Speaker 1: I'll get a team. Welcome to another installment of for
Speaker 1: You project. My name's Craig Garthy. But doctor Jodi Richards
Speaker 1: and Tiffany and Cook we're all here. Slow down a
Speaker 1: little bit, Taytay, take your time. Mum used to tell
Speaker 1: me when I was little, ta take your time because
Speaker 1: I used to talk too fast. It's hard to believe, Tiff,
Speaker 1: isn't it?
Speaker 2: Who wit you? Talking fast? Talking lots?
Speaker 1: Slow down, talking a lot?
Speaker 3: Believe it?
Speaker 1: Yeah, the fat, attention seeking only child. Doctor Jody Richardson.
Speaker 1: Welcome back. How are you?
Speaker 3: I'm good. I'm really good.
Speaker 4: Actually, just come back from a little holiday, so that
Speaker 4: was nice.
Speaker 1: Where'd you go?
Speaker 3: Went to the Gold Coast? Typical Australian family holiday destination.
Speaker 1: It's no, It's no India, is it, Tiff.
Speaker 2: It's no India, that's for sure. No mountain.
Speaker 4: I know I've been following you online. Tif How incredible
Speaker 4: is that? A little piece of Everest.
Speaker 2: A little bit of not Everest, but a little bit
Speaker 2: of the Himalayas that I'm carrying around everywhere I go.
Speaker 3: Wow, what.
Speaker 1: I'm interested to and I mean this genuinely, I'm interested
Speaker 1: to see the ongoing the flow on, and that's not
Speaker 1: there's no doubt there, there's just curiosity. Are you interested yourself? Me?
Speaker 2: I am yeah, I actually am like I'm in the
Speaker 2: middle of it and I'm kind of sitting on the
Speaker 2: outside at the same time. It's it's it's a thing.
Speaker 2: It's a whole thing. I didn't expect.
Speaker 1: Are you being the observer of youew or trying to
Speaker 1: be the observer of you? Have you getting your ear
Speaker 1: cart on?
Speaker 2: Kind of kind of just what it happens. It's very
Speaker 2: interesting because we live in this world where you and
Speaker 2: I and doctor Jodi, we all we talk about this
Speaker 2: stuff and we're interested in it, and we're in the
Speaker 2: middle of it and we're doing it. And then sometimes
Speaker 2: things come left to field and this whole new shift
Speaker 2: and this whole newtive and it's like, oh yeah, all right,
Speaker 2: let's evaluate all of this. It's really cool.
Speaker 1: And you know what's interesting is us pseudo academics. Well,
Speaker 1: Jody is an actual academic. I'm a pretend academic, but
Speaker 1: we think we're all over it because we're fucking researching
Speaker 1: the mind. Right, I'm doing a PhD. I'm researching the mind.
Speaker 1: I'm researching how people think. Well, guess what the fucking
Speaker 1: the mystics have known this ship for thousands of years,
Speaker 1: millions of years. You're way way late to the party.
Speaker 1: Harps jumbo, do better. All the spiritual gurus know the
Speaker 1: shit that you're now learning.
Speaker 2: It's like funny, though, you come to a conclusion and
Speaker 2: then the way you The thing that seems to excite
Speaker 2: a lot of us the most is when we can
Speaker 2: link it back to the early days and it's like see,
Speaker 2: it's like, see, I found this new thing that already existed.
Speaker 1: Well, I remember when I started, Jody, We'll get to
Speaker 1: you eventually, you know.
Speaker 3: Chilling.
Speaker 1: I remember when I started my PhD. On day one
Speaker 1: or day two, I was I was just trying to
Speaker 1: find a bit of the origin story of self awareness,
Speaker 1: you know. And was it Socrates I think said the
Speaker 1: beginning of wisdom is to know thyself. Well that was
Speaker 1: written I think two and a half thousand years ago.
Speaker 1: So this motherfucker was talking about self awareness before Jesus
Speaker 1: was even here, right, And I'm thinking, so, I'm not
Speaker 1: really breaking any new ground over here at all. I'm
Speaker 1: just picking up rocks that have been picked up a
Speaker 1: million times before and going, hey, look, everyone a rock
Speaker 1: and all the fucking dead stoics and philosophers and you know,
Speaker 1: theologians are rolling their eyes going, no shit, you fucking
Speaker 1: knew bie. Like literally, there's no new wisdom, is there?
Speaker 1: I mean there's nothing. There's new data, and there's new research,
Speaker 1: and there's new technology, but in terms of just human wisdom,
Speaker 1: I don't really think there's a lot of new ship.
Speaker 1: What do you think, Jodi?
Speaker 3: I think that.
Speaker 4: We need to find ways for the wisdom to relate
Speaker 4: to us as individuals, and so we can read books,
Speaker 4: we can listen to podcasts, we can watch YouTube videos.
Speaker 4: But what you've done tip is you've traveled and you've
Speaker 4: taken time out, and you've experienced a new way of
Speaker 4: thinking and living, and it always opens your mind when
Speaker 4: you're traveling. But I do think that original ideas aren't
Speaker 4: as common as we'd like to think. But the wisdom
Speaker 4: that we develop within ourselves comes through making sense of
Speaker 4: what others have said before us and linking that with
Speaker 4: how we operate.
Speaker 3: In our day to day kind of lives.
Speaker 4: I think that there's lots of wisdom to be had,
Speaker 4: but we become wise when we find ways.
Speaker 3: To make it our own. I suppose is what I'm
Speaker 3: trying to say.
Speaker 1: Isn't it interesting how you can have the myriad of
Speaker 1: conversations that all three of us have had and all
Speaker 1: of our listeners have had. And then you know, tif,
Speaker 1: you and I and you and many others on your
Speaker 1: show have spoken about, you know, life and thinking and
Speaker 1: perspective and gratitude and fucking being still and consciousness and
Speaker 1: awareness and purpose, and we have all of these meaningful
Speaker 1: Go look at us, Look how fucking smart we are.
Speaker 1: Look at the quality of this fucking exchange, this cerebral
Speaker 1: fucking gem, you know, And then you just go walk
Speaker 1: in bare feet on a mountain on the other side
Speaker 1: of the world and meet some beautiful people who go,
Speaker 1: you know, and then it's like you have these light
Speaker 1: bulbs that you never have in a conversation.
Speaker 2: I was thinking about wisdom just just today. Actually not.
Speaker 2: There's knowledge, and we do all this knowledge seeking and
Speaker 2: then we apply strategies and practices and we put it
Speaker 2: into place and we evolve ourselves and we take some
Speaker 2: of that as wisdom. But then there was just like
Speaker 2: I experienced these moments where a whole level of wisdom
Speaker 2: just shifts in you and you go I know things
Speaker 2: differently now, not through knowledge or the strategies or of practice.
Speaker 2: Some wisdom came to me, But I think that's the
Speaker 2: difference between wisdom and knowledge, and I don't think it
Speaker 2: can be taught. And I think everyone's version of wisdom
Speaker 2: is different. It's a personal thing. Or that's my interpretation
Speaker 2: of that word at this moment.
Speaker 1: I reckon, I reckon, you could exchange. I could be wrong,
Speaker 1: But what you're talking about as wisdom could be insight
Speaker 1: or awareness. Also, Yeah, it's like I've got a different
Speaker 1: level of understanding or insight or awareness now as well.
