WEBVTT - My Mess Was the Map: The Business Story I've Never Told Properly 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:02.080 Dad was there and he saw me and he came 0:00:02.160 --> 0:00:04.400 up to me and he said, you're better than this. 0:00:04.840 --> 0:00:07.240 He didn't mean to come across as judgmental, but he 0:00:07.360 --> 0:00:09.560 just knew that the talents that he saw in me 0:00:09.840 --> 0:00:12.240 and how I am, he just was like, you shouldn't 0:00:12.240 --> 0:00:14.720 be doing this. And that was hard. It was hard 0:00:14.760 --> 0:00:16.840 to hear. There was definitely a hit to the ego, 0:00:16.920 --> 0:00:20.880 that's for sure. Hello guys, and welcome back to Stepping Up. 0:00:21.160 --> 0:00:24.320 I'm recording this actually at home. I set up a 0:00:24.360 --> 0:00:26.840 little I know, if you guys remember, so the first 0:00:26.840 --> 0:00:29.360 season of Stepping Up, I recorded everything from home, and 0:00:29.400 --> 0:00:31.600 then obviously now we're with Nova, which is super exciting 0:00:31.640 --> 0:00:34.400 but which I will talk about a bit in this episode. 0:00:34.440 --> 0:00:37.239 But life gets busy, you know, life just gets so chaotic. 0:00:37.280 --> 0:00:38.760 And I was like, you know what, and I love 0:00:38.880 --> 0:00:40.720 going to Nova. I love the vibe. I love being 0:00:40.720 --> 0:00:42.839 on to record there. But it's been a bit of 0:00:42.960 --> 0:00:47.440 a season over here at the Pace House with you 0:00:47.680 --> 0:00:49.639 kids and work and all the things. You know, we're 0:00:49.680 --> 0:00:52.320 doing our planners for twenty twenty seven, which is crazy, 0:00:52.720 --> 0:00:55.440 and it's funny with that. I'm always like thinking it's 0:00:55.560 --> 0:00:58.040 a year ahead than what It is just because in 0:00:58.080 --> 0:01:00.880 my brain, I've been living in twenty twenty seven for 0:01:00.920 --> 0:01:03.920 a while now. We start our plannings in January, so 0:01:03.960 --> 0:01:05.840 that's a little bit of insight into that, but you're 0:01:05.880 --> 0:01:09.160 going to get a lot more insight into what it 0:01:09.520 --> 0:01:13.360 happens behind the scenes at you know, running a stationary 0:01:13.400 --> 0:01:17.720 brand at e COMM brand that started from my garage. 0:01:17.840 --> 0:01:21.720 And this isn't going to be an episode just for 0:01:21.760 --> 0:01:24.360 people who are interested in business or business owners. This 0:01:24.400 --> 0:01:29.440 is for literally everybody on doing it scared because none 0:01:29.440 --> 0:01:31.520 of us are ever ready and you will know that 0:01:31.680 --> 0:01:34.440 very much by the end of this episode. There's so 0:01:34.520 --> 0:01:37.679 much in this episode I you know, haven't shared anywhere 0:01:37.680 --> 0:01:39.800 else except my book. I shared a fair bit of 0:01:39.800 --> 0:01:42.039 that in my book. But there's so many fuck ups 0:01:42.040 --> 0:01:45.160 I've done in my business. It's insane, And in this 0:01:45.240 --> 0:01:47.320 episode you were going to look and in this episode 0:01:47.319 --> 0:01:50.760 you're going to see the transformation and like, just how 0:01:51.080 --> 0:01:57.200 ironic it is that me from where I came from 0:01:57.240 --> 0:02:00.240 and how my brain works and how chaotic I was 0:02:00.280 --> 0:02:02.240 as a kid and as a teenager and still am. 0:02:02.520 --> 0:02:06.120 It's so insanely ironic that I run a stationary brand. 