WEBVTT - Do you F**K on a first date? 0:00:01.440 --> 0:00:03.360 I've definitely dated, my fast share. 0:00:03.120 --> 0:00:07.040 Of douchebags, my time just get tingling, fling my balls. 0:00:07.680 --> 0:00:10.120 Oh I'm spiraling. Oh my God, tell us. 0:00:10.119 --> 0:00:13.080 Everything flame emojis left, right, and center. 0:00:13.520 --> 0:00:16.239 Matt loves a bit of God and. 0:00:16.160 --> 0:00:18.360 I need to affect you back. I really need you 0:00:18.400 --> 0:00:18.560 with that. 0:00:18.920 --> 0:00:21.439 I know I'm jealous. I'm the most jealous person ever. 0:00:21.720 --> 0:00:23.919 Relationships like a fart. If you have to force it, 0:00:23.960 --> 0:00:24.920 it's probably shit. 0:00:24.840 --> 0:00:26.360 Hisity dot com for you. 0:00:26.600 --> 0:00:28.720 I'll be a bloody single and alone with ten cats 0:00:28.720 --> 0:00:29.720 for the rest of my life. 0:00:29.840 --> 0:00:30.800 Lie Lie. 0:00:31.360 --> 0:00:33.599 On today's episode of Where's Your Head At, we are 0:00:33.600 --> 0:00:36.080 talking about first dates and some of the crazy ones 0:00:36.159 --> 0:00:36.720 we have been on. 0:00:36.840 --> 0:00:39.440 We know they can be scary awkward, but we've got 0:00:39.479 --> 0:00:41.080 you covered. Stay tuned. 0:00:46.280 --> 0:00:47.319 Where's Your Head At is. 0:00:47.240 --> 0:00:51.600 A podcast that talks all things relationships, breakups, reality TV, 0:00:51.920 --> 0:00:54.160 trending shows, and everything in between. 0:00:56.160 --> 0:00:58.880 This is your new go to destination for laughs, gossip, 0:00:59.040 --> 0:01:12.120 intimate details, advice, and much more. Hey Matt, Hey, I know, 0:01:12.160 --> 0:01:12.800 how are you going. 0:01:13.000 --> 0:01:14.800 I'm going well today? How are you? 0:01:15.120 --> 0:01:18.520 I'm good? So the last time we chatted, you said 0:01:18.520 --> 0:01:21.640 you were going to have the chat is your man? 0:01:22.000 --> 0:01:25.720 How does that go. I mean, you're not crying and 0:01:25.760 --> 0:01:32.480 you're laughing, so could sign unless that's a nervous laugh. Wow, 0:01:32.600 --> 0:01:33.520 she just keeps laughing. 0:01:33.640 --> 0:01:37.840 Well, since we last spoke, I was telling you how 0:01:37.880 --> 0:01:40.560 I was in a bit of a situationship, how nothing 0:01:40.640 --> 0:01:45.880 was really defined, and you basically said to me that 0:01:46.040 --> 0:01:49.560 I should have that conversation. But before I even had 0:01:49.560 --> 0:01:53.320 the chance to have that conversation, he had the conversation. 0:01:53.000 --> 0:01:56.480 No way, So he was probably in the same boat 0:01:56.520 --> 0:01:59.440 as you, and he wanted to have the chat with you. Yeah, 0:01:59.480 --> 0:02:00.840 felt like in the same place. 0:02:01.160 --> 0:02:01.480 Yeah. 0:02:01.520 --> 0:02:04.880 So how it kind of came about was he listened 0:02:05.040 --> 0:02:09.760 to our first episode of Where's your Head Up where 0:02:09.800 --> 0:02:12.680 we talk about situationships, and he basically said to me, 0:02:13.240 --> 0:02:15.000 I kind of asked him about the podcast, and I 0:02:15.040 --> 0:02:17.160 was like, is there anything that you weren't okay with 0:02:17.400 --> 0:02:19.440 or things that you were worried about that I said 0:02:19.680 --> 0:02:23.520 during our podcast because obviously we're being very open and 0:02:23.600 --> 0:02:26.800 honest and raw. And he was like, no, Like the 0:02:26.840 --> 0:02:29.160 podcast is great, being supportive. 