WEBVTT - Meth, mayhem and marrying a bikie: Nikki Justice Pt.1 0:00:01.880 --> 0:00:04.880 The public has had a long held fascination with detectives. 0:00:05.360 --> 0:00:08.039 Detective see a side of life the average persons never 0:00:08.119 --> 0:00:11.119 exposed her. I spent thirty four years as a cop. 0:00:11.560 --> 0:00:14.040 For twenty five of those years I was catching killers. 0:00:14.440 --> 0:00:16.200 That's what I did for a living. I was a 0:00:16.200 --> 0:00:20.560 homicide detective. I'm no longer just interviewing bad guys. Instead, 0:00:20.600 --> 0:00:23.120 I'm taking the public into the world in which I operated. 0:00:23.840 --> 0:00:26.400 The guests I talk to each week have amazing stories 0:00:26.440 --> 0:00:28.760 from all sides of the law. The interviews are raw 0:00:28.800 --> 0:00:31.440 and honest, just like the people I talk to. Some 0:00:31.600 --> 0:00:34.640 of the content and language might be confronting. That's because 0:00:34.640 --> 0:00:37.640 no one who comes into contact with crime is left unchanged. 0:00:38.159 --> 0:00:46.440 Join me now as I take you into this world. Today, 0:00:46.760 --> 0:00:49.320 I spoke to Nicki Justice. It was a fun and 0:00:49.520 --> 0:00:53.479 enlightening chat. Nicki's a stand up comedian, but that's just 0:00:53.520 --> 0:00:56.840 a small part of her story. Nicki has had an 0:00:56.880 --> 0:01:00.200 interesting childhood. Her father who made a living as a 0:01:00.240 --> 0:01:03.840 drug dealer. Then at sixteen, she joined the circus, traveling 0:01:03.880 --> 0:01:06.920 the country of a family and working and performing for 0:01:07.000 --> 0:01:11.440 the Stardust Circus. After leaving the circus, she started making 0:01:11.440 --> 0:01:14.240 a living working in the minds. Then she got into 0:01:14.319 --> 0:01:19.160 drugs and decided stripping might be more profitable. That's when 0:01:19.160 --> 0:01:21.959 she met a former husband and father of children who 0:01:22.120 --> 0:01:25.360 just so happened to be a biky. Then she turned 0:01:25.360 --> 0:01:29.920 the hand to a taboo artist before trying stand up comedy. Obviously, 0:01:30.080 --> 0:01:31.759 NICKI and I have got a lot to talk about, 0:01:32.920 --> 0:01:35.000 Nicki Justice, Welcome to I Catch Killers. 0:01:35.319 --> 0:01:36.080 Thanks for having me. 0:01:36.480 --> 0:01:39.200 Well, I've had a whole range of guests on I 0:01:39.360 --> 0:01:41.840 Catch Killers. I've had the bad guys, the good guys, 0:01:41.880 --> 0:01:45.600 the solicitors, all sorts of people, and they have been 0:01:45.680 --> 0:01:49.680 easier to describe than describing your life. You've certainly lived 0:01:49.800 --> 0:01:52.920 a full life, so I might try it over to you. 0:01:53.360 --> 0:01:55.200 How would you describe Nicki Justice? 0:01:56.320 --> 0:02:00.480 Oh gosh, Yeah, it's been a lot. Yeah, I feel 0:02:00.480 --> 0:02:03.520 like I've got I've lived many lifetimes, but I'm not 0:02:03.560 --> 0:02:06.520 even forty yet, so there's still still a lot more 0:02:06.560 --> 0:02:09.639 to come, hopefully, But yeah, I think I feel like 0:02:09.680 --> 0:02:13.080 there's definitely it's like different different seasons of my life, 0:02:14.120 --> 0:02:17.959 and there's been some interesting chapters. The circus was probably 0:02:18.080 --> 0:02:19.320 one of the most out there ones. 0:02:19.560 --> 0:02:21.440 Not many people you hear a lot of people say 0:02:21.560 --> 0:02:24.240 they've run off with the circus. But yeah, or they 0:02:24.320 --> 0:02:25.960 want to run off with the circus, so they should 0:02:25.960 --> 0:02:28.480 have run off with the circus. Not many people actually 0:02:28.480 --> 0:02:31.240 do it, so I'll be interested to speak to you 0:02:31.280 --> 0:02:36.400 about that. Yeah, but whole range of different careers you work. 0:02:36.280 --> 0:02:38.880 In the mind, I've done so many. I've like, if 0:02:38.880 --> 0:02:40.799 I had tried to write more down, there be so many, 0:02:40.840 --> 0:02:44.960 because I've worked in mining and construction and I actually 0:02:45.000 --> 0:02:46.919 used to be a project manager. I've been a logistics 0:02:46.919 --> 0:02:50.240 manager in fashion. I've been a photographer, a makeup artist. 0:02:51.240 --> 0:02:53.400 I've worked in like my first jobs for like in 0:02:53.440 --> 0:02:57.240 super markets, the circus, tatoo artist. I've done so many 0:02:57.320 --> 0:02:59.839 jobs and stripper stripper was one of them. And now 0:03:00.120 --> 0:03:02.360 stand up now stand up comedian, stand up comedian. 0:03:02.400 --> 0:03:04.959 Well, it's a whole whole range of things, so there's 0:03:05.000 --> 0:03:07.520 plenty to talk about. We're not going to run out 0:03:07.560 --> 0:03:11.960 of topics. And you also, you're married to a bikey. 0:03:11.639 --> 0:03:14.040 For yes, I was. That was another chapter. 0:03:14.400 --> 0:03:18.160 Okay, Well we've had we've had a lot of bikes 0:03:18.240 --> 0:03:20.400 on eye catch killers, but we haven't heard it from 0:03:20.440 --> 0:03:22.440 the other side being the partner of the biking. So 0:03:22.880 --> 0:03:27.040 I think that that'll be some interesting, interesting chats just 0:03:27.560 --> 0:03:31.160 on the on the bikey aspect. I when I sit 0:03:31.200 --> 0:03:33.400 down with guys that are in the clubs or whatever, 0:03:33.520 --> 0:03:36.400 I quite often say, well, yeah, when you join, you 0:03:36.480 --> 0:03:39.080 know it's basically going to be you're going to end 0:03:39.160 --> 0:03:41.360 up in jail or you could end up dead, and 0:03:41.560 --> 0:03:45.400 quite often that that play plays out. Yeah, as a wife, 0:03:46.200 --> 0:03:47.560 did you have those concerns? 0:03:48.720 --> 0:03:51.200 Definitely, because it's like it's like it's a common thing 0:03:51.240 --> 0:03:53.600 to see you know, your friend's partners in jail or 0:03:53.880 --> 0:03:56.480 so fortunately for me, mine wasn't while I was with him. 0:03:56.520 --> 0:04:00.120 He's been in jail before we met. But yeah, like 0:04:00.440 --> 0:04:03.080 houses getting raided and men going to jail for years 0:04:03.120 --> 0:04:05.760 at a time, and the occasional you know death or 0:04:05.840 --> 0:04:10.840 murder as well is normal, So it is differentely something 0:04:10.880 --> 0:04:13.560 that plays in your mind. I do think, I think 0:04:13.600 --> 0:04:17.920 I've mentioned this when we talked before. Western Australia isn't 0:04:18.000 --> 0:04:20.280 quite as it seems more hectic over here, like I 0:04:20.360 --> 0:04:23.120 think with like inter gang fights and killings, like we 0:04:23.160 --> 0:04:25.640 still have it, but on a smaller level. So I 0:04:25.680 --> 0:04:27.280 don't think it was like all the time you were 0:04:27.279 --> 0:04:30.080 worried about it, but like if they didn't out to 0:04:30.120 --> 0:04:32.000 their phone and didn't come home on time. You would 0:04:32.000 --> 0:04:33.440 start that would be the first thing in your mind 0:04:33.480 --> 0:04:34.440 would start going. 0:04:34.240 --> 0:04:37.200 To Yeah, I would imagine because it's you know, they're 0:04:37.240 --> 0:04:40.119 out there taking the risks or whatever, but you're seeing 0:04:40.200 --> 0:04:43.839 home waiting and you with your husband. You had three children. 0:04:44.000 --> 0:04:45.560 Yeah, yeah, so. 0:04:45.640 --> 0:04:48.599 That would have Yeah, so there was a commitment there. 0:04:48.839 --> 0:04:52.520 Yeah, yeah, Yeah, it was definitely something that was on 0:04:52.560 --> 0:04:56.120 your mind. Sometimes. There was one There was one period 0:04:56.200 --> 0:04:58.480 of time where there was a bit of a thing 0:04:58.520 --> 0:05:02.000 going on between my husband ex husband's club and another club, 0:05:02.400 --> 0:05:04.240 and so there was a period of about a year 0:05:04.279 --> 0:05:06.320 where it was like quite tense and like any time 0:05:06.320 --> 0:05:08.799 they went out, they had to go out. They would 0:05:09.200 --> 0:05:15.360 not go out by themselves and avoid certain places. And yeah, 0:05:15.400 --> 0:05:17.479 that period of time was a little bit, a little 0:05:17.480 --> 0:05:18.080 bit scary. 0:05:18.760 --> 0:05:21.040 So eight years you're with him. 0:05:21.600 --> 0:05:23.640 Yeah, married for a and probably together for ten. 0:05:23.760 --> 0:05:24.960 Okay, where did you meet? 0:05:25.560 --> 0:05:30.360 So we actually met at his biking clubhouse. So they 0:05:30.360 --> 0:05:34.040 were having like a small party and I had been 0:05:34.080 --> 0:05:36.719 asked I was I just started stripping at the time, 0:05:37.160 --> 0:05:40.360 I was quite new to it, and I got asked 0:05:40.400 --> 0:05:42.360 to work there. And then when they told me he 0:05:42.440 --> 0:05:44.239 was at a clubhouse. I was like, oh, I didn't 0:05:44.240 --> 0:05:47.880 want to really do biking clubhouses, and so I said no, 0:05:48.040 --> 0:05:49.440 and then they rang me back because I couldn't fin 0:05:49.440 --> 0:05:51.680 anyone else and they were like, oh, they can't find anyone, 0:05:51.880 --> 0:05:54.240 and the girl said she knew everyone there and could 0:05:54.279 --> 0:05:55.919 vouch that it would be safe and whatever. So I 0:05:55.960 --> 0:05:58.840 went and then the rest is history. He's the one 0:05:58.839 --> 0:06:01.640 who answered the door when I got and then we 0:06:01.680 --> 0:06:03.560 moved in with each other like four weeks later. 