1 00:00:00,800 --> 00:00:03,559 Speaker 1: Good our team, it's Harps. I hope you're terrific. Welcome 2 00:00:03,600 --> 00:00:07,560 Speaker 1: to another installment of life. As many of you know, 3 00:00:07,880 --> 00:00:12,040 Speaker 1: I'm sure my main job. I do lots of different things, 4 00:00:12,039 --> 00:00:16,000 Speaker 1: but I guess what I've done the most of consistently 5 00:00:16,040 --> 00:00:21,240 Speaker 1: over the last twenty years. But I've I've been speaking 6 00:00:21,239 --> 00:00:23,880 Speaker 1: for thirty years before that, a lot of exercise physiology 7 00:00:23,920 --> 00:00:27,760 Speaker 1: and training people. But in terms of my job, the 8 00:00:27,880 --> 00:00:32,200 Speaker 1: last twenty years, I've been speaking to teams and organizations 9 00:00:32,240 --> 00:00:39,440 Speaker 1: and companies here in Australia overseas in lots of different capacities, 10 00:00:40,760 --> 00:00:48,480 Speaker 1: sporting clubs, not for profits, government, Victoria, police, big organizations, 11 00:00:48,520 --> 00:00:54,200 Speaker 1: little organizations, mostly in the three dimensional face to face realm. 12 00:00:54,240 --> 00:00:59,680 Speaker 1: More recently a lot of online stuff. And I'm in 13 00:00:59,680 --> 00:01:02,320 Speaker 1: the middle of doing some gigs right now at the moment, 14 00:01:04,360 --> 00:01:05,840 Speaker 1: and so I've been doing that for a long time. 15 00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:09,080 Speaker 1: But I did my first paid speaking gig when I 16 00:01:09,120 --> 00:01:12,720 Speaker 1: was twenty six, which was thirty three years ago. I 17 00:01:12,760 --> 00:01:16,400 Speaker 1: got paid one hundred dollars. It was for a bunch 18 00:01:16,440 --> 00:01:24,679 Speaker 1: of blokes at a timberyard. I spoke for about I 19 00:01:24,720 --> 00:01:27,360 Speaker 1: can't remember if it was thirty or forty minutes. Probably 20 00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:31,920 Speaker 1: forty odd minutes. I spoke to them in what was 21 00:01:31,959 --> 00:01:36,160 Speaker 1: their smoko room. They're kind of their lunch room. I 22 00:01:36,160 --> 00:01:40,200 Speaker 1: can't even remember how many guys, maybe twenty. And I 23 00:01:40,240 --> 00:01:46,760 Speaker 1: remember preparing for that talk for weeks because the guy 24 00:01:46,800 --> 00:01:50,559 Speaker 1: who owned the business was a personal training client of mine, 25 00:01:51,600 --> 00:01:53,200 Speaker 1: and I used to talk to him about all the 26 00:01:53,240 --> 00:01:55,720 Speaker 1: stuff I talk about, you know, health and fitness and 27 00:01:55,760 --> 00:01:59,160 Speaker 1: get them in shape and a bitter nutrition bit of mindset, 28 00:01:59,280 --> 00:02:02,640 Speaker 1: very fundament until back in the day, of course, pretty rudimentary, 29 00:02:02,640 --> 00:02:05,440 Speaker 1: but nonetheless, he thought there was value in it. And 30 00:02:05,480 --> 00:02:07,240 Speaker 1: he said, you know, the stuff that you talk to 31 00:02:07,320 --> 00:02:10,120 Speaker 1: me about, could you come in and talk to my dudes, 32 00:02:10,160 --> 00:02:12,520 Speaker 1: my guys about that. Could you talk to my team 33 00:02:12,600 --> 00:02:16,080 Speaker 1: about physical health and a bit about nutrition, bit about 34 00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:19,280 Speaker 1: looking after themselves. Like I said, pretty rudimentary, fundamental stuff 35 00:02:19,320 --> 00:02:22,280 Speaker 1: back then, but nonetheless, and I was excited because I'd 36 00:02:22,280 --> 00:02:24,520 