1 00:00:05,921 --> 00:00:13,401 Speaker 1: Appolochiae production an easier advice. Are you okay? What happened? 2 00:00:13,961 --> 00:00:16,601 Speaker 1: Promise it won't be too much? Bring it in. 3 00:00:17,921 --> 00:00:26,241 Speaker 2: Welcome to our Bestie segment. This is the place for you. 4 00:00:27,081 --> 00:00:30,561 Speaker 2: Welcome back to another beautiful Bestie episode segment. We have 5 00:00:30,721 --> 00:00:33,241 Speaker 2: a really interesting one for you today, and we're gonna 6 00:00:33,241 --> 00:00:34,880 Speaker 2: cut to the chase. We're gonna get straight into it. 7 00:00:35,001 --> 00:00:36,881 Speaker 2: So actually take it away. Let's go. 8 00:00:38,040 --> 00:00:40,520 Speaker 1: Okay, buckle up, because I've got a story that proves 9 00:00:40,561 --> 00:00:44,720 Speaker 1: sometimes your boyfriend isn't your boyfriend, he's just your scammer 10 00:00:44,760 --> 00:00:47,521 Speaker 1: with benefits. So picture this. I was with this guy 11 00:00:47,601 --> 00:00:50,441 Speaker 1: for seven years yep, seven years, long enough to get 12 00:00:50,441 --> 00:00:53,521 Speaker 1: a degree, a master's and maybe even a PhD. And 13 00:00:53,641 --> 00:00:56,281 Speaker 1: instead I earn nothing but trauma and a second hand 14 00:00:56,321 --> 00:00:59,361 Speaker 1: Louverton bag I never even got to touch. We started 15 00:00:59,361 --> 00:01:01,840 Speaker 1: as friends, it turned into something more, and then it 16 00:01:01,921 --> 00:01:05,881 Speaker 1: turned into well, basically a pyramid scheme with feeling. I 17 00:01:05,921 --> 00:01:08,521 Speaker 1: always had this little gut feeling something was off, but 18 00:01:08,561 --> 00:01:12,041 Speaker 1: I ignored it because love makes you dumb, like clinically dumb. 19 00:01:12,241 --> 00:01:16,000 Speaker 1: Oh honey. Fast forward, my friends start whispering that he's 20 00:01:16,041 --> 00:01:19,041 Speaker 1: actually taking money from me, my money and using it 21 00:01:19,041 --> 00:01:21,800 Speaker 1: to spoil other women, and not just like a cheeky 22 00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:22,520 Speaker 1: Maca's run. 23 00:01:22,640 --> 00:01:22,800 Speaker 2: No. 24 00:01:22,801 --> 00:01:25,641 Speaker 1: No, we're talking five star restaurants, cocktails, and the kind 25 00:01:25,640 --> 00:01:27,521 Speaker 1: of meals that don't come with a happy meal toy. 26 00:01:28,360 --> 00:01:31,160 Speaker 1: At first, I thought, there's no way he can't even 27 00:01:31,241 --> 00:01:33,481 Speaker 1: organize a root in a brothel. How is he organizing 28 00:01:33,481 --> 00:01:36,321 Speaker 1: dinner dates at fancy restaurants? Wow, this story's a lot, 29 00:01:36,401 --> 00:01:38,481 Speaker 1: This is a lot. But then another girl straight up 30 00:01:38,521 --> 00:01:40,960 Speaker 1: told one of my friends, Yeah, he buys me things, 31 00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:43,360 Speaker 1: and he buys me big things. She meant buys me 32 00:01:43,441 --> 00:01:47,281 Speaker 1: designer handbags with my money. So basically I wasn't the girlfriend. 