Speaker 1: Hi, I'm Britney Saunders and welcome to Big Business, the
Speaker 1: place where business is far from boring. And today I'm
Speaker 1: recording on gadigal Land. Now I somehow manage to build
Speaker 1: an empire from the garage underneath my house, and I'm
Speaker 1: here to share it all with you, from the winds,
Speaker 1: the losses, the huge mistakes, the challenging times and funny
Speaker 1: moments in between. So whether you're in business already, you're
Speaker 1: not in the game at all, or if you simply
Speaker 1: just want to hear the tea or get some inspiration,
Speaker 1: this is the podcast for you. Now. Speaking of tea,
Speaker 1: I'm switching things up in this episode, and I mean,
Speaker 1: I guess you could say I'm spilling the tea on
Speaker 1: my life, but I have a lot of things to
Speaker 1: say about that, and I almost feel like this episode
Speaker 1: is going to be a form of therapy for me.
Speaker 1: And I've got producer Xander in the studio. You may
Speaker 1: jump in if you feel needed, but I'm going to
Speaker 1: be talking about my personal life. And I was inspired
Speaker 1: to make this episode by a DM that I got
Speaker 1: from someone, so I thought I would start by reading
Speaker 1: out the message. So this kind of makes sense and
Speaker 1: then we'll get into it. I'm honestly kind of scared
Speaker 1: to do this episode the nurse, So shout out to
Speaker 1: Stephanie for sending me this DM on my Big Business
Speaker 1: Podcast Instagram page. Hey, loving the podcast. I'm so curious
Speaker 1: about your upbringing. In one of your podcast episodes, you
Speaker 1: talk about how your mum was like, I don't care
Speaker 1: if you go to school or not. See if I care,
Speaker 1: And I'm just curious about if your family are also
Speaker 1: in business or what their background is. I find it
Speaker 1: interesting both ways if someone either has come from smart
Speaker 1: parents who can pass on the wisdom or even just
Speaker 1: confident parents who really instill confidence, or I also find
Speaker 1: it interesting on the other end, if someone has come
Speaker 1: from parents with not a lot of knowledge around making money,
Speaker 1: or who's like my mum and themselves are extremely not
Speaker 1: confident people and can be negative. Just would love to
Speaker 1: know more about that in an episode if it happened
Speaker 1: to fit into one. Thanks for the knowledge you're passing on.
Speaker 1: Love it. Thank you so much, Stephanie. I saw this
Speaker 1: DM and I thought that's a perfect topic for a podcast.
Speaker 1: I would love to talk about this because I often
Speaker 1: think and have thought so many times how interesting it is,
Speaker 1: how differently we are obviously all brought up, and then
Speaker 1: how that plays into, I guess essentially shaping us into
Speaker 1: who we are as adults. And I think the way
Speaker 1: that I have been brought up by both of my
Speaker 1: parents definitely and obviously has shaped me into who I
Speaker 1: am today. And I think that applies to every single
Speaker 1: one of us. We are shaped by the people who
Speaker 1: raise us. But in my case, I would say it's
Speaker 1: not in the way that you would think, and I
Speaker 1: think it's worth talking about. But in the same breath,
Speaker 1: you know, I'm always talking about personal branding and you know,
Speaker 1: making content online about your life, personal brand this and that.
Speaker 1: But over the years, especially since my YouTube days, I
Speaker 1: have become more and more private in a sense where
Speaker 1: I don't really talk about my feelings online or anything
Speaker 1: that's happening in my personal life really. You know. I
Speaker 1: share bits and bobs on my Instagram story about my
Speaker 1: house and aj but that's really all anyone ever sees.
Speaker 1: And I think as I've gotten older, I have become
Speaker 1: a little more private and mindful of the personal things
Speaker 1: that I share online. And I don't know if that's
Speaker 1: like a maturity thing or just wanting a bit of privacy.
