1 00:00:00,760 --> 00:00:03,560 Speaker 1: Get ATIV. Welcome Mar to the You Project, Tiffany and 2 00:00:03,600 --> 00:00:08,080 Speaker 1: Cook and everyone else. Before you say anything, why I'm 3 00:00:08,160 --> 00:00:12,000 Speaker 1: in a different virtual room because I'm out of fancy. 4 00:00:12,080 --> 00:00:15,079 Speaker 2: We've leveled up with fancy. We're on riverside. Look at this. 5 00:00:15,240 --> 00:00:17,200 Speaker 2: Look how fancy he is? Even get a countdown when 6 00:00:17,200 --> 00:00:18,840 Speaker 2: I press record. Isn't it fancy? 7 00:00:19,239 --> 00:00:21,360 Speaker 1: It's too fancy for me. I don't you know. I 8 00:00:21,360 --> 00:00:24,280 Speaker 1: don't like change. I don't play well with others, and 9 00:00:24,320 --> 00:00:25,639 Speaker 1: I don't like change. 10 00:00:25,760 --> 00:00:28,440 Speaker 2: That's what That's why I thought I'd throw this one 11 00:00:28,480 --> 00:00:30,159 Speaker 2: to you, just to keep you on your toes, just 12 00:00:30,200 --> 00:00:32,680 Speaker 2: to keep you growing and evolving and learning and doing 13 00:00:32,720 --> 00:00:35,839 Speaker 2: all the Craig harperisms that you teach all of us to. 14 00:00:37,440 --> 00:00:39,639 Speaker 1: I don't know how to deal. So everyone, what I'm 15 00:00:39,680 --> 00:00:43,120 Speaker 1: normally looking at is I'm normally looking at a virtual 16 00:00:43,159 --> 00:00:45,760 Speaker 1: studio that I'm in and it's all razzle dazzle, and 17 00:00:45,800 --> 00:00:48,120 Speaker 1: it's on zoom and it's beautiful. I know exactly what's 18 00:00:48,159 --> 00:00:50,960 Speaker 1: going on. And TIF and I are recording, and she 19 00:00:51,120 --> 00:00:54,640 Speaker 1: sent me a link to something different, and I'm looking 20 00:00:54,680 --> 00:00:57,320 Speaker 1: at I'm just looking at me, sitting in my messy 21 00:00:57,320 --> 00:01:00,840 Speaker 1: office with shit written on the whiteboard behind me. I 22 00:01:00,840 --> 00:01:02,760 Speaker 1: don't have a filter on my face, so I look 23 00:01:02,840 --> 00:01:05,280 Speaker 1: every one of my fucking sixty two years. I look 24 00:01:05,360 --> 00:01:09,760 Speaker 1: like someone's granddad lost in a fucking podcast studio. I 25 00:01:09,959 --> 00:01:12,039 Speaker 1: like the one where I look prettier and younger. Can 26 00:01:12,080 --> 00:01:12,959 Speaker 1: we make that happen? 27 00:01:13,360 --> 00:01:16,000 Speaker 2: I think you look fabulous. Are you a bit thrown 28 00:01:16,080 --> 00:01:19,640 Speaker 2: by my long acrylic nails as well? That's thrown me 29 00:01:19,880 --> 00:01:20,959 Speaker 2: for what is to. 30 00:01:20,880 --> 00:01:23,199 Speaker 1: Go with that? Can you post a photo of those? 31 00:01:23,280 --> 00:01:28,000 Speaker 1: Because I mean, I'm not being offensive or inappropriate when 32 00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:30,280 Speaker 1: I say you are thirty percent male, I think it's 33 00:01:30,319 --> 00:01:37,160 Speaker 1: probably more you claim a mere thirty percent. I'm I 34 00:01:37,160 --> 00:01:39,399 Speaker 1: think you're a hybrid man woman, and I mean that 35 00:01:39,480 --> 00:01:45,880 Speaker 1: in the nicest way, because you've got traps coming out 36 00:01:45,959 --> 00:01:51,880 Speaker 1: of your ears and it dealt for fucking days. Am 37 00:01:51,920 --> 00:01:53,640 Speaker 1: I allowed to keep going because there's. 38 00:01:53,560 --> 00:01:57,200 Speaker 2: More hilarious fabulous? It makes me happy? No? 39 00:01:57,440 --> 00:02:00,240 Speaker 1: I think I know you would laugh, but I know 40 00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:02,960 Speaker 1: there won't be people that will laugh. But I'll tell 41 00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:04,840 Speaker 1: you off air because the next one was going to 42 00:02:04,880 --> 00:02:09,400 Speaker 1: be a fucking zinger, a complete fucking zinger. You would 43 00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:11,520 Speaker 1: have loved it. But three people write and tell me 44 00:02:11,560 --> 00:02:15,600 Speaker 1: how offensive and inappropriate and politically and correct, I am, 45 00:02:15,760 --> 00:02:20,320 Speaker 1: and to those three people, fuck you so no I 46 00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:25,680 Speaker 1: mean that. No, I'm only kidding, but it is, it is. 47 00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:27,800 Speaker 1: It has thrown me a little bit because I'm not 48 00:02:27,919 --> 00:02:31,799 Speaker 1: used to looking at this. But anyway, Ah, tell everyone, 49 00:02:32,200 --> 00:02:35,520 Speaker 1: So you've been in Queensland, you had this thing. I 50 00:02:35,560 --> 00:02:37,840 Speaker 1: know all your people know, but my people don't know. 51 00:02:37,919 --> 00:02:40,200 Speaker 1: So you've got this opportunity to speak at this event, 52 00:02:40,280 --> 00:02:42,680 Speaker 1: which did a good give us the snapshot before we 53 00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:45,160 Speaker 1: dive into our which we may not even get to 54 00:02:45,240 --> 00:02:50,840 Speaker 1: our fucking topic, because that is generally the way. I guess. 55 00:02:50,880 --> 00:02:54,720 Speaker 1: My long winded point is you and long girly nails, 56 00:02:54,919 --> 00:02:58,800 Speaker 1: and God bless her, it's kind of like me in 57 00:02:58,840 --> 00:03:01,760 Speaker 1: a fucking tutu. It just messes with my head. 58 00:03:02,560 --> 00:03:05,919 Speaker 2: Me too. And I asked three times for short, straight nails, 59 00:03:05,960 --> 00:03:09,160 Speaker 2: and she just looked at me and went, they're feminine. 60 00:03:09,919 --> 00:03:13,720 Speaker 2: Your deal, your deal. She would not listen and she 61 00:03:13,880 --> 00:03:16,359 Speaker 2: laughed at me. I was like, bro, I can't ride 62 00:03:16,440 --> 00:03:19,840 Speaker 2: my motorcycle with nails like this. She said, you deal. 63 00:03:20,919 --> 00:03:23,720 Speaker 1: Are you inferring that the lady who did your nails? 64 00:03:24,320 --> 00:03:25,880 Speaker 1: Was it a lady or a man or? It was 65 00:03:25,919 --> 00:03:29,560 Speaker 1: a lady right, just checking? Are you inferring one that 66 00:03:29,639 --> 00:03:30,360 Speaker 1: she was Asian? 67 00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:36,360 Speaker 2: Because if anyone, if anyone has seen the real most 68 00:03:36,360 --> 00:03:38,040 Speaker 2: people will know this when I say it, and someone 69 00:03:38,040 --> 00:03:40,320 Speaker 2: will be like, what are you talking about? If everyone 70 00:03:40,400 --> 00:03:42,880 Speaker 2: knows the real the comedy reel, I can't remember the 71 00:03:42,920 --> 00:03:45,040 Speaker 2: chick's name, but she does a thing about the nail 72 00:03:45,120 --> 00:03:47,520 Speaker 2: so on and she's like, do you like grittel joll? 73 00:03:48,040 --> 00:03:51,680 Speaker 2: Everyone knows that this was a version of that cheek. 74 00:03:51,760 --> 00:03:54,160 Speaker 2: She was so funny, but she would not give me 75 00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:56,640 Speaker 2: what I wanted, and she upsold me and she did 76 00:03:56,640 --> 00:03:58,680 Speaker 2: the opposite of what I asked for. And now I'm 77 00:03:58,680 --> 00:04:02,560 Speaker 2: stuck with these long roll with the punched colors. Roll 78 00:04:02,560 --> 00:04:04,839 Speaker 2: with the punch is colored? Get your words right. 79 00:04:05,240 --> 00:04:08,760 Speaker 1: Fingernails, well, they are very glamorous. But when I think 80 00:04:08,760 --> 00:04:12,520 Speaker 1: of glamorous, with all due respect, you don't fucking spring 81 00:04:12,600 --> 00:04:19,159 Speaker 1: to mind. When I think of you, I think more like, 82 00:04:19,160 --> 00:04:23,520 Speaker 1: like those nails are like, uh, you know, Porsche nine 83 00:04:23,520 --> 00:04:27,960 Speaker 1: to eleven. You're more like Ford F one fifty pickup 84 00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:35,520 Speaker 1: truck like that. You know that. 85 00:04:37,120 --> 00:04:39,240 Speaker 2: I don't mind that. I don't mind that. That help 86 00:04:39,440 --> 00:04:40,600 Speaker 2: me stand out on the week. 87 00:04:40,880 --> 00:04:43,599 Speaker 1: On the week to me, what's tiff Like I say, 88 00:04:43,839 --> 00:04:52,839 Speaker 1: robust robust? Yeah, so if glamorous is one end of 89 00:04:52,880 --> 00:04:56,440 Speaker 1: the scale and robust is the other, you're up that end. 90 00:04:56,720 --> 00:04:59,680 Speaker 2: I'm exactly where I want to be. Then thank you. 91 00:04:59,680 --> 00:05:02,760 Speaker 1: No, you're welcome, You're welcome. I reckon, I'm closer to 92 00:05:02,800 --> 00:05:03,839 Speaker 1: the glamor and than you. 93 00:05:07,320 --> 00:05:09,400 Speaker 2: Some of these nails on and you're going to own it. 94 00:05:09,960 --> 00:05:12,560 Speaker 1: Now. That lady that you were talking about, the Asian 95 00:05:12,680 --> 00:05:16,720 Speaker 1: lady who was impersonating, and so she's an Asian comedian 96 00:05:17,200 --> 00:05:19,200 Speaker 1: who was impersonating. 97 00:05:18,480 --> 00:05:21,839 Speaker 2: And she's not Asian. I think she might be. 98 00:05:21,640 --> 00:05:25,080 Speaker 1: No, I think she is. Is she the one that 99 00:05:25,160 --> 00:05:30,440 Speaker 1: said you so pretty? Why you not have boyfriend? Yeah? Yeah, 100 00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:33,640 Speaker 1: now I'm going to get in. I'm just saying what 101 00:05:33,720 --> 00:05:38,200 Speaker 1: she said, so don't yell at me. Yeah, it's yeah, funny, 102 00:05:38,400 --> 00:05:40,680 Speaker 1: very funny. How do people find that? If they want 103 00:05:40,720 --> 00:05:43,000 Speaker 1: to find that, could they They could go to YouTube 104 00:05:43,120 --> 00:05:46,799 Speaker 1: like Lady Nail Lady comedian. 