WEBVTT - Danni Brooke On What It Takes To Be An Undercover Cop 0:00:00.280 --> 0:00:04.560 This episode of Headgame was recorded on gaddigal Land. This 0:00:04.680 --> 0:00:08.840 episode contains discussions of sexual assault. If this raises any 0:00:08.880 --> 0:00:11.760 issues for you, support is available through the links and 0:00:11.840 --> 0:00:13.400 phone numbers in the show notes. 0:00:15.040 --> 0:00:17.400 It's a chilly day in London as a young girl 0:00:17.480 --> 0:00:21.160 stands waiting for the bus, dressed in a plaid skirt 0:00:21.320 --> 0:00:24.000 over the knee, socks and blazer. She appears to be 0:00:24.040 --> 0:00:29.120 a local schoolgirl to most passers by. In reality, the 0:00:29.160 --> 0:00:32.760 innocent looking teen is twenty nine year old undercover police 0:00:32.760 --> 0:00:36.600 officer Danny Brook. She's in her tenth year with the 0:00:36.640 --> 0:00:41.599 Metropolitan Police. Today she's part of a sting hunting a 0:00:41.600 --> 0:00:44.839 predator accused of more than one hundred assaults on children. 0:00:45.960 --> 0:00:48.920 Just as Danny receives a call that the operation is 0:00:48.960 --> 0:00:52.519 being aborted, she's grabbed from behind and thrown to the ground. 0:00:53.720 --> 0:00:57.840 A convicted sex offender overpowers Danny and exposes himself. 0:00:58.720 --> 0:00:59.720 Back up swoops in. 0:01:02.240 --> 0:01:05.319 Danny would soon leave the force after putting her life 0:01:05.360 --> 0:01:12.160 in jeopardy day after day. I'm Att Middleton and this 0:01:12.400 --> 0:01:15.520 is head Game Today. What it takes to live a 0:01:15.560 --> 0:01:22.679 double life from former undercover officer Danny Brook. Danny Brook 0:01:23.120 --> 0:01:25.959 is a former undercover police officer, which we're going to 0:01:26.040 --> 0:01:30.039 dive into in a second, but also now known for 0:01:30.800 --> 0:01:32.640 the Channel four series Hunted. 0:01:33.160 --> 0:01:35.360 So Danny is great to have you on. How are you. 0:01:35.600 --> 0:01:38.520 I'm good, Thank you for having me. It's a pleasure 0:01:38.560 --> 0:01:39.040 to be here. 0:01:39.600 --> 0:01:45.839 Now, Danny, let's go back to your younger days. What 0:01:46.360 --> 0:01:49.320 enticed you to become a police officer. What is your 0:01:49.320 --> 0:01:52.760 family life like? Were you surrounded with police officers? Is 0:01:52.760 --> 0:01:55.440 that run in the family? How does that look? 0:01:56.160 --> 0:01:58.720 It's a bit of a weird one. Actually, where I 0:01:58.760 --> 0:02:00.480 grew up. I grew up. I was born in a London, 0:02:00.640 --> 0:02:03.080 which obviously police are not. You don't join the police 0:02:03.240 --> 0:02:06.680 fIF from East London. We grew up in Essex. Again, 0:02:06.720 --> 0:02:08.640 you don't join the police if you grew up in Essex. 0:02:09.800 --> 0:02:12.440 My mom's found. My mom's one or thirteen, so she's 0:02:12.480 --> 0:02:15.480 got thirteen siblings, she's the youngest and they were of 0:02:15.520 --> 0:02:19.160 Sicilian descent. Now that also doesn't bode well with policing. 0:02:19.160 --> 0:02:23.000 They police themselves, they're very protective. So yeah, it definitely 0:02:23.000 --> 0:02:25.880 wasn't from my mom's side at all. But my dad 0:02:25.919 --> 0:02:28.600 was a police officer. Again, when that doesn't bode well. 0:02:28.680 --> 0:02:31.880 So when my parents got together. My family weren't happy 0:02:31.919 --> 0:02:32.399 about it. 0:02:32.720 --> 0:02:34.760 Oh was it obvious friction from the beginning. 