1 00:00:01,600 --> 00:00:02,960 Speaker 1: A thanks for downloading the show. 2 00:00:03,160 --> 00:00:07,280 Speaker 2: Mark Wales was here the other day. Yeah, the survivor, 3 00:00:07,600 --> 00:00:11,320 Speaker 2: but also former SAS soldier, retired SAS soldier. If you 4 00:00:11,320 --> 00:00:15,120 Speaker 2: haven't heard it, it's really something else. The way he 5 00:00:15,160 --> 00:00:21,120 Speaker 2: spoke about Australia's military and need for national security and 6 00:00:21,200 --> 00:00:23,639 Speaker 2: the balancing of what it is we're asking the people 7 00:00:23,680 --> 00:00:27,360 Speaker 2: who go overseas on our behalf to do what we're 8 00:00:27,400 --> 00:00:30,440 Speaker 2: balancing that to do with their well being and the 9 00:00:30,480 --> 00:00:33,440 Speaker 2: benefit or side effect of doing such things. The way 10 00:00:33,479 --> 00:00:36,800 Speaker 2: he spoke about it was really something I really encourage you. 11 00:00:36,800 --> 00:00:37,319 Speaker 1: To check it out. 12 00:00:37,360 --> 00:00:40,640 Speaker 2: Having Mark here with me in the office here AS 13 00:00:41,320 --> 00:00:43,479 Speaker 2: is the same with most of the people that I 14 00:00:43,640 --> 00:00:46,400 Speaker 2: have met, the people that I know who have served 15 00:00:46,479 --> 00:00:49,120 Speaker 2: in intensely high combat situations. 16 00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:51,639 Speaker 1: He has the same thing. 17 00:00:51,960 --> 00:00:57,440 Speaker 2: He is incredibly calm and incredibly measured. We may have 18 00:00:57,480 --> 00:00:59,800 Speaker 2: this idea that an SAS guy or a Navy c 19 00:01:00,320 --> 00:01:04,000 Speaker 2: or a commando will be all noise and physical threatned 20 00:01:04,160 --> 00:01:07,959 Speaker 2: kind of twitchy. Nothing could be further from the truth, 21 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:15,000 Speaker 2: Completely centered up there with the most sandalwood smelling, linen 22 00:01:15,040 --> 00:01:18,319 Speaker 2: wearing yogi that I have ever met, just so calm, 23 00:01:19,760 --> 00:01:25,160 Speaker 2: Because I would imagine the ability to be calm is 24 00:01:25,200 --> 00:01:27,880 Speaker 2: a skill that it's probably the most important skill he 25 00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:32,800 Speaker 2: could have in combat, because staying calm and making rational 26 00:01:32,880 --> 00:01:38,120 Speaker 2: choices will save your life. One of my favorite quotes 27 00:01:39,240 --> 00:01:41,320 Speaker 2: comes from I can't nail down who it was. The 28 00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:43,319 Speaker 2: closest I can get is this person was a former 29 00:01:43,440 --> 00:01:46,720 Speaker 2: master chief, which is the highest rank of the Navy Seals. 30 00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:50,240 Speaker 2: He was a master chief that served in Vietnam, and 31 00:01:50,280 --> 00:01:52,680 Speaker 2: he went on to teach people at the academy there 32 00:01:52,720 --> 00:01:58,760 Speaker 2: in San Diego. And this guy told his students calm 33 00:01:58,920 --> 00:02:04,120 Speaker 2: is contagious, which makes a lot of sense. I have 34 00:02:04,320 --> 00:02:09,120 Speaker 2: been in a riot situation. I have been in a 35 00:02:09,160 --> 00:02:12,800 Speaker 2: crowd when panic sets in. I can safely say that 36 00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:18,280 Speaker 2: panic has a enormously and terrifyingly high virality. But calm, 37 00:02:18,320 --> 00:02:22,400 Speaker 2: on the other hand, calm does the same thing. One 38 00:02:22,440 --> 00:02:26,440 Speaker 2: person that is calm helps another person stay calm. But 39 00:02:26,520 --> 00:02:29,840 Speaker 2: it doesn't happen by accident. People like Mark are trained 40 00:02:29,960 --> 00:02:31,840 Speaker 2: to do it. I wanted to chat with you a 41 00:02:31,840 --> 00:02:34,200 Speaker 2: little bit about that before I do, though, Can I 42 00:02:34,240 --> 00:02:36,239 Speaker 2: play some mats back after the break? 43 00:02:41,480 --> 00:02:43,239 Speaker 1: Kiddo, Thanks for being here, Thanks being a part of 44 00:02:43,240 --> 00:02:45,200 Speaker 1: the show. This is better than yesterday. Helping you make 45 00:02:45,240 --> 00:02:47,600 Speaker 1: today better than yesterday since twenty thirteen. My name is 46 00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:50,960 Speaker 1: Joshia Ginsburg. I'm a podcaster, best dealing author. I'm a husband. 