WEBVTT - 9/11 Survivor | Tom Canavan

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<v Speaker 1>Approche Production.

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<v Speaker 2>Welcome to Secrets of the Underworld.

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<v Speaker 1>I am Neil the Muscle comments.

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<v Speaker 3>And in this episode, I speak to Tom Canavan, survivor

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<v Speaker 3>of the nine eleven terrorist attacks.

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<v Speaker 1>And it hit behind us. When the plane hit, we

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<v Speaker 1>jumped up again when they started bringing down people from

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<v Speaker 1>upstairs that were burnt. Horrible. If your thing just came

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<v Speaker 1>in and I was just placed it to the ground,

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<v Speaker 1>she was there and then she wasn't. I heard noises

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<v Speaker 1>around me and things started hitting around me, which it

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<v Speaker 1>was people jumping, and I was starting to get hit.

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<v Speaker 1>I was hit with a leg. Thanks for coming on, Tom,

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<v Speaker 1>You're welcome.

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<v Speaker 3>My question before we get into the nitty gritty, I

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<v Speaker 3>just want to know about you as a person before

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<v Speaker 3>we know, like living in New York and your family

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<v Speaker 3>growing up, and then we'll.

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<v Speaker 2>Get into how you got your job in the Twin Towers,

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<v Speaker 2>if that's all right.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, I'm from New York City originally, I'm born in

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<v Speaker 1>New York City, Manhattan. When I was a baby, we

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<v Speaker 1>lived in the Times Square area Hell's Kitchen, so I'm

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<v Speaker 1>a Hell's Kitchen kid forty second Street, so kind of

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<v Speaker 1>when you grow up in the city, you know your

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<v Speaker 1>block is everything. Ye you fight with guys on the

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<v Speaker 1>block over from you, but then if someone else picks

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<v Speaker 1>on you, it's sort of like a brother thing. Then

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<v Speaker 1>it's your two blocks against whoever is coming into your

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<v Speaker 1>neighborhood at the time, you know, And that's been being

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<v Speaker 1>a kid, a teenager. You sort of mine your own business.

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<v Speaker 1>You don't people, you don't look people in the eye,

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<v Speaker 1>but you're always aware of your environment around you. So

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<v Speaker 1>that was I grew up there, and then when I

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<v Speaker 1>was a teenager, we moved to one of the suburbs

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<v Speaker 1>and Queens it's actually not a suburb, it's one of

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<v Speaker 1>the five boroughs, but it was called Sunnyside, Queens very

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<v Speaker 1>very Irish. I'm kind of in you know, Irish, you know, Irish,

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<v Speaker 1>Irish bar every block and Sunnyside is only about nine

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<v Speaker 1>blocks long and is at lee the twenty five bars

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<v Speaker 1>on those nine blocks. So so again, growing up in

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<v Speaker 1>you know, in the city, you you you become hardened

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<v Speaker 1>to certain things, but you also become aware of what's

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<v Speaker 1>going on around you. And as a kid, history has

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<v Speaker 1>always been my favorite subject. And one of the things

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<v Speaker 1>that I loved about history that I always read were

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<v Speaker 1>sort of a disaster, the Titanic, the San Francisco earthquake,

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<v Speaker 1>the Chicago fire. It always fascinated me, and I think

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<v Speaker 1>I realized earlier that I'm reading this because people survived

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<v Speaker 1>it and they got to tell the story. Otherwise no

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<v Speaker 1>one would really know some of you know, some of

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<v Speaker 1>the true things that go on. Of course, they're not

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<v Speaker 1>being any internet. Everything was rumors back then. Now people

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<v Speaker 1>just make up anything they want put it on the internet,

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<v Speaker 1>you know. So, and as far as working in the building,

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<v Speaker 1>I had been doing banking. It was First Union Bank

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<v Speaker 1>at the time, was just turning into Wakobia Bank, and

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<v Speaker 1>we had moved into the trade center. Now my second

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<v Speaker 1>job that I had for twenty years, I was a

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<v Speaker 1>project manager for commercial movies. So I had done a

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<v Speaker 1>lot of jobs in the trade center. I also knew

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<v Speaker 1>that when your company made money, you moved up in

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<v Speaker 1>the building. When your company wasn't doing as well, you

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<v Speaker 1>were moving to the lower flows. So because I had

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<v Speaker 1>done a lot of work in the building, I knew

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<v Speaker 1>where the elevators were, I knew where all the staircases were.

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<v Speaker 1>And it just by happenstance, the company I was working for,

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<v Speaker 1>we moved from down there Wall Street into the trade

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<v Speaker 1>center of May of that year Memorial than weekend. So

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<v Speaker 1>I was only on the forty seventh floor. I wasn't

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<v Speaker 1>you know, only about not even halfway up in the

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<v Speaker 1>North Tower. But that's how I ended up working there.

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<v Speaker 1>But again I had knowledge of the building of the

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<v Speaker 1>you know, of the interior of the building in the

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<v Speaker 1>parking lot, and I sort of knew my way around

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<v Speaker 1>the place.

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<v Speaker 3>Okay, So now now we know that you've you've gone

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<v Speaker 3>in there, talk me through the day before.

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<v Speaker 4>A normal day at the tower for you, just a

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<v Speaker 4>normal day, all right.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, for my normal day, I would get up at

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<v Speaker 1>about five o'clock in the morning. I lived. I was

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<v Speaker 1>living ninety miles away at the time in the Lower

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<v Speaker 1>Hudson Valley Fishkill, New York. So I would catch I

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<v Speaker 1>would drive to the train station, catch the Metro North,

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<v Speaker 1>take that train to Grand Central, hop on the subway.

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<v Speaker 1>So it was about a two and a half hour

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<v Speaker 1>ride each way, so about five hours a day I

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<v Speaker 1>was traveling. Because of my job. I was doing what

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<v Speaker 1>was pretty new at the time on Wall Street. It

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<v Speaker 1>was Euroclear, it was called we were dealing with Europe

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<v Speaker 1>mainly Cardiff. We were going to through Cardiff and Wales,

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<v Speaker 1>so because the market opened earlier, instead of a nine

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<v Speaker 1>o'clock start for my area, we had an eight o'clock

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<v Speaker 1>start here, being with a time difference you know, over

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<v Speaker 1>in England. So that was my day. I would get

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<v Speaker 1>to the office between probably around seven point thirty to

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<v Speaker 1>eight o'clock. On the nice days, I would when I

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<v Speaker 1>got out of subway, i'd walk across the plaza. If

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<v Speaker 1>it was crappy weather, i'd stay underground because you never

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<v Speaker 1>had to leave the World Trade Center, you know. The

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<v Speaker 1>mall in there had one hundred stores in it. You

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<v Speaker 1>could do all your Christmas shopping. There were doctors, there

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<v Speaker 1>were dentists everything. There was a post office in there.

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<v Speaker 1>You know. You never had to leave the place if

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<v Speaker 1>you didn't want to come outside. But so so i'd

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<v Speaker 1>get there. Sometimes it was if I was really early,

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<v Speaker 1>a little early, i'd have coffee outside on the plaza

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<v Speaker 1>and then go upstairs to work, which was a kind

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<v Speaker 1>of normal thing for a lot of people who worked

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<v Speaker 1>in the trade center. But because of the markets, I

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<v Speaker 1>had to be in by eight o'clock instead of nine o'clock.

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<v Speaker 3>With the morning of the nine to eleven and when

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<v Speaker 3>it all the chargity happened. Do you ever have you

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<v Speaker 3>ever like, do you ever get suspicious or any to like,

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<v Speaker 3>you know, like feel things differently when it happened later on?

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<v Speaker 2>Did you ever feel that way?

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<v Speaker 1>No, not at all. In fact, in the morning, coming in,

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<v Speaker 1>I slept on the train because everybody sleeps on the

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<v Speaker 1>train coming in. Everybody usually drinks on the way home,

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<v Speaker 1>on the train going home. But no, it was. It

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<v Speaker 1>was a normal day. I mean, it was what they

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<v Speaker 1>used to call Indian summer. Now now it's called like

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<v Speaker 1>global warming, I guess, but you know, it was September.

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<v Speaker 1>It was beautiful out, no clouds, it was still warm.

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<v Speaker 1>The summer was just about over. So I had, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>a light jacket. But it was to me, it was

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<v Speaker 1>just a normal day. It was a Tuesday. Every Tuesday.

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<v Speaker 1>There was an Amish market that was out on the plaza,

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<v Speaker 1>which I used to find funny because I used to think, well,

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<v Speaker 1>they're Amish, But how did they get here? And I

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<v Speaker 1>see trucks, like, but money's money, you know, But no,

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<v Speaker 1>it was. It was just come in, go upstairs and

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<v Speaker 1>start work. Nothing, nothing out of the ordinary, just just

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<v Speaker 1>a Tuesday.

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<v Speaker 3>Tell me if you can't remember fifteen minutes before it

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<v Speaker 3>all happened.

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<v Speaker 1>So At I was in my boss's office at the time.

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<v Speaker 1>So we had the forty seventh floor of one World Trade,

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<v Speaker 1>which is the North Tower, and our office was on

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<v Speaker 1>the west side of the building, so we faced the

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<v Speaker 1>Hudson River in New Jersey on the other side. So

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<v Speaker 1>in the southwest corner in my boss's office, you'd be

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<v Speaker 1>able to see the Statue of Liberty, New York Harver.

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<v Speaker 1>You could see the bridge, the Barrizonal Bridge, plus all

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<v Speaker 1>the Jersey Liberty State Park everything and Ellis Island. So

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<v Speaker 1>her office, of course had the corner, and we were

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<v Speaker 1>in there because we were on a meeting call with

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<v Speaker 1>Our home office was in Charlotte, North Carolina, so that's

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<v Speaker 1>where we were on a meeting with those At about

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<v Speaker 1>eight thirty quarter to nine was the meeting, so we

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<v Speaker 1>were all shoved in that off. There were about eight

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<v Speaker 1>of us in that and the first plane hit at

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<v Speaker 1>eight forty, so it hit my building, but it hit

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<v Speaker 1>on the up. It hit them around the ninety second floor,

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<v Speaker 1>so I was about halfway up to where it hit

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<v Speaker 1>and it hit behind us when a lot of the

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<v Speaker 1>debris went straight through the building. So as we were

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<v Speaker 1>looking in south when the plane hit, we jumped up

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<v Speaker 1>because the building actually rocks where you're almost thrown off

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<v Speaker 1>your feet, and it sort of wobbled three times and

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<v Speaker 1>then it righted itself. But I could see south stuff falling,

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<v Speaker 1>panes of glass, concrete, things that don't register at the time,

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<v Speaker 1>but when you think about it later, pieces of airplane

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<v Speaker 1>like you see like seatbelt buckles or a seat. You know,

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<v Speaker 1>there wasn't that much left of it, but yeah, So

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<v Speaker 1>I went over by the window that faced south. I

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<v Speaker 1>looked down the Married Hotel, which was twenty four floors,

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<v Speaker 1>was attached to the south tower, and I could see

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<v Speaker 1>the roof of that was on fire that were causing

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<v Speaker 1>the street on fire. And my first thought was it

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<v Speaker 1>was like a gas explosion of something, because you know,

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<v Speaker 1>nobody envisions an airliner hitting your building. Yeah, you know

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<v Speaker 1>in down in Manhattan. When it hit, we, like I said,

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<v Speaker 1>we jumped up. We wobble back and forth. I went

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<v Speaker 1>at it to the main office to see what was

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<v Speaker 1>going on with the people out there. They were starting

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<v Speaker 1>smoke starting to come in under some of the doorways

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<v Speaker 1>that we had two doorways in our office that led

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<v Speaker 1>two staircases out of the building. But another thing about

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<v Speaker 1>growing up in New York City is when you learn

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<v Speaker 1>with the fire departments. As a kid, when I when

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<v Speaker 1>we called the cops, sometimes they didn't show up. When

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<v Speaker 1>you called an ambulance, sometimes it didn't show up. But

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<v Speaker 1>when someone rang that fire alarm, they were coming. So

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<v Speaker 1>you have the utmost confidence in the New York City

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<v Speaker 1>Fire Department. And I could see some of their rigs

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<v Speaker 1>pulling up outside the building. So as people were panicked,

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<v Speaker 1>starting to get a little nervous, I was telling them

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<v Speaker 1>I'd fire apartments here, We're okay, it's above us, we

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<v Speaker 1>can get out below some of the smoke coming in.