0:02:35.200 --> 0:02:38.800 Did your your side accept or do they still not 0:02:38.919 --> 0:02:40.360 accept my dad? 0:02:40.480 --> 0:02:43.480 No, they definitely didn't accept it. You know, the divorce 0:02:43.639 --> 0:02:45.840 was a shotgun divorce. It was like they only got 0:02:45.880 --> 0:02:49.360 married because she was pregnant with me, basically, and they 0:02:49.360 --> 0:02:51.080 got married. It was just obviously not meant to be. 0:02:51.160 --> 0:02:54.200 From different worlds. My dad was privately educated boarding school, 0:02:54.400 --> 0:02:58.080 you know, East London. It just doesn't go, is. 0:02:58.280 --> 0:02:59.560 You know what? It doesn't does it? 0:02:59.760 --> 0:02:59.880 Now? 0:03:00.080 --> 0:03:00.560 You said it? 0:03:00.600 --> 0:03:03.280 And me being a Britain coming from you know, I 0:03:03.320 --> 0:03:06.400 was brought up in North London. My father was from Enfield, 0:03:06.480 --> 0:03:09.080 my mother was from Portsmouth. So I know exactly what 0:03:09.120 --> 0:03:09.600 you're saying. 0:03:10.120 --> 0:03:12.560 Yeah, it's just a bit. Yeah, it doesn't go. But 0:03:12.600 --> 0:03:14.919 being the youngest of my my mom was the youngest 0:03:14.919 --> 0:03:17.280 and being her eldest, girls hadn't been born in our 0:03:17.320 --> 0:03:20.240 family for ages, for generations and years, So I was 0:03:20.240 --> 0:03:22.239 a bit of a I sound awful saying it, but 0:03:22.280 --> 0:03:24.040 a little bit of a princess when I was smaller. 0:03:25.040 --> 0:03:26.880 So they kind of relented when I said I was 0:03:26.960 --> 0:03:29.480 joining They weren't overly happy about it, but they because 0:03:29.480 --> 0:03:31.160 I wanted to be a defense barrister, which would have 0:03:31.160 --> 0:03:35.080 made them very happy. But it didn't work out that way. 0:03:35.080 --> 0:03:36.880 I thought I was going to live and whopping, wearing 0:03:36.920 --> 0:03:39.440 power suits and driving a sports car, but it didn't happen. 0:03:39.640 --> 0:03:41.040 Was it a sliding doors moment? 0:03:41.560 --> 0:03:45.120 Or was your decision to become a police a police 0:03:45.120 --> 0:03:48.400 officer quite sealed from a younger age? 0:03:49.000 --> 0:03:51.119 God? No, I was literally I did A levels, which 0:03:51.120 --> 0:03:53.560 again is surprising for someone like me. I did my 0:03:53.640 --> 0:03:58.120 A levels and applied for university and was told there's 0:03:58.480 --> 0:04:00.320 an opening, and the police for women got doing a 0:04:00.320 --> 0:04:02.520 big recruitment drive and my dad said, I think you 0:04:02.520 --> 0:04:03.160 should give it a go. 0:04:03.920 --> 0:04:05.880 And what, Danny, what gave you the drive and ambition 0:04:06.000 --> 0:04:10.400 to want to educate yourself, to want to go to UNI? 0:04:10.520 --> 0:04:12.840 To be this driven individual from such a young age, 0:04:12.880 --> 0:04:15.840 Because normally when you're I don't want to you know, 0:04:16.160 --> 0:04:18.160 put everyone in the same category here. But normally when 0:04:18.160 --> 0:04:20.800 you come you know from that sort of background, you 0:04:20.839 --> 0:04:23.359 know those things aren't really on the cards, aren't there? 0:04:23.360 --> 0:04:25.000 You don't think right? I want to go to get 0:04:25.120 --> 0:04:25.600 you go. 0:04:25.520 --> 0:04:28.359 To college, go to university, and to get a degree 0:04:28.440 --> 0:04:31.120 or get a qualification, whatever you're sort of thrust. 0:04:31.520 --> 0:04:33.560 What forced you to take a different route. 