Speaker 1: We were just talking for a month before he asked
Speaker 1: me to be his girlfriend in June. Yeah, same, like
Speaker 1: quick or you'll lose me.
Speaker 2: Byde Right now, we are in America, so as we
Speaker 2: spoke last week, this episode is just going to be
Speaker 2: a continuation of our dilemmas.
Speaker 1: You we would have just finished coach Ola, so we
Speaker 1: would have been like, we're dying.
Speaker 3: We are in very rustling dying.
Speaker 2: So hopefully we can give you guys something to make
Speaker 2: you feel a little bit better than we do.
Speaker 1: Yeah, both go straight into cool question of the week
Speaker 1: is he what is the worst piece of advice you followed.
Speaker 2: That my exes were worth pursuing. Honestly, I don't regret it.
Speaker 2: I just think it's take me a long time to
Speaker 2: get back to a place where I feel like myself.
Speaker 3: You know, yeah, I have a few. Actually, to be fair,
Speaker 3: I don't really think anyone told me to pursue that.
Speaker 2: I think I did that all on my own.
Speaker 1: A psychic once told me, oh, to not go no contact.
Speaker 3: Oh why would they ever say that?
Speaker 1: And I'm like, oh, fair boog back a message in
Speaker 1: whenever I want a psychic.
Speaker 3: That's fair. That's And then you're thinking the psychic told
Speaker 3: me something.
Speaker 1: Yeah, its just that Wad hates Ti mich Oh, I
Speaker 1: shouldn't replied, and I'm oh, well, the psychic told me
Speaker 1: not to like funny.
Speaker 2: Side note, not funny. Actually, I saw a psychic on Sunday.
Speaker 2: I've been seeing a lot of psychics.
Speaker 1: I was gonna say, I just think they're interesting.
Speaker 2: And she mentioned that La was going to fall and
Speaker 2: that she assumed it would be the fires, but obviously
Speaker 2: it wasn't. And then it's going to be an earthquake.
Speaker 1: How'd you say that?
Speaker 3: Well, why would I say that?
Speaker 1: Hate earthquakes?
Speaker 2: Yeah, so do I and that I will be fine,
Speaker 2: like I will live. But she doesn't know when it's
Speaker 2: going to happen, just that it will happen this year.
Speaker 2: So obviously we're only there for a month and three weeks.
Speaker 2: So it's like, you know, let's just hope that it's
Speaker 2: not all way there if it happens at all.
Speaker 1: All right, we're going straight into your dilemmas. We're wasting
Speaker 1: no time around here, so get away, girl, buckle up
Speaker 1: for this dilemma. Apparently, she's saying, So, I've been dating
Speaker 1: this guy, let's call him Jack, since May twenty twenty three,
Speaker 1: so coming up on two years. But we were just
Speaker 1: talking for a month before he asked me to be
Speaker 1: his girlfriend in June pattern I rate that yeah, same,
Speaker 1: I like, or you'll lose me yeah, one hundred literally.
Speaker 1: The next month I drove to Port Stevens, Newcastle with
Speaker 1: him that's where he's from, his family and friends. Stayed
Speaker 1: for a week and then drove back home to the
Speaker 1: Gold Coast. In January twenty twenty four, so eight months
Speaker 1: into our relationship, Jack somehow convinced me to move to
Speaker 1: Newcastle as he wants to save some money for twelve
Speaker 1: months then go back to the Gold Coast. It took
Speaker 1: a lot of convincing as I went in June. It
Speaker 1: was nice for a week, but I could never see
Speaker 1: myself living there.
Speaker 3: Nice for a week, but your expectant to live there.
Speaker 1: But for a boy. I'm dumb, and I thought I'd
Speaker 1: give it a go. Anyway, fast forward to about seven
Speaker 1: months of living in the Bay that's where they call
Speaker 1: her where I live. I had this gut feeling. He
Speaker 1: always tells me a little white lies that I would
Speaker 1: catch him on, but this felt different. Jack had his
Speaker 1: phone connected to his old iPad, so when he went
Speaker 1: out for a surf, I looked on his iPad.
Speaker 3: As one does.
