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Speaker 1: my date of birth until today is twenty two thousand,

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Speaker 1: two hundred days today, like twenty two thousand, two hundred

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Speaker 1: so if we figure that out as like, well, that's

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Speaker 1: three quarters of my journey, then I've got maybe seven

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Speaker 1: thousand and a bit more days, right, And you go,

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Speaker 1: oh fuck. Then all of a sudden, you're like, because

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Speaker 1: that doesn't seem like that many. You know, it's a few,

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Speaker 1: but you know, and I just think that having that

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Speaker 1: context out, you know, thinking about health span, thinking about lifespan,

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Speaker 1: thinking about what I might do whatever age I am at,

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Speaker 1: whether I'm forty one like you, or sixty like me,

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Speaker 1: or sixty four like lil like between now and when

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Speaker 1: I leave this mortal coil, as Mary Harper calls it,

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Speaker 1: when I go home to the big fella, As Mary says,

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Speaker 1: I don't know if there is a home or a

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Speaker 1: big fellow, but let's just cross our fingers, our etherorial fingers,

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Speaker 1: and like, what what can I do to make the

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Speaker 1: next whatever it is, five ten, twenty, thirty, forty years

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Speaker 1: better than it might have been if I just continue

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Speaker 1: on my current trajectory? You know, do you ever think

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Speaker 1: about all that stuff?

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Speaker 2: Oh? Heaps? And you know what, even lately I've been

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Speaker 2: very reflective on right, because also understanding what our values

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Speaker 2: are and what relationship we have with our circumstances is very,

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Speaker 2: very challenging and difficult moment to moment because it evolves,

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Speaker 2: but we hold on to what was once our current

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Speaker 2: way of thinking. So we learn something about ourselves, we

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Speaker 2: learn how we understand something and relate to it, and

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Speaker 2: then we hold that and then we live life and

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Speaker 2: it evolves on us, sometimes without taking our conscious mind

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Speaker 2: with it. So this week especially, I've been thinking about

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Speaker 2: because you know, we talked last time about my body's

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Speaker 2: not responding to things, you know, like I'm having it.

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Speaker 2: I'm having a lot of physical, mental, and emotional ebbs

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Speaker 2: and flows lately, and it's hard, and training is hard,

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Speaker 2: and I'm like, Okay, what do we need And to

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Speaker 2: step away from the intensity of boxing and training the

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Speaker 2: way I love to train that makes me feel better,

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Speaker 2: just to surrender to that and take up some yoga

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Speaker 2: for a while. I've had to actually also reflect on,

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Speaker 2: hang on, what's your attachment to these things and changing

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Speaker 2: it for now. It doesn't mean changing it forever, but

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Speaker 2: your resistance to it maybe means that you've you've come

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Speaker 2: back to an unhealthy attachment or an identity with it

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Speaker 2: and the way I identify.

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Speaker 1: Hmmm, Wow, that's interesting. Yeah, I was thinking, if my

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Speaker 1: life is a one foot ruler, I'm three inches from

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Speaker 1: the end. Oh, that's fucking scary, isn't it.

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Speaker 2: It is? And also the idea that that's that's kind

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Speaker 2: of best case scenario.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: And also with every day that passes, the ability for life,

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Speaker 2: quality of life, yes, is statistically going to be lower.

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Speaker 2: So to make the assumptions that I'll just do all

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Speaker 2: this work and then I'll and then at this point

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Speaker 2: I'll go and live, bask and whatever. The book that

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Speaker 2: I love, I think I've mentioned it before, and it's

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Speaker 2: not exactly this topic, but it's philosophies are the same.

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Speaker 2: It's called Die with Zero, and it talks about money

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Speaker 2: and finances.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 2: It talks about how to live life, creating memories not

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Speaker 2: material things and understand it's actually I think it's a

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Speaker 2: really great book. And even on this topic finances aside,

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Speaker 2: I think it gets your mind relating to life a

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Speaker 2: little bit differently.

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Speaker 1: Hmmm. That is well, that is quite a philosophical and

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Speaker 1: almost spiritual kind of perspective to take, and I like it.

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Speaker 1: Will you think about and I know with this as

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Speaker 1: old ground, but you know, we're all I won't say all,

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Speaker 1: but most of us listening to this event taught and

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Speaker 1: told and trained that success is about things. You know

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Speaker 1: that as you and I were talking about before, when

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Speaker 1: I was talking to you about the upcoming works of

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Speaker 1: workshops that I'm doing, we're talking about the background and that.

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Speaker 1: But like we're taught that success is about what you

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Speaker 1: have and what you earn and what you own. And

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Speaker 1: you know, what you look like and where you live

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Speaker 1: and your money and you and how many people kind

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Speaker 1: of have ticked a lot of those boxes and in

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Speaker 1: the middle of it, and you experienced this last week

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Speaker 1: where you were just having a shit week and nothing

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Speaker 1: shit was going on. Yeah, and you know, I've lately,

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Speaker 1: I've had a couple of not shit days. But I've

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Speaker 1: said to you and I don't you know, nothing not

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Speaker 1: depression or but just like, sometimes the way I feel

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Speaker 1: is not reflective of what's going on in my life

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Speaker 1: because for the most part, my life is somewhere between

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Speaker 1: good and fucking great, you know, but we're all human

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Speaker 1: and normal. And then you like, how many people do

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Speaker 1: we know as they go through their life and they

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Speaker 1: have in that backdrop of thinking that is successes. And

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Speaker 1: I'll be successful when I'll be happy, when I'll be

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Speaker 1: fulfilled when and then they get there, or they get

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Speaker 1: a version of there, or they get to the top

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Speaker 1: of the mountain, as we've spoken about a bit lately,

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Speaker 1: and they're like, oh, fuck, I'm on the wrong mountain.

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Speaker 1: It's over there.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. It's having an awareness on a deeper meaning. And

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Speaker 2: I remember reflecting on a friend of mine as opposed

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Speaker 2: to mine. Is the way I am with savings and

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Speaker 2: money and financial security and her way and with polar opposites,

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Speaker 2: you know. But she has had experience after experience, and

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Speaker 2: she has traveled extensively and always has the means to

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Speaker 2: do that, but doesn't have the financial security. And part

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Speaker 2: of me envies that of her, but he is very

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Speaker 2: aware that I could do that. But something inside of

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Speaker 2: me that probably needs a whole lot of unpacking and

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Speaker 2: work just cannot allow me to to live. I have

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Speaker 2: this thing, and I think it's security, abandonment, loss. There's

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Speaker 2: some deep stuff that goes on inside me that probably

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Speaker 2: needs unpacking, Goddess to know where to start, but it

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Speaker 2: prevents me from surrendering to a way of life will

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Speaker 2: probably be more rewarding at times.

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Speaker 1: Wow, that is very brave of you to say that,

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Speaker 1: very very self aware. Like I think when there's a

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Speaker 1: thing that we think we maybe should do or could do,

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Speaker 1: or might be a better version of our current existence,

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Speaker 1: and we don't do it, and we consciously don't do it,

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Speaker 1: you know, it's because, Yeah, that's surrendering. I love that,

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Speaker 1: But it's a fear thing. It's like, what's the fear.

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Speaker 1: Fear is I guess that life will be worse, that

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Speaker 1: you'll be a kind of vulnerable. That's bad, you know,

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Speaker 1: and it is it's all well and good to talk about.

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Speaker 1: Like it's easy to talk about this stuff, isn't it. Vulnerability?

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Speaker 1: You know, surrendering and like living your best life and

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Speaker 1: you know, serving others and having a purpose bigger than

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Speaker 1: you and all of these things that we talk about

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Speaker 1: a lot. And I believe all of those things, and

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Speaker 1: I teach those things, and half the time I'm all

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Speaker 1: of it, and half the time I'm the opposite, you know.

