1 00:00:00,680 --> 00:00:04,000 Speaker 1: With fifteen books to her name. On the topic of parenting, 2 00:00:04,240 --> 00:00:07,040 Speaker 1: I'd say our next guest, there's somewhat of an expert. 3 00:00:07,200 --> 00:00:09,080 Speaker 2: You never know who you're going to get with your child. 4 00:00:09,320 --> 00:00:11,520 Speaker 2: It's like a puzzle. We can't see the picture. But 5 00:00:11,560 --> 00:00:13,880 Speaker 2: I wanted you just be reassured that all every child 6 00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:17,400 Speaker 2: actually wants is to be loved, accepted and valid as 7 00:00:17,400 --> 00:00:17,720 Speaker 2: they are. 8 00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:20,720 Speaker 1: God, che's good, Please, welcome to the show. 9 00:00:20,880 --> 00:00:24,320 Speaker 3: Maggie Dance Maggie, Dan's good morning. 10 00:00:25,160 --> 00:00:26,560 Speaker 4: Hi guy, how are you? 11 00:00:26,800 --> 00:00:27,640 Speaker 1: Where do you want to start? 12 00:00:27,720 --> 00:00:30,240 Speaker 5: Jason, Maggie, Why did I have three children and put 13 00:00:30,240 --> 00:00:31,200 Speaker 5: myself in this situation? 14 00:00:31,440 --> 00:00:34,000 Speaker 4: No, no, look, no worries. Look I think you know 15 00:00:34,120 --> 00:00:36,240 Speaker 4: when there were days I locked myself on the toilet, 16 00:00:36,280 --> 00:00:39,400 Speaker 4: So what was I thinking? Like, what the heck? Did 17 00:00:39,400 --> 00:00:41,040 Speaker 4: I know what's going to be this hard? And then 18 00:00:41,080 --> 00:00:45,839 Speaker 4: I just said four paral voice like yeah, so that's normal, right, 19 00:00:46,120 --> 00:00:52,400 Speaker 4: because raising little humans who are unpredictable and developmentally unable 20 00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:54,959 Speaker 4: to be the compliant, beautiful, well behaved children we thought 21 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:56,720 Speaker 4: the world was. You know, if you said my kids 22 00:00:56,760 --> 00:00:57,560 Speaker 4: are never going to do. 23 00:00:59,160 --> 00:01:03,840 Speaker 3: Yeah, right, Like, so I've got a eleven, nine and 24 00:01:04,080 --> 00:01:07,840 Speaker 3: three year old and friends of mine have got teenage 25 00:01:07,920 --> 00:01:10,800 Speaker 3: daughters and they're like, we're in the tough years now 26 00:01:10,840 --> 00:01:13,640 Speaker 3: for daughters. Yeah, well, I think boys by the time 27 00:01:13,680 --> 00:01:16,280 Speaker 3: boys hit fifteen sixteen, we're just happy to ride our 28 00:01:16,280 --> 00:01:17,000 Speaker 3: bikes at the server. 29 00:01:17,880 --> 00:01:20,280 Speaker 4: That's if we can get them up the screen nowadays though, 30 00:01:20,360 --> 00:01:22,400 Speaker 4: so and that's the other challenge we have. The world 31 00:01:22,440 --> 00:01:24,319 Speaker 4: has kind of I think I put a thing up 32 00:01:24,319 --> 00:01:26,280 Speaker 4: the other day on my Facebook page about how we've 33 00:01:26,319 --> 00:01:29,560 Speaker 4: stolen boyhood off boys here we have because we've made 34 00:01:29,600 --> 00:01:33,600 Speaker 4: them have to be safer and actual fact, natural consequences 35 00:01:33,640 --> 00:01:35,960 Speaker 4: of boys falling out of trees and falling off their 36 00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:38,520 Speaker 4: bikes and you know, all of that is how they 37 00:01:38,600 --> 00:01:41,240 Speaker 4: learned not to make that choice next time, and now 38 00:01:41,280 --> 00:01:44,080 Speaker 4: we aren't letting them do it. For their capacity to 39 00:01:44,120 --> 00:01:46,520 Speaker 4: take risks, and that was really one of the things 40 00:01:46,520 --> 00:01:50,720 Speaker 4: on I think episode three isn't as developed and they're 41 00:01:50,760 --> 00:01:54,040 Speaker 4: not as resilient. You know, we've still got biological wiring 42 00:01:54,080 --> 00:01:56,360 Speaker 4: and the testosterone means they're still supposed to be out 43 00:01:56,440 --> 00:01:57,160 Speaker 4: hunting mammoth. 