WEBVTT - Dealing With In-laws From Hell 0:00:00.320 --> 0:00:02.759 This podcast was recorded on the land of the Gatigel 0:00:02.800 --> 0:00:04.160 people of the Uran nation. 0:00:16.720 --> 0:00:19.000 Welcome back to our lovely ladies and lads. 0:00:19.120 --> 0:00:20.640 Lovely ladies and lads. 0:00:20.640 --> 0:00:23.200 Bro, have you ever had anything original to say ever 0:00:23.760 --> 0:00:25.599 at an opening? Or you just copy what I say 0:00:25.640 --> 0:00:33.479 mostly the same every tirements. Well, yeah, welcome. Thanks for 0:00:33.560 --> 0:00:35.239 joining us for another week on the pod means a lot. 0:00:35.320 --> 0:00:37.000 Thanks for joining us means a lot. 0:00:37.360 --> 0:00:41.159 You cool. You will be glad you tuned in this week, 0:00:41.520 --> 0:00:43.559 although we hope you tuned in every week. But we 0:00:43.600 --> 0:00:45.519 had a little fun last week with your Avenge stories, 0:00:45.560 --> 0:00:48.480 and this week we're bringing back a fan favorite, which 0:00:48.520 --> 0:00:50.600 is in Laws from hell Stone. 0:00:51.080 --> 0:00:55.520 The influx of messages were received for this These always 0:00:55.560 --> 0:00:58.240 absolutely peaking my d ms, and honestly the best ones 0:00:58.280 --> 0:01:01.360 are pretty hard to sift through, but yeah, stick around 0:01:01.400 --> 0:01:04.520 to enjoy the torture that some people have to have to. 0:01:04.480 --> 0:01:07.240 Go through, and yeah, be grateful. I guess if you 0:01:07.319 --> 0:01:09.160 like chadding myself and you get along with your in 0:01:09.240 --> 0:01:10.920 laws and you like spending time with them, So yeah, 0:01:10.959 --> 0:01:12.840 when I read these stories, I feel very blessed that 0:01:12.920 --> 0:01:16.600 I'm not in this position, because I don't know how some. 0:01:16.440 --> 0:01:18.640 Of you guys are resilient. 0:01:18.240 --> 0:01:20.160 Like some people I write back to and I go, 0:01:20.800 --> 0:01:22.360 do you like, how do you deal with this? How 0:01:22.400 --> 0:01:25.000 do you actually continue to have this person in your life? 0:01:25.280 --> 0:01:28.480 Like dealing with this sort of stuff continuously, I would 0:01:28.600 --> 0:01:30.200 be sick of it, like it has to end, right. 0:01:30.920 --> 0:01:32.480 And some people are like, oh, you know, I just 0:01:32.800 --> 0:01:34.920 I have to because he's close with his family or 0:01:35.000 --> 0:01:38.760 vice versa. And it's holy Moly that you're bigger people 0:01:38.800 --> 0:01:40.320 than me, because I would just be like, no worries. 0:01:40.360 --> 0:01:42.520 I'm never attending a family event if that person's there, 0:01:42.560 --> 0:01:44.319 if they're going to continue to do X, Y and Z, 0:01:44.480 --> 0:01:48.520 so yeah, good on you, But yeah, tough tough situations 0:01:48.560 --> 0:01:51.120 for some. And after the in law drama, we haven't 0:01:51.120 --> 0:01:53.000 asked my dad? From a girl who says she may 0:01:53.120 --> 0:01:55.360 have lost the spark and doesn't know what to do. 0:01:56.440 --> 0:02:02.400 So, no, what is the spark? 0:02:02.600 --> 0:02:02.960 I don't know? 0:02:03.000 --> 0:02:04.640 You tell me. It sounds like something you'd know a 0:02:04.680 --> 0:02:05.160 lot about. 0:02:06.040 --> 0:02:14.359 I think it's lost? Is it? Sometimes sounds like you're 0:02:14.360 --> 0:02:19.120 pretty sure of all right? Do you have you ever 0:02:19.600 --> 0:02:21.520 before we spill other people's too, do you want to 0:02:21.520 --> 0:02:24.720 do you have any you know stories about dating people 0:02:24.760 --> 0:02:26.079 in laws that were a bit weird. 0:02:26.520 --> 0:02:29.639 I had an X whose mum gave me a book 0:02:30.160 --> 0:02:32.760 after we had a big argument where he was screaming 0:02:32.760 --> 0:02:34.520 at me on their driveway. 