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Speaker 1: Him My Boris and this is straight talk. Jim Jeffery

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Speaker 1: is welcome to straight talk, maintains, haven't we Jim Jeffries.

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Speaker 1: Jim Jeffries from Australia's biggest comedic expert.

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Speaker 2: I need it for protection. Is that why they called

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Speaker 2: the soult Rifle? Is that I wanted to be a

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Speaker 2: professional comic from the age of eleven and that was

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Speaker 2: all Eddie Murphy's Delirious James Packer's birthday party al Pacina

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Speaker 2: and Warren Batty and Leonardo DiCaprio and Eddie Murphy comes in,

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Speaker 2: don't know you. He goes, what are you doing here?

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Speaker 2: And I said, I'm I'm going to do this stand

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Speaker 2: up for the dinner party. And he goes, there is

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Speaker 2: nowhere that's going to work out, and then he left

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Speaker 2: and I was like, oh no, my favorite comedian said

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Speaker 2: I've just got an unachieved little task, and I went,

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Speaker 2: who are you fuck? I went for me and Pierce

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Speaker 2: have no problem anymore because my wife wouldn't have married

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Speaker 2: me unless I told him to back life. I have

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Speaker 2: never said this joke, right. This is the first time

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Speaker 2: I'm going to say this joke.

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Speaker 1: Right. Jim Jeffery's welcome to Straight Talk Maintenane for having me.

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Speaker 1: How cool is it be back in Australia.

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Speaker 2: I love coming back to Australia. Doing the One Percent

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Speaker 2: Club has allowed me to come back more often than

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Speaker 2: I used to. I used to do like a tour

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Speaker 2: about once every two years, you know, and now I

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Speaker 2: get to come back every year and do the show.

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Speaker 2: Plus I get to do a tour. And you know,

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Speaker 2: my dad's not getting any younger and I try to

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Speaker 2: see him as much as possible, and I always try

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Speaker 2: to sort of have it happening when America is on

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Speaker 2: school holidays and Australia is not. So I got my

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Speaker 2: kids coming down. But it seems like we always come

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Speaker 2: here in the winter, you know, because they're on summer breaks.

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Speaker 1: Pretty fuck to the most, pretty cold.

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Speaker 2: It's not too badly it's going to be colder, but

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Speaker 2: we've been staying out in Bondi and you know, look,

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Speaker 2: we're not going to be getting in the water anytime soon.

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Speaker 2: But but well we'll have a gelato and some you know,

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Speaker 2: fish and chips. That's all me. Some talks about its

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Speaker 2: fish and chips and Australian prawns and eating golden gay times.

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Speaker 2: You know, I've got these American kids who I think, well,

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Speaker 2: the three that doesn't say anything, but the eleven year

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Speaker 2: old thing that thinks that there's a bit of cachet

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Speaker 2: in being Australian. So if I watch him and he's

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Speaker 2: playing like, you know, Fortnite with his mates, you'll go like,

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Speaker 2: go around the back, all right, shoot him? Now cover me?

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Speaker 2: Thanks mate there. It's always weird when the word mate.

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Speaker 2: Whenevery in Australian says mate. Like every other culture in

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Speaker 2: the world, they always try to push they're greeting onto others.

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Speaker 2: So you go to Hawaii and it's a lowha, we

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Speaker 2: all say aloha, he low. How you go to Japan?

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Speaker 2: Can it you are? We all say Australians, we also

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Speaker 2: get a mate? But doesn't it sound terrible When a

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Speaker 2: tourist says it.

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Speaker 1: It sounds really bad, but he's something real the.

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Speaker 2: Twit when an American goes get mate, you're like, that's

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Speaker 2: not your.

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Speaker 1: Word, dude, drop off. So, by the way, I was

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Speaker 1: just thinking about myself, wander When I knew you were

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Speaker 1: coming in, I thought, I reckon, you must be one

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Speaker 1: of Australia's biggest Definitely, let's call it comedic experts, would

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Speaker 1: you be.

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Speaker 2: And it's different now, but for stand up comedy, for

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Speaker 2: the longest time, I was, but I'll never you know,

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Speaker 2: for comic performers, I'll never beat Paul Hogan. Paul Hogan's

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Speaker 2: the biggest ever stand up. For stand up, yes, but

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Speaker 2: it's a different world now, so you're going to get

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Speaker 2: a lot more now. So so right up until about

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Speaker 2: ten years ago, and ten years ago, I was the first.

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Speaker 2: I was one of the first five people to get

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Speaker 2: a Netflix special. They brought five specials out at once. Now. Incidentally,

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Speaker 2: those five specials were me, Bill Burr, Chelsea Hanley, and

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Speaker 2: Chelsea Chelsea Pretti. But the fifth comic it never aired

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Speaker 2: because his name was Bill Cosby. So Netflix came out

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Speaker 2: they said Netflix is a joke and we're going to

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Speaker 2: do specials because before that it was all HBO and Showtime.

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Speaker 2: They did specials and those specials may or may not

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Speaker 2: have aired in the UK or in Australia. But because

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Speaker 2: of Netflix, now there's no conquering America, there's no conquering

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Speaker 2: Britain anymore. It's just conquering the world because everything streamed

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Speaker 2: at once. So I went over and did the UK

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Speaker 2: I started my comedy career out there. Then I went

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Speaker 2: over and did America, and I had to keep going

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Speaker 2: back to cities and getting repeat customers. But now you've

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Speaker 2: got comedians like I saw, like the other day Theo

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Speaker 2: Vaughan came out here and sold that big arena's never

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Speaker 2: been to Australia before, you know what I mean. But

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Speaker 2: because he's on Netflix in the podcast world where people

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Speaker 2: can just stream podcasts, and so all media now is

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Speaker 2: international where it wasn't international ten years ago. So me

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Speaker 2: being arguably the biggest Australian comedian worldwide ten years ago,

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Speaker 2: there'll be people who will overtake me because they're all

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Speaker 2: just going to be Now comedians is going to be

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Speaker 2: universal and they weren't universal before, So I probably aren't

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Speaker 2: going to have that crown for a very short time

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Speaker 2: on it. People probably argue, like Hannah Gatsby one, like

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Speaker 2: she won Emmys and stuff like that, that I think

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Speaker 2: she got paid a lot more money for her standup

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Speaker 2: specials than me, but I don't know if the ticket

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Speaker 2: sales were the same. But it's not a competition, is it?

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Speaker 1: Bullshit?

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Speaker 2: Totally?

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Speaker 1: I go more speaking about like I've got to ash

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Speaker 1: straight up Jeffrey Nugent. How did you get Jim Jefferies

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Speaker 1: out of Jeffrey.

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Speaker 2: Now case, and my full name is Jeffrey James Nugent,

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Speaker 2: and so Jeffrey with a G. I always kind of

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Speaker 2: disliked the name Jeffrey because my mother was very strict

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Speaker 2: individual right up until the day she died. She's very

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Speaker 2: strict individual. She wouldn't let my friends call me jeff

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Speaker 2: or anything. That was always Jeffrey with a G. It

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Speaker 2: sounds Jeffrey Nugent sounded very prim and proper type of name.

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Speaker 2: So I went on to do Nugent's on a very

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Speaker 2: popular name in Australia. There's more well known in America

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Speaker 2: or in Ireland or something like that. But I went

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Speaker 2: on stage and I think it was Adam Hills, but

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Speaker 2: I'm not completely sure, as Jeffrey Ugen as Jeffreys. My

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Speaker 2: first gig seventeen years old, so maybe eighteen years old,

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Speaker 2: and they said please welcome to the stage, Godfrey Nuggan.

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Speaker 2: There's no d in there or anything, but I went

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Speaker 2: Godfrey Nuggant. Godfrey Nuggan isn't a very rock and roll name,

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Speaker 2: is it, And so I thought I'll change it for

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Speaker 2: one show changed it to Jeffrey James, which was just

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Speaker 2: took my last name off, and that didn't sound right.

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Speaker 2: And then I thought maybe maybe Jim Jeffries and then

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Speaker 2: the alliteration, so I changed and it was just like

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Speaker 2: a decision that took me minutes. And I was just like, oh,

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Speaker 2: Jim Jeffries, how about that. I'll give that a go.

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Speaker 2: And I remember, incidentally, I actually ran it past my

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Speaker 2: parents what they thought, you know, because I didn't want

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Speaker 2: to disappoint them, you know, like changing their name the

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Speaker 2: name I was given. My kids have, so I never

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Speaker 2: legally changed my name. I'm still legally Jeffrey. My kids

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Speaker 2: have the legal name of Jeffries, right.

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Speaker 1: And as when they were born, you're registered.

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Speaker 2: I gave him my stage name and I just did

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Speaker 2: that because I just didn't want it to be really difficult.

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Speaker 2: Why do you have a different name from me? And

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Speaker 2: my wife kept her name, so all three of us

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Speaker 2: have different names in our passports and we try to

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Speaker 2: get through the airport and it's very difficult.

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Speaker 1: So I said, your pastor was, say Jim Jeffries.

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Speaker 2: Jeffrey ug well, and I've always thought I'll legally change it,

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Speaker 2: but you know, what. Sometimes it's nice to have two names.

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Speaker 2: Like if if I'm ringing up and I want to

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Speaker 2: quote on some something to get fixed in my house, Well,

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Speaker 2: jeff Jim Jeffries has got money, an't he? Yeah, Jeffrey

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Speaker 2: Newgen doesn't have any money. You're not gonna You're not

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Speaker 2: gonna bump his quote up? Right? Oh?

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Speaker 1: God for Newna go none?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, God for godfree nuggets. You've got nothing, right, So

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Speaker 2: I use one name when I need it, another name

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Speaker 2: when I need it.

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Speaker 1: That sounds that's pretty cool. Actually, I can call you

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Speaker 1: Jimmy two names or Jeffrey two names.

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Speaker 2: I don't. I don't respond to Jeffrey. I don't turn

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Speaker 2: around anymore. It took years for that, and I got

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Speaker 2: one of my brothers calls me Jim, and one of

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Speaker 2: them calls me Jeffrey. And my dad still calls me Jeffrey,

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Speaker 2: and he's not going to change anytime soon.

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Speaker 1: So can we just go back to betwek many parents?

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Speaker 1: I'm born in Sydney, Yeah, what's the deal my parents?

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Speaker 2: My father in nineteen sixty nine brought a block of

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Speaker 2: land in sirn Ives, Sydney and knives to Knives Sydney

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Speaker 2: and he built the house himself.

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Speaker 1: He's a builder.

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Speaker 2: My father's a carpet and he built it over time himself.

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Speaker 2: And the whole block of land on a dirt road

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Speaker 2: cost him. I believe sixteen thousand dollars was the whole

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Speaker 2: investment block of land and the property for a house

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Speaker 2: in Sainaives. I always, I always find it weird whenever

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Speaker 2: you say anyone from Sydney, Sydney will know the name

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Speaker 2: Sa Knives, and everyone always thinks it's really fancy. They go, ooh,

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Speaker 2: you Dives like that. We were pretty, we were very

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Speaker 2: working class family. But that's my dad's best investment he

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Speaker 2: ever did I think Knives in nineteen sixty nine.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that'd be worth a fever to donat. Is he

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Speaker 1: still there?

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Speaker 2: He still lives in the same house and he built

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Speaker 2: the same house that he built little top, very small house,

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Speaker 2: bloody tiny. Yeah, he still is in the same house

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Speaker 2: that he's eighty two or eighty three, and he still

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Speaker 2: lives in the same shape. He's got he's got a

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Speaker 2: few health conditions as all eighty three year old, but

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Speaker 2: he's a sound Let's put it this way. He could

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Speaker 2: run the free world. He's young enough to run to

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Speaker 2: be president. You know what I mean? I think you

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Speaker 2: get out debate Biden. Yeah, that's pretty good.

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Speaker 1: It's sort of lowbathera.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, he wouldn't have that.

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Speaker 1: Trump, he wouldn't take it.

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Speaker 2: He wouldn't take a bullet as good as Trump, I'll

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Speaker 2: tell you that much.

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Speaker 1: Well, we're going to talk about Trump.

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Speaker 2: More gingerly get through his feet, I reckon, But no,

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Speaker 2: he's in good health.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and you've got a brother, do just say, two

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Speaker 1: older brothers. And we have school up there, so into

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Speaker 1: the state school system.

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Speaker 2: State school system. No terrible student, very dyslexic. To this day,

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Speaker 2: I'm reading is my kryptonite. I find it very hard

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Speaker 2: to read.

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Speaker 1: Please explain what you mean by just like as in words.

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Speaker 2: Don't around. I find reading out loud very panicky to

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Speaker 2: this day. And even when I'm doing the One Percent Club,

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Speaker 2: I have to read a teller prompt and if anyone

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Speaker 2: who's been a contestant on the show that the even

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Speaker 2: now I started a little bit, the lead ins and

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Speaker 2: the outros and stuff like that, that's hard work for me.

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Speaker 2: But when we did the Jim Jeffrey Show in America,

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Speaker 2: I used to have to just sit there and do

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Speaker 2: a thirty minute show from top to bottom, and in

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Speaker 2: the end I got rid of the teleprompt and just

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Speaker 2: really put points in there, and I memorized the jokes

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Speaker 2: as much as I could, you know. So I'm all

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Speaker 2: right when I'm just talking, but I find reading out

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Speaker 2: loud very hard. I had a few dyslexia. I don't

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Speaker 2: believe it, but I got diagnosed with with attention deficit disorder,

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Speaker 2: which later at a doctor in my adult life said

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Speaker 2: that I was probably autistic. But I still to this day,

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Speaker 2: I got a few social key problems. I find it

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Speaker 2: very hard to make eye contact. I keep on reminding

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Speaker 2: myself through this interview just to look up and all

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Speaker 2: that type of stuff. And if I'm at parties. But

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Speaker 2: the thing I do with my wife is my wife

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Speaker 2: stands next to me at parties and every now and

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Speaker 2: again reminds me to ask people questions about their life,

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Speaker 2: just making sure I are something about them, and I go,

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Speaker 2: how long are you two being married?

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Speaker 1: Really?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, you know what I mean. It's not that

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Speaker 2: I'm a bad dude or nothing. I just, you know,

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Speaker 2: I just I've spent my whole career just basically talking

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Speaker 2: to myself that's all stand up comedy is working by

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Speaker 2: myself talking to myself. And so even if I do

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Speaker 2: an interview like this, you don't even have to ask

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Speaker 2: a question. I'll just keep talking until there's I don't

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Speaker 2: like silences, and so.

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Speaker 1: That's very interesting what you said about I mean, I

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Speaker 1: want to come at you growing up in a minute,

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Speaker 1: but I just want to quickly advance to that point

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Speaker 1: when I've often know too, when you address an audience,

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Speaker 1: a big audience, it doesn't matter with the audience, I

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Speaker 1: don't reckon you're actually talking to the audience. You're talking

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Speaker 1: to yourself the whole time. That's what I think anyway.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you're giving opinions and you're telling stories and all

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Speaker 2: that type of stuff, but you know you need the

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Speaker 2: response from them. It is a relationship. It isn't just

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Speaker 2: yourself there. I see them as not a thousands of

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Speaker 2: people or one hundred people. I see them as one

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Speaker 2: unit that I'm talking to, one group. And so so

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Speaker 2: like when people say, oh, there's a bad crowd or

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Speaker 2: whatever like that, it's they're not all bad. You know.

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Speaker 2: I've done shows in front of eight thousand people and

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Speaker 2: they weren't a great crowd. And I've done shows in

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Speaker 2: front of eight people who were banging. It's just the

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Speaker 2: ratio of good to bad, you know.

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Speaker 1: I guess it also depends where you are, if you're

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Speaker 1: in Texas or something like that.

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Speaker 2: Well I've had, I've had. Yeah, I played all over

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Speaker 2: I played all over the world, you know. And you know,

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Speaker 2: like next year I'll be touring Europe and the UK,

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Speaker 2: and this year I'm touring Australia is my overseas tour,

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Speaker 2: and me and Jimmy Carr are doing a double act

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Speaker 2: thing in Canada. Across Canada, we're doing not want to

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Speaker 2: say double like the tourists were doing a double headline thing.

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Speaker 2: We're doing that in different ice hockey arenas in front

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Speaker 2: of Canadians, you know. So looking forward to war with

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Speaker 2: another comic, you know. And then but also like last

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Speaker 2: year I did Asia and then I'm going to do

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Speaker 2: Europe again. But this next year I'm going to do

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Speaker 2: places in Europe I haven't been, you know, I'm going

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Speaker 2: to go to like I know, this is an all

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Speaker 2: Turk Europe a Turkey and Morocco and different little places

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Speaker 2: that I haven't been on tour before, you know, And

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Speaker 2: I try to take the family and sort of see

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Speaker 2: the world that way, a bit partridge family.

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Speaker 1: But that's part of family. Even know what you're talking.

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Speaker 1: But I remember party family. Well. So if I go

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Speaker 1: back to them, when you see you want a great student,

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Speaker 1: you had a terrible, terrible student, you know, maybe they said, yeah,

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Speaker 1: bit of Adiah.

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Speaker 2: In other words, I don't think I did. I think

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Speaker 2: that was just something that was over diagnosed. And I

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Speaker 2: also think that there are a lot of things with

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Speaker 2: attention deficit disorder because I wasn't disruptive very much. But

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Speaker 2: I think that sometimes they over diagnose personalities. That's just

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Speaker 2: my opinion. There's people with attention deficit disorder that will

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Speaker 2: completely disagree with that and think it's a real thing.

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Speaker 2: But I think that I personally think that I was

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Speaker 2: over medicated.

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Speaker 1: You were medicated for it, too.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. I was taking so much riddling my hands still shaped, wow,

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Speaker 2: you know, and I call age oh nine, Oh my god.

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Speaker 2: And by the time I was fifteen, I was taken

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Speaker 2: about six to eight riddlans a day. My mother would

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Speaker 2: wake me up with a riddling and a glass orange juice.

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Speaker 2: So the first first thing my eyes opened, a pill

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Speaker 2: would be put in my mouth.

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Speaker 1: Quick shot of them fetamines.

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Speaker 2: Yeah and so. And I've been very open about my

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Speaker 2: drug usage throughout my life and to this day, fetamines

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Speaker 2: don't do much to me, yes that point the point,

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Speaker 2: they don't do much to me. They just sit on me,

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Speaker 2: you know. But I got off them about sixteen. I

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Speaker 2: didn't take them for the rest because I thought my

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Speaker 2: hands started twitching all the time, and I thought this

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Speaker 2: can't be good for you doing all this thing.

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Speaker 1: That's a big decision for sixteen year older man.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but then, you know, I still took other drugs

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Speaker 2: as an older person. You know, I got into that

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Speaker 2: game sort of a bit late, living in England and

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Speaker 2: all the other stuff. I never say that I was

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Speaker 2: a drug addict or something like that, but I I

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Speaker 2: you know, I went pretty hard.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, a bit more recreational. It wasn't like day to

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Speaker 1: day data.

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Speaker 2: Not day to day, but yeah, I was. I was

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Speaker 2: doing them pretty It depends if there was a comedy

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Speaker 2: festival on or I was just sitting at home. If

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Speaker 2: I was sitting at home, I was never doing it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, well, I mean I think most people won

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Speaker 1: a minute, but I reckon just better. In Australia, specially

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Speaker 1: these days. I mean, like we're sitting here right now

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Speaker 1: in the middle of the suburbs. Mate, there's just been

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Speaker 1: every dude and girl in these suburbs taste cocaine every

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Speaker 1: fucking Friday night and Saturday night mentally.

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Speaker 2: But see when I was doing it in England for

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Speaker 2: fifty pounds a gram, yeah, versus what is it three

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Speaker 2: hundred and something dollars here? And then you know, I'm

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Speaker 2: going to have to be open with my sons about

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Speaker 2: it because I've been open about saying talking about it

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Speaker 2: so much that they'll be able to see footage of

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Speaker 2: me talking about it. And now with the fucking fentanyl

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Speaker 2: in America, people are dying.

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Speaker 1: It's just it's just not as a substitute because they're

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Speaker 1: puting fendalin and people think it's cocain.

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Speaker 2: Would yeah, yeah, the fananel people, I know, people have

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Speaker 2: dropped dead like it's it's rampant in America. People fucking

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Speaker 2: dropping dead from fent and al.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 2: And these are people who aren't drug I'd actually just

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Speaker 2: taking a little bit of line here, line there, and

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Speaker 2: they're bloody dropping dead. And I know it hasn't really

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Speaker 2: hit Australia, but you don't want that fucking shit coming

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Speaker 2: over here. I hear that the bike. He's put an

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Speaker 2: article saying anyone who cuts our products, you know what

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Speaker 2: I mean, like bloody terrible stuff. So I haven't taken

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Speaker 2: drugs in a very long time, very long time. So

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Speaker 2: I'm not talking about someone who did it last week.

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Speaker 2: But there's been some incidences in the comedy community. So

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Speaker 2: people I know who are just like that one line, bang,

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Speaker 2: you need, you need, you need amount. That's like a

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Speaker 2: grain of sand. Up. You know he's in your bloody

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Speaker 2: You're gone, bloody terrible.

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Speaker 1: Someone says like a hundred times more more lethal than heroin. Heroin, Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's a ship drug.

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Speaker 2: And so yeah, they fucked with it too much, you

359
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Speaker 2: know what I mean, they fucked with it too much.

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Speaker 2: Back in the day, pills in the ecstasy had a

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Speaker 2: wonderful time and then the fucking assholes bloody fucked with it.

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Speaker 1: If you didn't, if you weren't a great student, then

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Speaker 1: how did you end up? I was just turned out

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Speaker 1: to study, Like what did you end up doing? Like

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Speaker 1: after school?

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Speaker 2: Hardly past school? I got what you would call in

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Speaker 2: your HC. You had that rank score and one hundred

368
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Speaker 2: being the best and I got thirty four, not great,

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Speaker 2: not great, but better than I third thought I would.

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Speaker 2: And then I went and studied at WAPPA, the Western

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Speaker 2: Australian Academy of Performing Arts, which was more famous than

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Speaker 2: anything for having Lisa McEwen and Hugh Jackman went there.

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Speaker 2: And I went and studied musical theater there for one year,

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Speaker 2: and then I didn't get through to the next bit

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Speaker 2: of the course, and then I went in opera singing

376
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Speaker 2: for the last little bit because I was just but

377
00:17:38,520 --> 00:17:41,359
Speaker 2: I was really just buying time until I could be

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Speaker 2: a professional comedian. And that's what I wanted to be

379
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Speaker 2: as a little, tiny kid, really professional I wanted to be.

380
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Speaker 2: I wanted to be a professional comic from the age

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Speaker 2: of eleven, and I was obsessed with comedy from before

382
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Speaker 2: that and that was all Eddie Murphy's delirious. So you

383
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Speaker 2: got to So this is my point is we're going

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Speaker 2: to have some amazing comics come out of Australia. Now,

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Speaker 2: We're going to have word We've always had world class comics,

386
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Speaker 2: but we're going to have people who are going to

387
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Speaker 2: be so big coming out of this country because they're

388
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Speaker 2: getting exposure which I never got. Right, So my first

389
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Speaker 2: experience with George Carlin was he was rufus off Bill

390
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Speaker 2: and Ted's Excellent Adventure. I never saw a George Carlin special.

391
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Speaker 2: I never saw an HBO special someone doing comedy for

392
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Speaker 2: an hour. All we had was people doing comedy for

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Speaker 2: about five minutes on a late night show and Steve Wizard.

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Speaker 2: Once a month, maybe you'd get a comedian. And they

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Speaker 2: had a TV show on the ABC called The Big Gig,

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Speaker 2: and the Big Gig Wendy Harmer and different comics were

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Speaker 2: on there and they were doing great job, but they

398
00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:44,520
Speaker 2: were all doing five minutes, five minutes, five minutes. They

399
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Speaker 2: putty bit of music in between, and I used to

400
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Speaker 2: lap that up. And the big show for me in

401
00:18:48,440 --> 00:18:52,600
Speaker 2: high school was The Late Show with McK mclloyan all

402
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Speaker 2: that and Rob Sitch. I used to love that show.

403
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Speaker 2: And look, I'm working with McK mlloy tonight. And I

404
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Speaker 2: would never say this to him. I hope you hasn't

405
00:19:00,240 --> 00:19:02,280
Speaker 2: listened to me saying it, but he's listening. But it's

406
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Speaker 2: so wonderful to call a hero of mine a friend,

407
00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:09,200
Speaker 2: you know what I mean? That's cool because he doesn't

408
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Speaker 2: know that. But so the difference between my parents didn't

409
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Speaker 2: buy comedy albums. There was no way. There was no

410
00:19:18,600 --> 00:19:21,200
Speaker 2: cable TV, there was no way to watch an hour

411
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Speaker 2: long comedy special in Australia except for one special, and

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Speaker 2: that was Eddie Murphy's Delirious and Eddie Murphy's Raw. Eventually,

413
00:19:29,280 --> 00:19:33,159
Speaker 2: but that stage Delirious and Delirious was available at the

414
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Speaker 2: video store because it was the first special ever that

415
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Speaker 2: was a cinematic release, so it was counted as a movie,

416
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Speaker 2: so it was released in the movies. And it just

417
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Speaker 2: so happened that when I'm fucking eleven years old, I

418
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Speaker 2: have an eighteen year old brother who can rent that video. Right,

419
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Speaker 2: So my eighteen year old brother, who has since become

420
00:19:53,480 --> 00:19:57,280
Speaker 2: a cop, was showing R rated movies to children, so

421
00:19:57,320 --> 00:20:00,440
Speaker 2: we should pull him up on that. But him, yeah, yeah,

422
00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:03,679
Speaker 2: we should get that blake, you know. But so we

423
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Speaker 2: had Delirious and my brother's rented it a few times,

424
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Speaker 2: and I used to wait, like if my father went,

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Speaker 2: I got he's doing a bit of gardening for ten minutes,

426
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Speaker 2: I'd put it in the video player and watch ten

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Speaker 2: minutes and then get sneak another five minutes because I

428
00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:18,600
Speaker 2: was just thinking up and I just thought it was

429
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Speaker 2: so amazing like a bloke, and it still to this

430
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Speaker 2: day is sort of why I wear like leather shirts.

