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Speaker 1: This is the Fits In with Kate Richie podcast, talking

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Speaker 1: about signs that you should just be single, because I

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Speaker 1: think in life we all think that we need to

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Speaker 1: be in a relationship. Well maybe maybe you're going to

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Speaker 1: be happier if you're happy in a relationship. You know

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Speaker 1: it's not okay shit.

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Speaker 2: The answer, well, I think if you're looking.

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Speaker 1: For external validation and happiness from outside oneself, that is

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Speaker 1: all said, Yeah, that's you're never going to find it.

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Speaker 3: Society has moved on in that sense where you don't

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Speaker 3: have to I mean, it doesn't a unity doesn't mean

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Speaker 3: that you have to sign a piece of paper and

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Speaker 3: get married. And I think people who have been married

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Speaker 3: multiple times now are like, well, why can't we just

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Speaker 3: be together? Why do we have to friends? I mean

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Speaker 3: I had a mate that wanted to marry his wife

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Speaker 3: and she said, well we don't. It doesn't bother me,

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Speaker 3: like I don't need it to be official. And then

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Speaker 3: he got a job in LA and they moved over there.

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Speaker 3: In the only way that she could go over with

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Speaker 3: him is if she got a green card, so she

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Speaker 3: had to marry tonight.

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Speaker 1: Really got her over the line. There's this like a

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Speaker 1: social psychologist she's come out and she said, look, it's okay.

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Speaker 1: You know, some people who are single are just happier generally.

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Speaker 1: Stats say that you have more kind of friends, that

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Speaker 1: you socialize with your family, you have better relationships with

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Speaker 1: your parents and things like that. So there are some.

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Speaker 1: There's a little list here reach well, coming.

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Speaker 3: Home from work and knowing that the house is to yourself.

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Speaker 2: Let it out, let it out. But you know what

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Speaker 2: when you were at home by yourself. And I have

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Speaker 2: thought about this because once in ten years I reckon

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Speaker 2: Lisa and the kids were away for a night and

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Speaker 2: I had the place to myself in my mind, oh,

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Speaker 2: and this is heaven for about three minutes, and then

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Speaker 2: I went, no one's listening to me. There's no one

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Speaker 2: to annoy, and you don't even got pet, not done

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Speaker 2: a paper.

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Speaker 1: It is nice, though, isn't it When you come maybe

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Speaker 1: even on a Friday night, and you come home and

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Speaker 1: the lot there aren't any lights on in the house silent,

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Speaker 1: and it's really silent. You you walk around the house

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Speaker 1: and no one's there.

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Speaker 2: And what about when you go, hello, just checking, but

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Speaker 2: only they weren't.

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Speaker 1: Oh you're scared. Do you check under the.

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Speaker 3: Beds and there's a knock on the door and twenty

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Speaker 3: of your mates.

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Speaker 1: Here's your list. You're happier when you're single. Single life

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Speaker 1: is your happy place. So maybe if you've been in

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Speaker 1: relationships before and you're just generally not it's not ticking

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Speaker 1: the boxes for you. So maybe you just feel happier

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Speaker 1: when you're on your own. Your cherish your freedom. You

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Speaker 1: feel more sexually satisfied by yourself.

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Speaker 2: What e Well, that's number three on the list, getting

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Speaker 2: to know yourself.

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Speaker 1: You savor your solitude, that's what you're talking about. Fits

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Speaker 1: being able to have a bit of time to yourself.

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Speaker 3: Tommy Savory solitude quite a bit when he was a teenager.

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Speaker 3: Oh poor solitude, Yes, absolutely limited to.

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Speaker 1: You felt relieved when a romance ended, So you feel

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Speaker 1: like huge, thanks relief. Why are you doing that the

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Speaker 1: Brisbane reception?

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Speaker 3: All right mate, it's move on.

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Speaker 2: That is not that's anything else.

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Speaker 3: That's a relation.

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Speaker 2: What about the girl that shaved her head? Is that

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Speaker 2: a relief?

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Speaker 1: When have you happier in relationships or not?

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Speaker 3: Tom me?

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Speaker 2: You question for you? Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Absolutely, if you're happy.

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Speaker 2: Very happy, hands up, Sorry I couldn't be happier. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: so the hands are.

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Speaker 3: All they're all just helping me put that up.

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Speaker 2: But case the videos running your hands up.

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Speaker 3: It's a totally it's a totally different lifestyle. And this

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Speaker 3: is the thing. When you find someone that you love

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Speaker 3: and you move in with each other, what freaks you

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Speaker 3: out is you're like, oh my god, I don't have

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Speaker 3: that freedom anymore to be by myself, you know what

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Speaker 3: I mean? Or that I want to do well, you should.

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Speaker 1: Probably set aside some time to be able to, you know,

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Speaker 1: hang out on your own as well.

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Speaker 3: I think you always want the other life. You always

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Speaker 3: crave the other life because you can't have it.

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Speaker 1: The grass is always greener kind of thing, is it?

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Speaker 3: Yes?

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Speaker 2: You know, you might get there and realize the bushfire

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Speaker 2: has just gone through there and the whole place is charcoal.

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Speaker 2: Good one, thank you. Do you know what's missing? I

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Speaker 2: think in a lot of can I be selfish and

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Speaker 2: speak on behalf of men? Do you know what's missing?

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Speaker 2: A lot from a man's life.

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Speaker 1: At the moment, Oh, here we go.

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Speaker 2: It's sitting at the bar and having a jar with

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Speaker 2: a mate. You can still do this, yes you can,

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Speaker 2: but it's it's harder and harder to coordinate, and it's

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Speaker 2: extremely therapeutic for a man to sit next to another

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Speaker 2: man and have a beer without eye contact and talk.

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Speaker 1: Or even just talk. You don't need to have a beer,

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Speaker 1: you're dead right.

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Speaker 2: Have a soda water possible.

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Speaker 1: You have to drink to talk.

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Speaker 3: You know he's having that beer, right. But back in

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Speaker 3: the old days you never plan to have a big nye. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: and then it's all it's spontaneous. One more it fits, so, yeah,

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Speaker 3: you'd be down the pub. Yeah, you're having a great time.

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Speaker 3: That's a funny story. Mart I haven't caught you up.

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Speaker 3: I haven't caught up with you for a while. Why

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Speaker 3: don't we go to another pub next thing?

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Speaker 2: You know?

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Speaker 3: It's two You get your arms around each other, laughing

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Speaker 3: about the hour days.

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Speaker 1: And no one's calling you to wonder where you are?

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Speaker 1: What you mean, where are you? You said you'd be

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Speaker 1: home hours ago.

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Speaker 2: Four girls do the same thing, but wander through a

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Speaker 2: field and pick a daisy or something.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, you're sick.

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Speaker 2: Whistle a song or whatever you do. But a look

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Speaker 2: at materials and dresses and stuff.

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Speaker 1: Guess what we're going to do? Life improver next? You

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Speaker 1: know what would improve my.

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Speaker 2: Life's whipper with Kate Ritchie is a nov podcast walk

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Speaker 2: great shows like this. Download the Nova player, Fire the

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Speaker 2: app store, or Google playing a player