0:02:06.400 --> 0:02:10.760 It's insane. But back to the house, so over here, Like, 0:02:10.840 --> 0:02:12.560 as you guys know, we moved into his house a 0:02:12.639 --> 0:02:14.680 year and a half ago now, which is insane, but 0:02:14.919 --> 0:02:16.639 we've had a little bit of progress. We want to 0:02:16.639 --> 0:02:19.440 give a bit of a life update first, but we finally 0:02:19.520 --> 0:02:22.960 the laundry is going in. We've had we've got like taps, 0:02:23.080 --> 0:02:26.480 which is really helpful. Like who would have thought having 0:02:26.560 --> 0:02:28.720 running water in your house would be helpful? Now, don't 0:02:28.720 --> 0:02:31.080 get me wrong, we have had taps for a while, 0:02:31.120 --> 0:02:32.760 but now it's like we've got them in all the 0:02:32.800 --> 0:02:37.120 bathrooms and the laundry and stuff we have. Yeah, we've 0:02:37.120 --> 0:02:40.080 had a bit of progress lately, which is good. You'll 0:02:40.120 --> 0:02:42.600 definitely get some more pace house updates on like Instagram 0:02:42.600 --> 0:02:44.799 and stuff like that. And if you guys knew here, 0:02:45.520 --> 0:02:47.880 my husband and I Ryan, he's a builder. We just 0:02:48.000 --> 0:02:51.640 moved into our dream home. It's unfinished because life happens, 0:02:51.680 --> 0:02:55.919 you know, and shit's expensive, which is fine. So I'm 0:02:55.960 --> 0:02:59.960 turning our unfinished house into a home, which is an eventure. 0:03:00.200 --> 0:03:02.440 But I do love it because, you know, because the 0:03:02.440 --> 0:03:05.680 girls have also seen our two kids, they've seen what 0:03:05.840 --> 0:03:08.000 it takes like, they've seen me behind the scenes. With 0:03:08.040 --> 0:03:10.280 my business. They've seen Ryan build it. They see what 0:03:10.440 --> 0:03:12.919 goes into it, and like the hard work that goes into, 0:03:13.120 --> 0:03:16.799 you know, bloody creating a home. I remember the day 0:03:16.840 --> 0:03:19.240 we've got door handles on the doors. The girls were 0:03:19.280 --> 0:03:20.920 just like, Mum, I've got a door handle and I 0:03:20.960 --> 0:03:24.360 was like, go you good thing. It's just the little 0:03:24.360 --> 0:03:29.600 things you know in life. But yes, so I'm literally 0:03:29.639 --> 0:03:32.480 just really focusing on getting ourselves set up here. And 0:03:32.520 --> 0:03:34.160 I know that does sound silly because it has been 0:03:34.200 --> 0:03:36.160 a year and a half, but as you guys know, 0:03:36.200 --> 0:03:38.960 I wrote my book which is Mastering My Messy Your Life, 0:03:39.000 --> 0:03:41.640 which is I'm just love seeing all your feedback and 0:03:41.680 --> 0:03:43.280 how many of you guys are reading it that you 0:03:43.520 --> 0:03:46.880 relate to it so well. It means a lot to me, 0:03:47.000 --> 0:03:50.240 so thank you. And yeah, like we just you got 0:03:50.240 --> 0:03:53.080 to take things by the budget. You got to take 0:03:53.120 --> 0:03:55.240 things by the balls, by the budget. So we're just 0:03:55.280 --> 0:04:00.800 doing things in phases, which is fine. But before you 0:04:00.880 --> 0:04:02.200 roll your eyes and you're like, oh, here we go, 0:04:02.240 --> 0:04:04.880 Steph's doing a bloody business episode. As I said, this 0:04:05.160 --> 0:04:10.080 episode is incredibly important for everyone. You know, by the 0:04:10.160 --> 0:04:14.760 end of this episode, you're going to truly know and 0:04:14.960 --> 0:04:19.240 see and understand that you know, nobody knows what they're doing, 0:04:20.240 --> 0:04:24.000 and especially the people you look up to. Most they 0:04:24.040 --> 0:04:26.440 did not know what they're doing, and they likely still 0:04:26.480 --> 0:04:28.919 don't know what they're doing. Because, as I say, new level, 0:04:28.960 --> 0:04:32.359 new devil, no matter if it's business, if it's you know, hobbies, 0:04:32.400 --> 0:04:36.880 if it's at work, anything, whenever you hit a new level, 0:04:37.120 --> 0:04:40.320 there's going to be new hardships and new hurdles to cross, 0:04:40.360 --> 0:04:43.680 and usually they're bigger. They always are bigger. So I 0:04:43.720 --> 0:04:46.320 always say, new level, new devil. And I still don't 0:04:46.360 --> 0:04:50.599 know what I'm doing. You know, I started this like Instagram, blog, whatever, 0:04:50.720 --> 0:04:54.760 ten years ago, and you know my business steph Face Planners, 0:04:55.720 --> 0:04:57.920 which is, you know, tools for messy minds of the world. 