WEBVTT - She Didn't Know It Yet...

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<v Speaker 1>Hey, friends, it's podcast time. It's all wouldn't tell it's

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<v Speaker 1>Malam Montt Things with Jonas today a little If it

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<v Speaker 1>is Malan Monte, thanks for listening in hope you're wow

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<v Speaker 1>whatever you're up to?

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<v Speaker 2>Wait? My fact?

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<v Speaker 1>Your fact? Oh my god? Wait, I've decided that every

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<v Speaker 1>because Mail always has ridiculous fucking facts and stories in

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<v Speaker 1>her head. We start every podcast with the fact, and

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<v Speaker 1>I reckon half the time we forget Yes, what do

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<v Speaker 1>you got? Okay?

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<v Speaker 2>Do you know that it is impossible for you to

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<v Speaker 2>dream of a face that you've never seen before?

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<v Speaker 1>Ah?

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<v Speaker 2>My daughter told me this and I was like, okay,

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<v Speaker 2>what you saw that on? You know, like some stupid clip?

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<v Speaker 2>I looked it up. It's even if it's the case

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<v Speaker 2>of you're looking through a friend's Facebook post and there's

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<v Speaker 2>a drive, her cousin or whatever, you can only dream

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<v Speaker 2>about someone who's face you have seen before.

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<v Speaker 1>It's not fascinating. That's fascinating because I feel like the

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<v Speaker 1>dreams that I can remember there have been people in

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<v Speaker 1>it that I haven't known, but I must have subconsciously

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<v Speaker 1>seen them before.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, how's the heartache of having to listen to someone's

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<v Speaker 2>fuck my my son does it all the time. He

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<v Speaker 2>had a dream last night. He's like me, like, I

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<v Speaker 2>dream all the time, and I reckon at them. I'll

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<v Speaker 2>stop him, and I'm like, I don't. I'm sorry. I

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<v Speaker 2>don't want to hear it. I can't hear it.

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<v Speaker 1>There is nothing more painful than somebody telling you about

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<v Speaker 1>their dream. The only thing that comes on part is

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<v Speaker 1>somebody making you sit through their holiday photos.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, all renovations.

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<v Speaker 1>This is when we knocked out the walls. I love

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<v Speaker 1>a reno. I mean, I'm all there for a reno.

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<v Speaker 1>Don't show me mid just show me before and after

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<v Speaker 1>a lot before.

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<v Speaker 2>Bro, But they want to tell you about and then

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<v Speaker 2>getting the plaster or it was really hard. We've got

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<v Speaker 2>a great guy to recommend if.

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<v Speaker 1>You like, don't show me your plans. Cannot visualize house

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<v Speaker 1>plans when they're just on the draftsman's done. I cannot

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<v Speaker 1>look at your plans and visualize that, so do not

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<v Speaker 1>show me it. Yep, good friend, totally pretend we're interested

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<v Speaker 1>in my head. If only they could hear my internal thoughts.

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<v Speaker 1>How cutes is so? My ten year old's got a girlfriend? No,

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<v Speaker 1>you know what?

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<v Speaker 2>This is unsurprising to me. This is unsurprising to me

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<v Speaker 2>with Arlow. All three of your kids are magnificent. I

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<v Speaker 2>have a very soft spot. He's my favorite.

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<v Speaker 1>He's pretty funny.

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<v Speaker 2>He's funny, and I can see him picking her a

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<v Speaker 2>flower and giving it to her and yeah, one hundred percent.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, he's a real space get it, Arlo, Like before

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<v Speaker 1>I get into the girlfriend. So a while ago, on

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<v Speaker 1>the holidays, we're driving and I said to him, my

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<v Speaker 1>sister is going to take him to Movie World with

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<v Speaker 1>a friend. And I said, what friend do you want

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<v Speaker 1>to take? He's like, I want to take Bobby. I said, okay,

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<v Speaker 1>well I'll this is in the middle of the holidays.