Speaker 1: I think those things are into and I think, like,
Speaker 1: you know, there's knowledge and then there's what you do
Speaker 1: with the knowledge. Now, what you do with the knowledge,
Speaker 1: that's an indicator of wisdom or intelligence. Perhaps, you know
Speaker 1: a lot of people know a lot of shit but
Speaker 1: don't operationalize it in a way that makes their life better,
Speaker 1: you know, which is why we have unhealthy doctors and
Speaker 1: unhealthy personal trainers. No disrespect to doctors or trainers, but
Speaker 1: it's true. It's like knowing stuff doesn't guarantee anything other
Speaker 1: than you know stuff. You know? Yeah, So, Dr Jodi,
Speaker 1: how have you.
Speaker 3: Been I have been good. Actually, I've been.
Speaker 4: Experiencing some new ways of recovery after exercise and just
Speaker 4: to kind of like help me settle after some really
Speaker 4: busy weeks of speaking and travel, and that includes ice
Speaker 4: babs and saunas and frequencies for ner acoustics.
Speaker 3: I've been diving into.
Speaker 4: Some different experiences, which has been pretty awesome. And I
Speaker 4: realized I thought I was a hero when I stayed
Speaker 4: in the ice bath for ten minutes when it is
Speaker 4: nine degrees and then the next time I went back
Speaker 4: and it was six degrees, I was in pain. Two
Speaker 4: minutes was all I could manage. So yeah, like life's
Speaker 4: been good. I've had lots of opportunities to connect and
Speaker 4: speak and families well, and yeah, just a little family
Speaker 4: getaway has been a nice recharge to kind of get
Speaker 4: us through to the rest of the year and really
Speaker 4: thinking more deeply myself about a more balanced life with
Speaker 4: more meditation and more mindfulness. I really want to carve
Speaker 4: out more time for quiet because I tend not to
Speaker 4: stop very much.
Speaker 3: So yeah, that's kind of what's been going on with me.
Speaker 1: Beautiful, beautiful summary. What was that term you used? Did
Speaker 1: you say neuroacoustics or something.
Speaker 4: Oh. Yes, there's science around the frequency of sounds and
Speaker 4: music and how it can Actually it's quite interesting because
Speaker 4: there's a at the Recovery Lab here in Mornington there
Speaker 4: is a session called newcom and you hyphenalm and picture
Speaker 4: this harps. You said you've been in a hammock all
Speaker 4: day Tomorrow you can try this. Picture this a recliner armchair.
Speaker 4: If it's cool, they'll put a heated electric blanket under you.
Speaker 4: You lie back with a weighted blanket on top. You
Speaker 4: put a light blocking set of very comfortable goggles on,
Speaker 4: and then you put headphones on that play music at
Speaker 4: frequencies and it moves between the two sides of the headphones.
Speaker 4: Put in left and right speakers and the I'm starting
Speaker 4: to look into the science of it. But the idea
Speaker 4: is that the frequency and that the sounds themselves can
Speaker 4: really lull you into a very grounded state.
Speaker 3: In your nervous system.
Speaker 4: It's incredibly relaxing and really a very nice way to
Speaker 4: kind of recalibrate. So yeah, So also that some of
Speaker 4: the research you're showing that if you listen to music
Speaker 4: at forty hurts that it can aid with learning motor
Speaker 4: skills as well as cognitively as well. So I'm at
Speaker 4: the tip of the iceberg with this reading that I've
Speaker 4: been doing.
Speaker 3: But it's interesting, it's interesting.
Speaker 1: I've opened that door a little bit too. So there's
Speaker 1: a thing called binaural beats. B I na you are
Speaker 1: al binaural beats and also white noise, brown noise, green noise.
Speaker 1: That yeah, all operate at those different hurts and frequencies.
Speaker 1: And it is funny, It's like, and you think, I
Speaker 1: think also with this, I could be wrong, but I
Speaker 1: think that different frequencies or hurts have a slightly different
Speaker 1: impact on different people. It's not every hurts range produces
Speaker 1: the same response in different people. But I've got a
Speaker 1: bunch of stuff that I play at night when I
Speaker 1: go to bed, and it's all that. It's that white noise,
Speaker 1: it's that brown noise, it's that. Yeah, have you opened
Speaker 1: that door at all? Tip? The old you know, the calm,
Speaker 1: the farm music, the fucking the calm app.
Speaker 2: Have I ever I used to listen to. I used
Speaker 2: to subscribe to a beautiful meditation that you put your
Speaker 2: noisecouncsling headphones on and the sound would move around your head.
Speaker 2: It was like to buy neural beats as well. Yes,
Speaker 2: you could hear somebody walking on leaves around your head.
Speaker 2: It was beautiful. Now, I listened to a yoga nidra
Speaker 2: before bed, and that just puts me straight to sleep.
Speaker 1: You know. One of the interesting things to come out
Speaker 1: when I would sit with people. I sat with a
Speaker 1: new lady this morning. I won't say her name, shout out.
Speaker 1: She knows who she is. But sometimes I'll sit with
Speaker 1: someone and I go, all right, let's talk about what
Speaker 1: you want and don't want. So we go through this
Speaker 1: whole checklist of things in their life, you know, from
Speaker 1: house to car, to job, to relationships to you know.
Speaker 1: But ultimately then we come back to the psychological and
Speaker 1: emotional and you might say spiritual depending on your You know,
Speaker 1: where you're at and what you think and what you believe.
Speaker 1: But so many people, apart from the basics of I
Speaker 1: want to be able to pay the bills and feed
Speaker 1: the kids, which is of course understandable, but beyond that,
Speaker 1: and this relates to you, doctor Jody of course, and
Speaker 1: all of us, but they just want to be calm,
Speaker 1: like they just don't want they don't want that inner turmoil.
Speaker 1: It's like the thing that they want is really a
Speaker 1: conduit to to be calm, to be less stressed, to
Speaker 1: not be the overthinker, to not be agitated, to not
Speaker 1: be worried. And it's like when you go, well, what's
Speaker 1: the opposite of all of that shit? It's peace, you know,
Speaker 1: it's tranquility, it's calm. It's it's that you know, like
Speaker 1: we all apart from we want a few other things.
Speaker 1: Of course we want purpose and focus, but none of us,
Speaker 1: you know, don't want to have that internal state of
Speaker 1: joy and calm, do we?
Speaker 3: I agree, And I think that we live a life.
Speaker 4: I just had a conversation for my podcast this morning
Speaker 4: with a really interesting guest, and we were talking. She
Speaker 4: was talking about all the exit ramps that we have
Speaker 4: from disconnection. Sorry, all the exit ramps that we have
Speaker 4: was the raising shoes from connection with each.
Speaker 3: Other and with ourselves.
Speaker 4: And I was just thinking, literally, people can go from
Speaker 4: the very moment they wake and usually pick up their
Speaker 4: phone to the moment they go to bed, usually on
Speaker 4: the phone in bed, scrolling or whatever, and very little
Speaker 4: space for the brain to just rest for contemplation, for
Speaker 4: that calm in the nervouses and even in the car
Speaker 4: this morning.
Speaker 3: Our daughter was on her phone.
