WEBVTT - Fence Sitters | Harps & Tiff - 903 0:00:01.680 --> 0:00:03.840 She said, it's now never. 0:00:04.760 --> 0:00:07.480 I got fighting in my blood. 0:00:09.039 --> 0:00:12.479 I'm tiff This is role with the punches and we're 0:00:12.520 --> 0:00:17.119 turning life's hardest hits into wins. Nobody wants to go 0:00:17.200 --> 0:00:20.599 to court, and don't. My friends at test Art Family 0:00:20.680 --> 0:00:25.160 Lawyers know that they offer all forms of alternative dispute resolution. 0:00:25.720 --> 0:00:29.200 Their team of Melbourne family lawyers have extensive experience in 0:00:29.360 --> 0:00:32.960 all areas of family law to facto and same sex couples, 0:00:33.159 --> 0:00:37.280 custody and children, family violence and intervention orders, property settlements 0:00:37.360 --> 0:00:41.680 and financial agreements. Test Art is in your corner, so 0:00:41.840 --> 0:00:45.440 reach out to Mark and the team at www dot 0:00:45.800 --> 0:00:54.920 test Artfamilylawyers dot com dot au. Cray, Anthony Harfer, Tiffany 0:00:54.920 --> 0:00:59.920 and Corkierie is Happy Wednesday, sir. 0:01:00.440 --> 0:01:02.720 Thanks Bro, Thanks Bryce Sephine. That are you good? 0:01:03.200 --> 0:01:03.320 Oh? 0:01:03.320 --> 0:01:03.840 I'm great. 0:01:03.920 --> 0:01:06.760 I just had a great sparring session with someone with 0:01:06.840 --> 0:01:09.440 two percent vision, So that was that was the highlight 0:01:09.480 --> 0:01:10.160 of my day. 0:01:11.040 --> 0:01:16.880 That's not the perfect opponent. How do you walk us 0:01:16.880 --> 0:01:19.720 through that a little bit? How does one spa with 0:01:19.840 --> 0:01:23.080 somebody who can't see? Do you have bells on your gloves? 0:01:24.720 --> 0:01:26.720 Well, here's the deal, I thought to myself. I haven't 0:01:26.720 --> 0:01:30.760 sparred since last years. I've barely picked up the boxing gloves, 0:01:30.800 --> 0:01:32.720 to be honest. So I was like, oh, not really, 0:01:32.840 --> 0:01:34.400 you know, I haven't been doing it, but yeah, sure, 0:01:34.440 --> 0:01:36.759 if there's anyone i'll say yes to. It's a blind guy. 0:01:37.480 --> 0:01:42.000 Yeah, reason, we'll shout out to our vision impeded listeners. 0:01:42.480 --> 0:01:45.640 And if you think just being insensitive, she. 0:01:45.800 --> 0:01:50.640 Is, well no, right, I thought, well this, you know, 0:01:51.040 --> 0:01:53.200 this can't be too dangerous. I did put a mouthguard 0:01:53.240 --> 0:01:57.760 in though, but nothing quite sticks to you like shit 0:01:57.880 --> 0:02:01.600 to a blanket. Then one that can't see but has 0:02:01.800 --> 0:02:05.640 keen other senses. I could not shake that bugger. It 0:02:05.800 --> 0:02:08.560 was right there. In fact, there was only one time 0:02:08.639 --> 0:02:11.360 I was quiet enough to sneak around and he was 0:02:11.480 --> 0:02:15.160 like like a ninja, going where is she? The rest 0:02:15.240 --> 0:02:16.760 of the time He's right that. The rest of the 0:02:16.760 --> 0:02:19.200 time you would not if you were watching on you 0:02:19.240 --> 0:02:24.399 wouldn't know you were watching one vision impaired person sparring. 0:02:26.120 --> 0:02:28.480 I mean, could you try to explain it to us? 0:02:28.639 --> 0:02:31.120 I'm trying to figure out how does so he's not 0:02:31.160 --> 0:02:32.400 a boxer, right. 0:02:32.360 --> 0:02:34.720 No, no, no, So this is they've got an event 0:02:34.760 --> 0:02:36.799 in a couple of weeks it's up in Queensland. It's 0:02:36.800 --> 0:02:39.919 a bunch of podcasters actually, and they wanted to find 0:02:40.000 --> 0:02:44.040 two blind podcasters to have this fight at this event. 0:02:44.240 --> 0:02:47.120 And that just seems that sunms cruel they. 0:02:47.120 --> 0:02:51.240 Could find one, so they've made it even more crazy. 