Speaker 1: done a little bit of speaking in front of groups 37 00:02:24,600 --> 00:02:29,720 Speaker 1: not paid. I kind of enjoyed it, and you know, 38 00:02:29,760 --> 00:02:32,799 Speaker 1: I thought, maybe, imagine if I could do this as 39 00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:35,960 Speaker 1: a living or part of my living. Imagine if part 40 00:02:35,960 --> 00:02:38,920 Speaker 1: of my income could be standing in front of people 41 00:02:38,960 --> 00:02:40,959 Speaker 1: talking about the shit that I love. The shit that 42 00:02:41,040 --> 00:02:46,880 Speaker 1: I'm passionate about. So I rocked up. I did my gig. 43 00:02:47,240 --> 00:02:53,639 Speaker 1: I stumbled and started a few times, and I, after 44 00:02:53,720 --> 00:02:57,160 Speaker 1: two weeks of prep and copious amounts of planning and 45 00:02:57,880 --> 00:03:01,040 Speaker 1: note writing, I think I came We came up with 46 00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:05,440 Speaker 1: like a one page dot point with a million dot 47 00:03:05,480 --> 00:03:07,200 Speaker 1: points on it of what I was going to talk 48 00:03:07,240 --> 00:03:10,359 Speaker 1: to them about. Well, of course I started, and then 49 00:03:10,400 --> 00:03:13,320 Speaker 1: I forgot about my dot points. And then I looked 50 00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:15,640 Speaker 1: at my dot points and I couldn't fucking remember what 51 00:03:15,680 --> 00:03:20,160 Speaker 1: I'd spoken about and not spoken about. And I've forgot 52 00:03:20,160 --> 00:03:22,360 Speaker 1: the story that I was going to tell to highlight 53 00:03:22,440 --> 00:03:24,760 Speaker 1: that particular point. And I thought I would try and 54 00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:27,920 Speaker 1: be a bit amusing and funny. That didn't work. Bottom 55 00:03:27,919 --> 00:03:30,200 Speaker 1: line is I spoke for whatever it was thirty or 56 00:03:30,240 --> 00:03:34,680 Speaker 1: forty minutes, and I wasn't very good. I wasn't very 57 00:03:34,680 --> 00:03:38,280 Speaker 1: good at all. I would give me for where I 58 00:03:38,360 --> 00:03:43,920 Speaker 1: was at then in terms of skill and knowledge and competence, 59 00:03:44,520 --> 00:03:46,760 Speaker 1: maybe I'd give me a three or four out of ten. 60 00:03:46,800 --> 00:03:51,200 Speaker 1: But now with what I know and my skill level 61 00:03:51,240 --> 00:03:53,640 Speaker 1: now and competence and understanding now, I would give me 62 00:03:53,720 --> 00:03:56,320 Speaker 1: a one. I did not do a great job at all. 63 00:03:56,920 --> 00:03:59,800 Speaker 1: There were no questions, there was no interaction. Nobody wanted 64 00:03:59,800 --> 00:04:02,520 Speaker 1: to know anything. Nobody spoke to me when I finished, 65 00:04:02,920 --> 00:04:04,680 Speaker 1: as soon as I said, you know, I'll be here 66 00:04:04,680 --> 00:04:07,760 Speaker 1: if anyone's got a question, And everybody got up and 67 00:04:07,880 --> 00:04:09,920 Speaker 1: fucking run out of the room, run out of the room. 68 00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:14,520 Speaker 1: And that happened. Not long later, doing a fitness industry thing, 69 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:18,320 Speaker 1: talking to some would be personal trainers, or perhaps it 70 00:04:18,400 --> 00:04:20,760 Speaker 1: was jim instructors in those days, but anyway, I did 71 00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:23,160 Speaker 1: a similar thing, but this time I spoke for two hours, 72 00:04:24,080 --> 