1 00:00:05,720 --> 00:00:09,120 Speaker 1: Everyone, It's Cully Taylor here for this week's Mojo Monday. 2 00:00:09,880 --> 00:00:12,560 Speaker 1: So I'm sure most of you, like me, have a 3 00:00:12,600 --> 00:00:16,440 Speaker 1: few regrets. You know, things that you wish you hadn't 4 00:00:16,480 --> 00:00:19,200 Speaker 1: said or done, or things you wish you had said 5 00:00:19,280 --> 00:00:24,200 Speaker 1: or done, or moments where you reacted instead of responding, 6 00:00:24,320 --> 00:00:27,440 Speaker 1: and choices that you know may have cost you something. 7 00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:30,040 Speaker 1: You know that could be big or it could be small. 8 00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:33,920 Speaker 1: But regret is part of being human, you know. Regret 9 00:00:34,040 --> 00:00:38,519 Speaker 1: tells us that we care. It tells us that something mattered, 10 00:00:39,479 --> 00:00:42,400 Speaker 1: and they're different patht what pathways that lead us there? 11 00:00:42,479 --> 00:00:47,000 Speaker 1: You know, Alcohol, of course, can lower the brain's executive function. 12 00:00:47,400 --> 00:00:53,160 Speaker 1: Heighten emotion can do something similar fear, anger, hurt, even excitement, 13 00:00:53,640 --> 00:00:57,200 Speaker 1: And when emotions surge, our nervous system ends up driving 14 00:00:57,240 --> 00:01:00,440 Speaker 1: the bus. And in those moments we can do things 15 00:01:00,440 --> 00:01:03,680 Speaker 1: that we normally wouldn't choose to do. So think of 16 00:01:03,800 --> 00:01:07,319 Speaker 1: something that you regret in your life. So maybe it 17 00:01:07,520 --> 00:01:10,959 Speaker 1: led to a loss, could have been a friendship, a partner, 18 00:01:11,120 --> 00:01:17,360 Speaker 1: trusting someone trusting you, an opportunity, money, And when you 19 00:01:17,400 --> 00:01:21,920 Speaker 1: revisit it, does your body respond, Like does your heartbeat 20 00:01:22,120 --> 00:01:25,440 Speaker 1: a little bit faster? Do you start to kind of 21 00:01:25,440 --> 00:01:28,920 Speaker 1: beat yourself up about it. Because our minds are so 22 00:01:29,200 --> 00:01:35,000 Speaker 1: powerful they replay moments vividly. The body responds as if 23 00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:38,400 Speaker 1: it's happening right now. And this is why I want 24 00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:41,120 Speaker 1: to offer a different lens when it comes to regret. 25 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:44,759 Speaker 1: So instead of using regret as a weapon to beat 26 00:01:44,800 --> 00:01:48,360 Speaker 1: yourself up with, what if he used it as a teacher. 27 00:01:49,280 --> 00:01:52,680 Speaker 1: So the Stoics spoke about wisdom as a virtue. So 28 00:01:52,760 --> 00:01:56,320 Speaker 1: that doesn't mean we're not talking about intelligence, but talking 29 00:01:56,360 --> 00:02:01,000 Speaker 1: more about discernment, which is the ability to make why decisions, 30 00:02:01,040 --> 00:02:05,800 Speaker 1: to see clearly, to understand the consequences, and to align 31 00:02:05,840 --> 00:02:11,280 Speaker 1: our actions with character, to act with intention. So when 32 00:02:11,320 --> 00:02:14,080 Speaker 1: I look back at the things that I regret, I 33 00:02:14,080 --> 00:02:17,240 Speaker 1: can see that I didn't yet have that wisdom, that 34 00:02:17,400 --> 00:02:20,800 Speaker 1: awareness that I have more of now. I didn't have 35 00:02:20,880 --> 00:02:25,519 Speaker 1: the distance between thought and action that I'm able to 36 00:02:25,760 --> 00:02:30,120 Speaker 1: create now, And that perspective can turn down the voice 37 00:02:30,120 --> 00:02:34,440 Speaker 1: of regret. It certainly doesn't excuse behavior, but it puts 38 00:02:34,480 --> 00:02:38,639 Speaker 1: it into context. So I'm the same person, but I'm 39 00:02:38,639 --> 00:02:42,760 Speaker 1: not the same version of me. I do feel now 40 00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:46,360 Speaker 1: that I'm more self aware, more intentional, more aligned with 41 00:02:46,440 --> 00:02:50,160 Speaker 1: who I stand for, and how much we have grown 42 00:02:50,440 --> 00:02:54,959 Speaker 1: often becomes clearer when we compare who we were then 43 00:02:55,160 --> 00:02:59,440 Speaker 1: to who we are now, and heartiness gives us a 44 00:02:59,560 --> 00:03:04,800 Speaker 1: useful lens heres so hardiness the four pillars of hardiness, 45 00:03:04,919 --> 00:03:09,400 Speaker 1: which are commitment, control, challenge, and connection. So regret can 46 00:03:09,480 --> 00:03:12,440 Speaker 1: fuel our commitment, our commitment to becoming the kind of 47 00:03:12,480 --> 00:03:17,800 Speaker 1: person who acts with intention. It strengthens control, recognizing that 48 00:03:17,880 --> 00:03:20,600 Speaker 1: while we can't change the past, we can change how 49 00:03:20,639 --> 00:03:26,280 Speaker 1: we respond to our circumstances now, and it can reframe challenge. 50 00:03:26,400 --> 00:03:30,920 Speaker 1: So seeing uncomfortable moments as training for our character, and 51 00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:35,920 Speaker 1: it deepens our connection because when we own our missteps, 52 00:03:36,280 --> 00:03:41,800 Speaker 1: when we take responsibility, relationships can often strengthen. So we 53 00:03:41,840 --> 00:03:45,720 Speaker 1: can't develop wisdom through a perfect life. It's really forged 54 00:03:45,760 --> 00:03:49,560 Speaker 1: in those uncomfortable moments. So if there's something that you 55 00:03:49,640 --> 00:03:52,360 Speaker 1: were still holding on to, whether it's from last week, 56 00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:56,000 Speaker 1: or last year or years ago, take a deep breath 57 00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:59,720 Speaker 1: and then ask yourself, who was I in that moment? 58 00:04:00,400 --> 00:04:03,720 Speaker 1: So what was driving me? Was it fear or insecurity 59 00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:10,120 Speaker 1: or selfishness? What skill was missing? And what value did 60 00:04:10,160 --> 00:04:14,000 Speaker 1: I step away from? And then you can ask who 61 00:04:14,040 --> 00:04:19,080 Speaker 1: do I want to be next time? Intentional, connected, grounded wise, 62 00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:24,320 Speaker 1: because regret becomes powerful when it becomes a lesson learn 63 00:04:24,680 --> 00:04:27,640 Speaker 1: on this journey of life that we're on. So give 64 00:04:27,680 --> 00:04:33,240 Speaker 1: yourself permission to grow past old versions of yourself. And 65 00:04:33,279 --> 00:04:37,080 Speaker 1: that's perhaps where regret. What regret is offering, it's an 66 00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:42,240 Speaker 1: invitation to grow and move forward. So that's it for 67 00:04:42,279 --> 00:04:45,359 Speaker 1: today's Mojo Monday. I hope you all have a great 68 00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:47,800 Speaker 1: week everyone, and I will catch you next week.