1 00:00:00,320 --> 00:00:03,680 Speaker 1: I've got our team. I hope you bloody terrific Happy Monday. Well, 2 00:00:03,880 --> 00:00:05,640 Speaker 1: I mean, if you're listening to this the day that 3 00:00:05,680 --> 00:00:08,159 Speaker 1: it comes out, happy Monday. But whatever day, it is, 4 00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:14,680 Speaker 1: happy that day for you. So we had a little 5 00:00:14,680 --> 00:00:17,680 Speaker 1: problem with today's episode. Something that was planned fell through. 6 00:00:17,680 --> 00:00:19,880 Speaker 1: But that happens, and that's okay. But in the spirit 7 00:00:19,920 --> 00:00:22,720 Speaker 1: of making this a seven day a week for as 8 00:00:22,760 --> 00:00:26,720 Speaker 1: long as humanly possible affair out Comma, I've decided to 9 00:00:27,960 --> 00:00:34,239 Speaker 1: resurrect revisit this particular episode that I recorded quite a 10 00:00:34,400 --> 00:00:38,320 Speaker 1: while ago. This is a freestyle me thinking out Loud. 11 00:00:38,360 --> 00:00:42,080 Speaker 1: It's a solo. Of all the episodes that we've done 12 00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:47,640 Speaker 1: heading towards two thousand, this has been the most talked about, 13 00:00:47,720 --> 00:00:53,840 Speaker 1: the most shared and re shared, the most popular episode 14 00:00:53,880 --> 00:00:55,520 Speaker 1: that I've ever done. I'm not sure why. I just 15 00:00:55,600 --> 00:00:59,000 Speaker 1: think it, you know, for whatever reason, the ideas, the concepts, 16 00:00:59,040 --> 00:01:02,200 Speaker 1: the energy, I don't know. The mood I was in 17 00:01:02,240 --> 00:01:05,000 Speaker 1: on the day seemed to really resonate with people, and 18 00:01:05,360 --> 00:01:11,680 Speaker 1: it seemed for many people to be relatively inspiring and 19 00:01:11,760 --> 00:01:16,440 Speaker 1: motivating their words, not mine, which is very nice of course. Anyway, 20 00:01:16,959 --> 00:01:19,480 Speaker 1: So we'll be back with normal scheduling Tomorrow. We'll be 21 00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:23,720 Speaker 1: back tomorrow as normal on the U Project, but for today, 22 00:01:24,920 --> 00:01:27,440 Speaker 1: let's revisit a little bit of a blast from the past. 23 00:01:27,480 --> 00:01:32,000 Speaker 1: I hope this finds you well. Enjoy it all right. 24 00:01:32,040 --> 00:01:34,240 Speaker 1: I want to talk about the propensity that we have 25 00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:39,800 Speaker 1: to give up to stop, to throw in the towel, 26 00:01:40,640 --> 00:01:45,760 Speaker 1: to make excuses to rationalize not doing it anymore. And so, 27 00:01:46,280 --> 00:01:50,600 Speaker 1: as you would have seen, I'm calling this podcast Becoming 28 00:01:50,840 --> 00:01:53,600 Speaker 1: ungive Upable, which is a ridiculous title, but it made 29 00:01:53,600 --> 00:01:55,760 Speaker 1: me laugh when I thought of that word unngive upable, 30 00:01:55,760 --> 00:01:58,920 Speaker 1: because I would like to be ungive upable. I don't 31 00:01:58,960 --> 00:02:01,280 Speaker 1: think I am that, but I think I'm working towards it, 32 00:02:01,320 --> 00:02:04,120 Speaker 1: and I don't know that it depends what you call 33 00:02:04,160 --> 00:02:06,520 Speaker 1: giving up too. I'm not talking about sometimes we just 34 00:02:06,560 --> 00:02:12,120 Speaker 1: decide to not do something because that's strategically necessary or 35 00:02:12,160 --> 00:02:16,320 Speaker 1: medically necessary or practically necessary. I'm not talking about that. 36 00:02:16,400 --> 00:02:20,520 Speaker 1: I'm talking about I'm talking today about the things that 37 00:02:20,560 --> 00:02:23,080 Speaker 1: we just throw the towel in on that we know 38 00:02:23,200 --> 00:02:27,240 Speaker 1: that we shouldn't, the things that we rationalize when we 39 00:02:27,320 --> 00:02:31,760 Speaker 1: know our rationale is actually bullshit, and the times when 40 00:02:32,320 --> 00:02:34,560 Speaker 1: and again there's no I don't mean to be any 41 00:02:34,639 --> 00:02:38,800 Speaker 1: judgment in this, just acknowledgment because I have done Not 42 00:02:38,840 --> 00:02:41,800 Speaker 1: only have I done this, I've done it many, many, 43 00:02:41,840 --> 00:02:45,840 Speaker 1: many times. So I'm speaking from personal experience that is 44 00:02:45,960 --> 00:02:49,040 Speaker 1: me doing it, and also personal experience working with tens 45 00:02:49,040 --> 00:02:52,560 Speaker 1: of thousands of people for decades who have also struggled 46 00:02:52,600 --> 00:02:57,880 Speaker 1: with this idea of maintaining the behavior, doing the thing, 47 00:02:58,120 --> 00:03:01,000 Speaker 1: doing the work, creating new have it's creating a new 48 00:03:01,320 --> 00:03:06,160 Speaker 1: operating system, creating a new behavioral default setting, a new eating, 49 00:03:06,200 --> 00:03:11,960 Speaker 1: default setting, exercise, default setting, work, default setting, relationship to 50 00:03:11,960 --> 00:03:15,000 Speaker 1: fault setting, whatever it is, so that that thing that 51 00:03:15,040 --> 00:03:19,040 Speaker 1: we used to do when we were temporarily motivated becomes 52 00:03:19,080 --> 00:03:22,359 Speaker 1: the thing that we do all the time now because 53 00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:28,079 Speaker 1: we've created a new blueprint. We've created a new system, 54 00:03:28,760 --> 00:03:34,920 Speaker 1: a subconscious, conscious, behavioral, and practical operating system that aligns 55 00:03:34,960 --> 00:03:38,360 Speaker 