0:04:33.600 --> 0:04:36.680 Was there a moment that that happened or was it 0:04:36.800 --> 0:04:38.640 just something that you just always wanted to do. 0:04:39.600 --> 0:04:41.960 I just always wanted a bit more, you know. I 0:04:41.960 --> 0:04:44.200 had an arty that I was closed with, and she's 0:04:44.200 --> 0:04:45.640 so funny because we say these things and you will 0:04:45.680 --> 0:04:47.680 know exactly what I mean. But my family would say 0:04:47.720 --> 0:04:50.480 go up London, but we were in London, but if 0:04:50.520 --> 0:04:52.520 they didn't go to the West End. Yeah, yeah, my 0:04:52.560 --> 0:04:54.599 Auntie would take me to the West End, like shopping 0:04:54.600 --> 0:04:56.520 and stuff. And I used to like, obviously you'd see 0:04:56.520 --> 0:04:59.240 people walking around with at that point, it was material 0:04:59.279 --> 0:05:01.960 things because you're young, you don't understand it. But I'd 0:05:02.000 --> 0:05:04.680 see like ladies with like nice hair and like nice nails, 0:05:04.680 --> 0:05:06.480 and then like a handbag, and I'd think, I really 0:05:06.480 --> 0:05:09.520 want that when I'm older. And I was really fortunate 0:05:09.600 --> 0:05:10.960 then my family let me travel a lot when I 0:05:11.040 --> 0:05:13.599 was younger, so I'd seen different things. But I just 0:05:13.640 --> 0:05:16.000 didn't want to be a housewife. I didn't know there's 0:05:16.000 --> 0:05:17.880 anything wrong with that. It just isn't for me. 0:05:18.200 --> 0:05:20.479 Yeah, And probably you're surrounded by it and like you said, 0:05:20.480 --> 0:05:22.640 you just wanted more, you wanted you know, you wanted 0:05:22.680 --> 0:05:26.400 something different, and then you found yourself. 0:05:27.200 --> 0:05:28.480 Did you go to UNI? Did you say? 0:05:29.120 --> 0:05:31.560 No? I didn't go because I got a police offer, 0:05:31.720 --> 0:05:33.920 so I didn't go. But if I hadn't got the 0:05:33.920 --> 0:05:35.360 police offer, I would have gone to UNI. 0:05:36.080 --> 0:05:38.880 How did the police offer sort of work? So can 0:05:38.920 --> 0:05:40.640 you remember that there? When you thought, do you know what, 0:05:40.880 --> 0:05:42.320 I'm going to give this a crack? 0:05:42.680 --> 0:05:44.840 I think it was it was my dad saying, oh, 0:05:44.839 --> 0:05:47.160 there's an opportunity, and I said, well, you're gonna have 0:05:47.200 --> 0:05:49.520 to help me with that application, because like it was 0:05:49.600 --> 0:05:53.279 just massive and ridiculous. And then he helped me with 0:05:53.320 --> 0:05:56.039 the application. And then I got a phone call saying, 0:05:56.200 --> 0:05:58.960 we've got a last minute appointment for an interview because 0:05:58.960 --> 0:06:00.360 there was a bad, massive battler. It was a two 0:06:00.440 --> 0:06:04.000 year waiting list, massive backlog, would like to interview you. 0:06:04.040 --> 0:06:08.240 And I thought great, went for the interview and I 0:06:08.240 --> 0:06:09.760 don't even know how I got through it. There was 0:06:10.120 --> 0:06:11.800 the interviews, a face to face into your chat, and 0:06:11.800 --> 0:06:13.880 then there's a loads of tests, so you do a 0:06:13.880 --> 0:06:16.240 maths test and observation test. But I just loved it. 0:06:16.279 --> 0:06:20.200 I just thought it was so cool. And then about 0:06:20.279 --> 0:06:21.880 literally a few weeks after that, I got another phone 0:06:21.920 --> 0:06:26.200 call saying congratulations with someone not shown up. Would you 0:06:26.240 --> 0:06:28.960 like to start tomorrow morning at Hendon? And I said yes, 0:06:29.400 --> 0:06:32.760 And that was it. I had no preparation, nothing, nothing. 0:06:33.040 --> 0:06:35.840 You got so someone didn't turn up for that because 0:06:35.839 --> 0:06:39.320 it's it's the two week cycles or something four week cycles. 0:06:39.360 --> 0:06:40.960 Where did you stay at Hendon? 0:06:41.000 --> 0:06:42.919 Because I don't know if that if they can do 0:06:42.960 --> 0:06:45.400 that now, but you you stay in the accommodation there 0:06:45.720 --> 0:06:45.880 was it. 0:06:45.880 --> 0:06:47.480 It's an eighteen week program. 