Speaker 1: Apod Shake Production. Welcome back to another episode about I
Speaker 1: Bad Mom Podcast. We have days where we are literally
Speaker 1: tearing our hair out. I feel like I'm going grayer
Speaker 1: by the moment.
Speaker 2: Before we even walked into this room. Yeah, we're just
Speaker 2: like hard on the text, Like you're just getting peppered
Speaker 2: by your daughter's right now.
Speaker 1: I went for a beautiful walk this morning, four kilometers
Speaker 1: in nature. Listen to Mel Robbins podcast. You know, like
Speaker 1: I did all.
Speaker 3: The things this morning, all of them.
Speaker 1: And I get into work and I'm super stress because
Speaker 1: I've just got text stuff to text from my children.
Speaker 1: They had a really late night two days ago, and
Speaker 1: I reminded them when they had the late night, if
Speaker 1: kindness and rudeness tomorrow, I'm gonna know that you can't
Speaker 1: handle late nights. So they were deliberately delightful yesterday, but
Speaker 1: I know that today today is the reaper. Today is today.
Speaker 1: I'm not thinking about the fact that it was a
Speaker 1: well I am late night. Yeah, they're thinking I'm not thinking,
Speaker 1: and so we don't know anything. They're related.
Speaker 3: You don't know anything.
Speaker 2: Remember, Am I a bad mum for faking being asleep?
Speaker 2: This is just a fun one and it's just going
Speaker 2: to be fun and like harder. But it's like we
Speaker 2: sell this podcast, right, it's being reflective fun but sometimes
Speaker 2: shit behavior from us, but at the same time like
Speaker 2: we own it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think your routine tends to happen on a
Speaker 3: Monday night only.
Speaker 2: Whereas you're like, I'm in buy what time is your
Speaker 2: bed on a Monday night?
Speaker 1: Like, well, I could easily go to bed at eight,
Speaker 1: but I've got kids that are.
Speaker 2: Up, and I'm like, can you please be quiet? Yeah,
Speaker 2: I can go to sleep. Yeah, but your Monday nights
Speaker 2: are very routine. You catch up from your weekends on
Speaker 2: your Monday night, right, so you know that you're in
Speaker 2: bed early Monday night. If I could do that every night,
Speaker 2: Katie by eight o'clock, I would.
Speaker 3: Be one happy mama.
Speaker 1: But what I noticed about you, though, is when I
Speaker 1: text you in the evenings. Yeah, you've always got your
Speaker 1: phone notifications on silent yea quite early on, so that
Speaker 1: the intent is there.
Speaker 3: It's definitely on, but I will reply.
Speaker 2: I mean, okay, it's just when she picked their phone
Speaker 2: up to look.
Speaker 3: I wish that I could put that.
Speaker 2: Same silencing messages on my kids, or maybe on my forehead.
Speaker 2: That would be wonderful that night because I get to,
Speaker 2: like I've said this many times on this podcast, I
Speaker 2: get to like eight, let's eight thirty, and my quota
Speaker 2: of patience is like it's done, Like it's shot. I
Speaker 2: need to work on this, right, Like this is serious stuff.
Speaker 2: I gotta work on this. I just have nothing left
Speaker 2: in the tank because I've probably been up since like
Speaker 2: four point thirty train, done all that, and you're like give, give, give, give, give,
Speaker 2: run around, run, do everything all day, and then eight
Speaker 2: thirty comes and I'm like, I've got nothing left. And
Speaker 2: then I go to bed feeling like a shit mum
Speaker 2: because I haven't had enough patience or energy to just
Speaker 2: sit with them and be present when they going to
Speaker 2: bed and just listen to them and do all.
Speaker 1: That's a hard one and I found this last night.
Speaker 1: So I left work late. I say late. I left
Speaker 1: work at like six, and then I went to the gym,
Speaker 1: but I hadn't done any exercise, and so I was like,
Speaker 1: go to the gym, just do half an hour of.
Speaker 3: Wait just yep.
Speaker 1: And so then by the time I got home it
Speaker 1: was after seven, and then I just wanted to relax,
Speaker 1: have a shower, and they just kept talking. And the
Speaker 1: thing is, there's a part of me that's like, stop talking,
Speaker 1: trying to have a shower, And then the other part
Speaker 1: of me is like, you haven't spent.
Speaker 3: Any time with them today at all.
Speaker 1: You've been away all day, they've been at school all day,
Speaker 1: You've got home late, and you literally don't have the
Speaker 1: patience to listen to what your kids want to talk
Speaker 1: to you about for like half an hour.
Speaker 3: Yeah that does make you feel.
Speaker 2: Like so shit, Yeah it does, because like there's little moments, say,
Speaker 2: for instance, like when I'm in the car driving them everywhere,
Speaker 2: that I'll talk to them and go like ask them
Speaker 2: the questions and then maybe at that point they won't
Speaker 2: feel like talking to me. Like Elsie goes, I said, oh,
Speaker 2: what are you looking at out of the window because
Speaker 2: we were coming home from netball? That's right, And then
Speaker 2: she's looking out it's just on that sort of like
Speaker 2: getting dark right that day, she I'm just looking at
Speaker 2: the stars.
Speaker 1: She's like, shush, shush.
Speaker 3: If I could tell you to shush. When I felt like,
Speaker 3: how about you drive the car and I'll look at the.
Speaker 2: Fucking stars, I was like, I don't feel like shushing, right, now,
Speaker 2: But then I flip it.
Speaker 3: I go, like at nighttime when they're like.
Speaker 2: Mom, please sit with me for like just a couple
Speaker 2: of minutes, and I feel myself going, I can't.
Speaker 1: I'm looking at the star.
Speaker 3: In the back of my eyelids.
