Speaker 1: Huge announcement.
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Speaker 1: Hey, guys, it's Anna here. Unfortunately, we don't have a
Speaker 1: new episode this week because I am lapping it up
Speaker 1: in Europe, but we have an amazing episode that we
Speaker 1: are dropping for you. We had so much fun recording
Speaker 1: this and we know that you're going to love it,
Speaker 1: so hope you enjoy. Bye. I want the fairy Tale,
Speaker 1: I want the Prince Charming.
Speaker 2: She how do I put this? Isn't a fan of
Speaker 2: my kissing.
Speaker 1: Style boyfriend and girlfriend for about twelve hours. He's in
Speaker 1: a trash bin. He's non recyclable catching member.
Speaker 2: I love being Love, I love Love.
Speaker 1: On today's episode, where's your Head Out, we are drunk
Speaker 1: texting one another and looking at the psychology behind why
Speaker 1: we feel the need to send risk a messages when
Speaker 1: we are ten shots deep.
Speaker 2: Look, Anna, we've all been there, so we're going to
Speaker 2: help you successfully write and respond to those what are
Speaker 2: you doing text messages?
Speaker 1: Stay tuned to find out whether drunk texts are truly
Speaker 1: sober thoughts. Where's Your Head Out is a podcast that
Speaker 1: talks all things relationships, breakups, reality TV, trending shows, and
Speaker 1: everything in between.
Speaker 2: This is your new go to destination for laughs, gossip,
Speaker 2: intimate details, advice, and much more. Welcome back and another
Speaker 2: day in the studio. How are you feeling.
Speaker 1: I'm okay. Can you see a bit of deep heat.
Speaker 1: I've got to sow next. I feel like pour it
Speaker 1: on my neck to try and like loosen it. You
Speaker 1: know when you just wake up rush. Yeah, I've just
Speaker 1: been waking up a bit rough lately.
Speaker 2: I thought that smell was taking me back to the
Speaker 2: footy change rooms, getting the rubbed down by the weird
Speaker 2: looking trainers telling me that they've never seen muscles as
Speaker 2: big as mine.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. I feel like sometimes you make up
Speaker 1: these comments.
Speaker 2: I swear I hear it, so I don't know if
Speaker 2: someone says it or I think it. It's still in
Speaker 2: my mind.
Speaker 1: Oh god, how's your week been? Good?
Speaker 2: Good? We haven't touched on something though, the fashion show
Speaker 2: from a couple of weeks ago we went to Do
Speaker 2: you remember that one?
Speaker 1: I do remember that one. I actually can't believe you're
Speaker 1: bringing that back up, but yes, I do remember.
Speaker 2: Yes, we didn't touch on the fact that someone was
Speaker 2: walking in there and we had to watch them front row.
Speaker 2: I mean, you didn't want me to bring this up, teacher.
Speaker 1: I didn't really expect Matt to bring this up. So
Speaker 1: I'm a little bit shook. But yes, Matt, I did
Speaker 1: go to a fashion show a few weeks back. Now,
Speaker 1: I thought I had like avoided that chat. But here
Speaker 1: we are.
Speaker 2: I'm being busy. We've had guests in the meantime we've
Speaker 2: chat about, but here it is. We need to it
Speaker 2: as Yeah, so do you want me to Well, we
Speaker 2: were sitting front row, sitting there. It was you meeting
Speaker 2: Jen and Michael, sitting front.
Speaker 1: Row with our partners.
Speaker 2: Yes, we're watching this beautiful fashion show, some beautiful clothes.
Speaker 2: It was an all male runway, so they're coming out
Speaker 2: and who none other that comes out than your ex
Speaker 2: Josh Packham. I'll give you this, he actually did look
Speaker 2: good in what he was wearing.
Speaker 1: I did like it, But to be honest, I was
Speaker 1: surprised you weren't asked because you were an actual model,
Speaker 1: Like you're six foot five. You've I've walked saying no more.
Speaker 1: But I was surprised to see you weren't asked to
Speaker 1: do that runway show.
Speaker 2: But then, to be honest, maybe got lost in my
Speaker 2: junk male. Maybe it's too popular everything. Maybe they knew
Speaker 2: they couldn't afford it. I don't know who knows, but
Speaker 2: yeah I was. I wasn't too surprised. I was an
Speaker 2: inn I sene. I haven't walked a catwalk in what years?
Speaker 2: When was the last time you walked one?
Speaker 1: A long time? I wouldn't do it again.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we did say afterwards so that i'd find it
Speaker 2: pretty weird to do now. I don't think i'd be
Speaker 2: able to take it as seriously as I used to,
Speaker 2: you know what I mean. It'd be different.
Speaker 1: Yeah, like I used to take them very seriously, Like
Speaker 1: I was like full Zoolander mode on I know.
Speaker 2: You definitely I wanted to get that good photo, and
Speaker 2: I mean.
Speaker 1: The guys on the Runway did an amazing job and
Speaker 1: they were very Zoolander.
Speaker 2: So let's talk about it though. Josh Packham, your ex,
Speaker 2: everyone knows that, come strutting out looking very Zoolander. You're
Speaker 2: sitting front row with your ring glistening in the light.
Speaker 1: We made Michael sitting.
Speaker 2: Next to you, John me talking through what emotions you're
Speaker 2: feeling when that happens.
Speaker 1: I didn't really feel any emotions. I was just kind
Speaker 1: of like, I mean, pre show you were like, hey,
Speaker 1: just a little heads up, Josh, your ex and his
Speaker 1: twin brother are walking in the show. So I was like, oh, okay,
Speaker 1: like that's fine, Like it is what it is. You know,
Speaker 1: Josh and I are on like fine terms. There's no
Speaker 1: bad blood. So I was just like that's cool. When
Speaker 1: I saw him, Like, I didn't really feel any type
Speaker 1: of way. I was just like, it is what it is.