1: with our goals and our purpose and our values. And 56 00:03:38,400 --> 00:03:42,960 Speaker 1: so what we know is what we know is and 57 00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:45,080 Speaker 1: I've mentioned this a few times over the years, that 58 00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:48,920 Speaker 1: gym owners can sell or gyms can sell more memberships 59 00:03:48,960 --> 00:03:54,160 Speaker 1: than the gym can accommodate because they know that people 60 00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:57,080 Speaker 1: won't come, They know that people will make decisions that 61 00:03:57,120 --> 00:03:59,480 Speaker 1: they don't follow through on. They know that people will 62 00:03:59,480 --> 00:04:01,720 Speaker 1: come in the door, or they'll hand over their money, 63 00:04:01,760 --> 00:04:03,680 Speaker 1: they'll sign up for a year or two years, or 64 00:04:03,680 --> 00:04:07,360 Speaker 1: they'll sign up on a direct debit, weekly, monthly, whatever 65 00:04:07,360 --> 00:04:11,760 Speaker 1: it is, and more than likely they will not use 66 00:04:11,840 --> 00:04:15,040 Speaker 1: that gym or those resources, or that membership the way 67 00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:19,240 Speaker 1: that they intended to on day one. More people won't 68 00:04:19,279 --> 00:04:24,040 Speaker 1: do it than will. So the gym that I currently 69 00:04:24,080 --> 00:04:27,679 Speaker 1: train at has I think it's around fifteen or sixteen 70 00:04:27,760 --> 00:04:30,680 Speaker 1: hundred members. I don't have data on how many go 71 00:04:30,880 --> 00:04:34,359 Speaker 1: or don't go, but I go at all times of 72 00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:36,200 Speaker 1: the day, and I can tell you I see a 73 00:04:36,200 --> 00:04:40,039 Speaker 1: lot of the same people there, and I'm there seven 74 00:04:40,120 --> 00:04:44,000 Speaker 1: days a week, and it's not often see I mean 75 00:04:44,040 --> 00:04:46,440 Speaker 1: I see new people. Yeah, But you would think that 76 00:04:46,480 --> 00:04:49,320 Speaker 1: if all of those fifteen or sixteen hundred people were training, 77 00:04:49,880 --> 00:04:54,240 Speaker 1: that I would see just constantly different people than I don't. So, 78 00:04:55,320 --> 00:04:57,440 Speaker 1: you know, the best guess is that they're or my 79 00:04:57,520 --> 00:05:00,520 Speaker 1: best guess is that there are somewhere around fifteen to 80 00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:04,599 Speaker 1: twenty percent of people who train who are current members, 81 00:05:04,600 --> 00:05:08,520 Speaker 1: who train consistently and well and do what they intended 82 00:05:08,520 --> 00:05:11,560 Speaker 1: to do. There's and again this is bro science. This 83 00:05:11,640 --> 00:05:14,240 Speaker 1: is from forty years of working in gyms and watching 84 00:05:14,760 --> 00:05:19,200 Speaker 1: There's maybe another twenty percent who are somewhat spasmodic. There's 85 00:05:19,240 --> 00:05:22,880 Speaker 1: maybe another twenty percent who go every now and then, 86 00:05:23,000 --> 00:05:25,600 Speaker 1: and then there's forty percent who are current members who 87 00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:29,680 Speaker 1: pretty much never go. And so now that's not the 88 00:05:29,680 --> 00:05:32,560 Speaker 1: fold of the gym. That's just a reflection on or 89 00:05:32,600 --> 00:05:35,919 Speaker 1: a commentary on our ability to do the thing that 90 00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:40,080 Speaker 1: we set out to do. Yeah, so I have a 91 00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:42,520 Speaker 1: few questions. I want to go through some general stuff, 92 00:05:42,560 --> 00:05:45,880 Speaker 1: some practical stuff, some cognitive stuff, and I want to 93 00:05:45,880 --> 00:05:50,640 Speaker 1: ask a few questions. And I guess the reason that 94 00:05:50,720 --> 00:05:57,000 Speaker 1: I'm very passionate about this is because as a coach, 95 00:05:57,440 --> 00:06:03,800 Speaker 1: personal trainer, exercise scientist, you know, high performance speaker, blah blah, 96 00:06:03,839 --> 00:06:05,920 Speaker 1: all the shit that I do. Not an expert though, 97 00:06:05,960 --> 00:06:07,799 Speaker 1: by the way, not an expert, but just a bloke 98 00:06:07,839 --> 00:06:10,600 Speaker 1: who's spend a lot of time talking to people about change. 99 00:06:10,839 --> 00:06:13,719 Speaker 1: Like literally, you think about my job when I go 100 00:06:13,800 --> 00:06:16,240 Speaker 1: into work with a company at one thousand people or 101 00:06:16,279 --> 00:06:19,039 Speaker 1: ten people, we're talking about change, that is, how do 102 00:06:19,080 --> 00:06:21,960 Speaker 1: we think better, do, better connect, better perform, better serve 103 00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:24,880 Speaker 1: our clients? Better, create a better culture. How do we 104 00:06:24,960 --> 00:06:29,360 Speaker 1: do better? Better equals change? Positive change. When someone comes 105 00:06:29,360 --> 00:06:31,800 Speaker 1: to my workshop or a seminar, they're not there because 106 00:06:31,800 --> 00:06:34,839 Speaker 1: they want no results or no change or no difference. 