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Speaker 1: A good team. I hope you're bloody terrific. Welcome to

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Speaker 1: another installing the You project. And when I say that

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Speaker 1: you project, I'm going to put a little asterisk next

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Speaker 1: to that and say kinder kinder. The reason I say

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Speaker 1: kinder is because the brilliant, handsome, devastatingly talented Andrew May

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Speaker 1: of the Performance Intelligence podcast he and I got together

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Speaker 1: last week. We did a chat. We had a chat.

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Speaker 1: Officially it was me on his show, but because I'm

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Speaker 1: wildly lazy, I went, fucking he fuck, what if we

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Speaker 1: do what us podcast is call a co share and

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Speaker 1: we will share that conversation here at camp typ So

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Speaker 1: that's what we're doing. So Andrew and I had Mazie,

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Speaker 1: as his friends call him, Mazie and I had a

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Speaker 1: good chat about the concept of well, we spoke about

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Speaker 1: success broadly, but we spoke about fame. We spoke about

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Speaker 1: people's desire for attention and to be famous and be

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Speaker 1: seen and be wanted and all of those things, and

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Speaker 1: the idea of becoming an overnight success, which really, you know,

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Speaker 1: there's so many moving past that, so many variables about that.

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Speaker 1: And I think the title of his show was something

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Speaker 1: like becoming an overnight success in twenty years or something

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Speaker 1: something like that. But anyway, we had a really good

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Speaker 1: chat and I thought I would share that chat with

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Speaker 1: you today. So hope you're good. Hope you're enjoying the

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Speaker 1: start of your week if you're listening to this on

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Speaker 1: the day that it is released, which is a Monday,

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Speaker 1: which is August eighteen, the first August eighteen, twenty twenty

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Speaker 1: five we've ever had. So if it is that day

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Speaker 1: for you, it might be the day you do something special.

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Speaker 1: You've had lots of Mondays, but you've never had this one,

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Speaker 1: as Craig Harp says, or whatever day it is, enjoy

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Speaker 1: I hope you get something out of it. And love

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Speaker 1: your collective guts is love jumbo.

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Speaker 2: In our modern landscape, we celebrate when somebody goes viral,

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Speaker 2: but what happens when you do and nothing changes?

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Speaker 1: Today?

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Speaker 2: I with Craig Harper, effectingly known as Harps, one of

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Speaker 2: Australia's leading performance coaches and host of the You Project podcast.

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Speaker 2: Harps is over forty years of experience working across elite sport, media,

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Speaker 2: health and professional development. Now, most overnight successes are the

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Speaker 2: final scene of a long unseen grind but the public

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Speaker 2: only sees the climax and not the climb. I've got

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Speaker 2: a question for you, Craig Harper in welcoming you back

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Speaker 2: to the podcast for multiple times, what are your thoughts

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Speaker 2: on an overnight success?

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Speaker 1: Hi, mate, good to be back. You sound very very

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Speaker 1: professional straight out of the gate. I better try to

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Speaker 1: live up to that. I can do.

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Speaker 2: Get a harps, mate, how you're going like, yeah, let's

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Speaker 2: talk about the weather.

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Speaker 1: Well, that's what you were like before you press the go.

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Speaker 1: But then all of a sudden, I've got summer radio.

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Speaker 2: He's put on podcast voice. He's not saying fuck who.

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Speaker 1: He's gone from moccasins and bloody army shorts to three

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Speaker 1: piece suit. Yeah. That's a good question. I mean, it

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Speaker 1: depends on how you define success. And you know, we

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Speaker 1: know people blow up for somebody who does a video,

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Speaker 1: they blow up, they go viral. I don't know why

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Speaker 1: this person comes to mind. I don't even know if

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Speaker 1: you remember this, but you know Huck Tour girl, you

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Speaker 1: know that girl that I do remember her? Yes? Ah,

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Speaker 1: you gotta give him that huck top on that NNE. Yeah. Right,

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Speaker 1: So we won't talk about the origin story of what

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Speaker 1: she was talking about but you know, she did a grab.

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Speaker 1: Somebody asked her a question and the answer to that

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Speaker 1: and that subsequent little kind of exchange was videoed when

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Speaker 1: nuts and so she Depending on what your KPIs are

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Speaker 1: for success, you will say she was an overnight success.

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Speaker 1: She went from from zero to hero in some ways,

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Speaker 1: and from making no dough to making lots of dough.

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Speaker 1: But I think there was maybe a subsequent, almost as

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Speaker 1: rapid decline. I'm not sure. So for me, success is

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Speaker 1: really how someone is over the long term, and it

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Speaker 1: may or may not have to do with anything commercial.

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Speaker 2: I've got another one for you. Do you remember Corey Worthington.

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Speaker 1: I was at that kind of party, kid or something

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Speaker 1: that not.

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Speaker 2: Twenty sixteen, Layla McKinnon on The Current Affair did an interview.

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Speaker 2: He had those yellow sunglasses. I can still remember Laylah saying,

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Speaker 2: take those sunglasses off. And he's saying, why why should.

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Speaker 1: I take a few glasses and apologize to us. I'll say, sorry,

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Speaker 1: but I'm not taking all my glasses. Why not because

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Speaker 1: they're famous?

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Speaker 2: Because your glasses are famous. So he was a household

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Speaker 2: name for a couple of weeks. His parents went away.

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Speaker 2: He had a party. He had his fifteen minutes of fame.

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Speaker 2: Here is massive. I've done a Google search. He's not

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Speaker 2: doing a hell of a lot. I mean that with respect,

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Speaker 2: but you know you look at that. That had millions,

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Speaker 2: hundreds of millions of clicks and downloads. So it was

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Speaker 2: just about going viral like that would set you up

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Speaker 2: for success. But it's not well in some cases maybe,

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Speaker 2: But I look at you. You did a post yesterday.

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Speaker 2: It was perfect timing for this mate. The post was

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Speaker 2: called don't waste your potential. You said forty years ago.

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Speaker 2: Forty years harps. Geez, you're looking fresh. Look at him,

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Speaker 2: wiz Yeah, no, look at me.

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Speaker 1: I was only six.

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Speaker 2: I started in grade so that's all right. Forty years

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Speaker 2: ago in brackets. In grade two I started a thing

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Speaker 2: called personal training. People said it wouldn't last, nobody would pay.

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Speaker 2: At best, it was a fat Four years later I

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Speaker 2: set up something called a personal training center. Than were

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Speaker 2: any in Australia. I was told I wasn't prepared for business.

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Speaker 2: I wasn't that I was naive. I was that I

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Speaker 2: would go broke. I didn't, it would fail, didn't have

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Speaker 2: a quarter of a century. I set up four centers

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Speaker 2: work with thousands of clients, employed hundreds of pets, trained

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Speaker 2: professional sporting teams, multiple Olympians, and found my way into

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Speaker 2: the worlds of media, academia, corporate high performance, and personal development.

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Speaker 2: I am grateful I did the work and grateful I

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Speaker 2: didn't listen to those who predicted my demise. We end

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Speaker 2: the podcast here, couldn't.

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Speaker 1: We forty years? Yeah? You coming out of a night success.

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Speaker 2: Thank you, great mate, thank you, Thanks poor boys girls,

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Speaker 2: shortest podcast amazing harps have ever done.

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Speaker 1: I think well for me anyway. I can't speak on

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Speaker 1: behalf anyone else, but because I'm not like I reckon,

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Speaker 1: you'll argue this, but I would say that you are

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Speaker 1: more innately talented and probably intelligent than me. I'm not

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Speaker 1: saying I have no talent or no intellect, but because

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Speaker 1: I've always been like at school, I didn't have great genes.

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Speaker 1: I wasn't a great academic, I wasn't sporting. I was

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Speaker 1: morbidly obese, and you know, until I lost a whole

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Speaker 1: bunch of weight, I was in many ways. I was

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Speaker 1: very media okah, and if not aiming for mediocre, but

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Speaker 1: I was kind of fascinated with human behavior and initially

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Speaker 1: my own ability and my own potential and my own possibilities.

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Speaker 1: And I ended up losing a bunch of weight and

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Speaker 1: going from a terrible athlete to not a bad athlete,

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Speaker 1: not a great athlete, but not a bad athlete, you know,

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Speaker 1: playing reasonable footy and doing like things that I could

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Speaker 1: never have done, and building a body that was, you know,

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Speaker 1: a way better version of the previous version, and going

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Speaker 1: okay at a few things. And I kind of realized

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Speaker 1: that for me, my mediocrity was almost my motivation, because

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Speaker 1: I knew that if I was ever going to do

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Speaker 1: any good, it was only going to just be work

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Speaker 1: and focus and commitment and discipline and fucking courage and

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Speaker 1: self control because I was not you know, I went

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Speaker 1: to school with lots of gifted kids creatively gifted, musically, gifted, athletically,

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Speaker 1: gifted in intellectually, academically. I was in none of those groups.

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Speaker 1: So for me, that's always been ironically a source of inspiration.

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Speaker 2: I'm thinking of Angela Duckworth's theory of grit as you're

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Speaker 2: talking about that, and she talks about grit eickalls passion

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Speaker 2: plus hard work determination. So you find something you enjoy,

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Speaker 2: your passionate about and then do the bloody work. What

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Speaker 2: I've seen. The research shows this as well with a

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Speaker 2: lot of high performers. Initially, so the super talented kid,

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Speaker 2: the young boy or girl who's just been blessed with

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Speaker 2: God's gift or whatever denomination's gift, and they get by

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Speaker 2: without doing much work, and they get external feedback, Hey,

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Speaker 2: you're really good at tennis, at violin, English, at debating,

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Speaker 2: and you've done no work. So what does that reinforce?

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Speaker 2: I'm really good and I've done no work. Everyone's telling

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Speaker 2: me I'm really good, So I don't do work, and

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Speaker 2: then eventually some kids like Harps and I'm going to

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Speaker 2: come back. I argue, not that you were less talented.

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Speaker 2: It you're a renovator's dream and perhaps whatever the role

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Speaker 2: modeling environment, because.

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Speaker 1: You're just can you use that for the title Harps

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Speaker 1: in brackets the renovators.

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Speaker 2: Dream done, got it chaped. But that conditioning at a

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Speaker 2: young age, it's luck. You really do play the luck lottery,

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Speaker 2: and you often take the piss out of yourself. The

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Speaker 2: fat kid from the rabin who's done good, but you

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Speaker 2: had the call there. You just needed to get the

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Speaker 2: self worth, the self effictcausey exercise. So I wouldn't argue

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Speaker 2: that I'm any more or less talented. You just didn't

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Speaker 2: get off to a good start. And I find that

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Speaker 2: with a lot of people, as you do in the

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Speaker 2: parallel lives we have of coaching and podcasting and speaking

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Speaker 2: and writing and working with higher performers. Environment is massive

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Speaker 2: where you come from, but it doesn't have to shape

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Speaker 2: and dictate the rest of your life.

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Speaker 1: One hundred. That's a fucking great Sorry for all the

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Speaker 1: swearing Andrews listeners, I'm very sweary. One of the questions

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Speaker 1: that I'm sure you've been asked, I've been asked, I

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Speaker 1: don't know many, more than hundreds of times, maybe thousands,

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Speaker 1: but is you know, what about when I lose motivation

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Speaker 1: or how do I stay motivated? Or how do I

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Speaker 1: get motivated? Or how do I And I said, it's

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Speaker 1: not it's not the right question. Like you're operating on

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Speaker 1: the assumption that motivation is the key to transformation, and

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Speaker 1: if that were the case, well, I definitely wouldn't have

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Speaker 1: done anything because I am just because I'm not motivated,

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Speaker 1: you know, And with motivated, I'm talking about when most

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Speaker 1: people talk about motivation, they talk about the state they're

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Speaker 1: in excitement, enthusiasm, how they're feeling. Right. I listen to

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Speaker 1: Anna and Craig talk and I was so motivated. Right

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Speaker 1: what happened? They had a state change, now motivated, So

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Speaker 1: I went for a run, got up next morning, was

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Speaker 1: a motivated, didn't go for a run. So there's this

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Speaker 1: correlation between you know, or assumed correlation, if not causation

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Speaker 1: between I am motivated, therefore you know that means I'm

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Speaker 1: going to produce good outcomes and when I'm not motivated,

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Speaker 1: I won't and I reckon. The key question with all

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Speaker 1: this kind of messiness around this is two key things. One,

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Speaker 1: how productive and proactive and effective can you be when

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Speaker 1: you can't be fucked that very human state of oh,

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Speaker 1: can't be fucked cool? Now's the time. Now's the time

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Speaker 1: right now, when you don't want it, when you don't

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Speaker 1: feel like it, when your foots a little bit sore,

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Speaker 1: when you're a bit tired, when you could absolutely rationalize it.

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Speaker 1: This might I'm not saying it always is. There's a

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Speaker 1: time to chill out too, but sometimes that's the time

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Speaker 1: literally to go do the thing that you need to

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Speaker 1: do but you don't want to do. The second question

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Speaker 1: is around your capacity to do stuff. And this is

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Speaker 1: almost the inverse of fifteen Minutes of Fame Corey Worthington,

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Speaker 1: et l. But is your capacity to be able to

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Speaker 1: do the things necessary when no one's looked, no one's cheering,

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Speaker 1: no one's clapping you on, no one's affirming you, no

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Speaker 1: one's telling you're a great bloke or slapping your back.