105 00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:50,520 Speaker 2: Jail Crystal Jel Nail comedy. All right, that'll bring it 106 00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:52,360 Speaker 2: up and I will find it and put it in 107 00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:54,279 Speaker 2: the typ Facebook group. 108 00:05:55,000 --> 00:05:58,120 Speaker 1: So how did you go? So you were because you 109 00:05:58,240 --> 00:06:04,000 Speaker 1: were having at various stages, a little fucking tanty and 110 00:06:04,080 --> 00:06:10,559 Speaker 1: emotional kind of periodic meltdown because you, well, you who 111 00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:13,960 Speaker 1: is like a dog with a metaphoric dog with three dicks, 112 00:06:13,960 --> 00:06:17,080 Speaker 1: and you just like to wander and go wherever you 113 00:06:17,120 --> 00:06:21,400 Speaker 1: want to go. But you you have been working in 114 00:06:21,560 --> 00:06:25,320 Speaker 1: part of this program to be trained in a certain 115 00:06:26,480 --> 00:06:29,559 Speaker 1: particular way of presenting in a certain model. And let's 116 00:06:29,600 --> 00:06:32,000 Speaker 1: just say that initially you and it weren't a great fit, 117 00:06:32,120 --> 00:06:35,800 Speaker 1: or you didn't think you were, because you're like, fuck rules, 118 00:06:35,800 --> 00:06:38,000 Speaker 1: I don't like rule, stick your rules up your ass, 119 00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:42,080 Speaker 1: and they're like, well, you actually enrolled in this program. 120 00:06:43,120 --> 00:06:46,120 Speaker 1: That's like me going to do a PhD gume. By 121 00:06:46,160 --> 00:06:49,200 Speaker 1: the way, I'll do it however I want fuck your system. 122 00:06:49,839 --> 00:06:53,160 Speaker 1: I don't care about I don't care about the PhD rules. 123 00:06:53,440 --> 00:06:57,159 Speaker 1: Fuck it. Yeah, So how did you go with that? 124 00:06:57,279 --> 00:07:00,600 Speaker 1: Because I when you started that and I figured out 125 00:07:00,680 --> 00:07:04,000 Speaker 1: that it was so Tiff was doing correct me if 126 00:07:04,040 --> 00:07:06,440 Speaker 1: I get anything wrong. So you're doing a like a 127 00:07:06,520 --> 00:07:11,960 Speaker 1: speaking speaker's development kind of process program with other people. 128 00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:14,320 Speaker 1: What's the lady's name who led it? We may as 129 00:07:14,360 --> 00:07:16,000 Speaker 1: well give her a fucking shout at what's. 130 00:07:15,840 --> 00:07:20,240 Speaker 2: Her name Jacqueline Jacqueline Brooker, she deserves it. She's She's 131 00:07:20,240 --> 00:07:22,280 Speaker 2: put up with me for a long time now, so 132 00:07:22,440 --> 00:07:23,640 Speaker 2: she deserves a shout out. 133 00:07:24,040 --> 00:07:26,160 Speaker 1: Is it fair that to say that you crack the 134 00:07:26,160 --> 00:07:27,400 Speaker 1: shits at her a little bit? 135 00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:30,280 Speaker 2: I look yet, internally, yeah, I was. 136 00:07:30,520 --> 00:07:30,920 Speaker 1: I was. 137 00:07:32,320 --> 00:07:34,440 Speaker 2: I think I used the word petulant with you the 138 00:07:34,480 --> 00:07:36,920 Speaker 2: other day. I was. I tried to keep it all internal, 139 00:07:36,960 --> 00:07:38,880 Speaker 2: but you know, I'm not good at that. So when 140 00:07:38,920 --> 00:07:42,600 Speaker 2: there's internal angst, everybody involved feels it. 141 00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:47,480 Speaker 1: What did you so, what did you learn about stepping 142 00:07:47,520 --> 00:07:50,920 Speaker 1: out of the tiff model, which is like essentially no model, 143 00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:55,360 Speaker 1: It's just like free range chicken, and being kind of 144 00:07:55,480 --> 00:07:59,360 Speaker 1: channeled into a particular way of doing something, not forever 145 00:07:59,400 --> 00:08:02,400 Speaker 1: but for a peweriod of time. What did you What 146 00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:05,239 Speaker 1: were the what were the positives? What were the lessons 147 00:08:05,240 --> 00:08:05,640 Speaker 1: out of it? 148 00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:12,400 Speaker 2: Well, what was interesting, ironic and beneficial and valuable was 149 00:08:12,440 --> 00:08:17,480 Speaker 2: that almost every component of the keynote I put together 150 00:08:17,560 --> 00:08:22,120 Speaker 2: that I was teaching about lessons that I have learned 151 00:08:22,200 --> 00:08:27,240 Speaker 2: or value had to be applied. I had to apply. 152 00:08:27,400 --> 00:08:31,800 Speaker 2: I was applying them, managing my emotions, dealing within a critic, 153 00:08:35,080 --> 00:08:41,000 Speaker 2: looking at my programming, and my ability to control what 154 00:08:41,160 --> 00:08:46,680 Speaker 2: was what I could control and get uncomfortable and be 155 00:08:46,800 --> 00:08:50,760 Speaker 2: honest about what challenges me, and be honest about my 156 00:08:50,880 --> 00:08:53,960 Speaker 2: perception versus reality. Like all of this stuff is are 157 00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:57,560 Speaker 2: things that I talk about inside the keynote, and in 158 00:08:57,600 --> 00:09:01,840 Speaker 2: the middle of it, I'm challenged by them because that's 159 00:09:01,880 --> 00:09:04,240 Speaker 2: the nature of the work we do, right, and we 160 00:09:04,360 --> 00:09:07,840 Speaker 2: do the work that we need to do, like we 161 00:09:07,960 --> 00:09:09,800 Speaker 2: end up I think we end up teaching what we 162 00:09:09,920 --> 00:09:11,920 Speaker 2: need to learn or what we've needed to learn. 163 00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:15,400 Speaker 1: And I think, like I've said to you a few times, 164 00:09:15,440 --> 00:09:18,360 Speaker 1: when a few things in your life are going not great, 165 00:09:18,559 --> 00:09:20,360 Speaker 1: I'm like, this is when all of the stuff that 166 00:09:20,400 --> 00:09:23,080 Speaker 1: we talk about actually matters right now, when things are shit, 167 00:09:23,960 --> 00:09:29,080 Speaker 1: when things are uncomfortable and unfamiliar and uncertain and unpleasant, 168 00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:32,840 Speaker 1: and it's like, now is when you need to be 169 00:09:32,960 --> 00:09:37,199 Speaker 1: able to walk the talk that you've been talking. Otherwise 170 00:09:37,240 --> 00:09:41,120 Speaker 1: it's just fucking window dressing for a life that's really 171 00:09:41,679 --> 00:09:45,079 Speaker 1: kind of not representative of the person that we are publicly. 172 00:09:45,120 --> 00:09:48,200 Speaker 1: And that is that is, you know, for me, that 173 00:09:48,320 --> 00:09:51,200 Speaker 1: is why it's personal development. It's not a product or 174 00:09:51,200 --> 00:09:54,080 Speaker 1: a brand or a book or a podcast or a 175 00:09:54,120 --> 00:09:59,079 Speaker 1: presentation like personal development is literally a messy, uncomfortable motherfucker 176 00:09:59,120 --> 00:10:03,360 Speaker 1: of a process that we go through, or don't you know? 177 00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:08,360 Speaker 1: Self help is literally for me helping yourself, you know. 178 00:10:08,440 --> 00:10:10,800 Speaker 1: And yes there are going to be kind of resources 179 00:10:10,840 --> 00:10:13,679 Speaker 1: and videos and books and all of those things in 180 00:10:13,720 --> 00:10:18,400 Speaker 1: your proximity perhaps, but that kind of when you turn 181 00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:22,760 Speaker 1: it from a noun into a verb, like a doing word, 182 00:10:23,280 --> 00:10:27,079 Speaker 1: She's like, oh, this is what personal growth, personal developments, 183 00:10:27,200 --> 00:10:31,840 Speaker 1: self help, human behavior, this is what it is about. 184 00:10:33,559 --> 00:10:37,840 Speaker 1: And it was like what I liked was I thought, 185 00:10:37,960 --> 00:10:40,959 Speaker 1: for a minute there you weren't going to because you 186 00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:42,800 Speaker 1: went to Queensland to do this and it was a 187 00:10:42,800 --> 00:10:45,000 Speaker 1: big event and there were lots of people, big crowd, 188 00:10:45,080 --> 00:10:47,720 Speaker 1: lots of other speakers. But there was a moment there 189 00:10:47,760 --> 00:10:49,720 Speaker 1: where I thought, Ah, she's not going to go. She's 190 00:10:49,760 --> 00:10:52,040 Speaker 1: going to fucking throw the dummy out of the cot. 191 00:10:52,160 --> 00:10:55,319 Speaker 1: She's not going. But what, Shane, what's got you back 192 00:10:55,360 --> 00:10:55,800 Speaker 1: on track? 193 00:10:56,559 --> 00:10:59,760 Speaker 2: I was closer than you would probably realize to that. 194 00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:04,760 Speaker 2: The only I'd say, the main reason I didn't is 195 00:11:04,800 --> 00:11:08,680 Speaker 2: that I had three people that had bought tickets to 196 00:11:08,720 --> 00:11:11,280 Speaker 2: be there too, from Queensland, one from Melbourne, and I 197 00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:17,480 Speaker 2: was like, you kind of can't your mate's are doing anything. Yeah. 198 00:11:17,920 --> 00:11:20,720 Speaker 2: One of the big reasons I was justifying to myself 199 00:11:20,760 --> 00:11:22,560 Speaker 2: that it's better off for me to pull out was 200 00:11:22,760 --> 00:11:25,440 Speaker 2: the quality of the people in the room. I was like, well, 201 00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:28,240 Speaker 2: if I'm going to go and deliver this keynote and 202 00:11:28,320 --> 00:11:32,840 Speaker 2: I feel that it's going to be suboptimal compared to 203 00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:35,440 Speaker 2: what I feel like I would be able to bring 204 00:11:35,480 --> 00:11:38,040 Speaker 2: if I could just do my own thing, then do 205 00:11:38,120 --> 00:11:40,280 Speaker 2: I want to be doing that in front of the 206 00:11:40,320 --> 00:11:43,880 Speaker 2: potential contacts that I'll be speaking in front of, because 207 00:11:45,240 --> 00:11:49,920 Speaker 2: that is that a good opportunity or a bad opportunity. 