107 00:06:34,880 --> 00:06:38,239 Speaker 1: They're there because they want to change. There's something about 108 00:06:38,279 --> 00:06:40,840 Speaker 1: the way they think or do life, or behave, or 109 00:06:40,839 --> 00:06:45,120 Speaker 1: interact or communicate or experience the world around them that 110 00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:48,440 Speaker 1: they want to change. When someone joins a gym, it's 111 00:06:48,480 --> 00:06:51,120 Speaker 1: the same. When someone sees a dietitian. It's the same. 112 00:06:51,440 --> 00:06:54,480 Speaker 1: When someone jumps into my mentoring group on Monday nights. 113 00:06:55,080 --> 00:06:58,000 Speaker 1: As you know, we're nearly finished our twelve week program. 114 00:06:58,040 --> 00:07:00,000 Speaker 1: It's the same. When someone buys one of my books, 115 00:07:00,200 --> 00:07:03,160 Speaker 1: it's because they want to learn, or they want to evolve, 116 00:07:03,360 --> 00:07:05,960 Speaker 1: or they want to be prompted or motivated, or they 117 00:07:05,960 --> 00:07:11,680 Speaker 1: want to be informed. Because why because something's not working? 118 00:07:12,600 --> 00:07:15,720 Speaker 1: Why do people listen to this podcast? Well, for a 119 00:07:15,840 --> 00:07:18,520 Speaker 1: range of reasons, but one of the dominant reasons is 120 00:07:18,560 --> 00:07:22,120 Speaker 1: because there's shit I want to learn and understand and know. 121 00:07:22,240 --> 00:07:25,400 Speaker 1: Because there's stuff about me or my body, or my thinking, 122 00:07:25,520 --> 00:07:28,400 Speaker 1: or my habits or my life, or my behavior or 123 00:07:28,440 --> 00:07:33,240 Speaker 1: my outcomes or my relationships or my self talk all 124 00:07:33,240 --> 00:07:36,200 Speaker 1: my stories. There's something that I need to change. I 125 00:07:36,240 --> 00:07:39,320 Speaker 1: know I need to change, but by the way, I've 126 00:07:39,440 --> 00:07:41,680 Speaker 1: known that I've needed to change it for ten years 127 00:07:41,680 --> 00:07:47,800 Speaker 1: and I haven't. So that's the conversation. The conversation is 128 00:07:48,840 --> 00:07:52,400 Speaker 1: why not? How do I become the person that makes decision, 129 00:07:52,480 --> 00:07:57,720 Speaker 1: the decision that creates, the plan that implements, the plan 130 00:07:57,840 --> 00:08:00,840 Speaker 1: that does the work, that adapts to the bullshit, that 131 00:08:00,960 --> 00:08:04,400 Speaker 1: works around the messiness of life and the messiness of people, 132 00:08:04,880 --> 00:08:11,120 Speaker 1: and the messiness and uncertainty and unpredictability of things, events, happenings. 133 00:08:11,480 --> 00:08:13,640 Speaker 1: How do I be that person that, in the middle 134 00:08:13,720 --> 00:08:18,640 Speaker 1: of all of those uncontrollables and variables, me the controllable. 135 00:08:18,800 --> 00:08:22,720 Speaker 1: I can control me. I can control my behavior and 136 00:08:23,120 --> 00:08:27,320 Speaker 1: to an extent, my thoughts and my choices and my reactions. 137 00:08:28,000 --> 00:08:31,160 Speaker 1: How do I be the person that doesn't keep giving up? 138 00:08:32,080 --> 00:08:35,800 Speaker 1: And why am I not that person already? Do I 139 00:08:35,880 --> 00:08:38,160 Speaker 1: have a history of stopping and starting? This is a 140 00:08:38,240 --> 00:08:41,319 Speaker 1: question for you, the listener. Do you have a history? Again? 141 00:08:41,600 --> 00:08:45,320 Speaker 1: This is not about beating yourself up. This is just 142 00:08:45,360 --> 00:08:48,160 Speaker 1: about being honest. This is about being aware, This is 143 00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:51,840 Speaker 1: about going You know what I do? I keep stopping 144 00:08:51,880 --> 00:08:54,240 Speaker 1: and starting. I'm going to go welcome to a really 145 00:08:54,240 --> 00:08:57,200 Speaker 1: big club. That's okay. You're not bad, you're not broken, 146 00:08:57,240 --> 00:09:00,520 Speaker 1: you're not weird, You're human. Me too. I've spent a 147 00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:03,000 Speaker 1: lot of my life starting and stopping things that I 148 00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:06,040 Speaker 1: shouldn't have stopped. I should have just maintained. But did 149 00:09:06,040 --> 00:09:10,000 Speaker 1: I know? Am I broken and weird? No? I'm just 150 00:09:10,320 --> 00:09:12,800 Speaker 1: like you. We're the same. So the question is not 151 00:09:12,920 --> 00:09:16,360 Speaker 1: what's wrong with me? The question is what is it 152 00:09:17,080 --> 00:09:21,520 Speaker 1: that that precipitates this falling off the horse all the time? 153 00:09:21,720 --> 00:09:25,040 Speaker 1: Or off the wagon, the metaphoric wagon that doesn't exist? 154 00:09:25,760 --> 00:09:28,920 Speaker 1: What is that? So do I have a history of 155 00:09:28,960 --> 00:09:36,560 Speaker 1: stopping and starting? And what's really what's really stopped me? Like? 156 00:09:36,640 --> 00:09:40,320 Speaker 1: Why do I really give up? And if we're being 157 00:09:40,360 --> 00:09:44,400 Speaker 1: really honest, okay, I'll be really honest. Why have I 158 00:09:44,440 --> 00:09:48,000 Speaker 1: stopped in the past? Well, the main reason is it's 159 00:09:48,040 --> 00:09:56,080 Speaker 1: hard the end and it's hard. It's uncomfortable. Sometimes, it's impractical, 160 00:09:56,160 --> 00:09:59,959 Speaker 1: it's unfamiliar, it doesn't in the moment, it doesn't suit 161 00:10:00,200 --> 00:10:02,840 Speaker 1: me in the moment. You know what I want in 162 00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:06,160 Speaker 1: the moment. I want fucking cake, That's why. And I 163 00:10:06,240 --> 00:10:09,360 Speaker 1: know that in the moment I can gratify myself. I 164 00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:13,840 Speaker 1: can self gratify with cake. I can self gratify with chocolate, 165 00:10:13,920 --> 00:10:17,400 Speaker 1: milk and ice cream mixed in the blender. I can 166 00:10:17,440 --> 00:10:21,960 Speaker 1: self gratify with a hamburger with fucking white bread, sandwiches 167 00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:25,120 Speaker 1: with potato cakes and salt and pepper and cheese and sauce. 