0:06:03.640 --> 0:06:05.400 I think love it love at first sight? 0:06:05.600 --> 0:06:08.760 Was it in hindsight? I wouldn't say it was like 0:06:08.800 --> 0:06:12.800 true love last or yeah, yeah, I was quite young. 0:06:12.920 --> 0:06:16.080 I was twenty two or twenty three when I met him. 0:06:16.680 --> 0:06:19.920 He was in his early thirties. But it's funny because 0:06:20.279 --> 0:06:24.560 like most like my parents, my mum had some reservations 0:06:24.600 --> 0:06:26.479 when she found out I was with the barkie, but 0:06:26.520 --> 0:06:29.440 I was quite way with myself. But most people would 0:06:29.480 --> 0:06:31.320 be like, it'd be pretty bad if their daughter ends 0:06:31.360 --> 0:06:33.039 up with a bikie, But for my parents, it was 0:06:33.080 --> 0:06:36.640 like almost the opposite because being with him tanged me 0:06:36.680 --> 0:06:40.400 because I had to behave myself because I was a 0:06:40.440 --> 0:06:42.760 little bit off the rails. Myself before I met him. 0:06:42.920 --> 0:06:47.800 Okay, well that's your poor your poor parents. Glad she's 0:06:47.800 --> 0:06:50.400 hooked up with a bikey. Yeah, he'll keep they were 0:06:50.440 --> 0:06:51.240 on the straight and narrow. 0:06:51.440 --> 0:06:54.279 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I wouldn't say poor parents that I 0:06:54.440 --> 0:06:55.520 was like that for a reason. 0:06:55.920 --> 0:06:58.800 Okay, yeah, well we've jumped ahead because I want to 0:06:58.839 --> 0:07:02.200 delve deeper into into the biking world or the wife 0:07:02.279 --> 0:07:06.320 of biking. But before we do that, let's find out 0:07:06.320 --> 0:07:09.880 a little bit about yourself and your childhood. Where'd you 0:07:09.920 --> 0:07:10.360 grow up? 0:07:11.680 --> 0:07:14.560 So it's never a straightforward Westent grew up, I would say, wa, 0:07:14.720 --> 0:07:18.200 but because we moved a lot around regionally, and so 0:07:18.280 --> 0:07:20.520 between Perth and a lot of seaside coastal towns up 0:07:20.520 --> 0:07:22.960 and down the coast. Because when I was in my 0:07:23.000 --> 0:07:25.840 early years, my dad was a cray fisherman, so we 0:07:25.880 --> 0:07:29.640 moved around a lot and then ended up settling. So 0:07:29.680 --> 0:07:32.200 I had like most of my like my high school 0:07:32.240 --> 0:07:34.720 years and my later primary school years was in Rockingham 0:07:34.720 --> 0:07:37.720 and Mandra. Yeah, it was about an hour. 0:07:37.560 --> 0:07:40.640 Out of Perth for people not from Western st Okay, 0:07:40.680 --> 0:07:42.400 So that would have been a bit of a transient 0:07:43.280 --> 0:07:45.400 childhood to start with for living on the coast. 0:07:45.440 --> 0:07:47.960 And yeah, yeah, So we moved a lot, and I 0:07:48.000 --> 0:07:49.960 went to lots of different schools like I went to 0:07:50.040 --> 0:07:52.640 I think we Canada. It was seven primary schools and 0:07:52.680 --> 0:07:58.120 four high schools, but the coastal towns, like the earlier 0:07:58.200 --> 0:08:00.440 years of my childhood, it was actually like I love 0:08:00.520 --> 0:08:02.600 I love being by the sea, and I've got some 0:08:02.640 --> 0:08:04.800 of my best memories of from those those towns that 0:08:04.840 --> 0:08:05.280 we lived in. 0:08:05.400 --> 0:08:08.200 What's it like going through that many schools? But like 0:08:08.320 --> 0:08:10.080 your first day of the new school, do you get 0:08:10.080 --> 0:08:11.760 accustomed to it or yeah? 0:08:11.840 --> 0:08:13.960 I think I think you sort of just get used 0:08:13.960 --> 0:08:15.600 to it. But in hindsight, I think it sort of 0:08:15.680 --> 0:08:18.600 impacted my ability to like make and keep friendships as 0:08:18.600 --> 0:08:22.280 I got older, because I don't know, I just yeah, 0:08:22.280 --> 0:08:24.600 I didn't. I didn't really have like I've seen. I 0:08:24.680 --> 0:08:27.720 know people that have like the same friends since like 0:08:27.800 --> 0:08:29.920 childhood of high school, and I've never had that because 0:08:29.920 --> 0:08:34.360 I never was there long to maintain a long term friendship. 0:08:34.280 --> 0:08:37.880 But found it easier to make friends like drop drop 0:08:37.920 --> 0:08:39.400 you in there, and you could make the friends. 0:08:40.640 --> 0:08:42.320 When I was a kid, I always kind of made 0:08:42.400 --> 0:08:45.400 friends easy enough, But yeah, I didn't didn't stay in 0:08:45.480 --> 0:08:47.320 touch when I can move on to the next school 0:08:47.400 --> 0:08:47.720 or whatever. 0:08:48.160 --> 0:08:52.280 Now, besides cray fishing, your dad had another occupation. 0:08:52.520 --> 0:08:56.240 Yes, so I believe this was also from quite early on. 0:08:56.760 --> 0:08:59.440 In my just we cover this. We're not going to 0:08:59.440 --> 0:09:01.480 get your father in the trouble trouble here. 0:09:01.880 --> 0:09:04.720 He's dead, so he can't get into any trouble. 0:09:04.760 --> 0:09:05.839 All right, We're free to go. 0:09:06.440 --> 0:09:09.000 Don't worry about it, lord, Yeah, no, no, no. So 0:09:09.040 --> 0:09:11.079 he was a drug dealer for most of my life. 0:09:11.400 --> 0:09:14.640 So so from from what I know when I was 0:09:15.000 --> 0:09:17.679 quite young, he was originally just sort of growing wheat 0:09:18.440 --> 0:09:19.840 he used to do, like the whole he had, the 0:09:20.000 --> 0:09:25.160 whole hydropolg We had a secret garden in our backyard 0:09:25.240 --> 0:09:27.240 that we used to like, I don't think we're meant 0:09:27.280 --> 0:09:28.400 to know about it, but we did. 0:09:28.960 --> 0:09:33.280 Except let's pull that back because I can imagine you 0:09:33.320 --> 0:09:34.880 don't want your kids to know because to. 0:09:34.920 --> 0:09:36.760 Open the Yeah, and we absolutely did. 0:09:38.440 --> 0:09:40.760 Dad's secret garden down the back is that how it 0:09:40.840 --> 0:09:41.280 was sold to. 0:09:41.920 --> 0:09:43.760 Well, we knew it was a secret garden because we 0:09:43.800 --> 0:09:45.960 knew when we first found like we obviously knew we 0:09:45.960 --> 0:09:47.640 weren't meant to know about it because it was so 0:09:47.720 --> 0:09:49.360 secret because it was at the back. So we had 0:09:49.360 --> 0:09:51.560 this huge shed and at the back of the shed 0:09:52.000 --> 0:09:55.080 we discovered that the wall was fake and it was 0:09:55.080 --> 0:09:58.720 actually a sliding door. So it was a sliding shared 0:09:58.760 --> 0:10:02.679 door that opened to reveal a whole bunch of tomato 0:10:02.840 --> 0:10:05.120 plants as because we ended up asking what is this 0:10:05.440 --> 0:10:07.079 and there was all this like heavy lighting on the 0:10:07.120 --> 0:10:09.560 ceiling anyway, so that was the secret garden. 0:10:09.640 --> 0:10:12.000 That would have been like you'd be a moth to 0:10:12.040 --> 0:10:12.680 a bright light. 0:10:12.800 --> 0:10:15.960 Oh, it was, so it was. It was honestly so exciting. 0:10:16.000 --> 0:10:19.120 I remember. I remember the feeling of like sneaking my 0:10:19.160 --> 0:10:21.400 friends in there, like when we'd have friends come over 0:10:21.440 --> 0:10:23.440 to play, like come, I look at the secret garden 0:10:23.880 --> 0:10:26.240 and it was like really exciting. But then we were 0:10:26.280 --> 0:10:29.640 asking questions about why is there no tomatoes because they 0:10:29.640 --> 0:10:31.520 told us there was tomatoes, and we'd always go and check, 0:10:31.640 --> 0:10:36.559 excited to see these tomatoes and they just never grow. 0:10:36.800 --> 0:10:38.000 How old were you at the time? 0:10:38.640 --> 0:10:40.080 How old was I then? I think I was in 0:10:40.280 --> 0:10:42.600 year two one or two, so I would have been 0:10:42.640 --> 0:10:43.480 like six or seven. 0:10:43.920 --> 0:10:47.920 Did your dad get caught with no. 0:10:47.880 --> 0:10:50.960 So here only went he went to jail once when 0:10:50.960 --> 0:10:54.160 I was a kid, But that was actually he got 0:10:54.200 --> 0:10:56.200 in a bar fight and then got arrested, and then 0:10:56.240 --> 0:10:57.920 because he was drunk, I think he took a swing 0:10:57.960 --> 0:10:59.800 at the copper resting him, and so he got a 0:10:59.800 --> 0:11:02.400 few as he got a few months in jail for that. 0:11:02.559 --> 0:11:07.400 And that was my mom said that I told the school. 0:11:07.520 --> 0:11:10.160 So she told the school that dad was away from work, 0:11:10.440 --> 0:11:13.640 and then I let slip that he was actually in jail. 0:11:13.840 --> 0:11:15.480 You're not very good at cheving secrets. 0:11:16.200 --> 0:11:18.360 No, no, no, I was the family snitch. 0:11:19.320 --> 0:11:21.640 You had. You had siblings, Yeah. 0:11:21.480 --> 0:11:23.600 I had a younger brother. So I've got a younger 0:11:23.600 --> 0:11:25.800 brother two years younger than me and a sister two 0:11:25.880 --> 0:11:28.160 years older. Right, okay, so the middle. 0:11:27.920 --> 0:11:30.000 And you were the middle one causing the problems. 