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Speaker 1: In fact, no one gives a shit. Show me what

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Speaker 1: you can do, then, because I think that's over the

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Speaker 1: long term. If we're talking about success being not a

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Speaker 1: flash in the pan thing, but rather a reflection of

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Speaker 1: how we live and our life and lifestyle and relationships

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Speaker 1: and internal and external reality, then I think we're looking

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Speaker 1: at a long term thing. I think it's your capacity

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Speaker 1: just to keep doing the things that work, whether or

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Speaker 1: not it's fun or not.

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Speaker 2: I'm nodding profusely. People watching this on YouTube will see

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Speaker 2: and ladies and gents, I love wining the big fella

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Speaker 2: up because we can riff and rant and you make

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Speaker 2: me think of frameworks and maybe some dormant models that

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Speaker 2: have been sitting there. As you said that totally aligned.

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Speaker 2: Harp's totally aligned. I look at motivation is more external

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Speaker 2: extrinsic exogynist.

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Speaker 1: So it's all that.

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Speaker 2: So sometimes people say, oh, I need you harps, I'll

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Speaker 2: listen to the you project, I'll go to your personal

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Speaker 2: training studio because you can motivate me. So it's requiring

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Speaker 2: someone else to do it for you. Now, motivation can

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Speaker 2: get your started. It's like a jumpstart of the car.

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Speaker 2: But then you've got to fix the engine so you

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Speaker 2: can start it yourself. I'm going to get a bit

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Speaker 2: playful on words, but the origin of the word inspiration

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Speaker 2: the Latin word inspirare, which means to breathe life into.

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Speaker 2: So I'm much more aligned to find what inspires you,

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Speaker 2: what's internalized, and then if you can link that back

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Speaker 2: to purpose, that's rocket feel. So I'm not discounting sometimes

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Speaker 2: you do need a friendly kick in the proverbials to

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Speaker 2: get you going.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I love it. I love it. My simple similar

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Speaker 1: analogy is or metaphor is you know, it's a spark

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Speaker 1: that lights the fire, but you're the actual feel that

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Speaker 1: keeps the fire burning. Right, So I think, firstly, I'm

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Speaker 1: not anti motivation. I love motivation, you know, I think

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Speaker 1: for many of us it's you know, it's the starting

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Speaker 1: point and it's the thing that creates momentum, which is beautiful,

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Speaker 1: but I think we don't want to be dependent on it,

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Speaker 1: just like we don't want to be dependent on praise

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Speaker 1: or reinforcement or accolades or attention. Like I think it's

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Speaker 1: almost like the currency in twenty twenty five is attention.

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Speaker 1: That's what everybody wants. They want attention, you know, on

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Speaker 1: social media, on Instagram, on Facebook, on whatever, on TikTok.

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Speaker 1: It's like, give me attention, give me attention, give me attention,

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Speaker 1: because then I can leverage that attention to something else

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Speaker 1: that I want. You know. And while I understand that,

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Speaker 1: I think some of the greatest growth and resilience and

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Speaker 1: transformation and breakdowns and breakthroughs happen in the darkness. I'm

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Speaker 1: just holding the pause.

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Speaker 2: If I could cut out the studio lights and it

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Speaker 2: would have been a dramatic effect, wouldn't it for our

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Speaker 2: visual watches. Yeah, And this is the mistake a lot

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Speaker 2: of people make, especially I think the younger generation now.

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Speaker 2: And I'm not beating up on Jen hy gen Z millennials,

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Speaker 2: all the young troops coming through, but it is different

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Speaker 2: to when you and I grew up, because there was

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Speaker 2: no Internet to rocket you to fame. But then ask

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Speaker 2: that question. So you get all the downloads, but is

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Speaker 2: it actually making a difference for you? Now, Yes, some

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Speaker 2: people can accelerate a business that can say, grow a book,

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Speaker 2: grow a podcast quickly. But any athlete I sit down

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Speaker 2: with Harps, any coach, I sit down with any entrepreneur,

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Speaker 2: any high performer, any leader of defense who really wants

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Speaker 2: to go to the next level. I'm talking about world class.

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Speaker 2: It's a decade unless you're a ridiculous rock star and

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Speaker 2: you find you're in a current that just propels you

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Speaker 2: like nothing else, and then you see whether people are

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Speaker 2: really cut out for it. What you mean a decade?

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Speaker 2: I thought if I did some coaching with you and

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Speaker 2: did a bit of a mental ioways upgrade, I could

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Speaker 2: do this shit in twelve months. No, you like, you're good,

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Speaker 2: but to be great, or to be world class, it

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Speaker 2: takes you a long time. And I've got an example

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Speaker 2: for you, mate, because I know how in tune you

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Speaker 2: are with popular culture. So you listen to Sabrina Carpenter,

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Speaker 2: don't throw me under.

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Speaker 1: The bus like that after you pump up my ties.

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Speaker 1: I do not, so clearly I'm not up on pop culture.

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Speaker 2: You know her most popular song from twenty twenty four, Espresso, Right,

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Speaker 2: she's had millions of downloads.

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Speaker 1: Ah ah, yeah.

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Speaker 2: That's all I listened to. So when you do the

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Speaker 2: research for that. Before Espresso came out, she had five albums.

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Speaker 2: A couple of first ones were virtual, non existent. She

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Speaker 2: signed an agreement with Disney. She was in the TV

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Speaker 2: show Girl Meets World back in two thousand and fourteen,

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Speaker 2: and she was doing acting and singing before that. So

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Speaker 2: she's been fifteen plus years and then suddenly she rockets.

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Speaker 2: I only know of it because I've got a seventy

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Speaker 2: year old daughter. I mean, her and her friends were

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Speaker 2: talking about Sabrina Carpenter. I thought i'd google it and

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Speaker 2: I did, and they were talking. I said, oh, I

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Speaker 2: love espress it. But what I really like is how

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Speaker 2: she's grown from her Disney person a Girl Meets World.

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Speaker 2: And one of Mikla's friends looked at me and she

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Speaker 2: just looked looked at me, really impressed, and she said

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Speaker 2: to Micala, I wish my dad was that girl.

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Speaker 1: Michale said, no, you don't, No, you don't. Yeah, I

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Speaker 1: love that. I have a really, I think nice story

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Speaker 1: around that. So I had a guy called Jim Murphy

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Speaker 1: on my show. He's not this similar to you, Like,

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Speaker 1: he's a high performance guy, got masters, works with teams

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Speaker 1: and athletes. He's from the States. He wrote a book.

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Speaker 1: I'm going to say, I think it's called In Her

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Speaker 1: Excellence The blah blah, but something like that in two

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Speaker 1: thousand and nine. I think that's the Anyway, his story is.

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Speaker 1: His story is that you've got to get him on,

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Speaker 1: Like get him on, you will love him. I mean so,

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Speaker 1: But here's his story. So he wrote this book sixteen

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Speaker 1: years ago and it did okay, but no one knows

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Speaker 1: who he is. Right, And he was a budding, fledgling

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Speaker 1: baseball player, got signed to a major baseball league club,

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Speaker 1: didn't had a few issues, didn't really go anywhere, ended

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Speaker 1: up going back to school, did all this stuff, and

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Speaker 1: so it was doing okay but not great. So he

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Speaker 1: wrote this book and the book is good, but no

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Speaker 1: one knows who is. He doesn't have a brand, he

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Speaker 1: doesn't have a profile. I don't know how many books

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Speaker 1: he sells. But you know it's not a it's not

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Speaker 1: a breakthrough, groundbreaking, world changing book. Anyway. Sixteen years later,

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Speaker 1: earlier this year, I'm trying to remember. I keep learning,

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Speaker 1: you know when you learn like five new things a day.

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Speaker 1: And anyway, there was an NFL player during a game.

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Speaker 1: He's one of the best players in the NFL. I

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Speaker 1: think he's a running back. Anyway, during the game, this

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Speaker 1: is this year, sixteen years later after Jim wrote the book.

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Speaker 1: He's sitting on the sidelines. You know how the offensive

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Speaker 1: team goes on, then they come off, and then the

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Speaker 1: defense goes on. So every time he would be back

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Speaker 1: on the sidelines, he would be reading this book, this

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Speaker 1: sixteen year old book that this dude wrote. And all

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Speaker 1: of a sudden, the commentator is like, I've never ever

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Speaker 1: seen an NFL player reading a book during the game.

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Speaker 1: And they zoomed in and there's bits highlighted and he's

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Speaker 1: it's like these are his anyways, So this dude almost

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Speaker 1: overnight becomes the biggest selling author on the planet.

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Speaker 2: What a great story, A lote moment.

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Speaker 1: So sixteen years old, the book is all of a sudden,

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Speaker 1: He's on every major network. He's doing interviews, he's doing

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Speaker 1: speaking gigs all around the world. He's talking a little

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Speaker 1: Fatty Harps in Australia, like he's gone from and it

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Speaker 1: took sixteen years, and it was because one moment in time,

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Speaker 1: like there was a guy reading that book, like he

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Speaker 1: does work with good athletes, so he's you know, I'd

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Speaker 1: say he's probably at the level you and Irad or

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Speaker 1: you know, but it's not like his Oprah or maybe

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Speaker 1: maybe he's not quite or wasn't quite at the level.

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Speaker 1: I'm not sure. It doesn't matter, but yeah, and what's

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Speaker 1: beautiful is he's a great guy. He is a great guy,

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Speaker 1: and he is so grounded and he is so not

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Speaker 1: a fathead. He is so humble, so self aware, and

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Speaker 1: I loved him. I'm like, I'm so glad you are

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Speaker 1: the way that you are because when I read your story,

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Speaker 1: when I looked at some of the TV footage and

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Speaker 1: you think, I hope this good is this guy's as

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Speaker 1: good as he seems, and he was even better and yeah,

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Speaker 1: just a gentleman and like he is going to ride

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Speaker 1: that wave now. But like I've never met him in person,

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Speaker 1: but great story.

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Speaker 2: Right place, right message, right time, right Blake, grounded and

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Speaker 2: he'll just accelerate. Oh definitely, I'll get his details because

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Speaker 2: that sounds a phenomenal story and good story. Totally backs up.

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Speaker 2: This doesn't it that. Yes, you may become viral, which

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Speaker 2: is a new term, but viral does not equal long

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Speaker 2: term success or sustained performance. Got to ask you, do

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Speaker 2: you have a definition of success? All right, then I've

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Speaker 2: got a question for you. You know what I love

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Speaker 2: when we do podcast and even you sent this through

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Speaker 2: to me? Who's interviewing who?

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Speaker 1: Mate? I said, I don't really know.

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Speaker 2: I do you want to do a podcast?

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Speaker 1: I go, yeah, sure when? And you're like tomorrow? I'm like, okay,

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Speaker 1: who's interviewing who? Like? I don't care? Well? It mixes, right,

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Speaker 1: it mixes. Look, success for me is not a thing,

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Speaker 1: but it's it's a few things. And I think, like,

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Speaker 1: this is a really interesting conversation because and this is

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Speaker 1: true for many things, like success for me will not

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Speaker 1: be success for someone else. I might say, Andrew, when

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Speaker 1: it comes to personal health, what is success for you?

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Speaker 1: And you go ABC? And I go, all right, tell

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Speaker 1: me what success is now from a career point of view,

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Speaker 1: and that's something else? And I go, now, tell me

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Speaker 1: about your relationships? What how did you How do you

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Speaker 1: know if that is a successful party or exist or

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Speaker 1: it's where you would like it to be, And so

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Speaker 1: I think success is not for me. It's not a

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Speaker 1: global thing. It's a bunch of things, because my life

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00:22:08,840 --> 00:22:12,080
Speaker 1: is not a single thing. It's a composite of things.

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Speaker 1: And also I think for the individual, what we deem

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Speaker 1: to be success or our version or our I guess

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Speaker 1: description of success will vary over time. So if you

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Speaker 1: had have said to me, you know, Harps, what are

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00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:31,719
Speaker 1: you When I was thirty and I owned three gyms,

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Speaker 1: and I had one hundred staff, and I owned two

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Speaker 1: other businesses, and all this stuff was going on, and

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Speaker 1: I was in the gym and I was like the

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Speaker 1: captain of the ship, and it was high energy and

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Speaker 1: it was all bloody, you know, dumbbells and giggles and

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Speaker 1: photos of the old Harps. You're well, I was jacked

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Speaker 1: and full of ego and bullshit, and you know, for

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Speaker 1: a while there, I mean, it was just amazing. It

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Speaker 1: was beautiful, there was great energy. But then there came

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Speaker 1: a time when I'm like, yeah, no, that's enough. Yeah

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Speaker 1: it doesn't. This ain't what I want to do anymore.

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Speaker 1: It's not that it's bad, it's not that we're doing

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Speaker 1: anything wrong. I've just this doesn't meet the need in

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Speaker 1: me that it once did. I still want to work

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Speaker 1: with people and help people and be of service and value.

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Speaker 1: But me, you know, setting the bike seat for dinner,

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Speaker 1: and you know, counting reps for Barry, and you know,

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Speaker 1: fucking spotting John on the squat bar. It's not my

427
00:23:23,359 --> 00:23:23,960
Speaker 1: thing anymore.

