1 00:00:02,400 --> 00:00:04,160 Speaker 1: A team. It's Harps. Who else would it be. I 2 00:00:04,240 --> 00:00:07,880 Speaker 1: hope you're bloody terrific. So I've been reading the book, 3 00:00:07,920 --> 00:00:12,920 Speaker 1: which I've spoken about once, I think, or twice maybe recently. Anyway, 4 00:00:13,160 --> 00:00:16,360 Speaker 1: I'm not selling the book, and it might seem like 5 00:00:16,360 --> 00:00:19,120 Speaker 1: I'm about to open the religion door. I'm just opening 6 00:00:19,160 --> 00:00:22,640 Speaker 1: the thinking door. So anyway, the book is called unfollow 7 00:00:22,920 --> 00:00:28,080 Speaker 1: by a lady named Megan Phelps Roper. I don't have 8 00:00:28,120 --> 00:00:29,600 Speaker 1: it in front of me. I'm sure that's her name, 9 00:00:30,280 --> 00:00:33,159 Speaker 1: and she was a member of the very famous, slash 10 00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:38,840 Speaker 1: infamous Westboro Baptist Church from the States that did all 11 00:00:38,920 --> 00:00:44,840 Speaker 1: kinds of very very controversial things and continue, I think 12 00:00:44,880 --> 00:00:49,120 Speaker 1: to do very controversial things, allegedly in the name of God, 13 00:00:49,159 --> 00:00:55,040 Speaker 1: and then allegedly under the banner of scripture and biblical 14 00:00:55,080 --> 00:00:58,680 Speaker 1: teachings that they interpret a certain way. Anyway, not about that. 15 00:00:58,760 --> 00:01:01,600 Speaker 1: It's about the fact that she now, having grown up 16 00:01:01,600 --> 00:01:04,640 Speaker 1: in that church, having grown up in that echo chamber 17 00:01:04,720 --> 00:01:08,520 Speaker 1: of thought and behavior and philosophy and ideology and theology, 18 00:01:09,040 --> 00:01:17,679 Speaker 1: having been completely programmed and completely indoctrinated, with no access 19 00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:22,559 Speaker 1: really to know external influences in the way that most 20 00:01:22,600 --> 00:01:27,800 Speaker 1: of us would have she left the church. She left 21 00:01:27,800 --> 00:01:30,400 Speaker 1: the church, and it's it's a much, much, much, much 22 00:01:30,400 --> 00:01:33,880 Speaker 1: bigger conversation than that. But in reading this book and 23 00:01:34,120 --> 00:01:36,360 Speaker 1: or listening to this book, I should say, on audible 24 00:01:36,480 --> 00:01:42,840 Speaker 1: and hearing her journey, about her journey, and not just 25 00:01:42,959 --> 00:01:47,080 Speaker 1: the not just from the you know, the practical getting 26 00:01:47,120 --> 00:01:49,040 Speaker 1: out of the church, which was a bit of a nightmare, 27 00:01:49,080 --> 00:01:54,560 Speaker 1: and all of the sociological, emotional, practical complications and issues 28 00:01:54,600 --> 00:01:58,600 Speaker 1: and challenges that came with that, but just listening to 29 00:01:58,720 --> 00:02:04,040 Speaker 1: her reflect about the way that she believed certain things, 30 00:02:04,080 --> 00:02:06,960 Speaker 1: and the way that she saw the world, and the 31 00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:12,200 Speaker 1: way that she understood how life worked and other people worked, 32 00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:17,680 Speaker 1: and how much she was convinced that everyone in the 33 00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:20,520 Speaker 1: world except the people the eighty or so people in 34 00:02:20,560 --> 00:02:25,040 Speaker 1: her church, were wrong, were destined for an eternal damn 35 00:02:25,160 --> 00:02:27,920 Speaker 1: nation were you know? And so on and so on. 36 00:02:28,080 --> 00:02:30,320 Speaker 1: And I know too those of you who've never been 37 00:02:30,320 --> 00:02:33,280 Speaker 1: to church and never been religious, this would seem like 38 00:02:33,400 --> 00:02:36,799 Speaker 1: crazy town, and I get it. But the truth is, 39 00:02:36,840 --> 00:02:40,400 Speaker 1: for these people, and for