44 00:01:57,400 --> 00:01:57,640 Speaker 5: Yeah. 45 00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:00,840 Speaker 3: I was explaining to one of my boys who's nine 46 00:02:00,880 --> 00:02:02,960 Speaker 3: the other day. I'm like, mate, I used to go 47 00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:05,720 Speaker 3: off on my pushbike for six hours. Don Mum and Dad, 48 00:02:05,720 --> 00:02:07,880 Speaker 3: that's me no idea, ray Am, I'd come back because 49 00:02:07,880 --> 00:02:09,919 Speaker 3: I was hungry, I'd et and I'd be gone again. 50 00:02:10,200 --> 00:02:13,320 Speaker 3: And I'm just watching his little mind blind like really like. 51 00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:16,000 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, And they're probably looking at you, going how 52 00:02:16,120 --> 00:02:16,840 Speaker 4: dangerous was that? 53 00:02:16,919 --> 00:02:20,120 Speaker 5: D Yes, Yes, I'm like, I'm encouraging you to do it. 54 00:02:20,160 --> 00:02:20,840 Speaker 5: Get out of here. 55 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:24,000 Speaker 4: So it's called safetyism, and it's one of the things 56 00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:25,720 Speaker 4: that we keep on challenging. And that's one of the 57 00:02:25,800 --> 00:02:29,240 Speaker 4: things I love in this episode to you know, remind 58 00:02:29,320 --> 00:02:31,960 Speaker 4: everybody that they're meant to be doing risky stuff as 59 00:02:31,960 --> 00:02:34,960 Speaker 4: they navigate through childhood so that they're able to navigate 60 00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:38,520 Speaker 4: fire later, they're able to hear they're in a warning 61 00:02:38,600 --> 00:02:41,200 Speaker 4: system that says, no, mate, last time you jumped off 62 00:02:41,200 --> 00:02:44,080 Speaker 4: that balcony, hurt yourself. See not doing it today. And 63 00:02:44,160 --> 00:02:46,399 Speaker 4: I think, you know, this is one of the challenges. 64 00:02:46,560 --> 00:02:50,000 Speaker 4: We want to overprotect them because that's our job, because 65 00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:52,040 Speaker 4: you look like the lousy parent when your kids right 66 00:02:52,120 --> 00:02:53,560 Speaker 4: up the top of that tree and you're not following 67 00:02:53,600 --> 00:02:54,520 Speaker 4: them down right. 68 00:02:54,600 --> 00:02:54,799 Speaker 5: Yeah. 69 00:02:54,840 --> 00:02:58,239 Speaker 4: Nowadays, man, man, the judgment. 70 00:02:58,360 --> 00:03:02,720 Speaker 1: Now the role of a life time parenting is and 71 00:03:02,800 --> 00:03:06,480 Speaker 1: I hope that I become a dad one day, right, Jay, soon, 72 00:03:06,600 --> 00:03:09,760 Speaker 1: I've got I've got a question for you. I mean, clearly, 73 00:03:09,840 --> 00:03:11,920 Speaker 1: it is the role in the honor of a lifetime, 74 00:03:12,280 --> 00:03:13,840 Speaker 1: right yep. But it's hard. 75 00:03:14,160 --> 00:03:17,600 Speaker 5: Yeah, it's exhausting. Yeah, it is exhausting. 76 00:03:17,680 --> 00:03:20,560 Speaker 3: But then there'll be moments like yesterday, you know, we're 77 00:03:20,560 --> 00:03:21,960 Speaker 3: not we do a bit of prep for this show 78 00:03:21,960 --> 00:03:25,400 Speaker 3: in the afternoon. Hard to believe, Meggie, I know, but 79 00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:27,600 Speaker 3: I was like, you know what, I'll do all my 80 00:03:27,639 --> 00:03:29,440 Speaker 3: work late tonight. I just want to sit down and play, 81 00:03:29,480 --> 00:03:31,680 Speaker 3: you know, with my eight year old, you