0:06:47.560 --> 0:06:50.440 Is it that you go for eighteen weeks? Yeah? You 0:06:50.480 --> 0:06:52.840 lived there eighteen weeks. It's absolutely brilliant. I had the 0:06:52.880 --> 0:06:54.560 best time of my life because I've never had known 0:06:54.600 --> 0:06:55.920 it was like that before. 0:06:55.760 --> 0:06:57.920 In two thousand and that. 0:06:57.920 --> 0:06:59.599 Was the beginning of two thousand and three. 0:07:00.360 --> 0:07:03.040 Wow, was there a sense of pride that you're representing 0:07:03.080 --> 0:07:03.800 your dad as well? 0:07:04.600 --> 0:07:06.839 Yeah? He was so cute. He actually took me to 0:07:06.880 --> 0:07:08.760 all my exams, he took me to all my interviews, 0:07:08.839 --> 0:07:11.560 dropped me off at Hendon. He was so sweet, he 0:07:11.640 --> 0:07:13.160 was so excited. He was like, oh, I had the 0:07:13.160 --> 0:07:15.640 best time when I was here, And I was like thinking, 0:07:15.680 --> 0:07:17.880 I've never stayed away from home for that long before. 0:07:18.600 --> 0:07:20.760 But yeah, it was excellent. It was just in my 0:07:20.800 --> 0:07:22.480 head that's what UNI would be like. I mean, the 0:07:22.520 --> 0:07:26.360 downs were awful, but you don't care because everyone's in 0:07:26.400 --> 0:07:28.720 the same position, so you don't care. Yeah, the downs 0:07:28.760 --> 0:07:32.160 were horrendous, but we had a subsidized bar and it 0:07:32.240 --> 0:07:32.720 was brilliant. 0:07:33.520 --> 0:07:34.360 Do you know what? That's it? 0:07:34.440 --> 0:07:36.440 What you need, you need just to drink at the 0:07:36.480 --> 0:07:38.080 end of the day to get you through. 0:07:38.120 --> 0:07:40.840 But so Hendon took me through Hendon. 0:07:41.280 --> 0:07:43.679 It's quite intense, right you go there, you're eighteen weeks, 0:07:43.680 --> 0:07:47.160 you're living on site, you're ultimately it's a bit like 0:07:47.280 --> 0:07:50.880 a military process. You're living and breathing to become to 0:07:50.920 --> 0:07:52.080 become a police officer. 0:07:52.640 --> 0:07:53.600 What was the training like? 0:07:54.680 --> 0:07:57.760 It's intense because again I've only done at that point, 0:07:57.800 --> 0:07:59.160 only done a level was where you just go to 0:07:59.160 --> 0:08:01.120 your lesson, you're spoken that for a couple of hours 0:08:01.160 --> 0:08:03.400 and then go home do your homework. But this was 0:08:03.400 --> 0:08:06.880 intense because you're learning law and you're not learning all 0:08:06.920 --> 0:08:08.520 of it either, of course, cause eighteen weeks it's not 0:08:08.600 --> 0:08:11.560 enough time. But that side of it was difficult and 0:08:11.800 --> 0:08:14.080 I found it really a lot because I really had 0:08:14.120 --> 0:08:16.760 to study for it. But I made friends there I'm 0:08:16.760 --> 0:08:19.520 still friends with today, Like they're my best friends. Because 0:08:19.520 --> 0:08:22.520 you just Gael with a couple of people. They used 0:08:22.560 --> 0:08:24.680 to call us the three Witches. There was me and 0:08:24.720 --> 0:08:27.480 two girls and apparently when one of us would laugh, 0:08:27.560 --> 0:08:30.240 we'd all start tackling and we just we had the 0:08:30.240 --> 0:08:33.320 best time. Like we had so much banter, like it. 0:08:33.200 --> 0:08:34.880 Was just three witches. 0:08:35.200 --> 0:08:37.120 Yeah, they people hated I said. To see us coming, 0:08:37.160 --> 0:08:38.680 I'd be like, oh not memory. 