Speaker 1: Apojee Production.
Speaker 2: Welcome to Behind the Drapes. I'm your host Brent Draper
Speaker 2: aka Drakes, and I'm Sean.
Speaker 3: Lee Draper and we're here to talk about stuff according
Speaker 3: to us.
Speaker 2: Hey guys, it's Draper here.
Speaker 3: And I was naked on the Golkos Highway.
Speaker 2: Yoh, buddy's made to give you are a strong woman.
Speaker 2: Welcome to another episode Behind the Drakes. Today's episode it's
Speaker 2: for you parents out there. Look, you can be on
Speaker 2: either side of the fence of this one what we do.
Speaker 2: You can look at it as evil parenting, or you
Speaker 2: can be on the other side of the fence with
Speaker 2: us and look at it like, yeah, go you guys,
Speaker 2: take a stand for yourself. It involves a five year
Speaker 2: old who was getting naughtier and naughtier by the day,
Speaker 2: a trip away in the caravan and the East Bunny.
Speaker 3: I feel when I brought this up to you, I said,
Speaker 3: I think we need to talk about this in the podcast.
Speaker 1: He usually.
Speaker 3: I was like, I think people are going to be
Speaker 3: like really annoyed and probably going to try and cancel
Speaker 3: us because they're going to think about their parents. I
Speaker 3: just wanted to cavey out the conversation by saying we
Speaker 3: love our son very much. I feel like we're very
Speaker 3: good parents. We talk about kind parenting all the time.
Speaker 3: I'm the fucking queen kind parenting. I've read all the books,
Speaker 3: I've got all the course, I've spent a million dollars
Speaker 3: in me a kind parent, but it doesn't fucking work.
Speaker 1: Sometimes.
Speaker 2: I don't think you. I think you're overthinking it a
Speaker 2: little bit.
Speaker 3: No, I'm not, because there are gonna be Karens that
Speaker 3: come for us that are like, how dare you do
Speaker 3: that to your child?
Speaker 1: You have ruined him?
Speaker 2: Yeah, but if you don't do anything, that would be
Speaker 2: Karen's coming for you. Doomed if you do, and you're
Speaker 2: doomed if you don't.
Speaker 1: True.
Speaker 3: All right, So let's get into the story. So today's
Speaker 3: just a little bit of story time, I think. And
Speaker 3: we just wanted to catch everyone up with where we've
Speaker 3: been lately, what we've.
Speaker 1: Been up to.
Speaker 3: And this is something that has been playing a very
Speaker 3: big theme in our life, which is parenting and how
Speaker 3: hard it actually is. And I actually feel a bit
Speaker 3: naive because I feel like with alf just having one kid,
Speaker 3: it was so easy, was it? Not?
Speaker 2: Like the fuck?
Speaker 1: It was easy?
Speaker 3: Just like do everything whatever we wanted. It was just
Speaker 3: even when he was a baby, he was just a
Speaker 3: very easy baby. And now we're in this stage of
Speaker 3: life where we're finally, like you know, going to the
Speaker 3: birthday parties and parents are like, oh my god, parenting's
Speaker 3: so hard, and we're like, yes, we are here for
Speaker 3: the journey. We are on the ship, all going in
Speaker 3: the same direction.
Speaker 1: We get it.
Speaker 3: So anyway, we wanted to talk to you about what
Speaker 3: happened with Easter one this year. If they're a little
Speaker 3: ears listening, you might want to turn this episode off
Speaker 3: and play.
Speaker 1: It at the time. That's right, you didn't give that disclaimer. Start,
Speaker 1: you're about to jump right in a right.
Speaker 2: All right, So let's paint a picture here. Look, Alfie's
Speaker 2: not a bad kid at or. He is one of
Speaker 2: the smartest, kindest kids that I know, and naughty. I
Speaker 2: think YouTube kids had a lot to do with this too.
Speaker 2: There's a few brady kids on there that make videos whatnot.
Speaker 3: We don't usually have let him have YouTube kids for
Speaker 3: this exact reason. However, we had it because we had Bowie.
Speaker 3: We let him have it as as a distraction, and
Speaker 3: we went to Japan and so we had the iPad
Speaker 3: in Japan, and this is kind of where it all started.