0:11:30.040 --> 0:11:33.280 We got raided ones. And I told my school for news, 0:11:33.600 --> 0:11:35.840 I told, like you know, show and tell me. I 0:11:35.880 --> 0:11:38.080 told my whole class and the teachers that that was 0:11:38.120 --> 0:11:40.120 my story, that that's what happened on the weekend. Please 0:11:40.160 --> 0:11:40.719 kick that door in. 0:11:42.720 --> 0:11:46.400 That's hilarious, good story. You would have scored well for. 0:11:46.480 --> 0:11:48.040 My mom said, she picked me up from school and 0:11:48.040 --> 0:11:49.840 my teacher pulled her aside and said, there are no 0:11:50.000 --> 0:11:51.400 secrets in your household. 0:11:54.160 --> 0:11:57.080 Okay, So you're making life health for your health your parents. 0:11:57.679 --> 0:12:01.360 So when your dad's in jail, is how are we 0:12:01.480 --> 0:12:02.240 around that period? 0:12:03.160 --> 0:12:05.120 I think that was I was a bit younger, so 0:12:05.160 --> 0:12:07.440 I think I might have been like five, so I 0:12:07.480 --> 0:12:09.800 barely remember it, and I just remember thinking he was 0:12:09.840 --> 0:12:11.920 working away at first, so I don't know when I 0:12:11.920 --> 0:12:15.359 would have found out he wasn't. We must have just overheard, maybe. 0:12:15.320 --> 0:12:18.240 Yeah, So no stigma at that age, like it's just 0:12:19.160 --> 0:12:19.439 I don know. 0:12:19.520 --> 0:12:21.240 And I actually forgot about it, like Mum had to 0:12:21.240 --> 0:12:22.880 remind me of all this stuff and then I was like, 0:12:22.920 --> 0:12:26.000 oh yeah, and I just sort of forgot right okay, 0:12:26.080 --> 0:12:27.960 because it wasn't for very long, I don't think, and 0:12:28.000 --> 0:12:30.360 he did used to sometimes work away, so it was 0:12:30.440 --> 0:12:33.320 like it made sense, I guess with a question. 0:12:33.600 --> 0:12:36.600 When did you start to realize that your dad was 0:12:36.640 --> 0:12:38.880 operating on the other side of the law. 0:12:38.960 --> 0:12:40.880 It wasn't until I was probably because I was a 0:12:40.920 --> 0:12:44.400 little goody two shoes up until I was about thirteen 0:12:44.520 --> 0:12:47.640 or fourteen, and I think that was when I started. 0:12:47.840 --> 0:12:49.079 I think that was when I was about fourteen that 0:12:49.160 --> 0:12:51.040 I started to realize my family was a bit different 0:12:51.080 --> 0:12:54.719 to other families and Dad was still dealing drugs and 0:12:54.840 --> 0:12:57.000 it wasn't just weed by then, so he was like 0:12:57.080 --> 0:12:59.640 dealing speed and stuff. But yeah, I can't remember the 0:12:59.640 --> 0:13:01.160 exact moment that I was like, oh, my dad's a 0:13:01.200 --> 0:13:03.680 drug dealer, but it ended up being quite open. Yeah, 0:13:04.200 --> 0:13:07.360 it was obvious. Yeah, like I would be there sometimes 0:13:07.400 --> 0:13:09.560 when things were going on, or we'd always be waiting 0:13:09.559 --> 0:13:11.000 in the car and we would know what was going 0:13:11.000 --> 0:13:11.200 on and. 0:13:11.840 --> 0:13:14.840 Dropped off, picked up or whatever. Did you accept the 0:13:14.880 --> 0:13:16.839 family business or if you you said you were at 0:13:17.160 --> 0:13:19.960 AUSTRAIGHTI one eighty at thirteen, were you going, oh, this 0:13:20.240 --> 0:13:20.600 is wrong? 0:13:20.640 --> 0:13:23.280 And I think at first I was a bit mad. 0:13:23.360 --> 0:13:25.600 So at the same around the same time, a friend 0:13:25.640 --> 0:13:27.320 of mine had passed away. And up until then I 0:13:27.440 --> 0:13:29.560 was like a really very religious kid because we went 0:13:29.600 --> 0:13:32.679 to private schools. Despite the fact the things my parents 0:13:32.679 --> 0:13:34.520 were into, they sent us to private schools, and we 0:13:34.520 --> 0:13:36.440 actually went to church a lot. We went to church 0:13:36.480 --> 0:13:42.520 my Sunday, so they were religious figure. So yeah. So 0:13:43.400 --> 0:13:45.720 and then I think because losing a friend at that 0:13:45.800 --> 0:13:48.520 age through drugs, no, no, no, So this was just 0:13:48.640 --> 0:13:52.240 a friend from my Christian school and he had a 0:13:52.280 --> 0:13:54.920 car accident with a bunch of other teenage boys, so 0:13:54.960 --> 0:13:56.640 only one survived. There was five of them, four of 0:13:56.679 --> 0:13:59.120 them died, one survived but ended up in a wheelchair. 0:13:59.679 --> 0:14:00.960 And yeah, ye, so I think all this happened at 0:14:01.000 --> 0:14:03.200 the same time. And so for a little while I 0:14:03.240 --> 0:14:06.560 was quite angry and resentful at my parents because I 0:14:06.559 --> 0:14:10.040 sort of realized because they weren't behaving the way parents should. 0:14:10.520 --> 0:14:12.160 So I was quite mad at them for a little while. 0:14:12.160 --> 0:14:14.200 But then I don't know when it changed from being 0:14:14.280 --> 0:14:16.760 mad at them to joining them, because then I sort 0:14:16.760 --> 0:14:19.840 of ended up started partying myself. That eventually led to 0:14:19.880 --> 0:14:22.800 sometimes partying with my dad, not so much my mom. 0:14:23.000 --> 0:14:25.040 My mom. I think my mom tried harder than my 0:14:25.120 --> 0:14:28.960 dad to keep it separate. And still, you know, you're 0:14:29.040 --> 0:14:31.280 the kid with parents, even if they weren't always doing 0:14:31.320 --> 0:14:34.280 it right. Whereas uh, well, my parents split up for 0:14:34.320 --> 0:14:35.880 a while, and then when it was just me living 0:14:35.880 --> 0:14:37.680 with my dad, it was like a bit. 0:14:37.600 --> 0:14:41.000 Chaos party part what saw of the drugs? 0:14:41.560 --> 0:14:45.160 So he mainly dealt in speed, and I started taking 0:14:45.200 --> 0:14:47.880 speed when I was probably not a lot, and I 0:14:48.040 --> 0:14:50.000 used to I used to just drink it, put it 0:14:50.000 --> 0:14:52.120 in my drink so i'd have speed. But then my 0:14:52.160 --> 0:14:55.000 friends were also starting to get into like ecstasy and 0:14:55.040 --> 0:14:57.120 things like that, so we smoked a lot of weed. 0:14:57.160 --> 0:15:00.120 It was mainly weed for me and sometimes speed. We 0:15:00.120 --> 0:15:01.760 didn't have enough money to always have. 0:15:03.280 --> 0:15:05.720 To make do what you can do. I hope you 0:15:05.720 --> 0:15:09.320 didn't raid your dad's secret garden or secret stuff. 0:15:09.880 --> 0:15:12.560 I did convince him once to give me an ounce 0:15:12.600 --> 0:15:14.520 of weed. We asked him for an ounce. He actually 0:15:14.560 --> 0:15:16.480 gave me half an ounce, but I convinced him to 0:15:16.480 --> 0:15:18.000 give it to me because I said, I will sell 0:15:18.040 --> 0:15:20.200 it and I'll make the money back and then and 0:15:20.240 --> 0:15:22.520 then eventually be able to pay for it myself. So 0:15:22.560 --> 0:15:26.000 that was me joining the family business. But so he 0:15:26.040 --> 0:15:28.920 did it. He gave me half an ounce, and it 0:15:28.960 --> 0:15:32.240 was I didn't end up selling it. I mean, my 0:15:32.280 --> 0:15:34.320 friends just smoked it all, had a fun week, and 0:15:34.320 --> 0:15:36.040 then I couldn't pay that back, so he never did 0:15:36.040 --> 0:15:36.440 it again. 0:15:38.080 --> 0:15:41.800 You ripped off your father a drug deal? Yeah, okay, 0:15:41.880 --> 0:15:45.800 that's that's something something new with that. There's no break 0:15:45.840 --> 0:15:49.000 on you, buddy there. You're dealing drugs, You're trying drugs 0:15:49.120 --> 0:15:51.960 like it's you know, I had a father that slapped 0:15:51.960 --> 0:15:54.600 me down when I've started doing doing the wrong thing. Yeah, 0:15:54.840 --> 0:15:57.000 you've got one that's gone here, Try this, try that. 0:15:57.360 --> 0:15:59.280 Yeah, I wouldn't say. He was the one who, like 0:15:59.320 --> 0:16:02.800 I definite already tried it before I did it with him, 0:16:02.840 --> 0:16:04.400 but then once he knew I was already doing it. 0:16:05.400 --> 0:16:07.600 I think his idea was that if you're going to 0:16:07.600 --> 0:16:09.040 be doing I'd rather be doing it at home. 0:16:10.440 --> 0:16:14.600 Well, I suppose, like drinking, some people's idea of well 0:16:14.720 --> 0:16:17.040 you let your kids drink at home rather than drink 0:16:17.080 --> 0:16:17.960 down the local park. 0:16:18.080 --> 0:16:20.960 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well I had friends that would 0:16:20.960 --> 0:16:23.200 put themselves in Well I was sometimes there in those 0:16:23.280 --> 0:16:25.240 dangerous situations, but my friends would lie to their parents, 0:16:25.240 --> 0:16:27.320 whereas my friend my parents always knew what I was 0:16:27.320 --> 0:16:28.560 doing and where I was, so if I was ever 0:16:28.600 --> 0:16:30.200 in trouble, I could always ring them and say, hey, 0:16:30.240 --> 0:16:31.520 can you come and get us, where some of my 0:16:31.560 --> 0:16:34.160 friends would be like, I can't call my mom. Yeah yeah, 0:16:35.200 --> 0:16:37.560 not saying it was a better way of but. 0:16:37.880 --> 0:16:40.560 No, but it's a different way, and it's a consideration, 0:16:40.920 --> 0:16:47.360 like you see that, Okay, that was the life. Drug dealing, 0:16:47.920 --> 0:16:50.840 stealing your ripping your dad's drugs off, a bit of 0:16:50.880 --> 0:16:54.560 cray fishing, all the shit that goes down there. Then 0:16:54.640 --> 0:16:57.280 you your family decided to make the big move and 0:16:57.560 --> 0:16:58.560 join a circus. 