0:04:58.000 --> 0:04:59.760 I started that like six years ago, and I still 0:04:59.760 --> 0:05:01.719 don't I know what I'm doing. So then you hire 0:05:01.760 --> 0:05:04.159 people that do know what they're doing in certain areas, 0:05:04.160 --> 0:05:07.760 which is very helpful, but you know, no one knows 0:05:07.800 --> 0:05:10.120 what they're doing, not like not the people you follow, 0:05:10.240 --> 0:05:13.400 not the founder you look up to, not not like 0:05:13.440 --> 0:05:15.880 even people in your own lives that you think like, 0:05:15.920 --> 0:05:17.880 you look at them and they just have such confidence 0:05:18.680 --> 0:05:20.919 and you think they just know their shit, but I 0:05:21.120 --> 0:05:24.920 trust you that when they started and even now they're 0:05:24.920 --> 0:05:28.200 winging it in every sense of the word. And the 0:05:28.240 --> 0:05:30.920 thing is that's not bad news. That's very much good 0:05:30.960 --> 0:05:34.760 news to show you guys that, like, the people who 0:05:34.800 --> 0:05:37.880 do the thing aren't the ones that figured it out first. 0:05:38.400 --> 0:05:42.760 You achieve things by doing, not by planning. What you 0:05:42.800 --> 0:05:47.400 can learn by actually doing will always trump you over planning. 0:05:47.480 --> 0:05:51.800 And again I'm a planner, brand founder, whatever. They're just 0:05:51.839 --> 0:05:54.280 the ones that started before they figured it out yet, 0:05:54.480 --> 0:05:57.040 and you figure it out along the way. Just like motherhood, 0:05:57.080 --> 0:05:58.880 I know them. Any of the mom's listening right now, 0:05:58.920 --> 0:06:01.800 like you could not read. Look, I remember before I 0:06:01.839 --> 0:06:04.080 got pregnant with Harper, I read every baby book. I 0:06:04.120 --> 0:06:05.400 was like, I'm going to be so ready for this. 0:06:05.480 --> 0:06:08.880 I'm going to like kill this. And you cannot learn 0:06:09.360 --> 0:06:12.240 by planning. You have to learn by doing, and that's 0:06:12.240 --> 0:06:15.960 how we grow unfortunately at times. So and this is 0:06:15.960 --> 0:06:17.960 good again. This is going to apply to anything you 0:06:18.040 --> 0:06:20.320 do in life, whether you want to apply for a 0:06:20.360 --> 0:06:22.440 new job or start a new hobby or maybe like 0:06:22.480 --> 0:06:24.719 go to a new book club or something. It's always 0:06:24.760 --> 0:06:27.719 just doing it scared now in order for you to 0:06:28.000 --> 0:06:31.320 understand the transformation here, but also the lesson in this, 0:06:31.520 --> 0:06:35.159 you need to understand where I came from. Now, I 0:06:35.279 --> 0:06:39.600 was always the messy kid. I was so bad that 0:06:41.560 --> 0:06:44.240 my mother. I got home from school one day and 0:06:44.839 --> 0:06:50.080 I came home to a plastic blue and white shower 0:06:50.200 --> 0:06:53.640 curtain that had dolphins frolicking across it, and it was 0:06:53.720 --> 0:06:57.680 hung across my bookshelves, and in my bookshelves were like 0:06:57.839 --> 0:07:00.960 toys and books and just little things that I used 0:07:01.000 --> 0:07:04.920 to collect. And it was absolute. It was an absolute mess, 0:07:04.960 --> 0:07:07.320 and my mother couldn't deal with looking at it anymore, 0:07:07.320 --> 0:07:10.960 so she hung a shower curtain. And it's also a 0:07:11.000 --> 0:07:14.480 metaphor for how we handled things in our family back then, 0:07:14.600 --> 0:07:16.360 is that we used We used to hide the mess 0:07:16.400 --> 0:07:20.040 behind the curtain and pretend it wasn't there. Unfortunately, we're 0:07:20.080 --> 0:07:23.960 doing that if you continue to let the mess accumulate. 