0:02:35.200 --> 0:02:37.320 And she knew about that, like she was privy to. 0:02:37.280 --> 0:02:39.520 The the whole neighborhood heard about it. 0:02:39.639 --> 0:02:41.800 I was saying, like, it wasn't you and his driveway, 0:02:41.800 --> 0:02:43.360 like you lived together, It was her driveway. 0:02:43.480 --> 0:02:47.119 Yes, it was their family home, so she heard that. Yes. 0:02:46.760 --> 0:02:50.080 She was dropping me off home after the argument in 0:02:50.120 --> 0:02:53.680 their car. She recommended a book to me called Women 0:02:53.720 --> 0:02:57.560 Who Loved Too Much, and it was basically about it 0:02:59.000 --> 0:03:01.240 I read. I start reading it because I was like 0:03:01.360 --> 0:03:02.920 in a place in my life where I was like 0:03:03.480 --> 0:03:06.880 desperate for any help with this scenario and I wanted 0:03:06.919 --> 0:03:09.600 to make it work, and I had convinced myself that 0:03:09.639 --> 0:03:13.040 I was the problem. And this book was basically a 0:03:13.040 --> 0:03:16.720 book to that kind of teaches you that you need 0:03:16.760 --> 0:03:19.680 to essentially like be a bitch and play a game 0:03:20.360 --> 0:03:23.120 and not show too much interest because men don't like that. 0:03:23.680 --> 0:03:25.480 It was just like the opposite of everything you should 0:03:25.520 --> 0:03:29.480 be teaching women. Basically, don't be yourself because being yourself 0:03:29.720 --> 0:03:33.880 is not convenient for this man. It's just a horrible message. 0:03:33.880 --> 0:03:34.840 It's interesting to take you. 0:03:35.080 --> 0:03:38.240 Yeah. Yeah, so she told me to read that book. 0:03:39.040 --> 0:03:40.480 So that was that. 0:03:41.160 --> 0:03:44.240 Yeah, yeah, that sounds nice. She was just trying to 0:03:44.320 --> 0:03:44.640 help them. 0:03:44.920 --> 0:03:48.800 And then there was a point where I had shared 0:03:48.800 --> 0:03:53.680 something online about being in like an emotionally abusive relationship 0:03:53.720 --> 0:03:55.920 with one of my exes and I didn't say who, 0:03:57.240 --> 0:04:01.080 and she she called me one night after she'd obviously 0:04:01.120 --> 0:04:06.920 seen it. Somehow we had broken up and she called 0:04:06.920 --> 0:04:08.920 me on the phone and I picked up because I 0:04:09.000 --> 0:04:11.600 was like, is something I thought maybe something was wrong 0:04:12.040 --> 0:04:14.880 because we had been broken up, but not for super long, 0:04:15.120 --> 0:04:18.240 like not crazy long amount of time, but like long 0:04:18.360 --> 0:04:21.680 enough for it to be weird. And she had called me, 0:04:21.720 --> 0:04:23.400 and I thought she was calling me to say, like 0:04:23.440 --> 0:04:26.599 something had happened, I don't know, an accident or something like. 0:04:26.640 --> 0:04:29.200 That's where my brain went immediately, like something's really wrong. 0:04:29.240 --> 0:04:33.200 That's why she's called me. And she called me to 0:04:33.560 --> 0:04:38.120 basically threaten me by saying we know things about you 0:04:39.279 --> 0:04:42.200 and not to talk about her son online because they 0:04:42.240 --> 0:04:45.040 would release information. I don't know what she was referring to, 0:04:45.200 --> 0:04:47.760 what she thinks she knew about me that would be 0:04:47.839 --> 0:04:50.719 somehow threatening to me or my position or my life 0:04:51.760 --> 0:04:56.280 really was really weird phone call. And then I proceeded 0:04:56.279 --> 0:04:59.040 to allude to the fact that her son was doing 0:04:59.080 --> 0:05:00.960 things that she didn't know about and she should ask 0:05:01.040 --> 0:05:02.520 him about that instead of calling me. 0:05:02.920 --> 0:05:05.040 Oh like what, so you just threw him under the bus? 0:05:05.120 --> 0:05:08.240 Yeah, one. And I was kind of like, why don't 0:05:08.279 --> 0:05:10.960 you worry about your son instead of calling me and 0:05:11.000 --> 0:05:11.880 trying to threaten me. 0:05:13.240 --> 0:05:15.800 Yeah, it doesn't sound pleasant anyway. So was she nice 0:05:15.800 --> 0:05:19.320 when you were dating it? Yeah, well that's all the matters. Yeah, 0:05:19.680 --> 0:05:21.160 well mother in law at the time, you know, like, 0:05:21.240 --> 0:05:22.800 who cares if you're not with him? Then if she's 0:05:22.800 --> 0:05:24.240 a nightmare, it doesn't matter because don't have to deal 0:05:24.279 --> 0:05:24.719 with her anymore. 