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Speaker 2: On stage was Eddie Murtphy. He was in like a

432
00:20:25,680 --> 00:20:28,520
Speaker 2: leather outfit, looking like Elvis, just the redd the thing

433
00:20:28,560 --> 00:20:31,000
Speaker 2: with the shirt open, and at that stage he was

434
00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:33,840
Speaker 2: maybe twenty one years old or something. And then he's

435
00:20:33,880 --> 00:20:36,080
Speaker 2: off to do Beverly Hills cop and I thought that

436
00:20:36,200 --> 00:20:40,200
Speaker 2: guy was just everything to me, just telling these long

437
00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:43,320
Speaker 2: winded stories, and to this day I think I probably

438
00:20:43,400 --> 00:20:45,959
Speaker 2: modeled myself more on him than anything. And then by

439
00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:51,680
Speaker 2: the time I was sixteen, Anthony Morgan, the Australian comedian.

440
00:20:51,720 --> 00:20:53,760
Speaker 2: He always used to do the side pieces on viz

441
00:20:53,840 --> 00:20:56,080
Speaker 2: Art and he used to watch Visa. He did a show.

442
00:20:56,160 --> 00:20:58,440
Speaker 2: There was a theater called the Harbor Theater or something

443
00:20:58,440 --> 00:21:00,560
Speaker 2: which is underneath the Harbor Bridge, I think just I

444
00:21:00,560 --> 00:21:02,320
Speaker 2: think on the east side and on the north side.

445
00:21:02,320 --> 00:21:08,239
Speaker 2: But he I fake idat it and went in and

446
00:21:08,359 --> 00:21:11,120
Speaker 2: went and saw Anthony Morgan and that was the first

447
00:21:11,160 --> 00:21:14,240
Speaker 2: time I'd seen stand up comedy live and the guy

448
00:21:14,320 --> 00:21:15,560
Speaker 2: was on stage for an hour and a half and

449
00:21:15,600 --> 00:21:18,400
Speaker 2: I thought that was just wonderful. And I've still never

450
00:21:18,440 --> 00:21:22,320
Speaker 2: met Anthony and he doesn't do much comedy, but I'd

451
00:21:22,400 --> 00:21:24,200
Speaker 2: love to give that guy a hug because that was

452
00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:26,720
Speaker 2: a real pivotal moment in my life, was actually seeing

453
00:21:26,760 --> 00:21:29,280
Speaker 2: someone and there was only a couple hundred people there,

454
00:21:29,560 --> 00:21:33,000
Speaker 2: you know, but I thought that was fantastic because the

455
00:21:33,119 --> 00:21:38,080
Speaker 2: idea of you know, I'm going to say something very

456
00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:42,520
Speaker 2: arrogant here, I'm a better fucking entertainer than Beyonce. Fuck yeah,

457
00:21:42,560 --> 00:21:45,719
Speaker 2: I am too, right, I am. On my basis, I explained,

458
00:21:47,160 --> 00:21:50,480
Speaker 2: let's see her do it without fucking dances and choreographed

459
00:21:50,560 --> 00:21:54,360
Speaker 2: routines and fucking lights and a backup band. Let's see

460
00:21:54,400 --> 00:21:56,760
Speaker 2: her get out there and entertain people with nothing but

461
00:21:56,800 --> 00:22:01,280
Speaker 2: a microphone, right, And that's really point. With nothing but

462
00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:05,159
Speaker 2: a microphone, right, I can entertain. I saw that the

463
00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:09,720
Speaker 2: road leave. I can entertain ten thousand people just with

464
00:22:09,800 --> 00:22:12,800
Speaker 2: a microphone and the spotlight. Right. And I know I

465
00:22:12,840 --> 00:22:14,520
Speaker 2: know lots of other people who can do this. I'm

466
00:22:14,520 --> 00:22:17,159
Speaker 2: not alone on this, there's loads of comedians. But I

467
00:22:17,200 --> 00:22:20,520
Speaker 2: remember having so much respect for Anthony Morgan when I

468
00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:23,720
Speaker 2: left that room, thinking that was something special.

469
00:22:23,760 --> 00:22:24,919
Speaker 1: But what was it? What was it?

470
00:22:24,960 --> 00:22:28,800
Speaker 2: What was the what I'd seen people talk in front

471
00:22:28,800 --> 00:22:31,359
Speaker 2: of rooms full of people, and they were fucking boring,

472
00:22:31,440 --> 00:22:34,480
Speaker 2: and they were called school teachers, you know what I mean.

473
00:22:34,560 --> 00:22:37,200
Speaker 2: I'd seen people stand up and chat with this, and

474
00:22:37,240 --> 00:22:39,800
Speaker 2: it was always just such a like if you see

475
00:22:39,840 --> 00:22:42,679
Speaker 2: now you go to any conference or anything and someone

476
00:22:42,760 --> 00:22:45,120
Speaker 2: walks up and they get to the podium, there's an

477
00:22:45,119 --> 00:22:49,760
Speaker 2: element of how long is this gonna be? Right? And

478
00:22:49,880 --> 00:22:53,520
Speaker 2: anyone can do it for five minutes, just five minutes.

479
00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:55,399
Speaker 2: Anyone can do it for like stand up, can do

480
00:22:55,480 --> 00:22:57,960
Speaker 2: real punchy your best man speech at a wedding or

481
00:22:58,000 --> 00:23:02,200
Speaker 2: something like that. But now people going to get bored out.

482
00:23:02,200 --> 00:23:06,040
Speaker 2: If you can hold people's attention hour plus, that's something else,

483
00:23:06,200 --> 00:23:10,359
Speaker 2: you know. So I thought more than seeing you know,

484
00:23:10,440 --> 00:23:13,560
Speaker 2: I've seen Paul McCartney in concert, I've seen you know,

485
00:23:13,920 --> 00:23:17,840
Speaker 2: great art of Elton John like music, it's like great musicians,

486
00:23:17,840 --> 00:23:20,600
Speaker 2: and it's amazing when you watch them, like how do

487
00:23:20,680 --> 00:23:23,199
Speaker 2: they pay all these instruments and all that type of stuff,

488
00:23:23,359 --> 00:23:25,720
Speaker 2: But at the end of the day, they've still got

489
00:23:25,760 --> 00:23:28,160
Speaker 2: that trick in front of them and they've still got

490
00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:30,960
Speaker 2: So the big difference between music and comedy is I

491
00:23:30,960 --> 00:23:33,760
Speaker 2: don't know why musicians even bother naming their fucking tours

492
00:23:33,760 --> 00:23:35,920
Speaker 2: because there's beans bands that I like, Like I've seen

493
00:23:35,960 --> 00:23:40,160
Speaker 2: Oasis live fifteen times. The tour is always the same.

494
00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:42,320
Speaker 2: They can name it something else, but it's always the

495
00:23:42,359 --> 00:23:45,600
Speaker 2: fucking same, right, Because the big difference between comedy and

496
00:23:45,760 --> 00:23:50,600
Speaker 2: music is when you're watching comedy, you only want to

497
00:23:50,640 --> 00:23:53,920
Speaker 2: hear the new stuff. When you're watching music, you only

498
00:23:53,960 --> 00:23:56,320
Speaker 2: want to hear the old stuff. When they play a

499
00:23:56,359 --> 00:23:59,760
Speaker 2: new song, they're like a fuck plays up off the

500
00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:02,639
Speaker 2: old albums. Yeah, right, And if I played one of

501
00:24:02,720 --> 00:24:05,119
Speaker 2: my old jokes, I haven't put enough effort in. So

502
00:24:05,240 --> 00:24:07,840
Speaker 2: musicians they can sort of sit back on a few

503
00:24:07,920 --> 00:24:10,000
Speaker 2: hits and keep on bringing him out all the time.

504
00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:13,320
Speaker 2: If you do stand up comedy at a certain level,

505
00:24:13,720 --> 00:24:16,320
Speaker 2: once you record a joke, you have to not everybody,

506
00:24:16,440 --> 00:24:19,080
Speaker 2: like Seinfeld has a different theory on this. He reckons

507
00:24:19,160 --> 00:24:22,320
Speaker 2: you keep the jokes going all the time, but if

508
00:24:22,359 --> 00:24:24,480
Speaker 2: you record a joke, you should retire a joke after

509
00:24:24,520 --> 00:24:29,520
Speaker 2: it's recorded. Right. So I got nine specials and a CD.

510
00:24:29,600 --> 00:24:32,639
Speaker 2: So I got recorded plus TV spots. I don't know,

511
00:24:33,480 --> 00:24:35,520
Speaker 2: twelve hours of stand up or something like that. But

512
00:24:35,560 --> 00:24:38,400
Speaker 2: it's all different stuff, you know, some of it's better

513
00:24:38,400 --> 00:24:40,440
Speaker 2: than others, and some of it's a bit more fillery

514
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:42,960
Speaker 2: than others, and then there's some more iconic pieces and

515
00:24:42,960 --> 00:24:46,280
Speaker 2: stuff like that. But no one wants to hear me

516
00:24:46,440 --> 00:24:49,080
Speaker 2: come out and just crack on about gun control again

517
00:24:49,480 --> 00:24:53,680
Speaker 2: because I've done it, you know. So there's a bigger

518
00:24:53,720 --> 00:24:57,160
Speaker 2: workload I think involved in live touring for a comedian.

519
00:24:57,600 --> 00:24:58,840
Speaker 1: That's something I want to talk to you about, because

520
00:24:58,880 --> 00:25:00,960
Speaker 1: I mean, it's funny you should say, because I mean,

521
00:25:01,320 --> 00:25:05,520
Speaker 1: I'm always of a comedy and I go into YouTube

522
00:25:05,600 --> 00:25:07,840
Speaker 1: usually because I'm seeing looking on Netflix. There's a lot

523
00:25:07,840 --> 00:25:09,800
Speaker 1: of old stuff on there, and I've seen it all,

524
00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:13,800
Speaker 1: and I've watched you and you mentioned Bill Burr and

525
00:25:13,840 --> 00:25:17,159
Speaker 1: then and he's like, he's larious, lovely man. I like

526
00:25:17,240 --> 00:25:19,159
Speaker 1: the way he gets sort of yells at me and

527
00:25:19,560 --> 00:25:21,000
Speaker 1: gets me thinking about myself.

528
00:25:21,160 --> 00:25:24,080
Speaker 2: He is going to slip very easily into being an

529
00:25:24,080 --> 00:25:27,440
Speaker 2: old man. He's already comaginate. But he's a sweet guy.

530
00:25:28,200 --> 00:25:30,640
Speaker 1: And he's but I like his content. But it's funny.

531
00:25:30,680 --> 00:25:32,560
Speaker 1: You should say what you said, because I keep gither

532
00:25:32,760 --> 00:25:35,520
Speaker 1: no I I've seen that one or not, and because

533
00:25:35,520 --> 00:25:37,359
Speaker 1: I don't want to see it again, same as you.

534
00:25:37,400 --> 00:25:38,520
Speaker 1: When I look at your stuff. I don't want to

535
00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:38,880
Speaker 1: see it again.

536
00:25:38,920 --> 00:25:39,280
Speaker 2: You're right.

537
00:25:39,520 --> 00:25:41,879
Speaker 1: That's quite interesting between that and the difference between the

538
00:25:41,920 --> 00:25:44,639
Speaker 1: singing because or a musician. Because you're right. When it

539
00:25:44,640 --> 00:25:46,320
Speaker 1: comes to music and what the funk? Why where are

540
00:25:46,359 --> 00:25:47,159
Speaker 1: all the old songs?

541
00:25:47,359 --> 00:25:49,960
Speaker 2: Because you want to tap your foot along with the music?

542
00:25:50,119 --> 00:25:52,240
Speaker 1: Is it more memorable memory or nostalgia?

543
00:25:52,320 --> 00:25:54,199
Speaker 2: Do you want to tap your foot foot along with

544
00:25:54,240 --> 00:25:57,399
Speaker 2: the music and know when the chorus is coming? And

545
00:25:57,400 --> 00:25:59,480
Speaker 2: with comedy, you want to be surprised.

546
00:25:59,320 --> 00:26:03,840
Speaker 1: Right, Okay, So so music is about being familiar. Comedy

547
00:26:03,880 --> 00:26:04,639
Speaker 1: is about being surprised.

548
00:26:04,720 --> 00:26:06,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, comedy. Music is about memories.

549
00:26:07,080 --> 00:26:07,679
Speaker 1: Surprise me.

550
00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:09,520
Speaker 2: Yeah. You want to hear a joke?

551
00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:12,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, give me, I don't have one.

552
00:26:12,200 --> 00:26:14,680
Speaker 2: I'll tell you pub jake. Let me think of Okay,

553
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:16,920
Speaker 2: this joke is a name drop for you. Was told

554
00:26:16,920 --> 00:26:20,040
Speaker 2: to me by Jay Leno whenever anyone asked for a

555
00:26:20,040 --> 00:26:21,800
Speaker 2: pub joke. This is the pub jake. I give right,

556
00:26:22,400 --> 00:26:25,400
Speaker 2: So who knows who wrote this? But what's the pub jake?

557
00:26:25,440 --> 00:26:27,480
Speaker 2: He goes, So there's a guy finds a Genie's bottle

558
00:26:28,080 --> 00:26:31,479
Speaker 2: and he rubs it. Genie comes out and he goes,

559
00:26:32,280 --> 00:26:34,480
Speaker 2: you have two wishes? And the guy went I thought

560
00:26:34,480 --> 00:26:36,800
Speaker 2: I get three wishes. He goes check your pants and

561
00:26:36,800 --> 00:26:38,359
Speaker 2: he looks down he's got a great, big dick, and

562
00:26:38,359 --> 00:26:40,920
Speaker 2: the jenny goes, I've been doing this a long time.

563
00:26:43,760 --> 00:26:46,040
Speaker 2: That's a good pub joke, right, And the good thing

564
00:26:46,040 --> 00:26:48,879
Speaker 2: about that joke is now you can tell it your friends,

565
00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:50,359
Speaker 2: and you can tell it your friends and then they

566
00:26:50,400 --> 00:26:53,280
Speaker 2: will spread like a fucking STD and everyone will enjoy it,

567
00:26:53,400 --> 00:26:54,000
Speaker 2: just like an.

568
00:26:53,880 --> 00:26:57,600
Speaker 1: STD's just like good dick joke. If what was it

569
00:26:57,680 --> 00:27:01,160
Speaker 1: then about Eddie Murphy that actually got you enthralled about

570
00:27:01,240 --> 00:27:04,040
Speaker 1: being a comedian? Like, was it his content? Was it

571
00:27:04,119 --> 00:27:06,239
Speaker 1: about how the accolades he got? Was the fact that

572
00:27:06,240 --> 00:27:07,280
Speaker 1: he just made you laugh?

573
00:27:07,359 --> 00:27:11,480
Speaker 2: He made me laugh? But also just cool man, he's

574
00:27:11,600 --> 00:27:14,680
Speaker 2: a cool dude, because like, okay, so.

575
00:27:14,920 --> 00:27:16,639
Speaker 1: I don't know that means cool man? What do you

576
00:27:16,680 --> 00:27:17,920
Speaker 1: mean he's is cool man?

577
00:27:17,960 --> 00:27:22,280
Speaker 2: It's like it's like before Eddie Murphy. Right, So there's

578
00:27:22,320 --> 00:27:26,000
Speaker 2: there's arguments with comedy where you can have higher status

579
00:27:26,000 --> 00:27:28,840
Speaker 2: and lower status than the crowd, right, you can be

580
00:27:28,880 --> 00:27:33,320
Speaker 2: above them or below them. For the most part, British

581
00:27:33,359 --> 00:27:38,040
Speaker 2: comedy and somewhat Australian comedy, definitely New Zealand comedy for

582
00:27:38,080 --> 00:27:41,480
Speaker 2: some reason, the comedian normally has a lower status.

583
00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:44,560
Speaker 1: Right, Oh really yeah, Like that's the thing, is it?

584
00:27:44,880 --> 00:27:50,879
Speaker 2: So like mister Bean, mister Bean, bumbling idiot, right, Frank

585
00:27:50,920 --> 00:27:56,879
Speaker 2: Spencer bumbling idiot? Right? Eddie Murphy cool right, being the

586
00:27:56,920 --> 00:28:01,240
Speaker 2: same as everyone in the audience, doesn't it's not funny,

587
00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:04,560
Speaker 2: you know? So? So like Cleice could play John Clees

588
00:28:04,560 --> 00:28:07,000
Speaker 2: could play above and below depending on what Sketchy did,

589
00:28:07,040 --> 00:28:09,640
Speaker 2: he could do above or below and so. But Eddie

590
00:28:09,720 --> 00:28:14,440
Speaker 2: Murphy was always cooler than I could ever fucking be, man,

591
00:28:14,920 --> 00:28:16,520
Speaker 2: cooler than I could ever be. And I met him.

592
00:28:16,680 --> 00:28:21,680
Speaker 2: I met him twice, and and you know, I met

593
00:28:21,720 --> 00:28:25,000
Speaker 2: a lot of famous people doing this job, and but

594
00:28:26,040 --> 00:28:28,800
Speaker 2: Eddie Murphy is the most starstruck I've been to meet,

595
00:28:28,880 --> 00:28:31,200
Speaker 2: to meet the human being. And I met him once

596
00:28:31,200 --> 00:28:34,880
Speaker 2: at James Packard's birthday party where I was employed to

597
00:28:34,920 --> 00:28:38,160
Speaker 2: be the entertainment and I was sitting in the kitchen.

598
00:28:38,240 --> 00:28:40,080
Speaker 2: Mariah Carey had paid for me to be there.

599
00:28:40,240 --> 00:28:41,880
Speaker 1: Is must a couple years ago then, Yeah.

600
00:28:41,760 --> 00:28:43,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, Mariah Carey, it's not recent.

601
00:28:44,440 --> 00:28:46,080
Speaker 1: It was Mike care would be a couple of years ago.

602
00:28:46,200 --> 00:28:47,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know this is before COVID.

603
00:28:47,640 --> 00:28:49,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, before covered. That's when they were engaged.

604
00:28:49,720 --> 00:28:52,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, when they're engaged. And so so I was in

605
00:28:52,040 --> 00:28:55,200
Speaker 2: the kitchen. I was in the kitchen, and I normally

606
00:28:55,240 --> 00:28:57,920
Speaker 2: don't do corporate gigs, but the money was right, and

607
00:28:57,960 --> 00:29:01,000
Speaker 2: that you know that whatever, right I was sitting in

608
00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:03,440
Speaker 2: the kitchen, I meant to be the surprise birthday gift.

609
00:29:03,520 --> 00:29:05,880
Speaker 2: You know, you're you're you're a wealthy man. You know

610
00:29:05,920 --> 00:29:09,400
Speaker 2: how it is right when you guys, don't you rich people?

611
00:29:09,440 --> 00:29:11,680
Speaker 2: You don't get presents? Do you get? You get other

612
00:29:11,760 --> 00:29:15,680
Speaker 2: human beings performing tricks? Right? You know, you buy experiences,

613
00:29:16,520 --> 00:29:19,960
Speaker 2: You're right, experiences rather than material because any material thing

614
00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:22,240
Speaker 2: you want you can get. But then every now and

615
00:29:22,280 --> 00:29:24,120
Speaker 2: I get someone go, I just bought you a thing

616
00:29:24,160 --> 00:29:26,360
Speaker 2: to go do this thing, go drag race a car.

617
00:29:26,480 --> 00:29:28,680
Speaker 2: Oh brilliant, because you never would have bought that for yourself,

618
00:29:29,120 --> 00:29:35,440
Speaker 2: you're right, right, So, so so I'm in the kitchen

619
00:29:35,520 --> 00:29:37,240
Speaker 2: when you go out and I'm shipping myself and then

620
00:29:37,360 --> 00:29:40,880
Speaker 2: our Pacino and Warren Batty and Leonardo DiCaprio and all

621
00:29:40,920 --> 00:29:43,520
Speaker 2: these people at this bloody dinner, right, and I'm sitting

622
00:29:43,520 --> 00:29:46,800
Speaker 2: there in the dressing room in the kitchen, being hidden

623
00:29:46,800 --> 00:29:48,560
Speaker 2: away and They've given me a meal, the same meal

624
00:29:48,600 --> 00:29:51,440
Speaker 2: as then I'm off of the kitchen of yourself and

625
00:29:51,600 --> 00:29:54,320
Speaker 2: Eddie Murphy comes in and I can't get impersonation. But

626
00:29:54,760 --> 00:29:57,440
Speaker 2: he walks up to one of the he was there too, Yeah,

627
00:29:57,480 --> 00:29:59,560
Speaker 2: he was there. He walks up to another catering people.

628
00:29:59,560 --> 00:30:01,680
Speaker 2: He goes, I need a solda or something. I sold

629
00:30:01,800 --> 00:30:03,800
Speaker 2: a drinker that is right, And he looked at me.

630
00:30:03,840 --> 00:30:06,400
Speaker 2: And I used to have a sitcom called Legit that

631
00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:11,160
Speaker 2: was an on FX and in that I had it

632
00:30:11,240 --> 00:30:13,600
Speaker 2: was based on a true story, but I had a

633
00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:16,280
Speaker 2: friend who was disabled, right, And he goes, oh, no you.

634
00:30:16,400 --> 00:30:17,880
Speaker 2: He goes, do you do the TV show with the

635
00:30:17,920 --> 00:30:21,560
Speaker 2: disabled boy? You need a show? He knew my shirt.

636
00:30:21,640 --> 00:30:26,560
Speaker 2: I was like, yeah, yeah, I do. I do do this.

637
00:30:26,640 --> 00:30:28,680
Speaker 2: He goes, what are you doing here? And I said,

638
00:30:29,800 --> 00:30:31,520
Speaker 2: I'm going to do this stand up for the dinner

639
00:30:31,560 --> 00:30:33,240
Speaker 2: party and he goes, there is nowhere that's going to

640
00:30:33,280 --> 00:30:34,760
Speaker 2: work out, and then he left and I was like,

641
00:30:34,880 --> 00:30:38,200
Speaker 2: oh no, my favorite comedian said, I've just got an

642
00:30:38,240 --> 00:30:42,360
Speaker 2: unachievable task. And this is a man who who Something

643
00:30:42,360 --> 00:30:45,600
Speaker 2: else I respect about Eddie Murphy is he respected stand

644
00:30:45,680 --> 00:30:49,520
Speaker 2: up comedy so much that when he stopped doing it.

645
00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:52,720
Speaker 2: He never dipped his toe back in again, because he

646
00:30:52,800 --> 00:30:55,120
Speaker 2: knew what it took to be at that level and

647
00:30:55,240 --> 00:30:57,480
Speaker 2: if he could. And it's very hard for Eddie Murphy

648
00:30:57,480 --> 00:30:59,480
Speaker 2: to get back to that level because where does he

649
00:30:59,520 --> 00:31:02,160
Speaker 2: try out material? Where does he go and do five

650
00:31:02,240 --> 00:31:05,040
Speaker 2: minutes where it's not every camera's out going Eddie Murphy?

651
00:31:05,200 --> 00:31:07,520
Speaker 2: How does he build a set? He can never build

652
00:31:07,520 --> 00:31:10,000
Speaker 2: a set again because too many people will document the

653
00:31:10,680 --> 00:31:14,000
Speaker 2: work in progress, and so he can't get up at

654
00:31:14,000 --> 00:31:15,880
Speaker 2: the improv on a Wednesday and have a go. So

655
00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:20,280
Speaker 2: I know for a fact that Netflix have offered him,

656
00:31:20,640 --> 00:31:22,840
Speaker 2: They've backed up money, trucks to his house for him

657
00:31:22,880 --> 00:31:25,600
Speaker 2: to do a stand up special, more money than anyone

658
00:31:25,600 --> 00:31:27,920
Speaker 2: would have ever been paid to do stand up. And

659
00:31:28,160 --> 00:31:30,680
Speaker 2: they've undernard and I've heard through people, Oh it's going

660
00:31:30,760 --> 00:31:33,360
Speaker 2: to happen, It's going to happen, and it hasn't happened yet,

661
00:31:33,520 --> 00:31:35,360
Speaker 2: and he hasn't done stand up. I don't reckon he's

662
00:31:35,360 --> 00:31:36,640
Speaker 2: done stand up in over thirty years.