428
00:23:24,080 --> 00:23:27,399
Speaker 2: You know, we have a lot of fitness traders and

429
00:23:27,440 --> 00:23:28,080
Speaker 2: personal traders.

430
00:23:28,160 --> 00:23:28,560
Speaker 1: Listen to this.

431
00:23:28,640 --> 00:23:31,399
Speaker 2: There's a little bit more than that. So I interrupted you.

432
00:23:31,680 --> 00:23:37,359
Speaker 2: So definition of success has changed for you?

433
00:23:37,720 --> 00:23:40,360
Speaker 1: It's ev Yeah, I think it's fluid. It's fluid. It's

434
00:23:40,440 --> 00:23:43,840
Speaker 1: like for somebody like I realized when I was in

435
00:23:43,880 --> 00:23:45,360
Speaker 1: my twenties that I don't want to be I don't

436
00:23:45,400 --> 00:23:47,159
Speaker 1: want a job. I don't want to work for someone.

437
00:23:47,240 --> 00:23:49,240
Speaker 1: I don't want to clock in at that time clock

438
00:23:49,280 --> 00:23:53,280
Speaker 1: out at that time. Not because that is bad, but

439
00:23:53,440 --> 00:23:56,040
Speaker 1: because it didn't work for me. I didn't find a

440
00:23:56,040 --> 00:23:58,199
Speaker 1: lot of joy in that or fulfillment in that, and

441
00:23:58,240 --> 00:24:00,320
Speaker 1: I couldn't grow in that. And I wanted to do

442
00:24:00,440 --> 00:24:04,240
Speaker 1: something where and I'm sure there were some employee employer

443
00:24:04,440 --> 00:24:08,040
Speaker 1: situations where I really could have grown, but not that

444
00:24:08,160 --> 00:24:12,480
Speaker 1: I had experienced personally. And so you know, for me

445
00:24:12,720 --> 00:24:16,359
Speaker 1: that success is about, you know, getting better in a way.

446
00:24:16,440 --> 00:24:19,919
Speaker 1: It's about learning and growing and evolving, and you know,

447
00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:23,400
Speaker 1: waking up at sixty one and going, hey, I'm not shit,

448
00:24:23,760 --> 00:24:27,520
Speaker 1: I'm not falling apart. My brain works. I mean, I

449
00:24:27,560 --> 00:24:30,000
Speaker 1: can't be objective, but as objective as I can be.

450
00:24:30,119 --> 00:24:31,919
Speaker 1: I think my brain is better than it was when

451
00:24:31,960 --> 00:24:35,040
Speaker 1: I was forty or thirty. I think I'm you know,

452
00:24:35,080 --> 00:24:40,040
Speaker 1: there's obviously deterioration, which is inevitable physiological deterioration. But I'm

453
00:24:40,040 --> 00:24:42,439
Speaker 1: still pretty fit and pretty strong and pretty healthy. You know,

454
00:24:42,480 --> 00:24:45,639
Speaker 1: I'm very grateful for all of that. So just trying

455
00:24:45,640 --> 00:24:48,080
Speaker 1: to work well, you know, can I double click on

456
00:24:48,119 --> 00:24:51,439
Speaker 1: that and that I want to talk about success? And

457
00:24:51,480 --> 00:24:55,400
Speaker 1: then you said you've got a question. I actually think

458
00:24:55,440 --> 00:25:00,119
Speaker 1: that the way that we think about age is really unhealthy,

459
00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:04,720
Speaker 1: really unhealthy. I believe that we you know, your mind

460
00:25:04,760 --> 00:25:07,119
Speaker 1: has a massive impact on your physiology. You know, if

461
00:25:07,160 --> 00:25:09,760
Speaker 1: you think something bad's gonna happen but it's not gonna happen,

462
00:25:09,840 --> 00:25:12,520
Speaker 1: you think you're in danger, then all of a sudden,

463
00:25:12,560 --> 00:25:16,040
Speaker 1: your bodi's change, sympathetic nervous system ENDO, crime's system, all

464
00:25:16,040 --> 00:25:19,880
Speaker 1: that stuff, blood pressure, adrenaline, cortisol, respiration, everything's through the roof,

465
00:25:20,240 --> 00:25:24,200
Speaker 1: like just a thought can have a negative physiological consequence.

466
00:25:24,320 --> 00:25:28,240
Speaker 1: And when your story is, oh, this is my age,

467
00:25:28,280 --> 00:25:31,879
Speaker 1: so therefore my options are now this when that's not

468
00:25:32,040 --> 00:25:37,359
Speaker 1: actually true. Of course, there's an inevitability about physiological aging,

469
00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:41,119
Speaker 1: of course, but the variability is how we age and

470
00:25:41,160 --> 00:25:45,200
Speaker 1: the rate at how we age, and also your honor.

471
00:25:45,520 --> 00:25:49,040
Speaker 1: While I'm pleading my case, the fifty year old who's

472
00:25:49,080 --> 00:25:52,960
Speaker 1: never really trained, who starts to train is going to

473
00:25:53,040 --> 00:25:55,520
Speaker 1: get better. They're not just going to kind of maintain.

474
00:25:56,359 --> 00:26:00,680
Speaker 1: They're gonna get better. And you think about how many

475
00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:06,480
Speaker 1: people consciously train their body, quite a few. How many

476
00:26:06,480 --> 00:26:12,800
Speaker 1: people consciously and I mean intentionally structured, reasoned application train

477
00:26:12,880 --> 00:26:18,280
Speaker 1: their brain almost none? Almost none. And your brain is

478
00:26:18,720 --> 00:26:22,480
Speaker 1: exactly like the rest of your body in that it

479
00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:25,919
Speaker 1: will deteriorate if you're not doing something to stop it

480
00:26:25,960 --> 00:26:29,280
Speaker 1: from deteriorating. And so for me, part of my reason

481
00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:32,840
Speaker 1: for doing a PhD is that is, like, oh, I

482
00:26:32,880 --> 00:26:35,480
Speaker 1: know so much stuff, not because I'm brilliant, not because

483
00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:38,040
Speaker 1: I'm smarter than anyone, but just because I've been through

484
00:26:38,080 --> 00:26:42,199
Speaker 1: this multi year process where oh I went into an

485
00:26:42,280 --> 00:26:46,080
Speaker 1: environment where I was totally inept. I'm not even being

486
00:26:46,119 --> 00:26:49,200
Speaker 1: metaphoric when I say I was literally the dumbest one

487
00:26:49,200 --> 00:26:51,359
Speaker 1: in the room. I couldn't speak the language, I didn't

488
00:26:51,400 --> 00:26:55,240
Speaker 1: understand the culture. I would read academic papers, I would

489
00:26:55,320 --> 00:26:58,600
Speaker 1: have to reread one page for an hour to understand

490
00:26:58,640 --> 00:27:01,439
Speaker 1: what the paper was saying. I didn't know how to

491
00:27:01,480 --> 00:27:05,080
Speaker 1: write at a PhD level. And that's among all the

492
00:27:05,160 --> 00:27:07,600
Speaker 1: other things I've been doing over the last five years.

493
00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:12,879
Speaker 1: And it's just because you know, I'm so excited about

494
00:27:13,200 --> 00:27:16,240
Speaker 1: and this is not bullshit for a podcast. I'm so

495
00:27:16,400 --> 00:27:20,520
Speaker 1: excited about what I can do, not what people think

496
00:27:20,520 --> 00:27:22,800
Speaker 1: of me, not how much money I can earn, but

497
00:27:22,920 --> 00:27:27,560
Speaker 1: just what I can do. Because I think our limitation

498
00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:31,360
Speaker 1: is not our potential or our capacity nearly as much

499
00:27:31,400 --> 00:27:34,840
Speaker 1: as it is our thinking about our potential. Like we

500
00:27:35,040 --> 00:27:39,960
Speaker 1: have age related thinking, and then we have people going, oh, well,

501
00:27:40,000 --> 00:27:43,040
Speaker 1: you know what your age. Your shut the fuck up

502
00:27:43,240 --> 00:27:46,639
Speaker 1: at your age, Like stop it. I mean, my training

503
00:27:46,640 --> 00:27:50,920
Speaker 1: partner just turned sixty. He looks like a fucking freak.

504
00:27:52,000 --> 00:27:55,040
Speaker 1: And his you know, he rides an hour and a

505
00:27:55,040 --> 00:27:58,399
Speaker 1: half two hours a day on his bike. He still works,

506
00:27:58,440 --> 00:28:02,000
Speaker 1: he still does stuff, he trains, he's learning all the time.

507
00:28:02,600 --> 00:28:05,960
Speaker 1: He's always researching. He's always doing stuff. He's got three kids,

508
00:28:06,000 --> 00:28:08,159
Speaker 1: he's got a wife. It's not like he's self centered.

509
00:28:08,240 --> 00:28:12,000
Speaker 1: He's not. And he inspires me. He's you know, and

510
00:28:12,040 --> 00:28:13,679
Speaker 1: he's a year and a half younger than me.

511
00:28:14,160 --> 00:28:18,080
Speaker 2: Your body language, everything ramped up your volume. We've we've

512
00:28:18,160 --> 00:28:19,320
Speaker 2: hit a hot button.

513
00:28:19,920 --> 00:28:22,600
Speaker 1: My question to you is, I just want to circle

514
00:28:22,640 --> 00:28:25,880
Speaker 1: back to one thing we spoke about, you know, fifteen

515
00:28:25,920 --> 00:28:28,439
Speaker 1: minutes of fame. Fame, everyone wants to be literally. I

516
00:28:28,480 --> 00:28:30,280
Speaker 1: did a talk at a school a few months ago,

517
00:28:30,280 --> 00:28:32,480
Speaker 1: which I don't do many schools, but it was year tens,

518
00:28:33,119 --> 00:28:36,719
Speaker 1: private college, of course it was, and we spoke about

519
00:28:36,960 --> 00:28:39,040
Speaker 1: you know, the why and what and how of goals

520
00:28:39,040 --> 00:28:41,480
Speaker 1: and stuff, very basic, and I just said, who wants

521
00:28:41,520 --> 00:28:44,720
Speaker 1: to go? Why don't you five, five of you tell

522
00:28:44,760 --> 00:28:46,840
Speaker 1: me what your goals are? I said, I need five hands.

523
00:28:46,880 --> 00:28:49,680
Speaker 1: Five hands went up. Two of the five. You know what?

524
00:28:49,720 --> 00:28:54,680
Speaker 1: The goal was? To be famous? That's their goal. Now

525
00:28:54,720 --> 00:28:56,960
Speaker 1: I'm not judging that. I'm just curious about that.

526
00:28:57,840 --> 00:29:03,080
Speaker 2: Also in that generation to be YouTubers Instagram.

527
00:29:03,120 --> 00:29:07,479
Speaker 1: Yeah why And they're like what, I go, why so

528
00:29:07,520 --> 00:29:10,160
Speaker 1: you want to be famous? Why? Neither of them could

529
00:29:10,200 --> 00:29:16,120
Speaker 1: tell me. I think people confuse fame or even popularity

530
00:29:17,080 --> 00:29:21,800
Speaker 1: with love. Like I've got a reasonably high profile. I'm

531
00:29:21,840 --> 00:29:26,160
Speaker 1: definitely not famous, but you know in Melbourne, I'm moderately

532
00:29:26,200 --> 00:29:30,000
Speaker 1: well known. But I don't confuse that at all with

533
00:29:30,320 --> 00:29:35,960
Speaker 1: friendships or real connection or love or you know. It's

534
00:29:36,080 --> 00:29:38,520
Speaker 1: like I reckon, if you have five people in your

535
00:29:38,520 --> 00:29:42,800
Speaker 1: life who love you unconditionally, you're doing great. So what

536
00:29:42,840 --> 00:29:45,040
Speaker 1: do you think about fame? What's the drive? Why do

537
00:29:45,120 --> 00:29:45,959
Speaker 1: people want that?

538
00:29:47,040 --> 00:29:49,320
Speaker 2: I'm going to try and tap this into my definition

539
00:29:49,360 --> 00:29:52,320
Speaker 2: of success and try and wrap two open loops up together.

540
00:29:52,680 --> 00:29:55,720
Speaker 2: So this is either going to go ah, our audience

541
00:29:55,760 --> 00:29:58,360
Speaker 2: will go that makes sense, or they go he totally

542
00:29:58,440 --> 00:30:00,760
Speaker 2: stuffs that on our bold symbol. I've dropped to sitter.

543
00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:06,520
Speaker 2: I think there's two definitions, or two origins of success.

544
00:30:07,480 --> 00:30:09,760
Speaker 2: One is external and that it can be aligned to

545
00:30:09,880 --> 00:30:14,160
Speaker 2: your performance based identity. I perform Therefore I am now

546
00:30:14,160 --> 00:30:16,960
Speaker 2: there's nothing wrong with that. You and I have worked

547
00:30:16,960 --> 00:30:21,680
Speaker 2: with hundreds collectively of athletes, thousands of people, tens of

548
00:30:21,720 --> 00:30:26,800
Speaker 2: thousands who have been driven by a performance based identity,

549
00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:28,480
Speaker 2: and that is external and extremes.