Speaker 1: But I definitely don't see my life being a topic
Speaker 1: of gossip. But I just read that message and felt
Speaker 1: compelled to, I guess, talk about my family and the
Speaker 1: way that I was brought up and why I think
Speaker 1: I am the way that I am today. I want
Speaker 1: to start out this episode with a disclaimer or an acknowledgment,
Speaker 1: which I feel like I do in a lot of
Speaker 1: my episodes, to whoever is listening to this podcast. If
Speaker 1: you are in my life or part of my family,
Speaker 1: listen at your own risk. I'm not making this episode
Speaker 1: to shame anyone or make anyone look bad, because I
Speaker 1: know everyone has their own issues. This is essentially just
Speaker 1: me talking about my experience and my upbringing and my childhood.
Speaker 1: Because who knows who's listening to this bloody podcast, And
Speaker 1: even though this is online and it almost doesn't feel real,
Speaker 1: I'm sure there's people that know me personally that will
Speaker 1: probably listen to this. So to put it in a nutshell,
Speaker 1: I have both of my parents to thank for who
Speaker 1: I am today one hundred percent. But it's not in
Speaker 1: a positive way. And I hate to say this, but
Speaker 1: it's not in a way where and I wish it was,
Speaker 1: but I wish I could be saying I'm so thankful
Speaker 1: for the person that I am today because my parents
Speaker 1: have raised me to be who I am today. They
Speaker 1: have guided me and led me and supported me. It's
Speaker 1: actually the complete opposite. It's the other end of the scale.
Speaker 1: But I'm still thankful because hand on heart, I can
Speaker 1: say my parents have taught me everything I don't want
Speaker 1: to be in a person everything. I do want to
Speaker 1: say as well that I have a lot to be
Speaker 1: grateful for in my life. I personally think that I
Speaker 1: have the most amazing life. Even though I have things
Speaker 1: missing in my life and I feel like there's parts
Speaker 1: of my life that I wish I had better. I
Speaker 1: do have an amazing life, and I've definitely learned since
Speaker 1: I was a kid that you can pick and choose
Speaker 1: who your family are. I know some people say that
Speaker 1: you can't, like you can't pick your family. Ah, in
Speaker 1: my experience, you absolutely can. And I know that I
Speaker 1: am privilege and have this wonderful life. But I will
Speaker 1: say the one thing that I feel like I am
Speaker 1: missing in my life now and have missed my whole life.
Speaker 1: If I'm being honest or majority of it is awesome
Speaker 1: parents that I can share my successes with and the
Speaker 1: success of Fate with. I do want to address one thing,
Speaker 1: a comment that I've been getting a lot lately, and
Speaker 1: I'm not going to go into detail about it, but
Speaker 1: I have had a lot of people ask me where
Speaker 1: is Chaz Who is my mum? As a lot of
Speaker 1: you would know, she was an employee of Fate and
Speaker 1: would show up on our social media every now and
Speaker 1: then in our reels and tiktoks and stuff. I just
Speaker 1: want to put it out there. As of last year,
Speaker 1: she's no longer working at Fate, and disappointingly, she's not
Speaker 1: in my life either. And that's all I'm going to
Speaker 1: say on that. It's not the business of everyone to
Speaker 1: know what happened or anything like that. You know, you
Speaker 1: can keep things private, and that is really kind of
Speaker 1: a business and personal thing for me. I am extremely disappointed,
Speaker 1: but this isn't the first time that I have been
Speaker 1: in no contact with her, and I'm not surprised at
Speaker 1: the end of the day. And that's all I'm going
Speaker 1: to say about that, because it isn't really a topic
Speaker 1: of gossip. So let's take it back to my childhood. Now,
Speaker 1: this is stuff that I have spoken about on YouTube
Speaker 1: many many years ago. I opened up about my relationship
Speaker 1: with my dad and at the time a lot of
Speaker 1: people resonated with that. So I know not all of
Speaker 1: you would have watched that particular video from eight or
Speaker 1: nine years ago, so I feel comfortable sharing the story again.
Speaker 1: But my childhood, in a nutshell, it was my sister
Speaker 1: and I and my mom and my dad. I don't
Speaker 1: have a single happy memory of my mom and dad
Speaker 1: being together. They divorced when I was nine. All my
Speaker 1: memories are of them is a lot of fighting, a
Speaker 1: lot of being locked in my room, getting sent to
Speaker 1: my room without dinner. That's kind of my memory of
Speaker 1: them being together. I don't have one happy memory, like
Speaker 1: we never went on a holiday or anything like that.