people like Megan who grew 40 00:02:40,520 --> 00:02:43,560 Speaker 1: up in this, they don't know any different, they don't 41 00:02:43,639 --> 00:02:47,920 Speaker 1: know any better, and they truly believe, albeit misplaced albeit flawed, 42 00:02:48,680 --> 00:02:52,440 Speaker 1: they truly believe what they are doing and saying. And anyway, 43 00:02:53,919 --> 00:02:56,760 Speaker 1: so and I grew up not in that level of 44 00:02:57,639 --> 00:03:02,359 Speaker 1: you know, kind of religious idiocracy, but you know, at 45 00:03:02,440 --> 00:03:06,440 Speaker 1: times not that far away. And so for me there 46 00:03:06,480 --> 00:03:09,240 Speaker 1: was a lot of familiarity and a lot of curiosity, 47 00:03:09,240 --> 00:03:12,400 Speaker 1: and a lot of kind of light bulb moments. But 48 00:03:12,639 --> 00:03:16,520 Speaker 1: just listening to her talk about how she extricated herself 49 00:03:16,520 --> 00:03:21,280 Speaker 1: from that environment, from that situation, from that culture, from 50 00:03:21,320 --> 00:03:26,320 Speaker 1: that thinking, from that conditioning, from that pressure, the immense, 51 00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:31,680 Speaker 1: the immense pressure and expectation to comply and conform in 52 00:03:31,720 --> 00:03:36,080 Speaker 1: a line and be this soldier of God, in this 53 00:03:36,400 --> 00:03:41,240 Speaker 1: army of God against the evil that exists outside the 54 00:03:41,280 --> 00:03:45,840 Speaker 1: walls of the Westboro Baptist Church and fucking fascinating, you know. 55 00:03:45,960 --> 00:03:51,280 Speaker 1: But what interests me, you know, zooming out from the 56 00:03:51,320 --> 00:03:54,160 Speaker 1: micro of Megan's story and zooming out to the macro 57 00:03:54,320 --> 00:03:55,840 Speaker 1: of you and me and the rest of us who 58 00:03:55,920 --> 00:03:59,280 Speaker 1: all think, who all have beliefs, Not saying she didn't think, 59 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:01,600 Speaker 1: but the rest of us, who you know, we all 60 00:04:01,640 --> 00:04:04,120 Speaker 1: have thoughts, we all have ideas, we all have beliefs, 61 00:04:04,160 --> 00:04:08,160 Speaker 1: we all have values, we all see the world in 62 00:04:08,200 --> 00:04:11,240 Speaker 1: a certain way. We all see ourselves in the world, 63 00:04:11,320 --> 00:04:15,040 Speaker 1: a certain way. We all look at everything, every situation, 64 00:04:15,440 --> 00:04:20,120 Speaker 1: every newspaper article, every story on TV, every event that 65 00:04:20,240 --> 00:04:23,680 Speaker 1: unfolds in three D before our eyes. We all look 66 00:04:23,720 --> 00:04:27,719 Speaker 1: at that stuff, process that stuff, understand that stuff through 67 00:04:27,960 --> 00:04:35,719 Speaker 1: our own window of understanding, our own filter. But the 68 00:04:35,800 --> 00:04:39,760 Speaker 1: truth is that we don't often see the filter. We 69 00:04:39,800 --> 00:04:45,280 Speaker 1: don't even recognize that we're looking at a version of 70 00:04:45,320 --> 00:04:48,600 Speaker 1: what is in front of us, our version. So there's 71 00:04:48,640 --> 00:04:52,320 Speaker 1: the thing that's going on. There's the event, the situation, 72 00:04:52,520 --> 00:04:56,400 Speaker 1: the person, the conversation, the result, the outcome, the number, 73 00:04:57,240 --> 00:05:01,720 Speaker 1: the problem, the whatever it is. And then there's the 74 00:05:01,839 --> 00:05:05,400 Speaker 1: lens through which you look at that process at understand it. 75 00:05:05,520 --> 00:05:08,560 Speaker 1: Then there's me over here with my lens and my 76 00:05:08,760 --> 00:05:11,920 Speaker 1: understanding and my interpretation. Then there's Bob over there, and 77 00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:15,360 Speaker 1: Sally over there, and then there's John over there and whatever. 