208 00:11:50,120 --> 00:11:53,080 Speaker 2: So and then I got about maybe three or four 209 00:11:53,080 --> 00:11:56,720 Speaker 2: weeks out and I went, Okay, well, you've got a 210 00:11:56,840 --> 00:11:59,760 Speaker 2: choice here. You can either keep complaining or you can 211 00:12:00,080 --> 00:12:02,840 Speaker 2: choose to do this and just put every bit of 212 00:12:02,880 --> 00:12:09,360 Speaker 2: your attention and energy into trying to nail it as 213 00:12:09,440 --> 00:12:12,200 Speaker 2: very best you can inside the process, whether you like 214 00:12:12,320 --> 00:12:14,000 Speaker 2: think you like it or not. That's what you said 215 00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:16,840 Speaker 2: when you started this course, that maybe it'll be the 216 00:12:16,840 --> 00:12:19,440 Speaker 2: shittest one you've ever done, and that you'll learn something. 217 00:12:19,480 --> 00:12:22,840 Speaker 2: But then when it came to facing that, it's still 218 00:12:22,960 --> 00:12:25,560 Speaker 2: very hard, right, because you go, I'm going to be shit. 219 00:12:25,600 --> 00:12:27,760 Speaker 2: Everyone's going to think I'm shit. I'm going to be embarrassed, 220 00:12:27,920 --> 00:12:30,640 Speaker 2: it's going to be awkward. Important people are going to 221 00:12:30,640 --> 00:12:34,439 Speaker 2: see me fail, and I don't want to feel like that. 222 00:12:35,960 --> 00:12:39,319 Speaker 1: What was the I mean, you just managed a couple 223 00:12:39,320 --> 00:12:41,520 Speaker 1: of things, But what were the things that for you 224 00:12:41,600 --> 00:12:47,240 Speaker 1: were the hardest to overcome or deal with or navigate 225 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:50,079 Speaker 1: in terms of getting there and doing it? 226 00:12:51,640 --> 00:12:55,680 Speaker 2: It was the things that I value in speaking, that 227 00:12:55,800 --> 00:13:01,640 Speaker 2: I think that I bring are me just being very 228 00:13:01,720 --> 00:13:05,840 Speaker 2: grounded and relatable and real and in the moment and 229 00:13:05,960 --> 00:13:10,240 Speaker 2: present and connected to my audience, like we are having 230 00:13:10,280 --> 00:13:13,520 Speaker 2: a one on one conversation at a coffee shop. That's 231 00:13:13,520 --> 00:13:18,160 Speaker 2: what I think. I really love that style of a speaker, 232 00:13:18,240 --> 00:13:21,360 Speaker 2: someone that just isn't putting on a performance. Especially A 233 00:13:21,360 --> 00:13:24,720 Speaker 2: big part of my keynote is talking about the masks 234 00:13:24,760 --> 00:13:27,400 Speaker 2: we wear and to drop the mask because you know, 235 00:13:27,440 --> 00:13:30,200 Speaker 2: we don't get real results, we don't know ourselves, we 236 00:13:30,240 --> 00:13:33,000 Speaker 2: don't overcome our bullshit when we're wearing a mask. So 237 00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:37,120 Speaker 2: it's a value of mine. And so then I'm creating 238 00:13:37,160 --> 00:13:42,240 Speaker 2: this keynote that is quite tightly Like initially we script 239 00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:44,400 Speaker 2: every we script the entire thing, which I found a 240 00:13:44,480 --> 00:13:46,600 Speaker 2: challenge because how I write and how I talk a different. 241 00:13:46,720 --> 00:13:49,760 Speaker 2: So how do you get your thoughts down into written 242 00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:52,160 Speaker 2: words that are the words that you would say when 243 00:13:52,160 --> 00:13:56,439 Speaker 2: you're speaking. So that process was tricky, and I just thought, 244 00:13:56,480 --> 00:13:59,360 Speaker 2: my head's going to be so full of this new 245 00:13:59,400 --> 00:14:03,280 Speaker 2: information and that the things I value the most can't 246 00:14:03,320 --> 00:14:07,280 Speaker 2: possibly happen, and I will forget because of my brain 247 00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:10,040 Speaker 2: isn't always my best mate when it comes to details. 248 00:14:10,520 --> 00:14:13,560 Speaker 2: I'll get up there, I'll make eye contact and crack 249 00:14:13,559 --> 00:14:17,080 Speaker 2: a joke with someone, and then I'll think, I've no 250 00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:19,960 Speaker 2: idea where I'm at or where I'm what I'm supposed to, 251 00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:21,800 Speaker 2: you know, I just I will blame. I thought, that's 252 00:14:21,800 --> 00:14:24,000 Speaker 2: what's going to happen, and that's going to be really embarrassing. 253 00:14:24,800 --> 00:14:26,080 Speaker 2: So that was my challenge. 254 00:14:27,040 --> 00:14:32,440 Speaker 1: So for you also because you are probably a bit 255 00:14:32,560 --> 00:14:36,280 Speaker 1: like me in that like I've never which is not 256 00:14:36,360 --> 00:14:37,880 Speaker 1: say this is a good thing or a bad thing, 257 00:14:38,680 --> 00:14:43,560 Speaker 1: but I've never in my life rehearsed or practiced or 258 00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:48,080 Speaker 1: anything ever. Like I've never had a script. I've always had, 259 00:14:48,440 --> 00:14:50,360 Speaker 1: you know, dot point notes, and you were a little 260 00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:54,040 Speaker 1: bit like that. But this this was very much where 261 00:14:54,040 --> 00:14:57,680 Speaker 1: they wanted it to be, at least initially somewhat scripted, 262 00:14:58,640 --> 00:15:02,120 Speaker 1: so that you could kind of have pretty much a 263 00:15:02,280 --> 00:15:08,080 Speaker 1: set presentation, which is really not your natural habitat or 264 00:15:08,120 --> 00:15:11,920 Speaker 1: your normal operating system. Right, sure not, So were you 265 00:15:12,080 --> 00:15:17,560 Speaker 1: able to, within the confines of that process still be. 266 00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:25,120 Speaker 2: You, interestingly more than I ever believed I could have. 267 00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:29,960 Speaker 2: So when it came to the day, I felt completely 268 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:33,840 Speaker 2: like I almost felt like I wasn't scripted at all. 269 00:15:34,320 --> 00:15:35,760 Speaker 2: I just knew it. I knew what I was going 270 00:15:35,840 --> 00:15:37,600 Speaker 2: to say, and obviously there were things I was saying. 271 00:15:38,120 --> 00:15:41,600 Speaker 2: I mean, within that process itself, it is not to 272 00:15:41,680 --> 00:15:44,920 Speaker 2: be word perfect scripted. It's just to tightly know your content. 273 00:15:44,920 --> 00:15:46,920 Speaker 2: It's pretty much how it rolled out, which I was 274 00:15:46,960 --> 00:15:50,240 Speaker 2: saying the whole time, old kid, it's just memorizing words. 275 00:15:51,160 --> 00:15:56,760 Speaker 2: But it actually did unfold that way, and it gave 276 00:15:56,840 --> 00:15:59,680 Speaker 2: me a lead up of the weeks. In leading up, 277 00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:02,080 Speaker 2: you know what, I'm normally like, I can't do anything 278 00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:03,960 Speaker 2: because I'm like, oh, oh, I got to do this thing, 279 00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:07,000 Speaker 2: and I'm all anxious. I've never been so relaxed, and 280 00:16:07,040 --> 00:16:09,200 Speaker 2: I've never been so relaxed as I was on the day, 281 00:16:09,800 --> 00:16:15,120 Speaker 2: and I had the best fun because I just trusted 282 00:16:15,120 --> 00:16:17,640 Speaker 2: that I was going to say what I needed to say, 283 00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:20,680 Speaker 2: and then I just got to improvise and crack jokes 284 00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:25,520 Speaker 2: and know that you know, I guess the most pressure 285 00:16:25,560 --> 00:16:27,920 Speaker 2: that was there was that I had it really tight 286 00:16:28,800 --> 00:16:31,280 Speaker 2: forty minutes with two minutes leeway, and I knew because 287 00:16:31,280 --> 00:16:33,360 Speaker 2: I'd practiced it over and over, I knew that I 288 00:16:33,400 --> 00:16:36,560 Speaker 2: was hitting forty two minutes every time. So I didn't 289 00:16:36,600 --> 00:16:40,680 Speaker 2: have time to dilly dally or get or go on 290 00:16:40,720 --> 00:16:46,080 Speaker 2: a tangent or muck around. So yeah, it gave me 291 00:16:46,080 --> 00:16:48,320 Speaker 2: mental space to think about those little things that I 292 00:16:48,360 --> 00:16:50,520 Speaker 2: don't normally get to think about because I'm thinking about 293 00:16:50,600 --> 00:16:51,920 Speaker 2: the content that's coming out. 294 00:16:53,240 --> 00:16:56,280 Speaker 1: It's interesting sometimes, I think when we go through a 295 00:16:56,320 --> 00:16:59,600 Speaker 1: process or we commit to do something that might not 