1 00:00:05,881 --> 00:00:13,201 Speaker 1: Apodje Production. Welcome to the She Rises Podcast. I'm Ashi 2 00:00:13,281 --> 00:00:16,601 Speaker 1: and I'm Tiana. This podcast is about female empowerment and 3 00:00:16,681 --> 00:00:19,721 Speaker 1: encouraging you to be your biggest, boldest, and most authentic 4 00:00:19,921 --> 00:00:22,640 Speaker 1: version of yourself. We'd help you shed the shame, grow 5 00:00:22,681 --> 00:00:24,800 Speaker 1: to a new level. We're gonna laugh, cry, and talk 6 00:00:24,841 --> 00:00:27,801 Speaker 1: about the topics everyone else is too afraid to talk about. 7 00:00:28,401 --> 00:00:31,721 Speaker 1: Get ready for your next level of self. Welcome back 8 00:00:31,721 --> 00:00:34,441 Speaker 1: to another episode of She Rises. I am your host Tiana, 9 00:00:34,441 --> 00:00:36,161 Speaker 1: and I have a very special guest with me today 10 00:00:36,361 --> 00:00:39,201 Speaker 1: and he is the man, the myth, the legend behind 11 00:00:39,200 --> 00:00:41,401 Speaker 1: ashe Ynes, which is Steve Evans. Thank you so much 12 00:00:41,400 --> 00:00:42,561 Speaker 1: for coming and joining us today. 13 00:00:42,601 --> 00:00:43,400 Speaker 2: Thank you for having me. 14 00:00:43,521 --> 00:00:46,601 Speaker 1: Oh, it's an absolute pleasure. Our audience have been dying 15 00:00:46,641 --> 00:00:48,480 Speaker 1: to know the behind the scenes of what it's like 16 00:00:48,561 --> 00:00:50,441 Speaker 1: to live with Ashy, breathe with ashally, do all the 17 00:00:50,441 --> 00:00:51,201 Speaker 1: things behind. 18 00:00:50,921 --> 00:00:51,601 Speaker 2: The scenes trying. 19 00:00:53,441 --> 00:00:56,961 Speaker 1: So I've heard she said you involuntarily just like was like, yep, 20 00:00:57,001 --> 00:00:57,560 Speaker 1: I'm ready to go. 21 00:00:57,601 --> 00:00:59,481 Speaker 2: Today's there's something called me. I don't know. I just 22 00:00:59,481 --> 00:01:00,041 Speaker 2: felt ready. 23 00:01:00,121 --> 00:01:02,641 Speaker 1: Yeah. I love that. Love that. Well, let's get into it, 24 00:01:02,641 --> 00:01:02,921 Speaker 1: shall we. 25 00:01:03,200 --> 00:01:03,641 Speaker 2: Let's do it? 26 00:01:03,681 --> 00:01:05,321 Speaker 1: How does it feel sharing your wife with me. 27 00:01:05,521 --> 00:01:09,001 Speaker 2: It's definitely like that sometimes. But you know what, I 28 00:01:09,041 --> 00:01:12,441 Speaker 2: am just so grateful she met you because your friendship 29 00:01:12,481 --> 00:01:15,840 Speaker 2: has been it's just so beautiful to watch. It really 30 00:01:15,881 --> 00:01:18,321 Speaker 2: brings a lot to her. So I'm really thankful for that. 31 00:01:18,481 --> 00:01:21,721 Speaker 2: Oh that's so beautiful, even though sometimes I wanted to myself. 32 00:01:21,601 --> 00:01:23,840 Speaker 1: Yeah, you're like all right, so yeah that's enough. 33 00:01:24,121 --> 00:01:26,961 Speaker 2: But there's also sometimes where it's like I can do 34 00:01:27,081 --> 00:01:28,920 Speaker 2: my own thing because I know you've got it covered. 35 00:01:29,200 --> 00:01:32,121 Speaker 2: You have such similar interests, so yeah, it's beautiful. 36 00:01:32,161 --> 00:01:35,121 Speaker 1: Yeah, similar personalities, very similar, same wounds as well. 37 00:01:35,241 --> 00:01:36,601 Speaker 2: Yeah, beautiful to watch. 38 00:01:36,920 --> 00:01:38,601 Speaker 1: I love that. Like you guys have been together for 39 00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:40,720 Speaker 1: seventeen years. I say this to Ashley all the time. 40 00:01:41,041 --> 00:01:43,280 Speaker 1: I look at both of your relationship and I am 41 00:01:43,321 --> 00:01:46,481 Speaker 1: so inspired by it because it's very rare and it's 42 00:01:46,521 --> 00:01:49,721 Speaker 1: not very common that you see people who genuinely get 43 00:01:49,721 --> 00:01:52,401 Speaker 1: better with time. You know, a lot of relationships, you know, 44 00:01:52,481 --> 00:01:54,561 Speaker 1: you hear, Yes, I've been together with them for like 45 00:01:54,601 --> 00:01:56,961 Speaker 1: the length of time, but it doesn't really mean anything 46 00:01:56,961 --> 00:01:59,241 Speaker 1: when they are resentful and don't like each other and 47 00:01:59,481 --> 00:02:02,361 Speaker 1: get along or they're not intimate anymore. And so yeah, 48 00:02:02,361 --> 00:02:04,041 Speaker 1: I would love to know, and I'm sure everyone here 49 00:02:04,081 --> 00:02:06,241 Speaker 1: would love to know, Like, how has that been for 50 00:02:06,281 --> 00:02:09,001 Speaker 1: you in your relationship and how have you been able 51 00:02:09,001 --> 00:02:12,481 Speaker 1: to build what you have together with ashually over seventeen years. 52 00:02:12,561 --> 00:02:15,321 Speaker 2: Yeah, good question. I guess you're totally right. I guess 53 00:02:15,321 --> 00:02:19,240 Speaker 2: we're really committed to always growing together and there has 54 00:02:19,281 --> 00:02:21,840 Speaker 2: been moments in the relationship where one person grows more 55 00:02:21,881 --> 00:02:25,441 Speaker 2: than the other and we generally always have our best 56 00:02:25,441 --> 00:02:28,841 Speaker 2: interests in heart and because we're always growing together, it 57 00:02:28,921 --> 00:02:31,561 Speaker 2: seems to work. And you know, she's the first one 58 00:02:31,601 --> 00:02:33,841 Speaker 2: to say that, you know, there's been challenging times in 59 00:02:33,841 --> 00:02:36,161 Speaker 2: our relationship and I could say the same, but we 60 00:02:36,281 --> 00:02:39,121 Speaker 2: always whether it's getting help you know, you're asking for 61 00:02:39,201 --> 00:02:42,081 Speaker 2: advice off a counselor or if we had some great 62 00:02:42,121 --> 00:02:45,441 Speaker 2: mentors over the years, which I can highly recommend, because 63 00:02:45,641 --> 00:02:47,240 Speaker 2: sometimes you just need that third person. 64 00:02:47,321 --> 00:02:48,401 Speaker 1: Yeah, the mediator, the. 65 00:02:48,321 --> 00:02:51,281 Speaker 2: Mediator and when you're in a fight. I mean that's 66 00:02:51,361 --> 00:02:55,361 Speaker 2: the breakdown to most relationships once the connection's gone in 67 00:02:55,641 --> 00:02:57,321 Speaker 2: what is it the loopy of resentment? 68 00:02:57,481 --> 00:02:58,840 Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, I. 69 00:02:58,761 --> 00:03:00,680 Speaker 2: Feel we get in front of it before it gets 70 00:03:00,721 --> 00:03:03,321 Speaker 2: the resentment. We put a hand up if we can't 71 00:03:03,361 --> 00:03:06,001 Speaker 2: resolve it. Yeah, some of those sessions are great for 72 00:03:06,041 --> 00:03:08,841 Speaker 2: me to be able to express in a language that 73 00:03:08,881 --> 00:03:11,641 Speaker 2: she might understand, or vice versa. I'd put it down 74 00:03:11,721 --> 00:03:15,321 Speaker 2: to always being transparent and open in how we're feeling 75 00:03:15,321 --> 00:03:18,001 Speaker 2: at any one time, and then also getting the right 76 00:03:18,041 --> 00:03:19,921 Speaker 2: advice to love that for sure. 77 00:03:20,081 --> 00:03:21,721 Speaker 1: I think sometimes I mean, I don't know because I 78 00:03:21,721 --> 00:03:23,680 Speaker 1: haven't been in a seventeen year long relationship, but. 79 00:03:23,680 --> 00:03:25,601 Speaker 2: To your longest relationship, oh. 80 00:03:25,401 --> 00:03:27,840 Speaker 1: Like three and a half years, Yeah, it's not very long. 81 00:03:27,960 --> 00:03:28,840 Speaker 1: I've got lots to learn. 82 00:03:28,881 --> 00:03:31,681 Speaker 2: I always say three years though, is that barrier said that? 83 00:03:31,761 --> 00:03:32,800 Speaker 1: Isn't it like three seven? 84 00:03:32,921 --> 00:03:33,441 Speaker 2: Three seven? 