1 00:00:00,720 --> 00:00:03,320 Speaker 1: The Fitzi and Whipper podcast really. 2 00:00:03,120 --> 00:00:06,559 Speaker 2: Really excited about this because the Resilience Project, well, I 3 00:00:06,640 --> 00:00:08,480 Speaker 2: tell you what, it has got bigger and bigger, and 4 00:00:08,480 --> 00:00:10,560 Speaker 2: there's a lot of noise around it as well, and 5 00:00:10,840 --> 00:00:12,360 Speaker 2: the man behind it you can go see at the 6 00:00:12,400 --> 00:00:15,239 Speaker 2: Sydney Opera House on September ten and to get more 7 00:00:15,680 --> 00:00:17,960 Speaker 2: info on this tour go to the Resilience Project dot 8 00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:20,639 Speaker 2: com dot are you? It is the magnificent Hugh Van. 9 00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:26,360 Speaker 3: Carl, Hugh, Welcome, Tody, thank you, thank me. Firstly, let's 10 00:00:26,360 --> 00:00:28,800 Speaker 3: talk about the word resilience because this is how it 11 00:00:28,880 --> 00:00:32,680 Speaker 3: started and we recently congratulations. We saw when Queensland won 12 00:00:32,680 --> 00:00:36,159 Speaker 3: the Origin Game three. You've got Billy Slater referencing the 13 00:00:36,200 --> 00:00:39,640 Speaker 3: talk that you gave to the boys. Firstly, can can 14 00:00:39,680 --> 00:00:42,519 Speaker 3: you talk us through what you do with teams and 15 00:00:42,520 --> 00:00:44,400 Speaker 3: what you said to the Queensland team. 16 00:00:44,800 --> 00:00:45,040 Speaker 4: Yeah. 17 00:00:45,400 --> 00:00:49,240 Speaker 1: I think as a Melbournian who's worked with the Queensland 18 00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:51,599 Speaker 1: as I might be the most unpopular I guess you've 19 00:00:51,600 --> 00:00:53,520 Speaker 1: ever had on your That's okay. 20 00:00:53,520 --> 00:00:55,880 Speaker 3: We're going to try and put team aside and work 21 00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:57,840 Speaker 3: out what the messaging really is and how we can 22 00:00:57,840 --> 00:00:58,520 Speaker 3: benefit from it. 23 00:00:58,880 --> 00:01:01,639 Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, Bo one of the things I've worked. I've 24 00:01:01,680 --> 00:01:03,560 Speaker 1: been very lucky to work with a lot of elite 25 00:01:03,600 --> 00:01:05,840 Speaker 1: sporting teams, and what I've found is one of the 26 00:01:05,880 --> 00:01:10,600 Speaker 1: common traits of really successful sides is that they there's 27 00:01:10,760 --> 00:01:12,560 Speaker 1: like they have this sort of mindset of just they're 28 00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:15,959 Speaker 1: very grateful for the like they're just I remember sitting 29 00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:19,120 Speaker 1: down with Billy Slater in about it was February this 30 00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:20,560 Speaker 1: year and he first caught up with me and said, 31 00:01:20,560 --> 00:01:22,280 Speaker 1: I'd love you to work with the Queenslanders this year. 32 00:01:22,319 --> 00:01:23,600 Speaker 1: I love you to do this. We could do this, 33 00:01:23,720 --> 00:01:26,040 Speaker 1: we could do that. And I don't follow rugby league 34 00:01:26,040 --> 00:01:27,640 Speaker 1: at all, so I said, yeah, sounds good. And I 35 00:01:27,640 --> 00:01:30,840 Speaker 1: said and I said, who's incidentally, who's coached this year? 36 00:01:31,400 --> 00:01:33,560 Speaker 1: And he said, oh, that's me. 37 00:01:33,680 --> 00:01:35,960 Speaker 3: Course, good start. 38 00:01:37,520 --> 00:01:38,320 Speaker 4: It was a great start. 