296 00:16:59,680 --> 00:17:02,280 Speaker 1: be fun or easy, but we want to at the 297 00:17:02,400 --> 00:17:04,440 Speaker 1: end of the thing that we commit to, whether or 298 00:17:04,480 --> 00:17:06,720 Speaker 1: not it's a new way of eating, or whether or 299 00:17:06,760 --> 00:17:09,160 Speaker 1: not it's a speaking program, or whether or not it's 300 00:17:10,160 --> 00:17:12,399 Speaker 1: you know, doing an undergrad degree, or whether or not 301 00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:15,480 Speaker 1: it's like anything where it's a process and you've got 302 00:17:15,520 --> 00:17:16,919 Speaker 1: to go and work at it and you've got to 303 00:17:16,960 --> 00:17:22,640 Speaker 1: keep showing up. I think quite often it's actually ironically 304 00:17:22,800 --> 00:17:25,480 Speaker 1: in the middle of the thing that you're doing, like 305 00:17:25,560 --> 00:17:27,720 Speaker 1: you're creating the outcome, and the outcome for you was 306 00:17:27,720 --> 00:17:29,720 Speaker 1: you rocked up. You did it, you did a good job, 307 00:17:30,040 --> 00:17:32,879 Speaker 1: people liked it, you did a good presentation, tickety boot, 308 00:17:33,680 --> 00:17:36,119 Speaker 1: as Paul Taylor says. But in the middle of that 309 00:17:36,560 --> 00:17:40,480 Speaker 1: you kind of you really develop and you really learn, 310 00:17:40,520 --> 00:17:46,320 Speaker 1: and you're actually, as you said, you're dealing with all 311 00:17:46,359 --> 00:17:49,680 Speaker 1: of the shit it's personally that you're then going to 312 00:17:49,760 --> 00:17:53,480 Speaker 1: talk to people about. And so you're still a fucking 313 00:17:54,440 --> 00:18:00,359 Speaker 1: dysfunctional work in progress, you know, just like me. The 314 00:18:00,440 --> 00:18:03,520 Speaker 1: amount of times in my in the last six years, 315 00:18:03,560 --> 00:18:06,040 Speaker 1: by the way, three days ago it was six years 316 00:18:06,080 --> 00:18:09,840 Speaker 1: my PhD and you know it's about two months away maybe, 317 00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:14,199 Speaker 1: but the amount of times where I've I've thought, not 318 00:18:14,440 --> 00:18:16,639 Speaker 1: how could I give up? Right, because it's not really, 319 00:18:17,119 --> 00:18:19,919 Speaker 1: but like, how do I get out of this? How 320 00:18:19,920 --> 00:18:23,080 Speaker 1: do I get out of it? Because this is like 321 00:18:23,600 --> 00:18:24,879 Speaker 1: is it worth it? 322 00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:25,159 Speaker 2: Is it? 323 00:18:25,240 --> 00:18:27,920 Speaker 1: Why am I doing it? Do I need to do it? 324 00:18:28,320 --> 00:18:31,320 Speaker 1: I already have a decent following. A few people think 325 00:18:31,359 --> 00:18:33,840 Speaker 1: I know what I'm talking about. I've written a few books, 326 00:18:33,840 --> 00:18:37,040 Speaker 1: I've done a few things. I've got a profile. It's 327 00:18:37,080 --> 00:18:40,240 Speaker 1: not shit like there's a bit of respect for me. 328 00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:42,440 Speaker 1: I don't know, you know, a few people think I'm a. 329 00:18:42,440 --> 00:18:45,879 Speaker 3: Fuck with That's all right, but it's gonna make a 330 00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:50,679 Speaker 3: difference and that, and it's it's just because it's fucking hard, 331 00:18:51,359 --> 00:18:55,000 Speaker 3: and I'm like, oh god, and it takes so long. 332 00:18:54,920 --> 00:18:59,520 Speaker 1: And and you're you're, you know, like you were in 333 00:18:59,560 --> 00:19:05,359 Speaker 1: this kind of this paradigm, this model, this program that 334 00:19:05,960 --> 00:19:09,879 Speaker 1: wasn't your natural habitat. And I've been in a version 335 00:19:09,920 --> 00:19:12,959 Speaker 1: of that for six years where I'm not a natural academic, 336 00:19:13,040 --> 00:19:16,520 Speaker 1: but I'm in that world and you learn how to 337 00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:18,760 Speaker 1: do it right. And even when I'm finished, I'm not 338 00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:21,280 Speaker 1: going to come out and go, yeah, I'm an academic, 339 00:19:21,320 --> 00:19:24,320 Speaker 1: because I'm I've done an academic process. But I don't 340 00:19:24,359 --> 00:19:28,439 Speaker 1: see myself as an academic. But somebody who's you know, 341 00:19:28,560 --> 00:19:30,719 Speaker 1: can do certain things, just like I can play guitar, 342 00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:34,320 Speaker 1: but I don't call myself a musician, right. It's you know, 343 00:19:34,680 --> 00:19:37,280 Speaker 1: I can run, but I don't call myself a runner. 344 00:19:37,359 --> 00:19:37,520 Speaker 2: Right. 345 00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:39,560 Speaker 1: It's so, yeah, well you did this thing, Craigan, you 346 00:19:39,600 --> 00:19:41,720 Speaker 1: created this result, and Tip you did the same and 347 00:19:42,040 --> 00:19:46,200 Speaker 1: well done. But the interesting thing for me is it's 348 00:19:46,640 --> 00:19:48,919 Speaker 1: maybe one of the hardest things I've done in my 349 00:19:49,040 --> 00:19:53,960 Speaker 1: life because it isn't where I excel. It isn't the 350 00:19:54,000 --> 00:19:57,960 Speaker 1: thing that I'm great at. It's like people go, oh, 351 00:19:58,160 --> 00:20:00,639 Speaker 1: you know, like, oh, you like when I built my 352 00:20:00,720 --> 00:20:03,399 Speaker 1: businesses and stuff, like I built gyms, Well, that's my 353 00:20:03,560 --> 00:20:07,240 Speaker 1: fucking natural habitat. And yeah there was business stuff and 354 00:20:07,280 --> 00:20:09,639 Speaker 1: commercial stuff that I needed to learn and adapt to. 355 00:20:09,720 --> 00:20:13,160 Speaker 1: But like for me, doing a PhD is twenty six 356 00:20:13,240 --> 00:20:17,480 Speaker 1: times harder than building a business, you know, and being 357 00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:20,199 Speaker 1: you know, having to write a certain way which is 358 00:20:20,240 --> 00:20:22,879 Speaker 1: not the way that I write, having to talk a 359 00:20:22,880 --> 00:20:24,720 Speaker 1: certain way, which is not the way that I talk, 360 00:20:25,160 --> 00:20:29,280 Speaker 1: having to go and present to four people in front 361 00:20:29,320 --> 00:20:33,119 Speaker 1: of an academic board to rationalize, and which is of 362 00:20:33,160 --> 00:20:35,040 Speaker 1: course I need to do this and I'm happy to 363 00:20:35,080 --> 00:20:38,399 Speaker 1: do it. But again, like I'm talking of four people 364 00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:40,920 Speaker 1: and I'm terrified the day before I'm talking to with 365 00:20:40,920 --> 00:20:43,639 Speaker 1: a thousand people and I'm i can telling dick jokes 366 00:20:43,680 --> 00:20:48,160 Speaker 1: and having the best time ever, right, and it's just oh, yeah, 367 00:20:48,240 --> 00:20:52,399 Speaker 1: this is And so it's that, what's the room that 368 00:20:52,480 --> 00:20:55,240 Speaker 1: I'm going to grow in? Where do I need to 369 00:20:55,320 --> 00:20:59,360 Speaker 1: go to grow, because what is very easy to do 370 00:21:00,640 --> 00:21:04,200 Speaker 1: is to default to the thing that you're good at, 371 00:21:04,320 --> 00:21:06,920 Speaker 1: or the thing that you're most comfortable with, or the 372 00:21:06,920 --> 00:21:10,639 Speaker 1: thing where you'll get the most praise. Right, I know, 373 00:21:10,840 --> 00:21:13,040 Speaker 1: I can go into some rooms and get all the 374 00:21:13,080 --> 00:21:17,280 Speaker 1: backslaps in the world and all the accolades and your ace. Right, 375 00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:20,240 Speaker 1: my ego fucking loves that, my self esteem loves that, 376 00:21:20,920 --> 00:21:24,000 Speaker 1: my fear and insecurity loves that. Or I can go 377 00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:26,600 Speaker 1: to another room, which is the room I actually need 378 00:21:26,640 --> 00:21:30,680 Speaker 1: to go to if I'm talking about yes, I want 379 00:21:30,680 --> 00:21:33,560 Speaker 1: to learn, grow, evolve, be better. Well, Craig, this is 380 00:21:33,600 --> 00:21:35,640 Speaker 1: the room. It's not the room you want, but it's 381 00:21:35,640 --> 00:21:38,719 Speaker 1: the room you need. And I think that you know, 382 00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:41,760 Speaker 1: you just went for six months or whateverver it was, 383 00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:44,280 Speaker 1: into a room that you needed. I mean, in there 384 00:21:44,440 --> 00:21:47,239 Speaker 1: six years and then I'm sure when I come out 385 00:21:47,320 --> 00:21:49,919 Speaker 1: of this room, I'll go into another room at some stage. 