Speaker 4: She's limited to two hours a day, but she was
Speaker 4: in the car and I said, put it down.
Speaker 3: We don't have to have the radio on.
Speaker 4: We can just actually give our brains a little break,
Speaker 4: a little rest from the input.
Speaker 3: And I don't know what.
Speaker 4: Is that drives us all so furiously to feel every
Speaker 4: minute of every day, but that sense of calm is
Speaker 4: within reach for us if we know how. And before
Speaker 4: joining you here, I did a non sleep deep rest
Speaker 4: because I honestly could have just fallen asleep and had
Speaker 4: a nap. So I set my alarm because I feel
Speaker 4: super tired. Probably daylight savings. But there are tools that
Speaker 4: we can use. We just need to prioritize it that
Speaker 4: we have access to that more than perhaps what we
Speaker 4: might realize, but we never stopped to use them because
Speaker 4: we feel like, oh, I got to keep going, there's
Speaker 4: no time. And the irony of it is that we
Speaker 4: are cut our lives shorter and we're missing out on
Speaker 4: actually enjoying the people around us and the things that
Speaker 4: we're doing because we're just always looking for, you know,
Speaker 4: what we need to tick off and move to next.
Speaker 4: So yeah, it's definitely something I've been thinking about and
Speaker 4: talking to my eye rolling teenager.
Speaker 1: Isn't that you sound like a mum, but it is
Speaker 1: so true. Like I'm I've become aware that I'm on
Speaker 1: my phone more than I should be. I need to
Speaker 1: be on my phone at times because of my work,
Speaker 1: but I'm on it way more than I need to be.
Speaker 1: You know, my intention every morning, unless I'm coaching someone
Speaker 1: or meeting with someone. But I get to the cafe
Speaker 1: at quarter past six, and you know, I fuck around
Speaker 1: fifteen minutes. This is my plan. And then from kind
Speaker 1: of six thirty to seven thirty, just emails, planning, writing notes,
Speaker 1: you know, blah blah blah. But sometimes I look up
Speaker 1: and at seven thirty and I've been fucking around for
Speaker 1: an hour and a quarter. Like just the thing, too,
Speaker 1: is like, once the algorithm or whatever it is, understands
Speaker 1: what you pay attention to, I'm fucked because all it's
Speaker 1: got to do is just oh, look like with Tiff,
Speaker 1: all it is is, here's another puppy.
Speaker 3: You know, baby'll get me a baby go for me.
Speaker 1: It's like, oh, here's another motibike, brand new motibike who
Speaker 1: does a million miles an hour. You know, or whatever
Speaker 1: it is. But yeah, I've I've really had to. I've
Speaker 1: started to put my phone in the other room. And
Speaker 1: because even when I doing some things, but even now
Speaker 1: I'm aware, it's like it's here, it's upside down and
Speaker 1: it's turned off. But I I wish I had remembered
Speaker 1: before the thing to put it in the other room
Speaker 1: because I'm better. I know that's done. But even if
Speaker 1: it's turned off and facing down, it still occupies three
Speaker 1: percent of my brain. Yeah, nowhere near me. Yeah, my
Speaker 1: focus is better go on, Yeah, totally.
Speaker 3: And that that's I think.
Speaker 4: I've heard Paul Taylor talk about this for about the
Speaker 4: research showing that if it's just oh Christie, doctor Christy Goodman,
Speaker 4: perhaps it was probably both. If it's even within our eyesight, eyeline,
Speaker 4: you know that it does, it does. It's got this pool.
Speaker 4: It's like this magnetic pool, and even if we're not
Speaker 4: picking it up, we can withstand that it is occupying
Speaker 4: a certain portion of our attention. And it's designed that way.
Speaker 4: And you know, I think about, oh my gosh, like
Speaker 4: kids with phones and the algorithm. And one thing that
Speaker 4: I learned recently at a conference. I don't know whether
Speaker 4: or not you've heard this Tier four harps, but something
Speaker 4: like TikTok for example, you would think that the videos
Speaker 4: that you like, you know, you actually actively press the
Speaker 4: heart button on, would be the ones that the algorithm
Speaker 4: would say, yes, she likes this, he likes that, send more.
Speaker 4: In fact, the algorithm is designed to send you more
Speaker 4: of what you spend time on, even if you don't
Speaker 4: actively engage with the post. And there's fascinating and quite
Speaker 4: terrifying research around eating disorders, for example, whereby if you
Speaker 4: in starting to get that kind of information in your feed,
Speaker 4: you might even get videos that are really unappealing, like
Speaker 4: they're hard to look at because there might be somebody
Speaker 4: who's extremely underweight, for example, but we tend to focus
Speaker 4: on those, and we might linger a little bit longer
Speaker 4: on a video like that, and that young women with
Speaker 4: eating disorders are getting served up just a disproportionate amount
Speaker 4: of these kinds of videos.
Speaker 3: And yet, like, intellectually we know that we're on our.
Speaker 4: Phones and it's junk or it's just time wasting, but
Speaker 4: it's incredibly hard to actually go, oh, snap out of it,
Speaker 4: put it down and get on with something more meaningful.
Speaker 4: It's hard for us as adults, so it's near impossible
Speaker 4: for our teens so tough.
Speaker 1: I've had this conversation with somebody who works in their
Speaker 1: space and there are actually influences in inverted commas who
Speaker 1: teach generally young girls, but we'll say young people how
Speaker 1: to essentially how to be anorexic and how to dress,
Speaker 1: how to get away with it, how to trick people
Speaker 1: to think that you're eating you know. Yeah, it's there's
Speaker 1: some there's some devastatingly toxic stuff, you know. At our disposal,
Speaker 1: I want to I want to ask both you a
Speaker 1: hardish question. I'll start with you Jody, so tif this
Speaker 1: gives you a little bit of think time because it's
Speaker 1: the same question right now for you, doctor Jody, what
Speaker 1: is being courageous for you? What's the thing that you
Speaker 1: need to be courageous about that for you is scary,
Speaker 1: but you know you need to lean into it or
Speaker 1: step into it to whatever. What's the thing that scares
Speaker 1: you but you know you need to do it?
Speaker 3: Oh well, I can't.
Speaker 4: Anything that is big enough in my life to be
Speaker 4: scaring me at the moment. But I've been thinking about
Speaker 4: what do I need to introduce into my life that
Speaker 4: will scare me somewhat right, And I'm not practicing karate anymore,
Speaker 4: and that was that took courage and commitment to not
Speaker 4: only obviously stick to the training but also grade. And
Speaker 4: I have been in a couple of competition fights, which honestly,
Speaker 4: I'll try to see if I can dig out of video,
Speaker 4: Craig and send it to you.
Speaker 3: I think I've said that to you before. I'll see
Speaker 3: if I can find one.
Speaker 4: I'm kind of feeling at a point in my life
Speaker 4: where doing the things that require courage Now. I guess
Speaker 4: recently getting in a nice bath that was hard, but
Speaker 4: it's you know, it's just being comfortable. Sorry, it's not
Speaker 4: really been. It was just about tolerating the discomfort. I
Speaker 4: don't think that really required courage. Yeah, so you've really
Speaker 4: got me thinking, you know, I guess I need to
Speaker 4: show up more online. I need to spend more time
Speaker 4: kind of promoting I guess what I do that That
Speaker 4: does make me feel anxious, but I do it. And
Speaker 4: I've got so many blocks on my social media on
Speaker 4: my phone during the day that it's a there's a
Speaker 4: lot of friction to even post a quick.