00:04:27,360 Speaker 1: talking about strength training and writing programs and all that 73 00:04:27,440 --> 00:04:31,440 Speaker 1: kind of stuff. Same thing happened. This was within a 74 00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:36,560 Speaker 1: few months of each other, and I finished, Everyone left 75 00:04:36,560 --> 00:04:39,599 Speaker 1: the room. No one asked a question. A young lady 76 00:04:39,640 --> 00:04:42,359 Speaker 1: came up to me, and I thought I was on 77 00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:44,800 Speaker 1: a winner because she had a question. So she must 78 00:04:44,839 --> 00:04:46,880 Speaker 1: have been a bit interested, and she did have a question, 79 00:04:46,920 --> 00:04:50,240 Speaker 1: but unfortunately for me, the question was will you be 80 00:04:50,360 --> 00:04:53,760 Speaker 1: here teaching next week? The answer was yes, I will be. 81 00:04:53,880 --> 00:04:57,040 Speaker 1: The look on her face was one of disappointment, and 82 00:04:57,120 --> 00:04:59,320 Speaker 1: she promptly left the room and she did not come 83 00:04:59,360 --> 00:05:02,159 Speaker 1: the following Why didn't she come? Of course, she didn't 84 00:05:02,200 --> 00:05:05,800 Speaker 1: want to fucking hear me, I was no good, so 85 00:05:06,880 --> 00:05:13,279 Speaker 1: failing embarrassment, not being good, not having a high level 86 00:05:13,279 --> 00:05:19,000 Speaker 1: of skill or competence, That's where I've always started. I've 87 00:05:19,000 --> 00:05:23,000 Speaker 1: done most of my learning through trial and error. Yes 88 00:05:23,040 --> 00:05:26,640 Speaker 1: I've done academic learning, and yes I've sat in classrooms 89 00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:30,039 Speaker 1: and set exams, and yes I'm doing a PhD right now. 90 00:05:30,040 --> 00:05:33,039 Speaker 1: But in terms of in terms of my ability to 91 00:05:33,200 --> 00:05:36,159 Speaker 1: do what I do, in terms of my ability to 92 00:05:36,279 --> 00:05:42,320 Speaker 1: run a business, to solve problems, to negotiate different things 93 00:05:42,320 --> 00:05:44,360 Speaker 1: that I need to, To be able to stand in front 94 00:05:44,360 --> 00:05:47,279 Speaker 1: of an audience and build rapport and connection and tell 95 00:05:47,320 --> 00:05:50,440 Speaker 1: a story and be funny and share thoughts and ideas 96 00:05:50,440 --> 00:05:54,520 Speaker 1: in a way that's broadly relevant and relatable. That is 97 00:05:54,600 --> 00:05:57,240 Speaker 1: something that has happened through trial and error. That is 98 00:05:57,360 --> 00:06:01,520 Speaker 1: something that's happened through falling down and getting up. That's 99 00:06:01,560 --> 00:06:06,400 Speaker 1: something that's happened through me being comfortable with not being good. 100 00:06:08,400 --> 00:06:11,839 Speaker 1: The starting point for everything that I'm now, I guess 101 00:06:11,839 --> 00:06:14,680 Speaker 1: you would say good at or somewhat competent at, or 102 00:06:14,760 --> 00:06:18,919 Speaker 1: skilled at, or paid for. The starting point for me 103 00:06:19,320 --> 00:06:29,960 Speaker 1: was incompetence, ignorance, lack of knowledge, lack of skill, and 104 00:06:30,120 --> 00:06:32,719 Speaker 1: inability to be able to perform at a high level 105 00:06:32,839 --> 00:06:36,159 Speaker 1: at that thing. That is where I started. I started 106 00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:38,760 Speaker 1: as the white belt. I started as the white belt, 107 00:06:39,080 --> 00:06:42,600 Speaker 1: and I metaphorically got strangled and kicked and choked and punched, 108 00:06:42,720 --> 00:06:44,760 Speaker 1: and I did not do a good job. But I 109 00:06:44,800 --> 00:06:47,800 Speaker 1: came back and I kept training, and I kept showing up, 110 00:06:47,839 --> 00:06:50,600 Speaker 1: and I kept doing the work, and I kept asking questions, 111 00:06:50,920 --> 00:06:54,320 Speaker 1: and I kept learning through my failure. I kept learning 112 00:06:54,400 --> 00:07:00,000 Speaker 1: through my mediocrity. I kept learning through my poor results. 