1 00:00:01,040 --> 00:00:03,800 Speaker 1: Good, our team, hope, you're bloody terrific. Just me today, 2 00:00:04,200 --> 00:00:07,360 Speaker 1: just me, So if you don't like me, time to go. 3 00:00:08,880 --> 00:00:13,320 Speaker 1: So I want to talk about decision making. And the 4 00:00:13,320 --> 00:00:16,239 Speaker 1: reason I want to talk about this is because it 5 00:00:16,360 --> 00:00:21,319 Speaker 1: is a constant thing that comes up, obviously when I 6 00:00:21,360 --> 00:00:23,319 Speaker 1: talk to people about building their best life or the 7 00:00:23,360 --> 00:00:26,400 Speaker 1: best diet or the best training program or operating system 8 00:00:26,480 --> 00:00:29,360 Speaker 1: or business or brand or emotional state or all of 9 00:00:29,360 --> 00:00:31,960 Speaker 1: those broad conversations that I have with lots of people. 10 00:00:32,800 --> 00:00:36,720 Speaker 1: Because we talk about situations, circumstance, environment, we talk about mindset, 11 00:00:36,760 --> 00:00:39,199 Speaker 1: we talk about behaviors, we talk about actions, we talk 12 00:00:39,240 --> 00:00:43,320 Speaker 1: about outcomes, but we don't and we talk a bit 13 00:00:43,400 --> 00:00:46,600 Speaker 1: about decisions, but I don't think we talk enough about 14 00:00:46,760 --> 00:00:50,320 Speaker 1: the big and small, the incidental, the life changing, the 15 00:00:51,280 --> 00:00:54,160 Speaker 1: high conscious, the low conscious, like some things we do 16 00:00:54,240 --> 00:00:56,880 Speaker 1: with a very low level of awareness and consciousness, like 17 00:00:57,400 --> 00:01:00,600 Speaker 1: when I ride my motorbike into the city and changing 18 00:01:00,640 --> 00:01:04,520 Speaker 1: gears and I'm using the front brake and the rear brake, 19 00:01:04,640 --> 00:01:06,960 Speaker 1: the front break with my right hand, the rear brake 20 00:01:07,080 --> 00:01:09,240 Speaker 1: with my right foot, the clutch with my left hand, 21 00:01:09,280 --> 00:01:13,000 Speaker 1: the gear changer with my left foot, the indicator with 22 00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:15,120 Speaker 1: my left thumb and all of that I'm doing. That's 23 00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:19,160 Speaker 1: low level awareness and consciousness. It's kind of programmed in. 24 00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:22,920 Speaker 1: But I'm not accidentally pulling in the clutch or turning 25 00:01:22,959 --> 00:01:26,080 Speaker 1: the accelerator with my right hand or the throttle more 26 00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:29,800 Speaker 1: accurately known as in motorcycling world. You know, I'm doing 27 00:01:29,840 --> 00:01:34,400 Speaker 1: all of those things. I'm making those decisions, operationalizing that decision, 28 00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:37,440 Speaker 1: and then creating an outcome which is hopefully a safe 29 00:01:37,480 --> 00:01:42,240 Speaker 1: passage into my gig in the city. And they're all choices, 30 00:01:42,240 --> 00:01:45,360 Speaker 1: and they happen on a low consciousness level. But also 31 00:01:45,600 --> 00:01:49,840 Speaker 1: on the way into the city, I'm thinking about stuff 32 00:01:49,840 --> 00:01:52,720 Speaker 1: and I'm making decisions. Maybe I'm making Oh geez, if 33 00:01:52,720 --> 00:01:54,760 Speaker 1: I get in there fifteen minutes earlier, I'll go and 34 00:01:54,800 --> 00:01:58,920 Speaker 1: get a coffee. That's a decision. I probably need to 35 00:01:58,960 --> 00:02:00,640 Speaker 1: have a WII before I get out underway, bit of 36 00:02:00,640 --> 00:02:03,720 Speaker 1: a nervous weed. That's a decision. I might tell this story. 37 00:02:03,760 --> 00:02:05,920 Speaker 1: I might not tell that story. Now I remember this 38 00:02:05,960 --> 00:02:09,080 Speaker 1: group is that certain demographic. So I think I'll go 39 00:02:09,160 --> 00:02:11,640 Speaker 1: with this style or this approach or this kind of 40 00:02:11,639 --> 00:02:15,000 Speaker 1: information or content. I think I'll make it more interactive. 41 00:02:15,040 --> 00:02:17,760 Speaker 1: I'll make it interactive because I've spoken to this group 42 00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:21,160 Speaker 1: before and they are pretty cash. Last time, we'll see 43 00:02:21,160 --> 00:02:23,000 Speaker 1: how we go. I've got to be in and out 44 00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:25,320 Speaker 1: in ninety minutes, so I better make sure that I'm aware. 