47 00:02:51,040 --> 00:02:52,600 Speaker 1: I'm a dad, I'm a stepdad. 48 00:02:52,680 --> 00:02:56,720 Speaker 2: I'm a keynote speaker. I'm a bar bell lifter. I'm 49 00:02:56,760 --> 00:03:00,480 Speaker 2: a barbell put her down. I am a weak platener. 50 00:03:00,880 --> 00:03:02,680 Speaker 2: I'm glad you're here. If you want to get in 51 00:03:02,680 --> 00:03:05,640 Speaker 2: touch with me, there's a contact form at Oshiginsberg dot com. 52 00:03:05,760 --> 00:03:07,919 Speaker 2: You can also listen to every episode we've ever done there. 53 00:03:08,080 --> 00:03:10,240 Speaker 2: That's where you can find it. Mark Wales was here. 54 00:03:10,680 --> 00:03:13,359 Speaker 2: He's put out two books now, an autobiography and a novel, 55 00:03:14,120 --> 00:03:17,600 Speaker 2: and he's former SAS soldier, a commander in the SAS. 56 00:03:17,639 --> 00:03:21,200 Speaker 2: He's done ten tours in combat zones overseas. He is 57 00:03:21,400 --> 00:03:24,919 Speaker 2: calm in the way that a monolith is calm, because 58 00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:28,360 Speaker 2: he's six foot four full of muscle, would occlude the sun, 59 00:03:28,720 --> 00:03:29,960 Speaker 2: where are anywhere near you? 60 00:03:30,200 --> 00:03:30,799 Speaker 1: And is just. 61 00:03:32,360 --> 00:03:36,760 Speaker 2: Solid, like densely solid. And he really reminded me of 62 00:03:37,160 --> 00:03:40,080 Speaker 2: something that Todd Sampson told me. Todd Sampson, if you 63 00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:42,800 Speaker 2: don't know, he's a Canadian guy who moved to Australia 64 00:03:42,840 --> 00:03:43,720 Speaker 2: makes his life here now. 65 00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:47,560 Speaker 1: Is incredibly smart and has been. 66 00:03:47,440 --> 00:03:50,480 Speaker 2: In combat situations because he wanted to know about what 67 00:03:50,520 --> 00:03:52,200 Speaker 2: happens in the brain when you're in those situations. And 68 00:03:52,240 --> 00:03:54,040 Speaker 2: he told me that the guys he was with, I 69 00:03:54,040 --> 00:03:55,520 Speaker 2: think they were seals, that might. 70 00:03:55,360 --> 00:03:56,600 Speaker 1: Have been marines. 71 00:03:57,160 --> 00:04:01,160 Speaker 2: They are trained to do essentially what's called box breathing, 72 00:04:01,640 --> 00:04:04,000 Speaker 2: but they rebranded it because why I do box breathing 73 00:04:04,080 --> 00:04:07,040 Speaker 2: when you could call it tactical breeding or combat breathing. 74 00:04:07,440 --> 00:04:10,520 Speaker 2: Take your tactical breath, boys, take your combat breath boys. 75 00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:12,120 Speaker 1: It's box breathing. It's the same thing. 76 00:04:12,640 --> 00:04:17,520 Speaker 2: They're trained to do this stuff in between the micro 77 00:04:17,720 --> 00:04:20,440 Speaker 2: moments of what it is they're doing. Like say they're 78 00:04:20,800 --> 00:04:22,720 Speaker 2: breaching a house and they've got to go door to door. 79 00:04:23,400 --> 00:04:24,880 Speaker 2: You've all seen that. They go through the door, you know, 80 00:04:24,920 --> 00:04:26,520 Speaker 2: they clear the corners, they go clear, and they're going 81 00:04:26,560 --> 00:04:29,000 Speaker 2: to people walking behind them. So they'll break it down 82 00:04:29,040 --> 00:04:32,080 Speaker 2: into these tiny little micromissions. You know, Gavin, there, you're 83 00:04:32,120 --> 00:04:34,200 Speaker 2: going to kick the door, and then I'm going to 84 00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:36,479 Speaker 2: go in because I've studied what the plans are like, 85 00:04:36,560 --> 00:04:38,240 Speaker 2: and I go in two steps that left, there's another 86 00:04:38,279 --> 00:04:40,039 Speaker 2: doorway I'm going to duck down and I'm going to 87 00:04:40,160 --> 00:04:43,239 Speaker 2: cover the corried door, and then my next mission begins, 88 00:04:43,240 --> 00:04:44,840 Speaker 2: which is take three more steps up to the right 89 00:04:44,880 --> 00:04:48,040 Speaker 2: and go to the kitchen. Now, at every point, well 90 00:04:48,080 --> 00:04:50,880 Speaker 2: Gavin's breaking the door down, that soldier is doing a 91 00:04:50,920 --> 00:04:55,480 Speaker 2: box breath, which is breathing through your nose for four counts. One, two, three, four, 92 00:04:55,600 --> 00:04:58,960 Speaker 2: Hold for four counts. Breathe out for four counts, hold 93 00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:01,760 Speaker 2: for four counts. Through the door, bang bang bang clear, 94 00:05:01,880 --> 00:05:04,200 Speaker 2: Get down on one toee, cover the kitchen. Breathe in 95 00:05:04,279 --> 00:05:08,240 Speaker 2: for four counts, hold four counts for four counts, hold 96 00:05:08,320 --> 00:05:10,320 Speaker 2: four counts. Get to the kitchen. One to the through 97 00:05:10,920 --> 00:05:13,040 Speaker 2: there the kitchen. Now box breathe again, and they just 98 00:05:13,120 --> 00:05:15,200 Speaker 2: do it again and again and again. And what that 99 00:05:15,240 --> 00:05:19,920 Speaker 2: does is it helps prevent the cascade of stress hormones 100 00:05:20,240 --> 00:05:24,600 Speaker 2: flooding their system. And these things can increase the likelihood 101 00:05:24,600 --> 00:05:28,359 Speaker 2: of poor decision making and muscle tag and bad motor control. 102 00:05:28,440 --> 00:05:30,320 Speaker 1: And I'll get to that in a sec. 103 00:05:30,880 --> 00:05:34,600 Speaker 2: It's so effective that it's taught to firefighters, it's taught 104 00:05:34,640 --> 00:05:38,440 Speaker 2: to police officers. The way that police teach it is 105 00:05:38,520 --> 00:05:41,039 Speaker 2: kind of interesting. They talk about learn it until you 106 00:05:41,080 --> 00:05:43,240 Speaker 2: forget it. Like Bruce Lee said that once learn it, 107 00:05:43,320 --> 00:05:46,000 Speaker 2: until you forget it. They've got to make it reflexive. 108 00:05:46,080 --> 00:05:47,560 Speaker 2: And the way that police do it is kind of 109 00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:50,839 Speaker 2: fascinating that it happens when police are training to stay 110 00:05:50,880 --> 00:05:52,480 Speaker 2: calm when they're in a high speed pursuit. 111 00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:53,479 Speaker 1: And this is in America. 112 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:55,479 Speaker 2: We don't really do high speed pursuits much in Australia, 113 00:05:55,520 --> 00:05:57,760 Speaker 2: but they tend to call things off because it's quite dangerous. 114 00:05:58,520 --> 00:06:00,600 Speaker 2: But in the States, for example, they love a bit 115 00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:02,880 Speaker 2: of car chase. News at eleven in LA every night 116 00:06:02,960 --> 00:06:03,560 Speaker 2: was always. 117 00:06:03,279 --> 00:06:03,800 Speaker 1: A car chase. 118 00:06:04,480 --> 00:06:08,720 Speaker 2: And so when they're in these high speed pursuits, they 119 00:06:08,800 --> 00:06:11,200 Speaker 2: want to be able to do this breathing, to stay calm, 120 00:06:11,440 --> 00:06:13,560 Speaker 2: to keep them safe the other people on the road 121 00:06:13,560 --> 00:06:16,120 Speaker 2: who aren't the purp that they're chasing safe, but also 122 00:06:16,160 --> 00:06:18,919 Speaker 2: to make sure that they speak clearly over the radio. 123 00:06:19,320 --> 00:06:24,039 Speaker 2: They are proactively driving, not reflexively driving. And so to 124 00:06:24,160 --> 00:06:26,080 Speaker 2: train for that, to train to be in this high 125 00:06:26,080 --> 00:06:28,280 Speaker 2: speed situation, they want to make it reflexive and they 126 00:06:28,520 --> 00:06:31,479 Speaker 2: almost want to make it Pavlovian. So what they do 127 00:06:31,560 --> 00:06:33,559 Speaker 2: is these guys they'll sit there and they'll watch dash 128 00:06:33,600 --> 00:06:36,480 Speaker 2: cam footage ten minutes at a time on YouTube or 129 00:06:36,520 --> 00:06:40,280 Speaker 2: whatever of high speed pursuits, listening to the sirens, listening 130 00:06:40,279 --> 00:06:41,200 Speaker 2: to all the radio calls. 