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Speaker 1: Apogae Production. Welcome to the She Rises Podcast. I'm Ashy

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Speaker 1: and I'm Tiana.

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Speaker 2: This podcast is about female empowerment and encouraging you to

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Speaker 2: be your biggest, boldest, and most authentic version of yourself.

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Speaker 1: We help you shed the shame, grow to a new level.

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Speaker 1: We're gonna laugh, cry, and talk about the topics everyone

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Speaker 1: else is too afraid to talk about. Get ready for

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Speaker 1: your next level of self. Hello everybody, Welcome back to

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Speaker 1: she Rises. We have a bit of a funny episode.

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Speaker 1: Oh here we go. This episode idea stem from a

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Speaker 1: DM that we got asking if we ever fight, And

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Speaker 1: at first we were like, no, we're fight. We don't argue.

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Speaker 1: Then we're like, actually we do. We do. There's one

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Speaker 1: main thing we argue about it.

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Speaker 2: It bothers me so bad. I get like riled up

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Speaker 2: about it.

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Speaker 1: And I just laugh and then get awkward, like I

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Speaker 1: don't know what you have to say. I'm not going

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Speaker 1: to agree with you. It's so funny, it sounds so silly.

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Speaker 1: But we also think there's like context around this and

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Speaker 1: just just I'm cool messaging behind why we wanted to

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Speaker 1: bring this in. It's not just to laugh about it,

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Speaker 1: talk about We've got some points that we want to

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Speaker 1: talk about that brought up this whole conversation. So the

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Speaker 1: whole ongoing argument is Tanna thinks that I can't take compliments.

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Speaker 1: I can. There's just some that I don't believe, and

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Speaker 1: some I think she's just gassing me up to try

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Speaker 1: to make me feel better or to make me feel good. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: or she's got her rose colored glasses on, because you know,

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Speaker 1: when you love someone, you then think they're more attractive

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Speaker 1: than what they ask, like beer goggles, you know.

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Speaker 2: Oh babe, No, but like I genuinely believe it because

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Speaker 2: it's so funny, right, I'll like, I know, now, I

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Speaker 2: don't want to give you a compliment, like she goes

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Speaker 2: real quiet, like you go real quiet. So I'll give

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Speaker 2: you a compliment gas you up, and I know when

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Speaker 2: you're not gonna believe it, because you'll be talking about

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Speaker 2: it like no, and then I'll say something to like

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Speaker 2: compliment you or to like reassure you, and then she

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Speaker 2: will go and you won't hear a.

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Speaker 1: Thing because I've always we end up in an argument and

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Speaker 1: then I'm like, I'm stopping this before. No.

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Speaker 2: It frustrates me though, Like there have been times where

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Speaker 2: we've had this conversation, and it genuinely because I wouldn't

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Speaker 2: say something just for the sake of saying it if

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Speaker 2: I didn't genuinely believe it. So I'm like, first of all,

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Speaker 2: I'm not lying to because she literally says, you're fucking

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Speaker 2: lying to me, and I'm like, I'm not fucking lying

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Speaker 2: to you. And it's just so funny because I'm like,

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Speaker 2: I don't believe it's like rose colored glasses. I just

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Speaker 2: genuinely see you in such a beautiful light. I find

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Speaker 2: you like so beautiful, not only externally but also internally.

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Speaker 2: You're a beautiful human. You're also hot as fuck.

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Speaker 1: See here we go.

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Speaker 2: You're gonna You're gonna get it in real time.

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Speaker 1: Don't you think that someone If someone's so beautiful on

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Speaker 1: the outside and they're an absolute asshole or bitch or

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Speaker 1: they treat someone with disrespect, they're not pretty anymore. It

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Speaker 1: takes away their looks. Yeah, that's just this one is

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Speaker 1: a beautiful fucking soul. You can't fault anything about what

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Speaker 1: they look like. They're just beautiful. They're radiating this aura

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Speaker 1: of kindness and love and lie that you just like

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Speaker 1: you were so beautiful. So I think that's how you

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Speaker 1: view me. You think I'm beautiful because of who I am.

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Speaker 2: But from like a surface level standpoint, I also think

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Speaker 2: you're beautiful.

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Speaker 1: Do you know what I mean? Like on the outside,

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Speaker 1: I think of your eyes. Check. No, you know what

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Speaker 1: I said to Steve the other day. You know that

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Speaker 1: girl we saw him Burley. I don't know if you're

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Speaker 1: gonna remember her along my ammy, and she was super tan.

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Speaker 1: She was in like a berry set. She had like

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Speaker 1: honey blonde hair. Oh my gosh, yeah, she stopped us

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Speaker 1: in our track. I do remember. We both looked no

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Speaker 1: better than a man. Honestly. I saw her again with

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Speaker 1: Steve and I was walking. I was like, Steve, this

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Speaker 1: girl coming up, Oh my gosh, she is stunning. He's like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: she's a babe. And I got really sad. I was like, oh,

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Speaker 1: I said to Steve. Looks at him, and I was like, gosh,

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Speaker 1: wouldn't it be so much nicer for you to wake

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Speaker 1: up and look at that face instead of oh fame?

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Speaker 1: Truly though, wouldn't you love to wake up and look

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Speaker 1: at that face. He's also married, and it's like, I

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Speaker 1: choose this woman. Yeah, I love your face, but she's beautiful. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: she just even her hair.

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Speaker 2: I'm like, God, I don't ever really want to be blonde,

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Speaker 2: and that girl makes me want to be blonde.

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Speaker 1: She was so hot, Not that I ever clue, but

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Speaker 1: you could go blonde. No, I think he could. My

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Speaker 1: eyebrows are way too dark for that. I think too.

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Speaker 1: A bit of this stems from I still get compared

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Speaker 1: to all of my friends to this day. I get

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Speaker 1: compared to you every second day. Always been compared to

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Speaker 1: my other friends. Growing up, I felt like the ugly

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Speaker 1: duckling out of my group, and I was like, you're

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Speaker 1: just so naturally beautiful. Because I feel like I have

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Speaker 1: to have a fake tan, my hair's gotta be done.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna wear a lot of makeup, please, I'd be

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Speaker 1: that catfish girl if I had a one night stand

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Speaker 1: I wipe my makeup off. They'd wake up and be.

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Speaker 2: Like, you know, it's crazy, Like I hear this, and

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Speaker 2: I'm just like, girl, like are you blind? Like I

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Speaker 2: think you need to get your eyes checked because I'm like,

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Speaker 2: this doesn't make sense in my brain.

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Speaker 1: You know, you and Steve are the same, and Steve

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Speaker 1: thinks that, Like we walk into the gym and every

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Speaker 1: guy just like hits on us straight away. I'm like, no,

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Speaker 1: they look at her. They don't look at me like

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Speaker 1: I watch the eyes do the last person that hit

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Speaker 1: on me? I canna tell you a story. I think

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Speaker 1: I've told you the last person that hit on me. Okay,

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Speaker 1: hear this out, I'll paint the picture. I wish I

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Speaker 1: still got hit on to know that I've still got it.

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Speaker 1: But I don't get hit on by men. Leave unless

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Speaker 1: it's to my DMS or on Snapchat. There's a lot

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Speaker 1: of Indian meen that hit on me on Snapchat. They

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Speaker 1: are persistent, aren't they. They're very forward. They are treaty woman.

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Speaker 2: Right or an Indian man will honestly.

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Speaker 1: Oh anyways, Okay, I'm at the show. My mom's down visiting.

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Speaker 1: It's about six months ago. I'm at the shops doing

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Speaker 1: our groceries. I've got Tala, my daughter. There's three generations

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Speaker 1: of us. We're going to the butcher and I can

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Speaker 1: see this guy outside. He's a bit older, and you

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Speaker 1: guys know, I like older men, but not this old,

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Speaker 1: this sixty five. He's chilling on the chair and as

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Speaker 1: we walk past, he kind of smiles at me, but

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Speaker 1: like creepy smile. I'm like, okay, you know, just a

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Speaker 1: nice friendly smile.

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Speaker 2: I do.

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Speaker 1: I smile at everyone. Hop in the car. I turn

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Speaker 1: around to give Tyler something. Next minute, knock, knock, knock

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Speaker 1: my window. I'm like, turn around, he's there. He's at

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Speaker 1: my fucking window, and I'm like, oh my gosh. And

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Speaker 1: he is completely off his face, like he is on drugs.

