WEBVTT - Dan Sultan on His Sobriety and "Missing" His Falls Festival Moment 0:00:00.480 --> 0:00:03.160 Today we're recording on Gadigoo Country and. 0:00:03.080 --> 0:00:05.760 We'd like to pay our respects to the traditional custodians 0:00:05.800 --> 0:00:06.720 of the Gaticol people. 0:00:08.160 --> 0:00:09.920 I know, you've got to dig this. 0:00:11.240 --> 0:00:16.439 It's like I've been given like an extra sprinkle of something. 0:00:16.520 --> 0:00:17.480 You've got layers. 0:00:17.720 --> 0:00:18.800 Yeah, I got layers. 0:00:19.000 --> 0:00:22.759 I was just thinking, I'm like, we're just such beautiful storytellers. 0:00:23.040 --> 0:00:26.680 You're making a lot of sense to that girl. No, 0:00:26.960 --> 0:00:30.840 I'm done to honest to go. 0:00:32.479 --> 0:00:34.600 So today we have Dan Sultan in studio. 0:00:35.120 --> 0:00:36.480 Well, hey, Dan, thank you. 0:00:36.560 --> 0:00:37.200 How are you? 0:00:37.280 --> 0:00:37.800 I'm good? 0:00:38.120 --> 0:00:39.640 So before we kick off, can you just tell us 0:00:39.640 --> 0:00:42.879 a little bit about your community. Here's your mom Boddy from. 0:00:42.600 --> 0:00:46.120 Yeah, so my community is I grew up in Melbourne 0:00:46.520 --> 0:00:51.600 in the city. My mother Eastern Irelander and goldinga Central 0:00:51.640 --> 0:00:55.680 Australia and Well East are more central and Goldine is 0:00:55.680 --> 0:00:59.080 sort of northwest from there, and that's on my mother's side. 0:00:59.200 --> 0:01:02.840 My mom's side, we also have Afghanis, so that's the camel, 0:01:02.960 --> 0:01:09.640 the Camaliers. That's where Sultan or Sultan comes from, and 0:01:10.360 --> 0:01:13.319 some Irish as well. My father's side is Irish descent. 0:01:13.959 --> 0:01:16.400 Yeah, so is it proper pronouncing Sultan? 0:01:18.000 --> 0:01:21.520 I think it just depends on where where you Yeah, yeah, 0:01:21.640 --> 0:01:24.000 Sultan is. I think it's pretty cool. 0:01:24.400 --> 0:01:28.520 I actually kind of love that, Like Dan Sultan, that's when. 0:01:28.360 --> 0:01:30.280 I'm feeling a bit more pretentious. 0:01:30.280 --> 0:01:39.920 Oh, keeping appearances, missus, missus bucket, it's bouquet, Yeah, it's 0:01:39.959 --> 0:01:41.000 Sultan target. 0:01:42.280 --> 0:01:43.560 Exactly. 0:01:43.800 --> 0:01:45.400 Well, Dan, we're so excited to have you on and 0:01:45.440 --> 0:01:49.400 you've had such an accomplished career. All of your accolades, 0:01:49.480 --> 0:01:51.480 all of these achievements really put you in the top 0:01:51.520 --> 0:01:55.280 tier with some of the Australia's best icons. We're talking 0:01:55.320 --> 0:01:58.080 Troy Cassa daily, but so many others as well. What's 0:01:58.080 --> 0:01:59.880 it like brushing shoulders with these legends. 0:02:00.200 --> 0:02:02.240 I sat, I did it. I was part of a 0:02:02.280 --> 0:02:06.760 show and there was him, Frankie Yamma, Uncle Frankie Yamma, 0:02:08.560 --> 0:02:12.320 and a couple of folks from Midnight Oil, and they 0:02:12.320 --> 0:02:15.880 were talking about the eighties and some tours they were on, 0:02:15.919 --> 0:02:18.080 and I just sort of sat in Golden age, you know, 0:02:18.160 --> 0:02:20.600 And I wasn't like, I wasn't like twenty two. I 0:02:20.680 --> 0:02:24.639 was like, you know, thirty seven. But I just remember 0:02:24.680 --> 0:02:30.120 sitting there and just yeah, being really aware that Okada, 0:02:30.680 --> 0:02:33.680 you're like spinning out a good listen. You know, it 0:02:33.760 --> 0:02:37.920 was pretty awesome and funny and yeah, you know, just 0:02:37.960 --> 0:02:40.720 having a laugh about that time, this or whatever it is. 0:02:40.720 --> 0:02:41.720 You know those stories. 