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<v Speaker 1>I took my jacket from my desk and I shoved

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<v Speaker 1>it under the door so the smoke wouldn't come in,

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<v Speaker 1>and I took the back of my hand I was

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<v Speaker 1>tapping it against the doorknob because heat conducts through the metal,

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<v Speaker 1>and if the doorknob is hot, you do not open

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<v Speaker 1>that door. That means it's fire on the other side

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<v Speaker 1>of the door. But the smoke was coming in, it

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<v Speaker 1>was like, all right, let's get our stuff together, let's

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<v Speaker 1>get out again. We didn't. We didn't know the magnitude of,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, what was going on upstairs. And because we

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<v Speaker 1>worked in a bank, we had a lot of securities

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<v Speaker 1>out that you just can't run out and leave. You know,

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<v Speaker 1>they're worth a lot of money, and we had we

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<v Speaker 1>actually had a vault on the floor with a little

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<v Speaker 1>moat that you needed a bridge. It was like forty

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<v Speaker 1>seven tons suspended in on our floor. So a lot

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<v Speaker 1>of our employees were taking their bonds and stuff off

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<v Speaker 1>their desk, putting it in their lock boxes and bringing

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<v Speaker 1>into the vault. At which time I said, all right,

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<v Speaker 1>you guys, do that. I went out into the hallway.

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<v Speaker 1>We had the electronic eyes at the time you swipe

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<v Speaker 1>your card to get in and out of the floor.

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<v Speaker 1>I asked someone to hold the door open for me

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<v Speaker 1>so I could get back in. We had a satellite

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<v Speaker 1>office around the other side of the building, and each building,

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<v Speaker 1>each floor was one acre. It was two hundred feet

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<v Speaker 1>each side. So I ran to the satellite office. I

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<v Speaker 1>know we had three girls working in there. I wanted

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<v Speaker 1>to see if they were okay. When I got there,

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<v Speaker 1>there was nobody in there. It turns out one was

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<v Speaker 1>off that day. One was bringing her kid to first

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<v Speaker 1>day of school, which was September eleventh that year, So

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<v Speaker 1>that saved a lot of people from being in the

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<v Speaker 1>building because first day of school, what a parents do,

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<v Speaker 1>They bring their kids to school. So she wasn't in,

0:11:54.681 --> 0:11:56.441
<v Speaker 1>and the third girl that was in there, as soon

0:11:56.481 --> 0:11:59.281
<v Speaker 1>as the plane hit took off, smartest one out of everyone,

0:11:59.921 --> 0:12:03.681
<v Speaker 1>she was out of there on her way out. So

0:12:03.721 --> 0:12:06.721
<v Speaker 1>I went back to my office. Then people were putting

0:12:07.121 --> 0:12:10.121
<v Speaker 1>wet rags over their faces, and on the way there,

0:12:10.161 --> 0:12:12.401
<v Speaker 1>I passed one of the staircases. I opened the door.

0:12:12.441 --> 0:12:15.001
<v Speaker 1>It was just a massive people coming down the steps.

0:12:15.361 --> 0:12:17.121
<v Speaker 1>So by the time I got back to my office,

0:12:17.121 --> 0:12:19.321
<v Speaker 1>I told everybody, we're getting out of here. Let's go.

0:12:21.281 --> 0:12:23.321
<v Speaker 1>We went to that doorway, but by then it was

0:12:23.361 --> 0:12:26.961
<v Speaker 1>so crowded you couldn't get in the staircase. But since

0:12:27.001 --> 0:12:30.761
<v Speaker 1>I knew it that was stairwell C stairwell B, I

0:12:30.801 --> 0:12:32.281
<v Speaker 1>knew it was in the center of the building, so

0:12:32.321 --> 0:12:35.481
<v Speaker 1>I ran to stairwell B. There was like nobody in there.

0:12:35.921 --> 0:12:38.361
<v Speaker 1>So by the time I got back, though we had

0:12:38.401 --> 0:12:42.121
<v Speaker 1>sixty people working with us, they were about thirty left.

0:12:42.361 --> 0:12:44.881
<v Speaker 1>The other thirty had squeezed into the staircase. I said,

0:12:45.081 --> 0:12:47.801
<v Speaker 1>come on, come with me, there's an empty staircase, and

0:12:47.841 --> 0:12:53.081
<v Speaker 1>then we proceeded down in stairwell B. It started to

0:12:53.121 --> 0:12:53.961
<v Speaker 1>get crowded, though.

0:12:54.321 --> 0:12:57.601
<v Speaker 3>You know by this time Tom is panic stations going

0:12:57.921 --> 0:13:00.441
<v Speaker 3>like dramatically or He's all still kind of like what's

0:13:00.481 --> 0:13:00.921
<v Speaker 3>going on.

0:13:01.761 --> 0:13:06.001
<v Speaker 1>There's no panic. There was never a panic for when

0:13:06.001 --> 0:13:08.961
<v Speaker 1>the plane hit again. You know, ignorance is bliss. We

0:13:09.041 --> 0:13:13.361
<v Speaker 1>had no idea what was going on upstairs. It was

0:13:13.441 --> 0:13:15.201
<v Speaker 1>sort of like being out for a walk with a

0:13:15.201 --> 0:13:18.561
<v Speaker 1>lot of people. Everyone was very courteous coming down the steps.

0:13:18.561 --> 0:13:21.761
<v Speaker 1>It was everybody was helping each other. There was no

0:13:21.881 --> 0:13:25.121
<v Speaker 1>smoke in the stairwells because after the nineteen ninety three attack,

0:13:25.841 --> 0:13:29.521
<v Speaker 1>the stairwells were reconfigured and air was pumped into them.

0:13:29.681 --> 0:13:33.521
<v Speaker 1>The lighting was changed. There were fluorescent strips, so all

0:13:33.521 --> 0:13:36.601
<v Speaker 1>the lights were on. Everybody was just walking down, helping

0:13:36.641 --> 0:13:39.641
<v Speaker 1>each other. We got down into the twenties and then

0:13:39.721 --> 0:13:43.761
<v Speaker 1>they they stopped us. There were some firefighters coming up,

0:13:44.121 --> 0:13:46.201
<v Speaker 1>so we had to go single file on the steps

0:13:46.401 --> 0:13:50.121
<v Speaker 1>on the right side. They were carrying, some of them

0:13:50.161 --> 0:13:54.801
<v Speaker 1>seventy pounds of equipment. They estimated it took about a

0:13:54.841 --> 0:13:59.201
<v Speaker 1>minute to walk one floor and they were going up

0:13:59.281 --> 0:14:01.361
<v Speaker 1>ninety two floors, so it was gonna take them about

0:14:01.361 --> 0:14:04.401
<v Speaker 1>an hour and a half to walk up there. And

0:14:04.441 --> 0:14:06.921
<v Speaker 1>that was the before the start to even put out

0:14:06.961 --> 0:14:10.681
<v Speaker 1>the fire, which at that time they believed they can do. Yeah,

0:14:11.601 --> 0:14:13.881
<v Speaker 1>we didn't know also on the way down that the

0:14:13.921 --> 0:14:16.761
<v Speaker 1>South Tower had been hit. We were in the staircase

0:14:17.601 --> 0:14:20.521
<v Speaker 1>with all the noise in the footsteps and people talking.

0:14:20.601 --> 0:14:25.121
<v Speaker 1>We really didn't, you know. Notice I didn't find out

0:14:25.201 --> 0:14:30.561
<v Speaker 1>till much later the day anyway, But they stopped us.

0:14:30.601 --> 0:14:32.761
<v Speaker 1>The fire department came up. We were passing up some

0:14:32.761 --> 0:14:36.041
<v Speaker 1>of their equipment. Some of us were breaking into the

0:14:36.161 --> 0:14:38.441
<v Speaker 1>vending machines, taking out some of the bottles of water

0:14:38.481 --> 0:14:42.041
<v Speaker 1>and juice and giving it to the firefighters. I remember

0:14:42.081 --> 0:14:43.721
<v Speaker 1>I took a bottle of water I poured over a

0:14:43.761 --> 0:14:46.161
<v Speaker 1>firefighter's head. He was sitting sweating, and to which he

0:14:46.241 --> 0:14:49.001
<v Speaker 1>yelled at me, you know, I'm kidding. You know you're

0:14:49.001 --> 0:14:51.481
<v Speaker 1>trying to drown me. I'm not. You know, what are

0:14:51.521 --> 0:14:53.401
<v Speaker 1>you doing? Go ahead, just get out, Just get out,

0:14:53.441 --> 0:14:56.201
<v Speaker 1>they kept saying. And we got down to the teens

0:14:56.241 --> 0:14:58.641
<v Speaker 1>at that point, and then they stopped us again. But

0:14:58.681 --> 0:15:02.721
<v Speaker 1>they started bringing down people from upstairs that were burnt horrible,

0:15:03.001 --> 0:15:07.521
<v Speaker 1>like yeah, they were even blinking. They just came down.

0:15:07.561 --> 0:15:10.961
<v Speaker 1>There wasn't a sound and it got very quiet. I

0:15:10.961 --> 0:15:13.561
<v Speaker 1>can see one lady, she must have had a cross

0:15:13.601 --> 0:15:15.881
<v Speaker 1>on her chest. It was the indentation of it. The

0:15:15.921 --> 0:15:19.161
<v Speaker 1>metal burnt into her chest. Some of the people the

0:15:19.241 --> 0:15:22.441
<v Speaker 1>skin was peeled back, and I think at that point

0:15:22.521 --> 0:15:27.001
<v Speaker 1>we started to realize, you know, something a little more important,

0:15:27.041 --> 0:15:30.281
<v Speaker 1>bigger was going on than we knew upstairs. And once

0:15:30.321 --> 0:15:32.921
<v Speaker 1>they got them past us, it was like, all right,

0:15:33.001 --> 0:15:37.881
<v Speaker 1>let's start, get a move on a little faster. My

0:15:38.041 --> 0:15:42.121
<v Speaker 1>staircase b you had the plaza level, which was on

0:15:42.161 --> 0:15:45.201
<v Speaker 1>the street level, you had which also known as a mezzanine,

0:15:45.881 --> 0:15:49.521
<v Speaker 1>and then you had the lower level, which was where

0:15:49.521 --> 0:15:53.881
<v Speaker 1>them all was with the stores the concourse, and our

0:15:53.921 --> 0:15:57.401
<v Speaker 1>staircase emptied out onto the concourse. So when we came

0:15:57.441 --> 0:16:01.001
<v Speaker 1>out of the elevators, out of the steps the elevators

0:16:01.001 --> 0:16:02.961
<v Speaker 1>that were down there, all the doors were blown off.