0:02:51.280 --> 0:02:54.240 They're putting seven blokes in the ring, six of them 0:02:54.280 --> 0:03:00.560 being blindfolded, and Benny, who's two percent vision, and they're 0:03:00.560 --> 0:03:03.840 just gonna let him go for gold. So he brings 0:03:03.880 --> 0:03:08.399 me up a week ago, goes, I haven't actually done 0:03:08.400 --> 0:03:11.920 any sparring. Could you punch me in the face? And 0:03:12.040 --> 0:03:14.799 I said sure, sure, think sure. Think he was really good, 0:03:15.000 --> 0:03:18.360 actually really good. There's I think that there is a 0:03:18.480 --> 0:03:24.080 lot that can be an advantage about not having vision 0:03:24.160 --> 0:03:26.920 when you're learning things with your other senses. When you're 0:03:27.200 --> 0:03:29.760 like his hair, his gloves are stuck to his face, 0:03:30.120 --> 0:03:33.680 he's not getting you know, when our eyes go places, 0:03:33.720 --> 0:03:36.520 it affects our balance. Just there's a lot of information 0:03:36.640 --> 0:03:40.080 coming in when you're boxing, you're moving, you're watching, you're protecting, 0:03:40.120 --> 0:03:43.680 you're feeling things, you're seeing things, depth, perception, all of 0:03:43.680 --> 0:03:46.960 that stuff. His head doesn't lift twenty punches because he's 0:03:46.960 --> 0:03:50.640 not following his eyes anywhere, So he stays down, he holds. 0:03:50.680 --> 0:03:53.800 It's really good. Actually, I was super impressed. 0:03:54.560 --> 0:03:56.840 Now, if you're in any way trying to convince the 0:03:56.920 --> 0:04:00.000 listeners and I that there's some kind of fucking advance 0:04:00.040 --> 0:04:02.720 manage to not being able to see when you're boxing, 0:04:03.160 --> 0:04:07.760 you're doing a terrible job because none of us believe you. 0:04:07.240 --> 0:04:10.240 That's the worst Bloody sales pitch. 0:04:10.720 --> 0:04:10.920 Oh. 0:04:11.000 --> 0:04:13.520 Look, he's got a real advantage because he's got amazing, 0:04:14.000 --> 0:04:16.680 you know, senses, you know what's good sense for boxing. 0:04:16.839 --> 0:04:20.560 Been able to fucking see the glove coming at you. Fuck, 0:04:22.839 --> 0:04:26.400 that's hilarious. Well, good on him, shout out to Benny. 0:04:26.480 --> 0:04:30.720 But also I'm thinking, I'm guessing this is not a 0:04:30.760 --> 0:04:35.479 sanctioned event. Seven blindfolded or six blindfolded people and a 0:04:35.520 --> 0:04:39.040 blind bloke in a ring throwing cut lunches. That just 0:04:39.080 --> 0:04:46.560 seems like something from Bloody what's that stupid show where 0:04:46.600 --> 0:04:50.080 they all used to do crazy things? You know, all 0:04:50.120 --> 0:04:59.840 those guys, you know, there was a whole show Jackass Jacks. 0:05:00.160 --> 0:05:02.040 That's just an episode of Jackass. 0:05:02.360 --> 0:05:04.960 Well it's going to be doing it in front of 0:05:05.080 --> 0:05:09.080 five thousand people in the audience, So I don't know. 0:05:09.040 --> 0:05:11.279 How they get insurance for that or how they get 0:05:11.279 --> 0:05:14.080 that sanction. That just seems like me personally, I'm like, 0:05:14.160 --> 0:05:16.000 fuck yeah, let's do that every weekend. 0:05:16.520 --> 0:05:20.880 Well, the thing that concerns me the most is the 0:05:21.320 --> 0:05:25.080 advantage to wearing punches when you're boxing is you see 0:05:25.080 --> 0:05:27.839 them and you learn how to wear them, and you 0:05:28.080 --> 0:05:30.760 don't get punched from behind or you see them coming, 0:05:30.920 --> 0:05:37.599 so you're absorbing them properly and going to be seven 0:05:37.600 --> 0:05:39.200 blokes in the ring. People are going to get punched 0:05:39.200 --> 0:05:41.159 in the back of the head. They're going to be 0:05:41.320 --> 0:05:45.839 frantically swinging punches and thus wearing them when they can't 0:05:45.880 --> 0:05:50.400 be seen, and that's very in my opinion, it's possible 0:05:50.440 --> 0:05:53.839 to be quite a bit more dangerous. But I was very. 0:05:53.680 --> 0:05:57.039 Impressing about that. Nothing about that. That's a good idea. 0:05:57.160 --> 0:06:03.640 It's