0:05:24.760 --> 0:05:26.600 Yeah, but it was a weird dynamic as well. It's 0:05:26.680 --> 0:05:28.839 very much like women serve the men in that family. 0:05:29.080 --> 0:05:32.600 Oh okay, Like when the men came over for family events, 0:05:32.640 --> 0:05:34.279 they all sat around in the living room and I 0:05:34.320 --> 0:05:37.359 had to go chop tomatoes in the kitchen and I 0:05:37.480 --> 0:05:39.599 wasn't very I wasn't a very good chopper either. 0:05:40.240 --> 0:05:41.520 I guess what's still not my love? 0:05:41.640 --> 0:05:44.960 Still, I was like, this is not for me. 0:05:45.240 --> 0:05:47.600 Sometimes when I'm teaching fletched to chop, I'm like, oh, 0:05:47.680 --> 0:05:48.640 dad's watching right now. 0:05:52.560 --> 0:05:54.039 Yeah, I don't know if I have I don't really 0:05:54.080 --> 0:05:55.160 have much to share. 0:05:55.360 --> 0:05:59.520 I do remember once I was living with a partner 0:06:00.040 --> 0:06:02.440 and her mom came to visit, who lived into state, 0:06:02.680 --> 0:06:05.080 so she was visiting for maybe a little while. And 0:06:05.120 --> 0:06:08.920 I actually hadn't been told this information. I only found 0:06:08.960 --> 0:06:10.960 out after the fact, but her mum had a bit 0:06:11.000 --> 0:06:16.159 of an issue with alcohol, essentially an alcoholic, but had 0:06:16.240 --> 0:06:18.599 been not drinking for a while or trying to that 0:06:18.640 --> 0:06:22.120 the family knew, of sure, and I was never told 0:06:22.160 --> 0:06:25.200 this information. So at our house there was like bottles 0:06:25.240 --> 0:06:28.200 of wine and you know, gifts that have been given 0:06:28.200 --> 0:06:29.720 to us, Like we were't big drinkers, but there was 0:06:29.720 --> 0:06:32.440 still stuff around, you know what I mean. And one 0:06:32.560 --> 0:06:34.760 night we went out while she was there for the week, 0:06:34.800 --> 0:06:36.920 whether it was to dinner or see friends or maybe 0:06:36.920 --> 0:06:42.400 even to work, I think it was, and we came 0:06:42.520 --> 0:06:47.280 home and like lots of our alcohols missing and had 0:06:47.320 --> 0:06:51.320 been drunk, and she'd obviously passed out and gone to bed, 0:06:51.440 --> 0:06:54.039 and I actually I didn't think anything of it because 0:06:54.040 --> 0:06:55.680 I didn't know that she had an issue with it. 0:06:55.720 --> 0:06:57.600 And then the person that I was seeing was like 0:06:57.880 --> 0:07:00.360 really upset and shut off, and I was like, what's 0:07:00.400 --> 0:07:02.680 going on? And she told me she was like, oh, 0:07:02.760 --> 0:07:05.479 my mom's an alcoholic and hasn't been drinking, and I've 0:07:05.480 --> 0:07:07.279 come home and she's obviously drinking, you know, like and 0:07:07.320 --> 0:07:10.280 it was this big thing. And then obviously they're battling 0:07:10.320 --> 0:07:12.680 and in the house, you know, and it was odd. 0:07:12.720 --> 0:07:15.520 But yeah, that was probably like the only like, I 0:07:15.560 --> 0:07:18.440 don't know, interesting experience i'd have, Like I've most of 0:07:18.600 --> 0:07:22.280 the people have been relatively nice parents that have not 0:07:22.400 --> 0:07:25.480 been lucky, not been weird. Yeah, so yeah, very lucky 0:07:25.480 --> 0:07:29.080 me and then obviously yourself. Now we get along swimmingly. 