85 00:03:33,520 --> 00:03:36,841 Speaker 1: I think people get stuck maybe in long term relationships 86 00:03:36,881 --> 00:03:39,880 Speaker 1: where when it comes to having a mediator or having 87 00:03:39,961 --> 00:03:42,321 Speaker 1: somebody come in for help, it's almost like all a 88 00:03:42,321 --> 00:03:44,761 Speaker 1: bit of ego. Likely yeah one a third person coming in, 89 00:03:44,881 --> 00:03:45,681 Speaker 1: or we can do it at bit. 90 00:03:45,881 --> 00:03:48,041 Speaker 2: You share their fights. You know they can be petty, 91 00:03:48,121 --> 00:03:50,961 Speaker 2: or you've done something wrong or some shame around it. 92 00:03:51,241 --> 00:03:53,001 Speaker 1: I could totally get that, and then having to own 93 00:03:53,041 --> 00:03:54,441 Speaker 1: it as well. It would be hard, like when that 94 00:03:54,441 --> 00:03:56,001 Speaker 1: person is sitting in front of you saying like, hey, 95 00:03:56,001 --> 00:03:57,441 Speaker 1: you've got to look at this deeper. You're like, well, 96 00:03:57,441 --> 00:03:59,681 Speaker 1: well whoa Yes, yeah. 97 00:03:59,521 --> 00:04:02,761 Speaker 2: That's sometimes it's really uncomfortable, but it's getting back to connection. 98 00:04:02,881 --> 00:04:05,601 Speaker 2: Come from a place of understanding, commune dicating in a 99 00:04:05,641 --> 00:04:10,401 Speaker 2: way that's helpful. Sometimes you try to communicate, but it 100 00:04:10,401 --> 00:04:12,440 Speaker 2: doesn't always come out the way you want it. Yeah, 101 00:04:12,641 --> 00:04:16,281 Speaker 2: and you've got the masculine feminine dynamic as well. You know, 102 00:04:16,281 --> 00:04:17,361 Speaker 2: there's so many layers to it. 103 00:04:17,441 --> 00:04:20,961 Speaker 1: Something I've seen that you both do is just observation 104 00:04:21,081 --> 00:04:22,721 Speaker 1: over the time that I've known you both, is that 105 00:04:22,801 --> 00:04:25,841 Speaker 1: you both are willing to try new things. Yes, like 106 00:04:26,041 --> 00:04:28,961 Speaker 1: within your relationship, within other areas of your life, and 107 00:04:29,281 --> 00:04:31,801 Speaker 1: how I've seen you guys maneuver some things and challenges 108 00:04:31,841 --> 00:04:34,681 Speaker 1: that you've been through. You're always willing to learn and grow. 109 00:04:34,880 --> 00:04:36,760 Speaker 1: And I think that is a huge thing that a 110 00:04:36,761 --> 00:04:39,281 Speaker 1: lot of people and people in long term relationships could 111 00:04:39,320 --> 00:04:39,640 Speaker 1: take on. 112 00:04:40,001 --> 00:04:43,441 Speaker 2: I think in relay some relationships it can be only 113 00:04:43,481 --> 00:04:46,080 Speaker 2: one person who's like that, yeah, and that causes a 114 00:04:46,121 --> 00:04:47,001 Speaker 2: lot of problems. 115 00:04:47,041 --> 00:04:48,921 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like one person is willing to grow with 116 00:04:48,961 --> 00:04:49,440 Speaker 1: the other person. 117 00:04:49,601 --> 00:04:51,681 Speaker 2: Yeah, yep. And you can see how that would get 118 00:04:51,721 --> 00:04:56,281 Speaker 2: stagnant and that would cause disconnection or growing apart. It's 119 00:04:56,440 --> 00:04:58,320 Speaker 2: probably a better language that people understand. 120 00:04:58,361 --> 00:05:00,481 Speaker 1: Yeah, Like it puts a wedge in between them. It's like, oh, well, 121 00:05:00,481 --> 00:05:02,961 Speaker 1: this person's now resentful because you don't want to grow 122 00:05:03,041 --> 00:05:03,801 Speaker 1: and your vice versa. 123 00:05:03,921 --> 00:05:06,200 Speaker 2: And they might put up pulling them down to or 124 00:05:06,241 --> 00:05:08,281 Speaker 2: instead of trying to reach up with them, they start 125 00:05:08,320 --> 00:05:08,881 Speaker 2: pulling them down. 126 00:05:08,921 --> 00:05:10,681 Speaker 1: And then coming back to that communication thing, like not 127 00:05:10,761 --> 00:05:12,561 Speaker 1: knowing how to communicate what it is they want to 128 00:05:12,601 --> 00:05:15,121 Speaker 1: get across them, and then it like making them butt heads. 129 00:05:15,241 --> 00:05:17,721 Speaker 2: Yeah. One thing I love about Ash she's very forward 130 00:05:17,761 --> 00:05:21,081 Speaker 2: and what she wants. Yeah, she knows what, communicates the 131 00:05:21,161 --> 00:05:25,640 Speaker 2: boundaries effortlessly. She also enforces those boundaries as well, like 132 00:05:25,880 --> 00:05:28,361 Speaker 2: I always know where I stand, and it's not like 133 00:05:28,401 --> 00:05:30,601 Speaker 2: I don't have my own right or my own voice 134 00:05:30,641 --> 00:05:33,161 Speaker 2: to be able to communicate mine as well. But she 135 00:05:33,320 --> 00:05:35,961 Speaker 2: leads a lot with that. I do respect it a lot. 136 00:05:36,041 --> 00:05:37,921 Speaker 1: Yeah, of course. This is a conversation we had the 137 00:05:37,921 --> 00:05:41,161 Speaker 1: other day actually about how when either person in a 138 00:05:41,201 --> 00:05:43,921 Speaker 1: relationship has a strength, why would we not want to 139 00:05:44,001 --> 00:05:45,961 Speaker 1: lead our partner in that. Yeah, you know, sometimes it's like, 140 00:05:46,001 --> 00:05:47,561 Speaker 1: oh I wish they could do it on their own accord, 141 00:05:47,561 --> 00:05:49,320 Speaker 1: but sometimes they don't have the tools or the know 142 00:05:49,401 --> 00:05:51,801 Speaker 1: how or maybe they're a little bit scared, and then 143 00:05:51,801 --> 00:05:53,520 Speaker 1: being able to lead them in that is like, well, 144 00:05:53,561 --> 00:05:55,601 Speaker 1: I love this person, why would I not want to 145 00:05:55,761 --> 00:05:57,481 Speaker 1: bring them with me on the journey? 146 00:05:57,681 --> 00:05:57,880 Speaker 2: You know. 147 00:05:57,880 --> 00:05:59,841 Speaker 1: It's like, you know, areas you might have strengths, they 148 00:05:59,921 --> 00:06:02,481 Speaker 1: might be Ashy's weaknesses, where as she has strengths and 149 00:06:02,601 --> 00:06:04,601 Speaker 1: vice versa. You know, so it's like you come together 150 00:06:04,641 --> 00:06:06,401 Speaker 1: and you can grow on the path together. 151 00:06:06,561 --> 00:06:08,561 Speaker 2: We have a lot of clarity like that, where her 152 00:06:08,601 --> 00:06:10,320 Speaker 2: strengths and my weaknesses my weaknesses. 153 00:06:10,320 --> 00:06:14,041 Speaker 1: Absolutely, I would love to know what do you feel 154 00:06:14,041 --> 00:06:16,921 Speaker 1: has been over the last seventeen years the biggest lesson 155 00:06:16,961 --> 00:06:19,401 Speaker 1: that you have learned with Ashy in your relationship. 156 00:06:19,961 --> 00:06:22,361 Speaker 2: The thing that I've struggled the most was is alcohol 157 00:06:22,401 --> 00:06:25,320 Speaker 2: and our relationship. But I had so much conditioning growing 158 00:06:25,361 --> 00:06:28,001 Speaker 2: up about it was needed in my life, you know, 159 00:06:28,081 --> 00:06:34,321 Speaker 2: like whether it's social interactions or connecting with peers, overcoming anxiety, 160 00:06:34,921 --> 00:06:37,080 Speaker 2: all those things, and she's really taught me that that's 161 00:06:37,281 --> 00:06:39,561 Speaker 2: not needed. And since I have given up drinking, it's 162 00:06:39,601 --> 00:06:41,440 Speaker 2: been the best thing ever. I owe her that in 163 00:06:41,481 --> 00:06:44,601 Speaker 2: our relationship. It really didn't work for our relationship, but 164 00:06:44,641 --> 00:06:46,241 Speaker 2: it didn't work for me either, And I was always 165 00:06:46,281 --> 00:06:48,481 Speaker 2: fighting that it was just a relationship thing, but it's 166 00:06:48,561 --> 00:06:51,121 Speaker 2: really a life thing and that personal thing. 167 00:06:51,401 --> 00:06:53,321 Speaker 1: Yeah, so it was like not just within the relationship 168 00:06:53,320 --> 00:06:56,281 Speaker 1: it doesn't work, but in every other every other world. Yeah, 169 00:06:56,320 --> 00:06:58,201 Speaker 1: I hate that. I think a lot of people use 170 00:06:58,241 --> 00:06:59,841 Speaker 1: alcohol as a clutch, and I don't know if that 171 00:06:59,841 --> 00:07:01,520 Speaker 1: has been your experience, I definitely was mine. 172 00:07:02,001 --> 00:07:02,960 Speaker 2: There's times for sure. 173 00:07:03,121 --> 00:07:05,361 Speaker 1: Yeah. I think it's easy to fall into that with 174 00:07:05,401 --> 00:07:07,521 Speaker 1: alcohol as well, and it could be such a slippery slope. 