Speaker 1: But in saying that, we did always have everything we
Speaker 1: wanted when we were kids. You know, I did dancing
Speaker 1: and had all nice clothes and beanie kids. If anyone
Speaker 1: remembers those things us to collect those. We always had
Speaker 1: nice things. But from memory, what I didn't have was
Speaker 1: any love from my parents, which I think is really important.
Speaker 1: And it was always that way, and then it was
Speaker 1: kind of you know, the kids being thrown back and
Speaker 1: forth in between mum's house and Dad's house, and Dad
Speaker 1: had us every second weekend. That was like the custody thing.
Speaker 1: Every second weekend we were at Dad's and very quickly
Speaker 1: my dad got with another woman. And I remember being
Speaker 1: really upset by that at the time because I was
Speaker 1: nine or ten and I couldn't really understand what was
Speaker 1: going on, but it was really upset by the fact
Speaker 1: that my dad had this new girlfriend, who was named Jackie.
Speaker 1: And I remember so specifically one time when Dad and
Speaker 1: Jackie were first dating. Obviously, you know, when you're in
Speaker 1: a new relationship, you try your hardest kind of thing,
Speaker 1: like it's in that honeymoon phase or whatever. And I
Speaker 1: remember my dad went and purchased Jackie a gold watch
Speaker 1: and a matching bracelet. And I remember going home to
Speaker 1: my mum balling my eyes out, saying, why did he
Speaker 1: never buy you a gold watch and matching bracelet. I
Speaker 1: just so specifically remember that, and I remember just being
Speaker 1: really upset by the fact that my dad had a
Speaker 1: new partner. I really come around to liking Jackie. She
Speaker 1: went from you know, because she had two kids as well,
Speaker 1: were the same age as my sister and I. They
Speaker 1: moved into our family home that Dad was still living in,
Speaker 1: so I was dealing with them taking our bedrooms and
Speaker 1: then we were just there every second weekend. It was
Speaker 1: an adjustment for any kid, and I went from kind
Speaker 1: of hating Jackie, being like who is this woman to
Speaker 1: growing a really close bond with her. And it was
Speaker 1: also around this time when Dad and Jackie got together
Speaker 1: that I started having issues with my dad. I thought
Speaker 1: I would also do a little bit of a trigger
Speaker 1: warning to any of you that have had issues with
Speaker 1: your parents. I'm just going to talk a little bit
Speaker 1: about my relationship with my dad. If you don't want
Speaker 1: to hear about any of that, you may want to
Speaker 1: skip ahead or not listen to the episode. But it
Speaker 1: was around, you know, the ages of ten and eleven,
Speaker 1: that my relationship with my dad became really toxic. And
Speaker 1: I think it was just to do with everything with
Speaker 1: Mum and Dad divorcing and then being split and the
Speaker 1: separate houses and then my stepmum coming into the picture.
Speaker 1: But he was always i would say, quite abusive and controlling,
Speaker 1: very emotionally manipulative, playing mind games and overall really horrible.
Speaker 1: Even as I got older, like he would still threaten
Speaker 1: to hit me, but you know, it wasn't like full
Speaker 1: on punching, but it was like whacking even though I'm
Speaker 1: like ten, eleven, twelve kind of thing. And I think
Speaker 1: as I was getting older, I was realizing that this
Speaker 1: wasn't on and you know, it would be his weekend
Speaker 1: every second weekend, but if I did something that upset him,
Speaker 1: he would blow up and drop me back to my mom's.
Speaker 1: Like he would just palm me off kind of thing,
Speaker 1: even though it was meant to be his weekend kind
Speaker 1: of thing. If he couldn't handle whatever it was that
Speaker 1: I was doing. And I wasn't a perfect child, like
Speaker 1: I was a little brat, but he would very easily
Speaker 1: just palm me off, like or he would call my
Speaker 1: mum and say, I'm fucking sick of her, where are you?