hilarious, hilarious, But from somebody who studies the brain somewhat, 0:06:05.760 --> 0:06:07.360 I can tell you, if you want to make your 0:06:07.360 --> 0:06:10.800 brain work worse, just shut your eyes and let people 0:06:10.880 --> 0:06:12.760 hit you in the head. Yeah. 0:06:12.800 --> 0:06:15.040 Do you know what's interesting is I was having a 0:06:15.120 --> 0:06:17.720 quick chat with him afterwards just about the idea of 0:06:18.960 --> 0:06:23.960 people white people are mean, Like he's got two percent visions, 0:06:23.960 --> 0:06:26.040 so I was saying to him, I'd give anything to 0:06:27.400 --> 0:06:29.800 to come to just pop in to see what you 0:06:29.880 --> 0:06:32.800 see for a moment, because I'm curious, but so many 0:06:32.839 --> 0:06:37.040 people because he sees dark, so he looked around, he goes, 0:06:37.120 --> 0:06:40.480 I can't see the ring. I can't see anything. 0:06:40.520 --> 0:06:41.279 All that's black. 0:06:41.360 --> 0:06:44.040 And then he looked up and there's a high ceiling 0:06:44.080 --> 0:06:46.720 with a beam of light that comes in. He goes, 0:06:46.760 --> 0:06:50.359 I can see like a lighter line across there. And 0:06:50.400 --> 0:06:52.160 then he turned to another wall and he said, and 0:06:52.360 --> 0:06:55.800 this over here looks a bit lighter, so he can 0:06:55.839 --> 0:07:00.640 see bits of light. And I said, you know, when 0:07:00.680 --> 0:07:03.599 I walk in, he's sitting at a table in front 0:07:03.600 --> 0:07:07.239 of a computer, tinkering on a laptop. And I'm like, dude, 0:07:07.360 --> 0:07:09.760 I'm here to spar the blind guy, like who are you? 0:07:10.560 --> 0:07:11.400 Yeah, exactly. 0:07:11.760 --> 0:07:15.960 And the people that get angry and mean because they're like, 0:07:16.120 --> 0:07:19.760 you're not blind and get aggressive about it, and it's 0:07:19.880 --> 0:07:21.600 isn't that interesting? Human behavior? 0:07:22.600 --> 0:07:26.119 Human? But well, I think that's my life in your life, 0:07:26.160 --> 0:07:29.280 isn't it. I mean, yeah, I've been studying it in 0:07:29.360 --> 0:07:33.760 one way or another for my entire life. And I'm, 0:07:34.280 --> 0:07:37.200 you know, ten minutes away from finishing my whole kitten 0:07:37.240 --> 0:07:39.600 kaboodle at Uni. And I still don't fucking know how 0:07:39.720 --> 0:07:42.920 humans work, and I still people still, you know, you're 0:07:42.920 --> 0:07:45.640 never going to know. Like the human condition is what 0:07:45.760 --> 0:07:49.880 makes somebody kind and generous and loving and compassionate to 0:07:50.000 --> 0:07:53.600 a stranger that they'll never see again. Like I love that, 0:07:53.880 --> 0:07:56.920 And like we have all ends of the spectrum. We 0:07:57.000 --> 0:08:01.760 have people that are complete you knows, and psychopaths and 0:08:01.960 --> 0:08:06.160 manipulative narcissists to do anything to get anything, and will 0:08:06.240 --> 0:08:09.000 lie and cannive and can be charismatic and charming and 0:08:09.040 --> 0:08:14.400 full of shit. And then yeah, the people at the 0:08:14.440 --> 0:08:18.200 other end and the people in between, and the you know, 0:08:18.400 --> 0:08:23.320 it's like it's yeah, I don't think there's an answer 0:08:23.320 --> 0:08:27.120 to that question, but I think some people seem to. 0:08:27.440 --> 0:08:30.800 You know, what's it called? Ah, there's a there's a 0:08:30.920 --> 0:08:34.040 name for it. It's called something like Shathan Freuden or something. 0:08:34.080 --> 0:08:37.679 I'll look at it, but it's basically a German word 0:08:37.840 --> 0:08:44.480 for this concept that people take delight in other people's pain. Yeah, yeah, 0:08:44.520 --> 0:08:49.000 and it's it's it's it's a thing. I only learned 0:08:49.000 --> 0:08:50.679 the term the other day and I can't remember it. 0:08:50.920 --> 0:08:53.439 I need to. It's funny. I need to use things, 0:08:54.880 --> 0:08:57.160 you know, Like when I learned something, I'm like, I've 0:08:57.160 --> 0:08:58.960 got to teach that in the next day or two 0:08:59.080 --> 0:09:00.720 or three. And then if if I teach it a 0:09:00.720 --> 0:09:03.760 few times then it gets him better. Then I pretty 0:09:03.800 --> 0:09:07.480 much never forget it, but until it's locked in there. 