Speaker 2: I feel so, yeah, he just you know, to get
Speaker 2: naughtier and defire us a bit and argue back, and
Speaker 2: I think, just what five year olds do. It's nothing
Speaker 2: like sinister in it, but it feels it sometimes it
Speaker 2: feels like he's trying to wreck my life. But obviously
Speaker 2: Easter was coming upon us, and we've booked into Red
Speaker 2: Rock Caravan Park, which is the first caravan park we
Speaker 2: went to when we did the trip around Australia. We
Speaker 2: loved it, it was awesome. We also only had one
Speaker 2: kid then. I think we're trying to think of those memories.
Speaker 2: But yeah, we had the new caravan. We were heading down.
Speaker 2: Life was good until sort of it wasn't because Bowie
Speaker 2: cried the whole way down there. It's like three hours
Speaker 2: of driving and he cried anyway, So yeah, we get
Speaker 2: down there, we set up and I just know I
Speaker 2: can tell, Like usually with Alfie, I can just see
Speaker 2: it in his character. He just was on another level.
Speaker 2: Wasn't listening, running around, running away, and I was like, oh, man,
Speaker 2: like it's not going to be fun this trip. I
Speaker 2: can see just yelling at each other and you're trying
Speaker 2: to like not be too loud because you know, you're
Speaker 2: in a caravan park, there's people right next to you.
Speaker 2: But he is just on another level.
Speaker 3: He started doing this thing probably just before Bowie was born,
Speaker 3: where it's almost like he skipped the Terrible three thing
Speaker 3: and whatever you call it. And he started having tantrums
Speaker 3: when he was five. That was the start of it
Speaker 3: for us, the tantrums.
Speaker 2: So the screaming, that's the main thing, was the tantrums.
Speaker 3: What you're referring to is like the yelling. It's the
Speaker 3: yelling from him. He literally has learnt to, I don't know,
Speaker 3: this weird two or three year old behavior at five
Speaker 3: turning six where he just chucks himself on the floor
Speaker 3: and screams and yells and until he gets his own way,
Speaker 3: which he doesn't get right, and so then it escalates.
Speaker 3: And so yeah, you're in a caravan park and you're like,
Speaker 3: oh my god, this kid is like on one like
Speaker 3: going off and people probably think that, you know, he's
Speaker 3: getting hurt inside this caravan. No, it's just that he
Speaker 3: was losing your shit. He wasn't happy again, guys. We
Speaker 3: just come back from Japan. Japan was a really wild,
Speaker 3: whirlwind time. It was a really tricky time. Alfi was
Speaker 3: not happy, and you know what, babe, we weren't either,
Speaker 3: Like we had our mental state was not good. I
Speaker 3: was probably the most depleted I've ever ever been, I
Speaker 3: think for our family.
Speaker 1: We were just already having a hard time.
Speaker 3: And Alfie's behavior that was so extreme was just the
Speaker 3: icing on the cake, the icing on the shitty cake really,
Speaker 3: because it wasn't a good cake. It was tough for me.
Speaker 3: The final stroll with alf I was inside cleaning up
Speaker 3: and drapes is outside and Draper's mum was holding Bowie
Speaker 3: and I didn't see this.
Speaker 1: You were there, You saw what happened with him.
Speaker 3: Alfie went over and was cuddling Bowie and his nonna
Speaker 3: and he bit Bowie on the leg. Now, it wasn't
Speaker 3: like a chomp, you know two to three year old
Speaker 3: bite where everyone, you know, someone screams.
Speaker 2: Because it's like so Bowie didn't even make a noise.
Speaker 3: But we didn't make a noise, right, so we actually didn't
Speaker 3: know that he had. I didn't know he'd done it.
Speaker 3: He's obviously walked over. His little leg's been hanging down
Speaker 3: when your Mum's been holding him, and he simply just
Speaker 3: like opened his mouth and put Bowie's skin in his
Speaker 3: mouth and chomped down.
Speaker 1: So it wasn't like a hard chomp. It was just
Speaker 1: like a slow burn of a chomp.
Speaker 2: I like, he's just put his leg in his mouth
Speaker 2: and then this burst of energy come. I already went.
Speaker 3: Literally yeah, So I didn't see it, but we didn't cry.
Speaker 3: The only reason I knew this had happened is because
Speaker 3: later on, when I was changing him, I saw a
Speaker 3: little bite mark on his leg. That for me was
Speaker 3: enough because previous to this, Alfie's never done anything to Bowie.
Speaker 1: He adoores that baby. He's obsessed with him too.