0:02:29.880 --> 0:02:30.400 I love that. 0:02:31.280 --> 0:02:33.160 Tick tick yeah, double tick. 0:02:33.320 --> 0:02:35.680 He basically said to me, I just want to make 0:02:35.720 --> 0:02:38.000 sure that you would have that chat with me if 0:02:38.080 --> 0:02:40.880 you wanted to progress things or move things further, because 0:02:40.880 --> 0:02:44.000 I basically said in our episode that I would be 0:02:44.040 --> 0:02:45.760 too scared to have that chat. 0:02:46.160 --> 0:02:48.040 So was that him initiating it then? 0:02:48.480 --> 0:02:53.400 Yeah, smooth, yeah. And then I was kind of like, well, 0:02:54.000 --> 0:02:56.680 I don't think I would initiate that chat with you. 0:02:57.360 --> 0:02:59.400 And then he was like, well, do you want to 0:02:59.400 --> 0:03:00.520 be exclusive with me? 0:03:02.440 --> 0:03:05.880 Was all exciting, and then I was like, yeah, like 0:03:05.960 --> 0:03:08.040 I would, I would love to be exclusive with you. 0:03:08.200 --> 0:03:10.120 And then we both got a little bit. 0:03:11.560 --> 0:03:12.960 So where set the scene? Where are you? 0:03:13.440 --> 0:03:15.679 So we're basically going on a date at dinner date 0:03:16.600 --> 0:03:19.480 and he came to mind first to have a wine. 0:03:20.400 --> 0:03:22.119 So you're exclusive with your man. 0:03:23.240 --> 0:03:26.280 It's so funny. I call him my man. It's so 0:03:26.440 --> 0:03:29.440 weird that yes. Continue. 0:03:30.040 --> 0:03:33.880 The big question here is have you deleted your dating apps? 0:03:34.639 --> 0:03:34.920 Yeah? 0:03:35.400 --> 0:03:38.080 Yeah, so it's going to the next stages now. 0:03:38.640 --> 0:03:40.520 I mean yeah, I think so it's moving in the 0:03:40.600 --> 0:03:42.440 right direction. I'm really happy. 0:03:42.640 --> 0:03:45.080 Congratulations, I'm happy for you. It's good to see you all. 0:03:45.520 --> 0:03:46.600 Love duf and smiling. 0:03:48.960 --> 0:03:51.560 Love is the strong. But yeah, I'm really happy. 0:03:51.720 --> 0:03:55.000 Yes, Okay, enough about me, because I'm feeling a bit 0:03:55.160 --> 0:04:01.480 uncomfortable and stressed. Tell me about your love life, because 0:04:01.720 --> 0:04:04.480 the little Bertie told me that you went on an 0:04:04.520 --> 0:04:06.520 extra session first date recently. 0:04:06.800 --> 0:04:10.480 Well, yeah, how topical is that that I went on 0:04:10.600 --> 0:04:14.720 a first date on the weekend. Let's put it this way, 0:04:14.760 --> 0:04:17.760 as far as first dates go, it was. It was amazing. 0:04:17.960 --> 0:04:21.080 So we went and got a cocktail and we went 0:04:21.120 --> 0:04:23.280 for a walk around the town. There's a big thing 0:04:23.279 --> 0:04:25.320 I look for, and it's energy in a partner. Now, 0:04:25.360 --> 0:04:27.680 I've been in relationships with the energy did not make 0:04:27.720 --> 0:04:30.400 me feel comfortable the whole time I was on edge 0:04:30.560 --> 0:04:34.560 with her. I just like, I just felt so comfortable. Nothing, nothing, 0:04:34.600 --> 0:04:37.240 I didn't feel stressed like it was just it was magical. 0:04:37.279 --> 0:04:37.760 It was good. 0:04:37.880 --> 0:04:39.880 It was magical. Wow. 0:04:40.160 --> 0:04:42.800 Yeah, So you just felt really comfortable in her presence, 0:04:42.839 --> 0:04:44.120 and you guys just clicked. 0:04:44.400 --> 0:04:46.880 We just clicked so much to the point that that 0:04:47.000 --> 0:04:50.040 was Saturday at two o'clock and I didn't leave with 0:04:50.120 --> 0:04:53.360 her till like Monday. 0:04:53.839 --> 0:04:55.919 So how was how many days? Does that make it? 0:04:55.920 --> 0:04:57.839 That you were with it for forty eight hours? 