Speaker 3: But yeah, you've you've asked a.
Speaker 4: Question that I can't really answer, and not because I'm
Speaker 4: not willing, like I'm always willing to say.
Speaker 3: You know, we've got some really.
Speaker 4: Hard stuff going on at the moment with like Pete's
Speaker 4: mum has Alzheimer's and my my dad's in a world
Speaker 4: of pain, and there are very big challenges we're facing.
Speaker 4: But I don't I can't think of anything that's drawing
Speaker 4: on a huge amount of courage at the moment, and
Speaker 4: it's something I'd like to address.
Speaker 3: So I'm not sure how.
Speaker 1: Wow, maybe things are good. That's always good. What about you,
Speaker 1: Tippany and cook? Is there anything that brings to mind
Speaker 1: when I ask that?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think especially coming back and having some clarity
Speaker 2: about what I need to do and what I want
Speaker 2: to do and what's not working. It takes courage when
Speaker 2: you wake up each day and you realize you have
Speaker 2: to change the routine and the behaviors that you now know,
Speaker 2: Like it's because you know when you realize what's underneath,
Speaker 2: Like when for people like me, when you sit and
Speaker 2: actually realize why do I stay busy twenty four to seven?
Speaker 2: Like one of the things when I got to India,
Speaker 2: one of the questions I thought of from nowhere? Is
Speaker 2: living alone really the best for me? Should I get
Speaker 2: out of my comfort zone and get a bigger apartment
Speaker 2: and just share it with another human because my social
Speaker 2: health probably requires some love.
Speaker 1: But also you do have that baseball cap that says fuck.
Speaker 3: Off, though exactly, I'll tell you know what.
Speaker 2: I'll tell you. This feels funny, and like when I
Speaker 2: was in India, this took courage and I realized the
Speaker 2: significance of it afterwards. We shared some really deep stuff
Speaker 2: in our first night on the mountain with the other people.
Speaker 2: Everybody shared things they'd never shared I'd share. I shared
Speaker 2: things in full that I'd never shared with anyone as well,
Speaker 2: So we had a really big connection. A lot of
Speaker 2: people on this show. No, my background is of childhood
Speaker 2: sexual abuse, so there's a lot of stuff there with
Speaker 2: men and trust and all of the things, and testing
Speaker 2: myself when I talked about that. And then I had
Speaker 2: one night in Delhi before Shannon flew back from the
Speaker 2: mountain and I was like, well, I can't I live
Speaker 2: the hotel. It was very scary, and Dellie and I
Speaker 2: went to the gym and I was chatting to this guy,
Speaker 2: this guy that lived in South Indian India and he
Speaker 2: invited me to come for dinner. After we were chatting Brady,
Speaker 2: he goes, I'm going to go for dinner. Do you want?
Speaker 2: Do you want to come? And I said yes? And
Speaker 2: then I was like sitting in my room, going, You're
Speaker 2: in a country you don't know, that's terrifying, with more
Speaker 2: people in the whole place than there is in all
Speaker 2: of Australia. And You're going to go meet some stranger
Speaker 2: in the lobby who's going to take you to some
Speaker 2: place that he says he's going to take you. I'm like,
Speaker 2: is this a good idea? No one knows where you are?
Speaker 2: And this is I put the story on Facebook because
Speaker 2: it was quite funny what happened, Like we got a
Speaker 2: bloody tire blowout in the you, but then we had
Speaker 2: to cature two trains to get there. And I'm thinking,
Speaker 2: am I like? Am I going to go to dinner?
Speaker 2: Am I going to be on the news next week?
Speaker 2: But afterwards, the significance of trusting myself to judge the
Speaker 2: character of the man I just met and to set
Speaker 2: a boundary and to speak up and to be clear
Speaker 2: in what I was agreeing to was a really really
Speaker 2: courageous thing for me to do and it felt significant.
Speaker 1: So yeah, awesome, awesome, And how did you so you
Speaker 1: didn't get chopped up and turned into a cast role,
Speaker 1: So that's good. I thought that that was ever going
Speaker 1: to happen. But how so how did you feel? Firstly,
Speaker 1: was it a good night?
Speaker 2: Yeah? It was brilliant, Like we went to Old Deli
Speaker 2: and it was chaos, right, and I wouldn't have seen that.
Speaker 2: I wouldn't And I said to him, this was really
Speaker 2: I'm really glad I said yes to doing this. I
Speaker 2: would never have seen this at this time of night,
Speaker 2: and I never would have had that crazy funny story.
Speaker 2: And he was really polite and really accommodating and it
Speaker 2: was wonderful.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's great, that's great. How do you I mean,
Speaker 1: you two as it's a bit different for you, Jody
Speaker 1: because you're married, but you've both been through like navigating
Speaker 1: a big part of your life relationships. And I'm a dude,
Speaker 1: so I don't get it like a woman gets it,
Speaker 1: because you know, I don't have to assess risk in
Speaker 1: the way that you two have to assess risk. Right,
Speaker 1: how do you how did you navigate all of that? Jody?
Speaker 1: With figuring out who to trust and who not to trust,
Speaker 1: and what to say yes to and know to. Is that, like,
Speaker 1: is that a real cognitive psychological thing or is that
Speaker 1: an instinctive or intuitive thing? What was that? What is
Speaker 1: that for you?
Speaker 3: I mean, I was.
Speaker 4: Reflecting a couple of days ago, how lucky I was.
Speaker 4: I didn't get myself into any real trouble as sort
Speaker 4: of a teenager or young adult going out and being
Speaker 4: very trusting, being very trusting, and not having any sense
Speaker 4: of listening to my gut or even perhaps noticing that
Speaker 4: my guts maybe telling me don't and then ignoring it.
Speaker 4: I started to become again like with karate, I started
Speaker 4: that when I was forty. That was when I first
Speaker 4: really started to think about, you know, my own gut
Speaker 4: and listening to that, my own personal safety. I was
Speaker 4: terrified as a new driver at eighteen nineteen years of age,
Speaker 4: when the Paul Charles Daniel, the serial killer in Frankston
Speaker 4: was you know, taking women and killing them, and one
Speaker 4: of them died right near my high school. One of
Speaker 4: them died right near where I had netle training. It
Speaker 4: was all very close to home, so I had this
Speaker 4: sense of fear. But I didn't have this instinctive understanding
Speaker 4: about what my body could tell me about safety and danger.
Speaker 4: And you know what you were saying before, Tiff, when
Speaker 4: you said you were like asking the question, and Craig
Speaker 4: you asked about courage. You know, I guess I went
Speaker 4: straight to, oh, courage has to be you know, something big.
Speaker 4: But it I think sometimes courage is just facing the
Speaker 4: world every day. It doesn't always have to be, you know,
Speaker 4: a raw It can be a little whisper sometimes just
Speaker 4: to say no or to do something that's a little
Speaker 4: bit out of your comfort zone. Anything like that can
Speaker 4: take courage. So my answer before was kind of about
Speaker 4: the big things, but it does take courage to, like tif,
Speaker 4: when you're in a situation like that, to be invited
Speaker 4: somewhere and to be offered an opportunity and then to
Speaker 4: listen to that guard instinct and to say, actually, something
Speaker 4: about this does doesn't feel right.
