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Speaker 1: Welcome to the heart of it. We record on gadigal

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Speaker 1: Land and it's great to have you with us.

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Speaker 2: Hi, honey, Hey, that was very smooth air fem then,

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Speaker 2: oh yeah, very smooth.

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Speaker 3: It was good.

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Speaker 2: It's good, it's good.

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Speaker 3: I liked it. I liked it.

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Speaker 4: I was just trying to keep things clipped.

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Speaker 1: Well, that's your information, it's your job, so your job.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally. Well, speaking of a job of

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Speaker 2: jobs and smooth air FM and even bigger Nova Podcasts entertainment.

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Speaker 3: Here we go.

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Speaker 1: Well, joining us today is a couple who share studio

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Speaker 1: space with us.

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Speaker 2: Correct, yes, younger couple. It's like I was gonna say,

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Speaker 2: it's like, it's not really the younger version of us,

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Speaker 2: but it's but it's they do talk about their relationship

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Speaker 2: and their you know, experiences that they go day day

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Speaker 2: to day. It's a podcast called Mad about You with

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Speaker 2: jar Da and Lockey and we've just had a fantastic

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Speaker 2: chat with them, so delightful.

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Speaker 1: So I don't know if you've listened too Mad about You.

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Speaker 1: They basically pull back the curtain, giving listeners a glimpse

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Speaker 1: into life on the other side of social media.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, because that's where they were discovered.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and they mentioned all about that.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, the trials and tribulations have been newlywed's business owners

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Speaker 1: and now parents in the public eye.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, they've got a lot to say about what that's like.

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Speaker 2: And also you know, navigating all of that for the

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Speaker 2: two of them and within their relationship. But we kind

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Speaker 2: of learn a lot about their younger days as well.

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Speaker 2: And you know, Jarde's from a Turkish family and Locke's

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Speaker 2: actually from a Polish family, so and how those two

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Speaker 2: were melded.

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Speaker 1: Let us see if there's an amalgamation of parogis and

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Speaker 1: Turkish delight. There you go, there you go.

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Speaker 2: Love it, There you go.

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Speaker 5: Check this chat out.

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Speaker 1: Welcome Jay Day and and Lockey to the heart of it.

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Speaker 1: I had to look over your shoulder then, Locke to

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Speaker 1: realize what the name of our podcast. Oh dear, I

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Speaker 1: really did.

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Speaker 5: That's just something you think about it.

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Speaker 2: But we had the tired morning for you, honey.

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Speaker 1: It's been nights, late, late nights for me at the

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Speaker 1: moment doing something new.

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Speaker 4: So my brain is like, what is it.

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Speaker 1: I'm working with the Sydney Theater Company doing a new

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Speaker 1: play with them, and yeah, it's eight shows a week

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Speaker 1: and it's quite Wow, it's intense congrasts.

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Speaker 4: Thank you.

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Speaker 3: We just went to the theater last night.

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Speaker 1: Actually, did you what you say?

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Speaker 5: It was our first night away from our son where

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Speaker 5: we let didn't let sorry that's the wrong word, but

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Speaker 5: we got someone to put him down, which we hadn't done.

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Speaker 4: Actually, going is still going wrong?

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Speaker 1: You put him down?

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Speaker 5: So yeah, we we drugged his dinner just so he'd sleep. No,

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Speaker 5: we know he was. He's been a tough sleeper. And

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Speaker 5: it was the first night where we sort of, I guess,

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Speaker 5: let someone else sort of do his nighttime routine and

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Speaker 5: put him down and it was a success, And yeah,

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Speaker 5: it was. It was nice to have our first night

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Speaker 5: out in like thirteen and a half months as a couple.

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Speaker 6: Are excellent it It was the second time we've gone,

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Speaker 6: but for some reason, neither of us could could remember

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Speaker 6: it so much.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, well there was so much and.

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Speaker 5: Key songs you remember when they come up? Yeah, I

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Speaker 5: remember that, but yeah, I forgot the gist of it.

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Speaker 5: I knew it was taking the piece.

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Speaker 2: How much of the night did you end up talking

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Speaker 2: about your son? Though?

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Speaker 3: Actually not much.

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Speaker 6: I think we both kind of Yeah, we were with

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Speaker 6: family as well, so his family we went with, so

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Speaker 6: we were a bit wrapped up.

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Speaker 5: We did a few monitor checks. When you check the

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Speaker 5: monitor and he's sleeping, you don't have to really worry.

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Speaker 4: That's all video now too.

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Speaker 6: It's all modern and you can check it wherever you are.

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Speaker 6: You can check it across the world.

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Speaker 2: Yeahz our Son has one for his puppy. Oh so

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Speaker 2: he looks, he looks checks to see what she's up to. Puppycam.

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Speaker 6: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I actually order for him because he was saying,

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Speaker 2: it's what I need for Christmas.

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Speaker 3: Mum.

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Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, that's cute. It is very cute. Back

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Speaker 2: back in our day, honey, you just walked out that

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Speaker 2: door and hope.

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Speaker 1: You didn't have a daughter banging on the door with

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Speaker 1: their fingers coming underneath the door trying to escape.

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Speaker 5: You guys would have put into bed and then just

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Speaker 5: gone to the theater.

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Speaker 2: Right, they slept through just you know.

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Speaker 5: Right.

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Speaker 1: So your podcast Mad About You, It's widely listened to

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Speaker 1: here on the Nova Network. Your listeners know plenty about

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Speaker 1: your present life and details. You've been quite open about it.

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Speaker 1: Give us a thumbnail.

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Speaker 7: Sketch of where you grew up, what was like, what

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Speaker 7: life was like, before you met as individuals, because I

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Speaker 7: don't think, I don't think your listeners out listeners.

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Speaker 1: Certainly probably don't know sure those sort of things. So

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Speaker 1: it just gives a little bit a bit of a

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Speaker 1: brief about.

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Speaker 3: That's a good question. Luck, Am I going first?

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Speaker 5: Are you go for it? You always put it on

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Speaker 5: me when you need a little bit extra thinking time,

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Speaker 5: whatever you want to do.

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Speaker 3: I think we grew up like a little bit differently.

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Speaker 6: So my parents were separated when I was about four

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Speaker 6: years old, so and then I grew up in very

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Speaker 6: close quarters mainly with my mother and sister, and I'd

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Speaker 6: see my father on weekends. So we were just in

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Speaker 6: each other's pockets basically, which I was obviously it's all

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Speaker 6: it's all you know, right growing up, So I thought

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Speaker 6: that was normal.

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Speaker 3: And I think.

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Speaker 6: I've now realized that family different family dynamics, have different

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Speaker 6: kind of boundaries and whatnot. So you know, you kind

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Speaker 6: of you kind of become familiar with that as you

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Speaker 6: grow older, and I realize that no, not everyone is

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Speaker 6: always in each other's pockets and business all the time.

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Speaker 6: But yeah, I moved around a lot, We moved home

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Speaker 6: a lot, We were always renting, so it was jumping

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Speaker 6: around a little. We moved to Adelaide for a little

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Speaker 6: stint as well, moved to schools, high schools I think

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Speaker 6: five times. That was for various reasons. No, well, like

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Speaker 6: a bit of bullying, to be honest, different kinds of scenario. Yeah,

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Speaker 6: I know I was the victim, so.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, based on oh, well, I don't know.

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Speaker 6: I feel like the school I started at, so started

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Speaker 6: high school at was Mossman Performing Arts High. So I

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Speaker 6: went for drama, which I was very excited about, and.

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Speaker 3: I just didn't really fit in. I felt a bit.

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Speaker 3: It's hard, it's hard to explain.

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Speaker 6: I almost felt young, like I was still in primary

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Speaker 6: school and I thought everyone else would be on the

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Speaker 6: same level. For example, I brought a tennis ball to

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Speaker 6: school on the first day, thinking everyone was going to

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Speaker 6: play handball, and all the kids were like kind of

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Speaker 6: wearing makeup and had their handbags and okay, we're wearing

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Speaker 6: their training bars and I was not there yet. So

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Speaker 6: I felt a little bit like, oh, what is this

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Speaker 6: kind of weird, almost adulty world that I've jumped into,

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Speaker 6: And felt a little bit out of my debts and

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Speaker 6: felt a bit like out of place, and you know,

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Speaker 6: so anyway, I just never really fit in. And then actually,

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Speaker 6: oh god, it's terrible to say out loud, but I

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Speaker 6: went to I find any excuse to go visit the nurse,

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Speaker 6: basically because I just wanted to get out of class.

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Speaker 3: There was this one class where I put.

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Speaker 6: My hand up, and I very much regret it, but

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Speaker 6: I put my hand up and I said my belly

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Speaker 6: button was hurting.

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Speaker 2: Sore enough to be bullied on.

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Speaker 6: Right, I had like a cut or something in there,

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Speaker 6: and I was like, well, might as well go to

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Speaker 6: the nurse's office.

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Speaker 3: So I actually ended up going home for the day.

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Speaker 3: I think the nurse was just sick of me, just

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Speaker 3: like go home. Whatever. And then from that point on

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Speaker 3: everyone called me belly butt girl.

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Speaker 6: Because I said it in front of my whole class,

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Speaker 6: and you know, billy button girl. They didn't let me

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Speaker 6: live that down. And I had to move schools obviously.

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Speaker 2: So someone out there listening to this has just gone.

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Speaker 6: And you know, there was no uniform, so I had

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Speaker 6: to keep up and I didn't have I came from

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Speaker 6: like very middle class, almost lower end of middle class,

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Speaker 6: so you know, I was sharing a room with my

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Speaker 6: sister until we were eighteen years old. Like we were

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Speaker 6: always in a small apartment altogether, and my mum did

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Speaker 6: her best to you know, give us experiences, you know,

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Speaker 6: in the heart of Sydney, and you know, working multiple

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Speaker 6: jobs to do that. So I really value what she

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Speaker 6: did for us. But yeah, it meant that, you know,

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Speaker 6: I didn't have everything that was at the shops and

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Speaker 6: so I was re wearing clothes and other kids weren't,

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Speaker 6: and it was kind of like, oh, you're an outfit.

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Speaker 3: Repeater and you know all that kind of stuff when

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Speaker 3: you're young.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, they did.

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Speaker 6: So I'm still in like the mindset of being a child, really,

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Speaker 6: and then you've got teen you know, teenagers who's who've

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Speaker 6: had other outside influence obviously.

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Speaker 3: But anyway, I moved around a lot.

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Speaker 6: I moved around a lot, and I feel like it

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Speaker 6: kind of it was it was probably a good thing

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Speaker 6: because I ended up being you know, I feel like

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Speaker 6: now I'm quite resilient.

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Speaker 3: I mixed in with a lot of different groups of people.

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Speaker 6: I know how to blend in and I know how

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Speaker 6: to chat to different kinds of people, and I like

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Speaker 6: that about my life, being able to connect with a

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Speaker 6: lot of different people. So yeah, I guess that's a

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Speaker 6: little snippet of me I've rambled on Lachlan, Sorry your turn.

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Speaker 5: I actually I actually wanted to ask you guys a question.

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Speaker 5: I know it's your pod and yours as questions, but

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Speaker 5: based on something that Jad said, we did have a

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Speaker 5: different dynamic growing up in terms of perhaps our relationships

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Speaker 5: with our parents because she was with her mum and

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Speaker 5: sister a lot, and I don't know, I would essentially

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Speaker 5: call them like a little girl gang, like they're very

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Speaker 5: very close, but I would say they're almost like best buds,

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Speaker 5: the three of them, which is really nice to see.

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Speaker 5: But as she said, I'm sure sometimes boundaries get cross

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Speaker 5: and stuff. But in your own experience having kids, obviously

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Speaker 5: we haven't really navigated that part of parent child relationships yet.

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Speaker 5: But what do you guys find works and doesn't work

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Speaker 5: in terms of like being really good friends with your

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Speaker 5: kids but then also being like parents and disciplinarians and

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Speaker 5: stuff like that, Like is there a fine line balance

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Speaker 5: like does one work better for you guys? Or have

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Speaker 5: you do you experiment with like you know, that's something

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Speaker 5: that we always go like, you know, I grew up

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Speaker 5: with probably the opposite, like which one is going to

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Speaker 5: work better? You know?

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Speaker 1: Right, what did you grow up with?

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Speaker 5: I would say perhaps a little bit more strict strict parents,

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Speaker 5: not saying that there were you know, crazy rules that

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Speaker 5: we couldn't buye by, but just having two parents in

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Speaker 5: the household, and they kind of both had each other's backs,

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Speaker 5: like if one said something, the other one just agreed

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Speaker 5: with them. But whereas I think what Chad experience was

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Speaker 5: that Mum would have a certain set of rules and

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Speaker 5: then when she go to dad's it would be opposite

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Speaker 5: and he would let them run amok. So it was

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Speaker 5: like this bit of a disparity between the two. So yeah,

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Speaker 5: I just I find that really interesting, Like what will

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Speaker 5: be better for your relationship with your kid in the

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Speaker 5: long run? Is being that friend with them or being

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Speaker 5: you know, a parent to them first and then a

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Speaker 5: friend second.

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Speaker 2: You know, I think it's such a balance. It's such

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Speaker 2: a balance because I have spent so much time with

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Speaker 2: our kids. I would stay at home mum by choice,

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Speaker 2: and then and Cam was away. He traveled so much.

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Speaker 2: There was a time where he was away for an

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Speaker 2: entire year. So it was me and the three kids

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Speaker 2: and my eldest particularly incredibly close, really really really close.