175 00:07:07,601 --> 00:07:09,361 Speaker 1: It's cool that you guys have been able to navigate 176 00:07:09,361 --> 00:07:11,481 Speaker 1: that together and over the years of kind of like 177 00:07:11,561 --> 00:07:14,321 Speaker 1: learn what works your relationship and then like what parts like, 178 00:07:14,321 --> 00:07:15,921 Speaker 1: oh maybe we can like go without and we can 179 00:07:16,001 --> 00:07:18,241 Speaker 1: leave this behind. Yes, you know, but it's like I 180 00:07:18,281 --> 00:07:19,921 Speaker 1: can see that both of you are willing in that, 181 00:07:20,201 --> 00:07:22,081 Speaker 1: and it does take two people being willing to be 182 00:07:22,161 --> 00:07:24,201 Speaker 1: able to move together on that journey. 183 00:07:24,241 --> 00:07:24,521 Speaker 2: For sure. 184 00:07:24,601 --> 00:07:27,921 Speaker 1: She's beautiful. Is there this specific lesson that you have 185 00:07:28,081 --> 00:07:31,720 Speaker 1: learned because of ashi, like something that she has taught 186 00:07:31,761 --> 00:07:33,481 Speaker 1: you in the time that you've been together. 187 00:07:34,241 --> 00:07:38,001 Speaker 2: I really value how beautiful a friend she is. Yeah, 188 00:07:38,041 --> 00:07:40,921 Speaker 2: And it just kills me sometimes it's seen as opposite, 189 00:07:40,961 --> 00:07:42,761 Speaker 2: but how beautiful a friend she is to the others. 190 00:07:42,801 --> 00:07:44,601 Speaker 2: It's so inspiring to look at. 191 00:07:44,801 --> 00:07:46,561 Speaker 1: Yeah, and on the receiving end of that, I can 192 00:07:46,561 --> 00:07:47,761 Speaker 1: one hundred percent vouch for that. 193 00:07:47,841 --> 00:07:51,321 Speaker 2: She's so giving, so selfless. She's always the first person 194 00:07:51,361 --> 00:07:54,561 Speaker 2: to bring a birthday cake or organize something for your birthday, 195 00:07:54,641 --> 00:07:55,761 Speaker 2: and I just love that about her. 196 00:07:55,921 --> 00:07:57,721 Speaker 1: Yeah, she'd literally give you the shirt off her back 197 00:07:57,721 --> 00:07:59,401 Speaker 1: if she had nothing, for sure. And that's the kind 198 00:07:59,401 --> 00:08:00,761 Speaker 1: of friend that she is. If there was kind of 199 00:08:00,841 --> 00:08:02,641 Speaker 1: like one thing that you wish people in the public 200 00:08:02,641 --> 00:08:05,641 Speaker 1: eye who didn't know Ash personally, would you say that 201 00:08:05,641 --> 00:08:07,041 Speaker 1: that's the thing that you would want them to know. 202 00:08:07,841 --> 00:08:11,241 Speaker 2: Yeah, she's perceived otherwise in some areas those who really know. 203 00:08:11,481 --> 00:08:12,601 Speaker 2: I don't think that, but. 204 00:08:12,681 --> 00:08:14,881 Speaker 1: Definitely, especially because it is more of a common thing 205 00:08:14,921 --> 00:08:16,801 Speaker 1: for her to get a little bit of backlash and 206 00:08:16,881 --> 00:08:19,761 Speaker 1: questioning and hate and all that sort of stuff for. 207 00:08:19,801 --> 00:08:22,161 Speaker 2: Because she can't. Yeah, she can't tell her side of 208 00:08:22,201 --> 00:08:24,321 Speaker 2: the story most of the time. From choice. Yeah, it's 209 00:08:24,321 --> 00:08:25,201 Speaker 2: a value of hers. 210 00:08:25,321 --> 00:08:27,841 Speaker 1: Yeah, she chooses not to chooses not to Sometimes that's 211 00:08:27,881 --> 00:08:29,281 Speaker 1: perceived as being in the wrong. 212 00:08:29,361 --> 00:08:29,961 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's right. 213 00:08:30,081 --> 00:08:31,641 Speaker 1: Like, oh, I'm going to be silent, and people can 214 00:08:31,641 --> 00:08:34,161 Speaker 1: make up their narrative because she's not on the forefront, 215 00:08:34,161 --> 00:08:36,841 Speaker 1: like defending herself or defending her name, and then people 216 00:08:36,841 --> 00:08:38,361 Speaker 1: can run wild with the stories that. 217 00:08:38,281 --> 00:08:41,081 Speaker 2: They're Yeah, that's the hardest thing is watching it from behind. 218 00:08:41,081 --> 00:08:44,201 Speaker 2: But we've all got her back behind the scenes, you know. Yeah, 219 00:08:44,321 --> 00:08:46,481 Speaker 2: and she's got so many beautiful people around her that 220 00:08:46,841 --> 00:08:48,761 Speaker 2: love her and value her. Yeah. 221 00:08:48,801 --> 00:08:51,841 Speaker 1: Absolutely. I want to come back to the question about 222 00:08:51,881 --> 00:08:55,041 Speaker 1: alcohol and a little bit more about like your relationship. 223 00:08:55,481 --> 00:08:58,841 Speaker 1: If you could share with everyone, maybe like one small 224 00:08:58,841 --> 00:09:00,641 Speaker 1: thing or one thing that has been like the hardest 225 00:09:00,681 --> 00:09:03,401 Speaker 1: challenge that you've had to overcome with Ashley in your relationship, 226 00:09:03,401 --> 00:09:04,481 Speaker 1: would you say that it was alcohol? 227 00:09:04,601 --> 00:09:09,321 Speaker 2: Yeah, Yeah, definitely, And just the challenges of navigating life, 228 00:09:09,441 --> 00:09:12,881 Speaker 2: you know, running multiple businesses, kids, you know, the extra 229 00:09:12,921 --> 00:09:15,121 Speaker 2: dynamic of social media and the things that was a 230 00:09:15,161 --> 00:09:19,361 Speaker 2: lot to handle professionally and as a couple individually as well, so. 231 00:09:19,441 --> 00:09:22,081 Speaker 1: Coming into the public eye and having to deal with 232 00:09:22,121 --> 00:09:25,201 Speaker 1: all the backlash all that attacks on like your relationship 233 00:09:25,241 --> 00:09:27,041 Speaker 1: and things. Yeah, I could imagine. 234 00:09:26,641 --> 00:09:30,161 Speaker 2: Yep, for sure, but personally in an intimate level, it's 235 00:09:30,201 --> 00:09:32,201 Speaker 2: definitely alcohol that affected the most. 236 00:09:32,281 --> 00:09:35,521 Speaker 1: Yeah, out of curiosity. Do you think the online stuff 237 00:09:35,561 --> 00:09:38,241 Speaker 1: do you think that that impacted your relationship in a 238 00:09:38,281 --> 00:09:39,801 Speaker 1: negative way or do you feel like that kind of 239 00:09:39,841 --> 00:09:40,801 Speaker 1: bonded you guys together. 240 00:09:40,801 --> 00:09:43,601 Speaker 2: I think we bonded from it. We always grow stronger 241 00:09:43,761 --> 00:09:45,961 Speaker 2: in those situations. We're a really good team like that. 242 00:09:46,001 --> 00:09:47,201 Speaker 2: We support each other really well. 243 00:09:47,241 --> 00:09:49,201 Speaker 1: Yeah, it was like you guys coming together and being like, wow, 244 00:09:49,241 --> 00:09:51,361 Speaker 1: there's like an attack on the outside. We're going to 245 00:09:51,441 --> 00:09:54,921 Speaker 1: like bond even move together. So I could imagine how easy, 246 00:09:55,281 --> 00:09:56,801 Speaker 1: like I've seen it, I've seen you have seen it, 247 00:09:56,961 --> 00:09:59,201 Speaker 1: very small snippet of it, and I just it blows 248 00:09:59,241 --> 00:10:01,921 Speaker 1: my mind with what some people say, and because I 249 00:10:02,001 --> 00:10:03,881 Speaker 1: know it so far from the truth, it doesn't make 250 00:10:03,921 --> 00:10:05,881 Speaker 1: sense in my head that people say something when you. 251 00:10:05,841 --> 00:10:07,921 Speaker 2: First experienced it, But once you've been through it a 252 00:10:07,921 --> 00:10:10,801 Speaker 2: few times, it's kind of like a reaper. It does happen, Yeah, 253 00:10:10,921 --> 00:10:11,241 Speaker 2: a lot. 254 00:10:11,321 --> 00:10:12,601 Speaker 1: I guess you just deal with it and you move 255 00:10:12,601 --> 00:10:13,681 Speaker 1: on with it, and you let it go and don't 256 00:10:13,721 --> 00:10:14,441 Speaker 1: let it impact you. 257 00:10:14,601 --> 00:10:18,681 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's just I wouldn't say compartmentalize, but create a 258 00:10:18,681 --> 00:10:19,681 Speaker 2: different meaning on it. 259 00:10:19,921 --> 00:10:20,481 Speaker 1: Yeah. 260 00:10:20,521 --> 00:10:23,721 Speaker 2: And the beautiful thing of always say is how close 261 00:10:23,761 --> 00:10:26,881 Speaker 2: it makes us all behind it together so beautiful. Yeah, 262 00:10:26,921 --> 00:10:28,721 Speaker 2: so that's what I really focus on all the time. 263 00:10:28,801 --> 00:10:30,481 Speaker 1: Yeah, you can turn something that's so negative and like 264 00:10:30,481 --> 00:10:32,801 Speaker 1: flip it into it like you alchemize it. Yes, you 265 00:10:32,921 --> 00:10:36,841 Speaker 1: transmute that shit energy into like something bring beautiful. It 266 00:10:36,921 --> 00:10:38,561 Speaker 1: makes you guys stronger and you guys win in the 267 00:10:38,601 --> 00:10:41,001 Speaker 1: end because of it. For somebody in the public eye 268 00:10:41,001 --> 00:10:43,441 Speaker 1: actually has like a lot of shit. Yeah, is it 269 00:10:43,441 --> 00:10:45,801 Speaker 1: interesting to you to find that she's on one hand, 270 00:10:45,881 --> 00:10:49,521 Speaker 1: wildly criticized and then absolutely. 