0:08:38.520 --> 0:08:40.640 Oh no, here we go, do you know what? 0:08:40.679 --> 0:08:43.200 But that's what it's all about, right, And and for 0:08:43.240 --> 0:08:46.280 someone like yourself who wants stands the process, that banter 0:08:46.480 --> 0:08:49.520 is super important. It's almost like an acceptance, you know, 0:08:50.080 --> 0:08:52.920 into a clan, into a group, into an organization and 0:08:52.960 --> 0:08:54.959 your you guys were were there to. 0:08:55.000 --> 0:08:58.800 Obviously uphold law and order? What Bara did? 0:08:58.840 --> 0:08:59.199 Were you? 0:08:59.600 --> 0:09:00.560 Were you signed to you? 0:09:01.280 --> 0:09:03.240 Well, this is another funny thing. So my family are 0:09:03.160 --> 0:09:05.800 all from Tower Hamlets. I was born in my end 0:09:06.520 --> 0:09:08.880 and I went to Tower Hamlets, which was a really 0:09:08.880 --> 0:09:09.520 great idea. 0:09:10.000 --> 0:09:13.360 Oh no, you're walking around like that. I know you, 0:09:13.559 --> 0:09:16.319 I know you, I know you. Wow. 0:09:16.480 --> 0:09:18.240 Yeah, if I had a pound for every time I 0:09:18.240 --> 0:09:20.160 walked into custody and saw someone I knew that was 0:09:20.160 --> 0:09:22.200 sat there in handcuffs, I would not I could have 0:09:22.240 --> 0:09:24.040 left the police early. It would have been and. 0:09:24.040 --> 0:09:27.400 They're like, hey, Danny, how what are you doing here? 0:09:28.120 --> 0:09:31.200 What are you doing here again? Yeah, don't talk to me, 0:09:31.320 --> 0:09:32.200 Shy away from me. 0:09:32.360 --> 0:09:34.520 But it was a good burrough because you've got crazy 0:09:34.600 --> 0:09:37.160 money in Canary Wharf, like super rich in Canary Wolf, 0:09:37.200 --> 0:09:39.160 and then you've got other places that I mean, they're 0:09:39.200 --> 0:09:40.640 up and coming now, but back then you'd have like 0:09:40.679 --> 0:09:43.440 Shadwell and Stepney that were just really poor. So for 0:09:43.679 --> 0:09:46.040 policing it was brilliant because you've got to do so 0:09:46.200 --> 0:09:48.880 much different stuff. I absolutely loved it. I thought it 0:09:48.920 --> 0:09:52.280 was I loved my job. I was very obsessed with it. 0:09:52.600 --> 0:09:56.560 Yeah, that's that's very evident onto you know, going on 0:09:56.600 --> 0:09:59.640 to what you where you decided to take your career 0:10:00.040 --> 0:10:03.720 within the police force, because there's multiple sort of courses, 0:10:03.760 --> 0:10:06.720 there's multiple avenues you can go down. 0:10:07.160 --> 0:10:09.400 Did you know what you wanted to do? I take it. 0:10:09.400 --> 0:10:11.880 There's a probation period like any other where you have 0:10:11.920 --> 0:10:14.080 to do a couple of years. You know, Bobby on 0:10:14.120 --> 0:10:15.920 the beat, which doesn't exist, you know, but you know 0:10:16.000 --> 0:10:17.360 you have to go out on the streets. 0:10:17.360 --> 0:10:18.720 Is it a two year process? 0:10:19.480 --> 0:10:21.480 And then within that two years you sort of decide 0:10:21.480 --> 0:10:22.520 where you want to go from there. 0:10:22.800 --> 0:10:25.040 It's supposed to be, yes, it is exactly what's going 0:10:25.160 --> 0:10:30.280 to happen, but you know it's yeah, it's supposed to 0:10:30.320 --> 0:10:31.920 be like that. But you know, when there's a demand 0:10:31.960 --> 0:10:35.760 and they've got someone that can fit that role, it's 0:10:36.040 --> 0:10:38.040 ways and means act we like to call it. I 0:10:38.080 --> 0:10:39.880 did just shy of two years before I ended up 0:10:39.920 --> 0:10:41.600 moving on, but I had no clue where I was 0:10:41.600 --> 0:10:43.359 going out. I thought I was going to be a 0:10:43.440 --> 0:10:46.600 you know, a first team. Ever, I never thought i'd 0:10:46.679 --> 0:10:48.880 leave and go and do anything specially, So I loved it. 0:10:48.920 --> 0:10:51.280 I loved being out in the cars and running around. 