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Speaker 2: And what's what when the dynamic changed when she had

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Speaker 2: to move, she needed to move out, she needed to

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Speaker 2: to sort of grow and spread her wings, and she

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Speaker 2: was fine. It was me. It was really, it was

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Speaker 2: absolutely agonizing. It was like cutting my own arm off.

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Speaker 2: And that's when I I kind of thought, Oh, maybe

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Speaker 2: I've I might have overstepped in some way a boundary,

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Speaker 2: you know, and I've made her too much of a

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Speaker 2: confidant in a way in my life. Yeah, and I

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Speaker 2: think that there's it's like, I think it's I think

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Speaker 2: I'm really aware of how much internal chatter in my

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Speaker 2: brain I share with the kids because they don't need

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Speaker 2: to know everything. So I think that's where I draw

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Speaker 2: the line now, where it's like they don't want to

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Speaker 2: I don't. I'm not going to not share anything, but

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Speaker 2: I think there's some things you don't share with your kids.

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Speaker 2: So that had to sort of learn that because it

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Speaker 2: was like she was a bit too much of a

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Speaker 2: confidant for me, and I was like, nah, this isn't

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Speaker 2: hers to hold so but and now we've kind of

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Speaker 2: rebalanced it out again. But it was, Yeah, when that

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Speaker 2: first happened, it was like, yeah, I.

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Speaker 5: Think once I become with both adults, I think probably

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Speaker 5: there's a shift and it can be more like a

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Speaker 5: friend relationship.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I think for me it's it's more lock

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Speaker 1: what you're talking about. It's consistency with the messaging. If

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Speaker 1: the kids will learn really fast how to divide and conquer,

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Speaker 1: they just do so fast. Yeah, And whether it's about

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Speaker 1: a phone or whatever it is, if it's Lolly's or something,

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Speaker 1: they'll find a way to divide and conquer. But I

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Speaker 1: think that the most important thing that we learned as

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Speaker 1: young parents was to be consistent with our parenting and

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Speaker 1: know that you know, if Mum said this, then I

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Speaker 1: absolutely agree they weren't going to get it by me

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Speaker 1: or vice versa. And yeah, I think that's it gives

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Speaker 1: them a safe place. They actually know where they stand

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Speaker 1: with that way, so that it's like it's that was

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Speaker 1: put to us once. It was like give them law

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Speaker 1: with love. So they need to know, like you're talking

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Speaker 1: about resilience, and they need to know that the boundaries there,

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Speaker 1: because then they can play within those boundaries and bounce

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Speaker 1: off them and they know that you're going to be

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Speaker 1: there with a hand at their back just to kind

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Speaker 1: of push them back in the line and go, okay, yeah,

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Speaker 1: it didn't work that time, but let's see how it

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Speaker 1: goes this.

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Speaker 2: Time, so and you two will have this as well.

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Speaker 2: It's such a fascinating conversation when they get to adulthood

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Speaker 2: and then they say, oh, you know how you didn't

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Speaker 2: let us watch TV when when you were younger. I'm

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Speaker 2: so glad you didn't do that, And they complain like parents.

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Speaker 5: I can see that in myself.

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Speaker 4: You don't cave.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but then they get to an age where they

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Speaker 2: understand why you've done it because you just pushed us

303
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Speaker 2: outside and we played and we drew and we did

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Speaker 2: you know. I was like, oh my god, really, that's amazing.

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Speaker 3: Off.

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Speaker 1: Also, I learned this from their school actually that they

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Speaker 1: were going to. They went to a Steinus school in

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Speaker 1: Los Angeles. River was River was once. He wasn't at

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Speaker 1: school yet, Lotus was at school when nine to eleven happened,

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Speaker 1: and there of dealing with that was feeding them age

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Speaker 1: appropriate information, so they Lolo.

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Speaker 4: Actually I don't think she was even.

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Speaker 2: Told, none of them that it happened.

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Speaker 1: So it was just like they didn't need to know,

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Speaker 1: so we can overload our kids, I reckon with info.

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Speaker 1: So it's just like be aware of what as I

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Speaker 1: was saying, what messaging, what info you're giving them, and

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Speaker 1: make it age appropriate, you know.

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Speaker 6: From school, probably probably a parent's decisions to share.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, there's a lot of horrible things happening in the

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Speaker 5: world right now, and I always think about that, like

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Speaker 5: with access to social media and just the news constantly,

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Speaker 5: Like it's scary to think that kids can open their

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Speaker 5: phones and just access all those horrible things something in

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Speaker 5: the world. And as you said, it's good to be

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Speaker 5: like informed. I don't think they need to know about

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Speaker 5: those things when their brains can't even comprehend them yet,

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Speaker 5: or the feelings and emotions that come with them, you know.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, yeah, absolutely you can keep their childhood sweet

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Speaker 2: and simple what it needs to be, don't Yeah, did

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Speaker 2: you grow up with siblings?

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I'm one of five. Actually, are you really? Yeah,

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Speaker 5: I'm fourth, so I'm second youngest. So yeah, I guess

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Speaker 5: we can want my story now. So for asking you

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Speaker 5: guys a question, but I'm interested to learn from you

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Speaker 5: guys as well. So, yeah, I was one of five.

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Speaker 5: My dad moved here from Poland after the war with

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Speaker 5: his parents met my mum. She was an Aussie and

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Speaker 5: they had a fun little love story and met and

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Speaker 5: then had five kids. Dad was a dentist, Mum was

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Speaker 5: a doctor, and she kind of like yourself, Ali like,

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Speaker 5: chose to be a stay at home mum so sort

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Speaker 5: of hung up the boots on her career when when

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Speaker 5: she had kids, which was yeah, all of us look

345
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Speaker 5: back now and go, what a you know, amazing thing

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Speaker 5: to do, putting so much time and effort into your

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Speaker 5: you know, education and career and something you think you

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Speaker 5: want to do, and then the kids come along and

349
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Speaker 5: everything shifts, you know, so and we know how much

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Speaker 5: she loves it. Now. She's still like a walking encyclopedia.

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Speaker 5: You know. You ask her any question about anything, and she's, yeah,

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Speaker 5: unbelievably intelligent.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, no doubt.

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Speaker 5: But yeah, I grew up in like a house where

355
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Speaker 5: my mum and dad were I don't know, I would

356
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Speaker 5: say like they were both quite high achieving. They pushed

357
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Speaker 5: their kids quite hard, like a in an odd way,

358
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Speaker 5: like second was seen as not like a good thing.

359
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Speaker 5: It was always kind of like your your first or

360
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Speaker 5: your last.

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Speaker 3: Meanwhile, I was getting participation awards.

362
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Speaker 1: Right there.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, so we had we had a difference in that

364
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Speaker 5: regard kind of But that being said, I'm not complaining

365
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Speaker 5: about that. I kind of I kind of liked it.

366
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Speaker 5: I think that it it pushed pushed me to do things,

367
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Speaker 5: and I kind of liked the pressure of it and

368
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Speaker 5: stuff at times. Obviously when you're a kid, it's you know,

369
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Speaker 5: sometimes not nice when you want to have fun and

370
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Speaker 5: do things with your friends and YadA YadA. But yeah,

371
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Speaker 5: my parents are probably a little bit more disciplinarian. There was, like,

372
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Speaker 5: we had plenty of rules in the house, like no

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Speaker 5: TV during the week and stuff, and there was always

374
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Speaker 5: books and homework and extra study and we all went

375
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Speaker 5: to like extra tudor and stuff like that, and you know,

376
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Speaker 5: little things like that. They really valued education, also valued sport.

377
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Speaker 5: We all played, like loved our sports, so we're big

378
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Speaker 5: sport families. Still are.

379
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Speaker 2: Polish to you.

380
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Speaker 5: He actually lied to me about being able to speak

381
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Speaker 5: Polish for decades. Yeah, so he was kind of big

382
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Speaker 5: on when he came here. He was only five, so

383
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Speaker 5: just starting squiggle. And his parents were both born in

384
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Speaker 5: Poland they fled the war. They were very Polish and

385
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Speaker 5: still my grandmother's still alive and she still speaks with

386
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Speaker 5: a very heavy Polish accent and you know, loves going

387
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Speaker 5: to the Polish club and shopping at Polish shops and

388
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Speaker 5: Polish community stuff and YadA YadA. But when he came here,

389
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Speaker 5: he was kind of like, I want to be an

390
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Speaker 5: Aussie and I want to slip into Ozy culture and assimilate.

391
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Speaker 5: And his parents were kind of, you know, on the

392
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Speaker 5: ifs about doing that and kind of still wanted to

393
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Speaker 5: be involved in all the Polish stuff in Australia. So

394
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Speaker 5: when we were growing up, he actually, like, even when

395
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Speaker 5: we'd go to my grandparents' house and have dinner and

396
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Speaker 5: if they spoke Polish to each other, he would kind

397
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Speaker 5: of tell them to snap out of it and speak

398
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Speaker 5: English because the kids can't understand. And so he was

399
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Speaker 5: kind of always and I remember that I didn't really

400
00:19:08,920 --> 00:19:10,840
Speaker 5: think anything of it, but at the time, you know,

401
00:19:10,880 --> 00:19:12,639
Speaker 5: you're young and you just go, yeah, I actually I

402
00:19:12,680 --> 00:19:14,680
Speaker 5: want to hear what grandma and grandpa are talking about.

403
00:19:14,840 --> 00:19:17,479
Speaker 5: But then when I went and visited Poland with him

404
00:19:17,520 --> 00:19:21,360
Speaker 5: when I was about fourteen, we got there and obviously

405
00:19:21,680 --> 00:19:24,520
Speaker 5: all his Polish relatives in Poland can't speak English. Yeah,

406
00:19:24,640 --> 00:19:25,880
Speaker 5: so I was like, oh, this is gonna be interesting.

407
00:19:25,880 --> 00:19:26,920
Speaker 5: And then as soon as we got there he was

408
00:19:26,920 --> 00:19:28,280
Speaker 5: just speaking fluent Polish with them.

409
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Speaker 3: No, yeah, yeah, it's hilarious.

410
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Speaker 5: And then me and my sister who were there, we

411
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Speaker 5: were like, what is going on? Like you've told you

412
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Speaker 5: a whole family for fifteen years. Well I was fourteen,

413
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Speaker 5: but my siblings six years old. So for twenty years

414
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Speaker 5: he told them that he can't speak Polish and then

415
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Speaker 5: he just whipped up.

416
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Speaker 8: And then I thought to myself, I would love to

417
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Speaker 8: speak another language like Jad's mum speaks fluent Turkish and

418
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Speaker 8: I always say to her, feel free to teach little

419
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Speaker 8: one as much Turkish as like I would.

420
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Speaker 5: Love if he was bi lingulige. It would be amazing.

421
00:19:56,440 --> 00:19:58,360
Speaker 5: You know. I wish I had that skill to teach him,

422
00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:00,520
Speaker 5: but I don't, you know. So, yeah, there's this weird

423
00:20:00,520 --> 00:20:02,680
Speaker 5: one where he kind of, you know, I guess, wanted

424
00:20:02,720 --> 00:20:05,640
Speaker 5: to just be an Aussie and.

425
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Speaker 2: You hear that a lot.

426
00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:10,040
Speaker 1: Actually, where is he at now? Is he still in

427
00:20:10,080 --> 00:20:13,560
Speaker 1: that same boat? Does he whip out the Polish and

428
00:20:13,600 --> 00:20:14,360
Speaker 1: now he's in Australia.

429
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Speaker 5: Well he thinks it's a very funny thing now because

430
00:20:16,840 --> 00:20:18,720
Speaker 5: we always joke with him about it. Now because we

431
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:20,600
Speaker 5: know he can speak fluent Polish and he's been back

432
00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:22,960
Speaker 5: a few times, and you know, but I think he's

433
00:20:23,119 --> 00:20:27,520
Speaker 5: kind of a little bit more like appreciative of his

434
00:20:27,640 --> 00:20:29,920
Speaker 5: culture and realizes that you can love both. You don't

435
00:20:29,920 --> 00:20:32,239
Speaker 5: have to shun one and just take in the other.

436
00:20:32,359 --> 00:20:35,800
Speaker 5: You can have elements of both. And I think, yeah,

437
00:20:35,840 --> 00:20:37,760
Speaker 5: his parents probably went through a lot for him. And

438
00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:40,000
Speaker 5: as you get older and you sort of, you know,

439
00:20:40,040 --> 00:20:42,080
Speaker 5: reflect on that, you probably you know, you don't want

440
00:20:42,119 --> 00:20:44,640
Speaker 5: to say goodbye to those parts of your family history

441
00:20:44,640 --> 00:20:45,000
Speaker 5: and stuff.

442
00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:47,600
Speaker 2: So yeah, well, well with both of your backgrounds, do

443
00:20:47,800 --> 00:20:53,120
Speaker 2: either of your families celebrate Turkish traditions or Polish traditions?

444
00:20:53,119 --> 00:20:55,040
Speaker 2: Did that ever come in part of the family.

445
00:20:56,240 --> 00:20:59,560
Speaker 6: The only thing we celebrated, and loosely was by which

446
00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:02,520
Speaker 6: is what my parents always called like Turkish Christmas, which

447
00:21:02,840 --> 00:21:05,719
Speaker 6: you know, had nothing to do with Jesus Christ and

448
00:21:06,240 --> 00:21:09,879
Speaker 6: was basically I don't actually don't know the history of

449
00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:12,919
Speaker 6: the culture, like I don't I don't know the history

450
00:21:12,920 --> 00:21:16,439
Speaker 6: of biom itself. I should probably look into it, but

451
00:21:16,480 --> 00:21:18,800
Speaker 6: all I remember is we'd get to my grandparents' house

452
00:21:18,840 --> 00:21:20,560
Speaker 6: and we'd have to kiss her hand and put it

453
00:21:20,560 --> 00:21:21,240
Speaker 6: to our forehead.