271 00:10:48,961 --> 00:10:53,401 Speaker 2: Adored, Yes, one hundred percent. But the more time goes on, 272 00:10:53,761 --> 00:10:56,601 Speaker 2: I mean, we were at the very forefront of social media, 273 00:10:56,761 --> 00:10:58,441 Speaker 2: like ash was one of the first ones with the 274 00:10:58,441 --> 00:11:01,841 Speaker 2: big following and rode that wave, and at the start 275 00:11:01,881 --> 00:11:05,121 Speaker 2: we didn't really understand it, the polarity of love hate it. 276 00:11:05,681 --> 00:11:09,201 Speaker 2: But the more we go into this phase of evolution 277 00:11:09,281 --> 00:11:12,201 Speaker 2: of life and society of social media, you can see 278 00:11:12,241 --> 00:11:15,721 Speaker 2: it's a normal pattern of people, Like people are messy 279 00:11:15,801 --> 00:11:18,681 Speaker 2: and judging and you just got to look around. Who 280 00:11:18,761 --> 00:11:21,961 Speaker 2: hasn't copped to get ratioed on Twitter or you know, 281 00:11:22,001 --> 00:11:24,881 Speaker 2: there's so many examples of it. So that's my meaning 282 00:11:24,921 --> 00:11:27,881 Speaker 2: on it because I know Ashley firsthand. Yeah, what a 283 00:11:27,881 --> 00:11:28,801 Speaker 2: beautiful person she is. 284 00:11:28,881 --> 00:11:30,481 Speaker 1: Yeah, you're like that stuff doesn't even touch the sides 285 00:11:30,521 --> 00:11:32,001 Speaker 1: because you're like, I'm the one who spends the most 286 00:11:32,041 --> 00:11:33,841 Speaker 1: time with you. I know who you are in and out. 287 00:11:33,921 --> 00:11:35,441 Speaker 1: I have no question in my mind about who you 288 00:11:35,481 --> 00:11:36,121 Speaker 1: are as a person. 289 00:11:36,201 --> 00:11:38,281 Speaker 2: Yeah, so then I just have to turn my gaze 290 00:11:38,281 --> 00:11:40,441 Speaker 2: over and see it happening to others and I can 291 00:11:40,481 --> 00:11:42,921 Speaker 2: come from a place of understanding. Oh is that true. 292 00:11:43,001 --> 00:11:43,601 Speaker 2: It's probably not. 293 00:11:43,841 --> 00:11:47,561 Speaker 1: Yeah. Even the way that people pedestal people to tear 294 00:11:47,561 --> 00:11:49,521 Speaker 1: them down on social media, it's like they put them 295 00:11:49,601 --> 00:11:51,641 Speaker 1: up so high that there have to be this complete 296 00:11:51,921 --> 00:11:54,921 Speaker 1: superhuman person who never makes mistakes, is not allowed to 297 00:11:54,921 --> 00:11:57,201 Speaker 1: fuck up in anyone and then born the moment you 298 00:11:57,241 --> 00:11:58,681 Speaker 1: do something wrong, they pay you down. 299 00:11:58,881 --> 00:11:59,121 Speaker 2: Yeah. 300 00:11:59,161 --> 00:12:00,321 Speaker 1: It's such an interesting thing. 301 00:12:00,521 --> 00:12:02,561 Speaker 2: Racially in Australia, Like it's crazy. 302 00:12:02,601 --> 00:12:04,281 Speaker 1: And even to be able to like hold them through that, 303 00:12:04,801 --> 00:12:07,201 Speaker 1: there have been moments where you felt a little bit helpless. 304 00:12:06,801 --> 00:12:10,041 Speaker 2: In that heaps. Yeah, but I always try to make 305 00:12:10,081 --> 00:12:12,441 Speaker 2: her stronger and she has. I'm so proud of the 306 00:12:12,441 --> 00:12:15,521 Speaker 2: way she is. She's come so far and she's only 307 00:12:15,561 --> 00:12:17,961 Speaker 2: going to get better, you know, the more the growth 308 00:12:18,001 --> 00:12:20,281 Speaker 2: through it. And I have a belief that there's a 309 00:12:20,281 --> 00:12:22,841 Speaker 2: gift in every challenge, and everything happens for a reason. 310 00:12:23,041 --> 00:12:24,961 Speaker 2: Life happens for you, not too you know, there's so 311 00:12:24,961 --> 00:12:28,481 Speaker 2: many beautiful meanings you can put around things, and in hindsight, 312 00:12:28,601 --> 00:12:30,801 Speaker 2: I have so much evidence of that's so true. Any 313 00:12:30,841 --> 00:12:32,761 Speaker 2: future things that happen, I have that around it. 314 00:12:32,841 --> 00:12:34,801 Speaker 1: Yeah, like you have trust in her ability and the 315 00:12:34,841 --> 00:12:36,921 Speaker 1: ability to move through and navigate it together. 316 00:12:38,241 --> 00:12:41,081 Speaker 2: But the biggest evolution me and how I hold that 317 00:12:41,241 --> 00:12:44,041 Speaker 2: is don't try to fix it, hold some space for 318 00:12:44,081 --> 00:12:46,561 Speaker 2: her to feel it and go through it. Try to 319 00:12:47,041 --> 00:12:49,521 Speaker 2: come in and save the day, save the day. And 320 00:12:49,641 --> 00:12:51,601 Speaker 2: young Steve would have done that, but I'm a bit 321 00:12:51,601 --> 00:12:53,641 Speaker 2: wiser and older those things. 322 00:12:53,721 --> 00:12:56,201 Speaker 1: Yeah, not your first rodeo, Not my first rodeo. No. 323 00:12:56,521 --> 00:12:58,041 Speaker 1: I feel like there's been a lot of changes over 324 00:12:58,041 --> 00:13:00,721 Speaker 1: the last twelve months. Especially there's been like the closer 325 00:13:00,761 --> 00:13:04,641 Speaker 1: baseline as she had her aneurysm, she had her brain surgeries. 326 00:13:05,201 --> 00:13:08,001 Speaker 1: What has that been like for you witnessing the change 327 00:13:08,001 --> 00:13:09,761 Speaker 1: over the last twelve months, Because I feel like she's 328 00:13:09,801 --> 00:13:13,161 Speaker 1: just collapsed time and just evolved into a brand new person. 329 00:13:13,601 --> 00:13:18,081 Speaker 2: I've really had a really strong belief that this is 330 00:13:18,121 --> 00:13:20,841 Speaker 2: a really transformative time for both of us. And I 331 00:13:20,881 --> 00:13:23,841 Speaker 2: thought this at the very start of all this, even 332 00:13:23,841 --> 00:13:27,641 Speaker 2: though there's been some uncertainty and some challenging times, I 333 00:13:27,681 --> 00:13:31,121 Speaker 2: see it now, I really do. She's thriving at the moment. Yeah, 334 00:13:31,561 --> 00:13:35,001 Speaker 2: whether it's in her relationships or her work. You know, 335 00:13:35,081 --> 00:13:38,001 Speaker 2: sometimes you've got to make those tough calls. I know, Baseline, 336 00:13:38,041 --> 00:13:40,041 Speaker 2: that was her baby. You know, she loved it. And 337 00:13:40,081 --> 00:13:43,681 Speaker 2: from my side, I hated running two businesses. I only 338 00:13:43,721 --> 00:13:45,841 Speaker 2: got so much to give, so much to put out 339 00:13:45,881 --> 00:13:47,761 Speaker 2: and I couldn't do it. That was such a big 340 00:13:47,801 --> 00:13:49,521 Speaker 2: shift for her, Like it was a start. And even 341 00:13:49,521 --> 00:13:51,001 Speaker 2: though it was like at the time it was such 342 00:13:51,001 --> 00:13:56,601 Speaker 2: a traumatic and you know, like so many layers to it, change, change, shame. 