Speaker 2: All I'm hearing is he's a surfer. Oh my god,
Speaker 2: How am I giving advice to people?
Speaker 1: You're good at giving advice, but when you listen to.
Speaker 3: You take your own advice. Ever, yeah, I should though.
Speaker 1: I looked on his Instagram and found messages between him
Speaker 1: and his ex that only broke up because she moved
Speaker 1: to Hawaii for surfing. It's kind of hot. There were
Speaker 1: messages between them all the way back to June twenty
Speaker 1: twenty three, like to know when I came back to
Speaker 1: visit the bay, saying how much they miss each other
Speaker 1: with red love hearts and saying that she was in
Speaker 1: the bay at the same time that they were there
Speaker 1: for a week. To this day, I don't know if
Speaker 1: they're actually caught up, because he went out for a
Speaker 1: surf every day and she does two. But he denies it.
Speaker 1: When I called him to say I wanted to talk
Speaker 1: to him about something when he got home, Miraculously, the
Speaker 1: whole conversation between him and then was deleted before he
Speaker 1: got home. No talk about guilty conscience. Wow. Fast forward
Speaker 1: a few months, another one of his ex's messages him
Speaker 1: on Instagram asking if we're still talking because she's still
Speaker 1: interested and doesn't want to waste her time, and he
Speaker 1: replies to her having a conversation with her, but it
Speaker 1: ends in saying it might not look like it, but yes,
Speaker 1: I guess we're still together.
Speaker 3: Fuck that.
Speaker 2: Okay, you are not moving your life to the Bay
Speaker 2: for this man. You are breaking up with him, as
Speaker 2: she already lives back to Gold Coast. I know, but
Speaker 2: she's moving back to Gold Coast.
Speaker 1: And again when I question him about it, miraculously, the
Speaker 1: whole conversation is deleted again. Ever since this, I've been
Speaker 1: so put off and never felt the same towards him.
Speaker 1: I still have so much love for him, but I
Speaker 1: don't want to hug or kiss him or anything. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because you're disgusted by him, Yeah, you're done, girl. He's
Speaker 1: been love bombing me ever since because he knows I
Speaker 1: treated him so well and he doesn't want to lose me.
Speaker 1: He brings me coffee every morning after his search with
Speaker 1: a note on it. He would literally wipe my ass
Speaker 1: if I ask.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but it brings you coffee and textas X. Coffee
Speaker 2: doesn't matter that much.
Speaker 3: About way.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and he should be like he's doing that now
Speaker 1: because he lose you. That's not innately in his being.
Speaker 3: And the moment you forgive him, he'll stop doing it.
Speaker 1: Yeah. We've now been here for a year and two
Speaker 1: munchs and there's no sign of any money saved or
Speaker 1: moving back time any anytime soon, like he promised. I
Speaker 1: miss home and I want to move back for all
Speaker 1: my money that I had saved to go home towards
Speaker 1: my puppy twenty one thousand dollars that bill in January
Speaker 1: to save his life. That's another story. So my day,
Speaker 1: La Mirry is I'm kind of stuck. I don't have
Speaker 1: any savings now to move home, and I'm living in
Speaker 1: his space room. We don't pay rent as we live
Speaker 1: at his dad's house. We aren't together and haven't been
Speaker 1: for about five months, and I'm just not feeling it.
Speaker 1: But I kind of have no choice but to stay
Speaker 1: here until I save up again. I can't move in
Speaker 1: with my mum or dad as though with their partners
Speaker 1: and kids, so there's no room. I don't have a
Speaker 1: job right now because my crippling anxiety and I've just
Speaker 1: started medication for it. I do a little bit of
Speaker 1: online work, which gets me by. At the moment, I
Speaker 1: feel so flat and unmotivated every day, and there's nothing
Speaker 1: here for me. I have two dogs and that's the
Speaker 1: only thing keeping me happy at the moment. I don't
Speaker 1: know what to do, and I feel so lost right now.
Speaker 1: I'm almost twenty three, and I feel like I should
Speaker 1: have my life on track. Send help. First of all,
Speaker 1: you're only twenty three, so you don't have to.
Speaker 3: Have your life on track twenty three.