454
00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:23,880
Speaker 3: That was like part of the tradition and then we'd

455
00:21:23,920 --> 00:21:30,280
Speaker 3: get money and yeah, so.

456
00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:34,080
Speaker 6: You do the hand kiss on the forehead, you eat

457
00:21:34,119 --> 00:21:36,080
Speaker 6: good food, and then you'd get money. And so I

458
00:21:36,119 --> 00:21:39,240
Speaker 6: always liked it as a kid, and then we as

459
00:21:39,280 --> 00:21:41,520
Speaker 6: we grew a bit older, we didn't really do it

460
00:21:41,520 --> 00:21:43,600
Speaker 6: as much because we just, I guess, had our own

461
00:21:43,640 --> 00:21:46,399
Speaker 6: freedoms and as a teenager, you want to, you know,

462
00:21:46,480 --> 00:21:48,560
Speaker 6: go and do your own thing. On the weekends, you're

463
00:21:48,560 --> 00:21:52,760
Speaker 6: probably seeing your grandparents maybe a bit less. Yeah, so

464
00:21:53,480 --> 00:21:58,000
Speaker 6: that's that's kind of really in terms of carrying tradition. Yeah,

465
00:21:58,040 --> 00:22:02,320
Speaker 6: we didn't really follow much through. Yeah, we're very much

466
00:22:02,480 --> 00:22:03,280
Speaker 6: like westernized.

467
00:22:03,320 --> 00:22:07,000
Speaker 1: I guess, what is your last name?

468
00:22:07,520 --> 00:22:13,560
Speaker 3: My maiden name is tunk To Rook. Yeah Rook in Turkish.

469
00:22:13,600 --> 00:22:18,880
Speaker 1: Rook yeah yeah yeah, unlockie yours is in the Turkish way,

470
00:22:19,640 --> 00:22:19,879
Speaker 1: in the.

471
00:22:20,680 --> 00:22:25,560
Speaker 5: Polish, the Polish Polish, my Polish, how you say? My

472
00:22:25,640 --> 00:22:29,600
Speaker 5: last name is Britsky. But finally, my last name actually

473
00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:33,040
Speaker 5: has changed. So my grandfather when he fled the war,

474
00:22:33,760 --> 00:22:36,720
Speaker 5: he actually came here and changed his last name because

475
00:22:37,280 --> 00:22:40,160
Speaker 5: they're obviously flying World War two and when the Jews

476
00:22:40,160 --> 00:22:42,760
Speaker 5: are essentially being hunted in Poland, and so he had

477
00:22:42,760 --> 00:22:45,840
Speaker 5: a very Jewish last name, and he was always fearful

478
00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:48,040
Speaker 5: that that would sort of happen again, so he wanted

479
00:22:48,080 --> 00:22:50,680
Speaker 5: to hide his family and the you know, the history

480
00:22:50,720 --> 00:22:53,280
Speaker 5: of it. So our name was actually well, not many

481
00:22:53,320 --> 00:22:54,760
Speaker 5: people know this. I've never really spoken about this, but

482
00:22:54,800 --> 00:22:58,159
Speaker 5: it was actually Landersberg, so my family name, and he

483
00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:02,639
Speaker 5: changed it to Bitski. Yeah, so that if ever changed,

484
00:23:03,480 --> 00:23:06,000
Speaker 5: if ever, you know, something similar happened, that you wouldn't

485
00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:08,880
Speaker 5: be identified by your last name as being Jewish. Yeah.

486
00:23:09,040 --> 00:23:13,680
Speaker 4: So yeah, that's when I was growing up in Victoria.

487
00:23:13,760 --> 00:23:16,520
Speaker 1: One of the guys, best footy player in our team,

488
00:23:16,960 --> 00:23:20,680
Speaker 1: his name was also changed. His grandparents changed their name

489
00:23:20,760 --> 00:23:22,800
Speaker 1: to protect them.

490
00:23:22,840 --> 00:23:25,520
Speaker 5: Crazy to think that's how many people, you know, as

491
00:23:25,520 --> 00:23:27,560
Speaker 5: you said, like you, I didn't know that was like

492
00:23:27,600 --> 00:23:29,720
Speaker 5: a regular thing. But I'm sure ye're now thinking that, Yeah,

493
00:23:29,800 --> 00:23:30,879
Speaker 5: plenty of people would have done it.

494
00:23:30,880 --> 00:23:46,520
Speaker 4: So yeah, yeah, so let's let's come to today. Then.

495
00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:51,760
Speaker 1: Now we've done a little history on you when and

496
00:23:51,960 --> 00:23:55,440
Speaker 1: once it's moving up, it's not really today because it's

497
00:23:55,600 --> 00:23:58,600
Speaker 1: when and how did you guys, you know we've got

498
00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:02,080
Speaker 1: we've got Turkish over here over here, how did you guys.

499
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:02,600
Speaker 4: Come to meet?

500
00:24:03,080 --> 00:24:05,320
Speaker 1: Just just give us a little bit of that meeting

501
00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:08,600
Speaker 1: story and and where you are today.

502
00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:11,360
Speaker 3: I feel like I always tell this story.

503
00:24:12,119 --> 00:24:19,440
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's better you.

504
00:24:18,720 --> 00:24:19,480
Speaker 3: To put it.

505
00:24:20,720 --> 00:24:25,960
Speaker 5: We met at a nightclub actually Sydney. Yeah, yeah, h Sydney.

506
00:24:26,000 --> 00:24:28,199
Speaker 5: So I worked on the door of a club for

507
00:24:28,240 --> 00:24:29,080
Speaker 5: about eight years.

508
00:24:29,600 --> 00:24:30,480
Speaker 3: They might know the club.

509
00:24:30,800 --> 00:24:33,280
Speaker 5: What do you guys know? A cargo bar and lounge.

510
00:24:33,359 --> 00:24:34,399
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, in the city.

511
00:24:34,560 --> 00:24:36,320
Speaker 2: Well I know it through through No, I know it

512
00:24:36,400 --> 00:24:39,280
Speaker 2: throughout teenagers.

513
00:24:41,359 --> 00:24:44,960
Speaker 1: You were here, You're probably the coolest dude in the town.

514
00:24:45,040 --> 00:24:48,199
Speaker 5: I was not. Yeah, I was definitely not that, but

515
00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:52,240
Speaker 5: I tricked everyone into thinking that, especially Jad.

516
00:24:52,760 --> 00:24:54,680
Speaker 4: Yeah, perception is everything, exactly.

517
00:24:54,840 --> 00:24:56,119
Speaker 5: Yeah, I had one night outfit.

518
00:24:56,280 --> 00:24:59,160
Speaker 2: You must have dealt with some crazy crab.

519
00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:02,760
Speaker 5: Oh I have. Yeah, a lot of interesting stories. When

520
00:25:02,800 --> 00:25:04,560
Speaker 5: I quit my parents it was like the happiest day

521
00:25:04,560 --> 00:25:04,880
Speaker 5: of their.

522
00:25:04,800 --> 00:25:08,080
Speaker 2: Lives, no doubt, just quickly, but because I want you

523
00:25:08,160 --> 00:25:10,879
Speaker 2: to continue with the story. But out of all, like

524
00:25:10,960 --> 00:25:14,720
Speaker 2: the challenging people that you deal with as a bouncer,

525
00:25:15,760 --> 00:25:18,840
Speaker 2: is it the teenage girls or is it the drunk fellows,

526
00:25:18,920 --> 00:25:20,960
Speaker 2: or who's the most difficult to deal with?

527
00:25:23,160 --> 00:25:27,280
Speaker 5: I would say that the drunk women are probably the

528
00:25:27,320 --> 00:25:32,639
Speaker 5: most argumentative. Yeah, sure, but I would say in terms

529
00:25:32,640 --> 00:25:35,560
Speaker 5: of like actually being fearful or worried, I think that

530
00:25:36,240 --> 00:25:40,560
Speaker 5: because a threat of violence often comes from men, especially

531
00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:43,560
Speaker 5: with you know, induced with alcohol, I would say I

532
00:25:43,560 --> 00:25:47,159
Speaker 5: would never really be fearful of having a conversational argument

533
00:25:47,200 --> 00:25:49,880
Speaker 5: with a drunk woman, but definitely with men, because I've

534
00:25:49,880 --> 00:25:52,600
Speaker 5: been you know, hit plenty of times bottles, you know,

535
00:25:52,720 --> 00:25:54,920
Speaker 5: everything from and you don't know, it's just one second

536
00:25:54,960 --> 00:25:57,280
Speaker 5: and they and obviously because they're not thinking about the

537
00:25:57,400 --> 00:26:01,240
Speaker 5: ramifications obviously because they're you know, in tox under the influence.

538
00:26:01,280 --> 00:26:05,199
Speaker 5: Then yeah. So but that being said, I've had a

539
00:26:05,280 --> 00:26:07,520
Speaker 5: knife pulled on me by a girl before and stuff.

540
00:26:07,560 --> 00:26:09,800
Speaker 5: So yeah, not to say that they're not also you know,

541
00:26:09,920 --> 00:26:16,440
Speaker 5: capable and potential to be violent. Yeah, yeah, so it's crazy.

542
00:26:16,640 --> 00:26:18,080
Speaker 5: Plenty of interesting stories.

543
00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:19,920
Speaker 1: Were you partial to If I turned up and gave

544
00:26:19,960 --> 00:26:22,000
Speaker 1: you a C note and stick it in your pocket,

545
00:26:22,240 --> 00:26:24,840
Speaker 1: in your hand and said, hey, hey, I skipped the

546
00:26:24,880 --> 00:26:27,680
Speaker 1: line that worked a tricky one.

547
00:26:27,720 --> 00:26:30,080
Speaker 5: If I thought that was gonna If I thought that

548
00:26:30,200 --> 00:26:32,600
Speaker 5: you could skate under the radar and nothing would happen

549
00:26:32,760 --> 00:26:34,879
Speaker 5: because of it, Like if you looked like a you know,

550
00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:36,840
Speaker 5: I think you have to become a pretty good judge

551
00:26:36,880 --> 00:26:38,879
Speaker 5: of character quite quickly when you when you work a

552
00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:41,080
Speaker 5: job like that. And I worked in a time, you know,

553
00:26:41,160 --> 00:26:44,600
Speaker 5: quite a while ago now whereby clubbing and stuff was

554
00:26:44,640 --> 00:26:47,359
Speaker 5: seen as quite a like prestigious thing at this place,

555
00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:49,359
Speaker 5: So it was a very specific type of person that

556
00:26:49,400 --> 00:26:52,879
Speaker 5: they wanted in, whereas I think now many places have

557
00:26:52,880 --> 00:26:54,560
Speaker 5: a bit more of like an open door policy everyone

558
00:26:54,560 --> 00:26:56,600
Speaker 5: come in. Like we walk around the city now and

559
00:26:56,640 --> 00:26:59,200
Speaker 5: I see kids going out clubbing in like shorts and

560
00:26:59,680 --> 00:27:02,520
Speaker 5: slip on shoes and stuff, you know, And did.

561
00:27:02,359 --> 00:27:05,440
Speaker 2: You know they're all wearing sneakers and pajama pants.

562
00:27:05,440 --> 00:27:06,200
Speaker 3: Do your time.

563
00:27:06,640 --> 00:27:09,600
Speaker 6: We all had to wear nine inch stilettos, carry them

564
00:27:09,600 --> 00:27:10,359
Speaker 6: around at the end of the night.

565
00:27:10,480 --> 00:27:11,120
Speaker 3: Do your time.

566
00:27:14,359 --> 00:27:16,880
Speaker 5: Yeah, So a different time, I think. So, Like if

567
00:27:16,920 --> 00:27:19,080
Speaker 5: you if you rocked up and you wearing you know,

568
00:27:19,680 --> 00:27:21,919
Speaker 5: baggy jeans and a ripped T shirt, and you slipped

569
00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:24,120
Speaker 5: me five hundred bucks, I'd still have to say no,

570
00:27:24,160 --> 00:27:26,200
Speaker 5: because if they saw you inside, I'd lose my job.

571
00:27:26,760 --> 00:27:28,600
Speaker 5: So it was a trigger one. If you addressed nicely

572
00:27:28,640 --> 00:27:30,520
Speaker 5: and you look like a stand up gentleman, and I

573
00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:33,480
Speaker 5: thought that you wouldn't cause any drama inside then yeah, sure,

574
00:27:33,520 --> 00:27:36,720
Speaker 5: we had plenty of nice relationships with regular people that

575
00:27:37,160 --> 00:27:40,040
Speaker 5: looked after me, you know, so extra yeah, yeah, yeah,

576
00:27:40,080 --> 00:27:42,800
Speaker 5: so but yeah, you looking like yourself? Yeah you could

577
00:27:42,960 --> 00:27:45,160
Speaker 5: you come in for sorry, you come in for a tenor.

578
00:27:47,560 --> 00:27:48,320
Speaker 2: Kenny Rogers?

579
00:27:49,240 --> 00:27:49,760
Speaker 3: You just.

580
00:27:52,240 --> 00:27:53,000
Speaker 1: Okay, okay.