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Speaker 1: Like my mom's like, do not wind the window down.

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Speaker 1: I wound it down just a little bit because I

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Speaker 1: was curious. I'm like, hello, passes me a piece of paper,

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Speaker 1: says call me sometime as he's chewing his fucking draw

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Speaker 1: off and can't look at me properly because he's that

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Speaker 1: off his face and drunk. Oh, I have my daughter

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Speaker 1: in the back seat and my mom next to me. Oh,

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Speaker 1: that's terrifying. That's where I get hit on bike. Not

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Speaker 1: so hot, Nral player, that's so good. I've drunk sixty

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Speaker 1: five year old homeless man at the local shopping center.

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Speaker 2: That's not a good piece of evidence, babe, that's the

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Speaker 2: evidence I have. That's not a good piece of evidence.

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Speaker 1: That's the evidence.

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Speaker 2: Now. I'm like, I probably hit on you more than that, Amanda.

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Speaker 1: I do you do and I love it. I think

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Speaker 1: you're beautiful. But I also wanted to bring in the

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Speaker 1: conversation because I think in today's society, especially on social media,

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Speaker 1: there is so much put on women to look perfect

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Speaker 1: and so much pressure to look a certain way, and

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Speaker 1: it's not actually that important to be beautiful. It's the

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Speaker 1: least interesting thing about a person. I believe a beautiful

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Speaker 1: person is their heart. Yeah, It's how they're contributing to

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Speaker 1: the community. It's how they treat their loved ones. It's

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Speaker 1: the impact they're making. That's what's important to me. So

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Speaker 1: even though I reject some compliments, I don't want anyone

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Speaker 1: listening to this thing, oh actually hates herself. It's not

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Speaker 1: that I feel like I'm just a realist. I know

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Speaker 1: I'm not fucking Miranda curR looking. I'm just who I am.

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Speaker 1: That's not what I choose to put my focus on. Yes,

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Speaker 1: I want to feel confident and I want to feel

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Speaker 1: beautiful and I put makeup on, but it's also not

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Speaker 1: what I'm gonna lose sleepover at night. It's not that important,

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Speaker 1: for sure.

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Speaker 2: But I think what gets me is like, I care

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Speaker 2: about you and I love you, and then I'm like

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Speaker 2: when I see you reject those compliments. Sometimes I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 2: I just like love for her to be able to

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Speaker 2: like truly believe that about herself. And I'm not saying

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Speaker 2: you need to feel like mirandac Hea or whatever.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, I fucking don't. Like.

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Speaker 2: There are women that I look at on social media

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Speaker 2: and I'm like, wow, like to look like that would

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Speaker 2: be insane. And also I feel like I had a

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Speaker 2: phase what I felt like the ugly duckling as well.

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Speaker 2: I literally used to get bullied from year two to

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Speaker 2: year five because I was like the chubby girl, like

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Speaker 2: chubbier than the other girls, and I had like pimples

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Speaker 2: on my face, and then at one point I had

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Speaker 2: braces too, so it was like they were all of

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Speaker 2: these things that were just like that I would like

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Speaker 2: get shit on, you know, even like when I was younger,

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Speaker 2: I fucking mono brow babe.

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Speaker 1: You know, take away you can take away acne, you

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Speaker 1: can take away braces, you can take away a mono brown.

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Speaker 1: How someone naturally genetically looks. I got a massive I

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Speaker 1: gotta get up a for it. A few you would die.

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Speaker 1: I had acne, I had braces, you would die, you know.

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Speaker 1: I feel like it's things most people go, like every

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Speaker 1: teenager I know had braces and had acne. But you

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Speaker 1: know what I mean, But you're naturally pretty. You were

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Speaker 1: naturally a beautiful person.

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Speaker 2: I appreciate their babe. But when I was at that age, like,

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Speaker 2: I didn't think that, do you know what I mean?

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Speaker 2: And I think even to like a couple of years ago,

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Speaker 2: like I didn't feel that. I felt so insecure a

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Speaker 2: couple of years ago that I would literally faced you

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Speaker 2: my photos.

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Speaker 1: But everyone told you you had pretty privilege and you

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Speaker 1: thought people only want to be with you because you're sexy,

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Speaker 1: so you know that you're beautiful. Is I never got

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Speaker 1: used for what.

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Speaker 2: I looked like, yeah, I see, I see money.

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Speaker 1: Maybe you're following cloud see you see what you're saying.

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Speaker 2: But also with men, it was more of like a

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Speaker 2: because I objectified myself.

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Speaker 1: That was like a me thing.

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Speaker 2: That wasn't because I thought they liked the way that

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Speaker 2: I looked at It was because I lived with sexual energy.

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Speaker 2: So I felt like it was because I was giving

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Speaker 2: off a flirty, playful energy. They were like, oh this

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Speaker 2: is okay, which I created. Yeah, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 2: So that's where it comes from. But I'm just like,

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Speaker 2: I just want you to one day.

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Speaker 1: But yeah, I do sometimes and sometimes myself sick. That's

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Speaker 1: some of these. I put on an outfit and I

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Speaker 1: look at the round.

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Speaker 2: Like you're like, actually, can we get some photos?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm like, can you take some more photos? Look

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Speaker 1: really good today? Yeah, it's true. Actually I don't hate myself.

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Speaker 1: I don't hate what I look like. I'm just a

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Speaker 1: realist that I'm not a soupermodel, and I prefer to

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Speaker 1: put energy into who I am as a person and

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Speaker 1: let that shine through. But it's just like this episode

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Speaker 1: is just funny, Like it is the most ongoing argument

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Speaker 1: because I would feel as frustrated as you do too. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: if I have friends that can't take compliments and I

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Speaker 1: see them like that, Like Josy's like that, I think

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Speaker 1: she's so beautiful and she really struggles to take a compliment,

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Speaker 1: and I can see how frustrating that is. But I

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Speaker 1: think you also see the times. So I do love

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Speaker 1: myst So it's like, well balanced, No, it's funny. It

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Speaker 1: is funny.

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Speaker 2: No, I just feel like, next time that you compliment me,

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna be like, no, baby, I don't believe you're

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Speaker 2: lying and you're gonna be like they're taking yourself in

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Speaker 2: like you do, believe me. I just look good today.

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Speaker 2: I feel good today.

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Speaker 1: Oh so funny. No, it's just funny.

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Speaker 2: I think when you love someone the way that I

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Speaker 2: love you are, it's got a really emotional no.

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Speaker 1: But you know what I mean, Like when you love

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Speaker 1: your people, you just like.

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Speaker 2: Through the faults. You don't see like everything is perfect. No,

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Speaker 2: it's just you do. You see them in such a

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Speaker 2: beautiful light. So like when you see you have conversations

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Speaker 2: like this. You know, let's say, for example, we had

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Speaker 2: a conversation the other week and we've got triggered, right.

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Speaker 2: We spoke about this in a previous episode, and I

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Speaker 2: felt like my work was really overwhelming and like I

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Speaker 2: couldn't simplify things enough. And I had that like almost

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Speaker 2: like that insecurity, not almost I did. I had that insecurity,

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Speaker 2: like all my work is too overwhelming, this isn't good enough,

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Speaker 2: and you're like, Babe, your work is so good, and

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Speaker 2: like you were telling me those things, but I wasn't

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Speaker 2: absorbing it.

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Speaker 1: So it's similar.

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Speaker 2: I also know what it feels like to be on

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Speaker 2: the other side of that and to not truly believe it.

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Speaker 2: But when you care about somebody so much, you're just like,

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Speaker 2: ohish you could see yourself in my eyes and the

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Speaker 2: way that I see you, because my God like you

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Speaker 2: would just think you're like God's gift Earth, you know,

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Speaker 2: And on a good day we do.

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Speaker 1: But yeah, and I've spoken about this many times before,

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Speaker 1: but there is that added layer of being online. You

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Speaker 1: do get compared. We even had that, Remember that guy

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Speaker 1: that commented he like wrote on my page and everyone

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Speaker 1: was so beautiful and stuck up for me, and it

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Speaker 1: was so nice, but it was like your best is

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Speaker 1: way hotter, You're the playing Jane version or something. I

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Speaker 1: was like, oh mate, I fuck, I know you enough

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Speaker 1: to tell me, no, how are you commenting this? You

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Speaker 1: know what I mean? Like, it's just another layer, like

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Speaker 1: if I already feel that, and then other people are

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Speaker 1: constantly comparing me, and you're ten years younger than me

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Speaker 1: as well, so I feel everyone wants to point that out.