78 00:05:15,520 --> 00:05:17,599 Speaker 1: And so now we've got four or five six people 79 00:05:17,640 --> 00:05:21,320 Speaker 1: looking at the same thing, the same event, the same outcome, 80 00:05:21,400 --> 00:05:24,760 Speaker 1: the same number, the same painting on the wall, the 81 00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:28,560 Speaker 1: same whatever, and none of us are having an identical 82 00:05:28,640 --> 00:05:35,360 Speaker 1: experience around that. Because we create our own experiences, and 83 00:05:35,400 --> 00:05:39,120 Speaker 1: in part our experiences are a byproduct of our genetic disposition. 84 00:05:39,880 --> 00:05:45,560 Speaker 1: But we now know with some level of confidence, through 85 00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:50,000 Speaker 1: neuroscience and neuropsychology and psychology in general and research, we 86 00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:51,920 Speaker 1: now know that a lot of who we are and 87 00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:55,440 Speaker 1: how we are, and how we experience the world, and 88 00:05:55,480 --> 00:05:58,560 Speaker 1: how we think and how we frame things, and how 89 00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:01,320 Speaker 1: we tell our cell story and what we agree or 90 00:06:01,360 --> 00:06:05,120 Speaker 1: disagree with and why we get offended or don't get offended. 91 00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:07,560 Speaker 1: We know that a huge amount of that is about 92 00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:13,279 Speaker 1: our programming, is about our experiences, is about what we've 93 00:06:13,320 --> 00:06:16,320 Speaker 1: been through, what we've been taught and told and trained 94 00:06:17,240 --> 00:06:23,320 Speaker 1: to believe or to think or to do. And I'm 95 00:06:23,360 --> 00:06:26,600 Speaker 1: fascinated with this because when I'm talking to a person, 96 00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:29,719 Speaker 1: i'm talking to you know, if I'm talking to a 97 00:06:29,760 --> 00:06:33,000 Speaker 1: forty year old, I'm talking to forty years of experiences 98 00:06:33,040 --> 00:06:37,400 Speaker 1: and programming and beliefs and conditioning and culture and perhaps 99 00:06:37,440 --> 00:06:42,240 Speaker 1: theology and philosophy. And I'm talking to the totality of 100 00:06:42,279 --> 00:06:46,359 Speaker 1: that person's experiences, not just to the person in the 101 00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:49,880 Speaker 1: middle of it all. And I'm fascinated with that bit 102 00:06:50,960 --> 00:06:55,240 Speaker 1: who's in the middle of it all? If I can 103 00:06:55,400 --> 00:07:02,840 Speaker 1: separate Craig Harper from Craig Harper's conditioning programming, Who's Craig Harper? 104 00:07:04,960 --> 00:07:08,320 Speaker 1: And of course it and me are intertwined. But my 105 00:07:08,520 --> 00:07:15,040 Speaker 1: fascination is around who I might be, or who I am, 106 00:07:15,360 --> 00:07:20,960 Speaker 1: or who I could become in spite of my programming, 107 00:07:21,160 --> 00:07:24,880 Speaker 1: or beyond my programming, or beyond the beliefs that I 108 00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:30,600 Speaker 1: have that I didn't choose. So this episode is just 109 00:07:30,680 --> 00:07:33,920 Speaker 1: me thinking out loud about this stuff. I truly think 110 00:07:33,960 --> 00:07:39,480 Speaker 1: that most of us don't think outside of our own 111 00:07:39,520 --> 00:07:44,560 Speaker 1: little kind of echo chamber too often. So this is 112 00:07:44,600 --> 00:07:51,120 Speaker 1: a monologue of reflection and contemplation and wondering and hopefully 113 00:07:52,040 --> 00:07:58,280 Speaker 1: self awareness. So I think it was Aristotle, although there's 114 00:07:58,320 --> 00:08:02,920 Speaker 1: been some debate whether it was Aristotle or Socrates. That 115 00:08:03,080 --> 00:08:05,360 Speaker 1: was one of those old dudes, one of those philosophers, 116 00:08:05,360 --> 00:08:09,440 Speaker 1: one of those stoics who said that to know thyself 117 00:08:09,520 --> 00:08:14,920 Speaker 1: is the beginning of wisdom? Like who or what is 118 00:08:14,960 --> 00:08:19,440 Speaker 1: the self? Who or what is the self that exists 119 00:08:19,560 --> 00:08:26,160 Speaker 1: beyond my programming? Who or what is the self that 120 00:08:26,360 --> 00:08:30,520 Speaker 1: exists beyond my journey and my experiences and my schooling 121 00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:35,960 Speaker 1: and my church and my exposure to media and social media. 