39 00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:41,520 Speaker 1: But what I've found is that the elite sporting teams 40 00:01:41,520 --> 00:01:44,600 Speaker 1: that play really well, they're just really happy with the 41 00:01:44,640 --> 00:01:46,720 Speaker 1: opportunity that I've got. They don't worry too much about 42 00:01:46,760 --> 00:01:48,360 Speaker 1: the outcome. They don't worry about what if I don't 43 00:01:48,360 --> 00:01:50,800 Speaker 1: get pitched, what's my salary, what's my contract. It's more 44 00:01:50,920 --> 00:01:53,320 Speaker 1: just as a kid growing up, was my dream to 45 00:01:53,440 --> 00:01:54,840 Speaker 1: for example, playstat of origin. 46 00:01:54,840 --> 00:01:55,800 Speaker 4: What am I doing right now? 47 00:01:55,880 --> 00:01:57,800 Speaker 1: I'm playstut of Origin and I just focus on the 48 00:01:57,800 --> 00:01:59,680 Speaker 1: stuff they do have rather than worry about the things 49 00:01:59,720 --> 00:02:01,360 Speaker 1: they have all the things that might go wrong with 50 00:02:01,440 --> 00:02:02,720 Speaker 1: the things outside of their control. 51 00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:07,440 Speaker 2: Well, Hugh, that's a great point. And team environment a 52 00:02:07,480 --> 00:02:09,480 Speaker 2: lot of people, and it doesn't have to be with sport. 53 00:02:09,600 --> 00:02:12,440 Speaker 2: You it's with work and your life as well. But 54 00:02:13,280 --> 00:02:17,680 Speaker 2: there's a lot of people that they can't really well, 55 00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:20,240 Speaker 2: they can't deal with a team environment. There's a lot 56 00:02:20,240 --> 00:02:22,880 Speaker 2: of individuals. I know when I was playing footy at 57 00:02:22,880 --> 00:02:24,959 Speaker 2: the Sydneys Ones. When I was there, there are a 58 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:26,840 Speaker 2: lot of individuals and a lot of guys that were 59 00:02:26,840 --> 00:02:29,200 Speaker 2: going out there and trying to get their possessions up 60 00:02:29,240 --> 00:02:32,200 Speaker 2: and looking after their game. It was interesting that when 61 00:02:32,200 --> 00:02:34,560 Speaker 2: I left the Sydney Swes they brought in a no 62 00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:37,240 Speaker 2: pad policy and then they started winning, which was really 63 00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:38,920 Speaker 2: weird with the year that they got rid of me. 64 00:02:40,520 --> 00:02:43,880 Speaker 2: But it is really really interesting that when you have 65 00:02:44,160 --> 00:02:47,160 Speaker 2: a cancer in a team like that, or someone that 66 00:02:47,440 --> 00:02:49,560 Speaker 2: is individual and doesn't want to be a part of 67 00:02:49,600 --> 00:02:52,640 Speaker 2: the team environment, how it can bring everybody else down. 68 00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:54,200 Speaker 1: I was on the plane on the way up the 69 00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:57,520 Speaker 1: State of Origin camp. I like to you before the 70 00:02:57,520 --> 00:02:59,600 Speaker 1: first game. It was a ten day camp and I 71 00:02:59,639 --> 00:03:03,040 Speaker 1: was literally studying their faces on I'd printed out all 72 00:03:03,080 --> 00:03:05,120 Speaker 1: their faces, all their names, all their background, so. 73 00:03:05,040 --> 00:03:06,320 Speaker 4: I didn't know who anyone was. 74 00:03:06,919 --> 00:03:08,520 Speaker 1: And when I was looking at them, I was thinking, oh, 75 00:03:08,600 --> 00:03:11,799 Speaker 1: my gosh, not only are these ginormous men, they're also 76 00:03:12,000 --> 00:03:15,079 Speaker 1: ginormous names. They're they're like, they're big time, They're amazing 77 00:03:16,040 --> 00:03:18,160 Speaker 1: and so. But they were kind of the opposite of 78 00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:19,960 Speaker 1: what I'd expected when I got into camp. They were 79 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:23,600 