0:07:24.440 --> 0:07:26.840 There's only so long that the mess is going to 0:07:26.840 --> 0:07:28.800 be able to hide behind a curtain before it becomes 0:07:28.800 --> 0:07:32.120 bursting out and falls all over the floor. Now, I 0:07:32.200 --> 0:07:35.960 remember I was always just off with the fairies. I 0:07:36.440 --> 0:07:40.720 was diagnosed with add at age six, and for a 0:07:40.720 --> 0:07:43.560 girl in the nineties, that was you know, pretty rare. 0:07:44.120 --> 0:07:46.440 I just couldn't have anything I wasn't interested in, I 0:07:46.480 --> 0:07:50.400 could not focus on. I was always reactive, you know, 0:07:50.440 --> 0:07:52.920 as I got older, I was never organized. I was 0:07:53.040 --> 0:07:56.840 very very reactive, and I was just an absolute mess. 0:07:57.840 --> 0:08:03.000 I you know, I always just felt like everyone's brains 0:08:03.480 --> 0:08:06.200 must have just been so nice and quiet, and mine 0:08:06.240 --> 0:08:09.640 just had twenty million conversations going on at once. And 0:08:09.680 --> 0:08:11.640 you know, I remember sitting in the classroom in primary 0:08:11.680 --> 0:08:15.520 school and just constantly zoning out the window because you know, 0:08:16.360 --> 0:08:18.760 there's a bird out the window. And then I could hear, 0:08:18.920 --> 0:08:21.600 you know, the pencils scraping against the paper, and like 0:08:21.680 --> 0:08:23.960 feet tapping on the floor and then the chalkboard, and 0:08:24.000 --> 0:08:26.160 it was just the world has just always been so 0:08:26.280 --> 0:08:30.280 loud for me. And so I find that I disassociate 0:08:30.400 --> 0:08:33.040 or I numb out by zoning out. And that got 0:08:33.040 --> 0:08:35.120 me into a lot of trouble as a kid and 0:08:35.160 --> 0:08:38.040 as an adult as well. And I do see that 0:08:38.120 --> 0:08:41.520 a lot in my kids now. So she one of 0:08:41.559 --> 0:08:43.559 the girls, she says, my teacher says this, and I'm 0:08:43.600 --> 0:08:45.440 like yes, and I'm like, you know what I get 0:08:45.480 --> 0:08:49.200 that I do? And you know, I always felt like 0:08:49.320 --> 0:08:52.480 I just my brain was always off in a million 0:08:52.520 --> 0:08:56.120 different directions, and that very much showed up later. I 0:08:56.200 --> 0:08:59.400 remember sitting in high school and everyone was saying what 0:08:59.440 --> 0:09:01.320 they wanted to be when they grow up, you know. 0:09:02.120 --> 0:09:03.920 You know, my friend Evan wanted to be an engineer, 0:09:03.960 --> 0:09:05.760 and then my friend Ash was going to be a teacher, 0:09:05.920 --> 0:09:07.760 and I was like, I don't know what I want 0:09:07.760 --> 0:09:10.280 to be, you know, I always wanted to just do 0:09:10.400 --> 0:09:13.160 all of it. I remember being seventy years old and 0:09:13.559 --> 0:09:16.600 I would get these old sheets we had. We had 0:09:16.640 --> 0:09:19.880 a bunch of old sheets in our house, and I 0:09:19.920 --> 0:09:22.600 would draw Pokemon onto them with text and then like 0:09:22.679 --> 0:09:24.840 cut them out and i'd have the front layer, which 0:09:24.880 --> 0:09:26.920 was the drawing in the back, and then I would 0:09:26.960 --> 0:09:29.240 sew them up and then stuff them with more sheets 0:09:29.320 --> 0:09:32.040 and make them into like Pokemon toys, and I'd sell 0:09:32.040 --> 0:09:34.439 them on the street to the kids. So I've always 0:09:34.520 --> 0:09:37.600 just had this like entrepreneurial streak to me. And then 0:09:37.600 --> 0:09:40.719 when I wasn't selling Pokemon toys, you know, I did 0:09:40.720 --> 0:09:43.280 a really killer nine Tales. I remember selling that for 0:09:43.400 --> 0:09:45.640 like three bucks, So I was a bargain in my opinion. 0:09:46.160 --> 0:09:49.120 I was inside and I was running my own newspaper 0:09:49.160 --> 0:09:52.480 called The Dolphin Daily, very on trend. It's all about 0:09:52.480 --> 0:09:55.360 the aquatic mammals. Okay, the publication for that, and I 0:09:55.400 --> 0:09:57.960 would interview my name and dad on like their favorite 0:09:57.960 --> 0:10:01.480 breakfast food and you know, what their favorite color was, 0:10:01.520 --> 0:10:04.840 because the people needed to know the truth. So I 0:10:04.920 --> 0:10:07.679 had this bustling newspaper as a kid as well, and 0:10:08.360 --> 0:10:11.320 I felt like that throughout, you know, my teenage years. 