168 00:10:25,520 --> 00:10:28,400 Speaker 1: Oh fuck, I'm getting myself into a state as I speak, 169 00:10:28,920 --> 00:10:32,000 Speaker 1: come on, right, and I know that I can eat. 170 00:10:32,080 --> 00:10:34,560 Speaker 1: You know, I just talk about food because that's my issue, 171 00:10:35,120 --> 00:10:38,400 Speaker 1: not drugs, not booze. But for me, that's been my issue. 172 00:10:38,440 --> 00:10:40,360 Speaker 1: Why did I do it? Well, I did it. I 173 00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:44,840 Speaker 1: did it because it made me momentarily feel fucking amazing. 174 00:10:45,800 --> 00:10:48,840 Speaker 1: And so the biggest challenge for me, and dare I say, 175 00:10:48,880 --> 00:10:52,400 Speaker 1: the biggest challenge for many of you moving forward, brothers 176 00:10:52,440 --> 00:10:57,800 Speaker 1: and sisters, is our ability, Oh come on, our ability 177 00:10:58,440 --> 00:11:04,600 Speaker 1: to gratification, Our ability in the middle of that shit, 178 00:11:04,800 --> 00:11:07,920 Speaker 1: in the middle of that moment of fuck will I 179 00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,719 Speaker 1: won't I in the middle of that moment of temptation, 180 00:11:11,040 --> 00:11:13,640 Speaker 1: and that fucking no one's looking, no one will know 181 00:11:14,200 --> 00:11:16,720 Speaker 1: I deserve this. Like what we do is we have 182 00:11:16,840 --> 00:11:21,960 Speaker 1: this inner war where that we start to tell ourself 183 00:11:22,040 --> 00:11:24,520 Speaker 1: a story that we know is bullshit, and we start 184 00:11:24,559 --> 00:11:29,680 Speaker 1: to rationalize it. And usually the antidote or the justification is, 185 00:11:29,720 --> 00:11:33,760 Speaker 1: it's all right, it's just now. It's all right, I'll 186 00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:36,200 Speaker 1: go for a run later, or I'll start again tomorrow. 187 00:11:36,440 --> 00:11:39,360 Speaker 1: I'll be back on track tomorrow, and then it's July. 188 00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:44,200 Speaker 1: This is what we do. And the reason the reasons 189 00:11:44,240 --> 00:11:46,720 Speaker 1: that we do that are many. One of them is 190 00:11:46,760 --> 00:11:51,959 Speaker 1: that we are, in many ways hardwired for pleasure. We are, 191 00:11:52,840 --> 00:11:57,079 Speaker 1: and we are hardwired for instant gratification, and of course, 192 00:11:57,240 --> 00:12:01,120 Speaker 1: as do I, we just love feeling fucking great. But 193 00:12:01,160 --> 00:12:03,520 Speaker 1: the problem is that that feeling buck and great is 194 00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:10,319 Speaker 1: very short lived. Nobody who is out of shape or overweight, 195 00:12:10,559 --> 00:12:12,960 Speaker 1: or over fat or unhealthy, and I mean all of 196 00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:15,559 Speaker 1: these things with respect, because I have been all of those. 197 00:12:16,600 --> 00:12:21,000 Speaker 1: Nobody nobody goes and over indulges and then two hours 198 00:12:21,040 --> 00:12:25,120 Speaker 1: later feels great. Nobody, everybody either physically or emotionally or 199 00:12:25,160 --> 00:12:28,200 Speaker 1: psychologically or all of those, when they've just gone and 200 00:12:28,360 --> 00:12:31,439 Speaker 1: overeaten and eating a whole lot of food that their 201 00:12:31,480 --> 00:12:34,840 Speaker 1: body doesn't need, whether they've got this inner battle going 202 00:12:34,880 --> 00:12:38,000 Speaker 1: on because they simultaneously want to feel great in the moment, 203 00:12:38,040 --> 00:12:40,720 Speaker 1: but they also want to change their body over time. 204 00:12:41,240 --> 00:12:44,319 Speaker 1: Nobody feels great about that, and this is our challenge. 205 00:12:44,440 --> 00:12:49,200 Speaker 1: Our challenge is that well, one of the big challenges 206 00:12:49,200 --> 00:12:54,240 Speaker 1: with this is that the journey that we need to take. 207 00:12:54,320 --> 00:12:57,120 Speaker 1: This is why we talk about the narrow path, because 208 00:12:57,240 --> 00:13:00,680 Speaker 1: very few people take this journey, and this journey is 209 00:13:00,720 --> 00:13:03,440 Speaker 1: the I am not going to do that thing that 210 00:13:03,520 --> 00:13:08,360 Speaker 1: makes me feel momentarily good. But also what's not going 211 00:13:08,400 --> 00:13:11,400 Speaker 1: to happen is today I'm not going to change significantly. 