0:07:29.120 --> 0:07:32.240 So happy days, all right. So let's get into some 0:07:32.280 --> 0:07:35.440 of you else which are not as nice, all right. 0:07:35.480 --> 0:07:37.480 First one says my mother in law broke into the 0:07:37.520 --> 0:07:40.280 delivery room before I was stitched up and before my 0:07:40.440 --> 0:07:42.960 husband even got to hold the baby. She had asked 0:07:43.080 --> 0:07:45.320 days before if I wanted her in the room, and 0:07:45.360 --> 0:07:47.920 I said no. The nurses ended up kicking her out 0:07:48.000 --> 0:07:50.320 as they as they weren't supposed to be any visitors 0:07:50.360 --> 0:07:53.280 until I'd moved to the maternity war. My father in 0:07:53.400 --> 0:07:56.280 law was with her and he was mortified when he 0:07:56.360 --> 0:07:58.760 realized that they weren't supposed to be in there. And 0:07:58.840 --> 0:08:01.200 what a mess I was as there was still blood 0:08:01.280 --> 0:08:02.200 all over the floor. 0:08:03.000 --> 0:08:08.000 That's file Why do people do? That's arguably so unforgivable. Sorry, 0:08:08.120 --> 0:08:09.680 I would not be seeing my in laws for a 0:08:09.720 --> 0:08:10.320 long time. 0:08:10.520 --> 0:08:12.920 What's the I mean? The man didn't do any wrong. 0:08:13.000 --> 0:08:14.320 Seems like he was coerced. 0:08:14.000 --> 0:08:15.920 Into following obviously. 0:08:15.600 --> 0:08:16.880 Yeah, he didn't really know that. 0:08:17.200 --> 0:08:22.560 I can't imagine. I can't imagine. I cannot imagine your 0:08:22.720 --> 0:08:27.680 mother being so unaware. No, your mother, my mother in law, 0:08:28.040 --> 0:08:31.480 being so unaware, not unaware, but just like defiant. We've 0:08:31.520 --> 0:08:36.079 said no to the point where you've come into the 0:08:36.240 --> 0:08:41.000 delivery room, the delivery room, not just the hospital. You 0:08:41.080 --> 0:08:44.320 have literally just had the baby and you haven't even 0:08:44.440 --> 0:08:49.080 been stitched up. I'm just imagining myself at that point, 0:08:49.240 --> 0:08:52.640 after being in labor for however long it was, You've 0:08:52.800 --> 0:08:55.960 just had the baby and you you are still on 0:08:56.000 --> 0:09:00.800 the bed bleeding, and someone's walked in and I I'm 0:09:00.840 --> 0:09:04.640 going I'm seeing things. I'm actually dying right now. This 0:09:04.800 --> 0:09:06.680 is me dying and I'm now seeing things. 0:09:07.080 --> 0:09:08.319 No, my mother in law is in heaven. 0:09:08.400 --> 0:09:12.160 Was what's going on. That's how crazy that is to 0:09:12.200 --> 0:09:14.960 me is that I don't think I would actually acknowledge 0:09:15.559 --> 0:09:18.200 that that was a real scenario that was actually. 0:09:18.080 --> 0:09:20.439 I wonder how like stuff like this puts a wedge 0:09:20.440 --> 0:09:23.440 in relationships forever, like a long time, you know, because 0:09:23.440 --> 0:09:25.960 I'm sure that's you know, that's something that a lot 0:09:25.960 --> 0:09:28.000 of people might not be able to see pass and 0:09:28.040 --> 0:09:30.400 get over because it is like such an intimate experience 0:09:30.440 --> 0:09:32.120 that maybe she's only going to experience once in a 0:09:32.160 --> 0:09:33.880 life one kid, and this is the moment, and that 0:09:33.960 --> 0:09:37.640 moment's been sort of tarnished and ruined by someone that 0:09:37.720 --> 0:09:41.959 she's explicitly given instructions to that's dismissed them and disrespected them. 0:09:41.960 --> 0:09:45.920 So yeah, a really tough one and sucks when you. 0:09:45.880 --> 0:09:49.520 Know in laws don't really adhere to boundaries, you know, 0:09:49.559 --> 0:09:51.679 and I think that you know, both of ours are 0:09:51.679 --> 0:09:54.640 pretty good at that, you know. Can you imagine, especially 0:09:54.640 --> 0:09:56.760 in comparison to hearing something like that. 0:09:56.840 --> 0:09:58.079 So sorry that was your experience. 