131 00:06:41,480 --> 00:06:44,480 Speaker 1: They're going to walk onto all. 132 00:06:43,440 --> 00:06:46,400 Speaker 2: That kind of stuff, and they do the breathing in 133 00:06:46,440 --> 00:06:50,240 Speaker 2: for four, hold for four, out for four, hold for four, 134 00:06:50,560 --> 00:06:53,000 Speaker 2: and they do the breathing reflexively with all those noises 135 00:06:53,040 --> 00:06:55,320 Speaker 2: going on. So when they actually get in that situation 136 00:06:55,560 --> 00:06:58,240 Speaker 2: themselves and they're behind the wheel and they're fanging their 137 00:06:58,279 --> 00:07:00,960 Speaker 2: car down the freeway chasing the guy or or their 138 00:07:00,960 --> 00:07:03,920 Speaker 2: body just does it without him thinking about it. They're 139 00:07:03,920 --> 00:07:06,280 Speaker 2: going to have signs over the door as they leave 140 00:07:06,320 --> 00:07:09,360 Speaker 2: the ready room where they get their briefing, you know, cool, 141 00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:11,440 Speaker 2: wel check, get in here like that that room were 142 00:07:11,520 --> 00:07:13,040 Speaker 2: going to go after these We've got to eat people. 143 00:07:12,880 --> 00:07:13,920 Speaker 1: Like you've seen in all the shows. 144 00:07:14,120 --> 00:07:15,960 Speaker 2: But they have a sign above the door that says, 145 00:07:16,000 --> 00:07:19,880 Speaker 2: breathe before you leave, which I really laugh. Breathe before 146 00:07:19,880 --> 00:07:21,000 Speaker 2: you leave. So it's a kind of a way of 147 00:07:21,040 --> 00:07:24,280 Speaker 2: hitting reset. You know, the printer is not working, the 148 00:07:24,320 --> 00:07:26,480 Speaker 2: coffee's cold. Now I've got to get my car and go. 149 00:07:26,440 --> 00:07:29,600 Speaker 1: And fight crime. That America. Everyone's got a gun. We 150 00:07:29,680 --> 00:07:30,320 Speaker 1: know how that can work. 151 00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:33,080 Speaker 2: Out sometimes how can you stay come in those situations 152 00:07:33,080 --> 00:07:36,200 Speaker 2: at all times. It's also something they teach to journalists. 153 00:07:36,240 --> 00:07:39,360 Speaker 2: If you're journalists getting embedded into a war zone, they 154 00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:41,600 Speaker 2: send them off on like three or four day camps 155 00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:43,800 Speaker 2: essentially to like, these are all the things you need 156 00:07:43,840 --> 00:07:45,120 Speaker 2: to know if we're going to keep your life, if 157 00:07:45,120 --> 00:07:47,040 Speaker 2: you're going to come with us, And they teach them 158 00:07:47,040 --> 00:07:49,680 Speaker 2: this tactical breathing, and they tell them this will save 159 00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:53,600 Speaker 2: your life because if you're in a high stress situation 160 00:07:53,640 --> 00:07:56,800 Speaker 2: for too long, you will make terrible choices, and you 161 00:07:56,840 --> 00:07:58,640 Speaker 2: won't realize you're making terrible choices. 162 00:07:58,440 --> 00:07:59,080 Speaker 1: Until you're dead. 163 00:08:00,120 --> 00:08:03,800 Speaker 2: And it's fascinating because what essentially is doing is deliberately 164 00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:05,880 Speaker 2: controlling your autonomic nervous system, which is a thing that 165 00:08:05,920 --> 00:08:09,360 Speaker 2: helps us digest and sleep and heal and stuff like that. 166 00:08:10,080 --> 00:08:13,960 Speaker 2: We're deliberately controlling our autonomic nervous system bringing on a 167 00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:19,440 Speaker 2: relaxation response. Because what happens when we get heightened, the 168 00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:23,360 Speaker 2: hormones fire up, the heart rate fires up, our digestion stops. 169 00:08:23,720 --> 00:08:26,840 Speaker 2: Sometimes we poop. Apparently happens all the time in combat. 