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<v Speaker 1>I said, okay, I'll call Bobby's and he said that's

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<v Speaker 1>all right, I'll just ask him at school. And I said, oh,

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<v Speaker 1>but you won't see him in time. I'll just call

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<v Speaker 1>his mom. He said, no, no, I'll just ask him

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<v Speaker 1>at school. I said, alo, you're in the middle of

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<v Speaker 1>school holidays.

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<v Speaker 2>You go am.

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't even though he was on school.

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<v Speaker 2>Holdays, I mean, I get it, I get it.

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<v Speaker 1>I just really ran off the road. I was like,

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<v Speaker 1>are you joking me? You've been on school holidays literally

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<v Speaker 1>a week. You haven't been at school.

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<v Speaker 2>Fuck, that's funny, but I relate to it. I get it,

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<v Speaker 2>like how many times I take medication? And then I'm like,

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<v Speaker 2>did I just have my tablet?

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<v Speaker 1>Yes? Well I have to have miney days of the

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<v Speaker 1>week or I never ever remember it ever. But anyway, Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>so he's got this little girlfriend and he didn't tell

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<v Speaker 1>me for a while. One of the other mom said, oh,

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<v Speaker 1>so Ali's got a girlfriend. I'm like, no, eight, And

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<v Speaker 1>then one day he's like, Mum, I've got a girlfriend.

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<v Speaker 1>He said, it's a birthday. Can I get us some

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<v Speaker 1>Ferrero rochares?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh my god? Are ferrero his favorite? Does he love them?

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<v Speaker 1>It was a ferrero O share, but I think still

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<v Speaker 1>to a kid, it's a fancy chocolate. Yeah it is.

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<v Speaker 1>Isn't that so cute? So anyway, we also had to

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<v Speaker 1>go to sports Girl and get her initial on a necklace,

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<v Speaker 1>but also his initial, and so she's wearing his and

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<v Speaker 1>he's wearing hers.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you know what it is about those little first

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<v Speaker 2>boyfriend and girlfriend. It's just that I.

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<v Speaker 1>Like you, Oh my god, I know, But also the

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<v Speaker 1>braveness of it, because they would have got teased. But

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<v Speaker 1>his best mate or one of his good mates has

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<v Speaker 1>also got a girlfriend, so the four of them are

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<v Speaker 1>kind of together. But I keep going, you know, how

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<v Speaker 1>is she? And he goes, I don't know. I'm like, well,

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<v Speaker 1>do you not even ask her how she is? I said,

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<v Speaker 1>how do you hang out? He said, well, before the

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<v Speaker 1>belt goes, we steal each other's hats. Oh god, it's so.

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<v Speaker 2>It's so cute, and they probably sort of in their groups,

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<v Speaker 2>but like looking over each.

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<v Speaker 1>Those I so remember I used to have crushes on

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<v Speaker 1>boys all the time, but I wouldn't have had the

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<v Speaker 1>confidence to say, can we be boyfriend and girlfriend? But

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<v Speaker 1>there was this one guy, Nathan Stanley, who fucking loved

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<v Speaker 1>me like he loved me and his mum used to

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<v Speaker 1>wear I've told you used to work in the canteen,

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<v Speaker 1>and he'd go and steal me Fredo frogs. And I

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<v Speaker 1>just used to kind of string him along because I

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<v Speaker 1>always wanted the Fredo frogs.

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<v Speaker 2>It's a tale as old as time.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh it's so good the freddo.

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<v Speaker 2>How unsettling is it? Like I look at AlOH when

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<v Speaker 2>I think, oh, he's still a baby, he's still a baby.

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<v Speaker 2>I was his age when I had my first kiss.

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<v Speaker 1>Are you real? Yeah?

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<v Speaker 2>We've talked, yeah, tongue like it was on Camp Dick

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<v Speaker 2>Brenton Steel, my grade six boyfriend. I was in grade five,

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<v Speaker 2>he was in grade six.

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<v Speaker 1>So you were Arlo's age. That's just so it's too young.

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<v Speaker 1>That's so unbelieved. I said to him, you know, do

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<v Speaker 1>you have you given her a kiss on the cheek?