113 00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:03,760 Speaker 1: And many of you know that this podcast Life is, 114 00:07:03,760 --> 00:07:07,040 Speaker 1: in fact my fifth podcast. My fourth is the U Project. 115 00:07:07,880 --> 00:07:10,000 Speaker 1: And you also know some of you that I did 116 00:07:10,040 --> 00:07:14,040 Speaker 1: three podcasts before the U Project that didn't work. They failed. 117 00:07:14,080 --> 00:07:16,800 Speaker 1: I made no money in fast, In fact, I lost money, 118 00:07:17,000 --> 00:07:18,840 Speaker 1: and that was over two years. And then when I 119 00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:22,080 Speaker 1: started the U Project, it took at least another two 120 00:07:22,240 --> 00:07:25,840 Speaker 1: years of almost daily shows daily now but almost daily 121 00:07:25,880 --> 00:07:29,480 Speaker 1: shows back then, so four years of podcasting in total 122 00:07:29,840 --> 00:07:33,960 Speaker 1: before I made a dollar. So I was losing money 123 00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:37,560 Speaker 1: for four years. I was losing money for what added 124 00:07:37,680 --> 00:07:41,600 Speaker 1: up to around eight hundred episodes of The U Project 125 00:07:41,640 --> 00:07:46,840 Speaker 1: and my other shows before I had something that was 126 00:07:46,840 --> 00:07:53,280 Speaker 1: commercially viable. Before I could say well, this is working now, 127 00:07:53,480 --> 00:07:56,280 Speaker 1: it wasn't. It was working in that we were producing 128 00:07:56,360 --> 00:08:00,200 Speaker 1: shows and some people were listening. But depending on watch 129 00:08:00,240 --> 00:08:04,200 Speaker 1: a metric for successes, it's conceivable that we could say 130 00:08:04,360 --> 00:08:08,160 Speaker 1: I failed for eight hundred episodes. I don't think I 131 00:08:08,240 --> 00:08:10,880 Speaker 1: failed for eight hundred episodes because I learned and I 132 00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:14,040 Speaker 1: grew and I evolved and I developed inside understanding, awareness, 133 00:08:14,560 --> 00:08:17,360 Speaker 1: skill competence, and I got better and I learned how 134 00:08:17,360 --> 00:08:21,119 Speaker 1: to interview people better and listen better, and produce better 135 00:08:21,200 --> 00:08:24,000 Speaker 1: and know where to go and where not to go 136 00:08:24,040 --> 00:08:26,720 Speaker 1: in a podcast. It was all learning, It was all development, 137 00:08:26,800 --> 00:08:30,040 Speaker 1: It was all skill acquisition. But on a level I 138 00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:33,679 Speaker 1: was losing money, making no dough and failing. But that 139 00:08:33,840 --> 00:08:37,000 Speaker 1: is why the title of this episode is the successful failure, 140 00:08:37,040 --> 00:08:40,440 Speaker 1: because while I was failing in a sense, I was 141 00:08:40,480 --> 00:08:44,240 Speaker 1: getting closer to success because I was simply doing what's 142 00:08:44,320 --> 00:08:49,640 Speaker 1: required to build the right muscles to become a successful podcast. 