663
00:31:37,120 --> 00:31:38,200
Speaker 1: It's because he doesn't need to.

664
00:31:38,440 --> 00:31:41,160
Speaker 2: He just he became a movie star, stop doing it,

665
00:31:41,200 --> 00:31:43,280
Speaker 2: and he respected it enough not to go back to

666
00:31:43,320 --> 00:31:47,520
Speaker 2: it because he couldn't, as I said, he couldn't develop,

667
00:31:48,520 --> 00:31:50,160
Speaker 2: he couldn't build it and get it to a stafe.

668
00:31:50,160 --> 00:31:52,040
Speaker 1: Can you explain that to me? Can because you say

669
00:31:52,040 --> 00:31:54,680
Speaker 1: that's so nonchalant, can you explain it to me? Like, so,

670
00:31:55,080 --> 00:31:58,200
Speaker 1: you know, in terms of building a show, what are

671
00:31:58,240 --> 00:31:58,600
Speaker 1: you going to do?

672
00:31:58,680 --> 00:31:58,760
Speaker 2: Go?

673
00:31:58,960 --> 00:32:01,480
Speaker 1: You're got to go pre things validating, Yeah, well you

674
00:32:01,560 --> 00:32:01,800
Speaker 1: got it.

675
00:32:01,960 --> 00:32:04,000
Speaker 2: What I do is many comics will go down and

676
00:32:04,080 --> 00:32:06,520
Speaker 2: just sort of do a joke and then try it out.

677
00:32:06,560 --> 00:32:10,320
Speaker 2: And if I got a new joke, I will wedge

678
00:32:10,320 --> 00:32:14,920
Speaker 2: it in between two bits that I know work and

679
00:32:14,960 --> 00:32:17,760
Speaker 2: then just slip in the joke because it might be gangbusters,

680
00:32:17,880 --> 00:32:19,400
Speaker 2: it might be weak, and if it.

681
00:32:19,400 --> 00:32:21,120
Speaker 1: Is weak, the jokes a bit of a theme.

682
00:32:21,160 --> 00:32:25,840
Speaker 2: Though it's a bit say at the moment, like, okay,

683
00:32:25,920 --> 00:32:29,800
Speaker 2: so when we're recording this yesterday there was an assassination

684
00:32:29,880 --> 00:32:33,760
Speaker 2: attempt on Donald Trump's life. I'm getting up at the

685
00:32:33,800 --> 00:32:37,680
Speaker 2: comedy store tonight, and I've got some things that i'll

686
00:32:37,800 --> 00:32:41,840
Speaker 2: I'm gonna do, you know, but I don't expect to

687
00:32:41,920 --> 00:32:45,760
Speaker 2: nail it tomorrow, but maybe three or four times in

688
00:32:45,840 --> 00:32:48,160
Speaker 2: I'll get it good. Right now, I can afford to

689
00:32:48,200 --> 00:32:50,680
Speaker 2: do that because I've got good jokes that I've been

690
00:32:50,680 --> 00:32:53,000
Speaker 2: doing for a year or so on either side of

691
00:32:53,040 --> 00:32:55,520
Speaker 2: that joke. But aniemur, if you can't do that because

692
00:32:55,520 --> 00:32:58,680
Speaker 2: the whole set's new, the whole set's new. If you

693
00:32:58,680 --> 00:33:00,600
Speaker 2: could just go down and say, I've got five minutes,

694
00:33:00,640 --> 00:33:01,959
Speaker 2: I want to try, but no one wants to hear

695
00:33:02,040 --> 00:33:03,840
Speaker 2: him do five minutes, and you can't. You know, if

696
00:33:03,880 --> 00:33:05,080
Speaker 2: he goes down to the comy club and I said,

697
00:33:05,080 --> 00:33:08,720
Speaker 2: they'll bring all the phones out, and the joke from

698
00:33:08,800 --> 00:33:12,440
Speaker 2: its infancy to when it's fully developed, is going to

699
00:33:12,480 --> 00:33:16,320
Speaker 2: be vastly different. And that's why we get so angry.

700
00:33:16,520 --> 00:33:19,560
Speaker 2: There's several reasons that, and people don't understand that comedians

701
00:33:19,560 --> 00:33:23,080
Speaker 2: get so angry with people videotape like their phones up

702
00:33:23,080 --> 00:33:23,520
Speaker 2: in the show.

703
00:33:23,600 --> 00:33:24,280
Speaker 1: That makes sense.

704
00:33:24,320 --> 00:33:26,600
Speaker 2: Now, music concerts, no one gives a fuck because, as

705
00:33:26,640 --> 00:33:28,200
Speaker 2: I said, it's old songs.

706
00:33:28,360 --> 00:33:29,960
Speaker 1: No they wanted to they want to make they want

707
00:33:29,960 --> 00:33:30,840
Speaker 1: to they want to stream it.

708
00:33:30,840 --> 00:33:32,239
Speaker 2: They don't want to stream it, they want to put

709
00:33:32,240 --> 00:33:34,520
Speaker 2: it on. They tell everywhere they're having a great time.

710
00:33:35,560 --> 00:33:38,440
Speaker 2: I don't want the person who's about to see me

711
00:33:38,480 --> 00:33:41,040
Speaker 2: to know to the punchline. I want to still surprise them,

712
00:33:41,240 --> 00:33:43,680
Speaker 2: and I don't want it recorded until I think the

713
00:33:43,760 --> 00:33:46,560
Speaker 2: joke's ready to record, till I'm happy with it, then

714
00:33:46,640 --> 00:33:49,920
Speaker 2: I'll record it right, But I don't want the work

715
00:33:49,960 --> 00:33:52,800
Speaker 2: in progress to be put out there. And so so

716
00:33:52,840 --> 00:33:56,720
Speaker 2: a lot of comedians Dave Chappelle, for example, just off

717
00:33:56,720 --> 00:33:59,720
Speaker 2: the top of your head, have started using these pouches

718
00:33:59,720 --> 00:34:01,640
Speaker 2: that you you put your phone in and then you

719
00:34:01,680 --> 00:34:05,840
Speaker 2: put the tag over the top and then your phone

720
00:34:05,880 --> 00:34:08,360
Speaker 2: is sealed and you can't open it back up, and

721
00:34:08,400 --> 00:34:10,399
Speaker 2: then pull your phone out afterwards. And it has made

722
00:34:10,440 --> 00:34:12,920
Speaker 2: shows really good. But I'm a cheap bastard. They have

723
00:34:13,040 --> 00:34:15,319
Speaker 2: that at the theater costs about seven grand. I'm like, ah,

724
00:34:15,480 --> 00:34:16,320
Speaker 2: fuck it.

725
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:17,799
Speaker 1: But you ask people put the phone away.

726
00:34:19,000 --> 00:34:21,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's signs up please do not videotape. And if

727
00:34:21,760 --> 00:34:23,399
Speaker 2: I see you do it, I'll ask you know, I said,

728
00:34:23,440 --> 00:34:24,680
Speaker 2: can you please put your phone? I'll do it in

729
00:34:24,719 --> 00:34:26,160
Speaker 2: the middle of a joke, Please put your phone now.

730
00:34:26,840 --> 00:34:30,520
Speaker 2: But people think you're being precious or something, but you're not.

731
00:34:30,600 --> 00:34:35,560
Speaker 2: And also it's not music. We're not all singing along.

732
00:34:35,800 --> 00:34:38,200
Speaker 2: You have I don't want you to miss it. I

733
00:34:38,200 --> 00:34:40,560
Speaker 2: don't want you to miss the joke. Well, then you

734
00:34:40,560 --> 00:34:43,080
Speaker 2: you've got to be focused and if you're texting or whatever,

735
00:34:43,200 --> 00:34:46,080
Speaker 2: or you think you're not, it's the same as driving.

736
00:34:46,400 --> 00:34:47,640
Speaker 2: Just keep your eyes on the road.

737
00:34:47,800 --> 00:34:50,360
Speaker 1: Man. Yeah, that may say. So, it's very interesting. So

738
00:34:50,400 --> 00:34:52,600
Speaker 1: when you say joke, though I don't I'm not a communist.

739
00:34:52,760 --> 00:34:55,399
Speaker 1: When you say joke, do you mean that thing? Yeah,

740
00:34:55,440 --> 00:34:58,840
Speaker 1: So it's like a thematic. It's like, for example, you

741
00:34:58,880 --> 00:35:01,359
Speaker 1: know something a bad gun control? Is that what you're

742
00:35:01,360 --> 00:35:01,759
Speaker 1: talking about?

743
00:35:01,800 --> 00:35:06,000
Speaker 2: That line controls the routine, and inside that routine there's

744
00:35:06,600 --> 00:35:10,000
Speaker 2: maybe thirty jokes, right, I don't know. I haven't watched

745
00:35:10,000 --> 00:35:14,400
Speaker 2: that routine back ever, but I would say there was.

746
00:35:14,840 --> 00:35:17,759
Speaker 2: It was. It was fourteen minutes long, and so in

747
00:35:17,800 --> 00:35:21,160
Speaker 2: that if the math's right, you want to have her

748
00:35:21,239 --> 00:35:23,840
Speaker 2: laugh at least on every twenty seconds. There's probably thirty

749
00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:26,440
Speaker 2: forty laughs in there. So they're the actual jokes in

750
00:35:26,440 --> 00:35:26,920
Speaker 2: the routine.

751
00:35:27,000 --> 00:35:30,160
Speaker 1: So you actually there is a structure. There is actually

752
00:35:30,440 --> 00:35:32,600
Speaker 1: a you know, just not stand up there just freeballing.

753
00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:33,880
Speaker 1: You actually got a structure.

754
00:35:34,760 --> 00:35:37,799
Speaker 2: For example, see you write anything down, I sort of

755
00:35:37,880 --> 00:35:40,160
Speaker 2: think of a joke, and then the best way to

756
00:35:40,200 --> 00:35:43,680
Speaker 2: write it is on stage, and then you just sort

757
00:35:43,680 --> 00:35:45,480
Speaker 2: of come up with a theme and you know, look,

758
00:35:45,560 --> 00:35:48,320
Speaker 2: the problem is now the thousand companies putting a thousand

759
00:35:48,320 --> 00:35:51,000
Speaker 2: clips online and all the people who tweet out a

760
00:35:51,080 --> 00:35:54,760
Speaker 2: joke and all these things, so you know, everything's sort

761
00:35:54,800 --> 00:35:57,160
Speaker 2: of being said. You're trying to put your original take

762
00:35:57,200 --> 00:35:58,880
Speaker 2: on it, but it's very hard now to come up

763
00:35:58,880 --> 00:36:03,120
Speaker 2: with a truly truly original one line because everyone's on

764
00:36:03,239 --> 00:36:06,120
Speaker 2: Twitter or x as it is the same. So at

765
00:36:06,120 --> 00:36:09,840
Speaker 2: the moment, like I'll say what I'm working on right now,

766
00:36:09,880 --> 00:36:12,360
Speaker 2: this is what I've never said this joke, right, this

767
00:36:12,440 --> 00:36:13,880
Speaker 2: is the this is the first time I'm going to

768
00:36:13,920 --> 00:36:16,879
Speaker 2: say this joke. Right, So, so at the moment, who's

769
00:36:16,960 --> 00:36:20,080
Speaker 2: the name of the kid who bloody shot Trump? It

770
00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:26,080
Speaker 2: was something Thomas Cooper Marx or something something like that,

771
00:36:26,440 --> 00:36:29,240
Speaker 2: Thomics Cooper Marx, and then you had John Wilkes Booth

772
00:36:29,320 --> 00:36:31,680
Speaker 2: and then you had Lee Harvey Oswald. I go, it's

773
00:36:31,719 --> 00:36:35,640
Speaker 2: these three names, you know, these three names. I'll be

774
00:36:35,680 --> 00:36:39,200
Speaker 2: watching out for Michael J. Fox, although I assume he

775
00:36:39,239 --> 00:36:44,160
Speaker 2: would miss, right. So that's the premise now, without a doubt.

776
00:36:44,560 --> 00:36:48,439
Speaker 2: Probably people who've done the done the aligned with John

777
00:36:48,480 --> 00:36:51,319
Speaker 2: Wilkes Booth and Lee Harvey Oswald and it does up.

778
00:36:51,320 --> 00:36:53,279
Speaker 2: But you just try to make your own little sort

779
00:36:53,280 --> 00:36:56,320
Speaker 2: of thing, and then you know, now, that's the core

780
00:36:56,560 --> 00:36:58,920
Speaker 2: of this routine, right, The core of the routine that

781
00:36:58,920 --> 00:37:01,200
Speaker 2: I'm going to try out is that little tiny punchline

782
00:37:01,239 --> 00:37:04,120
Speaker 2: about Michael J. Fox and naming those three names three

783
00:37:04,200 --> 00:37:08,320
Speaker 2: times and so, but that routine might become five minutes

784
00:37:09,000 --> 00:37:11,239
Speaker 2: because I might go off on a tangent about Michael J.

785
00:37:11,400 --> 00:37:13,680
Speaker 2: Fox and I might go whatever, And I won't know

786
00:37:13,840 --> 00:37:16,400
Speaker 2: that until I'm on stage and I hear the groan

787
00:37:16,440 --> 00:37:18,799
Speaker 2: from the audience and I rebuttal and then go back

788
00:37:18,840 --> 00:37:21,759
Speaker 2: and forth. And so all I know is that little

789
00:37:21,800 --> 00:37:24,960
Speaker 2: bit now, But I don't know what it will become.

790
00:37:24,800 --> 00:37:26,239
Speaker 1: Because you're waiting for the response I'm.

791
00:37:26,160 --> 00:37:28,960
Speaker 2: Waiting for, and I don't know if that punchline will

792
00:37:28,960 --> 00:37:31,400
Speaker 2: do well yet, and whether it needs a little bit

793
00:37:31,400 --> 00:37:34,200
Speaker 2: of finessing, or whether the joke needs to be a

794
00:37:34,239 --> 00:37:37,520
Speaker 2: bit harder or more aggressive, or it needs to be softer.

795
00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:39,319
Speaker 2: You know, I don't know where it's going.

796
00:37:39,239 --> 00:37:41,640
Speaker 1: To be in terms of aggressive you mean a little

797
00:37:41,680 --> 00:37:42,880
Speaker 1: bit more confronting.

798
00:37:42,680 --> 00:37:45,919
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, or whether I just have to There's there's

799
00:37:45,960 --> 00:37:48,239
Speaker 2: a few ways you can either tell the audience what

800
00:37:48,280 --> 00:37:51,080
Speaker 2: it's all about, or you can basically go, oh, I

801
00:37:51,120 --> 00:37:53,359
Speaker 2: think this, you know what I mean, and soften your

802
00:37:53,400 --> 00:37:56,799
Speaker 2: way into it, and sometimes the softer ways to get

803
00:37:56,840 --> 00:38:00,000
Speaker 2: into a really offensive joke, you know. And there's there's

804
00:38:01,280 --> 00:38:06,160
Speaker 2: I would like someone to one day do a mathematical equation.

805
00:38:05,840 --> 00:38:07,960
Speaker 1: On that's because that's what I'm thinking as you're talking.

806
00:38:08,040 --> 00:38:09,000
Speaker 1: I'm thinking of mathematics.

807
00:38:09,160 --> 00:38:12,360
Speaker 2: I'm okay. So there's the mathematics of the more offensive

808
00:38:12,440 --> 00:38:16,200
Speaker 2: the joke, the bigger the laugh. Right, you can you

809
00:38:16,239 --> 00:38:18,759
Speaker 2: can talk about anything, but you have to get a

810
00:38:18,760 --> 00:38:21,560
Speaker 2: big laugh. So if you bring up something, let's go

811
00:38:21,640 --> 00:38:23,680
Speaker 2: as offensive as we can. Let's say you make a

812
00:38:23,760 --> 00:38:28,000
Speaker 2: joke about Holocaust, right, you better be getting yourself a

813
00:38:28,000 --> 00:38:30,759
Speaker 2: real good laugh. Right. If you don't get a real

814
00:38:30,800 --> 00:38:32,400
Speaker 2: good laugh, you're just being offensive.

815
00:38:32,719 --> 00:38:33,000
Speaker 1: Right.

816
00:38:33,040 --> 00:38:36,120
Speaker 2: But if you have a payoff that's good enough and

817
00:38:36,239 --> 00:38:38,760
Speaker 2: witty enough, then you can really get away with anything.

818
00:38:39,040 --> 00:38:41,279
Speaker 2: But I've had times when it hasn't worked. And that's

819
00:38:41,280 --> 00:38:43,680
Speaker 2: why I don't want your fucking videotape in the show

820
00:38:43,800 --> 00:38:45,000
Speaker 2: because I'm having to go here.

821
00:38:45,360 --> 00:38:47,279
Speaker 1: So you're going to try that at the comedy store.

822
00:38:47,360 --> 00:38:49,719
Speaker 2: To try that the comedy store, not nothing about the Holocaust,

823
00:38:50,680 --> 00:38:52,600
Speaker 2: but I'm going to try. I'm going to try the

824
00:38:52,680 --> 00:38:55,680
Speaker 2: Lee Harvey Oswell, John Wilkes Booth, Michael J. Fox routine.

825
00:38:55,719 --> 00:38:57,520
Speaker 2: That's going to be my new bit that I'm going

826
00:38:57,600 --> 00:38:59,359
Speaker 2: to try, you know, tomorrow night.

827
00:39:11,520 --> 00:39:14,759
Speaker 1: So, Jim Jefferies is would you call yourself? Would you

828
00:39:14,760 --> 00:39:17,839
Speaker 1: call Jim Jefferies? There's two personalities? But would you call

829
00:39:17,880 --> 00:39:19,919
Speaker 1: Jim Jeffries a real observer of life? I mean that

830
00:39:20,080 --> 00:39:20,839
Speaker 1: is that who you are.

831
00:39:22,200 --> 00:39:24,920
Speaker 2: I don't know if I'm wanky enough to say that

832
00:39:25,000 --> 00:39:27,840
Speaker 2: about myself, but I no, But you don't.

833
00:39:27,680 --> 00:39:31,880
Speaker 1: Have to, you know, you're genuinely curious about everything.

834
00:39:32,000 --> 00:39:36,359
Speaker 2: Yeah. Look, but you know, I think I got personality

835
00:39:36,400 --> 00:39:38,360
Speaker 2: traits that I you know, if you take me to

836
00:39:38,400 --> 00:39:40,480
Speaker 2: a party, I'm going to ramble on the whole time,

837
00:39:40,920 --> 00:39:42,840
Speaker 2: and I'm going to annoy a lot of fucking people

838
00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:45,520
Speaker 2: and other stuff, you know, and it's it's probably better

839
00:39:45,560 --> 00:39:48,600
Speaker 2: on stage. And so I found an outlet for the

840
00:39:48,640 --> 00:39:51,480
Speaker 2: skill that I have in life, which is talking underwater,

841
00:39:52,120 --> 00:39:55,560
Speaker 2: you know. So I would have been good on radio.

842
00:39:55,600 --> 00:39:57,759
Speaker 2: But even now, I didn't let you fucking talk, did

843
00:39:57,760 --> 00:39:58,880
Speaker 2: I know? But I shouldn't.

844
00:39:59,000 --> 00:40:01,239
Speaker 1: But but I should you talk because that's my role.

845
00:40:01,400 --> 00:40:04,400
Speaker 1: But but but what I'm sort of interested in is

846
00:40:04,640 --> 00:40:06,920
Speaker 1: are you walking around the streets and looking at the

847
00:40:06,920 --> 00:40:10,320
Speaker 1: newspapers or watching the television and saying, fuck, that's that's interesting.

848
00:40:10,320 --> 00:40:15,839
Speaker 2: There's a little bit, but mostly most mostly routines come

849
00:40:15,880 --> 00:40:20,080
Speaker 2: from these days is all my friends that can stand

850
00:40:20,120 --> 00:40:23,320
Speaker 2: up comedians. They're all my friends, They're all the people

851
00:40:23,360 --> 00:40:28,080
Speaker 2: I know, and so when the news happens, or when

852
00:40:28,080 --> 00:40:31,319
Speaker 2: there's something happening in your life, you ring them up.

853
00:40:31,440 --> 00:40:35,200
Speaker 2: And it's very hard to soundboard routines on non comedians.

854
00:40:35,239 --> 00:40:38,400
Speaker 2: They can't see it, and other comedians can see it,

855
00:40:38,440 --> 00:40:40,480
Speaker 2: and they'll go add this line to take away that line,

856
00:40:40,520 --> 00:40:43,040
Speaker 2: blah blah blah. Other comedians can see. My wife can't

857
00:40:43,040 --> 00:40:45,839
Speaker 2: see it. I've tested out so many jokeson and she can't.

858
00:40:45,920 --> 00:40:47,520
Speaker 2: She goes, why is that funny? And then she sees

859
00:40:47,520 --> 00:40:49,960
Speaker 2: it live and I can see her laughing in the audience,

860
00:40:50,480 --> 00:40:52,840
Speaker 2: but she can't. She can't see it. So so for

861
00:40:52,880 --> 00:40:55,600
Speaker 2: the most part, when you say observations, you make an observation.

862
00:40:56,000 --> 00:40:58,120
Speaker 2: You ring up your best mate and you go, what

863
00:40:58,160 --> 00:40:59,719
Speaker 2: do you think of this? And then he goes, I

864
00:40:59,760 --> 00:41:01,440
Speaker 2: got a bit, And you help each out with you

865
00:41:02,080 --> 00:41:04,439
Speaker 2: and then you and then you go on. Yeah, there's

866
00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:07,440
Speaker 2: there's a good camaraderie for the most part between comedians.

867
00:41:07,480 --> 00:41:11,760
Speaker 2: There's very few comedians who hate each other or anything

868
00:41:11,800 --> 00:41:14,560
Speaker 2: like that. For the most part, we're all pretty solid

869
00:41:14,640 --> 00:41:15,120
Speaker 2: with each.

870
00:41:15,000 --> 00:41:16,040
Speaker 1: Other, you know, pretty collaborative.

871
00:41:16,239 --> 00:41:19,279
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like, well, not collaborative because you're still working

872
00:41:19,280 --> 00:41:22,520
Speaker 2: by yourself. But but you help out your mates, you

873
00:41:22,520 --> 00:41:24,279
Speaker 2: know what I mean. And but often if you get

874
00:41:24,320 --> 00:41:27,080
Speaker 2: off stage, even a comic who doesn't know you very

875
00:41:27,120 --> 00:41:30,400
Speaker 2: well will say to you, I have a tag. I

876
00:41:30,440 --> 00:41:33,080
Speaker 2: have a tag and just another punchline to add on

877
00:41:33,120 --> 00:41:35,399
Speaker 2: to the end of the joke to get one extra life.

878
00:41:36,239 --> 00:41:37,760
Speaker 2: And so we give each other tags.

879
00:41:37,880 --> 00:41:38,400
Speaker 1: Do you do that?

880
00:41:38,480 --> 00:41:38,640
Speaker 2: Yeah?

881
00:41:38,719 --> 00:41:39,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, well yeah, if I.

882
00:41:39,840 --> 00:41:42,480
Speaker 2: Can help another comic gap, for sure. Yeah, if I

883
00:41:42,560 --> 00:41:44,520
Speaker 2: got the lines there, routine is there. If I got

884
00:41:44,520 --> 00:41:47,120
Speaker 2: a line that can help them out, yeah, yeah, for sure,

885
00:41:47,560 --> 00:41:51,800
Speaker 2: teach them tell them no because because also, comedy doesn't

886
00:41:51,840 --> 00:41:55,480
Speaker 2: read very well. Yeah, I never understood comedy reads terribly.

887
00:41:55,600 --> 00:41:59,160
Speaker 2: See look at it this way, right, So comedy is

888
00:41:59,560 --> 00:42:02,520
Speaker 2: a visual and audio art form, right, You're gonna have

889
00:42:02,600 --> 00:42:06,280
Speaker 2: silent comedies and you're going to visual and audio art form.

890
00:42:06,640 --> 00:42:10,319
Speaker 2: It never reads brilliantly. You know, if you were to.

891
00:42:10,280 --> 00:42:11,600
Speaker 1: Read I mean in a text.

892
00:42:12,160 --> 00:42:14,399
Speaker 2: Yeah, even I find it very hard when I'm reading

893
00:42:14,400 --> 00:42:17,120
Speaker 2: a comedy script to sort of see it, you know.

894
00:42:17,280 --> 00:42:23,560
Speaker 2: Sometimes you know, if you were to read novelization of

895
00:42:23,600 --> 00:42:27,400
Speaker 2: the Three Stooges, how depressing would that be? Yeah, you

896
00:42:27,440 --> 00:42:27,879
Speaker 2: know what I mean.

897
00:42:28,120 --> 00:42:28,880
Speaker 1: It's stupid.

898
00:42:29,239 --> 00:42:34,400
Speaker 2: It's a story of three men with mental diminished mental

899
00:42:34,440 --> 00:42:39,840
Speaker 2: capacity trying to look for work. They're homeless, three homeless

900
00:42:39,880 --> 00:42:43,200
Speaker 2: men would diminished mental capacity looking for work during the

901
00:42:43,239 --> 00:42:47,239
Speaker 2: Great Depression Mo LARRYN Curly Yeah, and then everything is

902
00:42:47,280 --> 00:42:49,040
Speaker 2: like then he smashed him in the head with a bat.