212 00:13:12,360 --> 00:13:14,160 Speaker 1: I'm going to avoid the cake or I'm going to 213 00:13:14,200 --> 00:13:17,400 Speaker 1: avoid the chips and the potato cake sandwich. But I'm 214 00:13:17,400 --> 00:13:20,760 Speaker 1: not going to necessarily lose weight today. I'm not going 215 00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:23,679 Speaker 1: to wake up tomorrow and be ten kilos better off. 216 00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:26,319 Speaker 1: I'm not going to wake up tomorrow with abs because 217 00:13:26,840 --> 00:13:30,120 Speaker 1: my journey is maybe a three, six or twelve month 218 00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:32,720 Speaker 1: journey to get to the place where I feel and 219 00:13:32,760 --> 00:13:35,880 Speaker 1: look and function the way that I want. So what 220 00:13:35,960 --> 00:13:38,000 Speaker 1: I'll do is I'll just eat this shit right now 221 00:13:38,040 --> 00:13:41,600 Speaker 1: and I'll start tomorrow, and that dialogue will I will 222 00:13:41,600 --> 00:13:44,640 Speaker 1: eat this shit and start tomorrow. That becomes a record 223 00:13:44,679 --> 00:13:47,679 Speaker 1: in our brain that plays on repeat for fucking decades, 224 00:13:49,040 --> 00:13:52,640 Speaker 1: and some of you. I'm talking right to you. I'm 225 00:13:52,640 --> 00:13:55,320 Speaker 1: saying you need to take that record off that turntable, 226 00:13:55,360 --> 00:13:58,000 Speaker 1: smash it in a million pieces, and create a new 227 00:13:58,040 --> 00:14:02,440 Speaker 1: operating system. Also, we need to get to the point 228 00:14:03,240 --> 00:14:09,520 Speaker 1: where we stop looking for something or someone or some 229 00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:14,959 Speaker 1: pill or some program or some potion or some fucking 230 00:14:15,080 --> 00:14:19,560 Speaker 1: scientific breakthrough to do the work, to do the work, 231 00:14:20,480 --> 00:14:23,720 Speaker 1: because not only does doing the work ourselves create the 232 00:14:23,760 --> 00:14:27,880 Speaker 1: outcome that we want, the physical outcome, right, not only 233 00:14:27,920 --> 00:14:31,040 Speaker 1: does it create the outcome, but what it does it 234 00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:33,840 Speaker 1: also changes who we are and how we think, and 235 00:14:33,880 --> 00:14:39,120 Speaker 1: how we operate and how we do life. Because when 236 00:14:39,160 --> 00:14:43,360 Speaker 1: you finally get to the point where you go from 237 00:14:43,400 --> 00:14:46,440 Speaker 1: being the person who's going around and round and round 238 00:14:47,080 --> 00:14:50,360 Speaker 1: in this kind of groundhog day existence of starting and 239 00:14:50,400 --> 00:14:52,880 Speaker 1: stopping and losing a bit and gaining a bit, or 240 00:14:53,680 --> 00:14:56,600 Speaker 1: giving up cigarettes and taking them up or whatever. The 241 00:14:57,000 --> 00:14:59,240 Speaker 1: doesn't need to be anything about food or dope or 242 00:14:59,280 --> 00:15:03,040 Speaker 1: cigarettes or whose It could be some other destructive habit, right, 243 00:15:03,600 --> 00:15:06,160 Speaker 1: But when we keep going around and round and round 244 00:15:06,200 --> 00:15:10,640 Speaker 1: in circles, we just build an existence for ourselves that's 245 00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:16,160 Speaker 1: almost impossible to get out of. And time stands still, 246 00:15:17,360 --> 00:15:21,040 Speaker 1: you know, And at the same time, it flies and 247 00:15:21,080 --> 00:15:25,000 Speaker 1: we kind of lose perspective. And so for us, it's 248 00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:29,480 Speaker 1: really necessary to go. The answer is me, there is 249 00:15:29,560 --> 00:15:33,160 Speaker 1: no shortcut or hack or quick fix not to create 250 00:15:33,280 --> 00:15:40,040 Speaker 1: lasting change. And we are we are challenged because all 251 00:15:40,080 --> 00:15:47,240 Speaker 1: around us, you know, there would be many businesses, many businesses, 252 00:15:47,320 --> 00:15:52,560 Speaker 1: many products, many services, many people that would be out 253 00:15:52,600 --> 00:15:57,840 Speaker 1: of business. If everyone in Australia and around the world 254 00:15:58,320 --> 00:16:03,480 Speaker 1: stopped buying quick fix type services, a lot of businesses 255 00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:08,720 Speaker 1: would go broke tomorrow. Right if everyone stopped buying the shortcut, 256 00:16:08,800 --> 00:16:12,320 Speaker 1: the fat burner, that, the eight weeks of this, the 257 00:16:12,360 --> 00:16:15,920 Speaker 1: four days of that, the hack. This like, if everyone 258 00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:19,080 Speaker 1: just went, well, I've done. Let me see, I've tried 259 00:16:19,200 --> 00:16:23,480 Speaker 1: thirty seven different shortcuts, and here I am worse than 260 00:16:23,480 --> 00:16:26,440 Speaker 1: when I started, worse, not even in the same place. 261 00:16:26,480 --> 00:16:32,040 Speaker 1: I'm worse. So, after you do thirty seven shortcuts or 262 00:16:32,080 --> 00:16:36,440 Speaker 1: thirty seven miracle cures or pills, or you listen to 263 00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:40,440 Speaker 1: thirty seven gurus who will tell you how to get 264 00:16:40,480 --> 00:16:45,280 Speaker 1: the result without doing the work right, at some stage, 265 00:16:45,400 --> 00:16:47,600 Speaker 1: hopefully you get to the point where you go, oh, 266 00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:50,480 Speaker 1: they don't actually care about me. They just want my money. 