0:02:41.720 --> 0:02:46.799 Hey, good people, you know, especially Uncle Troy. I mean 0:02:46.800 --> 0:02:48.880 he's he's the best. 0:02:49.240 --> 0:02:52.960 Yeah, I mean, how many golden guitars is I was. 0:02:52.919 --> 0:02:56.000 Saying recently, He's got to be the most awarded Australian 0:02:56.919 --> 0:03:01.320 in any field, yeah, sports, anything, he would in history. 0:03:01.360 --> 0:03:03.639 And his wife too, who's at the top of her 0:03:03.720 --> 0:03:07.800 game for decades and same as him. And they've raised 0:03:07.800 --> 0:03:12.240 a family. You know, to be a success in something 0:03:12.520 --> 0:03:16.680 in your koreer, you have to sacrifice family. And I 0:03:16.760 --> 0:03:21.639 understand that narrative to an extent, but it's not necessarily 0:03:21.680 --> 0:03:26.320 the case all the time with some special people like 0:03:27.000 --> 0:03:32.760 the Cassadalis. Have raised a really beautiful family, very amazing 0:03:33.040 --> 0:03:36.200 kids or young adults, and both of them have just 0:03:36.200 --> 0:03:40.640 been at the top of their fields for decades. You know, 0:03:41.440 --> 0:03:45.080 that family, him and Laurel heroes. 0:03:45.120 --> 0:03:45.920 You know, it's. 0:03:45.720 --> 0:03:49.400 Beautiful and they're nice. They're nice people and he was 0:03:50.360 --> 0:03:52.560 never heard them bring anyone down. I've never heard them, 0:03:52.640 --> 0:03:56.960 never seen him show an ounce of you know, toxic 0:03:57.040 --> 0:04:03.840 ambition or competitiveness or anything like that. Really beautiful, calm, funny. 0:04:03.840 --> 0:04:04.920 Yeah, talented. 0:04:05.080 --> 0:04:07.960 Well even asked like just a light hearted question about Beyonce, 0:04:08.160 --> 0:04:10.160 and he even like gave her the biggest rape. 0:04:10.400 --> 0:04:12.400 I was like, you know, one of the most awarded 0:04:12.440 --> 0:04:14.160 country artists in our country, what do you think a 0:04:14.200 --> 0:04:17.640 cowboy cart And he's like, tell the truth, we need 0:04:17.720 --> 0:04:18.600 your sign of approval. 0:04:18.839 --> 0:04:19.039 Yeah. 0:04:19.080 --> 0:04:22.159 Yeah, someone who was wined this into There was someone 0:04:22.160 --> 0:04:24.520 who was nominated in that category this year. Like she's 0:04:24.520 --> 0:04:27.640 from the South, so as far as she's an amazing artist, 0:04:28.200 --> 0:04:30.320 but there was someone who's nominated in that category at 0:04:30.320 --> 0:04:32.479 the Grammys this year who used to sing reggae with 0:04:32.560 --> 0:04:35.160 an accent and now they put on a cowboy hat 0:04:35.200 --> 0:04:37.599 and they've changed their accent. And he's meant to be 0:04:37.720 --> 0:04:39.720 some kind of authority. Oh why didn't he get it. 0:04:39.720 --> 0:04:42.560 It's just like, look, it's to their own you're not 0:04:42.600 --> 0:04:45.240 telling anyone what to do. But these are the facts, 0:04:45.560 --> 0:04:48.200 you know. So Beyonce, it's you know, this idea that 0:04:48.279 --> 0:04:50.800 she had no business winning that award or anything. It's 0:04:50.839 --> 0:04:54.880 just complete rubbish. She's an absolute boss and she can 0:04:55.040 --> 0:04:57.960 and that's the thing. It's just like like Dolly and 0:04:58.080 --> 0:05:02.360 just people like that thing totally and they're amazing, and 0:05:02.839 --> 0:05:04.960 there's always going to be naysayers, but I think the 0:05:04.960 --> 0:05:07.360 people that are those naysays, it says a bit more 0:05:07.400 --> 0:05:08.560 about them than anything else. 0:05:08.640 --> 0:05:10.640 Yeah, I wanted to ask, like, when you were coming 0:05:10.720 --> 0:05:12.720 up and you were, you know, first, how did your 0:05:12.720 --> 0:05:15.239 eyes set on music? Who were the people that stood 0:05:15.240 --> 0:05:17.800 out for you as inspiration? Yeah. 0:05:17.960 --> 0:05:22.160 So I've always known that I'm an artist, and I've 0:05:22.160 --> 0:05:26.680 always known that I'm a musician. So it's my earliest 0:05:26.960 --> 0:05:30.320 not even earliest memory, it's just it's just always been there. 