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<v Speaker 1>He's like no, Like I can tell he's nowhere. They're

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<v Speaker 1>near there. He's still a very young ten year old. Like,

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<v Speaker 1>while having a girlfriend, he's already in a club. He's

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<v Speaker 1>also in a game called the Bumblebee Gang. So exactly

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<v Speaker 1>that is what I want. I'm like, I want you

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<v Speaker 1>to stay as innocent and as young as possible. But

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<v Speaker 1>he does have this girlfriend. Anyway, I said to him, so,

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<v Speaker 1>how's this other kid who goes to school? I saw

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<v Speaker 1>his mum and I said, you know, how's Billy. Do

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<v Speaker 1>you see Billy at school? And he goes, why And

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<v Speaker 1>I said, no reason, I just saw Billy's mom. I'm asking.

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<v Speaker 1>He goes, he's flirting with that. I'm not going to

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<v Speaker 1>say her name. He's flirting with Sally. And I said, really,

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<v Speaker 1>I mean Sally's allowed to have other boys that are

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<v Speaker 1>friends and She's like, no, who's really flirting with her?

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<v Speaker 1>And I don't like it at all? They of young

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<v Speaker 1>Love's so good. Anyway, you have a list, moving on

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<v Speaker 1>to something completely unconnected, of baby names that have been banned.

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<v Speaker 1>Every now and then this happens because somebody just stretches

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<v Speaker 1>it a little too far. Well, it comes out.

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<v Speaker 3>I think.

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<v Speaker 2>I think it's yearly maybe, But it's an official list

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<v Speaker 2>of names that are banned in Australia. Names you, there's

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<v Speaker 2>eighty nine names you aren't legally unable.

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<v Speaker 1>To call your kyeah.

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<v Speaker 2>Right, So the names that are prohibited are names that

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<v Speaker 2>are obscene or offensive, include swear words, descriptions of violent

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<v Speaker 2>or sexual acts, racial or cultural slurs, alcohol or drug references,

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<v Speaker 2>or any words intended to insult or offend. Fair enough, fair,

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<v Speaker 2>there are a few that feel a bit harsh to

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<v Speaker 2>ban for me, So right, Australia is banned. I wouldn't

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<v Speaker 2>say my kidnap, but I mean that could be a

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<v Speaker 2>cute name. Like It's like when you think Aurelia is

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<v Speaker 2>a name.

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<v Speaker 1>But is Aralia or a country? Now?

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<v Speaker 2>But what does it matter if the kids called a country?

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<v Speaker 3>I don't even get why it's weird that it's banned.

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<v Speaker 3>It is weird because you imagine calling your kid us

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<v Speaker 3>A hold on, aren't people called England and London?

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<v Speaker 1>London?

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<v Speaker 2>Definitely London, but that's a city.

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<v Speaker 1>I guess you can call kids Victoria as well and Adelaide. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>but yes, the country. Yeah the line.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, Duke, which I actually think is a cute name.

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<v Speaker 2>I know, Duke d uk E. Yeah, well, this is

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<v Speaker 2>the thing. The second then the third name that I

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<v Speaker 2>noticed was Justice.

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<v Speaker 1>Which I think he's people justice as well is.

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<v Speaker 2>Just is Justice. So I'm like, these must be more recent.

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<v Speaker 1>They have to be because Duke is the same age

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<v Speaker 1>as Baxter, so he's thirteen, and.

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<v Speaker 2>Duke's a great name.

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<v Speaker 1>It's an awesome name. It's definitely d uk and yes,

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<v Speaker 1>Justice is Pip's son, so it has to be newer.

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<v Speaker 1>Justice is a great name.

