1 00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:03,120 Speaker 1: This is the Fits In with Her with Kate Richie podcast. 2 00:00:03,360 --> 00:00:06,360 Speaker 2: I did a bit of deep thinking yesterday. Now that 3 00:00:06,400 --> 00:00:07,360 Speaker 2: doesn't happen often. 4 00:00:07,360 --> 00:00:08,760 Speaker 1: I was going to say, are you okay? 5 00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:11,879 Speaker 2: Not really, it's exhausted me. I'm a surface level guy. 6 00:00:12,039 --> 00:00:14,560 Speaker 2: I'm like, what do I think about that? Yes? 7 00:00:14,680 --> 00:00:14,880 Speaker 1: Or no? 8 00:00:15,160 --> 00:00:15,720 Speaker 2: I'm sort of. 9 00:00:17,560 --> 00:00:21,200 Speaker 3: I'm a surface level guy, the greatest. 10 00:00:20,920 --> 00:00:24,919 Speaker 1: On the surf I've ever and what wonderful self awareness. 11 00:00:24,960 --> 00:00:27,200 Speaker 2: Well, if I then have to go more than say, 12 00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:31,479 Speaker 2: ninety seconds or possibly two minutes on one topic, that's 13 00:00:31,480 --> 00:00:34,360 Speaker 2: heading into areas that I'm not great at going, ha, 14 00:00:35,240 --> 00:00:38,760 Speaker 2: that's below the surface CHRISTI swamp and that scares me. 15 00:00:39,440 --> 00:00:42,680 Speaker 2: So I bumped into a girl yesterday that I hadn't 16 00:00:42,720 --> 00:00:47,519 Speaker 2: seen for probably fifteen years. And when we clicked and 17 00:00:47,560 --> 00:00:49,839 Speaker 2: I realized who it was, and she realized who it was. 18 00:00:49,920 --> 00:00:52,960 Speaker 2: You know, there's that moment too of will we acknowledge 19 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:55,360 Speaker 2: that we know each other as we walk past, and 20 00:00:55,400 --> 00:00:57,880 Speaker 2: it felt like the eye contact had gone for long enough. 21 00:00:58,240 --> 00:00:58,800 Speaker 2: We had to. 22 00:00:59,520 --> 00:01:02,680 Speaker 1: Okay, can you just tell me where do you know her? From? 23 00:01:04,400 --> 00:01:09,600 Speaker 2: Radio entertainment? And she worked at the same radio station 24 00:01:09,680 --> 00:01:10,119 Speaker 2: that I did. 25 00:01:10,200 --> 00:01:13,120 Speaker 4: Ye, let's just let's just say radio, because you haven't 26 00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:14,720 Speaker 4: entertained anyone for a long time. 27 00:01:14,920 --> 00:01:17,200 Speaker 2: Let's just I could do two and a half minutes 28 00:01:17,200 --> 00:01:19,200 Speaker 2: on that and go deep, but I won't. I'm a 29 00:01:19,240 --> 00:01:23,480 Speaker 2: surface level guy. So then I said, Hi, how are you. 30 00:01:23,520 --> 00:01:26,880 Speaker 2: I didn't even know you lived in Sydney. Her first 31 00:01:26,959 --> 00:01:35,120 Speaker 2: comment was, wow, you've aged well. I thought that's Initially 32 00:01:35,120 --> 00:01:38,520 Speaker 2: I thought, yeah, that's great. But in my deeper thinking, 33 00:01:39,120 --> 00:01:42,080 Speaker 2: I went to imagine if that was the first thing 34 00:01:42,160 --> 00:01:47,080 Speaker 2: I said to you, And then my thinking dropped even 35 00:01:47,200 --> 00:01:50,680 Speaker 2: lower to an area like the what is it the 36 00:01:50,720 --> 00:01:54,080 Speaker 2: Marianne What is it the Marianna Trench? Tom I went 37 00:01:54,120 --> 00:01:57,320 Speaker 2: as deep as you can go, and I thought. 38 00:01:57,560 --> 00:01:59,280 Speaker 1: There is a hole. 39 00:01:59,560 --> 00:02:01,760 Speaker 2: There's a whole language out there that can only be 40 00:02:01,800 --> 00:02:05,240 Speaker 2: spoken on a one way street. It can only go 41 00:02:05,720 --> 00:02:08,960 Speaker 2: from woman to man. It can't go from man to woman, 42 00:02:09,960 --> 00:02:13,400 Speaker 2: or social disaster will strike this planet. 43 00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:16,840 Speaker 3: Like if she'd said, wow, your boobs look great in 44 00:02:16,919 --> 00:02:21,079 Speaker 3: that polo. Yeah, that's that's not something you can say 45 00:02:21,120 --> 00:02:21,640 Speaker 3: to a woman. 46 00:02:22,320 --> 00:02:23,839 Speaker 1: You know, I have said it to you, and I'll 47 00:02:23,880 --> 00:02:24,760 Speaker 1: say it again. 48 00:02:25,080 --> 00:02:28,919 Speaker 2: Especially the left one. But the other day we were 49 00:02:28,919 --> 00:02:30,960 Speaker 2: going to some event and we were there with another 50 00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:34,800 Speaker 2: couple Trent and Lisa. Anyway, Lisa had said to Trent, 51 00:02:34,880 --> 00:02:37,000 Speaker 2: why don't you dress more like this person and look 52 00:02:37,080 --> 00:02:40,240 Speaker 2: more like him? He said, imagine if I turned to 53 00:02:40,280 --> 00:02:42,400 Speaker 2: my wife and said, why don't you dress more like 54 00:02:42,440 --> 00:02:45,880 Speaker 2: Lisa Whipfley and look more like her? That's a one 55 00:02:45,919 --> 00:02:49,320 Speaker 2: way comment that can only go one way. Well, he 56 00:02:49,400 --> 00:02:51,120 Speaker 2: kind of got it, and he moved on from it. 57 00:02:51,240 --> 00:02:53,760 Speaker 1: I mean it's not kind for any gender really. 