Speaker 1: I mean, you were like camera at the ready, like
Speaker 1: zooming in on him, Like that's a bit much, do
Speaker 1: you mad?
Speaker 2: I wanted to get here and then your reaction, but
Speaker 2: you told nothing. You didn't give anything away. It didn't
Speaker 2: look like anything.
Speaker 1: What was strange about that though? And I know that
Speaker 1: you knew this was happening was directly across from me
Speaker 1: and you on this rumway catwalk was the Daily Mail,
Speaker 1: and they had like a camera set up just pointing
Speaker 1: directly at me, Michael, you, and Jen. And I was like,
Speaker 1: is this because they know that my ex boyfriend is
Speaker 1: walking in the rumway and I'm sitting here with my
Speaker 1: new fiance, Like, is that why they're pointing the camera
Speaker 1: at us? Because I was a little bit shook about that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that was a bit awkward, I reckon. I saw
Speaker 2: that as well, and I was like, look too to
Speaker 2: I don't know, look too angry at him or too like,
Speaker 2: you just have to be new.
Speaker 1: Right, Like you can't be happy, you can't laugh, You
Speaker 1: definitely can't look angry.
Speaker 2: In wrestling, we call it no selling, just blank face.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think I did a good blank face.
Speaker 2: You did well. Had you spoken to Josh since you
Speaker 2: guys got engaged.
Speaker 1: No, actually, so.
Speaker 2: No congratulations message or anything from No.
Speaker 1: I didn't I don't think so.
Speaker 2: Maybe maybe you've had too many messages you've lost his.
Speaker 1: No, I'm pretty sure I didn't get a message from him,
Speaker 1: But that's okay.
Speaker 2: Well, speaking of messages, so Jen and I celebrated out
Speaker 2: one year, a couple of weeks ago.
Speaker 1: A big milestone.
Speaker 2: It's gone so quickly.
Speaker 1: What did you guys do for it?
Speaker 2: Well, we went to Crown, spent the night there, had
Speaker 2: a nice night, really played Holy moly, golf, had a
Speaker 2: little bit of friendly competition. Let's just put it this way.
Speaker 2: There were some sexual acts up for grabs for whoever.
Speaker 2: Weans a lot at stake. Really, a couple of hole
Speaker 2: in ones would lead to maybe a hole in one,
Speaker 2: who knows. But yeah, so we're gone. We were looking
Speaker 2: back at old messages and we're like, let's reminisce on
Speaker 2: before we started dating. So she's sitting there in the
Speaker 2: bed and we're going through them, and she took it
Speaker 2: right back. So she went back to the start of
Speaker 2: our Instagram conversation.
Speaker 1: It's hard to get right back. It's a lot of scrolling.
Speaker 2: There was a lot of scrolling, and she got there.
Speaker 2: And let's just say, a couple of those messages from me,
Speaker 2: I think I've touched on them. They were thirsty, were
Speaker 2: they like I was sending some serious like are you
Speaker 2: sending you're my dream girl? You're eleven out of ten,
Speaker 2: I'm going to pick you up. I'll post these on
Speaker 2: the Facebook group if anyone wants to see them. There's
Speaker 2: some really.
Speaker 1: She goes, I'm excited to see there.
Speaker 2: I think one of them, she says. I go, I'm
Speaker 2: going to pick you up for drinks on Monday. Let's
Speaker 2: share a bottle of red. And she's like, I don't
Speaker 2: drink red or something. I can't remember exactly word for word,
Speaker 2: but it was really painful to look back on. But
Speaker 2: we're looking at him. We're looking at the time that
Speaker 2: they were sent in the date, because you see it obviously.
Speaker 2: And I was like, I was like, let's see what
Speaker 2: I was doing, because that time's a very random time.
Speaker 2: So I've gone into my cameraroll. I paid for the
Speaker 2: iCloud Supreme, so I've got it all. I can look
Speaker 2: at photos from like four, five, six years ago. So
Speaker 2: I scroll out. I'm going through my photos. I look,
Speaker 2: I try, I find the month, find the month, I
Speaker 2: find the time, and I figure out I was on
Speaker 2: the Gold Coast with my mates, a having a fun
Speaker 2: trip with the boys that weekend.
Speaker 1: I still having a boys trip when you sent these
Speaker 1: messages to Jen.
Speaker 2: So I'm looking through them. I'm looking through them, and
Speaker 2: I said, what time was that sentence. She was like, oh,
Speaker 2: it looks like eleven something or whatever time it was,
Speaker 2: and I was like, oh my god, you're kidding. And
Speaker 2: I don't remember the exact time, but it was like
Speaker 2: eleven twenty eight. I sent the messages and at eleven
Speaker 2: thirty there was a photo of me in a booth
Speaker 2: with my mates the huge fish bowl, just absolutely pissed
Speaker 2: out of my eyelids, just like this with a fishbowl.
Speaker 2: So two minutes before I had taken that photo pissed,
Speaker 2: I was sending Jen thirsty messages.
Speaker 1: We love a drunk text, don't we.
Speaker 2: But it was completely not gonna get me anywhere. She
Speaker 2: was in Melbourne. I was on the Gold Coast.
Speaker 1: See that just shows the levels that you're willing to
Speaker 1: go for for Jen. Like you were so obsessed with
Speaker 1: her that even although you were in different states, you
Speaker 1: were like, I don't care. You're getting a drunk text night.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're looking fit in whatever story you're posted. You're
Speaker 2: getting someone please lock me up. Not doing well.