0:09:07.920 --> 0:09:12.280 But yeah, so, well, good for him, and I hope 0:09:12.320 --> 0:09:16.280 he comes out without any brain damage. And how is 0:09:16.320 --> 0:09:18.240 he doing? The computer thing? By the way, does it 0:09:18.280 --> 0:09:19.920 talk to him or something to it? Yeah? 0:09:20.000 --> 0:09:20.959 Yeah, it talks to him. 0:09:21.520 --> 0:09:26.040 Yeah, so it's basically chat JPT. Yeah. 0:09:26.240 --> 0:09:29.280 Yeah. It just always makes me think when you interact 0:09:29.280 --> 0:09:32.200 with people. That always makes me think about everything we 0:09:32.280 --> 0:09:34.480 take for granted, which sounds a cliche, but you know, 0:09:34.559 --> 0:09:36.800 I jump in the car and I drive home, and 0:09:37.280 --> 0:09:40.079 then I think about he had to get a taxi there, 0:09:40.080 --> 0:09:42.160 and you get to taxi back, and then I've got 0:09:42.200 --> 0:09:45.120 to I'm sending him some photos and he'll never get 0:09:45.120 --> 0:09:46.960 to see those photos. He's going to put it on 0:09:47.000 --> 0:09:50.360 social media, and like, so he's in this same world 0:09:50.440 --> 0:09:54.960 we're living in, and his world is so different. Yes, 0:09:55.280 --> 0:09:57.840 And we don't build it, and not just for blind people, 0:09:57.880 --> 0:09:59.440 for all sorts of people. We don't build it for 0:09:59.480 --> 0:10:00.000 everyone else. 0:10:02.320 --> 0:10:07.160 Yeah, it's it's yeah, I don't built for people who 0:10:07.440 --> 0:10:12.240 aren't in you know, in inverted commas typical. I guess you. 0:10:12.160 --> 0:10:15.680 Know you're really inspired by you know, that's two blind 0:10:15.720 --> 0:10:18.720 people I've been involved with now that are doing like 0:10:19.200 --> 0:10:25.120 crazy stuff despite their limitation, like we had Ben felt 0:10:25.160 --> 0:10:27.920 both Ben's by the way, Ben Felton, who wanted to 0:10:27.960 --> 0:10:30.600 be the fastest motor man on a motorcycle and ride 0:10:30.600 --> 0:10:33.680 a motorcycle fastest blind man. Sorry, And it's just like, 0:10:33.800 --> 0:10:38.199 I think that's so inspiring when people because people like that, 0:10:38.360 --> 0:10:41.600 just I think of them often and go, well, if 0:10:41.640 --> 0:10:44.560 they can, Yeah, isn't it funny? 0:10:44.600 --> 0:10:48.320 Though? The number of people Tiffany and Cook who have 0:10:49.200 --> 0:10:55.240 a disability and or they don't have a disability, then 0:10:55.280 --> 0:10:58.280 something happens, then they get a disability, or they acquire 0:10:58.480 --> 0:11:00.840 whatever it is, and then all of a sudden they 0:11:00.920 --> 0:11:04.360 start doing all this amazing shit when they've actually got 0:11:04.720 --> 0:11:07.400 less capacity than they had before the injury or the 0:11:07.440 --> 0:11:11.000 accident or the illness, but now they're doing ten times 0:11:11.000 --> 0:11:13.920 more than they ever did. And it's not because all 0:11:13.920 --> 0:11:16.320 of a sudden they've got more talent or more physical 0:11:16.320 --> 0:11:19.479 ability or but it's because they've got a totally different mindset. 