Speaker 1: the most humble, down to earth. I mean, I'm a 80 00:03:23,680 --> 00:03:26,680 Speaker 1: no one. I came from Victoria of someone who has 81 00:03:26,760 --> 00:03:30,960 Speaker 1: no idea about rugby league. But they were so warm, 82 00:03:31,240 --> 00:03:36,080 Speaker 1: so inviting, so welcoming. And I think that sort of 83 00:03:36,080 --> 00:03:39,280 Speaker 1: speaks to your point, Fitz. I really think there was 84 00:03:39,320 --> 00:03:42,080 Speaker 1: no one there who was really focused on you know, 85 00:03:42,200 --> 00:03:43,600 Speaker 1: I need to be the best player of the series. 86 00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:45,400 Speaker 1: I need to be I need to stand out here, 87 00:03:45,440 --> 00:03:47,040 Speaker 1: I need to be the man or whatever. During the 88 00:03:47,080 --> 00:03:49,680 Speaker 1: first camp and my first presentation, I said, put your 89 00:03:49,680 --> 00:03:51,440 Speaker 1: hand up if it was your dream to play Statu 90 00:03:51,520 --> 00:03:53,440 Speaker 1: Origin as a kid, And every single hand went up, 91 00:03:53,880 --> 00:03:55,000 Speaker 1: and I said, look what you're. 92 00:03:54,840 --> 00:03:55,440 Speaker 4: Doing right now. 93 00:03:55,560 --> 00:03:57,480 Speaker 1: Have a look at this, how lucky you and the 94 00:03:57,560 --> 00:03:59,560 Speaker 1: smiles on their faces because I already knew. I don't 95 00:03:59,560 --> 00:04:00,800 Speaker 1: think they really they didn't me, to be honest, I 96 00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:02,720 Speaker 1: think it was a bit of a long time, but anyway, 97 00:04:03,920 --> 00:04:05,400 Speaker 1: you know, they got it good gratitude. 98 00:04:05,400 --> 00:04:06,880 Speaker 4: Good gratitude is the ability. 99 00:04:06,560 --> 00:04:08,920 Speaker 1: To pay attention to what you've got, not worry about 100 00:04:08,920 --> 00:04:10,600 Speaker 1: what you know, what you don't have, and we struggle 101 00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:13,320 Speaker 1: with that in Australia. We spend so much time focusing 102 00:04:13,320 --> 00:04:15,400 Speaker 1: on the stuff we don't have. We have got so 103 00:04:15,600 --> 00:04:18,240 Speaker 1: much here and so we miss the things we have 104 00:04:18,279 --> 00:04:21,360 Speaker 1: all the time. And these boys were incredibly grateful growth. 105 00:04:21,920 --> 00:04:24,400 Speaker 5: The Resilience Project does a lot of work obviously with 106 00:04:24,520 --> 00:04:28,000 Speaker 5: schools as well as businesses and sporting teams. What's sort 107 00:04:28,040 --> 00:04:30,239 Speaker 5: of one of the main things you try and enforce 108 00:04:30,320 --> 00:04:33,520 Speaker 5: to the kids that obviously parents listening as well, could 109 00:04:33,560 --> 00:04:35,880 Speaker 5: carry that message at home because it is something that 110 00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:39,000 Speaker 5: with kids as a parent you know and you would 111 00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:40,920 Speaker 5: know this that you want to be able to, you know, 112 00:04:41,040 --> 00:04:43,760 Speaker 5: support them to be resilient to grow up with that. 113 00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:47,560 Speaker 1: I think the main message, I mean, we preach gratitude, 114 00:04:47,720 --> 00:04:50,120 Speaker 1: empathy and mindful, and I said the three tenants of 115 00:04:50,120 --> 00:04:51,720 Speaker 1: what we speak about. But I was thinking about this 116 00:04:51,720 --> 00:04:53,680 Speaker 1: the other night, and I think we've got around four 117 00:04:53,760 --> 00:04:56,480 Speaker 1: hundred and twenty thousand kids doing our curriculum every day 118 00:04:56,520 --> 00:04:58,800 Speaker 1: around Australia, and I was and I was looking through 119 00:04:58,839 --> 00:05:01,240 Speaker 1: our curriculum and I think one of the main points 120 00:05:01,279 --> 00:05:03,120 Speaker 1: we're try and get across is that. 121 00:05:03,040 --> 00:05:06,080 Speaker 4: You are enough. You know, as you are right now. 122 00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:07,240 Speaker 4: You are enough. 