1 00:00:05,800 --> 00:00:09,240 Speaker 1: Have everyone. It's Carly Taylor here for this week's Mojo Monday. 2 00:00:09,880 --> 00:00:12,800 Speaker 1: So I'm going to start with a story today, and 3 00:00:12,960 --> 00:00:16,040 Speaker 1: you may have heard it before, but even if you have, 4 00:00:16,200 --> 00:00:19,400 Speaker 1: try and listen to the message behind it. So here 5 00:00:19,440 --> 00:00:23,680 Speaker 1: it goes. There once was a Chinese farmer and one 6 00:00:23,760 --> 00:00:27,520 Speaker 1: day his horse ran away, and all the neighbors came 7 00:00:27,560 --> 00:00:31,040 Speaker 1: by and said, oh, that's such bad luck, and the 8 00:00:31,080 --> 00:00:37,920 Speaker 1: farmer replied maybe. The next day the horse returned, bringing 9 00:00:37,920 --> 00:00:41,160 Speaker 1: with it several wild horses, and all the neighbors came 10 00:00:41,200 --> 00:00:44,680 Speaker 1: back and they said, oh, that's such good luck, and 11 00:00:44,720 --> 00:00:49,199 Speaker 1: the farmer said, yeah, maybe. And the following day his 12 00:00:49,400 --> 00:00:52,519 Speaker 1: son tried to tame one of the wild horses. So 13 00:00:52,560 --> 00:00:54,600 Speaker 1: he went for a ride and he was thrown off 14 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:58,280 Speaker 1: and he broke his legs, and the neighbors came around 15 00:00:58,280 --> 00:01:01,400 Speaker 1: and said, oh, that's such bad luck luck, and the 16 00:01:01,400 --> 00:01:07,000 Speaker 1: farmer replied maybe. Then a week later a war broke 17 00:01:07,040 --> 00:01:11,000 Speaker 1: out and the army came through the village conscripting all 18 00:01:11,040 --> 00:01:14,000 Speaker 1: the young men for war. That his son, who had 19 00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:17,760 Speaker 1: the broken legs, was left behind. And the neighbor said, oh, 20 00:01:17,840 --> 00:01:21,800 Speaker 1: that is such good luck. And the farmer replied maybe, 21 00:01:23,480 --> 00:01:27,000 Speaker 1: And I love this story because what it does is 22 00:01:27,040 --> 00:01:32,360 Speaker 1: it highlights and challenges something that we all do. We 23 00:01:32,400 --> 00:01:37,160 Speaker 1: really rush, without realizing it, to label our experiences as 24 00:01:37,280 --> 00:01:40,000 Speaker 1: good or bad or this shouldn't be happening to me, 25 00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:43,959 Speaker 1: or this is amazing or this is terrible. And the 26 00:01:44,040 --> 00:01:49,280 Speaker 1: moment we label something, we often attach the whole story 27 00:01:49,360 --> 00:01:53,440 Speaker 1: to it. So it's like we predict what the future 28 00:01:53,520 --> 00:01:55,840 Speaker 1: is going to bring, or we decide what it means 29 00:01:55,920 --> 00:01:59,880 Speaker 1: about us and our lives, or we react as if 30 00:02:00,080 --> 00:02:02,600 Speaker 1: we already know how it's all going to turn out. 31 00:02:03,480 --> 00:02:08,360 Speaker 1: But the truth is, we don't. That situation that you're 32 00:02:08,600 --> 00:02:12,200 Speaker 1: frustrated or upset or hurt or embarrassed about right now, 33 00:02:12,880 --> 00:02:17,679 Speaker 1: it's probably not the full story. And equally, the thing 34 00:02:17,760 --> 00:02:21,680 Speaker 1: that you're clinging to, like the outcome you're desperate to 35 00:02:21,720 --> 00:02:25,040 Speaker 1: hold on to, that might not turn out the way 36 00:02:25,080 --> 00:02:28,560 Speaker 1: you expect it either, because life is far