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<v Speaker 2>Too, yes, but I think so it's like, there seems

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<v Speaker 2>to be on this list a real general thing with titles,

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<v Speaker 2>So there's like Lieutenant, Lady General, Emperor, Pope, father, right,

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<v Speaker 2>so you know, obviously it's a very recent thing if

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<v Speaker 2>you're talking about a thirteen year old called Duke, but

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<v Speaker 2>that seems preposterous to me. Yeah, one of the names

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<v Speaker 2>on there is Ned Kelly. Does that mean that if

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<v Speaker 2>your surname's Kelly, you can't call you kid ned? Or

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<v Speaker 2>does it mean that the first name can't be so

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<v Speaker 2>it can't be like Ned Kelly, Diamond, like Julie?

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<v Speaker 1>How are you not allowed that? Is it like his?

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<v Speaker 1>What is it called? When houses you can't knock down

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<v Speaker 1>the front of house? And heritage? Yeah, maybe it's a

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<v Speaker 1>heritage listed name.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, I don't know. He was a bad was he

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<v Speaker 2>a baddie?

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<v Speaker 1>Well? Yeah, he was a bushrange stranger. Yeah, but also

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<v Speaker 1>like you wouldn't say you like you wanted to call

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<v Speaker 1>your son Ivan Malatt Like I know you wouldn't. But

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<v Speaker 1>is that illegal?

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<v Speaker 2>Well, this is the strange thing that dickhead and shitthead

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<v Speaker 2>are on there, but fuckhead I'll beat this, fuck stick

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<v Speaker 2>and dumbcunt are not. Do not beat that, oh, because

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<v Speaker 2>you know some people have real issues with that word.

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<v Speaker 2>I love it, So they seem much more aggressive to me,

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<v Speaker 2>So like a shithead, And why would shithead and dickhead

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<v Speaker 2>even be on the list, And then those other names not?

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<v Speaker 1>You know why they're on there because people have put

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<v Speaker 1>these forward. That's what's happened. I don't think that they've

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<v Speaker 1>actually gone are like out of all the heads, Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>those ones are gonna is. People have put it through.

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<v Speaker 2>People have applied. Well, well, their niece is really concerning

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<v Speaker 2>because here are some of my personal favorites. Long head Commodore.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh wow, cyanide ah, I mean cy cyh for sure, Facebook,

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<v Speaker 2>G Bang not G Banger, just G Bang Bang, I

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<v Speaker 2>kia iMac, Jesus Christ made care.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my, is this this for a real?

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<v Speaker 2>This is for real? I saw it on multiple multiple sites. Wow, Natala,

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<v Speaker 2>Why can't you call the kid Natala? So is it

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<v Speaker 2>any brand? I don't know. It doesn't walk like Natala's

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<v Speaker 2>not offensive either, So I don't know how these guidelines work.

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<v Speaker 2>But Osama bin Laden and Adolf Hitler. Imagine you're at

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<v Speaker 2>the park with your kid and your kid's names Adolf Hitler,

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<v Speaker 2>and you're going Adolf Hitler, Adolf Hitler, come on, time

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<v Speaker 2>to go home, Adolf Hitler. Or if your kid said

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<v Speaker 2>Imaginallo said mum, can my friend Osama bin Laden, Comfort

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<v Speaker 2>and some other ones are Passport Ranger, RoboCop, Satan, Scrotum,

0:11:44.679 --> 0:11:46.760
<v Speaker 2>soccer Rouse and constable.

0:11:47.960 --> 0:11:53.160
<v Speaker 1>Wow, I reckon that has to be where people have

0:11:53.200 --> 0:11:55.400
<v Speaker 1>gone to put them through. I still think justice and

0:11:55.520 --> 0:11:59.560
<v Speaker 1>Juke is madness, so crazy, but I do think that

0:11:59.600 --> 0:12:01.880
<v Speaker 1>there is some form of protection that has to happen

0:12:01.920 --> 0:12:04.520
<v Speaker 1>for the kid. But I imagine gone a bit far.

0:12:04.880 --> 0:12:06.959
<v Speaker 1>But Ikea is like if you wanted to call your kid,

0:12:06.960 --> 0:12:08.480
<v Speaker 1>I Kia Kiki.

0:12:08.800 --> 0:12:14.840
<v Speaker 2>That's cute, And imagine your name was RoboCop in the playground, or.