581
00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:55,440
Speaker 5: So now you're working at the club, You're on the door,

582
00:27:56,840 --> 00:28:00,760
Speaker 5: and this absolute smoke show rops up and thens with her,

583
00:28:04,720 --> 00:28:07,880
Speaker 5: which was no. Jad just yeah, Jad rocked up and

584
00:28:08,160 --> 00:28:11,680
Speaker 5: obviously very beautiful young woman and looked amazing. But I

585
00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:14,680
Speaker 5: actually had a partner at the time, so yeah, when

586
00:28:14,720 --> 00:28:18,840
Speaker 5: we met, nothing really happened, but she sort of kept

587
00:28:18,920 --> 00:28:21,320
Speaker 5: rocking up, I would say, for the next like coming

588
00:28:21,320 --> 00:28:24,720
Speaker 5: weeks months, and you know, I was sort of thinking

589
00:28:24,760 --> 00:28:27,760
Speaker 5: to myself, like, oh, this girl's really intriguing, and you know,

590
00:28:27,800 --> 00:28:29,280
Speaker 5: she had this little aura about her and I thought

591
00:28:29,320 --> 00:28:31,320
Speaker 5: she was beautiful, and I kept thinking about her when

592
00:28:31,359 --> 00:28:33,240
Speaker 5: I wasn't at work, to the point where I was like, oh,

593
00:28:33,280 --> 00:28:36,840
Speaker 5: I probably shouldn't be dating this chick that I'm more

594
00:28:36,840 --> 00:28:39,080
Speaker 5: interested in someone that I'm not dating. So I kind

595
00:28:39,080 --> 00:28:41,760
Speaker 5: of sacked it off with the person I was dating

596
00:28:41,760 --> 00:28:45,680
Speaker 5: at the time and then told Yade I guess that

597
00:28:45,800 --> 00:28:48,200
Speaker 5: we were no longer seeing each other, and she pretended

598
00:28:48,240 --> 00:28:50,520
Speaker 5: to be sad for a little while and then two

599
00:28:50,560 --> 00:28:56,000
Speaker 5: seconds and then we started shouting and hanging out. But

600
00:28:56,200 --> 00:28:58,840
Speaker 5: we had a very brief stint when we first got together.

601
00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:00,960
Speaker 5: We're still quite young. And then I'm not sure if

602
00:29:01,120 --> 00:29:03,280
Speaker 5: you guys know, why would you but we we split

603
00:29:03,360 --> 00:29:06,000
Speaker 5: up actually for two and a half years years.

604
00:29:06,200 --> 00:29:08,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, dated other people during that, yeah.

605
00:29:08,040 --> 00:29:10,720
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yeah, wow. Yeah, So we actually had a

606
00:29:10,800 --> 00:29:12,520
Speaker 5: quite a long stint two and a half years I've

607
00:29:12,560 --> 00:29:14,800
Speaker 5: not been together. And there was no intention. I would

608
00:29:14,840 --> 00:29:17,000
Speaker 5: say we always figured that this. There was no like

609
00:29:17,040 --> 00:29:19,520
Speaker 5: we split up and we're like, hey, let's, you know,

610
00:29:19,520 --> 00:29:21,000
Speaker 5: see how things go and we'll get back together down

611
00:29:21,040 --> 00:29:22,520
Speaker 5: the track. It was like I see you later sort

612
00:29:22,520 --> 00:29:24,480
Speaker 5: of thing. And then two and a half years we

613
00:29:25,560 --> 00:29:28,320
Speaker 5: you know, found each other again. So it wasn't a

614
00:29:28,360 --> 00:29:30,640
Speaker 5: planned thing. But I think we both you know, grew

615
00:29:30,720 --> 00:29:32,480
Speaker 5: up and left the mark on each other perhaps in

616
00:29:32,480 --> 00:29:34,200
Speaker 5: the first little initial stage.

617
00:29:34,240 --> 00:29:36,520
Speaker 2: And was it accidental that you got back together in

618
00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:38,120
Speaker 2: two and a half years later. Did you bump into

619
00:29:38,160 --> 00:29:39,440
Speaker 2: each other or you sawt each other out?

620
00:29:39,600 --> 00:29:40,920
Speaker 5: She kept stalking at the club again.

621
00:29:41,840 --> 00:29:42,840
Speaker 4: Are you're still at the club.

622
00:29:42,960 --> 00:29:44,080
Speaker 5: Yeah, I worked about eight years.

623
00:29:44,160 --> 00:29:47,000
Speaker 6: Yeah, I went when you weren't there. Okay, that's the

624
00:29:47,040 --> 00:29:50,680
Speaker 6: actual story. I saw that he was overseas, and I

625
00:29:50,720 --> 00:29:53,200
Speaker 6: went to the club that he worked out, and obviously

626
00:29:53,240 --> 00:29:55,280
Speaker 6: his friend's gone and told him that I've come in

627
00:29:55,360 --> 00:29:56,800
Speaker 6: on the one weekend that he's not there.

628
00:29:56,840 --> 00:29:58,600
Speaker 3: Coincidentally, it wasn't a coincidence.

629
00:30:01,160 --> 00:30:02,840
Speaker 5: She was really surprised that they did that.

630
00:30:04,480 --> 00:30:06,080
Speaker 6: But then I think I went back a couple of

631
00:30:06,120 --> 00:30:09,160
Speaker 6: weeks later and we ended up chatting and realized that,

632
00:30:09,400 --> 00:30:12,080
Speaker 6: you know, there was obviously some sort of connection still there.

633
00:30:12,200 --> 00:30:14,160
Speaker 3: So yeah, one thing led to.

634
00:30:14,160 --> 00:30:16,080
Speaker 5: Another, and then once we I would say, once we

635
00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:18,000
Speaker 5: kicked it off the second time, it was kind of

636
00:30:18,040 --> 00:30:20,640
Speaker 5: like full steam ahead from the get go.

637
00:30:21,440 --> 00:30:22,560
Speaker 3: I was going to say the opposite.

638
00:30:23,880 --> 00:30:26,080
Speaker 5: Well, I mean like once we decided again for a

639
00:30:26,120 --> 00:30:28,880
Speaker 5: couple of you know, once we decided like let's let's

640
00:30:28,920 --> 00:30:30,800
Speaker 5: have a proper crack at this. I'm saying like it

641
00:30:30,880 --> 00:30:34,240
Speaker 5: was in each other's pockets from that move forward, like

642
00:30:34,280 --> 00:30:36,640
Speaker 5: we had a yeah, still a stage of like talking

643
00:30:36,680 --> 00:30:38,320
Speaker 5: and going is this going to be the right thing?

644
00:30:38,320 --> 00:30:40,400
Speaker 5: Should we do it? Should we not do it? For months?

645
00:30:40,400 --> 00:30:42,800
Speaker 5: And then probably I don't know, maybe four or five

646
00:30:42,800 --> 00:30:44,080
Speaker 5: months are doing that, and then we got to the

647
00:30:44,120 --> 00:30:46,600
Speaker 5: stage we were like, hey, let's have a proper crack

648
00:30:46,640 --> 00:30:49,200
Speaker 5: at this. And then once we made that decision, it

649
00:30:49,360 --> 00:30:51,120
Speaker 5: was off to the races and how.

650
00:30:51,520 --> 00:30:55,480
Speaker 2: Much longer but to little little one Fletcher right till

651
00:30:55,520 --> 00:30:59,040
Speaker 2: he came along six a while.

652
00:30:59,200 --> 00:31:02,240
Speaker 5: Yeah, we were to get for three before we got engaged,

653
00:31:02,240 --> 00:31:03,840
Speaker 5: and then we got engaged and you can get married

654
00:31:03,880 --> 00:31:05,960
Speaker 5: for two because of COVID, and then we were married

655
00:31:05,960 --> 00:31:07,440
Speaker 5: for it. Yeah, so maybe six years.

656
00:31:07,840 --> 00:31:11,280
Speaker 2: We've had a fairly long stint up until little one.

657
00:31:11,360 --> 00:31:14,360
Speaker 2: How has life changed for you since having your son.

658
00:31:17,080 --> 00:31:17,480
Speaker 3: Entirely?

659
00:31:17,760 --> 00:31:21,320
Speaker 6: Yeah, you can't really explain it, can you. Gosh, it's

660
00:31:21,360 --> 00:31:24,040
Speaker 6: just something you have to experience, and even then you

661
00:31:24,080 --> 00:31:28,600
Speaker 6: can't you still can't really articulate it. But yeah, I mean,

662
00:31:29,600 --> 00:31:32,120
Speaker 6: I think the challenge of finding the balance between your

663
00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:36,640
Speaker 6: old life and new you know, working and being a

664
00:31:36,760 --> 00:31:40,680
Speaker 6: parent and prioritizing different things at different times, which is

665
00:31:40,800 --> 00:31:43,920
Speaker 6: never the housework. Let me tell you, the house unfortunately,

666
00:31:43,960 --> 00:31:46,160
Speaker 6: has been the thing that has constantly suffered.

667
00:31:46,840 --> 00:31:47,800
Speaker 4: I think that's okay.

668
00:31:48,120 --> 00:31:52,560
Speaker 6: Yeah, so you know, we prioritized time with our son

669
00:31:52,640 --> 00:31:55,600
Speaker 6: and then time with each other, which is very sparing,

670
00:31:55,720 --> 00:31:59,080
Speaker 6: especially since we had a child that didn't sleep for

671
00:31:59,120 --> 00:32:02,320
Speaker 6: eleven and a half, which was very challenging. I'm talking

672
00:32:02,400 --> 00:32:05,280
Speaker 6: up every overnight every half an hour to forty five minutes,

673
00:32:05,400 --> 00:32:10,600
Speaker 6: like very very bad. So we've only just started really

674
00:32:10,640 --> 00:32:13,920
Speaker 6: having our nights back, which is nice to finally have

675
00:32:14,040 --> 00:32:15,320
Speaker 6: that time back together again.

676
00:32:15,760 --> 00:32:18,600
Speaker 1: That because he was colicky or was there something, but

677
00:32:18,720 --> 00:32:23,280
Speaker 1: he's just just just not a developed.

678
00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:26,600
Speaker 6: Poor sleep associations. I think, just lots of rocking, bouncing,

679
00:32:27,800 --> 00:32:31,400
Speaker 6: contact sleeping, lots of contact sleeping, so he just would

680
00:32:31,480 --> 00:32:35,239
Speaker 6: never go down really and in the moments that he

681
00:32:35,400 --> 00:32:37,920
Speaker 6: was down, he still needed some kind of movement, so

682
00:32:37,960 --> 00:32:39,760
Speaker 6: we were you know, the jiggling of the crib, and

683
00:32:39,800 --> 00:32:43,560
Speaker 6: it just got relentless really to the point where we

684
00:32:43,920 --> 00:32:47,480
Speaker 6: very recently ended up needing to sleep train him, and

685
00:32:47,560 --> 00:32:51,120
Speaker 6: that was challenging in itself, but it has absolutely changed

686
00:32:51,120 --> 00:32:51,680
Speaker 6: our lives.

687
00:32:52,120 --> 00:32:58,000
Speaker 3: We are very great and I'm sure, yeah, yeah, exactly.

688
00:32:58,200 --> 00:33:00,920
Speaker 2: So did you have those moments where like you finally

689
00:33:00,960 --> 00:33:02,840
Speaker 2: get them to sleep and then you've got to reverse

690
00:33:03,000 --> 00:33:04,880
Speaker 2: out of the room and you're like doing it at

691
00:33:04,960 --> 00:33:08,160
Speaker 2: sort of turtle speed, like every Commando crawl on the

692
00:33:08,360 --> 00:33:09,400
Speaker 2: floor we.

693
00:33:09,400 --> 00:33:11,080
Speaker 5: Have done it, or walking out of the city for

694
00:33:11,160 --> 00:33:13,320
Speaker 5: three hours and the dark so someone can sleep. And

695
00:33:13,320 --> 00:33:15,080
Speaker 5: then we moved into his room, one of us, so

696
00:33:15,120 --> 00:33:16,840
Speaker 5: we do one night each sleeping in his room so

697
00:33:16,880 --> 00:33:18,600
Speaker 5: we could be there as soon as he stirred. For

698
00:33:18,680 --> 00:33:21,960
Speaker 5: months and yeah, just we just you know, it's your

699
00:33:21,960 --> 00:33:23,560
Speaker 5: first one. You don't really know what you're doing, and

700
00:33:23,920 --> 00:33:25,480
Speaker 5: it hits you and you've got to learn on the go.

701
00:33:25,640 --> 00:33:28,120
Speaker 5: And yeah, you know, even at eleven months in, we

702
00:33:28,160 --> 00:33:30,120
Speaker 5: still I guess, didn't know what we were doing in

703
00:33:30,160 --> 00:33:32,400
Speaker 5: that yeah regard, so we needed to outsource, got a

704
00:33:32,440 --> 00:33:35,440
Speaker 5: little bit of help and now we feel Also, I

705
00:33:35,440 --> 00:33:38,000
Speaker 5: think once you learn a couple of tips and tricks

706
00:33:38,000 --> 00:33:39,480
Speaker 5: and you learn how important you know you guys are

707
00:33:39,480 --> 00:33:42,400
Speaker 5: speaking about before, like boundaries and routine and structure for

708
00:33:42,440 --> 00:33:44,840
Speaker 5: a kid, I think it sets a good precedent for

709
00:33:44,880 --> 00:33:46,760
Speaker 5: your next kid, you know. So coming we're a little bit,

710
00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:48,840
Speaker 5: you know, I wouldn't say I'm nervous at all about

711
00:33:48,960 --> 00:33:50,920
Speaker 5: the you know, the next kid and stuff, because you

712
00:33:51,240 --> 00:33:53,120
Speaker 5: have all the skills and you know hours and you

713
00:33:53,200 --> 00:33:55,760
Speaker 5: quiver ready. Whereas the first time we were like, you know,

714
00:33:55,760 --> 00:33:57,160
Speaker 5: you come home and you're like, oh, my god, what

715
00:33:57,480 --> 00:33:57,800
Speaker 5: did we do?