Speaker 2: I'm twenty four and hunt, I've got no fucking idea
Speaker 2: what I'm going to do with the rest of my life.
Speaker 2: But honestly, I think, look, starting anxiety men's will be
Speaker 2: a great thing for the anxiety mm hmm. So hopefully
Speaker 2: that gets under control soon, I honestly reckon it takes
Speaker 2: probably a month a month maybe for things to go
Speaker 2: back to normal. But I think for Port of callers
Speaker 2: to start looking for work, I think that is step one.
Speaker 2: Do something chill, something like work as a receptionist or something.
Speaker 1: You know, work at a cafe where you're around people.
Speaker 1: I feel like you feel very isolated at the moment
Speaker 1: because you obviously only have.
Speaker 3: Here someone you can make friends.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think get a job at a cafe. I
Speaker 1: know you say you have crippling anxiety, but I think
Speaker 1: at the moment, you're in survival mode and you need
Speaker 1: to like make ends meet, get on fairy Floss in
Speaker 1: the Gold Coast and just move. You need to like
Speaker 1: work hard, put your head down, bump up for.
Speaker 3: A few weeks. By the way, is somewhere you can
Speaker 3: buy a roommate.
Speaker 2: Even if you have a friend that has a spare
Speaker 2: room or a couch, they'd be willing to let you
Speaker 2: stay on for a couple weeks until you find a place,
Speaker 2: just because honestly, the situation right now you obviously know
Speaker 2: isn't sustainable, It isn't ideal. But I think port of
Speaker 2: call one is to start saving some money. So you
Speaker 2: need to get a job.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that's like literally your only solution. Or
Speaker 1: you could go to your parents and say, I really
Speaker 1: need to get the fuck out of here. I understand why,
Speaker 1: Like I obviously I can't live with you guys. I'm
Speaker 1: sure they will be able to help either way, and
Speaker 1: just like get you out of there so then you
Speaker 1: can be relocated back in the Gold Coast. Your anxiety
Speaker 1: will go down, you'll feel much more happier, much more stable,
Speaker 1: you're not in this toxic cycle. That then we'll help
Speaker 1: you get a job and then earning some money, and.
Speaker 2: Then things will start looking up. But remember you are
Speaker 2: twenty three, so don't feel like you need to have
Speaker 2: your life on tracks just yet, like you need to
Speaker 2: get rid of that guilt because standard yeah.
Speaker 3: Very okay. Number two.
Speaker 2: I've been friends with this one girl for a while
Speaker 2: since about year nine. We became super super close and
Speaker 2: you're eleven, and then she and I started to go
Speaker 2: through some mental health struggles around the same time. We
Speaker 2: were originally in a group of five, but as she
Speaker 2: and I became closer and closer, we started to distance ourselves.
Speaker 2: My mum used to tell me at the time that
Speaker 2: she and I had an unhealthy attachment rooted in the
Speaker 2: fact that we were both a little unstable and suffering mentally.
Speaker 2: We would lean on each other for reassurance that what
Speaker 2: we were feeling was normal and we were simply outcasts
Speaker 2: who were different. She ended up getting diagnosed with OCD,
Speaker 2: which in turn made me feel like I had to
Speaker 2: When I write this out now, it sounds crazy, but
Speaker 2: at the time I just felt super misunderstood and thought
Speaker 2: she was the only person who got me and was
Speaker 2: there for me. So the last two years of high
Speaker 2: school we were both basically inseparable, really low in terms
Speaker 2: of mental health and just.
Speaker 3: Not doing well.
Speaker 2: But she became like a sister to me. Now it's
Speaker 2: my first year of UNI. I've finally started on an
Speaker 2: antidepressant as of December, which has helped me so much.
Speaker 2: I feel normal again. I can function in everyday life,
Speaker 2: talk to people, look after myself, and enjoy living. I've
Speaker 2: made heaps of friends at UNI, and I have been
Speaker 2: putting myself out there socially, going on dates and partying.
Speaker 3: This girl is the opposite.