0:09:58.160 --> 0:09:59.920 That's terrible. I'm really feel for. 0:09:59.880 --> 0:10:02.000 You, hopefully maybe forgiven it's a. 0:10:02.040 --> 0:10:04.960 Very raw thing for someone to walk in on without permission. 0:10:05.160 --> 0:10:07.760 Firstly, the poor father in law as well that which 0:10:07.840 --> 0:10:09.520 we thought he was just going in to meet the 0:10:09.520 --> 0:10:11.640 baby and didn't know that they had been told no, 0:10:11.800 --> 0:10:13.040 and that he wasn't meant to be there, Because that 0:10:13.040 --> 0:10:14.959 would be super embarrassing, and I'd look at my partner. 0:10:14.960 --> 0:10:16.760 I'd be like, you're a fuck with like why did 0:10:16.800 --> 0:10:19.400 we sorry? But you know, like we've really could. 0:10:19.480 --> 0:10:22.679 You would be so disappointed. Really, he'd be so embarrassed. 0:10:23.160 --> 0:10:25.840 It would just be a lot of different things that 0:10:25.880 --> 0:10:28.920 would And that's a horrible, horrible, horror way to start your. 0:10:28.840 --> 0:10:32.600 Relationship as a grandparents one in law. That's a certain 0:10:32.600 --> 0:10:34.240 way in cline, yeah, creature certain way. It doesn't mean 0:10:34.280 --> 0:10:34.680 that both do. 0:10:34.840 --> 0:10:35.120 Yeah. 0:10:35.200 --> 0:10:37.000 So yeah, a shame that he got pulled into them. 0:10:37.000 --> 0:10:48.520 Oh God, terrible. I used to be Christian and got 0:10:48.520 --> 0:10:51.280 married at nineteen six months in I found out my 0:10:51.400 --> 0:10:55.240 then husband had been cheating, interacting with adult content creators 0:10:56.200 --> 0:10:58.480 though we both said it was a no no, and 0:10:58.559 --> 0:11:01.600 sexual messages and folk with a friend who was at 0:11:01.640 --> 0:11:05.599 our engagement party. Because it was only online and allegedly 0:11:05.640 --> 0:11:07.880 not in person, him and his parents said it didn't 0:11:07.920 --> 0:11:10.800 count as cheating, and so according to the Bible, I 0:11:10.800 --> 0:11:14.640 couldn't leave him. I completely disagreed and was so heartbroken, 0:11:14.720 --> 0:11:18.040 but decided to formally leave him. After another six months 0:11:19.040 --> 0:11:21.520 slash one year and one day, his mum came to 0:11:21.559 --> 0:11:24.439 my house unannounced and tried to push through the door 0:11:24.520 --> 0:11:27.040 with her Bible when I said I didn't want to 0:11:27.080 --> 0:11:31.640 see her, but she stood outside for two hours praying 0:11:31.720 --> 0:11:35.400 for me, aka yelling out Bible verses and declaring that 0:11:35.600 --> 0:11:38.960 evil would be gone from me. And I wouldn't leave 0:11:39.040 --> 0:11:42.600 her son. Mind you, I lived in a townhouse complex. 0:11:42.760 --> 0:11:45.320 All my neighbors heard all of this nonsense, but it 0:11:45.400 --> 0:11:47.079 didn't stop her. 0:11:48.920 --> 0:11:49.760 I'm confused. 0:11:50.760 --> 0:11:54.480 Why is she the one that's the mum's coming out 0:11:54.480 --> 0:11:56.040 with the Bible saying that evil? 0:11:56.200 --> 0:11:59.079 Wouldn't you do that to the son? Your son has 0:11:59.160 --> 0:11:59.840 been none fake? 0:12:00.400 --> 0:12:02.520 These crazy boy mums who think that their sons can 0:12:02.600 --> 0:12:03.200 do no wrong. 0:12:03.880 --> 0:12:04.760 You are one of those. 0:12:05.200 --> 0:12:07.240 No, But I'm I'm sorry. If my son did that, 0:12:07.280 --> 0:12:09.600 I would absolutely reprimand him and say what you've done 0:12:09.640 --> 0:12:12.679 is vile. How dare you treat a woman like this? 0:12:13.920 --> 0:12:14.280 Amen? 0:12:14.679 --> 0:12:16.000 Yes, that's disgusting. 