1
00:00:05,921 --> 00:00:14,281
Speaker 1: Appogiae production. I think triggers is a really cool conversation

2
00:00:14,361 --> 00:00:17,881
Speaker 1: to have around relationships, because no matter who you're with,

3
00:00:18,041 --> 00:00:21,161
Speaker 1: you're going to get triggered about something. And there's obviously

4
00:00:21,161 --> 00:00:22,800
Speaker 1: a lot of unpack as to where those triggers have

5
00:00:22,841 --> 00:00:25,121
Speaker 1: come from. So maybe I'll start off with my biggest trigger,

6
00:00:25,561 --> 00:00:27,921
Speaker 1: where it came from, and how it's affected Steve and

7
00:00:27,961 --> 00:00:29,881
Speaker 1: I and the hardship we've had to go through to

8
00:00:29,921 --> 00:00:32,681
Speaker 1: work through it. Okay, so my biggest trigger is alcohol.

9
00:00:33,361 --> 00:00:35,400
Speaker 1: It's no news to anyone that I'm not a drinker.

10
00:00:35,441 --> 00:00:37,841
Speaker 1: I don't like alcohol. I really don't see any positives

11
00:00:37,840 --> 00:00:41,281
Speaker 1: in it. I've only ever had traumatic events and not

12
00:00:41,400 --> 00:00:43,840
Speaker 1: nice times with alcohol. I find it very disconnecting. I

13
00:00:43,881 --> 00:00:46,080
Speaker 1: find it very bad for the health. I don't feel

14
00:00:46,120 --> 00:00:47,921
Speaker 1: good on it. I don't like being around people that

15
00:00:47,961 --> 00:00:50,080
Speaker 1: are really intoxicated. I don't know when people have like

16
00:00:50,120 --> 00:00:52,441
Speaker 1: a drinker too, When people get drunk, I'm like, ooh,

17
00:00:52,561 --> 00:00:54,240
Speaker 1: it's just not my vibe and energy I like to

18
00:00:54,241 --> 00:00:57,521
Speaker 1: be around. But growing up, my stepfather was a massive

19
00:00:57,521 --> 00:01:00,121
Speaker 1: alcoholic and he was very abusive. My mum was also

20
00:01:00,200 --> 00:01:02,441
Speaker 1: quite a heavy drinker. I think just to like numb

21
00:01:02,441 --> 00:01:04,241
Speaker 1: out and just try and survive and get through each night,

22
00:01:04,321 --> 00:01:06,761
Speaker 1: use it to relax whatever. That my Yeah, my stepdad

23
00:01:06,840 --> 00:01:08,840
Speaker 1: was super abusive, Like I just remember him throwing things

24
00:01:08,881 --> 00:01:11,401
Speaker 1: and hitting us and just yelling all the time, and

25
00:01:11,441 --> 00:01:13,361
Speaker 1: it just was not a good time. It was like

26
00:01:13,360 --> 00:01:16,321
Speaker 1: that sober, but then drinking was like a whole new level.

27
00:01:16,560 --> 00:01:16,920
Speaker 2: Yeah.

28
00:01:16,961 --> 00:01:18,721
Speaker 1: And then like a lot of my high school girlfriends

29
00:01:18,721 --> 00:01:20,641
Speaker 1: were very big drinkers, and I was always one looking

30
00:01:20,681 --> 00:01:22,401
Speaker 1: after them and like holding their hair back. And I

31
00:01:22,441 --> 00:01:24,280
Speaker 1: know that, like people think that's normal and that's like

32
00:01:24,321 --> 00:01:26,761
Speaker 1: what happens when you're younger, but I don't know. I

33
00:01:26,801 --> 00:01:28,560
Speaker 1: just found that really hard to watch my friends just

34
00:01:28,601 --> 00:01:31,121
Speaker 1: get so wasted. Yeah, And I just felt like they

35
00:01:31,161 --> 00:01:33,681
Speaker 1: had no love for themselves and for their bodies. It

36
00:01:33,761 --> 00:01:35,681
Speaker 1: just wasn't something I went down. So when I went

37
00:01:35,681 --> 00:01:38,161
Speaker 1: with Steve, I definitely like went out and drank and