Speaker 2: She's still stuck in the mental right she's been in
Speaker 2: for the past three years. She's not working or studying
Speaker 2: or going out. I'm her only friend. It makes me
Speaker 2: so so upset as we talked about how much better
Speaker 2: life would be once we got out of high school
Speaker 2: and how we can't wait to do everything together. I'm
Speaker 2: at that point of freedom, but she's not. The dilemma
Speaker 2: is that she's very upset about this. She feels like
Speaker 2: I'm abandoning her simply because I'm making new connections and
Speaker 2: doing things without her. When I do invite her to
Speaker 2: go out, ninety nine percent of the time, she tells
Speaker 2: me she doesn't feel well enough. She's also an insane,
Speaker 2: compulsive liar, which I think stems from mental struggles. She's
Speaker 2: lied about crazy things like having cancer as for six
Speaker 2: years as a child, having a stillborn brother, being related
Speaker 2: to random celebrities like The Rock, coming from poverty Okay,
Speaker 2: Anna Paul, and her mum having.
Speaker 3: To ment her at fifty.
Speaker 2: She uses these things to manipulate me and make me
Speaker 2: feel guilty, like a real victim complex. She's also quite
Speaker 2: sensitive and immature, so any type of conflict results in
Speaker 2: me always having to be the bigger person and just
Speaker 2: apologize and move on. I love her so much, but
Speaker 2: I think it's a toxic type of love. When I
Speaker 2: distance myself, I find myself missing her. I also try
Speaker 2: to look for the good parts of her personality and
Speaker 2: other people when making friends. It almost feels abusive in
Speaker 2: a way, and I'm so stuck on what to do.
Speaker 2: I'm now eighteen and in UNI and have the whole
Speaker 2: world at my hand, so I don't want to be
Speaker 2: held back.
Speaker 1: The complex of like her not taking she still feels
Speaker 1: so isolated, but like, you can't live your life to
Speaker 1: make her happy. And you guys were there for each
Speaker 1: other when you both needed her, and you've kind of
Speaker 1: grown up and you just need to leave that in
Speaker 1: the past. And obviously she's still stuck in that and
Speaker 1: that's not your responsibility to get her out of that anymore.
Speaker 1: She's not willing to change.
Speaker 3: Your shoes or whatever is your responsibility, you know.
Speaker 2: And I feel like you've taken the leap and it
Speaker 2: wasn't easy to like get out of that rut and
Speaker 2: allow yourself to enjoy life a little bit.
Speaker 3: And hopefully she will.
Speaker 2: Feel like that again one day when she feels like
Speaker 2: there is no other options. But right now she knows
Speaker 2: that she can just suck you back into it. I
Speaker 2: think she's being a bad friend by not being happy
Speaker 2: for you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that you're.
Speaker 3: Now out of that stage of life.
Speaker 1: You know, like you're doing all the right things by
Speaker 1: like offering to her to go and everything like that,
Speaker 1: but at the end of the day, you can't really
Speaker 1: control her and what she's doing. I think you need
Speaker 1: to just like really walk away. I know it's so hard.
Speaker 1: I had a girl in high school had a lot
Speaker 1: of mental problems and it weighed so heavily on me,
Speaker 1: and like I took her problems on as my own,
Speaker 1: but I ultimately have to step away from that because
Speaker 1: it was dangerous to me and like my wellbeing. And
Speaker 1: I know that that's super selfish, but like, you do
Speaker 1: need to put yourself first and the only person that
Speaker 1: you have in your life is you.
Speaker 2: So I feel like therapy is something that might be
Speaker 2: beneficial to this go. I'm not sure if that's something
Speaker 2: you could get her talk her into maybe giving it
Speaker 2: a go of talking to someone a psychologist, just because
Speaker 2: she also needs to start now taking steps to get
Speaker 2: out of that right And I almost feel like maybe
Speaker 2: she not that she doesn't want true, but she's not
Speaker 2: actively trying to. She's just hoping she can get you
Speaker 2: back in it. And I feel like that is an abusive,
Speaker 2: toxic kind of love, and you need to stay focused
Speaker 2: on the path ahead of like you wanting to enjoy life,
Speaker 2: and hopefully she'll one day feel that same way.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it might take her a little longer, but I
Speaker 1: think you always say, like I'm always here to support you,
Speaker 1: and I'm always here for you, but you really need
Speaker 1: to like, start doing things for yourself.