716
00:33:58,240 --> 00:34:01,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, they are different though, you know, I mean, I

717
00:34:01,640 --> 00:34:06,560
Speaker 1: think that's a thing we can as parents have that

718
00:34:06,600 --> 00:34:09,640
Speaker 1: expectation that the next one, oh, it'll be the same same.

719
00:34:09,840 --> 00:34:12,680
Speaker 1: I watched Ali go through three very different birth processes

720
00:34:12,719 --> 00:34:17,640
Speaker 1: with our kids, and certainly, and they are three highly

721
00:34:18,040 --> 00:34:20,960
Speaker 1: different duels, you know, our kids.

722
00:34:21,000 --> 00:34:25,640
Speaker 5: So you can't use the cookie cutter approach with certain things.

723
00:34:25,719 --> 00:34:28,719
Speaker 2: You can, like you know, like the sleep training. Now

724
00:34:28,760 --> 00:34:32,120
Speaker 2: that you know it, you know it, and so usually

725
00:34:32,160 --> 00:34:35,359
Speaker 2: that always will work with each child. But yeah, there's

726
00:34:35,400 --> 00:34:38,640
Speaker 2: certain things that yeah, like you know, you'd think after

727
00:34:38,840 --> 00:34:42,319
Speaker 2: three babies our third breastfeeding was going to be like

728
00:34:42,360 --> 00:34:45,160
Speaker 2: a dream and so easy. I needed help with breastfeeding

729
00:34:45,200 --> 00:34:47,120
Speaker 2: with our third because she just wouldn't latch, And I

730
00:34:47,160 --> 00:34:49,279
Speaker 2: was like, how is the heck, I'm not doing this,

731
00:34:49,520 --> 00:34:52,760
Speaker 2: like I've done this twice already. But yeah, you start,

732
00:34:53,160 --> 00:34:54,160
Speaker 2: you know, different things.

733
00:34:54,280 --> 00:34:56,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think they do pick up on the relaxed

734
00:34:56,719 --> 00:34:59,160
Speaker 1: nature that the first one. Like you say, you can

735
00:34:59,200 --> 00:35:00,600
Speaker 1: read all the books you want want, watch all the

736
00:35:00,680 --> 00:35:07,759
Speaker 1: videos and the podcast, but faced with it because it's

737
00:35:07,800 --> 00:35:09,520
Speaker 1: coming from your perspective.

738
00:35:09,440 --> 00:35:12,520
Speaker 6: And it's everyone is so different, everyone's experience is so

739
00:35:12,960 --> 00:35:14,160
Speaker 6: with such different children.

740
00:35:15,120 --> 00:35:18,640
Speaker 5: We've seen that even like as an example, and you

741
00:35:18,680 --> 00:35:21,000
Speaker 5: see it and you can recognize it but then not

742
00:35:21,080 --> 00:35:24,880
Speaker 5: replicate it. So my sister, for example, she's unbelievably relaxed

743
00:35:24,920 --> 00:35:26,960
Speaker 5: and such a good mum, and it shows that the kids,

744
00:35:27,040 --> 00:35:29,759
Speaker 5: you know, they're very well mannered and temperament and they're

745
00:35:29,840 --> 00:35:32,360
Speaker 5: very relaxed and easy going. And then we've hung around

746
00:35:32,360 --> 00:35:34,719
Speaker 5: other people and their kids who aren't that way, and

747
00:35:34,760 --> 00:35:37,160
Speaker 5: you can see, you know, and before we had kids,

748
00:35:37,160 --> 00:35:38,960
Speaker 5: we could recognize that, and then you go, Okay, I

749
00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:40,759
Speaker 5: want to be I want to be like this one. Yeah,

750
00:35:41,000 --> 00:35:43,000
Speaker 5: but then it comes and you're like, oh, it's really

751
00:35:43,040 --> 00:35:45,879
Speaker 5: hard to be Like that's so true.

752
00:35:46,520 --> 00:35:49,160
Speaker 2: So with number two on the way, when is your due.

753
00:35:49,040 --> 00:35:51,200
Speaker 3: Date for number I'm do early December?

754
00:35:51,840 --> 00:35:56,120
Speaker 6: Oh little, yes, yes, I did look at the dates

755
00:35:56,160 --> 00:35:59,040
Speaker 6: to make sure it wasn't a Christmas baby, because I've

756
00:35:59,080 --> 00:36:01,239
Speaker 6: heard that that's not the best birthday to have. Yeah,

757
00:36:02,280 --> 00:36:05,560
Speaker 6: so hard for them, Yeah, yeah, yeah, you want them

758
00:36:05,600 --> 00:36:06,399
Speaker 6: to have their own day.

759
00:36:06,440 --> 00:36:08,680
Speaker 3: They only get one, you know, that's right.

760
00:36:08,880 --> 00:36:11,120
Speaker 6: So and you know, people being away out of town,

761
00:36:11,239 --> 00:36:12,400
Speaker 6: your friends are never around.

762
00:36:12,440 --> 00:36:14,040
Speaker 3: I imagine that would be a bit crappy.

763
00:36:14,680 --> 00:36:17,799
Speaker 6: Yeah, but yeah, so early December, which I feel is

764
00:36:18,080 --> 00:36:21,399
Speaker 6: far enough from Christmas that it's still a Christmas gift

765
00:36:21,400 --> 00:36:24,279
Speaker 6: for us, and you know they get to have.

766
00:36:25,040 --> 00:36:27,160
Speaker 1: A nice cocoon around Christmas as well.

767
00:36:27,239 --> 00:36:29,799
Speaker 3: Yeah, year, yeah it is.

768
00:36:30,160 --> 00:36:32,320
Speaker 2: So you're heading back into the newborn phase.

769
00:36:32,520 --> 00:36:34,160
Speaker 3: Yes, yeah, how.

770
00:36:34,000 --> 00:36:35,040
Speaker 2: Do we feel about that?

771
00:36:35,320 --> 00:36:40,799
Speaker 3: You're okay? God, I don't know. We just got quiety exactly,

772
00:36:41,280 --> 00:36:41,560
Speaker 3: we have.

773
00:36:41,880 --> 00:36:44,360
Speaker 6: He sleeps twelve hours over night now without a peep,

774
00:36:44,480 --> 00:36:46,960
Speaker 6: which is just a miracle compared to the year we've had.

775
00:36:47,080 --> 00:36:51,480
Speaker 6: So it's to know that we're coming back to the

776
00:36:51,560 --> 00:36:57,439
Speaker 6: rocking and the bouncing and the scene that we think

777
00:36:57,520 --> 00:37:00,719
Speaker 6: we're a bit more prepared now, but you still will

778
00:37:00,800 --> 00:37:03,000
Speaker 6: need you know, they need overnight feeds and stuff. It's

779
00:37:03,040 --> 00:37:05,440
Speaker 6: very different at the start. I've forgotten what it's like

780
00:37:05,440 --> 00:37:07,759
Speaker 6: to haven't you born? It was, it was not very

781
00:37:07,760 --> 00:37:10,880
Speaker 6: long ago. I've totally forgotten. My sister just had a

782
00:37:10,920 --> 00:37:16,160
Speaker 6: baby six weeks ago, so I'm actually relearning through her now,

783
00:37:16,200 --> 00:37:18,560
Speaker 6: which is hilarious, and I'm like, I forgot I need

784
00:37:18,560 --> 00:37:23,120
Speaker 6: to burn the baby. I totally forgot about burping. Why

785
00:37:23,200 --> 00:37:24,719
Speaker 6: do they need to be burped so much?

786
00:37:25,239 --> 00:37:25,440
Speaker 3: You know?

787
00:37:25,840 --> 00:37:28,000
Speaker 6: They fall asleep on the bottle. Can we not put

788
00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:29,360
Speaker 6: the baby down? No, you've got to get them up,

789
00:37:29,400 --> 00:37:30,960
Speaker 6: wake them up, and burn them and then put them

790
00:37:31,000 --> 00:37:31,920
Speaker 6: down anyway.

791
00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:33,120
Speaker 3: So there's a lot you forget.

792
00:37:33,320 --> 00:37:34,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's so true.

793
00:37:34,480 --> 00:37:36,279
Speaker 3: Oh god, it's relentlessly What have you?

794
00:37:36,360 --> 00:37:38,080
Speaker 4: What have you learned about yourselves?

795
00:37:39,120 --> 00:37:44,160
Speaker 1: You know what surprised you that is in becoming parents?

796
00:37:44,239 --> 00:37:48,040
Speaker 1: That where's your human evolution? What have you learned about

797
00:37:48,040 --> 00:37:49,680
Speaker 1: yourselves from being a parent?

798
00:37:51,440 --> 00:37:57,279
Speaker 5: I would say that it's such a like biological thing

799
00:37:58,040 --> 00:38:00,600
Speaker 5: that you just suddenly start feeling all these things and

800
00:38:00,640 --> 00:38:03,080
Speaker 5: you have no control over them in the best way possible,

801
00:38:03,120 --> 00:38:08,520
Speaker 5: Like it's such a strong pull and drive when you

802
00:38:08,600 --> 00:38:12,839
Speaker 5: have a child, Like it's indescribable, And that's a really

803
00:38:12,960 --> 00:38:16,400
Speaker 5: beautiful thing, I would say. But I think also I

804
00:38:16,440 --> 00:38:19,680
Speaker 5: think I would say something that hit me the most

805
00:38:19,719 --> 00:38:21,640
Speaker 5: is I think a lot of external things that I

806
00:38:21,760 --> 00:38:24,200
Speaker 5: used to I guess, worry about or care about like

807
00:38:24,239 --> 00:38:27,200
Speaker 5: suddenly meant nothing. Like I was like, as long as

808
00:38:27,200 --> 00:38:30,120
Speaker 5: I have my family and everyone's healthy and happy and

809
00:38:30,160 --> 00:38:32,040
Speaker 5: doing well, then that's kind of all that matters. And

810
00:38:32,080 --> 00:38:36,000
Speaker 5: everything else is external. And I think another thing really

811
00:38:36,040 --> 00:38:38,839
Speaker 5: helped with confidence, I would say like, I don't know why.

812
00:38:39,120 --> 00:38:41,040
Speaker 5: I can't really explain that, but it was something that

813
00:38:41,080 --> 00:38:43,279
Speaker 5: I saw in my parents, Like I was when I

814
00:38:43,280 --> 00:38:45,480
Speaker 5: was growing up. I always thought to myself, like, my

815
00:38:45,480 --> 00:38:47,880
Speaker 5: parents don't give a shit what other people think, like

816
00:38:49,480 --> 00:38:51,160
Speaker 5: in the sense that they would just do what's best

817
00:38:51,160 --> 00:38:52,960
Speaker 5: for their family. They wouldn't care about what anyone said

818
00:38:53,040 --> 00:38:55,719
Speaker 5: or thought. And now having a kid, I kind of

819
00:38:55,800 --> 00:38:59,480
Speaker 5: understand that. I'm like, I don't really care what people

820
00:38:59,520 --> 00:39:03,239
Speaker 5: think more because it's all sort of irrelevant, and you know,

821
00:39:03,280 --> 00:39:06,200
Speaker 5: which is yeah, an odd thing to come to after

822
00:39:06,239 --> 00:39:08,439
Speaker 5: having a kid, and I can't really explain it, but yeah,

823
00:39:08,520 --> 00:39:11,640
Speaker 5: confidence and not really yeah, yeah.

824
00:39:12,000 --> 00:39:14,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, absolutely a lot of what Lock said.

825
00:39:14,880 --> 00:39:17,839
Speaker 6: And also I guess I think I've realized that I'm

826
00:39:17,880 --> 00:39:19,560
Speaker 6: far more capable than I thought I was.

827
00:39:20,320 --> 00:39:21,920
Speaker 3: So it's weird.

828
00:39:22,239 --> 00:39:26,200
Speaker 6: In some ways, I felt less confident, I guess finding

829
00:39:26,239 --> 00:39:31,839
Speaker 6: myself in this in my career, for example, I felt

830
00:39:31,880 --> 00:39:35,040
Speaker 6: really out of place for a while rejoining that and

831
00:39:35,280 --> 00:39:39,239
Speaker 6: as this new person, and I felt like, your whole

832
00:39:39,280 --> 00:39:42,400
Speaker 6: life changes, but the world keeps spinning, you know, And

833
00:39:42,440 --> 00:39:44,239
Speaker 6: that's how it feels. You go out, you go back

834
00:39:44,280 --> 00:39:46,040
Speaker 6: to the things you used to go to all the time,

835
00:39:46,160 --> 00:39:48,000
Speaker 6: and it feels really different to be there in that

836
00:39:48,080 --> 00:39:51,319
Speaker 6: same environment as this new person and no one It's like,

837
00:39:52,239 --> 00:39:54,200
Speaker 6: you feel like no one can see that in you,

838
00:39:54,239 --> 00:39:56,440
Speaker 6: and you don't know how to articulate that to people

839
00:39:56,440 --> 00:39:59,120
Speaker 6: who haven't had kids and don't understand. So there was

840
00:39:59,800 --> 00:40:04,040
Speaker 6: a feeling of just being out of place for a while.