267 00:16:51,240 --> 00:16:54,640 Speaker 1: And also not only don't they care about me, they 268 00:16:54,640 --> 00:17:00,080 Speaker 1: don't actually know me. And this is why sometimes I 269 00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:02,640 Speaker 1: polarize people for a range of reasons, because I say 270 00:17:02,800 --> 00:17:05,920 Speaker 1: fuck a million times. Probably that's part of it. Ah, 271 00:17:06,040 --> 00:17:10,640 Speaker 1: get over it, though. But the other part is because 272 00:17:13,960 --> 00:17:17,760 Speaker 1: my message is not sexy, yep. My message is not 273 00:17:17,960 --> 00:17:21,800 Speaker 1: feel good. My message is not oh yeah, you can 274 00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:25,520 Speaker 1: do anything. You can't fucking do anything. You can't. You 275 00:17:25,560 --> 00:17:27,760 Speaker 1: can't run one hundred meters in nine seconds. You can't 276 00:17:27,760 --> 00:17:29,640 Speaker 1: get up on the roof of the house and fly 277 00:17:29,840 --> 00:17:33,120 Speaker 1: to the house next door. You fucking can't. We can't 278 00:17:33,160 --> 00:17:36,240 Speaker 1: all become prime minister. We can't all be elite athletes. 279 00:17:36,280 --> 00:17:39,040 Speaker 1: We can't all be world famous singers. We can't for 280 00:17:39,080 --> 00:17:43,560 Speaker 1: a range of reasons. That's not negative, that's just fucking real. 281 00:17:44,320 --> 00:17:49,040 Speaker 1: But however, asterisk, we most of us can do a 282 00:17:49,080 --> 00:17:53,879 Speaker 1: lot more than we're currently doing. And so, you know, 283 00:17:54,040 --> 00:17:57,280 Speaker 1: I think we need to step out of the you know. 284 00:17:57,280 --> 00:18:04,639 Speaker 2: The the self help bullshit and into the practical reality 285 00:18:04,720 --> 00:18:08,560 Speaker 2: of Okay, I'm a grown ass man. 286 00:18:08,640 --> 00:18:12,240 Speaker 1: I'm a grown ass woman. I have if I'm being honest, 287 00:18:13,760 --> 00:18:16,560 Speaker 1: you know, I've been going around in circles with the 288 00:18:16,560 --> 00:18:20,480 Speaker 1: same issue for a very long time, and I've asked 289 00:18:20,480 --> 00:18:23,720 Speaker 1: a thousand people a thousand questions, and I've read this, 290 00:18:23,840 --> 00:18:25,520 Speaker 1: and I've done that, and I've tried this, and I 291 00:18:25,640 --> 00:18:32,320 Speaker 1: tried that. But nonetheless, here I am, and I'm still 292 00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:36,040 Speaker 1: doing the same thing that doesn't work. I'm still choosing 293 00:18:36,119 --> 00:18:40,600 Speaker 1: to do things. I am still consciously choosing to do 294 00:18:40,680 --> 00:18:46,879 Speaker 1: things which self sabotage my own goals. I am not 295 00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:51,879 Speaker 1: accidentally eating shit. I am choosing it. And the reason 296 00:18:51,920 --> 00:18:55,880 Speaker 1: that I'm choosing it is because I'm not fully committed 297 00:18:56,560 --> 00:19:00,320 Speaker 1: to the process of changing my life, habits, behaviors, out come. 298 00:19:01,400 --> 00:19:07,280 Speaker 1: Because being fully committed, Like, why do people commit to 299 00:19:07,400 --> 00:19:11,719 Speaker 1: twelve eight and ten week programs, Well, because they're twelve 300 00:19:11,800 --> 00:19:17,560 Speaker 1: eight and ten weeks long, that's why. Because it's short term, 301 00:19:17,800 --> 00:19:25,040 Speaker 1: because it's temporary, because I can stop, right, But why 302 00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:31,840 Speaker 1: don't people do forty year programs? What? What? What? Because 303 00:19:31,960 --> 00:19:35,119 Speaker 1: on a subconscious level, we want to get out of 304 00:19:35,240 --> 00:19:39,520 Speaker 1: jail card. We like the idea of looking permanently amazing 305 00:19:39,600 --> 00:19:42,840 Speaker 1: and having a permanently I'm talking about, you know, for 306 00:19:42,920 --> 00:19:46,160 Speaker 1: our potential. I'm not talking about instant model. I'm talking 307 00:19:46,200 --> 00:19:49,919 Speaker 1: about whoever you are, wherever you are, what you know 308 00:19:50,000 --> 00:19:52,040 Speaker 1: what eight or nine or ten out of ten out 309 00:19:52,040 --> 00:19:55,919 Speaker 1: of ten is for you, not compared to anyone. But 310 00:19:56,520 --> 00:19:59,679 Speaker 1: when we go okay, everyone put up your hand. If 311 00:19:59,720 --> 00:20:03,280 Speaker 1: you want permanent positive change, that is, you want to 312 00:20:03,280 --> 00:20:06,800 Speaker 1: look feel function good forever. Everyone puts up their hand. 313 00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:09,240 Speaker 1: Now put up your hand. If you're all going to 314 00:20:09,320 --> 00:20:16,680 Speaker 1: do the work required forever, the hands stay down. Why ah, well, ah, 315 00:20:18,560 --> 00:20:23,080 Speaker 1: because you've got to have a life. Oh yeah, that's it. 316 00:20:23,400 --> 00:20:25,359 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, Oh, there's my guy. You've got to have 317 00:20:25,400 --> 00:20:28,120 Speaker 1: a life. Okay, you've got to have a life. Let's 318 00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:31,120 Speaker 1: explore that. What does that mean? So does that mean 319 00:20:31,119 --> 00:20:33,600 Speaker 1: if you're not eating shit or getting pissed or falling 320 00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:36,840 Speaker 1: down or doing dumb things that are inconsistent with your 321 00:20:36,920 --> 00:20:41,360 Speaker 1: values of goals? Does that mean you're not living your 322 00:20:41,359 --> 00:20:44,560 Speaker 1: best life or you're not having a life. Oh no, no, 323 00:20:44,600 --> 00:20:46,399 Speaker 1: but that's you said to me, you've got to have 324 00:20:46,440 --> 00:20:49,960 Speaker 1: a life. So what does having a life mean? I 325 00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:52,800 Speaker 1: would suggest that having a life means walking around in 326 00:20:52,840 --> 00:20:55,200 Speaker 1: your best