Speaker 2: Anyway, fast forward to a few times now, and the
Speaker 2: reason why I'm saying it is I've done it more
Speaker 2: than once, which is why I'm raising it with you,
Speaker 2: is have you ever, as a parent, pretended that you're asleep,
Speaker 2: like actually faked that you're asleep when your child's at
Speaker 2: the bed. I can't hear you, I'm really asleep when
Speaker 2: you're not asleep, and you can hear them like they're
Speaker 2: not dying, they're not dead, they're not sick.
Speaker 3: It's probably just for a cup of water.
Speaker 2: You can tell the tone of your own kids, right,
Speaker 2: These are the times where I've faked it, fake it
Speaker 2: till you make it, and I have faked it to
Speaker 2: go just gonna lay here and it's in the darken
Speaker 2: if I lay here really still and I'm really really
Speaker 2: really really still, and don't butt it, like, don't batter
Speaker 2: your eyelids, don't move, they might go away.
Speaker 1: They might have to sap they don't need a glass
Speaker 1: of water anymore.
Speaker 3: They might walk past the tap and just get their
Speaker 3: own glass of water.
Speaker 2: I've done it more than once, Katie, and I feel
Speaker 2: shit because I've yeah, I've faked it quite a few times.
Speaker 1: Really, did they go and pull their own glass of water? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Yeah, Look, I've done it more than three times, but
Speaker 2: let's just use three as the roundup.
Speaker 3: Okay.
Speaker 2: The last one, which was very relevant, she called me
Speaker 2: out on it and she was like, mom, she's mom.
Speaker 2: I went and you know how you just feel yourself
Speaker 2: gope like you and she goes, I know you're not asleep,
Speaker 2: and I was like, oh, I'm not asleep. This is
Speaker 2: the difference of age, Katie. They're older now they can
Speaker 2: call you out and call the bluff on it.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: But also it's like, well, okay, I'm not asleep, but
Speaker 1: I don't want to get up. I don't want to
Speaker 1: get up.
Speaker 2: But by that stage, bab I was lulling so hard
Speaker 2: at myself faking being asleep and then having her call
Speaker 2: me out and go, you're not even to sleep, And.
Speaker 3: I was like, I am not. I am not asleep,
Speaker 3: But I was like, but I don't want to get up.
Speaker 1: Do you have those moments where you're like, what do
Speaker 1: you need? What do you need from me? I am
Speaker 1: trying to sleep, what.
Speaker 3: Do you need?
Speaker 2: I think this is the difference of like ages, right,
Speaker 2: is that back in the day, when that little bit
Speaker 2: like smaller, maybe like let's just say five, and they
Speaker 2: end up at your bedside, you know that they're there.
Speaker 2: You can hear them, you can see them, you can
Speaker 2: feel them that you're waiting for somebody else that could
Speaker 2: possibly be laying next to you to jump in so
Speaker 2: that you don't you know, you don't wake up. They
Speaker 2: were years ago, right nowadays most cases will be.
Speaker 3: I'll get back up.
Speaker 2: I'll probably moan and groan about it and tell you
Speaker 2: that you don't need a glass of water.
Speaker 3: You're just faking it.
Speaker 2: I mean they've learnt from the best, because clearly I
Speaker 2: do it as well.
Speaker 3: But yeah, I just think I've done it more than once.
Speaker 2: And I kind of caught myself out as well as
Speaker 2: being caught out because we were both ended up in
Speaker 2: a fit of laughter. But at the same time, I
Speaker 2: just was like, Rachel got I need to swap up
Speaker 2: my game. It's not working. I can't like I just
Speaker 2: have to own it and just I'm not getting out
Speaker 2: of bed. What do you want from me? But the
Speaker 2: thing with my girls, just to wrap this up, is
Speaker 2: they're all good. But then Katie, they get to that
Speaker 2: where I sleep and where they sleep is quite what
Speaker 2: you see, like there's quite a distance. And then when
Speaker 2: the house is black, pitch black, they're like, no, I'm
Speaker 2: not walking back to my room by myself. And yeah,
Speaker 2: but you walk down here, Yeah, you walk down here
Speaker 2: to do this, to create this, and no, you can't
Speaker 2: walk back. Need to change up my game. So if
Speaker 2: you've got any ideas, yeah I do. Actually I've got
Speaker 2: an idea.
Speaker 1: And the idea is to make your kids really scared
Speaker 1: of waking you up, because I did that too, and
Speaker 1: my girls got to the point where they would say,
Speaker 1: don't wake mom up, She'll be so mad, wake dad up.
Speaker 1: And I would then have nights where the girls would
Speaker 1: come in and I would do the same as you.
Speaker 1: I would pretend to be asleep. I hear them come in,
Speaker 1: I've heard it. I've heard them go around and wake
Speaker 1: day up, and I will lay there and pretend to
Speaker 1: be asleep. Fucking mislike. I don't even know how it
Speaker 1: came about. But they then saw me as this like monster, like,
Speaker 1: don't wake the monster in the middle of the night.
Speaker 2: I also have had that a few times, and again
Speaker 2: that's off the back of me just not having Obviously,
Speaker 2: my patience barrier is very slim to none during a
Speaker 2: certain window where I just get to the point where
Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm exhausted. I can't give to any of you,
Speaker 2: not single ioda.
Speaker 1: I remember one time, Rachel, and I'm sure I've told
Speaker 1: you about this, but Holly came in in the middle
Speaker 1: of the night and I was so done, like I'd
Speaker 1: been woken up a few times. I was just like
Speaker 1: I turned around and I went and she looked at
Speaker 1: me all like innocently. I started getting a bit teary,
Speaker 1: and she said.
Speaker 3: My tooth came out.
Speaker 1: Oh I am a shit mom,