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Speaker 1: And I don't know why they actively want to tell

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Speaker 1: me that, but yes, there's a very small percentage that

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Speaker 1: that plays into my insecurities. It's like I'm already feeling saggier, older,

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Speaker 1: not as attractive, and then you have to remind me

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Speaker 1: every day. So there's like definitely that element of being

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Speaker 1: online that makes it harder to push through. Yeah, feeling confident.

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Speaker 1: But that's why, even more so, why I go back

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Speaker 1: to like who I am, how I'm helping women, how

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Speaker 1: I show up, how I treat other people, impact of

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Speaker 1: making on the world. I lean on that rather than

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Speaker 1: like dwelling in everyone comparing me to you or to

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Speaker 1: anyone else, you know, God, and so that happens.

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Speaker 2: It's so shit when I see comments like that, because

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Speaker 2: I'm just like, what for, Like, we're not here to

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Speaker 2: be we're not in competition compare ourselves to each other,

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Speaker 2: Like we're here to like come together and like bring

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Speaker 2: the table of plautiful us together.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, together that we are even more empowering and more

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Speaker 1: impactful and more fun and more fun beautiful. No, honestly,

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Speaker 1: it's better to get better to get that. Well, please

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Speaker 1: moss more love.

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Speaker 2: No, It's true, though, it just doesn't make sense to

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Speaker 2: me when people do that, because I'm like, why for

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Speaker 2: what reason do you think it's okay for one to

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Speaker 2: go onto somebody else's page and compare them to someone

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Speaker 2: they're posting with someone who's very important to them in

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Speaker 2: their lives and make it about the way that they

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Speaker 2: look or why that's such an important thing or on

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Speaker 2: their list of things. Yeah, Like what makes it okay

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Speaker 2: in your eyes to like even bring focus to something

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Speaker 2: like that when it's actually not about that at all?

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Speaker 1: Like what about the impact?

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Speaker 2: Like literally, what about all the things that we've done

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Speaker 2: in the last year, what about all of the women

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Speaker 2: who have dmd us saying, Oh my gosh, you don't

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Speaker 2: understand how incredible this podcast episode was, or how incredible

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Speaker 2: Rise in Side is. You know, it's like, never about that.

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Speaker 1: I've forgot to tell you how a girl message the

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Speaker 1: other day and she said she swiped up to something

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Speaker 1: were doing and she goes, how do you let your

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Speaker 1: husband be in the same room as her?

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Speaker 2: Oh?

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh my gosh, I remember setting her

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Speaker 1: have some voice messages And I said, you know what,

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Speaker 1: I would put Steve in a room of one hundred strippers,

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Speaker 1: escorts and Tiana and all of my friends and I

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Speaker 1: wouldn't blink because I trust him and I trust my friends.

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Speaker 1: What do you mean, Wow, you went for a walk

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Speaker 1: with Steve recently without me? Like that doesn't even cross

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Speaker 1: my mind. But then I thought, gosh, imagine if she

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Speaker 1: sent this to someone whose relationship was crack it like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: for sure, and something had happened, And then it brings

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Speaker 1: up this insecurity because you know what that's gonna happen,

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Speaker 1: is going to affect their friendship. Oh absolutely. I was like, Wow,

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Speaker 1: that's really interesting that I thought. Fuck, something must have

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Speaker 1: happened to her in her past for her to have

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Speaker 1: that assumption or projection that you shouldn't be in the

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Speaker 1: same room as my husband. I don't even think of that.

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Speaker 1: When you guys are together, it's like a burro, and

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Speaker 1: cis dynamic and friendship. There's not one part of me

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Speaker 1: that's like, oh my god, like I love looking at

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Speaker 1: her ass. Oh my god. Even if he did, I

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Speaker 1: wouldn't fucking blame me stuff. But he wouldn't even anyway, look,

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Speaker 1: oh my god.

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Speaker 2: Wouldn't even But it's just like it's a friendship and dynamic,

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Speaker 2: and I love Steve because I love you. I love

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Speaker 2: your dynamic together, and he's like, you know, I feel

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Speaker 2: like it's like one big like family, you know what

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Speaker 2: I mean. Like I love your kids like they're my own,

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Speaker 2: and like I love Steve like a family member, you know.

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Speaker 1: So it's just so losty And also you can see why.

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Speaker 2: You know, people's insecurities and why they would say something

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Speaker 2: like that because maybe there's a belief there that like

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Speaker 2: men can't control themselves or women trusted.

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Speaker 1: Yeah yeah that and have that trust thing yeah going

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Speaker 1: on with her. But yeah, yeah, I know, I'm like not,

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Speaker 1: I've been here, no way, so I would that would

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Speaker 1: just yeah, maybe call me naive, but I think that

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Speaker 1: would ever happen.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And also as well, like if you know me

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Speaker 2: as a person, like you test Steve as a person.

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Speaker 1: Like integrity not it's not it intiquity morals, but yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's just it's interesting the outside noise that doesn't bother

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Speaker 1: me at all, but being constantly compared definitely plays its little, yeah,

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Speaker 1: little roles. But yeah, just that was an interesting topic

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Speaker 1: to bring up.

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Speaker 2: And you know what, as well, I think there have

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Speaker 2: been even moments throughout the journey where like I've compared

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Speaker 2: myself to you or you've compared myself means.

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Speaker 1: Things, Yeah, let's talk about that. Yeah, I think this

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Speaker 1: is good. And you guys are literally on the couch

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Speaker 1: having a conversation. This is not a friend yeah, which

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Speaker 1: was beautiful because I love these honest, open conversations. But

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Speaker 1: this doesn't just comparisons. Isn't just about looks. You've had

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Speaker 1: things come up around careers and following and experience. So

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Speaker 1: I'm like, I do you want to share? Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Absolutely, So our podcast producers, like they you know, were

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Speaker 2: asking if we wanted to go on another podcast to

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Speaker 2: you know, collaborate with other podcasts and things like that.

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Speaker 2: And then our podcast producers came back and said, basically,

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Speaker 2: this podcast, ashually they want you on, but they want

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Speaker 2: you on solo and not as a duo. And just

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Speaker 2: in that moment, like my little girl inside was like, oh,

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Speaker 2: like you're not important enough.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you know.

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Speaker 2: And I even brought this into Ashy and I was like, oh, babe,

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Speaker 2: like I noticed like a bit of a trigger here,

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Speaker 2: Like I was comparing myself like to you and what

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Speaker 2: you've built and it's fifteen years you've been online, and

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Speaker 2: in that moment, I felt like, oh, like I'm maybe

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Speaker 2: not significant of a person enough to you know, want

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Speaker 2: for these people to want me on there as well.

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Speaker 2: And just in that moment, and I like took it

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Speaker 2: so personally and I was just like, oh, like making

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Speaker 2: it mean something about me when in actual fact, like

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00:16:10,081 --> 00:16:12,921
Speaker 2: it's not. That's actually just a deeper wound of me

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Speaker 2: of what I felt in the past is not feeling

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Speaker 2: important enough, not feeling special enough, you know.

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Speaker 1: And I think anyone listening would feel exactly the same.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And like that's just what came up for me

401
00:16:22,121 --> 00:16:23,761
Speaker 2: in the moment. So that's how it's kind of come

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00:16:23,841 --> 00:16:28,201
Speaker 2: up for me with Ashy and with you. And yeah,

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00:16:28,281 --> 00:16:29,841
Speaker 2: as if in something that's like come up for you.

