WEBVTT - Why do I have to be EVERYONE'S PA?!

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<v Speaker 1>Apod Shape Production. Welcome back to another episode of Am

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<v Speaker 1>I A Bad Mum Podcast? School's back. School is back,

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<v Speaker 1>and so Gracie's first year of high school. So you

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<v Speaker 1>had that whole, you know, feelings. I'm sure you'll talk

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<v Speaker 1>about it in another episode. But off she goes, which

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<v Speaker 1>is a whole new chapter high school. Whereas I had

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<v Speaker 1>a moment of going, Wow, this is year eleven for us.

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<v Speaker 1>This is their last full year because next year is

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<v Speaker 1>pretty much a half a year or a bit longer.

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<v Speaker 2>You've got all of like the formals and like it

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<v Speaker 2>takes up, and then they've got their exams, so there's

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<v Speaker 2>not a huge amount for them for next year. So

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<v Speaker 2>you're under I would say you're under a like be

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<v Speaker 2>just on a year to go.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, this is a big year because they've got tafe,

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<v Speaker 1>they're doing a hospitality course, they've got semi formal. I've

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<v Speaker 1>already paid the deposit for schoolies.

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<v Speaker 2>Wow, what they're going to gold cost? Aren't they.

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<v Speaker 1>Love at you?

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<v Speaker 2>Tusk?

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<v Speaker 1>Oh?

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<v Speaker 2>God? Where are they staying?

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<v Speaker 1>Surfers a regional deposits paid. Holly didn't want to go,

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<v Speaker 1>Amelia did so I said, if we paid the deposit,

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<v Speaker 1>you can sell that to someone if you get closer

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<v Speaker 1>to it and you don't want to go, Please don't

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<v Speaker 1>want to go. Am I about mum for being too efficient?

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<v Speaker 2>Look, I can't say that I'm in this category. I

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<v Speaker 2>don't think that I been in this so I don't

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<v Speaker 2>even know where this is going.

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<v Speaker 1>This is something that happened this morning. It really frustrated

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<v Speaker 1>me because I feel like as mums, I know you're

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<v Speaker 1>talking about not being very organized. And yes I did

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<v Speaker 1>go and get the school books on the weekend before

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<v Speaker 1>going back to school as opposed to November when they

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<v Speaker 1>send the book list home. So I definitely am that person.

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<v Speaker 1>But I do think there is an element of all

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<v Speaker 1>mums and their organization skills. We've talked previously about feeling

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<v Speaker 1>like the kids pas because we're organizing their lives all

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<v Speaker 1>the time. And this was a great example this morning

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<v Speaker 1>of things going to shit because I wasn't on top

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<v Speaker 1>of it. Now. Jay had booked Amelia at a driving lesson,

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<v Speaker 1>her first driving lesson.

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<v Speaker 2>It's so exciting we're just talking about it. I was like,

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<v Speaker 2>oh my god, mind won't.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I am having a cruisy old morning. I've got

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<v Speaker 1>loads done, washing's all done and put away emails are

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<v Speaker 1>all done, like everything's done. However, I'm still home. I

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<v Speaker 1>haven't had a shower yet. Amelia is in bed still.

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<v Speaker 1>The doorbell rings and I was like, you is it

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<v Speaker 1>the door? You're going to be an Amazon delivery of

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<v Speaker 1>something that we've forgotten about. Get to the door. There's

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<v Speaker 1>the guy for the driving lesson. I was like, oh shit,

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<v Speaker 1>I just said this moment, I'm looking at him going, oh,

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<v Speaker 1>that's right, a driving lesson, and he went yeah for Amelia.

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<v Speaker 1>I went, oh, Amelia, okay, give you two secs. I've

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<v Speaker 1>gone running in. I'm like super stressed from a chilled morning,

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<v Speaker 1>very productive, got so much done, to all of a

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<v Speaker 1>sudden feeling stressed. I've gone up. I went to the

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<v Speaker 1>desk to go a driving lesson. She's like, what fast

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<v Speaker 1>a sleep? And then it was just that moment of

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<v Speaker 1>having no control over the slow speech she's going and

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<v Speaker 1>knowing that I'm the only one now taking on the

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<v Speaker 1>stress of the fact that this poor guy stood on

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<v Speaker 1>the door step and we're taking ages. So I'm gone, okay.