body, with your best health, your best mindset, 327 00:20:55,680 --> 00:20:58,320 Speaker 1: doing your best job, being in your best relationship, having 328 00:20:58,359 --> 00:21:01,080 Speaker 1: the best lifestyle. That doesn't mean it's all going to 329 00:21:01,080 --> 00:21:03,480 Speaker 1: be perfect, of course, because nothing is perfect, and no 330 00:21:03,600 --> 00:21:09,040 Speaker 1: one is perfect. But what's required for you to live 331 00:21:09,400 --> 00:21:13,800 Speaker 1: more optimally or more ideally, or more congruently, or more 332 00:21:13,840 --> 00:21:19,600 Speaker 1: authentically or more in alignment? You know, I believe that 333 00:21:20,400 --> 00:21:26,320 Speaker 1: there needs to be a deep, deep, deep, deep internal revolution, 334 00:21:27,880 --> 00:21:34,800 Speaker 1: not an external solution. A deep, deep internal revolution, not 335 00:21:34,880 --> 00:21:39,560 Speaker 1: an external solution, because I have seen people with not 336 00:21:39,760 --> 00:21:43,560 Speaker 1: much talent or potential or knowledge or resources or support. 337 00:21:44,119 --> 00:21:49,840 Speaker 1: I have seen many people do fucking unbelievable things when 338 00:21:49,880 --> 00:21:55,560 Speaker 1: they were one hundred percent committed to doing the work. Yep, 339 00:21:57,960 --> 00:22:02,080 Speaker 1: you and I spoke with a lady yesterday who Marie who. 340 00:22:02,320 --> 00:22:05,240 Speaker 1: I'm not sure the timeline of our episodes, but she'll 341 00:22:05,280 --> 00:22:08,080 Speaker 1: either be up soon or she was on recently. By 342 00:22:08,080 --> 00:22:10,159 Speaker 1: the time you guys hear this, I'd say she's probably 343 00:22:10,160 --> 00:22:14,800 Speaker 1: been on recently. But she literally fell down a mountain 344 00:22:15,080 --> 00:22:17,879 Speaker 1: four hundred and fifty meters and hit rocks all the 345 00:22:17,920 --> 00:22:23,160 Speaker 1: way and was given no chance of survival. They basically 346 00:22:23,200 --> 00:22:27,080 Speaker 1: went to retrieve her body. The rescue crew basically went 347 00:22:27,240 --> 00:22:29,199 Speaker 1: just to collect a body. They got there and she 348 00:22:29,320 --> 00:22:35,520 Speaker 1: wasn't dead obviously, and you know, I mean, she pretty 349 00:22:35,600 --> 00:22:38,720 Speaker 1: much broke everything in her body, you know, fifteen, ribs broke, 350 00:22:38,760 --> 00:22:41,840 Speaker 1: her spine, broke her neck, broke her pelvis, broke her foot, 351 00:22:42,880 --> 00:22:48,840 Speaker 1: had her kidney, her liver, her lungs shut down. She 352 00:22:48,880 --> 00:22:50,919 Speaker 1: was on eventilator, she was in a coma for a 353 00:22:50,960 --> 00:22:53,680 Speaker 1: month and a half. She was good, you know. And 354 00:22:54,359 --> 00:22:59,119 Speaker 1: now here's the thing. What's that skull? That's right skull? 355 00:22:59,200 --> 00:23:02,440 Speaker 1: She had an internal brain hemorrhage and external brain hemorrhage, 356 00:23:03,359 --> 00:23:06,640 Speaker 1: a form of a stroke. And here's the thing, right, 357 00:23:07,960 --> 00:23:10,760 Speaker 1: And we spoke to her as we're recording this, We 358 00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:16,240 Speaker 1: spoke to her yesterday. And what this woman, what this 359 00:23:16,440 --> 00:23:22,359 Speaker 1: fucking incredible, amazing, inspiring woman has been able to do 360 00:23:23,920 --> 00:23:30,159 Speaker 1: because she has just tapped into this fucking reservoir of 361 00:23:30,280 --> 00:23:35,320 Speaker 1: possibilities and potential that most of us don't tap into. 362 00:23:36,840 --> 00:23:41,880 Speaker 1: She is not gifted, she said it. She's not genetically gifted. 363 00:23:42,560 --> 00:23:46,440 Speaker 1: She's not. There's nothing special in inverted Commas about her 364 00:23:46,880 --> 00:23:52,520 Speaker 1: other than her thinking and her behaving, and all of 365 00:23:52,560 --> 00:23:56,960 Speaker 1: that is optional. Now. I know this sounds melodramatic, but 366 00:23:57,040 --> 00:23:59,360 Speaker 1: when I talk to people and they start to complain 367 00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:03,359 Speaker 1: about how hard their life is, I want them to 368 00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:07,160 Speaker 1: sit down with Marie and you can go, oh yeah, 369 00:24:07,200 --> 00:24:12,560 Speaker 1: but it's all relative. Maybe maybe, but guess what we're 370 00:24:12,640 --> 00:24:17,399 Speaker 1: all Where does our relative Where does our reality come from. 371 00:24:18,600 --> 00:24:21,840 Speaker 1: I'm not talking about our situation, circumstance, environment, I'm not 372 00:24:21,880 --> 00:24:25,160 Speaker 1: talking about our external world. I'm talking about our internal reality. 373 00:24:25,520 --> 00:24:29,639 Speaker 1: It comes largely from our stories. And if our story 374 00:24:29,720 --> 00:24:32,639 Speaker 1: is I deserve this piece of cake or whatever. And 375 00:24:32,680 --> 00:24:35,400 Speaker 1: by the way, I'm not anti cake or pizza. I'm 376 00:24:35,400 --> 00:24:38,240 Speaker 1: not saying, whatever your issue is, you need to apply 377 00:24:38,359 --> 00:24:41,119 Speaker 1: this principle or you don't need to do anything. But 378 00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:44,199 Speaker 1: I'm talking about applying these ideas and principles to your challenge. 