33 00:01:47,321 --> 00:01:50,361 Speaker 1: I was the sponsor. He was living la vita loca 34 00:01:50,601 --> 00:01:52,921 Speaker 1: and I was footing the bill. Then I got ahold 35 00:01:52,961 --> 00:01:55,321 Speaker 1: of his bank statements, and babes looked less like a 36 00:01:55,321 --> 00:01:58,281 Speaker 1: financial record and more like a Louis Vuitton lay by plan. 37 00:01:58,761 --> 00:02:04,321 Speaker 1: Transaction after transaction to this one girl handbags, dinners, gifts. Meanwhile, 38 00:02:04,361 --> 00:02:06,281 Speaker 1: I couldn't even get to chip and for petrol without 39 00:02:06,321 --> 00:02:10,161 Speaker 1: a full blown argument. And here's the kicker. Turns out 40 00:02:10,241 --> 00:02:12,961 Speaker 1: I was basically feeding her child to another man. Like 41 00:02:13,041 --> 00:02:15,281 Speaker 1: not only was I a girlfriend and a sponsor apparently 42 00:02:15,361 --> 00:02:18,361 Speaker 1: I was also sent link. When I finally confronted him, 43 00:02:18,401 --> 00:02:20,841 Speaker 1: he admitted everything, which honestly I didn't know whether to 44 00:02:20,921 --> 00:02:23,441 Speaker 1: respect for the honesty or slap him for the audacity. 45 00:02:24,001 --> 00:02:26,681 Speaker 1: Obviously I ended things immediately, But here's a wild part. 46 00:02:26,921 --> 00:02:27,761 Speaker 1: They're still together. 47 00:02:28,161 --> 00:02:28,761 Speaker 2: Wow. 48 00:02:28,841 --> 00:02:31,081 Speaker 1: And I just have one question, how does she walk 49 00:02:31,081 --> 00:02:33,481 Speaker 1: around with those handbags? Because if I knew another woman 50 00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:36,321 Speaker 1: had basically bought my Louverton, I'd dissolve it into the 51 00:02:36,321 --> 00:02:39,000 Speaker 1: earth out of shame. But this girl, she struts around 52 00:02:39,041 --> 00:02:42,401 Speaker 1: like she's on the Paris runway. Girl, you're not carry Bradshaw, 53 00:02:42,441 --> 00:02:45,641 Speaker 1: You're carrying my visa bill. Anyways, that's one of my 54 00:02:45,721 --> 00:02:48,400 Speaker 1: fucked up stories. And trust me, I've got more. So yeah, 55 00:02:48,481 --> 00:02:51,001 Speaker 1: moral of the story. Trust you've got girls, Cancelor's card, 56 00:02:51,001 --> 00:02:53,201 Speaker 1: and remember sometimes you're not the girlfriend, you're just an 57 00:02:53,281 --> 00:02:54,441 Speaker 1: after pay with feelings. 58 00:02:54,641 --> 00:02:58,841 Speaker 2: Jesus. Firstly, you should be a writer, because that was 59 00:02:59,081 --> 00:03:00,001 Speaker 2: a wild story. 60 00:03:00,321 --> 00:03:03,240 Speaker 1: I don't know what to say. I mean your question 61 00:03:03,321 --> 00:03:05,401 Speaker 1: to ask is how does she walk around with these 62 00:03:05,441 --> 00:03:08,361 Speaker 1: Loui vitons. I don't know. I don't understand because I 63 00:03:08,401 --> 00:03:10,921 Speaker 1: just don't think I could be the other woman and 64 00:03:11,321 --> 00:03:13,201 Speaker 1: I would feel so bad if I'd known that this 65 00:03:13,281 --> 00:03:14,281 Speaker 1: had come from your money. 66 00:03:14,761 --> 00:03:16,441 Speaker 2: Does the other woman know that? Is that? 67 00:03:16,481 --> 00:03:18,120 Speaker 1: Like I said, yeah, because it was her friend? 