0:16:58.640 --> 0:17:01.960 Yeah, so this was during that period where it was 0:17:02.000 --> 0:17:04.080 just me and my dad living together. My mum and 0:17:04.160 --> 0:17:07.480 dad had broken up, and then the circus came to town. 0:17:07.560 --> 0:17:10.760 And I actually before so I was at the shops 0:17:10.760 --> 0:17:12.080 one day with my friends. That was all the kids. 0:17:12.119 --> 0:17:13.439 All the kids used to hang out at the shopping 0:17:13.440 --> 0:17:15.880 center where they were wagging all before in our school 0:17:15.920 --> 0:17:17.959 and whatever, and some of the guys from the circus 0:17:17.960 --> 0:17:19.760 were in the shops and they were just being show offs, 0:17:19.760 --> 0:17:21.520 like they were doing flips and I guess to I 0:17:21.520 --> 0:17:23.480 think they were handing out flyers and stuff, but they 0:17:23.480 --> 0:17:25.520 were trying to chat me my friend up, and we 0:17:25.600 --> 0:17:27.680 just to usk because we were like fifteen year old girls. 0:17:27.840 --> 0:17:29.919 We were just like ill because they were like closer 0:17:30.000 --> 0:17:33.120 to thirty, so we weren't impressed. So they were trying 0:17:33.119 --> 0:17:35.240 to impress us. We weren't impressed. And then like a 0:17:35.280 --> 0:17:37.639 few days later, i'd I've come home from school and 0:17:37.680 --> 0:17:40.120 I've walked in and these same guys from the shops 0:17:40.359 --> 0:17:42.879 were in my launde room, and so I was just like, 0:17:43.240 --> 0:17:46.800 why are they here? And then because they were obviously 0:17:47.480 --> 0:17:50.080 trying to find what my dad was selling, and they 0:17:50.119 --> 0:17:53.200 that's how they met my dad, and so he started 0:17:53.200 --> 0:17:55.359 hanging out and partying with them for a couple of 0:17:55.359 --> 0:17:57.800 weeks that they were showing and then by the end 0:17:58.119 --> 0:18:02.440 of it, they'd decided that they offered Dad a job, 0:18:02.880 --> 0:18:05.720 and so Dad said he was joining the circus and 0:18:05.760 --> 0:18:07.320 I could come with him or go and live with 0:18:07.320 --> 0:18:09.960 my mum. And so at first I said, no, I'm 0:18:09.960 --> 0:18:12.320 going to go live with mum. So my brother ended 0:18:12.400 --> 0:18:15.080 up deciding he wanted to go with Dad, so he 0:18:15.160 --> 0:18:18.640 joined and because he was only thirteen, so we would 0:18:18.680 --> 0:18:20.359 me and Mum and my sister would go out and 0:18:20.480 --> 0:18:23.560 visit these little towns to go visit my brother and 0:18:23.600 --> 0:18:25.480 my dad, and then mom and Dad got back together. 0:18:25.680 --> 0:18:26.960 Then we all picked up. 0:18:28.160 --> 0:18:31.840 Okay, well I've never yeah, I never thought they'd get 0:18:31.880 --> 0:18:35.200 someone that I'm talking to who joined the circus. Tell 0:18:35.280 --> 0:18:38.280 us about the life of is Cannie in the of 0:18:38.320 --> 0:18:39.880 fensive term, because. 0:18:40.119 --> 0:18:42.879 Carnie is a thing, But there's actually a difference between 0:18:42.920 --> 0:18:47.199 circus folks and Carnie's. Okay, so Cannie ask to circus people. 0:18:47.840 --> 0:18:51.639 Carnies are the carnival people. So people travel around and 0:18:51.680 --> 0:18:54.200 put on like carnivals and all the rides and stuff, 0:18:54.400 --> 0:18:58.119 and they are different. Yes, there, I don't want to 0:18:58.119 --> 0:18:59.920 be offensive. I don't know if any carnie's listening to 0:19:00.680 --> 0:19:02.800 listen to you, but they're a bit more they're a 0:19:02.840 --> 0:19:05.160 bit more backwards. I think they do a bit more meth. 0:19:07.720 --> 0:19:11.520 They look like it anyway, carnival. Yeah, it was very 0:19:11.520 --> 0:19:15.000 different because I feel like, how do I describe this now? 0:19:15.240 --> 0:19:18.080 I'm hearing what you're saying because Carnee is often said 0:19:18.080 --> 0:19:19.679 as a derogatory town that. 0:19:19.800 --> 0:19:23.000 People when you meet them you kind of understand why 0:19:23.040 --> 0:19:27.480 they have and yeah, and honestly meeting carnies because they 0:19:27.560 --> 0:19:30.800 showed it actually happened more than once where that would 0:19:30.920 --> 0:19:32.439 be showing there would be a carnival in town at 0:19:32.480 --> 0:19:34.920 the same time a circus was so sometimes we'll camped 0:19:34.960 --> 0:19:37.320 right near each other, so we saw what was going 0:19:37.359 --> 0:19:40.520 on and got to know them sometimes and seeing what 0:19:40.560 --> 0:19:43.480 they were like has put me off carnival rides because 0:19:43.480 --> 0:19:46.200 I'm like, I do not trust my life with these people. 0:19:46.480 --> 0:19:48.000 Okay, okay, well. 0:19:48.760 --> 0:19:52.879 Because those rides rely on making sure the maintenance is 0:19:52.880 --> 0:19:55.399 all good, and I just don't trust that it's happening. 0:19:55.359 --> 0:19:59.880 Okay, well it's there's regulations and I'm sure for carnival 0:20:00.040 --> 0:20:02.160 carnival rise, but I'm glad we've made that distinction. 0:20:02.240 --> 0:20:03.880 Yes, I wasn't a Carney, Okay. 0:20:04.080 --> 0:20:06.280 So I remember when the circus came in the in 0:20:06.320 --> 0:20:09.439 the town, or came in an area. They'd set up 0:20:09.440 --> 0:20:11.679 in an oval near a park, and it was a 0:20:11.720 --> 0:20:14.280 big thing. All the kids, let's go to the circus. 0:20:14.640 --> 0:20:17.800 What it was Stardust circus with so they got the 0:20:17.840 --> 0:20:18.840 animals and that. 0:20:19.440 --> 0:20:21.320 Yep. So this was going back to I think it 0:20:21.359 --> 0:20:25.120 was two thousand when we joined, and so back then 0:20:25.160 --> 0:20:26.919 they still had a lot of animals. So there was 0:20:27.000 --> 0:20:31.520 an elephant called Anna who is ended up getting re 0:20:32.440 --> 0:20:36.560 homed at the Double Zoo. And there was monkeys. I 0:20:36.600 --> 0:20:38.679 loved the monkeys. Monkeys are very cute. There was like 0:20:38.720 --> 0:20:42.919 five monkeys. They had ponies. They also had lions, a 0:20:42.960 --> 0:20:45.040 few lions. There was at one point they ended up 0:20:45.040 --> 0:20:47.000 getting some new new lines. So they already had the 0:20:47.040 --> 0:20:48.679 adult lines, and they ended up getting a bunch of 0:20:49.400 --> 0:20:53.000 lion cubs so we got to like hand raise these 0:20:53.080 --> 0:20:57.600 little line How cool that was? That was like in hindsight, 0:20:57.680 --> 0:20:59.919 knowing what you know. I was only younger, so I 0:21:00.000 --> 0:21:03.359 don't actually agree with animals in captivity like that now, 0:21:03.520 --> 0:21:05.200 but at the time, I didn't, you know, I was young. 0:21:05.240 --> 0:21:05.800 I didn't really know. 0:21:06.320 --> 0:21:07.800 No one really appreciated that. 0:21:08.760 --> 0:21:11.600 We used to get protesters come to the surface of 0:21:11.640 --> 0:21:14.880 the animal rights protesters would come and then at first, 0:21:14.960 --> 0:21:17.720 because like obviously the circus people hated the protesters, they'd 0:21:17.720 --> 0:21:19.280 be like, oh, here we go again. But then I 0:21:19.280 --> 0:21:21.160 remember reading one of the fliers and I remember starting 0:21:21.160 --> 0:21:22.240 to think about it, and I was like, I think 0:21:22.240 --> 0:21:28.160 they've got a boy. Yeah, the cubs were gorgeous. 0:21:28.520 --> 0:21:31.680 I'm not sure if it was Stardus, but it was 0:21:31.720 --> 0:21:34.919 a circus that came to town round Galston set up 0:21:34.920 --> 0:21:36.960 on the oval where I'd take my dog for a run. 0:21:37.440 --> 0:21:39.680 It was a cattle dog, and the dog would offully, 0:21:39.920 --> 0:21:42.600 just running around the circus set up. And he ran 0:21:42.680 --> 0:21:45.880 up to where the circus was and smelt something from 0:21:45.880 --> 0:21:47.879 the lion's cage. Walked up there. I've never seen the 0:21:47.920 --> 0:21:51.560 dog shit himself, might just sniffing around, looked up and 0:21:51.640 --> 0:21:54.760 this Lin's just staring at him, just yelping, and took off. 0:21:54.840 --> 0:21:57.520 But that would have been a bit of fun. You 0:21:57.560 --> 0:21:58.720 were fifteen sixteen. 0:21:58.920 --> 0:22:01.879 Yeah, so I was fifteen. We joined and I was 0:22:02.400 --> 0:22:04.720 still there when I turned sixteen. While I was there 0:22:04.920 --> 0:22:06.200 and left a little. 0:22:06.000 --> 0:22:09.200 While after, and what what was your role? 0:22:09.920 --> 0:22:12.920 Ah? So my role every day wasn't as glamorous as 0:22:13.080 --> 0:22:14.720 it might well not that, and I don't think you 0:22:14.720 --> 0:22:16.639 were thinking it sound of glamorous anyway. But so I 0:22:16.680 --> 0:22:20.320 shoveled elephant shit every single morning. So there was there 0:22:20.359 --> 0:22:22.960 was girls and boys jobs, so every morning didn't matter 0:22:23.119 --> 0:22:25.280 who you were or what. So there was because there 0:22:25.320 --> 0:22:28.280 was the family, and then there was performers, and then 0:22:28.280 --> 0:22:31.480 there was like laborers and it didn't matter which one 0:22:31.480 --> 0:22:34.120 you were. You the girls picked up the poop and 0:22:34.160 --> 0:22:37.080 the boys had like other jobs. So every morning you 0:22:37.160 --> 0:22:41.240 had to pick up animal crap. And you were always 0:22:41.280 --> 0:22:43.760 hungover as well. So we used to party almost every 0:22:43.840 --> 0:22:45.600 night or not. You know, you'd have a couple of 0:22:45.680 --> 0:22:47.560 days off here and there, but we drank a lot, 0:22:48.440 --> 0:22:50.159 and so you'd always be picking up shit in the 0:22:50.160 --> 0:22:52.360 morning with the worst hangover. It was disgusting. 