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Speaker 1: It's like half the time I'm a fucking idiot, And

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Speaker 1: I'm like, I know that this stuff is true, that

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Speaker 1: I can be so selfish in the moment or even

401
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Speaker 1: I don't know, maybe not unaware. I think I actually know,

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Speaker 1: but I've just you know, I'm just in avoidance or denial.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but there's a difference between understanding the concept and

404
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Speaker 2: I think people who struggle with stings in any given

405
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Speaker 2: time throughout their life are the ones who understand it

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Speaker 2: and articulate it better. I know, I can articulate things

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Speaker 2: that I still feel like I forever grapple with and

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Speaker 2: I've made progress in some areas, but in the most

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Speaker 2: meaningful areas of my life, it's still an ever present challenge.

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Speaker 2: And you know, the inner critic wants to call that

411
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Speaker 2: being a fraud, but the reality is no leaps in bounds.

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Speaker 2: It's just self awareness, and it's everybody.

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Speaker 1: Why do you think that we do things which in

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Speaker 1: the moment Maybe I'm answering the question in the question,

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Speaker 1: but anyway, why do we do things which kind of

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Speaker 1: make us feel great in the moment, but we know

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Speaker 1: that over the long term it's going to fuck us up,

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Speaker 1: or it has the potential to fuck us up. Like,

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Speaker 1: why do we have that right now mentality? Why are

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Speaker 1: we all about instant gratification? Why do we find it

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Speaker 1: so hard to go to be able to deny ourselves

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Speaker 1: something in the moment to create something better over the

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Speaker 1: long term.

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Speaker 2: I think we're driven by our chemical makeup. We're driven, right,

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Speaker 2: So we're driven for things. So where there's the thinking

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Speaker 2: us and then there's the beast of a body that

427
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Speaker 2: we live inside that has been given the means to

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Speaker 2: give us chemistry that creates behavior and outcome. And so

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Speaker 2: we can know like I know that that six minute

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Speaker 2: walk to that beautiful cookie shop I discovered last week

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Speaker 2: that I've been to four times since. I know that's

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Speaker 2: not the answer, but in the moment, that is the answer.

433
00:24:44,880 --> 00:24:47,919
Speaker 1: Well, I mean, if you were you could rationalize it,

434
00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:50,520
Speaker 1: you know the power of now, Well it's now, You've

435
00:24:50,520 --> 00:24:52,040
Speaker 1: got to be in the moment and here I am,

436
00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:53,640
Speaker 1: me and the cookie in the moment, you can all

437
00:24:53,640 --> 00:24:56,679
Speaker 1: get rooted. Like this is the dichotomy is because on

438
00:24:56,720 --> 00:24:59,480
Speaker 1: the one hand, we don't want to be living in

439
00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:01,919
Speaker 1: the past the future, but and we do want to

440
00:25:01,920 --> 00:25:06,280
Speaker 1: be in the present. But the reality is, you know,

441
00:25:06,320 --> 00:25:09,320
Speaker 1: we're going to have a lot a lot more present

442
00:25:09,440 --> 00:25:13,560
Speaker 1: moments moving forward, let's hope. I think it's it's trying

443
00:25:13,560 --> 00:25:16,760
Speaker 1: to get trying to get the balance. And also, you know,

444
00:25:16,840 --> 00:25:21,280
Speaker 1: for somebody like you who trains virtually every day and

445
00:25:21,320 --> 00:25:24,960
Speaker 1: who other than the chocolate and the cookies. You know,

446
00:25:25,119 --> 00:25:28,560
Speaker 1: your diet is very very strict, you know, like it's

447
00:25:28,800 --> 00:25:31,480
Speaker 1: it's not an issue for you. If you were morbidly

448
00:25:31,520 --> 00:25:34,520
Speaker 1: obese or unhealthy, or pre diabetic or diabetic or and

449
00:25:34,560 --> 00:25:37,120
Speaker 1: you were doing that, then that would be a problem.

450
00:25:37,160 --> 00:25:40,080
Speaker 1: But you ain't that, So I don't I think if

451
00:25:40,080 --> 00:25:42,280
Speaker 1: it did get to a point where it was a

452
00:25:42,320 --> 00:25:47,920
Speaker 1: real physical issue, a real health problem for you, I

453
00:25:47,960 --> 00:25:50,000
Speaker 1: can't see you continuing that behavior.

454
00:25:50,480 --> 00:25:55,400
Speaker 2: No. And that's that's just awareness and flexibility. And sometimes

455
00:25:55,480 --> 00:25:58,800
Speaker 2: I'm worse at it, and sometimes I'm really good and

456
00:25:58,880 --> 00:26:01,199
Speaker 2: so and it's taken me a lot of years to

457
00:26:01,440 --> 00:26:06,320
Speaker 2: be lenient on myself, and that's just because of the

458
00:26:06,359 --> 00:26:12,920
Speaker 2: awareness that doing something and then having a horrific inner

459
00:26:13,720 --> 00:26:18,520
Speaker 2: narrative about it is only creating more stress and angst

460
00:26:18,560 --> 00:26:23,000
Speaker 2: in my system. So it's the ability to just do

461
00:26:23,040 --> 00:26:26,200
Speaker 2: something and let it go and go, well, that's just information.

462
00:26:26,240 --> 00:26:28,560
Speaker 2: We're going to just observe that and be okay with it,

463
00:26:28,640 --> 00:26:31,960
Speaker 2: and we'll make decisions each time those moments come up,

464
00:26:32,000 --> 00:26:34,800
Speaker 2: and maybe one day the decisions will be different, but

465
00:26:34,920 --> 00:26:38,440
Speaker 2: each time I'll just be curious about it. Each time,

466
00:26:38,520 --> 00:26:41,240
Speaker 2: the cookie will be a delicious moment in the middle

467
00:26:41,280 --> 00:26:41,480
Speaker 2: of that.

468
00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:46,400
Speaker 1: You know, so many times I've worked with people over

469
00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:49,159
Speaker 1: the years who, you know, they did really well for

470
00:26:49,200 --> 00:26:52,439
Speaker 1: a period of time a week, two weeks, three weeks,

471
00:26:52,440 --> 00:26:58,080
Speaker 1: four weeks, five weeks, and then they had a let's

472
00:26:58,119 --> 00:27:00,439
Speaker 1: just call it a stumble or a fuck up. You know,

473
00:27:00,520 --> 00:27:03,159
Speaker 1: they went out and they ended up eating a pizza

474
00:27:03,280 --> 00:27:05,919
Speaker 1: or they had they were having a shit day. So

475
00:27:05,960 --> 00:27:09,320
Speaker 1: they ate four Tim Tams. And then because they opened

476
00:27:09,320 --> 00:27:13,040
Speaker 1: the pizza door or the Tim Tam door, then they go, ah,

477
00:27:13,160 --> 00:27:16,160
Speaker 1: now I've fucked it, I've fucked it. And then there's

478
00:27:16,240 --> 00:27:22,480
Speaker 1: this cascade of shitty behavior, you know, because they think

479
00:27:22,480 --> 00:27:25,359
Speaker 1: that they undid four weeks of good behavior with four

480
00:27:25,400 --> 00:27:28,680
Speaker 1: Tim Tams. And I always say, you know, the Tim

481
00:27:28,720 --> 00:27:32,199
Speaker 1: Tams ain't the problem. It's the emotional and psychological and

482
00:27:32,240 --> 00:27:38,280
Speaker 1: behavior reaction and your story after the for Tim Tams,

483
00:27:38,320 --> 00:27:40,240
Speaker 1: you know, not great, but no one's dying from for

484
00:27:40,440 --> 00:27:44,399
Speaker 1: Tim Tams, especially after four weeks of great behavior. But

485
00:27:44,480 --> 00:27:48,040
Speaker 1: it's like, maybe, you know, and this is something that

486
00:27:48,119 --> 00:27:52,920
Speaker 1: for me is important because I personally I'm a bit

487
00:27:53,040 --> 00:27:56,399
Speaker 1: all or nothing and we all know that, but I

488
00:27:56,440 --> 00:27:59,560
Speaker 1: would not recommend all or nothing for most people, you know.