170 00:08:27,560 --> 00:08:31,000 Speaker 2: So when you start box breathing, you're actively adjusting that 171 00:08:31,120 --> 00:08:34,520 Speaker 2: nervous system, and you're slowing down, and you're sending messages 172 00:08:34,520 --> 00:08:36,880 Speaker 2: to that autonomic nervous system. We can and everything down 173 00:08:37,240 --> 00:08:40,320 Speaker 2: and that regulates the hormone releases, regulates the adrenaline, regulates 174 00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:42,439 Speaker 2: the quartsole, brings you back into balance and helps you 175 00:08:42,559 --> 00:08:45,600 Speaker 2: kind of be in more of a place where you 176 00:08:45,640 --> 00:08:49,280 Speaker 2: can make a rational choice, appreciate and see and hear 177 00:08:49,360 --> 00:08:51,200 Speaker 2: everything you need to see. I'll get to that in 178 00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:53,640 Speaker 2: a second, and make a choice that could keep you 179 00:08:53,720 --> 00:08:57,320 Speaker 2: and other people alive, because it's super important. Being in 180 00:08:57,360 --> 00:09:02,000 Speaker 2: a high stress situation for too long can be not good. 181 00:09:02,480 --> 00:09:05,520 Speaker 2: It can really really adversely affect you. I'm going to 182 00:09:05,520 --> 00:09:07,280 Speaker 2: talk about it in just a sec, but I do 183 00:09:07,360 --> 00:09:09,080 Speaker 2: need to take a break back in a second. 184 00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:14,880 Speaker 1: Thanks for sticking with me. 185 00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:18,720 Speaker 2: I'm talking about actively staying calm in a stressful situation 186 00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:20,800 Speaker 2: based off you know, Mark Wales was here the other 187 00:09:20,880 --> 00:09:23,080 Speaker 2: day and I just couldn't get over how calm he 188 00:09:23,160 --> 00:09:26,240 Speaker 2: was for a guy that's seen that much combat and 189 00:09:26,280 --> 00:09:29,120 Speaker 2: he's been through a lot, and he's super calm, and 190 00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:31,559 Speaker 2: I've got to come clean. I'm kind of thinking about 191 00:09:31,559 --> 00:09:33,880 Speaker 2: this because I had him. I'm not in combat. I'm 192 00:09:33,880 --> 00:09:35,199 Speaker 2: never going to wear I'm not going to be in 193 00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:38,800 Speaker 2: the army. But I happened to me just the other 194 00:09:38,880 --> 00:09:44,640 Speaker 2: day when I allowed myself to get too agitated, too quickly, 195 00:09:44,920 --> 00:09:48,360 Speaker 2: too many times in a row, and something happened that 196 00:09:48,360 --> 00:09:50,800 Speaker 2: I'm not happy about. There was a moment between me 197 00:09:50,880 --> 00:09:53,880 Speaker 2: and my stepdaughter. It was, you know, simple stepfather step 198 00:09:53,960 --> 00:09:56,120 Speaker 2: daughter stuff. Can you take the rubbish out? Or you know, 199 00:09:56,400 --> 00:09:57,080 Speaker 2: why's that there? 200 00:09:57,440 --> 00:09:57,640 Speaker 1: You know? 201 00:09:57,880 --> 00:09:59,599 Speaker 2: Just I can't remember, but there was a bit of 202 00:09:59,640 --> 00:10:03,199 Speaker 2: archib Then I was a bit like annoyed, and then 203 00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:05,920 Speaker 2: I went to speak to Audrey with this annoyance. Audrey, 204 00:10:05,920 --> 00:10:08,440 Speaker 2: here's the annoyance in my voice because I'm coming at 205 00:10:08,440 --> 00:10:11,080 Speaker 2: her with a tone and then she responds with tone, 206 00:10:11,080 --> 00:10:13,440 Speaker 2: and then I'm reacting, and then I'm walking back to 207 00:10:13,440 --> 00:10:13,800 Speaker 2: the kitchen. 208 00:10:13,800 --> 00:10:14,680 Speaker 1: I'm on a hair trigger. 209 00:10:15,160 --> 00:10:18,040 Speaker 2: And then g says something quite benign like can you 210 00:10:18,160 --> 00:10:19,920 Speaker 2: leave the keys for the car or something over there? 211 00:10:19,960 --> 00:10:20,560 Speaker 1: I need it later. 212 00:10:20,640 --> 00:10:24,120 Speaker 2: And then I've allowed this cascade of hormones to start 213 00:10:24,160 --> 00:10:26,120 Speaker 2: flooding into my system without getting on top of it. 214 00:10:26,360 --> 00:10:28,640 Speaker 2: I said something that I know better than to say, 215 00:10:28,679 --> 00:10:33,360 Speaker 2: and I stormed off. Great modeling behavior from me there, Nah, terrible. 