0:04:58.080 --> 0:05:01.600 So since the first date you didn't leave her side 0:05:02.000 --> 0:05:03.120 for forty eight hours? 0:05:03.240 --> 0:05:05.360 Did she feel the same way? Was she like, can 0:05:05.400 --> 0:05:09.000 this guy leave already? I don't want to be rude. 0:05:09.040 --> 0:05:10.839 It was a couple of times where I was like, like, 0:05:11.080 --> 0:05:13.160 should we leave, and she's like, no, just keep hanging out, 0:05:13.160 --> 0:05:17.040 and just kept hanging out. And then Tuesday I saw 0:05:17.080 --> 0:05:19.880 her again, and this is really. 0:05:19.760 --> 0:05:20.479 Cute, Matt. 0:05:20.640 --> 0:05:23.080 I can tell that you're really happy. And I said 0:05:23.080 --> 0:05:24.960 it to you earlier and I'm going to say it again. 0:05:25.080 --> 0:05:29.719 I feel like your energy is so positive, you're so happy, 0:05:30.200 --> 0:05:31.880 you're seeing the world through a new. 0:05:31.760 --> 0:05:35.279 Less I am. I honestly am. I've seen everything completely different. 0:05:35.400 --> 0:05:38.599 She's really cool, Like we just get along. I'm actually yeah, 0:05:38.640 --> 0:05:41.800 I don't even know what to say. I'm getting speechless 0:05:41.800 --> 0:05:42.480 for the first time. 0:05:42.839 --> 0:05:46.240 Question when did you guys actually start talking before you 0:05:46.360 --> 0:05:47.599 went on the first day? 0:05:47.839 --> 0:05:51.520 So this is a real interesting one. Actually, she I 0:05:51.560 --> 0:05:57.560 don't remember exactly, but I messaged her six years ago. 0:05:58.120 --> 0:05:59.479 So this is a slow burn. 0:06:01.160 --> 0:06:04.360 Yeah, I'm message her in twenty fifteen. I'm not sure 0:06:04.360 --> 0:06:07.000 if I met her through Instagram or through a dating app, 0:06:07.440 --> 0:06:10.200 but our messages on Instagram go back to twenty fifteen. 0:06:10.400 --> 0:06:10.640 Wow. 0:06:11.320 --> 0:06:13.680 Yeah, and then she got into a long term relationship 0:06:13.720 --> 0:06:16.839 and I'd just sling a reaction here and there. I'd 0:06:16.839 --> 0:06:18.920 see a post with their boyfriend. So I was like, ah, 0:06:19.000 --> 0:06:21.960 you know, I won't you know, respectful, be respectful. I 0:06:21.960 --> 0:06:25.159 won't pursue anything. And then obviously, naturally you start seeing 0:06:25.160 --> 0:06:28.000 stories and if someone breaks up with someone, their stories 0:06:28.040 --> 0:06:29.520 and their Instagram feed changes. 0:06:29.600 --> 0:06:31.200 It does there's a ship. 0:06:31.160 --> 0:06:34.120 There's a shit everyone can pick up when that happens. 0:06:34.160 --> 0:06:36.560 And I I shot her a message and I said, hey, 0:06:36.680 --> 0:06:39.279 are you single? And she said, yeah, I am. We're 0:06:39.320 --> 0:06:43.520 in We're in the awkward stages of like when you 0:06:43.520 --> 0:06:45.760 first broke up with the long term yeah. And I said, hey, 0:06:45.800 --> 0:06:48.320 I said, look, well that happens I know firsthand. I 0:06:48.320 --> 0:06:49.719 was like, that happens to a lot of us. I said, 0:06:49.720 --> 0:06:52.200 shoot me a message when you're ready to get a drink. 0:06:52.320 --> 0:06:53.760 And then I'll be waiting with. 0:06:55.360 --> 0:06:56.720 And then she shot me a message. She's like, I'm 0:06:56.720 --> 0:06:57.680 ready to get that drink now. 0:06:58.400 --> 0:07:00.480 And then you, guys, were not the best say you've 0:07:00.520 --> 0:07:01.160 ever been on? 0:07:01.520 --> 0:07:03.159 Yes, definitely the first? 