0:22:54.320 --> 0:22:57.480 So the day, the day to day life on the road. 0:22:57.560 --> 0:23:00.600 So you literally you see him come into town. Yeah, 0:23:01.080 --> 0:23:02.919 settle all up. So it looks like a lot of 0:23:02.960 --> 0:23:05.680 work was set up performance, yeah, and then it's pack 0:23:05.760 --> 0:23:06.640 up and yeah. 0:23:06.720 --> 0:23:09.320 So sometimes in a bigger town you would stay for 0:23:09.480 --> 0:23:12.720 a week or sometimes even two. But in smaller towns 0:23:13.240 --> 0:23:15.919 so we did, we do what we'd call one nighters. 0:23:15.920 --> 0:23:19.800 So you'd drive to a town, set up and do 0:23:19.880 --> 0:23:22.160 the show, and then that night you would pack down 0:23:22.400 --> 0:23:24.639 the tent that night, and then in the morning you 0:23:24.720 --> 0:23:26.359 do a clean up and then everyone be on the 0:23:26.440 --> 0:23:28.960 road to do it all again that night at another town. 0:23:29.280 --> 0:23:31.800 Long days hard, yeah, yeah, so there was a lot 0:23:31.800 --> 0:23:33.840 of there was. We did a lot of one nighters 0:23:33.880 --> 0:23:36.280 in Wa because Wa so big, lots of small town 0:23:36.359 --> 0:23:38.840 so we covered a lot because I was with the 0:23:38.880 --> 0:23:41.560 circus for almost I want to say almost a year, 0:23:42.080 --> 0:23:43.840 but I think a lot of that was in w A. 0:23:43.920 --> 0:23:46.520 I don't know exactly how long we were there for, 0:23:47.000 --> 0:23:49.200 but yeah, we did a lot of one nighters. And 0:23:49.240 --> 0:23:52.280 then when we were at when we were somewhere like 0:23:52.320 --> 0:23:54.600 for longer. It was good because that was when we 0:23:54.640 --> 0:23:57.600 actually got to So I was besides like cleaning up 0:23:57.640 --> 0:23:59.439 Elephant Pooh, and I used to help in the canteen 0:23:59.480 --> 0:24:01.320 and look after the kids. But I was also a 0:24:01.320 --> 0:24:04.760 training acrobat, so I was I was trying to learn 0:24:04.800 --> 0:24:07.000 the trapeze and I almost got there, but I couldn't. 0:24:07.440 --> 0:24:09.199 I never ended up getting I used to have this 0:24:09.240 --> 0:24:12.080 little in air fit on my way back to the bar, 0:24:12.200 --> 0:24:16.800 so you'd get you there's so many different parts of 0:24:16.960 --> 0:24:20.000 going on the trapeze and each learning each part is terrifying. 0:24:20.040 --> 0:24:22.399 So the first part you have to learn is to 0:24:22.760 --> 0:24:26.360 actually leave the So you're standing up really high obviously 0:24:26.400 --> 0:24:28.760 on this platform, and then there's a bar there that 0:24:28.800 --> 0:24:30.840 you have to grab, and there's a moment where you 0:24:30.840 --> 0:24:33.320 grab the bar and then for a few seconds when 0:24:33.359 --> 0:24:35.919 you're pulling it towards you, you're not holding on to anything. 0:24:35.920 --> 0:24:39.080 That's it's terrifying. So that's the first hurdle you have 0:24:39.080 --> 0:24:40.560 to get over, and then you learn that part, and 0:24:40.560 --> 0:24:43.320 then you go for a swing and then and then 0:24:43.320 --> 0:24:45.399 the next part after learning how to do the swing, 0:24:45.640 --> 0:24:47.960 is to then get caught. And then after you get caught, 0:24:47.960 --> 0:24:49.399 you got to learn how to get thrown back to 0:24:49.400 --> 0:24:52.720 the bar. And that was the part that I never nailed. 0:24:52.920 --> 0:24:54.479 Every time I would get thrown back to the bar, 0:24:54.760 --> 0:24:57.000 like have a little fit. 0:24:58.800 --> 0:25:01.720 I can understand. And that's of the catching nets underneath. 0:25:01.840 --> 0:25:05.080 So yeah, yeah, it's really because because you can see 0:25:05.080 --> 0:25:08.040 through the net, it's even though you know it's there, 0:25:08.560 --> 0:25:11.280 it really your brain is feeling like you're going to 0:25:11.320 --> 0:25:15.440 go splat, but you don't. But that was actually really fun, 0:25:15.480 --> 0:25:17.520 like once you once you got over the initial fear, 0:25:18.280 --> 0:25:21.359 it started to become fun. But yeah, we didn't actually 0:25:21.359 --> 0:25:23.679 get to do that often because we were moving so much. 0:25:24.320 --> 0:25:28.840 And I was also learning to do a da gio act, 0:25:28.880 --> 0:25:31.560 which is where you get a muscleman throws you around 0:25:31.600 --> 0:25:35.199 in the air for doing tricks just like handstands or 0:25:35.200 --> 0:25:38.199 holding you in certain positions and stuff and flipping you around. 0:25:38.480 --> 0:25:41.400 Because there was a like crabat there that was pregnant, 0:25:41.400 --> 0:25:42.800 so I was being trained to replace. 0:25:43.400 --> 0:25:46.639 Okay, and that's everyone that travels with the circus is 0:25:46.680 --> 0:25:48.040 working or got some something. 0:25:48.119 --> 0:25:52.239 Yeah, most people, most people there's so you have. There 0:25:52.280 --> 0:25:54.800 was a few international acts that would come over to 0:25:54.840 --> 0:25:57.359 join the circus just as performers, but everyone else that 0:25:57.400 --> 0:26:01.000 would join genuinely would join as a corral laborer and 0:26:01.040 --> 0:26:03.719 then they'd start learning, they'd learn an act, and then 0:26:03.800 --> 0:26:05.840 most people ended up doing something in the. 0:26:05.760 --> 0:26:09.560 Show, doing something. Yeah, okay, your brother he became a clown. 0:26:09.640 --> 0:26:13.040 Yes, my brother started clowning brother. Yeah, so he was 0:26:13.080 --> 0:26:15.960 only like thirteen and he became a clown. And because 0:26:16.000 --> 0:26:18.520 he was always in full clown, so I don't think 0:26:18.520 --> 0:26:21.399 people realized he was thirteen. So like we'd be like 0:26:21.560 --> 0:26:24.159 hanging out afterwards drinking and someone some girl would be like, 0:26:24.320 --> 0:26:26.480 who's the little one. I'd like, stay away from him. 0:26:26.680 --> 0:26:31.199 He's too young, a year old picking up women in 0:26:31.240 --> 0:26:35.240 the clown sit? Okay, what so the characters experience there's 0:26:35.280 --> 0:26:37.159 any funny stories or things that? 0:26:37.440 --> 0:26:40.000 So many, so many, it was insane. There was this 0:26:40.080 --> 0:26:43.040 man there I can't even remember his name, but he 0:26:43.119 --> 0:26:45.560 was really he was really cagey about who he was 0:26:45.600 --> 0:26:47.399 and where he was from in his past. And I 0:26:47.400 --> 0:26:50.400 think I think some people probably would have joined the transit, 0:26:50.440 --> 0:26:52.320 you know, the circus for that transient liafetele because they're 0:26:52.400 --> 0:26:54.960 unning for something. Because there was this one guy in particularly, 0:26:54.960 --> 0:26:57.360 we always used to think he's done something, like he's 0:26:57.400 --> 0:27:00.439 on the run from something, because he was just really 0:27:01.320 --> 0:27:03.320 really shut down when you try and ask him about 0:27:03.320 --> 0:27:04.800 his past or where he is from. 0:27:05.200 --> 0:27:07.800 A lot of mystery. There isn't run away to the 0:27:07.840 --> 0:27:10.560 French Foreign Legion or run away to the circus. Yeah, 0:27:10.720 --> 0:27:12.919 how did that come to come to an end. 0:27:13.480 --> 0:27:17.200 So my parents left first. They left and my siblings 0:27:17.280 --> 0:27:20.400 left about maybe eight months into it, and by then 0:27:20.560 --> 0:27:24.360 we traveled all the way up to North Queensland. And 0:27:24.960 --> 0:27:27.720 so my mum actually got into a fight, like a 0:27:27.760 --> 0:27:31.640 punch up. They got into like a scrap and so 0:27:32.840 --> 0:27:35.080 I don't even remember. I remember watching it. I was 0:27:35.080 --> 0:27:38.120 standing there. I was there, and I think I think 0:27:38.160 --> 0:27:41.280 she was having an argument and I don't remember exactly 0:27:41.320 --> 0:27:44.399 what it was about, but I don't know. It just 0:27:45.720 --> 0:27:49.240 it just happened. They were punching on and they were 0:27:49.240 --> 0:27:52.119 both strong women, they were both fit, they were both strong, 0:27:52.200 --> 0:27:54.439 so I think I think they gave each other a 0:27:54.440 --> 0:27:58.040 good crack and then so that was it. Immediately, obviously 0:27:58.119 --> 0:28:00.280 my family was leaving, but I decided to stay because 0:28:00.320 --> 0:28:03.719 at the time I just turned sixteen, which meant legally 0:28:03.760 --> 0:28:05.439 I was allowed to move out of. 0:28:05.440 --> 0:28:07.040 Home travel with a circus. 