122 00:08:36,040 --> 00:08:40,880 Speaker 1: Where is Craig beyond all of that? Like who am 123 00:08:40,920 --> 00:08:47,319 Speaker 1: I without stuff? Without all that stuff? And if I'm 124 00:08:47,520 --> 00:08:50,560 Speaker 1: more than an idea, which we all kind of agree on, 125 00:08:50,640 --> 00:08:53,760 Speaker 1: I think if I'm more than an idea, if I'm 126 00:08:53,840 --> 00:08:56,480 Speaker 1: more than a belief or a shape or a size, 127 00:08:57,640 --> 00:09:00,280 Speaker 1: or a brand or an achievement, if I'm more than 128 00:09:00,320 --> 00:09:06,280 Speaker 1: a number or a bank balance, then where am I? 129 00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:11,840 Speaker 1: What am I? Who am I? Where can I be found? 130 00:09:11,920 --> 00:09:15,760 Speaker 1: Beyond all that? If we take away my appearance and 131 00:09:15,800 --> 00:09:19,480 Speaker 1: my brand and my podcast and all of the things 132 00:09:19,480 --> 00:09:22,040 Speaker 1: that I am known for, or all of the ways 133 00:09:22,040 --> 00:09:27,120 Speaker 1: that people can recognize me, what's left? Where? Or what 134 00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:33,520 Speaker 1: is my identity? Trying to figure out who we are 135 00:09:33,679 --> 00:09:39,400 Speaker 1: beyond all the stuff that we're not, Like if I did, 136 00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:42,360 Speaker 1: if I were, if my mind, if my emotions, if 137 00:09:42,440 --> 00:09:47,520 Speaker 1: my creativity and my curiosity was a clean slate, if 138 00:09:47,520 --> 00:09:52,040 Speaker 1: it was a blank canvas, Like who would I be? 139 00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:57,720 Speaker 1: If I was the same person genetically and my mom 140 00:09:57,760 --> 00:10:03,440 Speaker 1: and dad were the same people genetically, that is the 141 00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:06,240 Speaker 1: same body, born with the same body, the same genetics, 142 00:10:06,240 --> 00:10:11,400 Speaker 1: the same nervous system, heart, lungs, the same brain. But 143 00:10:11,520 --> 00:10:15,080 Speaker 1: I grew up in a Buddhist environment. I would have 144 00:10:15,080 --> 00:10:19,520 Speaker 1: been a Buddhist. I would have had Buddhist beliefs, I 145 00:10:19,520 --> 00:10:23,400 Speaker 1: would have more than likely been a vegan. And if 146 00:10:23,600 --> 00:10:27,880 Speaker 1: Ron and Mary had have moved to I don't know. 147 00:10:28,000 --> 00:10:31,800 Speaker 1: Let's say India. Let's say mum. Let's say Dad moved 148 00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:34,520 Speaker 1: there and Mum went and they moved there to. But 149 00:10:34,480 --> 00:10:36,960 Speaker 1: I don't I set up a business or run a 150 00:10:37,040 --> 00:10:40,680 Speaker 1: charity or do something when I was one year old 151 00:10:40,720 --> 00:10:43,040 Speaker 1: and then I grew up. I was born here, but 152 00:10:43,120 --> 00:10:47,280 Speaker 1: I grew up there, and I'd spent fifty nine of 153 00:10:47,320 --> 00:10:50,600 Speaker 1: the last sixty years in India. There's a fair chance 154 00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:55,319 Speaker 1: I might be a vegetarian Hindu. There's a fair chance 155 00:10:55,400 --> 00:10:58,440 Speaker 1: that I would see the world despite the fact that 156 00:10:58,520 --> 00:11:01,480 Speaker 1: I had the same brain and the same genetics, if 157 00:11:01,520 --> 00:11:07,200 Speaker 1: I grew up in a totally different sociological, cultural, behavioral, 158 00:11:07,360 --> 00:11:14,360 Speaker 1: religious environments, I wouldn't be me, or I'd be a 159 00:11:14,360 --> 00:11:23,439 Speaker 1: different me. Like did I choose? Did I choose my worldview? 