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Speaker 1: This is the Fits In with Kate Richie podcast.

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Speaker 2: The weekend is on its way. Maybe this weekend is

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Speaker 2: the weekend where you have to meet the parents and

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Speaker 2: that's a really big deal and you're feeling a bit nervous.

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Speaker 2: Maybe dinner is on tonight.

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Speaker 3: Can also be a very early make it or break it, absolutely,

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Speaker 3: but even the invitation is the make it or break

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Speaker 3: a point where it might be an early stage of

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Speaker 3: a relationship and they say, oh, why don't you come

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Speaker 3: and meet mum and dad at a barbecue on Sunday?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it does make things very official, does.

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Speaker 4: And you go, oh, you know what, I don't think

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Speaker 4: we're there, do you know? Like I was always very

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Speaker 4: confident back in the day.

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Speaker 5: Meeting your parents, Yeah, you know, and we're just cracking

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Speaker 5: a joke or a little bit of humor. The other

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Speaker 5: one for me was always if you could find out

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Speaker 5: if the father was into a football team.

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Speaker 2: And then you can bomb thirteen twenty four ten if

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Speaker 2: you've had an awful experience when you've met the family.

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Speaker 2: But you're right, the invitation itself kind of reed presents

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Speaker 2: something and then you hope that it's going to go okay.

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Speaker 1: That's what this.

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Speaker 2: Story is about because this man has come up against

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Speaker 2: it online because he has posted about the fact that

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Speaker 2: the girlfriend is going to meet the family, and ahead

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Speaker 2: of meeting the family, he has decided to enroll her

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Speaker 2: in an etiquette an online etiquette course. So in some ways,

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Speaker 2: the like he's done the inviting, so you think, oh,

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Speaker 2: this is good, this is like a step in the

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Speaker 2: right direction. But the clanger is before you meet the family,

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Speaker 2: you actually have to do the etiquette course, and it's awful.

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Speaker 2: He's he's been absolutely blasted a friend. No, But what

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Speaker 2: he's saying is that he wants it's a big deal.

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Speaker 2: He likes her, but he needs her to make a

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Speaker 2: good impression because he wants her to hang out.

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Speaker 1: He wants her to hang around.

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Speaker 2: So in his eyes, he thinks it's a comp it's

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Speaker 2: a comment.

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Speaker 1: Otherwise he just feed her to the lines, and so.

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Speaker 4: He's protecting her from his family.

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Speaker 1: Well that's his excuse.

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Speaker 2: This is what he's saying. I'm blessed and I had

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Speaker 2: a fortunate upbringing. My girlfriend, on the other hand, faced

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Speaker 2: some challenges in her life from a young age, particularly

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Speaker 2: financial challenges. She's a beautiful, interesting person. Despite all the hardships,

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Speaker 2: she faced. The only problem is, and here we go,

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Speaker 2: is that she lacks the manners that my family typically

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Speaker 2: expects from someone I'm in a relation.

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Speaker 4: She run run.

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Speaker 2: My girlfriend is the less is the first. This is

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Speaker 2: in brackets. My girlfriend is the first less fortunate woman

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Speaker 2: that I've dated, And for that reason I made the effort.

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Speaker 1: To prepare for her first dinner with my family.

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Speaker 4: Do you know what I mean? The family obviously has

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Speaker 4: a lot of power over.

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Speaker 1: Him, and so it's a big deal for him. So

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Speaker 1: she's she's going out with a peasant? Is your Is

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Speaker 1: you easy?

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Speaker 4: Hang on a minute.

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Speaker 1: I know it sounds a bit like that, doesn't it.

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Speaker 3: It's we spoke about this the other day, k Richie

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Speaker 3: that if you were to you know, when you see

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Speaker 3: somebody at a restaurant and the way they're holding their cutlery,

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Speaker 3: and you.

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Speaker 4: Go, oh my god, won't.

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Speaker 1: Make them a bad persse.

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Speaker 4: It's not a stick just to stab a steak with.

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Speaker 4: That's not how you hold a forte.

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Speaker 1: When people hold it like a pencil.