0:05:30.680 --> 0:05:33.960 So I feel very fortunate for that. I mean, I 0:05:34.000 --> 0:05:37.360 grew up listening to, like anyone else, whatever was on 0:05:37.400 --> 0:05:40.120 the stereo in the house, but there were certainly things 0:05:40.120 --> 0:05:42.880 that resonated with me more than other things. And that 0:05:43.080 --> 0:05:46.720 was generally speaking, it was the oldest stuff, like fifties 0:05:46.720 --> 0:05:52.160 and sixties, you know music. Dad listened to stuff from 0:05:52.160 --> 0:05:54.320 the seventies a bit Pleetwood Mac, which I didn't mind. 0:05:54.320 --> 0:05:59.080 But I loved Jimmy Hendrix. Obsessed with Jimmy Hendrix. I've 0:05:59.080 --> 0:06:02.240 been playing guitar whole life and he's just you know, amazing. 0:06:02.680 --> 0:06:12.120 And Sam Cook, notice reading. What about roy Alison, roy Albison, 0:06:12.160 --> 0:06:15.000 who's got the greatest voice that anyone will ever have, 0:06:15.520 --> 0:06:18.760 you know, an absolute genius vocalist. 0:06:19.520 --> 0:06:23.440 There's real hearty artists that like, they weren't like this 0:06:23.600 --> 0:06:27.000 stereotypical like pop artists. They were more like the real 0:06:27.640 --> 0:06:29.640 I would take a bit more grunge, a bit more 0:06:29.680 --> 0:06:33.560 like deeper, more debt, like they've been through some stuff. 0:06:33.640 --> 0:06:36.080 Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's interesting. 0:06:35.680 --> 0:06:38.080 Because I think for the time, you know, there were 0:06:38.120 --> 0:06:42.359 certainly pop I mean, yeah, you know, but maybe pop 0:06:42.400 --> 0:06:44.200 had a bit more to it then. I mean, that's 0:06:44.200 --> 0:06:45.719 not for me to say. I think that there's a 0:06:45.760 --> 0:06:50.320 lot of substance to a lot of different things these days. 0:06:50.320 --> 0:06:52.160 And I'm certainly not going to be one of those 0:06:53.800 --> 0:06:57.560 artists or songwriters that everything's shipped now and everything needs 0:06:57.600 --> 0:06:59.159 to be good and now it's ship because I don't 0:06:59.160 --> 0:07:02.200 feel that way at all. But I think you can 0:07:02.240 --> 0:07:05.040 tell there's a difference between an act and an artist, 0:07:05.800 --> 0:07:09.320 and the word artist gets used pretty in my opinion, 0:07:09.960 --> 0:07:13.600 as an artist is that different. It gets used pretty freely. 0:07:14.080 --> 0:07:20.800 Honesty and empathy or the capacity for empathy. So I 0:07:20.920 --> 0:07:23.280 sing songs that I haven't written from time to time. 0:07:23.720 --> 0:07:25.920 If it doesn't resonate, and if I don't feel something 0:07:26.160 --> 0:07:31.440 that's that empathy, then it's it feels pointless to me. 0:07:31.720 --> 0:07:33.880 And I feel the same way as as an audience 0:07:33.920 --> 0:07:37.200 member as well. But you know, I'm not an authority 0:07:37.360 --> 0:07:39.600 on who is or who isn't I know that I'm 0:07:39.640 --> 0:07:43.320 an authority on myself. It's none of my business, you know. 0:07:43.600 --> 0:07:47.800 But yeah, but back then, I think I think famous 0:07:47.800 --> 0:07:51.120 people used to be really talented, you know, And that 0:07:51.200 --> 0:07:52.760 might be a bit of a grab. Don't use that 0:07:52.920 --> 0:07:54.480 for the socialist because it's a bit of. 0:07:58.320 --> 0:07:58.520 What you. 0:08:00.280 --> 0:08:01.400 Had to be exceptional. 