Speaker 2: Yeap, because that hole she has on you isn't going
Speaker 2: to benefit either of you in the long run.
Speaker 3: Agreed. But that sounds really, really, really fucking hard.
Speaker 1: It's very shitty. I'm so sorry. SUBII number three. My
Speaker 1: boyfriend and I have been together for two and a
Speaker 1: half years, but we haven't had sex for a month.
Speaker 1: When I finally pushed for an answer, he told me,
Speaker 1: Oh my fucking god, oh no. When I finally pushed
Speaker 1: for an answer, he told me, is because I've gained weight.
Speaker 3: What the fuck? Drop him?
Speaker 2: Puberty blue style, Get your friend to tell him that
Speaker 2: he's been dropped.
Speaker 3: This guy's done though.
Speaker 1: At the start of twenty twenty four, I was sixty
Speaker 1: two kilos and now I'm seventy. But last year I
Speaker 1: broke my back in Europe and I've only just gotten
Speaker 1: back to the gym in the last twelve weeks.
Speaker 2: Brother, The fact that you're even going to the gym
Speaker 2: after having broken your back, like.
Speaker 1: Babe, congratulate yourself on this.
Speaker 2: Yeah, be proud of yourself, and he should be proud
Speaker 2: of you as well. And understand that being probably stagnant
Speaker 2: for a while because of a broken back I'm not
Speaker 2: going to look like a fuck and supermodel hunt, but
Speaker 2: if you love me, it shouldn't matter.
Speaker 1: Yeah. When we met, I was nineteen and struggling with depression.
Speaker 1: I wasn't eating enough and overtraining. While I might have
Speaker 1: looked better on the outside, I actually wasn't happy. I
Speaker 1: can completely relate to on that. Then he also admitted
Speaker 1: that he's been curious about sleeping with other people since
Speaker 1: he's only been with two other people before me. I
Speaker 1: understand to degree, but after two years together it feels brutal.
Speaker 1: We got to the point of almost breaking up, talking
Speaker 1: about splitting furniture what would happen with that dog? Before
Speaker 1: he suddenly changed his mind and didn't mean any of
Speaker 1: it and wanted to stay together. I've been wanting to
Speaker 1: move to Melbourne for such a long time, but I've
Speaker 1: held off because of him. Now I feel like I've
Speaker 1: lost my confidence. I hate my body. I see myself
Speaker 1: the way he sees me. I don't have anyone to
Speaker 1: talk about it too, as my mom passed away recently.
Speaker 3: I'm so sorry to hear that guy.
Speaker 1: And I'd love to hear your advice. Would you stay
Speaker 1: and try work things out or leave? To see what's
Speaker 1: out there. Are his reasons about my weight valid? No, no,
Speaker 1: always is a big issue. No no, no.
Speaker 2: You congratulate yourself that you are feeling better mentally, that
Speaker 2: you're eating better, that you're functioning as a better person,
Speaker 2: do you know what I mean? Literally, that is amazing
Speaker 2: in its own right, So you should just be glad
Speaker 2: of that. Anyone making you feel like that isn't such
Speaker 2: a great thing, does not need to be in your life. Firstly,
Speaker 2: always gonna say you need to break up with this woman,
Speaker 2: You need to move to Melbourne and just experience it.
Speaker 2: If you want to move to Melbourne, don't let someone
Speaker 2: hold you back. And if you feel better inside then
Speaker 2: that is literally all that matters, and you probably look
Speaker 2: better too.
Speaker 1: Yeah. For someone to outly admit that you have gained
Speaker 1: weight and he's not having sex with you because he's
Speaker 1: not attracted to you is literally a self projection that
Speaker 1: he is insecure about himself and he needs to find
Speaker 1: a reason with you to obviously put you down and
Speaker 1: to make you feel shit about yourself. If someone truly
Speaker 1: loved you, they should not care about how much you
Speaker 1: weigh or what you look like, because love isn't a
Speaker 1: physical thing. Love is an emotional attachment to someone and
Speaker 1: they should be able to look past it. And it's
Speaker 1: disgusting that he has that otherwise.