Speaker 1: I'm coming to meet you now, and he would just
Speaker 1: you know, drive like a madman to drop me back
Speaker 1: off to my mum when he couldn't star and me
Speaker 1: anymore or whatever. We went through a few stints of
Speaker 1: not talking, like going no contact so here and there.
Speaker 1: We'd go like two months of not seeing each other,
Speaker 1: three months sometimes six months over various things, and I
Speaker 1: guess Jackie was there to experience all of that with me.
Speaker 1: Like I wouldn't see Jackie and my stepbrother and stepsister
Speaker 1: for those periods of time, and then i'd eventually go back,
Speaker 1: like he'd call me up and say, oh, do you
Speaker 1: want to come back, And we'd never talk about anything
Speaker 1: that happened. It was always like we just brushed it
Speaker 1: under the rug kind of thing. And anyway, to cut
Speaker 1: a long story short, because this spanned over years. When
Speaker 1: I was fourteen, my dad had an affair on Jackie,
Speaker 1: my step mom, who by this point i'd grown really
Speaker 1: close to. I was fourteen, this is when I got
Speaker 1: my first job, and that was like the cherry on
Speaker 1: the cake was him having an affair, and it was
Speaker 1: really messy as well. He got me and my sister involved,
Speaker 1: and he took us to meet his new girlfriend and
Speaker 1: like introduced us, and I was old enough to go,
Speaker 1: this is wrong, Like he's taken us from the home
Speaker 1: that we were all living in with my step mom
Speaker 1: to meet this new woman and he was raving about her,
Speaker 1: saying how wonderful she is, and I'm fourteen, going, this
Speaker 1: is not on, Like you're married to my stepmom and
Speaker 1: you're introducing us as eleven and fourteen year olds to
Speaker 1: your new girlfriend. It was just messy. It dragged on
Speaker 1: for a couple of months, and I got really caught
Speaker 1: up in it because I was at the house that
Speaker 1: we lived in with Jackie. I might have even been
Speaker 1: living with them at the time and dealing with him
Speaker 1: like coming in, going from the other woman's house and
Speaker 1: coming home. And eventually, after all this shit like this
Speaker 1: spanned across a while, him and Jackie got a divorce
Speaker 1: and she moved out of our family home and I
Speaker 1: helped her move out. That was when my dad, I guess,
Speaker 1: abandoned me for good. I was to never hear from
Speaker 1: him again, but plot twist coming soon. I remember calling
Speaker 1: him in that first year of him not talking to
Speaker 1: me because he'd moved on with the woman that he
Speaker 1: had the affair with, and I would call him on
Speaker 1: the home phone bawling my eyes out, and he would
Speaker 1: say to me, you're not my daughter anymore. And a
Speaker 1: lot of things have stuck with me that he said
Speaker 1: to me. Even before that, when he used to be
Speaker 1: really horrible and nasty, he would say things to me
Speaker 1: like you're going to amount to nothing, You're going to
Speaker 1: be a no one and those things I've never ever forgotten.
Speaker 1: And when I think back to it, I think the
Speaker 1: reason I am the way that I am is because
Speaker 1: of a lot of what he said and did to me.
Speaker 1: In those early teenage years, I really struggled. I couldn't
Speaker 1: go to school. I've never cried so much in my
Speaker 1: life in those years, and I often think, is that
Speaker 1: why I don't really have that many emotions today. I
Speaker 1: feel like I got all my tears out fourteen fifteen sixteen,
Speaker 1: And during this time, if I'm being completely honest, I
Speaker 1: didn't feel like I had any support from my mum.
Speaker 1: It was very much if I'd be laying in bed
Speaker 1: crying about Dad not talking to me for the last
Speaker 1: two years, I'd be like, yeah, over it. He's a
Speaker 1: fucking dickhead anyway, because you know, understandably that's her ex
Speaker 1: husband that she absolutely hates. But there was never any
Speaker 1: compassion towards the fact that I'd essentially lost my dad,
Speaker 1: and I don't know, I didn't feel supported in that.