489
00:27:59,760 --> 00:28:02,919
Speaker 1: It's it's like, I've never drunk, I've never been high.

490
00:28:03,160 --> 00:28:05,960
Speaker 1: I don't eat cake, I don't eat cookies, I don't

491
00:28:06,000 --> 00:28:09,800
Speaker 1: eat you know. But maybe, like I think I've got

492
00:28:09,840 --> 00:28:14,960
Speaker 1: it right for me, but I think for a lot

493
00:28:14,960 --> 00:28:17,199
Speaker 1: of people, my right would be there wrong, you know,

494
00:28:17,880 --> 00:28:19,400
Speaker 1: like for you for example.

495
00:28:21,359 --> 00:28:23,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I'm all or nothing with some things but

496
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:28,840
Speaker 2: not with others. Like I don't drink very often at all.

497
00:28:29,760 --> 00:28:33,359
Speaker 2: I drink less now simply because my sleep and my

498
00:28:34,119 --> 00:28:38,800
Speaker 2: performance in life is so important and it gets impacted.

499
00:28:39,720 --> 00:28:44,280
Speaker 2: But I also don't, for myself, believe that having a

500
00:28:44,360 --> 00:28:46,240
Speaker 2: drink every now and then is a problem. And some

501
00:28:46,280 --> 00:28:49,320
Speaker 2: people like to cut it out completely and go nat

502
00:28:49,360 --> 00:28:52,000
Speaker 2: never again, and I go, well, no, because there's also

503
00:28:52,080 --> 00:28:54,640
Speaker 2: for me, I think sometimes there's benefits. Sometimes I think, gee,

504
00:28:54,960 --> 00:28:58,000
Speaker 2: if my sleep wasn't packing it in lately, there's times

505
00:28:58,040 --> 00:28:59,560
Speaker 2: when I'll be like, gee, I wish I could just

506
00:28:59,600 --> 00:29:02,240
Speaker 2: have a glove wine and chill out, you know, for

507
00:29:02,320 --> 00:29:04,640
Speaker 2: one night this week or something, because I know that

508
00:29:04,680 --> 00:29:07,080
Speaker 2: the impact of having a glass of something and just

509
00:29:07,880 --> 00:29:09,640
Speaker 2: being able to let go a little bit and just

510
00:29:09,680 --> 00:29:13,280
Speaker 2: relax there is that experience to that. Which I don't

511
00:29:13,320 --> 00:29:16,280
Speaker 2: think is we don't have to always frame that as

512
00:29:16,320 --> 00:29:19,840
Speaker 2: being escapism, which a lot of people who have overcome

513
00:29:19,920 --> 00:29:23,320
Speaker 2: their own relationship with alcohol would like to point to

514
00:29:23,320 --> 00:29:25,360
Speaker 2: everyone and go, well, that's escapism. It's like, well, no,

515
00:29:25,440 --> 00:29:27,240
Speaker 2: that's not what my relationship is with that.

516
00:29:28,040 --> 00:29:33,120
Speaker 1: Yes, well that's exactly that. That's a significant factor. Be

517
00:29:33,200 --> 00:29:37,000
Speaker 1: it with food, be it with booze, you know, be

518
00:29:37,080 --> 00:29:42,080
Speaker 1: it with whatever, sex, gambling. It's like, how does that thing,

519
00:29:42,320 --> 00:29:47,120
Speaker 1: that variable impact your life, your health, your mindset? You know,

520
00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:52,840
Speaker 1: Like even something like exercise can be destructive if people

521
00:29:52,880 --> 00:29:56,120
Speaker 1: get to the point where it's all they fucking think about,

522
00:29:56,320 --> 00:29:59,360
Speaker 1: and it's you know, they exercise five hours a day

523
00:29:59,440 --> 00:30:02,040
Speaker 1: despite all of these negative consequences. You know. I think

524
00:30:02,040 --> 00:30:05,160
Speaker 1: it's called athletic and nevosa, you know, where people just

525
00:30:05,280 --> 00:30:09,080
Speaker 1: lose their ship and that just becomes a new addiction. So, like,

526
00:30:09,280 --> 00:30:13,640
Speaker 1: anything can be destructive. You know. It's like buying shit online,

527
00:30:14,120 --> 00:30:16,440
Speaker 1: as we were talking about. For some people that's just

528
00:30:16,520 --> 00:30:21,720
Speaker 1: a really intelligent, convenient option, and it means they don't

529
00:30:21,720 --> 00:30:24,200
Speaker 1: have to jump in the station wagon and pack in

530
00:30:24,280 --> 00:30:27,080
Speaker 1: two kids and go to the supermarket and it's like,

531
00:30:27,200 --> 00:30:29,640
Speaker 1: let's order that ship and just it arrives, you know,

532
00:30:30,400 --> 00:30:32,200
Speaker 1: as long as Tiff doesn't get her hands on it

533
00:30:32,200 --> 00:30:41,920
Speaker 1: because she's stealing, don't. Yeah, you know, but but it's

534
00:30:42,000 --> 00:30:47,239
Speaker 1: that just that ability to be able to understand, you know,

535
00:30:47,280 --> 00:30:50,800
Speaker 1: when and if like, you know, what's that Lady's name

536
00:30:50,880 --> 00:31:01,120
Speaker 1: is Sarah gray Batch, great, Sarah Russbatch, Sarah sorry, Sarah, yeah, yeah,

537
00:31:01,160 --> 00:31:04,240
Speaker 1: Sarah ruspat Yeah. And she talks about that gray area

538
00:31:04,360 --> 00:31:08,040
Speaker 1: drinking where it really starts, not necessarily an alcoholic, but

539
00:31:08,160 --> 00:31:11,040
Speaker 1: kind of heading in the direction and where you've got

540
00:31:11,080 --> 00:31:14,600
Speaker 1: to have enough self awareness to be able to encourage,

541
00:31:14,600 --> 00:31:18,120
Speaker 1: I guess to recognize, well, you know, maybe I'm not

542
00:31:18,160 --> 00:31:21,200
Speaker 1: a falling down drunk, but at the same time, this

543
00:31:21,480 --> 00:31:26,320
Speaker 1: is not making my life any better. Yeah, you know,

544
00:31:26,480 --> 00:31:31,440
Speaker 1: I was going to say about four months ago, maybe

545
00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:33,840
Speaker 1: five months ago now. I went up and I saw

546
00:31:33,920 --> 00:31:35,720
Speaker 1: Ron and Mary, my mum and dad for those who

547
00:31:35,760 --> 00:31:41,120
Speaker 1: don't know, and we went out for dinner. And Ron

548
00:31:41,240 --> 00:31:43,720
Speaker 1: just turned eighty five, so he was, you know, eighty

549
00:31:43,720 --> 00:31:48,640
Speaker 1: four and a half in a bit, and I was

550
00:31:48,760 --> 00:31:50,800
Speaker 1: just I hadn't seen them for a couple of months,

551
00:31:50,840 --> 00:31:54,040
Speaker 1: and I was shocked, don't tell my dad this everyone.

552
00:31:55,240 --> 00:31:57,880
Speaker 1: I was shocked how bad he was walking and he's

553
00:31:58,200 --> 00:32:01,000
Speaker 1: you know, like his balance and his I'm like, oh god,

554
00:32:01,080 --> 00:32:03,440
Speaker 1: it's like he got two years older in two months.

555
00:32:04,760 --> 00:32:07,320
Speaker 1: But what is amazing as we're talking about hell span

556
00:32:07,440 --> 00:32:11,000
Speaker 1: and lifespan and function and quality of life and longevity.