123 00:05:07,279 --> 00:05:10,200 Speaker 1: We're all so desperately trying to achieve a certain amount 124 00:05:10,200 --> 00:05:13,000 Speaker 1: of success, you know, a certain amount of popularity, to 125 00:05:13,120 --> 00:05:15,800 Speaker 1: be you know, earn a certain amount of money, whatever 126 00:05:15,839 --> 00:05:18,159 Speaker 1: it is. And I think deep we're all trying so 127 00:05:18,960 --> 00:05:22,680 Speaker 1: hard to be accepted, to belong, to be recognized, which 128 00:05:22,720 --> 00:05:25,560 Speaker 1: is all fine, but I think we need to understand 129 00:05:25,640 --> 00:05:26,760 Speaker 1: that we. 130 00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:28,760 Speaker 4: Are enough as we are. You know, we are enough 131 00:05:28,839 --> 00:05:29,240 Speaker 4: right now. 132 00:05:29,279 --> 00:05:31,600 Speaker 1: And I think it is so important kids here at 133 00:05:31,600 --> 00:05:33,840 Speaker 1: a young age, Hey, the way you are right now, 134 00:05:34,080 --> 00:05:34,839 Speaker 1: you are enough. 135 00:05:36,320 --> 00:05:38,520 Speaker 2: That is so important because I didn't have that from 136 00:05:38,520 --> 00:05:39,080 Speaker 2: my old man. 137 00:05:39,160 --> 00:05:40,320 Speaker 4: You didn't. 138 00:05:40,560 --> 00:05:42,599 Speaker 2: I didn't have that at all. And I look back 139 00:05:42,680 --> 00:05:45,719 Speaker 2: now and i've but you know what the best thing is, Hugh, 140 00:05:45,920 --> 00:05:47,680 Speaker 2: is that my old man and I have sat down 141 00:05:47,720 --> 00:05:51,680 Speaker 2: and spoken about this, because there were years there where 142 00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:53,440 Speaker 2: I go, there's no way I can bring this up 143 00:05:53,480 --> 00:05:55,960 Speaker 2: with Dad. He will think this is a sign of weakness. 144 00:05:56,040 --> 00:05:58,320 Speaker 2: He won't want to talk to me about it. But 145 00:05:58,440 --> 00:06:01,200 Speaker 2: you the day that I did, remember, he broke down 146 00:06:01,200 --> 00:06:04,080 Speaker 2: with tears and he said, I am so glad that 147 00:06:04,120 --> 00:06:06,240 Speaker 2: you did this. And in a way I resented him 148 00:06:06,240 --> 00:06:07,920 Speaker 2: because I'm like, you should have been the one that 149 00:06:08,040 --> 00:06:11,719 Speaker 2: having this conversation, not your son. But now it is 150 00:06:11,839 --> 00:06:15,320 Speaker 2: unbelievable how just a simple chat like that can change 151 00:06:15,480 --> 00:06:18,839 Speaker 2: your life and the relationship that I have with my father. 152 00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:21,240 Speaker 2: Now we hug each other. We never did that before. 153 00:06:21,240 --> 00:06:22,960 Speaker 2: We say I love you to each other. We never 154 00:06:23,040 --> 00:06:24,040 Speaker 2: ever did that before. 155 00:06:24,320 --> 00:06:24,920 Speaker 4: Incredible. 156 00:06:25,040 --> 00:06:28,080 Speaker 1: I mean, it's such a huge act of vulnerability on 157 00:06:28,160 --> 00:06:29,760 Speaker 1: your part to do that. 158 00:06:30,160 --> 00:06:30,960 Speaker 4: It's funny you say that. 159 00:06:31,200 --> 00:06:33,359 Speaker 1: Just looking back on the camp I have with the 160 00:06:33,400 --> 00:06:35,640 Speaker 1: Origin boys, I think that was a big part of 161 00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:38,080 Speaker 1: I was really asking him to be vulnerable and just 162 00:06:38,279 --> 00:06:41,080 Speaker 1: to say I love