0:16:03.841 --> 0:16:07.561
<v Speaker 1>The lobby of of the trade center at one time

0:16:07.641 --> 0:16:10.321
<v Speaker 1>was beautiful white marble. A lot of the marble was

0:16:10.401 --> 0:16:13.841
<v Speaker 1>on the floor cracked, and the walls were scorched or

0:16:13.881 --> 0:16:18.521
<v Speaker 1>blackened by the elevators. There were piles of rags in

0:16:18.521 --> 0:16:23.041
<v Speaker 1>front of the elevators, just smoking. And I remember asking

0:16:23.281 --> 0:16:25.321
<v Speaker 1>some of the firefighters there, like I stopped and I'm

0:16:25.321 --> 0:16:27.041
<v Speaker 1>looking at them, you know what is that? And they

0:16:27.041 --> 0:16:30.561
<v Speaker 1>were just saying, just go down the concourse Headford Krispy

0:16:30.641 --> 0:16:32.761
<v Speaker 1>Kreme Donuts because if you worked in the trades, said,

0:16:32.801 --> 0:16:35.921
<v Speaker 1>everybody knew where Krispy Kreme was. They didn't want people

0:16:35.921 --> 0:16:40.161
<v Speaker 1>going in the street with all the debris falling, people jumping.

0:16:41.081 --> 0:16:43.401
<v Speaker 1>You know. Another thing we didn't know at the time.

0:16:44.121 --> 0:16:48.961
<v Speaker 1>And as we started to exit out there onto the

0:16:49.001 --> 0:16:52.681
<v Speaker 1>concourse level, all of the doors had been shattered. They

0:16:52.721 --> 0:16:55.801
<v Speaker 1>had big, huge revolving doors, and it was that safety

0:16:55.841 --> 0:16:57.681
<v Speaker 1>glass that you see in bus stops, a sort of

0:16:57.721 --> 0:17:01.121
<v Speaker 1>half plastic and half glass where it doesn't really shatter,

0:17:01.241 --> 0:17:04.401
<v Speaker 1>but it gets very slippery. And all of the sprinklers

0:17:04.401 --> 0:17:07.201
<v Speaker 1>were on. So I was last in line of the

0:17:07.241 --> 0:17:11.960
<v Speaker 1>forty people I was with. When we got to the

0:17:12.041 --> 0:17:14.480
<v Speaker 1>front doors, now we were forty feet down. We were

0:17:14.481 --> 0:17:17.201
<v Speaker 1>about four stories down at that point in the mall.

0:17:19.281 --> 0:17:21.121
<v Speaker 1>I heard a noise behind me. There was an elderly

0:17:21.160 --> 0:17:23.761
<v Speaker 1>couple coming through. They were sort of sliding around. They

0:17:23.801 --> 0:17:26.200
<v Speaker 1>had some bags, and I told the people I was

0:17:26.241 --> 0:17:29.481
<v Speaker 1>with keep going to where they want us to go.

0:17:29.640 --> 0:17:31.880
<v Speaker 1>I'll catch up with you. And I turned around and

0:17:31.880 --> 0:17:34.120
<v Speaker 1>went back inside. I helped the people through the doors,

0:17:34.761 --> 0:17:36.881
<v Speaker 1>and I turned to catch up. I got maybe ten

0:17:36.921 --> 0:17:39.041
<v Speaker 1>feet out, and all of a sudden I heard this

0:17:39.160 --> 0:17:43.640
<v Speaker 1>rumble and felt like this heat pushing pushing down in

0:17:43.721 --> 0:17:46.880
<v Speaker 1>a wind and a thumping noise. And one of the

0:17:46.921 --> 0:17:48.921
<v Speaker 1>women with me that I had come down the whole way.

0:17:48.961 --> 0:17:53.241
<v Speaker 1>Her name was Antonett Duger. She was maybe twenty feet

0:17:53.241 --> 0:17:55.400
<v Speaker 1>in front of me, and she turned and stopped and

0:17:55.400 --> 0:17:57.360
<v Speaker 1>looked at me, and I just looked at her, like,

0:17:57.561 --> 0:18:00.640
<v Speaker 1>what's that noise? But it was getting faster and faster.

0:18:01.600 --> 0:18:05.521
<v Speaker 1>I mean, I can't even describe a thousand locomotives coming down.

0:18:06.321 --> 0:18:09.681
<v Speaker 1>And I yelled at her to get in a doorway,

0:18:09.961 --> 0:18:11.801
<v Speaker 1>like they tell you to do an earthquakes, it's the

0:18:11.840 --> 0:18:15.001
<v Speaker 1>most stable. I didn't even think I got that out

0:18:15.001 --> 0:18:17.400
<v Speaker 1>of my mouth when all of a sudden, everything just

0:18:17.441 --> 0:18:20.080
<v Speaker 1>came in and I was just plasted to the ground.

0:18:20.640 --> 0:18:25.680
<v Speaker 1>She was there and then she wasn't. I don't know

0:18:25.681 --> 0:18:29.200
<v Speaker 1>if I was knocked unconscious, but a peace fell like

0:18:29.241 --> 0:18:32.240
<v Speaker 1>a tent leaned to and it hit the top of

0:18:32.241 --> 0:18:36.840
<v Speaker 1>my head, knocked me down and buried me. So again,

0:18:36.880 --> 0:18:38.360
<v Speaker 1>I don't know if I was knocked out, but my

0:18:38.481 --> 0:18:42.120
<v Speaker 1>first thought was, wow, I'm dead. I mean it was

0:18:42.201 --> 0:18:45.001
<v Speaker 1>I didn't hear anything, I couldn't see anything. And then

0:18:45.041 --> 0:18:47.961
<v Speaker 1>it was like, wow, that wasn't too bad. I didn't

0:18:47.961 --> 0:18:51.001
<v Speaker 1>feel anything if I'm dead, you know. But then I

0:18:51.120 --> 0:18:54.600
<v Speaker 1>was thinking my son was turning three on September seventeenth,

0:18:54.721 --> 0:18:57.600
<v Speaker 1>and my wife was pregnant with my daughter at the time,

0:18:58.600 --> 0:19:00.201
<v Speaker 1>so I was like, okay, I'm not dead. I could

0:19:00.281 --> 0:19:04.880
<v Speaker 1>taste grit in my teeth and sand, and by then

0:19:05.041 --> 0:19:08.360
<v Speaker 1>there were little fires all over the place. But I

0:19:08.640 --> 0:19:11.001
<v Speaker 1>couldn't really move. You couldn't. I couldn't even get on

0:19:11.001 --> 0:19:14.081
<v Speaker 1>my knees. That's how compact it was. I felt concrete

0:19:14.120 --> 0:19:16.761
<v Speaker 1>above my head and I fell for the edge and

0:19:16.801 --> 0:19:19.480
<v Speaker 1>I said, all right, so the ceiling probably fell in.

0:19:19.561 --> 0:19:22.241
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna crawl out on top, and then I'm gonna

0:19:22.241 --> 0:19:25.200
<v Speaker 1>follow everyone out because no matter what happens to you,

0:19:25.201 --> 0:19:29.281
<v Speaker 1>your brain never catches up. I even think to this day,

0:19:29.360 --> 0:19:32.080
<v Speaker 1>all the things that happened, it hasn't caught up. Yet,

0:19:33.041 --> 0:19:36.680
<v Speaker 1>and I started moving and somebody grabbed my ankle and

0:19:36.840 --> 0:19:38.920
<v Speaker 1>I said, who's that because I couldn't see who it was,

0:19:39.561 --> 0:19:42.840
<v Speaker 1>and they said, I'm a security guard. If we stay here,

0:19:42.840 --> 0:19:45.120
<v Speaker 1>they'll find us. And I said to him, if you

0:19:45.160 --> 0:19:47.080
<v Speaker 1>stay here, you're either gonna suffocate or you're gonna burn

0:19:47.160 --> 0:19:50.321
<v Speaker 1>to death. I said, I got a birthday party to plan,

0:19:50.521 --> 0:19:52.441
<v Speaker 1>and I have to see my daughter be born. I'm

0:19:52.441 --> 0:19:56.001
<v Speaker 1>out of here. And I started just crawling and then

0:19:56.281 --> 0:20:02.241
<v Speaker 1>the gentleman came behind me. We tunneled up just over

0:20:02.880 --> 0:20:06.600
<v Speaker 1>I don't remember any furniture glass. I remember his concrete rebar.

0:20:07.840 --> 0:20:10.561
<v Speaker 1>Every now and then like muffled voices if someone wants

0:20:10.561 --> 0:20:12.120
<v Speaker 1>to throw a blanket over you and throw you in

0:20:12.120 --> 0:20:16.080
<v Speaker 1>a closet and shut the door. And that's sort of

0:20:16.120 --> 0:20:19.680
<v Speaker 1>the only thing I heard at that point. And they

0:20:19.721 --> 0:20:22.241
<v Speaker 1>askedimate about twenty minutes of digging. It would seemed like

0:20:22.281 --> 0:20:25.961
<v Speaker 1>ten seconds for me. Yeah, but I felt some air

0:20:26.360 --> 0:20:28.200
<v Speaker 1>and I stuck my hand through. I was out in

0:20:28.321 --> 0:20:32.400
<v Speaker 1>the center of the plaza and I said to the guy,

0:20:32.481 --> 0:20:35.121
<v Speaker 1>we're in the street. I said, I don't know how,

0:20:35.201 --> 0:20:39.441
<v Speaker 1>but you know, And I couldn't fit through the rebody

0:20:39.481 --> 0:20:41.761
<v Speaker 1>get out at that point, and I said to him.

0:20:41.961 --> 0:20:45.281
<v Speaker 1>Now I could see him. He was thinner and older

0:20:45.321 --> 0:20:48.521
<v Speaker 1>than me, and I said, I'll push you out. See

0:20:48.521 --> 0:20:50.881
<v Speaker 1>if you can move some stuff so I could get out.

0:20:51.600 --> 0:20:54.041
<v Speaker 1>And I did that and I waited. I didn't see anything,

0:20:54.321 --> 0:20:56.720
<v Speaker 1>and then I stuck my head out. I'm getting like

0:20:56.761 --> 0:20:58.721
<v Speaker 1>a prairie dog that you see they stick the head

0:20:58.721 --> 0:21:03.200
<v Speaker 1>out of a hole. And he was walking away and

0:21:03.241 --> 0:21:06.960
<v Speaker 1>I was like, yo, I can't get out, and he

0:21:07.120 --> 0:21:09.321
<v Speaker 1>just kept saying, come on, come on. And I noticed

0:21:09.400 --> 0:21:11.160
<v Speaker 1>at that point he had like his shoes must have

0:21:11.160 --> 0:21:14.160
<v Speaker 1>got knocked off somewhere. He had no shoes on, and

0:21:15.001 --> 0:21:17.481
<v Speaker 1>he sort of left me. And as I was watching,

0:21:17.640 --> 0:21:21.080
<v Speaker 1>a whole bunch of things fell and big puff of smoke,

0:21:21.281 --> 0:21:26.680
<v Speaker 1>and the next thing I know, he was gone. So

0:21:26.801 --> 0:21:28.920
<v Speaker 1>now I figured, okay, I need to get out. I

0:21:29.001 --> 0:21:31.721
<v Speaker 1>squeezed through the hole. I was scraped from the top

0:21:31.761 --> 0:21:34.681
<v Speaker 1>of my head to my feet and now I'm standing

0:21:34.721 --> 0:21:37.640
<v Speaker 1>on a beam and I could feel my shoes starting

0:21:37.921 --> 0:21:40.521
<v Speaker 1>to melt into the beam like on a hot day,

0:21:40.561 --> 0:21:43.161
<v Speaker 1>if you're ever walking on tar, you feel that give.