216 00:10:33,880 --> 00:10:36,400 Speaker 2: I do have an amends to make around that, that's 217 00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:38,640 Speaker 2: for sure, and that kind of what got me thinking 218 00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:42,320 Speaker 2: of that comment breathing to be honest and why people 219 00:10:42,400 --> 00:10:44,719 Speaker 2: do it, because as we get more stressed, you can 220 00:10:44,840 --> 00:10:46,520 Speaker 2: probably relate to what I just spoke about. As we 221 00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:48,960 Speaker 2: get more stressed, we get more reactive, and her choices, 222 00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:53,440 Speaker 2: our decisions get more and more negatively affected. When you're 223 00:10:53,440 --> 00:10:55,480 Speaker 2: in that threat response, when your heart rate's really gone 224 00:10:55,480 --> 00:10:58,360 Speaker 2: and that adrenaline has this pure spike where everything is 225 00:10:58,400 --> 00:11:02,320 Speaker 2: just like crystallized, that's important. But when it goes on 226 00:11:02,400 --> 00:11:05,640 Speaker 2: for too long, what can happen is our focus can 227 00:11:06,080 --> 00:11:08,160 Speaker 2: narrow so much. We can kind of get tunnel vision 228 00:11:08,760 --> 00:11:11,760 Speaker 2: and we're aren't able to see what things are happening 229 00:11:11,800 --> 00:11:13,959 Speaker 2: to either side of us, and we won't miss really 230 00:11:13,960 --> 00:11:18,160 Speaker 2: important things. Our brain can be overloaded and we can't 231 00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:21,440 Speaker 2: think rationally. We make poor decisions. We aren't able to 232 00:11:21,480 --> 00:11:25,360 Speaker 2: solve problems. Things that are complicated, like I don't know, 233 00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:31,240 Speaker 2: remembering a phone number or a complex task like unlocking 234 00:11:31,240 --> 00:11:34,360 Speaker 2: a door or something like that can be incredibly challenging. 235 00:11:34,480 --> 00:11:37,800 Speaker 2: Trying to find keys that I can't remember which key 236 00:11:37,840 --> 00:11:39,600 Speaker 2: opens the front door or whatever. Things like that can 237 00:11:39,640 --> 00:11:43,439 Speaker 2: be incredibly challenging. It's very hard to remember things because 238 00:11:43,600 --> 00:11:45,679 Speaker 2: that part of your brain is working in a very 239 00:11:45,720 --> 00:11:49,440 Speaker 2: different way, So the ability to remember important things vanishes. 240 00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:53,520 Speaker 2: Information that it's unrelated to whatever's going on here, it 241 00:11:53,520 --> 00:11:56,439 Speaker 2: does not exist anymore, so yet have very little context. 242 00:11:57,280 --> 00:12:00,000 Speaker 2: It's very very hard afterwards to try to talk about 243 00:12:00,880 --> 00:12:03,800 Speaker 2: you said this. I said that I can barely remember. 244 00:12:03,920 --> 00:12:06,200 Speaker 2: Ordrey says, that's not what I said, and I'm like, 245 00:12:06,360 --> 00:12:08,960 Speaker 2: I can't actually remember. Sometimes it makes it very very 246 00:12:08,960 --> 00:12:11,680 Speaker 2: difficult for me to not really be able to remember 247 00:12:11,679 --> 00:12:14,280 Speaker 2: what's happening when I'm in those states, when she and 248 00:12:14,320 --> 00:12:16,760 Speaker 2: I are, because every relationship has Archie Margy, come on, 249 00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:18,640 Speaker 2: you have it, I have it. The other thing that 250 00:12:18,640 --> 00:12:21,200 Speaker 2: can happen with I talked about field of vision narrowing 251 00:12:21,200 --> 00:12:24,480 Speaker 2: the tunnel vision, you can also get tunnel hearing. Our 252 00:12:24,920 --> 00:12:29,240 Speaker 2: ability to attend to sound and audio input narrows enormously, 253 00:12:29,280 --> 00:12:31,640 Speaker 2: so we can miss what people say to us, we 254 00:12:31,679 --> 00:12:36,679 Speaker 2: can miss information, we can miss words. All these things 255 00:12:36,760 --> 00:12:39,280 Speaker 2: kind of happen at the same time. Because our heart 256 00:12:39,360 --> 00:12:41,440 Speaker 2: rates up and you know, all these things are flying 257 00:12:41,480 --> 00:12:44,839 Speaker 2: through our bloodstream. Our fine motor skills can really decline 258 00:12:45,480 --> 00:12:48,920 Speaker 2: like delicate hand movements, like I said, like tying shoelaces. 259 00:12:49,240 --> 00:12:51,720 Speaker 2: You know, it's hard to do if your hands are shaking. 