343 00:13:56,801 --> 00:13:59,681 Speaker 1: Not knowing how people in the audience would all of it. 344 00:13:59,481 --> 00:14:01,161 Speaker 2: But I knew it was going to be the best 345 00:14:01,161 --> 00:14:03,841 Speaker 2: thing ever. And it is, like, you know, she's absolutely 346 00:14:03,841 --> 00:14:06,561 Speaker 2: loving what she's doing right now and in so many 347 00:14:06,601 --> 00:14:10,001 Speaker 2: different ways. Personally, from my side, it's like Hardaway has 348 00:14:10,001 --> 00:14:12,161 Speaker 2: been booming since too, because I've been able to put 349 00:14:12,161 --> 00:14:15,321 Speaker 2: my energy and focus into one thing. Yeah, aligned team, 350 00:14:15,481 --> 00:14:16,721 Speaker 2: and yeah, it's been good. 351 00:14:16,841 --> 00:14:18,721 Speaker 1: That's so good. Honestly, I can see it for you, guys. 352 00:14:18,721 --> 00:14:20,801 Speaker 1: I feel like you guys have just continuously gotten better 353 00:14:20,841 --> 00:14:23,521 Speaker 1: and better with like every aspect of your relationship and 354 00:14:23,681 --> 00:14:25,681 Speaker 1: every area of life as well. You're sure. And I 355 00:14:25,681 --> 00:14:28,321 Speaker 1: feel like I've really seen ash since i've known her 356 00:14:28,361 --> 00:14:30,121 Speaker 1: at least, which hasn't been the longest time in the 357 00:14:30,121 --> 00:14:31,481 Speaker 1: grand scheme of things, but I feel like I've known 358 00:14:31,481 --> 00:14:34,441 Speaker 1: her my whole life and watching her grow from when 359 00:14:34,481 --> 00:14:37,001 Speaker 1: we met to now. She's really coming to her mind 360 00:14:37,321 --> 00:14:39,641 Speaker 1: growth so much. We talk about all the time, but 361 00:14:39,801 --> 00:14:42,401 Speaker 1: like this is the year of hard conversations, Yeah, really 362 00:14:42,401 --> 00:14:45,081 Speaker 1: facing them, being willing to like run ahead first at 363 00:14:45,121 --> 00:14:47,841 Speaker 1: them and not avoid anything that feels uncomfortable because you 364 00:14:47,921 --> 00:14:50,441 Speaker 1: collapse so much time when you do that. Because instead 365 00:14:50,441 --> 00:14:52,921 Speaker 1: of messing around for three months going oh should I 366 00:14:52,921 --> 00:14:55,321 Speaker 1: should I not? Or I don't want to have that conversation, 367 00:14:55,601 --> 00:14:57,721 Speaker 1: let's do it, let's do it, dive straight in and 368 00:14:57,761 --> 00:14:59,441 Speaker 1: then you're like cool, like we got that over and 369 00:14:59,481 --> 00:15:02,161 Speaker 1: done with one day. Yes, you know, And I've really 370 00:15:02,241 --> 00:15:06,121 Speaker 1: seen her just expand her level of communication and her 371 00:15:06,161 --> 00:15:08,801 Speaker 1: boldness and like really on her bigness because she is 372 00:15:08,801 --> 00:15:11,041 Speaker 1: a very big personality. Definitely but I feel like for 373 00:15:11,081 --> 00:15:12,601 Speaker 1: a little while there there was like a cap and 374 00:15:12,641 --> 00:15:15,641 Speaker 1: a little that you know, have you felt that change 375 00:15:15,681 --> 00:15:17,921 Speaker 1: that she's had and like obviously letting go a baseline 376 00:15:17,921 --> 00:15:20,881 Speaker 1: and also going through the traumatic experience as well aneurysms. 377 00:15:20,921 --> 00:15:24,401 Speaker 1: I know you've had aneurysms as well. Has that impacted 378 00:15:24,401 --> 00:15:25,961 Speaker 1: your relationship in a positive way? 379 00:15:26,121 --> 00:15:28,561 Speaker 2: Yeah? In that we've got each other's back, and I 380 00:15:28,561 --> 00:15:30,721 Speaker 2: guess it goes back to that other situation where we're 381 00:15:30,721 --> 00:15:33,921 Speaker 2: in a challenging situation comes we all pulled together, and 382 00:15:34,321 --> 00:15:36,641 Speaker 2: the aneurysm one is a little bit different than a 383 00:15:36,801 --> 00:15:41,841 Speaker 2: challenging work problem or social media. It's obviously nothing stirs 384 00:15:41,881 --> 00:15:43,681 Speaker 2: you up more than a bit of a health challenge, 385 00:15:43,681 --> 00:15:46,761 Speaker 2: you know, mortality, etc. I had a lot of experience 386 00:15:46,801 --> 00:15:48,321 Speaker 2: in it, so it was great that I could help 387 00:15:48,441 --> 00:15:51,681 Speaker 2: in that area. But she's also probably got a new 388 00:15:51,761 --> 00:15:53,801 Speaker 2: lease on life because of it too, if you come 389 00:15:53,841 --> 00:15:55,721 Speaker 2: back to the gifts in it, because there always is. 390 00:15:56,041 --> 00:15:57,921 Speaker 2: You can't go through something like that and not come 391 00:15:58,001 --> 00:16:00,281 Speaker 2: through and go, let's go after life, you. 392 00:16:00,241 --> 00:16:02,361 Speaker 1: Know, Yeah, Like what am I doing the choices that 393 00:16:02,401 --> 00:16:04,721 Speaker 1: I'm making? Aligned do I want to spend more time 394 00:16:04,761 --> 00:16:06,481 Speaker 1: with you even I feel like that's where her head 395 00:16:06,521 --> 00:16:09,121 Speaker 1: would have been out, Like what's important? What matters? How 396 00:16:09,161 --> 00:16:11,081 Speaker 1: can I spend more time doing that? I feel like 397 00:16:11,121 --> 00:16:12,001 Speaker 1: she did. 398 00:16:11,841 --> 00:16:14,201 Speaker 2: That and she is living it right now, so you 399 00:16:14,201 --> 00:16:16,001 Speaker 2: can thank the aneurism for that. 400 00:16:16,241 --> 00:16:18,601 Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like it's interesting. Hey, like life challenges. 401 00:16:18,961 --> 00:16:21,161 Speaker 1: Everyone always wants the good and the highs, but don't 402 00:16:21,201 --> 00:16:23,681 Speaker 1: realize that it comes with the heaviness. You know, the 403 00:16:23,721 --> 00:16:26,481 Speaker 1: holy shit moments that like completely rock you to your core. 404 00:16:27,081 --> 00:16:29,641 Speaker 1: You need that, like almost like my backs up against 405 00:16:29,681 --> 00:16:31,921 Speaker 1: a wall. Yes, before you can go okay, now I 406 00:16:31,961 --> 00:16:32,801 Speaker 1: can start moving up. 407 00:16:32,961 --> 00:16:35,641 Speaker 2: Yeah, life works in mysterious ways for sure. 408 00:16:36,081 --> 00:16:37,641 Speaker 1: As a team, right, you guys been doing this for 409 00:16:37,681 --> 00:16:41,121 Speaker 1: seventeen years. What is one piece of advice that you 410 00:16:41,161 --> 00:16:43,721 Speaker 1: could give the audience or anyone listening who aspires to 411 00:16:43,721 --> 00:16:46,561 Speaker 1: do what you guys have done in relationships? What is 412 00:16:46,601 --> 00:16:49,361 Speaker 1: it that you do as a team that helps you 413 00:16:49,401 --> 00:16:51,641 Speaker 1: continuously get better in your relationship. 414 00:16:51,761 --> 00:16:54,401 Speaker 2: I wouldn't say there's one thing, but you definitely need 415 00:16:54,961 --> 00:16:58,761 Speaker 2: to be committed to continuously evolve the relationship because it's 416 00:16:58,841 --> 00:17:03,881 Speaker 2: never the same, like it's always seasons, phases, all those 417 00:17:03,921 --> 00:17:06,361 Speaker 2: sort of things, and whether it's because you are a team, 418 00:17:06,361 --> 00:17:08,600 Speaker 2: You're not always going to be on the same level 419 00:17:08,801 --> 00:17:10,881 Speaker 2: as such. You know, there's been times where as she's 420 00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:12,761 Speaker 2: had to lift me up, there's been times we've had 421 00:17:12,761 --> 00:17:15,600 Speaker 2: to lift her up. But you're always committed to the 422 00:17:15,681 --> 00:17:18,520 Speaker 2: end result. And I think little things like you've got 423 00:17:18,561 --> 00:17:20,801 Speaker 2: to have common goals, you've got to have common a 424 00:17:20,921 --> 00:17:24,001 Speaker 2: vision for the future. We've got really clear visions for 425 00:17:24,080 --> 00:17:29,880 Speaker 2: our future. As she's a sagittarius, like she needs freedom 426 00:17:30,321 --> 00:17:32,801 Speaker 2: her other whole side of her that doesn't involve me, 427 00:17:32,840 --> 00:17:35,801 Speaker 2: and I've got to be supportive of that too. So 428 00:17:35,840 --> 00:17:38,681 Speaker 2: it comes back to you, you know, understanding each other's values. 429 00:17:39,001 --> 00:17:42,000 Speaker 2: My needs are your needs needs my needs and always 430 00:17:42,120 --> 00:17:44,521 Speaker 2: have that in mind. But then there's sometimes where one 431 00:17:44,561 --> 00:17:47,600 Speaker 2: person's needs is more important in the time that they're 432 00:17:47,640 --> 00:17:50,680 Speaker 2: going through, and so it's catching and passing as a dance. 433 00:17:50,880 --> 00:17:53,440 Speaker 2: And then when things do break down, because they always do, 434 00:17:53,600 --> 00:17:55,600 Speaker 2: give us the good stuff. When she's feeling something, she'll 435 00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:59,801 Speaker 2: say it and if we can't resolve it, then look 436 00:17:59,880 --> 00:18:02,200 Speaker 2: to get some help, but look to get a third 437 00:18:02,281 --> 00:18:04,920 Speaker 2: party to mediate because it can be fit. 438 00:18:05,441 --> 00:18:08,561 Speaker 1: Yeah, you say that adaptability is a huge thing in relationships. 