0:28:07.200 --> 0:28:10.320 Yeah, and I didn't really get along very well with 0:28:10.359 --> 0:28:14.480 my mum at that time, so I was like, oh, yeah, 0:28:14.520 --> 0:28:17.600 I decided to stay. And they left and then I 0:28:17.680 --> 0:28:21.000 was there for a few months by myself. But I 0:28:21.040 --> 0:28:23.680 actually it wasn't a good environment and I ended up 0:28:23.920 --> 0:28:25.800 I was struggling with my mental health and I ended 0:28:25.880 --> 0:28:30.800 up so I attempted to take my life, but it 0:28:30.800 --> 0:28:32.920 didn't work. I have jokes about this as well, because 0:28:33.200 --> 0:28:35.919 nothing's off limits. And then it was after that that 0:28:35.960 --> 0:28:39.360 I was like when I survived, I spoke to my 0:28:39.400 --> 0:28:42.200 sister back home and decided to leave because I was 0:28:42.480 --> 0:28:45.200 quite unhappy. So I moved back to Perth by myself 0:28:45.320 --> 0:28:47.400 or with my sister. My sister and I lived together. 0:28:47.560 --> 0:28:50.320 You're struggling with mental health, but yeah, I tried to 0:28:50.360 --> 0:28:52.680 take your own life. What things must have been pretty 0:28:52.680 --> 0:28:53.760 grim for or what. 0:28:54.400 --> 0:28:56.680 I think before we even enjoyed the circus, I was 0:28:56.720 --> 0:28:59.800 already quite unhappy. I think, you know, that discovery of 0:28:59.800 --> 0:29:01.760 your parents being not who they you know, not what 0:29:01.840 --> 0:29:04.040 you thought they were, and I was still quite I 0:29:04.080 --> 0:29:06.680 think I was quite angry and upset at my parents, 0:29:06.800 --> 0:29:09.520 but also you know, my friend having passed away. I 0:29:09.520 --> 0:29:13.520 don't know. I just my teenage years was quite. I was. 0:29:13.720 --> 0:29:16.200 I struggled a lot with my mental health in my teens, 0:29:16.200 --> 0:29:19.160 and I used to self harm and stuff. Before emos 0:29:19.160 --> 0:29:20.480 were in old. 0:29:22.160 --> 0:29:22.560 You weren't. 0:29:22.720 --> 0:29:28.440 It wasn't a trend. Yeah, but yeah, I don't even 0:29:28.480 --> 0:29:31.640 know exactly why I was so unhappy. But yeah, I 0:29:31.680 --> 0:29:34.880 think it was a combination of yeah, my the things 0:29:34.880 --> 0:29:38.240 my parents were doing, and feeling like I think because 0:29:38.600 --> 0:29:41.760 things like I gloss over my childhood a lot, especially 0:29:41.760 --> 0:29:43.800 because I have a show to talk about my childhood, 0:29:44.000 --> 0:29:46.120 I gloss over things. But there were definitely periods where 0:29:46.120 --> 0:29:49.680 it wasn't good, and uh, yeah, I think that obviously 0:29:49.720 --> 0:29:53.720 impacted me a bit, and and my parents being they 0:29:53.720 --> 0:29:55.520 were not happy either, So there was a lot of 0:29:56.280 --> 0:29:58.640 it was quite a volatile home sometimes yeah, yeah. 0:29:58.520 --> 0:30:01.520 Okay, well it's not it's yeah, we're lucky if we 0:30:01.760 --> 0:30:03.680 grow up in an environment where you got the care 0:30:03.800 --> 0:30:08.920 and not the volatile type of situations you had. And yeah, 0:30:09.000 --> 0:30:11.959 you have an expectation that your dad's not dealing drugs 0:30:12.000 --> 0:30:13.280 and different things. 0:30:13.320 --> 0:30:15.600 But yeah, look, I don't think I cared as much 0:30:15.600 --> 0:30:16.320 about the dealing. 0:30:16.360 --> 0:30:19.520 It was the taking, Okay, on that, like, there would 0:30:19.560 --> 0:30:21.680 have been times when they yeah, you would have had 0:30:21.680 --> 0:30:23.200 to look after them because they're. 0:30:23.520 --> 0:30:25.680 Yeah, or more so just look after ourselves, because there 0:30:25.720 --> 0:30:28.880 was definitely periods where they took too much and they 0:30:28.880 --> 0:30:30.920 would you know, have venders and not coming out of 0:30:30.960 --> 0:30:32.479 their room for days and then when they did come 0:30:32.480 --> 0:30:33.800 out of the room, they'd be coming down, so they'd 0:30:33.840 --> 0:30:38.280 been grumpy. So yeah, there was there was definitely a 0:30:38.280 --> 0:30:40.440 period of time where we kind of just looked after ourselves. 0:30:40.760 --> 0:30:43.120 And did you share that with your siblings, your sister 0:30:43.160 --> 0:30:43.520 and your. 0:30:43.400 --> 0:30:46.960 Brother, probably more so me and my sister. My sister, 0:30:47.200 --> 0:30:49.200 her version of events is that she looked after us, 0:30:50.360 --> 0:30:52.400 which maybe she was a little bit older, so she 0:30:52.680 --> 0:30:55.840 you know, she probably I think as siblings often experience 0:30:56.320 --> 0:30:59.360 childhood differently to each other. Like I've spoken, you know, 0:30:59.440 --> 0:31:01.200 as I got old, us had chats with my brother 0:31:01.240 --> 0:31:03.480 and you know, learned things from him and his perspective 0:31:03.480 --> 0:31:06.560 that I never considered. By the time he was going 0:31:06.640 --> 0:31:09.080 you know, through his teenage years, and my sister had left, 0:31:09.120 --> 0:31:11.480 so he was on his own with my parents. But 0:31:11.520 --> 0:31:13.840 by then they'd you know, joined the circus and then 0:31:13.840 --> 0:31:16.840 they left the circus. But then so, yeah, he had 0:31:16.880 --> 0:31:19.320 his own, he had his own experiences of childhood without us. 0:31:19.440 --> 0:31:24.440 Yeah as well, makes sense. Yeah, okay, well you've you've 0:31:25.240 --> 0:31:28.440 left the circus, you're going through some turmoil, gone back 0:31:28.480 --> 0:31:33.520 to Western Australia. Yeah, okay, what where did the Nikki's 0:31:33.840 --> 0:31:35.800 Excellent Adventure gave from me, so. 0:31:35.800 --> 0:31:37.440 Me and my sister got a house together. So we 0:31:37.440 --> 0:31:39.440 were sixteen and eighteen, and we managed to get a 0:31:39.440 --> 0:31:43.160 little rental ourselves right near my right up the road 0:31:43.200 --> 0:31:45.120 from my nana's house, because we moved in with my 0:31:45.160 --> 0:31:50.360 nana at first, and then my sister, so she didn't 0:31:50.360 --> 0:31:52.520 plan this, so we I think it might have been. 0:31:52.920 --> 0:31:55.240 I think we both when I left the circus because 0:31:55.240 --> 0:31:57.560 we're in Queensland. When I decided to leave, my sister 0:31:57.600 --> 0:31:59.320 flew over and she was going to fly back with me, 0:31:59.560 --> 0:32:01.640 and we just ided to go and visit mom and 0:32:01.680 --> 0:32:03.920 dad and then you because they had settled down in 0:32:03.960 --> 0:32:07.920 this town, beautiful little rain for ust town, and so 0:32:07.960 --> 0:32:10.720 we were visiting them there before we flew back to 0:32:10.760 --> 0:32:14.240 Perth and we've moved in together, and then she suddenly 0:32:14.280 --> 0:32:16.800 found out she's pregnant at about I think she was 0:32:16.840 --> 0:32:18.920 like two months into it. And I said, I will 0:32:18.920 --> 0:32:20.600 help you raise a baby, and I'll be the dad 0:32:22.080 --> 0:32:24.320 like I said I would I would, you know, I'll 0:32:24.360 --> 0:32:26.320 go to work, I'll bring home the income. So we've 0:32:26.320 --> 0:32:28.600 got a house together, and I got a job and 0:32:29.200 --> 0:32:31.960 I was earning like seven dollars an hour or something 0:32:31.960 --> 0:32:32.800 at a sleepermarket. 0:32:33.000 --> 0:32:35.560 I'm just looking at my introduction. Had I didn't say 0:32:35.560 --> 0:32:37.400 that you also became a young father? 0:32:37.720 --> 0:32:37.920 Yeah? 0:32:39.200 --> 0:32:39.480 Okay? 0:32:40.000 --> 0:32:43.280 And then but then I we had a falling out. 0:32:43.400 --> 0:32:45.880 So so my sister ended up moving back to Queensland 0:32:45.880 --> 0:32:48.360 and she ended up getting with the guy who fathered 0:32:48.360 --> 0:32:51.080 the baby and they ended up having another baby. So 0:32:51.080 --> 0:32:54.560 my sister moved back, I don't know just before, so 0:32:54.680 --> 0:32:56.880 I think that only lasted maybe seven or eight months 0:32:56.920 --> 0:32:58.760 because she moved back just before she had the baby, 0:32:58.800 --> 0:33:01.400 so she was like ready to pop and she moved back. 0:33:02.240 --> 0:33:05.040 We were still getting along, but we'd fallen out over 0:33:05.280 --> 0:33:07.400 me having a much older boyfriend that she didn't approve of, 0:33:08.800 --> 0:33:11.400 which fair enough at the time, I thought she was 0:33:11.440 --> 0:33:14.920 just you know, being judgmental. How were you and I 0:33:14.960 --> 0:33:20.240 would have been sixteen seventeen and he was like almost thirty. 0:33:20.480 --> 0:33:21.560 Big life difference. 0:33:21.880 --> 0:33:24.920 Yeah yeah, but AMA's materna for my age. 0:33:25.920 --> 0:33:27.240 Look at your life choices. 0:33:29.040 --> 0:33:31.600 So she moved back, and then what did I do? 0:33:31.680 --> 0:33:31.840 Then? 0:33:32.520 --> 0:33:34.360 I would have been so I was working a supermarket 0:33:35.520 --> 0:33:37.600 and then it was while I was working there that 0:33:37.640 --> 0:33:42.080 I met my first like proper boyfriend. Not at the supermarket. 