0:07:03.360 --> 0:07:07.720 Do you think and then this is probably way too premature, 0:07:07.839 --> 0:07:14.080 but do you think she's the one because I've never 0:07:14.160 --> 0:07:18.920 seen you like this before, Matt, Like ever, Look, it's. 0:07:18.800 --> 0:07:20.800 A massive call issue. The one I want to be 0:07:20.800 --> 0:07:24.720 as honest as possible on this podcast, but I need 0:07:24.720 --> 0:07:25.880 to play it cool at the time. 0:07:27.480 --> 0:07:30.320 He doesn't want to dig his own great reckon. 0:07:30.360 --> 0:07:31.760 She's going to listen to this and if she hears 0:07:31.760 --> 0:07:34.520 me going, she's the one. Yeah. 0:07:34.680 --> 0:07:38.880 Just so we're just going to pause that question and 0:07:38.920 --> 0:07:41.040 we'll come back to you guys in a few episodes 0:07:41.080 --> 0:07:41.600 with the X. 0:07:41.920 --> 0:07:43.640 I don't want to scare her away. Like, imagine me 0:07:43.680 --> 0:07:46.400 if I scare away on the next episode. Yeah, well 0:07:46.520 --> 0:07:47.280 there'd be tears. 0:07:48.440 --> 0:07:51.560 Yeah, that will be inconsolable if this doesn't work out. 0:07:51.600 --> 0:07:54.400 So let's all say a small prayer tonight at bed 0:07:54.440 --> 0:07:56.520 from Matt and the future of his mental health in. 0:07:56.480 --> 0:07:58.040 The relationship. 0:07:59.760 --> 0:08:00.440 Work out. 0:08:09.360 --> 0:08:12.200 Okay, So dating is stressful and challenging at the best 0:08:12.200 --> 0:08:14.480 of times, and it's a bit of a mine field 0:08:14.480 --> 0:08:16.840 out there. So we're giving you our doo's and don'ts 0:08:16.880 --> 0:08:20.080 to make sure you nail your first date. 0:08:20.600 --> 0:08:22.679 All right. So I've got a list of the don'ts. 0:08:23.520 --> 0:08:24.280 I'm excited. 0:08:25.760 --> 0:08:28.280 I've started off with one that I think is very 0:08:28.280 --> 0:08:31.960 big and very important. Is and I know I'm guilty 0:08:32.000 --> 0:08:34.839 of it. I know a lot of people that I've 0:08:34.840 --> 0:08:36.959 been on dates with this don't talk about your ex. 0:08:37.320 --> 0:08:38.880 Do not talk about your ax. 0:08:38.960 --> 0:08:41.120 That is a that's a no no, and that you're 0:08:41.120 --> 0:08:43.800 already giving yourself a red flag exactly. 0:08:43.960 --> 0:08:47.480 Another one is don't let them know that you've stalked 0:08:47.480 --> 0:08:50.240 them on social media. So don't sit there and be like, oh, yeah, 0:08:50.320 --> 0:08:52.520 was that from your trip in Italy in. 0:08:52.400 --> 0:08:53.440 Two thousand and seven? 0:08:53.600 --> 0:08:56.040 Yeah, and they'll be like, wait, how do you know that? 0:08:56.280 --> 0:08:59.440 So just don't let them know. Obviously we all do it. Yeah, 0:08:59.559 --> 0:09:01.600 it's what we do these days, but just don't let 0:09:01.640 --> 0:09:04.040 them know because that can come across a bit intimidating. 0:09:04.200 --> 0:09:06.200 Play it a bit cool. Don't be too intense. 0:09:07.360 --> 0:09:10.040 Ask them like, if you know that they've been to Italy, 0:09:10.120 --> 0:09:12.280 then say have you been to Europe? And then you 0:09:12.320 --> 0:09:15.120 can be you know, that's a leading question and hopefully 0:09:15.160 --> 0:09:17.200 they'll tell you about that, and then in the future 0:09:17.240 --> 0:09:19.000 that you can talk about their two thousand and seven 0:09:19.080 --> 0:09:20.600 Italy trips, hopefully. 0:09:21.280 --> 0:09:28.080 Everything they did. Don't check your phone, so I think 0:09:28.080 --> 0:09:30.840 that you should sit your phone and do not disturb upright, 0:09:30.920 --> 0:09:32.559 because I think a red flag early is if someone 0:09:32.600 --> 0:09:34.439 sits their phone over the other way, it means they've 0:09:34.440 --> 0:09:36.440 got something to hide. So what I actually is, I 0:09:36.520 --> 0:09:38.680 like to put my phone face up, sit on the table, 0:09:39.000 --> 0:09:40.559 but have it on, do not disturb, so none of 0:09:40.600 --> 0:09:41.600 the nothing comes. 