0:12:16.280 --> 0:12:18.680 You wouldn't go and knock on the missus door with 0:12:18.720 --> 0:12:23.440 the Bible yell at no, No, I wouldn't have guess 0:12:23.480 --> 0:12:24.200 that I would not. 0:12:24.400 --> 0:12:27.880 Absolutely, that's just insane to me, Like, genuinely, I genuinely 0:12:27.880 --> 0:12:29.800 think that's insane. Yeah, you're insane. 0:12:29.840 --> 0:12:31.960 Seems odd to me that that parents can be so 0:12:32.120 --> 0:12:35.560 blinded by their kids behavior, Like they say, love, unconditional 0:12:35.600 --> 0:12:37.280 love and stuff, And it's fine for you to continue 0:12:37.320 --> 0:12:40.040 loving your son, but you can still reprimand him for 0:12:40.120 --> 0:12:42.200 shit behavior and tell him that what he's doing is 0:12:42.280 --> 0:12:46.520 not okay. Perhaps focus your energy of yes, you know, 0:12:46.760 --> 0:12:49.200 turning him back to the Lord or your religion and 0:12:49.200 --> 0:12:51.319 saying there's not adhering to the values that perhaps you 0:12:51.440 --> 0:12:54.000 subscribe to. But yeah, pointing the finger at her and 0:12:54.679 --> 0:12:57.320 trying to say that she can't leave him because it's 0:12:57.360 --> 0:12:59.040 not Again, Yeah, I don't know. It just seems like 0:12:59.120 --> 0:12:59.560 this is how. 0:12:59.480 --> 0:13:03.559 People raise psychopaths is by enabling absolutely everything they've always done, 0:13:03.600 --> 0:13:05.880 because in your eyes, they're perfect, and it's not them, 0:13:05.920 --> 0:13:07.840 It can never be them. It's always someone else who's 0:13:07.880 --> 0:13:10.520 the problem. That's how you raise a literal psychopath who 0:13:10.559 --> 0:13:12.640 thinks that they're untouchable, that they can do anything in 0:13:12.640 --> 0:13:13.160 this world. 0:13:13.840 --> 0:13:16.199 Yeah, it's not horrific, not a good lesson to teach, 0:13:16.320 --> 0:13:19.360 And yeah, I'm glad you got out of that, and says. 0:13:19.400 --> 0:13:21.320 It's low key abusive. I would call the cops. 0:13:21.480 --> 0:13:25.679 Sorry, I cannot imagine as well when she said used 0:13:25.679 --> 0:13:28.400 to be Christian got married at nineteen. Actually, I used 0:13:28.400 --> 0:13:31.600 to work with a few Christian dudes who were the same, like, 0:13:31.679 --> 0:13:33.800 no sex performed marriage, and they were so keen to 0:13:33.800 --> 0:13:36.200 get married early because it meant that they could sleep 0:13:36.200 --> 0:13:36.920 with their partner stuff. 0:13:36.920 --> 0:13:38.439 And I always just thought that was such. 0:13:38.240 --> 0:13:42.360 A you know, like, I understand different cultures do things 0:13:42.400 --> 0:13:45.400 differently in different religions, but I was like, I can't 0:13:45.440 --> 0:13:50.600 imagine being married at nineteen like such a kid, still, 0:13:50.679 --> 0:13:54.520 like such a baby, no very experience, and to feel 0:13:54.520 --> 0:13:56.839 like you have to lock yourself into a partner for 0:13:56.960 --> 0:14:01.440 life so that you can access sexual it just seems 0:14:01.840 --> 0:14:07.200 very strange to someone who's not religious. Yes, but yeah, 0:14:07.440 --> 0:14:10.960 like nineteen having all this happen, Oh my gosh, I 0:14:11.040 --> 0:14:14.000 can't even fathom that. So poor thing. Nineteen's very young, 0:14:14.360 --> 0:14:14.719 poor thing. 0:14:14.760 --> 0:14:16.840 I look back at nineteen and you think you know everything, 0:14:16.880 --> 0:14:19.920 and then you get to thirty and you're like, wow, 0:14:20.280 --> 0:14:22.760 I knew nothing, Like I feel like I was still 0:14:22.760 --> 0:14:23.520 in high school then. 0:14:23.720 --> 0:14:26.160 I still feel like I don't know much, all right. 