0:33:42.120 --> 0:33:44.440 I was just out. I think it was New Year's Eve. 0:33:44.480 --> 0:33:48.719 I was out drinking for New Years and I ran 0:33:48.760 --> 0:33:50.880 into someone on the news, so she's like dragged me 0:33:50.920 --> 0:33:53.000 along to meet her friends. And then the countdown happened, 0:33:53.280 --> 0:33:55.240 and the countdown was happening, and everyone around us was 0:33:55.280 --> 0:33:57.480 like cheering, and some people were kissing, and this guy 0:33:57.520 --> 0:34:00.000 that I had n't met just was like looked at me. 0:34:00.160 --> 0:34:01.920 We just started started to start kissing. And then that 0:34:02.000 --> 0:34:03.360 was my boyfriend for the next couple of years. 0:34:05.240 --> 0:34:07.760 Of the thought went into that, Yeah, that's good. Yeah, 0:34:07.800 --> 0:34:12.200 that's good planning thought. Okay, so you're you're living over 0:34:12.239 --> 0:34:15.600 in WA, you've got casual work, you found the boyfriend, 0:34:16.120 --> 0:34:20.880 giving up your custody over your sister's child, ye, or 0:34:20.920 --> 0:34:22.360 did you take it to the courts? 0:34:22.760 --> 0:34:31.040 Yeah, let it go. I still offered child support but no. 0:34:31.120 --> 0:34:33.120 So I was with my boyfriend for about a year 0:34:33.239 --> 0:34:35.200 and then so my parents still lived in Queensland and 0:34:35.239 --> 0:34:38.799 by then they started working on the mind and then 0:34:39.840 --> 0:34:42.279 they were trying to get me to cut move over 0:34:43.320 --> 0:34:44.960 and they said that they could get me and my 0:34:45.040 --> 0:34:47.120 boyfriend a job on the mind soart that they were 0:34:47.120 --> 0:34:50.080 working on if we moved over. And so that's what 0:34:50.120 --> 0:34:53.480 we did. So I think when I was like eighteen, 0:34:54.480 --> 0:34:57.440 we moved over to Queensland so that we could work 0:34:57.480 --> 0:34:59.880 on this mind site. So we did the whole like 0:35:00.400 --> 0:35:04.439 my mum, my dad and me and my brother ended 0:35:04.520 --> 0:35:07.120 up not immediately, but a few years later he ended 0:35:07.200 --> 0:35:10.080 up also where was that lived in cans and would 0:35:10.080 --> 0:35:11.040 fly and fly out. 0:35:11.840 --> 0:35:13.040 It's a tough gig, isn't it. 0:35:13.320 --> 0:35:15.399 Yeah, yeah, well I go. I ended up doing Flying 0:35:15.440 --> 0:35:18.120 and fly Out for the next well, basically until I 0:35:18.120 --> 0:35:19.920 met my ex husband. So I did it for five. 0:35:19.800 --> 0:35:22.680 Years and money was good at that age. 0:35:22.880 --> 0:35:25.560 Yeah, the money was good, but probably too good for 0:35:25.840 --> 0:35:29.320 an eighteen year old because I was so me and 0:35:29.400 --> 0:35:33.200 the boyfriend broke up the company I worked for in Queensland. 0:35:33.280 --> 0:35:37.239 They were opening a new mine in wa a couple 0:35:37.280 --> 0:35:39.480 of hours out of Perth, and so I saw that 0:35:39.480 --> 0:35:41.680 as an opportunity to go home. So I put my 0:35:41.719 --> 0:35:43.680 hand up to go back over there, and so did 0:35:43.680 --> 0:35:45.279 my parents. So we all ended up coming back to 0:35:45.440 --> 0:35:47.880 w A. I was, you know, when I was with 0:35:47.960 --> 0:35:50.080 my boyfriend, I was quite like settled, and then when 0:35:50.120 --> 0:35:53.320 I came back single and heartbroken for the first time, 0:35:53.600 --> 0:35:55.680 with all this money, I just partied. And that was 0:35:55.680 --> 0:35:58.680 my first sort of real party, proper party phase, I. 0:35:58.600 --> 0:36:02.200 Think, And where did that lead to meth? 0:36:04.400 --> 0:36:06.440 So I made friends, Like one of the first friends 0:36:06.440 --> 0:36:09.520 I made in that town was this girl, uh, and 0:36:09.800 --> 0:36:11.440 I didn't know that she was like that, you know, 0:36:11.480 --> 0:36:13.480 she had a bad reputation in town and she she 0:36:13.560 --> 0:36:15.000 did a lot of that And I didn't even know 0:36:15.000 --> 0:36:16.359 that that's what I was doing when I started doing 0:36:16.400 --> 0:36:18.520 it with her. Like I'd heard of I'd heard of 0:36:18.560 --> 0:36:20.960 meth and I'd seen on TV, like all these horror 0:36:20.960 --> 0:36:22.920 stories about crackheads and stuff, and I was like, oh, 0:36:22.960 --> 0:36:23.680 I'd never do that. 0:36:24.000 --> 0:36:27.280 And then it's almost there's almost like a social stigma, 0:36:27.520 --> 0:36:31.200 like you could be a junkie on yeah at the 0:36:31.239 --> 0:36:32.439 moment you yeah. 0:36:32.440 --> 0:36:34.400 But I think this was when I quite knew or 0:36:34.440 --> 0:36:36.440 if it was around before, we didn't know about it. 0:36:36.520 --> 0:36:38.319 And but I think this was when it was sort 0:36:38.320 --> 0:36:40.840 of like it was sort of emerging, and it was 0:36:40.880 --> 0:36:43.200 more on the news about cracket, especially the American crackets. 0:36:43.239 --> 0:36:45.480 It was when all those pictures would be Facebook of 0:36:45.520 --> 0:36:48.759 the American meth heads, which were quite confronting, and so 0:36:48.800 --> 0:36:49.960 I was like, oh, I would never do that. But 0:36:50.000 --> 0:36:51.480 then I was doing it without even knowing that that's 0:36:51.480 --> 0:36:53.640 what I was doing, because I guess I didn't ask 0:36:53.719 --> 0:36:57.280 what am I taking right now? And it's very addictive. 0:36:57.680 --> 0:36:59.680 So out of all the drugs I've ever tried, that's 0:36:59.719 --> 0:37:02.080 the one that actually was really addictive and was really 0:37:02.120 --> 0:37:03.120 hard to stop doing. 0:37:03.200 --> 0:37:05.560 What these are about it, because I've had other people 0:37:05.960 --> 0:37:08.520 say that that they would try different drugs, but meth. 0:37:08.960 --> 0:37:12.560 You get the hit and it definitely yeah, so it 0:37:12.600 --> 0:37:15.239 definitely gives you like a feeling of euphoria and there's 0:37:15.239 --> 0:37:18.400 something addictive just in so eventually when I started smoking it, 0:37:18.440 --> 0:37:21.080 like the smoking is addictive and even just watching the 0:37:21.120 --> 0:37:25.719 swirl and but the feeling is like like it's very 0:37:25.760 --> 0:37:28.879 It gives you so much confidence. And I'm someone who 0:37:29.320 --> 0:37:32.640 I can be quite socially anxious. I didn't used to 0:37:32.680 --> 0:37:35.359 think I was, but I did realize I only when 0:37:35.360 --> 0:37:36.759 I thought I was a social butterfly was when I 0:37:36.800 --> 0:37:38.799 was drunk and on drugs all the time. As soon 0:37:38.840 --> 0:37:40.799 as I tried to socialize sober, I was like, oh 0:37:40.840 --> 0:37:44.960 this is really hard. So uh yeah, it gave me 0:37:44.960 --> 0:37:46.799 a lot of confidence, I guess while I was on it, 0:37:47.040 --> 0:37:51.040 but it was such a high that the payoff or 0:37:51.120 --> 0:37:53.279 you know what it cost you was that the calm 0:37:53.320 --> 0:37:55.480 down and the low from it afterwards was worse than 0:37:55.520 --> 0:37:58.759 anything else I've ever had. So the calmdown was extraordinary, 0:37:58.840 --> 0:38:00.560 And yeah, it would put you in a really bad 0:38:00.560 --> 0:38:01.680 place mentally. 0:38:03.760 --> 0:38:06.560 When you when you started using meth, When did you 0:38:06.640 --> 0:38:08.040 realize that it got hold of you? 0:38:08.640 --> 0:38:11.680 I think my parents they tried to shape me out 0:38:11.719 --> 0:38:13.359 of it. So but at this because they went through 0:38:13.400 --> 0:38:15.640 periods of so when they left the circus, they weren't 0:38:15.640 --> 0:38:18.520 doing drugs anymore, and they went through a quiet period themselves. 0:38:19.400 --> 0:38:21.760 So at this time they were on the straight and narrow, 0:38:21.840 --> 0:38:25.880 and then I wasn't, and so they weren't silly. They 0:38:25.920 --> 0:38:28.440 could see the signs. They knew what I was probably doing. 0:38:28.520 --> 0:38:30.319 And then because we all worked together, I was like 0:38:30.400 --> 0:38:33.200 taking a lot of sick days and being a bit unreliable, 0:38:33.800 --> 0:38:38.000 And so my parents ended up trying to intervene, and 0:38:38.160 --> 0:38:42.719 they told my boss and they wanted they actually my 0:38:42.760 --> 0:38:44.759 boss said that your dad thinks I should fire you, 0:38:44.800 --> 0:38:48.120 and I was like, that's a bit harsh. And then 0:38:48.120 --> 0:38:50.680 my boss ended up giving me a weird promotion. So 0:38:51.400 --> 0:38:54.440 it didn't make much sense at the time because he 0:38:54.880 --> 0:38:57.120 was He was just like, oh, well, are you unhappy 0:38:57.280 --> 0:38:59.600 with your job? And so this chat that started with 0:38:59.719 --> 0:39:01.879 well with being told that you're on drugs and that's 0:39:01.920 --> 0:39:04.120 why you're being unreliable, But is it because you're unhappy? 0:39:04.160 --> 0:39:07.360 And would you like to do this role instead? So 0:39:07.400 --> 0:39:09.600 I never really understood that, but later it turned out 0:39:09.680 --> 0:39:13.440 so the boss was also a massive sleeve. So I think. 0:39:14.880 --> 0:39:18.160 I would imagine in that that industry, the fly and 0:39:18.200 --> 0:39:21.840 fly out, like I speak to female cops and female 0:39:21.920 --> 0:39:26.919 prison wardens, and in that male dominated industry, it would 0:39:26.920 --> 0:39:30.520 have been a lot of that in Yeah, yeah, you'd 0:39:30.640 --> 0:39:32.960 have to Yeah, you'd have to stand your ground. 