Speaker 1: My relationship with my mum also became really rocky. We
Speaker 1: fought a lot, clashed heads. I moved out with a
Speaker 1: high school boyfriend at one point when I was sixteen,
Speaker 1: without going into too much detail. As well as having
Speaker 1: a really rocky relationship with my dad in my earlier years,
Speaker 1: I also had the same kind of issues with my
Speaker 1: mum as well. We would go through periods of absolutely
Speaker 1: clashing heads. I would say, my mom and I have
Speaker 1: never had a loving relationship. I've always wished that we did,
Speaker 1: and I honestly feel like that's what I have missed
Speaker 1: my whole life. I then moved out of home when
Speaker 1: I was seventeen. I couldn't wait to move out, and
Speaker 1: I think dealing with tough relationships with my parents forced
Speaker 1: me to really become independent from a young age. And
Speaker 1: I think this is where the whole entrepreneurship thing comes
Speaker 1: into play as well. But from a really young age,
Speaker 1: I felt like I became mature and had gone through
Speaker 1: a lot of things and felt like I could be
Speaker 1: out on my own. Honestly, from a teenager, I felt
Speaker 1: like I had no other option than to just vend
Speaker 1: for myself. I never really felt supported by either of
Speaker 1: my parents or encouraged at all in anything, and I
Speaker 1: often wonder I wonder how different my life would be
Speaker 1: if I had parents that were supportive and encouraged me
Speaker 1: to do things. I always think, what have I ended
Speaker 1: up going to university and went down a completely different
Speaker 1: career path? Like who knows? Isn't it funny how the
Speaker 1: way that our family can essentially shape us into who
Speaker 1: we are, and if they were slightly different, my life
Speaker 1: could be completely different. But the one person I will
Speaker 1: say that stayed supportive to me and has been one
Speaker 1: of the most loving and mother figures in my life
Speaker 1: even up until this day is Jackie, my stepmom. So
Speaker 1: her and dad divorced when I was fourteen, and to
Speaker 1: this day she is my step mom. I know she
Speaker 1: listens to my podcast, So shout out to you, Jackie.
Speaker 1: Even though I haven't grown up with supportive parents, Jackie
Speaker 1: has been that supportive parent figure to me and still
Speaker 1: is to this day. I still call her my stepmom
Speaker 1: even though they divorced over fifteen years ago. I'm like, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's my stepmom and people like, what your step mom?
Speaker 1: So I really have her to thank for a lot.
Speaker 1: Her and I were meant to meet by my dad
Speaker 1: and her getting married and getting divorced because we've both
Speaker 1: won in that instance. Fast forward back to my whole
Speaker 1: dad situation. I really thought that that was it for
Speaker 1: him and I my whole life from the ages of
Speaker 1: fourteen up and not last year, but the year before.
Speaker 1: He called me and he said he was sorry, which
Speaker 1: I never thought would happen. I remember I was at
Speaker 1: the warehouse and my phone rang and it was him,
Speaker 1: and he said, I just want to call and I
Speaker 1: want to say I'm sorry. He did say I don't
Speaker 1: want to talk about anything that happened, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: of course, typical, typical. But I did get an apology,
Speaker 1: which I was, I guess a little relieved to hear.
Speaker 1: I didn't know how to feel at the time. I
Speaker 1: was at work, I'm like, what the fuck is going on?
Speaker 1: And he said he knows that nothing will ever be
Speaker 1: the same because we have honestly not been in each
Speaker 1: other's lives for fifteen years.
Speaker 2: Hello producers, Andy heard jumping in with a question. Do
Speaker 2: you think that your dad contacted you after all these
Speaker 2: years because he saw the success that you've had. Do
Speaker 2: you think that if you had had this success, would
Speaker 2: he have reached out the way he did.
Speaker 1: I think he would have regardless, because I guess I
Speaker 1: missed one point here. He broke up with the woman
Speaker 1: that he had the affair with, and it was after
Speaker 1: that that he contacted me. And he also has a
Speaker 1: really wonderful, nice girlfriend now and I have a feeling
Speaker 1: that she has played a huge part in him contacting me.