38
00:01:38,161 --> 00:01:40,200
Speaker 1: stuff and got drunk whatever. I'm not saying I've never drank,

39
00:01:40,241 --> 00:01:42,761
Speaker 1: Like plenty of times I've been drunk or whatever. But

40
00:01:42,801 --> 00:01:44,521
Speaker 1: with him, for the first couple of years, it was

41
00:01:44,601 --> 00:01:46,761
Speaker 1: kind of fun. Like we were young, went out clubbing,

42
00:01:46,961 --> 00:01:48,801
Speaker 1: had our fun, blah blah blah, went to festivals, all

43
00:01:48,801 --> 00:01:51,761
Speaker 1: the time. It was cool. But then as I got

44
00:01:51,801 --> 00:01:54,801
Speaker 1: a bit older and got a bit more connected to myself,

45
00:01:55,161 --> 00:01:57,241
Speaker 1: and then just saw how we were both showing up

46
00:01:57,281 --> 00:01:59,641
Speaker 1: when we were not only drinking but hungover, and like

47
00:01:59,641 --> 00:02:02,041
Speaker 1: the weeks following. It wasn't just that day, You're in

48
00:02:02,081 --> 00:02:03,761
Speaker 1: a lower state for the week, Like we weren't showing

49
00:02:03,841 --> 00:02:06,240
Speaker 1: up being the best versions of ourselves. I just found

50
00:02:06,281 --> 00:02:08,321
Speaker 1: like each time we were drinking, we would be fighting

51
00:02:08,721 --> 00:02:12,001
Speaker 1: yeah okay, over like something small, something big, and it

52
00:02:12,001 --> 00:02:14,401
Speaker 1: would just like ruin the whole week. Yeah, And I

53
00:02:14,441 --> 00:02:16,401
Speaker 1: don't think we had the tools to kind of work

54
00:02:16,481 --> 00:02:18,401
Speaker 1: through it and move through it quick either, So it

55
00:02:18,441 --> 00:02:20,601
Speaker 1: was always like a long, dragged out thing.

56
00:02:20,921 --> 00:02:21,001
Speaker 3: Ye.

57
00:02:21,561 --> 00:02:24,201
Speaker 1: And Steve has never had like an addiction to alcohol whatever,

58
00:02:24,281 --> 00:02:26,881
Speaker 1: but for him it was the complete opposite growing up,

59
00:02:26,921 --> 00:02:28,601
Speaker 1: He's only had positive experience with the alcohol. It was

60
00:02:28,601 --> 00:02:30,520
Speaker 1: always fun for him. Yeah, there was never any trauma.

61
00:02:30,561 --> 00:02:32,921
Speaker 1: There's never any fights with ex girlfriends. It was always

62
00:02:32,921 --> 00:02:34,960
Speaker 1: just like fun and how he connects with the boys,

63
00:02:35,001 --> 00:02:38,201
Speaker 1: And in Australian culture that's very common, like men connect

64
00:02:38,240 --> 00:02:41,481
Speaker 1: through drinking and and like hanging out. Yeah, when I

65
00:02:41,601 --> 00:02:43,441
Speaker 1: was really like, I don't like drinking. I don't like

66
00:02:43,481 --> 00:02:45,281
Speaker 1: you drinking. I don't like how we are we're together

67
00:02:45,321 --> 00:02:49,001
Speaker 1: and drinking. There was quite a bit of resistance, and

68
00:02:49,041 --> 00:02:50,921
Speaker 1: then over the years it just got more and more

69
00:02:50,921 --> 00:02:52,761
Speaker 1: that I just really didn't want to be around alcohol

70
00:02:53,081 --> 00:02:55,520
Speaker 1: when I'm sober and he's drinking. He's not even bad

71
00:02:55,520 --> 00:02:58,321
Speaker 1: when he drinks. He's not rude, he's not aggressive, he's

72
00:02:58,361 --> 00:03:02,321
Speaker 1: not anything bad quote unquote, but he's just not Steve.

73
00:03:02,881 --> 00:03:03,800
Speaker 2: And isn't it hard?

74
00:03:03,841 --> 00:03:06,441
Speaker 3: Because for him it's like this fun, yeah thing that

75
00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:08,520
Speaker 3: really enjoys, so he can let his hand out.