know. And 82 00:03:31,720 --> 00:03:34,160 Speaker 3: when you get those moments, it's my wife and I 83 00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:36,720 Speaker 3: look at each other and go, go it's a bloody rollercoaster. Yeah, 84 00:03:37,040 --> 00:03:39,160 Speaker 3: you know what I mean, Like one minute, I'm just 85 00:03:39,200 --> 00:03:41,560 Speaker 3: going how do I get myself in this situation? And 86 00:03:41,600 --> 00:03:43,440 Speaker 3: the other minute, I'm happy to pause on the world 87 00:03:43,560 --> 00:03:44,440 Speaker 3: and just build lego. 88 00:03:44,720 --> 00:03:48,000 Speaker 4: That's exactly what it is. And it's always been like that. 89 00:03:48,160 --> 00:03:49,920 Speaker 4: And so what we keep I keep saying to parents, 90 00:03:49,920 --> 00:03:52,280 Speaker 4: what are you're doing now? Your leans is on what 91 00:03:52,320 --> 00:03:55,520 Speaker 4: I'm doing wrong. It's not what you're doing right. And 92 00:03:55,560 --> 00:03:57,720 Speaker 4: it's you know, in the midst of COVID. I kept 93 00:03:57,720 --> 00:03:59,800 Speaker 4: sending parents, you can't work full time with the kids 94 00:03:59,800 --> 00:04:02,640 Speaker 4: doing schooling. Put a good movie on, get the popcorn out, 95 00:04:02,640 --> 00:04:05,040 Speaker 4: cuddle up on the couch, and those kids to remember 96 00:04:05,680 --> 00:04:07,960 Speaker 4: COVID might have been crap, but we actually hung out 97 00:04:08,040 --> 00:04:13,400 Speaker 4: and did stuff together. They're hungry for connection with parents, 98 00:04:13,680 --> 00:04:15,880 Speaker 4: and you know, when it's all it is is correcting 99 00:04:15,880 --> 00:04:17,960 Speaker 4: me and telling me. And that's why the adolescent years 100 00:04:17,960 --> 00:04:21,080 Speaker 4: are so tricky, because so much of the stuff is 101 00:04:21,080 --> 00:04:23,240 Speaker 4: happening that they don't know, which causes them to be 102 00:04:23,279 --> 00:04:27,200 Speaker 4: confused and angry and stressed and mixed up. And then 103 00:04:27,240 --> 00:04:29,200 Speaker 4: we're going to come down hard because they're not done 104 00:04:29,320 --> 00:04:33,479 Speaker 4: something when we never know that there is a psychological 105 00:04:33,520 --> 00:04:38,360 Speaker 4: fragility inside them and they're desperate, just desperate for someone 106 00:04:38,400 --> 00:04:40,680 Speaker 4: to say it's okay. It happens to wall of it. 107 00:04:41,320 --> 00:04:44,760 Speaker 1: So, Maggie, we talk so often about parents and hating 108 00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:47,839 Speaker 1: a break from their children. Do children need a break 109 00:04:47,880 --> 00:04:49,360 Speaker 1: from their parents? Sometimes? 110 00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:53,120 Speaker 4: You know, there's a whole generation here that are in 111 00:04:53,160 --> 00:04:56,279 Speaker 4: their bedroom more than any other previous generation, and they're 112 00:04:56,320 --> 00:04:58,960 Speaker 4: getting away from their parents in a way right because 113 00:04:58,960 --> 00:05:02,960 Speaker 4: they're meant to individual way into a new human coming 114 00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:05,640 Speaker 4: over the bridge to adulthood. But now what they're doing, 115 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:07,360 Speaker 4: they're doing it in the bedroom, but they're not in 116 00:05:07,360 --> 00:05:10,880 Speaker 4: a social situation, not in a real situation, so they're 117 00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:13,960 Speaker 4: ending up with lower social and emotional capacity. 118 00:05:14,200 --> 00:05:16,479 Speaker 1: It's escapism as opposed to independence. 