Speaker 3: Much so sometimes to the point where we're like, oh wait,
Speaker 3: chill out. But for me, I was like, Okay, that
Speaker 3: is behavior that I do not want to see continue.
Speaker 3: He's gotten away with it in the moment because we
Speaker 3: didn't know what happened, and I don't want to see
Speaker 3: that happen again. So I said to Draper, like, I'm
Speaker 3: not good with that.
Speaker 1: There needs to be.
Speaker 3: Consequence with this, and we had to talk to him
Speaker 3: about it and he admitted it, you know, but it
Speaker 3: just felt like at that point in time and parents
Speaker 3: are listening will get this that like no consequence means anything.
Speaker 3: Sometimes for these children, they don't.
Speaker 1: Give a shit.
Speaker 2: You don't like care anymore. If you take the iPad
Speaker 2: of him, doesn't care. It hurts him for like two minutes,
Speaker 2: and then he's like he even goes like that doesn't
Speaker 2: even worry me. Yeah, he's cotton onto it, like there's
Speaker 2: nothing we can do and we're not going to smack
Speaker 2: him because we don't smack.
Speaker 1: No, send him to his room. We've tried that.
Speaker 2: He goes to his room for two minutes and then
Speaker 2: I mean.
Speaker 3: He doesn't like that, to be honest, he actually really
Speaker 3: doesn't like being sent to his room. And we time
Speaker 3: it and then we're like, you know, you can come
Speaker 3: out after five minutes or whatever it might be. But
Speaker 3: nothing was really working, you know when like you have
Speaker 3: a kid and they just look at you and they've
Speaker 3: got that look in their eyes like lights are on
Speaker 3: no one's home. Like he just looked like angry. Hey,
Speaker 3: he liked a little demon look on his face. Like
Speaker 3: whole like there's five days, so things were not going well.
Speaker 3: He bit bowie, this is the day before Easter.
Speaker 1: And then that night.
Speaker 3: We had some neighbors next to us, and there were
Speaker 3: young people like you know, in their like mid twenties.
Speaker 3: I had a kid of their own, really lovely. Anyway,
Speaker 3: I look at the window and I see the mom
Speaker 3: having him go at Alphie, not in a bad way,
Speaker 3: just like I could tell she was telling him off.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I was like, shit, what's happened there? Don't
Speaker 1: know what's happened?
Speaker 3: So I went out, and as I went out, Alfie
Speaker 3: was walking across and he had his head down and
Speaker 3: he looked really sad. He just got in trouble. And
Speaker 3: I said, oh, you know, mate, what happened? And he
Speaker 3: lied to me and said something like I called the
Speaker 3: man a mango, remember or.
Speaker 1: Something like that.
Speaker 3: And I was like, okay, so something's gone down. So
Speaker 3: I was like, you know what, I'm finishing getting dinner
Speaker 3: sorted with drapes, so I think I was doing the dishes.
Speaker 3: I'll go back and have a chat. Sim later on,
Speaker 3: I asked Alfie again, what happened. I'm going to go
Speaker 3: talk to them. He told me some little lie. So
Speaker 3: I went over and had chat to the guy and
Speaker 3: I was like, did.
Speaker 1: Something happen before?
Speaker 3: And he was like yeah, he just called me a name.
Speaker 3: He's like, it's you know, it's all good, and I
Speaker 3: was like, no, that is todd. So he didn't swear
Speaker 3: at him, but he called him an inappropriate name. He
Speaker 3: actually said it to the guy twice because the guy
Speaker 3: was like, what did you say? And then he repeated
Speaker 3: it like fuck me seriously, going to repeat it again.
Speaker 3: He's got balls, that kid, soed god, very very inappropriate.
Speaker 3: I came back, I apologized on half VALFI, and then
Speaker 3: I came and spoke to you about it and we
Speaker 3: were like, nah, this has just gone too far now.
Speaker 3: Like it was almost like the straw that broke the
Speaker 3: camel's back. It was like, Okay, this kid's getting away
Speaker 3: from us at this point in time, he's five years old.
Speaker 3: If he gets away with this, what else is he
Speaker 3: gonna think is okay to get away with? And I,
Speaker 3: you know, both of.
Speaker 2: Us crews, i'stealing cars.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, he's not gonna oh my god. Yeah no,
Speaker 3: but it was that moment of Okay, we actually need
Speaker 3: to do something here that we think is going to be.