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00:16:30,161 --> 00:16:34,441
Speaker 1: There's been even in business, different roles or experiences and yeah,

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Speaker 1: like this shows up, yeah, which I think is a

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Speaker 1: beautiful thing. Like when I've spoken to Steve about it,

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Speaker 1: he's like, yeah, but it's so good because you both

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Speaker 1: have experience in different areas of the business relationship and

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00:16:44,961 --> 00:16:46,561
Speaker 1: where you guys are growing and what you're doing with

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Speaker 1: products verse online versus coaching versus the Rise Inside, that

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Speaker 1: you both have what's needed to bring it together. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you would struggle to do this on your own because

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Speaker 1: of what Tiana has and you don't have and vice versa. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: actually really beautiful. But there's definitely moments like in Rise

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Speaker 1: Inside where I'm like, oh my gosh, I can't explain

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00:17:03,281 --> 00:17:04,801
Speaker 1: that as well as you like you just do it,

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Speaker 1: and you're like, absolutely fucking not. Yeah, there was one

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Speaker 1: we did have this conversation. It's like, yeah, but you

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00:17:09,961 --> 00:17:12,041
Speaker 1: just explained it so much better and you're so much

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Speaker 1: smarter than me, and all those things started to come

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Speaker 1: up and you were like, no, we're doing this together.

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Speaker 1: How long it takes, I don't care how many times

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Speaker 1: you just stuff up, like you're sitting beside me, we're

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Speaker 1: doing this. Yeah, and we did you know, so, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that comes up for me too. Sometimes they're old like

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Speaker 1: I'm not smart enough. But she's a coach. She does

427
00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:28,641
Speaker 1: this every single day of her life. And you're like, yeah,

428
00:17:28,681 --> 00:17:31,481
Speaker 1: but you've been online giving advice of fifteen years. We're

429
00:17:31,521 --> 00:17:32,041
Speaker 1: just humans.

430
00:17:32,201 --> 00:17:34,400
Speaker 2: We are we are, and we have moments like this,

431
00:17:34,441 --> 00:17:36,161
Speaker 2: but we hold each other so beautifully in it, and

432
00:17:36,241 --> 00:17:38,440
Speaker 2: even like for me on the opposite side of that

433
00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:40,161
Speaker 2: is like you have that story for me. But then

434
00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:42,521
Speaker 2: coming onto the podcast, I was like, oh my god, Ash,

435
00:17:42,561 --> 00:17:45,360
Speaker 2: she is literally the best storyteller. Like when you storytell

436
00:17:45,400 --> 00:17:47,321
Speaker 2: I'm like so locked in and she explains it so

437
00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:49,401
Speaker 2: beautifully and I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm so bad

438
00:17:49,441 --> 00:17:51,880
Speaker 2: at that. I haven't had to learn that skill or

439
00:17:52,001 --> 00:17:53,721
Speaker 2: be good at it because it wasn't something that came

440
00:17:53,801 --> 00:17:54,440
Speaker 2: naturally to me.

441
00:17:54,721 --> 00:17:57,001
Speaker 1: You're more coaching, I'm coaching education.

442
00:17:57,120 --> 00:17:58,801
Speaker 2: Yet I feel like I'm a bit more logical in

443
00:17:58,801 --> 00:18:00,680
Speaker 2: that sense, like for me personally, the way that I

444
00:18:00,721 --> 00:18:03,801
Speaker 2: explain things and comes from a logical standpoint, whereas yours

445
00:18:03,880 --> 00:18:05,680
Speaker 2: is like experienced storytelling and it's a bit more of

446
00:18:05,721 --> 00:18:10,561
Speaker 2: like a feminine way of telling stories. Yeah, emotional, So yeah,

447
00:18:10,600 --> 00:18:12,281
Speaker 2: I remember feeling really insecure about that.

448
00:18:12,321 --> 00:18:12,681
Speaker 1: At first.

449
00:18:12,681 --> 00:18:14,001
Speaker 2: I was like, oh my gosh, like I'm just not

450
00:18:14,041 --> 00:18:15,680
Speaker 2: as good as her, and that I like, I can't

451
00:18:15,921 --> 00:18:18,481
Speaker 2: measure up to that, you know. And then we would

452
00:18:18,481 --> 00:18:20,281
Speaker 2: have conversations about it and we would bring it into

453
00:18:20,321 --> 00:18:21,961
Speaker 2: each other and be like, but we're not trying to

454
00:18:22,001 --> 00:18:24,001
Speaker 2: become each other. I should be like, well, I want

455
00:18:24,001 --> 00:18:25,521
Speaker 2: to be more like you in this, and I was like, well,

456
00:18:25,561 --> 00:18:26,960
Speaker 2: I want to be more like you in this, and

457
00:18:26,961 --> 00:18:29,321
Speaker 2: we were like, oh, wait, wait a minute. We're not

458
00:18:29,521 --> 00:18:31,880
Speaker 2: trying to mess it to one person. We're trying to

459
00:18:31,880 --> 00:18:34,680
Speaker 2: be two individuals who come together to bring and create

460
00:18:34,721 --> 00:18:35,761
Speaker 2: something really special.

461
00:18:35,921 --> 00:18:37,720
Speaker 1: And once again, people might connect with the way I

462
00:18:38,080 --> 00:18:41,001
Speaker 1: teach and not you, and then vice versa. They're like, oh,

463
00:18:41,041 --> 00:18:44,721
Speaker 1: as she's like waffling on, oh no, no, the facts and therefore,

464
00:18:44,880 --> 00:18:45,960
Speaker 1: but but you know what I mean, they want to

465
00:18:46,120 --> 00:18:49,521
Speaker 1: understand on a deeper level or more logically. So it's

466
00:18:49,521 --> 00:18:52,441
Speaker 1: cool that we both have strength and weaknesses. And yeah,

467
00:18:52,481 --> 00:18:53,840
Speaker 1: I just wanted to bring all this in because we

468
00:18:53,880 --> 00:18:57,681
Speaker 1: are human and I'm sure something we've said in this episode.

469
00:18:57,961 --> 00:19:00,121
Speaker 1: You listening, you're like, oh my gosh, I do that.

470
00:19:00,481 --> 00:19:02,921
Speaker 1: I compare, I have the insecurity? What do I make

471
00:19:02,961 --> 00:19:05,000
Speaker 1: that mean? How do I like that control my life?

472
00:19:05,321 --> 00:19:07,200
Speaker 1: Can I change the narrator on that? What am I

473
00:19:07,201 --> 00:19:09,681
Speaker 1: focusing on? Because what you focus on is what you're

474
00:19:09,681 --> 00:19:11,680
Speaker 1: going to feel, and when you feel it more, it's

475
00:19:11,721 --> 00:19:14,400
Speaker 1: going to expand. Yeah, so I don't let myself drown

476
00:19:14,481 --> 00:19:17,041
Speaker 1: in the comparison of you or not being pretty enough

477
00:19:17,120 --> 00:19:19,880
Speaker 1: or whatever. I choose to like switch lanes and go

478
00:19:19,961 --> 00:19:21,840
Speaker 1: over here and focus on who I am as a person.

479
00:19:21,921 --> 00:19:23,721
Speaker 2: That's just like went straight arom I like not pretty enough.

480
00:19:23,721 --> 00:19:26,041
Speaker 2: I'm like, seep, you're doing it again. I'm just like

481
00:19:26,721 --> 00:19:30,400
Speaker 2: I can't no, But it is, It's it's just a

482
00:19:30,681 --> 00:19:34,321
Speaker 2: cool conversation to have because it doesn't matter who you are,

483
00:19:34,640 --> 00:19:36,881
Speaker 2: where you are, what you're doing, what you look like,

484
00:19:37,041 --> 00:19:41,161
Speaker 2: what you think of yourself. We all have our own things, yeah,

485
00:19:41,241 --> 00:19:43,840
Speaker 2: things that we highlight about ourselves that we maybe don't like,

486
00:19:43,921 --> 00:19:47,640
Speaker 2: don't love, or don't recognize or whatever the story is.

487
00:19:48,041 --> 00:19:50,041
Speaker 2: But like, no one is exempt from it, no one.

488
00:19:50,080 --> 00:19:51,761
Speaker 2: I think we just wanted to like show you that

489
00:19:52,041 --> 00:19:54,401
Speaker 2: it exists for us too, And there will be things

490
00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:56,160
Speaker 2: that you're going through right now that come up for

491
00:19:56,241 --> 00:19:57,440
Speaker 2: you where you're like, oh, my god, I feel so

492
00:19:57,481 --> 00:19:59,240
Speaker 2: alone in this, but like the reality is like you're not.

493
00:19:59,721 --> 00:20:02,201
Speaker 2: You're not alone in it, you know, especially us being

494
00:20:02,241 --> 00:20:05,001
Speaker 2: on camera together so much in the way that we are.

