1 00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:03,120 Speaker 1: This is the Fitting in with Kate Richie podcast. 2 00:00:03,320 --> 00:00:05,560 Speaker 2: It's talk about red flags because just spend a debate 3 00:00:05,600 --> 00:00:08,280 Speaker 2: online about this one. And to the person who wrote 4 00:00:08,280 --> 00:00:10,360 Speaker 2: this article on The Daily Mal, I just thought I'd 5 00:00:10,800 --> 00:00:12,320 Speaker 2: ask you to think about your word and I'll just 6 00:00:12,360 --> 00:00:16,239 Speaker 2: read this bit the part the post sparked mixed reactions 7 00:00:16,280 --> 00:00:18,920 Speaker 2: with some reckoning photos should be deleted. 8 00:00:20,160 --> 00:00:25,000 Speaker 3: Reckoning? Wow, good luck reckoning? 9 00:00:25,200 --> 00:00:25,520 Speaker 4: Correct? 10 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:31,360 Speaker 3: Terrible English? Yes, terrible Chrissy Swan reckoning. 11 00:00:31,440 --> 00:00:35,080 Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, I thought, well reckoning is it's the it's 12 00:00:35,120 --> 00:00:38,280 Speaker 4: a day of reckoning day. I thought if it was 13 00:00:38,280 --> 00:00:42,680 Speaker 4: in a if a relationship movie tail you would think 14 00:00:42,720 --> 00:00:45,120 Speaker 4: of it could be the ex's. 15 00:00:44,800 --> 00:00:45,680 Speaker 3: Day of readoning. 16 00:00:45,720 --> 00:00:48,800 Speaker 2: Well, this is talking about all those great fun photos 17 00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:51,599 Speaker 2: we have in our photo reel, but maybe also on 18 00:00:51,640 --> 00:00:54,760 Speaker 2: social media of past lovers and the debate of whether 19 00:00:55,360 --> 00:00:58,560 Speaker 2: you should delete all those photos when you have a 20 00:00:58,600 --> 00:01:03,240 Speaker 2: new partner discuss It's an interesting one because, I mean, 21 00:01:03,280 --> 00:01:05,279 Speaker 2: the experts come out and said, what about the ninety 22 00:01:05,360 --> 00:01:07,680 Speaker 2: ten yearl Will you delete about ninety percent and keep 23 00:01:07,760 --> 00:01:11,959 Speaker 2: ten just because it seems strange to remove an entire past? 24 00:01:12,480 --> 00:01:15,840 Speaker 5: What about you delete none? I agree, grow up and 25 00:01:16,040 --> 00:01:20,840 Speaker 5: realize that your current boyfriend or girlfriend isn't the first 26 00:01:20,959 --> 00:01:25,520 Speaker 5: person you've ever known? Amazing, have zero tolerance for that, 27 00:01:25,880 --> 00:01:29,399 Speaker 5: agree and that is a red flag. If anyone ever 28 00:01:29,480 --> 00:01:35,280 Speaker 5: said to me, you can't speak to your my very 29 00:01:35,360 --> 00:01:39,319 Speaker 5: first you know love, My first boyfriend, Darren I was 30 00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:40,440 Speaker 5: with for eight years. 31 00:01:40,520 --> 00:01:43,160 Speaker 3: Lee institution is here? 32 00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:43,960 Speaker 4: Where is he? 33 00:01:44,840 --> 00:01:46,920 Speaker 3: What mental institution is he in? 34 00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:47,240 Speaker 5: Now? 35 00:01:47,520 --> 00:01:47,800 Speaker 4: Just me? 36 00:01:48,160 --> 00:01:55,600 Speaker 5: It is a prison and he's you know, he's slowly 37 00:01:55,840 --> 00:01:57,480 Speaker 5: digging when the guards aren't looking on. 38 00:01:58,480 --> 00:02:00,440 Speaker 3: So you're still in contact with him as a friend 39 00:02:00,480 --> 00:02:00,880 Speaker 3: of yours. 