68 00:03:18,520 --> 00:03:19,001 Speaker 2: Oh shit. 69 00:03:19,481 --> 00:03:21,441 Speaker 1: Yeah. Then the other girl straight up told me one 70 00:03:21,441 --> 00:03:23,800 Speaker 1: of my friends said, yeah, he buys me things, so's 71 00:03:23,800 --> 00:03:26,601 Speaker 1: someone she knows. That's I don't know, girl coach. For me, 72 00:03:26,641 --> 00:03:28,961 Speaker 1: I just wouldn't go there. Yeah, but I think for 73 00:03:29,041 --> 00:03:33,321 Speaker 1: you moving forward, like you have to fully unplug, energetically unplugged, 74 00:03:33,361 --> 00:03:36,361 Speaker 1: let go and listen. Yeah, like you've given advice here, 75 00:03:36,401 --> 00:03:38,401 Speaker 1: listened to your guard, look for those red flags. Your 76 00:03:38,401 --> 00:03:40,681 Speaker 1: body knows how your body tells you when something's not right. 77 00:03:40,921 --> 00:03:44,521 Speaker 2: Absolutely, and also it's super unfortunate. But also I can 78 00:03:44,561 --> 00:03:47,801 Speaker 2: hear that there's for valid reason you're allowed to be angry. Yeah, 79 00:03:47,801 --> 00:03:49,561 Speaker 2: but there's a lot of anger there and a lot 80 00:03:49,601 --> 00:03:51,401 Speaker 2: of resentment and a lot of like, oh my god, 81 00:03:51,441 --> 00:03:53,161 Speaker 2: this is exactly what happened to me. And it's like 82 00:03:53,241 --> 00:03:55,281 Speaker 2: sometimes you got to let that resentment go. Otherwise you're 83 00:03:55,321 --> 00:03:57,241 Speaker 2: just the person holding the burning rock. Yeah, and it 84 00:03:57,321 --> 00:03:59,721 Speaker 2: like only is going to impact you for future relationships. 85 00:03:59,921 --> 00:04:03,801 Speaker 1: Yeah, don't let this situation become your whole story. Yeah, 86 00:04:03,801 --> 00:04:05,601 Speaker 1: it's like a part of your story. It's a chapter 87 00:04:05,641 --> 00:04:07,881 Speaker 1: that you can close and move forward from. But I'd 88 00:04:07,921 --> 00:04:09,841 Speaker 1: be doing some breath work. I'd be doing whatever I 89 00:04:09,841 --> 00:04:11,361 Speaker 1: can to kind of move that anger and move that 90 00:04:11,481 --> 00:04:12,961 Speaker 1: energy out of my body, because you're right, it's just 91 00:04:13,001 --> 00:04:13,601 Speaker 1: gonna sit there. 92 00:04:13,641 --> 00:04:16,161 Speaker 2: Absolutely, And also as well, when things like this happen 93 00:04:16,161 --> 00:04:18,601 Speaker 2: and they're so far fetched from what you actually want 94 00:04:18,641 --> 00:04:22,761 Speaker 2: in a relationship, it's so easy to immediately lump the 95 00:04:22,801 --> 00:04:25,001 Speaker 2: whole opposite sex with that behavior. 96 00:04:25,121 --> 00:04:26,440 Speaker 1: You can kind of hear in that language. 97 00:04:26,561 --> 00:04:29,281 Speaker 2: Yeah, there's definitely like, oh, this is gonna better like this. 98 00:04:29,320 --> 00:04:31,161 Speaker 2: You shouldn't do this. Be careful because you're going to 99 00:04:31,241 --> 00:04:32,921 Speaker 2: have this happen to you as well. And I get 100 00:04:32,961 --> 00:04:35,441 Speaker 2: that again, you're allowed to be angry, but be mindful 101 00:04:35,440 --> 00:04:36,640 Speaker 2: of the part of you that wants to take this 102 00:04:36,761 --> 00:04:39,441 Speaker 2: story and make it, you know, attach it to men 103 00:04:39,761 --> 00:04:42,561 Speaker 2: as a whole, as opposed to this being just one experience, 104 00:04:42,601 --> 00:04:44,721 Speaker 2: because otherwise that's going to ruin every other relationship that 105 00:04:44,761 --> 00:04:47,281 Speaker 2: you have too. And also, if you're not mindful, you'll 106 00:04:47,281 --> 00:04:49,121 Speaker 2: take all the beliefs that you have