0:11:20.360 --> 0:11:23.920 And isn't it a pity that so many of us 0:11:24.000 --> 0:11:28.400 wait until something fucking diabolical happens before we think, oh, geez, 0:11:28.440 --> 0:11:32.120 I wonder what I could do. I wonder how much 0:11:32.840 --> 0:11:36.080 progress or what I could achieve if I just fucking 0:11:36.880 --> 0:11:39.679 let go of all the bullshit and dive in. And 0:11:40.160 --> 0:11:43.280 if I fail, I fail. If I win, If it's painful, 0:11:43.320 --> 0:11:46.120 it's painful. If it's good, it's good. But it's like 0:11:46.960 --> 0:11:49.839 it seems, and I'm generalizing, but it seems that a 0:11:49.880 --> 0:11:52.400 lot of people who end up in a situation that 0:11:52.480 --> 0:11:55.520 they didn't choose or want, some of them become almost 0:11:55.559 --> 0:11:59.240 fucking superhuman because I don't know why, like the fear 0:11:59.320 --> 0:12:02.320 goes or the maybe it's just that we have a 0:12:02.360 --> 0:12:04.959 shift or they have a shift in awareness or perspective 0:12:05.000 --> 0:12:07.240 and go, oh fucking hell, I'm not here for a 0:12:07.240 --> 0:12:09.400 long time. I'm here for a good time. Why don't 0:12:09.400 --> 0:12:10.280 I fucking jump in? 0:12:12.679 --> 0:12:17.360 I think I think about that heaps in terms of 0:12:20.320 --> 0:12:23.320 all the answers that we're all seeking, Like we're learning 0:12:23.320 --> 0:12:26.680 and we're seeking, and we're evolving, and we're trying to 0:12:26.760 --> 0:12:30.400 grasp this thing like it's all still, like life is 0:12:30.480 --> 0:12:33.199 still and the answers of this thing, and then I'll 0:12:33.240 --> 0:12:36.040 apply them. And by the time I apply them, by 0:12:36.080 --> 0:12:39.480 the time you start to apply something, you've already changed. Yeah, 0:12:39.600 --> 0:12:43.200 I'm notnting the same person with the same circumstances or 0:12:43.200 --> 0:12:46.200 emotions or feelings or maybe even values. 0:12:46.800 --> 0:12:50.480 Yeah, And the thing that is really important to you 0:12:50.559 --> 0:12:54.400 when you're let's just say twenty, might be completely irrelevant 0:12:54.440 --> 0:12:58.040 when you're thirty, yeah, or when you're forty two year 0:12:58.080 --> 0:13:00.600 old Tiff and you go, fuck, you know what I want? 0:13:00.640 --> 0:13:02.520 I want this, and then you work your ass off 0:13:02.520 --> 0:13:05.480 and you get it and you go, ah, I don't know, 0:13:05.520 --> 0:13:08.640 maybe that wasn't it, or maybe or maybe that's nirvana 0:13:08.840 --> 0:13:10.440 or you know, it's the old You get to the 0:13:10.440 --> 0:13:12.320 top of the mountain and you're like, mah, fuck, I 0:13:12.360 --> 0:13:15.079 climbed the wrong mountain or this is good, but oh, 0:13:15.120 --> 0:13:17.880 look at that mountain over there. Then you climb that one, 0:13:17.920 --> 0:13:20.000 you're like, this is a bit better, but fuck, look 0:13:20.040 --> 0:13:23.640 at that. And you know, because I think, like, we 0:13:23.760 --> 0:13:26.160 grow up and I know we've spoken about this before, 0:13:26.160 --> 0:13:28.360 but we grow up in this kind of model of 0:13:28.440 --> 0:13:32.400 thinking that says successes about external things. And so when 0:13:32.480 --> 0:13:35.000 you get that thing or change that thing, or own 0:13:35.080 --> 0:13:38.559 that thing, or people can see that trophy or see 0:13:38.559 --> 0:13:42.360 how many followers Craig's got or Tiff scots or or 0:13:42.600 --> 0:13:46.680 you know, Craig's biceps or TIFF's fucking whatever, whatever it is, right, 0:13:47.600 --> 0:13:49.520 and then you achieve it or create it or do 0:13:49.600 --> 0:13:52.720 it or change it, and then you're like, oh, I'm 0:13:52.720 --> 0:13:56.240 still a bit sad. I'm still a bit I've still 0:13:56.240 --> 0:13:58.839 got shit self esteem, or I'm still overthinking, or I'm 0:13:58.880 --> 0:14:02.280 still i still feel like there's some kind of emotional 0:14:02.320 --> 0:14:07.160 and or psychological whole, or I feel disconnected, or and 0:14:07.200 --> 0:14:10.240 then I go, oh, maybe it's maybe I need to 0:14:10.280 --> 0:14:12.560 be more jacked, or maybe I need a bigger house, 0:14:12.640 --> 0:14:15.640 or you know, it's like we have these stories that 0:14:15.640 --> 0:14:21.120 these external things are going to create these internal outcomes 0:14:21.160 --> 0:14:23.040 that I don't think they generally do. 0:14:24.560 --> 0:14:27.200 I've been thinking about it heaps lately, and I