260 00:12:51,800 --> 00:12:55,560 Speaker 2: It's very, very difficult driving. Our bodies can really really 261 00:12:55,600 --> 00:12:57,680 Speaker 2: tense up. I noticed it on the motorcycle sometimes, or 262 00:12:57,920 --> 00:12:59,760 Speaker 2: if I'm on a freeway and lots and lots of traffic, 263 00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:03,280 Speaker 2: feel my right hand just be like an I and vice. 264 00:13:03,400 --> 00:13:05,640 Speaker 2: I'm like, come on, man, relax there, because that can 265 00:13:05,679 --> 00:13:08,079 Speaker 2: happen without me, you know, thinking about it. And that 266 00:13:08,160 --> 00:13:10,679 Speaker 2: also makes you really tired out because your muscles are 267 00:13:10,720 --> 00:13:13,400 Speaker 2: just tight for too long, and that makes you super exhausted. 268 00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:16,080 Speaker 2: I had a nap on September eleven when. 269 00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:19,000 Speaker 1: I was in New York. I was just fucked. I 270 00:13:19,000 --> 00:13:20,560 Speaker 1: don't know, I can't remember. It was like by eleven 271 00:13:20,559 --> 00:13:21,080 Speaker 1: in the morning. 272 00:13:21,120 --> 00:13:23,400 Speaker 2: I slept for four straight hours to think something like 273 00:13:23,400 --> 00:13:25,360 Speaker 2: that because I couldn't stay awake. 274 00:13:25,440 --> 00:13:27,080 Speaker 1: My brain just my body just shut down. 275 00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:29,560 Speaker 2: And the other thing that can happen when you're in 276 00:13:29,600 --> 00:13:34,560 Speaker 2: these prolonged stress situations is your startle response really really 277 00:13:34,600 --> 00:13:36,560 Speaker 2: gets super super triggered. And that's what I was just 278 00:13:36,559 --> 00:13:38,280 Speaker 2: talking about just then, is that by the time I 279 00:13:38,360 --> 00:13:40,760 Speaker 2: left the kitchen, you know, had alah with audiny and 280 00:13:40,760 --> 00:13:43,000 Speaker 2: then gone back to the kitchen. When something else was 281 00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:46,800 Speaker 2: said to me that was benign and nothing, I react 282 00:13:46,880 --> 00:13:50,160 Speaker 2: like it's bau and it wasn't. There. Now, I'm not 283 00:13:50,320 --> 00:13:53,480 Speaker 2: an American police officer holding a gun, because you've all 284 00:13:53,520 --> 00:13:54,439 Speaker 2: seen what happens there. 285 00:13:54,559 --> 00:13:57,000 Speaker 1: It can be really bad. It's very funny that when 286 00:13:57,000 --> 00:13:58,880 Speaker 1: they talk about this in the literature, they say. 287 00:13:58,800 --> 00:14:02,200 Speaker 2: It can prevent the acts fidential discharge of weapons, which 288 00:14:02,280 --> 00:14:05,520 Speaker 2: is a really fun way of saying you might not 289 00:14:05,720 --> 00:14:10,000 Speaker 2: kill a kid, which is pretty horrible. Or you know, 290 00:14:10,280 --> 00:14:12,920 Speaker 2: because you're in that you're just jumping at stuff, you 291 00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:16,800 Speaker 2: might do something really really dangerous. So I've spoken about 292 00:14:16,800 --> 00:14:18,520 Speaker 2: doing this on the motorbike already. You know, when I'm 293 00:14:18,520 --> 00:14:21,480 Speaker 2: doing the polyvagle breathing of three in six out when 294 00:14:21,480 --> 00:14:23,520 Speaker 2: I'm on the motorbike, but I do the box breathing 295 00:14:23,560 --> 00:14:26,280 Speaker 2: quite a bit. But when I do polyvagle breeding, if 296 00:14:26,280 --> 00:14:28,480 Speaker 2: I go too long on my exile, I can feel 297 00:14:28,720 --> 00:14:30,480 Speaker 2: not dizzy, but I can feel a little bit, not 298 00:14:30,560 --> 00:14:32,080 Speaker 2: even warbly. But it's something I don't want to do 299 00:14:32,120 --> 00:14:34,880 Speaker 2: on a motorbike. But the box breathing in for four 300 00:14:35,160 --> 00:14:38,200 Speaker 2: hold for four, Out for four, hold for four. I 301 00:14:38,280 --> 00:14:41,600 Speaker 2: kind of do that reflexively on the motorbike anyway. I 302 00:14:41,640 --> 00:14:43,400 Speaker 2: also do it in the sauna when I'm in the 303 00:14:43,440 --> 00:14:45,560 Speaker 2: sauna at the back and it's like eighty degrees and 304 00:14:45,680 --> 00:14:49,160 Speaker 2: I'm clawing at the door to get out. Perhaps I 305 00:14:49,240 --> 00:14:51,760 