Speaker 1: Look on that note, I think it's time to took
Speaker 1: all things at drunk texts. Okay, Matt, So you used
Speaker 1: to drunk text you're now girl friend Jen before you
Speaker 1: guys had even met, and you used to send her
Speaker 1: heaps of drunk messages. But the question that I want
Speaker 1: to ask is why did you drunk text? Like, why
Speaker 1: do we drunk text?
Speaker 2: Well, I think that one was I was quite drunk.
Speaker 2: I'm not gonna lie. I'm probably pretty horny throwing some
Speaker 2: feelers out there. Hail Mary is I like to call them.
Speaker 2: So in American football, hail Mary, Yeah, is when the
Speaker 2: quarterback will throw it and just hope it lands.
Speaker 1: So you're sending out a few hail marys.
Speaker 2: Mary. When I used to get drunk and I was single,
Speaker 2: being one of them will land. You know, I'm not
Speaker 2: picking up right now, but she was in a different state.
Speaker 2: I was hoping it landed.
Speaker 1: It landed for the following weekend.
Speaker 2: It eventually landed, and that's the point of hail Mary.
Speaker 2: It eventually. So but why would you send a drunk text?
Speaker 1: Well, look, I think we all send drunk texts because
Speaker 1: we have a bit of Dutch courage. We're feeling a
Speaker 1: little bit more confident. We probably think less about the
Speaker 1: ramifications of that text the next day when you're sober,
Speaker 1: So I guess we're maybe less accountable for our actions.
Speaker 2: How about the next day when you wake up and
Speaker 2: you see some of the messages you've said demons demons
Speaker 2: just straight swipe to leave.
Speaker 1: I don't even look stop it, so you won't even
Speaker 1: go in to see the chat.
Speaker 2: I never would.
Speaker 1: I just feel like that It doesn't like they're not
Speaker 1: knowing stress you out even more.
Speaker 2: Ignorance is bliss. That's not the mindset that I have, Like,
Speaker 2: I just don't want to know what I've said because
Speaker 2: I've known I've seen in some states and I would
Speaker 2: have sent some real fucked up stuff and used to
Speaker 2: lead it. I've got one for you.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Do you know when a guy is sending you a
Speaker 2: hail Mary text?
Speaker 1: What do you mean? Like they're just throwing it out
Speaker 1: their drunk texts, as in like he's trying to get late.
Speaker 2: Do you know when they come through?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Absolutely surely.
Speaker 1: How do you like a wyd are what you're doing
Speaker 1: is like if someone's throwing out a wyd you know
Speaker 1: that it's a booty call, right, Like it's not even
Speaker 1: a hey, how you going?
Speaker 2: What guys are sent? Actually sending that?
Speaker 1: Someone sent me a wyd and I was like, I
Speaker 1: literally I remember he sent it. To me the week
Speaker 1: prior and then the next week I was out at
Speaker 1: the club and I was like, the audacity of you
Speaker 1: to send me a wyd Like.
Speaker 2: How did you know him? How well did you know?
Speaker 1: He was? Just like he's just like the town player
Speaker 1: and fuck boy, so like it wasn't a surprise to
Speaker 1: get to what you're doing from him. But like I
Speaker 1: was just thinking, like I wonder how many wyds he
Speaker 1: sent out that night, like at least ten, at least
Speaker 1: at a minimum, at a minimum ten. But yeah, I
Speaker 1: think to answer your question personally, for me, I think
Speaker 1: the difference between a nine to fifty nine message and
Speaker 1: a ten o'clock message is massive because I think when
Speaker 1: it ticks over to ten o'clock, it's a booty call. Right.
Speaker 2: You said this before, and I was saying that, I
Speaker 2: think that's still a bit early, I know, kicking around
Speaker 2: twelve one.
Speaker 1: I think like in general, if someone's messaging you after
Speaker 1: seven pm on a Friday or a Saturday night, you
Speaker 1: can guarantee they're out drinking with their friends. They're not
Speaker 1: messaging you because they're trying to tea up a day.
Speaker 1: They're messaging you because they're like I'm out. I want
Speaker 1: to see if you're out and like, let's link up later.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I've definitely yeah, everyone's stuff, definitely sent them. I
Speaker 2: just want to know if girls actually know that they're
Speaker 2: coming in hot as a wid text an actual like
Speaker 2: you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: What do you mean?
Speaker 2: No, So, like a guy sends you on, have you
Speaker 2: ever woken up to guys sending him to?
Speaker 1: Absolutely? Yeah, what do you do?
Speaker 2: Just laugh?
Speaker 1: I just don't reply. I'm like, that's embarrassing and like
Speaker 1: you're probably gonna look at that in the morning and go, yeah,
Speaker 1: but if you like them then but if you like them,
Speaker 1: then maybe you would reply be like haha, someone had
Speaker 1: a big night last night, you know, like a bit
Speaker 1: of cheekiness.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I remember. Actually I was seeing this guy probably like
Speaker 1: two years before I met Michael, and it's actually someone
Speaker 1: that Michael has met a couple of times. So Michael
Speaker 1: is aware of this person who I used to date.
Speaker 2: As a civil obviously who you and the guy still civil? No?
Speaker 1: No, we don't talk and we hadn't talked for a while. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but I remember when that guy who I used to
Speaker 1: see found out that I was seeing Michael, he then
Speaker 1: sent me like a twelve o'clock message being like, what
Speaker 1: are you up to? Are you out? And then Michael
Speaker 1: saw them. Yeah, me and Michael were in bed and
Speaker 1: Michael saw the message and he's like, he knows that
Speaker 1: we're seeing each other, and he has a messaged you
Speaker 1: in about six months, and the fact that this is
Speaker 1: a message at midnight that he's sending you when he
Speaker 1: knows that we're seeing each other, it's just playing rude, right.