0:12:15.000 --> 0:12:21.360
<v Speaker 1>Just imagine it was just Natella Natella. That's well.

0:12:21.400 --> 0:12:23.960
<v Speaker 2>I wonder if Natino the imo Natella.

0:12:24.280 --> 0:12:27.000
<v Speaker 1>Is there a Natino? I bet it doesn't taste anywhere

0:12:27.000 --> 0:12:27.560
<v Speaker 1>near as good.

0:12:27.800 --> 0:12:29.520
<v Speaker 2>No, I don't know if it's a nut free version

0:12:29.600 --> 0:12:32.360
<v Speaker 2>or something, or the version woggier version.

0:12:32.480 --> 0:12:36.800
<v Speaker 1>I don't think Natino would be nut free, do you.

0:12:39.400 --> 0:12:44.360
<v Speaker 1>I don't reckon Here we go into something else completely

0:12:44.360 --> 0:12:46.240
<v Speaker 1>not related to the names. But I want to talk

0:12:46.240 --> 0:12:49.680
<v Speaker 1>about irrational things that really bother you. I think I've

0:12:49.760 --> 0:12:53.960
<v Speaker 1>mentioned this before, but last night a basic dinner, Alo

0:12:54.160 --> 0:12:57.000
<v Speaker 1>was having eggs on toast. I said, Sammy, can you

0:12:57.040 --> 0:13:00.200
<v Speaker 1>make the eggs just scrambled eggs on toast? So he

0:13:00.240 --> 0:13:02.640
<v Speaker 1>puts the eggs in the pot and he gets a whisk.

0:13:03.600 --> 0:13:10.600
<v Speaker 1>The way this man fucking whisks is so ridiculous. It

0:13:10.640 --> 0:13:14.240
<v Speaker 1>goes for about five minutes and it's so fucking hard

0:13:14.240 --> 0:13:17.840
<v Speaker 1>and aggressive that I literally griped my teeth and close

0:13:17.920 --> 0:13:20.200
<v Speaker 1>my eyes through it because I'm like, don't tell him off.

0:13:20.720 --> 0:13:24.480
<v Speaker 1>It's not tellof worthy, but in my head it's going

0:13:24.520 --> 0:13:28.080
<v Speaker 1>against it. It pains me how he whisks an.

0:13:28.000 --> 0:13:33.959
<v Speaker 2>Egg something about men and noises. Why are they so loud?

0:13:34.240 --> 0:13:36.920
<v Speaker 1>They're so loud like the I mean, it goes without

0:13:36.920 --> 0:13:39.120
<v Speaker 1>saying all of us get annoyed with how they chew,

0:13:39.640 --> 0:13:42.680
<v Speaker 1>the way he chooses so aggressive, and it's so it's

0:13:42.720 --> 0:13:44.280
<v Speaker 1>like he's got a mind. I'm like, it looks like

0:13:44.280 --> 0:13:47.480
<v Speaker 1>you've got a microphone in your mouth, Like it's so loud.

0:13:48.040 --> 0:13:53.600
<v Speaker 2>But it's also like Mark, yawn's really loud. Oh it's late,

0:13:53.679 --> 0:13:56.959
<v Speaker 2>like it could be eleven thirty. I'm down here working.

0:13:57.280 --> 0:14:00.480
<v Speaker 2>He's like in the there's like every time I say

0:14:00.559 --> 0:14:02.400
<v Speaker 2>this sounds like I live in a marchion, but I don't.

0:14:02.400 --> 0:14:04.679
<v Speaker 2>But it's the house is across three levels, right, so

0:14:04.960 --> 0:14:07.440
<v Speaker 2>I'm at the bottom, he's in the middle. The kids

0:14:07.440 --> 0:14:10.800
<v Speaker 2>are asleep at the top, right, Like he yawns, but

0:14:10.840 --> 0:14:17.280
<v Speaker 2>he has to yawn and go the kids are sleeping.