119 00:05:16,960 --> 00:05:19,440 Speaker 4: In their view, they think they're more connected, but what 120 00:05:19,560 --> 00:05:21,880 Speaker 4: we now know, and this comes up in today's episode, 121 00:05:21,920 --> 00:05:26,120 Speaker 4: they're actually lonelier and more socially connected, and yet they 122 00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:28,520 Speaker 4: want to spend hours doing it because it's at a distance. 123 00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:31,680 Speaker 4: But it's all it's not all good, and it's not 124 00:05:31,760 --> 00:05:34,760 Speaker 4: all bad. But when it's bad, it's really bad. And 125 00:05:34,839 --> 00:05:37,840 Speaker 4: I think if you watch, you'll get the smack in 126 00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:39,920 Speaker 4: the face of what AI is doing in our team 127 00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:44,159 Speaker 4: space and the capacity to do really harmful things even 128 00:05:44,240 --> 00:05:47,400 Speaker 4: though it might seem like a bit of fun for 129 00:05:47,520 --> 00:05:51,440 Speaker 4: an immature boy. Can you see once again through their lens. 130 00:05:51,920 --> 00:05:53,880 Speaker 4: I just thought I'd take a picture and put boobs 131 00:05:53,920 --> 00:05:57,960 Speaker 4: on it. Yeah no, mate, no, mat that's really harmful 132 00:05:58,000 --> 00:05:59,000 Speaker 4: for the girl that you've done. 133 00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:00,400 Speaker 5: That's funny. 134 00:06:00,520 --> 00:06:02,200 Speaker 3: You're just going back on what you're talking about before, 135 00:06:02,200 --> 00:06:04,479 Speaker 3: where it's like, you know, people would think I'm crazy 136 00:06:04,520 --> 00:06:06,320 Speaker 3: if I was like mate to take your bike, get 137 00:06:06,320 --> 00:06:08,280 Speaker 3: out of here for six hours, go riding. You'd be like, oh, 138 00:06:08,279 --> 00:06:10,320 Speaker 3: it's a dangerous world out there. But then, and I 139 00:06:10,360 --> 00:06:11,960 Speaker 3: know this has come up before, But then we give 140 00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:16,120 Speaker 3: them a laptop and they're doing They've got access to 141 00:06:16,240 --> 00:06:17,560 Speaker 3: much more dangerous stuff and. 142 00:06:17,520 --> 00:06:20,640 Speaker 4: People, way more dangerous. And then, and I think that's 143 00:06:20,680 --> 00:06:22,760 Speaker 4: the challenge, because we think they're safe in our house, 144 00:06:23,200 --> 00:06:24,520 Speaker 4: technically they're actually. 145 00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:29,080 Speaker 5: It's yeah, it's crazy, and it's the change. 146 00:06:28,760 --> 00:06:31,440 Speaker 4: In the punting, which is why it's a chasm, not 147 00:06:31,480 --> 00:06:32,640 Speaker 4: a good generation gap. 148 00:06:32,839 --> 00:06:34,560 Speaker 3: I wanted to ask you about something that you brought 149 00:06:34,640 --> 00:06:38,320 Speaker 3: up in the past. You flagged that sometimes at the 150 00:06:38,400 --> 00:06:40,440 Speaker 3: end of the day, kids will come home from school 151 00:06:40,760 --> 00:06:43,920 Speaker 3: and they'll just melt down, won't they, Maggie. They're just 152 00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:46,120 Speaker 3: like you know, nothing will make them happy, even the 153 00:06:46,200 --> 00:06:47,159 Speaker 3: drive home from school. 154 00:06:47,160 --> 00:06:49,239 Speaker 5: I'm like, God, you really just turned on me now, Maggie. 155 00:06:49,240 --> 00:06:50,960 Speaker 5: You've said in the past to look at it differently. 