Speaker 1: So that was a year and a half ago that
Speaker 1: he reached out, and I've seen him maybe less than
Speaker 1: five times since then. I actually went out for dinner
Speaker 1: with him and his new partner, and I took AJ,
Speaker 1: and we were both a little bit nervous before we went,
Speaker 1: and AJ was sculling some peers because he's like, I'm
Speaker 1: meeting your dad for the first time, and you know,
Speaker 1: AJ and I've been together for like six years by
Speaker 1: this point or whatever. So AJ got a little bit
Speaker 1: pissed before we went to the dinner, and it was
Speaker 1: honestly great. We just talked about everything in life, and
Speaker 1: I had wondered if he had told his new partner
Speaker 1: that I hadn't been in contact with him for fifteen years,
Speaker 1: Like that's what I was wondering before I went to
Speaker 1: the dinner. But she did say things and was asking
Speaker 1: me questions which made me realize she knows that we
Speaker 1: haven't been in each other's lives for fifteen years, which
Speaker 1: I thought was a good thing. Does she know everything
Speaker 1: that happened? No, but that's fine. She might now if
Speaker 1: she's listening. That's why. Ah. And I'll tell you one
Speaker 1: thing that I did that really made me feel powerful
Speaker 1: and I felt like I claimed my position. We went
Speaker 1: out for this lovely dinner, cocktails, food share plates, a
Speaker 1: whole lot at this really nice place, and then at
Speaker 1: the end, I said, I've got the I've got it,
Speaker 1: Like I just really wanted to fucking say, don't you worry, guys,
Speaker 1: this dinner's what four hundred bucks? Five hundred bucks? I
Speaker 1: fucking got it. And I tapped my card in front
Speaker 1: of them both, and it was just like a real
Speaker 1: powerful moment for me to be like yeah, And I
Speaker 1: guess it was therapy for me in a way to
Speaker 1: talk to my dad's new partner about everything that I do.
Speaker 1: And she has an amazing job and she seems really
Speaker 1: switched on. So we were talking about everything from staffing
Speaker 1: and companies, and she was really engaging with me in
Speaker 1: this conversation. I could see my dad sitting there looking
Speaker 1: at me, and I feel like he was in awe
Speaker 1: a little bit, and I felt really powerful in that moment.
Speaker 1: I never thought in a million years that my dad
Speaker 1: would ever come back into the picture because it had been,
Speaker 1: you know, fifteen years, and I'm happy to have him
Speaker 1: in the picture at the distance that we have now.
Speaker 1: As he said, nothing's ever gonna be the same. But
Speaker 1: now you know, we send each other happy Birthday message,
Speaker 1: we send each other Merry Christmas. I'm happy with that.
Speaker 1: Have I forgiven him for everything? I'm beyond even forgiveness.
Speaker 1: I don't know how to explain it, but I just
Speaker 1: feel like I'm beyond that everything that I've built in
Speaker 1: my entire life, essentially without the support of either of
Speaker 1: my parents, to the point where I know that I
Speaker 1: am fine without them in my life if they weren't.
Speaker 1: So I don't know if I forgive him, because I
Speaker 1: think I got over that resentment a really long time ago.
Speaker 1: I'm kind of just at peace now. Before I recorded
Speaker 1: this podcast, I actually did a bit of research online.
Speaker 1: I was googling what are the links between not so
Speaker 1: great parenting and people becoming entrepreneurs.
Speaker 2: Do you think that because of your relationship with your
Speaker 2: parents and your upbringing, that that is the reason you
Speaker 2: have such a drive and motivation to succeed.
Speaker 1: Now, I definitely do, and I've thought about that a lot,
Speaker 1: And there's been a lot of studies that people that
Speaker 1: have faced adversity can become really powerful entrepreneurs. And I
Speaker 1: do think that having rocky relationships with both of my
Speaker 1: parents and feeling extremely abandoned by both of them on
Speaker 1: a multitude of occasions throughout my life has definitely led
Speaker 1: me to be the way that I am. And I've
Speaker 1: often thought, I think maybe it's all because of them
Speaker 1: that I am the way that I am now. The
Speaker 1: reason why I want to keep striving and achieving and
Speaker 1: pushing myself and doing the next crazy thing. I often
Speaker 1: wonder deep down in my brain. I've never been to therapy,
Speaker 1: but deep down in my brain, is this my motivation?