0:08:01.800 --> 0:08:04.600 Well you know, you could sing, but you're an amazing 0:08:04.640 --> 0:08:06.840 drammer and you're an amazing tap dancer and like just 0:08:06.920 --> 0:08:11.120 these like talented psychos, you know. And that's still the 0:08:11.160 --> 0:08:13.480 case now. I mean you look at you know, Grande, 0:08:14.080 --> 0:08:18.320 you know, acting, singing, graded impressions, you know, things like 0:08:18.400 --> 0:08:23.200 that funny you know, great comic timing, that sort of thing. 0:08:23.240 --> 0:08:28.640 So that's still present. And as far as Australian acts 0:08:28.760 --> 0:08:35.080 or local artists, yeah, a c DC big time. But 0:08:35.200 --> 0:08:38.000 I hear a c DC and I hear soul music 0:08:39.040 --> 0:08:40.720 when they were looking for a singer this is a 0:08:40.760 --> 0:08:43.240 while ago now. I think they got Axel Rose, which 0:08:43.280 --> 0:08:46.000 I think worked for a couple of shows and then 0:08:46.040 --> 0:08:49.199 his voice blew out and it didn't work anymore. Bless him, 0:08:49.360 --> 0:08:51.160 but you know, that's just the way it is. But 0:08:51.720 --> 0:08:55.120 Sharon Jones, who's no longer with us, great soul singer, 0:08:55.640 --> 0:08:58.440 I was like, they've got to she would kill this, 0:08:59.160 --> 0:09:02.400 you know, thinking those big So that's sort of how 0:09:02.440 --> 0:09:07.199 I always heard it. But you know, there's there's the 0:09:07.280 --> 0:09:12.280 things that's like the representation matters thing, which is absolutely true. 0:09:12.320 --> 0:09:17.440 And i'd see uncle Arch, you know. I remember being 0:09:17.440 --> 0:09:22.720 at a festival, big festival, in a huge crowd as 0:09:22.720 --> 0:09:26.360 a kid and seeing you're the indie and you know, 0:09:26.400 --> 0:09:29.720 that's something that I'll never forget. That didn't convince me 0:09:29.760 --> 0:09:32.480 that I could do it just because they could do it, 0:09:32.080 --> 0:09:33.959 you know, but it was certainly a part of it, 0:09:34.400 --> 0:09:37.160 you know. But I saw them. I don't think they 0:09:37.200 --> 0:09:43.480 resonated with me just because they were first nations. You know, 0:09:43.600 --> 0:09:48.120 there was great music in my opinion at the time 0:09:48.320 --> 0:09:51.720 and now, and I was there with my cousins who 0:09:51.760 --> 0:09:56.360 had come over from Adelaide, you know, and we were 0:09:56.360 --> 0:10:00.920 watching this stage. It's huge stage. It was St. Kilda 0:10:00.920 --> 0:10:04.880 Festival a long time ago, huge stage with a huge 0:10:04.880 --> 0:10:08.520 crowd and big light show and loud, and I mean 0:10:08.559 --> 0:10:10.679 they were just owning it, you know. So that's something 0:10:10.679 --> 0:10:11.400 that stuck with me. 0:10:12.000 --> 0:10:16.360 Wow. I mean I always think about, like when I 0:10:16.400 --> 0:10:18.080 started to think about what I wanted in life in 0:10:18.120 --> 0:10:19.960 my career, Like, was there a light bulb moment for me? 0:10:20.040 --> 0:10:21.839 There was a light bulb moment for me? Was that 0:10:21.920 --> 0:10:23.880 the light bulb moment for you seeing them on stage? 0:10:24.040 --> 0:10:26.679 Or you say that you didn't have like you were 0:10:26.840 --> 0:10:29.320 innately always an artist and you felt that in yourself, 0:10:29.679 --> 0:10:31.920 but there was there a moment where a switch came 0:10:31.920 --> 0:10:33.079 on where you're like, this is what I'm going to 0:10:33.160 --> 0:10:33.800 do for a living. 0:10:34.760 --> 0:10:36.600 I was going to ask the same thing because we 0:10:36.800 --> 0:10:41.040 talk about first lived experiences all the time, and I 0:10:41.040 --> 0:10:45.319 guess we value those like pivotal moments because we look 0:10:45.360 --> 0:10:47.120 back on them and we're like, oh, that's where we 0:10:47.120 --> 0:10:50.200 were and now we're here, Like, what was that moment 0:10:50.280 --> 0:10:50.480 for you? 0:10:50.920 --> 0:10:53.040 I don't think I've had that moment, or if I did, 0:10:53.080 --> 0:10:54.600 I had it a couple of weeks ago. 0:10:57.160 --> 0:10:57.400 Music. 