45 00:02:25,320 --> 00:02:27,079 Speaker 1: I might put my phone down in front of me 46 00:02:27,200 --> 00:02:30,560 Speaker 1: on silent where no one can see it except me. 47 00:02:30,720 --> 00:02:32,519 Speaker 1: I can just keep an eye on the time. That's 48 00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:35,000 Speaker 1: a decision, right. And then also I need to get 49 00:02:35,080 --> 00:02:36,920 Speaker 1: under way. I need to finish on time. That's a 50 00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:39,120 Speaker 1: decision if possible, because I have to be back because 51 00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:41,359 Speaker 1: I have that other thing at that time. Blah blah blah. 52 00:02:41,400 --> 00:02:44,919 Speaker 1: All these decisions and we all do that. We're all 53 00:02:44,960 --> 00:02:49,560 Speaker 1: making decisions constantly. Cornell University out of the States suggests 54 00:02:49,600 --> 00:02:53,359 Speaker 1: that we make somewhere over thirty thousand decisions a day. 55 00:02:53,520 --> 00:02:58,120 Speaker 1: And obviously most of those decisions are not big, contemplative, 56 00:02:58,280 --> 00:03:06,160 Speaker 1: life changing decisions, but you know, decisions. And I've spoken 57 00:03:06,200 --> 00:03:09,720 Speaker 1: to a lot of people who over their journey, and 58 00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:14,359 Speaker 1: if I'm being transparent and a bit self aware, I've 59 00:03:14,440 --> 00:03:20,600 Speaker 1: done the same thing, spoken with people who have made 60 00:03:20,680 --> 00:03:25,600 Speaker 1: certain decisions, and those decisions that they have made or 61 00:03:25,639 --> 00:03:28,680 Speaker 1: even not made, they've avoided making, like they knew they 62 00:03:28,720 --> 00:03:30,760 Speaker 1: should do a certain thing and they chose not to 63 00:03:30,800 --> 00:03:34,120 Speaker 1: do it. Well, that's still a choice. But people who 64 00:03:34,120 --> 00:03:37,120 Speaker 1: have made certain decisions and a year or two or 65 00:03:37,120 --> 00:03:40,000 Speaker 1: five years later, they wake up one day metaphorically in 66 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:42,520 Speaker 1: inverted commas and they go, fuck, how did I get here? 67 00:03:43,160 --> 00:03:47,480 Speaker 1: And how they got here was largely about their choices. 68 00:03:49,320 --> 00:03:52,240 Speaker 1: So we think something. This is the cycle. We think something. 69 00:03:52,280 --> 00:03:55,760 Speaker 1: We have an idea, a thought, a perspective, a story 70 00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:59,560 Speaker 1: about something. That's the genesis is the cognition, the metacognition. 71 00:03:59,600 --> 00:04:02,080 Speaker 1: We think about it, we think about our thinking. But 72 00:04:02,200 --> 00:04:05,240 Speaker 1: the real starting point really from an operational point of view, 73 00:04:05,280 --> 00:04:08,720 Speaker 1: is we make a decision. We make a decision, We 74 00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:12,200 Speaker 1: then take some action. We then take some action, and 75 00:04:12,240 --> 00:04:18,440 Speaker 1: then that produces an outcome, and the outcome affects our 76 00:04:18,440 --> 00:04:26,159 Speaker 1: reality good, bad, big, small, significant, insignificant, noticeable, unnoticeable. But 77 00:04:26,279 --> 00:04:31,880 Speaker 1: every choice that we make generally is accompanied by behavior 78 00:04:32,520 --> 00:04:35,440 Speaker 1: generally or action is then accompanied by some kind of 79 00:04:35,480 --> 00:04:40,360 Speaker 1: result or outcome which has an effect big or small, tiny, ripple, 80 00:04:40,440 --> 00:04:45,880 Speaker 1: massive wave in the life of us. And I think 81 00:04:45,920 --> 00:04:48,680 Speaker 1: we need to get our head around the power of 82 00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:52,960 Speaker 1: these decisions that we make and the role that they 83 00:04:53,040 --> 00:04:58,719 Speaker 1: can play in shaping not only the outcomes in our world, 84 00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:03,119 Speaker 1: but the quality of our life and also the way 85 00:05:03,200 --> 00:05:08,120 Speaker 1: that we can transform ourselves. Like when I make hard decisions, 86 00:05:09,040 --> 00:05:12,120 Speaker 1: decisions that I kind of don't want to make, but 87 00:05:12,240 --> 00:05:16,080 Speaker 1: I know that I need to make based on my 88 00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:20,440 Speaker 1: self awareness and my understanding of what needs to change 89 00:05:20,760 --> 00:05:24,440 Speaker 1: for me, my operating system, my thinking, my behavior, is 90 00:05:24,480 --> 00:05:28,360 Speaker 1: my habits something practical in my world. When I make 91 00:05:28,440 --> 00:05:32,000 Speaker 1: a hard decision even though I kind of don't want to, 92 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:35,599 Speaker 1: and even though I'd rather take, you know, the easy 93 00:05:35,640 --> 00:05:39,560 Speaker 1: option in the moment, But when I can delay gratification 94 00:05:39,720 --> 00:05:42,920 Speaker 1: and I can push that impulse for ease and comfort 95 00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:46,920 Speaker 1: and familiarity, if I can push that aside and go, ah, 96 00:05:46,920 --> 00:05:48,280 Speaker 1: fuck God, I want to do it, but I need 97 00:05:48,320 --> 00:05:49,400 Speaker 1: to do it, So I'm going to do it. So 98 00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:52,400 Speaker 1: I make the hard decision. So I make that phone call, 99 00:05:52,480 --> 00:05:57,040 Speaker 1: I go for that run, I sell that thing, I 100 00:05:57,080 --> 00:06:00,919 Speaker 1: apologize for that behavior, I whatever I own up to 101 00:06:00,960 --> 00:06:08,320 Speaker 1: that bullshit. Then not only am I changing what happens 102 00:06:08,360 --> 00:06:10,480 Speaker 1: in my world and my behavior and my outcomes and 103 00:06:10,520 --> 00:06:15,440 