0:09:41.480 --> 0:09:43.839 On, none, none of the notifications are popping out. 0:09:43.840 --> 0:09:45.040 And I'm not tempted to have a look. 0:09:45.240 --> 0:09:48.120 I mean, I just think, put your phone away. I 0:09:48.600 --> 0:09:51.640 just think, don't even have it on the table. Everyone's different, 0:09:51.760 --> 0:09:54.600 but it's just a distraction. And I think it's important 0:09:54.679 --> 0:09:57.680 on a first date to show that person you're giving 0:09:57.720 --> 0:09:58.640 them your full. 0:09:58.440 --> 0:09:59.960 Attention divided attention. 0:10:00.280 --> 0:10:03.120 Yeah, like I'm here, We're on a day, it's going 0:10:03.120 --> 0:10:06.040 for an hour and here I am. 0:10:06.400 --> 0:10:07.400 Let's see how we. 0:10:07.400 --> 0:10:10.319 Go, all right, And this one, this one can give 0:10:10.320 --> 0:10:12.679 you the ick real quick. Like if I see this, 0:10:12.920 --> 0:10:15.800 I'm off and straight away. I can't run quick enough. 0:10:16.120 --> 0:10:17.800 It's don't be rude to the staff. 0:10:18.920 --> 0:10:19.800 Deal breaker. 0:10:20.440 --> 0:10:22.480 Like, yeah, I've seen some people be rude to the 0:10:22.520 --> 0:10:24.199 staff and I'm just straight off them. 0:10:24.360 --> 0:10:28.000 It cringes me out to my call. It's just if 0:10:28.000 --> 0:10:31.319 you like treat people the way you want to be treated. 0:10:31.520 --> 0:10:33.600 Yeah, there's no need to show off and be rude 0:10:33.640 --> 0:10:35.480 to them, and like it's not going to get you anywhere. 0:10:35.480 --> 0:10:37.520 And it's like it's going to turn the other person off. 0:10:37.600 --> 0:10:39.199 It's ugly and it's unattractive. 0:10:39.280 --> 0:10:42.120 You mentioned it before. Don't come on too strong. Yeah, 0:10:42.120 --> 0:10:43.960 so that means don't tell him you love them. Don't 0:10:43.960 --> 0:10:45.959 tell him like I'm going to put a ring on you, 0:10:47.880 --> 0:10:50.960 on you on your finger. Yeah, don't tell them. 0:10:50.920 --> 0:10:53.959 Don't do it. Don't do it. Matts. 0:10:54.520 --> 0:10:58.559 Matt's renowned for coming on way too strong. 0:10:58.720 --> 0:10:59.480 Zero to one hundred. 0:10:59.480 --> 0:11:03.959 Baby, we've all been there, And go to somewhere where 0:11:04.000 --> 0:11:06.440 you're not going to bump into people that you know as. 0:11:06.320 --> 0:11:09.640 Well, and somewhere that you feel comfortable totally. So don't 0:11:09.679 --> 0:11:11.920 go somewhere that's out of your price range, or don't 0:11:11.960 --> 0:11:16.000 go somewhere where, like say, it's just not who you are. Like, 0:11:16.080 --> 0:11:18.320 go somewhere that you feel comfortable in and that you're 0:11:18.320 --> 0:11:22.000 going to make them feel good. Yeap. Don't swear. That's 0:11:22.160 --> 0:11:23.520 I think that's a big one, and I think we're 0:11:23.520 --> 0:11:25.760 going to turn off. And when someone's just swearing heaps. 0:11:25.720 --> 0:11:31.120 Oh god, I don't have that. I not not like badly, sir, 0:11:31.160 --> 0:11:31.800 but I might. 