495
00:20:04,880 --> 00:20:05,961
Speaker 1: Not just on the podcast.

496
00:20:06,041 --> 00:20:07,920
Speaker 2: My god, when we fight over our we both have

497
00:20:07,961 --> 00:20:10,841
Speaker 2: the same good side, right, so when I'm currently sitting.

498
00:20:10,561 --> 00:20:12,400
Speaker 1: In the bad side, right, we take hers and we

499
00:20:12,400 --> 00:20:12,920
Speaker 1: take turns.

500
00:20:13,041 --> 00:20:14,601
Speaker 2: But when we joke about it, we're all like, oh,

501
00:20:14,681 --> 00:20:16,920
Speaker 2: this and that and blah blah blah, like pick ourselves apart,

502
00:20:16,961 --> 00:20:20,680
Speaker 2: because like we're human, right, yes, and we are constantly together.

503
00:20:20,840 --> 00:20:22,840
Speaker 2: So when you're naturally with somebody all the time, you

504
00:20:22,961 --> 00:20:25,561
Speaker 2: start to kind of you don't mean to kind of.

505
00:20:25,521 --> 00:20:27,201
Speaker 1: Oh, I really like this about her.

506
00:20:27,681 --> 00:20:30,041
Speaker 2: I don't have that, Or she looks really good at

507
00:20:30,041 --> 00:20:31,680
Speaker 2: that outfit. Oh wow, that wouldn't look good on me.

508
00:20:31,961 --> 00:20:34,281
Speaker 2: And it just happens. You've really got to be just

509
00:20:34,281 --> 00:20:35,201
Speaker 2: willing to clock.

510
00:20:35,041 --> 00:20:38,080
Speaker 1: It yeah, and also mean anything, not make it mean anything. Yeah,

511
00:20:38,281 --> 00:20:39,880
Speaker 1: bigger than what it needs to be. That's right. Lay

512
00:20:39,880 --> 00:20:41,281
Speaker 1: your self, be human, and it's like, let it be

513
00:20:41,321 --> 00:20:43,441
Speaker 1: seen and then move through it, move through it. I

514
00:20:43,441 --> 00:20:45,120
Speaker 1: imagine too. I don't know. Could you tell me I

515
00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:46,961
Speaker 1: didn't have a sister, yeah, but I remember someone that

516
00:20:47,041 --> 00:20:49,001
Speaker 1: used to work for me. She had a younger sister

517
00:20:49,281 --> 00:20:53,001
Speaker 1: who was an online personality, an influencer. Yeah, And she

518
00:20:53,080 --> 00:20:55,801
Speaker 1: used to always compare herself because her sister was like,

519
00:20:55,840 --> 00:20:58,240
Speaker 1: way skinnier than her, way hotter than her, way more

520
00:20:58,281 --> 00:21:01,761
Speaker 1: successful than her, way more popular than her. And she

521
00:21:01,840 --> 00:21:03,720
Speaker 1: always just felt like she was never enough and was

522
00:21:03,801 --> 00:21:06,960
Speaker 1: constant comparing herself. And I could really feel for her.

523
00:21:06,961 --> 00:21:09,161
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, my gosh, sister that you love so

524
00:21:09,281 --> 00:21:12,281
Speaker 1: much being compared to she felt she had all this

525
00:21:12,360 --> 00:21:15,120
Speaker 1: resentment against her, and she's like, but it's my fucking

526
00:21:15,160 --> 00:21:17,401
Speaker 1: fault that she's skinnier than me, her fault that she's

527
00:21:17,481 --> 00:21:19,240
Speaker 1: growing online and she's doing this and that, and it

528
00:21:19,321 --> 00:21:22,401
Speaker 1: caused a rift between their relationship because her sister obviously

529
00:21:22,441 --> 00:21:23,960
Speaker 1: felt that and was like, fuck, I'm just out he

530
00:21:24,041 --> 00:21:26,520
Speaker 1: lived in my life, be me, and you're you're jealous

531
00:21:26,561 --> 00:21:28,801
Speaker 1: and angry at me for being like this. I don't

532
00:21:28,840 --> 00:21:30,920
Speaker 1: have a sister, but I can imagine that would be

533
00:21:30,921 --> 00:21:32,481
Speaker 1: really difficult. Did you have experience that with any of

534
00:21:32,561 --> 00:21:33,080
Speaker 1: your sisters.

535
00:21:33,120 --> 00:21:34,841
Speaker 2: I love that you brought this up because you got

536
00:21:34,840 --> 00:21:36,360
Speaker 2: three of them. I'm one of five and I have

537
00:21:36,441 --> 00:21:38,281
Speaker 2: three older sisters and a younger brother. So I'm the

538
00:21:38,281 --> 00:21:40,561
Speaker 2: fourth child and I'm the fourth girl. I had this

539
00:21:40,640 --> 00:21:43,280
Speaker 2: with my sister Chantel. I live with my sister. You're

540
00:21:43,360 --> 00:21:46,001
Speaker 2: very close with them, very close, very closely. Always have

541
00:21:46,160 --> 00:21:48,720
Speaker 2: been really close always, but you know, they definitely had

542
00:21:48,761 --> 00:21:49,401
Speaker 2: seasons of our life.

543
00:21:49,441 --> 00:21:50,761
Speaker 1: We're growing up. We were super close.

544
00:21:51,681 --> 00:21:54,120
Speaker 2: She was somebody that I was always really inspired by.

545
00:21:54,321 --> 00:21:57,041
Speaker 2: I loved her style, I loved the way that she thought.

546
00:21:57,080 --> 00:22:00,281
Speaker 2: I love her confidence, herself, leadership. She just was like,

547
00:22:00,681 --> 00:22:03,921
Speaker 2: she's confident, she knows what she wanted, she didn't care. Yeah,

548
00:22:03,961 --> 00:22:08,041
Speaker 2: she's fire. Yeah and yeah, I just I remember always

549
00:22:08,201 --> 00:22:12,640
Speaker 2: comparing my style my the way that I looked my hair,

550
00:22:13,080 --> 00:22:16,241
Speaker 2: like my body everything to her, even like the men

551
00:22:16,281 --> 00:22:17,761
Speaker 2: that she would date, do you know what I mean,

552
00:22:17,801 --> 00:22:20,521
Speaker 2: Like it was really like this, I built that level

553
00:22:20,521 --> 00:22:23,120
Speaker 2: of resentment towards her in some way I didn't mean to,

554
00:22:23,241 --> 00:22:26,120
Speaker 2: and I also didn't know that at the time, so

555
00:22:26,681 --> 00:22:28,360
Speaker 2: that's just how I felt. But I just was so

556
00:22:28,481 --> 00:22:31,481
Speaker 2: inspired by her that it also became a competition because

557
00:22:31,481 --> 00:22:33,961
Speaker 2: I didn't see inspiration as a positive thing. I saw

558
00:22:34,001 --> 00:22:37,001
Speaker 2: it as almost like a negative thing, because when you

559
00:22:37,041 --> 00:22:39,840
Speaker 2: have so many siblings, you're in competition for your parents' love,

560
00:22:40,360 --> 00:22:41,801
Speaker 2: You're in competition for their.

561
00:22:41,640 --> 00:22:42,761
Speaker 1: Time, their presence.

562
00:22:42,921 --> 00:22:45,561
Speaker 2: You're you know, whoever's the loudest in the room or

563
00:22:45,561 --> 00:22:47,561
Speaker 2: the one who needs the most is also the person

564
00:22:47,600 --> 00:22:51,241
Speaker 2: who gets the most, So true, you know, it's stage. Yeah,

565
00:22:51,360 --> 00:22:53,600
Speaker 2: I feel for you, budding nam, do you know what

566
00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:55,440
Speaker 2: I mean. There's so many people needing so much of

567
00:22:55,441 --> 00:22:57,921
Speaker 2: my parents, So yeah, you just kind of like can

568
00:22:58,001 --> 00:23:00,120
Speaker 2: fall back, and so if you're not being the loudest

569
00:23:00,120 --> 00:23:02,041
Speaker 2: in the room, you're not getting as much attention, you know.

570
00:23:02,561 --> 00:23:03,440
Speaker 2: And that sort of thing.