Speaker 3: I am always on alert. I am always with.
Speaker 4: My head on a sivol when I'm walking to my car,
Speaker 4: you know, sometimes parked in multi story car parks in Melbourne.
Speaker 4: When I'm speaking at an event and I'm walking there
Speaker 4: on my own, I'm on high alert now and much
Speaker 4: more tuned in to myself. But you know, when my
Speaker 4: dad was in hospital recently after having a stroke and
Speaker 4: I was walking from the emergency department back to my car,
Speaker 4: my brother was visiting. I said to him, gosh, it's
Speaker 4: a long dark walk for any nurses who are parked
Speaker 4: over here, and he said, I would have never thought
Speaker 4: of that.
Speaker 3: It would never have.
Speaker 4: Crossed my mind, the safety considerations, and so it's very
Speaker 4: front of.
Speaker 3: Mine for me now.
Speaker 4: But yeah, gosh, I put myself in some positions when
Speaker 4: I was younger that I could have been in trouble.
Speaker 4: But thankfully, you know, I'm not in a casserole somewhere either.
Speaker 1: Thankfully, I think I love this conversation because I'm the same.
Speaker 1: I would think about it, but only because of I
Speaker 1: spend time with people like you two, right, But in
Speaker 1: my natural habitat, I would never think about it. It's
Speaker 1: like nearly every night in my life, many nights, probably
Speaker 1: three hundred nights a year, I go for a walk
Speaker 1: in the dark late and I go I walk in
Speaker 1: bare feet, and I walk around suburb and I have
Speaker 1: headphones on. So if someone hock and let's not put
Speaker 1: any suggestions out there, but you know, it's like, I
Speaker 1: don't even think about it, and if I see someone
Speaker 1: walking towards me, I have no fear. I'm not saying
Speaker 1: that's because I'm a fucking legend. I'm not, you know,
Speaker 1: but I just don't whereas if I was, if I was,
Speaker 1: you know, a smaller, less strong female, I guess I
Speaker 1: would probably walk to the other side of the road
Speaker 1: or maybe he fucking you know. But yeah, when you're
Speaker 1: a dude and you're big and kind of strong and whatever, yeah,
Speaker 1: we don't have to think about that, you know, And
Speaker 1: so it's such a different like doing the same thing
Speaker 1: as a different experience, right, TIV.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you just made me think of I was walking
Speaker 2: home one day and I was just near my house
Speaker 2: and in the dark, and there was this person walking
Speaker 2: towards me and a bit wobbly and out of sorts,
Speaker 2: and you know when people look like, oh, this person
Speaker 2: looks under the influence on high alert. And from a distance,
Speaker 2: they looked up and was a female, and she smiled
Speaker 2: and she said hi or said something, and she had
Speaker 2: a physical some sort of a physical disability that was
Speaker 2: making her walk like that. And I felt like this
Speaker 2: rush of two emotions. I felt really grateful that she,
Speaker 2: as a female, obviously knew it was dark and there
Speaker 2: was something odd about how she was walking and that
Speaker 2: would elicit fear in somebody else. And then I felt
Speaker 2: really kind of guilty at myself for judging someone who
Speaker 2: had to highlight that and have a disability and was
Speaker 2: thinking more of me than them, Like it was, Yeah, I.
Speaker 1: Don't think I don't think you judged. I think that's
Speaker 1: just like your brain's job is to protect you, so
Speaker 1: your brain recognizes things, and it would have been you know,
Speaker 1: it could have been in nine out of ten, on
Speaker 1: nine turn out of twenty instances, someone kind of stumbling
Speaker 1: towards you would have meant something different. So there's no
Speaker 1: conscious nasty judgment in that. But another just will finish
Speaker 1: this bit of the conversation. Anyway, if I'm walking in
Speaker 1: the dark and somebody's on the same side of the
Speaker 1: street walking towards me, and it's a female, I will
Speaker 1: cross the road so they don't feel scared. Or if
Speaker 1: I walk out my side gate, you know where that
Speaker 1: is tif right, If I walk out my side gate
Speaker 1: and somebody is two steps ahead of me as I
Speaker 1: walk out, and it's a lady I will not follow them.
Speaker 1: You know. It's like I'm heading left and they're walking left.
Speaker 1: They're two steps in front of me. I walk out
Speaker 1: the gate. Now I'm fucking six feet behind them walking.
Speaker 1: I know that that's potentially fucking terrifying. So I'll walk
Speaker 1: to the other side of the road and head in
Speaker 1: the direction, but not near. I just I'm very you know,
Speaker 1: I'm very aware of that. Like most of the people
Speaker 1: that I coach and mentor and most of our listeners
Speaker 1: and most of the people who come to my workshops, women,
Speaker 1: and so I just I have this, and I'm very
Speaker 1: grateful for my job because it's given me an insight
Speaker 1: and an awareness that I would, you know, if I
Speaker 1: was no disrespect to the plumbers, But if I was
Speaker 1: a plumber, I wouldn't have this, you know, this level
Speaker 1: of awareness that I have because of my job, although
Speaker 1: maybe maybe plumbers do, I don't know.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I love that, Jody.
Speaker 1: We're not going yet, but you and I are speaking
Speaker 1: at you and I are talking at a gig next
Speaker 1: week a what do we call it? Do we call
Speaker 1: it a collai? It's called a late and it's being
Speaker 1: run by no Elevate.
Speaker 3: Isn't it no relate late relate but.
Speaker 1: Good thing, good thing. I'm not in charge of pr
Speaker 1: Jody and I are talking at an event called Relate,
Speaker 1: which is being put on by eighty nine point nine
Speaker 1: l F in Melbourne's Positive Alternative and we're doing Tuesday
Speaker 1: night and Wednesday night at two different locations. And what's
Speaker 1: hilarious is one hundred years ago I used to do
Speaker 1: a morning show on light FM called the Grand Standards
Speaker 1: every Saturday with Jane O'Brien, the gorgeous Jon O'Brien for years.
Speaker 1: Well I'm trying, By the way, do you know who
Speaker 1: Jan O'Brien is, either of you to I don't so
Speaker 1: lovely Jane fucking hell. I'll get back to the topic
Speaker 1: in the moment, but this is worth dtering. So Jane
Speaker 1: is an exercise physiologist. She's a gun, super smart. I
Speaker 1: don't say this lightly, one of my top ten favorite
Speaker 1: people in the world. And I know a lot of
Speaker 1: people and just the most beautiful, generous soul. And I
Speaker 1: can't talk too much or I get teary, but but
Speaker 1: oh I take a breath, so.
Speaker 3: Thank your time.
Speaker 1: I'm a big baby. So anyway, she had cystic fibrosis,
Speaker 1: which if you know anything about cystic fibrosis, it's not
Speaker 1: consistent with a long life. And she had a thing
Speaker 1: called bronchie extasis, which is worse right, And so her
Speaker 1: lung capacity was down to I think somewhere around thirty percent.
Speaker 1: And I will fuck this story up a little bit,
Speaker 1: but this is as well as I know it anyway.