you, to tell the people that 163 00:06:41,120 --> 00:06:42,600 Speaker 1: you love, you love, all that kind of stuff, because 164 00:06:42,600 --> 00:06:46,159 Speaker 1: the more vulnerable you are, the more authentically connected you are. 165 00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:48,480 Speaker 1: And that's exactly what you've experienced with your old Man 166 00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:51,480 Speaker 1: and I just I love that fit hit She. 167 00:06:51,560 --> 00:06:53,400 Speaker 3: The other thing too, when you flip the coin then, 168 00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:57,040 Speaker 3: and I loved your podcast the interview with Missy Higgins, 169 00:06:58,120 --> 00:07:01,640 Speaker 3: and she spoke about how she is, the anxiety and 170 00:07:01,640 --> 00:07:05,000 Speaker 3: the nerves she would have about releasing new music and 171 00:07:05,120 --> 00:07:09,000 Speaker 3: am I any good? Can I do this? So there's 172 00:07:09,040 --> 00:07:13,560 Speaker 3: the idea of being believing that you're enough, But when 173 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:16,720 Speaker 3: it comes to needing the strength required to take a 174 00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:20,640 Speaker 3: leap or back yourself, how do you drive people towards 175 00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:21,680 Speaker 3: finding that strength. 176 00:07:22,040 --> 00:07:24,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, I think a lot of us don't take that step, 177 00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:27,200 Speaker 1: or we don't take a risk because we're so scared. 178 00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:28,440 Speaker 4: Of failing, especially in Australia. 179 00:07:28,600 --> 00:07:31,440 Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely absolutely. I think so many of us are 180 00:07:31,480 --> 00:07:34,000 Speaker 1: really scared of failure, and I think it holds so 181 00:07:34,040 --> 00:07:36,080 Speaker 1: many of us back. But failure is it is so 182 00:07:36,240 --> 00:07:39,240 Speaker 1: important to fail. We're all we all fail all the time. 183 00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:41,640 Speaker 1: We stuff up all the time. It took me about 184 00:07:41,680 --> 00:07:43,240 Speaker 1: an hour to work out the tech stuff to get 185 00:07:43,240 --> 00:07:47,760 Speaker 1: this ins but that's part of our stories. You know, 186 00:07:48,000 --> 00:07:51,040 Speaker 1: we're human beings, We're imperfect, we stuff up all the time, 187 00:07:51,080 --> 00:07:53,680 Speaker 1: we fail, and I think we need to embrace that 188 00:07:53,760 --> 00:07:56,640 Speaker 1: a little bit more I mean we spoke about I 189 00:07:56,720 --> 00:07:58,240 Speaker 1: started to just come back to start of older, and 190 00:07:58,440 --> 00:08:00,960 Speaker 1: we spoke about all the failure they've had along the 191 00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:03,280 Speaker 1: way to get to where they are, and how they 192 00:08:03,280 --> 00:08:05,520 Speaker 1: have actually been the most important part of their journey 193 00:08:05,600 --> 00:08:08,160 Speaker 1: and they are there because of their failures throughout their 194 00:08:08,200 --> 00:08:11,480 Speaker 1: career and the things I've learned throughout their losing last 195 00:08:11,520 --> 00:08:13,800 Speaker 1: year Daily Choir. Evans spoke about the pain of losing 196 00:08:13,880 --> 00:08:17,160 Speaker 1: last year, but he's turned his pain into drive. He 197 00:08:17,320 --> 00:08:21,760 Speaker 1: turned his failure into a success. And I think that's 198 00:08:22,080 --> 00:08:24,000 Speaker 1: we go to come back to your question. I think 199 00:08:24,040 --> 00:08:26,520 Speaker 1: Missy