Speaker 2: Yeah, So what do you think the meaning behind that
Speaker 2: would be?
Speaker 1: Then, well, I don't really know specifically, but I have
Speaker 1: a few theories. The first one would be like, obviously,
Speaker 1: this other guy is kind of like, well I was
Speaker 1: seeing Anna before Michael, so he's kind of like seeing
Speaker 1: if I'm still open to the idea of him, which
Speaker 1: I wasn't and I didn't reply, So maybe he was
Speaker 1: just like testing the waters to see like where my
Speaker 1: head was at, and my head was with Michael, and
Speaker 1: he never got a reply again he got to go sting.
Speaker 2: Poor guy, throwing throwing out those text messages. Well, there's
Speaker 2: a lot of reasons.
Speaker 1: I don't know would you do that, Like if you
Speaker 1: were seeing someone like six months ago, and then let's
Speaker 1: just say you're single, for the argument's sake, So you're
Speaker 1: seeing someone six months ago, and then someone who you've
Speaker 1: met a few times, like a guy, start seeing that person.
Speaker 2: Wouldn't give a fuck to be honest.
Speaker 1: Okay, So what would make you send a message like that?
Speaker 2: I don't know, why would you send a message unless
Speaker 2: you were trying to like cook back up with them.
Speaker 2: I don't think i'd give a shit if they were
Speaker 2: seeing someone else.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so maybe he's trying to see maybe.
Speaker 2: You're trying to see how serious you are with the
Speaker 2: other person.
Speaker 1: So yeah, can you have another.
Speaker 2: Crack at him?
Speaker 1: Yeah? And I think that's why, Yeah, that happened.
Speaker 2: Okay. So there's a lot of meanings behind sending a
Speaker 2: drunk text. I feel a lot of them would be
Speaker 2: that if you've received a drunk text from someone, they're
Speaker 2: thinking of you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, And like also, I feel like sometimes I
Speaker 1: reckon that I've sent drunk texts because I maybe feel
Speaker 1: a certain way about someone, but I really have no
Speaker 1: idea if those feelings are reciprocated, And so then I'm
Speaker 1: kind of like, well, I'm not going to say anything,
Speaker 1: But then when I get a little bit tipsy, I'm
Speaker 1: like fuck it, I'm just gonna like tell them how
Speaker 1: I feel and test the waters and confess all of
Speaker 1: my feelings towards them kind of thing. You know.
Speaker 2: I reread it the next day and you got that
Speaker 2: hangover anxiety hangover from hell. Yeah. This so another reason
Speaker 2: be something reminded you of them. So I was remember
Speaker 2: New Year's Eve, Jen, someone she used to see, texted her, Yeah,
Speaker 2: actually was something that reminded them of her. She didn't
Speaker 2: reply over sleep because me and her were having a
Speaker 2: cute romantic thing. But like, that's an ambitious way to
Speaker 2: slide into someone's like DMS or rekindle something.
Speaker 1: I've had that though, have you. Yeah, Like someone will
Speaker 1: be like, oh, I'm at this restaurant that we once
Speaker 1: went to, and then they'll be like this reminded me
Speaker 1: of you, or like something like that, And it is
Speaker 1: it's definitely a slide in like and especially if someone's
Speaker 1: in a relationship, it's very like you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: Like it's definitely on that boundary of crossing a line,
Speaker 1: but it also could be super harmless with no malice.
Speaker 2: I don't think it was it was him. It was
Speaker 2: very share of details they could feel intimidated by you
Speaker 2: and they can't talk to you sober. So I think
Speaker 2: a lot of girls have felt this. Messaged me. Have
Speaker 2: you been intimidated by someone who message to him while
Speaker 2: you were drunk and you can talk to him while
Speaker 2: you were sober? Michael, do that to you?
Speaker 1: I mean me and Michael definitely had like a lot
Speaker 1: of drunk messages, like back and forth before we actually
Speaker 1: had a first day, Like we would kind of chat
Speaker 1: when he was out and I was out, and then
Speaker 1: we'd like try and kind of meet up, but then
Speaker 1: it wouldn't work out. But I have a question for you.
Speaker 1: Do you think that you can send a drunk text
Speaker 1: and it's just like a genuine mistake, Like it just
Speaker 1: has no meaning behind it.
Speaker 2: Like the wrong person or you used to know, like you.
Speaker 1: Send the message maybe because you're bored, or like you're
Speaker 1: maybe reaching out to like everyone in your phone book
Speaker 1: who comes up, and like there's literally no meaning behind it.
Speaker 1: So you could send someone a message and I don't know,
Speaker 1: like flame react to something of someone, and then you
Speaker 1: wake up in the morning and you're like, oh, why
Speaker 1: did I do that? Like that's not how I feel
Speaker 1: at all. That used to be my Saturday flames to everyone.
Speaker 1: That's like giving out flames to the Holand I woke up.
Speaker 2: In Vegas one time when I was like, ham it.
Speaker 2: My dams were just not well. I really, have you
Speaker 2: ever drunk texted me?
Speaker 1: Have I drunk texted you in that way?
Speaker 2: But ever drunk texted anything? I think I drunk texted
Speaker 2: you the other day at the racist didn't I it's
Speaker 2: something I can't remember. We were chatting and it was
Speaker 2: a fucking no.
Speaker 1: I got a message. So Matt was at the races
Speaker 1: the other day and I got this message from these
Speaker 1: two girls and they sent me a message. Let me
Speaker 1: see if I can find my screenshot you screenshot. I
Speaker 1: screenshot at it because it was so good. So it's
Speaker 1: these like two beautiful blonde girls with Matt and then
Speaker 1: it says where are you from? That? So I got
Speaker 1: a drunk text recently from that through other people, and
Speaker 1: I was like, that is so hilarious, Like I don't know, like,
Speaker 1: we'll put this photo on our Facebook page for everyone.