Speaker 2: Impactful, just like to reset everything, you know, like something
Speaker 2: that hits him really hard. And he goes, oh, and
Speaker 2: then starts to think about his behavior. Now that's what
Speaker 2: we needed.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And in our house, we're big on consequences, like,
Speaker 3: you know, okay. So for example, this morning, he was
Speaker 3: crying because I gave him a dollar yesterday to take
Speaker 3: to school so he could buy an ice block, and
Speaker 3: he lost the dollar and he came in crying to me,
Speaker 3: and I said, and he wanted another dollar, and I
Speaker 3: was like, no, the consequence of your action that you
Speaker 3: lost the dollar, that you didn't take care of the dollar,
Speaker 3: is that you don't get another one this week.
Speaker 1: And he was crying, carry on.
Speaker 3: He then walks into the bathroom tells the same story
Speaker 3: to Draper.
Speaker 1: He comes back out and goes, Dad said that he's
Speaker 1: got another dollar that he's going to give me. I
Speaker 1: was like, no, that is.
Speaker 3: Not no consequences, So in this moment we were like, nah,
Speaker 3: that's not good enough. Also, he's just disrespected an adult.
Speaker 3: And I feel like he's at this really impressionable age
Speaker 3: where you know, what do they say? Like they get
Speaker 3: to seven years old and they kind of their little
Speaker 3: brain has shaped their like values in life and the
Speaker 3: things that are important to them, and they know right
Speaker 3: from wrong in some ways, like.
Speaker 2: Okay, this morning, he knows his teacher loves mandarins. So
Speaker 2: we dropped Bowie off to daycare and on the way
Speaker 2: through at a fruit market, he stopped ran in bought
Speaker 2: a bag of amandarins for his teacher. He's the kindest
Speaker 2: kid is. He's just got a temper and we.
Speaker 3: Need to stop caveat and we need to stop talking
Speaker 3: about how wonderful kids. We're telling you this story.
Speaker 2: We're telling him how bad he is.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he was a little shit and that's okay, children.
Speaker 2: Are we what was our plan? All right?
Speaker 3: So what happened was we obviously apologized. I had a
Speaker 3: conversation with him. He admitted what he'd said. He was
Speaker 3: really upset about it. He said he would apologize, but
Speaker 3: he didn't want to go back on his own, So
Speaker 3: it took him a long time to go back and apologize.
Speaker 3: Even when we went over there, he wouldn't apologize. He
Speaker 3: was holding on to me. He was head down, really embarrassed,
Speaker 3: and you know, as a parent, like, firstly, not that
Speaker 3: I wasn't embarrassed, but absolutely there's a part of you.
Speaker 3: It's like the ego, I guess, but you're like fuck.
Speaker 3: I can't believe my kid did that. By the way,
Speaker 3: that word he said, we don't say that in our house.
Speaker 3: By the way, it was idiot, so we don't say
Speaker 3: idiot in our house. We knew he got that from YouTube. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I guess the ego was a bit bruised in that moment.
Speaker 3: So it was very hard standing there and having to
Speaker 3: force him essentially to apologize. I just went, I'll wait
Speaker 3: until you already and then I reckon. I waited there
Speaker 3: for like three to five minutes. Ay, he finally apologized
Speaker 3: to this guy. The guy said, don't worry, mate, it's
Speaker 3: all good moving on. But for me, it wasn't all good.
Speaker 3: And for me it was like I just felt like
Speaker 3: he needed a consequence in that moment. So we got
Speaker 3: home and I remember, sorry, go back to the caravan
Speaker 3: and I was outside. You and I were talking, and
Speaker 3: you just go in front of my mum. You know what,
Speaker 3: fuck it. Maybe the Eastern money doesn't come this year.
Speaker 3: And I was like silent for a change.
Speaker 2: It was an empty threat from me.
Speaker 1: Yeah, king of empty threat.
Speaker 2: I am the king of empty threats. I just said
Speaker 2: it to make myself feel a little bit like you
Speaker 2: have the power. Yeah, we'll take the East. Yeah, I
Speaker 2: can take it away, don't worry.
Speaker 3: But I took it kind of seriously and I was like,
Speaker 3: all right, well, I was like, that's actually not a
Speaker 3: bad idea, and You're like, oh really, and I'm like, seriously,
Speaker 3: the one thing this kid loves in the world is.
Speaker 1: What chocolate, thank you loves it.