550
00:30:28,480 --> 00:30:29,120
Speaker 1: You can get.

551
00:30:28,920 --> 00:30:31,760
Speaker 2: Rewarded with money and fame and cash and accolades and

552
00:30:32,800 --> 00:30:36,280
Speaker 2: love and relationships and all that stuff, and there's nothing

553
00:30:36,320 --> 00:30:38,320
Speaker 2: wrong with that. But where I spend a lot of

554
00:30:38,320 --> 00:30:40,120
Speaker 2: my time and I know you do, is then try

555
00:30:40,200 --> 00:30:46,520
Speaker 2: to stitch that together with more internal intrinsic, inspirational, and

556
00:30:46,560 --> 00:30:50,560
Speaker 2: that's a purpose based identity, and that's who I am

557
00:30:50,600 --> 00:30:53,560
Speaker 2: in this world and how I contribute. And for a

558
00:30:53,560 --> 00:30:56,440
Speaker 2: lot of people that go our purpose, mate, I'm too busy, tired, distracted,

559
00:30:56,440 --> 00:30:57,160
Speaker 2: I can't go there.

560
00:30:57,160 --> 00:30:59,080
Speaker 1: Well, just look at meaning. What gives you meaning?

561
00:30:59,480 --> 00:31:01,440
Speaker 2: So I think they are the two definitions. And this

562
00:31:01,560 --> 00:31:03,400
Speaker 2: is not new because you look at the literature. You've

563
00:31:03,440 --> 00:31:07,600
Speaker 2: got you'd ammonia and heat ammonia. The you'd ammonia aligned

564
00:31:07,600 --> 00:31:10,640
Speaker 2: to the Greek word or philosophy of being connected. It's

565
00:31:10,640 --> 00:31:12,600
Speaker 2: more than you and headimonia is all about just you

566
00:31:12,680 --> 00:31:15,560
Speaker 2: and power and kudos and everything else. So to me,

567
00:31:15,760 --> 00:31:18,479
Speaker 2: I think there's a beautiful diagram like a ven diagram,

568
00:31:18,560 --> 00:31:20,800
Speaker 2: and you can have them both intersecting. So do I

569
00:31:20,920 --> 00:31:23,720
Speaker 2: want to build a business and make money and have

570
00:31:23,760 --> 00:31:25,840
Speaker 2: a nice house and a car and have some experiences?

571
00:31:25,880 --> 00:31:30,120
Speaker 2: Abs A frequently harps absolutely, But is that the only goal? No,

572
00:31:30,440 --> 00:31:32,640
Speaker 2: because the first forty years of my life, I was

573
00:31:32,720 --> 00:31:37,320
Speaker 2: so performance based, and then you know, my story went

574
00:31:37,360 --> 00:31:39,960
Speaker 2: through a marriage breakdown, living in a big house, big cars,

575
00:31:40,000 --> 00:31:42,720
Speaker 2: water views, two kids, and I was miserable because there's

576
00:31:42,760 --> 00:31:45,200
Speaker 2: nothing for me. So to me, it's the stitching together

577
00:31:45,280 --> 00:31:49,160
Speaker 2: of the two. Now, if you do that, it's sustainable.

578
00:31:49,240 --> 00:31:52,160
Speaker 2: If you do that, it can be really impactful because

579
00:31:52,160 --> 00:31:54,840
Speaker 2: then you're living on your terms, your purpose. So then

580
00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:59,680
Speaker 2: what is fame. Fame could be the barista in a

581
00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:02,720
Speaker 2: small country town it makes frickin awesome coffee that keeps

582
00:32:02,720 --> 00:32:05,719
Speaker 2: everyone awake, but more so connected first thing of a morning.

583
00:32:06,520 --> 00:32:09,720
Speaker 2: Or fame may be getting millions of record styles and downloads.

584
00:32:11,480 --> 00:32:13,560
Speaker 2: But to me, it's stitching the two together. So I

585
00:32:13,600 --> 00:32:16,120
Speaker 2: think you can have external success, but you've got to

586
00:32:16,120 --> 00:32:19,080
Speaker 2: be grounded in a set of values, and the purpose

587
00:32:19,160 --> 00:32:21,959
Speaker 2: is bigger than you. It's future focused, and it excites

588
00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:24,600
Speaker 2: the living daylights out of here. I've just gone pretty

589
00:32:24,640 --> 00:32:27,200
Speaker 2: deep and broad with you. So to me, it's those

590
00:32:27,240 --> 00:32:32,200
Speaker 2: two definitions of all identities, the purpose based identity and

591
00:32:32,240 --> 00:32:35,400
Speaker 2: the performance based identity. And I find I'm sure for

592
00:32:35,440 --> 00:32:38,280
Speaker 2: your audience and my audience, a lot of them will

593
00:32:38,320 --> 00:32:41,320
Speaker 2: understand the performance based identity, because that's what the that's

594
00:32:41,320 --> 00:32:45,080
Speaker 2: the school board that we're measured on. We're measured on this.

595
00:32:45,200 --> 00:32:46,960
Speaker 2: You make the team where you don't you score the

596
00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:49,160
Speaker 2: points or you don't you get the girl or the guy,

597
00:32:49,240 --> 00:32:51,520
Speaker 2: or you don't you get the metrics at work or

598
00:32:51,560 --> 00:32:51,920
Speaker 2: you don't.

599
00:32:52,000 --> 00:32:53,120
Speaker 1: So life is very.

600
00:32:53,040 --> 00:32:55,520
Speaker 2: Much performance based, and I think for a lot of people,

601
00:32:55,880 --> 00:32:58,120
Speaker 2: you've got to adapt to that and work with that.

602
00:32:59,000 --> 00:33:01,320
Speaker 2: Why we have so many people although who earns so

603
00:33:01,440 --> 00:33:03,360
Speaker 2: much money. I've worked with a couple of billionaires and

604
00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:07,960
Speaker 2: no miserable bastards because they develop nothing about the heart

605
00:33:08,360 --> 00:33:11,560
Speaker 2: or about the connection of the purpose. I'll draw a breath.

606
00:33:11,600 --> 00:33:13,640
Speaker 2: There's a very long answer to a simple question.

607
00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:18,800
Speaker 1: No, No, I like it. I like it. I think identity

608
00:33:18,880 --> 00:33:24,160
Speaker 1: is a really interesting door to open because we often

609
00:33:24,200 --> 00:33:30,800
Speaker 1: attach our beliefs or our talent or our capacity to

610
00:33:30,960 --> 00:33:34,320
Speaker 1: win or whatever it is. You know. It's like obviously

611
00:33:34,360 --> 00:33:37,880
Speaker 1: religion's a big one, but you know, when you believe something,

612
00:33:38,080 --> 00:33:40,720
Speaker 1: or you think you believe something, or you do believe something,

613
00:33:40,840 --> 00:33:43,760
Speaker 1: or you think you know something, you think you're right

614
00:33:43,880 --> 00:33:46,640
Speaker 1: about something, you think you have the answer, you have

615
00:33:46,920 --> 00:33:51,280
Speaker 1: insight that other people don't have, and that becomes intertwined

616
00:33:51,360 --> 00:33:57,080
Speaker 1: with if not truly representative of your identity, then you

617
00:33:57,160 --> 00:34:01,880
Speaker 1: make yourself pretty much unteachable unless somebody is echoing your

618
00:34:01,920 --> 00:34:07,040
Speaker 1: same thoughts, right, And this is a you know, of course,

619
00:34:07,120 --> 00:34:11,440
Speaker 1: confirmation bias and the famous old echo chamber, and you

620
00:34:11,480 --> 00:34:16,000
Speaker 1: know we that it is two things are I think

621
00:34:16,800 --> 00:34:21,040
Speaker 1: true in most people. At the same time we say, oh, yeah,

622
00:34:21,040 --> 00:34:23,040
Speaker 1: I want to be a better version of me. I'm

623
00:34:23,120 --> 00:34:27,319
Speaker 1: open minded, I love learning. Da da da da da.

624
00:34:27,800 --> 00:34:30,920
Speaker 1: But at the same time we are pretty much fucking

625
00:34:31,080 --> 00:34:36,080
Speaker 1: rock solid unteachable on certain things because we think that

626
00:34:36,280 --> 00:34:39,840
Speaker 1: we absolutely know when we don't know. We don't have knowledge.

627
00:34:39,880 --> 00:34:42,880
Speaker 1: We have belief. We have faith, and faith and belief

628
00:34:42,880 --> 00:34:46,440
Speaker 1: are good things. But it's like I've probably said this

629
00:34:46,480 --> 00:34:49,200
Speaker 1: to you at some stage and maybe listeners, but I

630
00:34:49,280 --> 00:34:52,440
Speaker 1: grew up and it's not about religion. It's about thinking.

631
00:34:52,520 --> 00:34:56,000
Speaker 1: It's about metacognition. It's about understanding why you think the

632
00:34:56,040 --> 00:35:00,120
Speaker 1: way you think, and understanding why you have such a

633
00:35:00,160 --> 00:35:04,120
Speaker 1: fear based emotional attachment to an idea or a construct

634
00:35:04,440 --> 00:35:09,040
Speaker 1: or an ideology because you are the ideology and if

635
00:35:09,080 --> 00:35:12,439
Speaker 1: someone attacks the ideology or thought or the belief, then

636
00:35:12,520 --> 00:35:17,719
Speaker 1: you feel attacked. Now, when you are intertwined with something

637
00:35:17,840 --> 00:35:21,480
Speaker 1: else that isn't you, especially if we're talking about a

638
00:35:21,520 --> 00:35:28,160
Speaker 1: theoretical construct, it's it's very, very hard to truly be

639
00:35:28,320 --> 00:35:34,040
Speaker 1: objective and awhere and conscious because you are always looking

640
00:35:34,080 --> 00:35:37,000
Speaker 1: at life through the window of or the filter of

641
00:35:37,320 --> 00:35:40,799
Speaker 1: I am a Vegan, I am a Catholic, I am

642
00:35:40,840 --> 00:35:43,600
Speaker 1: a whatever. It is not the being a vegan or

643
00:35:43,600 --> 00:35:46,359
Speaker 1: a Catholic about, of course, but it's hello to all

644
00:35:46,400 --> 00:35:50,120
Speaker 1: of that vegan Catholic podcast. But it's no. But do

645
00:35:50,239 --> 00:35:52,879
Speaker 1: I have self limiting beliefs? Yes? Do I Look, I mean,

646
00:35:52,880 --> 00:35:54,719
Speaker 1: this is the point. This is I'm saying this for

647
00:35:54,800 --> 00:35:58,399
Speaker 1: me too. I'm saying there was a I was also.

648
00:35:58,440 --> 00:35:59,799
Speaker 1: I don't know if you know this, but I went

649
00:35:59,800 --> 00:36:05,080
Speaker 1: through a phase where I went to a fundamental born

650
00:36:05,120 --> 00:36:08,560
Speaker 1: again Christian tambourine banging, rafter swinging.

651
00:36:08,239 --> 00:36:11,640
Speaker 2: Church for years years just on that people. People can

652
00:36:11,680 --> 00:36:14,360
Speaker 2: go back in our backlog on the Performance Intelligence podcast,

653
00:36:15,120 --> 00:36:17,040
Speaker 2: not the most recent one, I think the one before that,

654
00:36:17,320 --> 00:36:19,080
Speaker 2: episode number one hundred and two.

655
00:36:19,239 --> 00:36:20,160
Speaker 1: Do you remember the title.

656
00:36:20,440 --> 00:36:22,120
Speaker 2: I think it's the best title we've ever done in

657
00:36:22,160 --> 00:36:25,000
Speaker 2: a podcast. It was Jesus Joe's Hands.

658
00:36:24,719 --> 00:36:33,799
Speaker 1: And Jeers that's right, that's right, remember conversation. But there

659
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:37,080
Speaker 1: were times when if you tried to even talk to

660
00:36:37,120 --> 00:36:42,480
Speaker 1: me about something that was an alternate theology or theory,

661
00:36:42,760 --> 00:36:45,839
Speaker 1: I wouldn't have listened to you, right, And that is

662
00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:49,120
Speaker 1: all about me. That is all about and I understand that.

663
00:36:49,160 --> 00:36:51,680
Speaker 1: So I'm not saying don't believe, don't think. I'm not

664
00:36:51,719 --> 00:36:55,319
Speaker 1: saying that. I'm saying, if we truly want to be

665
00:36:56,280 --> 00:37:02,080
Speaker 1: teachable and cognitively and emotionally and even spiritually malleable, like

666
00:37:02,160 --> 00:37:04,799
Speaker 1: that is where we are open to learn. We are

667
00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:08,560
Speaker 1: okay with being wrong. We are okay with not knowing.

668
00:37:08,760 --> 00:37:10,799
Speaker 1: Here's an idea. When someone asks you something and you

669
00:37:10,840 --> 00:37:15,920
Speaker 1: don't know, go I don't know the end. Not Ah,

670
00:37:16,080 --> 00:37:18,680
Speaker 1: It's like there's so much shit of all there is

671
00:37:18,719 --> 00:37:21,320
Speaker 1: to know. If all there is to know is an ocean,

672
00:37:21,440 --> 00:37:23,600
Speaker 1: I'm a drop of water in that ocean.