40 00:02:00,960 --> 00:02:02,720 Speaker 5: I talk to him all the time. He's one of 41 00:02:02,720 --> 00:02:08,520 Speaker 5: my favorite human beings because we shared eight years together 42 00:02:08,600 --> 00:02:11,560 Speaker 5: from the age of twenty to twenty eight, massive time 43 00:02:11,600 --> 00:02:14,359 Speaker 5: in our life. Can I ask this question if somebody 44 00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:17,119 Speaker 5: ever said to me you can't be friends with him, 45 00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:19,480 Speaker 5: it just wouldn't be a choice. 46 00:02:19,560 --> 00:02:21,800 Speaker 3: I'd just be like, well, you're and it doesn't make sense. 47 00:02:22,639 --> 00:02:25,600 Speaker 3: Do you talk about old times? Do you do? 48 00:02:25,639 --> 00:02:25,760 Speaker 5: You? 49 00:02:26,040 --> 00:02:28,919 Speaker 3: Do? You do you talk about things that happened back then? 50 00:02:28,960 --> 00:02:33,240 Speaker 2: And do you have private jokes that they still exist? 51 00:02:33,800 --> 00:02:36,359 Speaker 5: I mean probably, Yeah, he's like my brother. 52 00:02:36,639 --> 00:02:38,320 Speaker 3: Okay, did you have brother? 53 00:02:38,360 --> 00:02:41,760 Speaker 4: I mean, can I can I ask a very personal 54 00:02:41,880 --> 00:02:43,080 Speaker 4: question please was her? 55 00:02:43,320 --> 00:02:45,120 Speaker 3: Was he your first one? Interesting? 56 00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:50,320 Speaker 4: Yeah, because I think that adds that there's even more 57 00:02:50,400 --> 00:02:51,280 Speaker 4: connection then. 58 00:02:52,400 --> 00:02:52,640 Speaker 1: Yeah. 59 00:02:52,680 --> 00:02:55,240 Speaker 3: Maybe I don't know because it's a shit. 60 00:02:55,919 --> 00:02:59,080 Speaker 5: I just don't and I am not a jealous person 61 00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:02,200 Speaker 5: and I can't know people that are. 62 00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:06,120 Speaker 3: What should you do? Do you have to delete those photos? 63 00:03:06,200 --> 00:03:07,520 Speaker 3: Or can you let them sit there and tell the 64 00:03:07,560 --> 00:03:09,799 Speaker 3: other person just to get over it? Clear and ride? 65 00:03:09,840 --> 00:03:10,519 Speaker 3: What are you thinking? 66 00:03:11,600 --> 00:03:16,239 Speaker 1: Hi? Well, I would say one of the biggest red 67 00:03:16,280 --> 00:03:22,160 Speaker 1: flags live encounters would be just like blow texting and 68 00:03:22,320 --> 00:03:24,760 Speaker 1: just like a really long replies, like really like just 69 00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:28,400 Speaker 1: how almost like the ghost in you you're holding on 70 00:03:28,480 --> 00:03:31,720 Speaker 1: to do your life with the relationships like you said 71 00:03:31,760 --> 00:03:35,400 Speaker 1: it going? Do you not if one. 72 00:03:35,240 --> 00:03:37,840 Speaker 3: Person's giving too much more than the other person? 73 00:03:37,880 --> 00:03:40,160 Speaker 1: You mean, yeah, yeah, but then they can turn around 74 00:03:40,160 --> 00:03:41,440 Speaker 1: to you and be like, no, no, no, it's all good. 75 00:03:42,240 --> 00:03:43,520 Speaker 1: I'm just that with the boys. 76 00:03:43,720 --> 00:03:46,920 Speaker 2: Yeah. Okay, when you look back over a chain of 77 00:03:46,960 --> 00:03:50,560 Speaker 2: texts and you see only one color always interesting, Yeah, 78 00:03:51,040 --> 00:03:53,720 Speaker 2: that's slightly concerning, Thank you, Claire. Would you be okay 79 00:03:53,760 --> 00:03:55,640 Speaker 2: with you know, if you met somebody and they had 80 00:03:55,680 --> 00:03:56,360 Speaker 2: photos of their. 81 00:03:56,280 --> 00:04:00,120 Speaker 1: Ex on their phone or like Instagram. 