Speaker 3: Loves chocolate, loves sweets is definitely my child. So we
Speaker 3: were like, all right, well, maybe there's something in that.
Speaker 3: And listen, that's a big call. Like we're aware we're
Speaker 3: sitting here and we're laughing and we're kind of making
Speaker 3: jokes mayb because we feel a bit uncofortable with this conversation.
Speaker 3: But it's a big call because you only have a
Speaker 3: certain amount of Easters with your children when they're little.
Speaker 1: You only have a certain amount of Christmases with your
Speaker 1: kids and they're little, so it is kind of like
Speaker 1: a specially important day.
Speaker 3: And we had this chat and I was like, nah,
Speaker 3: I think we actually need to do this, and Jope
Speaker 3: was like yep, right, oh, but you're also pissed off
Speaker 3: in that moment, so we're like, yeah, yeah, cool, Easter one,
Speaker 3: he's not coming to my when.
Speaker 2: You come up with a plan when you've had like
Speaker 2: three beers that night, and then the next day when
Speaker 2: you wake up, you're like, oh, no, I can't do that.
Speaker 2: It's a bad idea, idea.
Speaker 3: But we didn't wake up and say that. We woke
Speaker 3: up and we were like, okay, we actually have to
Speaker 3: go through with this. So we talked about it to
Speaker 3: my mum that night and Mom was like, guys, I
Speaker 3: think it's a really good idea. I've witnessed, you know,
Speaker 3: what's been going on with him lately, his behavior. He's
Speaker 3: definitely not himself, like something's changed, and he does need
Speaker 3: some consequences. He's kind of getting away with a lot
Speaker 3: and he's ruling the roost and he's you know, biting
Speaker 3: Bowie is obviously not okay. So we decided that's it.
Speaker 3: Not that we had a lot for him anyway. We
Speaker 3: honestly had like one freaking bunny and like a little
Speaker 3: tiny but.
Speaker 2: That's not the case. That's not the issue is for him,
Speaker 2: There'll be all kids everywhere else eating chocolate at six am,
Speaker 2: and he won't be.
Speaker 3: That wasn't my motive. By the way, I didn't actually
Speaker 3: even think about that. I just thought about he will
Speaker 3: wake up and not have anything. I didn't think that
Speaker 3: other children would be like putting in his face. That
Speaker 3: was not a part of my thought product.
Speaker 2: But that's the one that will hurt the moment.
Speaker 1: Yeah, definitely.
Speaker 3: So that night we stayed up talking about it, and
Speaker 3: Draper started backing out.
Speaker 1: He was like, oh, like maybe not.
Speaker 2: I was like, just maybe we give him more one
Speaker 2: and say that you only got one this time.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I was like, nah, you're either all in
Speaker 3: or you're nothing. You can't just give him one because
Speaker 3: I doesn't teach any lesson at all, And you definitely
Speaker 3: were like, nah, I don't think we should be doing that.
Speaker 2: By the morning I was out, I'd be like on thisline,
Speaker 2: like how shit's your mom not giving you Easter eggs?
Speaker 2: That's where I was that I'd fully come out of plan,
Speaker 2: like oh shit, this.
Speaker 1: Is doing me dirty.
Speaker 3: No, So we decided together we were going to go
Speaker 3: through with it, and then I stayed up all night,
Speaker 3: not even joking, like, could not sleep properly.
Speaker 1: I was just tossing and turning, thinking like what if
Speaker 1: I'm gonna fuck my kid up?
Speaker 3: What if like I'm the reason my kid's gonna need therapy?
Speaker 3: What if like he talks to a psychologist one day
Speaker 3: and he's like, I remember one time and my mom
Speaker 3: and dad.
Speaker 1: You know, it was just it was honestly.
Speaker 3: I feel it was the easdemer So yeah, honestly, a
Speaker 3: lot of back and forth, and then I was just like,
Speaker 3: you know what, really, really, what's the worst that can happen?
Speaker 3: He got to learn a lesson here, like it might
Speaker 3: hurt us, And to be honest, I actually feel like
Speaker 3: I knew it was going to hurt us just as
Speaker 3: much as it was going to hurt him. But I
Speaker 3: knew that you have to be cruel to be kind sometimes.
Speaker 3: But that's how I felt about the whole, and he
Speaker 3: needed a consequence. So the morning comes, I have written
Speaker 3: him a letter. By the way, I've got the letter
Speaker 3: here it Oh my god, Yeah I kept it. I
Speaker 3: was like, I want to keep it.