76
00:03:08,520 --> 00:03:10,641
Speaker 1: And for you, it's just like traumatizing.

77
00:03:11,441 --> 00:03:13,361
Speaker 3: It brings you back to the worst time of your life,

78
00:03:13,401 --> 00:03:15,121
Speaker 3: and for him it's like reliving the best times in

79
00:03:15,121 --> 00:03:15,601
Speaker 3: his life.

80
00:03:15,680 --> 00:03:19,840
Speaker 1: Yeah. So it's like there's so much to unpack there,

81
00:03:19,841 --> 00:03:22,321
Speaker 1: and we've had so much like cool therapy on our

82
00:03:22,361 --> 00:03:25,681
Speaker 1: own and separately and together. And you know, for me,

83
00:03:25,921 --> 00:03:27,921
Speaker 1: I knew that a lot of this was my own triggers.

84
00:03:28,401 --> 00:03:31,001
Speaker 1: But I also knew that as I've gotten older, like

85
00:03:31,121 --> 00:03:33,201
Speaker 1: I really don't like being around alcohol, and that's okay,

86
00:03:33,401 --> 00:03:36,041
Speaker 1: it is, and that's what I value. And you know,

87
00:03:36,121 --> 00:03:38,121
Speaker 1: over the last couple of years, he's really realized he

88
00:03:38,161 --> 00:03:40,561
Speaker 1: doesn't value it either. And all the things that he

89
00:03:40,641 --> 00:03:44,841
Speaker 1: values in life energy, sleep, love and connection, me feeling safe,

90
00:03:44,921 --> 00:03:48,161
Speaker 1: my nervous system, being a really good dad, having energy,

91
00:03:48,601 --> 00:03:51,201
Speaker 1: looking after his body, like, that's what things he values

92
00:03:51,241 --> 00:03:53,321
Speaker 1: and alcohol doesn't match that. So for the last like

93
00:03:53,521 --> 00:03:55,281
Speaker 1: year and a half, he's probably drank and I'm being

94
00:03:55,361 --> 00:03:58,121
Speaker 1: drank by having like two drinks maybe like three or

95
00:03:58,121 --> 00:04:00,481
Speaker 1: four times. Yeah, because it's really not a part of

96
00:04:00,481 --> 00:04:03,081
Speaker 1: his life anymore, and it is hard for him, I think,

97
00:04:03,081 --> 00:04:05,321
Speaker 1: because like obviously boys do connect with drinking, a lot

98
00:04:05,361 --> 00:04:07,161
Speaker 1: of men do, and he doesn't really go out and

99
00:04:07,161 --> 00:04:09,441
Speaker 1: do that stuff anymore. But it's brought us so much

100
00:04:09,441 --> 00:04:11,841
Speaker 1: more closer and so much more connected, and it's been

101
00:04:11,881 --> 00:04:14,961
Speaker 1: really healing for me also to have the safe space

102
00:04:15,041 --> 00:04:18,841
Speaker 1: to unpack that trigger from my childhood and from what

103
00:04:18,921 --> 00:04:20,801
Speaker 1: comes up for me because he's holding it there and

104
00:04:20,921 --> 00:04:22,401
Speaker 1: he's there with me through it. Yep.

105
00:04:22,721 --> 00:04:25,481
Speaker 2: So how's Steve going with his friendships?

106
00:04:25,521 --> 00:04:28,001
Speaker 3: Because I feel like so when Kurt was boxing, he

107
00:04:28,001 --> 00:04:30,721
Speaker 3: stopped drinking for like six months to a year, and

108
00:04:30,761 --> 00:04:32,321
Speaker 3: he said it really highlighted to his.

109
00:04:32,281 --> 00:04:34,080
Speaker 2: True friends work because a lot of his friends just

110
00:04:34,081 --> 00:04:34,361
Speaker 2: want to.

111
00:04:34,320 --> 00:04:36,321
Speaker 3: Go out and get shit faced, Like, has Steve noticed

112
00:04:36,320 --> 00:04:37,721
Speaker 3: a bit of a shift with that look?