0:11:31.720 --> 0:11:36.360 Like I'm going to finish on this one. I think 0:11:36.360 --> 0:11:40.120 it's very important. Don't worry if they like you worry 0:11:40.120 --> 0:11:41.000 if you like them. 0:11:41.320 --> 0:11:43.640 Amen, that is a huge one. 0:11:44.040 --> 0:11:46.200 We go on first dates and I think we're so 0:11:46.280 --> 0:11:50.200 concerned about them liking us and we don't even know 0:11:50.240 --> 0:11:52.600 if we even like them, Like, who cares if they 0:11:52.720 --> 0:11:53.120 like us? 0:11:53.160 --> 0:11:55.040 If we aren't even sure about them? 0:11:55.200 --> 0:11:58.720 Yeah, Now, if the date is going really well, would 0:11:58.760 --> 0:12:01.240 you sleep with someone after a first date? 0:12:01.480 --> 0:12:03.040 Oh, this is a genuine question. 0:12:05.360 --> 0:12:07.720 Well, like when do I not say them after a No? 0:12:07.800 --> 0:12:10.240 I would, and I would sleep with the Master a 0:12:10.240 --> 0:12:13.720 first date. Yes, but I have I have in the 0:12:13.760 --> 0:12:16.800 past had a little like thought like I don't want 0:12:16.800 --> 0:12:19.160 them to think I'm just sleeping with them for like 0:12:19.200 --> 0:12:22.160 a one night stand if it has gone really well. Okay, 0:12:22.280 --> 0:12:25.800 so there's that thought does cross my mind. But if 0:12:25.800 --> 0:12:27.000 they just want it to be a one night stand, 0:12:27.000 --> 0:12:28.240 they just want it to be a one night stand. 0:12:28.240 --> 0:12:29.720 I mean, I can't argue that I can try my 0:12:29.760 --> 0:12:31.840 hardest the next next time to win them back for 0:12:31.880 --> 0:12:34.400 something more. But yeah, I would sleep with the Master 0:12:34.400 --> 0:12:36.520 at first date. I say, yeah, I know that you've 0:12:36.559 --> 0:12:41.160 got you've got a five date rule or something I do. 0:12:42.080 --> 0:12:44.320 And Fee is enlightened us about that. Yeah. 0:12:44.400 --> 0:12:47.560 I mean, look, I obviously don't want to sleep with 0:12:47.679 --> 0:12:49.920 everyone who I go on a first date with to 0:12:50.040 --> 0:12:55.920 start with, I don't really have one night stands. So yeah, 0:12:55.960 --> 0:12:59.680 I guess I just developed my little five date rule 0:12:59.679 --> 0:13:03.160 poly and I think it's it's not for them, it's 0:13:03.200 --> 0:13:06.079 more for myself. Like I, five dates is a lot, 0:13:06.320 --> 0:13:08.800 five days is a lot, but I think for me, 0:13:09.240 --> 0:13:12.480 I put a lot of emphasis on having sex with someone, 0:13:12.520 --> 0:13:14.960 Like I wouldn't really have sex with someone unless I 0:13:15.040 --> 0:13:20.120 really like them. So during those five days, like that's 0:13:20.160 --> 0:13:22.760 at least a minimum of five hours that I've spent 0:13:22.800 --> 0:13:25.760 with that person. At a minimum, it's majority of the time, 0:13:25.800 --> 0:13:29.080 a lot more time that I've spent with them. But yeah, 0:13:29.120 --> 0:13:31.800 I think during that time frame, I get comfortable with them, 0:13:32.000 --> 0:13:36.160 I feel more respected. Sometimes after that five dates or 0:13:36.200 --> 0:13:38.920 before it, I get to three dates and I'm like, actually, 0:13:38.960 --> 0:13:40.920 I don't even want to sleep with you, and then 0:13:41.400 --> 0:13:44.880 I move on. So I think for me, it's always 0:13:44.920 --> 0:13:48.520 worked out really well. And yeah, it's just something that 0:13:48.559 --> 0:13:51.559 I enjoyed doing. And honestly, I think the more time 0:13:51.600 --> 0:13:54.480 I've spent with someone and gotten to know them really well, 0:13:54.920 --> 0:13:57.000 the better the sex ends up being. 0:13:57.360 --> 0:13:59.040 It is common to that, and I like I've met 0:13:59.040 --> 0:14:00.520 a lot of girls to do the three date. 0:14:00.400 --> 0:14:03.120 Rule, how would you go with with going through the 0:14:03.160 --> 0:14:05.520 five date rule process? 