Speaker 1: my reality, but then I'm changing me because now I 104 00:06:15,480 --> 00:06:18,599 Speaker 1: am the dude or the dude who can make decisions 105 00:06:18,600 --> 00:06:22,400 Speaker 1: which are not comfortable, quick, easy, painless, but necessary to 106 00:06:22,480 --> 00:06:27,479 Speaker 1: live in alignment with my values, necessary to create the 107 00:06:27,520 --> 00:06:30,200 Speaker 1: outcomes I want to live, the life I want to 108 00:06:30,880 --> 00:06:33,520 Speaker 1: live in, the body I want, the relationship I want 109 00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:36,240 Speaker 1: to have, the career I want, or to build the 110 00:06:36,279 --> 00:06:39,000 Speaker 1: career that I want, or to get the academic qualification 111 00:06:39,120 --> 00:06:41,160 Speaker 1: that I want, or to write the book that I 112 00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:44,440 Speaker 1: want to write, or to overcome the destructive habit that 113 00:06:44,480 --> 00:06:49,360 Speaker 1: I want to overcome. There's virtually no cases of people 114 00:06:49,400 --> 00:06:54,720 Speaker 1: becoming wildly successful that I'm aware of anyway, who haven't 115 00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:59,920 Speaker 1: as part of their journey, constantly, if not very regularly, 116 00:07:00,480 --> 00:07:04,479 Speaker 1: made hard decisions that most people would not make. You 117 00:07:04,560 --> 00:07:07,960 Speaker 1: and I are decision making machines, and I believe that 118 00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:11,280 Speaker 1: there's an absolute correlation between the quality of our decisions, 119 00:07:12,320 --> 00:07:15,160 Speaker 1: the quality of our behavior, the quality of our outcomes, 120 00:07:15,240 --> 00:07:16,720 Speaker 1: and the quality of how we're going to live and 121 00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:20,520 Speaker 1: do life. So you made a decision to listen to 122 00:07:20,520 --> 00:07:23,120 Speaker 1: this show. You made a decision to listen to the 123 00:07:23,160 --> 00:07:26,440 Speaker 1: You Project today. You didn't have to. You chose. Some 124 00:07:26,480 --> 00:07:29,160 Speaker 1: of you chose to subscribe. You didn't have to subscribe. 125 00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:33,560 Speaker 1: You chose to. Some of you might make a choice 126 00:07:33,600 --> 00:07:36,080 Speaker 1: to turn it off, and if you do, that's see 127 00:07:36,160 --> 00:07:38,679 Speaker 1: next time or never. But some of you will choose 128 00:07:38,680 --> 00:07:42,640 Speaker 1: to keep listening, and some of you will listen, some 129 00:07:42,720 --> 00:07:45,880 Speaker 1: of you will have a light bulb or two. Some 130 00:07:45,960 --> 00:07:48,560 Speaker 1: of you will go, well, that actually makes sense. Some 131 00:07:48,600 --> 00:07:53,400 Speaker 1: of you might see yourself in my words. Some of 132 00:07:53,440 --> 00:07:58,240 Speaker 1: you might resonated with resonate with the ideas, and some 133 00:07:58,280 --> 00:08:02,840 Speaker 1: of you will make a decision to do so. Statistically, 134 00:08:02,960 --> 00:08:05,440 Speaker 1: most of you will not. That's not an insult, that's 135 00:08:05,480 --> 00:08:12,240 Speaker 1: not a provocation. That's how it works. So I might 136 00:08:12,320 --> 00:08:14,840 Speaker 1: say something that for you, if you would turn that 137 00:08:15,000 --> 00:08:18,320 Speaker 1: idea or that intention or that thought or that strategy 138 00:08:18,520 --> 00:08:21,880 Speaker 1: into some kind of behavior, that might help, That might 139 00:08:22,280 --> 00:08:25,560 Speaker 1: move you forward in some capacity, That might solve a problem, 140 00:08:25,920 --> 00:08:28,720 Speaker 1: that might lead to a breakthrough, that might lead to 141 00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:32,480 Speaker 1: some kind of growth, some kind of improved resilience or 142 00:08:32,480 --> 00:08:37,160 Speaker 1: awareness or understanding, some kind of improvement on planet you 143 00:08:38,600 --> 00:08:42,800 Speaker 1: or you can do nothing, also a choice. By the way, 144 00:08:42,840 --> 00:08:44,560 Speaker 1: I don't know if you need to do anything or not. 145 00:08:44,679 --> 00:08:48,240 Speaker 1: So there's no I'm not trying to emotionally or psychologically 146 00:08:48,360 --> 00:08:53,520 Speaker 1: arm twist here. I'm just thinking out loud, like think 147 00:08:53,559 --> 00:08:57,520 Speaker 1: about all like, think of from the moment that we 148 00:08:57,640 --> 00:09:00,280 Speaker 1: wake up to the moment that we go to bed, 149 00:09:00,880 --> 00:09:05,800 Speaker 1: we are constantly making decisions, but also we are constantly 150 00:09:05,880 --> 00:09:11,480 Speaker 1: running stories underneath those decisions. And so yes, we need 151 00:09:11,480 --> 00:09:14,600 Speaker 1: to check our decision making, but we need to also 152 00:09:15,559 --> 00:09:20,320 Speaker 1: check our storytelling, which is really the platform to the 153 00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:26,160 Speaker 1: decision making. Like, if I choose to put something unhealthy 154 00:09:26,320 --> 00:09:31,280 Speaker 1: or toxic in my body, that's a choice, and I 155 00:09:31,400 --> 00:09:34,880 Speaker 1: might say, my story might be oh yeah, but you 156 00:09:34,880 --> 00:09:38,920 Speaker 1: don't understand my situation. I'd worked all day, I did 157 00:09:38,920 --> 00:09:42,320 Speaker 1: an all day gig, and I was starving, and I 158 00:09:42,360 --> 00:09:46,440 Speaker 1: went straight from my gig to Sydney Airport and I 159 00:09:46,480 --> 00:09:49,320 Speaker 1: got to the airport and there was nothing healthy in 160 00:09:49,400 --> 00:09:53,640 Speaker 1: inverted commas. So I just date that, well, firstly, probably 161 00:09:53,679 --> 00:09:57,520 Speaker 1: a fib probably could find something that kind of almost filled. 