0:10:11.360 --> 0:10:13.559 I wanted to do fashion, I wanted to do interior design, 0:10:13.640 --> 0:10:15.240 but I also wanted to be a journalist because I 0:10:15.280 --> 0:10:18.760 loved writing, and I remember writing was always my outlet, 0:10:18.960 --> 0:10:20.319 you know, when I felt like I didn't have a 0:10:20.400 --> 0:10:25.320 voice growing up at home. You know, again, definitely if 0:10:25.360 --> 0:10:28.160 you interested in this story and like how I turned, 0:10:28.360 --> 0:10:30.640 like mastered my messy mind and things like that and 0:10:30.679 --> 0:10:33.839 my messy life, definitely like read it because I go 0:10:33.880 --> 0:10:37.480 into it a lot more. But my childhood was pretty chaotic, 0:10:37.760 --> 0:10:41.640 and it was it was pretty rough, and you know, 0:10:41.760 --> 0:10:43.240 there's always going to be people out there that have 0:10:43.280 --> 0:10:47.360 it worse. But it's when I felt like I didn't 0:10:47.400 --> 0:10:51.760 have a say or anywhere to really go to. When 0:10:51.840 --> 0:10:54.200 my nan wasn't home, I would just write and I 0:10:54.200 --> 0:10:56.559 would just escape into these worlds. So I would write 0:10:56.640 --> 0:10:59.600 and read and that's why Harry Potter became my biggest 0:10:59.679 --> 0:11:03.160 like my friends, which sounds so lame, but I was 0:11:03.160 --> 0:11:07.160 just always lost in books or lost in worries. So 0:11:07.440 --> 0:11:09.320 you know, I wanted to do journalism and all these things. 0:11:09.320 --> 0:11:10.760 And then I was in high school and everyone just 0:11:10.800 --> 0:11:13.080 knew their one thing, like I'm like, I just don't 0:11:13.080 --> 0:11:14.800 know what my one thing is. Like I didn't want 0:11:14.800 --> 0:11:16.320 one path. And you know, when I was a kid, 0:11:16.320 --> 0:11:18.640 I thought me having all these hobbies in interest was 0:11:18.679 --> 0:11:20.959 a positive thing. But as I got older, I realized 0:11:21.000 --> 0:11:23.200 the world just wants to put you into a box. 0:11:23.600 --> 0:11:25.559 They want you to follow the path that they all 0:11:25.640 --> 0:11:28.560 know is safe and what works, because that's what society 0:11:28.559 --> 0:11:31.079 tells us to do. And I didn't want to do that. 0:11:31.280 --> 0:11:33.880 And you know, my friends would call me crunchy and 0:11:34.400 --> 0:11:36.959 with you guys don't know this millennial reference, it means, 0:11:37.440 --> 0:11:39.520 you know, I had like I had actually dark blonde 0:11:39.520 --> 0:11:41.200 hair on the outside, but it's like brown hair, brown 0:11:41.200 --> 0:11:42.960 on the outside and blonde on the inside. And I 0:11:43.000 --> 0:11:45.760 got caught that because I was just always off thinking 0:11:46.000 --> 0:11:49.319 of cool ideas I can do, and all these different things. 0:11:50.160 --> 0:11:52.319 And I just remember sitting in the library in year 0:11:52.320 --> 0:11:55.839 ten and our teacher was hammering home how important the 0:11:56.000 --> 0:11:58.800 HC is. Like if you don't do well in this, 0:11:59.000 --> 0:12:01.760 like you're done for basically, like you need to do this, 0:12:01.840 --> 0:12:04.360 go to UNI, get the job, work nine to five 0:12:04.840 --> 0:12:06.920 until you're like eighty years old, and then retire, you 0:12:06.960 --> 0:12:09.160 know what I mean. And I remember sitting there and 0:12:09.200 --> 0:12:11.440 they're telling me like I had to pick what my 0:12:11.559 --> 0:12:15.360 thing was, and I remember thinking, like, dude, I just 0:12:15.880 --> 0:12:17.959 like my boobs just came in, and now you want 0:12:18.000 --> 0:12:19.959 me to pick what uniform I need to shove them into, 0:12:20.120 --> 0:12:21.680 Like I don't even know how to operate them yet. 0:12:22.640 --> 0:12:24.560 Like it was just wild to me. And I just 0:12:24.679 --> 0:12:27.959 always said like I