113
00:04:37,721 --> 00:04:39,880
Speaker 1: He always says like he still loves his friends whatever,

114
00:04:39,961 --> 00:04:42,121
Speaker 1: but there isn't a lot of common ground. Yeah, So

115
00:04:42,121 --> 00:04:43,961
Speaker 1: whether they don't have kids or whether they do just

116
00:04:44,001 --> 00:04:45,681
Speaker 1: like to go out and continue drinking. Like, there's just

117
00:04:45,801 --> 00:04:47,801
Speaker 1: a lot of common ground, and he is good. It's

118
00:04:47,841 --> 00:04:49,880
Speaker 1: just like to be honest, like, even if they weren't drinking,

119
00:04:49,921 --> 00:04:51,041
Speaker 1: I was gonna be bit home with my family on

120
00:04:51,081 --> 00:04:51,361
Speaker 1: the weekend.

121
00:04:51,401 --> 00:04:53,201
Speaker 2: Oh that's nice because I'm just a homebody.

122
00:04:53,281 --> 00:04:55,321
Speaker 1: Like, because I'm always encouraging him, like go out and

123
00:04:55,320 --> 00:04:57,641
Speaker 1: see your friends doing something, but he's like, actually want

124
00:04:57,641 --> 00:04:59,721
Speaker 1: to be here with you guys. So it's been really

125
00:04:59,801 --> 00:05:01,760
Speaker 1: nice journey for us. But there's definitely been some really

126
00:05:01,801 --> 00:05:03,961
Speaker 1: hard times where I've been super triggered and Steve's been

127
00:05:04,001 --> 00:05:06,841
Speaker 1: drinking more than what feels nice to me, and we've

128
00:05:06,841 --> 00:05:08,960
Speaker 1: had to work through that and really talk about things

129
00:05:09,001 --> 00:05:12,321
Speaker 1: and go through some hard times. But like anything, I'm

130
00:05:12,361 --> 00:05:13,921
Speaker 1: just so grateful for it because every time there's a

131
00:05:13,921 --> 00:05:16,281
Speaker 1: hard time, like you know, whether we got help professionally

132
00:05:16,361 --> 00:05:17,841
Speaker 1: or we work through it together, it just makes us

133
00:05:17,880 --> 00:05:20,041
Speaker 1: so much stronger. Yeah, and I come out feeling so

134
00:05:20,121 --> 00:05:23,281
Speaker 1: much more connected and heard and safe and just like

135
00:05:23,401 --> 00:05:24,201
Speaker 1: more in love with him.

136
00:05:24,361 --> 00:05:25,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, which is really cool.

137
00:05:25,481 --> 00:05:28,401
Speaker 1: Nice. So, but yeah, that was definitely my biggest trigger.

138
00:05:28,561 --> 00:05:30,481
Speaker 1: And I think because I didn't heal it with my

139
00:05:30,521 --> 00:05:32,601
Speaker 1: stepdad that's why it showed up on this relationship too.

140
00:05:32,641 --> 00:05:35,281
Speaker 1: It's like that, you know, life keeps teaching you the

141
00:05:35,281 --> 00:05:36,561
Speaker 1: same lessons until you heal it.

142
00:05:36,601 --> 00:05:39,601
Speaker 3: Yeap, Like, well, isn't it funny one of my like, well,

143
00:05:39,601 --> 00:05:41,721
Speaker 3: my biggest trigger is also the same sort of thing,

144
00:05:41,761 --> 00:05:43,681
Speaker 3: Like it all stems from something.

145
00:05:43,721 --> 00:05:47,200
Speaker 1: Of course I can experience. Hey, totally don't heal it.

146
00:05:47,201 --> 00:05:48,841
Speaker 1: It's just going to keep showing up in two ways.