439 00:18:08,600 --> 00:18:11,200 Speaker 1: When two people are growing, you evolve into different people, 440 00:18:11,441 --> 00:18:13,041 Speaker 1: you know, and when you go through a huge massive 441 00:18:13,120 --> 00:18:16,081 Speaker 1: change I imagine like being in a relationship for seventeen years, 442 00:18:16,080 --> 00:18:19,001 Speaker 1: you have to continuously reintroduce each other. Yeah, you know, 443 00:18:19,041 --> 00:18:20,761 Speaker 1: it's like, well, I've grown now, I'm not the person 444 00:18:20,801 --> 00:18:22,761 Speaker 1: that I was before. Now You've got to get to 445 00:18:22,761 --> 00:18:25,121 Speaker 1: know this new version of me and how I do 446 00:18:25,201 --> 00:18:26,721 Speaker 1: life and how I want to life. 447 00:18:26,721 --> 00:18:29,561 Speaker 2: And that's the challenging part of the dance. It's a dance, 448 00:18:29,640 --> 00:18:32,401 Speaker 2: and you've got to have a little bit of leeway 449 00:18:32,600 --> 00:18:36,360 Speaker 2: in allowing the readjustment of it. Being parents is probably 450 00:18:36,400 --> 00:18:39,920 Speaker 2: the hardest. Yeah, imagine, Yeah, I mean it's especially that 451 00:18:39,961 --> 00:18:42,321 Speaker 2: first year. It's such a shock to the system, like 452 00:18:42,840 --> 00:18:44,521 Speaker 2: individually and as a couple, throw. 453 00:18:44,360 --> 00:18:46,120 Speaker 1: As a spanner in the works in the dynamic, in 454 00:18:46,120 --> 00:18:47,001 Speaker 1: your relecto dynamic. 455 00:18:47,120 --> 00:18:50,401 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's not about you anymore. It's about them, time, freedom, 456 00:18:50,681 --> 00:18:52,200 Speaker 2: you know, all of it. But then you work it 457 00:18:52,241 --> 00:18:54,480 Speaker 2: out and become a team and then becomes beautiful. You know. 458 00:18:54,640 --> 00:18:56,281 Speaker 1: Was there anything that kind of helped you guys get 459 00:18:56,281 --> 00:18:59,080 Speaker 1: through that period when like you first had Taj, when 460 00:18:59,120 --> 00:19:00,561 Speaker 1: you were adjusting to that period. 461 00:19:00,681 --> 00:19:02,761 Speaker 2: I think that was one of our most challenging periods, 462 00:19:02,801 --> 00:19:04,761 Speaker 2: So we had a lot of other things going to 463 00:19:04,801 --> 00:19:08,801 Speaker 2: all once at that stage. So well, yeah, all that 464 00:19:09,001 --> 00:19:09,840 Speaker 2: was just happening. 465 00:19:09,921 --> 00:19:11,880 Speaker 1: Could imagine all hectic at once. 466 00:19:11,801 --> 00:19:13,081 Speaker 2: We did have exterior help. 467 00:19:13,281 --> 00:19:15,321 Speaker 1: Yeah, that would have been quite heavy obviously. You know 468 00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:18,200 Speaker 1: when moments like that happen in life and everything starts 469 00:19:18,241 --> 00:19:21,880 Speaker 1: to stack. Is there a trait or a behavior of 470 00:19:21,921 --> 00:19:25,041 Speaker 1: ashes that kind of like bothers you a bit? It's annoying. 471 00:19:26,160 --> 00:19:27,481 Speaker 2: She can definitely be annoying. 472 00:19:28,201 --> 00:19:29,281 Speaker 1: We can love her for it. 473 00:19:29,201 --> 00:19:32,801 Speaker 2: Sometimes on purpose, sometimes not. She's always got a limiting 474 00:19:32,840 --> 00:19:35,920 Speaker 2: belief like that she can't do something, so she just 475 00:19:35,921 --> 00:19:38,561 Speaker 2: gives up really easy on things I can't do it 476 00:19:38,721 --> 00:19:41,481 Speaker 2: or it's too hard or those sort of things. I've 477 00:19:41,521 --> 00:19:44,160 Speaker 2: been really good with her with that, because I'm usually 478 00:19:44,160 --> 00:19:47,961 Speaker 2: one that always tries. Even if I fail, it's okay, 479 00:19:48,201 --> 00:19:50,840 Speaker 2: go for it. I see her in the gym, I 480 00:19:50,880 --> 00:19:53,600 Speaker 2: see her carry weights she's thrown around. She's doing all 481 00:19:53,640 --> 00:19:57,880 Speaker 2: these clips and then two things. It's like she says, 482 00:19:57,880 --> 00:20:00,200 Speaker 2: it's too heavy to carry all the groceries in. But 483 00:20:00,241 --> 00:20:02,281 Speaker 2: it's such a feminine thing because she wants the man 484 00:20:02,360 --> 00:20:04,881 Speaker 2: to come and lift the things and she'll play like this, 485 00:20:05,080 --> 00:20:07,961 Speaker 2: I can't get my suitcase out of the car. Or 486 00:20:08,001 --> 00:20:11,120 Speaker 2: we'll go park at the supermarket and I'm always just 487 00:20:11,160 --> 00:20:12,801 Speaker 2: trying to get the easiest park because I don't want 488 00:20:12,840 --> 00:20:15,160 Speaker 2: to have to squeeze in, so I'll usually go a 489 00:20:15,201 --> 00:20:18,160 Speaker 2: little bit further but park with no one around. And 490 00:20:18,201 --> 00:20:21,081 Speaker 2: she'll always complain because she has to walk so far. 491 00:20:21,160 --> 00:20:23,681 Speaker 2: But in the morning she'll do like ten thousand steps. 492 00:20:23,961 --> 00:20:25,201 Speaker 2: She's always checking her watch. 493 00:20:25,360 --> 00:20:27,440 Speaker 1: Or you guys have a little bit of a challenge 494 00:20:27,481 --> 00:20:28,721 Speaker 1: going on out who can do the most steps. 495 00:20:28,801 --> 00:20:30,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, she's hard to beat, so. 496 00:20:30,640 --> 00:20:31,680 Speaker 1: She's very competitive. 497 00:20:31,761 --> 00:20:34,401 Speaker 2: Yeah, her best job doesn't help either. 498 00:20:34,561 --> 00:20:37,521 Speaker 1: Totally, totally. Yeah, no, that's so good. My annoying trade, 499 00:20:37,521 --> 00:20:39,041 Speaker 1: which is not an annoying trade at all. She's just 500 00:20:39,041 --> 00:20:40,200 Speaker 1: twenty minutes early to everything. 501 00:20:40,360 --> 00:20:42,321 Speaker 2: Yeah, I carry the same traits, like are you a 502 00:20:42,400 --> 00:20:42,920 Speaker 2: late person? 503 00:20:43,080 --> 00:20:45,321 Speaker 1: I'm just like bang on time and I can push 504 00:20:45,360 --> 00:20:46,761 Speaker 1: being late. I definitely can. 505 00:20:47,201 --> 00:20:49,321 Speaker 2: But you know when she said you're always a late person? 506 00:20:49,360 --> 00:20:52,281 Speaker 1: Oh shit, Yeah, I'm probably trying to make it more palatable. 507 00:20:52,360 --> 00:20:55,121 Speaker 1: But you know what, her doing that has actually taught 508 00:20:55,120 --> 00:20:57,321 Speaker 1: me how to be more on time, because every time 509 00:20:57,321 --> 00:20:59,281 Speaker 1: I think like, oh I only have X amount of time. 510 00:20:59,281 --> 00:21:00,961 Speaker 1: I'm like, no, I need double the amount of time. 511 00:21:01,001 --> 00:21:04,001 Speaker 1: I'm always pushing the limit of you know, so I'm like, yes, 512 00:21:04,281 --> 00:21:06,680 Speaker 1: I just know when she comes or she's coming to me, 513 00:21:06,840 --> 00:21:08,640 Speaker 1: I know, I've got to be twenty minutes early. So 514 00:21:08,681 --> 00:21:10,240 Speaker 1: then it's like teaching me I've got to be on 515 00:21:10,321 --> 00:21:12,321 Speaker 1: time or early. It's actually a really good trade. 516 00:21:12,360 --> 00:21:13,961 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a really good trade. 517 00:21:14,041 --> 00:21:16,081 Speaker 1: Yeah, no, not at all. There was recently something that 518 00:21:16,120 --> 00:21:18,600 Speaker 1: you guys didn't experience together as a couple actually, which 519 00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:19,360 Speaker 1: was the lap dance. 520 00:21:19,481 --> 00:21:21,161 Speaker 2: Oh okay, yeah, yeah that was fun. 521 00:21:21,281 --> 00:21:23,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, the lap dance, which was cool because it kind 522 00:21:23,160 --> 00:21:25,841 Speaker 1: of went semi viral. As an observer, it was really 523 00:21:25,840 --> 00:21:28,400 Speaker 1: beautiful to watch one. It was super empowering because I know, 524 00:21:28,801 --> 00:21:31,120 Speaker 1: as she's on a journey of like sexual embodiment, and 525 00:21:31,521 --> 00:21:33,920 Speaker 1: to witness you guys like watch the video like ten times, 526 00:21:33,961 --> 00:21:36,120 Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my god, this is so amazing because 527 00:21:36,160 --> 00:21:38,640 Speaker 1: you guys were so locked into each other and just 528 00:21:39,001 --> 00:21:40,920 Speaker 1: how locked in you were on her. You were just 529 00:21:41,041 --> 00:21:44,041 Speaker 1: absolutely just mesmerized by her. And there was a little 530 00:21:44,041 --> 00:21:46,241 Speaker 1: bit of backlash, you know, as things like this get 531 00:21:46,281 --> 00:21:49,600 Speaker 1: There was lots of support and also people making comments 532 00:21:49,600 --> 00:21:51,481 Speaker 1: about being like, oh, baby number three's on the way, 533 00:21:51,481 --> 00:21:52,921 Speaker 1: by the way that they were looking at each other. 