felt like I just felt like 0:12:28.000 --> 0:12:30.400 everyone got a map and mine was from TEMU and 0:12:30.400 --> 0:12:34.840 it smells funny. I just did not understand everyone knew 0:12:35.120 --> 0:12:39.040 what exactly they wanted to do. And from there, as 0:12:39.040 --> 0:12:42.120 you could clearly tell, I became known as the jack 0:12:42.160 --> 0:12:44.760 of all trades. I just remember so many times that 0:12:44.840 --> 0:12:47.280 you know, I was in between career choices or what 0:12:47.320 --> 0:12:49.120 I was doing, you know, After high school, I went 0:12:49.160 --> 0:12:51.760 to UNI. I did journalism, but I didn't want to 0:12:51.800 --> 0:12:54.040 have to write about politics and board guys in suits, 0:12:54.080 --> 0:12:58.480 like that's boring, so I reluctant. I did finish my degree, 0:12:58.520 --> 0:13:01.320 but it was painful. And from there I wanted to 0:13:01.320 --> 0:13:03.559 do makeup because I wanted to make people feel beautiful 0:13:03.600 --> 0:13:05.800 and bring out their inner beauty. So I went and 0:13:05.800 --> 0:13:08.760 did makeup school, I went, traveled to Sydney. I did that, 0:13:09.120 --> 0:13:11.959 you know, full time, and then I also worked multiple jobs, 0:13:12.200 --> 0:13:14.600 and you know, it wasn't like I was sitting on 0:13:14.640 --> 0:13:17.480 my ass, like I was working really hard. And by then, 0:13:17.559 --> 0:13:20.320 you know, I had met my then boyfriend Ryan, who's 0:13:20.320 --> 0:13:23.680 my husband now, and we were working towards these goals together, 0:13:24.040 --> 0:13:27.120 and I was making decent income from all the things. 0:13:27.160 --> 0:13:29.160 But I just remember always seeing, you know, maybe catching 0:13:29.200 --> 0:13:31.800 up with friends from school or seeing our friends from 0:13:31.840 --> 0:13:34.679 that time, OK, at parties and things, and they're like, 0:13:34.760 --> 0:13:36.400 or Steph, what are you doing? And then I would 0:13:36.440 --> 0:13:38.560 probably be doing the next thing and the next thing, 0:13:38.600 --> 0:13:40.440 and they'd always say, oh, step here, just a jack 0:13:40.480 --> 0:13:42.439 of all trades, and I always would wait for them 0:13:42.440 --> 0:13:47.200 to say master of none. But it was just you know, 0:13:47.240 --> 0:13:49.000 and I did. I'd see my friends they had gone 0:13:49.000 --> 0:13:50.840 to UNI and then they'd gone and got the job 0:13:50.880 --> 0:13:53.360 that they were technically meant to get from UNI, and 0:13:53.400 --> 0:13:54.880 I was like, no, I don't want to do that. 0:13:54.960 --> 0:13:58.280 Like I obviously didn't believe in the whole sunk costs fallacy, 0:13:58.320 --> 0:14:01.960 which is, you know, people sticking things out just because 0:14:01.960 --> 0:14:04.360 of the time they've already put into it. I just 0:14:04.400 --> 0:14:06.120 didn't believe that. And I think a lot of that 0:14:06.160 --> 0:14:09.000 came from my nan, Like she was always very much like, 0:14:09.080 --> 0:14:11.480 you go and do what you're passionate about, and she'd 0:14:11.480 --> 0:14:13.360 always tell me, like, you're going to go on to 0:14:13.360 --> 0:14:16.440 do such great things. And I just didn't see that 0:14:16.559 --> 0:14:19.160 for myself, especially when the world had already gotten to 0:14:19.240 --> 0:14:22.120 me by then that you know, my passion and my 0:14:22.240 --> 0:14:24.520 burning desire to do all these things they had reduced 0:14:24.560 --> 0:14:28.120 to like a little flickering flame. And it was rough, 0:14:28.160 --> 0:14:30.200 and I just didn't have a whole lot of self confidence. 