0:21:44.080 --> 0:21:47.640
<v Speaker 1>And I'm sort of shuffling my feet and I'm wet

0:21:47.721 --> 0:21:50.801
<v Speaker 1>from the sprinklers being on, and I'm all glooey from

0:21:50.921 --> 0:21:54.600
<v Speaker 1>all the concrete dust and powder which is wet stuck

0:21:54.640 --> 0:21:57.360
<v Speaker 1>to me. And I'm glancing up and I see my

0:21:57.481 --> 0:22:00.640
<v Speaker 1>tower still there, and okay, it didn't dawn on me.

0:22:00.681 --> 0:22:02.881
<v Speaker 1>What happened was the South tower had fallen on top

0:22:02.921 --> 0:22:06.160
<v Speaker 1>of us while we were on the ground on the

0:22:06.160 --> 0:22:08.440
<v Speaker 1>way out. That's what it had hit us. And as

0:22:08.521 --> 0:22:11.281
<v Speaker 1>I started shuffling my feet, I knew I couldn't go

0:22:11.321 --> 0:22:13.001
<v Speaker 1>the way he went because I could see some of

0:22:13.001 --> 0:22:16.080
<v Speaker 1>the parking levels, so I knew the plaza had collapsed in.

0:22:17.640 --> 0:22:21.440
<v Speaker 1>But then I heard noises around me and things started

0:22:21.481 --> 0:22:25.840
<v Speaker 1>hitting around me, which it was people jumping, and one

0:22:25.880 --> 0:22:27.961
<v Speaker 1>of the things I got I was starting to get hit.

0:22:28.001 --> 0:22:29.840
<v Speaker 1>I was hit with a leg someone jumped and I

0:22:29.880 --> 0:22:33.401
<v Speaker 1>guess when they hit whatever they hit. The leke came

0:22:33.921 --> 0:22:36.080
<v Speaker 1>just across hit me off the shoulder. If I didn't

0:22:36.120 --> 0:22:39.161
<v Speaker 1>see it out of my peripheral it would have taken

0:22:39.160 --> 0:22:42.321
<v Speaker 1>my head off. But then it was like, okay, I

0:22:42.360 --> 0:22:44.961
<v Speaker 1>can't stand here. And then I remember there was a

0:22:45.001 --> 0:22:48.680
<v Speaker 1>staircase on Vesey Street on the north side, so I

0:22:48.721 --> 0:22:51.241
<v Speaker 1>worked my way over to there, where there were escalators

0:22:51.281 --> 0:22:54.681
<v Speaker 1>going down to the street and what's called the Survivor staircase.

0:22:54.721 --> 0:22:56.840
<v Speaker 1>If you ever come down to the nine eleven Memorial,

0:22:57.241 --> 0:22:59.080
<v Speaker 1>it's still here. You could look it up out there.

0:23:00.761 --> 0:23:02.240
<v Speaker 1>It was a way off the plaza that I was

0:23:02.281 --> 0:23:05.360
<v Speaker 1>protected overhead, which a lot of people were able to

0:23:05.481 --> 0:23:09.801
<v Speaker 1>use to get off. And there were two workers there

0:23:09.840 --> 0:23:12.440
<v Speaker 1>and they looked like they've seen a ghost. When I emerged,

0:23:12.761 --> 0:23:15.481
<v Speaker 1>I had no idea what I looked like. I didn't

0:23:15.481 --> 0:23:17.840
<v Speaker 1>know I was hurt. You know, Adrenaline is a great thing.

0:23:18.360 --> 0:23:22.321
<v Speaker 1>My arms were like cannonballs. I was moving things that

0:23:22.400 --> 0:23:24.201
<v Speaker 1>I could tendem Me couldn't move on a good day,

0:23:24.360 --> 0:23:28.200
<v Speaker 1>you know. And they said, all right, head down to

0:23:28.241 --> 0:23:30.041
<v Speaker 1>the street. When I got up to the corner of

0:23:30.360 --> 0:23:35.561
<v Speaker 1>of VESSI and church people start interviewing me that I

0:23:35.600 --> 0:23:38.321
<v Speaker 1>don't know if you've seen on the internet the interviews

0:23:38.360 --> 0:23:40.920
<v Speaker 1>with me in the street. Again, I didn't know I

0:23:40.961 --> 0:23:43.521
<v Speaker 1>was hurt. And at that point an FBI agent came

0:23:43.561 --> 0:23:45.480
<v Speaker 1>along and he grabbed my arm and he said, we

0:23:45.521 --> 0:23:48.400
<v Speaker 1>can't stand here, we need to move. We were only

0:23:48.400 --> 0:23:51.881
<v Speaker 1>a block from the North Tower, and we got maybe

0:23:52.321 --> 0:23:54.440
<v Speaker 1>half a block away, and then the North Tower started

0:23:54.441 --> 0:23:57.201
<v Speaker 1>to come down. So some of the video I see,

0:23:57.441 --> 0:24:00.281
<v Speaker 1>I'm looking back up. The last thing I remember happening

0:24:00.360 --> 0:24:03.120
<v Speaker 1>was three people just hold hands and jump jump as

0:24:03.160 --> 0:24:06.720
<v Speaker 1>the building was coming down, and they just broke apart.

0:24:06.761 --> 0:24:08.801
<v Speaker 1>They look like if you took a rag doll through

0:24:08.801 --> 0:24:12.440
<v Speaker 1>it in the air. So I got up against the

0:24:12.481 --> 0:24:15.200
<v Speaker 1>building put sort of put one arm over my head.

0:24:16.761 --> 0:24:18.720
<v Speaker 1>Two of the things that you know on TV. In

0:24:18.761 --> 0:24:22.201
<v Speaker 1>the video, you see the plane hit the building. What

0:24:22.281 --> 0:24:24.321
<v Speaker 1>you don't see is you know it's an inch high

0:24:24.360 --> 0:24:27.360
<v Speaker 1>on your TV set. In real life, the hole in

0:24:27.400 --> 0:24:29.600
<v Speaker 1>that building was a sixth story hole. If you could

0:24:29.681 --> 0:24:31.721
<v Speaker 1>pick a six story building and putting in, you could

0:24:31.761 --> 0:24:34.600
<v Speaker 1>plug it into that hole. The other thing was the

0:24:34.640 --> 0:24:37.761
<v Speaker 1>smoke that you see that comes up the streets, sort

0:24:37.761 --> 0:24:39.200
<v Speaker 1>of like if you were ever at the beach and

0:24:39.241 --> 0:24:40.880
<v Speaker 1>the tide comes in. You see the wave and it

0:24:40.961 --> 0:24:44.521
<v Speaker 1>hits you. You don't see the drift wood, the shells,

0:24:45.600 --> 0:24:48.321
<v Speaker 1>anything else that's in that wave. Well, in that smoke,

0:24:49.441 --> 0:24:52.200
<v Speaker 1>you don't see the desks, the file cabinets, the chairs,

0:24:52.281 --> 0:24:56.680
<v Speaker 1>the telephones, the people, the file cabinets, the copy machines.

0:24:57.160 --> 0:24:59.321
<v Speaker 1>You don't see anything that would be in one hundred

0:24:59.321 --> 0:25:02.360
<v Speaker 1>and ten story building. All you see the smoke, but

0:25:02.521 --> 0:25:05.400
<v Speaker 1>all that stuff is in there and somehow, you know.

0:25:05.441 --> 0:25:08.761
<v Speaker 1>I got knocked around a few things, but I made

0:25:08.761 --> 0:25:11.680
<v Speaker 1>it up by city Hall, where police officers grabbed me.

0:25:12.840 --> 0:25:15.001
<v Speaker 1>They asked me, you know where you're going. I said

0:25:15.041 --> 0:25:18.600
<v Speaker 1>I had enough today, I was going home. They said

0:25:18.600 --> 0:25:20.441
<v Speaker 1>where do you live. I told him Fishkill, New York

0:25:20.481 --> 0:25:23.200
<v Speaker 1>and he said that's like upstate. I said ninety miles

0:25:23.640 --> 0:25:25.001
<v Speaker 1>and they said how are you getting there? I said,

0:25:25.001 --> 0:25:28.480
<v Speaker 1>I'm walking, you know, total shock, and they said you

0:25:28.521 --> 0:25:30.120
<v Speaker 1>need to come with us. So they grabbed me. They

0:25:30.160 --> 0:25:33.201
<v Speaker 1>put me in an ambulance. I went up to Beth

0:25:33.321 --> 0:25:35.961
<v Speaker 1>Israel Hospital. When we got there, I was the only

0:25:36.001 --> 0:25:39.480
<v Speaker 1>one there. They had doctors, nurses, gurneys in the street

0:25:40.321 --> 0:25:43.281
<v Speaker 1>and they took me out. They said, well, he's critical,

0:25:43.281 --> 0:25:46.440
<v Speaker 1>and I was, who's you know? Critical? I'm fine, I'm fine.

0:25:47.080 --> 0:25:49.041
<v Speaker 1>So they brought me in. I didn't realize I had

0:25:49.120 --> 0:25:53.921
<v Speaker 1>fractured my skull. I got burnt, pretty good cuts, bruises,

0:25:53.921 --> 0:25:56.721
<v Speaker 1>I had a little fractured bone, just my nose here.

0:25:56.961 --> 0:25:59.680
<v Speaker 1>But they brought me in. They cut my clothes off.

0:26:00.321 --> 0:26:02.880
<v Speaker 1>I had to go through two tanks of oxygen because

0:26:02.921 --> 0:26:06.440
<v Speaker 1>of all the smoke, to call them monoxide, to call

0:26:06.521 --> 0:26:11.161
<v Speaker 1>them dioxide, the open wounds with god knows what chemicals, asbestos,

0:26:11.201 --> 0:26:15.920
<v Speaker 1>everything else. And as they were stitching and stapling my

0:26:15.961 --> 0:26:19.160
<v Speaker 1>head up, I was watching the TV seeing the towers

0:26:19.160 --> 0:26:21.640
<v Speaker 1>come down, and I kept saying, like, what happened? And

0:26:21.640 --> 0:26:24.360
<v Speaker 1>they were like, you were there, But I was like,

0:26:25.041 --> 0:26:27.681
<v Speaker 1>you know, I have no recollection that this happening at

0:26:27.681 --> 0:26:31.681
<v Speaker 1>the time. And then they hooked me up. They left

0:26:31.721 --> 0:26:33.961
<v Speaker 1>me alone in the room, at which time I was like,

0:26:34.001 --> 0:26:36.241
<v Speaker 1>all right, I've had enough. I'm not a good patient

0:26:36.681 --> 0:26:39.241
<v Speaker 1>at the hospitals. And I sat up, I pulled the

0:26:39.281 --> 0:26:41.321
<v Speaker 1>tubes out, I went out in the hole. I went

0:26:41.321 --> 0:26:44.121
<v Speaker 1>into a dirty scrub bin and I put dirty scrubs

0:26:44.120 --> 0:26:47.120
<v Speaker 1>on and I put them on and I walked out

0:26:47.160 --> 0:26:52.641
<v Speaker 1>of the hospital. Wow, I don't remember ever signing anything.