162 00:09:57,520 --> 00:09:59,319 Speaker 1: Maybe you could get a fruit salad or a yogurt 163 00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:06,720 Speaker 1: or something right, but also, worst case scenario, you could 164 00:10:06,720 --> 00:10:10,840 Speaker 1: not eat. That's a decision, And I'm guessing you probably 165 00:10:10,880 --> 00:10:14,079 Speaker 1: won't die before you get back to Melbourne or wherever 166 00:10:14,080 --> 00:10:17,520 Speaker 1: you're going, because you're not actually starving. And if you 167 00:10:17,559 --> 00:10:22,880 Speaker 1: think you're starving, you literally don't understand starvation again, I'm starving. 168 00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:25,920 Speaker 1: That's a story. What you are is hungry, and that's okay. 169 00:10:26,760 --> 00:10:29,360 Speaker 1: And by the way, being hungry for a while not 170 00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:32,360 Speaker 1: the worst thing. I don't think you should be hungry 171 00:10:32,400 --> 00:10:37,320 Speaker 1: all the time, but being hungry, you know. So, we're 172 00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:40,360 Speaker 1: constantly navigating the practical reality of our world, and we're 173 00:10:40,360 --> 00:10:44,040 Speaker 1: making decisions constantly which either align or don't align with 174 00:10:44,080 --> 00:10:49,319 Speaker 1: our values. We're making decisions with which do or don't 175 00:10:49,320 --> 00:10:51,440 Speaker 1: align with how we want to be and who we 176 00:10:51,480 --> 00:10:54,040 Speaker 1: want to be in the world. We're making decisions which 177 00:10:54,040 --> 00:10:57,320 Speaker 1: align with our goals, with our truth, with our purpose. 178 00:10:58,400 --> 00:10:59,920 Speaker 1: As I said, who we want to be and how 179 00:11:00,040 --> 00:11:02,480 Speaker 1: we want to be in the world. Does this decision? 180 00:11:02,520 --> 00:11:05,440 Speaker 1: By the way, most decisions are somewhat incidental, So let's 181 00:11:05,480 --> 00:11:07,760 Speaker 1: not overthink everything from when we get out of bed 182 00:11:07,880 --> 00:11:11,040 Speaker 1: or we'll give ourselves an aneurysm and do our own 183 00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:14,440 Speaker 1: head in. But when we're making the stuff which is 184 00:11:14,480 --> 00:11:19,320 Speaker 1: more significant and more flu influential on planet U, he's 185 00:11:19,360 --> 00:11:23,040 Speaker 1: a really easy kind of he's a really easy no 186 00:11:23,160 --> 00:11:26,040 Speaker 1: brainer question, which is does this does this thing that 187 00:11:26,080 --> 00:11:29,760 Speaker 1: I'm choosing, does this decision align with who and how 188 00:11:29,800 --> 00:11:32,520 Speaker 1: I want to be? Does this decision align with my values? 189 00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:36,680 Speaker 1: Does this decision that I'm making to do this thing, 190 00:11:36,840 --> 00:11:40,760 Speaker 1: to eat this thing, to not do this thing, does 191 00:11:40,880 --> 00:11:48,360 Speaker 1: this stack up well against my purpose, my moral compass, 192 00:11:50,280 --> 00:11:53,120 Speaker 1: And if it does, will make your decision. If it doesn't, 193 00:11:53,320 --> 00:11:58,680 Speaker 1: also make your decision, there's no there's not meant to 194 00:11:58,679 --> 00:12:01,080 Speaker 1: be for me anyway, any judge or provocation in this, 195 00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:05,760 Speaker 1: but just rather this metacognitive process of thinking about our choices, 196 00:12:05,800 --> 00:12:08,880 Speaker 1: thinking about why do I think? To make your choices 197 00:12:08,880 --> 00:12:11,280 Speaker 1: are a byproduct of your thinking. You're thinking is something 198 00:12:11,320 --> 00:12:13,720 Speaker 1: you can analyze. You're thinking is something you can put 199 00:12:13,800 --> 00:12:17,160 Speaker 1: under a microscope. Here's a really good metacognitive kind of 200 00:12:17,240 --> 00:12:20,839 Speaker 1: corridor to walk down. Why do I keep making decisions 201 00:12:21,160 --> 00:12:24,840 Speaker 1: which fuck up my own life? That's a really good 202 00:12:24,920 --> 00:12:26,680 Speaker 1: I don't know the answer, By the way, It's different 203 00:12:26,679 --> 00:12:30,640 Speaker 1: things for different people. But for some people they make 204 00:12:30,679 --> 00:12:33,600 Speaker 1: decisions in the moment which in the moment give them 205 00:12:33,640 --> 00:12:36,320 Speaker 1: a dopamine hit or some kind of pleasure or some 206 00:12:36,400 --> 00:12:40,440 Speaker 1: kind of momentary fulfillment or escape. I get that. I 207 00:12:40,480 --> 00:12:42,440 Speaker 1: get that, I have done that. I have done that 208 00:12:42,520 --> 00:12:46,199 Speaker 1: many times. But one day I wake up and I've 209 00:12:46,240 --> 00:12:50,280 Speaker 1: been pushing the dopamine button like a motherfucker for fifteen years, 210 00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:53,240 Speaker 1: and now I weigh one hundred and twenty kilos, which 211 00:12:53,280 --> 00:12:56,360 Speaker 1: is what happened to me when I was a young 212 00:12:56,440 --> 00:12:59,160 Speaker 1: personal trainer and I went from at one stage seventy 213 00:12:59,240 --> 00:13:02,680 Speaker 1: nine kilos I'll be completely honest, up to one one seven. 