Higgins talking about that. You know, Missy, I don't 200 00:08:26,560 --> 00:08:31,560 Speaker 1: think Missy realizes that she's Famous's quite really, I don't 201 00:08:31,600 --> 00:08:34,280 Speaker 1: realize how good she is. No, she doesn't at all. 202 00:08:34,880 --> 00:08:37,040 Speaker 1: But it's funny, It's it's a weird. Glenn Robins on 203 00:08:37,160 --> 00:08:40,840 Speaker 1: our podcast The Imperfect Saturday, and he spoke about his 204 00:08:40,960 --> 00:08:43,520 Speaker 1: self doubt that he gets when he goes on panel shows, 205 00:08:43,559 --> 00:08:45,360 Speaker 1: and he said, I just sit there and get stressed. 206 00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:47,360 Speaker 4: And I think, am I Am I being funny? Should 207 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:47,760 Speaker 4: I say this? 208 00:08:47,840 --> 00:08:49,960 Speaker 1: Well? I think of me and I think I thought 209 00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:53,360 Speaker 1: if Glenn Robbins half out doing a panel show. In 210 00:08:53,400 --> 00:08:56,559 Speaker 1: my head, that's like like Lebron James getting self out 211 00:08:56,559 --> 00:09:00,520 Speaker 1: before basketball. So I think it's important to remember that 212 00:09:00,559 --> 00:09:03,400 Speaker 1: we all experience self doubt. We all have this inner 213 00:09:03,440 --> 00:09:05,480 Speaker 1: critic which just nags at us all the time. We 214 00:09:05,520 --> 00:09:07,760 Speaker 1: all have this inner critic, and I think it's important 215 00:09:07,760 --> 00:09:10,440 Speaker 1: to just accept it. Yeah, we're human, that's part of 216 00:09:10,440 --> 00:09:12,600 Speaker 1: being human. We'll doubt ourselves from time to time. But 217 00:09:12,640 --> 00:09:14,880 Speaker 1: I think remembering it's okay to fail, it's okay to 218 00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:16,760 Speaker 1: stuff up, and embracing that as part. 219 00:09:16,600 --> 00:09:18,440 Speaker 4: Of who we are, and knowing that we're enough. 220 00:09:18,440 --> 00:09:20,920 Speaker 1: Like I'm enough. I don't need to absolutely know all 221 00:09:20,960 --> 00:09:22,360 Speaker 1: this interview. It would be nice, but if I don't, 222 00:09:22,400 --> 00:09:23,080 Speaker 1: I'm still enough. 223 00:09:23,160 --> 00:09:25,000 Speaker 2: On the other side of the coin, Hugh, is that 224 00:09:25,080 --> 00:09:30,079 Speaker 2: when you do succeed and Hugh, you're killing this interview. Congratulations. 225 00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:31,559 Speaker 2: I don't know if it's just one you are that 226 00:09:31,720 --> 00:09:34,240 Speaker 2: it's really good for me too. But see when you do, 227 00:09:34,840 --> 00:09:37,560 Speaker 2: that's the thing that becomes addictive, is that you want 228 00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:39,760 Speaker 2: that feeling all the time, and failing is so good. 229 00:09:39,800 --> 00:09:41,840 Speaker 2: And I'm trying to teach my boys that now, is 230 00:09:41,840 --> 00:09:44,600 Speaker 2: that you can learn from this and find that drive. 231 00:09:45,040 --> 00:09:47,520 Speaker 2: They're never never going to make that mistake again. And 232 00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:49,680 Speaker 2: my boys now you know, with footy and stuff like 233 00:09:49,679 --> 00:09:51,280 Speaker 2: that as well, they'll have a good win or they'll 234 00:09:51,280 --> 00:09:53,199 Speaker 2: have a great game and I'll see the smile on 235 00:09:53,240 --> 00:09:55,640 Speaker 2: their face afterwards, and I'll go, you know that feeling 236 00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:56,360 Speaker 2: you've got. 237 00:09:56,120 --> 00:09:57,000 Speaker 3: Now, chase that. 238 00:09:57,040 --> 00:09:58,880 Speaker 2: You chase that every time, and you know what, you 239 00:09:58,880 --> 00:10:01,200 Speaker 2: won't get it every time, but how good a feeling. 