386 00:21:49,960 --> 00:21:55,520 Speaker 1: But it's like that, I think actually choosing that, you know, 387 00:21:55,640 --> 00:21:59,280 Speaker 1: in a strategic intelligence not reckless way, but choosing that 388 00:21:59,760 --> 00:22:03,080 Speaker 1: this comfort, as long as it aligns with the kind 389 00:22:03,119 --> 00:22:06,400 Speaker 1: of gross that you want, I think it's I think 390 00:22:06,400 --> 00:22:11,399 Speaker 1: it's a superpower. But we we spend so much time 391 00:22:11,560 --> 00:22:16,840 Speaker 1: and I'm talking about we generally trying to avoid that room, 392 00:22:17,600 --> 00:22:20,800 Speaker 1: but it's to our own detriment, and when. 393 00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:25,919 Speaker 2: You choose it, you learn so much about yourself. Like 394 00:22:26,200 --> 00:22:28,920 Speaker 2: I always talk about how much I learned stepping into 395 00:22:28,920 --> 00:22:31,640 Speaker 2: the boxing ring and seeing that version of Tiff that's 396 00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:33,520 Speaker 2: in the middle of a fight, that's in vit or flight, 397 00:22:33,600 --> 00:22:37,280 Speaker 2: that can't spin, spin a story or bullshit because the 398 00:22:37,320 --> 00:22:40,480 Speaker 2: reaction is there. You react, and then you go, oh, 399 00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:44,000 Speaker 2: I'm the person that cowers or ducks or this, I'm 400 00:22:44,040 --> 00:22:45,639 Speaker 2: the person that didn't fight, and then I've got to 401 00:22:45,680 --> 00:22:49,680 Speaker 2: do the work to change it. I learned that it's 402 00:22:49,720 --> 00:22:53,040 Speaker 2: getting on this like I would was pacing around beforehand, 403 00:22:53,080 --> 00:22:55,360 Speaker 2: going I'd rather be punched in the face right now, 404 00:22:55,480 --> 00:22:57,640 Speaker 2: right because I'd rather get in the ring and fight, 405 00:22:57,800 --> 00:23:02,800 Speaker 2: because at least people you do a brave thing, Like 406 00:23:02,880 --> 00:23:05,640 Speaker 2: at least if I fail, it's not because I'm shit, 407 00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:08,640 Speaker 2: It's because someone was better on the day. But I'm 408 00:23:08,680 --> 00:23:11,760 Speaker 2: getting on the stage by myself. If I fail, no 409 00:23:11,800 --> 00:23:15,520 Speaker 2: one beat me. I let myself down, or that's the 410 00:23:15,560 --> 00:23:17,480 Speaker 2: story we tell. I haven't let myself down, you know. 411 00:23:17,560 --> 00:23:21,040 Speaker 2: But it was like, oh, I just learned something about 412 00:23:21,280 --> 00:23:24,399 Speaker 2: you know, the story I might cling to about how 413 00:23:24,440 --> 00:23:27,840 Speaker 2: courageous I am or how I do hard things. Half 414 00:23:27,880 --> 00:23:31,040 Speaker 2: my keynote is on our relationship with hard things. I'm 415 00:23:31,080 --> 00:23:33,840 Speaker 2: putting that under the microscope and I just think that's interesting. 416 00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:36,880 Speaker 1: Yeah, well, you're talking about hard things in the middle 417 00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:37,800 Speaker 1: of doing a hard thing. 418 00:23:39,240 --> 00:23:42,600 Speaker 2: It was a sorry, there was a there was a 419 00:23:42,600 --> 00:23:46,280 Speaker 2: speaker who she's a neurosign and she's amazing, and she 420 00:23:46,440 --> 00:23:51,240 Speaker 2: was speaking for the very first time ever on how 421 00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:56,639 Speaker 2: stress affects the brain, and her keynote is exceptional. And 422 00:23:56,680 --> 00:23:59,080 Speaker 2: in the middle of that, I've got goosebumps now every 423 00:23:59,119 --> 00:24:02,199 Speaker 2: time I talk about it, goosebumps. She was the biggest inspiration. 424 00:24:03,040 --> 00:24:08,040 Speaker 2: She was freezing and forgetting, and for the whole forty 425 00:24:08,080 --> 00:24:11,359 Speaker 2: minutes of her keynote, she just kept coming up to 426 00:24:11,400 --> 00:24:16,439 Speaker 2: these huge silences where she just stood and needed to 427 00:24:16,520 --> 00:24:20,840 Speaker 2: go inside and find what the f she was supposed 428 00:24:20,880 --> 00:24:26,399 Speaker 2: to say next, and she I can't tell you. I 429 00:24:26,520 --> 00:24:29,199 Speaker 2: was like, that's the She is the biggest inspiration to 430 00:24:29,240 --> 00:24:33,400 Speaker 2: me in that room, and she's braver than me, because 431 00:24:33,440 --> 00:24:35,000 Speaker 2: I think I would have gone, hey, guys, you know 432 00:24:35,040 --> 00:24:37,120 Speaker 2: what I'm talking about it's happening to me right now. 433 00:24:37,160 --> 00:24:39,240 Speaker 2: Soone'm on of f off out the back like that, 434 00:24:39,359 --> 00:24:43,000 Speaker 2: to just stand there, to not apologize, to not get flustered, 435 00:24:43,240 --> 00:24:46,000 Speaker 2: to not get nerves like obviously she had nerves, but 436 00:24:46,040 --> 00:24:49,399 Speaker 2: she held the space and the whole room just held 437 00:24:49,440 --> 00:24:54,240 Speaker 2: her and loved her for it. Like that is courage. 438 00:24:54,520 --> 00:24:59,280 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's that's that is amazing. That is and for 439 00:24:59,400 --> 00:25:02,840 Speaker 1: people to you know, what was going on and to 440 00:25:02,920 --> 00:25:05,400 Speaker 1: be there and to be okay with that and for her. 441 00:25:06,600 --> 00:25:08,560 Speaker 1: But what I love about that is that is a 442 00:25:08,560 --> 00:25:12,720 Speaker 1: good story. What I love about that is that if 443 00:25:12,760 --> 00:25:17,199 Speaker 1: she keeps going, which I hope she does, she's just 444 00:25:17,240 --> 00:25:19,640 Speaker 1: going to build on that and that'll be that that 445 00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:23,800 Speaker 1: will become part of her story. And that the you know, 446 00:25:23,840 --> 00:25:27,840 Speaker 1: it's the six hundred episodes of the U Project losing money. 447 00:25:27,880 --> 00:25:30,760 Speaker 1: It's that It's like, you know, all the gigs that 448 00:25:30,840 --> 00:25:34,040 Speaker 1: I did before I was any good, you know, before 449 00:25:34,040 --> 00:25:36,680 Speaker 1: I got paid any money, before I got actual money. 450 00:25:36,680 --> 00:25:39,399 Speaker 1: You know, like, yeah, how do you how do you 451 00:25:40,280 --> 00:25:43,480 Speaker 1: how do you become masterful? How do you become highly skilled? 452 00:25:43,520 --> 00:25:46,560 Speaker 1: How do you become how do you become elite? How 453 00:25:46,600 --> 00:25:49,960 Speaker 1: do you optimize your potential? How do you how do 454 00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:51,920 Speaker 1: you get the most out of you? Will you get 455 00:25:52,000 --> 00:25:56,800 Speaker 1: up and you freeze maybe, and and you lose your place, 456 00:25:56,960 --> 00:25:59,639 Speaker 1: and you don't give up, and you stand there and 457 00:25:59,680 --> 00:26:02,720 Speaker 1: you just figure it out and you sold your on 458 00:26:02,840 --> 00:26:05,399 Speaker 1: And then next time you probably won't do that, or 459 00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:08,280 Speaker 1: you might do it less. And then eventually you're going 460 00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:10,920 Speaker 1: to tell this story about the first time you got 461 00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:14,320 Speaker 1: up and what a train wreckord kind of was, but 462 00:26:14,400 --> 00:26:17,840 Speaker 1: also what a massive learning experience it was and how 463 00:26:17,880 --> 00:26:21,240 Speaker 1: it shaped you. You know, this is like pretty much 464 00:26:21,359 --> 00:26:24,080 Speaker 1: everything in life is about how we. 465 00:26:24,040 --> 00:26:30,399 Speaker 2: Respond, and the appreciation for the result comes only because 466 00:26:30,400 --> 00:26:33,679 Speaker 2: of the hard you of it. I am only as elated. 467 00:26:33,800 --> 00:26:35,879 Speaker 2: I was elate. I felt like I'd just had my 468 00:26:35,920 --> 00:26:38,679 Speaker 2: first fight again. I had first fight adrenaline. I had 469 00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:41,919 Speaker 2: first fighted adrenaline. Before speaking on stage, I definitely had 470 00:26:41,960 --> 00:26:44,639 Speaker 2: it for two days afterwards. I felt like I was 471 00:26:44,680 --> 00:26:49,280 Speaker 2: coming down from hard drugs. But that is only that 472 00:26:49,400 --> 00:26:52,639 Speaker 2: is not because of the moment on stage. That is 473 00:26:52,720 --> 00:26:57,560 Speaker 2: because of what I chose not to crumble under in 474 00:26:57,600 --> 00:27:00,280 Speaker 2: the lean up. That is because I know and I 475 00:27:00,359 --> 00:27:03,199 Speaker 2: loved that I came so close to not doing it. 476 00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:10,720 Speaker 1: MM so good. Yeah, it's yeah, well here's my quick story. 477 00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:14,399 Speaker 1: So you know what's going on with my dad, and 478 00:27:15,119 --> 00:27:17,560 Speaker 1: my listeners kind of know. So he's just gone through 479 00:27:17,600 --> 00:27:23,119 Speaker 1: some really difficult stuff. So I had to do I 480 00:27:23,119 --> 00:27:25,359 Speaker 1: had to talk Tuesday morning, and I got off the 481 00:27:25,359 --> 00:27:29,080 Speaker 1: plane Monday evening and found out what was going on 482 00:27:29,119 --> 00:27:32,520 Speaker 1: with dad. So then and then I had which I 483 00:27:32,560 --> 00:27:36,600 Speaker 1: spoke about. I did a podcast about this, which went 484 00:27:36,680 --> 00:27:41,080 Speaker 1: up Monday, I think, but which it just is what 485 00:27:41,119 --> 00:27:45,399 Speaker 1: it is, you know, And but then not sleeping, worrying 486 00:27:45,400 --> 00:27:49,359 Speaker 1: about my dad, who's and then worrying about my mum 487 00:27:49,480 --> 00:27:52,680 Speaker 1: who really you know, my dad's eighty six, my mum's 488 00:27:52,720 --> 00:27:55,399 Speaker 1: eighty six in a few weeks. And it's just really 489 00:27:55,440 --> 00:28:00,359 Speaker 1: complicated and it's honestly, it's pretty difficult, but it is 490 00:28:00,720 --> 00:28:06,480 Speaker 1: what it is, right, and then trying to trying to 491 00:28:07,760 --> 00:28:09,840 Speaker 1: not put it out of your mind but not let 492 00:28:09,880 --> 00:28:13,240 Speaker 1: that destroy you. And then I had to get up 493 00:28:13,880 --> 00:28:17,320 Speaker 1: less than twenty four hours, you know, so like I 494 00:28:17,400 --> 00:28:19,399 Speaker 1: would have slept, I don't know how much I slept, 495 00:28:19,400 --> 00:28:21,360 Speaker 1: but not more than an hour. And then I got 496 00:28:21,440 --> 00:28:22,720 Speaker 1: up and I had to go and talk to a 497 00:28:22,800 --> 00:28:28,120 Speaker 1: room full of lawyers, God bless them, and be funny 498 00:28:28,440 --> 00:28:32,440 Speaker 1: and tell great stories and be inspirational and share great ideas. 