feel 0:14:27.240 --> 0:14:30.920 like with a lot of the people I'm around and 0:14:30.960 --> 0:14:37.800 having conversations with are in this state of busyness and 0:14:38.120 --> 0:14:40.640 a bit burnout. So I'm having a lots of conversations 0:14:40.640 --> 0:14:45.840 around that. And because I've made such a massive overdue 0:14:45.880 --> 0:14:49.480 effort in stopping that myself, because I'm just a product 0:14:49.520 --> 0:14:51.920 of that of working seven days a week for god 0:14:52.000 --> 0:14:56.720 knows how many years now seven days, and you know, 0:14:56.840 --> 0:15:00.280 always happening to happening that word again, always having to. 0:15:00.320 --> 0:15:06.520 Drive it's bad happening, khuf e n happening. 0:15:07.840 --> 0:15:10.000 Thanks for drawing my attention to that and never always 0:15:10.040 --> 0:15:10.960 said it. 0:15:11.000 --> 0:15:14.040 All words have got to start somewhere, So let's go. 0:15:14.120 --> 0:15:17.760 It's twenty twenty five, it's sixteenth of April. Let's push 0:15:17.760 --> 0:15:21.280 that motherfucker out of the literary nest and we'll accredit it, 0:15:21.400 --> 0:15:26.520 will credit it to you. Tea cook happening. That's now, 0:15:26.640 --> 0:15:31.760 it's a thing. Now, it's it. It's a word. It's like, 0:15:31.920 --> 0:15:33.320 it's right up there with somethink. 0:15:35.560 --> 0:15:39.520 Well, it's a real tazzy word, somethin somethink. Just ask 0:15:39.640 --> 0:15:43.520 my friends, just asks, Yeah, just. 0:15:43.800 --> 0:15:47.960 Ask my friend about something. And if you don't, it 0:15:47.960 --> 0:15:48.440 won't be. 0:15:48.440 --> 0:15:55.760 Happening anyway anyway. So I'm really conscious, and I'm really 0:15:55.840 --> 0:15:59.280 conscious of the people around me that might still be 0:15:59.400 --> 0:16:02.440 having the conversations I was, or you know, wearing the 0:16:02.480 --> 0:16:05.760 busy badge or oh it's really busy or stressing or 0:16:05.800 --> 0:16:09.120 frantic for a couple of people that have come up 0:16:09.160 --> 0:16:14.120 against healthy issues in the middle of that, and watching 0:16:14.640 --> 0:16:19.160 how hard it is to still make the choice and 0:16:19.240 --> 0:16:22.600 realize that, like to pull yourself out of that, out 0:16:22.600 --> 0:16:25.800 of it. I've got to I'm busy. I've got to 0:16:25.800 --> 0:16:28.040 make more money, I've got to do more things. I've 0:16:28.080 --> 0:16:30.480 got to produce, you know, Like I get it because 0:16:30.520 --> 0:16:35.040 I feel in me what drives me towards that. But 0:16:35.080 --> 0:16:38.480 there's the experience of something, and then there's the knowledge 0:16:39.440 --> 0:16:42.760 of wanting of that not really being a reality, it's 0:16:42.840 --> 0:16:45.120 just a story. And then there's the trying to move 0:16:45.160 --> 0:16:48.560 yourself to live a little bit differently, and it takes time. 0:16:48.720 --> 0:16:53.880 Yeah, yeah, yeah, And I think it's also part of 0:16:53.880 --> 0:16:59.360 it is about getting there's so many facets diss but 0:16:59.400 --> 0:17:01.800 getting clear about what you want and what you don't want, 0:17:01.840 --> 0:17:03.640 and why you want that thing and why you don't 0:17:03.680 --> 0:17:08.680 want that other thing. Right, And I've had a lot 0:17:08.680 --> 0:17:12.360 of conversations lately with people about and I know we're 0:17:12.359 --> 0:17:15.919 revisiting this old chestnut, but metacognition, you know, thinking about 0:17:15.960 --> 0:17:19.840 how I think and how you think and all of 0:17:19.880 --> 0:17:27.240 that stuff, like starting to become aware of the so 0:17:27.359 --> 0:17:31.320 many people at the moment are so fucking emotional about 0:17:31.359 --> 0:17:36.440 what they think about Donald Trump, or what they think 0:17:36.480 --> 0:17:40.200 about Anthony Albanuzi, or what they think about the Carnival 0:17:40.320 --> 0:17:44.320 diet or what they think. And it's like, I understand 0:17:44.359 --> 0:17:46.399 that you don't think like me or agree with me, 0:17:46.640 --> 0:17:48.640 or you do agree and you do you know, either 0:17:48.680 --> 0:17:52.280 way all good? But do we have to hate everyone 0:17:52.280 --> 0:17:54.960 who doesn't think like us? Do we have to call 0:17:55.000 --> 0:17:58.720 everyone a fuck with that likes Donald Trump or hates 0:17:58.800 --> 0:18:01.800 Donald Trump? Or do we do we have to like 0:18:01.840 --> 0:18:04.880 do we need to be so vitriolic and so nasty? 