Speaker 1: Just like one.
Speaker 2: Day, Oh my god, he's writing looks a lot like
Speaker 2: your chicken scratch.
Speaker 1: I wrote this letter to him.
Speaker 3: And the idea was the next morning he would wake
Speaker 3: up and I would find this letter and I'd read
Speaker 3: this letter to him. Can I just say one more thing,
Speaker 3: I honestly, I'm scared. I'm scared that people are going
Speaker 3: to come for us and be like, oh my god,
Speaker 3: why's parents ever. It's not like we were like, oh
Speaker 3: my god, how wonderful the easter money's going to come
Speaker 3: to morow Alfhi.
Speaker 1: We didn't gee him up.
Speaker 3: We weren't like we didn't leave a basket out for him,
Speaker 3: you know, like they didn't get full. Like we just
Speaker 3: kind of moved on from Easter and in our minds
Speaker 3: it wasn't happening, and we didn't even talk about it.
Speaker 3: So I don't wan people to think like that's so awful.
Speaker 3: They g this kid up in the morning, he woke
Speaker 3: up and there was nothing. He honestly didn't even know
Speaker 3: until he opened the caravan door that next morning.
Speaker 1: So here's a letter. Oh this is so cringe.
Speaker 2: Dear Alfie. I've been watching you and your behavior, and
Speaker 2: I'm not happy with how you've been acting. Screaming at
Speaker 2: your mum and dad, biting your brother, answering back and
Speaker 2: not listening is bad behavior. As you know, I only
Speaker 2: visit children who have been good and well behaved, and
Speaker 2: unfortunately this year I haven't been able to leave you
Speaker 2: any chocolates. Hopefully next year I can, I can what
Speaker 2: you're good show me.
Speaker 1: Hopefully next year I can.
Speaker 3: Visit at night. I was traumatizing my son depending.
Speaker 2: On your behavior. You are a kind boy, Alfie, Please
Speaker 2: show us more of that boy. Love Easter, buddy, what
Speaker 2: a dog? Easter money? He even said love. He's the
Speaker 2: bunny of us saying you're not going to get any chocolate.
Speaker 1: Listen.
Speaker 3: We wanted him to feel loved, you know, like, and
Speaker 3: that was the thing. That's why I wrote that you
Speaker 3: know you're a kind boy. I'll be please show us
Speaker 3: more of that boy, because I didn't want to like
Speaker 3: make him think that he's the worst kid in the world.
Speaker 1: He's not.
Speaker 3: It was just like we wanted to make sure that
Speaker 3: he knew in the letter what it was about. It
Speaker 3: is about screaming, biting your brother and then obviously being
Speaker 3: inappropriate to the neighbor. So he gets up in the morning,
Speaker 3: you hear the little pitter patter of the feet down
Speaker 3: the caravan.
Speaker 1: I've like looked at draper.
Speaker 2: I turn over.
Speaker 1: I felt you did you.
Speaker 3: Covered your head down, you buried your head in the pillow.
Speaker 1: You can't do that.
Speaker 3: And I was like, okay, cool, I'm on here, which
Speaker 3: you know I'm the one that pushed it. So that's okay,
Speaker 3: so get up. I can't remember exactly how the conversation
Speaker 3: went because honestly, it was such a blur in time,
Speaker 3: but he kind of didn't even really notice to start with,
Speaker 3: and then he opened up and so then he was like,
Speaker 3: I just remember the easter Bundy came last night. And
Speaker 3: we were like, oh, I did it, and I, honestly,
Speaker 3: I promise you. I felt like, come on to spew. Yeah,
Speaker 3: they're in the top and you tried to. You said
Speaker 3: let's leave him one. I said nah. Yeah. We both
Speaker 3: felt sick. Honestly, it was such a shit feeling, but
Speaker 3: we decided and we'd committed.
Speaker 1: He had a little look around and.
Speaker 3: He was like, oh, there's nothing in the caravan, and
Speaker 3: then we were like oh, And as I'm about to
Speaker 3: give him the letter, he's like, oh, maybe there's some
Speaker 3: stuff outside, And before we could stop him, he's opened
Speaker 3: the caravan door and he spotted this fucking easter egg like.
Speaker 3: He walked outside and we were like, okay, that's fine,
Speaker 3: there's none outside.