673
00:37:23,640 --> 00:37:27,000
Speaker 2: When you do that, not even I find I wouldn't

674
00:37:27,000 --> 00:37:28,920
Speaker 2: have done that in my early career because I thought

675
00:37:29,000 --> 00:37:34,120
Speaker 2: I've got to be this omniscient, omnipotent person pretending it's bullshit.

676
00:37:34,160 --> 00:37:36,400
Speaker 2: It's a facade when you say to somehow, I don't know.

677
00:37:36,760 --> 00:37:38,840
Speaker 2: I had an athlete last week and a coach actually

678
00:37:38,840 --> 00:37:41,040
Speaker 2: talking to both of them. They asked me something. I said, Okay,

679
00:37:41,040 --> 00:37:44,320
Speaker 2: that's a really good question. I'm not sure. Can you

680
00:37:44,360 --> 00:37:46,359
Speaker 2: give me a bit of time to go and check

681
00:37:46,400 --> 00:37:48,960
Speaker 2: on that and I'll come bat you. The athletic left

682
00:37:48,960 --> 00:37:50,440
Speaker 2: and I was with the coach just having a coffee.

683
00:37:50,480 --> 00:37:54,799
Speaker 2: He said, that was really refreshing. I said, what I said?

684
00:37:54,800 --> 00:37:56,200
Speaker 2: When you just said I'm going to go and check that,

685
00:37:56,280 --> 00:37:58,040
Speaker 2: I said, well, I didn't know. I wasn't going to

686
00:37:58,120 --> 00:38:01,719
Speaker 2: make it up. We're talking about something pretty serious to

687
00:38:01,760 --> 00:38:06,560
Speaker 2: this athlete. I said, it's totally totally negligent of me

688
00:38:06,800 --> 00:38:09,280
Speaker 2: to make that up if I don't know that comes

689
00:38:09,280 --> 00:38:13,040
Speaker 2: with age. And just to wrap out on success, because

690
00:38:13,040 --> 00:38:14,839
Speaker 2: I want to talk a little bit about hard work,

691
00:38:14,880 --> 00:38:17,520
Speaker 2: which is non sexy and boring, and as you said,

692
00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:20,800
Speaker 2: done in the shadows. What if we got our listeners

693
00:38:20,880 --> 00:38:24,439
Speaker 2: and our viewers, so our collective audience to just sit

694
00:38:24,520 --> 00:38:28,480
Speaker 2: down and write down what is success for you? Grab

695
00:38:28,760 --> 00:38:32,000
Speaker 2: a beverage of your choice, and just sit down for

696
00:38:32,000 --> 00:38:34,640
Speaker 2: ten or fifteen minutes with no distraction and just ask

697
00:38:34,719 --> 00:38:38,520
Speaker 2: that question. What is success or a statement? Success for

698
00:38:38,680 --> 00:38:40,080
Speaker 2: me is dot dot dot?

699
00:38:40,440 --> 00:38:40,600
Speaker 1: Now?

700
00:38:40,640 --> 00:38:44,680
Speaker 2: I gave you that definition with two nice circles crossed

701
00:38:44,719 --> 00:38:48,279
Speaker 2: over purpose based identity, performance based identity, but made. It's

702
00:38:48,280 --> 00:38:50,680
Speaker 2: taken me lots of highs and lows and stuff ups

703
00:38:50,719 --> 00:38:52,960
Speaker 2: and fuck ups to actually put that together. And a

704
00:38:53,000 --> 00:38:55,160
Speaker 2: simple one for me is making sure I'm making a

705
00:38:55,200 --> 00:38:57,800
Speaker 2: contribution to the outside world, connecting with my loved ones

706
00:38:58,160 --> 00:39:01,280
Speaker 2: and from a personal point of view, engaged and feeling

707
00:39:01,400 --> 00:39:03,000
Speaker 2: like I'm being deuced. So it doesn't have to be

708
00:39:03,080 --> 00:39:06,920
Speaker 2: high level, high science, high tech. What is it that

709
00:39:07,800 --> 00:39:11,000
Speaker 2: defines or delineates success for you? And you know what, harps,

710
00:39:11,600 --> 00:39:13,439
Speaker 2: You've been on this planet just a little bit longer

711
00:39:13,440 --> 00:39:17,920
Speaker 2: than me, mate. But the more I deal with people,

712
00:39:18,080 --> 00:39:20,600
Speaker 2: the more I just realize we've got to help people

713
00:39:20,600 --> 00:39:23,600
Speaker 2: with a framework because we don't get this manual on

714
00:39:23,680 --> 00:39:26,480
Speaker 2: how we work, and we're fricking complicated and complex, and

715
00:39:26,520 --> 00:39:29,480
Speaker 2: we're becoming more so with tech and AI and there's

716
00:39:29,520 --> 00:39:31,440
Speaker 2: a whole bunch of stuff on that as well.

717
00:39:31,440 --> 00:39:31,720
Speaker 1: AI.

718
00:39:31,920 --> 00:39:34,080
Speaker 2: Yes it's helping you be more productive, but it's killing

719
00:39:34,120 --> 00:39:36,680
Speaker 2: your brain if you don't work it. But we really

720
00:39:36,680 --> 00:39:38,920
Speaker 2: do just need to sometimes come back to fundamentals and

721
00:39:38,960 --> 00:39:40,960
Speaker 2: go what is it like, what is going to make

722
00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:43,440
Speaker 2: me happy or fulfilled? And what is success to me?

723
00:39:44,920 --> 00:39:48,759
Speaker 2: And then reverse engineer it, set your life up for

724
00:39:48,800 --> 00:39:53,040
Speaker 2: it rather than just getting into this slipstream before you

725
00:39:53,080 --> 00:39:56,680
Speaker 2: realize you wake up ten, twenty thirty, forty fifty years

726
00:39:56,760 --> 00:40:00,920
Speaker 2: later living someone else's life and go, shit, what was that.

727
00:40:02,080 --> 00:40:05,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, look, I think that's a great question to ask,

728
00:40:05,440 --> 00:40:08,640
Speaker 1: and I think another question to ask, so one from Andrew,

729
00:40:08,760 --> 00:40:12,799
Speaker 1: one from Harps. My question is what are your values?

730
00:40:13,440 --> 00:40:16,480
Speaker 1: And is your life a reflection of those values? So

731
00:40:16,560 --> 00:40:19,319
Speaker 1: for me, values are just the things that matter to

732
00:40:19,400 --> 00:40:21,960
Speaker 1: you most, and you can't get it wrong because they're

733
00:40:22,000 --> 00:40:25,480
Speaker 1: your values. But so I would say for me, things

734
00:40:25,560 --> 00:40:28,640
Speaker 1: like you know, physical mental, emotional health, that's a value,

735
00:40:29,160 --> 00:40:32,600
Speaker 1: looking after people that I love, my parents, being elderly

736
00:40:32,719 --> 00:40:36,400
Speaker 1: right now, that's probably my number one value at the moment.

737
00:40:37,080 --> 00:40:39,240
Speaker 1: Having a purpose bigger than me, and being of service,

738
00:40:39,280 --> 00:40:41,480
Speaker 1: which Andrews spoke about, that's a value for me. So

739
00:40:41,640 --> 00:40:44,840
Speaker 1: I think, you know, and it sounds cheesy and cliche

740
00:40:44,960 --> 00:40:46,880
Speaker 1: and we can all go, oh, yeah, of course it is,

741
00:40:46,920 --> 00:40:49,399
Speaker 1: because you're on a fucking podcast. I get that too.

742
00:40:49,560 --> 00:40:52,160
Speaker 1: I get that too. And have I ever been a selfish,

743
00:40:52,239 --> 00:40:57,799
Speaker 1: self centered, thoughtless, lacking empathy. Have I ever Yes, sure have,

744
00:40:58,480 --> 00:41:00,800
Speaker 1: Sure have? Do I ever do that? Now? Sure?

745
00:41:00,840 --> 00:41:00,880
Speaker 2: Do?

746
00:41:01,480 --> 00:41:03,680
Speaker 1: I try not to. I try to be more aware.

747
00:41:04,280 --> 00:41:06,520
Speaker 1: I am one of the most flawed people I know,

748
00:41:07,400 --> 00:41:09,680
Speaker 1: but I'm okay to say that, and I'm a work

749
00:41:09,719 --> 00:41:13,440
Speaker 1: in progress. But what having clarity about our values does.

750
00:41:14,360 --> 00:41:18,160
Speaker 1: It helps us make decisions as we navigate life. Where

751
00:41:18,160 --> 00:41:21,600
Speaker 1: we go, Oh, here's an opportunity, or here's a decision

752
00:41:21,640 --> 00:41:23,640
Speaker 1: I've got to make, or here's a situation I've got

753
00:41:23,640 --> 00:41:27,000
Speaker 1: to deal with. Well, these are my values, so it's clear.

754
00:41:27,160 --> 00:41:29,120
Speaker 1: It's clear what I need to do or not do.

755
00:41:29,400 --> 00:41:34,200
Speaker 1: It's not easy because sometimes some of those opportunities are

756
00:41:34,200 --> 00:41:37,960
Speaker 1: financially rewarding, but they don't align with my values. And

757
00:41:38,040 --> 00:41:39,880
Speaker 1: I think we've spoken about this, but I've had a

758
00:41:39,960 --> 00:41:44,239
Speaker 1: number of probably five or six or seven really good

759
00:41:44,280 --> 00:41:47,319
Speaker 1: commercial opportunities on my show that I couldn't take. They

760
00:41:47,320 --> 00:41:50,560
Speaker 1: were financially good opportunities, but they didn't They just didn't

761
00:41:50,600 --> 00:41:53,000
Speaker 1: align with what I think and what I believe, and

762
00:41:53,440 --> 00:41:56,719
Speaker 1: I definitely couldn't sell that stuff. So I went, I

763
00:41:56,719 --> 00:41:59,480
Speaker 1: would love your dough, but I can't sell your stuff.

764
00:42:00,360 --> 00:42:04,080
Speaker 1: And so was it easy? No? Was it clear? Though?

765
00:42:04,200 --> 00:42:07,160
Speaker 2: Absolutely it's now a perfect segaway. We're going to take

766
00:42:07,160 --> 00:42:09,440
Speaker 2: an AD and we'll be back to the program shortly.

767
00:42:09,920 --> 00:42:12,600
Speaker 2: This program with Craig Harper is sponsored by hard Rock

768
00:42:12,640 --> 00:42:15,640
Speaker 2: Correct Ol dysfunction Treatment. You're having problem getting.

769
00:42:19,520 --> 00:42:21,919
Speaker 1: Well? That I would certainly sponsor that.

770
00:42:22,239 --> 00:42:26,359
Speaker 2: I I want you then going, Hey, shiny head, didn't

771
00:42:26,360 --> 00:42:28,720
Speaker 2: tell me he's now bringing ads in. You were thinking

772
00:42:28,719 --> 00:42:33,279
Speaker 2: this guy's gone next level? Hey bringing it an AD?

773
00:42:33,360 --> 00:42:36,960
Speaker 2: Not talking about hard rock? Well close enough, hard.

774
00:42:36,760 --> 00:42:40,360
Speaker 1: Rock hard something. And yes, it's.

775
00:42:40,760 --> 00:42:43,600
Speaker 2: Well, that's where we were going, wasn't that. Yes, that's right.

776
00:42:44,000 --> 00:42:44,880
Speaker 1: See what you do to me.

777
00:42:44,960 --> 00:42:47,839
Speaker 2: You make me feel intelligent and playful and silly all

778
00:42:47,840 --> 00:42:51,000
Speaker 2: at once. Harps, you're an influence on all sides of

779
00:42:51,040 --> 00:42:51,959
Speaker 2: my spectrums.

780
00:42:53,000 --> 00:42:56,000
Speaker 1: Don't blame me for your bad behavior. You take responsibility.

781
00:42:56,480 --> 00:42:58,239
Speaker 2: We've both gone a little bit red, or I would

782
00:42:58,280 --> 00:43:01,480
Speaker 2: take a breath. Rip Van Winkle a fictational character from

783
00:43:01,480 --> 00:43:04,480
Speaker 2: a short story by a dude named Washington Irving published

784
00:43:04,480 --> 00:43:06,440
Speaker 2: back in the eighteen hundred. Somewhere you know the Rip

785
00:43:06,480 --> 00:43:09,440
Speaker 2: van Winkle story is an easy going dude. This is

786
00:43:10,200 --> 00:43:12,400
Speaker 2: I actually dug this up because I've been saying for

787
00:43:12,440 --> 00:43:16,160
Speaker 2: a long time. Rip Van Winkle. It takes fifteen twenty

788
00:43:16,239 --> 00:43:18,359
Speaker 2: years to become an overnight success. But I'd never looked

789
00:43:18,400 --> 00:43:20,760
Speaker 2: at the origin story. Do you know the origin story?

790
00:43:21,560 --> 00:43:24,319
Speaker 1: Tell me that, Like, I know of the story, but

791
00:43:24,440 --> 00:43:26,360
Speaker 1: I really don't know the story story.