214 00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:05,960 Speaker 1: So what is that? That's thirty eight kilos I gained? 215 00:13:06,040 --> 00:13:08,800 Speaker 1: And why Well, I could be more in depth and 216 00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:11,840 Speaker 1: more detailed, but I was hitting the dopamine button, and 217 00:13:11,880 --> 00:13:15,760 Speaker 1: the dopamine came for me generally in the form of 218 00:13:15,880 --> 00:13:19,360 Speaker 1: food that I shouldn't eat, and not just food like 219 00:13:19,480 --> 00:13:24,520 Speaker 1: types of food, but volumes. Right. I made those choices, 220 00:13:25,559 --> 00:13:29,959 Speaker 1: I took those actions. I created that weight gain all me, 221 00:13:30,160 --> 00:13:32,800 Speaker 1: Am I beating myself up? No? Am I being real 222 00:13:32,840 --> 00:13:36,520 Speaker 1: and raw and honest? Yes? Did I create the problem? 223 00:13:36,679 --> 00:13:39,520 Speaker 1: I created the problem because I made the decisions that 224 00:13:39,600 --> 00:13:45,040 Speaker 1: led to the result. We have to be if we want, like, 225 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:50,240 Speaker 1: if we're serious about this idea of living our purpose, 226 00:13:51,200 --> 00:13:56,240 Speaker 1: taking the narrow path, exploring our talent being the best 227 00:13:56,360 --> 00:14:01,000 Speaker 1: version of us, optimizing our talent, our time, our resources, 228 00:14:01,040 --> 00:14:05,880 Speaker 1: our genetics, our IQ, our creativity. If we are serious 229 00:14:05,920 --> 00:14:09,960 Speaker 1: about doing that, then it needs to become something much 230 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:14,080 Speaker 1: more than a fucking intention and plan and idea, And 231 00:14:14,160 --> 00:14:18,040 Speaker 1: they listen to a podcast. No disrespect, no offense meant, 232 00:14:18,640 --> 00:14:23,880 Speaker 1: but we need to you know, I'm the theory guy. 233 00:14:24,040 --> 00:14:26,840 Speaker 1: I write shit, I say shit. I stand in front 234 00:14:26,880 --> 00:14:29,800 Speaker 1: of audiences and I share what I think sometimes are 235 00:14:29,880 --> 00:14:34,640 Speaker 1: mildly amusing and staining inspirational things. But I have personally 236 00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:39,480 Speaker 1: never changed one person. I've spoken to a lot of people. 237 00:14:39,560 --> 00:14:43,120 Speaker 1: I've probably influenced a fair few people. I've poked and prodded. 238 00:14:44,440 --> 00:14:47,120 Speaker 1: But I'm not the answer. The answer will always be you. 239 00:14:47,160 --> 00:14:50,520 Speaker 1: The answer will always be your ability on planet you. 240 00:14:50,680 --> 00:14:53,480 Speaker 1: The answer is you, your ability to make the decision 241 00:14:54,120 --> 00:14:57,240 Speaker 1: to take the action, to persevere, to roll up your sleeves, 242 00:14:57,280 --> 00:14:59,960 Speaker 1: to get uncomfortable, to fucking get up when most would 243 00:15:00,040 --> 00:15:03,880 Speaker 1: give up, to step up when most would step down, right, 244 00:15:04,040 --> 00:15:07,240 Speaker 1: that is? And that's a choice. Oh it's hard, I know. 245 00:15:07,840 --> 00:15:09,720 Speaker 1: So what are your choices? Oh well, I can keep 246 00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:12,600 Speaker 1: going on? Stop cool? What do you choose? What do 247 00:15:12,640 --> 00:15:15,760 Speaker 1: you choose? Of course? It's fucking hard. Life's hard. Getting 248 00:15:15,800 --> 00:15:18,600 Speaker 1: in shapes hard, business is hard, making money is hard. 249 00:15:18,880 --> 00:15:21,760 Speaker 1: Having great relationships is hard. All of that shit is 250 00:15:21,920 --> 00:15:26,520 Speaker 1: at times, I say underlined at times hard, not all 251 00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:31,880 Speaker 1: the time. But growth and development and awareness and resilience 252 00:15:31,920 --> 00:15:36,200 Speaker 1: and improvement and adaptation and awesomeness doesn't come from sitting 253 00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:42,000 Speaker 1: on the fucking coucheating KFC going. Nobody understands me. How 254 00:15:42,040 --> 00:15:44,960 Speaker 1: come I ended up here? How come? Well, I can 255 00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:47,640 Speaker 1: only speak for me, but how come I ended up 256 00:15:47,640 --> 00:15:50,120 Speaker 1: in the places that I ended up? For the most part, 257 00:15:50,240 --> 00:15:53,320 Speaker 1: few variables out of my control. But for the most part, 258 00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:56,520 Speaker 1: if I'm being honest and authentic and a bit self aware, 259 00:15:56,920 --> 00:16:01,320 Speaker 1: most of the issues in my life were Craig created most, 260 00:16:01,960 --> 00:16:04,000 Speaker 1: and of course bad things happen to me. Of course, 261 00:16:04,040 --> 00:16:07,000 Speaker 1: I've had some shit go on. I've had friends die, 262 00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:09,560 Speaker 1: I've had people rip me off. I've had people that 263 00:16:09,640 --> 00:16:12,720 Speaker 1: I trust prove that they were not trustworthy. I've had disloyalty. 