147
00:05:48,841 --> 00:05:50,640
Speaker 1: And say, like say if I was to break up

148
00:05:50,641 --> 00:05:52,561
Speaker 1: with Steve because you know, we were fighting and drinking whatever,

149
00:05:52,841 --> 00:05:54,841
Speaker 1: If I didn't heal that, the next person the same,

150
00:05:54,880 --> 00:05:56,241
Speaker 1: she's going to come up in a different way, you

151
00:05:56,281 --> 00:05:58,281
Speaker 1: know what I mean, Like, it's the responsibility to heal that,

152
00:05:58,921 --> 00:06:00,521
Speaker 1: and you can still communicate what you want and what

153
00:06:00,561 --> 00:06:02,161
Speaker 1: you don't want, Like I wouldn't be with someone now

154
00:06:02,201 --> 00:06:03,881
Speaker 1: if they were a heavy drinker, if that was Steve

155
00:06:04,001 --> 00:06:05,721
Speaker 1: or someone else. And I've said that him as well,

156
00:06:05,761 --> 00:06:07,640
Speaker 1: Like if you ever wanted to go back into being

157
00:06:07,641 --> 00:06:09,640
Speaker 1: a heavy drinker. I don't judge you for it, like,

158
00:06:09,681 --> 00:06:11,161
Speaker 1: go live your life, but it's just not how I.

159
00:06:11,121 --> 00:06:11,521
Speaker 2: Want to live.

160
00:06:11,561 --> 00:06:15,320
Speaker 1: So we're not aligned anymore. But you know, having those conversations.

161
00:06:14,921 --> 00:06:16,801
Speaker 2: Holding your boundaries. You can still have some drinks, you

162
00:06:16,801 --> 00:06:18,681
Speaker 2: can still do a thing, but I just don't want someone.

163
00:06:18,721 --> 00:06:21,321
Speaker 1: But it made him go, yeah, oh shit, okay, what

164
00:06:21,361 --> 00:06:23,401
Speaker 1: do I actually value? Is this even aligned with me?

165
00:06:23,440 --> 00:06:25,320
Speaker 1: And he's like, fuck, I actually don't want to do

166
00:06:25,361 --> 00:06:27,841
Speaker 1: it anymore. But yeah, for years it was great experience

167
00:06:27,841 --> 00:06:31,721
Speaker 1: and fun whatever. That's probably my biggest trigger and lowest

168
00:06:31,801 --> 00:06:33,081
Speaker 1: times have come from alcohol.

169
00:06:33,281 --> 00:06:37,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, so my biggest trigger would be trust. Oh okay,

170
00:06:38,081 --> 00:06:39,681
Speaker 2: so growing.

171
00:06:39,401 --> 00:06:41,961
Speaker 3: Up I feel like probably my trust was broken a lot.

172
00:06:42,081 --> 00:06:45,161
Speaker 3: I feel like there's a lot of empty promises. Definitely

173
00:06:45,161 --> 00:06:47,440
Speaker 3: our biggest fight. So say, for example, if we went

174
00:06:47,481 --> 00:06:49,320
Speaker 3: out one night and I said to like, oh, babe,

175
00:06:49,320 --> 00:06:51,080
Speaker 3: how many beers if you had? When I came home

176
00:06:51,320 --> 00:06:53,601
Speaker 3: and he told me had too, but he'd actually had six.

177
00:06:57,481 --> 00:07:00,001
Speaker 1: When a man says three beers, it's like actually six,

178
00:07:00,041 --> 00:07:00,640
Speaker 1: it's like double.

179
00:07:00,761 --> 00:07:04,201
Speaker 3: That's undehiny little perspective, and that's this still to this day,

180
00:07:04,401 --> 00:07:08,201
Speaker 3: trust is such a huge value for me, so huge

181
00:07:08,201 --> 00:07:10,041
Speaker 3: and at the start, so Kurt says to me, now,

182
00:07:10,081 --> 00:07:12,481
Speaker 3: he's like, I wish all those years ago, I just

183
00:07:12,561 --> 00:07:14,081
Speaker 3: knew well that she was tell the truth.

184
00:07:14,121 --> 00:07:16,001
Speaker 2: He goes, I was worried. I was scared that you

185
00:07:16,041 --> 00:07:17,961
Speaker 2: were gone. He's like, now I can tell you anything

186
00:07:18,561 --> 00:07:19,801
Speaker 2: and he knows he won't get in trouble.

187
00:07:19,881 --> 00:07:20,041
Speaker 1: Yeah.

188
00:07:20,041 --> 00:07:22,001
Speaker 2: I might not agree with it, but it's not going

189
00:07:22,041 --> 00:07:22,281
Speaker 2: to be.