792
00:43:26,440 --> 00:43:28,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, so I thought, in preparation for chatting to you,

793
00:43:28,600 --> 00:43:30,520
Speaker 2: I'm going to use Rip van Winkle. I better actually

794
00:43:30,520 --> 00:43:33,040
Speaker 2: find out about the old Vans to himself. So this

795
00:43:33,640 --> 00:43:37,120
Speaker 2: is what the information says. Rip is an easy going

796
00:43:37,160 --> 00:43:40,720
Speaker 2: man who wanted to escape his nagging wife. Please, any

797
00:43:40,760 --> 00:43:43,279
Speaker 2: of our audience, do not shoot the messenger. This is

798
00:43:43,280 --> 00:43:47,000
Speaker 2: what I was saying. By wandering into the mountains, he

799
00:43:47,080 --> 00:43:49,560
Speaker 2: had some mysterious liquor given to him by strange men.

800
00:43:49,600 --> 00:43:51,920
Speaker 2: He fell asleep, and he woke up twenty years later.

801
00:43:52,560 --> 00:43:54,920
Speaker 2: When he returned to his village, everything had changed, including

802
00:43:54,920 --> 00:43:57,480
Speaker 2: the fact the American Revolution had taken place and people

803
00:43:57,520 --> 00:44:01,920
Speaker 2: barely recognized him. He felt fus and out of time. However,

804
00:44:02,400 --> 00:44:05,280
Speaker 2: the overnight success part of this relates to a metaphor

805
00:44:05,440 --> 00:44:08,719
Speaker 2: used to highlight the illusion that someone becomes successful out

806
00:44:08,760 --> 00:44:11,600
Speaker 2: of nowhere, or the public perception of a sudden transformation

807
00:44:11,719 --> 00:44:14,520
Speaker 2: without acknowledging the long passage of time. And the changes

808
00:44:14,560 --> 00:44:17,480
Speaker 2: that happened quietly in the background. So Rip comes back

809
00:44:17,520 --> 00:44:19,960
Speaker 2: and it's changed massively because he's been asleep so he

810
00:44:20,000 --> 00:44:22,400
Speaker 2: didn't actually see the subtle changes. And it's also the

811
00:44:22,440 --> 00:44:24,680
Speaker 2: idea of waking up one day to discover the world.

812
00:44:24,760 --> 00:44:28,040
Speaker 2: Finally sees your success, Rip and be involved in a

813
00:44:28,040 --> 00:44:30,120
Speaker 2: fair bit of planning in the town in the early days,

814
00:44:30,400 --> 00:44:33,400
Speaker 2: even though the process had been happening the whole time.

815
00:44:34,040 --> 00:44:37,000
Speaker 2: So the Rip van Winkle effect LinkedIn to Craig Harper.

816
00:44:37,920 --> 00:44:40,880
Speaker 2: Just give our audience who don't know you, just a

817
00:44:40,920 --> 00:44:43,560
Speaker 2: bit of a highlight of some of the successes and

818
00:44:43,600 --> 00:44:46,719
Speaker 2: stuff ups you've had. How many podcasts, how many businesses?

819
00:44:47,480 --> 00:44:52,480
Speaker 2: Really point because because someone you've got one of the

820
00:44:52,480 --> 00:44:56,920
Speaker 2: most downloaded podcasts in Australia. Awesome success, great speaking business.

821
00:44:56,920 --> 00:44:58,040
Speaker 2: But give us the reality.

822
00:44:58,840 --> 00:45:04,320
Speaker 1: So I get about between six and eight million views

823
00:45:04,480 --> 00:45:07,279
Speaker 1: every thirty days on my Instagram, so that's pretty good.

824
00:45:07,719 --> 00:45:10,799
Speaker 1: I've written seven books. I've worked on in Telli. I

825
00:45:10,800 --> 00:45:14,719
Speaker 1: worked on Channel ten on a show called The Dave

826
00:45:14,800 --> 00:45:17,040
Speaker 1: and Kimshow Morning Show for three years. I did a

827
00:45:17,040 --> 00:45:20,120
Speaker 1: weekly spot on there. I worked in commercial radio, set

828
00:45:20,160 --> 00:45:23,239
Speaker 1: up the first personal training centers in Australia. As you

829
00:45:23,280 --> 00:45:26,440
Speaker 1: alluded to wrote the first course. I didn't go to

830
00:45:26,520 --> 00:45:28,560
Speaker 1: UNI til I was thirty six for the first time.

831
00:45:28,600 --> 00:45:30,680
Speaker 1: So there's some encouragement for you old and want to

832
00:45:30,719 --> 00:45:34,200
Speaker 1: be students. Spoken all over the world, spoken in about

833
00:45:34,200 --> 00:45:39,880
Speaker 1: thirty countries. Yeah, and like just a lot of fun stuff.

834
00:45:40,040 --> 00:45:43,759
Speaker 1: And for me, I feel like my biggest achievement in

835
00:45:43,800 --> 00:45:47,360
Speaker 1: this kind of workspace is creating a model of work

836
00:45:47,360 --> 00:45:51,640
Speaker 1: that doesn't feel like work, like I genuinely just love

837
00:45:51,760 --> 00:45:54,759
Speaker 1: the stuff that I do. And the other day I

838
00:45:54,800 --> 00:45:57,839
Speaker 1: went into State and I got stopped twice, once at

839
00:45:57,840 --> 00:46:05,400
Speaker 1: Brisbane and once here in and both people said essentially, harps,

840
00:46:05,480 --> 00:46:09,640
Speaker 1: follow you stuff, love you stuff. You're great, so appreciate you.

841
00:46:09,760 --> 00:46:12,160
Speaker 1: I know you don't know me, but you've had an

842
00:46:12,200 --> 00:46:15,680
Speaker 1: impact in my life and thanks. And one of them

843
00:46:15,760 --> 00:46:18,520
Speaker 1: was a dude, the other one was lady. And he goes,

844
00:46:18,640 --> 00:46:20,480
Speaker 1: can I give you a hug? I'm like, fuck, bring

845
00:46:20,520 --> 00:46:23,000
Speaker 1: it in, bro, you know. So I'm at the airport,

846
00:46:23,120 --> 00:46:25,680
Speaker 1: I'm hugging a dude. I got. I didn't cry, but

847
00:46:25,719 --> 00:46:28,000
Speaker 1: I was about fucking two nine to oh seconds away

848
00:46:28,000 --> 00:46:30,720
Speaker 1: from crying. And I got on the plane and I thought,

849
00:46:30,800 --> 00:46:33,600
Speaker 1: this is why I love my life, Like he was

850
00:46:33,760 --> 00:46:36,320
Speaker 1: this dude to struggle with addiction and all this stuff,

851
00:46:36,360 --> 00:46:38,520
Speaker 1: and he's just in a really good place. And clearly

852
00:46:38,800 --> 00:46:40,880
Speaker 1: I didn't do the work. He did the work, clearly,

853
00:46:41,280 --> 00:46:43,480
Speaker 1: but just being a little part of that journey for me,

854
00:46:44,400 --> 00:46:48,200
Speaker 1: you know that that stuff is, you know, that's always

855
00:46:48,640 --> 00:46:53,000
Speaker 1: for me, like way more meaningful than, you know than

856
00:46:53,080 --> 00:46:57,800
Speaker 1: any kind of financial reward or commercial success. But yeah,

857
00:46:57,880 --> 00:46:59,840
Speaker 1: so lots of stuff, lots of years.

858
00:47:00,960 --> 00:47:03,480
Speaker 2: And then if you were a record, that's your top

859
00:47:03,560 --> 00:47:06,879
Speaker 2: hits at the A side, flip the record over, what's

860
00:47:06,920 --> 00:47:08,879
Speaker 2: the B side? What are some of the stuff ups

861
00:47:08,880 --> 00:47:11,319
Speaker 2: and the setbacks? How many different podcasts did you have

862
00:47:11,400 --> 00:47:13,000
Speaker 2: until you got you projects?

863
00:47:13,040 --> 00:47:16,160
Speaker 1: Yeah? So I had three shows that didn't work. Even

864
00:47:16,200 --> 00:47:18,799
Speaker 1: the first two hundred shows of the U Project, I

865
00:47:18,880 --> 00:47:22,160
Speaker 1: was losing money. Oh yeah. I mean my theory is

866
00:47:22,200 --> 00:47:24,560
Speaker 1: you can't become a black belt without being a white belt, right.

867
00:47:24,600 --> 00:47:27,440
Speaker 1: You can't get good at what you won't do. You

868
00:47:27,480 --> 00:47:31,480
Speaker 1: can't master what you avoid. So everything that I started

869
00:47:31,600 --> 00:47:36,560
Speaker 1: initially I was either absolutely fucking terrible or very mediocre.

870
00:47:37,320 --> 00:47:39,000
Speaker 1: But how do you get good? Will you get good

871
00:47:39,040 --> 00:47:42,040
Speaker 1: by keep showing up? You know, keeping showing up. So

872
00:47:42,960 --> 00:47:46,680
Speaker 1: I remember my first speaking gig. I was twenty six.

873
00:47:47,000 --> 00:47:49,640
Speaker 1: It was in a timber yard. It was to thirty

874
00:47:49,680 --> 00:47:53,520
Speaker 1: employees in their lunch room. The guy that I owned

875
00:47:53,520 --> 00:47:58,600
Speaker 1: the timberyard was one of my pt clients. I was terrible.

876
00:47:59,520 --> 00:48:04,040
Speaker 1: I was absolutely shitting myself. I couldn't string four words together.

877
00:48:04,160 --> 00:48:06,480
Speaker 1: They hated me, they hated it. They couldn't get out

878
00:48:06,520 --> 00:48:09,520
Speaker 1: of there quick enough. But I had this weird sense

879
00:48:09,560 --> 00:48:11,480
Speaker 1: of Okay, I've done one. That's the worst I'm going

880
00:48:11,560 --> 00:48:14,160
Speaker 1: to be. And that was the worst I ever was, right,

881
00:48:14,200 --> 00:48:16,880
Speaker 1: and and then there was still a lot of stuff up.

882
00:48:17,200 --> 00:48:21,279
Speaker 1: Like you have to be. If your compass is set

883
00:48:21,360 --> 00:48:27,800
Speaker 1: on comfort and instant gratification and certainty and familiarity, that's

884
00:48:28,120 --> 00:48:31,960
Speaker 1: the best possible way to not develop, to not grow,

885
00:48:32,080 --> 00:48:34,759
Speaker 1: to not learn, to not build understanding, awareness and resilience.

886
00:48:34,800 --> 00:48:38,400
Speaker 1: So I've made way more fuck ups than I've had successes.

887
00:48:39,160 --> 00:48:42,080
Speaker 1: But when you you know, as we do, we reframe

888
00:48:42,120 --> 00:48:43,960
Speaker 1: shit and you go, yeah, but what did you learn? Well?

889
00:48:44,000 --> 00:48:46,440
Speaker 1: I actually learned a bunch of stuff, Like I learned

890
00:48:46,800 --> 00:48:49,920
Speaker 1: setting up harpers. Right. There were no personal training centers.

891
00:48:50,360 --> 00:48:52,920
Speaker 1: There wasn't even a course or an accreditation. There was

892
00:48:52,960 --> 00:48:56,560
Speaker 1: an insurance like nobody I'm setting up this thing. I

893
00:48:56,560 --> 00:49:00,279
Speaker 1: don't even have a single person in a country of whatever.

894
00:49:00,320 --> 00:49:02,920
Speaker 1: It was then twenty million that I can ask for

895
00:49:03,000 --> 00:49:07,160
Speaker 1: advice because no one's done it. And I'm twenty five

896
00:49:07,239 --> 00:49:10,719
Speaker 1: or twenty six at the time. I'm not a businessman.

897
00:49:11,239 --> 00:49:14,279
Speaker 1: I don't have a degree. I don't understand leadership. I

898
00:49:14,280 --> 00:49:18,000
Speaker 1: don't understand dealing with counsels and lawyers, and I don't

899
00:49:18,320 --> 00:49:21,000
Speaker 1: you know, like it was just dive in the deep end.

900
00:49:21,080 --> 00:49:24,080
Speaker 1: He actually can't swim, but hopefully he won't drown, and

901
00:49:24,160 --> 00:49:27,040
Speaker 1: I so nearly drowned a hundred times. But you know,

902
00:49:27,120 --> 00:49:28,160
Speaker 1: that's kind of what makes you.

903
00:49:28,880 --> 00:49:32,640
Speaker 2: And any person who's had success over a sustained period

904
00:49:32,680 --> 00:49:34,520
Speaker 2: of time is going to say the same thing. It

905
00:49:34,600 --> 00:49:40,040
Speaker 2: wasn't just rocket ship taking off. It's set back cardship,

906
00:49:40,160 --> 00:49:43,400
Speaker 2: motivation fuel, but was sort of come back to hopefully

907
00:49:43,440 --> 00:49:46,920
Speaker 2: a link to where we were before, knowing what's important

908
00:49:46,960 --> 00:49:50,800
Speaker 2: for you, being values aligned, it's going to be the

909
00:49:50,840 --> 00:49:52,759
Speaker 2: rocket fuel that keeps you going. Because if it's just

910
00:49:52,800 --> 00:49:55,600
Speaker 2: all for the clickbait, Hey I've got this many likes,

911
00:49:55,640 --> 00:49:58,120
Speaker 2: what makes me feel good? That stuff's going to run

912
00:49:58,120 --> 00:50:01,240
Speaker 2: out very very quickly. Isn't it as a fuel source?