557
00:32:11,960 --> 00:32:17,560
Speaker 1: So that week I committed to being able to try

558
00:32:17,600 --> 00:32:20,240
Speaker 1: to not fix it because I can't fix it, but

559
00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:27,800
Speaker 1: to help him empower, support and courage finance to fix it.

560
00:32:27,960 --> 00:32:31,320
Speaker 1: So I got the amazing Josh Whittaker shout out to Josh,

561
00:32:31,560 --> 00:32:34,800
Speaker 1: who's an exose physiologist who lives up near mom and dad.

562
00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:38,680
Speaker 1: He's working with dad once a week. We joined him

563
00:32:38,720 --> 00:32:41,520
Speaker 1: up to a gym. I'm going up on Saturdays and

564
00:32:41,560 --> 00:32:43,680
Speaker 1: he's going to the gym himself once a week now,

565
00:32:43,720 --> 00:32:47,640
Speaker 1: so three times a week, the now eighty five year old.

566
00:32:48,240 --> 00:32:51,920
Speaker 1: And what's fucking amazing is he is I mean he's

567
00:32:51,960 --> 00:32:55,080
Speaker 1: still eighty five and he doesn't move like a teenager,

568
00:32:55,120 --> 00:32:59,320
Speaker 1: but he is so much better than he was six

569
00:32:59,360 --> 00:33:04,160
Speaker 1: months ago. Like he's stronger, his balance is better, he's walking,

570
00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:08,400
Speaker 1: his confidence, his gait, you know, his stride length, his

571
00:33:08,560 --> 00:33:13,440
Speaker 1: general stability, like everything is better. And you think he's

572
00:33:13,480 --> 00:33:15,960
Speaker 1: an eighty four and a half eighty five year old

573
00:33:16,040 --> 00:33:20,800
Speaker 1: now who's doing something that most people, even at fifty five,

574
00:33:20,840 --> 00:33:23,640
Speaker 1: are like, oh, I'm too old to go to the gym.

575
00:33:23,960 --> 00:33:26,000
Speaker 1: You know, he's gone to the gym three days a

576
00:33:26,040 --> 00:33:30,120
Speaker 1: week and he's improving significantly, and not only is he

577
00:33:30,200 --> 00:33:33,600
Speaker 1: getting stronger and better balance, but also you know, the

578
00:33:33,720 --> 00:33:36,640
Speaker 1: quality of life is better. Like a month and a

579
00:33:36,680 --> 00:33:40,120
Speaker 1: half two months ago, I got him a stick and

580
00:33:40,160 --> 00:33:42,479
Speaker 1: he was walking with a walking stick. He's not walking

581
00:33:42,520 --> 00:33:45,320
Speaker 1: with a stick anymore because he doesn't need it, like

582
00:33:46,400 --> 00:33:49,720
Speaker 1: you know, so I guess the that's none of that

583
00:33:49,880 --> 00:33:52,440
Speaker 1: is a surprise to you, tif but to our listeners,

584
00:33:52,480 --> 00:33:56,720
Speaker 1: it's like, your body is really fucking adaptable, and when

585
00:33:56,880 --> 00:34:01,480
Speaker 1: even if you think you're pass it and you might

586
00:34:01,480 --> 00:34:03,480
Speaker 1: not make the Olympic team, and you might not run

587
00:34:03,520 --> 00:34:05,880
Speaker 1: a marathon and you might not do twenty chinups, but

588
00:34:06,840 --> 00:34:09,120
Speaker 1: anything is better than nothing.

589
00:34:09,040 --> 00:34:12,279
Speaker 2: You know, And I think point out the things that

590
00:34:12,400 --> 00:34:16,719
Speaker 2: aren't just the physical work he's doing, but now he

591
00:34:16,800 --> 00:34:20,839
Speaker 2: has two people that come and connect and also the

592
00:34:20,880 --> 00:34:24,439
Speaker 2: words that you choose to use when you're speaking to him,

593
00:34:24,480 --> 00:34:29,040
Speaker 2: Like I'm so mindful of listening to both myself and

594
00:34:29,080 --> 00:34:33,080
Speaker 2: my client's dialogue around how we talk about life and

595
00:34:33,160 --> 00:34:38,920
Speaker 2: movement and progress and everything. I'm very aware that that's

596
00:34:38,960 --> 00:34:43,080
Speaker 2: the stuff that gets embedded. There's your sixty minutes with him,

597
00:34:44,120 --> 00:34:50,040
Speaker 2: and then there's the words that embed themselves unbeknowns to him,

598
00:34:50,080 --> 00:34:52,280
Speaker 2: that linger in his mind. And also just that moment

599
00:34:52,320 --> 00:34:55,239
Speaker 2: of connection where there's two guys rocking up, playing a

600
00:34:55,239 --> 00:34:57,000
Speaker 2: part and giving him a bit of purpose and then

601
00:34:57,000 --> 00:34:59,560
Speaker 2: he starts to see progress. There's so much that's not

602
00:34:59,680 --> 00:35:01,880
Speaker 2: just stress.

603
00:35:02,200 --> 00:35:06,480
Speaker 1: One hundred percent. Oh yeah, I love that. Yeah, And

604
00:35:06,520 --> 00:35:09,480
Speaker 1: you know what, like my dad's language, I love language

605
00:35:09,719 --> 00:35:15,960
Speaker 1: is words of affirmation. So it's very easy to make

606
00:35:16,040 --> 00:35:19,560
Speaker 1: him feel loved. Yeah, because he is progressing and he

607
00:35:19,680 --> 00:35:21,920
Speaker 1: is doing a good job, and I am proud of him,

608
00:35:21,960 --> 00:35:24,719
Speaker 1: and you know, I do pump up his ties and

609
00:35:24,760 --> 00:35:26,839
Speaker 1: I tell him how strong he's getting, and I tell

610
00:35:26,880 --> 00:35:28,759
Speaker 1: him how much better he's moving. And it's a better

611
00:35:28,840 --> 00:35:31,200
Speaker 1: range of movement, and he's more skillful, and he's doing

612
00:35:31,200 --> 00:35:34,640
Speaker 1: all the movements, you know, way better than he wasn't like,

613
00:35:34,760 --> 00:35:36,319
Speaker 1: And so I don't even have to I don't have

614
00:35:36,360 --> 00:35:39,400
Speaker 1: to manufacture it or try I just need to literally report,

615
00:35:40,160 --> 00:35:44,800
Speaker 1: you know, and so there's yeah, you're right, sociological, psychological, emotional,

616
00:35:44,840 --> 00:35:48,319
Speaker 1: and physiological benefits and that. And also we know that

617
00:35:48,520 --> 00:35:52,240
Speaker 1: as you're alluding to, like spending time with a couple

618
00:35:52,239 --> 00:35:55,120
Speaker 1: of guys that you know, Josh and myself even though

619
00:35:55,120 --> 00:35:59,000
Speaker 1: i'm his son, Like spending time with people who care

620
00:35:59,080 --> 00:36:03,440
Speaker 1: about you and want the best for you. It's it's healing,

621
00:36:03,760 --> 00:36:08,000
Speaker 1: Like it's literally boosts your immune system. It's literally good

622
00:36:08,080 --> 00:36:10,799
Speaker 1: for your brain chemistry. You know, on top of the

623
00:36:10,880 --> 00:36:13,759
Speaker 1: dopamine that you get and the cognitive benefits that you

624
00:36:13,840 --> 00:36:19,120
Speaker 1: get from lifting weights, there's also the oxytocin that your

625
00:36:19,120 --> 00:36:22,279
Speaker 1: body is producing when there's a bit of love going on.