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<v Speaker 1>I took a different approach. I went, what can I

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<v Speaker 1>do to help you? What do you need? And she's

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<v Speaker 1>like wandered into the bathroom, no like urgency whatsoever, brushing it.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm like, don't worry about your teeth, And then I

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<v Speaker 1>have a moment of going, yeah, do worry about your

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<v Speaker 1>teeth next to someone in the car of morning Breath.

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<v Speaker 1>But she's just going so slowly and I'm so stressed,

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<v Speaker 1>And in that moment, my first thing to do is

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<v Speaker 1>how can I attack Jay for this situation which I

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<v Speaker 1>would have been on top of had I organized it.

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<v Speaker 1>So he's booked the driving lesson, yeah, probably told us

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<v Speaker 1>all like a week or two weeks ago when he

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<v Speaker 1>booked it, but then no reminder, no reminder. This is

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<v Speaker 1>the thing Rache with me, Am I too efficient? Is

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<v Speaker 1>this my problem? Because the first thing was this is

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<v Speaker 1>your fault? Ba, why don't you tell anyone? And he's like, oh,

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<v Speaker 1>of course it's my fault. I was like, yes, it

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<v Speaker 1>is your fault. When I calm down, I was like,

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<v Speaker 1>is this my fault? Because I don't work that way?

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe I'm too efficient? Ah right, Because what I will

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<v Speaker 1>do is I will book something in go straight in

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<v Speaker 1>my calendar, and then I remind everyone. Even if there's

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<v Speaker 1>a time where Jane is to pick the girls up

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<v Speaker 1>from school and take them to an appointment or something

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<v Speaker 1>going on. I'll even say that day, Hey, don't forget

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<v Speaker 1>you're picking the girls up the save they've got this

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<v Speaker 1>at blah blah time. The thing that's frustrated me isn't

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<v Speaker 1>that he's done that that way, but it's that I

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<v Speaker 1>don't do it that way.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I get where you're coming from. My question would

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<v Speaker 2>be that what happens if you did it the other

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<v Speaker 2>way and wasn't efficient, how many more predicaments would you

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<v Speaker 2>be in like this morning? So if you didn't do it,

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<v Speaker 2>and then say, let's say you weren't overly efficient like

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<v Speaker 2>that and you didn't add things into your calendar, how

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<v Speaker 2>many more times would you come up against oh mate,

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<v Speaker 2>standing out the door knock block for our own appointment?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh my god?

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<v Speaker 1>Like oh would everybody else step up and be responsible

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<v Speaker 1>for saying once you've got this at this time and

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<v Speaker 1>everyone else just putting it in their own calendar?

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<v Speaker 2>Well, this is the thing that I'm like just balancing

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<v Speaker 2>now as well with Gracie going off to high school, right,

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<v Speaker 2>I operate like you. I go, okay, well, if that's

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<v Speaker 2>locked in now, I'm quite efficient when it comes to that.

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<v Speaker 2>Now I've got a child going off to high school.

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<v Speaker 2>I've got another like good friend of mine whose daughter's

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<v Speaker 2>going there as well, and she's like, well, let's share

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<v Speaker 2>the car pulling. I'm like, great idea. She has then

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<v Speaker 2>generated a calendar for the four of us, so her daughter, Gracie, myself,

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<v Speaker 2>and her I couldn't even work out how to open

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<v Speaker 2>the calendar. I couldn't even find the far I couldn't

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<v Speaker 2>find what she was telling me to do. I was

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<v Speaker 2>on GBT. I'm going what I deleted two calendarscidentally because

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<v Speaker 2>I was obviously special and could do that part. But

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<v Speaker 2>this is like another level of efficient, and I sort

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<v Speaker 2>of looked at that and went, oh, wow, I really

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<v Speaker 2>am letting the team down because I'm only this efficient

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<v Speaker 2>where she's like managing calendars between when the kids are

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<v Speaker 2>at dad's and then at hers, and then now she's

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<v Speaker 2>had another calendar with this mum that's obviously got no

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<v Speaker 2>idea what she's doing, but at the same time, she's

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<v Speaker 2>like that quick and that efficient. I had a look

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<v Speaker 2>at that and was like, wow, I've got to step

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<v Speaker 2>up my game, But at the same time had that

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<v Speaker 2>little part of me going, well, no, Gracie needs to

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<v Speaker 2>step up a little bit to be able to understand

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<v Speaker 2>how to read a calendar, but also then be accountable

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<v Speaker 2>to a calendar a little bit more, because my girls

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<v Speaker 2>are like, what this year ten and twelve. They're not

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<v Speaker 2>efficient to a calendar. They don't look to a calendar,

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<v Speaker 2>that don't refer back to a calendar. They just refer

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<v Speaker 2>back to mum.