0:10:57.760 --> 0:11:00.640 Yeah, Yeah, there wasn't heaps of music in the house. 0:11:00.720 --> 0:11:05.640 But you know, certainly talent throughout the generations, and we 0:11:05.679 --> 0:11:09.600 didn't have much, so you know, we didn't have a 0:11:09.600 --> 0:11:11.800 lot of things. There were certainly people worse off, but 0:11:11.840 --> 0:11:14.320 we didn't have a lot of things. So, you know, piano. 0:11:14.520 --> 0:11:18.360 I would play piano at my friend's houses. And I 0:11:18.400 --> 0:11:22.320 was really lucky though I could I could remember, and 0:11:22.360 --> 0:11:27.559 I could practice in my head. You know. Yeah, time 0:11:27.600 --> 0:11:30.680 i'd get back to whoever's place who had a piano, 0:11:30.880 --> 0:11:32.440 I've been practicing. 0:11:32.320 --> 0:11:32.840 In your head. 0:11:33.000 --> 0:11:34.440 Yeah, way, I was. 0:11:36.240 --> 0:11:40.559 Yeah, my dad's a musician, but he's an optimist by 0:11:40.559 --> 0:11:43.720 a trade, so he looks at people's eyes constantly, but 0:11:44.160 --> 0:11:46.520 in his head he's like doing music things. So I 0:11:46.600 --> 0:11:50.320 kind of like know when he's like he's a great 0:11:53.880 --> 0:11:58.440 but he was saying, like he can listen to something, 0:11:58.480 --> 0:12:01.760 it's so crazy, and then like any instrument kind of 0:12:01.800 --> 0:12:02.480 pick up anything. 0:12:02.520 --> 0:12:04.280 Hey you've met uncle, Uncle Pete. 0:12:04.400 --> 0:12:07.920 You've met Pete, but saying it's so funny how you 0:12:07.960 --> 0:12:13.840 say pianos in like your friend's houses. Because innately we 0:12:13.920 --> 0:12:15.920 all sort of in it. And my family like we 0:12:16.040 --> 0:12:18.520 loved music, but none of us like did it. My 0:12:18.559 --> 0:12:22.800 brother knows the piano and like he loved it, but 0:12:22.880 --> 0:12:25.160 we didn't have one. So he did the exact same thing. 0:12:25.400 --> 0:12:28.200 He would like not remember music or anything, but like 0:12:28.240 --> 0:12:30.319 he would always go and play at his friend's house. 0:12:30.320 --> 0:12:33.760 I'm like, where's Troy. He's gone down to the friend's 0:12:33.760 --> 0:12:36.160 house to like play piano. And now we all have 0:12:36.240 --> 0:12:37.199 pianos in a house. 0:12:37.240 --> 0:12:37.720 It's crazy. 0:12:38.080 --> 0:12:39.880 Well that was a nice marker for me. I mean, 0:12:39.920 --> 0:12:42.360 we speak about those moments and this isn't exactly what 0:12:42.400 --> 0:12:44.200 you were asking, but you know, to be in my 0:12:44.280 --> 0:12:50.120 own place with an upright piano one day, Yeah, I've 0:12:50.160 --> 0:12:53.160 got that now and my own place I'm trying. I'm 0:12:53.160 --> 0:12:56.840 working on that own my own house, you know. So 0:12:56.920 --> 0:12:59.560 my kids are you know, they work past the piano 0:12:59.559 --> 0:13:02.480 and they play it and then they wanted whatever they're doing, 0:13:02.520 --> 0:13:03.560 and that's just there. 0:13:04.040 --> 0:13:04.920 Yeah, yeah, you know. 0:13:05.240 --> 0:13:08.559 And so I'm really proud of that. And it was 0:13:08.600 --> 0:13:11.240 an old thing that was getting thrown out and one 0:13:11.240 --> 0:13:15.080 of those things if anyone wants this, you know. And 0:13:15.320 --> 0:13:18.600 I was a friend of a friend and yeah, it's 0:13:18.600 --> 0:13:22.320 a nice piano. It's not in tune, but to tune 0:13:22.360 --> 0:13:29.080 it up. Yeah, characters, And every time we've we've moved, 0:13:29.200 --> 0:13:32.680 which hopefully we will never move. We know, changes again, yeah, 0:13:32.880 --> 0:13:35.320 just changes. He's a bit kind of edgy, and I 0:13:35.440 --> 0:13:38.240 just think I can I can relate, you know. 0:13:38.559 --> 0:13:43.760 I love that. Yeah, well you've just come off the 0:13:43.800 --> 0:13:47.160 back of a massive tour. You know, how many weeks 0:13:47.200 --> 0:13:48.840 has it been since you finished? 