0:14:17.640 --> 0:14:22.240
<v Speaker 2>Every time he's just say can you record him? I'm

0:14:22.280 --> 0:14:25.560
<v Speaker 2>going to record next time he whisks, I'm going to

0:14:25.640 --> 0:14:28.360
<v Speaker 2>get my phone and I'm going to record it because

0:14:28.400 --> 0:14:30.560
<v Speaker 2>you'll see how annoying it is. It's like he gets

0:14:30.840 --> 0:14:36.840
<v Speaker 2>scrapes every part of the pan. Oh, it's so fucked up.

0:14:37.160 --> 0:14:40.000
<v Speaker 2>Mark's heavy on his feet. And when he's walking around

0:14:40.040 --> 0:14:43.280
<v Speaker 2>the house in slippers, which I would never wear.

0:14:43.760 --> 0:14:45.520
<v Speaker 1>Really would you never wear a slipper?

0:14:46.000 --> 0:14:48.520
<v Speaker 2>Always barefoot, which he can't can't.

0:14:48.600 --> 0:14:50.840
<v Speaker 1>I can never. I will have my re what do

0:14:50.920 --> 0:14:54.880
<v Speaker 1>they call, like birkenstocks on, or my slippers on. I

0:14:54.920 --> 0:14:56.560
<v Speaker 1>cannot walk a barefoot on a tile.

0:14:56.880 --> 0:14:58.680
<v Speaker 2>I never have shoes on in the house. It doesn't

0:14:58.720 --> 0:15:01.960
<v Speaker 2>matter if it's the epths of winter. My feet are

0:15:01.960 --> 0:15:05.800
<v Speaker 2>always really Yeah, but the sound of the slippers kill me.

0:15:05.960 --> 0:15:09.720
<v Speaker 2>The sound of thongs, pop, sound of thongs.

0:15:09.880 --> 0:15:12.960
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. See Sam, when he's footless, he's got a flat

0:15:13.000 --> 0:15:16.880
<v Speaker 1>foot and so on the tiles, it's like it's like

0:15:16.920 --> 0:15:19.200
<v Speaker 1>they're gripping each time he lives.

0:15:19.280 --> 0:15:21.560
<v Speaker 2>Oh my god. And it's like the noises, Like I've

0:15:21.560 --> 0:15:23.400
<v Speaker 2>said this before, but with the ice cream at night,

0:15:24.680 --> 0:15:28.360
<v Speaker 2>we put our loads on a plastic.

0:15:29.040 --> 0:15:30.840
<v Speaker 1>Goes into tap of air. Every night. We put it

0:15:30.840 --> 0:15:33.480
<v Speaker 1>in tap ofwir because you try. I'm like, it's empty, mate,

0:15:33.600 --> 0:15:36.440
<v Speaker 1>it's empty. Like it drives me crackers.

0:15:36.520 --> 0:15:38.600
<v Speaker 2>I said, I'd rather you stick your tongue in there

0:15:38.600 --> 0:15:40.440
<v Speaker 2>and lick it out, Like, yeah, that's.

0:15:40.280 --> 0:15:43.880
<v Speaker 1>Sound doing that. When you're a kid, you lick the

0:15:43.920 --> 0:15:44.760
<v Speaker 1>whole bowl out.

0:15:45.360 --> 0:15:48.400
<v Speaker 2>I still lick something if I really, like, do you really?

0:15:48.680 --> 0:15:51.040
<v Speaker 2>I mean not in public, but if.

0:15:53.840 --> 0:15:55.560
<v Speaker 1>I would, that's weird.

0:15:55.840 --> 0:15:59.720
<v Speaker 2>Leak knives y, I'd lock a knife, dare devil live

0:15:59.760 --> 0:16:01.880
<v Speaker 2>on the I wouldn't lick a play.