Speaker 2: need to do it more when I'm in an escalating 306 00:14:52,360 --> 00:14:59,000 Speaker 2: domestic conversation situation. I already do try to constantly downregulate 307 00:14:59,040 --> 00:15:02,680 Speaker 2: when I'm shall we say quarrel I think is the 308 00:15:02,680 --> 00:15:06,000 Speaker 2: word I already do. But maybe I need to do 309 00:15:06,080 --> 00:15:09,360 Speaker 2: it more actively. Maybe I need to do it like 310 00:15:09,400 --> 00:15:12,120 Speaker 2: I'm a firefight acts. Firefighters a tort to do it 311 00:15:12,720 --> 00:15:14,160 Speaker 2: as soon as they're in the boots. They put their 312 00:15:14,160 --> 00:15:15,800 Speaker 2: boots by the side of the truck right as soon 313 00:15:15,800 --> 00:15:17,120 Speaker 2: as they're in the boots and they're pulling up the. 314 00:15:17,120 --> 00:15:18,080 Speaker 1: Reverels and they're in the truck. 315 00:15:18,120 --> 00:15:20,680 Speaker 2: They do it from there all the way when they're 316 00:15:20,680 --> 00:15:22,320 Speaker 2: at the scene, and they do it all the way 317 00:15:22,360 --> 00:15:23,720 Speaker 2: in the truck on the way home because that also 318 00:15:23,800 --> 00:15:26,720 Speaker 2: helps their bodies downregulate from whatever it was going on. 319 00:15:27,160 --> 00:15:28,880 Speaker 1: It's automatic for them. Maybe I need to do that. 320 00:15:28,880 --> 00:15:30,800 Speaker 2: Maybe I need to put a breathe before you leave 321 00:15:30,840 --> 00:15:32,480 Speaker 2: sign above the door in my office. So when I 322 00:15:32,520 --> 00:15:36,360 Speaker 2: leave here and go back upstairs, you know I've a reset. 323 00:15:36,880 --> 00:15:39,280 Speaker 2: Maybe breathe before I leave the car, Breathe before I 324 00:15:39,320 --> 00:15:42,440 Speaker 2: walk in the front door, Breathe when I close the fridge. 325 00:15:42,520 --> 00:15:45,240 Speaker 2: I don't know, I might have to navy seal this. 326 00:15:45,800 --> 00:15:48,000 Speaker 2: I might have to get some calm as contagious here, 327 00:15:48,720 --> 00:15:51,760 Speaker 2: because I could surely use a bit of that more 328 00:15:51,840 --> 00:15:55,920 Speaker 2: rational decision making and not find myself saying something that 329 00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:58,160 Speaker 2: I regret and I have to go and make an 330 00:15:58,200 --> 00:16:02,360 Speaker 2: amense for Yeah, that could be really useful. I'm going 331 00:16:02,440 --> 00:16:05,360 Speaker 2: to try some of that. I will report back perhaps, 332 00:16:05,440 --> 00:16:07,000 Speaker 2: let me know how you go if you try some. 333 00:16:07,080 --> 00:16:09,480 Speaker 2: There's a contact form at Osheaginsburg dot com. Also, you 334 00:16:09,480 --> 00:16:12,200 Speaker 2: can leave a voicemail if you want. Thanks so much 335 00:16:12,240 --> 00:16:15,920 Speaker 2: for listening. I hope you enjoyed exploring that adventure in 336 00:16:15,960 --> 00:16:18,280 Speaker 2: breathing with me. We didn't even talk about hook breass 337 00:16:18,560 --> 00:16:21,840 Speaker 2: lava hookbress, but that's for another time. Thanks being a 338 00:16:21,840 --> 00:16:24,000 Speaker 2: part of it. Enjoy your box breathing, let me know 339 00:16:24,040 --> 00:16:27,760 Speaker 2: how you go. Sorry, Enjoy your combat breathing. Enjoy your 340 00:16:27,880 --> 00:16:31,880 Speaker 2: tactical breathing. Tactical breathe through your next tactical quarrel about 341 00:16:32,040 --> 00:16:35,240 Speaker 2: whose turn it is to take out the bins or whatever. 342 00:16:36,680 --> 00:16:39,640 Speaker 2: Here's the credits. It'll be an AI person. Thanks for listening. 343 00:16:40,920 --> 00:16:43,680 Speaker 3: This episode was brought to you by Andy Maher on 344 00:16:43,840 --> 00:16:48,280 Speaker 3: audio post production, Becksied on video post production, toe Hider 345 00:16:48,400 --> 00:16:51,840 Speaker 3: on music. My producer is Bree Steel, and my executive 346 00:16:51,880 --> 00:16:55,560 Speaker 3: function assistant is Monica Chapman. For every episode ever. To 347 00:16:55,600 --> 00:16:57,480 Speaker 3: get on the mailing list or to get in touch 348 00:16:57,560 --> 00:17:01,480 Speaker 3: through the contact form, head to Osherginsburg dot com. Thanks 349 00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:02,080 Speaker 3: for listening.