156 00:06:51,040 --> 00:06:53,400 Speaker 3: You've said, rather than looking at it and going, oh, 157 00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:56,320 Speaker 3: they're angry, you suggest looking at it in a way 158 00:06:56,360 --> 00:07:00,240 Speaker 3: that they actually feel safer around us. 159 00:07:00,279 --> 00:07:05,120 Speaker 4: Get yeah, So if we hold in all our biggest feelings, 160 00:07:05,200 --> 00:07:07,960 Speaker 4: then we actually overload our nervous system and become really 161 00:07:08,040 --> 00:07:11,880 Speaker 4: volatile anywhere. So when they come home and it's the 162 00:07:11,920 --> 00:07:14,480 Speaker 4: meltdown in the car for younger kids, and it's that 163 00:07:14,560 --> 00:07:18,200 Speaker 4: one in the kitchen, you're that words, Mary whatever. What 164 00:07:18,320 --> 00:07:22,360 Speaker 4: that is is actually an incredible gift, is that they 165 00:07:22,480 --> 00:07:25,520 Speaker 4: know that that's safe enough to discharge this duff that's 166 00:07:25,520 --> 00:07:28,440 Speaker 4: inside them that well they want to get out because 167 00:07:28,440 --> 00:07:30,160 Speaker 4: you are still going to be able to love them 168 00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:33,120 Speaker 4: after that, right and in that moment, if we can 169 00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:36,240 Speaker 4: hold the ground and go, you know, pat your little 170 00:07:36,240 --> 00:07:39,080 Speaker 4: On'm nailing it what they love me the best without 171 00:07:39,120 --> 00:07:42,200 Speaker 4: going how dare they speak to me so disfull having 172 00:07:42,200 --> 00:07:44,720 Speaker 4: a groundew gate to because that's the previous generation. 173 00:07:44,840 --> 00:07:46,000 Speaker 5: But I guess that's my question. 174 00:07:46,120 --> 00:07:49,680 Speaker 4: When we're calm, we come back in and so it 175 00:07:49,800 --> 00:07:51,600 Speaker 4: easy look like you had a hard day, and usually 176 00:07:51,600 --> 00:07:54,480 Speaker 4: that's when they'll either make an apology or they'll feel lousy. 177 00:07:54,960 --> 00:07:56,360 Speaker 4: I can't do it in the heat of the moment, 178 00:07:56,400 --> 00:07:57,280 Speaker 4: because that's my question. 179 00:07:57,320 --> 00:07:59,400 Speaker 3: I guess, like you know, I was having an absolute 180 00:07:59,440 --> 00:08:01,520 Speaker 3: block one kids, one of the kids the other day, 181 00:08:01,880 --> 00:08:03,800 Speaker 3: and this is after school, and I had your voice 182 00:08:03,840 --> 00:08:05,000 Speaker 3: in the back of my head going. 183 00:08:05,840 --> 00:08:08,280 Speaker 5: To comment, how lucky am I that I'm bringing yelled out? 184 00:08:08,360 --> 00:08:09,680 Speaker 5: Not who feels comfortable? 185 00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:13,400 Speaker 3: And then I had to go, Okay, I'm going to 186 00:08:13,640 --> 00:08:15,480 Speaker 3: approach it like that, But how long do you let 187 00:08:15,520 --> 00:08:15,920 Speaker 3: that go for? 188 00:08:16,400 --> 00:08:17,960 Speaker 5: Do you know what I mean? Surely it's telling that 189 00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:19,360 Speaker 5: rewarding behavior ready? 190 00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:22,480 Speaker 4: No, no, no, that's the lens you're going through the 191 00:08:22,520 --> 00:08:26,800 Speaker 4: behaviorism lens. Aren't I rewarding that behavior? No, I'm showing 192 00:08:26,800 --> 00:08:29,760 Speaker 4: them that I am completely safe. However, what I'm going 193 00:08:29,840 --> 00:08:31,600 Speaker 4: to do when everyone's a little bit calmer and if 194 00:08:31,640 --> 00:08:34,720 Speaker 4: I've said things I shouldn't have said, the repairing of 195 00:08:34,760 --> 00:08:38,040 Speaker 4: the rupture was not something we ever did in pre 196 00:08:38,160 --> 00:08:41,480 Speaker 4: this generation, and that's what we've come in with. Oh man, 197 00:08:41,559 --> 00:08:43,760 Speaker 4: I've just you know, of course that's not the dad 198 00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:46,440 Speaker 4: I want to be. Or and we let them completely 199 00:08:46,440 --> 00:08:48,640 Speaker 4: calm down and we might go back in with like 200 00:08:48,720 --> 00:08:51,640 Speaker 4: I said to Jesture, kind of saying, wow, that was 201 00:08:51,679 --> 00:08:54,360 Speaker 4: a big blow up. Hey, once they're. 202 00:08:54,120 --> 00:08:58,000 Speaker 3: Calm, yeah, Like so do you think just walking away 203 00:08:58,120 --> 00:08:59,280 Speaker 3: adding distance at that point? 