Speaker 2: And I think he's scared to lose you when he
Speaker 2: finally was faced with that reality. But he's the type
Speaker 2: of guy that will the moment he thinks someone better
Speaker 2: comes along, someone that he thinks is better, I'll go
Speaker 2: to someone. You'll go to someone else. I'm not saying
Speaker 2: she will be better than you, but in his mind,
Speaker 2: he's just marting his time, I think.
Speaker 3: And you need to get out before.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he'll have something like Yeah, it's the typical thing
Speaker 1: of like he once he finds someone to line something
Speaker 1: up to to like jump to the next he will.
Speaker 2: And if you try to work, do you want to
Speaker 2: work it out with a guy that treats makes you
Speaker 2: feel that way? Do you want to marry a guy
Speaker 2: that makes you feel that way? What about when you
Speaker 2: gain weight when you're pregnant? Yeah then what Yeah? No,
Speaker 2: this guy sucks and he needs he needs to go.
Speaker 2: So I'm sorry you're experiencing that. That sounds allo. If
Speaker 2: you want to Melbourn, move to Melbourne. People are great.
Speaker 2: Here's everything's fun here. You will love it, and I
Speaker 2: feel like it will only be the start of your
Speaker 2: life when you come here.
Speaker 1: Ye take the dog and fucking run, babe, Yeah, take
Speaker 1: the dog.
Speaker 2: Okay, guys, So this has been a doozy. So I
Speaker 2: broke up with my boyfriend of nearly four years just
Speaker 2: over a month ago. I've been emotionally checked out of
Speaker 2: their relationship for a lot longer than I realized. I
Speaker 2: met this guy during the final weeks of me and
Speaker 2: my boyfriend dating and I had just moved to university.
Speaker 2: We were just friends and he was very flirtatious. Nevertheless,
Speaker 2: this is where it gets messy. A few days after
Speaker 2: breaking up, I got with this guy. I started seeing
Speaker 2: him most nights, but mainly just talking all night about
Speaker 2: what makes us tick and just deep stuff. I feel
Speaker 2: like I was finally receiving what I longed for for
Speaker 2: so long in.
Speaker 3: My previous relationship.
Speaker 2: The problem is not many of either of our friends
Speaker 2: or family trust either of us or think it's a
Speaker 2: good idea, as he didn't long ago break up with
Speaker 2: his girlfriend of a few years, and people are believing
Speaker 2: it's just going to be a spark in the wind
Speaker 2: and going to be very short lived basically, so hold up.
Speaker 1: She got out of a relationship a month ago.
Speaker 2: Met a guy he also had just broken up with
Speaker 2: his girlfriend, and they're like connecting really well, but it's
Speaker 2: really quick. I basically found out that this boy got
Speaker 2: with another girl the same night we had our first kiss,
Speaker 2: and he had multiple chances to tell me but didn't.
Speaker 3: I don't care that he kissed the girl.
Speaker 2: I care that he withheld that info from me, as
Speaker 2: he knew stuff like that was very triggering for me
Speaker 2: from past trauma. He was very apologetic, and we decided
Speaker 2: to go on a break to both better ourselves and
Speaker 2: figure out what we wanted before jumping into something so soon.
Speaker 3: I think that's fair.
Speaker 2: I think if you've both come out of relationships, jumping
Speaker 2: straight into another one I think is never particularly wise.
Speaker 1: Because it's all going to hit you one day.
Speaker 2: Because then you use that person to fix the issues
Speaker 2: of your last relationship when you need to fix them yourself. Yeah,
Speaker 2: he says he's going to rebuild my trust with his
Speaker 2: actions rather than words, and says.
Speaker 3: He's not going to get with anyone.
Speaker 2: I feel fucking crazy and don't know what to do
Speaker 2: because everything kind of just happened so quickly, But I
Speaker 2: think I really like him. But I've lost trust in
Speaker 2: myself since I believed I was going to marry my
Speaker 2: previous boyfriend before, and I'm scared of changing my mind
Speaker 2: down the track and inevitably hurting both of us.
Speaker 3: Help. I'm so confused.
Speaker 2: I don't know if I should work on myself or
Speaker 2: take the rest and try things with this boy.
Speaker 3: Work on yourself, worken yourself.