0:14:26.160 --> 0:14:30.120 Next story, my friend's mum fed his six month old 0:14:30.200 --> 0:14:33.520 Pavlova after being told by his wife over five times 0:14:33.560 --> 0:14:35.360 to not give it to him as it had raw 0:14:35.400 --> 0:14:38.040 egg white in it and they hadn't introduced that yet. 0:14:38.640 --> 0:14:41.320 She did it when they weren't looking, and within one 0:14:41.400 --> 0:14:45.280 minute the baby had hives, labored breathing and was gasping 0:14:45.320 --> 0:14:48.480 for air. They called the ambulance but then decided to 0:14:48.560 --> 0:14:50.840 drive to emergency and the baby had to go on 0:14:50.880 --> 0:14:53.920 a ventilator and was in hospital for a week and 0:14:54.040 --> 0:14:56.640 is now allergic to egg. On top of that, his 0:14:56.760 --> 0:14:59.240 mum tried to defend herself by saying that it was 0:14:59.240 --> 0:15:02.600 actually because the son was formula fed and not breastfed 0:15:02.600 --> 0:15:05.680 that he had an allergic reaction. So they obviously don't 0:15:05.720 --> 0:15:08.480 talk anymore. Loll. That was six years ago. 0:15:08.680 --> 0:15:12.720 Yeah, valid, honestly valid outcome, and really really effed up 0:15:12.760 --> 0:15:15.800 and really sad that this is how this has ended, 0:15:16.280 --> 0:15:21.800 because yeah, you've obviously endangered your grandchild's life by outright 0:15:21.880 --> 0:15:24.920 ignoring what the parent has said to you, which is 0:15:25.000 --> 0:15:28.120 obviously important information. It's not just like I don't want 0:15:28.160 --> 0:15:30.000 them to have sugar because it's bad for them. It's like, no, 0:15:30.040 --> 0:15:32.680 it's raw egg. We haven't introduced that allergen and you're 0:15:32.720 --> 0:15:34.240 not supposed to do that in that way. 0:15:34.440 --> 0:15:36.600 And also perhaps the path could have been different after 0:15:36.640 --> 0:15:39.280 the fact if she was like, I am so terribly sorry. 0:15:39.280 --> 0:15:40.160 I didn't think. 0:15:39.960 --> 0:15:44.000 About that, like I totally understand now like the risks 0:15:44.040 --> 0:15:46.520 and I'm so so sorry, and perhaps you could have 0:15:46.560 --> 0:15:49.280 been remorseful. But to then go, I'm the formula. It's 0:15:49.280 --> 0:15:51.520 not my fault, it's and you're trying to like gaslight 0:15:51.560 --> 0:15:54.560 someone into, you know, saying that it's it's the decisions 0:15:54.560 --> 0:15:56.640 that they've made that have made the baby like this. 0:15:56.720 --> 0:16:00.560 It's just like you genuinely made me imagine how this 0:16:00.720 --> 0:16:03.680 would totally tinish relationship and you wouldn't want your in 0:16:03.760 --> 0:16:06.840 law around if they were so can't trust them, so disrespectful, 0:16:06.880 --> 0:16:08.960 you don't trust them. And then they were not remorseful 0:16:09.000 --> 0:16:11.960 for you know, potentially getting close to killing your child. 0:16:12.080 --> 0:16:15.760 So yeah, that's a question for someone not knowledgeable on 0:16:15.800 --> 0:16:19.760 the subject of children. Yes, sir, but if when when 0:16:20.200 --> 0:16:22.760 they said they're now allergic to egg is because if 0:16:22.760 --> 0:16:26.160 you introduce it to early, like you can become allergic 0:16:26.280 --> 0:16:28.440 to it. Or is it just like you don't want 0:16:28.440 --> 0:16:30.200 to introduce things that early because they could. 0:16:30.200 --> 0:16:32.840 It's actually the opposite. The earlier you introduce something, the 0:16:33.000 --> 0:16:35.240 more likely they are to not be allergic to it. 0:16:35.320 --> 0:16:38.440 Okay, But obviously there are ways to introduce allergens that 0:16:38.480 --> 0:16:41.800 are safer, okay, And it's also certain things that are 0:16:41.840 --> 0:16:44.680 higher risk of being an allergen you're supposed to. Egg 0:16:44.720 --> 0:16:48.640 is definitely a minuscule amount, oh okay. For example, you 0:16:48.680 --> 0:16:51.720 would try slightly less cooked egg. Over a certain amount 0:16:51.720 --> 0:16:53.640 of