264 00:16:12,760 --> 00:16:14,720 Speaker 1: I've had people steal money from me, lots of things. 265 00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:18,200 Speaker 1: Of course, guess what that happens to a billion people. 266 00:16:18,880 --> 00:16:21,600 Speaker 1: I'm not Robinson Cruz, So guess what even in the 267 00:16:21,600 --> 00:16:24,040 Speaker 1: middle of those bad things happening, When I contrast my 268 00:16:24,160 --> 00:16:27,560 Speaker 1: bad things next to some real bad things that are 269 00:16:27,560 --> 00:16:30,320 Speaker 1: happening happening around the world right now, to other people 270 00:16:30,320 --> 00:16:32,800 Speaker 1: in other countries and other cultures. My bad things are 271 00:16:32,840 --> 00:16:35,760 Speaker 1: a fucking one out of ten on the bad thing scale, 272 00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:39,880 Speaker 1: and I can immerse myself in self pity, and I 273 00:16:39,920 --> 00:16:43,040 Speaker 1: can throw myself a pity party and invite everyone along. 274 00:16:44,400 --> 00:16:47,000 Speaker 1: Or I can say, well, that sucks. That sucks. I 275 00:16:47,040 --> 00:16:49,400 Speaker 1: wish that person didn't do that, but they did do that. 276 00:16:49,520 --> 00:16:51,440 Speaker 1: I wish I didn't lose that money. I wish that 277 00:16:51,520 --> 00:16:56,400 Speaker 1: bad thing didn't happen. I wish my friend didn't get sick. 278 00:16:56,440 --> 00:16:59,480 Speaker 1: I wish all of that, but me wishing doesn't change 279 00:16:59,480 --> 00:17:02,960 Speaker 1: anything that happen. Now I need to choose how I 280 00:17:03,040 --> 00:17:05,320 Speaker 1: will be and who I will be in the middle 281 00:17:05,359 --> 00:17:08,280 Speaker 1: of this shit that I didn't choose or want. So 282 00:17:08,320 --> 00:17:11,359 Speaker 1: the stuff that I didn't choose happens to me around me, 283 00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:14,840 Speaker 1: because of me, inspite of me, And then I choose. 284 00:17:14,960 --> 00:17:16,959 Speaker 1: I get to choose how I will be and who 285 00:17:17,040 --> 00:17:19,040 Speaker 1: I will be in the middle of the shit. I 286 00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:22,080 Speaker 1: get to choose if I will respond positively or negatively. 287 00:17:22,560 --> 00:17:25,840 Speaker 1: I get to choose if I will be the solution 288 00:17:26,040 --> 00:17:28,880 Speaker 1: person or the problem person. I get to choose how 289 00:17:28,880 --> 00:17:33,000 Speaker 1: I will connect and relate and be with others. Will 290 00:17:33,040 --> 00:17:35,320 Speaker 1: I be toxic to be around, or will I be 291 00:17:35,440 --> 00:17:37,679 Speaker 1: the kind of person that people want to be around, 292 00:17:37,680 --> 00:17:40,720 Speaker 1: not because I'm faking it, but because I'm working my 293 00:17:40,800 --> 00:17:43,520 Speaker 1: ass off and I'm trying to be the bloke, to 294 00:17:43,600 --> 00:17:47,720 Speaker 1: be the woman, the man, the person that lives their values. 295 00:17:48,840 --> 00:17:52,440 Speaker 1: I can't change my genetics, neither can you. We can 296 00:17:52,480 --> 00:17:56,760 Speaker 1: influence them, as I've said before, with epigenetics, or we 297 00:17:56,800 --> 00:17:59,600 Speaker 1: can with behavior, I should say, and lifestyle. So that's 298 00:17:59,640 --> 00:18:03,919 Speaker 1: that epigenetic kind of variables and influences. But what I 299 00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:08,760 Speaker 1: can do is I can choose to optimize what I 300 00:18:08,800 --> 00:18:14,440 Speaker 1: have been given at birth. Greg, here's your body, these 301 00:18:14,440 --> 00:18:18,159 Speaker 1: are your genetics. Off you go do eighty years or 302 00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:21,840 Speaker 1: so or whatever. Hopefully eighty, hopefully a bit more, who knows. 