903
00:42:49,080 --> 00:42:54,320
Speaker 2: It sounds like a horror film, like it doesn't read funny,

904
00:42:54,400 --> 00:42:56,880
Speaker 2: but those three men made it really, really funny.

905
00:42:56,960 --> 00:42:57,720
Speaker 1: So is it the theater?

906
00:42:57,800 --> 00:42:57,960
Speaker 2: Though?

907
00:42:58,040 --> 00:43:00,400
Speaker 1: The theater of them is their theater that makes it funny.

908
00:43:00,680 --> 00:43:03,720
Speaker 2: People have funny bones, don't they some people Some people

909
00:43:03,760 --> 00:43:06,120
Speaker 2: have funny bones, and some people don't have funny bones.

910
00:43:06,120 --> 00:43:09,040
Speaker 2: And that's why, you know, you can't teach people to

911
00:43:09,080 --> 00:43:13,200
Speaker 2: be funny. But over time they can learn if they

912
00:43:13,239 --> 00:43:15,839
Speaker 2: are are funny, they can learn to be good comedians,

913
00:43:16,000 --> 00:43:18,200
Speaker 2: you know what I mean. But you can't inherently teach

914
00:43:18,239 --> 00:43:21,520
Speaker 2: someone to be funny in the same way you can't

915
00:43:21,640 --> 00:43:26,080
Speaker 2: make someone musical. You know you can't. I do believe

916
00:43:26,120 --> 00:43:28,319
Speaker 2: that over time, you could probably teach an actor.

917
00:43:29,760 --> 00:43:30,200
Speaker 1: It's funny.

918
00:43:30,680 --> 00:43:32,680
Speaker 2: I think acting is all confidence in it.

919
00:43:32,800 --> 00:43:36,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, and understanding the routine so no, none, what's in

920
00:43:36,400 --> 00:43:39,359
Speaker 1: front of it, and being confident You're right. It's funny

921
00:43:39,400 --> 00:43:41,319
Speaker 1: you should say about music because my mother maybe learned

922
00:43:41,360 --> 00:43:45,800
Speaker 1: the piano up until you hc but I played piano

923
00:43:45,880 --> 00:43:48,799
Speaker 1: like America around music. I could play it, I knew

924
00:43:48,840 --> 00:43:50,120
Speaker 1: what I was doing. I could read the music, but

925
00:43:50,120 --> 00:43:51,279
Speaker 1: I didn't have a musical bun on my.

926
00:43:51,280 --> 00:43:53,200
Speaker 2: Body didn't have the musicality.

927
00:43:53,200 --> 00:43:55,319
Speaker 1: Whereas my brother I could listen to something and walk

928
00:43:55,320 --> 00:43:57,080
Speaker 1: going out start playing it. I could never do that

929
00:43:57,120 --> 00:43:58,480
Speaker 1: I could put in front of I could do it.

930
00:43:58,640 --> 00:44:00,799
Speaker 1: And I think your point it's a really good point,

931
00:44:00,880 --> 00:44:03,160
Speaker 1: like probably and I've never thought about it commedity, But

932
00:44:03,160 --> 00:44:04,560
Speaker 1: the same applies to Community's what you're saying.

933
00:44:04,760 --> 00:44:07,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, but funny is inherent in you. You have

934
00:44:07,080 --> 00:44:12,520
Speaker 2: funny bones. So I got two brothers, and I don't

935
00:44:12,560 --> 00:44:14,680
Speaker 2: think I'm being rude to either of them by saying this.

936
00:44:14,880 --> 00:44:17,160
Speaker 2: One of my brothers and he knows which one is

937
00:44:17,200 --> 00:44:21,040
Speaker 2: also got the funny gene. My father has the funny gene,

938
00:44:21,640 --> 00:44:24,240
Speaker 2: and my mother and my other brother do not. They

939
00:44:24,360 --> 00:44:28,840
Speaker 2: didn't have the funny gene. My mother had amazing stage presence.

940
00:44:29,040 --> 00:44:30,759
Speaker 2: She was a school teacher that when she walked in

941
00:44:30,760 --> 00:44:32,680
Speaker 2: the room, all the kids sat up and stopped talking.

942
00:44:33,600 --> 00:44:36,400
Speaker 2: She had nothing to say. My dad has no stage presence,

943
00:44:36,400 --> 00:44:38,120
Speaker 2: and he's one of the funniest people I've ever met.

944
00:44:38,120 --> 00:44:41,040
Speaker 2: It could have gone the opposite way for me and

945
00:44:41,440 --> 00:44:43,480
Speaker 2: my brother's been funny. And I look at my nephews

946
00:44:43,480 --> 00:44:48,759
Speaker 2: and nieces and my sons and me and the funny brother,

947
00:44:48,840 --> 00:44:50,680
Speaker 2: we look at them like we're on the Jedi Council,

948
00:44:50,800 --> 00:44:55,040
Speaker 2: like the force is strong with this one. And I

949
00:44:55,080 --> 00:44:57,000
Speaker 2: don't think they'll be upset. But out of my nephews

950
00:44:57,000 --> 00:45:02,359
Speaker 2: and nieces, I have one niece who's got it. She's

951
00:45:02,360 --> 00:45:06,120
Speaker 2: got it in Spain. And my eldest boy, but we

952
00:45:06,160 --> 00:45:07,640
Speaker 2: don't know about the three year old yet. I sense

953
00:45:07,680 --> 00:45:09,479
Speaker 2: he might have it. My oldest boy has it as well.

954
00:45:10,040 --> 00:45:10,600
Speaker 1: Really, missus.

955
00:45:11,600 --> 00:45:13,720
Speaker 2: My wife's My wife's got a good sense of humor.

956
00:45:13,880 --> 00:45:17,080
Speaker 2: She's very funny. And my oldest boy's mother is very

957
00:45:17,120 --> 00:45:21,080
Speaker 2: funny person. But my my son, he's he's got it.

958
00:45:21,120 --> 00:45:23,920
Speaker 2: He's got the he's got the gene. And my niece

959
00:45:23,920 --> 00:45:26,160
Speaker 2: has the gene. The three year old, I think has

960
00:45:26,160 --> 00:45:27,880
Speaker 2: the gene. But it's too hard to tell with this

961
00:45:27,960 --> 00:45:31,120
Speaker 2: youngly whether he's gonna he's gonna have the force strong

962
00:45:31,160 --> 00:45:33,799
Speaker 2: with him. But it's a wonderful moment when you when

963
00:45:33,800 --> 00:45:36,120
Speaker 2: you go, oh, he's gottish. And I think it's no

964
00:45:36,320 --> 00:45:41,439
Speaker 2: different than an athlete throwing the ball to their son

965
00:45:41,480 --> 00:45:43,680
Speaker 2: and going, oh, you just did that little thing with

966
00:45:43,719 --> 00:45:46,600
Speaker 2: his hands, that little flick on hand coordination, Yeah, your

967
00:45:46,600 --> 00:45:50,600
Speaker 2: hand eye coordination or just little intuitive things. You know,

968
00:45:50,640 --> 00:45:52,840
Speaker 2: it to be a great like rugby league player or

969
00:45:52,920 --> 00:45:55,319
Speaker 2: something that it's not just enough to be fast and

970
00:45:55,440 --> 00:45:58,279
Speaker 2: strong and and and you know, have good hands. There's

971
00:45:58,320 --> 00:46:01,280
Speaker 2: also got to you've got to feel the players around

972
00:46:01,320 --> 00:46:04,319
Speaker 2: you when the pass, and stuff like intuition that that

973
00:46:04,440 --> 00:46:06,720
Speaker 2: other players don't have this great instinct.

974
00:46:07,040 --> 00:46:08,640
Speaker 1: It makes sure you look like you're more time than

975
00:46:08,719 --> 00:46:12,120
Speaker 1: everybody else. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Andrew John's like so much

976
00:46:12,160 --> 00:46:13,960
Speaker 1: of you do you follow footy mate?

977
00:46:14,000 --> 00:46:15,719
Speaker 2: I'm trying to get the North Sydney Bears back in

978
00:46:15,760 --> 00:46:16,120
Speaker 2: the Cup.

979
00:46:16,400 --> 00:46:18,040
Speaker 1: There might end up being in the West Australian team.

980
00:46:18,280 --> 00:46:19,759
Speaker 2: If you think I don't know, I'm part of the

981
00:46:19,760 --> 00:46:21,080
Speaker 2: consortium trying to get them going.

982
00:46:21,960 --> 00:46:23,600
Speaker 1: I told them, but do you think do you think

983
00:46:23,640 --> 00:46:26,759
Speaker 1: they should be? But do you think they should keep

984
00:46:26,760 --> 00:46:30,080
Speaker 1: the name bears? Along with me, I'm not investing money

985
00:46:30,080 --> 00:46:32,680
Speaker 1: if they don't keep the name Bears. I'm not investing

986
00:46:32,680 --> 00:46:33,920
Speaker 1: money unless they're red and black.

987
00:46:34,440 --> 00:46:38,000
Speaker 2: I don't care if there's a new I want stripes. Yeah,

988
00:46:38,640 --> 00:46:41,000
Speaker 2: just those colors, just the red and black, the red

989
00:46:41,040 --> 00:46:42,880
Speaker 2: and black and the Bears. And I don't want to

990
00:46:42,920 --> 00:46:45,880
Speaker 2: change the logo. Just keep the bit underneath that says

991
00:46:45,960 --> 00:46:47,840
Speaker 2: nineteen oh eight. That bit's wild.

992
00:46:47,960 --> 00:46:50,080
Speaker 1: They were they nineteen were the nineteen.

993
00:46:50,000 --> 00:46:52,240
Speaker 2: Eight They were one of the original teams, the original

994
00:46:52,520 --> 00:46:55,960
Speaker 2: foundation clubs, Foundation Club right nineteen oh eight where it's

995
00:46:56,000 --> 00:46:59,359
Speaker 2: is North Sitneo just right Perth. That's all we got

996
00:46:59,360 --> 00:47:01,839
Speaker 2: to do, right And then the jersey they can play

997
00:47:01,960 --> 00:47:03,759
Speaker 2: around with it and put their own stamp on it

998
00:47:03,760 --> 00:47:06,279
Speaker 2: for Western Australia. But I if I move back to

999
00:47:06,320 --> 00:47:08,719
Speaker 2: Australia and I intend on doing this in my life,

1000
00:47:08,719 --> 00:47:10,920
Speaker 2: I don't intend on retiring and living in America. And

1001
00:47:11,000 --> 00:47:13,000
Speaker 2: I love America. I'm very proud to be an American

1002
00:47:13,000 --> 00:47:16,319
Speaker 2: citizen in America has done a lot for me. My

1003
00:47:16,360 --> 00:47:21,200
Speaker 2: wife's British. But if one day I'll live in Australia

1004
00:47:21,239 --> 00:47:23,400
Speaker 2: again when I was an old man. I'll live in

1005
00:47:23,440 --> 00:47:26,280
Speaker 2: Australia and I'm going to live in Perth. I love Perth.

1006
00:47:26,400 --> 00:47:26,759
Speaker 2: By the way.

1007
00:47:26,800 --> 00:47:28,239
Speaker 1: They tell me you really hit the ball out of

1008
00:47:28,239 --> 00:47:29,120
Speaker 1: the park with the misses.

1009
00:47:29,600 --> 00:47:32,239
Speaker 2: She's all right, my wife killed. I'll do all right,

1010
00:47:32,280 --> 00:47:32,640
Speaker 2: I'll do it.

1011
00:47:33,080 --> 00:47:35,200
Speaker 1: I don't know, I don't know. I just thought, but

1012
00:47:35,680 --> 00:47:37,520
Speaker 1: my team here. I just want to saying, my god,

1013
00:47:37,719 --> 00:47:38,320
Speaker 1: he's missus.

1014
00:47:38,960 --> 00:47:41,239
Speaker 2: I mean, your wife's a good looking woman. Yeah, she's

1015
00:47:41,239 --> 00:47:42,040
Speaker 2: too good looking for me.

1016
00:47:42,160 --> 00:47:44,319
Speaker 1: I was going to say, what's the deal? How did

1017
00:47:44,360 --> 00:47:44,680
Speaker 1: you meet it?

1018
00:47:45,080 --> 00:47:46,200
Speaker 2: I got more money than her.

1019
00:47:47,640 --> 00:47:48,040
Speaker 1: Helpful.

1020
00:47:49,320 --> 00:47:51,840
Speaker 2: I met my wife on an app dating app. There

1021
00:47:51,880 --> 00:47:55,560
Speaker 2: is a dating app called Riot, which is for the famous,

1022
00:47:55,640 --> 00:47:59,560
Speaker 2: rich and the good looking. My wife. My wife is

1023
00:47:59,600 --> 00:48:01,560
Speaker 2: an actor and at that stage she was in a

1024
00:48:01,600 --> 00:48:04,959
Speaker 2: TV drama called The Resident, which is one of those

1025
00:48:05,560 --> 00:48:10,520
Speaker 2: medical procedural, you know shows. And I was doing the

1026
00:48:10,600 --> 00:48:13,360
Speaker 2: Jim Jeffrey Show at that stage, and I was on

1027
00:48:13,440 --> 00:48:18,880
Speaker 2: the app and we paired up and it's just so happened.

1028
00:48:18,880 --> 00:48:22,759
Speaker 2: She lived three hundred meters from my Yeah, and she

1029
00:48:23,080 --> 00:48:25,560
Speaker 2: uh and she's just a couple of streets up around

1030
00:48:25,600 --> 00:48:30,719
Speaker 2: the corner right in London, and and so she was

1031
00:48:30,880 --> 00:48:32,480
Speaker 2: she was living up the road. I was at that

1032
00:48:32,600 --> 00:48:34,799
Speaker 2: stage a single dad and my ex was living down

1033
00:48:34,840 --> 00:48:37,960
Speaker 2: the road, and I I had my son one week on,

1034
00:48:37,960 --> 00:48:40,960
Speaker 2: one week off, and so on those weeks off, you know,

1035
00:48:41,040 --> 00:48:45,560
Speaker 2: I was dating, you know, trying to get me you know. Yeah,

1036
00:48:45,680 --> 00:48:48,719
Speaker 2: Well they are a job interviews, aren't they. That's every

1037
00:48:48,800 --> 00:48:51,840
Speaker 2: day to a job interview, trying to try to employ someone.

1038
00:48:52,800 --> 00:48:55,680
Speaker 2: We'll give you a three month trial period, see how

1039
00:48:55,719 --> 00:48:58,719
Speaker 2: it goes. Yeah, you know what I mean. And so

1040
00:48:58,800 --> 00:49:01,560
Speaker 2: I started dating my wife. I think she wouldn't have

1041
00:49:01,560 --> 00:49:03,640
Speaker 2: given me a second or third day if I didn't

1042
00:49:03,680 --> 00:49:07,279
Speaker 2: live so close. She was just like, yeah, there's a

1043
00:49:07,320 --> 00:49:09,319
Speaker 2: shag around the corner, you know what I mean.

1044
00:49:09,480 --> 00:49:10,960
Speaker 1: She was like, she practical, All that's good.

1045
00:49:11,040 --> 00:49:13,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, I can shag this bloke until I find someone better.

1046
00:49:13,560 --> 00:49:16,759
Speaker 2: And I won her over because my wife's British and

1047
00:49:17,000 --> 00:49:19,719
Speaker 2: there's a footage of me on the Bill marshow I

1048
00:49:19,760 --> 00:49:22,120
Speaker 2: got a bit heated in a discussion on the bill Marsha,

1049
00:49:22,160 --> 00:49:24,600
Speaker 2: and I told Pierce Morgan to go fuck himself, and

1050
00:49:24,640 --> 00:49:26,120
Speaker 2: I gave him the finger and they had to cut

1051
00:49:26,160 --> 00:49:28,640
Speaker 2: to an ad break, and yeah, I got all fired up.

1052
00:49:28,640 --> 00:49:31,080
Speaker 1: And what was the top we are going over?

1053
00:49:32,000 --> 00:49:35,239
Speaker 2: Look? This was back when Trump had just gone in.

1054
00:49:35,440 --> 00:49:37,800
Speaker 2: And do you remember the Muslim band?

1055
00:49:37,920 --> 00:49:38,160
Speaker 1: Yeah?

1056
00:49:38,239 --> 00:49:38,480
Speaker 2: I do.

1057
00:49:38,760 --> 00:49:41,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, And you had a whole comment that.

1058
00:49:41,520 --> 00:49:44,160
Speaker 2: It wasn't it wasn't they say, I wasn't a Muslim band.

1059
00:49:44,160 --> 00:49:45,960
Speaker 2: It wasn't a Muslim band. It was just people from

1060
00:49:46,000 --> 00:49:49,160
Speaker 2: Arab countries. But they they weren't being allowed in even

1061
00:49:49,160 --> 00:49:51,359
Speaker 2: with their green card. You know. It was like at

1062
00:49:51,360 --> 00:49:54,200
Speaker 2: that stage, it was like a thing. And so Pierce Morgan,

1063
00:49:54,600 --> 00:49:56,840
Speaker 2: this is what really happened. That wasn't what I was

1064
00:49:56,840 --> 00:50:00,600
Speaker 2: fired up about. I just didn't like Pierce Morgan. Right now,

1065
00:50:00,760 --> 00:50:02,840
Speaker 2: Pierce Morgan and me got into an argument. I can't

1066
00:50:03,080 --> 00:50:04,840
Speaker 2: for the life of me, I can't remember what it is.

1067
00:50:04,880 --> 00:50:08,640
Speaker 2: I haven't been on Twitter for over seven years, but.

1068
00:50:08,640 --> 00:50:11,040
Speaker 1: You got the arguments on Twitter that yes.

1069
00:50:11,000 --> 00:50:15,120
Speaker 2: So so on Twitter on Twitter way before that. Pierce

1070
00:50:15,200 --> 00:50:17,840
Speaker 2: Morgan and me got into a little verbal ultimately like

1071
00:50:17,880 --> 00:50:22,200
Speaker 2: a little written altercation. Then cut to and I didn't

1072
00:50:22,200 --> 00:50:24,160
Speaker 2: think anything of it. I was just happy, you know,

1073
00:50:24,719 --> 00:50:26,400
Speaker 2: get a bit of press from each other, you know.

1074
00:50:26,920 --> 00:50:29,040
Speaker 2: And then and then I was booked to the Bill

1075
00:50:29,080 --> 00:50:31,960
Speaker 2: Marsha and he sends me a direct message and he

1076
00:50:32,040 --> 00:50:34,160
Speaker 2: go all he writes to me. He goes, I'll be

1077
00:50:34,160 --> 00:50:36,520
Speaker 2: sitting six feet away from you. You better bring your

1078
00:50:36,520 --> 00:50:40,200
Speaker 2: a game. And I was like, fuck, that can't right

1079
00:50:42,200 --> 00:50:45,360
Speaker 2: like this, it's on. If he fucking starts, and a

1080
00:50:45,440 --> 00:50:47,440
Speaker 2: little bit of autism kicked off. I was like, I

1081
00:50:47,520 --> 00:50:50,480
Speaker 2: got talking about he comes at me and so so

1082
00:50:50,560 --> 00:50:53,759
Speaker 2: I'm sitting there and he brings up that and I said,

1083
00:50:53,760 --> 00:50:56,279
Speaker 2: you're full of fucking shit, mate. I said, you're just

1084
00:50:56,320 --> 00:50:59,040
Speaker 2: happy that you're your friends with the president. Mate, that's

1085
00:50:59,080 --> 00:51:00,879
Speaker 2: all you're happy about because you were on a little

1086
00:51:00,920 --> 00:51:03,359
Speaker 2: fucking game show and you can suck up to that blake.

1087
00:51:03,400 --> 00:51:05,080
Speaker 2: You're a fucking dickhead, you know. I went on. I

1088
00:51:05,080 --> 00:51:07,360
Speaker 2: went him a bit like that, and he goes, oh, please,

1089
00:51:07,680 --> 00:51:10,319
Speaker 2: you're losing your audience. And I turned to the crowd.

1090
00:51:10,360 --> 00:51:12,640
Speaker 2: Now this could have been a career ending moment, right.

1091
00:51:12,680 --> 00:51:14,839
Speaker 2: I turned to the crowd. I went, have I lost you?

1092
00:51:14,920 --> 00:51:19,600
Speaker 2: If they were silent, I'm done for Yeah, cooked cook, Yeah,

1093
00:51:19,719 --> 00:51:23,239
Speaker 2: I go, have I lost you? And they went and

1094
00:51:23,280 --> 00:51:25,880
Speaker 2: I went, what are you fuck like? I went for it,

1095
00:51:26,600 --> 00:51:28,319
Speaker 2: and then they had to cut do an ad break right,

1096
00:51:28,600 --> 00:51:31,520
Speaker 2: and my social media, the whole world was for me,

1097
00:51:31,680 --> 00:51:34,280
Speaker 2: was going crazy in that moment. The whole internet started

1098
00:51:34,280 --> 00:51:38,200
Speaker 2: talking about her anyway. So I said to my wife

1099
00:51:38,239 --> 00:51:40,000
Speaker 2: and she goes, I like the Bill Marsha. That was

1100
00:51:40,040 --> 00:51:42,680
Speaker 2: her favorite comedian, Bill Maher And I said, oh, I

1101
00:51:42,719 --> 00:51:45,760
Speaker 2: told Pierce Morgan to fuck off on the Bill Marsha.

1102
00:51:45,800 --> 00:51:48,920
Speaker 2: And then in that moment, she went she watched. She

1103
00:51:48,960 --> 00:51:51,360
Speaker 2: didn't she didn't know it was me, but then she goes,

1104
00:51:51,440 --> 00:51:54,920
Speaker 2: you're the bloke and she I went to the bathroom,

1105
00:51:55,280 --> 00:51:57,200
Speaker 2: and I came back and she was on her phone

1106
00:51:57,239 --> 00:52:00,360
Speaker 2: and she's talking to her mum because my wife's quite poshing. Listen,

1107
00:52:00,400 --> 00:52:02,919
Speaker 2: so she still calls her parents mummy and daddy as

1108
00:52:02,960 --> 00:52:04,480
Speaker 2: they do, you know, with that type of thing. And

1109
00:52:04,560 --> 00:52:07,560
Speaker 2: she goes, she goes, mummy, remember the man who told

1110
00:52:07,560 --> 00:52:10,359
Speaker 2: Pierce Morgan to fuck off? I'm at dinner with him

1111
00:52:10,440 --> 00:52:14,640
Speaker 2: right now. And so me and Pierce have no problem anymore.

1112
00:52:14,640 --> 00:52:16,960
Speaker 2: Because I wouldn't have met my my wife wouldn't have

1113
00:52:16,960 --> 00:52:18,719
Speaker 2: married me. Unless I told him to fuck off.

1114
00:52:18,920 --> 00:52:20,520
Speaker 1: So did you reconnect me?

1115
00:52:21,000 --> 00:52:23,200
Speaker 2: Well, I'll tell you what the other day, I got

1116
00:52:23,200 --> 00:52:26,399
Speaker 2: no problem with Peter Morgan. So after the Pierce Morgan thing,

1117
00:52:26,880 --> 00:52:29,680
Speaker 2: people got online and spread it and all that type

1118
00:52:29,680 --> 00:52:31,359
Speaker 2: of stuff, and he tried to sort of say, oh,

1119
00:52:32,000 --> 00:52:34,320
Speaker 2: pull up some old jokes where I said offensive things

1120
00:52:34,360 --> 00:52:36,560
Speaker 2: and try to make the audience turn on me a

1121
00:52:36,600 --> 00:52:43,520
Speaker 2: bit and JK rowlings like she said. Watching Pierce Morgan

1122
00:52:43,600 --> 00:52:47,719
Speaker 2: get told the fuck off on TV was as satisfying

1123
00:52:47,800 --> 00:52:51,480
Speaker 2: as I hoped it would be. Right And Pierce Morgan,

1124
00:52:51,560 --> 00:52:53,399
Speaker 2: he must had a real fucking bag up his ass

1125
00:52:53,400 --> 00:52:56,400
Speaker 2: about the whole thing, because he goes, I'm hardly going

1126
00:52:56,440 --> 00:52:59,320
Speaker 2: to be told off by a woman who writes books

1127
00:52:59,360 --> 00:53:03,920
Speaker 2: about wizards. He like, mate, that fucking only the Bible

1128
00:53:03,960 --> 00:53:07,600
Speaker 2: is so more. Yeah, literally, only the Bible is so more.

1129
00:53:07,880 --> 00:53:10,480
Speaker 2: Like you can make anything.

1130
00:53:10,280 --> 00:53:12,399
Speaker 1: And that's been around for two thousand year selling so yeah,

1131
00:53:12,400 --> 00:53:13,760
Speaker 1: but she's only been around short period.