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Speaker 4: You don't do that.

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Speaker 5: But you don't judge a person by that, mate, you do.

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Speaker 2: I think people, a lot of people, A lot of

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Speaker 2: people do, and I do think that if you're introducing

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Speaker 2: your partner to your family and you know that, say

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Speaker 2: mom is going to go, oh god, they can't even

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Speaker 2: hold their cutlery. And if your mum has great influence

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Speaker 2: on your life, you you might just say, hey, at

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Speaker 2: the end of the meal, can you.

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Speaker 1: Put your culory back together? Because it's going to be

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Speaker 1: a big lot in our family.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I'll give me a break.

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Speaker 5: Could you imagine you're not falling in love with that

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Speaker 5: person because you're falling in love with otherwise that's a

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Speaker 5: level of elitism that gets me.

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Speaker 2: It is, No, it's not, but it's just I know,

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Speaker 2: but I know what you're saying fits and it shouldn't

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Speaker 2: be like that, but it is.

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Speaker 3: Do you know My sister brought home a guy one time.

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Speaker 3: He came for dinner on a Sunday night to the

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Speaker 3: family table and I'm sharing too much of your time

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Speaker 3: and I'm going to be shot down by you and

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Speaker 3: my family, but I'm going to course with you up

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Speaker 3: to But he he came and told us about how

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Speaker 3: he was circumcised as a child, and they buried it

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Speaker 3: in the.

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Speaker 4: Backyard, of course, with nothing to do with it with.

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Speaker 3: Manners, because that is an inappropriate topic for the table

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Speaker 3: on the first end of the relationship by judgement death

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Speaker 3: by judgment of family.

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Speaker 1: I agree because.

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Speaker 2: It doesn't matter because because I think if you if

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Speaker 2: your family has a lot of influence over you, and

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Speaker 2: I'm not saying that's at like a great thing, but

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Speaker 2: it does. It's going to make your life a hell

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Speaker 2: of a lot easier if you choose a partner that

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Speaker 2: they approve.

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Speaker 5: You know what, you know what he's he's on a

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Speaker 5: very fine edge here of losing his relationship with her

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Speaker 5: because he's basically saying, this is what you have to

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Speaker 5: deal with if you want to be with me, absolutely.

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Speaker 2: And what she's feeling is she has said, you're embarrassed

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Speaker 2: with me. So that's not a good way to start.

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Speaker 3: I came around to your place right as the new

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Speaker 3: as the new partner, and I go around for dinner

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Speaker 3: with it.

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Speaker 1: I have to imagine you've been my boyfriend.

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Speaker 3: And then I turn up for dinner to meet Heather

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Speaker 3: for the first time and I'm wearing moccasins. That's fine,

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Speaker 3: it's not Heather would be happy with me relationship over.

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Speaker 2: I do think she would notice your table manners, though,

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Speaker 2: would she see what as do I because I am

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Speaker 2: my mother's daughter.

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Speaker 5: Every child is taught differently how to use a knife

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Speaker 5: and form, and.

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Speaker 1: Some aren't taught.

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Speaker 2: I met someone a very long time ago, and you

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Speaker 2: kind of can't blame people for not being taught.

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Speaker 1: Of course not, it's not their fault.

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Speaker 4: But look around.

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Speaker 5: That knife and fork has one function in life, and

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Speaker 5: that is to cut the steak that's in front of it.

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Speaker 1: Right, people do it differently.

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Speaker 4: You've got to get out.

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Speaker 5: Of your head, mister Whippley, that if someone does it differently,

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Speaker 5: that it's still okay.

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Speaker 1: It's still the function.

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Speaker 2: Is to cut that piece of steak, no matter how

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Speaker 2: you cut it. Is that what you're saying, there is

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Speaker 2: a level of social etiquettes.

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Speaker 3: There is social etiquas exists for a reason so that

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Speaker 3: everybody can get on well in a community. Sits In

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Speaker 3: Whipper with Kate Ritchie is a Nova podcast talk great

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Speaker 3: shows like this. Download the Nova player, find the app

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Speaker 3: store or Google playing the over player