626
00:36:22,880 --> 00:36:27,520
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, I think that over time, you know, with

627
00:36:28,239 --> 00:36:33,000
Speaker 2: doctor Bill and reflecting on how I came to the

628
00:36:33,000 --> 00:36:35,600
Speaker 2: point where one day I just realized this is this

629
00:36:35,640 --> 00:36:40,560
Speaker 2: has actually got my progress has nothing to do with

630
00:36:40,600 --> 00:36:44,080
Speaker 2: what we talk about, and everything to do with the

631
00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:47,879
Speaker 2: role that he plays when he shows up regularly into

632
00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:52,600
Speaker 2: my world and the relationship we have and helping knows me.

633
00:36:52,680 --> 00:36:54,680
Speaker 2: So it's not the work we do. And I think

634
00:36:54,880 --> 00:36:59,960
Speaker 2: my awareness on that at some point again unconsciously transferred

635
00:37:00,120 --> 00:37:03,239
Speaker 2: over into me realizing that was my role with my

636
00:37:03,360 --> 00:37:07,279
Speaker 2: clients is that I show up and it's not one

637
00:37:07,320 --> 00:37:10,120
Speaker 2: given session, it's who are they, who do they need

638
00:37:10,360 --> 00:37:14,759
Speaker 2: and how can I benefit them as well as just

639
00:37:14,840 --> 00:37:17,400
Speaker 2: whatever they're lead present at the time.

640
00:37:18,680 --> 00:37:22,279
Speaker 1: But I tell you a secret, that's what I try

641
00:37:22,320 --> 00:37:25,799
Speaker 1: to be for you, and I've always tried that well,

642
00:37:25,880 --> 00:37:29,480
Speaker 1: I've always tried to be that for you. And so yeah,

643
00:37:29,520 --> 00:37:31,920
Speaker 1: I can help you technically and give you you know,

644
00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:35,319
Speaker 1: all that, but also for you to have I don't

645
00:37:35,360 --> 00:37:37,480
Speaker 1: mean this to sound weird. I've never said to this

646
00:37:37,560 --> 00:37:40,360
Speaker 1: to you even like I've never said this to you,

647
00:37:40,440 --> 00:37:42,200
Speaker 1: So this is a very public way to do it.

648
00:37:42,239 --> 00:37:45,280
Speaker 1: But I know that you've had a shit run with blokes,

649
00:37:46,280 --> 00:37:48,719
Speaker 1: you know, and just to have a mail in your

650
00:37:48,760 --> 00:37:52,279
Speaker 1: life that actually just wants the best for you, that

651
00:37:52,400 --> 00:37:56,320
Speaker 1: doesn't want anything back, you know, just somebody who goes

652
00:37:56,480 --> 00:37:59,400
Speaker 1: somebody hopefully that I hope there's a bit of trust

653
00:37:59,440 --> 00:38:02,640
Speaker 1: and all that respect and all that, but that coming

654
00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:07,080
Speaker 1: from somebody that you respect genuinely wants you to do well,

655
00:38:07,400 --> 00:38:10,719
Speaker 1: Like not not pretend, you know. I used to say

656
00:38:10,800 --> 00:38:14,680
Speaker 1: to my clients my trainers all the time, care like,

657
00:38:15,400 --> 00:38:19,680
Speaker 1: don't pretend to care, actually care, And if you don't

658
00:38:19,880 --> 00:38:23,719
Speaker 1: actually care, do not do this job because people know,

659
00:38:24,040 --> 00:38:26,960
Speaker 1: even if you say all the right things, if it's bullshit,

660
00:38:27,000 --> 00:38:27,879
Speaker 1: people know, right.

661
00:38:28,280 --> 00:38:32,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, I literally had the conversation with him before this podcast.

662
00:38:32,640 --> 00:38:34,640
Speaker 2: That was my appointment that I came straight out of.

663
00:38:35,040 --> 00:38:37,680
Speaker 2: And I've talked about you being that literally, I'm not

664
00:38:37,680 --> 00:38:41,600
Speaker 2: even just saying this. I was talking about how I

665
00:38:41,719 --> 00:38:46,000
Speaker 2: relate to men and experience them, and how few of

666
00:38:46,040 --> 00:38:49,720
Speaker 2: them are in the world where I will really lean

667
00:38:49,760 --> 00:38:54,320
Speaker 2: in to any level of intimacy. Not physical intimacy obviously,

668
00:38:54,360 --> 00:38:58,280
Speaker 2: but just vulnerability. And you were one of two people

669
00:38:58,320 --> 00:39:00,839
Speaker 2: I mentioned, and I said, and there's the people I love,

670
00:39:01,120 --> 00:39:06,400
Speaker 2: but there's there's this invisible wall and this awareness and

671
00:39:06,480 --> 00:39:09,720
Speaker 2: this guard that I will that I inherently can't drop.

672
00:39:10,440 --> 00:39:15,759
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, thank you, Ah, pleasure, pleasure, I love.

673
00:39:16,160 --> 00:39:18,640
Speaker 1: I love being able to contribute in a small way.

674
00:39:18,719 --> 00:39:23,560
Speaker 1: But you know it's somebody reached out to me about

675
00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:27,960
Speaker 1: a month ago. I can't say who, doesn't matter, but

676
00:39:28,080 --> 00:39:31,240
Speaker 1: you've trained, You've trained with this person at the gym.

677
00:39:32,400 --> 00:39:35,040
Speaker 1: I'll tell you who it was, but you know who

678
00:39:35,080 --> 00:39:36,879
Speaker 1: it is a person who's come to the gym lately,

679
00:39:36,920 --> 00:39:39,920
Speaker 1: and I've helped this person a bit right. And I

680
00:39:39,960 --> 00:39:43,839
Speaker 1: saw them yesterday and I could tell they thinking, why

681
00:39:43,920 --> 00:39:48,120
Speaker 1: is he helping me? And I had to say I

682
00:39:48,120 --> 00:39:50,399
Speaker 1: didn't have to, but I kind of I just said,

683
00:39:50,440 --> 00:39:54,160
Speaker 1: I want you to know that, like I'm helping you

684
00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:58,400
Speaker 1: because someone asks, someone that I know and care about asked,

685
00:39:58,440 --> 00:40:01,080
Speaker 1: and someone that I trust, and and so that's why.

686
00:40:01,440 --> 00:40:04,560
Speaker 1: And I said, I don't want anything, like I don't.

687
00:40:04,719 --> 00:40:07,319
Speaker 1: I really don't want anything. You don't need to tell

688
00:40:07,360 --> 00:40:10,280
Speaker 1: people that I'm helping you. You don't need to thank

689
00:40:10,360 --> 00:40:12,560
Speaker 1: me every time, you don't, you know. And it's like,

690
00:40:13,640 --> 00:40:16,280
Speaker 1: and I don't always do that, and I'm not always

691
00:40:16,320 --> 00:40:19,640
Speaker 1: that for people, and you can't be everything for everyone,

692
00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:25,480
Speaker 1: but that you know that, and I guess even speaking

693
00:40:25,520 --> 00:40:28,400
Speaker 1: about it kind of negates it. I'm not, I'm which

694
00:40:28,480 --> 00:40:31,040
Speaker 1: is kind of silly, but I'm you know that whole

695
00:40:31,280 --> 00:40:33,600
Speaker 1: Like the Bible talks about when you give, don't let

696
00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:36,239
Speaker 1: your left hand know what your right hand's doing, like

697
00:40:37,160 --> 00:40:40,000
Speaker 1: when you can genuinely come from that place And I

698
00:40:40,080 --> 00:40:44,920
Speaker 1: don't always, but I try to where you're just like

699
00:40:45,000 --> 00:40:48,760
Speaker 1: caring about someone and loving someone and being being maybe

700
00:40:48,800 --> 00:40:54,879
Speaker 1: what that person needs. You know, you know, there's yeah,

701
00:40:54,920 --> 00:40:57,120
Speaker 1: there's a whole bunch of that going on at the moment.