913
00:50:02,160 --> 00:50:07,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, definitely, definitely. I think you need to be, you know,

914
00:50:07,600 --> 00:50:14,680
Speaker 1: intrinsically motivated and really that. Like I was an only child,

915
00:50:14,760 --> 00:50:17,240
Speaker 1: I was insecure. I had I don't know if actually

916
00:50:17,280 --> 00:50:19,080
Speaker 1: had a bigger ego, but I was very insecure. I

917
00:50:19,120 --> 00:50:22,239
Speaker 1: was very fearful, and I was probably sociologically kind of

918
00:50:22,280 --> 00:50:25,400
Speaker 1: needy because I didn't have brothers and sisters. And my

919
00:50:25,520 --> 00:50:28,520
Speaker 1: mum and dad were amazing still are amazing people, but

920
00:50:29,360 --> 00:50:32,800
Speaker 1: ironically we were never super close. It was like growing

921
00:50:32,880 --> 00:50:34,920
Speaker 1: up in my house was like living with an auntie

922
00:50:34,920 --> 00:50:39,160
Speaker 1: and uncle that were great, right, It wasn't. There wasn't

923
00:50:39,200 --> 00:50:45,520
Speaker 1: this super close, emotional, warm, fuzzy connection. So yeah, I

924
00:50:46,040 --> 00:50:49,520
Speaker 1: was a pretty insecure and I would say, you know,

925
00:50:49,640 --> 00:50:52,160
Speaker 1: I probably still got bullshit going on, but up until

926
00:50:52,200 --> 00:50:57,600
Speaker 1: I was thirty, I was really like psychologically and emotionally

927
00:50:57,719 --> 00:51:01,640
Speaker 1: dealing with stuff on a daily basis while role playing

928
00:51:02,400 --> 00:51:04,600
Speaker 1: you know, the cool, confident guy to the world.

929
00:51:05,400 --> 00:51:09,239
Speaker 2: I genuinely mean what I'm about to say. I am

930
00:51:09,239 --> 00:51:12,319
Speaker 2: glad you pushed through. I really am, because you're you're

931
00:51:12,760 --> 00:51:15,279
Speaker 2: been a mentor and inspiration to me. You think I

932
00:51:15,320 --> 00:51:17,279
Speaker 2: was going to take the piece. Then I really remember

933
00:51:17,280 --> 00:51:18,239
Speaker 2: what I'm about to say.

934
00:51:18,360 --> 00:51:20,640
Speaker 1: I was hoping you are to get serious. Why don't

935
00:51:20,680 --> 00:51:24,000
Speaker 1: you get serious? I don't know where to Let's let's

936
00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:26,640
Speaker 1: do the one I generally mean. I'm about to say

937
00:51:26,640 --> 00:51:29,680
Speaker 1: you're an absolute tool Harps and we love. That's better.

938
00:51:30,280 --> 00:51:32,960
Speaker 2: Isn't it funny that I'm more comfortable with that. I've

939
00:51:33,000 --> 00:51:35,800
Speaker 2: had this chat before and I didn't do that purposely.

940
00:51:35,880 --> 00:51:39,520
Speaker 2: But let me let me say you have been a

941
00:51:39,560 --> 00:51:41,800
Speaker 2: real mentor of mine. And the mentor doesn't have to

942
00:51:41,800 --> 00:51:44,040
Speaker 2: be someone live. You can get a mentor through a

943
00:51:44,080 --> 00:51:47,680
Speaker 2: podcast or through a book. But the origin I came

944
00:51:47,760 --> 00:51:51,120
Speaker 2: up to you, I was twenty five, full head of hair, fitness, confidence,

945
00:51:51,160 --> 00:51:53,120
Speaker 2: you know the story, and said, oh you're Craig harper

946
00:51:53,560 --> 00:51:55,880
Speaker 2: manre may and from Hobart. Can I have a chat?

947
00:51:56,120 --> 00:51:56,319
Speaker 1: Said?

948
00:51:56,360 --> 00:51:58,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, look, have a lunch, come walk with me. So

949
00:51:59,160 --> 00:52:01,160
Speaker 2: you you opened up then. I don't know how many

950
00:52:01,160 --> 00:52:03,879
Speaker 2: thousands of people you've opened up to your studio. I've

951
00:52:03,880 --> 00:52:05,920
Speaker 2: heard a similar story from a whole bunch of people.

952
00:52:05,960 --> 00:52:09,280
Speaker 2: You're very giving. I'm really grateful that you pushed through

953
00:52:09,560 --> 00:52:12,160
Speaker 2: because you've done the hard work, You've the rip Van

954
00:52:12,239 --> 00:52:14,960
Speaker 2: Winkle time to too and a bit more and then

955
00:52:15,040 --> 00:52:17,680
Speaker 2: you have the compound interest. But I want to talk

956
00:52:17,680 --> 00:52:19,880
Speaker 2: about one topic before we wrap up, and that's the

957
00:52:19,920 --> 00:52:23,440
Speaker 2: notion of when do you know enough is enough?

958
00:52:23,480 --> 00:52:24,719
Speaker 1: And I walk away.

959
00:52:25,160 --> 00:52:29,120
Speaker 2: Because more discretionary effort, more time invested in this, it's

960
00:52:29,120 --> 00:52:32,319
Speaker 2: actually not going to help. So will There's glory in persistence.

961
00:52:32,360 --> 00:52:36,720
Speaker 2: There's also wisdom in pivoting and knowing the difference around

962
00:52:36,719 --> 00:52:41,640
Speaker 2: what separates obsession from evolution is really really important. I

963
00:52:41,680 --> 00:52:43,920
Speaker 2: have an example personally for me. It was running. I

964
00:52:43,960 --> 00:52:47,879
Speaker 2: stopped running at twenty eight. I had two goals, break

965
00:52:47,920 --> 00:52:49,800
Speaker 2: the four minute mile and to go to the Olympics,

966
00:52:49,800 --> 00:52:52,480
Speaker 2: and I did neither. Could have I run faster?

967
00:52:52,600 --> 00:52:53,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, I reckon.

968
00:52:53,120 --> 00:52:55,439
Speaker 2: I could have got my fifteen hundred time down maybe

969
00:52:55,440 --> 00:52:58,200
Speaker 2: another four or five seconds would have taken a couple

970
00:52:58,239 --> 00:53:03,040
Speaker 2: of years. Did I have the heart, share, passion, commitment,

971
00:53:03,120 --> 00:53:04,040
Speaker 2: disciplined to do that?

972
00:53:04,120 --> 00:53:04,319
Speaker 1: God?

973
00:53:04,440 --> 00:53:07,840
Speaker 2: Now, I had just run out of energy. So the

974
00:53:08,160 --> 00:53:11,560
Speaker 2: best thing for me at that stage was actually the stop.

975
00:53:11,760 --> 00:53:15,400
Speaker 2: And this is interesting Harps as far as having a

976
00:53:15,600 --> 00:53:17,680
Speaker 2: career and a life outside of just being a runner.

977
00:53:18,080 --> 00:53:21,920
Speaker 2: Mental toughness is misconstrued as just being about resilience and

978
00:53:22,000 --> 00:53:25,799
Speaker 2: grips and hardiness and all those construct William Wallace.

979
00:53:25,520 --> 00:53:26,880
Speaker 1: But they won't take our freedom.

980
00:53:27,239 --> 00:53:31,319
Speaker 2: He charged or she charged through fiery furnace and save

981
00:53:31,480 --> 00:53:36,120
Speaker 2: the people and the children. But mental toughness. The other

982
00:53:36,160 --> 00:53:39,000
Speaker 2: side of mental toughness is knowing when to give up,

983
00:53:39,239 --> 00:53:42,080
Speaker 2: because that frees you up to go into other areas.

984
00:53:42,960 --> 00:53:45,239
Speaker 1: Yeah, I would reframe it. I wouldn't say giving up.

985
00:53:46,239 --> 00:53:50,600
Speaker 1: I think I know what you're saying, but I would

986
00:53:50,600 --> 00:53:56,880
Speaker 1: be like, yeah, doesn't have the same kind of feel

987
00:53:56,880 --> 00:54:00,239
Speaker 1: for me anymore. It's not that important anymore. It doesn't

988
00:54:00,320 --> 00:54:03,000
Speaker 1: matter to me enough. It did matter a lot once,

989
00:54:03,120 --> 00:54:06,520
Speaker 1: it doesn't now. When I do a cost benefit analysis

990
00:54:06,600 --> 00:54:09,920
Speaker 1: on how much I need to invest in this to

991
00:54:10,040 --> 00:54:12,960
Speaker 1: potentially maybe move the needle a little bit, and what

992
00:54:13,040 --> 00:54:17,279
Speaker 1: the outcome or the benefit might be, it's really not

993
00:54:17,440 --> 00:54:20,560
Speaker 1: worth it. Like I walked away from personal training and

994
00:54:21,080 --> 00:54:24,160
Speaker 1: I was pretty good at it, and I could charge

995
00:54:24,200 --> 00:54:27,759
Speaker 1: stupid money, but it's not It had its I think

996
00:54:27,960 --> 00:54:30,520
Speaker 1: things have a use by date, mate. I feel like

997
00:54:31,360 --> 00:54:34,359
Speaker 1: they have a psychological and emotional used by date for us.

998
00:54:34,400 --> 00:54:36,319
Speaker 1: Where I go that used to blow my socks off,

999
00:54:36,320 --> 00:54:39,479
Speaker 1: it doesn't anymore. That doesn't mean everything's got to blow

1000
00:54:39,520 --> 00:54:42,400
Speaker 1: my socks off that I do. But if I'm talking about,

1001
00:54:42,440 --> 00:54:44,120
Speaker 1: you know, what's going to keep me in the game

1002
00:54:44,160 --> 00:54:47,800
Speaker 1: and excited and a bit focused and all of that stuff,

1003
00:54:48,320 --> 00:54:51,200
Speaker 1: then you know it's got to be something that I

1004
00:54:51,320 --> 00:54:55,160
Speaker 1: really want to be pursuing. But the other side of that,

1005
00:54:55,239 --> 00:54:57,000
Speaker 1: of course, is you know, well, what are the things

1006
00:54:57,000 --> 00:54:59,719
Speaker 1: that I need to do to, for example, be a

1007
00:54:59,719 --> 00:55:03,319
Speaker 1: good so to look after my Well, that's just not

1008
00:55:03,440 --> 00:55:06,120
Speaker 1: about me. That's not about what I want. That's about

1009
00:55:06,120 --> 00:55:08,239
Speaker 1: what I need to do to meet my mum and

1010
00:55:08,320 --> 00:55:11,520
Speaker 1: dad's needs. Right. But I think if we're talking more

1011
00:55:11,560 --> 00:55:13,560
Speaker 1: from a career point of view or a trying to

1012
00:55:13,560 --> 00:55:16,640
Speaker 1: become an Olympic runner point of view, or I think,

1013
00:55:16,680 --> 00:55:19,040
Speaker 1: you know, I think we have this innate knowledge and

1014
00:55:19,080 --> 00:55:21,799
Speaker 1: wisdom that we go no, mate, that's you're probably not

1015
00:55:21,840 --> 00:55:24,319
Speaker 1: going to run sub four minutes, or you might, but

1016
00:55:24,360 --> 00:55:27,239
Speaker 1: it could take you five years, and whether or not

1017
00:55:27,320 --> 00:55:30,360
Speaker 1: that is the best investment of five years, you probably

1018
00:55:30,440 --> 00:55:31,120
Speaker 1: know it's not.

1019
00:55:32,719 --> 00:55:37,080
Speaker 2: And do you have that grit duckworth definition perseverance and

1020
00:55:37,120 --> 00:55:41,000
Speaker 2: passion And I found I had neither. I think that's

1021
00:55:41,040 --> 00:55:43,239
Speaker 2: a good filter to run like if you really want

1022
00:55:43,280 --> 00:55:46,400
Speaker 2: to go hard and keep going, are you passionate about it?

1023
00:55:46,480 --> 00:55:49,040
Speaker 2: Do you think you can continue to persevere? So rather

1024
00:55:49,080 --> 00:55:51,760
Speaker 2: than giving up. I like that that correction on the words.

1025
00:55:51,800 --> 00:55:54,160
Speaker 2: It's more around a pivot or an evolution to what's next.

1026
00:55:54,840 --> 00:55:58,799
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean like if I said to you, I

1027
00:55:58,840 --> 00:56:00,440
Speaker 1: actually don't know what the answers got to be. I

1028
00:56:00,480 --> 00:56:04,239
Speaker 1: think I do. Somebody asked me this years ago, and

1029
00:56:04,320 --> 00:56:07,279
Speaker 1: I answered straight away, and they're like, really, I go absolutely,

1030
00:56:07,400 --> 00:56:10,480
Speaker 1: And they said, okay, so tonight you can talk to

1031
00:56:10,520 --> 00:56:13,560
Speaker 1: one hundred people and you're going to get paid twenty grand,

1032
00:56:14,600 --> 00:56:17,480
Speaker 1: or over the road at Rod Laver Arena, you can

1033
00:56:17,520 --> 00:56:20,000
Speaker 1: talk to ten thousand people for free. What do you choose?