204 00:08:59,640 --> 00:09:02,679 Speaker 4: I think it depends. So when they're really calm, if 205 00:09:02,679 --> 00:09:04,800 Speaker 4: they look make Ifhyby a fly off like that again 206 00:09:04,880 --> 00:09:07,640 Speaker 4: to want me to stay there, yeah, right, walk away. 207 00:09:08,240 --> 00:09:10,480 Speaker 4: So in other words, we're going to use We're going 208 00:09:10,520 --> 00:09:13,000 Speaker 4: to work together to work out how do I support 209 00:09:13,040 --> 00:09:17,040 Speaker 4: you when your immature brain has flipped its lips right, 210 00:09:17,320 --> 00:09:20,200 Speaker 4: because they won't do it at school, Jason, hold it 211 00:09:20,240 --> 00:09:22,200 Speaker 4: in until they get home, right, and that's after the 212 00:09:22,200 --> 00:09:24,240 Speaker 4: boy's gone and had a pool. Before he can do that. 213 00:09:24,679 --> 00:09:27,520 Speaker 1: You need you need Maggie on speed dialing. 214 00:09:27,640 --> 00:09:30,520 Speaker 5: Oh, absolutely, forget that. Maggie. We've got a spare room. 215 00:09:30,600 --> 00:09:31,840 Speaker 5: I don't know if you're looking to get out of 216 00:09:31,840 --> 00:09:34,800 Speaker 5: your door it, but i'll tell you what you know what. 217 00:09:35,920 --> 00:09:37,440 Speaker 3: I don't know if you want to move in after 218 00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:41,040 Speaker 3: this last bit. But I thought I would ask Maggie 219 00:09:41,040 --> 00:09:42,559 Speaker 3: about remember the issue I've got with the. 220 00:09:42,520 --> 00:09:43,720 Speaker 5: Three year old at the moment. 221 00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:46,640 Speaker 3: So Maggie, our three year old Archie. We call him 222 00:09:46,640 --> 00:09:48,960 Speaker 3: the liability. 223 00:09:49,280 --> 00:09:52,600 Speaker 4: Can I just start right there? You are manifesting his reality. 224 00:09:52,679 --> 00:09:55,199 Speaker 4: So I would say, he's just wonderful and see the change. 225 00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:57,240 Speaker 5: He's a wonderful liability. 226 00:09:57,360 --> 00:10:00,000 Speaker 1: Mag Let's rebatch him. Is the shining light of your life. 227 00:10:00,200 --> 00:10:01,880 Speaker 5: It's shining light. Let's keep that in mindment. 228 00:10:01,920 --> 00:10:05,000 Speaker 3: I play this next audio because he's developed a little 229 00:10:05,000 --> 00:10:07,080 Speaker 3: bit of a habit now at the age of three, 230 00:10:07,280 --> 00:10:09,760 Speaker 3: on the weekend, I'll go, hey, achie, I'm doing dinner. 231 00:10:09,800 --> 00:10:13,280 Speaker 5: Should we do noodles or dumplings? And this is his 232 00:10:13,440 --> 00:10:20,400 Speaker 5: common response at the moment. That was him in the. 233 00:10:21,840 --> 00:10:29,160 Speaker 4: Okay, and guess what he's let that word from. So 234 00:10:29,240 --> 00:10:31,000 Speaker 4: at the end of the day, Oh my god, there's 235 00:10:31,040 --> 00:10:34,320 Speaker 4: such mirrors. And it's one of the scariest bits is 236 00:10:34,360 --> 00:10:36,600 Speaker 4: that we think they don't hearers, and of course quite 237 00:10:36,640 --> 00:10:39,360 Speaker 4: often they use it an extremely appropriate place. 