303 00:18:21,880 --> 00:18:23,520 Speaker 1: But this is what you've got to work with. So 304 00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:26,680 Speaker 1: in the middle of all the stuff that I can't 305 00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:29,720 Speaker 1: change my genetics, I get the opportunity to choose to 306 00:18:29,800 --> 00:18:32,080 Speaker 1: make a choice, to make a decision about what I 307 00:18:32,119 --> 00:18:35,720 Speaker 1: will do with what I've been given. And now, over 308 00:18:35,760 --> 00:18:38,879 Speaker 1: my journey, I have made bad choices. I've made dumb 309 00:18:38,920 --> 00:18:41,720 Speaker 1: choices which created bad results. But the bad results were 310 00:18:41,720 --> 00:18:44,800 Speaker 1: not about my genetics, but rather my inability to make 311 00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:48,280 Speaker 1: good decisions, to optimize, and to execute on those decisions, 312 00:18:48,560 --> 00:18:50,679 Speaker 1: which would create the kind of body that I wanted 313 00:18:50,680 --> 00:18:54,520 Speaker 1: to live in. Fortunately for me, I found something, some 314 00:18:54,640 --> 00:18:58,480 Speaker 1: self control, some discipline, did a bit of you know, 315 00:18:58,840 --> 00:19:02,919 Speaker 1: self inventory, self searching, and now I have found a 316 00:19:02,960 --> 00:19:08,320 Speaker 1: way to operationalize and optimize what I have to work with. 317 00:19:08,440 --> 00:19:11,199 Speaker 1: But do I have great genetics? No? Now do I 318 00:19:11,240 --> 00:19:13,960 Speaker 1: have an operating system and habits and behaviors and lifestyle 319 00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:18,080 Speaker 1: which support the best outcome for my genetics? Yes? I do. 320 00:19:18,760 --> 00:19:23,240 Speaker 1: Can you do that? Yes you can. Will you have 321 00:19:23,320 --> 00:19:26,040 Speaker 1: a cheer squad? Probably not? In fact, I kind of 322 00:19:26,040 --> 00:19:30,680 Speaker 1: hope not. You know, And this sounds harsh. Maybe the 323 00:19:30,680 --> 00:19:32,639 Speaker 1: odd person here and there, or one person in your 324 00:19:32,680 --> 00:19:37,040 Speaker 1: corner great. But here's my thing about cheer squads. People 325 00:19:37,040 --> 00:19:40,639 Speaker 1: become dependent on them. And when you're dependent on the 326 00:19:40,720 --> 00:19:44,800 Speaker 1: cheer squad, the backslappers, the trophies, the accolades, the validation, 327 00:19:45,160 --> 00:19:48,320 Speaker 1: the approval, the round of applause for eating a fucking salad, 328 00:19:49,680 --> 00:19:52,040 Speaker 1: you know, the standing ovation for getting out of bed. 329 00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:56,000 Speaker 1: You're empowering them, not empowering you. And now you're just 330 00:19:56,040 --> 00:19:58,800 Speaker 1: creating a new dependency. You're creating a new addiction, a 331 00:19:58,800 --> 00:20:04,640 Speaker 1: new problem. If you have a cheer squat, great, I'm 332 00:20:04,640 --> 00:20:08,640 Speaker 1: not against them, not a big fan support encouragement, yes, 333 00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:14,240 Speaker 1: but this over the top kind of bullshitty. Everyone's a 334 00:20:14,280 --> 00:20:18,600 Speaker 1: fucking winner. Everyone's not a winner. Everyone's not We're not 335 00:20:18,680 --> 00:20:21,639 Speaker 1: all fucking winners. There have been many, many times in 336 00:20:21,680 --> 00:20:23,560 Speaker 1: my life where I have not been a winner. I've 337 00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:26,639 Speaker 1: been a dumbass, I've made bad choices. And we're not 338 00:20:26,680 --> 00:20:31,040 Speaker 1: all fucking special and amazing. We're not. Sometimes we're dickheads, 339 00:20:31,080 --> 00:20:35,119 Speaker 1: sometimes we're brilliant, sometimes we do good things. There's eight 340 00:20:35,320 --> 00:20:38,800 Speaker 1: billion of us on the planet. We're so not fucking special. 341 00:20:40,680 --> 00:20:43,160 Speaker 1: It doesn't mean that you, to your family, though, are 342 00:20:43,240 --> 00:20:45,760 Speaker 1: not special, or that your children to you or your 343 00:20:45,800 --> 00:20:48,680 Speaker 1: partner to you is not special. Of course in that context, yes, 344 00:20:50,119 --> 00:20:54,480 Speaker 1: But winding back the lens or stepping back in the 345 00:20:54,560 --> 00:20:59,879 Speaker 1: global context, in the group context, we're just another an 346 00:21:00,080 --> 00:21:03,439 Speaker 1: other fucking human on the big spinning blue ball. And 347 00:21:03,480 --> 00:21:06,680 Speaker 1: that's not good or bad. That's just what we are. 348 00:21:09,119 --> 00:21:11,240 Speaker 1: And so we are born with certain amount of time 349 00:21:11,280 --> 00:21:14,840 Speaker 1: and certain genetics and certain abilities and resources, and that 350 00:21:14,920 --> 00:21:17,320 Speaker 1: stuff we can't change. I can't change where I was 351 00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:19,840 Speaker 1: born out of my hands. Can't change what I was 352 00:21:19,840 --> 00:21:23,199 Speaker 1: born with, who my parents were, can't change my programming, 353 00:21:23,280 --> 00:21:26,600 Speaker 1: my conditioning. I can't change the things that happened to 354 00:21:26,640 --> 00:21:30,359 Speaker 1: me up until today. I can't change them. I can't 355 00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:34,480 Speaker 1: change what anyone else does. I don't want to. I 356 00:21:34,560 --> 00:21:37,560 Speaker 1: can't change the fact that bad things happen to good people, 357 00:21:37,600 --> 00:21:41,400 Speaker 1: that pain and suffering will be a fucking ever present 358 00:21:41,880 --> 00:21:45,600 Speaker 1: component of the human experience. I can't change any of that. 359 00:21:45,680 --> 00:21:47,760 Speaker 1: But in the middle of all of that, I get 360 00:21:47,800 --> 00:21:50,600 Speaker 1: to choose what I do with my time, with my talent, 361 00:21:51,280 --> 00:21:55,399 Speaker 1: with my relationships. I get to make hard choices, do 362 00:21:55,520 --> 00:21:59,840 Speaker 1: hard things, and create good outcomes. I get to optimize 363 00:21:59,840 --> 00:22:04,679 Speaker 1: my natural ability and talent by choice or waste it 364 00:22:05,359 --> 00:22:09,520 Speaker 1: by choice. I can't change the fact that you and 365 00:22:09,560 --> 00:22:12,320 Speaker 1: I have twenty four hours a day, the same allocation 366 00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:15,760 Speaker 1: you and me every day, fourteen hundred and forty minutes. 