Speaker 2: Look I look on Wow, that looks like.
Speaker 1: His eyes are like not there.
Speaker 2: But that's what endless amounts of champagne duty.
Speaker 1: Yeah, good champagne though, very good champagne at the race,
Speaker 1: Very good Champagne.
Speaker 2: So I haven't drunk texted. You only threw someone.
Speaker 1: Else through someone else. You've drunk texted me? But yeah, no,
Speaker 1: I don't think. We don't really drunk text each other.
Speaker 1: Like it's not really a thing. I mean, do you
Speaker 1: drunk text Jen if you're having a boy's night all
Speaker 1: the time? Yeah, And what do you say?
Speaker 2: I can't wait to get home to you, can't wait
Speaker 2: to snuggle. I can't wait to snuggle. I should see
Speaker 2: what I'm packing. It's coming in hot Do you do
Speaker 2: that with Michael or Michael do that with you?
Speaker 1: Look, I'm if he's on a boy's night and I'm home,
Speaker 1: I kind of try to leave him to his own
Speaker 1: devices because I don't want to be like two overbearing.
Speaker 1: I'm like, we live together, we spend a lot of
Speaker 1: time together. We have like work projects that we're doing together.
Speaker 1: So like, I'm going to leave him be. But like
Speaker 1: the drunk messages that he sends me are so funny.
Speaker 1: He's like, I mean, before we were engaged, I want
Speaker 1: to marry you. I'm going to put a ring on
Speaker 1: that finger. He says, like, I want to have babies
Speaker 1: with you. I can't wait till we have kids. Michael's
Speaker 1: going to kill me.
Speaker 2: Yes, threw him straight under the bass. Okay, so what's
Speaker 2: the most cringe drunk message you've ever seen?
Speaker 1: Oh? I don't even know. I think I've like mentally
Speaker 1: blocked those out, like you said, Like, I definitely haven't
Speaker 1: deleted them. But in the realm of this, I do
Speaker 1: remember like a moment in time, and I think I
Speaker 1: was nineteen, and I've told this story on the podcast
Speaker 1: before my first love, the first like proper boyfriend that
Speaker 1: I had. He went to schoolies cheated on me six
Speaker 1: times in seven days. I was a heartbroken, you know.
Speaker 1: We broke up and I remember the moment. It wasn't
Speaker 1: a drunk text, but it was. I mean, it was
Speaker 1: drunk text, It was drunk text, it was drunk calls,
Speaker 1: it was everything. So I was at the bowling alley
Speaker 1: with all of my friends. We were getting lit, yeah,
Speaker 1: and I was very drunk, and I had broken up
Speaker 1: with him and i'd gone like no contact, and I
Speaker 1: was just like, I'm cutting you out of my life.
Speaker 1: I'd been so strong, I was so proud of myself,
Speaker 1: and then I just like, you know, when you just
Speaker 1: have one drink too many and you just tip over
Speaker 1: to like drunk into like psychotic.
Speaker 2: It's like those tiktoks when it's like the girl's taking
Speaker 2: a sip of the drink and she's like, boyfriend thinks
Speaker 2: he's getting kinky me, but he's getting like muhammad a
Speaker 2: leading me or something like that.
Speaker 1: Yeah. So, like I literally had one drink too many
Speaker 1: and I was with my friends. I was extremely intoxicated,
Speaker 1: and I remember thinking, it's a Friday night. This motherfucker
Speaker 1: who's cheated on me and broken my heart is out
Speaker 1: because I think I could see that he was out
Speaker 1: on socials, and I think that was part of the
Speaker 1: part of the tipping process that triggered you. The triggering, Yeah,
Speaker 1: the trigger. And then I was like, he's going to
Speaker 1: be hooking up with other girls. He's probably going to
Speaker 1: be sleeping with other girls. And I I'm actually ashamed
Speaker 1: to say this, but like we're going to be honest.
Speaker 1: I started blowing up his phone with calls. I think
Speaker 1: I called him like at least nineteen times no answer. No,
Speaker 1: I think he did answer, and then I started yelling
Speaker 1: at him and he hung up on me. And then
Speaker 1: I proceeded to retry and call him. I think he
Speaker 1: could tell I was slurring to the maximum. I think,
Speaker 1: I like, what do you mean, Paul Bloke? He cheated
Speaker 1: on me six times and seven.
Speaker 2: Day dog for doing that?
Speaker 1: Yeah, he deserved everything that was coming to him. But
Speaker 1: like at the same time, like because I had been
Speaker 1: so strong, the whole like strong facad that I was
Speaker 1: putting on came crumbling down and I was like messaging
Speaker 1: him like answer my calls, do this? Do that? Anyway,
Speaker 1: there was a long call log of call logs and
Speaker 1: message log.
Speaker 2: Do you leave voicemails?
Speaker 1: No? Thank god? Fuck was the only thing worse than
Speaker 1: like drunk calling and drunk texting is drunk voicemails. That's
Speaker 1: like a whole new level. But anyway, I woke up
Speaker 1: the next day and I was mortified, like absolutely mortified.
Speaker 1: And the thing is is I wasn't going to call
Speaker 1: them an apologize because I was like, I mean, you
Speaker 1: cheated on me. Fuck you, Like you've called to me
Speaker 1: so much trauma. Like my nineteen year old trusting, you know,
Speaker 1: wholesome self was completely destroyed by this guy. And I
Speaker 1: became like this like crazy trust issued person who like
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, was a little unstable, so
Speaker 1: I was like, fuck you. But also I'm not apologized.