702
00:40:57,120 --> 00:41:00,560
Speaker 1: And it's like when I because I can be a selfish,

703
00:41:00,560 --> 00:41:05,520
Speaker 1: self centered dick for a range of reasons, but I'm

704
00:41:05,560 --> 00:41:10,640
Speaker 1: always aware of or trying to be self aware in

705
00:41:10,680 --> 00:41:15,799
Speaker 1: that space and that being that because it's so it's

706
00:41:15,840 --> 00:41:20,480
Speaker 1: so easy in this self help, personal growth, health wellness

707
00:41:20,520 --> 00:41:25,279
Speaker 1: online you know, to be cheesy and bullshitty and say

708
00:41:25,320 --> 00:41:27,960
Speaker 1: all the stuff that is not actually when you pull

709
00:41:28,040 --> 00:41:29,880
Speaker 1: the curtain back, it's not true.

710
00:41:30,160 --> 00:41:35,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, last night at my Buddhist meditation class, the topic

711
00:41:35,680 --> 00:41:37,520
Speaker 2: and I'd missed the week before, so I didn't get

712
00:41:37,560 --> 00:41:39,800
Speaker 2: the first of the series. It was a series of

713
00:41:40,239 --> 00:41:44,520
Speaker 2: a topic, and the topic was understanding, So they were

714
00:41:44,600 --> 00:41:51,960
Speaker 2: unpacking love what and differentiating between attachment and that. They

715
00:41:51,960 --> 00:41:53,520
Speaker 2: talked about three types of love, but the one they

716
00:41:53,560 --> 00:41:58,000
Speaker 2: talked about last night was affectionate love. And just listening

717
00:41:58,040 --> 00:42:01,120
Speaker 2: to that and it's funny because as I was listening

718
00:42:01,200 --> 00:42:04,080
Speaker 2: and taking in the things that they were speaking of,

719
00:42:04,520 --> 00:42:07,719
Speaker 2: and there's this ability to love someone unconditionally like a

720
00:42:07,760 --> 00:42:12,080
Speaker 2: mother likes a child. But just what was funny for

721
00:42:12,160 --> 00:42:14,719
Speaker 2: me is going, what do I associate with love? Because

722
00:42:14,719 --> 00:42:18,640
Speaker 2: I've found it for years, to say I love you

723
00:42:18,719 --> 00:42:20,600
Speaker 2: to people that I love, or to let them know

724
00:42:20,680 --> 00:42:24,319
Speaker 2: that I love them felt so loaded, so loaded with

725
00:42:24,960 --> 00:42:30,680
Speaker 2: expectation and something that I that I didn't I wasn't

726
00:42:30,719 --> 00:42:36,560
Speaker 2: brave enough to say. And yeah, I think just listening

727
00:42:36,600 --> 00:42:41,360
Speaker 2: and going, oh, like it's okay to when if I

728
00:42:41,400 --> 00:42:43,840
Speaker 2: say I love you to someone that I'm not putting

729
00:42:43,920 --> 00:42:47,239
Speaker 2: any expectation or want on them, there's and I think

730
00:42:47,280 --> 00:42:52,879
Speaker 2: that for me, this discomfort is around well people, if

731
00:42:52,920 --> 00:42:56,360
Speaker 2: you allow someone to be in your world and connect

732
00:42:56,400 --> 00:42:59,080
Speaker 2: with you on you lay yourself to be vulnerable, then

733
00:42:59,600 --> 00:43:01,759
Speaker 2: you don't have any boundaries and they get to take

734
00:43:01,800 --> 00:43:04,920
Speaker 2: from you or they get to You're allowed you. You're

735
00:43:04,960 --> 00:43:08,319
Speaker 2: saying yes to whatever they want. It's just weird. It

736
00:43:08,320 --> 00:43:11,400
Speaker 2: was just like going on stuff coming up. This is

737
00:43:11,400 --> 00:43:12,239
Speaker 2: not on the other.

738
00:43:12,320 --> 00:43:14,239
Speaker 1: Do you remember the other I know maybe they didn't

739
00:43:14,239 --> 00:43:17,319
Speaker 1: talk about it, but three kinds of love affectionate love.

740
00:43:17,800 --> 00:43:18,719
Speaker 1: Do you know what the others are?

741
00:43:18,800 --> 00:43:23,640
Speaker 2: I think one was cherishing love, cherishing love. I can't

742
00:43:23,680 --> 00:43:28,759
Speaker 2: remember the descriptions. I remember affectionate love. And because it

743
00:43:28,800 --> 00:43:33,239
Speaker 2: wasn't really about how you like affection, it was just

744
00:43:33,640 --> 00:43:36,920
Speaker 2: it was about giving love just for love's sake and

745
00:43:36,960 --> 00:43:39,440
Speaker 2: not not because you want. And what was interesting is

746
00:43:39,440 --> 00:43:43,879
Speaker 2: because I think about people in relationships and how we

747
00:43:43,880 --> 00:43:47,479
Speaker 2: we most relationships have a version of attachment. We love

748
00:43:47,719 --> 00:43:50,359
Speaker 2: with the conditions of I love you, but you need

749
00:43:50,400 --> 00:43:53,880
Speaker 2: to behave like this because you know in relationships, especially

750
00:43:54,480 --> 00:44:00,000
Speaker 2: you know intimate relationships, as monogamous relationships, there are expectations

751
00:44:00,120 --> 00:44:03,239
Speaker 2: and kind of there are boundaries and rules spoken or unspoken.

752
00:44:03,280 --> 00:44:07,960
Speaker 2: And I was finding a lot coming up querying, well,

753
00:44:07,960 --> 00:44:12,280
Speaker 2: how do we navigate how do people navigate those relationships

754
00:44:12,280 --> 00:44:16,480
Speaker 2: if we just love unconditionally, Like, how do we how

755
00:44:16,480 --> 00:44:20,400
Speaker 2: do we love ourselves and then be okay with whatever?

756
00:44:21,200 --> 00:44:22,680
Speaker 2: I don't know, goods debt.

757
00:44:23,760 --> 00:44:27,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, I was trying to find that there's a scripture

758
00:44:27,280 --> 00:44:29,880
Speaker 1: that's always read out. Sorry, everyone's bore you with scriptures,

759
00:44:29,920 --> 00:44:34,080
Speaker 1: but it's a bit of my background. It's like it's

760
00:44:34,160 --> 00:44:40,920
Speaker 1: known as like the wedding passage in Corinthians. What is it?

761
00:44:40,920 --> 00:44:44,120
Speaker 1: It's like, Yeah, lover's patient. Love is kind, Love does

762
00:44:44,160 --> 00:44:46,399
Speaker 1: not envy or boast. Love is not eric and or rude.

763
00:44:46,440 --> 00:44:48,719
Speaker 1: It does not insist on its own way. Love is

764
00:44:48,760 --> 00:44:51,799
Speaker 1: not irritable or is zemful. It does not rejoice it wrongdoing,

765
00:44:52,280 --> 00:44:55,840
Speaker 1: but rejoices in the truth. And it's like where love lives,

766
00:44:55,840 --> 00:44:57,680
Speaker 1: there is no fear and all this it goes on.

767
00:44:57,800 --> 00:45:01,840
Speaker 1: But it's like, yeah, that like love is not a strategy,

768
00:45:01,880 --> 00:45:06,960
Speaker 1: you know. Sometimes that's why love is like loving is.