Speaker 1: Is this the reason why I keep striving? Am I
Speaker 1: trying to prove something, you know, to myself that I
Speaker 1: can do it on my own? Or am I subconsciously
Speaker 1: trying to prove it to them that fuck you and
Speaker 1: I can do this? You know? I think that's where
Speaker 1: my motivation deep down comes from.
Speaker 2: Was there a moment during Fate's growth where you were like,
Speaker 2: I would have love to have shared this with my.
Speaker 1: Parents every day. That's the one thing I wish I
Speaker 1: had in my life. I've got a lot of amazing things.
Speaker 1: I have Jackie, my step mom. I have Nan, who
Speaker 1: is my mum's mum who everyone knows. I've got a
Speaker 1: j the most wonderful partner ever. I've got this booming
Speaker 1: business with amazing employees, and without coming across Hoffy toffee,
Speaker 1: as my Nan would say, like I'm in a financially
Speaker 1: I'm in a financially wonderful position. And I think the
Speaker 1: thing that I'm missing in my life or I wish
Speaker 1: I had, was parents that could enjoy this with me.
Speaker 1: I would love to have parents that I could spoil rotten.
Speaker 1: I'd love to take my parents on a holiday. And
Speaker 1: I just don't think at any point in my life,
Speaker 1: I've ever felt like I really had that. And I
Speaker 1: felt like I was trying to do that with my
Speaker 1: mum by giving her a job and a house. Obviously,
Speaker 1: I'm not going to talk about that, but I feel
Speaker 1: like that just backfired on me. It's fucking disappointing. And
Speaker 1: the other thing that really upsets me too is I
Speaker 1: have a lot of people that follow me who are
Speaker 1: my mom's age. I have a lot of mums following me,
Speaker 1: and I don't remember where I was the other day,
Speaker 1: I was somewhere with AJ and I ran into this
Speaker 1: lady like we're in a busy area. I don't know
Speaker 1: if we're like a restaurant, a cafe or whatever, a bar,
Speaker 1: And this lady who looked about my mom's age or
Speaker 1: maybe she was in her fifties or something, she was
Speaker 1: walking by and she's like, I love you, I love
Speaker 1: your videos, I love your business. You should be so
Speaker 1: proud of yourself. Like this is just some random, you know,
Speaker 1: fifty something woman, And that happens every now and then,
Speaker 1: Like I ran into older people who follow my.
Speaker 2: With usked the other day at lunch.
Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly, and people on the street say that, and
Speaker 1: it really like hits me hard when it's someone who
Speaker 1: is the same age as my parents when they say
Speaker 1: you should be so proud of yourself, and like, I'm
Speaker 1: so proud of you, like a fucking random I always
Speaker 1: get upset in that moment because obviously that's beautiful of
Speaker 1: someone to say, but I'm like, fuck, I don't have
Speaker 1: that in my life personally, and it's just like what
Speaker 1: a waste. What a wasted opportunity.
Speaker 2: Do you have advice for anyone who is out and
Speaker 2: now who's study a business who doesn't have a very
Speaker 2: strong support system, Do you have any advice on how
Speaker 2: they navigate that and like where do they kind of
Speaker 2: gather that strength to kind of persevere? You know, I
Speaker 2: guess that's quite a personal thing. But if you could
Speaker 2: kind of pinpoint something to pass on that same motivation
Speaker 2: that you have had, what would that be.
Speaker 1: Definitely lean on other people in your life that aren't
Speaker 1: your direct family. I've done that since I was young,
Speaker 1: since Jackie came into my life, she has been my
Speaker 1: go to and I guess I've found it in other
Speaker 1: people as well. And then it gets me thinking, maybe
Speaker 1: that's why I always had a boyfriend, Like maybe I
Speaker 1: was always looking for someone to lean on because I
Speaker 1: didn't feel like I had anyone else to But I
Speaker 1: would say, embrace those people that are in your life.
Speaker 1: You can make your friends your family one hundred percent.
Speaker 1: I know some people say you can't poo can choose
Speaker 1: your family. In my opinion, you absolutely can, and just
Speaker 1: back yourself. I feel like, especially going back to my
Speaker 1: childhood with my dad and everything, that happened. I could
Speaker 1: have went one way or the other. So glad that
Speaker 1: I went the other way in the direction that I did.