571
00:23:03,561 --> 00:23:06,640
Speaker 1: Happens in childcare and daycare. Because my current nanny and

572
00:23:06,681 --> 00:23:08,801
Speaker 1: my past nanny both came from a childcare experience, and

573
00:23:08,801 --> 00:23:11,041
Speaker 1: they always said, like, the naughtiest kids tend to get

574
00:23:11,201 --> 00:23:14,680
Speaker 1: more attention because they stole the attention from being so loud. Yeah,

575
00:23:14,721 --> 00:23:18,201
Speaker 1: and that's why I regret putting Taj in daycare, because

576
00:23:18,201 --> 00:23:21,441
Speaker 1: he's very shy, introverted, and I felt like he got

577
00:23:21,561 --> 00:23:24,480
Speaker 1: left behind. Interesting I think the quiet kids do. And

578
00:23:24,521 --> 00:23:26,241
Speaker 1: this could be totally wrong. I'm sure there's some daycare

579
00:23:26,281 --> 00:23:27,761
Speaker 1: teachers that are like, oh my gosh, no, we make

580
00:23:27,801 --> 00:23:29,601
Speaker 1: sure everyone's included. And I'm sure everyone does the best

581
00:23:29,640 --> 00:23:31,520
Speaker 1: they can. But hats off to you, guys, because you're

582
00:23:31,521 --> 00:23:33,400
Speaker 1: looking up to twenty fucking children at once.

583
00:23:33,561 --> 00:23:33,801
Speaker 2: Yeah.

584
00:23:33,840 --> 00:23:34,721
Speaker 1: I've struggled with two.

585
00:23:34,880 --> 00:23:35,120
Speaker 2: Yeah.

586
00:23:35,321 --> 00:23:37,080
Speaker 1: In both of them, the attentions are long, that they

587
00:23:37,120 --> 00:23:40,041
Speaker 1: desire at every given moment beyond so much like that,

588
00:23:40,120 --> 00:23:42,281
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, you just always want to be able

589
00:23:42,321 --> 00:23:44,241
Speaker 1: to give them more. But like Tyler, for example, you've

590
00:23:44,281 --> 00:23:46,521
Speaker 1: seen it. She is not afraid to take up space.

591
00:23:46,640 --> 00:23:49,561
Speaker 1: She is my fucking world. Everyone look at me like

592
00:23:49,681 --> 00:23:53,441
Speaker 1: at any given moment, she is either nude, bum dancing,

593
00:23:53,561 --> 00:23:55,561
Speaker 1: poking her tongue out, like doing everything she can to

594
00:23:55,600 --> 00:23:58,041
Speaker 1: get our attention, and we are laughing our heads off

595
00:23:58,120 --> 00:24:00,881
Speaker 1: like she gets all the attention she desires. Yeah, where

596
00:24:00,921 --> 00:24:03,440
Speaker 1: his taj just like he wants more attention but doesn't

597
00:24:03,521 --> 00:24:05,441
Speaker 1: go about it like that, So then feel like he

598
00:24:05,481 --> 00:24:08,880
Speaker 1: doesn't get us much. Yeah. How about their build of bears? Oh,

599
00:24:10,441 --> 00:24:13,240
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, my nanny took them to do that

600
00:24:13,321 --> 00:24:15,200
Speaker 1: build a bear thing, and she said to you a photo.

601
00:24:15,441 --> 00:24:18,120
Speaker 1: It was so their personality. He's sitting there with like

602
00:24:18,120 --> 00:24:20,001
Speaker 1: a sweet little smile, like no teeth, looking at the

603
00:24:20,001 --> 00:24:22,841
Speaker 1: camera holding his brown bear with reb dums on. That's it.

604
00:24:23,321 --> 00:24:27,521
Speaker 1: She biggest smile on a face. She's got this massive

605
00:24:27,561 --> 00:24:31,561
Speaker 1: flower crown fucking headband on. She's in the brightest mismatch outfit.

606
00:24:31,600 --> 00:24:34,001
Speaker 1: She's got bright blue high heels on like you know

607
00:24:34,041 --> 00:24:37,921
Speaker 1: the click clock yes runs, and her bear is completely

608
00:24:38,001 --> 00:24:42,761
Speaker 1: rainbow like I'm talking rainbow, bright silver high heels, glittery

609
00:24:43,041 --> 00:24:47,880
Speaker 1: sequent rainbow fucking dress. It was the most out there right, like,

610
00:24:48,080 --> 00:24:50,880
Speaker 1: look at me, fucking oh my god, wasn't it. We

611
00:24:50,880 --> 00:24:52,600
Speaker 1: were both just like wow, is that not their two

612
00:24:52,681 --> 00:24:54,401
Speaker 1: personalities summed up and fucking build a bear.

613
00:24:54,481 --> 00:24:56,801
Speaker 2: But it's so funny because you see them side by side,

614
00:24:56,921 --> 00:24:59,681
Speaker 2: like tajan Tala and then the bears in front. Yeah,

615
00:24:59,761 --> 00:25:02,400
Speaker 2: just like wow, you guys later because they don't look

616
00:25:02,441 --> 00:25:05,001
Speaker 2: at it. It's just so funny, like their personalities. Yeah,

617
00:25:05,201 --> 00:25:07,041
Speaker 2: like came through in the Bears and we were just

618
00:25:07,080 --> 00:25:09,201
Speaker 2: like standing there like wow, can you believe this? It's

619
00:25:09,241 --> 00:25:11,521
Speaker 2: so true? And you know it's interesting. Like even my

620
00:25:11,600 --> 00:25:14,600
Speaker 2: older sister Danny, So she's the second child and.

621
00:25:14,561 --> 00:25:19,001
Speaker 1: She is the oldest. Tasia's the oldest. Chantell me, yeah,

622
00:25:19,041 --> 00:25:19,600
Speaker 1: I get cool.

623
00:25:19,721 --> 00:25:22,720
Speaker 2: So my sister Danny, she's very She's always been kind

624
00:25:22,721 --> 00:25:26,080
Speaker 2: of the easy child. She's the easy, quiet, easy going,

625
00:25:26,160 --> 00:25:27,481
Speaker 2: doesn't really speak up all that much.

626
00:25:27,681 --> 00:25:29,281
Speaker 1: She was very soft, very soft.

627
00:25:29,400 --> 00:25:31,080
Speaker 2: But because she was soft, she also kind of got

628
00:25:31,080 --> 00:25:31,721
Speaker 2: pushed to the side.

629
00:25:31,761 --> 00:25:32,481
Speaker 1: Not push to the side.

630
00:25:32,600 --> 00:25:36,121
Speaker 2: I mean, like Tasha and Chantal were both loud personalities.

631
00:25:36,201 --> 00:25:39,160
Speaker 2: Chantal especially, she was the loudest. So she was always

632
00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:41,480
Speaker 2: the biggest energy, always doing things, always moving, and then

633
00:25:41,521 --> 00:25:43,120
Speaker 2: it was just like you know, everyone else kind.

634
00:25:43,041 --> 00:25:43,840
Speaker 1: Of fit around that.

635
00:25:44,041 --> 00:25:46,481
Speaker 2: Yeah, so it's just depending on who's kind of taking

636
00:25:46,521 --> 00:25:49,801
Speaker 2: up most attention anyway to sum that up, like it

637
00:25:49,840 --> 00:25:53,201
Speaker 2: does feel like a competition when you're in that energy,

638
00:25:53,281 --> 00:25:55,200
Speaker 2: especially when it comes to girls. Because I had to

639
00:25:55,241 --> 00:25:58,201
Speaker 2: unlearn this behavior when it came to female friendships, yes,

640
00:25:58,321 --> 00:26:00,521
Speaker 2: because this actually played out for me in female friendships

641
00:26:00,521 --> 00:26:02,521
Speaker 2: where I felt like I had that same energy with

642
00:26:02,561 --> 00:26:05,041
Speaker 2: my sisters of competition. I need to be more beauty.

643
00:26:05,281 --> 00:26:06,480
Speaker 2: I need to be more pretty. I need to do

644
00:26:06,521 --> 00:26:08,400
Speaker 2: my hair like them. I need to buy the clothes

645
00:26:08,441 --> 00:26:10,401
Speaker 2: that they wear. I need to show up like them.

646
00:26:10,441 --> 00:26:12,160
Speaker 2: Because I loved the way that they showed up. I

647
00:26:12,160 --> 00:26:14,001
Speaker 2: wanted to become that, but I didn't do it in

648
00:26:14,001 --> 00:26:14,600
Speaker 2: a productive way.