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe you and Gracie could go on some sort of

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<v Speaker 1>to learn calendar together.

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<v Speaker 2>The day that this happened, I was so stressed. I

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<v Speaker 2>was like, my whole life shut down, Katie. I had

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<v Speaker 2>deleted all my calendars, so every calendar entry and my phone.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not just by trying to open up this new one.

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<v Speaker 2>Just by trying to find the new one I deleted.

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<v Speaker 2>I thought, oh, look I'm going to be efficient. I'm

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<v Speaker 2>going to delete all these Look at these these are

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<v Speaker 2>all double ups. No they're not, dickhead, don't delete them.

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<v Speaker 2>Because then when I went back, everything including birthdays for

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<v Speaker 2>the next like however, like all the birthdays everything, and

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<v Speaker 2>do you know what I did? I froze. It was

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<v Speaker 2>like my whole life had ended right there. Why because

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<v Speaker 2>my calendar's gone. I don't know what I'm doing in

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<v Speaker 2>two days. Like I literally didn't know what I was

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<v Speaker 2>doing in two days. I was like, oh, I can't

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<v Speaker 2>do anything.

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<v Speaker 1>I look at my calendar and I go, why have

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<v Speaker 1>I got so many calendars? I need to get rid

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<v Speaker 1>of some of these calendars. But I'm not going to now.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't because obviously we're probably putting stuff into all

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<v Speaker 1>the different calendars and not knowing where it's going.

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<v Speaker 2>This was me. I was like, what home and work?

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<v Speaker 2>And then one that just says calendar, and then another.

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<v Speaker 2>I thought, surely I can just clear some of those out.

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<v Speaker 2>This is with my eye cloud, this is with my Gmail,

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<v Speaker 2>this is surely they're all just double ups.

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<v Speaker 1>No they're not.

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<v Speaker 2>They just take out your whole calendar.

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<v Speaker 1>Start with so many calendars. Why don't we just have

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<v Speaker 1>one calendar? Oh sure, I don't put in because right

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<v Speaker 1>now that's like the calendar.

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<v Speaker 2>It's the color coding, so color codes, so that the

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<v Speaker 2>red calendar for me from my efficient friend, the calendar

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<v Speaker 2>for the four of us, so that's usually to do

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<v Speaker 2>with school drop off or pick up and the roster

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<v Speaker 2>that comes with that.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, because when I look at my calendars, where's calendar?

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<v Speaker 1>But I look at my calendar. Go to calendar, then

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<v Speaker 1>the middle like some of them beige, some purple, some screen,

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<v Speaker 1>some yellow.

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<v Speaker 2>Color code your life. Basically, it's color coding your calendars.

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<v Speaker 2>So purple might be work, blue might be personal, red

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<v Speaker 2>might be school drop off. Yeah Australian any, don't delete any.

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<v Speaker 2>And I'm telling you, even chat GBT couldn't get me

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<v Speaker 2>out of this pickle. I had to get Breed to

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<v Speaker 2>come over and get me out of pickle. She calls.

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<v Speaker 2>She's so smart and younger and knows everything about what's

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<v Speaker 2>going on. So she sat there and was like, now

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<v Speaker 2>do this, now do this. Go to here and you

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<v Speaker 2>can restore all thessakes, particularly sot all back, and now

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<v Speaker 2>you've got a million calendars again. Yeah, I'm just gonna

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<v Speaker 2>stay with the mess. Just stay in the mess of

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<v Speaker 2>my calendars. Because when I couldn't see the forecast for

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<v Speaker 2>the next week, I was like, oh, I'm going to

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<v Speaker 2>stop living.

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<v Speaker 1>I'll just go to bed.