from this experience, 107 00:04:49,161 --> 00:04:51,921 Speaker 2: which is a very extreme experience in your case, common No, 108 00:04:52,001 --> 00:04:53,640 Speaker 2: it's not common. You're not gonna have that with everyone, 109 00:04:53,641 --> 00:04:55,841 Speaker 2: but you might bring that in. It's likely that you 110 00:04:55,880 --> 00:04:58,001 Speaker 2: will leak that into every other area. 111 00:04:57,681 --> 00:05:00,121 Speaker 1: Like trust you about Cancelor's card. Do you remember sometimes 112 00:05:00,121 --> 00:05:03,440 Speaker 1: you're not a girlfriend, you're just after paid with feelings. Yeah, 113 00:05:03,681 --> 00:05:06,681 Speaker 1: it's a very unform watunate rare. I don't think this 114 00:05:06,721 --> 00:05:08,961 Speaker 1: would be something that happens often and not all many 115 00:05:08,961 --> 00:05:10,481 Speaker 1: are going to treat you like this, And now you 116 00:05:10,561 --> 00:05:12,681 Speaker 1: know different things to look out with and to have 117 00:05:12,721 --> 00:05:15,641 Speaker 1: full transparency and open conversations. 118 00:05:14,921 --> 00:05:18,801 Speaker 2: And even boundaries around what you will give and you 119 00:05:18,841 --> 00:05:19,880 Speaker 2: know what that will look like. 120 00:05:20,161 --> 00:05:22,281 Speaker 1: Yeah, you know you said you felt something was always 121 00:05:22,320 --> 00:05:25,281 Speaker 1: off along the way. That was your guy intuition speaking 122 00:05:25,361 --> 00:05:27,441 Speaker 1: to you. So just like, investigate that more next time. 123 00:05:27,721 --> 00:05:29,721 Speaker 1: Sometimes you don't even know what's off, but your body's 124 00:05:29,721 --> 00:05:31,561 Speaker 1: just telling you it's not okay. Listen to that. And 125 00:05:31,561 --> 00:05:34,041 Speaker 1: that's okay to walk away from something or someone if 126 00:05:34,041 --> 00:05:35,681 Speaker 1: you don't just know that they're not right for you. 127 00:05:36,401 --> 00:05:39,841 Speaker 2: Oh, this happened, honestly, I'm really definitely true. It's not 128 00:05:39,841 --> 00:05:42,321 Speaker 2: something that I would wish upon anyone. What you've been through, 129 00:05:42,440 --> 00:05:44,520 Speaker 2: like the feelings, the emotions, how that would have left 130 00:05:44,561 --> 00:05:47,241 Speaker 2: you feeling I just can't even imagine. So I'm sorry 131 00:05:47,241 --> 00:05:49,241 Speaker 2: to hear that that's what you went through, But betrayal, 132 00:05:49,401 --> 00:05:51,281 Speaker 2: I think you get to determine whether this is going 133 00:05:51,320 --> 00:05:53,001 Speaker 2: to be your story moving forward or not. You have 134 00:05:53,121 --> 00:05:54,201 Speaker 2: ultimate control over that. 135 00:05:54,440 --> 00:05:56,760 Speaker 1: Definitely sending you lots of love and thank you for 136 00:05:56,801 --> 00:05:59,080 Speaker 1: sending this in it's a wild one. I can't believe 137 00:05:59,121 --> 00:06:00,761 Speaker 1: that I was sending you lots of love and wish 138 00:06:00,761 --> 00:06:02,921 Speaker 1: you're all the best with your future partner who's going 139 00:06:02,921 --> 00:06:04,401 Speaker 1: to treat you like the queen that you deserve to 140 00:06:04,401 --> 00:06:07,041 Speaker 1: be treated like. Absolutely Bye, guys, have seen next episode 141 00:06:13,880 --> 00:06:14,200 Speaker 2: MHM