0:39:33.280 --> 0:39:37.520 Yeah, yeah, well I was. I did science for a 0:39:37.560 --> 0:39:40.680 few years, and uh, all them a lot of the men, 0:39:40.880 --> 0:39:43.040 would you know, pretend to be single and then you 0:39:43.120 --> 0:39:45.480 find out that they have families and kids at home. 0:39:46.360 --> 0:39:49.200 There was a lot of that. But yeah, it's it's 0:39:49.280 --> 0:39:51.520 not it's not a it's not a great environment. 0:39:51.560 --> 0:39:55.120 I think the and could you from a personal point 0:39:55.120 --> 0:39:58.040 of view, could you manage it like the sleeves, you 0:39:58.080 --> 0:39:59.799 could still take the job. 0:39:59.800 --> 0:40:02.120 But yeah, I think I've always been able to handle 0:40:02.160 --> 0:40:04.279 sleeze bags. I think because you learn to deal with 0:40:04.320 --> 0:40:08.400 them so young. But I also when I was working 0:40:08.400 --> 0:40:11.520 on the mine, I started doing skimpy bar work. So 0:40:11.640 --> 0:40:13.719 because I worked in a bar as well, I got 0:40:13.760 --> 0:40:16.560 a bar job, so that I was I had more money. 0:40:17.160 --> 0:40:19.560 And then because I can't remember what I was, because 0:40:19.680 --> 0:40:22.080 it was before I got on the meth quite badly, 0:40:22.400 --> 0:40:23.799 that I was like, I want to save up and 0:40:23.800 --> 0:40:25.280 I want to buy a house and all these things. 0:40:25.520 --> 0:40:28.160 And so I had a second job. And then I 0:40:28.160 --> 0:40:30.080 don't even know how I even found out about it. 0:40:30.200 --> 0:40:31.880 Might have just been looking in the papers and seeing 0:40:32.000 --> 0:40:34.319 ads for skimpy bar mades. So I started doing skimpy. 0:40:33.960 --> 0:40:35.640 Barmoe, skimpy bar maids. 0:40:35.960 --> 0:40:37.879 So it's huge in Wa, not as big over here. 0:40:37.960 --> 0:40:42.359 So skimpy bar maids is bar stuff that where next 0:40:42.360 --> 0:40:44.760 to nothing. So it was like lingerie outfits and stuff 0:40:44.960 --> 0:40:49.040 behind the bar serving drinks, and it's it's huge in 0:40:49.200 --> 0:40:52.439 w as A. It's a big thing. Skimpys like make 0:40:52.640 --> 0:40:55.320 a lot of money in w A just for serving 0:40:55.360 --> 0:40:56.960 drinks in their bikinis or whatever. 0:40:56.840 --> 0:40:57.640 And get tips. 0:40:57.960 --> 0:41:00.880 Yeah, the tips, tips are good. And so I did that, 0:41:00.960 --> 0:41:04.160 and that I think helped me deal with sleeves, bags 0:41:04.160 --> 0:41:05.520 and just like laugh it off and. 0:41:05.560 --> 0:41:09.200 Okay, so you could push someone away and not take 0:41:09.239 --> 0:41:12.160 offense and just yeah heading stupid, Yeah you got no chance. 0:41:12.280 --> 0:41:17.520 Yeah yeah, Okay. So you're working in the mines, you're 0:41:17.520 --> 0:41:24.480 on meth, you're working this in the terrible Okay. 0:41:24.920 --> 0:41:28.600 So the myth, uh was it was probably I reckon 0:41:29.120 --> 0:41:31.719 maybe like six or seven months that I was doing it, 0:41:31.880 --> 0:41:33.719 Like I would have started off doing it, and it 0:41:33.800 --> 0:41:36.239 was on weekends, and then the weekends started getting longer. Yeah, 0:41:36.440 --> 0:41:38.880 so instead of just you know, Friday Saturday, then it 0:41:38.880 --> 0:41:40.800 would be Sunday, and then it would be Thursday, Friday Saturday, 0:41:40.840 --> 0:41:42.600 and then it would be Wednesday, Thursday, Friday Saturday. And 0:41:42.600 --> 0:41:45.320 these vendors would get longer. And then I think the 0:41:45.440 --> 0:41:47.719 wake up call for me was my mental health just 0:41:47.719 --> 0:41:50.440 got so bad, uh. And I knew that it was 0:41:50.440 --> 0:41:53.759 because like it coincided with every time I partied, and 0:41:53.800 --> 0:41:55.080 so I knew I had to make a choice. So 0:41:55.080 --> 0:41:57.080 it took me a little while because I, you know, 0:41:57.200 --> 0:41:59.120 tried to stop doing it, but were still hanging around 0:41:59.200 --> 0:42:01.719 the same friends. And then I realized that if I 0:42:01.760 --> 0:42:04.760 was going to stop, I needed to change my friendship circle. 0:42:04.920 --> 0:42:07.040 And so I did because I didn't want to keep 0:42:07.040 --> 0:42:08.920 feeling so bad, right right. 0:42:09.040 --> 0:42:14.600 Okay, now from the skimpy bar, you also ended up stripping. 0:42:15.000 --> 0:42:19.719 Yeah, so that happened. So that happened after so I'd 0:42:19.760 --> 0:42:21.799 gotten another I was working somewhere else. By this time, 0:42:21.920 --> 0:42:24.840 I was doing five fay from Perth to Queensland for 0:42:24.880 --> 0:42:28.440 a construction site. I'd got made redundant. So this was 0:42:28.440 --> 0:42:30.640 two thousand and nine global financial crisis. We're in the 0:42:30.640 --> 0:42:33.160 middle of it, and so redundancy was a big thing 0:42:33.320 --> 0:42:35.960 at the time, and I got made redundant, and I 0:42:36.239 --> 0:42:39.040 just before I got made redundant, I'd met some strippers 0:42:39.040 --> 0:42:40.680 and I was hanging out, like on my week's home. 0:42:40.840 --> 0:42:42.959 I was partying with these strippers. So I was parting 0:42:43.000 --> 0:42:45.960 a lot again. Yeah, But because this was every time 0:42:45.960 --> 0:42:48.640 i'd so, I got in another relationship and settled down 0:42:48.640 --> 0:42:50.359 for a little while, and then I was single again. 0:42:50.400 --> 0:42:51.919 So every time I ran amuck was when I was single, 0:42:51.960 --> 0:42:53.840 because as soon as I would get in a relationship, 0:42:53.840 --> 0:42:55.600 i'd settle down, I'd be good for a while, and 0:42:55.640 --> 0:42:59.120 then single me would just be chaos. So I was 0:42:59.120 --> 0:43:02.399 saying I was newly I got made redundant, and I'd 0:43:02.440 --> 0:43:04.520 been hanging out with these new strip of friends that 0:43:04.560 --> 0:43:07.839 I'd met, and then I lost my job. I went 0:43:07.880 --> 0:43:10.920 to first, I went to Vegas, and I ended up 0:43:10.960 --> 0:43:12.960 in America for almost three months because while I was 0:43:13.000 --> 0:43:14.880 in Vegas, I was only meant to go for eight 0:43:14.960 --> 0:43:18.080 days eight day holiday come back. While I was over there, 0:43:18.120 --> 0:43:20.320 I lost my passport while I was drunk in a 0:43:20.400 --> 0:43:23.520 night club and I couldn't get home, and so I 0:43:23.560 --> 0:43:26.200 had to end up going to la for like a 0:43:26.239 --> 0:43:27.719 week to try and sort that out because it was 0:43:27.760 --> 0:43:32.520 a long weekend in Australia and they observed the public holidays, 0:43:32.520 --> 0:43:35.399 so the embassy was shut. So it took me quite 0:43:35.400 --> 0:43:38.080 a while to figure out a new passport to get home. 0:43:38.400 --> 0:43:41.520 And then by that time, I'd met these new people 0:43:41.680 --> 0:43:43.959 and they invited me to stay, and so I did, 0:43:44.000 --> 0:43:45.799 and so I stayed for almost three months before I 0:43:45.800 --> 0:43:49.319 came back. And then when I was I said I 0:43:49.360 --> 0:43:51.160 was obviously coming back to no job. I was chatting 0:43:51.160 --> 0:43:53.239 to my friend and I'd ran out of money and 0:43:53.320 --> 0:43:55.960 she was the stripper, and she booked me into a 0:43:55.960 --> 0:43:59.279 strip job the day I flew home from America. So 0:43:59.320 --> 0:44:01.399 I flew in jet lagged and did it. My first 0:44:01.400 --> 0:44:05.319 strip job that night. Okay, well it wasn't stripped, it 0:44:05.360 --> 0:44:07.160 was topless nude waitressing. 0:44:07.280 --> 0:44:11.960 Okay, And how did that feel? Jet lagged, tied, emotional. 0:44:12.239 --> 0:44:17.200 I probably took a big line of cocaine. I don't 0:44:17.200 --> 0:44:19.719 really remember. I do remember I remember having like I 0:44:20.160 --> 0:44:26.160 had fun. But yeah, I remember. I remember being because 0:44:26.200 --> 0:44:29.000 it was my first time, I was like, well, I 0:44:29.000 --> 0:44:31.600 won't go nude. I'll just do topless. And then within 0:44:31.640 --> 0:44:33.520 a couple of hours I've been offered enough money that 0:44:33.560 --> 0:44:35.960 I was like, okay, I'll go no, and I kind 0:44:35.960 --> 0:44:37.239 of just escalated from there. 0:44:37.400 --> 0:44:39.680 I can imagine how it would escalap from there. We're 0:44:39.680 --> 0:44:42.680 going to we're going to take a break, we'll leave you. 0:44:43.120 --> 0:44:45.239 We'll leave you as a stripper. But there's so much 0:44:45.320 --> 0:44:48.360 more to you. And that's such a fascinating, fascinating story 0:44:48.600 --> 0:44:51.480 and a good way you tell it. It's all life experiences, 0:44:51.640 --> 0:44:55.160 like you know, listen to it. Not everyone lives a normal, 0:44:55.200 --> 0:44:58.400 straight and narrow life. Things things happened. So thanks for 0:44:58.440 --> 0:45:01.319 being so open, the enormous of us. When we get back, 0:45:01.880 --> 0:45:04.879 we'll explore your stripping career a little bit more. We'll 0:45:04.880 --> 0:45:07.040 talk about I want to get more of a sense 0:45:07.080 --> 0:45:10.040 of the life of the partner of a bike. And 0:45:10.400 --> 0:45:13.359 also we'll talk about your new career as a stand 0:45:13.440 --> 0:45:15.640 up comedian and I'm enjoying the chat. 0:45:15.800 --> 0:45:16.719 Thank you, sounds good. 0:45:16.960 --> 0:45:17.240 Cheers.