841
00:40:04,120 --> 00:40:07,040
Speaker 6: And I've only just started finding my feet again, which

842
00:40:07,080 --> 00:40:10,440
Speaker 6: is really nice. But so there was this weird almost

843
00:40:10,640 --> 00:40:14,600
Speaker 6: lack of confidence and then more confidence in other ways

844
00:40:14,640 --> 00:40:16,839
Speaker 6: and in other areas and realizing that I can do

845
00:40:16,920 --> 00:40:19,560
Speaker 6: more than I thought I could and I'm really capable.

846
00:40:19,719 --> 00:40:22,160
Speaker 6: You know, I breastfed for longer than I thought I could,

847
00:40:22,280 --> 00:40:26,480
Speaker 6: and you know you'd understand that's obviously something that is

848
00:40:26,600 --> 00:40:28,719
Speaker 6: a hurdle in so many different ways for so many

849
00:40:28,719 --> 00:40:32,320
Speaker 6: different women. So, yeah, realizing that I'm far more capable,

850
00:40:32,719 --> 00:40:36,799
Speaker 6: and yeah, feeling confident and finding your place in this

851
00:40:36,880 --> 00:40:40,560
Speaker 6: new life in the same world has been really interesting

852
00:40:40,880 --> 00:40:52,600
Speaker 6: but cool.

853
00:40:52,920 --> 00:40:55,520
Speaker 2: You mentioned your career. How did you get to know

854
00:40:55,680 --> 00:40:58,800
Speaker 2: the podcast? Did walk us through those steps?

855
00:40:58,800 --> 00:41:01,360
Speaker 1: Good question because you've do reality TV.

856
00:41:01,880 --> 00:41:04,880
Speaker 5: Interesting story. We just made stupid videos online and they

857
00:41:04,880 --> 00:41:06,320
Speaker 5: were like, do you want to talk.

858
00:41:08,239 --> 00:41:08,399
Speaker 3: That.

859
00:41:09,640 --> 00:41:11,960
Speaker 5: I think it was what was the stupid videos?

860
00:41:12,000 --> 00:41:12,920
Speaker 4: What was the content of that?

861
00:41:13,160 --> 00:41:13,359
Speaker 2: Oh?

862
00:41:13,400 --> 00:41:16,919
Speaker 5: Look, nor asking me dumb hypotheticals.

863
00:41:17,600 --> 00:41:19,680
Speaker 6: I stick my phone in lock space all the time

864
00:41:20,960 --> 00:41:24,000
Speaker 6: and just off the bat, start talking and hopefully he

865
00:41:24,080 --> 00:41:26,799
Speaker 6: comes up with something good in return. Sometimes they're not good,

866
00:41:26,920 --> 00:41:29,440
Speaker 6: so not all of them get posted, but sometimes he

867
00:41:29,520 --> 00:41:31,640
Speaker 6: comes back with with some pretty good energy.

868
00:41:31,760 --> 00:41:33,840
Speaker 1: We'll do one of those albums that they're all the

869
00:41:33,840 --> 00:41:37,400
Speaker 1: ones that got away.

870
00:41:35,760 --> 00:41:37,880
Speaker 5: The Horrible Crickets.

871
00:41:37,880 --> 00:41:40,400
Speaker 3: Absolutely, it's just going, what are you're talking about?

872
00:41:40,520 --> 00:41:43,680
Speaker 6: Me going, you're supposed to play with me here, you know,

873
00:41:43,800 --> 00:41:45,680
Speaker 6: like give me something back, And he's like, but you're

874
00:41:45,680 --> 00:41:47,040
Speaker 6: not saying anything interesting.

875
00:41:48,000 --> 00:41:50,359
Speaker 3: I'm like, okay, all right, we'll ditch this one.

876
00:41:50,400 --> 00:41:52,680
Speaker 6: But yeah, basically it was we were making these silly

877
00:41:53,239 --> 00:41:57,520
Speaker 6: kind of skiddy videos, you know, yeah, mainly on TikTok.

878
00:41:57,600 --> 00:41:59,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean we used to do the one Instagram

879
00:42:00,160 --> 00:42:02,399
Speaker 3: I did. You were in a few of them.

880
00:42:02,600 --> 00:42:05,640
Speaker 6: I've always been, for some reason, really comfortable in front

881
00:42:05,680 --> 00:42:07,600
Speaker 6: of a camera on my own.

882
00:42:07,920 --> 00:42:11,000
Speaker 2: Moving around, you know, you're saying, just having to start

883
00:42:11,040 --> 00:42:11,960
Speaker 2: again again again.

884
00:42:12,239 --> 00:42:15,239
Speaker 6: My mom's really confident, Like she's the kind of person

885
00:42:15,280 --> 00:42:16,880
Speaker 6: where you go you look great, she goes, I know,

886
00:42:17,800 --> 00:42:20,719
Speaker 6: and which is lovely because you know, a lot of

887
00:42:20,760 --> 00:42:23,600
Speaker 6: the time that's not what you're hearing a little girl.

888
00:42:23,800 --> 00:42:26,200
Speaker 6: So yeah, and so that's what I heard growing up,

889
00:42:26,200 --> 00:42:28,080
Speaker 6: and I think that's rubbed off on me a bit

890
00:42:28,400 --> 00:42:32,400
Speaker 6: and it, you know, I think her confidence has definitely

891
00:42:32,600 --> 00:42:34,239
Speaker 6: it's shining through me now.

892
00:42:34,320 --> 00:42:35,640
Speaker 3: So I do appreciate that.

893
00:42:35,719 --> 00:42:39,359
Speaker 2: But yeah, was there one video that just skyrocketed both

894
00:42:39,400 --> 00:42:42,200
Speaker 2: of you did? What went nuts? Viraly not?

895
00:42:43,120 --> 00:42:46,360
Speaker 6: There's a few that have gone viral, like millions of hits,

896
00:42:46,440 --> 00:42:49,399
Speaker 6: and it's generally something ridiculous that you were just it's

897
00:42:49,440 --> 00:42:51,640
Speaker 6: not planned. Like there's a video where Locke and I

898
00:42:51,680 --> 00:42:54,920
Speaker 6: are holding hands and there's a tree and we've stopped

899
00:42:55,000 --> 00:42:57,000
Speaker 6: because we've both gone on either side of the tree,

900
00:42:57,000 --> 00:42:59,640
Speaker 6: and we're arguing over who should go around the tree.

901
00:43:00,040 --> 00:43:02,640
Speaker 1: Face is planned? Who was filming this?

902
00:43:02,960 --> 00:43:04,239
Speaker 3: I just pulled my phone.

903
00:43:04,480 --> 00:43:07,880
Speaker 5: We started, and then jad will just pull out a

904
00:43:07,920 --> 00:43:08,880
Speaker 5: camera and so I.

905
00:43:09,360 --> 00:43:12,440
Speaker 6: Will acknowledge that the moment could be funny captured. So

906
00:43:12,480 --> 00:43:14,799
Speaker 6: we're already arguing about the tree and I'm gonna whip

907
00:43:14,840 --> 00:43:17,640
Speaker 6: my phone out, so we naturally find ourselves in this situation.

908
00:43:17,800 --> 00:43:20,160
Speaker 6: I see and then we play up to.

909
00:43:20,080 --> 00:43:20,680
Speaker 3: Them a little bit.

910
00:43:20,719 --> 00:43:23,600
Speaker 5: We don't have someone that follows us around funny moments,

911
00:43:23,600 --> 00:43:28,919
Speaker 5: goes all right, capturing.

912
00:43:28,719 --> 00:43:31,400
Speaker 1: Because never realized what it's a fair question someone's holding

913
00:43:31,440 --> 00:43:31,920
Speaker 1: that camera.

914
00:43:32,080 --> 00:43:34,520
Speaker 3: I know I don't want to watch that.

915
00:43:35,239 --> 00:43:36,640
Speaker 5: I'm being manipul.

916
00:43:38,040 --> 00:43:40,160
Speaker 3: So yeah, that's how we started.

917
00:43:40,200 --> 00:43:44,000
Speaker 6: And I think that our energy just they I guess,

918
00:43:44,120 --> 00:43:45,880
Speaker 6: decided that it could be good on a pod and

919
00:43:45,920 --> 00:43:46,399
Speaker 6: here we are.

920
00:43:46,640 --> 00:43:51,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm sure because you're you know, your personas are online,

921
00:43:51,640 --> 00:43:54,719
Speaker 2: between TikTok and Instagram and now the podcast, you would

922
00:43:54,760 --> 00:44:00,239
Speaker 2: have dealt with the trolling and the haters. How has

923
00:44:00,280 --> 00:44:03,080
Speaker 2: that affected you or how do you cope with that?

924
00:44:03,239 --> 00:44:05,920
Speaker 2: Is it ever sort of bled into your relationship and

925
00:44:05,960 --> 00:44:08,560
Speaker 2: it's been a challenge with both of you at all?

926
00:44:08,719 --> 00:44:11,439
Speaker 3: Or I don't think so much.

927
00:44:11,480 --> 00:44:16,520
Speaker 6: Our relationship definitely has affected my confidence over time, which

928
00:44:16,560 --> 00:44:19,440
Speaker 6: has been a challenge to kind of grow from, and

929
00:44:19,480 --> 00:44:22,719
Speaker 6: still at times find myself feeling a bit affected by

930
00:44:22,719 --> 00:44:26,000
Speaker 6: certain things. Less I think now that I'm a mum, less.

931
00:44:25,840 --> 00:44:28,360
Speaker 3: It's like, well I know that, I don't.

932
00:44:28,120 --> 00:44:30,799
Speaker 6: Know, it just feels more insignificant. You know, you can

933
00:44:30,880 --> 00:44:33,720
Speaker 6: kind of compartmentalize and go, well, this is my real life.

934
00:44:34,200 --> 00:44:36,759
Speaker 6: I don't know you and for some reason you're bitter

935
00:44:36,800 --> 00:44:39,160
Speaker 6: and that's your own issue, you know, so you can

936
00:44:39,200 --> 00:44:40,280
Speaker 6: separate it a bit better.

937
00:44:41,640 --> 00:44:44,959
Speaker 3: But yeah, it does. It has absolutely played its part

938
00:44:45,600 --> 00:44:46,360
Speaker 3: over the years.

939
00:44:46,440 --> 00:44:49,160
Speaker 6: I've been online since I was fourteen, I think, like

940
00:44:49,200 --> 00:44:52,839
Speaker 6: I started blogging, So my journey on the internet has

941
00:44:53,239 --> 00:44:58,479
Speaker 6: has been fast. Yeah, and received trolls the whole time.

942
00:44:58,640 --> 00:45:00,719
Speaker 6: So you know, it's something I'm very much use to.

943
00:45:01,360 --> 00:45:04,640
Speaker 6: It comes in different kind of waves and at different times,

944
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:09,600
Speaker 6: and yeah, I think now it's more Now, what's more

945
00:45:09,680 --> 00:45:13,439
Speaker 6: challenging is navigating the online world as parents who are

946
00:45:13,560 --> 00:45:14,919
Speaker 6: very open with.

947
00:45:14,840 --> 00:45:17,640
Speaker 3: Their lives and show a lot of their lives.

948
00:45:17,880 --> 00:45:19,920
Speaker 6: And you know, now we're a family unit, so it's

949
00:45:19,960 --> 00:45:21,680
Speaker 6: like how much of that are we wanting to share

950
00:45:22,400 --> 00:45:25,520
Speaker 6: and what's important to not share and how is that

951
00:45:25,560 --> 00:45:28,120
Speaker 6: going to affect our kids in the future. And so

952
00:45:28,239 --> 00:45:32,320
Speaker 6: now it's a whole different thing really, Yeah.

953
00:45:31,640 --> 00:45:33,799
Speaker 5: Something that I often think about actually now that I'm

954
00:45:33,840 --> 00:45:37,640
Speaker 5: a parent and we have this weird catch twenty two

955
00:45:37,719 --> 00:45:40,040
Speaker 5: where we live a lot of our lives online or

956
00:45:40,080 --> 00:45:42,760
Speaker 5: as as Chad said, we share a lot, whether it's

957
00:45:43,080 --> 00:45:46,360
Speaker 5: whatever platform or the podcast, whatever, and something that we

958
00:45:46,400 --> 00:45:48,439
Speaker 5: actually both agreed on early on in parents is that

959
00:45:48,800 --> 00:45:52,120
Speaker 5: we actually didn't want our kids having social media for

960
00:45:52,200 --> 00:45:54,880
Speaker 5: a long long time, or even using screens for that matter,

961
00:45:55,120 --> 00:45:58,040
Speaker 5: and stuff like that. But that feels like a bit

962
00:45:58,040 --> 00:46:01,680
Speaker 5: of a you know, popclorin kettle black, because we essentially

963
00:46:01,719 --> 00:46:03,680
Speaker 5: live our lives. It's you know, it's a form of

964
00:46:03,680 --> 00:46:05,200
Speaker 5: income for us and stuff like that. But then we're

965
00:46:05,239 --> 00:46:07,239
Speaker 5: going to tell our kids not to do it and

966
00:46:07,640 --> 00:46:09,200
Speaker 5: not saying I don't think we have the right to

967
00:46:09,239 --> 00:46:11,200
Speaker 5: do that as their parents, to help them, you know,

968
00:46:12,000 --> 00:46:15,319
Speaker 5: do what we think is best. That's your feels It

969
00:46:15,360 --> 00:46:19,560
Speaker 5: feels a little bit, you know, weird that we're gonna

970
00:46:19,800 --> 00:46:22,920
Speaker 5: essentially tell them not to do what we do for

971
00:46:23,640 --> 00:46:26,439
Speaker 5: a long time. You know, so they're kids. Yeah yah,

972
00:46:26,520 --> 00:46:28,760
Speaker 5: But how did you guys navigate that yourself? Because obviously,

973
00:46:29,080 --> 00:46:31,399
Speaker 5: I think your kids, I can only assume they grew

974
00:46:31,480 --> 00:46:33,239
Speaker 5: up with the Internet era, probably at the beginning of

975
00:46:33,239 --> 00:46:36,520
Speaker 5: stuff like Instagram and Facebook and all that, so I'm

976
00:46:36,520 --> 00:46:38,960
Speaker 5: sure it would have been, you know, a tricky thing

977
00:46:39,000 --> 00:46:40,880
Speaker 5: for you guys to navigate, especially, I would say, not

978
00:46:41,080 --> 00:46:44,360
Speaker 5: knowing I guess the ramifications of it, or the or

979
00:46:44,400 --> 00:46:46,200
Speaker 5: the pros and cons of it back when it started

980
00:46:46,239 --> 00:46:49,520
Speaker 5: now having looking back, going oh shit, maybe we wouldn't

981
00:46:49,520 --> 00:46:51,200
Speaker 5: have if if we knew more, you know.