0:14:30.800 --> 0:14:32.720 And it's kind of weld to think what I do now, 0:14:32.800 --> 0:14:35.440 like having the podcast and talking on live TV. And 0:14:35.480 --> 0:14:37.280 I've told you guys this before, but you know, before 0:14:37.280 --> 0:14:39.280 I do speeches at UNI, I had to go skull 0:14:39.360 --> 0:14:41.800 beer because I just had no confidence in myself. So 0:14:41.840 --> 0:14:44.680 I had to reach for the liquid confidence. And then 0:14:44.720 --> 0:14:47.120 after makeup school, I decided, you know what I really 0:14:47.200 --> 0:14:48.960 like fitness. I got really into fitness because I had 0:14:49.000 --> 0:14:50.600 put on twenty five kilos in a year and then 0:14:50.600 --> 0:14:52.840 I lost it and I just really felt passionate about it. 0:14:53.240 --> 0:14:54.720 So I went and worked at a gym too, and 0:14:54.760 --> 0:14:57.600 then I did makeup on the weekends. So I was just, 0:14:57.800 --> 0:15:01.280 you know, seemingly it looked like I was all over 0:15:01.320 --> 0:15:03.400 the place and I could not stick to something. But 0:15:03.440 --> 0:15:05.040 to me, I was just trying to figure out what 0:15:05.080 --> 0:15:07.280 my one thing was and I wanted to try things 0:15:07.280 --> 0:15:11.680 on for sites. I still remember this time, and I 0:15:11.720 --> 0:15:14.360 was handing out flies outside of Woolworths when I was 0:15:14.360 --> 0:15:16.400 working at the gym. So I would work at the 0:15:16.440 --> 0:15:18.000 gym during the week full time, and then on the 0:15:18.040 --> 0:15:20.800 weekends I had my own makeup business, which was actually 0:15:21.000 --> 0:15:23.120 like very successful. I was booked out for two years 0:15:23.160 --> 0:15:25.480 in advance. Then on the weekend I would do weddings 0:15:26.120 --> 0:15:27.760 and you know, Ryan and I at that time, we 0:15:27.760 --> 0:15:30.880 were saving for our wedding and it was great money. 0:15:30.880 --> 0:15:33.320 And I just remember this like Dad. Dad was there 0:15:33.360 --> 0:15:35.280 and he saw me and he came up to me 0:15:35.760 --> 0:15:38.880 and he said you're better than this. And I know, 0:15:39.600 --> 0:15:44.040 like my dad meant well and he didn't mean to 0:15:44.080 --> 0:15:47.640 come across as judgmental, but he just knew that the 0:15:47.680 --> 0:15:49.760 talents and I guess the talents that he saw in 0:15:49.800 --> 0:15:56.640 me and how I am. He just was like, you, you 0:15:54.520 --> 0:15:57.120 shouldn't be doing this. And that was hard. It was 0:15:57.200 --> 0:15:59.520 hard to hear. It was definitely a hit to the ego, 0:15:59.560 --> 0:16:03.360 that's for sure. But back then I didn't realize that, 0:16:04.360 --> 0:16:09.360 you know, it was just such a different time. Like 0:16:09.480 --> 0:16:12.000 a key example is when teachers would say to us, 0:16:12.040 --> 0:16:13.360 you know, you need to learn math because you're not 0:16:13.400 --> 0:16:14.920 going to be able to walk around with a calculator 0:16:14.920 --> 0:16:18.920 in your pocket, and we literally do everything. Is just 0:16:18.960 --> 0:16:21.760 such a different time, and you're finding now that the 0:16:21.880 --> 0:16:24.600 people that the multi passionate messes of the world, they're 0:16:24.600 --> 0:16:26.400 the ones that are coming out on top. Now. You know, 0:16:26.440 --> 0:16:30.040 we've got our online We've got you know, the online 0:16:30.040 --> 0:16:32.680 world where you can literally make money from what you're 0:16:32.720 --> 0:16:35.280 passionate about. And I had no idea like that was 0:16:35.320 --> 0:16:39.160 even going to be a thing one day now, my 0:16:39.360 --> 0:16:41.880 love for planners, You're probably wondering, like, Okay, Stephan, where 0:16:41.880 --> 0:16:44.840 does this come in? Well, It was all sparked by 0:16:44.880 --> 0:16:47.280 a two thousandth movie called New York Minute with Mary 0:16:47.320 --> 0:16:49.640 Kate and Ashley the Awsome Twins. And I remember watching 0:16:49.640 --> 0:16:54.080 this movie and there was Mary Kate who played Riley. 