499 00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:36,800 Speaker 1: And you can't walk in and go listen, I know 500 00:28:36,840 --> 00:28:40,400 Speaker 1: you're paying me five X, but I'm just going to 501 00:28:40,400 --> 00:28:43,920 Speaker 1: give you one x value because I've had a hard night. Yeah, 502 00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:46,160 Speaker 1: and can I tell you about what's going on in 503 00:28:46,160 --> 00:28:49,680 Speaker 1: my purse? You can't do that, understandably, and neither should you. 504 00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:54,120 Speaker 1: So you know this is and then well what is that? Well, 505 00:28:54,120 --> 00:28:58,920 Speaker 1: that's life. It's like, yeah, if I and by the way, 506 00:28:59,360 --> 00:29:02,400 Speaker 1: you know it, if me staying up there or flying 507 00:29:02,400 --> 00:29:04,600 Speaker 1: home straight away wouldn't have made any difference to what 508 00:29:04,800 --> 00:29:07,120 Speaker 1: was going on with my dad for anyone who's thinking 509 00:29:07,160 --> 00:29:12,080 Speaker 1: that otherwise I would have flown home. But yeah, it's 510 00:29:12,120 --> 00:29:15,320 Speaker 1: in that. Oh, well this is. It doesn't get much 511 00:29:15,440 --> 00:29:19,840 Speaker 1: worse than this in terms of like when somebody that 512 00:29:19,920 --> 00:29:25,840 Speaker 1: you love is is, you know, in a really challenging situation, 513 00:29:26,280 --> 00:29:30,560 Speaker 1: and my energy and my emotions and my mind and 514 00:29:30,640 --> 00:29:34,560 Speaker 1: to a great extent my body were almost not present. 515 00:29:35,040 --> 00:29:37,120 Speaker 1: But then you've got to then you've got to rock up, 516 00:29:37,160 --> 00:29:40,040 Speaker 1: and you've got to go and breathe and just be 517 00:29:40,120 --> 00:29:46,080 Speaker 1: totally here, totally nowhere else. And you know that's that's 518 00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:50,720 Speaker 1: the thing, is like that is life Sometimes like life 519 00:29:50,800 --> 00:29:53,960 Speaker 1: is just a fuck fest, and in the middle of 520 00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:58,880 Speaker 1: that we need to try to find a way to 521 00:29:58,920 --> 00:30:01,040 Speaker 1: be whatever it is you need to be in that 522 00:30:01,120 --> 00:30:05,920 Speaker 1: moment to get through it. And then then go to 523 00:30:05,960 --> 00:30:07,880 Speaker 1: the Quantus Club and have a little cry in the 524 00:30:07,880 --> 00:30:10,440 Speaker 1: bathroom crate you can do it there, have a little 525 00:30:10,440 --> 00:30:12,680 Speaker 1: tandy in the corner, eat your own body weight in 526 00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:15,600 Speaker 1: Quantus Club food, do whatever you want, but for this 527 00:30:15,720 --> 00:30:17,440 Speaker 1: hour you need to be amazing. 528 00:30:18,640 --> 00:30:24,680 Speaker 2: How do you compartmentalize or give yourself a space or 529 00:30:24,720 --> 00:30:28,280 Speaker 2: a moment to be in the middle of what's going on, 530 00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:31,160 Speaker 2: and then in order to park it to function? How 531 00:30:31,160 --> 00:30:32,600 Speaker 2: do you navigate those two? 532 00:30:33,960 --> 00:30:36,320 Speaker 1: So what I do, and again this is not a 533 00:30:36,360 --> 00:30:39,720 Speaker 1: recommendation nor advice, is I totally feel what I'm feeling. 534 00:30:41,400 --> 00:30:44,440 Speaker 1: And then I don't try to not feel any of it. 535 00:30:44,480 --> 00:30:46,680 Speaker 1: I don't try to I don't put my head in 536 00:30:46,680 --> 00:30:48,680 Speaker 1: the sand, I don't pretend it's not going on. But 537 00:30:48,760 --> 00:30:53,920 Speaker 1: about literally only about five ten minutes before I then 538 00:30:54,040 --> 00:30:56,440 Speaker 1: just try to clear my mind, get really kind of 539 00:30:58,160 --> 00:31:02,680 Speaker 1: still and calm, and I go into it with that 540 00:31:02,800 --> 00:31:07,920 Speaker 1: awareness but without being focused on it. And what I 541 00:31:07,960 --> 00:31:12,360 Speaker 1: did was which I wasn't. I kind of waxed and waned. 542 00:31:13,640 --> 00:31:17,240 Speaker 1: And in the last kind of five to eight minutes 543 00:31:17,280 --> 00:31:21,400 Speaker 1: of my presentation, I told the audience, because we're talking 544 00:31:21,440 --> 00:31:24,320 Speaker 1: about performing under pressure, we're talking about dealing with adversity, 545 00:31:24,360 --> 00:31:27,440 Speaker 1: we're talking about being able to be, you know, the 546 00:31:27,520 --> 00:31:32,000 Speaker 1: best version of us that we could be despite you know, 547 00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:35,400 Speaker 1: the stuff that goes on, right, And I said, so, 548 00:31:36,640 --> 00:31:39,640 Speaker 1: I said to them, I've been back, going back and 549 00:31:39,680 --> 00:31:43,000 Speaker 1: forth mentally as to whether or not I would share 550 00:31:43,040 --> 00:31:45,040 Speaker 1: this with you, but I think it kind of, you know, 551 00:31:45,360 --> 00:31:48,440 Speaker 1: without being self indulgent, without looking for any kind of 552 00:31:48,520 --> 00:31:51,680 Speaker 1: anything from you, let me just tell you about my 553 00:31:51,760 --> 00:31:56,360 Speaker 1: last eighteen hours. And I told them, and it's like 554 00:31:57,280 --> 00:32:01,760 Speaker 1: half of them almost cried all of a sudden, just 555 00:32:01,840 --> 00:32:04,400 Speaker 1: being very you know, i'd been very real and raw, 556 00:32:04,680 --> 00:32:07,840 Speaker 1: but being very real and raw in the last ten minutes, 557 00:32:08,280 --> 00:32:14,760 Speaker 1: It's like, Oh, it created a level of connection that 558 00:32:15,680 --> 00:32:18,320 Speaker 1: I hadn't until it. There was connection and there was 559 00:32:18,400 --> 00:32:20,840 Speaker 1: rapport and it was good. But all of a sudden, 560 00:32:20,840 --> 00:32:23,440 Speaker 1: we opened a door, maybe three doors, and we went 561 00:32:24,040 --> 00:32:29,840 Speaker 1: like three levels deeper. And yeah, and I feel like 562 00:32:30,360 --> 00:32:33,800 Speaker 1: that was almost the deal maker, you know, in terms 563 00:32:33,840 --> 00:32:36,280 Speaker 1: of them going, oh, that was fucking great. And by 564 00:32:36,320 --> 00:32:39,120 Speaker 1: the way, you know, and half the people in the 565 00:32:39,200 --> 00:32:42,160 Speaker 1: room would have come up. A few people came up, 566 00:32:42,200 --> 00:32:45,400 Speaker 1: got me a hug. A few people just quite a 567 00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:48,400 Speaker 1: few people just said, you know, thanks for sharing that. 568 00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:51,160 Speaker 1: That kind of put things into perspective. I hope your 569 00:32:51,240 --> 00:32:53,440 Speaker 1: dad's right and all of that stuff. You know, But 570 00:32:54,400 --> 00:32:56,400 Speaker 1: and whether or not you're a corporate speaker or you're 571 00:32:56,440 --> 00:32:58,640 Speaker 1: a plumber, you know, you go to work and you 572 00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:01,720 Speaker 1: do you know, plumbers have bad days, Plumbers have dads 573 00:33:01,720 --> 00:33:04,800 Speaker 1: that get sick. You know, it's school teachers have you know, 574 00:33:04,960 --> 00:33:08,040 Speaker 1: everyone's got to deal with someone in their world getting 575 00:33:08,080 --> 00:33:11,440 Speaker 1: sick or dying or you know, we've all got to 576 00:33:11,480 --> 00:33:15,400 Speaker 1: deal with injustice. Sadly, we've all got to deal with 577 00:33:15,560 --> 00:33:21,440 Speaker 1: unfairness and pain and loss, and you know, while we're 578 00:33:21,440 --> 00:33:24,960 Speaker 1: still going to be human and like, I don't pretend 579 00:33:25,200 --> 00:33:28,680 Speaker 1: it's not hard. I just go, all right, well, in 580 00:33:28,720 --> 00:33:34,080 Speaker 1: the middle of this, how do I navigate this? How 581 00:33:34,120 --> 00:33:39,160 Speaker 1: do I walk my own talk while not being a sociopath? 