160 00:11:24,120 --> 00:11:28,160 Speaker 1: Did I choose my beliefs, my opinions, my faith, my ideology, 161 00:11:28,720 --> 00:11:31,080 Speaker 1: or was it chosen for me? I think about this 162 00:11:31,400 --> 00:11:35,040 Speaker 1: a lot, like I think about whether or not I 163 00:11:35,280 --> 00:11:41,360 Speaker 1: simply clothed myself in the psychological, emotional, religious, sociological, and 164 00:11:41,440 --> 00:11:47,160 Speaker 1: behavioral wardrobe of my parents, like, how can you not? 165 00:11:47,320 --> 00:11:51,360 Speaker 1: And I'm not saying, by the way, that all of 166 00:11:51,400 --> 00:11:55,760 Speaker 1: these influences and all of this programming and conditioning and 167 00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:59,600 Speaker 1: education was bad. I'm not saying any of it's bad. 168 00:11:59,679 --> 00:12:02,439 Speaker 1: Maybe you grew up in a beautiful family with beautiful 169 00:12:02,559 --> 00:12:07,480 Speaker 1: environ and beautiful Maybe it's all good. Maybe it's all amazing. Nonetheless, 170 00:12:08,800 --> 00:12:12,199 Speaker 1: I think it's still good to think about where does 171 00:12:12,240 --> 00:12:15,760 Speaker 1: that start finish? And where do I start? Where do 172 00:12:15,880 --> 00:12:18,960 Speaker 1: these ideas of mine come from? Are these my ideas 173 00:12:19,040 --> 00:12:21,760 Speaker 1: or are these Dad's ideas that I've just adopted because 174 00:12:22,320 --> 00:12:25,360 Speaker 1: I trust Dad, I look up to Dad. I think 175 00:12:25,520 --> 00:12:29,840 Speaker 1: Dad's right. Where did my beliefs come from? Did I 176 00:12:29,920 --> 00:12:33,360 Speaker 1: choose these beliefs or are these beliefs a byproduct of 177 00:12:33,480 --> 00:12:37,440 Speaker 1: growing up in this particular environment, surrounded by these people 178 00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:42,520 Speaker 1: who adhere to this protocol and this belief system and 179 00:12:44,280 --> 00:12:54,880 Speaker 1: who don't open any other doors of possibility. What if 180 00:12:54,920 --> 00:13:00,440 Speaker 1: I was taught evolution from birth, not creation, for example, 181 00:13:00,600 --> 00:13:04,160 Speaker 1: creation being the Bible story, then there's a fair chance 182 00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:09,920 Speaker 1: that I would have been either agnostic or atheist, or 183 00:13:09,960 --> 00:13:13,360 Speaker 1: at the very least I would have believed in evolution. 184 00:13:15,520 --> 00:13:19,360 Speaker 1: I would think a certain way about certain things, And 185 00:13:19,360 --> 00:13:25,720 Speaker 1: what if I had sixty years of diverse, different, totally 186 00:13:25,840 --> 00:13:35,040 Speaker 1: different experiences, situations, encounters, exposure to different ideas and different 187 00:13:35,120 --> 00:13:40,240 Speaker 1: people in different environments. Who would I be? Then? I 188 00:13:40,280 --> 00:13:44,920 Speaker 1: don't necessarily think better or worse. I'm just curious think 189 00:13:44,920 --> 00:13:49,040 Speaker 1: about how many of us are trapped in essentially a 190 00:13:49,160 --> 00:13:55,839 Speaker 1: psychological or emotional and or behavioral prison because of our 191 00:13:55,880 --> 00:14:00,840 Speaker 1: self limiting thinking, because of the beliefs about ourselves that 192 00:14:00,920 --> 00:14:05,520 Speaker 1: we didn't choose. And it might be that we grew 193 00:14:05,600 --> 00:14:09,760 Speaker 1: up in an ideological echo chamber that we weren't allowed 194 00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:13,680 Speaker 1: to question and we couldn't escape. Or it might be 195 00:14:13,840 --> 00:14:16,840 Speaker 1: that we grew up around people who told us what 196 00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:21,080 Speaker 1: we couldn't do and how stupid or ugly or how 197 00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:26,080 Speaker 1: much potential we lacked. Or maybe the opposite, maybe we 198 00:14:26,120 --> 00:14:29,400 Speaker 1: grew up with beautiful, amazing people who encouraged and supported. 