1034
00:56:20,000 --> 00:56:23,040
Speaker 1: I go, Rod Laver Arena. I go, but I want

1035
00:56:23,040 --> 00:56:25,000
Speaker 1: three or four hours with them, not a I don't

1036
00:56:25,000 --> 00:56:29,360
Speaker 1: want to do a keynote because and even let's say,

1037
00:56:29,480 --> 00:56:32,600
Speaker 1: and by the way, there's zero chance Craig, that following

1038
00:56:32,640 --> 00:56:34,840
Speaker 1: that three or four hours with those ten thousand people,

1039
00:56:34,840 --> 00:56:38,440
Speaker 1: that there's any commercial benefit for you, right, I'm like, yes,

1040
00:56:38,920 --> 00:56:42,400
Speaker 1: I don't want anything, just time with those people me

1041
00:56:42,600 --> 00:56:45,000
Speaker 1: now where I am and back then, That's what I

1042
00:56:45,000 --> 00:56:49,359
Speaker 1: would choose because that's just the for me. That's the

1043
00:56:49,480 --> 00:56:52,640
Speaker 1: currency that matters. And I know that sounds cheesy, but

1044
00:56:53,120 --> 00:56:54,680
Speaker 1: and yes, you've got to pay the bills, and you've

1045
00:56:54,680 --> 00:56:56,080
Speaker 1: got to feed the kids, and you've got to pay

1046
00:56:56,120 --> 00:56:57,759
Speaker 1: for school fees, and you've got to put gas in

1047
00:56:57,800 --> 00:56:59,759
Speaker 1: the car, and I get it, and of course those

1048
00:56:59,760 --> 00:57:03,960
Speaker 1: things matter. And of course I am privileged. I realize

1049
00:57:03,960 --> 00:57:07,040
Speaker 1: I'm privileged and lucky or blessed or whatever you want

1050
00:57:07,040 --> 00:57:09,919
Speaker 1: to call it, that I'm in a position where it's

1051
00:57:09,960 --> 00:57:13,080
Speaker 1: not weak to weak desperate kind of finances, you know.

1052
00:57:13,880 --> 00:57:16,360
Speaker 1: But yeah, that's how much I love this. And when

1053
00:57:16,400 --> 00:57:19,680
Speaker 1: I met you all those years ago, and again this

1054
00:57:19,720 --> 00:57:23,880
Speaker 1: sounds like bullshit, but I realized really early that if

1055
00:57:23,880 --> 00:57:26,200
Speaker 1: I was selfish, one, I wasn't a great person to

1056
00:57:26,200 --> 00:57:28,959
Speaker 1: be around. Two, I didn't like me. And the best

1057
00:57:29,040 --> 00:57:31,400
Speaker 1: version of me is the version of me that wants

1058
00:57:31,480 --> 00:57:33,920
Speaker 1: you to be great for no reason other than I

1059
00:57:33,960 --> 00:57:36,800
Speaker 1: want you to be great. I want you to succeed.

1060
00:57:37,040 --> 00:57:40,320
Speaker 1: Even if I fail, I want you to succeed. And

1061
00:57:41,120 --> 00:57:42,880
Speaker 1: you know, there's a thing, there's a term, here's a

1062
00:57:43,000 --> 00:57:45,479
Speaker 1: term for you. You've taught me, what t you taught

1063
00:57:45,520 --> 00:57:48,920
Speaker 1: me inspirare today I wrote it down. I'm teaching you one.

1064
00:57:48,960 --> 00:57:50,920
Speaker 1: It's called sharden freuder. Have you heard that?

1065
00:57:51,320 --> 00:57:53,080
Speaker 2: The opposite that would be mitfreuder.

1066
00:57:55,120 --> 00:57:56,040
Speaker 1: I don't know what that is.

1067
00:57:56,960 --> 00:58:02,120
Speaker 2: Shaden Freuder is pleasure through other people's misery. Yes, mitfreuder

1068
00:58:03,040 --> 00:58:06,600
Speaker 2: is pleasure through other people's success. You're a mittwell not

1069
00:58:06,640 --> 00:58:07,040
Speaker 2: a shark.

1070
00:58:07,160 --> 00:58:09,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's me. Wow, you taught me something. Yeah, And

1071
00:58:09,560 --> 00:58:14,840
Speaker 1: so for me, that like when I am I'm involved

1072
00:58:14,920 --> 00:58:19,640
Speaker 1: in someone's growth or success or happiness. And again this

1073
00:58:19,680 --> 00:58:24,520
Speaker 1: sounds selfish, It's like it gives me an experience that

1074
00:58:24,720 --> 00:58:28,480
Speaker 1: I can't through doing anything for myself. I can't have that.

1075
00:58:28,920 --> 00:58:31,960
Speaker 1: There's nothing I can get that gives me that feeling

1076
00:58:32,560 --> 00:58:35,720
Speaker 1: of helping you become amazing, or helping you on your

1077
00:58:35,880 --> 00:58:39,360
Speaker 1: supporting you or encouraging you or seeing you do great.

1078
00:58:40,360 --> 00:58:43,400
Speaker 1: And I think that like coming full circle and being

1079
00:58:43,400 --> 00:58:45,360
Speaker 1: a bit weird and deep. Fuck it, I don't care.

1080
00:58:46,480 --> 00:58:48,440
Speaker 1: I got asked on a podcast whose was it? The

1081
00:58:48,480 --> 00:58:51,439
Speaker 1: other day? They said, if you if there was if

1082
00:58:51,480 --> 00:58:54,640
Speaker 1: everything you've ever said, or ever written, or all the

1083
00:58:54,680 --> 00:58:57,160
Speaker 1: stuff that you've put out into the world was deleted,

1084
00:58:57,240 --> 00:59:00,400
Speaker 1: and you could leave us with one message, what would

1085
00:59:00,400 --> 00:59:06,400
Speaker 1: that message be out of everything and not leaning back

1086
00:59:06,440 --> 00:59:12,440
Speaker 1: into anything. I just said, love matters most. And you know,

1087
00:59:12,480 --> 00:59:14,720
Speaker 1: I sat with a friend of mine six months ago

1088
00:59:15,320 --> 00:59:19,880
Speaker 1: who was essentially my second mum. I loved her very

1089
00:59:20,000 --> 00:59:23,160
Speaker 1: very much. She was at death's door. I sat with

1090
00:59:23,200 --> 00:59:27,080
Speaker 1: her in hospital and I held her hand for an

1091
00:59:27,120 --> 00:59:29,560
Speaker 1: hour and a half and we just spoke. There was

1092
00:59:29,560 --> 00:59:31,560
Speaker 1: no one else in the room, and she died about

1093
00:59:31,640 --> 00:59:34,800
Speaker 1: forty eight hours later, and I was sitting with her

1094
00:59:36,440 --> 00:59:38,360
Speaker 1: and I just, I don't know. I don't know what

1095
00:59:38,400 --> 00:59:40,360
Speaker 1: your beliefs are these days. I don't even know what

1096
00:59:40,400 --> 00:59:43,520
Speaker 1: mine are. But I'm like, all the rest is bullshit, Craig,

1097
00:59:44,600 --> 00:59:47,200
Speaker 1: All the rest is just stories that you tell yourself.

1098
00:59:47,240 --> 00:59:49,520
Speaker 1: And it's not all bullshit, of course, But in that moment,

1099
00:59:49,600 --> 00:59:53,040
Speaker 1: I went, all I want to do is be here

1100
00:59:53,160 --> 00:59:58,520
Speaker 1: and love her, and like, it was the most painful

1101
00:59:58,560 --> 01:00:01,880
Speaker 1: and beautiful hour and a half maybe of my life, right,

1102
01:00:02,040 --> 01:00:07,920
Speaker 1: And you like, I invest so much emotional and psychological

1103
01:00:08,240 --> 01:00:13,080
Speaker 1: energy into stuff that really it's you know, I know

1104
01:00:13,160 --> 01:00:16,400
Speaker 1: it's all context dependent, but yeah, I think if we,

1105
01:00:16,680 --> 01:00:18,800
Speaker 1: if we could, and I know this isn't the way

1106
01:00:18,800 --> 01:00:21,600
Speaker 1: the world works, but imagine if we, for the most part,

1107
01:00:22,880 --> 01:00:25,400
Speaker 1: really try to operate from a place of love, and

1108
01:00:25,440 --> 01:00:27,960
Speaker 1: I mean real love. I don't mean conditional love. I

1109
01:00:28,000 --> 01:00:32,440
Speaker 1: don't mean strategic love, because conditional and strategic love are

1110
01:00:32,440 --> 01:00:36,000
Speaker 1: not love. But just where you go. Fuck, I'm happy

1111
01:00:36,000 --> 01:00:38,560
Speaker 1: for you. Fuck, I love you. I want you to

1112
01:00:38,600 --> 01:00:41,760
Speaker 1: do well. You know for me. That's it. That's it,

1113
01:00:41,840 --> 01:00:46,360
Speaker 1: that's that's maybe. That's my answer to what is success.

1114
01:00:47,000 --> 01:00:50,400
Speaker 2: We could riff for hours, and we do. I'm going

1115
01:00:50,440 --> 01:00:56,480
Speaker 2: to start to close this broad ranging discussion. I appreciate you.

1116
01:00:57,240 --> 01:01:00,840
Speaker 2: I really appreciate you. I really appreciate your message and

1117
01:01:00,880 --> 01:01:04,000
Speaker 2: the learnings I have had and continue to have from you.

1118
01:01:05,240 --> 01:01:08,840
Speaker 2: And I appreciate the relationship and the connection we have.

1119
01:01:08,960 --> 01:01:12,160
Speaker 2: And I even reflect on today it is the five

1120
01:01:12,240 --> 01:01:15,960
Speaker 2: deeds of dodgeball, dodge, duck, dive, dip, and dodge. We

1121
01:01:16,040 --> 01:01:19,360
Speaker 2: have talked about everything today, from meta cognition and transcendence

1122
01:01:19,960 --> 01:01:23,800
Speaker 2: right through to erect old dysfunction ads. I'm still cracking

1123
01:01:23,880 --> 01:01:26,600
Speaker 2: up about the look on your face thing, shiny heads

1124
01:01:26,600 --> 01:01:29,200
Speaker 2: putting at it. He didn't even tell me, oh idiot.

1125
01:01:30,800 --> 01:01:32,680
Speaker 2: And the worst part is some people will go the

1126
01:01:32,920 --> 01:01:38,120
Speaker 2: ED stuff was the best. Well, it's range. David Epstein, Right,

1127
01:01:38,240 --> 01:01:41,360
Speaker 2: you need range, but I genuinely mean that I appreciate you.

1128
01:01:42,040 --> 01:01:44,400
Speaker 2: I appreciate what I learn from you and what you

1129
01:01:44,440 --> 01:01:47,160
Speaker 2: give to the world, and I appreciate our friendship and

1130
01:01:47,200 --> 01:01:49,680
Speaker 2: the love that you bring to everything you do. So

1131
01:01:49,720 --> 01:01:53,480
Speaker 2: those those three words, those very simple words, which is

1132
01:01:53,520 --> 01:01:57,520
Speaker 2: really deep and complicated to get so simple. You're on

1133
01:01:57,600 --> 01:01:59,640
Speaker 2: brand mate, Thanks mate, I.

1134
01:01:59,640 --> 01:02:03,040
Speaker 1: Appreciate you, love you, care about you, happy that you're

1135
01:02:03,120 --> 01:02:07,320
Speaker 1: killing it, and that you're doing stuff that's impacting people

1136
01:02:07,360 --> 01:02:10,760
Speaker 1: in a great way. So go you. Hey listeners, you

1137
01:02:10,800 --> 01:02:14,000
Speaker 1: didn't expect this love festige your fucking hell. You probably

1138
01:02:14,040 --> 01:02:15,720
Speaker 1: need to go take a shower after this.

1139
01:02:16,080 --> 01:02:18,760
Speaker 2: If we're in the airport, we'd be hugging and having

1140
01:02:19,040 --> 01:02:20,200
Speaker 2: a bit of a moment.

1141
01:02:20,240 --> 01:02:23,040
Speaker 1: We definitely would know. Mate, you're great, love you, thank

1142
01:02:23,080 --> 01:02:24,160
Speaker 1: you so much for having me.

1143
01:02:24,240 --> 01:02:26,760
Speaker 2: And overnight success doesn't happen, right. You can have a meme,

1144
01:02:26,880 --> 01:02:28,200
Speaker 2: or you can become a meme, you can have a

1145
01:02:28,280 --> 01:02:33,040
Speaker 2: viral hit, But the fundamental message to finishes twofold love

1146
01:02:33,160 --> 01:02:36,080
Speaker 2: and connection. That's a little bonus that's come out of this.

1147
01:02:36,800 --> 01:02:39,360
Speaker 2: But to be successful, you've got to do the hard yards.

1148
01:02:39,400 --> 01:02:41,360
Speaker 2: It doesn't mean it has to be really difficult, but

1149
01:02:41,360 --> 01:02:43,760
Speaker 2: you've just got to be patient, have a long range

1150
01:02:43,840 --> 01:02:45,080
Speaker 2: view and enjoy it along the way.

1151
01:02:46,280 --> 01:02:49,800
Speaker 1: What he said, love your brother so you might