0:18:05.040 --> 0:18:08.160 Does it and by the way, does it move the needle? 0:18:08.200 --> 0:18:10.760 Does it help? Does it improve anything? Is it creating 0:18:10.800 --> 0:18:15.160 good outcomes? Is making people feel better or do better? 0:18:15.800 --> 0:18:19.600 Like it's I understand there's always going to be divergence 0:18:19.640 --> 0:18:22.520 of opinion and idea and belief in philosophy and behavior, 0:18:22.920 --> 0:18:27.000 of course, but it's like, Okay, you're a Muslim, I'm 0:18:27.000 --> 0:18:30.919 an atheist, tips a Catholic, old mates, a Buddhist or 0:18:30.920 --> 0:18:33.840 whatever whatever it is. Hey, let's all have dinner and 0:18:33.880 --> 0:18:35.879 not talk about any of that shit and let's just 0:18:35.960 --> 0:18:40.159 hang out like or let you know. It's like, we 0:18:40.240 --> 0:18:44.600 don't need to try to convince other people that what 0:18:44.640 --> 0:18:47.520 we think is the thing that everybody should think. But 0:18:47.560 --> 0:18:51.720 that seems to be a lot of what happens on 0:18:52.800 --> 0:18:57.679 in some areas of social media, where it's just people 0:18:57.760 --> 0:19:01.000 screaming at each other who all have a different opinion. 0:19:01.040 --> 0:19:02.879 You know, I did that. I think I might have 0:19:02.960 --> 0:19:05.200 even done it with you that on the Fence episode 0:19:05.240 --> 0:19:08.399 a while ago, we're talking about the beauty of like, 0:19:08.720 --> 0:19:10.280 you know, people tell you you've got to get off 0:19:10.280 --> 0:19:13.640 the fence. I'm like, no, you don't, because what they're 0:19:13.680 --> 0:19:15.680 saying is you need to pick a side. Well, fuck 0:19:15.720 --> 0:19:17.600 your sides. I don't want to be on a side 0:19:18.680 --> 0:19:20.040 because I don't want to be in your group. I 0:19:20.080 --> 0:19:21.359 don't want to be in their group. I don't want 0:19:21.359 --> 0:19:23.320 to be in a fucking group. I want to just 0:19:23.320 --> 0:19:26.639 think for myself and if it happens to align with 0:19:26.680 --> 0:19:28.720 what you think or they think, that's cool. But I'm 0:19:28.760 --> 0:19:32.000 still not in a group with you, because the problem 0:19:32.080 --> 0:19:37.680 is that once we are in these groups, these philosophical, religious, nutritional, political, 0:19:38.320 --> 0:19:42.320 sociological groups, whatever, now you're part of the group. Now 0:19:42.359 --> 0:19:44.600 you need to align with the group. To stay in 0:19:44.640 --> 0:19:47.840 the group, which means you have this drive to belong 0:19:47.880 --> 0:19:52.080 and this drive to align. So now you can't be 0:19:52.160 --> 0:19:55.440 critical of anything, which means you can't think critically because 0:19:55.840 --> 0:19:58.439 you are more interested in staying a member of the 0:19:58.480 --> 0:20:02.399 group than actually telling people or actually being true to 0:20:02.440 --> 0:20:06.719 your own thinking and ability to critically decide or what 0:20:06.920 --> 0:20:09.360 is or isn't for you. Now, there are many things 0:20:09.440 --> 0:20:11.720 that I think like, I might be in the middle 0:20:11.760 --> 0:20:14.040 of a situation where people are talking about something that 0:20:14.080 --> 0:20:17.360 I think is bullshit, and I won't nod my head 0:20:17.359 --> 0:20:19.920 and agree with them. But I have enough awareness and 0:20:20.520 --> 0:20:23.920 social intelligence to know that if in the middle of 0:20:23.960 --> 0:20:25.920 all of this, I go, I think you're all full 0:20:25.920 --> 0:20:28.040 of shit. I think you're wrong. This is what I 0:20:28.080 --> 0:20:31.199 think is right, and that may be what I'm thinking, 0:20:31.240 --> 0:20:34.440 but I'm definitely not going to say that, not because 0:20:35.359 --> 0:20:39.760 I'm scared, but because it won't help. It won't change anything. 