1132
00:53:14,120 --> 00:53:17,840
Speaker 2: Make anything seem small by breaking it down. The wizards,

1133
00:53:17,880 --> 00:53:21,680
Speaker 2: you know, and so and so so. Pierce Morgan's son

1134
00:53:22,480 --> 00:53:27,240
Speaker 2: has I believe a Hogwarts tattoo, and so he posts

1135
00:53:27,280 --> 00:53:30,440
Speaker 2: a picture of the tattoo and goes, well, this has

1136
00:53:30,480 --> 00:53:33,440
Speaker 2: become awkward, right. So from that moment on, I was

1137
00:53:33,480 --> 00:53:35,640
Speaker 2: sort of enjoying it a little bit. I was like, okay,

1138
00:53:35,680 --> 00:53:38,959
Speaker 2: so Pierce, it all dies down. I got no problem

1139
00:53:39,000 --> 00:53:41,439
Speaker 2: with Pierce Morgan, and I don't think he does either.

1140
00:53:41,480 --> 00:53:44,520
Speaker 2: I think he he attracts that type of attention. That's

1141
00:53:44,520 --> 00:53:47,680
Speaker 2: what he wants. Maybe that little moment backfired for him,

1142
00:53:47,680 --> 00:53:49,840
Speaker 2: but for the most part, when he's talking about Megan

1143
00:53:49,880 --> 00:53:52,720
Speaker 2: Markle or something like that, he wants to be talked about.

1144
00:53:52,760 --> 00:53:54,680
Speaker 2: That's his thing, you know, that's his game, you know.

1145
00:53:55,560 --> 00:53:58,840
Speaker 2: And so he was doing the interview with the lady

1146
00:53:58,840 --> 00:54:03,600
Speaker 2: from Baby Reindeer, you know, the real Perle who was

1147
00:54:03,600 --> 00:54:06,440
Speaker 2: a stalker, and I love Baby Reindeer. And then I

1148
00:54:06,520 --> 00:54:09,680
Speaker 2: really I had to tune into Pierce's shade to watch

1149
00:54:09,719 --> 00:54:12,640
Speaker 2: that thing. And so I put out a little post

1150
00:54:12,760 --> 00:54:17,040
Speaker 2: on my social media. I said, I said, Piers Morgan

1151
00:54:17,080 --> 00:54:18,680
Speaker 2: did a very good job here, and I put a

1152
00:54:18,719 --> 00:54:21,879
Speaker 2: picture and a link to the thing, and he reposted it.

1153
00:54:22,000 --> 00:54:24,759
Speaker 2: So I don't know if we're cool, but I think

1154
00:54:24,760 --> 00:54:27,719
Speaker 2: we're on the on the right track, you know. So

1155
00:54:27,719 --> 00:54:29,080
Speaker 2: I me and Pierce are probably good.

1156
00:54:29,239 --> 00:54:30,840
Speaker 1: That's a great story.

1157
00:54:30,920 --> 00:54:32,839
Speaker 2: If I met Piers Morgan, as I said, I'd give

1158
00:54:32,840 --> 00:54:37,760
Speaker 2: the man a hug. Mate. He he My son wouldn't

1159
00:54:37,760 --> 00:54:41,439
Speaker 2: have been born without him, you know what I mean. Yeah,

1160
00:54:41,640 --> 00:54:42,920
Speaker 2: so fucking thanks, Pierce.

1161
00:54:43,080 --> 00:54:44,000
Speaker 1: Can we talk about Trump?

1162
00:54:44,360 --> 00:54:44,600
Speaker 2: Yeah?

1163
00:54:44,719 --> 00:54:46,440
Speaker 1: Sure, I mean, I know it.

1164
00:54:46,400 --> 00:54:48,720
Speaker 2: Gets you into a lot of trouble because the problem

1165
00:54:48,760 --> 00:54:51,880
Speaker 2: with the Trump thing is you're damned if you do.

1166
00:54:51,880 --> 00:54:53,640
Speaker 2: You're damned if you don't, you know, as a comedian,

1167
00:54:53,640 --> 00:54:56,200
Speaker 2: because half the nation bloody well, not even half half

1168
00:54:56,200 --> 00:54:58,719
Speaker 2: the nation's Republican, and then then twenty percent of them

1169
00:54:58,719 --> 00:55:01,359
Speaker 2: a super trumpy right, and the people who are really

1170
00:55:01,400 --> 00:55:05,239
Speaker 2: into Trump, they get very angry when you joke about him.

1171
00:55:05,280 --> 00:55:07,839
Speaker 2: But it's very hard as comedian not to joke about him,

1172
00:55:07,880 --> 00:55:10,839
Speaker 2: especially during that first run when he's going grab him

1173
00:55:10,880 --> 00:55:12,279
Speaker 2: by the pussy. We didn't think he was going to win,

1174
00:55:12,760 --> 00:55:14,480
Speaker 2: so to t he's a man that's saying grab him

1175
00:55:14,520 --> 00:55:16,640
Speaker 2: by the pussy and all the type of stuff. Of

1176
00:55:16,680 --> 00:55:19,440
Speaker 2: course we were going to make jokes about it, you know.

1177
00:55:19,760 --> 00:55:24,759
Speaker 2: And I'm not a big Trump fan, I think, but

1178
00:55:24,880 --> 00:55:26,440
Speaker 2: on mine, you know.

1179
00:55:26,520 --> 00:55:28,239
Speaker 1: A big Trump fund or not a big Republican fan.

1180
00:55:28,600 --> 00:55:32,080
Speaker 2: No, no, no, no, I'm okay, so more a liberal. You Look. Look,

1181
00:55:32,120 --> 00:55:33,880
Speaker 2: I'll be honest with you. If I was to vote

1182
00:55:34,200 --> 00:55:37,520
Speaker 2: here in Australia, I'm a bit more right wing than

1183
00:55:37,560 --> 00:55:38,160
Speaker 2: you think I am.

1184
00:55:38,640 --> 00:55:41,719
Speaker 1: Right, I'm not Dune's watching this, by the way.

1185
00:55:41,800 --> 00:55:44,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I'm Yeah, I'm more right wing than you

1186
00:55:44,640 --> 00:55:46,600
Speaker 2: think I am. That's all I'm going to say on that.

1187
00:55:46,680 --> 00:55:50,920
Speaker 2: But when I'm in America, they think I'm basically a

1188
00:55:50,920 --> 00:55:55,440
Speaker 2: bloody communist because being right wing in being left wing

1189
00:55:55,440 --> 00:55:58,920
Speaker 2: in America means, Okay, I believe in gun control, I

1190
00:55:58,960 --> 00:56:02,640
Speaker 2: believe in universe, health care right, and I believe in

1191
00:56:02,640 --> 00:56:05,200
Speaker 2: a woman's right to do what she wants with her body.

1192
00:56:06,120 --> 00:56:13,000
Speaker 2: So those three things, healthcare, guns, and abortion, they're the

1193
00:56:13,120 --> 00:56:17,520
Speaker 2: bloody they're the poster children for the fucking Republican Party.

1194
00:56:17,600 --> 00:56:19,960
Speaker 2: That's what they want. And in America, as long as

1195
00:56:20,000 --> 00:56:22,279
Speaker 2: they keep talking about those three things over and over,

1196
00:56:22,320 --> 00:56:24,160
Speaker 2: and they can fuck you in the ars with taxes,

1197
00:56:24,200 --> 00:56:27,719
Speaker 2: all they fucking want, right, because all we're arguing is

1198
00:56:27,760 --> 00:56:31,360
Speaker 2: about is abortion, and they did in the debate abortion, guns,

1199
00:56:31,520 --> 00:56:38,160
Speaker 2: health care right. So I am left leaning in America

1200
00:56:38,239 --> 00:56:41,840
Speaker 2: and that makes me or liberal. Yeah, I'm somewhat of

1201
00:56:41,840 --> 00:56:44,600
Speaker 2: a socialist. I believe in a society where we take

1202
00:56:44,640 --> 00:56:49,239
Speaker 2: care of our most vulnerable. I believe in housing for

1203
00:56:50,480 --> 00:56:54,319
Speaker 2: I believe in housing for the homeless. I believe. You know,

1204
00:56:54,360 --> 00:56:59,160
Speaker 2: all these different things, but you know fact that there's

1205
00:56:59,200 --> 00:57:02,600
Speaker 2: lots of tax things that I'm right wing about. You know,

1206
00:57:02,920 --> 00:57:05,080
Speaker 2: there's a lot of shit that I'm very right wing about.

1207
00:57:05,200 --> 00:57:08,560
Speaker 2: But as an Australian, I'd be right. I'm a right

1208
00:57:08,600 --> 00:57:11,920
Speaker 2: wing Australian, left wing American. So I'm in a terrible

1209
00:57:11,960 --> 00:57:16,720
Speaker 2: position in my career because people from the left, the

1210
00:57:16,800 --> 00:57:19,760
Speaker 2: extreme left, they don't like me. People from the extreme

1211
00:57:19,880 --> 00:57:23,479
Speaker 2: right fucking hate me. And my fans are the eighty

1212
00:57:23,520 --> 00:57:27,200
Speaker 2: percent of the population who are in the middle who

1213
00:57:27,280 --> 00:57:29,080
Speaker 2: for most of us, we just shut the fuck up,

1214
00:57:29,440 --> 00:57:30,720
Speaker 2: just going don't want to talk to you either. It

1215
00:57:30,720 --> 00:57:32,760
Speaker 2: would be about it right. The problem I have is

1216
00:57:32,760 --> 00:57:34,760
Speaker 2: when the right wing go for me, I don't have

1217
00:57:34,840 --> 00:57:36,800
Speaker 2: the left defending me. And when the left gave for me,

1218
00:57:36,800 --> 00:57:38,000
Speaker 2: I don't have the right thing. And how do they

1219
00:57:38,040 --> 00:57:42,040
Speaker 2: go through like you, people say troll and saying rubbish

1220
00:57:42,040 --> 00:57:43,640
Speaker 2: about your untruths about.

1221
00:57:43,360 --> 00:57:45,200
Speaker 1: You or what do you do? Do you just ignore it?

1222
00:57:45,960 --> 00:57:48,040
Speaker 2: Do you respond? No? No, no, no, I don't even

1223
00:57:48,080 --> 00:57:51,120
Speaker 2: buddy bother about it. There's only one thing that matters

1224
00:57:51,200 --> 00:57:53,080
Speaker 2: in my career. There's only one thing that matters, and

1225
00:57:53,080 --> 00:57:56,400
Speaker 2: that's ticket sales. Yeah, right, And if they drop, I'll

1226
00:57:56,440 --> 00:57:58,640
Speaker 2: ask what's going on? But until then, you know, you

1227
00:57:58,760 --> 00:58:01,680
Speaker 2: just keep you just keep. Like even now, there's people

1228
00:58:01,800 --> 00:58:05,000
Speaker 2: watching this podcast who don't agree with half the shit

1229
00:58:05,080 --> 00:58:06,680
Speaker 2: I've said already, you know what I mean. But I

1230
00:58:06,720 --> 00:58:09,520
Speaker 2: hope that you understand that we're all different, aren't we,

1231
00:58:09,640 --> 00:58:12,840
Speaker 2: and you've got little things about you that you believe

1232
00:58:12,880 --> 00:58:15,360
Speaker 2: in that I'm not going to agree with this idea

1233
00:58:15,440 --> 00:58:17,080
Speaker 2: that we have to be all one way or all

1234
00:58:17,080 --> 00:58:19,640
Speaker 2: the other. I'm right wing on some subjects and left

1235
00:58:19,680 --> 00:58:22,280
Speaker 2: wing on other subjects, and it depends I go subject

1236
00:58:22,320 --> 00:58:26,240
Speaker 2: to subject. You know, you're never gonna I don't think

1237
00:58:28,640 --> 00:58:32,000
Speaker 2: I think I pay too much taxes in California. I

1238
00:58:32,080 --> 00:58:34,480
Speaker 2: know I do too much and I don't get anything

1239
00:58:34,480 --> 00:58:38,200
Speaker 2: in fucking return. I'm very right wing about that, you know,

1240
00:58:38,320 --> 00:58:42,960
Speaker 2: because American tax system is fuck in California's fust fucked,

1241
00:58:43,400 --> 00:58:46,320
Speaker 2: you know, it's fucked totally, It's fucked. And now they're

1242
00:58:47,200 --> 00:58:51,640
Speaker 2: and if I have to hear another Democrats say, ah,

1243
00:58:52,080 --> 00:58:55,000
Speaker 2: the one percent need to be paying more taxes. They

1244
00:58:55,040 --> 00:58:58,640
Speaker 2: fucking are, they are. It's the one percent of the

1245
00:58:58,640 --> 00:59:02,240
Speaker 2: one percent who's not paying. You know, you start getting

1246
00:59:02,240 --> 00:59:04,640
Speaker 2: tax money from fucking Amazon, What are you bothering me for?

1247
00:59:04,720 --> 00:59:07,240
Speaker 2: I'm paying through the fucking wazoo, you know what I mean.

1248
00:59:07,640 --> 00:59:11,280
Speaker 2: So it's like there's always a scapegoat, you know that

1249
00:59:11,480 --> 00:59:13,840
Speaker 2: these people aren't doing enough, and this is why our society.

1250
00:59:14,040 --> 00:59:16,480
Speaker 2: So in America, I pay all these fucking taxes, and

1251
00:59:16,520 --> 00:59:19,120
Speaker 2: what do I get in the end? More military? I

1252
00:59:19,200 --> 00:59:21,920
Speaker 2: get more military, more military. Fix the fucking pothole in

1253
00:59:21,960 --> 00:59:23,640
Speaker 2: the street, and get rid of all the homeless people

1254
00:59:23,680 --> 00:59:26,440
Speaker 2: and put them into fucking housing. Work on the fucking

1255
00:59:26,520 --> 00:59:28,960
Speaker 2: mental health of all the soldiers that have come back

1256
00:59:28,960 --> 00:59:30,680
Speaker 2: from the wars and are all fucked up in their head.

1257
00:59:30,680 --> 00:59:32,480
Speaker 2: How about we work on that for a little bit

1258
00:59:32,680 --> 00:59:35,520
Speaker 2: and stop spending it on more missiles. It turns out

1259
00:59:35,680 --> 00:59:39,160
Speaker 2: that in America, guess what, they've made enough weapons. They've

1260
00:59:39,200 --> 00:59:41,680
Speaker 2: made enough weapons the last forever. And I used to

1261
00:59:41,760 --> 00:59:43,600
Speaker 2: think that, oh no, we've got to be strong because

1262
00:59:43,760 --> 00:59:46,760
Speaker 2: you know what about Russia and China. Have you been

1263
00:59:46,840 --> 00:59:48,720
Speaker 2: fucking what? They can't take over the Ukraine?

1264
00:59:48,800 --> 00:59:51,520
Speaker 1: Mate, you're worried about Russia together.

1265
00:59:51,720 --> 00:59:56,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, they've got the Russians have technology from fucking Top

1266
00:59:56,560 --> 01:00:00,040
Speaker 2: Gun and not Maverick, the original Top game, just that

1267
01:00:00,160 --> 01:00:03,280
Speaker 2: old shit. And the Chinese we were writing about them

1268
01:00:03,320 --> 01:00:08,480
Speaker 2: for fucking ever. They set a spy balloon, not a drone.

1269
01:00:08,800 --> 01:00:12,280
Speaker 2: They set a spy balloon over America. For days. Yeah,

1270
01:00:12,320 --> 01:00:14,920
Speaker 2: for three days on the news we talked about the

1271
01:00:14,960 --> 01:00:20,120
Speaker 2: spy balloon. The slowest moving largest vehicle that mankind's ever created.

1272
01:00:20,400 --> 01:00:23,280
Speaker 2: Is what they said. We've got enough guns, we've got

1273
01:00:23,360 --> 01:00:26,320
Speaker 2: enough weapons. We're fucking good, start spending it on the

1274
01:00:26,360 --> 01:00:29,600
Speaker 2: actual people. And so me saying, start spending on the

1275
01:00:29,600 --> 01:00:36,160
Speaker 2: people healthcare, housing, that's called socialism, and socialism in America

1276
01:00:37,040 --> 01:00:40,480
Speaker 2: might as well be called communism. That's how they when

1277
01:00:40,520 --> 01:00:43,440
Speaker 2: they hear that word, they hear the word communism. And

1278
01:00:43,520 --> 01:00:48,120
Speaker 2: so I will never talk on stage in America about

1279
01:00:48,160 --> 01:00:52,000
Speaker 2: healthcare because I've tried doing it, and they'll never understand. Now,

1280
01:00:52,200 --> 01:00:54,280
Speaker 2: they will never see why that's a good thing. They'll go,

1281
01:00:54,520 --> 01:00:57,000
Speaker 2: but why should I be paying something when other people

1282
01:00:57,040 --> 01:01:00,280
Speaker 2: aren't paying enough? But da, it's just like dude, just

1283
01:01:00,560 --> 01:01:02,480
Speaker 2: and part of their problems is that they're next to Canada,

1284
01:01:02,520 --> 01:01:05,640
Speaker 2: and the Canadian healthcare systems not the best. You know,

1285
01:01:05,680 --> 01:01:08,520
Speaker 2: the Canadian healthcare system is everybody gets the same healthcare,

1286
01:01:08,640 --> 01:01:11,200
Speaker 2: a homeless person to the Prime minister gets the same healthcare.

1287
01:01:11,280 --> 01:01:14,000
Speaker 2: With the Australian and British system, where you can have

1288
01:01:14,120 --> 01:01:17,320
Speaker 2: public healthcare plus you can have private on top, there's

1289
01:01:17,320 --> 01:01:20,800
Speaker 2: no private on top in Canada, right, So they're always

1290
01:01:20,840 --> 01:01:23,600
Speaker 2: going those people up there are waiting too long for

1291
01:01:23,640 --> 01:01:27,680
Speaker 2: their surgeries, because really, what is healthcare? What is private healthcare?

1292
01:01:27,840 --> 01:01:30,480
Speaker 2: All private healthcare is I get to jump the queue

1293
01:01:30,520 --> 01:01:32,840
Speaker 2: for my surgery and when I'm in hospital, I get

1294
01:01:32,880 --> 01:01:37,080
Speaker 2: my own room. That's the only difference in public too. Whatever. Yeah,

1295
01:01:37,320 --> 01:01:39,160
Speaker 2: I'm facking gone. I've probably lost a lot of fans

1296
01:01:39,160 --> 01:01:40,000
Speaker 2: with this rant right now.

1297
01:01:40,000 --> 01:01:42,480
Speaker 1: So when you when you it's sort of interesting to

1298
01:01:42,480 --> 01:01:44,560
Speaker 1: me because when you go off to say like Austin, Texas,

1299
01:01:44,560 --> 01:01:48,640
Speaker 1: which is you know, red territory, fair.

1300
01:01:48,560 --> 01:01:50,520
Speaker 2: Well not Austin is the blue and the Sea of Red?

1301
01:01:50,680 --> 01:01:51,040
Speaker 2: Is that right?

1302
01:01:51,080 --> 01:01:54,480
Speaker 1: Because because I did listen to one of your shows

1303
01:01:54,480 --> 01:01:56,480
Speaker 1: there and you had them going, you had them in

1304
01:01:56,480 --> 01:01:57,080
Speaker 1: the part of your hand.

1305
01:01:57,120 --> 01:02:00,120
Speaker 2: Are you actually came to my show and ostin there, brit.

1306
01:01:59,760 --> 01:02:03,280
Speaker 1: And I'm just joking, you were, but I have listened

1307
01:02:03,320 --> 01:02:06,560
Speaker 1: to it. But you had him and but you were

1308
01:02:06,560 --> 01:02:07,520
Speaker 1: bagging the ship out of Trump.

1309
01:02:08,120 --> 01:02:13,160
Speaker 2: That was in Nashville, Nashville, say a horse of a different.

1310
01:02:16,080 --> 01:02:18,240
Speaker 1: Fully read so as opposed to the opposite here and

1311
01:02:18,240 --> 01:02:21,240
Speaker 1: astraight of course, but red blue. But anyway, but but

1312
01:02:21,360 --> 01:02:23,680
Speaker 1: you had him going and they loved it. You were

1313
01:02:23,680 --> 01:02:25,080
Speaker 1: bagging the ship out of Trump. Yeah.

1314
01:02:25,120 --> 01:02:26,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, they have no problem with that. And there's also

1315
01:02:26,800 --> 01:02:31,320
Speaker 2: a lot of Republicans who are Trump Republicans. You know,

1316
01:02:31,400 --> 01:02:33,360
Speaker 2: they want to go back. Remember when we thought that,

1317
01:02:33,400 --> 01:02:36,680
Speaker 2: like George W. Bush was a nutjob, warmhongering tybel thing.

1318
01:02:36,720 --> 01:02:38,880
Speaker 2: And now he's a delightful old man that dances around

1319
01:02:38,920 --> 01:02:40,520
Speaker 2: a bit before you know what I mean. He's fun,

1320
01:02:40,520 --> 01:02:42,840
Speaker 2: the little fell I'll tell you a Texas story about

1321
01:02:43,400 --> 01:02:48,080
Speaker 2: So I was playing I Believe It's Dallas, and I'd

1322
01:02:48,120 --> 01:02:50,040
Speaker 2: done the gun control thing, and before I went down

1323
01:02:50,080 --> 01:02:54,400
Speaker 2: to play Dallas, I had to cancel the show a

1324
01:02:54,400 --> 01:03:01,400
Speaker 2: few months earlier because there was a gun threat to you, yeah,

1325
01:03:01,480 --> 01:03:03,280
Speaker 2: to the theater. Someone was going to come and shoot

1326
01:03:03,320 --> 01:03:08,240
Speaker 2: up the theater. And so Texas is the only place, incidentally,

1327
01:03:08,280 --> 01:03:10,919
Speaker 2: where we had metal detectors for the shows, and people

1328
01:03:11,000 --> 01:03:12,160
Speaker 2: had to turn in their guns and we had a

1329
01:03:12,160 --> 01:03:15,440
Speaker 2: tup of weir contata everybody guns that you get it

1330
01:03:15,480 --> 01:03:18,320
Speaker 2: back after class. You can't have it in the show.

1331
01:03:19,000 --> 01:03:21,600
Speaker 2: And they and they felt unsafe without their gun, you know.

1332
01:03:22,760 --> 01:03:24,800
Speaker 2: But anyway, so the gun control thing, even with what

1333
01:03:24,840 --> 01:03:27,320
Speaker 2: happened with Trump the other day, with assassination, there's people

1334
01:03:27,360 --> 01:03:31,120
Speaker 2: now have been writing to me saying, oh, well, where

1335
01:03:31,200 --> 01:03:34,600
Speaker 2: was your gun control now? And you're like doing exactly

1336
01:03:34,640 --> 01:03:36,160
Speaker 2: what it is. First of all, he shouldnt have had

1337
01:03:36,200 --> 01:03:39,760
Speaker 2: a gun, and men that knew what they were doing

1338
01:03:40,560 --> 01:03:44,800
Speaker 2: eliminated the threat. People seemed to think that if all

1339
01:03:44,800 --> 01:03:47,800
Speaker 2: the punters in the crowd all had their guns, maybe

1340
01:03:47,840 --> 01:03:49,400
Speaker 2: you wouldn't have gotten up on that tower or something.

1341
01:03:49,400 --> 01:03:50,800
Speaker 2: But then you'd be you know what I mean. But

1342
01:03:50,840 --> 01:03:52,520
Speaker 2: if those gunshots went off, they a would have pulled

1343
01:03:52,520 --> 01:03:54,040
Speaker 2: it out. We wouldn't have known who the shooter was.

1344
01:03:54,080 --> 01:03:56,040
Speaker 2: It would have been fucking mayhem. You need an US

1345
01:03:56,040 --> 01:04:00,320
Speaker 2: and their mentality, you know. Anyway, So I I had

1346
01:04:00,320 --> 01:04:02,200
Speaker 2: to cancel me gig to go back to Texas and

1347
01:04:02,200 --> 01:04:04,439
Speaker 2: then they reschedule it and the threat hadn't really gone

1348
01:04:04,440 --> 01:04:07,640
Speaker 2: away in so I was like, all right, I got

1349
01:04:07,680 --> 01:04:09,520
Speaker 2: to do the show, and I don't want people to panic,

1350
01:04:10,800 --> 01:04:12,959
Speaker 2: and I don't think I don't think the threat's real,

1351
01:04:13,360 --> 01:04:16,440
Speaker 2: so there's no point telling you. So we go back

1352
01:04:16,880 --> 01:04:20,560
Speaker 2: to the theater and I rang the cops up and

1353
01:04:20,600 --> 01:04:22,040
Speaker 2: I said, can we have a sort of bit more

1354
01:04:22,040 --> 01:04:24,000
Speaker 2: of a presence at the show? And they said, well,

1355
01:04:24,040 --> 01:04:27,160
Speaker 2: you know, we we can. You can pay the charge.

1356
01:04:27,160 --> 01:04:30,560
Speaker 2: So in America you can buy cops in uniform on

1357
01:04:30,680 --> 01:04:33,720
Speaker 2: their off time. There's their second job to do your

1358
01:04:33,760 --> 01:04:37,080
Speaker 2: personal security for it, which is what I did. So

1359
01:04:37,160 --> 01:04:40,320
Speaker 2: I bought I believe eight or nine cops and I

1360
01:04:40,360 --> 01:04:41,960
Speaker 2: had two on the edge of the stage and I

1361
01:04:42,000 --> 01:04:44,640
Speaker 2: had them at each exit door, so there was a

1362
01:04:44,640 --> 01:04:47,120
Speaker 2: big and then they're metal detected. In it was I've

1363
01:04:47,160 --> 01:04:50,200
Speaker 2: never seen a comedy show with more sort of security.