0:10:51.280 --> 0:10:52.880 I thought it was like the best thing ever. You 0:10:52.920 --> 0:10:54.959 get a call off Saturday night and on a night 0:10:55.040 --> 0:10:59.080 duty there's like a fire or suspects on. I'm like, oh, go, 0:10:59.360 --> 0:11:00.600 I want to get want to be in the thick 0:11:00.600 --> 0:11:03.480 of it. I want to get amongst it. And it 0:11:03.520 --> 0:11:06.439 was evident quite early when I wasn't the person It 0:11:06.520 --> 0:11:09.679 sounds awful, but I was better with the suspects and 0:11:09.720 --> 0:11:13.720 the victims. I'm not very emotional, I'm not very tactile, 0:11:14.280 --> 0:11:15.600 So for me to be able to put my arm 0:11:15.600 --> 0:11:17.839 on someone and pat them, it just be really patronizing 0:11:17.880 --> 0:11:20.560 because it's just not who I am. And I think 0:11:20.600 --> 0:11:23.480 my my superior saw that quite quickly, and don't let 0:11:23.480 --> 0:11:26.720 her go to any victims because she's the worst person 0:11:26.720 --> 0:11:27.240 in the world. 0:11:36.720 --> 0:11:39.520 You're jumping in an app cars, You're you're going to 0:11:40.080 --> 0:11:42.640 crime scenes, You're you're you're dealing with people on the streets. 0:11:44.040 --> 0:11:46.960 Do you know what's around the corner? 0:11:47.120 --> 0:11:50.240 When I suppose you know, one of your inspectors comes 0:11:50.280 --> 0:11:52.479 up to you and says, ah, we've got a specialist 0:11:52.480 --> 0:11:54.840 trade for you. You know, do you fancy doing it? 0:11:54.880 --> 0:11:57.800 Was it as much as the hend and you know 0:11:57.840 --> 0:12:00.439 you were starting tomorrow? Was it very much like that 0:12:00.480 --> 0:12:03.800 with the specialist trade? That that was that was put 0:12:03.840 --> 0:12:04.280 in front of you? 0:12:04.360 --> 0:12:04.960 Shall we say? 0:12:05.840 --> 0:12:07.960 Yeah? They didn't word it so nicely. They told me 0:12:08.160 --> 0:12:10.280 not to come in to work the next day and 0:12:10.320 --> 0:12:12.880 go straight to New Scotland Yard and wear a suit. 0:12:13.120 --> 0:12:14.160 And I was so scared. 0:12:14.280 --> 0:12:16.560 So you're Bobby on the bee. You come back and 0:12:16.600 --> 0:12:18.480 they say this is what they say to you, don't 0:12:18.480 --> 0:12:19.160 come in tomorrow. 0:12:19.679 --> 0:12:21.400 Yeah, don't come in tomorrow. You need to be a 0:12:21.440 --> 0:12:23.760 new Scotland Yard at this time. Make sure you wear 0:12:23.800 --> 0:12:24.160 a suit. 0:12:24.559 --> 0:12:24.920 Wow. 0:12:25.600 --> 0:12:26.720 Yeah, and that's all I had. 0:12:28.679 --> 0:12:31.240 Yeah, so come on you, you obviously put on a 0:12:31.280 --> 0:12:33.200 suit you go to New Scotland Yard. 0:12:33.760 --> 0:12:35.160 It was a suit transpire. 0:12:35.840 --> 0:12:37.640 I bought a really cheap suit from next. 0:12:37.920 --> 0:12:41.000 We all had this. The next seats don't worry about that. 0:12:40.960 --> 0:12:42.600 You know, the ones with the cheap lining in them, 0:12:42.600 --> 0:12:44.640 so if it's hot, you really sweat. Yeah, it was 0:12:44.640 --> 0:12:47.240 one of those and I said. I remember saying to 0:12:47.240 --> 0:12:50.839 my my governor, like any what can you tell me that? 0:12:50.880 --> 0:12:52.400 What's it all about? And he was like if I 0:12:52.440 --> 0:12:54.720 tell you it's too obvious, just go And I was like, amazing, 0:12:54.840 --> 0:12:57.760 thanks for that. And then I've got there and I've 0:12:57.760 --> 0:13:00.000 been to the yard before for briefings and stuff like that, 0:13:00.120 --> 0:13:03.319 but I got there, went to this floor, come out 0:13:03.320 --> 0:13:04.800 with lift and it was all closed. It was an 0:13:04.840 --> 0:13:08.360 open plan, which was odd. So I knocked on the 0:13:08.360 --> 0:13:10.320 door and I was met by this lovely Scottish man 0:13:10.400 --> 0:13:13.160 and he said, ah, you must be done here and 0:13:13.200 --> 0:13:16.560 I was like hello. He's like really nice and He 0:13:16.640 --> 0:13:18.560 just said, you obviously don't know why you're here, because 