582 00:33:40,160 --> 00:33:42,520 Speaker 1: You know, like I've still got to feel what I've 583 00:33:42,520 --> 00:33:46,200 Speaker 1: got to feel, and you know, there are times where 584 00:33:46,200 --> 00:33:50,960 Speaker 1: I think, all right, well, for now, this is just 585 00:33:51,000 --> 00:33:53,000 Speaker 1: how I need to be in this moment, and I 586 00:33:53,040 --> 00:33:56,400 Speaker 1: can do that. Doesn't mean I'm denying anything that's going 587 00:33:56,440 --> 00:34:00,240 Speaker 1: on or denying my emotions. But yeah, so that that 588 00:34:00,520 --> 00:34:04,400 Speaker 1: was an interesting and it's been an interesting week since, 589 00:34:04,440 --> 00:34:08,200 Speaker 1: you know. And that's like here's the here's the thing, right, 590 00:34:08,239 --> 00:34:09,960 Speaker 1: there are just and it's going to happen to you 591 00:34:10,040 --> 00:34:14,360 Speaker 1: one day, right, a version of that, And like the 592 00:34:14,440 --> 00:34:17,400 Speaker 1: thing is that there's just always going to be things 593 00:34:17,400 --> 00:34:20,840 Speaker 1: that affect us that are real tough, that are actually 594 00:34:20,920 --> 00:34:24,200 Speaker 1: out of our control. And so our challenge is not 595 00:34:24,360 --> 00:34:28,279 Speaker 1: to control it or try to control it, but rather 596 00:34:28,440 --> 00:34:32,719 Speaker 1: to do what we can for those people, love them, 597 00:34:32,960 --> 00:34:36,320 Speaker 1: serve them, look up whatever we can, but then really 598 00:34:36,400 --> 00:34:40,160 Speaker 1: to manage ourselves around the stuff that we can't manage, 599 00:34:40,920 --> 00:34:46,800 Speaker 1: you know. And and two, yeah, it's it's an interesting 600 00:34:47,080 --> 00:34:50,640 Speaker 1: it's an interesting time. And what I find, as somebody 601 00:34:50,680 --> 00:34:56,400 Speaker 1: who's done eight years of conversations like this, it's like 602 00:34:56,520 --> 00:35:01,880 Speaker 1: almost a moment and even bigger moment of self awareness 603 00:35:01,880 --> 00:35:04,399 Speaker 1: for me because I go, all right, mister fucking self help, 604 00:35:04,480 --> 00:35:08,440 Speaker 1: mister the U project, mister ah be all you can be, 605 00:35:08,640 --> 00:35:11,319 Speaker 1: mister can you perform under pressure, mister, What do you 606 00:35:11,440 --> 00:35:15,279 Speaker 1: like when the shit is yeah? Like? What are you like? Like? 607 00:35:15,320 --> 00:35:17,200 Speaker 1: What do you like like? What do you like when 608 00:35:18,719 --> 00:35:21,360 Speaker 1: you know when no one's looking? What do you like 609 00:35:21,480 --> 00:35:24,799 Speaker 1: when you know you're not getting a fucking any kind 610 00:35:24,800 --> 00:35:29,640 Speaker 1: of social emotional trophy for this? You know? That's that's 611 00:35:29,640 --> 00:35:32,600 Speaker 1: the thing. And I think that's why so much of 612 00:35:34,520 --> 00:35:40,960 Speaker 1: our evolution, our becoming better, whatever that means for us, building, resilience, building, 613 00:35:41,000 --> 00:35:47,040 Speaker 1: skill building, competence, doing, thinking, being better, so much of 614 00:35:47,040 --> 00:35:49,239 Speaker 1: it is about what happens when no one's looking or 615 00:35:49,239 --> 00:35:53,200 Speaker 1: giving a fuck or cheering. And I think that that's 616 00:35:53,760 --> 00:35:54,960 Speaker 1: you know, that's part of the key. 617 00:35:55,760 --> 00:35:58,279 Speaker 2: And the choice to share that when you did is 618 00:35:58,400 --> 00:36:01,200 Speaker 2: such a gift, Like, I don't think you understand how 619 00:36:01,280 --> 00:36:06,200 Speaker 2: much that would solidify everything you spoke about, Like, because 620 00:36:06,239 --> 00:36:08,920 Speaker 2: when people think now and something hard happens and they 621 00:36:08,920 --> 00:36:11,719 Speaker 2: think of all the theory you'd left them with, they'll go, yeah, 622 00:36:11,760 --> 00:36:14,560 Speaker 2: and you know what he was going through this when 623 00:36:14,600 --> 00:36:18,000 Speaker 2: he told us that, and he still showed up, you know, 624 00:36:18,120 --> 00:36:20,799 Speaker 2: and didn't show it by suppressing it and hiding it 625 00:36:20,840 --> 00:36:23,719 Speaker 2: and pretending it wasn't happening, just showed up. 626 00:36:27,080 --> 00:36:29,480 Speaker 1: I'm going to tell you another story. This is probably 627 00:36:29,480 --> 00:36:31,799 Speaker 1: not a good idea, but fuck it. So one of 628 00:36:31,840 --> 00:36:38,120 Speaker 1: my best friends in the world passed away, Rob Dixon, Dicko. Gee, 629 00:36:38,120 --> 00:36:39,600 Speaker 1: I don't even know how many He must have been 630 00:36:39,680 --> 00:36:44,359 Speaker 1: the best part of fifteen or thirteen years ago. And 631 00:36:45,080 --> 00:36:50,640 Speaker 1: I had a corporate gig and my corporate gig was 632 00:36:50,640 --> 00:36:55,239 Speaker 1: two o'clock and Dicko's funeral was midday and where the 633 00:36:55,360 --> 00:37:00,600 Speaker 1: church was. Where the church was was about eight minute 634 00:37:00,640 --> 00:37:05,600 Speaker 1: motorbike ride from where my gieg was. So this is 635 00:37:05,680 --> 00:37:09,480 Speaker 1: my plan, in hindsight, not the best. So I went 636 00:37:09,520 --> 00:37:11,600 Speaker 1: to one of my best friend's funeral. I was a 637 00:37:11,800 --> 00:37:18,279 Speaker 1: fucking mess, as all of us were. And he yeah, 638 00:37:18,320 --> 00:37:21,399 Speaker 1: this is the saddest story ever. Anyway, he passed away, 639 00:37:21,440 --> 00:37:24,200 Speaker 1: and so did his two sons who were little boys, 640 00:37:25,920 --> 00:37:30,560 Speaker 1: and his wife, Dusty, beautiful lady she was. It was 641 00:37:30,600 --> 00:37:35,120 Speaker 1: the saddest funeral you could imagine anyway, and way sadder 642 00:37:35,120 --> 00:37:37,160 Speaker 1: for the family than me. But you know, like him 643 00:37:37,200 --> 00:37:40,719 Speaker 1: and I were great friends, as he was with many people. Right. 644 00:37:40,800 --> 00:37:44,480 Speaker 1: But so I thought, it's going to be about now. 645 00:37:44,600 --> 00:37:46,920 Speaker 1: Then I'll have about now to regroup and go and 646 00:37:46,960 --> 00:37:49,239 Speaker 1: do this thing. I'll get through it. It had been 647 00:37:49,280 --> 00:37:51,719 Speaker 1: booked forever. There was quite a lot of people at 648 00:37:51,760 --> 00:37:55,560 Speaker 1: this gig. It was just me, not like there was 649 00:37:55,600 --> 00:37:57,359 Speaker 1: eight other speakers. I could pull out. 650 00:37:57,400 --> 00:38:06,640 Speaker 4: And and so I the funeral went forever and a 651 00:38:06,760 --> 00:38:07,480 Speaker 4: quarter to two. 652 00:38:08,440 --> 00:38:10,799 Speaker 1: So I've got a gig in fifteen minutes. I had 653 00:38:10,800 --> 00:38:18,040 Speaker 1: to leave. And so I rode to this place. I 654 00:38:18,040 --> 00:38:19,759 Speaker 1: don't even know why I'm telling this story, this is 655 00:38:19,840 --> 00:38:22,840 Speaker 1: just but I rode to this place crying, so on 656 00:38:22,960 --> 00:38:26,080 Speaker 1: my motorbike, in my helmet, crying. And I get there 657 00:38:26,120 --> 00:38:28,959 Speaker 1: and I've got to try and and I'm a fucking wreck. 658 00:38:29,040 --> 00:38:34,320 Speaker 1: I'm in no state to do this right. And anyway, 659 00:38:34,520 --> 00:38:37,520 Speaker 1: I go into the bathroom. I get there like four 660 00:38:37,520 --> 00:38:40,800 Speaker 1: minutes before I go into the bathroom, I wash my face, 661 00:38:40,880 --> 00:38:45,719 Speaker 1: I get my shit together, and I start and I 662 00:38:45,840 --> 00:38:53,279 Speaker 1: do my thing, and I can't remember anyway. Towards the end, 663 00:38:54,640 --> 00:39:00,120 Speaker 1: I mentioned what my what had happened not and I 664 00:39:00,160 --> 00:39:04,040 Speaker 1: lost my shit. I lost my shit, and I didn't 665 00:39:04,200 --> 00:39:06,520 Speaker 1: like thought, but I just and I was in front 666 00:39:06,520 --> 00:39:10,240 Speaker 1: of this whole group, and I just I started crying, 667 00:39:11,080 --> 00:39:15,240 Speaker 1: and then I started to apologize for crying. And then 668 00:39:16,160 --> 00:39:19,480 Speaker 1: like one of the ladies actually came up and hugged me, 669 00:39:19,640 --> 00:39:24,000 Speaker 1: which was beautiful, but then it made it worse, Like 670 00:39:24,600 --> 00:39:28,439 Speaker 1: now I'm really fucked. Oh my god, I'd forgotten about 671 00:39:28,440 --> 00:39:31,600 Speaker 1: that till we started talking about my dad's thing. But yeah, 672 00:39:31,719 --> 00:39:35,320 Speaker 1: it's like, I've had some really interesting moments on stage, 673 00:39:35,400 --> 00:39:39,759 Speaker 1: and I like, I look at that, and I think 674 00:39:39,840 --> 00:39:44,280 Speaker 1: they could have been really angry with me, because nobody 675 00:39:44,360 --> 00:39:47,719 Speaker 1: wants that dude up on the stage, Like, oh, we 676 00:39:47,800 --> 00:39:52,640 Speaker 1: get in this inspirational guy who starts crying and I'm like, 677 00:39:53,239 --> 00:39:56,120 Speaker 1: fuck and hell, if you guys want your money back 678 00:39:56,239 --> 00:39:59,760 Speaker 1: and more, let me know. But they were very gracious 679 00:39:59,800 --> 00:40:01,520 Speaker 1: and very kind. 680 00:40:01,680 --> 00:40:04,640 Speaker 2: What did you learn? Did you learn something out of 681 00:40:04,640 --> 00:40:07,120 Speaker 2: that about you personally or professional? 682 00:40:07,640 --> 00:40:17,840 Speaker 1: I it's like, yeah, what did I learn? Well, practically, 683 00:40:17,880 --> 00:40:21,040 Speaker 1: I would, I realized later I shouldn't. I didn't know 684 00:40:21,200 --> 00:40:22,960 Speaker 1: that it was going to be. I thought there would 685 00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:24,680 Speaker 1: be an hour's gap and I would be able to 686 00:40:24,680 --> 00:40:28,439 Speaker 1: get myself together, but there wasn't. So in hindsheight, maybe 687 00:40:28,440 --> 00:40:30,279 Speaker 1: I shouldn't have done it. But as it turns out, 688 00:40:30,440 --> 00:40:33,640 Speaker 1: they I got more positive. I didn't really get any negative. 689 00:40:33,640 --> 00:40:37,279 Speaker 1: Maybe they just felt sorry for me. But I just 690 00:40:37,320 --> 00:40:44,160 Speaker 1: think that you know, without being without being an attention seeker. 