0:16:54.120 --> 0:16:55.400 I think her name was Riley in it. I can't 0:16:55.400 --> 0:17:00.800 remember anyway, Jane and know what was her name? Anyway, 0:17:01.080 --> 0:17:04.520 Mary Kate played like the messy, chaotic twin in the movie, 0:17:04.560 --> 0:17:06.160 so she was very much me. She had the band 0:17:06.160 --> 0:17:08.560 T shirt. She was just an absolute mess, like couldn't 0:17:08.560 --> 0:17:11.320 get herself out of bed. And then there was Jane Ryan. Now, 0:17:11.440 --> 0:17:15.160 Jane Ryan became my icon. She was so well put together. 0:17:15.240 --> 0:17:17.960 She was super organized, Like I remember in the opening scene, 0:17:18.000 --> 0:17:20.760 like she wakes up and she opens her planner, and 0:17:20.840 --> 0:17:23.000 when I laid my eyes on this planner, it was 0:17:23.160 --> 0:17:26.120 absolutely beautiful. I'd always loved the start of a new 0:17:26.119 --> 0:17:28.240 school year when you'd get your new stationary and it 0:17:28.280 --> 0:17:32.119 would just feel like, you know, a reset, like you know, 0:17:32.280 --> 0:17:34.000 new year, knew me kind of thing. It's like you 0:17:34.000 --> 0:17:35.800 know when you'd rearrange your bedroom as a kid and 0:17:35.840 --> 0:17:37.920 you'd be like, yeah, like I'm a new person. Fuck. Yeah. 0:17:38.800 --> 0:17:42.080 It was like that. But when I saw her and 0:17:42.080 --> 0:17:46.240 that planner. I was just obsessed ever since. Now. I 0:17:46.280 --> 0:17:49.600 don't think it was essentially the planner itself, but it 0:17:49.640 --> 0:17:51.879 was a symbol of everything that I wasn't and everything 0:17:51.880 --> 0:17:54.080 that I wanted to be. I wanted to be proactive, 0:17:54.080 --> 0:17:55.879 I wanted to be organized. I wanted to have a 0:17:55.920 --> 0:17:58.960 memory that actually worked. I didn't want to be all 0:17:58.960 --> 0:18:00.919 over the place all the time. I didn't want to 0:18:00.920 --> 0:18:04.000 be such a mess. So that actually stuck with me 0:18:04.160 --> 0:18:06.359 for a long time. And hey, look, I had tried 0:18:06.640 --> 0:18:09.080 so many planners and I'd always only ever last two 0:18:09.119 --> 0:18:11.840 weeks because for so many reasons. The way it was 0:18:11.880 --> 0:18:13.920 set up was boring as dog shit. It was always 0:18:13.920 --> 0:18:16.600 black and white inside. It was very boring. But also 0:18:16.640 --> 0:18:19.280 they didn't have like the little constant reminders things that, yes, 0:18:19.400 --> 0:18:21.760 maybe to everyone else comes naturally, but not to me, 0:18:22.000 --> 0:18:26.040 So you know, for example, like writing out birthdays or 0:18:26.040 --> 0:18:28.719 writing out homework, like when things are you because otherwise 0:18:28.800 --> 0:18:30.879 I just look at a blank page. Sometimes I'm like, 0:18:30.920 --> 0:18:33.439 what am I even writing? Now? This is kind of 0:18:33.440 --> 0:18:35.119 like the story of the Chicken and the egg, like 0:18:35.160 --> 0:18:37.679 which one came first? Now, for me, the thing that 0:18:37.760 --> 0:18:41.119 came first was just another mummy blog. Now if you 0:18:41.200 --> 0:18:44.040 follow me back then you would remember them just another 0:18:44.080 --> 0:18:48.080 mummy blog era and the stepfing era. Now before you 0:18:48.119 --> 0:18:50.840 know this big blog and you know the TV interviews 0:18:50.880 --> 0:18:53.679 and all these things and like the podcast and staff 0:18:53.720 --> 0:18:59.159 pace planners. This all started from a mum who just 0:18:59.160 --> 0:19:01.080 had her first baby, who were sitting in the lound 0:19:01.160 --> 0:19:04.600 room with postnatal depression. I just had my first daughter, Harper, 0:19:05.280 --> 0:19:10.560 and for the first time I was still as a jack. 0:19:10.640 --> 0:19:12.800 I always kept myself super busy. I was doing all 0:19:12.800 --> 0:19:14.960 my hobbies and all the things and all the careers. 0:19:14.960 --> 0:19:18.399 And then of course once you have a baby, you 0:19:18.440 --> 0:19:23.199 are forced to stop and sometimes it can make you, 0:19:23.200 --> 0:19:27.000 you know, reflect and realize a lot of things. And 0:19:27.040 --> 0:19:30.600 for me, it took me about probably two weeks pro 0:19:30.680 --> 0:19:33.960