0:16:01.840 --> 0:16:05.440
<v Speaker 1>That's so ridiculous. Okay, something else that's a rational that

0:16:05.520 --> 0:16:10.640
<v Speaker 1>annoys me. Tell me's on Instagram when people go like,

0:16:10.680 --> 0:16:13.360
<v Speaker 1>they'll put up a video and they'll go. She didn't

0:16:13.400 --> 0:16:17.680
<v Speaker 1>know this yet, but in ten years she will have

0:16:17.800 --> 0:16:20.920
<v Speaker 1>two kids when she thought she would have none. She

0:16:21.000 --> 0:16:24.680
<v Speaker 1>has found the man of her dreams. Oh, I cannot.

0:16:24.800 --> 0:16:27.200
<v Speaker 1>It's a very gwenous Paltrow thing to do. She saw it.

0:16:27.360 --> 0:16:29.520
<v Speaker 1>She did it the other day and I was like, fuck,

0:16:29.560 --> 0:16:31.000
<v Speaker 1>I hate when people do that.

0:16:31.600 --> 0:16:34.600
<v Speaker 2>I mean the idea. I think the original idea is

0:16:34.680 --> 0:16:38.760
<v Speaker 2>probably spawned by trying to make people think hang in

0:16:38.800 --> 0:16:40.480
<v Speaker 2>there it'll get better, yeah, or whatever.

0:16:40.280 --> 0:16:42.400
<v Speaker 1>Because you don't know what your future. Of course, the

0:16:42.480 --> 0:16:46.120
<v Speaker 1>sentiment's great, the actual practicality of it and reading it

0:16:46.160 --> 0:16:48.720
<v Speaker 1>is so nauseating.

0:16:47.960 --> 0:16:49.600
<v Speaker 2>Because now it's just narcissistic.

0:16:49.760 --> 0:16:50.920
<v Speaker 1>Now sarcissistic.

0:16:51.160 --> 0:16:54.400
<v Speaker 2>Look at my life, Look at what I've achieved. Yeah,

0:16:54.960 --> 0:16:57.640
<v Speaker 2>it is what it is. But this would be me

0:16:58.040 --> 0:17:02.000
<v Speaker 2>fifteen years ago. She doesn't know it yet, but she'll

0:17:02.040 --> 0:17:05.639
<v Speaker 2>lose her job because she falls pregnant. She'll give birth

0:17:05.720 --> 0:17:10.080
<v Speaker 2>to three neurodivergent children. Her mum will die of cancer

0:17:10.160 --> 0:17:13.960
<v Speaker 2>in front of her eyes. She will spiral into a depression.

0:17:17.119 --> 0:17:18.680
<v Speaker 1>I should put that on install.

0:17:18.680 --> 0:17:21.480
<v Speaker 2>I don't know what. That's a fucking great idea, if

0:17:21.480 --> 0:17:23.960
<v Speaker 2>we should do one each. She didn't know it yet,

0:17:24.600 --> 0:17:27.240
<v Speaker 2>but she was going to completely spiral out of control.

0:17:27.760 --> 0:17:30.280
<v Speaker 1>She was going to get anxiety and depression and go

0:17:30.359 --> 0:17:34.120
<v Speaker 1>through six lots of medication before she had to move

0:17:34.200 --> 0:17:36.199
<v Speaker 1>to a full mood stabilizer.

0:17:37.240 --> 0:17:39.399
<v Speaker 2>She was going to hate her life in ways she

0:17:39.600 --> 0:17:40.520
<v Speaker 2>never imagined.

0:17:41.040 --> 0:17:44.520
<v Speaker 1>She's going to sit in the downstairs level for days

0:17:44.560 --> 0:17:49.399
<v Speaker 1>on end and become a vampire. I fucking love it.

0:17:49.480 --> 0:17:51.320
<v Speaker 2>That is a brilliant idea.

0:17:52.000 --> 0:17:53.920
<v Speaker 1>That is so funny. Oh my god.

0:17:54.160 --> 0:17:57.359
<v Speaker 2>I am also like that with people saying stuff like

0:17:57.760 --> 0:18:00.240
<v Speaker 2>I'm not crying, you're crying. Yeah, you know, it's like

0:18:00.560 --> 0:18:02.919
<v Speaker 2>someone cutting onions in here, Yeah.