Speaker 2: You deserve that. In all those drunk messages, absolutely had
Speaker 2: it coming. I can't think of the most cringe drunk
Speaker 2: message I've ever sent, but I remember the most painful
Speaker 2: drunk messaging encounter I've ever had. Right, So I went
Speaker 2: out with my mates. Jen went out with her mates.
Speaker 2: This was a little while ago when I lived with
Speaker 2: my mates and she lived by herself. So we've gone out.
Speaker 2: I've gone out, She's gone back home. She's like, I'm home.
Speaker 2: We're sending you know, those fiery, those firing messages at
Speaker 2: each other, Like I'm like, you better be ready. I'm
Speaker 2: coming in hot. You better get ready for this. It's
Speaker 2: going down. When I get there, I've had a couple
Speaker 2: more shots of tequila. I'm in the ubercoming. She's going
Speaker 2: to be quiet, though, so I'm like, you know, all right,
Speaker 2: she's getting ready. It's all happening now, just in the shower,
Speaker 2: freshening enough. And then I get there and I call her,
Speaker 2: no answer. I text her no answer, call he no answer,
Speaker 2: and I'm out the front, really pissed, ready to go.
Speaker 2: I'm like, what's going on? Ring her doorbell, no answer.
Speaker 2: I'm calling her NonStop, throwing rocks at her window, literally
Speaker 2: like I'm out of a rom column, trying to wake
Speaker 2: her up. I'm like, wait, Jan, Jan, get the door.
Speaker 2: I'm throwing all these rocks. Nothing's happening. I'm sitting there.
Speaker 2: I reckon for like twenty minutes, and I'm like, you
Speaker 2: know what I reckon. She's either died, hopefully not, or
Speaker 2: passed out.
Speaker 1: So I was like, okay for the ladder.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I'm like, I wasn't too annoyed.
Speaker 1: I was.
Speaker 2: I mean, I was quite annoyed. I was, so I
Speaker 2: was like, damn, what am I gonna do now? So
Speaker 2: I just got an uber went home. Luckily enough, it
Speaker 2: was when I was living with my mates. They were
Speaker 2: coincidentally still up playing NFL Madden, so I sat with them,
Speaker 2: had a couple of drinks with them, and then she
Speaker 2: actually woke up from her passed out state. And I
Speaker 2: then called and you were back.
Speaker 1: At what time? Is it?
Speaker 2: Five am? Maybe?
Speaker 1: Wow, that's a big night for both of you, Jesus Christ.
Speaker 2: And let's say I got there and we went to bed.
Speaker 2: We're both pretty but that was probably one of the
Speaker 2: most painful drunk encounters I've had over.
Speaker 1: That's so annoying because you're like thinking I'm about to
Speaker 1: get lucky and then it just is an absolute let down.
Speaker 2: It was.
Speaker 1: But has a drunk text ever worked in your favor
Speaker 1: on Matt, because I know, like you know, when we're younger,
Speaker 1: we send these like drunk texts and like try and
Speaker 1: hit it. Maybe if you were like too afraid to
Speaker 1: show your emotions to someone and then it ended up
Speaker 1: working out, Like have do you have a situation like that?
Speaker 2: I only have the obvious when you've sent someone a
Speaker 2: drunk message when you've left and they've come picked you up,
Speaker 2: and like you wouldn't message them, so yeah, yeah, yeah
Speaker 2: them none more. I've shared my emotions. I don't think, ah, look,
Speaker 2: I think there's nothing wrong with a good drunk text.
Speaker 1: I think like if you're single, the other person's person
Speaker 1: is single, like why not? You know what I mean? Like,
Speaker 1: sometimes it does break down that barrier that we hold
Speaker 1: up so high, and like sometimes we are scared to
Speaker 1: share our emotions. A lot of us have been hurt,
Speaker 1: and like we have walls up, and sometimes when we're drunk,
Speaker 1: the walls come down and we start seeing everything in
Speaker 1: like fairy tales, and it's sometimes nice to send one
Speaker 1: of those messages.
Speaker 2: And see what happens.
Speaker 1: We see what happens and roll the dice, you know,
Speaker 1: play the roulette.
Speaker 2: If you're a serial drunk text message like I was
Speaker 2: myself and it's not getting you anywhere, do we have
Speaker 2: some advice on how people can deal with that?
Speaker 1: Okay, Matt, Look, let's talk about the ways to deal
Speaker 1: with the repercussions of drunk texts next.
Speaker 2: So you reckon, people shouldn't act like me, just delete
Speaker 2: the messages and act like they never happened. What do
Speaker 2: you mean it's a safe way to deal with your
Speaker 2: drunk text I mean.
Speaker 1: Look, I if they've not cheated on me multiple times,
Speaker 1: I think a good little apology sorry I was drunk
Speaker 1: is a really good way to just like dissolve a
Speaker 1: lot of that anxiety instead of it being surrounded by
Speaker 1: that person. So if you to ever see them out again,
Speaker 1: you're like, holy shit, I have sent them numerous drunk
Speaker 1: text messages and I'm super embarrassed. Like I think sometimes
Speaker 1: just a sorry I was really hammered is a good
Speaker 1: way to go about.
Speaker 2: It, or just to laugh it off. Yeah, I be
Speaker 2: like ha ha ha, sorry really drunk last night?
Speaker 1: Yeah hahaha. Obviously last night was big for me. I
Speaker 1: hope you had a good time.
Speaker 2: By the way, still feel that way on the weekend
Speaker 2: for a day? Yeah, by the way, I still feel
Speaker 2: like that. Oh yeah, obviously just do what I do,
Speaker 2: Just ignore it completely and never happened. But like you said,
Speaker 2: those awkward run ins will be awkward as it's a
Speaker 2: small world out there. You don't know when you're going
Speaker 2: to see him next, God forbid their work colleague or something.