0:13:49.679 --> 0:13:52.440 It's been what is it, Thursday? It's been one week? 0:13:52.600 --> 0:13:53.160 One week? 0:13:53.280 --> 0:13:57.600 Yeah, okay, he's feeling tired always. 0:13:57.960 --> 0:13:59.400 Yeah, well I feel good. 0:13:59.480 --> 0:14:00.520 Yeah, what's were life like? 0:14:00.559 --> 0:14:04.000 Do you take the fan sometimes? The first show of 0:14:04.040 --> 0:14:06.880 the two was at the fore Court Opera House, four Court, 0:14:07.280 --> 0:14:10.720 and that was huge. So, again coming back to that 0:14:10.800 --> 0:14:13.559 original question, that moment, I think I left that show. 0:14:14.760 --> 0:14:18.160 You know, I've played two big crowds before, but that 0:14:18.280 --> 0:14:21.280 was both far the biggest audience that I've ever had 0:14:21.800 --> 0:14:24.320 one of my shows. And so I think after that 0:14:24.360 --> 0:14:25.680 show is what that moment? 0:14:26.600 --> 0:14:31.160 Okay, that's so and that's it's so interesting that that's 0:14:31.640 --> 0:14:35.480 like three weeks. You're you're such a fully fledged artist, 0:14:35.560 --> 0:14:37.720 you know, and you've done so much in your career 0:14:37.760 --> 0:14:40.320 and you're having that moment now, Like I wonder how 0:14:40.320 --> 0:14:42.240 often that happens for people, if they have that moment 0:14:42.320 --> 0:14:43.640 later on in their life, I. 0:14:43.680 --> 0:14:46.920 Think if you if you're working and if you're going 0:14:47.000 --> 0:14:51.880 for it, you you move the bar, you know. I 0:14:51.920 --> 0:14:54.840 think one thing that's really that I feel fortunate for 0:14:54.960 --> 0:14:57.640 is I remember where the bar was a long a 0:14:57.640 --> 0:15:01.520 long time ago. Yea, and friend of mine, great artists, 0:15:01.720 --> 0:15:05.160 he was on a particular radio station in Melbourne. He'd 0:15:05.160 --> 0:15:07.360 put on shows and he'd have the big street posters, 0:15:07.800 --> 0:15:11.360 and I remember thinking, that is what I want. And 0:15:11.400 --> 0:15:13.000 you know, I've had that for a long time now, 0:15:13.440 --> 0:15:16.360 but I remember that was that was a bar and 0:15:16.440 --> 0:15:20.080 a great bar, you know. But you moved the bar 0:15:20.360 --> 0:15:23.520 that But I feel like the other day after the 0:15:23.560 --> 0:15:27.560 opera House, and not that I'm with completely without ambition, 0:15:27.640 --> 0:15:32.040 because I'm not, but it's you know, I think after 0:15:32.080 --> 0:15:36.160 the opera House, it's like I've just I'm still moving 0:15:36.200 --> 0:15:38.440 the bar, but maybe just not as quickly. 0:15:39.040 --> 0:15:39.200 You know. 0:15:39.200 --> 0:15:42.520 It's just like I'm just I'm just allowing myself to just, yeah, 0:15:43.320 --> 0:15:45.480 be in this space for a little bit. 0:15:45.840 --> 0:15:48.080 Is it easy for you to be present in those moments? 0:15:48.240 --> 0:15:51.520 Yea, it is. Fortunately, I've had a lot of big 0:15:51.560 --> 0:15:54.880 moments where I haven't been and. 0:15:55.120 --> 0:15:57.240 I'm and do you remember them? Because I feel like. 0:15:58.440 --> 0:16:01.800 I remember forgetting them, if that makes any I agree. 