0:20:40.240 --> 0:20:44.640 Nobody's going to go Nobody who thinks something diametrically opposed 0:20:44.640 --> 0:20:47.280 to me is going to go, Oh, that's the really 0:20:47.320 --> 0:20:49.840 good point, Craig, I am wrong. Thanks for pointing that 0:20:49.920 --> 0:20:54.320 out right. It doesn't happen. And by the way, I 0:20:54.359 --> 0:20:56.840 don't know that I'm right. I just have a different 0:20:56.880 --> 0:21:02.040 opinion to you and this idea that or this, uh 0:21:02.880 --> 0:21:08.439 what's the word this in lack of capacity for people 0:21:08.560 --> 0:21:12.600 to be able to go Look, I really think this, 0:21:12.720 --> 0:21:15.320 but I could be wrong, Like people seem to have 0:21:15.359 --> 0:21:19.480 an aversion to no, fuck you and fuck that group 0:21:19.560 --> 0:21:22.720 and where it's like, geez, do you not? I get 0:21:22.760 --> 0:21:25.680 shit wrong all the time, and I'm and I think 0:21:25.720 --> 0:21:28.400 about this stuff a lot, and I'm mildly educated. I'm 0:21:28.440 --> 0:21:31.320 mildly I do a lot of research and thinking and exploring, 0:21:31.800 --> 0:21:36.240 and I still get half the shit wrong. So why 0:21:36.280 --> 0:21:38.960 do you think you couldn't be wrong? And this is 0:21:39.040 --> 0:21:42.080 the problem, is that that you get all of these 0:21:42.119 --> 0:21:45.400 echo chambers where everyone whatever it is, they think there. 0:21:45.440 --> 0:21:47.480 I don't even know if I've answered your question. I've 0:21:47.480 --> 0:21:52.200 completely diverted the conversation. I'm aware, But to me, that's 0:21:52.320 --> 0:21:54.600 just it's a bit sad. It's a bit sad that 0:21:54.640 --> 0:21:58.520 we think we're the smartest species, but we're so fucking 0:21:58.680 --> 0:22:01.879 stupid and ignorant so much of the time, and we 0:22:02.000 --> 0:22:05.199 do so much that hurts so many people, and we 0:22:05.280 --> 0:22:08.080 can't just and I know this sounds naf and I 0:22:08.119 --> 0:22:10.840 know it's never going to happen, but imagine if people 0:22:10.880 --> 0:22:14.960 were just more concerned with being loving and kind. Doesn't 0:22:14.960 --> 0:22:18.560 mean to everyone all the time, but just where you went, like, 0:22:18.680 --> 0:22:23.120 I just met with this Should I say? It doesn't matter, 0:22:23.200 --> 0:22:25.000 I just I won't say, but I just met with 0:22:25.040 --> 0:22:27.840 this person who needed some help. Literally, I came straight. 0:22:27.920 --> 0:22:31.280 I left the cafe at twenty two past one, and 0:22:31.320 --> 0:22:34.840 you and I were on it half past one. And 0:22:35.200 --> 0:22:37.719 at the end it was someone who asked for and 0:22:37.760 --> 0:22:39.960 I can't be everything for everyone, so please don't send 0:22:39.960 --> 0:22:42.159 me an email. But they said what do I owe you? 0:22:42.200 --> 0:22:44.000 And I went nothing, and I'm like, it's all good, 0:22:44.040 --> 0:22:46.760 and they they're like, why would you do that? And 0:22:46.800 --> 0:22:50.080 I literally go, because I've got some skills and knowledge 0:22:50.119 --> 0:22:52.959 that you need and you need help. And they're like, 0:22:53.040 --> 0:22:55.480 I do, but but why would you do it for nothing? 0:22:56.320 --> 0:23:00.520 And I'm like, it's kind of sad that people blown 0:23:00.560 --> 0:23:03.360 away when someone would genuinely just help them where there's 0:23:03.359 --> 0:23:09.520 no hook, catch agenda, it's not strategic. And I go because, well, one, 0:23:09.560 --> 0:23:11.520