0:14:07.200 --> 0:14:14.839 Date, they'd be quick dates. Each would be something quick. 0:14:15.120 --> 0:14:17.600 Look that would be like, Okay, so we've just gone 0:14:17.600 --> 0:14:19.080 to dinner, I'm actually going to pick you up in 0:14:19.080 --> 0:14:21.280 the morning for breakfast. We have a lunch date for 0:14:21.920 --> 0:14:24.520 a day, and I've actually booked a movie date for 0:14:25.120 --> 0:14:25.800 seven pm. 0:14:26.240 --> 0:14:30.520 Ready. No. Look, if the girl, like if I was 0:14:30.600 --> 0:14:32.880 vibing her a lot and she was saying, I would 0:14:32.960 --> 0:14:35.400 happily do five dates. That's that's what she wants to do, 0:14:35.440 --> 0:14:36.520 I'm more than happy to. 0:14:36.920 --> 0:14:40.360 Something that definitely crosses my mind as a woman going 0:14:40.400 --> 0:14:43.640 on like dates with guys, and I feel like a 0:14:43.680 --> 0:14:46.600 lot of guys I've dated are a bit fuck boy. 0:14:46.640 --> 0:14:51.720 Five is that men kind of place women they go 0:14:51.800 --> 0:14:54.480 on dates with into two categories. So there's the fun 0:14:54.520 --> 0:14:57.400 category and then there's the WiFi category. 0:14:57.520 --> 0:14:58.480 Would you agree with that? 0:14:59.440 --> 0:15:03.160 H I think that in this day and age, we're 0:15:03.200 --> 0:15:05.760 all guilty of doing this. Yeah. I think men women 0:15:06.400 --> 0:15:08.480 and I think you know pretty early into a date 0:15:09.080 --> 0:15:10.560 what category are going to put them in. But I 0:15:10.600 --> 0:15:13.000 believed there's a third category as well, So it can 0:15:13.080 --> 0:15:18.400 either be like fun YEP or Wi Fi relationship or 0:15:18.440 --> 0:15:20.520 you're just not interested in friend zone zone. 0:15:20.560 --> 0:15:20.760 Yeah. 0:15:20.840 --> 0:15:23.560 Yeah, so and I think really early on you would 0:15:23.560 --> 0:15:24.640 know what they're going to be in. 0:15:24.880 --> 0:15:28.800 Yeah, And there's nothing wrong with getting that feeling and 0:15:28.880 --> 0:15:32.160 following that intuition that you feel and going with it. 0:15:32.760 --> 0:15:33.520 But yeah, I. 0:15:33.440 --> 0:15:35.520 Think and people leave each category, do you. 0:15:35.440 --> 0:15:37.600 Think you've miscategorized them? 0:15:37.720 --> 0:15:39.680 Yeah, so you've miscategorized them. She said, Oh, I want 0:15:39.720 --> 0:15:42.000 this one for fun, and then you're like, hang on, 0:15:43.080 --> 0:15:45.840 this could be my future wife my future hasn't. 0:15:46.800 --> 0:15:50.000 I mean, I don't think I've ever miscategorized someone. 0:15:51.000 --> 0:15:53.720 Have you my ex? I've slept with her for four 0:15:53.800 --> 0:15:56.880 years and then so I had her in that category 0:15:56.920 --> 0:16:00.400 and then I realized, hang on, like she's fucking like 0:16:00.560 --> 0:16:02.080 I like this girl. Wow. 0:16:02.800 --> 0:16:05.400 So you were friends with benefits with your ex for 0:16:05.520 --> 0:16:09.280 four years and then you decided that you had made 0:16:09.280 --> 0:16:09.920 a mistake. 0:16:10.640 --> 0:16:12.640 Yeah, well I just saw it from a different light 0:16:12.680 --> 0:16:14.480 with fresh eyes, and I was like, hang on, like. 0:16:15.160 --> 0:16:17.800 I'm obsessed with Yeah. 0:16:16.880 --> 0:16:18.360 Cool, you're giving me what I want, you know what 0:16:18.360 --> 0:16:20.680 I mean? Like, you're like you're taking a lot of boxes. 0:16:20.840 --> 0:16:23.160 And then you made it official after that long? 0:16:23.360 --> 0:16:24.400 Yeah, after four years? 