0:16:02.040 --> 0:16:05.080 I remember not being in it. 0:16:05.640 --> 0:16:05.840 You know. 0:16:05.920 --> 0:16:08.560 I had a show. I used to work at the 0:16:08.600 --> 0:16:13.960 Falls Festival down in Lawn and I worked on site there. 0:16:14.040 --> 0:16:16.800 I worked. I was friends with someone who lived there 0:16:17.720 --> 0:16:21.040 and we worked together. He was my first manager, actually, Buzz, 0:16:21.120 --> 0:16:23.280 and I spent a lot of time down there through 0:16:23.360 --> 0:16:28.920 the year and literally raking the fields of Rocks Campus 0:16:28.960 --> 0:16:32.440 and New Years wouldn't be setting up their tents on Rocks. 0:16:32.440 --> 0:16:38.200 I was digging drainage, you know, drainage routes on the 0:16:38.240 --> 0:16:41.720 dirt roads, and the stage there is a permanent structure, 0:16:41.720 --> 0:16:44.480 and I would just look at that stage and there 0:16:44.600 --> 0:16:46.760 was I was, you know, a late teen and early 0:16:46.840 --> 0:16:50.440 twenties during this period, and I'd be there all year 0:16:50.480 --> 0:16:54.520 and it was wonderful and I'd look at that stage 0:16:54.560 --> 0:16:58.560 and I think one day, one day and then it 0:16:58.680 --> 0:17:00.640 was a record I put out Black, which was in 0:17:00.680 --> 0:17:03.480 twenty fifteen, and we were booked on the Falls and 0:17:03.520 --> 0:17:07.359 I'd played the Falls a few times before that, but 0:17:07.440 --> 0:17:11.520 this was my biggest record at the time. And the 0:17:11.560 --> 0:17:14.560 spot that I had was like five pm or four 0:17:14.600 --> 0:17:18.159 pm on that stage on the Saturday, which is the 0:17:18.200 --> 0:17:23.359 spot without being a headliner where you're going on last 0:17:23.359 --> 0:17:27.359 and it's like huge, but if you're one of the 0:17:27.440 --> 0:17:34.719 non headliners, that's a really great spot. And you know, 0:17:34.960 --> 0:17:38.800 I used to drink too much, and I wasn't drinking 0:17:39.320 --> 0:17:42.200 during the show, but I was. I'd had a drink 0:17:42.200 --> 0:17:45.000 a few days before, you know. And I don't mean 0:17:45.000 --> 0:17:46.800 i'd drink a few days I mean for the few 0:17:46.880 --> 0:17:52.000 days before, you know. Anyway, we got there and I 0:17:52.080 --> 0:17:55.800 was on stage, and before we got on, it started raining, 0:17:55.840 --> 0:17:59.240 and it just cleared out and you just think it's 0:17:59.280 --> 0:18:03.040 just sort of nightmare stuff. We got on and the 0:18:03.080 --> 0:18:05.600 set started with like a drum intro and it was 0:18:05.680 --> 0:18:10.080 just and then I just watched like ten fifteen thousand 0:18:10.119 --> 0:18:14.400 people come from everywhere and it was amazing. And this 0:18:14.520 --> 0:18:17.000 was my moment that i'd been I'd be on the 0:18:17.040 --> 0:18:20.920 cord bike cruising around with rakes and shovels in the 0:18:21.040 --> 0:18:22.600 in the train and I'd just be looking at that 0:18:22.680 --> 0:18:25.919 stage and I was there, you know, wow, performing but 0:18:26.000 --> 0:18:31.080 I wasn't well and I had an anxiety attack pretty 0:18:31.160 --> 0:18:34.560 soon at the at the start of that set. The 0:18:34.640 --> 0:18:39.800 set was fine and we did it, but I was 0:18:39.840 --> 0:18:42.480 hanging on for dear life for that whole set. 0:18:42.880 --> 0:18:43.920 Yeah, survival mode. 0:18:44.080 --> 0:18:45.440 Yeah, and I missed it. 0:18:45.760 --> 0:18:46.879 Yeah. 0:18:46.880 --> 0:18:49.960 And then I released my next record, Killer after that, 0:18:50.040 --> 0:18:52.920 and I was like, I won't miss it again. And 0:18:54.840 --> 0:18:58.720 we didn't get booked on the Falls again. So that's it. Okay, 0:18:58.880 --> 0:19:02.440 you know, that's it, and I've found peace with that. 0:19:03.040 --> 0:19:08.320 But I remember, I think about that moment and I'm 0:19:08.359 --> 0:19:11.080 able to especially now. I mean, I'm, you know, coming 0:19:11.119 --> 0:19:15.359 up seven years completely sober. Wow, coffee and I have 0:19:15.440 --> 0:19:16.600 some bubbles in my water. 