58 00:02:54,080 --> 00:02:57,120 Speaker 2: I mean, if a woman says to a guy, right, 59 00:02:58,040 --> 00:03:00,080 Speaker 2: you look tired, you kind of cop it. If a 60 00:03:00,120 --> 00:03:03,080 Speaker 2: is the other way World War three. 61 00:03:03,400 --> 00:03:06,079 Speaker 4: I don't. I think you're looking into this too much. 62 00:03:06,360 --> 00:03:09,359 Speaker 2: What about if a girl says to a guy, are 63 00:03:09,360 --> 00:03:11,160 Speaker 2: you seriously going to wear that? The guy goes, yeah, 64 00:03:11,160 --> 00:03:13,160 Speaker 2: I love this stuff. It's my favorite. If a guy 65 00:03:13,200 --> 00:03:15,040 Speaker 2: says to a girl, are you seriously going to wear that? 66 00:03:16,639 --> 00:03:16,880 Speaker 1: Yeah? 67 00:03:16,919 --> 00:03:20,560 Speaker 3: Well it's clothes off, woody on, go on your own 68 00:03:20,639 --> 00:03:21,600 Speaker 3: bombs guy. 69 00:03:21,760 --> 00:03:23,240 Speaker 1: I agree, yes, okay. 70 00:03:23,560 --> 00:03:26,320 Speaker 4: I even struggle now when I see a friend, a 71 00:03:26,360 --> 00:03:29,760 Speaker 4: female friend now, and I say you look great. Even 72 00:03:30,240 --> 00:03:33,520 Speaker 4: I even pause before I even say that, because then 73 00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:36,440 Speaker 4: in my mind I'm saying to myself, so what she 74 00:03:36,680 --> 00:03:39,000 Speaker 4: wasn't looking good before that? 75 00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:41,240 Speaker 2: That happened to me, I do, and that happened to 76 00:03:41,280 --> 00:03:43,760 Speaker 2: me in a group of mums the other day who 77 00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:46,640 Speaker 2: had been talking about how exhausted she was and how 78 00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:49,040 Speaker 2: much she had going on. And then I said, well, considering, 79 00:03:49,080 --> 00:03:52,080 Speaker 2: you look fantastic. And there was this awkward silence as 80 00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:55,080 Speaker 2: I stood there with five other women, and I went, okay, 81 00:03:55,160 --> 00:03:56,840 Speaker 2: so I've made a comment on appearance. 82 00:03:56,960 --> 00:03:59,839 Speaker 4: So you're wearing a leather vest at the time, which 83 00:03:59,880 --> 00:04:00,600 Speaker 4: was a bit weird. 84 00:04:01,600 --> 00:04:04,520 Speaker 2: I was trying to say to her, Hey, given everything, 85 00:04:04,520 --> 00:04:06,640 Speaker 2: we're all in the same battle, you look great. I 86 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:07,920 Speaker 2: was trying to lift her up at the end of 87 00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:10,760 Speaker 2: the conversation, but she would have gone home thinking do 88 00:04:10,840 --> 00:04:11,840 Speaker 2: I always look terrible? 89 00:04:11,840 --> 00:04:16,960 Speaker 3: And on this day, if if we start overthinking everything 90 00:04:17,040 --> 00:04:21,479 Speaker 3: we say, thinking that, just even as you say, you know, 91 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:25,960 Speaker 3: shallow thinking everything we say, we won't say anything at all. 92 00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:26,800 Speaker 2: We won't. 93 00:04:27,080 --> 00:04:29,720 Speaker 3: I think what you need to do is just go 94 00:04:29,800 --> 00:04:33,000 Speaker 3: with the saying. One of my favorites. It is better 95 00:04:33,320 --> 00:04:36,200 Speaker 3: to beg forgiveness than ask permission, isn't it. 96 00:04:36,480 --> 00:04:38,719 Speaker 1: So just say whatever's on your mind. 97 00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:41,000 Speaker 3: Say whatever's on your mind, and then if it's the 98 00:04:41,000 --> 00:04:43,680 Speaker 3: wrong thing, apologize profusely. 99 00:04:43,760 --> 00:04:47,800 Speaker 2: Later Tommy, you look like a grandma. I'm sorry if 100 00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:51,840 Speaker 2: that offended. I just want to thanks, begging for forgiveness. 101 00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:55,719 Speaker 2: It's Whip with Kate Ritchie is a Nova podcast great 102 00:04:55,760 --> 00:04:59,320 Speaker 2: shows like this. Download the Nova player, find the app store. 103 00:05:00,440 --> 00:05:01,360 Speaker 1: An overplayer 104 00:05:02,920 --> 00:05:02,960 Speaker 3: H