199 00:14:31,520 --> 00:14:36,000 Speaker 1: Either way, you know we're a byproduct of that. Either way, 200 00:14:36,400 --> 00:14:40,840 Speaker 1: it's good to think about where did their beliefs stop 201 00:14:40,960 --> 00:14:43,880 Speaker 1: and where do my start mine start, and where did 202 00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:47,640 Speaker 1: they come from? Did I choose them or did I 203 00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:52,800 Speaker 1: adopt them? As just an unconscious byproduct of just being 204 00:14:53,080 --> 00:14:57,680 Speaker 1: in the proximity of that belief system or that ideology 205 00:14:57,760 --> 00:15:00,840 Speaker 1: or that culture. What what if instead growing up in 206 00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:04,800 Speaker 1: you know, a small country town, What if I grew 207 00:15:04,880 --> 00:15:08,520 Speaker 1: up on a remote farm in the middle of nowhere 208 00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:12,520 Speaker 1: where our neighbors were twenty kilometers away? What if that, 209 00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:15,800 Speaker 1: or what if I the same dude grew up in 210 00:15:15,840 --> 00:15:19,120 Speaker 1: a city skyscraper in the middle of New York, or 211 00:15:19,160 --> 00:15:23,360 Speaker 1: in a cult or in a traveling circus. Who would 212 00:15:23,400 --> 00:15:27,520 Speaker 1: I be and how would I be? What is the 213 00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:31,240 Speaker 1: stuff that I drag around with me that doesn't work? 214 00:15:32,080 --> 00:15:36,280 Speaker 1: What is the belief that I have? What is the 215 00:15:36,480 --> 00:15:39,720 Speaker 1: idea that I have? What is the fear that I 216 00:15:39,880 --> 00:15:47,200 Speaker 1: have that is a prison to my potential and my possibilities? 217 00:15:48,960 --> 00:15:51,560 Speaker 1: What's the thing that I believe that that really makes 218 00:15:51,640 --> 00:16:01,400 Speaker 1: no sense? I think the challenge is not too not 219 00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:09,960 Speaker 1: to upend our lives, but to recognize the unconsciousness of 220 00:16:11,640 --> 00:16:15,200 Speaker 1: our existence. And maybe this is not used, so discard this, 221 00:16:16,080 --> 00:16:18,680 Speaker 1: but how much we do so many things on a 222 00:16:18,760 --> 00:16:24,080 Speaker 1: version of autopilot, this unconscious kind of groundhog danus of 223 00:16:24,160 --> 00:16:28,560 Speaker 1: doing things with you know, in relationships, with money, in 224 00:16:28,680 --> 00:16:35,320 Speaker 1: business in Korea, with food, with God, with habits and 225 00:16:35,360 --> 00:16:40,680 Speaker 1: behaviors that don't serve us, that don't work with outcomes 226 00:16:40,720 --> 00:16:45,480 Speaker 1: that we consistently produce, which are at odds with our 227 00:16:45,520 --> 00:16:49,000 Speaker 1: alleged values. What are my values? Where did they come from? 228 00:16:50,600 --> 00:16:54,520 Speaker 1: Why do I say that that these things are my values? 