240 00:10:01,280 --> 00:10:03,640 Speaker 2: That's the addiction that you're wanting your life. 241 00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:05,960 Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, I'm sure you guys experienced this with 242 00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:07,720 Speaker 1: what you do with work all the time. You have 243 00:10:07,800 --> 00:10:11,400 Speaker 1: these incredible moments throughout your career and you think this 244 00:10:11,880 --> 00:10:14,160 Speaker 1: is really great, but it has become a bit of 245 00:10:14,160 --> 00:10:16,400 Speaker 1: a trap. It's addictive. It's like when you don't get that, 246 00:10:16,480 --> 00:10:17,400 Speaker 1: you're like, oh, what's happening? 247 00:10:17,440 --> 00:10:21,120 Speaker 4: Am I? You know, you're constantly chasing that moment. 248 00:10:21,440 --> 00:10:27,240 Speaker 1: I think one of the lovely messages for kids, And 249 00:10:27,320 --> 00:10:31,520 Speaker 1: I heard this through Ben Crow, who mentors while work 250 00:10:31,559 --> 00:10:35,360 Speaker 1: at a party. I'm very good friends with Crow, and 251 00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:38,480 Speaker 1: we were talking about this with our kids and he said, 252 00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:41,640 Speaker 1: the best thing you can say to your kids, if 253 00:10:41,640 --> 00:10:44,400 Speaker 1: it's playing sport, whatever it is, the message is wind 254 00:10:44,440 --> 00:10:46,719 Speaker 1: lose or draw best on ground, worst on ground. The 255 00:10:46,760 --> 00:10:50,120 Speaker 1: messages I love watching you play. I just love watching 256 00:10:50,160 --> 00:10:52,040 Speaker 1: your play, and that's it. We don't want them to 257 00:10:52,080 --> 00:10:54,600 Speaker 1: feel like I mean, I work with a lot of 258 00:10:54,960 --> 00:10:58,160 Speaker 1: elite sports people now, a lot of AFL clubs, Fitzy, 259 00:10:58,360 --> 00:11:00,880 Speaker 1: and what I'm trying to undo is that these young 260 00:11:00,960 --> 00:11:03,280 Speaker 1: men feel like they need to win to get people 261 00:11:03,280 --> 00:11:05,360 Speaker 1: to love them more, or to play well, because they 262 00:11:05,440 --> 00:11:07,320 Speaker 1: know that when they play well it makes their family 263 00:11:07,440 --> 00:11:09,880 Speaker 1: so happy, it makes their family so bad. So when 264 00:11:09,920 --> 00:11:12,280 Speaker 1: they don't win, they have the opposite. They go, well, 265 00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:15,240 Speaker 1: they are not proud of me. Now they're not not. 266 00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:18,640 Speaker 1: And so there's a particular young man I'm working with 267 00:11:18,760 --> 00:11:20,880 Speaker 1: one of the IFL clubs at the moment, who he said, 268 00:11:21,000 --> 00:11:22,520 Speaker 1: my family went through a bit growing up. We had 269 00:11:22,559 --> 00:11:25,439 Speaker 1: a tough childhood, right, but I knew that if I 270 00:11:25,559 --> 00:11:28,080 Speaker 1: played really well, I'd make everyone happy. And he said 271 00:11:28,240 --> 00:11:30,640 Speaker 1: that was fifteen years ago, and now I'm still playing 272 00:11:30,679 --> 00:11:33,200 Speaker 1: OFL football and if I don't play well, I think 273 00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:36,000 Speaker 1: I've let my family down. And so we've been change 274 00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:37,800 Speaker 1: to their family about the message is hey, I love 275 00:11:37,840 --> 00:11:38,440 Speaker 1: watching you play. 276 00:11:38,480 --> 00:11:38,880 Speaker 4: That's it. 277 00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:41,000 Speaker 1: I don't care if you get five touches or thirty 278 00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:41,640 Speaker 1: five touches. 