Speaker 1: It's just too much like that is that is way
Speaker 1: more anxiety And do you think? And I think the
Speaker 1: only thing worse than that is drunk texting an X.
Speaker 1: That's a whole new realm of drunk texting, right.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like what you did, I've actually never drunk texted
Speaker 2: an X. I don't think because you don't think, I
Speaker 2: don't think. I, like I said, I've not that. You
Speaker 2: can recall that I've once like block their numbers the
Speaker 2: other ones I don't really need to deal with.
Speaker 1: Yeah, fair, It's just it's.
Speaker 2: Not really but I guess people, Yeah, they obviously have
Speaker 2: unresolved feelings and they were just drunk call their X
Speaker 2: and invented all to them.
Speaker 1: Well, I have a story about one of my ex
Speaker 1: is drunk texting me via Snapchat. So funnily enough, since
Speaker 1: we're on this my first love and my first boyfriend,
Speaker 1: the one who cheated on me six times and seven days,
Speaker 1: we've heard a lot about him in this episode.
Speaker 2: This guy gets more airtime than Michael at this point.
Speaker 1: Well, he actually so. I was in a six year relationship,
Speaker 1: and three years into that relationship, I actually got a
Speaker 1: drunk text from him, yea, and it was on stat Chat,
Speaker 1: so he was being a bit dodgy, and it was
Speaker 1: a paragraph, and the paragraph basically was saying how much
Speaker 1: he loved me, how he can't believe I'm still in
Speaker 1: a relationship. He thought it was like a thing that
Speaker 1: was going to pass and we'd get back together. And
Speaker 1: he was like telling me how like he like I'm
Speaker 1: his first love. Like I didn't obviously reply because I
Speaker 1: was like, fuck cute, still salty. Five years later on,
Speaker 1: you guys.
Speaker 2: Have had a lot of drunk text messaging to each other.
Speaker 1: Well, I mean when I was drunk texting him, it
Speaker 1: was a very it was very fresh, like I was.
Speaker 1: I was very fragile at that point, but this was
Speaker 1: like I was like very settled in living with another
Speaker 1: boyfriend when I got that message from him. So it
Speaker 1: was a bit out of the blue for me, and
Speaker 1: I was a bit like taken aback. It was very unaccepted.
Speaker 1: But look, Matt, let's talk about why X's drunk text us.
Speaker 2: All right, So one of the main ones would probably
Speaker 2: be there looking for an ego boost. They might need
Speaker 2: someone that, like, you know, you're an easy target if
Speaker 2: you're like an X, you know, you need a target
Speaker 2: for them to pick up and try and get that
Speaker 2: affection from and those words of affirmation that make them
Speaker 2: feel good.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And it's just getting that validation. Like obviously, if
Speaker 1: you're in a relationship with that person, there was a
Speaker 1: time where you were both in love, you both would
Speaker 1: validate each other, and sometimes when you're single and alone,
Speaker 1: you do miss that validation. So I think that's one
Speaker 1: of the main reasons why you might be getting a
Speaker 1: text from an X.
Speaker 2: They could also just have unresolved feelings, like I said before,
Speaker 2: like a drunk person hasn't like you know, they haven't
Speaker 2: worked through their feelings, like as a sober person, so
Speaker 2: when they're drunk, all those emotions have come to the
Speaker 2: surface and they just read it unload on you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I mean I think the last reason why
Speaker 1: your ex is texting maybe they just want to get laid.
Speaker 1: Maybe they're like, the sex was really good. Should we
Speaker 1: have one last hurrah?
Speaker 2: And maybe that's that's such a certain easy way. And
Speaker 2: if you're up for a take it because you know
Speaker 2: the sex was good, don't turn down good sex.
Speaker 1: Do you reckon that an ex is ever messaging you
Speaker 1: when they're drunk because they're wanting to get back together, Yeah.
Speaker 2: I reckon, But then they're drunk. But then is it
Speaker 2: true that like sober thoughts are a drunk voice.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I think sometimes yes, and then in
Speaker 1: other times no.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I think think those fleeting like one second thoughts that
Speaker 1: you might have, and then if you're drunk, you might
Speaker 1: hold on to it and be like, let's send to
Speaker 1: say that.
Speaker 2: Like you're drunk, you get really obsessed over thoughts that
Speaker 2: when you're sober you probably wouldn't care about it.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, Like I think sometimes people might hold on
Speaker 1: to drunk text that. Yeah, like if a guy was
Speaker 1: to message them and be like, oh my god, you're
Speaker 1: the one. You're amazing, Like you know, my ex said
Speaker 1: to me, you're the one that got away. If I
Speaker 1: hold on that like, well.
Speaker 2: I did say to Jen that I was obsessed with her,
Speaker 2: and look here we are. I don't know, maybe some
Speaker 2: truth in it.
Speaker 1: Maybe, well look, I think it's that time of the
Speaker 1: show that you guys have all been waiting for. Let's
Speaker 1: jump into where's our head at? Okay, Matt, So, Lily
Speaker 1: has said I have been chatting to a guy and
Speaker 1: he usually texts me on a weekend around ten to
Speaker 1: eleven PM when he has been drinking. Is he interested
Speaker 1: in me and just needs the confidence from drinking or
Speaker 1: is it just a late night booty call.
Speaker 2: Do you want to break it to Lily or do
Speaker 2: you want me to Anna?
Speaker 1: Well, I mean you can tell her from a male
Speaker 1: perspective and then I'll give my opinion.
Speaker 2: He doesn't message you all week and then messages you
Speaker 2: then to meet up? Is that what how she means?