982
00:46:51,320 --> 00:46:55,640
Speaker 2: So, yeah, we drove them crazy with our different options.

983
00:46:55,680 --> 00:46:59,239
Speaker 2: Like for our eldest, she had we put a we

984
00:46:59,280 --> 00:47:02,880
Speaker 2: put a landline in her bedroom, bless you. So she

985
00:47:03,000 --> 00:47:06,719
Speaker 2: loved you and your friends. Yah, there's a landline. That

986
00:47:06,840 --> 00:47:08,600
Speaker 2: kid never used it once, not once?

987
00:47:10,040 --> 00:47:12,040
Speaker 5: Then, do you know why? Because none of her friends

988
00:47:12,040 --> 00:47:12,600
Speaker 5: had landlines.

989
00:47:12,600 --> 00:47:14,840
Speaker 2: There was no one to call exactly, and she was

990
00:47:14,840 --> 00:47:17,279
Speaker 2: too shy to talk on the phone. So then she

991
00:47:17,400 --> 00:47:19,719
Speaker 2: got just like one of those little flip phones. That

992
00:47:19,880 --> 00:47:21,400
Speaker 2: was the first thing. And that was when she was

993
00:47:21,440 --> 00:47:26,480
Speaker 2: about fourteen fifteen. Yeah, so we didn't we didn't go

994
00:47:26,520 --> 00:47:28,799
Speaker 2: to a smartphone for any of the kids till they

995
00:47:28,800 --> 00:47:33,120
Speaker 2: were about fourteen. We kept them just yeah, the little

996
00:47:33,160 --> 00:47:33,840
Speaker 2: flip ones.

997
00:47:33,880 --> 00:47:35,200
Speaker 5: Did you see any shift?

998
00:47:35,640 --> 00:47:39,800
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, because the immediately they just dove straight into

999
00:47:39,840 --> 00:47:43,719
Speaker 1: that world immediately, you know. And then and then our

1000
00:47:43,800 --> 00:47:46,960
Speaker 1: son was playing Minecraft. One day we got a bill

1001
00:47:47,080 --> 00:47:50,920
Speaker 1: for like online. So this is a big thing for

1002
00:47:50,960 --> 00:47:52,799
Speaker 1: me to understand because we've got a bill for like

1003
00:47:52,840 --> 00:47:54,680
Speaker 1: five hundred bucks or something, and.

1004
00:47:55,360 --> 00:47:58,200
Speaker 5: It's really invest in the game. Or something.

1005
00:47:59,040 --> 00:48:02,920
Speaker 1: Ownership advised bought these bricks and I'm like, can you

1006
00:48:03,000 --> 00:48:07,040
Speaker 1: show me? Can you show me what with the five

1007
00:48:07,120 --> 00:48:07,719
Speaker 1: hundred dollars?

1008
00:48:07,800 --> 00:48:08,600
Speaker 4: Where are the bricks?

1009
00:48:08,640 --> 00:48:11,040
Speaker 1: And he goes, well, they're in the game, but I

1010
00:48:11,160 --> 00:48:13,120
Speaker 1: might have lost them and and everything.

1011
00:48:13,160 --> 00:48:17,560
Speaker 2: But he didn't understand it was like game money. He

1012
00:48:17,719 --> 00:48:19,160
Speaker 2: liked real money.

1013
00:48:19,239 --> 00:48:20,720
Speaker 4: Yeah, he didn't realize.

1014
00:48:20,719 --> 00:48:22,480
Speaker 3: What do you think he really didn't understand.

1015
00:48:26,840 --> 00:48:29,879
Speaker 1: He's the divide and conquer one. His name is River

1016
00:48:30,000 --> 00:48:33,479
Speaker 1: for a reason. He's like the Colorado made the Grand

1017
00:48:33,560 --> 00:48:37,640
Speaker 1: Canyon does the same thing. Yeah, but I don't know.

1018
00:48:37,680 --> 00:48:39,399
Speaker 1: I give him I've found the benefit of the doubt.

1019
00:48:39,400 --> 00:48:41,560
Speaker 1: I don't think he actually knew where it was coming.

1020
00:48:41,560 --> 00:48:41,840
Speaker 5: He had no.

1021
00:48:42,000 --> 00:48:43,719
Speaker 1: I don't think he went that far ahead to go

1022
00:48:44,160 --> 00:48:45,120
Speaker 1: it's mum and Dad's money.

1023
00:48:45,120 --> 00:48:45,719
Speaker 5: I'm using here.

1024
00:48:45,800 --> 00:48:48,400
Speaker 2: It was also at a time that we were really broke.

1025
00:48:49,800 --> 00:48:50,640
Speaker 4: It was a hard one.

1026
00:48:51,440 --> 00:48:54,320
Speaker 3: No, did you call the company?

1027
00:48:54,400 --> 00:48:56,600
Speaker 1: No, No, they're not going to They're not going to care.

1028
00:48:56,760 --> 00:48:58,960
Speaker 3: Are They bought the bricks paved?

1029
00:48:59,480 --> 00:49:03,600
Speaker 2: He bought it an iPad also on auction on my

1030
00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:07,239
Speaker 2: and at least I was able to get that back.

1031
00:49:07,320 --> 00:49:08,160
Speaker 3: Oh thank good.

1032
00:49:08,239 --> 00:49:12,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, I get this message saying congratulations, you want an iPad?

1033
00:49:12,400 --> 00:49:13,719
Speaker 2: And I was like, it's a scam. I was like,

1034
00:49:13,960 --> 00:49:17,360
Speaker 2: holy ship, I really what who's bought an eyebad?

1035
00:49:17,840 --> 00:49:18,000
Speaker 1: No?

1036
00:49:19,440 --> 00:49:21,080
Speaker 5: Nice that they tell it's nice that they say that

1037
00:49:21,120 --> 00:49:24,640
Speaker 5: you won even though you're paying. Did you see a

1038
00:49:24,680 --> 00:49:29,319
Speaker 5: shift like I would like behaviorally? Yeah, you know like

1039
00:49:30,600 --> 00:49:33,200
Speaker 5: and but seeing that, then what do you do? You know?

1040
00:49:33,280 --> 00:49:35,600
Speaker 5: Because this is what we worry about, is like it's

1041
00:49:35,640 --> 00:49:36,080
Speaker 5: hard to get.

1042
00:49:36,520 --> 00:49:37,000
Speaker 4: What do you do?

1043
00:49:37,440 --> 00:49:39,120
Speaker 1: You can't you can't put it back in the box.

1044
00:49:39,800 --> 00:49:42,360
Speaker 1: That's the thing to remember is once you do decide

1045
00:49:42,360 --> 00:49:46,359
Speaker 1: to screen, it's you know, you can't put that cat

1046
00:49:46,400 --> 00:49:47,000
Speaker 1: back in the box.

1047
00:49:47,000 --> 00:49:50,440
Speaker 6: Son's one, and he will pick up my phone because

1048
00:49:50,440 --> 00:49:52,600
Speaker 6: he obviously sees me on it from time to time.

1049
00:49:52,760 --> 00:49:55,480
Speaker 6: We also call our grandma's and FaceTime, so that's the

1050
00:49:55,520 --> 00:49:58,240
Speaker 6: screen time he gets. And he'll pick up the phone

1051
00:49:58,320 --> 00:50:01,480
Speaker 6: and we we say no to him. So he started

1052
00:50:01,520 --> 00:50:04,359
Speaker 6: doing this thing where he says no preemptively. So he'll

1053
00:50:04,360 --> 00:50:07,279
Speaker 6: go for the phone and he'll go no, and then

1054
00:50:07,280 --> 00:50:09,160
Speaker 6: he'll pick it up and you'll start running around the

1055
00:50:09,239 --> 00:50:10,920
Speaker 6: room because he thinks it's funny. And then when you

1056
00:50:10,960 --> 00:50:12,840
Speaker 6: take it off him, he starts throwing a fit.

1057
00:50:14,880 --> 00:50:15,560
Speaker 3: The phone.

1058
00:50:16,040 --> 00:50:18,480
Speaker 5: I can't imagine how he would react if we actually

1059
00:50:18,520 --> 00:50:21,600
Speaker 5: let him use to watch stuff and then tried to

1060
00:50:21,640 --> 00:50:24,240
Speaker 5: take that away from him, like because seeing his behavior

1061
00:50:24,280 --> 00:50:27,840
Speaker 5: shift even for that two seconds. Yeah, we're just scared

1062
00:50:27,880 --> 00:50:29,759
Speaker 5: about how the screens and screen time.

1063
00:50:29,840 --> 00:50:32,800
Speaker 2: And if you think about the way you guys were raised,

1064
00:50:32,880 --> 00:50:36,760
Speaker 2: your mum and dad, they heard everything that you were saying,

1065
00:50:37,040 --> 00:50:39,399
Speaker 2: They saw everything you were seeing. You know, they were

1066
00:50:39,440 --> 00:50:42,800
Speaker 2: there with you one hundred percent. There wasn't a third party.

1067
00:50:44,480 --> 00:50:47,160
Speaker 2: So that's what I think about, like, you know, to

1068
00:50:47,400 --> 00:50:50,239
Speaker 2: just not if you're with you know, if you take

1069
00:50:50,280 --> 00:50:52,400
Speaker 2: your son to the park, just don't take your phone

1070
00:50:52,520 --> 00:50:54,120
Speaker 2: so he gets just to see.

1071
00:50:53,880 --> 00:50:56,400
Speaker 1: That it's yeah, you're without the phone.

1072
00:50:57,000 --> 00:50:57,239
Speaker 3: I mean.

1073
00:50:57,320 --> 00:51:00,600
Speaker 1: And there's some great people out there, Maggie Dan, different

1074
00:51:00,640 --> 00:51:03,879
Speaker 1: people who are who are have.

1075
00:51:04,080 --> 00:51:06,520
Speaker 4: Great information about this. I think I don't know.

1076
00:51:06,480 --> 00:51:11,480
Speaker 1: That where the greatest because our kids were pre a

1077
00:51:11,480 --> 00:51:14,840
Speaker 1: lot of what this is, so, you know, but I

1078
00:51:14,880 --> 00:51:18,480
Speaker 1: do know that I do know that Lotus, who is

1079
00:51:18,520 --> 00:51:21,840
Speaker 1: our eldest one, who had the least of it. You know,

1080
00:51:21,960 --> 00:51:25,800
Speaker 1: she's her imagination is wild, you know, and she's really

1081
00:51:26,280 --> 00:51:29,600
Speaker 1: dexterous in her arts, like she crochets. She does a

1082
00:51:29,600 --> 00:51:33,040
Speaker 1: lot of mixed media stuff, so she she uses a

1083
00:51:33,080 --> 00:51:35,319
Speaker 1: screen every now and again. And I think that's part

1084
00:51:35,360 --> 00:51:37,920
Speaker 1: of where we're at now. You can't you can't avoid it.

1085
00:51:37,920 --> 00:51:39,239
Speaker 4: It's just part of it job.

1086
00:51:39,360 --> 00:51:41,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, business.

1087
00:51:41,600 --> 00:51:43,439
Speaker 5: It's like what they do in schools now, right, every

1088
00:51:43,480 --> 00:51:45,520
Speaker 5: kid gets a laptop or an iPad and they all

1089
00:51:45,600 --> 00:51:47,920
Speaker 5: learn on a screen. On the boards and chalk and

1090
00:51:47,920 --> 00:51:51,040
Speaker 5: whiteboards anymore, you know, it's all different. So it is

1091
00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:55,040
Speaker 5: not the chalk how I learned. I was. I was chalkboards.

1092
00:51:56,640 --> 00:51:58,080
Speaker 5: I had both my school. They didn't have a lot

1093
00:51:58,120 --> 00:52:00,799
Speaker 5: of fun things boards.

1094
00:52:00,520 --> 00:52:02,239
Speaker 1: And being hit by a piece of chalk was a

1095
00:52:02,280 --> 00:52:05,160
Speaker 1: lot better than a whiteboard panther the teacher through it

1096
00:52:05,160 --> 00:52:09,080
Speaker 1: out or the dust with white child.

1097
00:52:09,160 --> 00:52:16,520
Speaker 3: Oh no, they can't do that anymore, to do that better.

1098
00:52:16,320 --> 00:52:17,120
Speaker 5: Than simpler times.