0:13:18.559 --> 0:13:20.520 he could see I was nervous. I said, I have 0:13:20.520 --> 0:13:22.880 no idea, and he took me in and he just 0:13:22.920 --> 0:13:25.959 basically explained what SCD ten was, what they do, how 0:13:25.960 --> 0:13:28.960 it works. And I made such an idiot of myself 0:13:29.000 --> 0:13:30.920 because I said, oh, no, it's fine. I've been doing 0:13:31.000 --> 0:13:33.120 undercover work anywhere in my borrow. I've been wearing my 0:13:33.120 --> 0:13:35.199 own clothes and going out and resting people in cars. 0:13:35.200 --> 0:13:37.600 And he was like, that's not how this world works. 0:13:37.640 --> 0:13:40.640 And I was like, oh, so go back to that 0:13:40.760 --> 0:13:48.160 title you just said, s SCD ten SCD ten, right 0:13:48.600 --> 0:13:51.960 when you come out of that meeting, what what do 0:13:52.040 --> 0:13:53.440 you understand about this. 0:13:53.440 --> 0:13:56.840 Role that I'm going to have. Basically, if I passed 0:13:56.840 --> 0:14:03.040 the corpse, have a double life, and even amongst basically 0:14:03.080 --> 0:14:05.360 the worst kinds of people in the UK, I'm going 0:14:05.360 --> 0:14:08.680 to live amongst them, infiltrate them, become their friend, and 0:14:08.760 --> 0:14:11.080 basically manipulate them to give me all the information that 0:14:11.120 --> 0:14:14.640 we need. But undercover, I'm going to be one of 0:14:14.679 --> 0:14:16.440 them and they like me, and we're all going to 0:14:16.440 --> 0:14:18.480 be friends, and I'll be honest. I walked out of 0:14:18.480 --> 0:14:21.680 there and just thought, like Jason Bourne, obviously it's nothing 0:14:21.840 --> 0:14:23.960 like that. But when you're young, you don't get it. 0:14:24.920 --> 0:14:27.240 And I remember he said to me, what's your interest? 0:14:27.320 --> 0:14:29.240 What do you like? And I remember thinking, I don't 0:14:29.240 --> 0:14:31.880 really know what you mean. Because everyone in that unit 0:14:31.880 --> 0:14:34.359 has a specialism. So some of them might be mechanics, 0:14:34.680 --> 0:14:37.640 some of them might be foreign speakers, some of them 0:14:37.680 --> 0:14:40.760 are enthusiasts and pros. Obviously I have none of that, 0:14:42.080 --> 0:14:45.000 and I just got thrown into what he or what 0:14:45.000 --> 0:14:47.360 they thought was my specialism, and it turned out it was. 0:14:47.440 --> 0:14:50.000 But you know, I was young. I knew how to party, 0:14:50.480 --> 0:14:51.880 and I knew how to go to the clubs. You know, 0:14:52.160 --> 0:14:58.560 he had to China whites on Wednesday faces on a Saturday, 0:14:58.640 --> 0:15:01.840 Like I went to those plays and I never told obviously, 0:15:01.840 --> 0:15:03.360 you never told anyone what I did for a job, 0:15:03.760 --> 0:15:05.440 But I went to all these places, so I knew 0:15:05.480 --> 0:15:09.400 how that world worked. So that's kind of where I 0:15:09.440 --> 0:15:12.840 fell into. So drugs basically became my thing to go 0:15:12.880 --> 0:15:13.400 and work on. 0:15:14.080 --> 0:15:17.800 So yeah, you literally thereafter you have to go on 0:15:17.800 --> 0:15:20.440 to a You literally have to build a double life, 0:15:20.440 --> 0:15:21.080 don't you. 0:15:21.080 --> 0:15:23.440 You literally have to to. 0:15:22.800 --> 0:15:30.960 To forget about your pre existence, and and and lie 0:15:31.040 --> 0:15:34.280 to your mind, lie to yourself that you're this other person, 0:15:34.320 --> 0:15:36.440 and it is that's exactly what it is. You know 0:15:36.680 --> 0:15:39.520 you're living a lie. You know you're lying to yourself. 