0:26:53.281 --> 0:26:57.160
<v Speaker 1>I remember lines there, people giving blood and I walked

0:26:57.201 --> 0:27:01.561
<v Speaker 1>about thirty five blocks up to Grant Central Station. In

0:27:01.600 --> 0:27:04.761
<v Speaker 1>between I used the phone. Back back in the day

0:27:04.761 --> 0:27:08.080
<v Speaker 1>they had the payphones. I was able to get on

0:27:08.120 --> 0:27:09.920
<v Speaker 1>the phone to my mother in law back home was

0:27:09.961 --> 0:27:13.041
<v Speaker 1>watching my son. She got touch with my wife who

0:27:13.080 --> 0:27:16.840
<v Speaker 1>worked in Midtown on the West Side, and I got

0:27:16.840 --> 0:27:19.761
<v Speaker 1>to meet her in Grand Central station, right under the

0:27:19.801 --> 0:27:23.561
<v Speaker 1>clock where do you ever see some of the Disney movies?

0:27:23.721 --> 0:27:27.920
<v Speaker 1>They always have that clocke in there Madagascar? Yeah, And

0:27:28.001 --> 0:27:29.880
<v Speaker 1>I ended up going home on the train. I remember

0:27:29.880 --> 0:27:31.761
<v Speaker 1>people looking at me like I was a freak because

0:27:31.921 --> 0:27:35.241
<v Speaker 1>I still had all bandages. I had dirty, bloody scrubs on,

0:27:35.880 --> 0:27:39.680
<v Speaker 1>melted shoes and a shirt from a clothing bin that

0:27:39.761 --> 0:27:42.561
<v Speaker 1>was too small. It was white with gray pinstripes venues

0:27:42.600 --> 0:27:45.880
<v Speaker 1>and came halfway down my arms. I couldn't button the

0:27:45.921 --> 0:27:49.801
<v Speaker 1>top the bottom, and I looked like I probably was

0:27:49.840 --> 0:27:52.160
<v Speaker 1>a homeless guy again into a fight and lost.

0:27:52.241 --> 0:27:56.321
<v Speaker 4>But so what was actually when did they actually hate it?

0:27:56.400 --> 0:28:01.281
<v Speaker 1>So when it hit me when I got home and

0:28:01.321 --> 0:28:05.521
<v Speaker 1>I started watching the TV, and people started calling the

0:28:05.561 --> 0:28:09.761
<v Speaker 1>house because they're my name being you know, Thomas Cannavan.

0:28:10.360 --> 0:28:14.080
<v Speaker 1>There was a gentleman killed here named Sean Thomas Canavan.

0:28:14.921 --> 0:28:17.680
<v Speaker 1>So my parents listening to this, they live upstate, They

0:28:17.721 --> 0:28:19.561
<v Speaker 1>live on the other side of the river in Monticello,

0:28:19.600 --> 0:28:23.681
<v Speaker 1>New York, and they had seen what was happening. They

0:28:23.761 --> 0:28:26.360
<v Speaker 1>got in the car to come down to see because

0:28:26.400 --> 0:28:28.601
<v Speaker 1>they seen me on TV. But when they first heard

0:28:28.640 --> 0:28:32.721
<v Speaker 1>the names of people that were missing. They you sort

0:28:32.721 --> 0:28:34.720
<v Speaker 1>of block out the Sean, but then they hear the

0:28:34.721 --> 0:28:37.680
<v Speaker 1>Thomas Canavan part. So they tried to get to the city.

0:28:37.761 --> 0:28:40.721
<v Speaker 1>They weren't allowed. They would turn back. Nobody was allowed

0:28:40.801 --> 0:28:46.521
<v Speaker 1>in Manhattan. But that night watching TV and then people

0:28:46.561 --> 0:28:49.881
<v Speaker 1>that I work with calling the house saying, you know,

0:28:50.601 --> 0:28:53.281
<v Speaker 1>we saw you on TV. You know, we saw the interview.

0:28:53.321 --> 0:28:57.281
<v Speaker 1>Are you okay? And I was like, while I'm home,

0:28:57.561 --> 0:29:01.321
<v Speaker 1>you know, And still at that point, the adrenaline was

0:29:01.361 --> 0:29:04.841
<v Speaker 1>still like pumping. But I started watching the TV because

0:29:04.841 --> 0:29:07.641
<v Speaker 1>if I survived, some of the people in front of me,

0:29:07.881 --> 0:29:10.921
<v Speaker 1>maybe they're out, you know, maybe something happened. I'll see

0:29:10.961 --> 0:29:14.841
<v Speaker 1>them on TV. Maybe they survived too. We did lose

0:29:14.881 --> 0:29:17.481
<v Speaker 1>four Antonette being one of them. I don't believe they

0:29:17.521 --> 0:29:21.720
<v Speaker 1>ever found anything of three of them. The fourth person,

0:29:21.761 --> 0:29:23.841
<v Speaker 1>I think they found a little piece of her jaw

0:29:23.921 --> 0:29:33.041
<v Speaker 1>bone in their recovery. But uh, yeah, what was it?

0:29:33.121 --> 0:29:34.921
<v Speaker 3>What was it that you know, you know, when you

0:29:34.921 --> 0:29:36.761
<v Speaker 3>were trapped, Like I know that you said that you

0:29:36.801 --> 0:29:39.481
<v Speaker 3>wanted to get home for the birthday and all like that,

0:29:39.641 --> 0:29:43.561
<v Speaker 3>But did you ever feel that this is it, You're

0:29:43.561 --> 0:29:45.801
<v Speaker 3>not getting out or did did you always have confidence

0:29:45.801 --> 0:29:46.161
<v Speaker 3>you were going.

0:29:46.121 --> 0:29:46.921
<v Speaker 2>To get out.

0:29:47.241 --> 0:29:50.561
<v Speaker 1>No, it wasn't. I don't think the thought of I

0:29:50.601 --> 0:29:52.521
<v Speaker 1>know I'm getting out or I'm not getting out ever

0:29:52.681 --> 0:29:56.561
<v Speaker 1>came into my head. It was just keep going. One thing.

0:29:56.841 --> 0:29:58.240
<v Speaker 1>One of the other things you learned being in New

0:29:58.281 --> 0:30:00.921
<v Speaker 1>Yorker is unless you know, it's not the first guy

0:30:00.961 --> 0:30:04.921
<v Speaker 1>that's knocked down, it's the last guy that standing that

0:30:05.761 --> 0:30:10.081
<v Speaker 1>he's the winner. And you just I don't know if

0:30:10.081 --> 0:30:12.921
<v Speaker 1>it's ingrained at this point, but you just keep going.

0:30:13.001 --> 0:30:14.440
<v Speaker 1>You put your head down and you do what you

0:30:14.481 --> 0:30:19.401
<v Speaker 1>have to do. Rather than being an active thing, I

0:30:19.521 --> 0:30:21.961
<v Speaker 1>was more reactive because if I was going one way

0:30:21.961 --> 0:30:24.561
<v Speaker 1>and I couldn't go that way, I had to adjust.

0:30:25.361 --> 0:30:27.521
<v Speaker 1>Things falling, I had to adjust. So I was very

0:30:27.561 --> 0:30:31.161
<v Speaker 1>reactive to what was going on around me. And again

0:30:31.241 --> 0:30:34.200
<v Speaker 1>your mind goes blank, Well mind it anyway. It was

0:30:34.281 --> 0:30:37.641
<v Speaker 1>more just keep going, you know the direction you're going.

0:30:38.041 --> 0:30:39.681
<v Speaker 1>I didn't know I was going up at the time,

0:30:40.001 --> 0:30:41.961
<v Speaker 1>but when I was outside the building, I said, okay,

0:30:42.001 --> 0:30:46.441
<v Speaker 1>I'm outside the building. I didn't know what was going

0:30:46.481 --> 0:30:47.921
<v Speaker 1>on with the other building. You know, I didn't know

0:30:47.961 --> 0:30:49.480
<v Speaker 1>I'm going to get hit with a bunch of stuff.

0:30:49.521 --> 0:30:53.641
<v Speaker 1>I don't know what's going to happen. I don't think

0:30:54.521 --> 0:30:56.841
<v Speaker 1>you were when you go on instinct or whatever it is,

0:30:56.841 --> 0:31:00.081
<v Speaker 1>that you can plan for anything, because I mean, it

0:31:00.441 --> 0:31:03.720
<v Speaker 1>still doesn't register, like how does this happen? This is

0:31:03.721 --> 0:31:06.121
<v Speaker 1>two thousand and one and New York City, like this

0:31:06.201 --> 0:31:09.161
<v Speaker 1>is you know, this is happening here? Like how how

0:31:09.241 --> 0:31:13.561
<v Speaker 1>is this going on? You know, it was so out

0:31:13.601 --> 0:31:17.441
<v Speaker 1>of the ordinary where I fear today that something happens

0:31:17.481 --> 0:31:20.121
<v Speaker 1>like this, where a building gets hit, people are not

0:31:20.161 --> 0:31:22.200
<v Speaker 1>going to be orderly leaving. The first thing they're going

0:31:22.241 --> 0:31:24.200
<v Speaker 1>to think of is a collapse, and they're going to

0:31:24.281 --> 0:31:26.041
<v Speaker 1>be rushing and more people are going to get hurt

0:31:26.161 --> 0:31:30.561
<v Speaker 1>or killed or trampled. You know. But up until then,

0:31:30.721 --> 0:31:34.041
<v Speaker 1>it had never happened, so you know, you had nothing

0:31:34.081 --> 0:31:36.000
<v Speaker 1>to go by. The only thing I had to go

0:31:36.041 --> 0:31:40.161
<v Speaker 1>by was reading as a kid history that history is

0:31:40.201 --> 0:31:43.961
<v Speaker 1>told by survivors. Yeah, and okay, I'm out. So now

0:31:44.001 --> 0:31:46.801
<v Speaker 1>I can tell people, you know, what happened to me.

0:31:47.041 --> 0:31:51.881
<v Speaker 1>I can relate to people because you know, got all

0:31:51.881 --> 0:31:53.521
<v Speaker 1>the stuff out there on the internet. There's so many

0:31:53.561 --> 0:31:57.921
<v Speaker 1>of these conspiracy theories, you know, and listen, two planes

0:31:57.961 --> 0:32:00.281
<v Speaker 1>got hit by two you know, two buildings got hit

0:32:00.281 --> 0:32:03.321
<v Speaker 1>by two planes here and people were murdered here. That

0:32:03.441 --> 0:32:05.801
<v Speaker 1>that's to me, that's the very base thing, you know.

0:32:05.961 --> 0:32:08.480
<v Speaker 1>As far as everything else, there's stuff I don't know,

0:32:08.881 --> 0:32:10.681
<v Speaker 1>but there are things I know. I know what happened.