time, you cook it less and less and less, 0:16:53.640 --> 0:16:54.280 do you know what I mean? 0:16:54.320 --> 0:16:57.320 So they get used to it, like sloppy scrambled egg, Yeah, 0:16:57.480 --> 0:16:59.240 you know what I mean, raw egg, You know what 0:16:59.280 --> 0:17:03.200 I mean. But then it's slightly cooked but still has 0:17:03.240 --> 0:17:04.560 a raw element, yes, you know. 0:17:04.840 --> 0:17:07.159 So like there's there's that way of doing it versus 0:17:07.200 --> 0:17:09.840 like straight up just raw egg in a path where 0:17:09.880 --> 0:17:13.439 you've gone to the absolute extreme of the allergen, and 0:17:13.480 --> 0:17:15.680 if the child is allergic, which in this case they are, 0:17:15.840 --> 0:17:18.560 they've had a very bad reaction to it, which can 0:17:18.680 --> 0:17:23.080 also cause long term. 0:17:22.119 --> 0:17:24.520 But if it was in a state where it was 0:17:24.720 --> 0:17:27.359 just scrambled and there was no rawness to it. 0:17:27.520 --> 0:17:29.360 They still might have been allergic, but the reaction might 0:17:29.359 --> 0:17:33.320 not have been like for example, for example, possibly Fleger 0:17:33.400 --> 0:17:35.960 can eat cooked egg, but he's allergic. 0:17:35.680 --> 0:17:38.919 To raw or was allergic to raw not anymore, not anymore. 0:17:38.960 --> 0:17:41.000 But we only found that out because we went to 0:17:41.040 --> 0:17:43.920 a cafe one time and they underdid the exhibit. You 0:17:43.920 --> 0:17:45.600 know how cafes do it still like it ever so 0:17:45.720 --> 0:17:48.200 slightly wet, you know that wet. And we gave him, 0:17:48.280 --> 0:17:50.639 We gave him the egg, and he came up with 0:17:50.640 --> 0:17:52.080 all these hives. And we were trying to figure it 0:17:52.119 --> 0:17:54.679 out because at home we cooked the eggs well. But 0:17:55.280 --> 0:17:57.520 that being said, like when you know your kids any things, 0:17:57.560 --> 0:17:59.280 like I was also allergic to peanuts, Like we carry 0:17:59.320 --> 0:18:00.800 on an EpiPen, you know, for emergent. 0:18:00.840 --> 0:18:03.199 I think I was like to just intolerant as a child, 0:18:03.320 --> 0:18:06.080 like a baby, and then I. 0:18:05.680 --> 0:18:06.880 Grow out of a lot of allergies. 0:18:06.880 --> 0:18:08.120 Now it's fine, Yeah, you. 0:18:08.040 --> 0:18:11.119 Grow out of a lot of allergens. So just just 0:18:11.160 --> 0:18:11.840 ask the questions. 0:18:11.840 --> 0:18:13.200 I thought, there's probably people listening to being like I 0:18:13.240 --> 0:18:16.320 don't understand. Yes, yeah, but there's also there's also like 0:18:16.400 --> 0:18:19.280 some people take allergy testing like really seriously to the 0:18:19.359 --> 0:18:22.159 point where I've actually had friends who've done it in 0:18:22.160 --> 0:18:24.959 the car park of hospitals. So they literally sit with 0:18:25.000 --> 0:18:28.560 their child so there emergency, they can be there in 0:18:28.560 --> 0:18:30.760 one minute, because you know, if if your baby does 0:18:30.840 --> 0:18:33.800 have labored breathing or struggling to breathe, like you don't 0:18:33.800 --> 0:18:34.760 want to get in the car if you have a 0:18:34.800 --> 0:18:37.000 fifteen minute drive ahead of you, you know, So they 0:18:37.040 --> 0:18:39.679 go to a car park at the hospital, do the 0:18:39.720 --> 0:18:42.359 allergens anytime they want to do it, and then if nothing. 0:18:42.240 --> 0:18:43.119 Happens, they drive home. 0:18:43.840 --> 0:18:46.400 So like, that's the severity that some people will take this, 0:18:46.520 --> 0:18:48.600 you know, which is understandable because you know it's your 0:18:48.600 --> 0:18:51.879 little pride and joy, and if my kid had labored breathing, 0:18:51.920 --> 0:18:53.679 oh my god, it would scare the bejeebas out of me. 0:18:53.760 --> 0:18:57.640