1364
01:04:51,280 --> 01:04:55,200
Speaker 2: And I'm in my dressing room. I got there two

1365
01:04:55,200 --> 01:04:57,680
Speaker 2: hours before the show, and I normally get there about

1366
01:04:57,720 --> 01:04:59,840
Speaker 2: thirty minutes before the show, but because of this in

1367
01:05:00,080 --> 01:05:01,720
Speaker 2: and then I wanted to know what was going to

1368
01:05:01,800 --> 01:05:05,480
Speaker 2: happen and all the protocols in it. And I'm in

1369
01:05:05,520 --> 01:05:07,120
Speaker 2: my dressing room. In the dressing room, next to me,

1370
01:05:07,160 --> 01:05:09,640
Speaker 2: all the cops are being briefed, and they're all sitting

1371
01:05:09,640 --> 01:05:12,360
Speaker 2: around there, and then and the police officer goes, Okay,

1372
01:05:12,360 --> 01:05:15,120
Speaker 2: I'm gonna need to have I'm gonna need one of

1373
01:05:15,160 --> 01:05:16,880
Speaker 2: you on each door. You can pick your door. I

1374
01:05:16,920 --> 01:05:18,400
Speaker 2: don't care which door you want to pick, you know,

1375
01:05:19,400 --> 01:05:21,120
Speaker 2: And who wants to be the two cops at the

1376
01:05:21,200 --> 01:05:23,960
Speaker 2: edge of the stage right. And one of the cops

1377
01:05:23,960 --> 01:05:26,760
Speaker 2: goes like this, Hey, why are we even here, sarge?

1378
01:05:27,200 --> 01:05:31,920
Speaker 2: And he goes, well, this this particular comedian has been

1379
01:05:31,960 --> 01:05:36,880
Speaker 2: getting death threats. Well why has he been getting death threats? Well,

1380
01:05:37,160 --> 01:05:40,800
Speaker 2: he does a routine about gun control. And then one

1381
01:05:40,800 --> 01:05:43,080
Speaker 2: of the cops who was paid to protect me, he said,

1382
01:05:43,520 --> 01:05:45,360
Speaker 2: maybe he should learn to shut his fucking mouth.

1383
01:05:45,400 --> 01:05:50,520
Speaker 1: Then, oh, my god, as you feel, I don't.

1384
01:05:50,360 --> 01:05:52,000
Speaker 2: Reckon this Caun's got a dove in front of a

1385
01:05:52,000 --> 01:05:53,920
Speaker 2: bullet between me and you, I reckon I might be

1386
01:05:54,320 --> 01:05:57,000
Speaker 2: left out there. You know that same cop you had

1387
01:05:57,000 --> 01:05:59,560
Speaker 2: a big tash and he had those boots over the pants.

1388
01:05:59,760 --> 01:06:02,240
Speaker 2: He's like a highway cop sort of guy. And every

1389
01:06:02,320 --> 01:06:05,360
Speaker 2: joke you just sort of throughout the show. He wasn't

1390
01:06:05,360 --> 01:06:07,640
Speaker 2: having a good time. He didn't like me or what

1391
01:06:07,720 --> 01:06:09,240
Speaker 2: I had to say. I was a pain in the ass.

1392
01:06:09,240 --> 01:06:11,120
Speaker 1: But I think it's really funny the way you sort

1393
01:06:11,120 --> 01:06:14,520
Speaker 1: of talk about Trump in terms of his simplicity, the

1394
01:06:14,560 --> 01:06:17,640
Speaker 1: way he sort of speaks his simplicity in his speech,

1395
01:06:17,800 --> 01:06:20,720
Speaker 1: his language, his topics, his content, Like how do you

1396
01:06:20,760 --> 01:06:22,480
Speaker 1: get away with it? Like do you ever get a

1397
01:06:22,480 --> 01:06:23,800
Speaker 1: phone call from Trump's people?

1398
01:06:24,960 --> 01:06:28,960
Speaker 2: No one's ever said they don't worry about things like that.

1399
01:06:29,040 --> 01:06:32,520
Speaker 2: Now I said about Trump, I said, I had some

1400
01:06:32,600 --> 01:06:39,760
Speaker 2: clip that went good about about how it was a

1401
01:06:39,760 --> 01:06:44,080
Speaker 2: fucking routine. It went viral. There was a routine about

1402
01:06:44,440 --> 01:06:46,360
Speaker 2: what was it about. I was just like, don't be

1403
01:06:46,400 --> 01:06:49,960
Speaker 2: an asshole, and just like you know, I can't. I

1404
01:06:50,040 --> 01:06:51,920
Speaker 2: can't remember what it was. It was something. It was

1405
01:06:51,960 --> 01:06:55,080
Speaker 2: something about the lead with love or something. It was

1406
01:06:55,080 --> 01:06:57,560
Speaker 2: a very sort of love versus hate. Love versus hate

1407
01:06:57,720 --> 01:06:59,720
Speaker 2: was my routine. You love versus hate, and if you.

1408
01:07:00,120 --> 01:07:03,919
Speaker 1: Love, won't always be hate on hate don't work hate.

1409
01:07:04,000 --> 01:07:07,320
Speaker 1: Hate love can get onto sometimes love can beat hate,

1410
01:07:07,400 --> 01:07:10,040
Speaker 1: not always. And he said it sound like to a hippie.

1411
01:07:11,360 --> 01:07:14,160
Speaker 2: That was the routine that I did, right, thing right,

1412
01:07:14,240 --> 01:07:17,160
Speaker 2: so so love can beat hate and all this type

1413
01:07:17,200 --> 01:07:19,320
Speaker 2: of stuff. And it was something that I just sort

1414
01:07:19,320 --> 01:07:21,360
Speaker 2: of said in passing like maybe he said it a

1415
01:07:21,360 --> 01:07:23,040
Speaker 2: couple of times, and I said it on the recording,

1416
01:07:23,680 --> 01:07:25,280
Speaker 2: just thinking it wouldn't make the cart and it went

1417
01:07:25,360 --> 01:07:27,800
Speaker 2: viral and that type of stuff. And then I did

1418
01:07:27,800 --> 01:07:30,360
Speaker 2: a few jokes on my TV show about him, and

1419
01:07:30,360 --> 01:07:32,840
Speaker 2: then I did the grab him by the pussy routine.

1420
01:07:32,880 --> 01:07:34,760
Speaker 2: I did a whole grab him by the bus and

1421
01:07:34,760 --> 01:07:38,360
Speaker 2: he was just a very easy, sort of buffoonish sort

1422
01:07:38,360 --> 01:07:43,360
Speaker 2: of a man to make to make fun out of that.

1423
01:07:43,440 --> 01:07:45,320
Speaker 1: There's no political content behind it, though.

1424
01:07:45,280 --> 01:07:47,400
Speaker 2: Is he No? Wait? Look, look, I would never vote

1425
01:07:47,400 --> 01:07:50,320
Speaker 2: for Trump, but I never vote for Biden. I believe

1426
01:07:51,200 --> 01:07:54,400
Speaker 2: that every celebrity will tell you to make sure you

1427
01:07:54,440 --> 01:07:57,120
Speaker 2: get out there and vote. That's the celebrity catchphase. After

1428
01:07:57,120 --> 01:08:01,240
Speaker 2: an election, they'll all post themselves with their sticker I voted.

1429
01:08:01,880 --> 01:08:06,200
Speaker 2: Make sure you vote. No, no, no, don't vote. We

1430
01:08:06,600 --> 01:08:09,640
Speaker 2: deserve better than this. We deserve better options than a

1431
01:08:09,680 --> 01:08:13,120
Speaker 2: fucking lunatic and a seno old man. They're both fucking

1432
01:08:13,160 --> 01:08:13,880
Speaker 2: old as well.

1433
01:08:14,080 --> 01:08:14,840
Speaker 1: We should just let.

1434
01:08:14,760 --> 01:08:17,760
Speaker 2: Those two men vote. That's it, just those two and

1435
01:08:17,800 --> 01:08:21,200
Speaker 2: they have to vote on an iPad. Whichever one can

1436
01:08:21,240 --> 01:08:23,519
Speaker 2: do it without the help from their grandchild. They get

1437
01:08:23,520 --> 01:08:25,160
Speaker 2: to run the free world. You know what I mean,

1438
01:08:26,280 --> 01:08:27,639
Speaker 2: Like we deserve more?

1439
01:08:28,640 --> 01:08:30,200
Speaker 1: What is that like? I mean, you're you live in

1440
01:08:30,200 --> 01:08:32,839
Speaker 1: the States. Why is it such a shitty choice?

1441
01:08:34,360 --> 01:08:37,439
Speaker 2: A lot of people believe that. But so Joe Biden

1442
01:08:38,120 --> 01:08:40,719
Speaker 2: for the most part, whether you agree with his policies

1443
01:08:40,800 --> 01:08:43,680
Speaker 2: or whatever, he has been a good public servant. He

1444
01:08:43,720 --> 01:08:46,439
Speaker 2: has dedicated his life and being a public servant. Whether

1445
01:08:46,479 --> 01:08:49,280
Speaker 2: you agree with him or not. Trump has had many

1446
01:08:49,320 --> 01:08:53,320
Speaker 2: different lives before he became this guy. He's been a businessman,

1447
01:08:54,080 --> 01:08:58,479
Speaker 2: a real estate guy, to the BV presenter, to the president.

1448
01:08:58,560 --> 01:09:02,000
Speaker 2: He's had like art different lives until he got to

1449
01:09:02,040 --> 01:09:06,040
Speaker 2: that thing. Biden's had one life, same life, public service,

1450
01:09:06,120 --> 01:09:09,920
Speaker 2: public service. And there's things I've liked about Joe Biden.

1451
01:09:09,960 --> 01:09:12,839
Speaker 2: I've always felt, you know, I've had tragedy in my life.

1452
01:09:13,040 --> 01:09:16,400
Speaker 2: Right He lost his wife and his five year old

1453
01:09:16,520 --> 01:09:19,200
Speaker 2: child in a car accident, you know. And he's not

1454
01:09:19,240 --> 01:09:21,400
Speaker 2: a good talker, Joe Biden. He's not a great talker.

1455
01:09:21,479 --> 01:09:24,599
Speaker 2: But whenever he talked to people who lost their children

1456
01:09:24,640 --> 01:09:26,640
Speaker 2: in an incident or something like that, even if it

1457
01:09:26,720 --> 01:09:28,599
Speaker 2: was like a school shitting or something like that, when

1458
01:09:28,640 --> 01:09:31,280
Speaker 2: he spoke from the heart, it was quite beautiful because

1459
01:09:31,560 --> 01:09:33,559
Speaker 2: you knew he'd been through it, you know what I mean.

1460
01:09:33,560 --> 01:09:36,200
Speaker 2: So I always had a soft spot for him in that,

1461
01:09:36,280 --> 01:09:38,519
Speaker 2: because you know, you can be the most powerful man

1462
01:09:38,560 --> 01:09:40,599
Speaker 2: in the world, but doesn't bring bring his child back,

1463
01:09:40,720 --> 01:09:42,840
Speaker 2: doesn't bring his child back, right, So I always had

1464
01:09:42,840 --> 01:09:46,760
Speaker 2: a soft spot for him for that. But and I

1465
01:09:46,880 --> 01:09:48,719
Speaker 2: look his policies, and I don't want to get into

1466
01:09:48,760 --> 01:09:51,080
Speaker 2: what's going on in Israel and Palestine, and I'm not

1467
01:09:51,080 --> 01:09:53,120
Speaker 2: going to get into that fucking debate. And you know

1468
01:09:53,200 --> 01:09:55,400
Speaker 2: whether I agree or not with those type of things.

1469
01:09:55,479 --> 01:09:58,200
Speaker 2: And you know, do I think he's done enough for

1470
01:09:58,840 --> 01:10:01,960
Speaker 2: certain things or I think he's covered all of his promises? No?

1471
01:10:02,120 --> 01:10:05,320
Speaker 2: Not really, right, But he could have gone out on

1472
01:10:05,360 --> 01:10:09,000
Speaker 2: the top on a high. He could have stood up

1473
01:10:09,240 --> 01:10:11,800
Speaker 2: at the Republic at the Democrat We'll see, we're all

1474
01:10:11,840 --> 01:10:14,640
Speaker 2: fluff lines, right. He could have stood up at the

1475
01:10:14,680 --> 01:10:19,040
Speaker 2: Democrat convention and handed the torch over to someone else

1476
01:10:19,479 --> 01:10:22,360
Speaker 2: and gone, thank you so much, and I'm gloud to

1477
01:10:22,360 --> 01:10:24,880
Speaker 2: be American, thank you for having me. And he would

1478
01:10:24,880 --> 01:10:27,679
Speaker 2: have been left a hero, the man who defeated Trump,

1479
01:10:28,160 --> 01:10:31,760
Speaker 2: the man who got the Democrats back in. But all

1480
01:10:31,800 --> 01:10:35,320
Speaker 2: he will be remembered for is a bitter old man

1481
01:10:35,640 --> 01:10:38,760
Speaker 2: who wouldn't give up power a petty old person, or

1482
01:10:39,120 --> 01:10:41,720
Speaker 2: do you man, hang on, but do you think I

1483
01:10:41,720 --> 01:10:43,200
Speaker 2: don't think there's a chance in hell he can no,

1484
01:10:43,320 --> 01:10:45,240
Speaker 2: But do you think he's doing it out of the

1485
01:10:45,240 --> 01:10:45,680
Speaker 2: greater good?

1486
01:10:45,720 --> 01:10:48,280
Speaker 1: And says there's no one else? He really believes his

1487
01:10:48,320 --> 01:10:49,479
Speaker 1: noels can defeat Trump.

1488
01:10:49,800 --> 01:10:51,640
Speaker 2: I think that'd be ego. There must be something so

1489
01:10:51,680 --> 01:10:55,360
Speaker 2: intoxicating about power. I don't know what it is, because

1490
01:10:55,360 --> 01:10:56,840
Speaker 2: I wouldn't want to. So what do we had? Like

1491
01:10:57,280 --> 01:11:01,720
Speaker 2: forty five forty six presidents or something? Yes, something like

1492
01:11:01,760 --> 01:11:06,360
Speaker 2: something like five of them have been killed. Yeah, that's

1493
01:11:06,360 --> 01:11:08,479
Speaker 2: not a good stat it's not a stat.

1494
01:11:08,280 --> 01:11:10,479
Speaker 1: That I was not a job.

1495
01:11:10,520 --> 01:11:13,320
Speaker 2: I'd want one and nine chance I'm going to die

1496
01:11:13,640 --> 01:11:16,040
Speaker 2: one and nine chance I'm going to be killed. And

1497
01:11:16,960 --> 01:11:22,000
Speaker 2: not only that, half the population fucking hates you. Hates you. Yeah,

1498
01:11:22,160 --> 01:11:24,920
Speaker 2: right at the end, you get paid fuck all, and

1499
01:11:24,960 --> 01:11:26,599
Speaker 2: then the rest of your life you have to have

1500
01:11:26,640 --> 01:11:28,919
Speaker 2: public servants and all that type of stuff and security

1501
01:11:28,960 --> 01:11:31,240
Speaker 2: around you all the bloody time because someone's going to

1502
01:11:31,280 --> 01:11:34,080
Speaker 2: knock you. But there must be something wonderful about it.

1503
01:11:34,360 --> 01:11:36,120
Speaker 2: Why do they all hold why do they want it?

1504
01:11:36,920 --> 01:11:40,360
Speaker 2: Why does Ruth Bader Ginsburg not give it up? Why

1505
01:11:40,400 --> 01:11:42,519
Speaker 2: does that what's the name Steinberg or whatever? That she

1506
01:11:42,600 --> 01:11:44,400
Speaker 2: was one of the things, she was buddy in her nineties,

1507
01:11:44,439 --> 01:11:48,599
Speaker 2: and she was holding onto a fucking job, right, Mitch McConnell,

1508
01:11:48,840 --> 01:11:51,559
Speaker 2: Why am I watching this? Old can't fucking not giving

1509
01:11:51,600 --> 01:11:55,439
Speaker 2: up power? They have to hold on this? I'd like,

1510
01:11:55,479 --> 01:11:58,679
Speaker 2: do you get blow jobs all the time? What happens? Well, well, yeah,

1511
01:11:58,760 --> 01:12:01,479
Speaker 2: not all the time, though maybe more. But what is

1512
01:12:01,520 --> 01:12:06,559
Speaker 2: so wonderful about this power? My theory is that the

1513
01:12:06,640 --> 01:12:12,000
Speaker 2: job only attracts psychopaths only because who else would want

1514
01:12:12,040 --> 01:12:14,559
Speaker 2: to do it? Who else would get anything out of that?

1515
01:12:14,920 --> 01:12:19,200
Speaker 2: Why would you ever? I understand getting into politics and

1516
01:12:19,280 --> 01:12:23,240
Speaker 2: maybe wanting to make a difference, but running the free world?

1517
01:12:23,760 --> 01:12:24,400
Speaker 2: Fuck that?

1518
01:12:24,640 --> 01:12:27,120
Speaker 1: Do you mean American politics? So what do you mean everywhere? Generally?

1519
01:12:27,800 --> 01:12:28,360
Speaker 1: What about here?

1520
01:12:28,439 --> 01:12:30,960
Speaker 2: I would say anywhere? I'd say anywhere you can't tell me,

1521
01:12:31,040 --> 01:12:33,439
Speaker 2: I'll go. I'll go both sides of the party right

1522
01:12:33,479 --> 01:12:36,240
Speaker 2: from my childhood right? How many times did John Howard

1523
01:12:36,320 --> 01:12:39,680
Speaker 2: keep fucking going for it, going for it, just wanting it,

1524
01:12:39,720 --> 01:12:43,360
Speaker 2: wanting it, wanting it. Paul Keating the whole time was

1525
01:12:43,360 --> 01:12:44,479
Speaker 2: sitting behind Bob.

1526
01:12:44,280 --> 01:12:45,360
Speaker 1: Hawk, just desperate.

1527
01:12:47,960 --> 01:12:50,479
Speaker 2: What did they want so desperately? What do you get

1528
01:12:50,520 --> 01:12:54,000
Speaker 2: out of it? And it's the sense of maybe going

1529
01:12:54,040 --> 01:12:56,479
Speaker 2: as high in life as you can go, going as

1530
01:12:56,520 --> 01:12:59,559
Speaker 2: far as you can go. Now I understand that maybe

1531
01:12:59,600 --> 01:13:01,840
Speaker 2: going Let's see how far I can take this life.

1532
01:13:01,920 --> 01:13:05,240
Speaker 2: Let's see how high I can go, Let's see how

1533
01:13:05,280 --> 01:13:09,960
Speaker 2: popular I can get, important I can be. But Biden

1534
01:13:10,080 --> 01:13:13,479
Speaker 2: did it. He did it, he became He was vice

1535
01:13:13,560 --> 01:13:16,880
Speaker 2: president for two terms, and he was president for a term.

1536
01:13:17,160 --> 01:13:19,080
Speaker 2: And now he's going to be remembered as this blake

1537
01:13:19,320 --> 01:13:23,439
Speaker 2: who wouldn't give up power when he was very clearly no,

1538
01:13:24,040 --> 01:13:28,240
Speaker 2: dementia is a strong word. But my brain's not as

1539
01:13:28,280 --> 01:13:32,520
Speaker 2: sharp as it was ten years ago, a bit more forgetful,

1540
01:13:32,680 --> 01:13:36,519
Speaker 2: stumble over me words, a little tiny bit fucking haighty two.

1541
01:13:36,960 --> 01:13:41,160
Speaker 2: I'm going to be fucking dribbling right. And you're like,

1542
01:13:41,280 --> 01:13:44,479
Speaker 2: you can't rule the bloody world. What's wrong with just

1543
01:13:44,520 --> 01:13:46,080
Speaker 2: sitting on your arse and watching Telly?

1544
01:13:46,120 --> 01:13:47,880
Speaker 1: But you he might be getting influenced by his wife

1545
01:13:48,040 --> 01:13:48,799
Speaker 1: the first.

1546
01:13:49,200 --> 01:13:51,479
Speaker 2: If I was his wife, especially like his son has

1547
01:13:51,520 --> 01:13:53,680
Speaker 2: been dragged through the mud for things that he did do.

1548
01:13:54,000 --> 01:13:56,680
Speaker 2: Although that's funny in it. But he gets done. He

1549
01:13:56,760 --> 01:14:00,000
Speaker 2: gets done for fucking having a gun and an inappropriate place,

1550
01:14:00,920 --> 01:14:03,080
Speaker 2: and the Republicans like got him. It's like, so you

1551
01:14:03,080 --> 01:14:07,040
Speaker 2: do agree with some gun control there, We should at

1552
01:14:07,120 --> 01:14:10,160
Speaker 2: times have some gun in control. And even with mate

1553
01:14:10,280 --> 01:14:16,000
Speaker 2: Donald Trump. You fucking why the hush money? She signed

1554
01:14:16,000 --> 01:14:19,080
Speaker 2: a contract, mate, she signed a non disclosure. Why are

1555
01:14:19,080 --> 01:14:22,120
Speaker 2: we getting into her. She's meant to be hushing, that's

1556
01:14:22,120 --> 01:14:25,360
Speaker 2: the whole thing. He didn't do anything illegal with the

1557
01:14:25,439 --> 01:14:27,680
Speaker 2: hush money. What he did was the funding of the

1558
01:14:27,720 --> 01:14:29,400
Speaker 2: money coming out of the wrong funds and that type

1559
01:14:29,400 --> 01:14:32,599
Speaker 2: of stuff. But she should have been shut up about that.

1560
01:14:32,680 --> 01:14:34,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's nothing wrong rush money because she took the

1561
01:14:34,680 --> 01:14:35,280
Speaker 1: money to be quiet.

1562
01:14:35,320 --> 01:14:37,160
Speaker 2: She took the money to be quiet. You didn't make

1563
01:14:37,200 --> 01:14:41,280
Speaker 2: her do anything. And yeah, if anything, I think for

1564
01:14:41,360 --> 01:14:43,400
Speaker 2: a man of his wealth, she gave him a very

1565
01:14:43,479 --> 01:14:46,599
Speaker 2: reasonable price. One hundred and fifty grand I think, bloody

1566
01:14:46,680 --> 01:14:47,320
Speaker 2: very reasonable.

1567
01:14:47,600 --> 01:14:49,439
Speaker 1: Now she's filthy that she could have got more.

1568
01:14:49,360 --> 01:14:51,000
Speaker 2: Well, she should have asked the bloody more.

1569
01:14:51,040 --> 01:14:54,320
Speaker 1: She should have. I guess I've just been watching and

1570
01:14:54,360 --> 01:14:56,719
Speaker 1: listening to the energy that comes out is fucking crazy.

1571
01:14:58,400 --> 01:15:02,680
Speaker 1: It's mental. I'm saying mental energy, Like really good. And

1572
01:15:02,720 --> 01:15:05,040
Speaker 1: if I just if I wind it back and I

1573
01:15:05,120 --> 01:15:07,559
Speaker 1: know that you've given up the grog and you stop drinking.

1574
01:15:08,880 --> 01:15:12,720
Speaker 1: Does Doug's alcohol, you know whatever? Does that make you

1575
01:15:12,840 --> 01:15:14,280
Speaker 1: more energeticalless energy?

1576
01:15:16,040 --> 01:15:18,200
Speaker 2: That The whole thing is like the infetamines are meant

1577
01:15:18,200 --> 01:15:20,200
Speaker 2: to calm me down with your attention, devisity disorder and

1578
01:15:20,200 --> 01:15:21,680
Speaker 2: all that type of stuff, and you meant to be

1579
01:15:21,960 --> 01:15:23,880
Speaker 2: you take them. It makes your focus and you watch

1580
01:15:23,960 --> 01:15:26,519
Speaker 2: the fucking TV and you know. But for other people

1581
01:15:26,560 --> 01:15:28,320
Speaker 2: that Trump's meant to be an adder all the whole time.

1582
01:15:29,640 --> 01:15:32,320
Speaker 2: That's why people reckon that's I can't speak for this,

1583
01:15:32,360 --> 01:15:33,840
Speaker 2: but that's where people reckon, He's on the adder.

1584
01:15:34,080 --> 01:15:34,960
Speaker 1: Big American drug.

1585
01:15:35,120 --> 01:15:39,760
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, it's but it's basically dexadrenaline. It's dexadrenas. It's

1586
01:15:39,800 --> 01:15:42,840
Speaker 2: it's trying to It's like it makes you focus and

1587
01:15:44,320 --> 01:15:46,920
Speaker 2: do exams very quickly and memorize a speech or whatever.

1588
01:15:48,000 --> 01:15:52,320
Speaker 2: I I weed came into my life very late in life,

1589
01:15:52,439 --> 01:15:55,719
Speaker 2: when I was only into uppers and not downs, and

1590
01:15:55,880 --> 01:15:58,600
Speaker 2: I've never been into painkillers or anything like that.