190
00:07:22,321 --> 00:07:24,401
Speaker 1: But if you're upset for that moment, totally, it's like,

191
00:07:24,481 --> 00:07:26,161
Speaker 1: let me be grumpy for that day and then but

192
00:07:26,161 --> 00:07:27,840
Speaker 1: if you lie to me, it's like then it's.

193
00:07:27,881 --> 00:07:31,041
Speaker 2: The chance is the trust is so massive.

194
00:07:31,161 --> 00:07:33,401
Speaker 3: So yeah, back in the day, it was kind of

195
00:07:33,481 --> 00:07:36,441
Speaker 3: like that, like him just lying to me about like

196
00:07:36,641 --> 00:07:38,721
Speaker 3: nights out with the boys and stuff like that, which

197
00:07:38,841 --> 00:07:39,481
Speaker 3: we were so young.

198
00:07:39,481 --> 00:07:41,361
Speaker 2: We've been together since we were so young. That's gonna happen.

199
00:07:41,761 --> 00:07:45,881
Speaker 3: But I feel like our lowest points have been around trust.

200
00:07:45,921 --> 00:07:48,561
Speaker 3: I feel like that is such a huge trigger for me.

201
00:07:49,321 --> 00:07:50,721
Speaker 3: I feel like when we were younger, we went through

202
00:07:50,761 --> 00:07:53,561
Speaker 3: a phase where I was very codependent on him, and

203
00:07:53,641 --> 00:07:56,481
Speaker 3: I feel like that's when the trust was being broken

204
00:07:56,521 --> 00:07:58,601
Speaker 3: because I was nearly like coming across needy.

205
00:07:58,921 --> 00:08:00,561
Speaker 1: This was years ago and controlling of.

206
00:08:00,601 --> 00:08:04,081
Speaker 3: Most yeah, and then what happened was complete one eighty.

207
00:08:04,281 --> 00:08:06,641
Speaker 3: I feel like, not even that long ago, probably like

208
00:08:06,681 --> 00:08:09,201
Speaker 3: five years ago, Kurt kind of became really needy on me,

209
00:08:09,281 --> 00:08:11,001
Speaker 3: like maybe when we I don't know why. I think

210
00:08:11,041 --> 00:08:13,441
Speaker 3: once I became a mum, I just got really like

211
00:08:13,521 --> 00:08:16,281
Speaker 3: independent and I felt so much I.

212
00:08:16,241 --> 00:08:18,761
Speaker 2: Don't know, I just felt so much more confidence, so.

213
00:08:18,721 --> 00:08:21,481
Speaker 3: Much more sure of myself, and I think he was just,

214
00:08:21,481 --> 00:08:23,841
Speaker 3: oh my gosh, so he kind of twisted and he

215
00:08:23,921 --> 00:08:25,081
Speaker 3: became the one who was more.

216
00:08:25,401 --> 00:08:26,881
Speaker 2: Before that, we were fine, like we worked through it.

217
00:08:26,881 --> 00:08:28,681
Speaker 3: But then and I feel like when somebody is more

218
00:08:28,721 --> 00:08:30,761
Speaker 3: codependent on the other, I feel like it's just a

219
00:08:30,801 --> 00:08:32,160
Speaker 3: really yucky space to be in.

220
00:08:32,681 --> 00:08:34,201
Speaker 2: I really don't like it.

221
00:08:34,241 --> 00:08:37,601
Speaker 3: I don't like when I've ever felt needy to Kurt,

222
00:08:37,601 --> 00:08:40,681
Speaker 3: and I hate when he feels hate strong word I hate.

223
00:08:41,161 --> 00:08:44,361
Speaker 3: But I really dislike when he is needy to me

224
00:08:44,441 --> 00:08:47,841
Speaker 3: as well. I really don't like that feeling at all.

225
00:08:47,841 --> 00:08:50,561
Speaker 3: I feel like, again it's not having trust, it's going

226
00:08:50,641 --> 00:08:52,681
Speaker 3: back to that same thing though probably when I think

227
00:08:52,721 --> 00:08:54,081
Speaker 3: about it, you know, in.