649
00:26:14,721 --> 00:26:17,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's so interesting. Hey, yeah, I remember. Over the years,

650
00:26:17,201 --> 00:26:19,680
Speaker 1: it's kind of off topic, but kind of similar. People

651
00:26:19,681 --> 00:26:21,961
Speaker 1: would say things to me like, oh, I feel like

652
00:26:22,001 --> 00:26:23,640
Speaker 1: you get all the credit for the business, Like what

653
00:26:23,721 --> 00:26:26,480
Speaker 1: about Steve? And I remember going to him being like, oh, like,

654
00:26:26,521 --> 00:26:28,001
Speaker 1: I want you on camera more because I don't like

655
00:26:28,080 --> 00:26:29,961
Speaker 1: taking all the credit for all everything that we've built,

656
00:26:29,961 --> 00:26:31,761
Speaker 1: because I couldn't do anything without you.

657
00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:34,601
Speaker 2: Like you say that often. I literally say, Steven, give

658
00:26:34,640 --> 00:26:35,561
Speaker 2: credit with credits.

659
00:26:35,321 --> 00:26:37,121
Speaker 1: But I feel like I've had to consciously do that more.

660
00:26:37,120 --> 00:26:39,201
Speaker 1: But he is behind the camera, going I don't want

661
00:26:39,201 --> 00:26:42,561
Speaker 1: the credit, get the camera off me. Yeah the stuff. Yeah,

662
00:26:42,561 --> 00:26:45,120
Speaker 1: I'm behind scenes, so is his knee. He doesn't do

663
00:26:45,160 --> 00:26:47,360
Speaker 1: it for significance, not that that's the reason I do it,

664
00:26:47,360 --> 00:26:49,041
Speaker 1: But I love the camera. I love tension. I love

665
00:26:49,481 --> 00:26:51,640
Speaker 1: being big and out there. But I remember going to

666
00:26:51,721 --> 00:26:53,961
Speaker 1: him thinking, shit, I feel bad that I haven't bought

667
00:26:54,001 --> 00:26:56,241
Speaker 1: him forward more. And he's like, no, I've intentionally done that.

668
00:26:56,360 --> 00:26:58,401
Speaker 1: It's like, yeah, I don't want the camera on me. Interesting.

669
00:26:58,561 --> 00:27:00,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, but it is. It's more like it's kind

670
00:27:00,761 --> 00:27:02,880
Speaker 2: of like Tajan Tala. It's like morally your personality to

671
00:27:02,880 --> 00:27:05,120
Speaker 2: do something like yes, it's more like Steve's personal I

672
00:27:05,160 --> 00:27:06,120
Speaker 2: need to be behind the camera.

673
00:27:06,160 --> 00:27:07,880
Speaker 1: But you can imagine if there was a couple and

674
00:27:07,921 --> 00:27:10,400
Speaker 1: they were both online, I wonder if that would affect

675
00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:12,921
Speaker 1: an intimate relationship. Who's gone more followers or like who's

676
00:27:12,921 --> 00:27:14,921
Speaker 1: getting more like I wonder, I don't know, I don't

677
00:27:14,961 --> 00:27:17,361
Speaker 1: know any interesting it's the famous couples, I don't.

678
00:27:17,201 --> 00:27:19,640
Speaker 2: Know, or would it be. Oh, but we can collaborate

679
00:27:19,721 --> 00:27:20,360
Speaker 2: us like it's.

680
00:27:20,241 --> 00:27:22,521
Speaker 1: Just like let's help each other. Yeah. And I've always

681
00:27:22,561 --> 00:27:25,720
Speaker 1: been that with my friends. I've introduced my friendships for

682
00:27:25,721 --> 00:27:28,361
Speaker 1: the last fifteen years online and I'm always tagging them

683
00:27:28,360 --> 00:27:30,281
Speaker 1: and growing their following and helping build them up and

684
00:27:30,281 --> 00:27:32,880
Speaker 1: helping them business like I naturally beyond for the people

685
00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:34,801
Speaker 1: that you love, and actually that's what I want to do. Yeah,

686
00:27:34,801 --> 00:27:37,241
Speaker 1: so I suppose the relationship would be similar. I would

687
00:27:37,281 --> 00:27:38,880
Speaker 1: imagine that, Yeah, I wouldn't turn to competition.

688
00:27:39,041 --> 00:27:39,241
Speaker 2: No.

689
00:27:39,600 --> 00:27:41,521
Speaker 1: Also, I feel like sometimes when I talk about this

690
00:27:41,600 --> 00:27:43,121
Speaker 1: kind of stuff, people like, oh, but you do care

691
00:27:43,120 --> 00:27:46,120
Speaker 1: what you look like. You've had plastic surgery, new ar makeup,

692
00:27:46,160 --> 00:27:48,360
Speaker 1: like you obviously do want to look beautiful, Like, yeah,

693
00:27:48,360 --> 00:27:50,081
Speaker 1: I do, but I don't do it because what other

694
00:27:50,120 --> 00:27:52,160
Speaker 1: people have said. Yeah, I do it because I want to.

695
00:27:52,201 --> 00:27:54,241
Speaker 1: It's like me getting my upper left surgery. If you've

696
00:27:54,241 --> 00:27:57,600
Speaker 1: missed last year, I'm getting surgery this year very soon. Actually,

697
00:27:58,120 --> 00:28:00,080
Speaker 1: I've got quite hooded eyes and been wanting it four

698
00:28:00,160 --> 00:28:02,680
Speaker 1: years and I'm super excited. But I don't do that

699
00:28:02,721 --> 00:28:05,361
Speaker 1: because fucking Sally Smith online has told me that I've

700
00:28:05,360 --> 00:28:07,440
Speaker 1: got saggy eyes. You know what, Actually everyone tells me

701
00:28:07,481 --> 00:28:09,121
Speaker 1: I need my ears pinned back. That's what I get

702
00:28:09,120 --> 00:28:10,840
Speaker 1: most tears for online. I'm like, I don't actually think

703
00:28:10,840 --> 00:28:12,080
Speaker 1: I need that. I'm to get that.

704
00:28:12,241 --> 00:28:14,041
Speaker 2: I literally remember you're coming to with being like, hey,

705
00:28:14,120 --> 00:28:15,561
Speaker 2: this is not even an insecurity of mine.

706
00:28:15,561 --> 00:28:17,721
Speaker 1: What are they talking about my ears. Should I be insecure?

707
00:28:17,921 --> 00:28:20,281
Speaker 1: You tell me I went to s even like, Babe,

708
00:28:20,281 --> 00:28:22,080
Speaker 1: my ears big. He's like, you know your ears and

709
00:28:22,120 --> 00:28:24,600
Speaker 1: nose never stop growing. I'm like, fuck, oh, like now

710
00:28:24,761 --> 00:28:26,160
Speaker 1: now I will. But you know what I mean. If

711
00:28:26,201 --> 00:28:28,080
Speaker 1: I was listening to what the noise told me I

712
00:28:28,120 --> 00:28:29,721
Speaker 1: need to get done, it would be to get my

713
00:28:29,801 --> 00:28:31,480
Speaker 1: ears done. But I don't feel it'scool about that. If

714
00:28:31,521 --> 00:28:34,361
Speaker 1: I get anything, change, get my lips on or botox,

715
00:28:34,400 --> 00:28:36,120
Speaker 1: because I want to get it done. Yeah, and I

716
00:28:36,120 --> 00:28:37,640
Speaker 1: feel good with that. And what I do with my

717
00:28:37,721 --> 00:28:41,161
Speaker 1: body and my looks has nothing to do with anyone else. Yeah,

718
00:28:41,201 --> 00:28:42,401
Speaker 1: and I think everyone should do that.

719
00:28:42,441 --> 00:28:44,881
Speaker 2: And also having this conversation and being honest about these

720
00:28:44,881 --> 00:28:47,201
Speaker 2: things doesn't mean that you don't want to look good

721
00:28:47,361 --> 00:28:49,001
Speaker 2: or you don't want to feel good, or that you

722
00:28:49,041 --> 00:28:52,440
Speaker 2: don't condone doing surgeries or getting plastic surgery. If it

723
00:28:52,441 --> 00:28:54,081
Speaker 2: feels good for you makes you feel good about yourself,

724
00:28:54,081 --> 00:28:54,641
Speaker 2: it doesn't mean that.