Speaker 1: So we finished working together years ago. But after we
Speaker 1: finished working, she just got sicker and sicker to the
Speaker 1: point where she needed a double lung transplant. Oh gosh,
Speaker 1: that was emotional, And isn't it funny how things I'm
Speaker 1: fucking like people I care about, oh, which I care
Speaker 1: about most people, doesn't take much. I'm a big fucking
Speaker 1: big baby anyway, So yes, we're coming.
Speaker 3: Back to this. I'm a big baby. But finish what
Speaker 3: you were saying.
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, no, I love crying on my own podcast.
Speaker 1: I didn't cry everyone. I almost cried, or I cried
Speaker 1: a little bit. But Jane was Jane ended up in
Speaker 1: hospital and intensive care needing a double lung transplant, on
Speaker 1: a waiting list, and it was not looking great and
Speaker 1: she was pretty much at death's door. And I might
Speaker 1: fuck this bit up, so I might have to correct
Speaker 1: this in another episode, but my understanding is that she
Speaker 1: was very close to where they were about to switch
Speaker 1: everything off and say, you know, and her husband Pete,
Speaker 1: who also I love, who's also a beautiful human, he
Speaker 1: basically said, just give her another day or so, just
Speaker 1: give her another day or so. And that day, I
Speaker 1: think it was, I don't know, a few hours after
Speaker 1: he pleaded with the medical staff to give her a
Speaker 1: little bit more time. She got some lungs, and she
Speaker 1: got some lungs, and so she's now ten months down
Speaker 1: the track, and she's very alive, still recovering, and still
Speaker 1: has a very, very whispery voice. I don't know how
Speaker 1: I started talking about Jane. I can't remember the origin
Speaker 1: story for this, but light FM. Oh that's right, thanks Tiff. So, yeah,
Speaker 1: we did Jane, and I had Jane and I had
Speaker 1: a show for a very long time. And it's like,
Speaker 1: you know, do you ever do Sometimes I'm a shit friend.
Speaker 1: It's like I love people, but I feel like, because
Speaker 1: she had all this going on, so we were talking, talking,
Speaker 1: and then in the middle of all of it, and
Speaker 1: I feel like I wasn't the best friend and I
Speaker 1: meant to. I should have rung her a month or
Speaker 1: two ago. I haven't spoken her for a while, and
Speaker 1: I rang her last week and even ringing, I felt
Speaker 1: guilty to ring, but then I couldn't leave it any
Speaker 1: longer and I just started with I started with I'm
Speaker 1: a shit friend. I apologize. I love you, I'm shit.
Speaker 1: You're a better human than me. Right But anyway, anyway,
Speaker 1: that was a story no one needed here. But thank god, literally,
Speaker 1: thank god she's on the mend and shout out to
Speaker 1: you Joanie and family. But anyway, so you and I
Speaker 1: are doing a gig for Light of FM. Tell everyone
Speaker 1: what it's about because it's free. I don't know if
Speaker 1: there are any tickets still available, but give us the snapshot.
Speaker 4: Yeah, So Tuesday the fifteenth and Wednesday the sixteenth, they're
Speaker 4: the same event, essentially in two different locations. So one's
Speaker 4: in the east of Melbourne and one is in the west.
Speaker 4: And I don't have the exact details of the locations,
Speaker 4: but you'll find them on the website, which is eighty
Speaker 4: nine point nine the light dot com dot are you
Speaker 4: and yeah, it's they're free events for obviously you're speaking,
Speaker 4: I'm speaking, doctor Danny Cheer is speaking. He's a child
Speaker 4: and an adolescent psychiatrist. But it's not a parenting event. It's
Speaker 4: an event, an event for people who want to come
Speaker 4: along and learn ideas and get strategies and have connection
Speaker 4: with people like us and each other who can help change,
Speaker 4: you know, how they're experiencing their mental health. And I'm
Speaker 4: going to be speaking about the science of happiness and wellbeing,
Speaker 4: so I'm not going to be talking about anxiety per se.
Speaker 4: And yeah, they are magnificent events. I had the joy
Speaker 4: of speaking last year and gosh, we must have had
Speaker 4: about eight hundred odd people in the room. And the
Speaker 4: connection people have with each other as well as you know,
Speaker 4: with those of us that are lucky enough to have
Speaker 4: a chance to get the microphone, very very special. So yeah,
Speaker 4: free tickets. Need to reserve your seat by the website.
Speaker 1: You know. I don't know if I should tell this story,
Speaker 1: but by the way, everyone, if you want to come along,
Speaker 1: go to the tickets are free, which is an amazing,
Speaker 1: an amazing opportunity. I think, not to see me, but
Speaker 1: see the other two will be good. I'm up the end.
Speaker 1: I've been put up the back, so you can leave
Speaker 1: after the first two if you want. But what was
Speaker 1: it going to say to.
Speaker 4: You were going to tell a story that you said
Speaker 4: you didn't think you should tell. But I think that's
Speaker 4: every reason to tell it.
Speaker 1: That's right. So there was a point in time, like
Speaker 1: I was working at Lighter FM, right, And it's not
Speaker 1: like I was the most I was probably not in
Speaker 1: some ways the best fit, but in some ways not
Speaker 1: the best fit because I'm me and it was it's
Speaker 1: now more a it's still a Christian based station, but
Speaker 1: it's fair to say that I wasn't the high water up.
Speaker 1: But how you know, a person of that faith should
Speaker 1: perhaps behave And I think what happened was I could
Speaker 1: be wrong. I think they discovered I'd written a book
Speaker 1: with fuck on the front, and I think I think
Speaker 1: they well, I think they knew that, but I think
Speaker 1: they started to get feedback from some of the listeners
Speaker 1: and not my listeners, but just some of the people
Speaker 1: that knew, Oh, they've got this guy on the show
Speaker 1: on the station that has written a book called Stop
Speaker 1: Fucking Around, and this is meant to be so yeah.
Speaker 1: I So we had a bit of a chat and
Speaker 1: I went listen, it's probably it's best for you and
Speaker 1: best for me. And then I got a phone call
Speaker 1: a month ago from MJ. Want who's is the program director,
Speaker 1: isn't he?
Speaker 3: I think of listener engagement there he.
Speaker 1: Is, and he's like, mate, we would love you to
Speaker 1: come and speak at this light event. I go, well,
Speaker 1: you know, I say fuck right, and he's like he laughed,
Speaker 1: and he goes, yeah, we're well aware. I go, you
Speaker 1: know that, And I think I think he was saying
Speaker 1: something that they're they've evolved a little bit. There are
Speaker 1: probably a little bit more, you know, So I'll try
Speaker 1: to keep the fucks to a minimum next Tuesday and Wednesday.
Speaker 1: Jodie is my long winded kind of message.
Speaker 4: Yeah, now look at you know when I when they started,
Speaker 4: we were talking about them producing my podcast.
Speaker 3: We had lots of chats m J.
Speaker 4: And me, and we you know, he said, you know
Speaker 4: that the station has listeners who are you know, there
Speaker 4: for the Christian content and you know, you know, really
Speaker 4: clear on their faith. There are those that are searching
Speaker 4: and looking for something more. And there are others that
Speaker 4: aren't Christian and not interested, but looking for you know,
Speaker 4: positive and uplifting is the branding of course, and and
Speaker 4: that's what it is.