228
00:08:54,081 --> 00:08:56,281
Speaker 1: Not having your own back and confidence and independence is

229
00:08:56,281 --> 00:08:57,081
Speaker 1: like really attractive.

230
00:08:57,201 --> 00:08:58,681
Speaker 2: Yes, it is sexy.

231
00:08:58,801 --> 00:08:59,441
Speaker 1: It is sexy.

232
00:08:59,521 --> 00:09:01,521
Speaker 2: Masculine independence, Yeah.

233
00:09:01,561 --> 00:09:04,441
Speaker 3: That's when it flipped, Like I know, so I feel

234
00:09:04,441 --> 00:09:06,561
Speaker 3: like that's something we've had to work on. I feel like,

235
00:09:06,841 --> 00:09:10,241
Speaker 3: you know, depending on what situation you're in, even just

236
00:09:10,441 --> 00:09:12,561
Speaker 3: like with your masculine and feminine energy.

237
00:09:12,641 --> 00:09:15,001
Speaker 1: Yeah, isn't that so important. There's something that I feel

238
00:09:15,001 --> 00:09:16,601
Speaker 1: like only in the last couple of years people are

239
00:09:16,641 --> 00:09:19,001
Speaker 1: really talking about it. I know. It's been a huge

240
00:09:19,001 --> 00:09:21,921
Speaker 1: thing that I've loved learning about and learning about myself,

241
00:09:22,001 --> 00:09:24,601
Speaker 1: learning about Steve and how the polarity when it comes together.

242
00:09:24,881 --> 00:09:26,961
Speaker 2: Very controversial topic though, have you noticed.

243
00:09:26,681 --> 00:09:30,121
Speaker 1: A little bit, Yeah, get very offended. But I never like,

244
00:09:30,281 --> 00:09:32,641
Speaker 1: I'm never putting down the feminine or the masculine. No,

245
00:09:32,961 --> 00:09:35,441
Speaker 1: both of us carry both energies, and it's really important

246
00:09:35,441 --> 00:09:38,281
Speaker 1: to honor both. But at your core, you are more

247
00:09:38,281 --> 00:09:39,881
Speaker 1: than one the other. So when you're leaning more to

248
00:09:39,921 --> 00:09:42,161
Speaker 1: the opposite, you don't feel as good. Like I'm feminine

249
00:09:42,201 --> 00:09:45,201
Speaker 1: at my core, but I feel like parenting and running

250
00:09:45,201 --> 00:09:47,641
Speaker 1: a business and dealing with finances, having deadlines like that,

251
00:09:47,681 --> 00:09:49,921
Speaker 1: it's very masculine, get shit done kind of energy, and

252
00:09:49,961 --> 00:09:52,201
Speaker 1: I love that about myself wouldn't be doing what I

253
00:09:52,241 --> 00:09:57,041
Speaker 1: am without it, that beautiful, feminine, flowy soft like I

254
00:09:57,081 --> 00:09:58,761
Speaker 1: love that and Steve loves that, and it does bring

255
00:09:58,761 --> 00:10:00,681
Speaker 1: that polarity together and it kind of lights you up

256
00:10:00,681 --> 00:10:02,241
Speaker 1: and brings us spark back in.

257
00:10:02,321 --> 00:10:03,441
Speaker 2: And it takes both people.

258
00:10:03,761 --> 00:10:06,361
Speaker 3: If one starts to become more feminine, then the other

259
00:10:06,401 --> 00:10:07,841
Speaker 3: one becomes more masculine one.

260
00:10:07,921 --> 00:10:09,161
Speaker 2: That's what we find so like.

261
00:10:09,521 --> 00:10:12,001
Speaker 3: It's such a balancing act because if one's starting to

262
00:10:12,121 --> 00:10:14,601
Speaker 3: act more one way, it just makes it worse.

263
00:10:14,841 --> 00:10:15,841
Speaker 2: It highlights it.

264
00:10:16,561 --> 00:10:18,361
Speaker 1: Yes, so agree with that.

265
00:10:18,401 --> 00:10:20,001
Speaker 2: It's so good to learn about it, though, isn't it

266
00:10:20,201 --> 00:10:21,001
Speaker 2: so interesting