769
00:45:09,600 --> 00:45:14,960
Speaker 1: It's it's vulnerable, like you you know. I was listening

770
00:45:15,040 --> 00:45:20,680
Speaker 1: to these two ladies talk on a podcast, right, and

771
00:45:20,719 --> 00:45:24,160
Speaker 1: they're talking about when you send a message to someone

772
00:45:25,360 --> 00:45:29,719
Speaker 1: and you put and it could be like just like

773
00:45:31,000 --> 00:45:34,239
Speaker 1: I often will put a kiss at the end if

774
00:45:34,239 --> 00:45:38,160
Speaker 1: I'm sending it to a mate, but it's like or

775
00:45:38,200 --> 00:45:41,600
Speaker 1: a heart, Like if I send Patrick messages because we

776
00:45:41,719 --> 00:45:44,680
Speaker 1: know each other well, I'll often put kiss, kiss or

777
00:45:44,800 --> 00:45:48,480
Speaker 1: heart or whatever. Right, When you send a message to

778
00:45:48,520 --> 00:45:52,600
Speaker 1: someone and you send two kisses and they send a

779
00:45:52,640 --> 00:45:57,600
Speaker 1: message back with no affection and you're like, oh, or

780
00:45:57,640 --> 00:46:01,520
Speaker 1: they send a heart and you think, fuck, do I

781
00:46:01,560 --> 00:46:03,560
Speaker 1: have to send a heart back because I don't know

782
00:46:03,640 --> 00:46:07,200
Speaker 1: this person that well. Or you send the message which

783
00:46:07,320 --> 00:46:10,680
Speaker 1: might be semi business or something, and you just put

784
00:46:10,680 --> 00:46:12,799
Speaker 1: a heart at the end because that's your habit, and

785
00:46:12,840 --> 00:46:15,600
Speaker 1: then you're like, oh, fuck, I just sent you know

786
00:46:15,640 --> 00:46:18,480
Speaker 1: that bloke from BHP. I'm doing a gig for I

787
00:46:18,640 --> 00:46:21,240
Speaker 1: just send him a red heart, old mate at fucking

788
00:46:21,280 --> 00:46:23,839
Speaker 1: head office, and I'm like, how do I undo this

789
00:46:23,920 --> 00:46:27,480
Speaker 1: red heart that I just said? This dude, it's like

790
00:46:27,560 --> 00:46:32,360
Speaker 1: these social kind of expectations or standards of with texting

791
00:46:32,440 --> 00:46:35,319
Speaker 1: and messaging in the fucking electronic form.

792
00:46:35,280 --> 00:46:38,960
Speaker 2: So yeah, you don't know what people associate with that.

793
00:46:39,280 --> 00:46:41,759
Speaker 2: I'm the same. I put kisses and hearts on the

794
00:46:41,880 --> 00:46:45,359
Speaker 2: end of most messages and sometimes if I'm messaging some

795
00:46:45,440 --> 00:46:47,640
Speaker 2: bloke or a client, I'm like, oh, I got to

796
00:46:47,680 --> 00:46:49,439
Speaker 2: delete that. I'm like, oh, I don't want to send

797
00:46:49,480 --> 00:46:51,320
Speaker 2: them out because you don't know how they're going to

798
00:46:51,400 --> 00:46:53,760
Speaker 2: interpret it. Well, yeah, it flirty.

799
00:46:54,360 --> 00:46:57,960
Speaker 1: If i'm it's funny because if so my best mates,

800
00:46:58,320 --> 00:47:03,160
Speaker 1: so you know Vin from school, Greg from my churchy days,

801
00:47:03,680 --> 00:47:06,200
Speaker 1: the Crab of course, who I trained, like all of them,

802
00:47:06,600 --> 00:47:10,200
Speaker 1: all of my mates Patrick all heart, They all get

803
00:47:10,239 --> 00:47:15,000
Speaker 1: hearts and kisses. The Crab though, the bloke whose life

804
00:47:15,040 --> 00:47:18,239
Speaker 1: I saved, the bloke I had my mouth on his

805
00:47:18,360 --> 00:47:21,000
Speaker 1: mouth for eleven minutes trying to fucking bring him back

806
00:47:21,000 --> 00:47:25,480
Speaker 1: from the dead. If I send him a heart, that'd

807
00:47:25,520 --> 00:47:28,799
Speaker 1: be it'd be all over. He wouldn't know what he'd

808
00:47:28,880 --> 00:47:30,960
Speaker 1: have a fucking aneurysm. He wouldn't know what to do.

809
00:47:31,000 --> 00:47:33,799
Speaker 1: I shouldn't joke about that. He wouldn't know what to do,

810
00:47:34,520 --> 00:47:39,360
Speaker 1: you know. It's like yeah, yeah, And it was funny.

811
00:47:39,360 --> 00:47:44,360
Speaker 1: When I passed my final academic milestone for my PhD,

812
00:47:44,080 --> 00:47:48,680
Speaker 1: he taking he's taken. This one's sound interesting. I apologize,

813
00:47:48,719 --> 00:47:53,160
Speaker 1: But for the crab, this is a fucking major emotional breakthrough.

814
00:47:53,560 --> 00:47:58,759
Speaker 1: Like this is like, okay, this is big. Anyway, So

815
00:47:58,800 --> 00:48:01,120
Speaker 1: he came to the gym the day, you know, we're training.

816
00:48:01,120 --> 00:48:03,399
Speaker 1: That night I had my final review through the day.

817
00:48:03,840 --> 00:48:05,880
Speaker 1: I was really nervous. I was pretty sure I was

818
00:48:05,920 --> 00:48:10,200
Speaker 1: going to fail. Anyway, I got through. I got through,

819
00:48:10,320 --> 00:48:12,960
Speaker 1: I passed, and he's like, he came up and he

820
00:48:13,040 --> 00:48:18,160
Speaker 1: gave me a hug. I'm like, who are you? Who's

821
00:48:18,280 --> 00:48:23,040
Speaker 1: hijacked my friend's body? Like he's never ever given me

822
00:48:23,080 --> 00:48:25,439
Speaker 1: a hug? And he goes, oh, I guess I better

823
00:48:25,520 --> 00:48:27,360
Speaker 1: hug you then, and he gave me a hug. I'm like,

824
00:48:27,840 --> 00:48:31,240
Speaker 1: and it's funny, like and it was clunky and awkward,

825
00:48:31,239 --> 00:48:34,560
Speaker 1: but I fucking loved that hug. That's probably the only

826
00:48:34,560 --> 00:48:35,799
Speaker 1: one I'm ever going to get, right.

827
00:48:35,719 --> 00:48:38,520
Speaker 2: I was just about to say that. Just savor that moment.

828
00:48:38,880 --> 00:48:42,720
Speaker 1: It's the fucking unicorn, that's the four leaf clover of hugs.

829
00:48:42,760 --> 00:48:47,280
Speaker 1: That motherfucker is never happening again. So it's burned into

830
00:48:47,360 --> 00:48:50,319
Speaker 1: my my cells, never letting it go.

831
00:48:51,000 --> 00:48:53,560
Speaker 2: It's funny because he's such a gentle soul that I

832
00:48:53,600 --> 00:48:56,239
Speaker 2: wouldn't have picked him to be a non hugger. I

833
00:48:56,719 --> 00:48:58,560
Speaker 2: would have actually picked the opposit. I would have picked

834
00:48:58,640 --> 00:49:00,799
Speaker 2: him to be a real hugger. I think you tried

835
00:49:00,800 --> 00:49:02,680
Speaker 2: to trick me once when I didn't know, and you

836
00:49:02,680 --> 00:49:05,359
Speaker 2: will go give him a hug. He wants a hug

837
00:49:05,440 --> 00:49:08,760
Speaker 2: and the look, but what was the Oh.

838
00:49:08,719 --> 00:49:11,520
Speaker 1: God, yeah, I fuck off with your hugs. And you

839
00:49:11,560 --> 00:49:16,640
Speaker 1: know what else. He doesn't do compliments, compliments like has

840
00:49:16,680 --> 00:49:18,600
Speaker 1: he ever said to you you look great? I mean

841
00:49:18,640 --> 00:49:23,520
Speaker 1: you've met it a thousand times. No, No, he's never

842
00:49:23,680 --> 00:49:25,160
Speaker 1: ever Not that I need it.

843
00:49:25,200 --> 00:49:28,400
Speaker 2: Maybe I've never looked great, so that puts an effort

844
00:49:28,400 --> 00:49:29,120
Speaker 2: in next time.