238 00:10:40,720 --> 00:10:42,520 Speaker 5: Trying not to laugh at that. 239 00:10:42,679 --> 00:10:44,520 Speaker 4: Trying not to laugh is the hardest bit. So we're 240 00:10:44,920 --> 00:10:46,920 Speaker 4: we're just going to kind of not make a bit. 241 00:10:47,040 --> 00:10:49,120 Speaker 4: So the more you make a thing about it, the 242 00:10:49,200 --> 00:10:52,160 Speaker 4: more likely it's going to stay. And we just very 243 00:10:52,240 --> 00:10:55,520 Speaker 4: gently go high five for noodles or dumplings. Were just 244 00:10:55,600 --> 00:10:57,200 Speaker 4: moves through it. So it's not going to be a 245 00:10:57,200 --> 00:11:00,640 Speaker 4: big thing. But sometimes around the dining table and to say, look, 246 00:11:01,280 --> 00:11:03,240 Speaker 4: you know, you know how we've got to keep the words. 247 00:11:03,280 --> 00:11:05,080 Speaker 4: We really try. There's some words that we're not meant 248 00:11:05,120 --> 00:11:09,640 Speaker 4: to say. This reminds a whole table three year olds. 249 00:11:10,080 --> 00:11:12,600 Speaker 4: And then we gradually diminish the capacity for that to 250 00:11:12,640 --> 00:11:15,480 Speaker 4: become quite such a habit and then they can sometimes 251 00:11:15,559 --> 00:11:18,079 Speaker 4: literally forget to use it. But you've got to give 252 00:11:18,120 --> 00:11:20,720 Speaker 4: him other words to use in that space or another 253 00:11:20,840 --> 00:11:22,840 Speaker 4: action to do when you asked it. So that's say 254 00:11:22,880 --> 00:11:24,400 Speaker 4: you've got it. You've got to get a bit creative 255 00:11:24,920 --> 00:11:26,720 Speaker 4: and so get the older ones to play with you 256 00:11:26,800 --> 00:11:28,199 Speaker 4: on that one. So what are we doing to do it? 257 00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:30,200 Speaker 4: And they go, yeah, that's that one, whoa whoa, yeah, 258 00:11:30,679 --> 00:11:33,400 Speaker 4: a different word, and then it becomes a fun thing. 259 00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,120 Speaker 4: There's a neural pathway in the brain. We can always 260 00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:39,560 Speaker 4: change old habits by inhabiting them, but we have to 261 00:11:39,600 --> 00:11:41,840 Speaker 4: create a new habit to go over the top. 262 00:11:42,040 --> 00:11:44,200 Speaker 3: Now that you say, Now that you say they're like 263 00:11:44,240 --> 00:11:46,520 Speaker 3: sponges and it's a mirror, it makes sense because when 264 00:11:46,520 --> 00:11:48,000 Speaker 3: he said that, he was on a Lilah with a 265 00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:49,800 Speaker 3: margarita and it. 266 00:11:49,800 --> 00:11:56,360 Speaker 5: Was like looking in a mirror, which is a terrifying Maggie, 267 00:11:56,640 --> 00:11:58,200 Speaker 5: congratulations on this series. 268 00:11:58,280 --> 00:12:01,560 Speaker 4: It is an absolute were back in the chair. But Juso, 269 00:12:01,760 --> 00:12:05,160 Speaker 4: I was really really excited to be a part of 270 00:12:05,240 --> 00:12:07,520 Speaker 4: organizing it. And most of my friends are in the show. 271 00:12:07,720 --> 00:12:09,880 Speaker 3: All right, there's some great people. Amana Keller, Cake, Richie. 272 00:12:09,880 --> 00:12:12,520 Speaker 3: We love nazim As well. Maggie Dan join us on 273 00:12:12,520 --> 00:12:14,840 Speaker 3: the the role of a lifetime finale It Can Binge 274 00:12:14,840 --> 00:12:18,200 Speaker 3: It All on ABC I View Maggie, we love you. 275 00:12:18,240 --> 00:12:20,160 Speaker 3: Next time you're in Melbourne, pop past the studio. 276 00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:21,440 Speaker 4: Let's do it. 277 00:12:21,520 --> 00:12:23,080 Speaker 5: I'll give you three kids to take home. 278 00:12:23,040 --> 00:12:30,520 Speaker 1: As a get Maggie. Jason Laurens Lauren Wake Up Feeling 279 00:12:30,559 --> 00:12:36,400 Speaker 1: Good A number one hundred Jason Lauren Fly on Socials