Speaker 1: We're all good here. He'll come back inside. He didn't.
Speaker 3: He looked at the caravan next to us, and there's
Speaker 3: this little fucking Easter egg sitting on top of the
Speaker 3: wheel of next door neighbors caravan because I had a
Speaker 3: bunch of kids. So he runs over, he picks it up.
Speaker 3: I go out and I go, no, darling, come inside,
Speaker 3: that's not yours. And he thinks that there's an Easter
Speaker 3: egg hunt now in the caravan because he's found an egg.
Speaker 3: So we had to quickly get him inside. And then
Speaker 3: I had the letter. Remember I said, no, no, no, that's
Speaker 3: not for you. He shoved that e thro eggs so
Speaker 3: fast into his mouth and ate it, and I'm going
Speaker 3: we're gonna win the war, but we're losing the battle anyway.
Speaker 3: He comes inside and that's when I was like, hey,
Speaker 3: I actually found this, and he was like, what's that?
Speaker 3: And I sent a letter from the Easter Bunny. And
Speaker 3: remember he was like, the Easternboody left me a letter.
Speaker 3: And I was like, I am dying on the inside.
Speaker 1: This could not honestly like we're joking about it, but
Speaker 1: this was really hard. This is so hard.
Speaker 3: I felt like a piece of shit. I read the
Speaker 3: letter to him, and I was worried about the timing
Speaker 3: because I knew it was early in the morning. This
Speaker 3: is only about Steven, I think, so it wasn't too early,
Speaker 3: but I was worried about his reaction, and I was worried.
Speaker 1: He was going to hell and screwing the house out.
Speaker 3: You know, every other kid's out there collecting Easter eggs,
Speaker 3: skipping around with their fucking baskets, and he's just screaming you.
Speaker 3: You had your head down in the blanket in the pillar.
Speaker 1: You weren't even looking. I read it to him. His
Speaker 1: little head just drops and he.
Speaker 3: Doesn't scream, he doesn't act out like he had been.
Speaker 3: Like honestly, we're talking Alfi's had four, you know, Jack's biscuits,
Speaker 3: and there's one left, and Dad eats it and he
Speaker 3: actually he melts down. That's how bad his reactions were.
Speaker 3: I'm trying to paint the picture of like any tiny
Speaker 3: little thing. He was having these hugest reactions to you.
Speaker 3: He was so emotional. So we were preparing for this
Speaker 3: really really scary melt down in the middle of the
Speaker 3: caravan in our new caravan.
Speaker 2: Too.
Speaker 1: It didn't happen. He just put his head down, and
Speaker 1: which was even worse.
Speaker 3: It's like that I'm not angry at your I'm dissappointed
Speaker 3: It was that moment where he just put his head
Speaker 3: down and he just kind of like started quietly sobbing,
Speaker 3: and we were like, oh my god.
Speaker 1: That was hard. Hey, that was really hard touching him.
Speaker 2: Really, I see kids sad like that.
Speaker 1: No, that was sad for me.
Speaker 3: I was trembling and shaking as I was reading that
Speaker 3: letter because I was trying not to cry.
Speaker 1: He was absolutely devastated.
Speaker 3: And he was like, I feel even emotional thinking about
Speaker 3: now because I just felt like so sorry for him,
Speaker 3: but also I knew we're doing the right thing. I
Speaker 3: was like, you know what, We've made the impact here
Speaker 3: and I felt that immediately. I felt that reaction immediately.
Speaker 2: Did you Yeah, well he's straight away his behavior changed
Speaker 2: and it's however, months later his behaviors just shifted. It's different.
Speaker 1: It did.
Speaker 3: It shifted that day. So we explained to him what happened.
Speaker 3: He was like, I can't believe the easter. My never
Speaker 3: left me anything. And we were like, I know, like,
Speaker 3: that's not what usually happens. You know, he always leaves
Speaker 3: kids stuff like that. You know, he must really not
Speaker 3: be happy. Alfie and we had a chat then about
Speaker 3: his behavior and certain things and listen he's five years old.
Speaker 3: We're not looking for perfection. He's never going to be perfect.
Speaker 3: No child is. But it was just the screaming and
Speaker 3: the tantrums and the huge emotional reactions and obviously the
Speaker 3: biding in those kind of things. They're the things that
Speaker 3: we were like, nah, we need to really get rid
Speaker 3: of this behavior and work on it.
Speaker 1: He was devastated.