Speaker 2: This boy will still be there in a couple months
Speaker 2: or a year if you if he's the right one
Speaker 2: for you. But I have always said to my friends,
Speaker 2: my sister, everyone, that you do need that time to
Speaker 2: be single, or it's never gonna work hard.
Speaker 1: You need time to process everything that happened in your
Speaker 1: last relationship. You do not know who you are like
Speaker 1: outside of a relationship. You were in a relationship for
Speaker 1: four years. Discover and fall in love with yourself before
Speaker 1: you were fall in love with another person. And that's
Speaker 1: all I'm gonna say. Just don't be with him.
Speaker 2: I think you need to give it a break for
Speaker 2: at least a couple of months.
Speaker 1: Okay, last submission. How do you go about friends who
Speaker 1: sweep everything under the rug and throw digs at you
Speaker 1: weeks a month after incidents. I have a friend who
Speaker 1: doesn't like conflict unless we're with certain people. We went
Speaker 1: out for her birthday one night and conversations were had
Speaker 1: where I mentioned something that she had said to another
Speaker 1: group of girls about in which she denied and I
Speaker 1: got a little defensive A because I know you said
Speaker 1: it and b fucking owner babes. Anyway, the day after,
Speaker 1: she said it was all good, no bad feelings, let's
Speaker 1: leave the conversation we had in the past. A week later,
Speaker 1: she texts to say she doesn't think she can be
Speaker 1: around me when I'm drunk because I'm the worst person
Speaker 1: on earth, and then proceeds to laugh it off. At
Speaker 1: this point, I'm annoyed because I asked the other day
Speaker 1: if she wanted to clear the air and if there
Speaker 1: was anything about my behavior that night that didn't resonate
Speaker 1: with her, and she said, no, I had the best
Speaker 1: night with you girls, Honestly, best night I've had in
Speaker 1: a long time. I think, especially from my perspective as
Speaker 1: I've gotten older, the more I hate conflict.
Speaker 2: I just think if there's an issue at hand, and
Speaker 2: you really care about your friend and you want things
Speaker 2: to work out in a way without drama. It needs
Speaker 2: to be confronted immediately. So I think the fact that
Speaker 2: this girl lies about having issues is a problem from
Speaker 2: the drum, I think, yeah, in order to keep a
Speaker 2: happy friendship, I think you need to be always honest
Speaker 2: about each other when you have an issue immediately, like
Speaker 2: nip it in the bud and get it sorted. And
Speaker 2: this girl clearly thrives I think off the drama of it.
Speaker 1: I think she maybe is waiting for her but she
Speaker 1: says she's avoiding the.
Speaker 3: Conflict she gives off short term friendship.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because anyone that makes you feel bad, even in
Speaker 2: the sense of like I can't fucking be around you
Speaker 2: when you don't you're a fucking nightmare. Yeah, I don't know, girl,
Speaker 2: maybe you could be a bit of a nightmare, but
Speaker 2: it could be handled better, do you know what I mean?
Speaker 2: You can have a friend say that to you nicer.
Speaker 2: I just feel like it's all just a bit immature
Speaker 2: and dramatic.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think maybe just say to her like, oh okay,
Speaker 1: Like if we're truly over it and you had a
Speaker 1: nice night, like I wouldn't like this being mentioned again.
Speaker 2: You just need to talk to her about being honest
Speaker 2: and saying, like a poll, if I did do something
Speaker 2: wrong like that's fine, but I would always rather you come.
Speaker 3: And tell me immediately so I can fix it for you.
Speaker 2: Verse it kind of growing into a resentment thing of
Speaker 2: like her never wanting to be around you when she drinks.
Speaker 1: That's a good you know, I agree?
Speaker 2: All right, my loves, once again, we're going to be
Speaker 2: bedrotten in Palm Springs right now.
Speaker 3: And we love you all, love you so much.
Speaker 2: And hopefully you enjoy the next best ofs over the month,
Speaker 2: but we got to yell get fucked up in La.
Speaker 1: Make sure you're watching are tiktoks for.
Speaker 3: All the everything, all the food reviews? Guys. All right,
Speaker 3: we love you.
Speaker 1: Bye,