1591
01:15:58,880 --> 01:15:59,920
Speaker 1: We weren't smoking hot ones.

1592
01:16:00,080 --> 01:16:04,720
Speaker 2: Of that, no, no, just edibles, yep. And when it

1593
01:16:04,720 --> 01:16:07,680
Speaker 2: became legally. I only ever took legal weed. It is

1594
01:16:07,680 --> 01:16:10,640
Speaker 2: the only drug that ever took legally. And then there

1595
01:16:10,720 --> 01:16:12,800
Speaker 2: was shops and you just buy gummy bears and you

1596
01:16:12,840 --> 01:16:13,439
Speaker 2: buy this.

1597
01:16:13,360 --> 01:16:16,400
Speaker 1: And you're in California, every state, yeah California.

1598
01:16:16,479 --> 01:16:18,799
Speaker 2: But in saying that, they let you travel around America

1599
01:16:18,840 --> 01:16:21,880
Speaker 2: with it for the most but they made a press

1600
01:16:21,920 --> 01:16:25,600
Speaker 2: release from Lax Airport saying, stop trying to hide it.

1601
01:16:26,120 --> 01:16:30,120
Speaker 2: We're not looking for it. Like that's the other ends problem,

1602
01:16:30,120 --> 01:16:34,759
Speaker 2: you know what I mean. So, so I found that weed.

1603
01:16:35,760 --> 01:16:39,040
Speaker 2: I don't think I could have become a pothead if

1604
01:16:39,160 --> 01:16:42,760
Speaker 2: I was single. I needed alcohol to lubricate my confidence

1605
01:16:42,800 --> 01:16:44,880
Speaker 2: to be able to talk to women or have ay thing,

1606
01:16:45,200 --> 01:16:48,800
Speaker 2: because we weed makes me the opposite of what I

1607
01:16:48,800 --> 01:16:52,640
Speaker 2: am right now. Yeah, weed makes me sit back in

1608
01:16:52,680 --> 01:16:55,960
Speaker 2: its chair and just watch Telly with my wife and

1609
01:16:56,000 --> 01:16:59,400
Speaker 2: not be the whole whole fucking time. So weed came

1610
01:16:59,439 --> 01:17:01,679
Speaker 2: into my life and really changed things up. And then

1611
01:17:02,160 --> 01:17:04,680
Speaker 2: when I got into weed, and I'd already given up alcohol,

1612
01:17:04,720 --> 01:17:07,960
Speaker 2: and I was sort of struggling with quitting alcohol, and

1613
01:17:07,960 --> 01:17:09,920
Speaker 2: then I took up weird and I never struggled with

1614
01:17:09,960 --> 01:17:13,120
Speaker 2: the alcohol again. I don't ever want to drink again,

1615
01:17:13,439 --> 01:17:16,680
Speaker 2: I don't like what I became on alcohol, and what

1616
01:17:16,720 --> 01:17:20,080
Speaker 2: do you become like? I became a sloppy drunk. I

1617
01:17:20,160 --> 01:17:23,120
Speaker 2: became what the Americans referred to as a lush.

1618
01:17:23,160 --> 01:17:25,400
Speaker 1: But like as in what we would call a lush

1619
01:17:25,439 --> 01:17:28,080
Speaker 1: if somebody wants to go own dart and everybody, no, no.

1620
01:17:27,960 --> 01:17:28,240
Speaker 2: No no.

1621
01:17:28,360 --> 01:17:32,880
Speaker 3: I wasn't an aggressive drink where I was Yeah, yeah,

1622
01:17:32,920 --> 01:17:38,080
Speaker 3: guy drive, sloppy, sloppy, dribbling person, the guy you wouldn't

1623
01:17:38,080 --> 01:17:38,719
Speaker 3: want around.

1624
01:17:38,880 --> 01:17:43,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I was. I used to be what they

1625
01:17:43,080 --> 01:17:46,400
Speaker 2: call a very good drinker, but was I I was

1626
01:17:46,439 --> 01:17:50,840
Speaker 2: just on cocaine, so so a decade before that, I

1627
01:17:50,960 --> 01:17:53,920
Speaker 2: was this guy on stage drinking nine ten pints of

1628
01:17:53,960 --> 01:17:56,719
Speaker 2: alcohol and people people going this guy as a champion

1629
01:17:56,800 --> 01:18:00,639
Speaker 2: drinker on top of the group, on top, on top

1630
01:18:00,640 --> 01:18:03,080
Speaker 2: of the booze. The cocaine made me keep drinking. Drink

1631
01:18:03,120 --> 01:18:05,280
Speaker 2: and drink and drink and drink. And I was drunk

1632
01:18:05,320 --> 01:18:07,639
Speaker 2: in my head, but I was steady as a fucking

1633
01:18:07,760 --> 01:18:10,519
Speaker 2: die to talk to you because of the k caine,

1634
01:18:10,600 --> 01:18:12,680
Speaker 2: you know what I mean. And I don't think I

1635
01:18:12,800 --> 01:18:16,840
Speaker 2: was what you call a terrible asshole on on either

1636
01:18:16,920 --> 01:18:26,880
Speaker 2: one of those drugs, but I do believe that my

1637
01:18:26,880 --> 01:18:29,720
Speaker 2: my restraint with my tongue or saying stupid things that

1638
01:18:29,800 --> 01:18:32,320
Speaker 2: went away, you know, which is both a powerful thing

1639
01:18:32,320 --> 01:18:35,559
Speaker 2: and you lost your judgment or my judgment. My judgment

1640
01:18:35,600 --> 01:18:38,960
Speaker 2: went away. I never got into fist fights, really, I

1641
01:18:39,000 --> 01:18:41,880
Speaker 2: well I was. I think I got into one in

1642
01:18:41,920 --> 01:18:45,519
Speaker 2: Boston that I would have walked away from if I

1643
01:18:45,600 --> 01:18:49,240
Speaker 2: wasn't drunk. But to this day, I wasn't at fault

1644
01:18:49,560 --> 01:18:52,479
Speaker 2: in that fight. But a sober person would have walked away.

1645
01:18:52,680 --> 01:18:55,160
Speaker 2: But the person pushed me first, and then I went

1646
01:18:55,280 --> 01:18:57,080
Speaker 2: for him, and then you know, like that type of thing.

1647
01:18:57,160 --> 01:19:01,240
Speaker 2: So you go, well, that's not good. And you know

1648
01:19:01,400 --> 01:19:05,479
Speaker 2: I'm more argumentative or whatever. You know, I wasn't a terrible,

1649
01:19:06,000 --> 01:19:09,600
Speaker 2: nasty drunk, but but you know, you could get the

1650
01:19:09,680 --> 01:19:11,639
Speaker 2: very happy version of me as well. It's very nice,

1651
01:19:11,640 --> 01:19:14,240
Speaker 2: but I could say some nasty comments, you know, every

1652
01:19:14,240 --> 01:19:16,200
Speaker 2: now and again, I could be a bit bit more mean.

1653
01:19:16,240 --> 01:19:17,839
Speaker 1: I guess so now though.

1654
01:19:19,200 --> 01:19:21,479
Speaker 2: I just man, I just that's what I'm saying. I

1655
01:19:21,479 --> 01:19:24,240
Speaker 2: wouldn't be. I'm not high right now. I don't plan

1656
01:19:24,280 --> 01:19:26,479
Speaker 2: on getting high tonight. I'm not high every night the week,

1657
01:19:26,760 --> 01:19:28,559
Speaker 2: A couple of days a week, a couple of days

1658
01:19:28,600 --> 01:19:31,599
Speaker 2: a week. I've taken edible, I watched Man, I got

1659
01:19:31,600 --> 01:19:33,200
Speaker 2: young kids. I have to watch a lot of fucking

1660
01:19:33,200 --> 01:19:38,080
Speaker 2: Pixar movies and we does a lot of heavy lifting

1661
01:19:38,160 --> 01:19:40,960
Speaker 2: for those films. But my son is funny because I'm

1662
01:19:40,960 --> 01:19:42,920
Speaker 2: always very open with who I am and what I'm

1663
01:19:42,960 --> 01:19:45,639
Speaker 2: doing and all the type of stuff. And my wife

1664
01:19:45,800 --> 01:19:51,400
Speaker 2: my son, who is who has inherited the wonderfulness of dyslexia? Right?

1665
01:19:51,520 --> 01:19:53,800
Speaker 2: So yeah, yeah, my father hasn't, but you got it.

1666
01:19:53,840 --> 01:19:57,880
Speaker 1: You don't have him on then my son lovely boy,

1667
01:19:57,880 --> 01:20:01,200
Speaker 1: and he's very gentle like he's mother, very general, funny

1668
01:20:01,240 --> 01:20:02,040
Speaker 1: lad not to stuff.

1669
01:20:02,360 --> 01:20:05,200
Speaker 2: But I so, me and the wife were there when

1670
01:20:05,240 --> 01:20:09,720
Speaker 2: my son was I don't know seven, and he was

1671
01:20:09,720 --> 01:20:11,880
Speaker 2: still having problems spelling and all that other stuff. Seven

1672
01:20:11,960 --> 01:20:13,559
Speaker 2: is a bit old to be having these problems. You know.

1673
01:20:14,000 --> 01:20:15,759
Speaker 2: He wasn't quite getting me. He had him in tudors

1674
01:20:15,800 --> 01:20:19,320
Speaker 2: and all that stuff, and so I was. I walked

1675
01:20:19,320 --> 01:20:20,960
Speaker 2: into the room and I was, I guess I was

1676
01:20:21,080 --> 01:20:24,200
Speaker 2: being overly friendly. And my wife went to me, she goes,

1677
01:20:25,160 --> 01:20:32,400
Speaker 2: are you high, right? And I said no, right, And

1678
01:20:32,439 --> 01:20:35,519
Speaker 2: then my son goes, I can spell, you know, And

1679
01:20:35,560 --> 01:20:38,120
Speaker 2: I said, oh yeah, mate, what does high spell? And

1680
01:20:38,200 --> 01:20:44,160
Speaker 2: he went drunk and that was when I just crossed

1681
01:20:44,160 --> 01:20:47,760
Speaker 2: over to the other way. Yeah, to being high over

1682
01:20:47,880 --> 01:20:51,320
Speaker 2: over booze, you know, because it's been twelve hundred in

1683
01:20:51,400 --> 01:20:54,760
Speaker 2: something days, it's been over. It's March tenth, three years ago,

1684
01:20:54,760 --> 01:20:57,160
Speaker 2: three and a bit years ago as my last alcoholic beverage.

1685
01:20:57,360 --> 01:20:59,680
Speaker 1: And do you have to do you see people about it?

1686
01:20:59,880 --> 01:21:04,200
Speaker 2: Just I tried going to AA for a bit and

1687
01:21:04,240 --> 01:21:07,040
Speaker 2: it wasn't for me. And I appreciate that AA works

1688
01:21:07,040 --> 01:21:09,640
Speaker 2: for other people, but it didn't work for me in

1689
01:21:09,680 --> 01:21:12,760
Speaker 2: the sense that I like to pack things up and

1690
01:21:12,800 --> 01:21:16,400
Speaker 2: put them away, not like not bury them, but I

1691
01:21:16,560 --> 01:21:19,480
Speaker 2: like things to be behind me. I like my mistakes.

1692
01:21:19,720 --> 01:21:22,280
Speaker 2: I like to apologize for my mistakes and move forward,

1693
01:21:22,400 --> 01:21:23,800
Speaker 2: try not to do it again, and try not to

1694
01:21:23,880 --> 01:21:25,760
Speaker 2: do it again. That's what I like to do, you

1695
01:21:25,800 --> 01:21:29,599
Speaker 2: know what I mean. There's no point having to fucking

1696
01:21:29,760 --> 01:21:32,639
Speaker 2: constantly go to meetings and talk about how shit I.

1697
01:21:32,640 --> 01:21:34,720
Speaker 1: Was a few years ago, because you know well enough.

1698
01:21:34,800 --> 01:21:36,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know well, and that's just for me and

1699
01:21:36,320 --> 01:21:39,400
Speaker 2: other people. It really works. Yeah, And what happened was

1700
01:21:39,439 --> 01:21:44,920
Speaker 2: as well. It was during COVID and a comedian friend

1701
01:21:44,920 --> 01:21:47,360
Speaker 2: of mine. I won't mention anyone's names because it's called

1702
01:21:47,360 --> 01:21:51,880
Speaker 2: anonymous for a reason. During COVID, a friend of mine

1703
01:21:51,880 --> 01:21:55,000
Speaker 2: who's an alcoholic, I, you know, I couldn't stop drinking

1704
01:21:55,000 --> 01:21:58,559
Speaker 2: At one stage, I just couldn't stop drinking. And as

1705
01:21:58,560 --> 01:22:00,320
Speaker 2: soon as I went back out on the on the road,

1706
01:22:00,360 --> 01:22:02,160
Speaker 2: they started opening up clubs. I was just a mess.

1707
01:22:02,840 --> 01:22:07,400
Speaker 2: I'd given up other drugs so long ago. I couldn't.

1708
01:22:07,560 --> 01:22:10,400
Speaker 2: People thought I was really spiraling, but it was just

1709
01:22:10,439 --> 01:22:12,559
Speaker 2: I wasn't doing cocaine. I was just sloppy, and I

1710
01:22:12,600 --> 01:22:14,760
Speaker 2: was just stumbling and falling over out the front of

1711
01:22:14,800 --> 01:22:18,639
Speaker 2: comedy classes. Yeah, and I've never had I have no

1712
01:22:18,720 --> 01:22:21,320
Speaker 2: interest in having one beer. I don't understand one beer.

1713
01:22:21,320 --> 01:22:23,120
Speaker 2: If I'm drinking, I'm drinking. And I'm even the same

1714
01:22:23,120 --> 01:22:25,479
Speaker 2: way with food. I keep I keep my weight off

1715
01:22:25,720 --> 01:22:27,560
Speaker 2: by fasting for two days. That's the only way I

1716
01:22:27,600 --> 01:22:29,759
Speaker 2: can do it. I can. I'd bother all or nothing.

1717
01:22:30,200 --> 01:22:32,679
Speaker 2: So during my fast days, you meant to eat under

1718
01:22:32,680 --> 01:22:35,519
Speaker 2: five hundred calories, I eat nothing. I don't eating nothing today.

1719
01:22:35,560 --> 01:22:38,360
Speaker 2: I won't eat anything today because food doesn't exist. I've

1720
01:22:38,360 --> 01:22:41,280
Speaker 2: gotta remember that food doesn't fucking exist, right, That's pretty

1721
01:22:41,280 --> 01:22:41,800
Speaker 2: powerful though.

1722
01:22:41,880 --> 01:22:42,880
Speaker 1: Yeah you can eat that way.

1723
01:22:42,960 --> 01:22:45,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, So it's like I'd like to eat today,

1724
01:22:45,080 --> 01:22:48,600
Speaker 2: but sadly food doesn't exist, so I can do that

1725
01:22:48,640 --> 01:22:53,160
Speaker 2: Mondays and Wednesdays, I don't eat right and say the

1726
01:22:53,160 --> 01:22:55,280
Speaker 2: same with alcohol, if I had one beer, I was

1727
01:22:55,320 --> 01:22:58,759
Speaker 2: having until I was obliterated. That's all I cared about,

1728
01:22:58,920 --> 01:23:04,439
Speaker 2: was going until I was obliterated. And so I broke down,

1729
01:23:04,520 --> 01:23:08,760
Speaker 2: and I remember I called my manager and my agent up,

1730
01:23:08,800 --> 01:23:11,519
Speaker 2: my American manager and agent, not my strange one who's

1731
01:23:11,880 --> 01:23:16,719
Speaker 2: here in the other room. And I broke down tears,

1732
01:23:16,800 --> 01:23:18,240
Speaker 2: and they wanted me to do a gig, and I

1733
01:23:18,240 --> 01:23:20,560
Speaker 2: said I can't leave the house right now because I

1734
01:23:20,600 --> 01:23:22,880
Speaker 2: can't control it. I said, oh, I can't control it,

1735
01:23:23,600 --> 01:23:26,880
Speaker 2: and they never I never admitted to other people that

1736
01:23:26,920 --> 01:23:28,320
Speaker 2: I had a problem ever until then. I said, I

1737
01:23:28,360 --> 01:23:34,640
Speaker 2: can't control it. So I started another comedian who I

1738
01:23:34,720 --> 01:23:36,960
Speaker 2: knew was sober, but I didn't know the extent of

1739
01:23:37,000 --> 01:23:39,320
Speaker 2: how his life and what he'd been through. He'd rang

1740
01:23:39,360 --> 01:23:43,360
Speaker 2: me up, and me and him weren't great mates before this.

1741
01:23:43,400 --> 01:23:45,400
Speaker 2: We're good friends now. But he rang me up and

1742
01:23:45,439 --> 01:23:48,600
Speaker 2: he talked to me and he said, look, I have

1743
01:23:48,680 --> 01:23:54,480
Speaker 2: an aa meeting, right, And this AA meeting is just comedians,

1744
01:23:54,520 --> 01:23:58,160
Speaker 2: and there's loads of famous people in there, so don't

1745
01:23:58,200 --> 01:24:01,759
Speaker 2: worry that you're going to be you judged by people

1746
01:24:01,880 --> 01:24:05,240
Speaker 2: or whatever. And so there was comedians that I knew,

1747
01:24:05,400 --> 01:24:07,760
Speaker 2: who I never even knew was sober, and they were there,

1748
01:24:07,800 --> 01:24:10,040
Speaker 2: and they come to this meeting on zoom every day,

1749
01:24:10,280 --> 01:24:13,280
Speaker 2: every day, every day. And so I did it for

1750
01:24:13,320 --> 01:24:20,040
Speaker 2: a few weeks. And the biggest problem was that if

1751
01:24:20,080 --> 01:24:26,880
Speaker 2: you do AA, everyone shares, right. I thought about having

1752
01:24:26,880 --> 01:24:28,880
Speaker 2: a drink this week, and then I looked at the

1753
01:24:28,880 --> 01:24:31,920
Speaker 2: bottle of whiskey, and I thought to myself, No, not today,

1754
01:24:32,000 --> 01:24:36,000
Speaker 2: And I'm just grateful to be sober today and maybe

1755
01:24:36,040 --> 01:24:40,799
Speaker 2: not tomorrow, but I'm good today, and all my fucking

1756
01:24:41,000 --> 01:24:44,040
Speaker 2: the problem was it was with all with comedians. Now,

1757
01:24:44,280 --> 01:24:48,200
Speaker 2: as you've experienced on this podcast, comedians like to fucking talk.

1758
01:24:48,920 --> 01:24:53,080
Speaker 2: So everyone shared. Every single fucking meeting. There's about fifteen

1759
01:24:53,120 --> 01:24:56,400
Speaker 2: of us and they're all logging in for ten minute shares. Oh,

1760
01:24:56,840 --> 01:24:59,840
Speaker 2: he was taking up three four hours of me day

1761
01:25:00,040 --> 01:25:02,639
Speaker 2: fucking day. I don't have enough time to be sober.

1762
01:25:03,240 --> 01:25:05,439
Speaker 2: It's taken up too much of me time. So when

1763
01:25:05,479 --> 01:25:07,519
Speaker 2: a fact there was comics in there. There was one

1764
01:25:07,600 --> 01:25:09,920
Speaker 2: comic and I won't tell you who. I can tell

1765
01:25:09,960 --> 01:25:12,960
Speaker 2: you after that, there was his one comic. He hadn't

1766
01:25:13,000 --> 01:25:16,120
Speaker 2: had a drink in thirty years, and he was still

1767
01:25:16,160 --> 01:25:19,599
Speaker 2: sharing each fucking day. And I'm just like, when there's Easter,

1768
01:25:19,640 --> 01:25:22,120
Speaker 2: when there's his cat, stop sharing. He's like, it's been

1769
01:25:22,280 --> 01:25:25,880
Speaker 2: thirty years, four days and twenty six hours. We make

1770
01:25:25,960 --> 01:25:29,080
Speaker 2: it five days, right, five days and two hours and

1771
01:25:29,080 --> 01:25:32,440
Speaker 2: two hours since my last drink. And I walked past

1772
01:25:33,000 --> 01:25:37,719
Speaker 2: a restaurant I used to drink in there, but not today,

1773
01:25:37,960 --> 01:25:39,920
Speaker 2: you know what I mean. I'm just like, the longer

1774
01:25:39,960 --> 01:25:43,479
Speaker 2: you're sober, the less sharing we need, the less share.

1775
01:25:43,720 --> 01:25:46,479
Speaker 2: Like if a guy just gets sober last week because

1776
01:25:46,520 --> 01:25:49,439
Speaker 2: he's fucking yelled at his wife or been abusive to

1777
01:25:49,479 --> 01:25:53,160
Speaker 2: his kids or whatever's fucking he's lost his job, let's

1778
01:25:53,160 --> 01:25:53,960
Speaker 2: see it from that count.

1779
01:25:54,040 --> 01:25:54,639
Speaker 1: Tell me something.

1780
01:25:54,720 --> 01:25:56,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, that comes so that can's got a new fresh

1781
01:25:56,840 --> 01:25:59,120
Speaker 2: story to tell me. I don't want to hear about

1782
01:25:59,120 --> 01:26:01,600
Speaker 2: you having problems. Is that the eighty four Olympics or

1783
01:26:01,640 --> 01:26:02,880
Speaker 2: some shit fuck off?

1784
01:26:04,680 --> 01:26:07,240
Speaker 1: Can I just quickly talk before I go? And they

1785
01:26:07,320 --> 01:26:09,000
Speaker 1: get wound upbout one hundred times ever it, But I

1786
01:26:09,040 --> 01:26:11,200
Speaker 1: just want to talk quickly about the Channel seven ship. Sure,

1787
01:26:11,280 --> 01:26:15,160
Speaker 1: one second, one yeah, So obviously you live in America.

1788
01:26:15,240 --> 01:26:17,479
Speaker 1: Soon I hear everybody's watching it every day. They're probably thinking,

1789
01:26:17,560 --> 01:26:20,040
Speaker 1: you just did it yesterday afternoon. How do you? How

1790
01:26:20,040 --> 01:26:21,519
Speaker 1: do you do that show? On how and how many?

1791
01:26:23,000 --> 01:26:25,040
Speaker 2: There's a big debate down at Channel seven right now

1792
01:26:25,040 --> 01:26:27,599
Speaker 2: whether I keep my mustache on it, because I've shown

1793
01:26:27,680 --> 01:26:29,680
Speaker 2: up just with a bit of facial hair, and I

1794
01:26:29,760 --> 01:26:31,800
Speaker 2: look I think I look like Ianterpy. You know, there's

1795
01:26:31,840 --> 01:26:35,840
Speaker 2: a rich history. There's a rich, rich history of game

1796
01:26:35,880 --> 01:26:37,320
Speaker 2: show with mustaches.

1797
01:26:37,400 --> 01:26:37,519
Speaker 1: Yea.

1798
01:26:37,960 --> 01:26:40,519
Speaker 2: So what we do is we record ten episodes over

1799
01:26:40,560 --> 01:26:43,759
Speaker 2: two weeks, one episode a day, you know, Monday to Friday,

1800
01:26:43,760 --> 01:26:45,920
Speaker 2: and we record the episodes and then there's one week

1801
01:26:46,120 --> 01:26:49,679
Speaker 2: of prep work where we write like the little intros

1802
01:26:49,720 --> 01:26:52,360
Speaker 2: and outros and the little joke Like people always get

1803
01:26:52,400 --> 01:26:54,880
Speaker 2: angry that I talk over the thirty seconds while you're

1804
01:26:54,880 --> 01:26:57,320
Speaker 2: trying to think of your answer. I have to do that.

1805
01:26:57,720 --> 01:27:00,240
Speaker 2: I can't not talk. There can't be dead air. That's

1806
01:27:00,280 --> 01:27:01,920
Speaker 2: part of my contract that I have to do it.

1807
01:27:01,960 --> 01:27:06,799
Speaker 2: So I apologize. I'm not trying to annoy you, but

1808
01:27:06,800 --> 01:27:09,840
Speaker 2: but so I really. It was one of those things

1809
01:27:09,840 --> 01:27:13,639
Speaker 2: that it's like I'd done a bit acting and I'd

1810
01:27:13,640 --> 01:27:17,800
Speaker 2: done I've done sitcoms, and I've done I've done, you know,

1811
01:27:18,479 --> 01:27:22,000
Speaker 2: panel shows where I was talking directly down camera. And

1812
01:27:22,160 --> 01:27:24,439
Speaker 2: here's the thing. I'm a big game show fan.

1813
01:27:24,720 --> 01:27:25,240
Speaker 1: Oh really?