Speaker 3: We kept him inside as much as possible that morning
Speaker 3: because we didn't want him out with everyone like seeing
Speaker 3: them all having fun and playing and all the rest
Speaker 3: of it. Now, in true Alfi fashion, he took it
Speaker 3: all in his stride. He took it seriously. Yeah, he
Speaker 3: took this negative and he turns it into a positive
Speaker 3: because then what he did was start telling people and
Speaker 3: the caramera bark how he didn't get any Easter eggs,
Speaker 3: but the Easter bunny left him a letter.
Speaker 1: And he didn't leave anyone else a letter. He only
Speaker 1: left me a letter. And then he came back and
Speaker 1: took the letter and read it to the neighbors. That
Speaker 1: was mortifying.
Speaker 3: I was like, oh my god, oh my god, people
Speaker 3: are going to think we are the most evil parents
Speaker 3: on the planet. Do you remember when he came back
Speaker 3: and started running away with it and I was like, no, no, no,
Speaker 3: bring it back, and he.
Speaker 2: Was like gone, So he won. He won.
Speaker 3: He thought he was special because he got a fucking
Speaker 3: letter from there had written oh my god, he was.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: He was telling everyone about it, which was very embarrassing
Speaker 3: for us. But moral story is I think it made
Speaker 3: it really positive.
Speaker 1: It did.
Speaker 2: There needed to be like a big moment in where
Speaker 2: it's sort of made him second guess. He would go
Speaker 2: to throw himself down and stop and go, oh see
Speaker 2: that day, I was just about to throw myself down,
Speaker 2: and you know, he started to like it started to
Speaker 2: click for him. He's behavior and he does that. Now
Speaker 2: he'll go, you know, Dad, you don't want to be
Speaker 2: going like jumping on the around like wee wee we
Speaker 2: because you just don't get.
Speaker 1: Things in life. Yea.
Speaker 2: And so he says these little things now, yeah, because
Speaker 2: of that moment, he'll be like, you know and it
Speaker 2: was all my idea.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, yeah, that you almost bowled on forty
Speaker 3: five times putting your head down in the pillow.
Speaker 1: I like remember looking over you being like are you
Speaker 1: happy a laugh?
Speaker 2: Oh you came up.
Speaker 1: With the idea. You made me fucking execute it and
Speaker 1: now you are crying.
Speaker 2: Has to read it there. I don't think you'll ever
Speaker 2: miss out on another Easter next year Easter when it
Speaker 2: comes in and he hears the first little whispers of Easter,
Speaker 2: I know for a fact he'll be like, I need
Speaker 2: to put my head in here.
Speaker 1: No one's a parenting.
Speaker 2: Also, guess what Santa's coming. I got Sanna's number. I'll
Speaker 2: give him the call.
Speaker 3: That's actually a really good one. But I think with children,
Speaker 3: you do need to give him consequences. And for us
Speaker 3: that was a consequence. You know, other parents will send
Speaker 3: them to their room. You know, they will take things
Speaker 3: off them, you know, yell at them, whatever it is.
Speaker 3: For us, that was what we felt was appropriate to
Speaker 3: do at the time, and we did it, and I
Speaker 3: don't regret it at all.
Speaker 2: I got a great little kid now, well behaved.
Speaker 3: He definitely definitely has changed the behaviors, and even our
Speaker 3: family members have seen that. I've noticed that he said
Speaker 3: things like, you know, he said to the other day,
Speaker 3: it makes me happy when I'm good, Mum, And I said, yeah,
Speaker 3: me too, Dylan and hers, because I just feel so
Speaker 3: much more love, Like I love being good because then
Speaker 3: I get more love, And I thought, isn't that interesting
Speaker 3: that he equates behaving with feeling like we're giving him
Speaker 3: more love, time, attention, all those kind of things that
Speaker 3: he crazed from us. And that's all children want.
Speaker 2: That's it. Like toys are just flashy little things, but
Speaker 2: at the end of the day, the toy ends up
Speaker 2: in the yard in the rain and forgotten about it.
Speaker 2: But yeah, all they want is just time attention you
Speaker 2: watching them. Yes, it's a hard juggle, but they're only
Speaker 2: small for you know, a wee amount of time.
Speaker 1: They're only small for a small amount of time.
Speaker 3: So take the Easter Bunny off them for one of
Speaker 3: those years, dra and you're going to get a good kid.
Speaker 1: M