691 00:40:44,400 --> 00:40:47,600 Speaker 1: Or it's like when I did the podcast the other 692 00:40:47,719 --> 00:40:51,520 Speaker 1: day about and the podcast was called I've had a 693 00:40:51,520 --> 00:40:54,560 Speaker 1: pretty shit week or whatever. Right now, I've never had 694 00:40:54,600 --> 00:40:57,879 Speaker 1: a negative title in all of my podcasts, and I've 695 00:40:57,960 --> 00:41:01,480 Speaker 1: never got on and ever try to seek sympathy or 696 00:41:01,560 --> 00:41:05,040 Speaker 1: pity or and I definitely wasn't doing it with that. 697 00:41:06,719 --> 00:41:12,160 Speaker 1: But my motivation was, or my reasoning was, I really 698 00:41:12,239 --> 00:41:15,360 Speaker 1: had had had a ship week with other people as well, 699 00:41:15,880 --> 00:41:17,799 Speaker 1: and I thought, I don't want to and I was 700 00:41:17,840 --> 00:41:21,000 Speaker 1: doing a solo one. It was just me, I don't 701 00:41:21,000 --> 00:41:23,960 Speaker 1: want to get on here and pretend I'm happy. I 702 00:41:24,040 --> 00:41:26,759 Speaker 1: don't want to get on here, and I thought, why 703 00:41:26,800 --> 00:41:30,720 Speaker 1: don't I just get on and without making it, without 704 00:41:30,719 --> 00:41:34,840 Speaker 1: trying to make it depressing or sad, just go. So 705 00:41:35,000 --> 00:41:37,600 Speaker 1: this is, you know, this is the guy that's always 706 00:41:37,640 --> 00:41:42,280 Speaker 1: trying to inspire and inform and educate and all that stuff. 707 00:41:42,840 --> 00:41:46,320 Speaker 1: Tell you a story makes you laugh. Here's that guy 708 00:41:46,480 --> 00:41:50,480 Speaker 1: who's honestly had a hunt of a week. Let's be honest, right, 709 00:41:50,520 --> 00:41:55,680 Speaker 1: and just to talk about that, because I think, you know, 710 00:41:55,920 --> 00:41:59,040 Speaker 1: and then to talk about how i'd kind of navigated 711 00:41:59,080 --> 00:42:02,040 Speaker 1: that that I did a stellar job. But I could 712 00:42:02,080 --> 00:42:06,560 Speaker 1: have done worse. I guess. I think that's part of 713 00:42:08,560 --> 00:42:11,760 Speaker 1: you know, the biggest compliment for me is that about 714 00:42:11,800 --> 00:42:15,880 Speaker 1: this show is that people relate to it, really relate 715 00:42:15,920 --> 00:42:19,919 Speaker 1: to it, and relate to the conversations and hopefully us 716 00:42:20,040 --> 00:42:25,000 Speaker 1: today and and rather than getting on going, Hey everybody, 717 00:42:25,080 --> 00:42:27,839 Speaker 1: here's how you deal with sadness. Here's how you deal 718 00:42:27,880 --> 00:42:31,279 Speaker 1: with depression and tough situations. Get out your pen and 719 00:42:31,360 --> 00:42:37,120 Speaker 1: paper step one. Step one, think positive things. Step two, 720 00:42:37,320 --> 00:42:41,160 Speaker 1: get in nature, get your toes in the sands. Step three, 721 00:42:41,719 --> 00:42:45,839 Speaker 1: just self, feel what you feel. Step four, what's your 722 00:42:45,920 --> 00:42:49,719 Speaker 1: rom Come, We'll be back tomorrow. You know, it's like 723 00:42:51,000 --> 00:42:53,880 Speaker 1: it's sometimes I think, fuck, is this even good to 724 00:42:54,000 --> 00:42:56,879 Speaker 1: listen to? Like when I finished that solo the other 725 00:42:56,960 --> 00:43:00,279 Speaker 1: day with me just banging on about the week I 726 00:43:00,320 --> 00:43:02,960 Speaker 1: sent it to Melissa or Melissa had a listen and 727 00:43:03,000 --> 00:43:05,640 Speaker 1: I went, was that dog shit? And she goes, no. 728 00:43:07,239 --> 00:43:10,279 Speaker 1: I'm like, because I feel like I don't want to 729 00:43:10,280 --> 00:43:12,800 Speaker 1: put something up that is just going to make people 730 00:43:12,880 --> 00:43:16,120 Speaker 1: sad or depressed or but I think that's the beauty 731 00:43:16,160 --> 00:43:18,560 Speaker 1: of even You know, in life, there are peaks and troughs, 732 00:43:18,680 --> 00:43:22,160 Speaker 1: and in eight years of broadcasting, a show there are 733 00:43:22,200 --> 00:43:26,360 Speaker 1: peaks and troughs. And I think that people when I 734 00:43:26,440 --> 00:43:31,520 Speaker 1: look up to someone or have learned from someone and 735 00:43:31,560 --> 00:43:34,440 Speaker 1: it seems like they never have a problem, well I 736 00:43:34,480 --> 00:43:38,360 Speaker 1: can't relate really, But when I see that, oh, they're 737 00:43:38,800 --> 00:43:44,239 Speaker 1: navigating hard things as well, I'm more likely to lean 738 00:43:44,280 --> 00:43:48,160 Speaker 1: in and pay attention and I can still learn, you know, 739 00:43:48,200 --> 00:43:51,080 Speaker 1: and I can go, oh, well, this happened to Craig 740 00:43:51,120 --> 00:43:53,960 Speaker 1: and this is what he did. Which is not say 741 00:43:54,000 --> 00:43:56,080 Speaker 1: anyone else should do what I did or react how 742 00:43:56,120 --> 00:43:59,080 Speaker 1: I did, but just knowing that, yeah, no, of course 743 00:43:59,120 --> 00:44:01,440 Speaker 1: things are shit times. Of Course they get angry, of 744 00:44:01,480 --> 00:44:04,600 Speaker 1: course they get frustrated. Of course I want to fucking 745 00:44:04,760 --> 00:44:07,600 Speaker 1: punch someone in the face. I wouldn't. I wouldn't though, 746 00:44:08,080 --> 00:44:12,520 Speaker 1: but that you know, that feeling, it's like, you know, sometimes, 747 00:44:12,640 --> 00:44:14,680 Speaker 1: especially when you've got an eighty six year old dad, 748 00:44:14,800 --> 00:44:20,480 Speaker 1: sometimes without saying anything specifically, fuck, sometimes I feel like 749 00:44:20,680 --> 00:44:25,640 Speaker 1: for some people, oh, he's just a problem. It's like 750 00:44:25,840 --> 00:44:29,960 Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, we're here, I'm sorry. My dad's 751 00:44:30,040 --> 00:44:32,879 Speaker 1: eighty six, and that you have to you know, you're 752 00:44:32,920 --> 00:44:37,200 Speaker 1: like fucking hell, you know, it's like ah, But then 753 00:44:37,719 --> 00:44:41,440 Speaker 1: me being that way, outwardly fixes nothing, in fact creates 754 00:44:41,480 --> 00:44:47,000 Speaker 1: more problems. So me needing to and also understanding the 755 00:44:47,040 --> 00:44:50,680 Speaker 1: greater context. And you know, in hospitals like we were in, 756 00:44:50,719 --> 00:44:54,600 Speaker 1: where everyone's trying and it's busy and they're under resourced 757 00:44:54,840 --> 00:45:00,160 Speaker 1: and over demanded and if that's a word, and yeah, me, 758 00:45:00,160 --> 00:45:01,920 Speaker 1: me trying to manage me in the middle of all 759 00:45:01,960 --> 00:45:04,400 Speaker 1: of that, so that I'm the best for Dad and 760 00:45:04,440 --> 00:45:07,960 Speaker 1: the best for Mum and also a decent human for 761 00:45:08,280 --> 00:45:12,400 Speaker 1: other people to be around. Yeah, it's an exercise in 762 00:45:12,600 --> 00:45:16,440 Speaker 1: self control and self management. And you know, I. 763 00:45:16,360 --> 00:45:20,799 Speaker 2: Think it's also really nice that episode. Like one thing 764 00:45:20,880 --> 00:45:24,880 Speaker 2: that you're probably not the very, very very best at 765 00:45:26,200 --> 00:45:30,120 Speaker 2: is letting people hold space for you and care about you. 766 00:45:30,440 --> 00:45:34,040 Speaker 2: And I think letting that that's soft. Fuck that letting 767 00:45:34,080 --> 00:45:36,200 Speaker 2: the t one that I. 768 00:45:36,160 --> 00:45:38,680 Speaker 1: Didn't need any of that. Fuck that, I'm an island. 769 00:45:39,400 --> 00:45:43,279 Speaker 1: I'm an island humanity, I'm an island. Don't throw your 770 00:45:43,280 --> 00:45:45,400 Speaker 1: boat over here. Fuck off with your boat. 771 00:45:46,320 --> 00:45:49,080 Speaker 2: But just not like not just being showing up for 772 00:45:49,239 --> 00:45:54,759 Speaker 2: typ community to be a lesson, but let them hold 773 00:45:54,840 --> 00:45:57,920 Speaker 2: the space and go, hey, we're fucking here for you. 774 00:45:58,000 --> 00:46:01,000 Speaker 2: Like I don't think you understand how beneficial that is 775 00:46:01,040 --> 00:46:04,719 Speaker 2: for you, Like we want to do that. Everyone that 776 00:46:04,800 --> 00:46:08,920 Speaker 2: follows you in that group wants to wants to say 777 00:46:09,000 --> 00:46:12,480 Speaker 2: something to let you know that they're all here and 778 00:46:12,480 --> 00:46:16,720 Speaker 2: that they love that you're human, and like that's a gift. 779 00:46:17,920 --> 00:46:19,719 Speaker 1: Sorry, you broke up. I didn't hear any of that. 780 00:46:20,400 --> 00:46:22,680 Speaker 2: Sorry, and you're also a bit of a fuck. 781 00:46:22,480 --> 00:46:28,600 Speaker 1: With Yeah, well, thank you, and thank you to everybody 782 00:46:28,600 --> 00:46:30,960 Speaker 1: for all the nice things I've got, like lots and 783 00:46:31,000 --> 00:46:36,320 Speaker 1: lots of lots of love and lots of yeah, lots 784 00:46:36,320 --> 00:46:39,000 Speaker 1: of support and also you know, via a messenger and 785 00:46:39,080 --> 00:46:41,640 Speaker 1: all kinds of shit. It's been I don't have a 786 00:46:41,719 --> 00:46:44,840 Speaker 1: chicken casserole, so if somebody wants to reach out with food, 787 00:46:45,480 --> 00:46:48,800 Speaker 1: that's probably my love language. It's probably my love language, 788 00:46:49,080 --> 00:46:59,600 Speaker 1: chicken casserole. No pressure the OH box, all right, before 789 00:46:59,640 --> 00:47:01,480 Speaker 1: you make me cry, I'm going to wind it up. 790 00:47:01,680 --> 00:47:05,680 Speaker 1: If it's been bued. Congrats on your speaking kind of 791 00:47:05,800 --> 00:47:08,640 Speaker 1: it's not your debut, but on a big stage. That 792 00:47:08,880 --> 00:47:11,719 Speaker 1: was your speaking debut to the world. That's fucking you 793 00:47:11,880 --> 00:47:15,000 Speaker 1: opening the door to the big time. So well done. 794 00:47:15,040 --> 00:47:19,279 Speaker 1: Congrats and thanks for hanging out with me for an 795 00:47:19,320 --> 00:47:19,759 Speaker 1: hour or so. 796 00:47:20,440 --> 00:47:20,839 Speaker 2: Thank you