534 00:21:53,201 --> 00:21:55,321 Speaker 1: But there's also some kind of backlash as well, And 535 00:21:55,640 --> 00:21:58,880 Speaker 1: I was curious on what your perspective is on the 536 00:21:59,001 --> 00:22:01,361 Speaker 1: video and posting that sort of stuff on social media 537 00:22:01,441 --> 00:22:04,801 Speaker 1: and how it felt for you as Ash's partner. 538 00:22:05,041 --> 00:22:07,680 Speaker 2: I didn't read the comments. I don't do that, but 539 00:22:07,921 --> 00:22:10,240 Speaker 2: I thought it was great, like just to see a 540 00:22:10,321 --> 00:22:15,880 Speaker 2: woman in her element and the movement and femininity, like 541 00:22:15,961 --> 00:22:19,161 Speaker 2: it's so sexy and so beautiful, can't look away, can't 542 00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:21,481 Speaker 2: look away, and just a man is drawn to that, 543 00:22:21,561 --> 00:22:26,161 Speaker 2: you know. I was anyway, just centrality movement owning it. 544 00:22:26,761 --> 00:22:28,521 Speaker 1: Do you think it is more on the controversial side 545 00:22:28,521 --> 00:22:30,241 Speaker 1: to post stuff like that on social media? Do you 546 00:22:30,241 --> 00:22:30,920 Speaker 1: think it should be? 547 00:22:30,961 --> 00:22:34,801 Speaker 2: Like I can see how it brings up people's insecurities, 548 00:22:35,400 --> 00:22:38,761 Speaker 2: all the things, all the things, and yeah, you just 549 00:22:38,801 --> 00:22:41,720 Speaker 2: got to remember, everyone's got their own stuff going on, 550 00:22:41,761 --> 00:22:44,401 Speaker 2: and that's the whole thing with social media. Everyone's got 551 00:22:44,400 --> 00:22:46,400 Speaker 2: their own stuff, and it just brings out everything. 552 00:22:46,880 --> 00:22:48,640 Speaker 1: Like why that would be triggering for some women if 553 00:22:48,681 --> 00:22:51,561 Speaker 1: they weren't super sexually embodied, or if they felt. 554 00:22:51,561 --> 00:22:54,881 Speaker 2: A shameful, Yeah, I would say, and I didn't see 555 00:22:54,961 --> 00:22:58,201 Speaker 2: the comments, but there would have been more positive than negative. 556 00:22:58,241 --> 00:23:00,681 Speaker 1: Oh my god, there was so much more positive as 557 00:23:00,681 --> 00:23:03,281 Speaker 1: she was saying that she had support. She was responding 558 00:23:03,281 --> 00:23:05,000 Speaker 1: to her DMS for like a week after with all 559 00:23:05,120 --> 00:23:07,321 Speaker 1: the people who were curious and wanting to know where 560 00:23:07,321 --> 00:23:09,400 Speaker 1: it was done and saying how much they wanted to 561 00:23:09,400 --> 00:23:11,241 Speaker 1: do it for their partners too. There was really only 562 00:23:11,281 --> 00:23:14,400 Speaker 1: a small headful of comments, you know, and you're going 563 00:23:14,441 --> 00:23:15,960 Speaker 1: to get that. You're going to get that. But you 564 00:23:15,961 --> 00:23:18,281 Speaker 1: can see why it would be super triggering. But do 565 00:23:18,321 --> 00:23:20,360 Speaker 1: you feel like it was a super empowering thing to 566 00:23:20,400 --> 00:23:22,281 Speaker 1: be out of witness as she post that and like 567 00:23:22,321 --> 00:23:23,400 Speaker 1: be fully embodied in it. 568 00:23:23,400 --> 00:23:26,001 Speaker 2: Just explains where she's at. Yeah, I see her. I 569 00:23:26,001 --> 00:23:28,441 Speaker 2: see where she's at. Yeah, I'm there for it. Yeah. 570 00:23:28,441 --> 00:23:31,120 Speaker 1: Absolutely. You know, we had a woman recently put in 571 00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:33,001 Speaker 1: the Best the Advice segment and let us know that 572 00:23:33,041 --> 00:23:35,160 Speaker 1: she was forty and she hadn't self pleasured before. 573 00:23:35,400 --> 00:23:35,801 Speaker 2: Wow. 574 00:23:36,001 --> 00:23:39,561 Speaker 1: Yeah, and she hadn't self pleasured up until this year. Sorry, 575 00:23:39,640 --> 00:23:41,761 Speaker 1: it's such a taboo topic and there's so much shame 576 00:23:41,801 --> 00:23:44,360 Speaker 1: around it, but it's something that we all deserve. To 577 00:23:44,600 --> 00:23:47,160 Speaker 1: be in that, Yeah, one hundred percent. But it's just 578 00:23:47,160 --> 00:23:50,281 Speaker 1: so interesting that the contrast between the shame that is 579 00:23:50,281 --> 00:23:52,600 Speaker 1: held around that versus like when a woman is embodied 580 00:23:52,600 --> 00:23:54,080 Speaker 1: in that and how freeing it gets to be. And 581 00:23:54,120 --> 00:23:56,200 Speaker 1: I think it's a beautiful thing that actly gets to 582 00:23:56,201 --> 00:23:59,201 Speaker 1: be a shining light for women to help other women 583 00:23:59,281 --> 00:24:02,721 Speaker 1: see whether that's a wound for them where it triggers them, 584 00:24:02,880 --> 00:24:04,881 Speaker 1: where they're not integrated in that, and how they can 585 00:24:05,241 --> 00:24:07,440 Speaker 1: that energy into their life because it makes everything better. 586 00:24:07,600 --> 00:24:10,920 Speaker 2: Yeah. So I've heard you speak about your sexual shame 587 00:24:10,961 --> 00:24:13,201 Speaker 2: in the past, etc. How did that feel for you 588 00:24:13,241 --> 00:24:14,521 Speaker 2: when you watch the video? Yeah? 589 00:24:14,600 --> 00:24:17,360 Speaker 1: Oh so empowering. Yeah, they were definitely. Back when I 590 00:24:17,441 --> 00:24:20,521 Speaker 1: was in that experience, I definitely felt more shame. And 591 00:24:20,521 --> 00:24:22,561 Speaker 1: whenever I would see anybody post stuff like that on 592 00:24:22,600 --> 00:24:25,561 Speaker 1: social media, it triggered me and it made me jealous 593 00:24:25,561 --> 00:24:27,601 Speaker 1: because I wish that I would allow myself to do that, 594 00:24:27,921 --> 00:24:29,721 Speaker 1: But because I had had that experience, I was like, 595 00:24:29,761 --> 00:24:31,720 Speaker 1: but you're not allowed to do that. I'm allowed to 596 00:24:31,761 --> 00:24:34,160 Speaker 1: have that. You're dirty for wanting that, you're dirty for 597 00:24:34,201 --> 00:24:36,681 Speaker 1: even being sexually expressed. So it was so much shame 598 00:24:36,721 --> 00:24:37,120 Speaker 1: around it. 599 00:24:37,160 --> 00:24:39,840 Speaker 2: Because it more about the people like what others think, 600 00:24:40,160 --> 00:24:41,921 Speaker 2: so or more internal for. 601 00:24:42,001 --> 00:24:45,520 Speaker 1: It was more internalized shame because of how people treated 602 00:24:45,521 --> 00:24:48,161 Speaker 1: me when it happened. So like I was getting messages 603 00:24:48,201 --> 00:24:50,200 Speaker 1: from people at the gym saying, like people were watching it. 604 00:24:50,241 --> 00:24:52,120 Speaker 1: I could hear people whispering when I would walk past, 605 00:24:52,761 --> 00:24:54,440 Speaker 1: you know, all that sort of stuff. You know. So 606 00:24:54,961 --> 00:24:56,761 Speaker 1: to now have already gone on the journey of like 607 00:24:56,840 --> 00:24:59,321 Speaker 1: sexual embodiment. To see how she posts that, it's so 608 00:24:59,481 --> 00:25:02,880 Speaker 1: inspiring because I know how embodied she is now and 609 00:25:02,880 --> 00:25:05,401 Speaker 1: I know the journey she's on, and when I see that, 610 00:25:05,521 --> 00:25:08,321 Speaker 1: I know she's embodying her bigness. She's embodying what is 611 00:25:08,360 --> 00:25:10,961 Speaker 1: true for her. And I think that's a really empowering thing. 612 00:25:11,441 --> 00:25:14,240 Speaker 1: And not a lot of women are bold enough or 613 00:25:14,241 --> 00:25:15,681 Speaker 1: brave enough to do that publicly. 