279 00:11:41,679 --> 00:11:42,760 Speaker 4: I love watching you play. 280 00:11:43,679 --> 00:11:46,400 Speaker 1: Some beautiful messages come through Origin Camp from the families 281 00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:48,880 Speaker 1: of these boys, just letting them know that exact thing 282 00:11:48,960 --> 00:11:49,600 Speaker 1: I'm just proud of. 283 00:11:49,640 --> 00:11:51,800 Speaker 4: Its really good, isn't it. 284 00:11:52,240 --> 00:11:54,720 Speaker 3: I think what you're saying too about you know you 285 00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:57,880 Speaker 3: are enough. I think that's priceless in that you talk 286 00:11:57,920 --> 00:12:02,240 Speaker 3: about family and relationship foremoths. I think every kid, and 287 00:12:02,280 --> 00:12:05,440 Speaker 3: I know I'm not sure about relationships between father and 288 00:12:05,640 --> 00:12:09,520 Speaker 3: daughter and mother and daughter says, but every guy always 289 00:12:09,559 --> 00:12:12,760 Speaker 3: wants to do their dad proud. That doesn't matter what 290 00:12:12,880 --> 00:12:15,160 Speaker 3: age they are. You know, I still want to do 291 00:12:15,240 --> 00:12:17,160 Speaker 3: my dad proud. If I was to be the best 292 00:12:17,200 --> 00:12:19,920 Speaker 3: person on radio and it was announced across the world 293 00:12:19,960 --> 00:12:21,679 Speaker 3: that I was the best radio person and I climbed 294 00:12:21,760 --> 00:12:24,120 Speaker 3: Mount Everest, and I want a Brownlow medal. It's still 295 00:12:24,360 --> 00:12:26,480 Speaker 3: sometimes for me, but his dad proud. 296 00:12:26,960 --> 00:12:28,840 Speaker 2: And you'll get you You'll get their one. 297 00:12:28,880 --> 00:12:33,520 Speaker 3: Do you think so played footing since I was sixteen? 298 00:12:33,520 --> 00:12:35,480 Speaker 2: But you think I can win a brown Low anyday? 299 00:12:35,840 --> 00:12:37,440 Speaker 3: Fitzy, I just love watching you play. 300 00:12:42,240 --> 00:12:47,480 Speaker 2: I love that it is fascinating. What I really love 301 00:12:47,720 --> 00:12:51,080 Speaker 2: the most with you and guys like ben Crow now 302 00:12:51,200 --> 00:12:54,040 Speaker 2: is that you know, parents are really freaking up there 303 00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:56,959 Speaker 2: is now and listening to guys like you like this 304 00:12:57,280 --> 00:13:01,640 Speaker 2: at the generation of our parents is never around, you know, 305 00:13:01,880 --> 00:13:04,559 Speaker 2: like no one spoke about this stuff and it's I 306 00:13:05,280 --> 00:13:07,280 Speaker 2: just put you put a smile on my face here. 307 00:13:07,280 --> 00:13:09,880 Speaker 2: You've always got a smile on your face anyway, which 308 00:13:09,920 --> 00:13:11,920 Speaker 2: I love about you as well. And I don't know 309 00:13:11,920 --> 00:13:14,120 Speaker 2: if it's always been like that to you, but I 310 00:13:14,160 --> 00:13:17,000 Speaker 2: think you put smiles on everyone else's faces as well. Mate, 311 00:13:17,040 --> 00:13:19,040 Speaker 2: So we appreciate your time. If you would like to 312 00:13:19,080 --> 00:13:21,200 Speaker 2: go see you, he's at the Sydney Opera House on 313 00:13:21,240 --> 00:13:23,400 Speaker 2: September ten. It's the Resilience Project and you can go 314 00:13:23,480 --> 00:13:26,960 Speaker 2: to Resilience project dot com. Do you get more details there, mate, 315 00:13:27,040 --> 00:13:28,840 Speaker 2: Thank you for your time here and thanks for coming 316 00:13:28,880 --> 00:13:33,600 Speaker 2: on the show. Thanks guys, Buddy, thank you and Whipper 317 00:13:33,679 --> 00:13:34,239 Speaker 2: Podcast