Speaker 3: So yeah, so it's really it's really good.
Speaker 4: They MJ listened to every single one of my podcast
Speaker 4: episodes before inviting me to become part of the Light family.
Speaker 4: As we say, so good thing that I kept it
Speaker 4: clean all along, or they wouldn't have probably want.
Speaker 3: To be on board.
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, they do do a good job. And like,
Speaker 1: I've worked in a bunch of radio stations. And what
Speaker 1: was interesting was I was working at SEN, which is
Speaker 1: obviously a commercial station at the same time, and the
Speaker 1: facilities and studios and resources at that time at light
Speaker 1: FM was significantly better than SEN. And light FM is
Speaker 1: a community station that is run like a commercial station
Speaker 1: in terms of like the way like their production, their
Speaker 1: facilities and resources. It's yeah, it's it's world class. It's
Speaker 1: run like I mean, I've worked at Gold FM. I've
Speaker 1: worked at a bunch of stations. It's literally just like
Speaker 1: working into a walking into a high level commercial station.
Speaker 1: So they must be doing something right. All right, let's
Speaker 1: head down the home straight. Where do people start in this?
Speaker 1: I mean, I know there's no three step plan, but
Speaker 1: maybe from both of you, this kind of idea of
Speaker 1: how do I, how do I better manage me? How
Speaker 1: do I better self regulate? TIF do you have any
Speaker 1: insights into this, like, how do I that idea of equanimity?
Speaker 1: How do I be the calm in the chaos, because
Speaker 1: there's always going to be chaos around us at times.
Speaker 1: None of us are going to be living in a
Speaker 1: cave on a mat, you know. So you moving forward?
Speaker 1: Do you have a plan now that you're back from
Speaker 1: this kind of somewhat philosophical spiritual experience or are you
Speaker 1: just going with the.
Speaker 3: Flow a little bit of both.
Speaker 2: Really, we spent one thing we spent a lot of
Speaker 2: time on there before hitting the mountain, which said a
Speaker 2: lot of intentions was workshopping our identity, our kind of
Speaker 2: I am statement, who am I? And what sound like
Speaker 2: wanky terms, but our mission and purpose. But when you
Speaker 2: actually sit down and really drill down on that, you
Speaker 2: learn a lot about yourself. And I just feel like
Speaker 2: the world is different to me now because I was
Speaker 2: experiencing it through this foggy lens of not really recognizing
Speaker 2: what values were driving me. And so when I, I
Speaker 2: should say, when I can recognize that now other people's
Speaker 2: actions or experiences or the people around me, I feel
Speaker 2: like I'm responding differently to the more I'm not responding
Speaker 2: to them because I'm just clear on what matters to
Speaker 2: me and I'm looking at that and not all the
Speaker 2: other stuff, if that makes sense.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's interesting. That's simple and somewhat wanky stuff, you know,
Speaker 2: to go, oh, we're going to go on, We're going
Speaker 2: to our mission and purpose, but it's like it it matters. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Well, also the idea of kind of stepping out
Speaker 1: of the unconsciousness of your life, you know, where like
Speaker 1: life happens anyway, right, I mean, life just goes on
Speaker 1: and then you look up and you go, oh fuck,
Speaker 1: and now I'm fifty shit shit, and it's it's and
Speaker 1: that's not really anybody's goal is to have that Oh fuck,
Speaker 1: I'm fifty and this wasn't my plan. Yeah, but is
Speaker 1: to start to whatever this means for the individual, live
Speaker 1: more alignce, live more consciously, genuinely even in the busyness,
Speaker 1: and mayhem, to be more aware you know, what about you, doc,
Speaker 1: what about you?
Speaker 4: Yeah? Very much aligned with what you were saying, Tiff.
Speaker 4: I've been that there's a concept in acceptance and commitment
Speaker 4: therapy called the choice point, and that.
Speaker 3: You know, multiple times, dozens of times during.
Speaker 4: The day, we've got this opportunity to consider whether or
Speaker 4: not something's taking us towards what's really important to us,
Speaker 4: our values, which is exactly what you were talking about
Speaker 4: tif or Away, And I am I've just got that
Speaker 4: awareness about the choice point kind of more top of
Speaker 4: mind at the moment. And so, like a small example,
Speaker 4: like I love chocolate, all right, I love it, and
Speaker 4: but I buy.
Speaker 3: A Fredo frog because there is an end to that.
Speaker 4: It's only like thirty five grams or something, so I
Speaker 4: can indulge, but I'm not eating a whole block of
Speaker 4: Cabri dairy milk.
Speaker 1: Do you know you're just talking to a version of you.
Speaker 2: You know you can get giant fretdo's too, and they
Speaker 2: taste better.
Speaker 4: Well, they're giant Frettos that I'm buying to, you know,
Speaker 4: Like they're the ones that I buy. But just for example,
Speaker 4: like yesterday they're on sale at Woollies, Like they're overpriced
Speaker 4: for what they are, but they were a dollar each.
Speaker 4: I'm like, I'm going to buy two, put one in
Speaker 4: the in the drawer, and when I ate one yesterday,
Speaker 4: I don't normally I usually have like one one a
Speaker 4: week or something, but I thought I want, oh, I
Speaker 4: want to eat that other fredo the minute I'd finished
Speaker 4: the first and then this choice point came into my mind.
Speaker 4: I'm like, no, well, I mean be cause I'm fifty,
Speaker 4: I'm on the other side of I mean, I'm through menopause.
Speaker 4: My I'm still crossfitting, but my body shape is changing,
Speaker 4: my body fat levels are higher than they've ever been,
Speaker 4: you know for me. And I'm conscious of these things,
Speaker 4: and i want my health, i want my strength, i
Speaker 4: want my vitality for the next fifty and so I'm like,
Speaker 4: choice point, Okay, towards are away. Okay, eating that second
Speaker 4: fretto is definitely away. If I was a party, If
Speaker 4: I was at a party, it would be towards. So
Speaker 4: context matters. But I'm keeping in mind this idea that
Speaker 4: you know, it's hard. It takes effort to do good
Speaker 4: by ourselves, it really does. And I'm trying to listen
Speaker 4: and then and then when that resistance comes up, because
Speaker 4: we will go to a concert tonight, we'll be home
Speaker 4: really late, I've got CrossFit booked in the morning. There
Speaker 4: will be resistance, but I will go because it's important.
Speaker 4: And so, yeah, this choice point is something that I'm
Speaker 4: I'm really keeping in mind. It's simple and it's quite powerful.
Speaker 4: We just have to listen when we get our answer.
Speaker 4: So but before just sorry, I'm so sorry to interruptive Craig.
Speaker 4: Before we finish our recording today. This is something that
Speaker 4: I just wanted to just quickly mention. So can we
Speaker 4: just make sure we save a little just a minute
Speaker 4: or two for something I just want to share towards
Speaker 4: the end.
Speaker 3: Sure, Okay, thanks, Sorry, Tiff, go go, That's all right.
Speaker 2: I was just going to say I wrote the first
Speaker 2: day I came back. I wrote on my whiteboard, which
Speaker 2: is in front of me. Now, will I do what's
Speaker 2: required today to be I want to be tomorrow? And
Speaker 2: then I've got I'll show you three post it notes.