229 00:16:54,560 --> 00:16:57,200 Speaker 1: They're important to me? But I behave in a way 230 00:16:57,680 --> 00:17:03,080 Speaker 1: that demonstrates the opposite consistently While saying that health, physical 231 00:17:03,160 --> 00:17:06,720 Speaker 1: health is important to me, I consistently do things to 232 00:17:06,840 --> 00:17:09,880 Speaker 1: sabotage my own health. What is that about? Where does 233 00:17:09,880 --> 00:17:14,240 Speaker 1: that habit, that behavior, Where does that rationalizing mindset come from? 234 00:17:14,320 --> 00:17:20,879 Speaker 1: When will I change? You and I are both a 235 00:17:20,960 --> 00:17:27,320 Speaker 1: byproduct of our unique journey, unique to you and me anyway, 236 00:17:28,440 --> 00:17:33,360 Speaker 1: And that's not good or bad. That's human. I think 237 00:17:33,400 --> 00:17:37,679 Speaker 1: the question The question is maybe, or one of the 238 00:17:37,760 --> 00:17:40,919 Speaker 1: questions is what are the what are the beliefs and 239 00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:46,400 Speaker 1: ideas and habits and behaviors that are an unconscious byproduct 240 00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:51,160 Speaker 1: of my journey? And which of those should I challenge 241 00:17:51,760 --> 00:17:58,520 Speaker 1: or dive into or poken prod or maybe even discard? 242 00:18:00,960 --> 00:18:06,480 Speaker 1: Like what if I what if I was brave enough 243 00:18:06,520 --> 00:18:08,679 Speaker 1: to say that this thing that I've thought for a 244 00:18:08,680 --> 00:18:13,280 Speaker 1: long time could be wrong? You know, This is one 245 00:18:13,320 --> 00:18:16,680 Speaker 1: of the one of the challenges of having and I'm 246 00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:20,200 Speaker 1: not saying obviously, I'm just talking as a general concept here, 247 00:18:21,080 --> 00:18:24,440 Speaker 1: but when we have ideas and beliefs that are very concrete, 248 00:18:25,880 --> 00:18:29,719 Speaker 1: and I've had very concrete beliefs in the past about 249 00:18:29,840 --> 00:18:34,000 Speaker 1: things that if I'm being a bit brave and a 250 00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:36,879 Speaker 1: bit honest and a bit authentic and a bit vulnerable, 251 00:18:37,359 --> 00:18:41,919 Speaker 1: I had concrete beliefs, unequivocal, I wouldn't be open to 252 00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:44,879 Speaker 1: anything else. You can't talk to me about it. I 253 00:18:44,920 --> 00:18:51,240 Speaker 1: absolutely know I am right, when in fact I really 254 00:18:51,280 --> 00:18:54,480 Speaker 1: had no evidence. So I just had belief. I just 255 00:18:54,560 --> 00:18:58,440 Speaker 1: had faith. I had no proof. But I was unteachable, 256 00:18:58,520 --> 00:19:02,560 Speaker 1: I was untrainable, I was arrogant, I was self righteous. 257 00:19:02,680 --> 00:19:06,280 Speaker 1: I knew that I knew, but deep deep down I 258 00:19:06,359 --> 00:19:08,520 Speaker 1: knew that I didn't know, deep deep down. I was 259 00:19:08,560 --> 00:19:12,720 Speaker 1: fucking terrified of questioning this thing that I've thought, that 260 00:19:12,760 --> 00:19:17,560 Speaker 1: I've believed, this ideology that I've inhabited, and not necessarily 261 00:19:17,600 --> 00:19:19,639 Speaker 1: a religious one. The idea might be that one of 262 00:19:19,640 --> 00:19:22,359 Speaker 1: my ideologies or one of my ideas was I'm not 263 00:19:22,560 --> 00:19:26,000 Speaker 1: smart enough to go to university, I'm not smart enough 264 00:19:26,040 --> 00:19:28,040 Speaker 1: to do this, to do that I don't have the 265 00:19:28,119 --> 00:19:32,480 Speaker 1: genetics that could create this or that outcome. And I 266 00:19:32,600 --> 00:19:41,040 Speaker 1: spent so long basically trapped in a m a prison 267 00:19:41,400 --> 00:19:46,400 Speaker 1: of my own making, where my potential wasn't the problem, 268 00:19:46,640 --> 00:19:51,960 Speaker 1: but my thinking about my potential. My genetics, albeit they 269 00:19:51,960 --> 00:19:57,080 Speaker 1: weren't amazing, they're fine, but my thinking about my genetics, 270 00:19:58,040 --> 00:20:01,639 Speaker 1: my thinking about my intellect, to my thinking about my 271 00:20:01,880 --> 00:20:06,880 Speaker 1: future self, my inability or my lack of willingness perhaps 272 00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:12,240 Speaker 1: to question people and to question ideas and to question 273 00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:16,560 Speaker 1: beliefs that I was very comfortable with. And I was 274 00:20:16,720 --> 00:20:21,040 Speaker 1: only comfortable with them because they had been so intertwined 275 00:20:21,119 --> 00:20:27,120 Speaker 1: with my life. I wasn't comfortable because they were necessarily correct. 