143 00:08:49,800 --> 00:08:52,480 Speaker 1: I was building the right muscles when I was younger, 144 00:08:52,760 --> 00:08:55,360 Speaker 1: although I was falling down and getting up and failing 145 00:08:55,400 --> 00:08:59,400 Speaker 1: and fucking up. When I opened my first personal training center, 146 00:08:59,480 --> 00:09:02,560 Speaker 1: the first one Australia, at twenty six, I made a 147 00:09:02,679 --> 00:09:07,160 Speaker 1: million mistakes. I failed in inverted commas many times because 148 00:09:07,160 --> 00:09:10,080 Speaker 1: I didn't know what I was doing. But I couldn't 149 00:09:10,120 --> 00:09:12,440 Speaker 1: get good at the thing that I wouldn't do, So 150 00:09:12,559 --> 00:09:14,760 Speaker 1: I had to do the things I wasn't good at 151 00:09:15,040 --> 00:09:17,400 Speaker 1: in order to learn, in order to develop, in order 152 00:09:17,440 --> 00:09:20,400 Speaker 1: to understand, and in order to be able to get 153 00:09:20,440 --> 00:09:25,640 Speaker 1: good over the long term. This aversion that so many 154 00:09:25,720 --> 00:09:30,440 Speaker 1: of us have to not failing, to not looking silly, 155 00:09:30,559 --> 00:09:34,520 Speaker 1: to not being embarrassed, to not being able to cope 156 00:09:34,559 --> 00:09:38,520 Speaker 1: with anything other than a positive outcome, is actually a 157 00:09:38,600 --> 00:09:44,719 Speaker 1: massive self limitation. I want to do the things that 158 00:09:44,920 --> 00:09:48,840 Speaker 1: make me better, and if that is periodically failing, falling, 159 00:09:49,320 --> 00:09:53,280 Speaker 1: looking silly, I'm completely up for that. I want to 160 00:09:53,320 --> 00:09:55,320 Speaker 1: go where I grow. I want to be in the 161 00:09:55,440 --> 00:09:58,000 Speaker 1: room where I'm the dumbest. I want to be in 162 00:09:58,040 --> 00:10:00,600 Speaker 1: the room where I'm the least skilled. I want to 163 00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:03,319 Speaker 1: be in the room where I'm the least successful because 164 00:10:03,400 --> 00:10:07,040 Speaker 1: I want to surround myself with a culture, with a mindset, 165 00:10:07,080 --> 00:10:09,680 Speaker 1: and with people that are better than me, so that 166 00:10:09,760 --> 00:10:14,560 Speaker 1: I'll get dragged up. That's how I learn when I'm 167 00:10:14,600 --> 00:10:18,400 Speaker 1: constantly mixing with people that I have more skill, knowledge, 168 00:10:18,400 --> 00:10:21,160 Speaker 1: and understanding in a particular area than all I'm doing 169 00:10:21,280 --> 00:10:25,080 Speaker 1: is making myself look good and stroking my ego. I 170 00:10:25,160 --> 00:10:28,040 Speaker 1: want to be I want to be the perpetual student, 171 00:10:28,080 --> 00:10:29,960 Speaker 1: and of course there'll be times when I'm standing in 172 00:10:29,960 --> 00:10:32,160 Speaker 1: front of an audience to teach. I'm not talking about 173 00:10:32,160 --> 00:10:36,280 Speaker 1: that so much. I'm just talking about putting myself. I'm 174 00:10:36,320 --> 00:10:39,960 Speaker 1: talking to you about putting yourself in the middle of 175 00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:46,120 Speaker 1: a situation, an environment, a culture, a process that you 176 00:10:46,240 --> 00:10:49,600 Speaker 1: are going to grow in, and it will feel like failure, 177 00:10:50,120 --> 00:10:54,439 Speaker 1: but really, over the long term, it's part of becoming successful. 178 00:10:55,400 --> 00:10:56,040 Speaker 1: See you tomorrow.