Speaker 2: I've got one that just say will I. I've got
Speaker 2: one on my bathroom mirror, one on the inside of
Speaker 2: my front door that I see when I leave the house,
Speaker 2: and one on the fridge.
Speaker 3: And in my head all day.
Speaker 2: I'm like, will I will I will. I'm doing five
Speaker 2: minute meditations twice a day just to stop and pause.
Speaker 2: It's like, am I going to let my heart rate
Speaker 2: go back up thirteen beats a minute till it's usual?
Speaker 2: Or am I going to keep it to the thirteen
Speaker 2: beats a minute lower resting heart rate I had from
Speaker 2: being in India. Do you know, like it's so yeah,
Speaker 2: I found that a really a good practice for me.
Speaker 1: That's quite an amazing You know what I love about that?
Speaker 4: That?
Speaker 1: Well, I love about your new regime in the house
Speaker 1: and your post it notes, but I love that there
Speaker 1: is a measurable outcome. Like the thing with psychology and
Speaker 1: the motions and stuff, it's kind of hard to measure,
Speaker 1: right because it's you know, it's very subjective, but heart
Speaker 1: rate is not subjective. It's like it's a number. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's a number of beats in a minute. And I
Speaker 1: mean thirteen beats lower on average is a fucking lot.
Speaker 2: That is substantious lower than it's ever been. It's sitting.
Speaker 3: It wasn't back, and it.
Speaker 2: Wasn't it was it normally sits high fifties to low sixties,
Speaker 2: so probably fifty eight to sixty one. I got home
Speaker 2: and it's been sitting on it was forty seven, forty
Speaker 2: seven and those last few nights, I'm having a glass
Speaker 2: of wine with dinner. Now, if I have wine before
Speaker 2: bed would normally raise my heart rate overnight, So I'm
Speaker 2: doing all that, but what it tells me is that
Speaker 2: hole that's switching off, that presence and that social aspect
Speaker 2: to my life. And it's like, well, there's your answer.
Speaker 2: There's where you need to do the work.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 1: What's like almost ironic here is that you want to
Speaker 1: desperately hold on to that, but without the desperation. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because the desperation desperate, Yeah, the desperation will fuck.
Speaker 3: It up, right, Yeah, yeah, hold it lightly, Hold it lightly.
Speaker 1: It's been a really interesting chat you too, doctor Jodie.
Speaker 1: Before we go, you wanted to share something, so now
Speaker 1: would be then I wanted.
Speaker 4: To just in terms of what you were saying earlier
Speaker 4: about the lung transplant. Tiff and I had the joy
Speaker 4: of speaking at a VIC poll women's well being day
Speaker 4: and we also got to listen to somebody to speak
Speaker 4: about organ donation and I learned a lot and I
Speaker 4: thought this was this would be, you know, a nice
Speaker 4: opportunity to kind of just touch on that, to let
Speaker 4: people know that we can, we have to opt into
Speaker 4: organ donation, but our family members have the final say
Speaker 4: on the day that that question might be asked. And
Speaker 4: I learned this incredible. I won't know, I won't recall
Speaker 4: the numbers. Maybe tif we'll remember more clearly. But for
Speaker 4: your organs to be donated, you need to die in
Speaker 4: hospital in the intensive care unit, where you're breathing and
Speaker 4: your heart are already kind of really being supported. And
Speaker 4: because the circumstances under which organs can be donated is
Speaker 4: so specific, out of tens of thousands of people who
Speaker 4: said yes to it, only about fifteen hundred people can
Speaker 4: donate organs in the end, at the end of the
Speaker 4: day because of that, and there are people's lives who
Speaker 4: are just absolutely changed and transformed as a result. So
Speaker 4: I thought, yeah, since you mentioned it earlier, I thought, probably,
Speaker 4: you know, not something we like.
Speaker 3: To think about.
Speaker 4: But we're all, you know, walking each other home, as
Speaker 4: my guest said this morning on in our conversation, and
Speaker 4: the day will come for all of us, and I
Speaker 4: think it's important for us to all think about and
Speaker 4: let our family know what our wants are, what our
Speaker 4: desires are around that wow.
Speaker 2: And know what our families and see it as a legacy.
Speaker 2: I remember when we listened to John speak on that
Speaker 2: the legacy of him being able to gift that life
Speaker 2: to people has given him something that helps with the
Speaker 2: grief of what he lost.
Speaker 4: You're exactly right because you interviewed him, didn't you, Tiff,
Speaker 4: So you're exactly right because it was with his wife,
Speaker 4: wasn't it that he said, yes, and I think her
Speaker 4: kidney went to a little boy.
Speaker 3: And I'm going to get all.
Speaker 4: Choked up, but yeah, it's very personal, it's very difficult.
Speaker 4: But yeah, we should let our families know because at
Speaker 4: the end of the day, they are the ones that
Speaker 4: get the final say.
Speaker 3: Even if we've registered and ticked all the boxes, it's
Speaker 3: up to them.
Speaker 4: So yeah, so thank thanks Harps for the chance to
Speaker 4: just raise that here.
Speaker 3: I must do it on my own podcast as well.
Speaker 1: It's important, pleasure, it's a great message. I saw a
Speaker 1: video the other day on when I shouldn't have been
Speaker 1: scrolling but fuck it, And there was this dad. He
Speaker 1: was probably my age, maybe a bit younger, and his
Speaker 1: son had passed away. His son was in his twenties
Speaker 1: and then he meant went and met the recipient who
Speaker 1: had gotten his son's heart. Oh my god. And they
Speaker 1: that organized this get together and they put a stethoscope
Speaker 1: on the dad so he could listen to the son's heart. Wow. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that was it. That was it. I was out. I'm like, fuck,
Speaker 1: why did I It's like, you know those things that
Speaker 1: are beautiful. It's like I'm glad I'm watching this, but
Speaker 1: now I'm fucked for the next three minutes. Yeah anyway, Yeah,
Speaker 1: Dr Jody, How do people find you? What's your show called?
Speaker 1: Where can they connect with you? What's your web address?
Speaker 1: Sell us a book or two? Ready set, no pressure, go.
Speaker 4: Just if you go to my website. Dr Jodi Richson
Speaker 4: dot com dot au Jody with an eye. But I
Speaker 4: love how you say the name of my podcast halps,
Speaker 4: go for it.
Speaker 3: You know what to do?
Speaker 2: Well?
Speaker 1: Her podcast is called well Hello Anxiety. You need to
Speaker 1: use me. You need to use me in your PRIMI
Speaker 1: I do, I.
Speaker 3: Do, I do.
Speaker 4: I've got lots of ideas about some updates. So yeah,
Speaker 4: I'll keep that in mind.
Speaker 1: Well, we appreciate you, Tiff. Keep riding that bloody zen
Speaker 1: train without the anxiety. Don't hold on to it desperately,
Speaker 1: hold on to it lightly. Just between your your pinky
Speaker 1: finger and whatever the one next to it's called maybe
Speaker 1: your pinky finger and your thumb. Yeah, just that, yeah,
Speaker 1: like that? Like that? Perfect?
Speaker 2: All right?
Speaker 1: Everyone, love your guts. Thank you, Thanks Tiff, Thanks Jody,
Speaker 1: Thanks guys.
Speaker 3: Bye,