0:32:10.721 --> 0:32:13.881
<v Speaker 1>I mean, you know, I'm here me on the internet,

0:32:13.881 --> 0:32:16.081
<v Speaker 1>I have people saying it's fake, it's a I you

0:32:16.081 --> 0:32:18.761
<v Speaker 1>know there. I don't believe there was AI in two

0:32:18.801 --> 0:32:22.521
<v Speaker 1>thousand and one. First off, you know that people could

0:32:22.561 --> 0:32:25.281
<v Speaker 1>do that. I've learned to live with that. You know,

0:32:25.841 --> 0:32:30.401
<v Speaker 1>the conspiracy theory people whatever, you know, I can't change

0:32:30.401 --> 0:32:30.881
<v Speaker 1>their minds.

0:32:31.601 --> 0:32:33.440
<v Speaker 3>You know what you know when you you you finally

0:32:33.481 --> 0:32:35.801
<v Speaker 3>got out and you say, because you were so far

0:32:35.921 --> 0:32:38.481
<v Speaker 3>down in the building, what was the what was the

0:32:38.521 --> 0:32:41.361
<v Speaker 3>noise actually like when you were on street level?

0:32:41.601 --> 0:32:44.401
<v Speaker 2>Was it like intense? Was it like just screaming? Was

0:32:44.441 --> 0:32:46.641
<v Speaker 2>it not like nothing?

0:32:46.721 --> 0:32:50.521
<v Speaker 1>It was if you've ever been in a snowstorm, in

0:32:50.601 --> 0:32:53.641
<v Speaker 1>a blizzard, like when it snows in New York, it's

0:32:53.721 --> 0:32:56.440
<v Speaker 1>very quiet. Everything is muffled. There's a lot of a

0:32:56.441 --> 0:32:59.561
<v Speaker 1>lot of cars in the street. When I got out

0:32:59.601 --> 0:33:02.921
<v Speaker 1>of the buildings, everything was white from all the ash.

0:33:03.121 --> 0:33:04.960
<v Speaker 1>It looks like it had snowed, but the sun was

0:33:05.081 --> 0:33:08.321
<v Speaker 1>out as I'm walking up the street. I think it

0:33:08.401 --> 0:33:11.521
<v Speaker 1>was so soon after the collapse that there was nobody

0:33:11.601 --> 0:33:13.521
<v Speaker 1>yelling in the street. There was no not that I

0:33:13.601 --> 0:33:18.601
<v Speaker 1>recall anyway. The first thing that I recall hearing after

0:33:18.921 --> 0:33:23.241
<v Speaker 1>my buildings started coming down was the doors of ambulances

0:33:23.281 --> 0:33:26.481
<v Speaker 1>slamming shut and taking the ambulance taking off as people

0:33:26.481 --> 0:33:29.081
<v Speaker 1>were trying to get out of you know, they were

0:33:29.081 --> 0:33:31.561
<v Speaker 1>picking up people from the first collapse. Now there's a

0:33:31.601 --> 0:33:34.881
<v Speaker 1>second collapse, and there were people trying to get out

0:33:34.881 --> 0:33:38.401
<v Speaker 1>of there. I don't remember anyone screaming. I don't none

0:33:38.441 --> 0:33:42.041
<v Speaker 1>of that at all. Some of the videos that I'm in,

0:33:43.281 --> 0:33:45.321
<v Speaker 1>you know, there is sound and as I'm walking up

0:33:45.321 --> 0:33:47.761
<v Speaker 1>the street, you really don't hear anything. You know, I

0:33:47.801 --> 0:33:50.601
<v Speaker 1>have a firefighter telling the guy their ambulance is up

0:33:50.761 --> 0:33:54.041
<v Speaker 1>up further or you know, I remember cursing someone's going

0:33:54.081 --> 0:33:56.641
<v Speaker 1>to pay for this, and you know, blah blah blah,

0:33:57.041 --> 0:34:02.321
<v Speaker 1>not really proper non cussing words, but you know, and

0:34:02.401 --> 0:34:05.200
<v Speaker 1>giving an ur rah and my thumbs up again and

0:34:05.241 --> 0:34:07.881
<v Speaker 1>not knowing you know what I look like. I mean,

0:34:07.921 --> 0:34:11.041
<v Speaker 1>you've seen the pictures, so they're not pretty, but.

0:34:12.201 --> 0:34:13.401
<v Speaker 2>How did you deal with the trauma?

0:34:13.481 --> 0:34:19.241
<v Speaker 1>After you sleep for about three hours. For about the

0:34:19.281 --> 0:34:23.401
<v Speaker 1>first ten years, three or four hours, you deal with

0:34:23.441 --> 0:34:26.201
<v Speaker 1>the trauma much. I've come to deal with it much

0:34:26.321 --> 0:34:29.681
<v Speaker 1>like getting old, which is it sucks to get old,

0:34:30.361 --> 0:34:33.201
<v Speaker 1>but it's better than the alternative of not getting old.

0:34:34.721 --> 0:34:38.241
<v Speaker 1>You have to adapt to things. You have to. You know.

0:34:38.561 --> 0:34:42.961
<v Speaker 1>One of the biggest things between survivor groups is you

0:34:43.081 --> 0:34:45.361
<v Speaker 1>get it. We call it. You get it. You understand

0:34:45.401 --> 0:34:49.681
<v Speaker 1>what it's like. You don't. You can't convince people who

0:34:49.801 --> 0:34:52.921
<v Speaker 1>think they know what it's like. Same thing with military guys.

0:34:53.841 --> 0:34:58.121
<v Speaker 1>They can communicate on a different level than regular people.

0:34:58.441 --> 0:35:02.321
<v Speaker 1>Things they've seen, things they've done. You can't make people

0:35:02.401 --> 0:35:07.761
<v Speaker 1>understand it if they weren't there. And the other thing

0:35:07.841 --> 0:35:10.921
<v Speaker 1>is people say we'll get over it. You don't. You

0:35:10.961 --> 0:35:13.441
<v Speaker 1>don't really get over it. You learn to deal with

0:35:13.481 --> 0:35:15.921
<v Speaker 1>it and you and you move on again. It's putting

0:35:15.921 --> 0:35:18.601
<v Speaker 1>your head down. I don't know, being a New Yorker

0:35:18.641 --> 0:35:21.281
<v Speaker 1>from just too stupid or too stubborn to give up.

0:35:22.241 --> 0:35:24.321
<v Speaker 1>But you just put your head down and keep going.

0:35:24.481 --> 0:35:28.321
<v Speaker 1>Because when you don't do that, then then there's trouble.

0:35:29.641 --> 0:35:32.001
<v Speaker 1>You have to face it. To me, you had. I

0:35:32.121 --> 0:35:36.081
<v Speaker 1>faced it head on. I threw myself into talking, joining

0:35:36.121 --> 0:35:39.041
<v Speaker 1>a survivor group called Strength to Strength, and it we

0:35:39.161 --> 0:35:41.681
<v Speaker 1>deal with terrorism around the world. We have survivors from

0:35:41.721 --> 0:35:45.121
<v Speaker 1>all over the world, Boston Marathon in Oklahoma City and

0:35:45.321 --> 0:35:50.481
<v Speaker 1>Brussels and UH seven seven in in London, and we

0:35:50.481 --> 0:35:54.401
<v Speaker 1>we can relate people who need help more than I do.

0:35:54.521 --> 0:35:56.281
<v Speaker 1>I think I can handle it a lot better than

0:35:56.321 --> 0:35:59.161
<v Speaker 1>a lot of people did. I don't know why. Maybe

0:35:59.201 --> 0:36:02.321
<v Speaker 1>it's my upbringing of where I was again, the environment

0:36:02.401 --> 0:36:06.161
<v Speaker 1>I was I was raised in. But they like to

0:36:06.201 --> 0:36:09.561
<v Speaker 1>hear someone tell them, you know what, I went through

0:36:09.561 --> 0:36:12.361
<v Speaker 1>this too, and look at me. And the best thing

0:36:12.401 --> 0:36:15.121
<v Speaker 1>you can do is you're gonna get through it, and

0:36:15.121 --> 0:36:17.441
<v Speaker 1>you're gonna turn it around and you're gonna help someone else.

0:36:17.481 --> 0:36:19.961
<v Speaker 1>Because it's the way the world is right now. You know,

0:36:20.001 --> 0:36:22.921
<v Speaker 1>every couple of weeks, something else happens and it's just

0:36:22.961 --> 0:36:25.281
<v Speaker 1>not the trauma of terrorism. It's you know, it could

0:36:25.281 --> 0:36:29.521
<v Speaker 1>be other you know, school shootings or mess shootings or

0:36:29.921 --> 0:36:33.361
<v Speaker 1>anything like that that you know, people get affected. Everyone

0:36:33.441 --> 0:36:36.480
<v Speaker 1>is different and everybody has a different way to deal

0:36:36.521 --> 0:36:40.521
<v Speaker 1>with it, and you find your way. But when you

0:36:40.561 --> 0:36:43.481
<v Speaker 1>can relate to other people. It becomes a little I

0:36:43.521 --> 0:36:46.000
<v Speaker 1>don't want to say easier, but it becomes a little like, Okay,

0:36:46.041 --> 0:36:47.721
<v Speaker 1>there is a light at the end of that tunnel.

0:36:48.081 --> 0:36:50.041
<v Speaker 1>If this person can do it, I can do it.

0:36:51.321 --> 0:36:51.561
<v Speaker 2>Wow.

0:36:53.201 --> 0:36:55.001
<v Speaker 4>How long did it take you to go back to

0:36:55.001 --> 0:36:57.401
<v Speaker 4>a building, like to step inside a building again.

0:36:59.121 --> 0:37:01.761
<v Speaker 1>I came back down to ground zero three days later

0:37:02.641 --> 0:37:05.480
<v Speaker 1>because in my mind, I said, if if I don't

0:37:05.521 --> 0:37:07.561
<v Speaker 1>go back now, I may never want to go back again.

0:37:08.241 --> 0:37:10.281
<v Speaker 1>That's that's just me being That's just me being in

0:37:10.321 --> 0:37:13.401
<v Speaker 1>New Yorker. That's like, no, this is my city. You're

0:37:13.521 --> 0:37:16.321
<v Speaker 1>not taking this away from me. I love I love

0:37:16.401 --> 0:37:20.201
<v Speaker 1>this place. Plus I couldn't really get in. I mean,

0:37:20.241 --> 0:37:21.921
<v Speaker 1>I was all had the bandage on my head and

0:37:21.961 --> 0:37:24.681
<v Speaker 1>everything else, and I was pretty you know, two black eyes.

0:37:24.761 --> 0:37:27.401
<v Speaker 1>I was pretty beat up. But it was like, no,

0:37:27.521 --> 0:37:31.521
<v Speaker 1>I need to go there because people I've lost people.

0:37:32.201 --> 0:37:35.881
<v Speaker 1>I don't like the thought of leaving anybody behind, being

0:37:36.081 --> 0:37:40.721
<v Speaker 1>alive or dead missing. To me, the family is like

0:37:40.841 --> 0:37:44.321
<v Speaker 1>torn you want you can never give up that hope

0:37:45.041 --> 0:37:48.721
<v Speaker 1>if they're missing. But if if you do have something

0:37:48.761 --> 0:37:53.521
<v Speaker 1>definitive with closure, there there is a way that you

0:37:53.561 --> 0:37:57.481
<v Speaker 1>can deal with it better than never not knowing what

0:37:57.641 --> 0:38:00.641
<v Speaker 1>actually happened. You, you know, that nagging thing in the

0:38:00.681 --> 0:38:03.440
<v Speaker 1>back of your mind. May be they're somewhere, Maybe they

0:38:03.441 --> 0:38:05.641
<v Speaker 1>were knocked out and brought over to Jerry. Maybe they

0:38:05.681 --> 0:38:08.761
<v Speaker 1>have amnesia. So to me, it was I need to

0:38:08.761 --> 0:38:12.480
<v Speaker 1>come here. I need to see for myself what's still here.