725
00:28:54,681 --> 00:28:55,801
Speaker 1: Do you know what I mean? Like two things can

726
00:28:55,801 --> 00:28:58,001
Speaker 1: co exist at once. Yes, I think it's just when

727
00:28:58,041 --> 00:29:00,641
Speaker 1: I posted about getting the upper left, someone actually commented

728
00:29:00,681 --> 00:29:03,281
Speaker 1: something really Oh, I'm gonna butcher what she said, but

729
00:29:03,321 --> 00:29:06,561
Speaker 1: she goes I don't believe you're doing this to change

730
00:29:06,601 --> 00:29:08,440
Speaker 1: what you look like, which isn't entirely true, because I

731
00:29:08,441 --> 00:29:10,161
Speaker 1: do want to change my eyes, which is like I

732
00:29:10,201 --> 00:29:12,841
Speaker 1: think you more doing it so that you remain looking

733
00:29:12,921 --> 00:29:15,601
Speaker 1: like how you look now because you love yourself. Oh,

734
00:29:15,721 --> 00:29:17,281
Speaker 1: because if I think about, if I don't get the

735
00:29:17,321 --> 00:29:20,121
Speaker 1: surgery done, I'm going to look so tired in five years.

736
00:29:20,121 --> 00:29:21,961
Speaker 1: And like sometimes it's even hard to if I'm really

737
00:29:21,961 --> 00:29:23,961
Speaker 1: tired or I cry lots. It's actually quite hard to

738
00:29:23,961 --> 00:29:25,241
Speaker 1: see out in my left eye, like I feel like

739
00:29:25,241 --> 00:29:28,641
Speaker 1: I have to. Actually, you guys can't stuck watching. I

740
00:29:28,721 --> 00:29:33,281
Speaker 1: like try to open my eyes open to it's quite hard.

741
00:29:33,841 --> 00:29:36,720
Speaker 1: But she's right, I would like to remain looking how

742
00:29:36,761 --> 00:29:41,001
Speaker 1: I am now rather than looking forty. Yeah, yeah, why

743
00:29:41,001 --> 00:29:43,960
Speaker 1: would I not? As if we don't want to preserve Yes,

744
00:29:44,121 --> 00:29:47,761
Speaker 1: hallo peptides. Speaking of we need to a whole week

745
00:29:47,801 --> 00:29:49,881
Speaker 1: help update. We can do a health update. Yeah, are

746
00:29:49,881 --> 00:29:51,601
Speaker 1: you guys interesting to hear about our peptide journey?

747
00:29:51,681 --> 00:29:53,881
Speaker 2: Let us know we just started peptides guy, we did

748
00:29:54,281 --> 00:29:55,001
Speaker 2: super exciting.

749
00:29:55,041 --> 00:29:57,881
Speaker 1: Also, there's been some some things. The action been a

750
00:29:57,881 --> 00:29:59,681
Speaker 1: bit of a journey. We won't tell you about it. No,

751
00:29:59,761 --> 00:30:01,161
Speaker 1: if you want an episode on that, let us know.

752
00:30:01,401 --> 00:30:03,241
Speaker 1: We should do like a whole health update. I think

753
00:30:03,241 --> 00:30:05,681
Speaker 1: that'd be great, that'd be cool. All Right, I'm rambling

754
00:30:06,361 --> 00:30:10,281
Speaker 1: in thirty minutes. You'll never get back, just kidding.

755
00:30:10,281 --> 00:30:17,241
Speaker 2: You love it, tag us. This is one of those

756
00:30:17,281 --> 00:30:18,401
Speaker 2: moments where we're loving ourselves.

757
00:30:18,401 --> 00:30:19,721
Speaker 1: See, we are loving ourselves.

758
00:30:19,721 --> 00:30:22,161
Speaker 2: But this is the duality, Like give yourself permission to

759
00:30:22,161 --> 00:30:23,960
Speaker 2: have duality. You can have things that you're like, oh,

760
00:30:24,001 --> 00:30:25,561
Speaker 2: I don't feel confident in this, or I feel a

761
00:30:25,561 --> 00:30:27,681
Speaker 2: bit insecure about this, but then in other areas you

762
00:30:27,681 --> 00:30:28,681
Speaker 2: feel super confident.

763
00:30:28,721 --> 00:30:29,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know what I mean.

764
00:30:29,401 --> 00:30:31,281
Speaker 2: Like, this is the conversation I've been having lots lately.

765
00:30:31,401 --> 00:30:34,041
Speaker 2: I can yap under water and so can Ashy and

766
00:30:34,081 --> 00:30:36,601
Speaker 2: like this is why this dynamic works so much, because

767
00:30:36,601 --> 00:30:38,641
Speaker 2: we can and because we love it. Yeah, and that's

768
00:30:38,641 --> 00:30:40,961
Speaker 2: something we feel strong in and all of it gets

769
00:30:41,001 --> 00:30:41,520
Speaker 2: to exist.

770
00:30:41,881 --> 00:30:44,081
Speaker 1: Yes, So back to the question, do we fight, Yes,

771
00:30:44,121 --> 00:30:46,761
Speaker 1: that's our main argument. Oh yeah, but it is actually quiet.

772
00:30:47,321 --> 00:30:50,561
Speaker 1: It just gets a little just a little irritated, you

773
00:30:50,641 --> 00:30:53,161
Speaker 1: know ya. Do we argue? No, we don't argue.

774
00:30:53,161 --> 00:30:56,241
Speaker 2: And also we're very respectful in accmuication, like we have

775
00:30:56,321 --> 00:30:58,601
Speaker 2: like moments where we get like little triggers and stuff

776
00:30:58,641 --> 00:31:00,440
Speaker 2: like that, but there hasn't ever been anything that's been

777
00:31:00,441 --> 00:31:03,000
Speaker 2: a blow up or rude or disrespect to each other

778
00:31:03,041 --> 00:31:04,601
Speaker 2: and stuff like that. I think our foundation is so

779
00:31:04,641 --> 00:31:06,720
Speaker 2: strong as well now that even when we have triggers,

780
00:31:06,761 --> 00:31:09,281
Speaker 2: we're like, okay, like we need to take a breath,

781
00:31:09,281 --> 00:31:10,480
Speaker 2: calm down. Do We've got to do it and then

782
00:31:10,481 --> 00:31:13,440
Speaker 2: come back to each other. Yeah, really focus on repair,

783
00:31:13,561 --> 00:31:15,121
Speaker 2: like we are very big on, very.

784
00:31:15,001 --> 00:31:17,321
Speaker 1: Big in repair, and Tianna is also very good at

785
00:31:17,401 --> 00:31:19,480
Speaker 1: leading in communication. I feel like I've really improved my

786
00:31:19,521 --> 00:31:22,440
Speaker 1: communication and still working on it on how to have

787
00:31:22,481 --> 00:31:26,881
Speaker 1: really kind, effective conversations because we don't grow up learning

788
00:31:26,881 --> 00:31:29,281
Speaker 1: this unfortunately, Like I don't know what your household was,

789
00:31:29,281 --> 00:31:32,641
Speaker 1: Like mine was yelling, telling shit, abuse, It wasn't a

790
00:31:32,681 --> 00:31:34,521
Speaker 1: good example of So now as an adult, that's something

791
00:31:34,561 --> 00:31:36,441
Speaker 1: I have to learn. So you've been really great and

792
00:31:36,481 --> 00:31:39,881
Speaker 1: like not only teaching me, but actually showing me, which

793
00:31:39,921 --> 00:31:41,641
Speaker 1: is really cool. As parents, that's what we want to

794
00:31:41,641 --> 00:31:43,001
Speaker 1: do too, is like show them how to do it,

795
00:31:43,081 --> 00:31:45,440
Speaker 1: not just tell them to be respectful. I actually do it,

796
00:31:45,601 --> 00:31:49,041
Speaker 1: actually be respectful to them, which is really cool. We'll

797
00:31:49,041 --> 00:31:51,681
Speaker 1: see you guys. Next next time, next week, days time,

798
00:31:51,961 --> 00:31:55,200
Speaker 1: next week. I don't know what days. It's Wednesday, by Wednesday, Bie,