1099
00:52:18,600 --> 00:52:21,080
Speaker 1: So are you still you've got your clothing label?

1100
00:52:21,239 --> 00:52:24,720
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, it is both of us. It's both yeah, yeah.

1101
00:52:24,560 --> 00:52:28,600
Speaker 1: Okay, that's cool. Okay, So are you are you both designing?

1102
00:52:29,160 --> 00:52:29,919
Speaker 4: Tell us about that?

1103
00:52:29,960 --> 00:52:33,680
Speaker 6: Well, I generally run the creative side and Locke runs

1104
00:52:34,200 --> 00:52:38,160
Speaker 6: everything else. So but however, we've kind of it's been

1105
00:52:38,200 --> 00:52:40,919
Speaker 6: on hold for a while whilst we've had our son.

1106
00:52:41,120 --> 00:52:43,400
Speaker 6: So it got to a point where we were juggling

1107
00:52:43,520 --> 00:52:45,239
Speaker 6: a bit too much and it was kind of like, well,

1108
00:52:45,280 --> 00:52:47,799
Speaker 6: something's got to give here, And unfortunately that was the

1109
00:52:47,840 --> 00:52:50,080
Speaker 6: thing that was kind of pushed to the side temporarily.

1110
00:52:50,160 --> 00:52:52,920
Speaker 6: So we're yet to kind of revisit that.

1111
00:52:53,480 --> 00:52:56,359
Speaker 5: On hold. She means no new development or stuff comes out.

1112
00:52:56,400 --> 00:52:58,440
Speaker 5: The business still runs and stuff cells that we have,

1113
00:52:58,560 --> 00:53:02,120
Speaker 5: but we haven't been products or creating new things.

1114
00:53:02,239 --> 00:53:02,479
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1115
00:53:02,520 --> 00:53:05,160
Speaker 6: Sure, sure, Yeah, it's been less of a focus, just

1116
00:53:05,320 --> 00:53:09,040
Speaker 6: as we've kind of regained ourselves as human beings.

1117
00:53:09,120 --> 00:53:10,520
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1118
00:53:10,560 --> 00:53:12,960
Speaker 1: And it's busy doing a podcast, isn't it. I mean

1119
00:53:13,000 --> 00:53:13,959
Speaker 1: you've got to take that.

1120
00:53:13,920 --> 00:53:16,120
Speaker 3: Takes time and everything.

1121
00:53:16,480 --> 00:53:19,120
Speaker 4: Yeah, to research and do all that sort of business.

1122
00:53:19,200 --> 00:53:22,799
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, but you are you're going to dive back

1123
00:53:22,800 --> 00:53:23,239
Speaker 1: into it.

1124
00:53:23,480 --> 00:53:26,400
Speaker 6: Yeah, I'd love to have a lot of different plans

1125
00:53:26,440 --> 00:53:28,520
Speaker 6: for it, So we'll see where we owned up.

1126
00:53:28,560 --> 00:53:29,280
Speaker 2: But we've got time.

1127
00:53:29,600 --> 00:53:30,839
Speaker 6: It's a bit of we need to do a little

1128
00:53:30,840 --> 00:53:33,000
Speaker 6: bit of discovery, make a few decisions, and then we

1129
00:53:33,040 --> 00:53:36,839
Speaker 6: can get cracking again. But yeah, it's unfortunately just been

1130
00:53:37,680 --> 00:53:38,920
Speaker 6: shelved temporarily.

1131
00:53:39,040 --> 00:53:44,320
Speaker 1: Hey, we we do a thing called well, we've changed

1132
00:53:44,320 --> 00:53:47,640
Speaker 1: our names. It depends on Week's a week I wrote

1133
00:53:47,640 --> 00:53:48,760
Speaker 1: the pulse, yeah.

1134
00:53:48,600 --> 00:53:53,120
Speaker 2: And I say rapid heartbeat. But anyway, it's where it's

1135
00:53:53,160 --> 00:53:54,600
Speaker 2: where we are figured it out.

1136
00:53:54,840 --> 00:53:56,120
Speaker 3: Question your answer?

1137
00:53:56,200 --> 00:53:56,399
Speaker 2: Sure?

1138
00:53:56,680 --> 00:53:59,160
Speaker 4: On our old mine was the two minute shower. So yeah,

1139
00:54:00,000 --> 00:54:00,799
Speaker 4: it doesn't really work.

1140
00:54:01,600 --> 00:54:02,839
Speaker 2: We never got that one wrong.

1141
00:54:03,640 --> 00:54:03,920
Speaker 4: That one.

1142
00:54:03,960 --> 00:54:05,360
Speaker 2: We constantly get it wrong.

1143
00:54:05,520 --> 00:54:07,000
Speaker 5: Anyway, So how do we do? Are we going to

1144
00:54:07,160 --> 00:54:09,480
Speaker 5: go one of each of us first? Or was?

1145
00:54:09,719 --> 00:54:11,240
Speaker 4: Well, you guys decide who's.

1146
00:54:11,080 --> 00:54:13,520
Speaker 1: Going to answer the question first, but you want you

1147
00:54:13,600 --> 00:54:17,600
Speaker 1: both to answer it. So the first question, what brings

1148
00:54:17,640 --> 00:54:19,200
Speaker 1: you joy?

1149
00:54:19,520 --> 00:54:20,120
Speaker 3: My family?

1150
00:54:20,440 --> 00:54:21,560
Speaker 5: Oh? Family, for sure.

1151
00:54:22,000 --> 00:54:24,320
Speaker 3: You can't just copy me the whole time was a

1152
00:54:24,320 --> 00:54:26,640
Speaker 3: great answer. You need your own answers.

1153
00:54:26,120 --> 00:54:34,879
Speaker 2: Okay, and Fletcher, Okay, do I have to ask? Yeah,

1154
00:54:35,760 --> 00:54:37,279
Speaker 2: you set it up for me like this.

1155
00:54:37,440 --> 00:54:38,040
Speaker 1: I actually did.

1156
00:54:38,320 --> 00:54:39,839
Speaker 4: I would have. I would have asked this one.

1157
00:54:39,880 --> 00:54:41,840
Speaker 1: But that's okay, Okay.

1158
00:54:42,040 --> 00:54:44,360
Speaker 4: If you don't want to answer it, you just say, well.

1159
00:54:44,520 --> 00:54:48,399
Speaker 2: This from my husband. Describe each other in three emojis.

1160
00:54:49,120 --> 00:54:57,360
Speaker 6: Oh, I don't know what emogs are called, just describe

1161
00:54:57,360 --> 00:54:59,080
Speaker 6: it love heart emoji.

1162
00:55:00,680 --> 00:55:01,080
Speaker 5: Boring.

1163
00:55:04,320 --> 00:55:07,640
Speaker 6: There's so many emojis trying to pick the right ones.

1164
00:55:10,800 --> 00:55:15,520
Speaker 6: Is there a brain emoji brain the emoji.

1165
00:55:15,680 --> 00:55:20,279
Speaker 3: And the cow because he eats a lot of meat.

1166
00:55:22,200 --> 00:55:23,880
Speaker 5: Cow's grass made no.

1167
00:55:23,719 --> 00:55:27,000
Speaker 3: No, but cow is beef. Come on, sweetheart?

1168
00:55:27,320 --> 00:55:33,280
Speaker 5: Am I doing her like? I'm just the they're really

1169
00:55:33,520 --> 00:55:36,759
Speaker 5: like losing it face of laughing. Who often laughs at

1170
00:55:36,760 --> 00:55:39,880
Speaker 5: her own jokes. I don't make her laugh often.

1171
00:55:42,000 --> 00:55:47,440
Speaker 9: Uh the love hard eyes, she's yeah, she's just I

1172
00:55:47,480 --> 00:55:52,240
Speaker 9: find it very captivating and yeah, I'm very infatuated with her.

1173
00:55:52,840 --> 00:55:58,680
Speaker 5: And then the little family emoji's cute. Yeah, very special

1174
00:55:58,680 --> 00:56:01,680
Speaker 5: to us now I think, yeah, we had a nice

1175
00:56:01,719 --> 00:56:04,440
Speaker 5: life together, but now being in this next stage, it's yeah,

1176
00:56:04,760 --> 00:56:06,839
Speaker 5: we're both very family orientated, and I think that it's

1177
00:56:07,040 --> 00:56:08,640
Speaker 5: been the best thing that we've ever done. So yeah,

1178
00:56:08,640 --> 00:56:10,240
Speaker 5: we both love being a family.

1179
00:56:10,360 --> 00:56:15,600
Speaker 2: You can add the pregnant emoji then.

1180
00:56:15,000 --> 00:56:16,560
Speaker 5: Can just thought she had a big brecky.

1181
00:56:18,280 --> 00:56:19,320
Speaker 2: With all different colors.

1182
00:56:19,360 --> 00:56:22,400
Speaker 3: It's actually a boy pregnant emoji. I think, is there?

1183
00:56:22,640 --> 00:56:24,400
Speaker 3: Am I making that up? There is?

1184
00:56:24,520 --> 00:56:24,719
Speaker 5: Right?

1185
00:56:24,880 --> 00:56:26,640
Speaker 2: Well, okay, that's cool.

1186
00:56:27,800 --> 00:56:29,600
Speaker 5: Still maybe I'm making that up.

1187
00:56:29,640 --> 00:56:30,399
Speaker 3: Maybe I saw it.

1188
00:56:30,600 --> 00:56:32,080
Speaker 5: I saw it once upon a time.

1189
00:56:32,200 --> 00:56:33,839
Speaker 3: Saw an edited emoji there is.

1190
00:56:34,040 --> 00:56:37,239
Speaker 4: Yeah, here we go. Now we've established that.

1191
00:56:39,719 --> 00:56:43,520
Speaker 1: We've got that pregnant what do you miss when you're

1192
00:56:43,560 --> 00:56:44,360
Speaker 1: not together?

1193
00:56:46,480 --> 00:56:47,720
Speaker 5: It's a rapid fire MANE.

1194
00:56:47,880 --> 00:56:50,680
Speaker 6: I know, I know, I know, but it's hard because

1195
00:56:50,760 --> 00:56:55,640
Speaker 6: we're together all the time, but we're not together present.

1196
00:56:55,400 --> 00:56:56,080
Speaker 3: You know what I mean?

1197
00:56:57,160 --> 00:56:58,640
Speaker 5: Miss being told what to do?

1198
00:57:01,120 --> 00:57:04,600
Speaker 6: I miss being present with you, like you know, being

1199
00:57:04,640 --> 00:57:07,680
Speaker 6: able to like having a child obviously takes a lot

1200
00:57:07,680 --> 00:57:09,120
Speaker 6: of your attention away from each other.

1201
00:57:09,520 --> 00:57:10,239
Speaker 3: So I miss that.

1202
00:57:10,640 --> 00:57:15,760
Speaker 2: Ye all right, okay, last question? One word to describe

1203
00:57:15,800 --> 00:57:16,240
Speaker 2: each other?

1204
00:57:18,960 --> 00:57:20,520
Speaker 3: Test you charismatic?

1205
00:57:20,880 --> 00:57:21,480
Speaker 1: Oh?

1206
00:57:22,040 --> 00:57:27,640
Speaker 2: Aura, Oh, we've not had either of those, noop in

1207
00:57:27,720 --> 00:57:29,840
Speaker 2: all the years. That's good.

1208
00:57:30,120 --> 00:57:31,000
Speaker 4: I'm speechless.

1209
00:57:32,920 --> 00:57:34,000
Speaker 2: You guys did good?

1210
00:57:34,720 --> 00:57:34,959
Speaker 9: Wow?

1211
00:57:35,040 --> 00:57:37,080
Speaker 3: Wait what are your words for each other? Where else?

1212
00:57:37,200 --> 00:57:40,360
Speaker 2: Keeps changing? Haven't we? We've had different the time.

1213
00:57:40,520 --> 00:57:43,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm going to say what's today?

1214
00:57:43,080 --> 00:57:45,439
Speaker 4: I'm going to say carbonated?

1215
00:57:45,840 --> 00:57:48,720
Speaker 2: Oh, like I fought?

1216
00:57:50,720 --> 00:57:52,000
Speaker 5: Hey, you and Jad both.

1217
00:57:54,000 --> 00:57:58,200
Speaker 9: Come on bubbles like butterflies.

1218
00:57:58,520 --> 00:58:02,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, never know where I got where I stand in

1219
00:58:02,960 --> 00:58:03,640
Speaker 1: the bubble ground.

1220
00:58:04,040 --> 00:58:05,680
Speaker 2: And I would say, and I mean this in a

1221
00:58:05,720 --> 00:58:08,320
Speaker 2: really lovely way, Oh I do. I was gonna say

1222
00:58:08,360 --> 00:58:12,040
Speaker 2: solid solid, Yeah, it's not solid.

1223
00:58:12,320 --> 00:58:13,400
Speaker 3: I do use that for you too.

1224
00:58:13,560 --> 00:58:15,640
Speaker 5: Yeah, I wouldn't have guessed fat if you said that.

1225
00:58:15,680 --> 00:58:17,240
Speaker 5: I don't worry. I would have known what you meant.

1226
00:58:17,880 --> 00:58:20,120
Speaker 2: We rode from like farts to solid I was like,

1227
00:58:20,120 --> 00:58:21,040
Speaker 2: oh this toilet.

1228
00:58:21,880 --> 00:58:25,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, you kind of the opposite, you guys.

1229
00:58:25,040 --> 00:58:29,800
Speaker 4: Congratulations on the party and good luck number two.

1230
00:58:31,720 --> 00:58:35,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, fantastic, Thank you, lovely love