82 00:04:00,160 --> 00:04:03,920 Speaker 3: Maybe on instag so it's public, you know what I'm like. 83 00:04:04,000 --> 00:04:06,560 Speaker 1: If they're just following them, that's fine. I don't mind. 84 00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:08,880 Speaker 1: If it was like, if it was an okay thing, 85 00:04:08,920 --> 00:04:10,960 Speaker 1: they didn't bake up like that, that's thank you. 86 00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:13,640 Speaker 2: Clar Swanny a friend of mine. I mean, he's as 87 00:04:14,160 --> 00:04:17,760 Speaker 2: an older guy. He has got a photo on his mantelpiece. 88 00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:22,919 Speaker 2: His right arm is over his previous wife and his 89 00:04:23,080 --> 00:04:28,279 Speaker 2: left arm is over his current wife. And they're all 90 00:04:28,320 --> 00:04:31,240 Speaker 2: wearing like cable knit jumpers. 91 00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:37,960 Speaker 3: What cable knit jumpers? I believe? 92 00:04:38,160 --> 00:04:38,240 Speaker 5: So? 93 00:04:38,920 --> 00:04:41,640 Speaker 4: Is there also a painting of the grandfather up on 94 00:04:41,680 --> 00:04:43,400 Speaker 4: the wall that made the family. 95 00:04:43,440 --> 00:04:46,920 Speaker 3: Hard to say? Mate? Rebecca in Springwood? Hello, did the 96 00:04:46,960 --> 00:04:51,200 Speaker 3: eyes of that portrait they actually come out of the picture? 97 00:04:51,320 --> 00:04:54,000 Speaker 3: And we'll follow you down the street? Sorry, Beck? Beck? 98 00:04:54,040 --> 00:04:55,359 Speaker 3: Do you think they should be able to hold on 99 00:04:55,440 --> 00:04:57,040 Speaker 3: the photos? Do you think that's fine? 100 00:04:57,640 --> 00:04:57,839 Speaker 5: Yeah? 101 00:04:57,920 --> 00:04:59,440 Speaker 1: I think it's really fine. Should be able to hold 102 00:04:59,440 --> 00:05:01,320 Speaker 1: onto them. Probably just don't want to be looking at 103 00:05:01,320 --> 00:05:03,320 Speaker 1: them all the time. But you don't want to delete 104 00:05:03,360 --> 00:05:04,840 Speaker 1: your past in your history. 105 00:05:05,040 --> 00:05:06,240 Speaker 3: Do you know what? Can I ask this? Beck? 106 00:05:06,279 --> 00:05:08,520 Speaker 2: Have you ever been in a situation where you're telling 107 00:05:08,520 --> 00:05:11,240 Speaker 2: a story about something and your partner is there, but 108 00:05:11,279 --> 00:05:13,159 Speaker 2: then you realize that it wasn't. Then you did it 109 00:05:13,200 --> 00:05:14,480 Speaker 2: with I've done that before. 110 00:05:15,680 --> 00:05:17,240 Speaker 1: I don't know about that one. I've been with my 111 00:05:17,279 --> 00:05:20,000 Speaker 1: partner too long now, but yeah, No. 112 00:05:20,080 --> 00:05:22,560 Speaker 2: I was sitting there at a family dinner telling a 113 00:05:22,560 --> 00:05:24,640 Speaker 2: story about when Lisa and I did this, and Mum's 114 00:05:24,640 --> 00:05:26,560 Speaker 2: looking at me in a weird way and think, what 115 00:05:26,600 --> 00:05:27,640 Speaker 2: are you looking at? 116 00:05:27,839 --> 00:05:31,040 Speaker 3: And she's doing the old cut across the throat and 117 00:05:31,080 --> 00:05:34,080 Speaker 3: she's mouthing to me it wasn't Lisa, Oh, I know 118 00:05:34,440 --> 00:05:37,560 Speaker 3: it was. It was Lisa's roast lamb. It was it 119 00:05:37,600 --> 00:05:39,400 Speaker 3: was old and I wasn't the food. It had nothing 120 00:05:39,400 --> 00:05:40,840 Speaker 3: to do with the cooking. It was just I had 121 00:05:40,839 --> 00:05:43,159 Speaker 3: the wrong person. It was a really great moment for everyone. 122 00:05:43,279 --> 00:05:46,520 Speaker 2: It's whippa was Kate Ritchie is a Nova podcast walk 123 00:05:46,560 --> 00:05:47,560 Speaker 2: great shows like this. 124 00:05:47,880 --> 00:05:51,360 Speaker 3: Download the Nova Player, find the app store or Google Playing.