0:16:24.480 --> 0:16:26.880 Yeah, wow, I did not know that. 0:16:27.160 --> 0:16:29.520 Yeah, it was a decent amount of time. So from 0:16:29.560 --> 0:16:30.520 eighteen to twenty two. 0:16:30.960 --> 0:16:32.920 Is that like a one off? Because I haven't really 0:16:32.960 --> 0:16:35.760 heard many stories like that that long. 0:16:36.000 --> 0:16:37.760 Yeah, I've never heard it either. Yeah. 0:16:37.760 --> 0:16:38.200 Wow. 0:16:38.600 --> 0:16:41.200 So forty one percent of people say that they take 0:16:41.280 --> 0:16:44.160 two to three minutes to decide if they want a 0:16:44.200 --> 0:16:45.080 second date. 0:16:45.400 --> 0:16:46.560 Wow, that's really quick. 0:16:46.760 --> 0:16:47.640 That's quick, isn't it. 0:16:47.680 --> 0:16:48.840 How long do you think it takes you? 0:16:50.640 --> 0:16:53.320 If I'm being really honest with myself, I think I 0:16:53.400 --> 0:16:56.440 know quite quickly. So I would tend to agree with 0:16:56.480 --> 0:16:57.320 that stat. 0:16:57.200 --> 0:17:00.120 Yeah, in that two to three minutes, I mean. 0:17:00.160 --> 0:17:02.760 Maybe a little bit longer. I definitely would give people 0:17:02.880 --> 0:17:05.320 the benefit of the doubt. And I think people definitely 0:17:05.320 --> 0:17:08.199 can surprise you. But for me, I think on a 0:17:08.280 --> 0:17:12.520 first date, I'm picking up on someone's energy. If I'm 0:17:12.560 --> 0:17:16.920 attracted to them, If I can feel their energy back 0:17:16.960 --> 0:17:20.000 and I can feel that they're attracted to me, very important. 0:17:20.080 --> 0:17:23.719 How I'm feeling, like, how they're making me feel. I 0:17:23.720 --> 0:17:27.119 guess sometimes it doesn't matter how good looking someone is, 0:17:27.200 --> 0:17:29.600 or how smart someone is, or how rich they are, 0:17:29.840 --> 0:17:33.520 if those key elements aren't there's like there's nothing that 0:17:33.560 --> 0:17:35.680 you can really do about that. And I think it's 0:17:35.720 --> 0:17:38.000 important to remember that on a first date, you can 0:17:38.680 --> 0:17:41.639 be the best version of yourself. Your chat can be 0:17:41.680 --> 0:17:45.840 on point, but sometimes it's nothing that you've done wrong. 0:17:45.960 --> 0:17:46.760 It's just not there. 0:17:47.119 --> 0:17:47.879 It's not there. 0:17:48.560 --> 0:17:51.760 Sometimes that spark and energy just isn't there and there's 0:17:51.800 --> 0:17:55.120 nothing you can do about it. How long would you say, I'd. 0:17:54.960 --> 0:17:56.520 Give it the whole time and when I leave and 0:17:56.560 --> 0:17:57.879 how they make me feel afterwards. 0:17:58.080 --> 0:18:00.920 Okay, so you wait for the dew of the date 0:18:01.080 --> 0:18:01.960 to make a decision. 0:18:02.080 --> 0:18:04.600 Yeah, and then more how I feel after them, like 0:18:04.640 --> 0:18:06.359 when I leave and I'm like, well, how is that? 0:18:06.400 --> 0:18:08.840 And I reflect back on it. Yeah, because I think 0:18:08.840 --> 0:18:11.200 it's way too early to decide in that, like when 0:18:11.240 --> 0:18:13.520 you're there with them and there's like stuff going on, 0:18:13.560 --> 0:18:16.960 you're talking about stuff. You're like, there's like like you say, 0:18:16.960 --> 0:18:19.359 if as at a restaurant, there's people like talking around you, 0:18:19.400 --> 0:18:20.880 there's like waiters and all that. I think it's way 0:18:20.880 --> 0:18:23.879 too early. But look, I know early on if I'm 0:18:23.920 --> 0:18:27.000 attracted to them, yeah, very early on. But to give 0:18:27.040 --> 0:18:29.080 it for a second day, I would see how it goes. 0:18:29.320 --> 0:18:31.719