0:18:03.000 --> 0:18:06.560
<v Speaker 1>Like denying them. Yeah, I'm not crying, you're crying. I know.

0:18:06.680 --> 0:18:09.080
<v Speaker 1>It's so well, yeah.

0:18:08.560 --> 0:18:10.800
<v Speaker 2>You know what I've got on my list. That is

0:18:10.880 --> 0:18:13.200
<v Speaker 2>such a silly thing that I don't even know if

0:18:13.200 --> 0:18:16.840
<v Speaker 2>people do anymore. Remember when you'd walk into a shop

0:18:16.920 --> 0:18:20.399
<v Speaker 2>like Maya or whatever, the people with the perfumes.

0:18:19.880 --> 0:18:21.080
<v Speaker 1>Oh, the perfume samplers.

0:18:21.240 --> 0:18:23.240
<v Speaker 2>Are they still around? I fucking hate that.

0:18:23.560 --> 0:18:25.600
<v Speaker 1>I can't tell you how long it is since I've

0:18:25.640 --> 0:18:28.240
<v Speaker 1>been into a place like that. I don't even know

0:18:28.280 --> 0:18:32.760
<v Speaker 1>the last time I went into a shop, let into

0:18:32.840 --> 0:18:34.960
<v Speaker 1>a department store, but it used to give me a

0:18:35.000 --> 0:18:37.639
<v Speaker 1>headache as a kid walking through. They'd just be spraying

0:18:37.680 --> 0:18:40.200
<v Speaker 1>them in there, you know, their black and white uniforms.

0:18:40.359 --> 0:18:43.040
<v Speaker 1>I vividly remember, though. I saw an actor from Home

0:18:43.080 --> 0:18:45.720
<v Speaker 1>and Away do it once and I was very young,

0:18:45.960 --> 0:18:48.399
<v Speaker 1>and it made me sad because I'm like, they clearly

0:18:48.440 --> 0:18:52.680
<v Speaker 1>weren't didn't have jobs anymore, so they were a perfume sampler.

0:18:52.440 --> 0:18:54.240
<v Speaker 2>Such a front facing.

0:18:54.040 --> 0:18:57.439
<v Speaker 1>Oh it was so it just confronted me and I

0:18:57.480 --> 0:18:58.240
<v Speaker 1>was very young.

0:18:59.200 --> 0:19:01.399
<v Speaker 2>Little did they know that they'd go from an acting

0:19:01.520 --> 0:19:06.600
<v Speaker 2>career to a perfume spoil that funny.

0:19:06.920 --> 0:19:10.040
<v Speaker 1>Alright, well let's get out of here. Mal. Thank you

0:19:10.119 --> 0:19:12.800
<v Speaker 1>so much for listening. Hit us up with anything that

0:19:13.320 --> 0:19:17.160
<v Speaker 1>irrationally annoys you, because they're bloody funny. Because the stuff

0:19:17.200 --> 0:19:19.679
<v Speaker 1>that annoys us all is so ridiculous that you have

0:19:19.720 --> 0:19:21.280
<v Speaker 1>to keep half of them in. But this is the

0:19:21.320 --> 0:19:22.920
<v Speaker 1>forum that you can let it out. Shaw and Tel

0:19:23.040 --> 0:19:25.439
<v Speaker 1>Podcasts is where you can find us. We have a

0:19:25.440 --> 0:19:29.640
<v Speaker 1>Patreon where we do a little episode every two weeks

0:19:29.680 --> 0:19:33.679
<v Speaker 1>for those guys, I think it starts about five months.

0:19:33.680 --> 0:19:36.440
<v Speaker 1>Five bucks a month for a membership just helps with

0:19:36.480 --> 0:19:39.040
<v Speaker 1>the running of the podcast. Give us a rating or

0:19:39.119 --> 0:19:41.160
<v Speaker 1>a comment wherever you listen to your podcast and we'll

0:19:41.160 --> 0:19:41.800
<v Speaker 1>touch you soon.

0:19:42.560 --> 0:19:42.879
<v Speaker 2>Love you.