0:38:13.321 --> 0:38:15.641
<v Speaker 2>How did the field say in the building's not there anymore?

0:38:15.681 --> 0:38:16.641
<v Speaker 2>How did that feel.

0:38:18.281 --> 0:38:24.401
<v Speaker 1>It? It was kind of looking at it and saying, wow,

0:38:24.441 --> 0:38:27.961
<v Speaker 1>it's a lot smaller than I thought, Like the buildings

0:38:27.961 --> 0:38:31.121
<v Speaker 1>were closer than I thought they were. There was so

0:38:31.201 --> 0:38:34.960
<v Speaker 1>much going on construction and you know, hoses to keep

0:38:34.961 --> 0:38:39.121
<v Speaker 1>the dust down from everything, and they were removing things.

0:38:39.801 --> 0:38:42.241
<v Speaker 1>The smell in the air, you know, they had to say.

0:38:42.881 --> 0:38:45.921
<v Speaker 1>They were told tell everybody it's okay. We knew it

0:38:45.921 --> 0:38:50.601
<v Speaker 1>wasn't okay. If you ever touch old coins, you get

0:38:50.641 --> 0:38:54.281
<v Speaker 1>that that smell and that that taste on your hand,

0:38:54.361 --> 0:38:58.441
<v Speaker 1>like a coppery which is like a blood smell. It

0:38:58.601 --> 0:39:02.241
<v Speaker 1>was all over down here. You couldn't get away from

0:39:02.281 --> 0:39:05.001
<v Speaker 1>the smoke. You couldn't get away. But I needed to

0:39:05.121 --> 0:39:07.881
<v Speaker 1>come back here. Yeah, to me, it was part of

0:39:08.601 --> 0:39:11.041
<v Speaker 1>I need to see it. I need to know what

0:39:11.321 --> 0:39:14.961
<v Speaker 1>really happened because again your brain, you know, like how

0:39:15.001 --> 0:39:17.801
<v Speaker 1>do you imagine two buildings collapsing in planes hitting and

0:39:17.841 --> 0:39:21.281
<v Speaker 1>then a third building burning out completely and collapsing, and

0:39:21.321 --> 0:39:24.321
<v Speaker 1>that was fifty four stories building seven, Like that would

0:39:24.361 --> 0:39:26.881
<v Speaker 1>have been the biggest news on a day if it

0:39:26.921 --> 0:39:29.761
<v Speaker 1>wasn't for you know, two one hundred and ten story buildings,

0:39:30.121 --> 0:39:33.921
<v Speaker 1>and then seeing the hotel basically cut in half, and

0:39:34.161 --> 0:39:37.161
<v Speaker 1>like marveling, like I don't know to this day, like

0:39:37.201 --> 0:39:38.721
<v Speaker 1>how did I get out of here? You know what

0:39:38.801 --> 0:39:41.921
<v Speaker 1>I mean, Like it's I don't know how what why?

0:39:43.001 --> 0:39:45.441
<v Speaker 1>You know? Everyone tells me, oh, you're here for a reason.

0:39:45.481 --> 0:39:47.440
<v Speaker 1>I always say, don't. I don't need that pressure. Don't

0:39:47.441 --> 0:39:49.761
<v Speaker 1>put that pressure on me, you know. But I got

0:39:49.761 --> 0:39:51.521
<v Speaker 1>to see my daughter be born. I got to see

0:39:51.561 --> 0:39:56.440
<v Speaker 1>my son's third birthday plan. You know. I was very

0:39:56.481 --> 0:39:58.441
<v Speaker 1>lucky that that's the only way I could look at it.

0:39:59.041 --> 0:40:01.241
<v Speaker 1>People make a left instead of a right. You know,

0:40:01.561 --> 0:40:04.801
<v Speaker 1>two seconds later I'm not where I'm where I am.

0:40:05.121 --> 0:40:08.361
<v Speaker 1>Second later that thing crushes me. Two seconds later, I'm

0:40:08.401 --> 0:40:11.121
<v Speaker 1>behind me. Maybe I don't I never get out, So

0:40:11.441 --> 0:40:13.721
<v Speaker 1>I mean, it's it's always a double edged sword. Survivor's

0:40:13.721 --> 0:40:17.921
<v Speaker 1>guilt but you have to just go on. I mean again,

0:40:18.001 --> 0:40:20.401
<v Speaker 1>the alternative is what. I'm not going to jump off

0:40:20.401 --> 0:40:24.081
<v Speaker 1>a bridge. I'm not to me. You know, people with

0:40:24.201 --> 0:40:28.481
<v Speaker 1>mental problems that think of suicide, I've never thought of that.

0:40:28.481 --> 0:40:32.081
<v Speaker 1>That to me, that from personally, that's my coward's way out,

0:40:32.161 --> 0:40:34.081
<v Speaker 1>Like why would I do that to my family? A

0:40:34.161 --> 0:40:37.361
<v Speaker 1>stigmatism for my kids, like growing up all your farmer killed,

0:40:37.521 --> 0:40:39.921
<v Speaker 1>Like I would never do that to other people in

0:40:40.001 --> 0:40:44.041
<v Speaker 1>my family. I just couldn't, you know. And then to

0:40:44.041 --> 0:40:46.081
<v Speaker 1>this day, my biggest fear is I slip and I

0:40:46.121 --> 0:40:48.361
<v Speaker 1>bang my head on the toilet and I die. And

0:40:48.361 --> 0:40:49.881
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, I got out of nine to eleven and

0:40:49.881 --> 0:40:52.441
<v Speaker 1>here I am, say, find me my pants down on

0:40:52.481 --> 0:40:56.401
<v Speaker 1>a bandom floor. You know, like the indignity of that,

0:40:56.521 --> 0:40:59.281
<v Speaker 1>you know. So that's that's the kind of thoughts that

0:40:59.361 --> 0:41:00.641
<v Speaker 1>run through your mind at this point.

0:41:00.761 --> 0:41:03.041
<v Speaker 4>You know, how long did how long did it take

0:41:03.081 --> 0:41:07.521
<v Speaker 4>you to go into a like into a a building again,

0:41:07.881 --> 0:41:08.281
<v Speaker 4>like did.

0:41:08.281 --> 0:41:10.441
<v Speaker 2>You wake in a building like a store?

0:41:10.521 --> 0:41:14.361
<v Speaker 1>Resident? Yeah? I went In fact, working for the moving

0:41:14.401 --> 0:41:17.561
<v Speaker 1>company that I was, I worked right across the street.

0:41:18.081 --> 0:41:20.161
<v Speaker 1>The buildings or the floors were propped up by two

0:41:20.161 --> 0:41:23.561
<v Speaker 1>by fours. There was no electricity in it. There were

0:41:23.601 --> 0:41:26.201
<v Speaker 1>body parts in it, but we were contracted to go

0:41:26.241 --> 0:41:28.961
<v Speaker 1>in and remove people's laptops, so we had to go

0:41:29.001 --> 0:41:32.081
<v Speaker 1>through the building taking laptops off desks because everybody thought

0:41:32.121 --> 0:41:34.241
<v Speaker 1>they'd be back to work the next day, you know.

0:41:36.561 --> 0:41:38.761
<v Speaker 1>So I got to see the side. I got to

0:41:38.801 --> 0:41:42.641
<v Speaker 1>see what was here and smell it, and to this day,

0:41:42.681 --> 0:41:45.401
<v Speaker 1>I have no fear of buildings. I fly all the

0:41:45.441 --> 0:41:48.881
<v Speaker 1>time with the group I'm a part of, you know.

0:41:48.921 --> 0:41:51.841
<v Speaker 1>I've been to Manchester for their memorial service. I've been

0:41:51.841 --> 0:41:56.401
<v Speaker 1>to London. I've been to you know, Oklahoma City for

0:41:56.441 --> 0:41:58.681
<v Speaker 1>the past twenty five years. Almost we go every year.

0:41:58.841 --> 0:42:02.361
<v Speaker 1>So this wasn't my time. That's the only thing, the

0:42:02.401 --> 0:42:05.161
<v Speaker 1>only way I could deal with it like that, I think,

0:42:06.121 --> 0:42:08.081
<v Speaker 1>I don't want to say it made me stronger here,

0:42:08.201 --> 0:42:11.961
<v Speaker 1>but it made me think about things other than worrying

0:42:12.001 --> 0:42:15.001
<v Speaker 1>about dying. Like I don't wear a wristwatch. My watch

0:42:15.001 --> 0:42:18.361
<v Speaker 1>hangs in the museum. It stopped a couple of minutes

0:42:18.441 --> 0:42:20.401
<v Speaker 1>after the plane hit. I must have banged it somewhere

0:42:20.601 --> 0:42:23.961
<v Speaker 1>and it was covered in blood, you know, and concrete powder,

0:42:24.921 --> 0:42:28.081
<v Speaker 1>and it's for years. The second hand would take the

0:42:28.121 --> 0:42:30.521
<v Speaker 1>twelve and then go back and then finally, you know,

0:42:30.561 --> 0:42:33.081
<v Speaker 1>the battery died and it hangs in the museum. I

0:42:33.121 --> 0:42:35.961
<v Speaker 1>have not worn a wristwatch since that day. You know,

0:42:36.001 --> 0:42:38.241
<v Speaker 1>if I need time, I got it on my phone.

0:42:38.281 --> 0:42:40.081
<v Speaker 1>But it's sort of like, why am I in a

0:42:40.161 --> 0:42:42.601
<v Speaker 1>rush to do anything anymore? Like this is to me,

0:42:42.721 --> 0:42:45.681
<v Speaker 1>this is gravy. This is the cherry on the Sunday

0:42:45.681 --> 0:42:48.081
<v Speaker 1>for me, I'm like, I'm here. You know what am

0:42:48.081 --> 0:42:51.121
<v Speaker 1>I going to ask for? I've hit the lottery? You know,

0:42:51.281 --> 0:42:54.841
<v Speaker 1>one in a million. I went to work like a

0:42:54.881 --> 0:42:57.521
<v Speaker 1>billion people do across this planet. Every day. They get

0:42:57.601 --> 0:43:00.521
<v Speaker 1>up and go to work. By the end of the day,

0:43:00.561 --> 0:43:03.681
<v Speaker 1>I'm one of nineteen people on the planet that experienced something.

0:43:03.761 --> 0:43:05.641
<v Speaker 1>They were only nineteen of us that so by being

0:43:05.681 --> 0:43:08.241
<v Speaker 1>buried under it, like, how do you go from being

0:43:08.241 --> 0:43:10.321
<v Speaker 1>one in a billion to one of nineteen in the

0:43:10.361 --> 0:43:13.521
<v Speaker 1>history of the world. You know, it's kind of overwhelming

0:43:13.561 --> 0:43:16.721
<v Speaker 1>if you think about it that way. But again, you

0:43:16.801 --> 0:43:18.561
<v Speaker 1>just put your head down, you go on. You try

0:43:18.561 --> 0:43:22.281
<v Speaker 1>to help people that need help. That's the only thing

0:43:22.321 --> 0:43:22.961
<v Speaker 1>I can think of.