Speaker 1: Don't get me wrong, I was fucking devastated for years.
Speaker 1: I couldn't even get out of bed when I was
Speaker 1: like a teenager in high school. But I don't know.
Speaker 1: I guess I believed in myself and pushed myself, and
Speaker 1: if anything, I found it to be the fuel to
Speaker 1: my fire. And I think that's why, really deep down
Speaker 1: I have achieved everything that I have is just by
Speaker 1: backing myself and believing myself. And I think when you
Speaker 1: try things the way that I have, and you continually
Speaker 1: prove to yourself that you can achieve things, it just
Speaker 1: pushes you to keep wanting to go further. So yeah,
Speaker 1: I guess that would be my advice.
Speaker 2: I just have to say, as your friend and your
Speaker 2: producer and on behalf of all of the people that
Speaker 2: support you in your business in your personal life, that
Speaker 2: it is a real testament to hear you say what
Speaker 2: you've said today and see the person that you've become,
Speaker 2: because it would have been very easy for you to
Speaker 2: have gone the complete obosit direction, like you said before,
Speaker 2: and a lot of people do, and a lot of
Speaker 2: people struggle to break that cycle. Yes, and I think
Speaker 2: that you are a really great example for especially women,
Speaker 2: but kind of anyone out there who's in similar situations
Speaker 2: and haven't had easy upbringings that you can completely turn
Speaker 2: your life around and you can grab it by the
Speaker 2: rains and really make something incredible out of it. And
Speaker 2: I've had a great upbringing, but you like inspire even
Speaker 2: me that I can take life by the rains. So on,
Speaker 2: behalf of everyone listening and he supports his podcast. Thank
Speaker 2: you for that. Thanks just being a really great, lovely
Speaker 2: person for everyone. Stop it.
Speaker 1: Oh well, I'm so glad to have spoken about this
Speaker 1: on the podcast. I don't share my feelings often, and
Speaker 1: I feel like this was kind of harder to talk
Speaker 1: about than I thought it would be. I'm usually so
Speaker 1: confident with everything I say, but with this, obviously, you know,
Speaker 1: I don't speak about this kind of stuff often. But yeah,
Speaker 1: that's great advice from you, Xander to anyone out there
Speaker 1: who is facing adversity with your family or your support network,
Speaker 1: fucking grab your life by the reins and fucking go
Speaker 1: for it, because that's what I do, and that may
Speaker 1: be the reason why I do it, but I've absolutely
Speaker 1: made the most out of it, and I think I've
Speaker 1: proven to myself that I can achieve anything and I
Speaker 1: don't need as much as I would love to have
Speaker 1: that support there. I can do it on my own anyway,
Speaker 1: my friends. That is that for today's episode of Big Business,
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm ending with a different feeling to
Speaker 1: how I normally do. Usually I'm feeling luck. I don't
Speaker 1: know I'm feeling different today, but let's end the episode
Speaker 1: with your tip of the week. My tip of the
Speaker 1: week on the theme of this whole episode is lean
Speaker 1: on those around you. There are people out there who
Speaker 1: absolutely love you and would love for you to lean
Speaker 1: on them, and you're not a bother to them anyway,
Speaker 1: my friends. As a way, I hope you've enjoyed listening.
Speaker 1: If you haven't already, feel free to hit me with
Speaker 1: a star rating on my pod, specifically five stars, but
Speaker 1: I don't accept anything other than but only five. You
Speaker 1: heard it here first, and feel free to stay up
Speaker 1: to date with me on socials. You all know my name,
Speaker 1: that's the name of my main account, but also feel
Speaker 1: free to jump over to my Big Business Instagram account,
Speaker 1: where you can also contact me message me and thank
Speaker 1: you again so much Stephanie for sending through your question
Speaker 1: in my DMS, which has completely inspired this episode. And
Speaker 1: I hope after listening to this you know me a
Speaker 1: little better as well as my business journey and the
Speaker 1: whole thing of fate after listening. So I'll be back
Speaker 1: on Wednesday with my bonus episode and every week after that.