less linear 37 00:02:28,680 --> 00:02:31,400 Speaker 1: than we like to believe. Our lives don't move in 38 00:02:31,440 --> 00:02:34,720 Speaker 1: a straight line. It's like navigating a ship. You know, 39 00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:38,040 Speaker 1: ship doesn't get from A to B in a straight line. 40 00:02:38,080 --> 00:02:41,720 Speaker 1: It's more like a zigzag. And sometimes things are calm 41 00:02:42,040 --> 00:02:47,200 Speaker 1: and sometimes they're rough, and sometimes unexpected things happen, and 42 00:02:47,280 --> 00:02:50,960 Speaker 1: from a psychological perspective, this links closely to what we 43 00:02:51,080 --> 00:02:54,919 Speaker 1: call cognitive fusion, when we get hooked by our thoughts 44 00:02:55,320 --> 00:02:57,799 Speaker 1: and we treat them as facts. This is bad, this 45 00:02:57,880 --> 00:03:02,280 Speaker 1: is unfair, This means something's gone wrong, and from that 46 00:03:02,440 --> 00:03:08,160 Speaker 1: place we react quickly and often emotionally. But the question 47 00:03:08,400 --> 00:03:13,799 Speaker 1: is what is the truth here, because we actually don't know. Yes, 48 00:03:13,880 --> 00:03:17,520 Speaker 1: there are facts about what's happening, but we don't know 49 00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:20,960 Speaker 1: how anything is really going to play out. But we 50 00:03:21,040 --> 00:03:23,520 Speaker 1: act like we think we do, and we talk in 51 00:03:23,600 --> 00:03:28,520 Speaker 1: these absolutes. So what the farmer shows us is something 52 00:03:28,720 --> 00:03:34,760 Speaker 1: very different, a pause, a space between the event and 53 00:03:34,800 --> 00:03:39,080 Speaker 1: then the meaning that we give it. So maybe it's 54 00:03:39,120 --> 00:03:45,720 Speaker 1: not passive or indifferent. It's actually open. So it doesn't 55 00:03:45,760 --> 00:03:48,680 Speaker 1: mean that you won't feel hurt or frustrated or disappointed 56 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:52,400 Speaker 1: or excited, because of course you will. But it's about 57 00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:57,800 Speaker 1: holding these feelings a little more lightly. It's about recognizing 58 00:03:57,840 --> 00:04:02,160 Speaker 1: that your first interpretation is not always the final one. 59 00:04:03,600 --> 00:04:07,840 Speaker 1: So this week I invite you to try something really simple. 60 00:04:08,480 --> 00:04:11,920 Speaker 1: The next time something happens and you feel yourself jumping 61 00:04:12,040 --> 00:04:17,200 Speaker 1: to a conclusion or labeling the experience like it's a disaster. 62 00:04:18,279 --> 00:04:22,920 Speaker 1: Just notice that reaction and then pause and quietly say 63 00:04:22,960 --> 00:04:28,640 Speaker 1: to yourself, maybe maybe this is bad, maybe this is good, 64 00:04:28,839 --> 00:04:32,640 Speaker 1: or maybe it's too early to tell. Because when you 65 00:04:32,680 --> 00:04:37,040 Speaker 1: stop trying to control the narrative too quickly, you give 66 00:04:37,120 --> 00:04:41,760 Speaker 1: yourself something far more useful. You give yourself perspective and 67 00:04:41,880 --> 00:04:47,680 Speaker 1: flexibility and the ability to respond rather than react, and 68 00:04:47,720 --> 00:04:50,440 Speaker 1: that could make a huge difference to what you do next. 69 00:04:51,440 --> 00:04:53,920 Speaker 1: So have a great week everyone, and I'll catch you 70 00:04:53,960 --> 00:05:04,440 Speaker 1: next week. Thea