845
00:49:29,640 --> 00:49:32,400
Speaker 1: He's funny, though, but he would think you look great.

846
00:49:32,600 --> 00:49:35,440
Speaker 1: He just won't tell you. It's like my dad. It's

847
00:49:35,480 --> 00:49:37,759
Speaker 1: been to the Ron Harper School of communication.

848
00:49:38,480 --> 00:49:43,359
Speaker 2: Well, it's not been that long since I started paying

849
00:49:43,400 --> 00:49:46,440
Speaker 2: attention to the fact that, hey, Tiff, people don't do

850
00:49:46,800 --> 00:49:48,680
Speaker 2: Like I said before, people don't know you love them

851
00:49:48,719 --> 00:49:50,680
Speaker 2: unless you tell them. All the people that you love

852
00:49:50,760 --> 00:49:54,160
Speaker 2: so deeply that you that are meaningful friends to you,

853
00:49:54,239 --> 00:49:56,880
Speaker 2: most of them don't know. And you're always so busy

854
00:49:57,400 --> 00:50:00,719
Speaker 2: that the amount of time you spend with them is

855
00:50:00,880 --> 00:50:03,120
Speaker 2: going to indicate that you need to tell people.

856
00:50:03,840 --> 00:50:07,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know big Josh, who's been on the show

857
00:50:07,440 --> 00:50:11,040
Speaker 1: it was on recently. I don't know how much I

858
00:50:11,120 --> 00:50:13,200
Speaker 1: meant to say, but anyway, so he's been through a

859
00:50:13,239 --> 00:50:16,120
Speaker 1: reasonably incht I'll tell you off fair but I can't.

860
00:50:16,280 --> 00:50:19,120
Speaker 1: I can't without his permission share. But you know, so

861
00:50:19,280 --> 00:50:22,680
Speaker 1: a kind of a good thing, not a bad thing,

862
00:50:22,800 --> 00:50:25,400
Speaker 1: a good thing. And so I just sent him a

863
00:50:25,400 --> 00:50:27,560
Speaker 1: message before because I haven't spoken to him for a

864
00:50:27,560 --> 00:50:31,399
Speaker 1: few weeks and like I love Josh, like Josh. If

865
00:50:31,400 --> 00:50:35,640
Speaker 1: you met Josh in his heyday, Josh is a or

866
00:50:35,960 --> 00:50:39,160
Speaker 1: was a you know, Australia's best body built one hundred

867
00:50:39,200 --> 00:50:43,080
Speaker 1: and forty kilo giant muscles on muscles on muscles. But

868
00:50:43,160 --> 00:50:45,719
Speaker 1: underneath all that, he's just a big baby that needs love,

869
00:50:46,560 --> 00:50:48,839
Speaker 1: you know, not in a pathetic way, it's just you know,

870
00:50:49,400 --> 00:50:51,399
Speaker 1: and him and I have a good relationship and I'm

871
00:50:51,440 --> 00:50:52,960
Speaker 1: like a bit of a big brother to him, and

872
00:50:53,800 --> 00:50:55,480
Speaker 1: you know, every now and then I just send him

873
00:50:55,520 --> 00:50:57,759
Speaker 1: some love. I just go home, mate, thinking about you.

874
00:50:57,880 --> 00:51:00,600
Speaker 1: Hope you're great, hope you're healing up. I hope you're

875
00:51:00,600 --> 00:51:04,960
Speaker 1: not in too much pain, and love your lots. And

876
00:51:05,239 --> 00:51:08,560
Speaker 1: it's like three sentences and then he right, you know,

877
00:51:08,600 --> 00:51:11,279
Speaker 1: And I just think it's good that men men and

878
00:51:11,320 --> 00:51:13,520
Speaker 1: women too. But it can be a bit precarious when

879
00:51:13,560 --> 00:51:16,640
Speaker 1: I send that kind of a message to women, and

880
00:51:16,680 --> 00:51:22,480
Speaker 1: it shouldn't be, but I understand it. But it's I think,

881
00:51:23,040 --> 00:51:25,600
Speaker 1: like I'm more comfortable than ever I have been in

882
00:51:25,640 --> 00:51:28,880
Speaker 1: my life with telling men that I love them and

883
00:51:28,960 --> 00:51:31,760
Speaker 1: not like love ya and punch them on the shoulder,

884
00:51:31,960 --> 00:51:35,160
Speaker 1: just go like the actual words, I love you, mate,

885
00:51:35,320 --> 00:51:38,680
Speaker 1: and I'm here and if you need anything, and I'm

886
00:51:38,719 --> 00:51:40,800
Speaker 1: not going away and I'm always going to be around

887
00:51:40,840 --> 00:51:45,400
Speaker 1: for you the end, you know, And then it doesn't

888
00:51:45,400 --> 00:51:49,040
Speaker 1: need to be some big fucking emotional saga. But you

889
00:51:49,080 --> 00:51:52,160
Speaker 1: can just say that, right and then if they reach

890
00:51:52,200 --> 00:51:54,879
Speaker 1: out or don't reach out, you've done what you can

891
00:51:54,920 --> 00:51:59,080
Speaker 1: do and you've said you know, I'm here for you. Yeah.

892
00:51:59,080 --> 00:52:01,960
Speaker 1: For me, that's been very liberating. And I've always been

893
00:52:02,080 --> 00:52:06,880
Speaker 1: reasonably huggy, touchy, not touchy that sounds bad, but reasonably

894
00:52:07,000 --> 00:52:11,319
Speaker 1: comfortable hugging my friends. But yeah, going to that next

895
00:52:11,400 --> 00:52:16,480
Speaker 1: level where you actually say I love you, not love

896
00:52:16,560 --> 00:52:19,120
Speaker 1: your punch on the arm, which is very Australian bloke,

897
00:52:19,320 --> 00:52:21,520
Speaker 1: or love your mate, love your mate, you know all

898
00:52:21,600 --> 00:52:27,480
Speaker 1: that but semantics, I guess. But yeah, so well, the

899
00:52:27,480 --> 00:52:30,799
Speaker 1: bottom line is everyone go and hug someone, give them

900
00:52:30,880 --> 00:52:34,440
Speaker 1: some love, and however old you are or young, you

901
00:52:34,480 --> 00:52:38,279
Speaker 1: are back to our original discussion. Well I think the

902
00:52:38,320 --> 00:52:40,040
Speaker 1: original discussion was headphones.

903
00:52:40,080 --> 00:52:40,279
Speaker 2: Fuck.

904
00:52:40,320 --> 00:52:43,719
Speaker 1: We've come a long way, haven't we. We've gone the

905
00:52:43,760 --> 00:52:47,399
Speaker 1: full circle. I don't know. I really don't have any

906
00:52:47,400 --> 00:52:50,040
Speaker 1: more news for you, or any more instructions or wisdom.

907
00:52:50,520 --> 00:52:56,560
Speaker 1: Did I ever have any wisdom? If you want Tiff

908
00:52:56,600 --> 00:53:00,400
Speaker 1: to come and work with your team, she's available, she'svailable,

909
00:53:00,600 --> 00:53:05,000
Speaker 1: she's available for her speaking and coaching and workshops. And

910
00:53:05,080 --> 00:53:07,640
Speaker 1: if you've got an even bigger budget, and so am I.

911
00:53:09,719 --> 00:53:13,239
Speaker 2: Ah sellah Kidney and you can have us both.

912
00:53:13,840 --> 00:53:17,640
Speaker 1: Chop half your leg all right, love you everyone. See

913
00:53:17,680 --> 00:53:19,520
Speaker 1: I didn't say I love you I said love you.

914
00:53:19,760 --> 00:53:20,760
Speaker 1: Have a good day everyone.

915
00:53:20,920 --> 00:53:22,760
Speaker 2: Thanks Stiff, Thanks Harms,