0:43:23.121 --> 0:43:25.520
<v Speaker 2>You know, do you still have nightmares? Do you still

0:43:25.561 --> 0:43:26.921
<v Speaker 2>have flashbacks?

0:43:27.401 --> 0:43:29.601
<v Speaker 1>It was never a nightmare. It was sort of like

0:43:29.681 --> 0:43:33.321
<v Speaker 1>a movie that plays over in your head, Okay, every night,

0:43:34.361 --> 0:43:37.960
<v Speaker 1>over and over, and the question comes up, why didn't

0:43:38.001 --> 0:43:40.001
<v Speaker 1>you leave right away? You should have known better. Why

0:43:40.001 --> 0:43:42.241
<v Speaker 1>didn't you go in that first stairway. Why didn't you?

0:43:42.281 --> 0:43:44.161
<v Speaker 1>Why didn't you do this? Why did you do this?

0:43:44.241 --> 0:43:47.281
<v Speaker 1>Why didn't you? So that's what I went through for

0:43:47.361 --> 0:43:50.321
<v Speaker 1>years and years. There's not a day that doesn't go

0:43:50.361 --> 0:43:53.601
<v Speaker 1>by that I don't think of this place. Because right

0:43:53.601 --> 0:43:56.401
<v Speaker 1>now i'm actually doing this interview. I'm on the plaza

0:43:57.001 --> 0:43:59.481
<v Speaker 1>right next to the pool where my building stood. Okay,

0:44:01.201 --> 0:44:03.721
<v Speaker 1>there's not a day that goes by because I'm going

0:44:03.801 --> 0:44:06.121
<v Speaker 1>to see a plane flying about my head every day.

0:44:06.641 --> 0:44:08.681
<v Speaker 1>So when I know they're low, I'll put my head

0:44:08.721 --> 0:44:10.081
<v Speaker 1>down and I'll say, I'm not gonna look. I'm not

0:44:10.121 --> 0:44:11.601
<v Speaker 1>gonna look. I'm not gonna look. And then I find

0:44:11.601 --> 0:44:15.361
<v Speaker 1>myself looking at it and I'm like, damn. There are

0:44:15.401 --> 0:44:18.441
<v Speaker 1>certain noises there. If I walk by a construction site,

0:44:19.161 --> 0:44:23.841
<v Speaker 1>you get that concrete powder smell. It'll it'll jaw you back.

0:44:23.881 --> 0:44:26.480
<v Speaker 1>There are certain songs that I remember hearing the days

0:44:26.521 --> 0:44:29.161
<v Speaker 1>after nine to eleven that when I hear that song

0:44:30.001 --> 0:44:34.041
<v Speaker 1>it becomes very like, oh, it brings me back to

0:44:34.401 --> 0:44:37.641
<v Speaker 1>you know, where I was, what I was doing there.

0:44:37.881 --> 0:44:40.641
<v Speaker 1>There is the one thing that I've seen that the

0:44:40.681 --> 0:44:44.281
<v Speaker 1>only thing that makes me tear up really is in

0:44:44.321 --> 0:44:47.361
<v Speaker 1>the super Bowl in February of two thousand and two.

0:44:47.881 --> 0:44:50.281
<v Speaker 1>But wise I had a commercial. They've only played it

0:44:50.361 --> 0:44:54.841
<v Speaker 1>once and it's the horses. They come to New York

0:44:55.441 --> 0:44:58.401
<v Speaker 1>and they bring the wagon and they stop over in

0:44:58.481 --> 0:45:03.121
<v Speaker 1>Jersey City and you see the skyline. There's no there's

0:45:03.161 --> 0:45:06.681
<v Speaker 1>no towers there and the whole is bow and even

0:45:06.721 --> 0:45:09.281
<v Speaker 1>now as I think about it, I'm like, but I'm

0:45:09.281 --> 0:45:12.081
<v Speaker 1>not going to lose it here. But that's the only

0:45:12.121 --> 0:45:14.480
<v Speaker 1>thing that Mike gets to me, you know, get chokes

0:45:14.521 --> 0:45:18.281
<v Speaker 1>me up a little seeing those forces. But I don't know,

0:45:18.321 --> 0:45:19.841
<v Speaker 1>it's a weird thing. I guess, I don't know.

0:45:21.001 --> 0:45:22.281
<v Speaker 2>How's how's your health now?

0:45:23.881 --> 0:45:27.121
<v Speaker 1>Well? I picked up a cancer about two years ago

0:45:27.921 --> 0:45:32.161
<v Speaker 1>that's related to here. It's a skin cancer. It's treatable,

0:45:32.161 --> 0:45:34.681
<v Speaker 1>but it's not curable. So when I need to get

0:45:34.721 --> 0:45:38.121
<v Speaker 1>something done, they cut, they get the melon baller out

0:45:38.121 --> 0:45:40.121
<v Speaker 1>and they'll take out what they need to do. My

0:45:40.321 --> 0:45:43.401
<v Speaker 1>lungs probably about eighty percent, which is good. But you know,

0:45:43.641 --> 0:45:45.681
<v Speaker 1>I am getting older, so you know, I'll be sixty

0:45:45.721 --> 0:45:49.361
<v Speaker 1>six in March, so it's like, maybe that's the natural progression,

0:45:49.761 --> 0:45:53.281
<v Speaker 1>but otherwise I'm gonna go on doing what I'm doing.

0:45:54.241 --> 0:45:57.801
<v Speaker 1>Retired four years from I retired from the nine eleven

0:45:57.841 --> 0:46:02.001
<v Speaker 1>memorial itself. Well, I had the privilege to work and

0:46:02.121 --> 0:46:04.201
<v Speaker 1>take care of the pools, take care of the grounds.

0:46:05.841 --> 0:46:07.601
<v Speaker 1>When people come here and they see the pictures, I

0:46:07.641 --> 0:46:09.961
<v Speaker 1>always tell them, do you notice something about the pictures

0:46:09.961 --> 0:46:12.721
<v Speaker 1>of the people? And some people get it. They're smiling.

0:46:13.361 --> 0:46:15.681
<v Speaker 1>So I tell people come through the museum, you could

0:46:15.681 --> 0:46:19.841
<v Speaker 1>cry all you want, because we have tissues, plenty of tissues.

0:46:19.881 --> 0:46:22.281
<v Speaker 1>You can wipe your face. But when you get out

0:46:22.281 --> 0:46:24.721
<v Speaker 1>of here and you go on that street, you smile,

0:46:24.881 --> 0:46:27.041
<v Speaker 1>You take a deep breath, and you live your life.

0:46:28.081 --> 0:46:33.520
<v Speaker 1>And when people see, like everyone knows how everyone died here,

0:46:33.681 --> 0:46:35.601
<v Speaker 1>You see it on the video, you see it on TV.

0:46:36.201 --> 0:46:38.321
<v Speaker 1>What you don't know till you come here is we

0:46:38.481 --> 0:46:42.161
<v Speaker 1>showed you how people live their lives on those pictures.

0:46:42.601 --> 0:46:47.001
<v Speaker 1>And it's much more important to be remembered how you

0:46:47.081 --> 0:46:50.681
<v Speaker 1>lived than how you died. Go let people take your picture,

0:46:50.801 --> 0:46:53.481
<v Speaker 1>because when you're gone, you want someone to open up

0:46:53.481 --> 0:46:55.801
<v Speaker 1>a photo album and they see you dancing at your

0:46:55.961 --> 0:46:59.321
<v Speaker 1>kid's wedding, or holding your child, or running a marathon,

0:46:59.441 --> 0:47:02.960
<v Speaker 1>playing soccer, and they're gonna smile. It's not your name

0:47:03.041 --> 0:47:05.561
<v Speaker 1>on a stone or a piece of wood, a picture

0:47:05.601 --> 0:47:10.001
<v Speaker 1>of you living your life, not being buried under a stone.

0:47:10.361 --> 0:47:12.281
<v Speaker 1>Much much more important to be remembered that way.

0:47:13.321 --> 0:47:13.961
<v Speaker 2>That's correct.

0:47:14.361 --> 0:47:15.961
<v Speaker 3>Well, I just want to I just want to say

0:47:16.401 --> 0:47:19.761
<v Speaker 3>I'm so privileged to have you come on my podcast

0:47:20.241 --> 0:47:23.721
<v Speaker 3>and talk and share your story with me, because, as

0:47:23.761 --> 0:47:27.201
<v Speaker 3>I said, when I seen the article, and I've seen

0:47:27.201 --> 0:47:30.441
<v Speaker 3>a few articles when I researched you, I wanted you

0:47:30.481 --> 0:47:33.321
<v Speaker 3>on the podcast to share this story with Australia, with

0:47:33.441 --> 0:47:35.201
<v Speaker 3>all my listeners, and I'm grateful for that.

0:47:35.321 --> 0:47:38.521
<v Speaker 1>Tom Well, thank you, and a big shout out to

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<v Speaker 1>Christie who did all the legwork for this.

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<v Speaker 2>Thank you for Christy.

0:47:43.401 --> 0:47:48.481
<v Speaker 1>I'm a dinosaur when it comes to all this technology stuff. Like,

0:47:48.521 --> 0:47:50.561
<v Speaker 1>to me, a phone is still someone to talk to

0:47:50.601 --> 0:47:53.121
<v Speaker 1>someone on. You know, I don't have the thumbs of

0:47:53.121 --> 0:47:57.241
<v Speaker 1>a twelve year old to communicate all the time. Christie's

0:47:57.241 --> 0:48:01.441
<v Speaker 1>the best. She's gonna help me actually write a book.

0:48:02.841 --> 0:48:05.241
<v Speaker 1>It's been a you know, it's been a while. I

0:48:05.321 --> 0:48:09.281
<v Speaker 1>made a lot of friends, and hopefully there is you know,

0:48:09.321 --> 0:48:11.881
<v Speaker 1>a movie in the works, which was supposed to be

0:48:11.921 --> 0:48:14.881
<v Speaker 1>out by the twentieth, but COVID shut everything down, hopefully

0:48:14.881 --> 0:48:18.041
<v Speaker 1>by the twenty fifth, but I still hear that it's

0:48:18.081 --> 0:48:23.161
<v Speaker 1>still too recent, you know, twenty five years I think

0:48:23.961 --> 0:48:26.681
<v Speaker 1>is a good amount of time. Yeah, people need to

0:48:26.721 --> 0:48:30.601
<v Speaker 1>know the story because it's estimated one third of the

0:48:30.641 --> 0:48:33.761
<v Speaker 1>world wasn't even alive at this time, like twenty three

0:48:33.801 --> 0:48:37.241
<v Speaker 1>years ago, you know, and even not just survivors, but

0:48:37.281 --> 0:48:40.121
<v Speaker 1>family members who come here every year for the event.

0:48:40.561 --> 0:48:43.041
<v Speaker 1>There's less and less because you know, people pass away,

0:48:43.121 --> 0:48:46.321
<v Speaker 1>people move. The twenty fifth will be the next big one.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm gratefully you came on. I had to share your story.

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<v Speaker 3>Tom and I will keep in touch. That's one hundred

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<v Speaker 3>percent