0:15:39.600 --> 0:15:42.120 Therefore you're living a lie. And it's uh, you know, 0:15:42.400 --> 0:15:45.480 you're completely manufacturing something. But you have to know that 0:15:45.760 --> 0:15:50.040 people don't understand. You have to know this suitor person 0:15:50.560 --> 0:15:53.640 better than you know yourself. Right. You almost have to 0:15:53.640 --> 0:15:57.960 push yourself aside because this is the new youth from 0:15:58.040 --> 0:16:00.920 every single detail someone tries to get you out. If 0:16:00.960 --> 0:16:04.760 someone gets suspicious that you're you're an undercover, they will 0:16:04.800 --> 0:16:08.560 ask certain questions. You literally have to go so deep 0:16:08.720 --> 0:16:11.040 into this second life that you become it. 0:16:11.560 --> 0:16:14.160 Yeah, it's true because if you're being yourself, you just 0:16:14.200 --> 0:16:16.160 know the answer because you're telling the truth. But when 0:16:16.200 --> 0:16:18.920 you've been someone else, you need to. It's constantly on 0:16:18.960 --> 0:16:21.880 your brain, like why am I here? What's my name? Like, 0:16:22.040 --> 0:16:23.400 you know, if you're walking down the street and someone 0:16:23.440 --> 0:16:26.080 shouted at Dan, I'd obviously turn around, but if I'm 0:16:26.080 --> 0:16:28.360 really most of the time you do use as close 0:16:28.360 --> 0:16:30.440 to your name as possible, but some cases you don't. 0:16:31.040 --> 0:16:32.880 So you know you need to be on just little 0:16:32.880 --> 0:16:36.120 stupid things like niances like that or that. Obviously my accent. 0:16:36.160 --> 0:16:38.840 If I'm in Scotland or in the North, what am 0:16:38.840 --> 0:16:41.400 I doing out there this accent? He's not local, so 0:16:41.400 --> 0:16:43.800 what am I doing there? So you need answers all 0:16:43.840 --> 0:16:45.080 the time. And it's not like you have to sit 0:16:45.120 --> 0:16:47.480 there really off because it's not an interview, but you 0:16:47.520 --> 0:16:50.240 need to be natural with it as well. So but 0:16:50.320 --> 0:16:52.480 I think because I was young, I didn't know any different. 0:16:53.480 --> 0:16:55.480 And how hard was that for you? For you to adapt? 0:16:56.240 --> 0:16:59.240 Surprisingly easy. I quite liked it. I felt like it 0:16:59.280 --> 0:17:00.800 was quite like active a little bit, and I thought 0:17:00.840 --> 0:17:03.560 it was quite I just I didn't know any different. 0:17:03.640 --> 0:17:06.119 And when I met some of the out former ucs 0:17:06.520 --> 0:17:08.960 or the undercover officers who had done this for years, 0:17:09.240 --> 0:17:11.280 they were so cool. In my head, I thought they 0:17:11.320 --> 0:17:13.840 were absolutely like elite and I just wanted to be 0:17:13.880 --> 0:17:16.080 a part of their click. I wanted There was no 0:17:16.640 --> 0:17:18.879 real girly girls in the unit. There was a few girls, 0:17:18.880 --> 0:17:20.800 but not many, and they weren't really girly. I was 0:17:20.840 --> 0:17:23.879 really girly, So I always felt a little bit like 0:17:24.400 --> 0:17:26.119 I was never going to get to the click because 0:17:26.119 --> 0:17:30.000 I was like the young girly stupid one. But I 0:17:30.080 --> 0:17:32.199 really wanted to be a part of the clique. I 0:17:32.200 --> 0:17:33.359 wanted them to say, do you want to go for 0:17:33.359 --> 0:17:35.040 a drink later? And I wanted to be invited to 0:17:35.040 --> 0:17:37.160 all these things. You don't get invited to unless you've 0:17:37.160 --> 0:17:39.320 made it. 0:17:40.080 --> 0:17:42.199 And it's almost that imposter syndrome, isn't it. 0:17:42.480 --> 0:17:45.119 But ultimately, when you look at that imposter syndrome, you 0:17:45.720 --> 0:17:49.800 you are actually living that boster syndrome because you're being 0:17:49.920 --> 0:17:53.600 someone else when you fully qualified for that role, when 0:17:53.640 --> 0:17:56.440 you when you when you passed the course, what was 0:17:56.480 --> 0:17:59.560