Speaker 1: It sounds like that he usually texts me on the weekend.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're a booty call, Lily.
Speaker 1: That does sound a bit booty call ish. Although I
Speaker 1: just want to say one thing. When Michael and I
Speaker 1: first met and we hadn't gone on a first date,
Speaker 1: I did get a couple of like weekends messages from him,
Speaker 1: like around nine o'clock or something, and I think it
Speaker 1: was because I was on his mind. So just because
Speaker 1: someone is giving you those booty call messages, it doesn't
Speaker 1: necessarily have to be like doom and gloom. It could mean, like,
Speaker 1: you know, set your boundary and be like, take me
Speaker 1: on a date. That's what I said. I was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm busy tonight, but like you can take me on
Speaker 1: a date during the week if you're free.
Speaker 2: And maybe he's just not a really a good chat.
Speaker 2: He doesn't have good chats, and when he's been drinking,
Speaker 2: that's when he feels like he does and he's actually got,
Speaker 2: like she said, the confidence to message. Yeah, but from
Speaker 2: me my personal opinion ten to eleven's late, it's probably.
Speaker 1: A booty coll But like it doesn't mean it's the end,
Speaker 1: is what we're saying.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so maybe ask him, Yeah, just take you on
Speaker 2: a date during the week and see how he is.
Speaker 2: He's message him during the week and see if he replies.
Speaker 2: If you leave you on scene, then you know what
Speaker 2: you said, don't talk to me again.
Speaker 1: Okay, so Claire has said I always send the most
Speaker 1: embarrassing drunk messages on a night out and have anxiety
Speaker 1: the next day waiting for people to either respond or
Speaker 1: laugh it off. How can I stop self sabotaging like.
Speaker 2: This, um turn your plane onto aeroplane mode, I reckon
Speaker 2: while you're out? There should be you know what the
Speaker 2: actually there actually should be like you know how it's
Speaker 2: got all those settings on your phone like dn D,
Speaker 2: like you know, sleep, work, all that sort of stuff.
Speaker 2: There should be one that's like don't text your ex.
Speaker 2: Well yeah, yeah, that like drinking mode, and it like
Speaker 2: it filters your messages.
Speaker 1: For you and so good.
Speaker 2: Why hasn't Apple thought of that? Imagine you go all right, I'm.
Speaker 1: Going because think about it. If you're drunk enough, you'll
Speaker 1: be like, let's turn this ship off.
Speaker 2: But you have to fully there's a full like step
Speaker 2: by step.
Speaker 1: You'd probably do it if you're drunk, if you're like,
Speaker 1: let's go through the yeah.
Speaker 2: Let's go to but that would be unreal. So it
Speaker 2: actually warns you or it holds our message till the
Speaker 2: next day, and then you get to send the message
Speaker 2: because that's that would be nice if it did that,
Speaker 2: but if another way would probably just be I don't know,
Speaker 2: because it's who she's messaging. It's not like she's messaging
Speaker 2: a single person. She's messaging a bunch of people.
Speaker 1: Look clear, we've all been there, We've all sent drunk
Speaker 1: text messages, and look, I think it's the way that
Speaker 1: you deal with it the next day, just laugh it off.
Speaker 1: And I don't know, Like I think I got to
Speaker 1: a point where I would send a few drunk text
Speaker 1: messages here and there, But then you just have to
Speaker 1: develop that self control where you're like, I don't care
Speaker 1: what time it is, I don't care if I'm alone,
Speaker 1: I refuse to text someone and just start building up
Speaker 1: that self control. Like obviously it's not fullL proof sometimes,
Speaker 1: you know, drunk, Yeah, people slip through the cracks and
Speaker 1: you accidentally send that risk a message. But in general,
Speaker 1: I think it's just about you.
Speaker 2: Know, maybe block people that you don't want to send
Speaker 2: the messages to.
Speaker 1: Maybe, look, don't block everyone, like.
Speaker 2: The ones where it's really going to fuck your life up,
Speaker 2: you know, like your ex or your person you're chatting
Speaker 2: to at the time.
Speaker 1: I guess I remember my ex who I used to
Speaker 1: drunk text a lot. I literally changed his name on
Speaker 1: my phone to do not message, and then there was
Speaker 1: like the big cross, you know, the emoji cross, and
Speaker 1: then like I had a red flag as well.
Speaker 2: That doesn't always work. My best friend in old roommate Joseph,
Speaker 2: he's now dating his boss's daughter. Mao, so you've met them. Yes,
Speaker 2: she is still saved in his phone. It's don't be stupid,
Speaker 2: So that's underd. Yeah, so he's saved hers don't be stupid.
Speaker 2: So when he got drunk to not message her because
Speaker 2: it's his boss's daughter. Now they're dating, and because I
Speaker 2: remember I was sitting with him.
Speaker 1: On the now he's about to inherit that company, yeah
Speaker 1: he's yeah.
Speaker 2: So I literally sitting on the couch and his phone
Speaker 2: pops up, was like don't be and I was like,
Speaker 2: who the fuck's messaging you? Don't be stupid?
Speaker 1: And he goes, it's mal that's hilarious that he's kept it.
Speaker 1: I love that.
Speaker 2: That might work for some people, but for hum it
Speaker 2: didn't work.
Speaker 1: Yeah, look, good luck to you. We know how challenging
Speaker 1: it can be.
Speaker 2: Yeah, just own them, just you know what, just own them,
Speaker 2: delete them cutting out your life. Act like they never
Speaker 2: happened either one.
Speaker 1: Works live in fantasy lambs here.
Speaker 2: Okay, that's all we've got time for today.
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Speaker 2: Bye, love ya hye
Speaker 1: Mm hmm