614 00:25:16,001 --> 00:25:18,600 Speaker 2: Do you think it's different if she was single in 615 00:25:18,721 --> 00:25:22,201 Speaker 2: doing that or because she's in a relationship, So I say, 616 00:25:22,201 --> 00:25:24,880 Speaker 2: if you got online and yeah, you dance like that, Yeah, 617 00:25:24,921 --> 00:25:26,360 Speaker 2: would it be different because. 618 00:25:26,080 --> 00:25:28,761 Speaker 1: You're Oh, that's a good question to ask, but also 619 00:25:28,761 --> 00:25:30,841 Speaker 1: a hard one because I think it depends on intention 620 00:25:31,281 --> 00:25:33,041 Speaker 1: and where it comes from. And also it's in the 621 00:25:33,041 --> 00:25:33,400 Speaker 1: eye of the. 622 00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:34,761 Speaker 2: Bus holda only fans. 623 00:25:35,640 --> 00:25:37,801 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, totally right. Is it that or is it 624 00:25:37,801 --> 00:25:40,921 Speaker 1: because I feel sexually empowered? If I felt sexually empowered 625 00:25:40,921 --> 00:25:42,960 Speaker 1: and I was posting that and I had intention to 626 00:25:43,120 --> 00:25:45,440 Speaker 1: help other women explore that for themselves, I don't think 627 00:25:45,481 --> 00:25:47,440 Speaker 1: that there's anything wrong with that, not at all. But 628 00:25:47,521 --> 00:25:49,481 Speaker 1: if it's coming from a wound, then it's my work 629 00:25:49,521 --> 00:25:51,521 Speaker 1: to do, you know. And then also it is dependent 630 00:25:51,561 --> 00:25:54,321 Speaker 1: on the people who are perceiving what is being done, 631 00:25:54,360 --> 00:25:56,801 Speaker 1: because the reality is like you can try to mold 632 00:25:56,921 --> 00:25:59,841 Speaker 1: and show up a certain way, or you know, explain 633 00:25:59,880 --> 00:26:02,840 Speaker 1: yourself so much, but people are going to misunderstanding, whether 634 00:26:02,840 --> 00:26:03,600 Speaker 1: you want them to or not. 635 00:26:03,840 --> 00:26:04,200 Speaker 2: Always. 636 00:26:04,241 --> 00:26:06,561 Speaker 1: You can't control that. So there's going to be people 637 00:26:06,600 --> 00:26:07,961 Speaker 1: who love it, and there are going to be people 638 00:26:07,961 --> 00:26:10,600 Speaker 1: who hate it. But also what I have come to 639 00:26:10,721 --> 00:26:13,400 Speaker 1: learn is if you are actually being yourself and you 640 00:26:13,400 --> 00:26:16,161 Speaker 1: were being authentic, people are going to love and hate you. 641 00:26:16,521 --> 00:26:18,561 Speaker 1: And that's a good indication that you're actually being true 642 00:26:18,561 --> 00:26:21,321 Speaker 1: to who you are. Because I've been super palatable for people, 643 00:26:21,640 --> 00:26:23,440 Speaker 1: and I've had people be lukewarm with me that have 644 00:26:23,721 --> 00:26:24,600 Speaker 1: an opinion about me. 645 00:26:25,400 --> 00:26:29,121 Speaker 2: So since you've met Ashy, when we first saw your 646 00:26:29,160 --> 00:26:32,041 Speaker 2: socials and the way you conducted yourself online as it 647 00:26:32,120 --> 00:26:32,761 Speaker 2: changed it all. 648 00:26:32,921 --> 00:26:35,441 Speaker 1: Yeah, I would say so a good way. Though Ashal 649 00:26:35,441 --> 00:26:37,960 Speaker 1: and I've spoken about this before. Coming on the podcast 650 00:26:38,041 --> 00:26:40,240 Speaker 1: actually really triggered this to me. So before that I 651 00:26:40,281 --> 00:26:43,680 Speaker 1: was very much coach Tiana, right, So I really thought 652 00:26:43,721 --> 00:26:47,400 Speaker 1: I had to be this very well constructed, perfected version 653 00:26:47,441 --> 00:26:50,760 Speaker 1: of yeah, just professional. I thought I'd be professional and 654 00:26:50,801 --> 00:26:54,521 Speaker 1: I thought, yeah, everything, make sure that I would hold 655 00:26:54,521 --> 00:26:57,001 Speaker 1: myself well and speak well and all those things. And 656 00:26:57,360 --> 00:26:59,640 Speaker 1: what I didn't realize was that I was hiding and 657 00:26:59,681 --> 00:27:03,680 Speaker 1: shying away all different parts of my personality when people 658 00:27:03,801 --> 00:27:06,360 Speaker 1: need to feel authenticity to be able to connect with 659 00:27:06,400 --> 00:27:09,121 Speaker 1: you and let alone sell something. And so what has 660 00:27:09,201 --> 00:27:11,480 Speaker 1: changed for me since meeting Ashy and also coming on 661 00:27:11,481 --> 00:27:14,281 Speaker 1: the podcast is that this podcast has allowed me to 662 00:27:14,281 --> 00:27:18,201 Speaker 1: be so much more vulnerable and vulnerably share all sides 663 00:27:18,241 --> 00:27:20,120 Speaker 1: of who I am. So even when we do she 664 00:27:20,281 --> 00:27:22,480 Speaker 1: rises and we post all the content online, we're being 665 00:27:22,561 --> 00:27:25,120 Speaker 1: silly and we're being stupid, and then we're being honest 666 00:27:25,160 --> 00:27:28,001 Speaker 1: and open and raw and vulnerable and really letting people 667 00:27:28,080 --> 00:27:30,241 Speaker 1: see who we are. And I think that's been the 668 00:27:30,241 --> 00:27:32,481 Speaker 1: biggest change, and that's been the biggest influence of like 669 00:27:32,521 --> 00:27:33,600 Speaker 1: Ash coming into my life. 670 00:27:33,640 --> 00:27:36,920 Speaker 2: It's very similar in business actually, like as far as 671 00:27:37,001 --> 00:27:41,080 Speaker 2: content goes, like the polished, edited content pieces just don't 672 00:27:41,080 --> 00:27:44,120 Speaker 2: cut through these days. Things that work are like behind 673 00:27:44,120 --> 00:27:48,561 Speaker 2: the scenes, founder driven, organic type videos. So very similar. 674 00:27:48,681 --> 00:27:52,600 Speaker 2: People just craving authenticity. They don't want the polish stuff. 675 00:27:52,321 --> 00:27:54,640 Speaker 1: Any perfectly curated. They want messy, they want real, they 676 00:27:54,681 --> 00:27:57,440 Speaker 1: want raw, they want raw stories, all the behind the 677 00:27:57,441 --> 00:27:59,840 Speaker 1: scenes stuff. It is so much more fun though. Yeah, 678 00:27:59,921 --> 00:28:02,641 Speaker 1: just this podcast in general with Ash, we've just had 679 00:28:02,721 --> 00:28:03,440 Speaker 1: so much fun. 680 00:28:03,600 --> 00:28:06,161 Speaker 2: Yeah, I can see that. Yes, beautiful, beautiful to watch 681 00:28:06,201 --> 00:28:06,561 Speaker 2: the best. 682 00:28:06,600 --> 00:28:08,920 Speaker 1: It's very heart led. If there was one thing that 683 00:28:08,961 --> 00:28:12,080 Speaker 1: you wanted everyone who doesn't know astually personally to know 684 00:28:12,160 --> 00:28:14,561 Speaker 1: about her, what would you say that it is? 685 00:28:15,041 --> 00:28:18,360 Speaker 2: She's just a beautiful person. I just yeah, she really 686 00:28:18,561 --> 00:28:22,241 Speaker 2: cares about people, she's a lover. She really is genuinely 687 00:28:22,441 --> 00:28:26,120 Speaker 2: authentically beautiful person. Yeah, and sim an act what you 688 00:28:26,160 --> 00:28:29,201 Speaker 2: see online is exactly how she is. But yeah, she's 689 00:28:29,281 --> 00:28:33,481 Speaker 2: authentically a beautiful person. Whether that's a friend, partner, amazing mum, 690 00:28:33,681 --> 00:28:36,401 Speaker 2: you know, very lucky kids, bucky husband as well. 691 00:28:36,561 --> 00:28:39,081 Speaker 1: Absolutely, it makes me emotionally hear you say that because 692 00:28:39,081 --> 00:28:42,241 Speaker 1: I just I love her so much and I'm excited 693 00:28:42,521 --> 00:28:44,480 Speaker 1: to be here on the journey with her and to 694 00:28:44,681 --> 00:28:47,481 Speaker 1: help her see herself more in the way than miss her. 695 00:28:47,761 --> 00:28:49,041 Speaker 1: She deserves that love and return. 696 00:28:49,521 --> 00:28:50,321 Speaker 2: Let's give it to her. 697 00:28:50,481 --> 00:28:52,761 Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, all right, Thank you, Steve, Thank you so 698 00:28:52,881 --> 00:28:55,161 Speaker 1: much for joining last time. I love you too. We'll 699 00:28:55,161 --> 00:28:56,760 Speaker 1: be here on the next one. Thank you, ladies. We'll 700 00:28:56,761 --> 00:28:57,521 Speaker 1: see you on the next one.