367 00:22:17,040 --> 00:22:21,000 Speaker 1: But how you choose, how you choose to use Wow, 368 00:22:21,080 --> 00:22:24,080 Speaker 1: say that ten times. How you choose to use your 369 00:22:24,080 --> 00:22:26,960 Speaker 1: fourteen hundred and forty minutes is the thing. What I 370 00:22:27,080 --> 00:22:30,760 Speaker 1: do with my time is the thing. Ah, But I'm busy, yep, 371 00:22:30,800 --> 00:22:34,439 Speaker 1: me too, I'm busy too. I work full time, I 372 00:22:34,480 --> 00:22:36,920 Speaker 1: study full time, I travel, I do lots of shit, 373 00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:39,520 Speaker 1: and I'm not looking for accolades because I'm not special 374 00:22:39,520 --> 00:22:41,760 Speaker 1: and what I do is not special. I'm just busy. 375 00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:44,560 Speaker 1: But in the middle of the busy, I still make 376 00:22:44,600 --> 00:22:48,000 Speaker 1: decisions with which align with who and how I want 377 00:22:48,040 --> 00:22:50,120 Speaker 1: to be. I still eat the way, I still don't drink, 378 00:22:50,160 --> 00:22:52,400 Speaker 1: I still don't use drugs. I still train every day, 379 00:22:52,760 --> 00:22:56,200 Speaker 1: I still eat good food. And all of those things 380 00:22:56,280 --> 00:22:58,760 Speaker 1: don't make me special at all. I'm not special. All 381 00:22:58,760 --> 00:23:04,840 Speaker 1: of those things are just byproducts of my choices. And 382 00:23:05,040 --> 00:23:10,120 Speaker 1: is it easy to navigate life by making tough choices 383 00:23:10,320 --> 00:23:15,640 Speaker 1: and the right choices? Is it? No? It's not. It's 384 00:23:15,760 --> 00:23:21,119 Speaker 1: just not. Is it easy to you know, to listen 385 00:23:21,160 --> 00:23:25,119 Speaker 1: to this and then to actually go and fucking do something, 386 00:23:25,920 --> 00:23:29,399 Speaker 1: not just go, oh, yeah, that resonated, that's good. Yeah cool. 387 00:23:30,520 --> 00:23:33,000 Speaker 1: I love that that you like this. If you like it, 388 00:23:33,080 --> 00:23:35,080 Speaker 1: I love it that it resonates. I love it that 389 00:23:35,160 --> 00:23:37,480 Speaker 1: it may be a fucking light bulb. I love all 390 00:23:37,520 --> 00:23:41,520 Speaker 1: of that. But none of that shit will make one 391 00:23:41,840 --> 00:23:44,960 Speaker 1: bit of positive difference in your life, none of it 392 00:23:45,160 --> 00:23:49,679 Speaker 1: unless you do something because it's in the doing of 393 00:23:49,840 --> 00:23:54,359 Speaker 1: the something that you change, and then when you change, 394 00:23:54,359 --> 00:23:56,880 Speaker 1: and then when your life changes, and then when you 395 00:23:56,960 --> 00:24:01,280 Speaker 1: make those you make those decisions which lead to this 396 00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:05,440 Speaker 1: better version, this better reality, these better outcomes. I didn't 397 00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:09,200 Speaker 1: do what you did. It's always you. You are the problem, 398 00:24:09,320 --> 00:24:14,080 Speaker 1: you are the solution. I'm just a resource. I'm just 399 00:24:14,080 --> 00:24:17,600 Speaker 1: a bloke who happens in your ears every so often. 400 00:24:19,480 --> 00:24:24,359 Speaker 1: You are not a character in anyone else's play. You 401 00:24:24,440 --> 00:24:27,000 Speaker 1: are the author of your own story. You are the 402 00:24:27,040 --> 00:24:32,160 Speaker 1: reality creator. You are the decision maker. Make some decisions, 403 00:24:32,800 --> 00:24:38,080 Speaker 1: hard decisions. Don't fuck around anymore. Don't bullshit yourself, don't 404 00:24:38,119 --> 00:24:42,440 Speaker 1: bullshit others. Don't believe your own stories. I'm not saying 405 00:24:42,520 --> 00:24:45,879 Speaker 1: be reckless. I'm not saying doing anything, do anything dangerous. 406 00:24:47,520 --> 00:24:50,959 Speaker 1: I'm saying, if you want to be strong, resilient, if 407 00:24:51,000 --> 00:24:53,760 Speaker 1: you want to produce a don't let another week go 408 00:24:53,840 --> 00:24:57,040 Speaker 1: where you just fuck around in a holding pattern where 409 00:24:57,080 --> 00:24:59,720 Speaker 1: you just wait for the next week or the next month, 410 00:24:59,800 --> 00:25:02,919 Speaker 1: or the next opportunity or the you'll wake up in 411 00:25:02,960 --> 00:25:05,480 Speaker 1: a minute, you'll be it'll be twenty twenty five, and 412 00:25:05,520 --> 00:25:09,200 Speaker 1: you'll be like, fuck, remember when Craig said that, see 413 00:25:09,240 --> 00:25:09,760 Speaker 1: you next time.