276 00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:31,240 Speaker 1: I was comfortable with them because they were very, very 277 00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:35,960 Speaker 1: very familiar to me. They were very familiar to me. 278 00:20:38,880 --> 00:20:42,399 Speaker 1: And it's interesting when I listened to Megan Phelps Roper 279 00:20:42,560 --> 00:20:46,400 Speaker 1: talk in this book Unfollow about, you know, her journey 280 00:20:46,480 --> 00:20:50,679 Speaker 1: out of this ideology, this cult, have thought, this religious cult. 281 00:20:50,720 --> 00:20:54,760 Speaker 1: But and then she she would think something, and then 282 00:20:54,840 --> 00:20:57,560 Speaker 1: all of a sudden a scripture, a verse from the 283 00:20:57,560 --> 00:21:00,520 Speaker 1: Bible would come to her mind to under mind that 284 00:21:00,640 --> 00:21:04,240 Speaker 1: thought that she had, where she would start to question 285 00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:06,840 Speaker 1: something then a scripture would come to mind, which would 286 00:21:06,880 --> 00:21:10,520 Speaker 1: basically tell her that she shouldn't think, that she shouldn't 287 00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:14,760 Speaker 1: trust herself, that she was nothing and that God was everything, 288 00:21:14,800 --> 00:21:18,119 Speaker 1: and that she basically was worthless in all of this stuff. 289 00:21:18,119 --> 00:21:22,800 Speaker 1: And it's so easy for us to self sabotage. It's 290 00:21:22,800 --> 00:21:26,159 Speaker 1: so easy for us to live in fear. It's so 291 00:21:26,480 --> 00:21:30,679 Speaker 1: easy for us to not question who we could be, 292 00:21:31,240 --> 00:21:35,040 Speaker 1: what we could do, Who might I become if I 293 00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:40,440 Speaker 1: would try, if I would realize and recognize with courage, 294 00:21:40,480 --> 00:21:44,400 Speaker 1: that maybe some of the things that I think, maybe 295 00:21:44,440 --> 00:21:47,800 Speaker 1: some of my ideas, maybe some of the beliefs that 296 00:21:47,840 --> 00:21:53,800 Speaker 1: have been intertwined with my identity for decades, maybe they're 297 00:21:53,800 --> 00:22:00,160 Speaker 1: not true. And that's terrifying. That's terrifying because you're your 298 00:22:00,200 --> 00:22:04,240 Speaker 1: sense of self is tied into that belief, and if 299 00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:07,320 Speaker 1: that belief is wrong, I don't know who I am anymore. 300 00:22:08,760 --> 00:22:12,160 Speaker 1: But the truth is, if the belief is wrong anyway, 301 00:22:13,080 --> 00:22:15,320 Speaker 1: you don't know who you are. You just have a 302 00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:21,000 Speaker 1: story that you believe. So who would you be if 303 00:22:21,040 --> 00:22:24,359 Speaker 1: you had a different life, And who would you be 304 00:22:27,440 --> 00:22:31,320 Speaker 1: if you started to open that door of awareness and curiosity. 305 00:22:32,960 --> 00:22:37,680 Speaker 1: As I've said before on this show. Consciousness starts when 306 00:22:37,760 --> 00:22:44,480 Speaker 1: we recognize our lack of consciousness. Real self awareness begins 307 00:22:44,560 --> 00:22:53,440 Speaker 1: to unfold when we realize how unaware we've been. See 308 00:22:53,520 --> 00:22:54,000 Speaker 1: Next Time.