1814
01:27:25,439 --> 01:27:28,920
Speaker 2: Yeah? So I in my in my spare time, I

1815
01:27:28,960 --> 01:27:34,880
Speaker 2: watch Jeopardy every day. I like distractions and game shows

1816
01:27:34,880 --> 01:27:37,920
Speaker 2: that where I have to be engaged. I'm answering, I'm

1817
01:27:37,920 --> 01:27:39,360
Speaker 2: not going to check my phone because I've got to

1818
01:27:39,360 --> 01:27:40,720
Speaker 2: get to the next thing. Can I do the thing

1819
01:27:40,720 --> 01:27:43,720
Speaker 2: and another thing with the with the energy that I

1820
01:27:43,760 --> 01:27:47,320
Speaker 2: have in life, I find that to be something that

1821
01:27:47,360 --> 01:27:49,439
Speaker 2: I find very calming. And I've liked game shows my

1822
01:27:49,520 --> 01:27:51,880
Speaker 2: whole life. Do I think that I could have ever

1823
01:27:51,920 --> 01:27:52,840
Speaker 2: been a game show host?

1824
01:27:52,880 --> 01:27:52,920
Speaker 3: No?

1825
01:27:53,000 --> 01:27:55,400
Speaker 2: I never I never ever thought that anyone would.

1826
01:27:55,560 --> 01:27:57,160
Speaker 1: That was the approach made like it had it a

1827
01:27:57,240 --> 01:27:57,960
Speaker 1: work like you.

1828
01:27:58,040 --> 01:28:00,800
Speaker 2: Can't what did it feels It's like a dream. I

1829
01:28:00,800 --> 01:28:04,479
Speaker 2: can't remember what happened. I remember I remember my manager

1830
01:28:04,520 --> 01:28:06,759
Speaker 2: ringing me up and gate there's a new game show.

1831
01:28:07,640 --> 01:28:10,120
Speaker 2: I know what happened was when I was out here

1832
01:28:10,320 --> 01:28:13,720
Speaker 2: during COVID there there was I fuck it I think

1833
01:28:13,760 --> 01:28:16,160
Speaker 2: I'll just tell this right. I went and did a

1834
01:28:16,200 --> 01:28:20,360
Speaker 2: pilot for I won't say what channel, but they were

1835
01:28:20,360 --> 01:28:22,200
Speaker 2: thinking about bringing blankety Blanks back.

1836
01:28:22,400 --> 01:28:23,360
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I love it.

1837
01:28:23,400 --> 01:28:25,599
Speaker 2: And I was like, yeah, I'll give that a crack, right,

1838
01:28:25,640 --> 01:28:29,280
Speaker 2: and then Kennedy Yeah, And the pilot went really good.

1839
01:28:29,439 --> 01:28:32,160
Speaker 2: And that's straight up comedy. That's straight up talking to

1840
01:28:32,200 --> 01:28:35,559
Speaker 2: other comedians, not a game show, straight up comedy. And

1841
01:28:35,600 --> 01:28:38,519
Speaker 2: then the networked undern Art and you know, we went

1842
01:28:38,600 --> 01:28:42,160
Speaker 2: back and forth and you know, and they didn't come

1843
01:28:42,200 --> 01:28:44,720
Speaker 2: back with an answer very quickly. And then I think

1844
01:28:44,760 --> 01:28:47,200
Speaker 2: someone else found out that that pilot went quite well,

1845
01:28:47,479 --> 01:28:49,000
Speaker 2: and they said, oh, there's a new game show that

1846
01:28:49,080 --> 01:28:51,360
Speaker 2: needs a comedian hosting it, not a regular game show host,

1847
01:28:51,360 --> 01:28:55,400
Speaker 2: because there's got to be crowd work involved. And I'm

1848
01:28:55,479 --> 01:29:01,679
Speaker 2: so bad at reading that as in script, just reading right.

1849
01:29:02,000 --> 01:29:05,200
Speaker 2: I couldn't do the chase if I had to have

1850
01:29:05,240 --> 01:29:07,840
Speaker 2: a speed round where I had to go, all right,

1851
01:29:07,880 --> 01:29:10,280
Speaker 2: you have thirty seconds of the clock. Let's start now,

1852
01:29:10,600 --> 01:29:14,160
Speaker 2: which horse was at pass? You know I've been telling

1853
01:29:14,200 --> 01:29:18,760
Speaker 2: me questions, Yeah, they never get an answer out. You've

1854
01:29:18,760 --> 01:29:20,639
Speaker 2: won one thousand dollars. I read one.

1855
01:29:20,560 --> 01:29:21,920
Speaker 1: Question Larry be happy about that.

1856
01:29:22,400 --> 01:29:25,439
Speaker 2: Larry's all right, Larry, Larry's funny. Larry and me talk

1857
01:29:25,479 --> 01:29:27,479
Speaker 2: online every now and again. I've done the morning show

1858
01:29:27,520 --> 01:29:30,360
Speaker 2: and then Larry. Sometimes people talk to me a bit more.

1859
01:29:30,360 --> 01:29:32,040
Speaker 2: They're a bit more sweary when they talk to me

1860
01:29:32,080 --> 01:29:34,439
Speaker 2: because they think that's what I'm into, you know what

1861
01:29:34,439 --> 01:29:36,680
Speaker 2: I mean. And I said to Larry if he ever

1862
01:29:36,720 --> 01:29:39,120
Speaker 2: wants tickets to the show, and he wrote to me

1863
01:29:39,160 --> 01:29:41,760
Speaker 2: and it started off with this, hey fucker could I

1864
01:29:41,800 --> 01:29:47,120
Speaker 2: get Larry? Larry him started the message with hey fucker?

1865
01:29:48,479 --> 01:29:51,679
Speaker 2: And I was like, Larry, oh my, I was touching

1866
01:29:51,720 --> 01:29:57,320
Speaker 2: my purls as I read it anyway, So so I

1867
01:29:57,360 --> 01:29:59,800
Speaker 2: couldn't do anything. So they said, okay, I would have

1868
01:29:59,800 --> 01:30:02,080
Speaker 2: been a good host of is It Cake? You know

1869
01:30:02,200 --> 01:30:05,120
Speaker 2: that's the bittop, but one question, deal or nodeal? I

1870
01:30:05,160 --> 01:30:08,880
Speaker 2: could do deal or nodeal all day. One question. But

1871
01:30:09,800 --> 01:30:12,519
Speaker 2: they said, look, it's only I think it's thirteen thirteen

1872
01:30:12,600 --> 01:30:17,160
Speaker 2: questions over forty five minutes, and so I can somewhat

1873
01:30:18,080 --> 01:30:20,600
Speaker 2: practice them before I go out there. I know the

1874
01:30:20,640 --> 01:30:23,040
Speaker 2: thirteen questions before I walk out there. So the one

1875
01:30:23,080 --> 01:30:25,479
Speaker 2: percent clubs a good quiz for me because I can

1876
01:30:25,680 --> 01:30:30,439
Speaker 2: just go Okay, half the questions are what letters are

1877
01:30:30,479 --> 01:30:33,040
Speaker 2: next in this sequence? I love that with those ones,

1878
01:30:33,080 --> 01:30:35,479
Speaker 2: what letters are next to this sequence? But then there's

1879
01:30:35,600 --> 01:30:38,200
Speaker 2: the other ones. If Bob has four pennies and Sam

1880
01:30:38,280 --> 01:30:41,760
Speaker 2: has twelve cents and she has all the pennies, and like,

1881
01:30:42,320 --> 01:30:44,479
Speaker 2: I think you can hear the panic in my voice

1882
01:30:44,600 --> 01:30:47,160
Speaker 2: as I read those ones out. I go into like,

1883
01:30:47,520 --> 01:30:50,000
Speaker 2: I go into shock. I'm just like I'm gripping the

1884
01:30:50,640 --> 01:30:55,160
Speaker 2: lecter and just it's a big one. But luckily me,

1885
01:30:55,640 --> 01:30:59,360
Speaker 2: like the One Percent Club is arguably the only quiz

1886
01:30:59,400 --> 01:31:03,280
Speaker 2: where you could do it without a host. It would

1887
01:31:03,280 --> 01:31:06,360
Speaker 2: be boring. But the questions are up on the screen.

1888
01:31:06,640 --> 01:31:09,760
Speaker 2: They've got the iPads, they've got the questions on their iPads.

1889
01:31:10,200 --> 01:31:14,960
Speaker 2: My read doesn't really affect how they're going to answer it,

1890
01:31:15,280 --> 01:31:17,080
Speaker 2: you know what I mean, until we get our first

1891
01:31:17,120 --> 01:31:20,560
Speaker 2: blind contestant, and that person's going to fuck me. I'm

1892
01:31:20,560 --> 01:31:22,720
Speaker 2: going to have to get beautiful reads for them, you know,

1893
01:31:22,840 --> 01:31:24,360
Speaker 2: with their fucking braille iPads.

1894
01:31:24,439 --> 01:31:27,160
Speaker 1: Or because I've had the case, I've turned it on

1895
01:31:27,200 --> 01:31:30,640
Speaker 1: and I thought, fuck, you're so out of context for me.

1896
01:31:31,160 --> 01:31:32,800
Speaker 1: He just freaks me out, Like I think you don't

1897
01:31:32,800 --> 01:31:33,760
Speaker 1: even look like the same guy.

1898
01:31:33,960 --> 01:31:36,080
Speaker 2: Well, I like I like game shows. But as I said,

1899
01:31:36,080 --> 01:31:38,120
Speaker 2: there's seven and there's a big debate going around the

1900
01:31:38,120 --> 01:31:40,040
Speaker 2: building whether I keep the tash or not. Because we

1901
01:31:40,080 --> 01:31:44,519
Speaker 2: start filming on Friday, right, so we start, we start

1902
01:31:44,560 --> 01:31:47,040
Speaker 2: filming in four days. Do I keep the tash doing?

1903
01:31:47,760 --> 01:31:49,519
Speaker 1: I'm a vote for the tash keep well?

1904
01:31:49,680 --> 01:31:52,000
Speaker 2: I reckon, I force their hand. I reckon. I walk

1905
01:31:52,080 --> 01:31:53,960
Speaker 2: up with a Hitler mustache and see what they say.

1906
01:31:53,960 --> 01:31:57,599
Speaker 2: I'm going to shave it down to the square. Shave

1907
01:31:57,600 --> 01:31:59,080
Speaker 2: it down to the square, push it in of hair

1908
01:31:59,120 --> 01:32:01,920
Speaker 2: nout viral question.

1909
01:32:03,040 --> 01:32:04,960
Speaker 1: You are going to return to our shores? You've mentioned

1910
01:32:04,960 --> 01:32:07,519
Speaker 1: something earlier on but like, is it like a dream

1911
01:32:07,560 --> 01:32:09,560
Speaker 1: of yours? You when to come back? You know, to

1912
01:32:09,600 --> 01:32:11,439
Speaker 1: do a Paul Hog and buy a place in Barron Bay,

1913
01:32:11,880 --> 01:32:12,040
Speaker 1: you know.

1914
01:32:12,200 --> 01:32:17,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, I believe I'm i America was nice enough to

1915
01:32:17,800 --> 01:32:19,920
Speaker 2: make me a citizen. So I'm a proud American. I

1916
01:32:20,000 --> 01:32:20,479
Speaker 2: really am.

1917
01:32:20,800 --> 01:32:22,880
Speaker 1: But you still got straight citizen, you got dual citizenship.

1918
01:32:22,960 --> 01:32:26,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I'm Australian. Yep, I was born here. I

1919
01:32:27,040 --> 01:32:28,680
Speaker 2: left this country when I was twenty years old and

1920
01:32:28,680 --> 01:32:31,519
Speaker 2: I'm twenty seven now and I haven't lived here since

1921
01:32:32,280 --> 01:32:35,120
Speaker 2: I was twenty two when I left. No, hang on,

1922
01:32:35,200 --> 01:32:37,360
Speaker 2: what was those I know when I left. I got

1923
01:32:37,360 --> 01:32:40,799
Speaker 2: on a plane two thousand and one, September twelfth.

1924
01:32:40,920 --> 01:32:41,840
Speaker 1: It's twenty three easier.

1925
01:32:41,920 --> 01:32:44,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, the Twin Towers were footballing as I was packing

1926
01:32:44,360 --> 01:32:47,679
Speaker 2: my bag. Wow. So yeah, it's twenty four, I guess,

1927
01:32:47,760 --> 01:32:52,080
Speaker 2: or something like that. So I haven't lived back here since.

1928
01:32:53,160 --> 01:32:58,519
Speaker 2: But like the great Peter Allen once said, I'd love

1929
01:32:58,560 --> 01:32:59,280
Speaker 2: to suck your cock.

1930
01:32:59,400 --> 01:33:03,639
Speaker 1: Now, he probably would have said that God, bless your soul.

1931
01:33:03,960 --> 01:33:07,000
Speaker 2: Bless you sow. No, like you once said, don't put

1932
01:33:07,000 --> 01:33:08,680
Speaker 2: a condom on. I don't think I have it. No,

1933
01:33:08,760 --> 01:33:13,599
Speaker 2: I don't so like. I still call Australia home. I

1934
01:33:13,640 --> 01:33:21,080
Speaker 2: really do. I'm a staunch defender of Australia, and I

1935
01:33:21,439 --> 01:33:26,519
Speaker 2: sometimes it might seem like I'm criticizing Australia when I'm

1936
01:33:26,960 --> 01:33:29,120
Speaker 2: joke about it overseas or something like that. There's things

1937
01:33:29,120 --> 01:33:32,280
Speaker 2: about Australia I don't like. You know, there's things that, Okay,

1938
01:33:32,520 --> 01:33:35,320
Speaker 2: I'll tell you the things I do. Like fucking we

1939
01:33:35,439 --> 01:33:37,600
Speaker 2: have the best food in the world. Oh fuck you,

1940
01:33:37,840 --> 01:33:42,880
Speaker 2: nowhere else is fucking closely right. We don't know how

1941
01:33:42,920 --> 01:33:45,040
Speaker 2: good we have it. I'm not just talking about restaurants.

1942
01:33:45,120 --> 01:33:49,840
Speaker 2: I'm talking about bread. Fucking a loaf of coffee, bread,

1943
01:33:50,040 --> 01:33:53,880
Speaker 2: the best coffee, the best bread, the best produce. Everything.

1944
01:33:53,880 --> 01:33:56,280
Speaker 2: You go to a cafe, it's going to be good.

1945
01:33:56,600 --> 01:33:59,960
Speaker 2: It's got a bacon egg sandwich, it's gonna be good.

1946
01:34:00,080 --> 01:34:03,080
Speaker 2: In America, I can find you good places, but a

1947
01:34:03,120 --> 01:34:05,559
Speaker 2: lot of it's shit filled with sugar and additives and

1948
01:34:05,600 --> 01:34:08,800
Speaker 2: this and that, and so just go like I've got

1949
01:34:08,800 --> 01:34:11,040
Speaker 2: a bag of fucking a box of Gay Times in

1950
01:34:11,040 --> 01:34:13,960
Speaker 2: my freezer. I fucking smash through those cuts in one

1951
01:34:14,000 --> 01:34:17,320
Speaker 2: fucking day. I love that shit. Right, there's things I missed.

1952
01:34:17,760 --> 01:34:21,160
Speaker 2: Gay Times and bloody they don't have anything that good.

1953
01:34:21,360 --> 01:34:23,720
Speaker 2: I missed a good meat. But I've actually become a

1954
01:34:23,760 --> 01:34:26,599
Speaker 2: master sausage roll maker because I couldn't buy them, so

1955
01:34:26,640 --> 01:34:28,960
Speaker 2: I make them at home for myself. My sausage ol

1956
01:34:29,000 --> 01:34:32,280
Speaker 2: is the top. Kids they like them, well, my son

1957
01:34:32,360 --> 01:34:35,160
Speaker 2: doesn't mind them. I got to win people. My wife vegan.

1958
01:34:35,200 --> 01:34:37,840
Speaker 2: It's a whole thing. But I'm going to make a

1959
01:34:37,920 --> 01:34:40,240
Speaker 2: vegan sausage owl as well. And if I'm feeling nice,

1960
01:34:41,439 --> 01:34:44,720
Speaker 2: best food in the world. But you know, look how

1961
01:34:44,760 --> 01:34:49,360
Speaker 2: pale I am. Yeah, I got burnt as a kid

1962
01:34:49,439 --> 01:34:52,840
Speaker 2: so badly. I was hospitalized ones blisters on me fucking face, right,

1963
01:34:53,000 --> 01:34:55,720
Speaker 2: I don't get that with the other os and I

1964
01:34:55,800 --> 01:34:58,200
Speaker 2: hate but now sunscreen is a kid used to be

1965
01:34:59,080 --> 01:35:02,360
Speaker 2: Yeah in this now it's just a sh My wife

1966
01:35:02,360 --> 01:35:04,479
Speaker 2: doesn't do that. She says it's cancerous. I'm like, giv

1967
01:35:04,560 --> 01:35:08,240
Speaker 2: me fucking cancer because this is the best invention I've

1968
01:35:08,240 --> 01:35:10,880
Speaker 2: ever had, right, no hat, no play or that type

1969
01:35:10,880 --> 01:35:13,479
Speaker 2: of bullshit. It was hard, you know, Australian sun and

1970
01:35:13,479 --> 01:35:16,519
Speaker 2: all that type of stuff. And also there is a

1971
01:35:16,520 --> 01:35:18,880
Speaker 2: little bit of nanny state about Australia that we sort

1972
01:35:18,920 --> 01:35:22,720
Speaker 2: of don't know about us, right, Like they're lowering the

1973
01:35:22,760 --> 01:35:24,960
Speaker 2: speed limit in most places in Sydney down to forty

1974
01:35:25,000 --> 01:35:25,720
Speaker 2: kilometers an hour.

1975
01:35:25,880 --> 01:35:28,719
Speaker 1: That's a fucking ridiculous's all about thirty. Yeah, in the city.

1976
01:35:28,560 --> 01:35:32,040
Speaker 2: Especially, that'sicous. You can't get your car out of third gear, right,

1977
01:35:32,120 --> 01:35:34,360
Speaker 2: and then they always put it on us. If it

1978
01:35:34,520 --> 01:35:36,320
Speaker 2: saves just one.

1979
01:35:36,280 --> 01:35:39,519
Speaker 1: Life, I actually heard I actually heard someone say that

1980
01:35:39,640 --> 01:35:41,120
Speaker 1: from the city council the other day. But that's a

1981
01:35:41,120 --> 01:35:42,959
Speaker 1: load of on the radio, it's a load of bullshit,

1982
01:35:43,280 --> 01:35:45,320
Speaker 1: he said. If it says one life, Yeah.

1983
01:35:45,080 --> 01:35:49,240
Speaker 2: It's not saving any lives. The sixty speed limit wasn't

1984
01:35:49,240 --> 01:35:51,599
Speaker 2: the thing that was killing people. It was the cunts

1985
01:35:51,640 --> 01:35:54,280
Speaker 2: driving at one hundred that was killing the people. It

1986
01:35:54,360 --> 01:35:57,200
Speaker 2: was the people not doing the actual speed limit was

1987
01:35:57,240 --> 01:36:01,000
Speaker 2: the reason people were dying. Forty You can fucking walk

1988
01:36:01,040 --> 01:36:04,880
Speaker 2: faster than thirty, right, This is ridiculous. You've been ridiculous.

1989
01:36:04,920 --> 01:36:08,559
Speaker 2: And I can't imagine how many speed cameras I've driven

1990
01:36:08,640 --> 01:36:12,200
Speaker 2: past to get here, and they always put it on us.

1991
01:36:12,600 --> 01:36:15,600
Speaker 2: If it saves one life, fuck off, you're doing it

1992
01:36:15,640 --> 01:36:18,840
Speaker 2: for revenue. Don't fucking lie to us. You're doing it

1993
01:36:18,840 --> 01:36:21,200
Speaker 2: for the fact. So there's certain things like that where

1994
01:36:21,240 --> 01:36:23,519
Speaker 2: I find America is a little you know what else America.

1995
01:36:23,600 --> 01:36:26,360
Speaker 2: The greatest thing about America and it will be turning

1996
01:36:26,439 --> 01:36:29,360
Speaker 2: left on I think turning right on a red getting

1997
01:36:29,400 --> 01:36:31,479
Speaker 2: to a red light and seeing no one going this

1998
01:36:31,520 --> 01:36:33,880
Speaker 2: direction this way, it's just the giveaway sign. You stop,

1999
01:36:33,960 --> 01:36:37,599
Speaker 2: and then you that changes your whole day, That puts

2000
01:36:37,600 --> 01:36:41,280
Speaker 2: a spring in your step. Sensible, bring that sensible. So

2001
01:36:41,360 --> 01:36:43,360
Speaker 2: there's a few things like that, like we're the only

2002
01:36:43,400 --> 01:36:46,559
Speaker 2: country in the world that Buddy lists a death toll

2003
01:36:46,600 --> 01:36:49,120
Speaker 2: over Easter. Every time I turn on the news. I've

2004
01:36:49,120 --> 01:36:51,479
Speaker 2: got to hear who died in Tasmania and who died

2005
01:36:51,560 --> 01:36:56,240
Speaker 2: in Queensland. But it's fucking morbid. Right, there's things in Ala,

2006
01:36:56,680 --> 01:36:59,559
Speaker 2: but the bread's better, the people are the fucking best.

2007
01:37:00,680 --> 01:37:04,320
Speaker 2: Our beaches are second to none, right, and just the food.

2008
01:37:04,760 --> 01:37:08,200
Speaker 2: And I noticed, like my son who's eleven, He's like,

2009
01:37:08,479 --> 01:37:11,519
Speaker 2: I want to be Australian dad, really, but there's things,

2010
01:37:11,880 --> 01:37:14,080
Speaker 2: you know. I want to move to Perth one day

2011
01:37:14,600 --> 01:37:17,759
Speaker 2: and fucking each weekend I go see the Perth Bears.

2012
01:37:17,880 --> 01:37:18,679
Speaker 1: That's what's gonna say.

2013
01:37:18,800 --> 01:37:22,160
Speaker 2: I go see the Perth Bears, right, fucking that would

2014
01:37:22,160 --> 01:37:24,360
Speaker 2: be heaven. That would be wonderful, you know what I mean?

2015
01:37:24,880 --> 01:37:29,240
Speaker 2: I would deeply miss the Dodgers and watching baseball every day.

2016
01:37:29,680 --> 01:37:32,680
Speaker 2: Baseball's a wonderful sport. And did you hear today? You

2017
01:37:32,800 --> 01:37:36,479
Speaker 2: here today? What happened today? Something historical happened today and

2018
01:37:36,479 --> 01:37:39,320
Speaker 2: it hardly made the news? What was it? Okay? So

2019
01:37:39,320 --> 01:37:43,519
Speaker 2: Australia's had about ten to fifteen baseball players play Major

2020
01:37:43,600 --> 01:37:47,559
Speaker 2: League Baseball and they've all been relief pitchers. We've never

2021
01:37:47,600 --> 01:37:50,320
Speaker 2: had someone smash the cut out of a fucking ball

2022
01:37:50,320 --> 01:37:54,400
Speaker 2: over the fucking fence. Until today. Today, the draft happened

2023
01:37:54,479 --> 01:37:57,920
Speaker 2: and the number one pick was Travis Bazana from Oregon

2024
01:37:58,040 --> 01:38:00,599
Speaker 2: State who went to the Cleveland in or the Cleveland

2025
01:38:00,640 --> 01:38:02,800
Speaker 2: Guardians as it is now, right, he went to the

2026
01:38:02,800 --> 01:38:06,439
Speaker 2: Cleveland Right number one pick. He's a hitter. And the

2027
01:38:06,479 --> 01:38:10,479
Speaker 2: boy was born in Hornsby Hospital, went to Taramara High

2028
01:38:10,880 --> 01:38:13,760
Speaker 2: just up the bloody raid from me right as a

2029
01:38:13,840 --> 01:38:17,040
Speaker 2: kid and he played for the Kring Guy Bears or

2030
01:38:17,080 --> 01:38:22,240
Speaker 2: something as a kid. Right, how is this jewel has

2031
01:38:22,320 --> 01:38:25,120
Speaker 2: come out of the rough? Like there's no batting cages,

2032
01:38:25,200 --> 01:38:27,720
Speaker 2: there's no coaches, there's no one throwing at him as

2033
01:38:27,760 --> 01:38:31,880
Speaker 2: a kid with Mike. My son plays Little League. Half

2034
01:38:31,920 --> 01:38:34,600
Speaker 2: the kids are getting professional training every bloody day. My

2035
01:38:35,160 --> 01:38:38,560
Speaker 2: kid's school has baseball coaches that are just there to

2036
01:38:38,720 --> 01:38:39,600
Speaker 2: coach baseball.

2037
01:38:39,840 --> 01:38:42,120
Speaker 1: Right in, This kid from Kring Guy, this kid from.

2038
01:38:42,080 --> 01:38:45,080
Speaker 2: Kring Guy is not only in the draft, but he's

2039
01:38:45,240 --> 01:38:48,000
Speaker 2: number one. So you hear here, first, we're going to

2040
01:38:48,040 --> 01:38:51,400
Speaker 2: have a young man called Travis Bazana who's going to

2041
01:38:51,439 --> 01:38:54,639
Speaker 2: be the highest paid Australian athlete in a team sport

2042
01:38:54,680 --> 01:38:57,439
Speaker 2: that has ever been and it hardly made the bloody news.

2043
01:38:57,840 --> 01:39:00,960
Speaker 2: Get on board, Jim Jefferies in me m