0:19:16.680 --> 0:19:20.119 That's phenomenal. That's an amazing feat. 0:19:20.359 --> 0:19:23.800 Especially now. It's all about being present, and I've been. 0:19:24.160 --> 0:19:27.720 I've been lucky enough to stand on some incredible stages. 0:19:27.800 --> 0:19:30.760 I supported Vance Joy in the States and sang at 0:19:30.760 --> 0:19:34.120 Red Rocks and then it's just the other night over 0:19:34.119 --> 0:19:39.000 at the Opera House and I'm able to be there. 0:19:39.560 --> 0:19:40.480 Yeah, take it in. 0:19:40.640 --> 0:19:40.880 Yeah. 0:19:42.000 --> 0:19:45.080 I had that experience at Falls, but also just in 0:19:45.720 --> 0:19:48.160 general everyday life. I'm able to just. 0:19:49.359 --> 0:19:52.760 Be around you when you were going through that moment 0:19:52.840 --> 0:19:55.399 of drinking and partaking in things that maybe weren't so 0:19:55.400 --> 0:19:59.080 good for yourself, Like, was that a coping mechanism for 0:19:59.160 --> 0:20:00.760 you or was there something you just found as a 0:20:00.760 --> 0:20:02.040 fun thing to do or. 0:20:02.200 --> 0:20:04.199 Do you Well, I guess it's fun until it's not 0:20:04.280 --> 0:20:07.520 until it's not. But yeah, coping definitely. And I was 0:20:07.680 --> 0:20:10.040 speaking about it with my wife before coming in speaking 0:20:10.040 --> 0:20:10.680 about you too. 0:20:10.880 --> 0:20:16.439 Yeah, because yeah, And you know, the fact of the 0:20:16.480 --> 0:20:23.400 matter is has been First Nations, is that we are traumatized. 0:20:24.400 --> 0:20:28.439 And to be a young First Nations person that is 0:20:29.720 --> 0:20:33.919 attaining any kind of success in the chosen field, we 0:20:34.000 --> 0:20:35.879 have to be twice as good to get half as 0:20:36.000 --> 0:20:38.520 much as each of you would know, as well as 0:20:38.520 --> 0:20:43.000 anyone else. And you know, conversely, we're going to be 0:20:43.320 --> 0:20:46.600 half as bad to get twice a condemnation, you know, 0:20:46.640 --> 0:20:49.679 which is all retraumatizing and reshaming and all of that 0:20:49.760 --> 0:20:50.359 kind of stuff. 0:20:50.680 --> 0:20:53.560 You're surviving, You're like, I mean, yeah. 0:20:53.840 --> 0:20:55.600 It is coping, and it is self medicating. 0:20:55.840 --> 0:20:56.280 Yeah. 0:20:56.320 --> 0:21:01.120 Absolutely, it's not until you start that you're actually able 0:21:01.119 --> 0:21:02.320 to start dealing with stuff. 0:21:02.400 --> 0:21:03.280 What made you stop? 0:21:04.520 --> 0:21:08.480 I well, there was a moment that you know, a 0:21:08.480 --> 0:21:11.000 lot of a lot of things made me stop. You know, 0:21:11.040 --> 0:21:13.560 I stopped in twenty eighteen. I had a show I 0:21:13.640 --> 0:21:17.879 was really out of it. Someone reported on it and 0:21:17.920 --> 0:21:21.199 it got picked up by National news and it was 0:21:21.240 --> 0:21:21.840 like three. 0:21:21.720 --> 0:21:24.399 Days a bit of an unveiling was like just. 0:21:24.480 --> 0:21:28.199 Total demonization and like even to the point that a 0:21:28.240 --> 0:21:30.160 newspaper had a picture of me on the front cover 0:21:30.240 --> 0:21:33.080 and they were like writing a story about why should 0:21:33.160 --> 0:21:36.040 we give blackfellows arts grants if they're just going to 0:21:36.160 --> 0:21:38.479 piss it against the wall and you know, things like that. 0:21:38.560 --> 0:21:40.760 I mean, I'd won like four or five areas up 0:21:40.760 --> 0:21:43.480 to that point. It was hardly pissing anything up against 0:21:43.480 --> 0:21:47.120