379 00:24:44,200 --> 00:24:46,359 Speaker 1: It might have nothing to do with food or your body. 380 00:24:46,359 --> 00:24:49,960 Speaker 1: It could be something else. But what I know, and 381 00:24:49,960 --> 00:24:52,080 Speaker 1: I've seen it time and time again, like with Johnny 382 00:24:52,119 --> 00:24:53,840 Speaker 1: that got blown up, with my old man that had 383 00:24:53,880 --> 00:24:56,760 Speaker 1: a heart attack and died three times, like with Marie 384 00:24:56,760 --> 00:25:00,600 Speaker 1: that fell down a mountain, that normal people can do 385 00:25:00,800 --> 00:25:05,760 Speaker 1: fucking incredible things when they have a story in their 386 00:25:05,840 --> 00:25:10,520 Speaker 1: mind that says, oh, this is not optional anymore. This 387 00:25:10,640 --> 00:25:12,880 Speaker 1: is not something I'm going to do if I'm inspired 388 00:25:12,960 --> 00:25:15,360 Speaker 1: or motivated. This is something that I'm going to do. 389 00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:20,159 Speaker 1: That thing that I used to do, I don't do 390 00:25:20,320 --> 00:25:24,239 Speaker 1: that anymore. I don't do that anymore. This is my 391 00:25:24,720 --> 00:25:28,399 Speaker 1: new normal. This is not only is this my new normal. 392 00:25:28,480 --> 00:25:31,959 Speaker 1: I don't have a choice. Now I can't do the 393 00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:34,720 Speaker 1: things I used to do. I literally can't do the 394 00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:37,080 Speaker 1: things I used to do. So now I have to 395 00:25:37,119 --> 00:25:41,439 Speaker 1: adjust and adapt to build this new life. And what 396 00:25:41,480 --> 00:25:44,880 Speaker 1: I have said many times is we see what happens 397 00:25:44,880 --> 00:25:49,720 Speaker 1: when people are backed into a corner through medical reasons 398 00:25:49,880 --> 00:25:55,000 Speaker 1: or some kind of life threatening experience or some kind 399 00:25:55,040 --> 00:26:01,320 Speaker 1: of catastrophe. We see repeatedly who have not been able 400 00:26:01,359 --> 00:26:04,320 Speaker 1: to do certain things turn their habits, thinking, life, and 401 00:26:04,359 --> 00:26:08,920 Speaker 1: behaviors around almost in a day because they had an experience. 402 00:26:10,240 --> 00:26:15,080 Speaker 1: So what that tells us is that ability was always there. 403 00:26:16,240 --> 00:26:20,800 Speaker 1: What happened in the experience, Well, what happened was there 404 00:26:20,880 --> 00:26:25,399 Speaker 1: was a complete shift in thinking. Because the mind is 405 00:26:25,440 --> 00:26:32,439 Speaker 1: the driver. The mind is the driver. Somebody said to 406 00:26:32,480 --> 00:26:35,320 Speaker 1: me yesterday, how are you going with your PhD? And 407 00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:39,760 Speaker 1: I went, yeah, you know, it's it's it's work, you know, 408 00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:44,040 Speaker 1: And they're like, do you regret starting it? I went no, 409 00:26:45,000 --> 00:26:46,960 Speaker 1: and they went, is it as hard as you thought 410 00:26:46,960 --> 00:26:49,720 Speaker 1: it would be? And I went harder And I thought 411 00:26:49,760 --> 00:26:54,080 Speaker 1: it would be hard, and They're like if if you 412 00:26:54,080 --> 00:26:56,000 Speaker 1: were going to start, like if you didn't have it 413 00:26:56,040 --> 00:26:59,080 Speaker 1: and you got the would you if you started again, Like, 414 00:26:59,160 --> 00:27:01,720 Speaker 1: would you do it again? I go one hundred percent yep, 415 00:27:02,400 --> 00:27:09,040 Speaker 1: you know, And so like I I'm constantly learning new things, 416 00:27:09,280 --> 00:27:13,240 Speaker 1: and I'm constantly and it's not even about my area 417 00:27:13,240 --> 00:27:15,840 Speaker 1: of research that I'm learning so much. I'm learning, of 418 00:27:15,880 --> 00:27:18,560 Speaker 1: course because I'm studying and I'm doing a literature review 419 00:27:18,600 --> 00:27:23,280 Speaker 1: with lots of other kind of insecting psychological theories and 420 00:27:23,480 --> 00:27:27,280 Speaker 1: constructs and how they interact or intersect or relate to 421 00:27:27,320 --> 00:27:30,520 Speaker 1: my stuff. All that. All the psychology. That's cool, that's 422 00:27:30,720 --> 00:27:36,359 Speaker 1: relatively interesting, sorry, relatively easy. It's very interesting. It's relatively easy. 423 00:27:36,760 --> 00:27:40,040 Speaker 1: But what's hard for me is learning how to load 424 00:27:40,119 --> 00:27:43,680 Speaker 1: one hundred surveys into qualtrics and learn all of these 425 00:27:43,720 --> 00:27:46,919 Speaker 1: programs and all of this technology and learn how to 426 00:27:47,000 --> 00:27:50,800 Speaker 1: do you know. It's it's the because I'm fifty seven 427 00:27:50,880 --> 00:27:54,800 Speaker 1: and not twenty seven. It's all the technology and all 428 00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:59,560 Speaker 1: the stuff that you know, Like even last time I 429 00:27:59,600 --> 00:28:03,600 Speaker 1: studied university was twenty years ago, and that you know, 430 00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:05,760 Speaker 1: there were still computers around, but it was still very 431 00:28:05,840 --> 00:28:08,479 Speaker 1: I mean, we still literally had a library full of books. 432 00:28:09,160 --> 00:28:11,919 Speaker 1: Where I am there's no library. There are no books. 433 00:28:13,119 --> 00:28:15,920 Speaker 1: There's no physical library. There's not Oh, let's walk into 434 00:28:16,000 --> 00:28:19,720 Speaker 1: the because nobody uses them. Not where I'm at anyway, 435 00:28:19,760 --> 00:28:24,480 Speaker 1: not not at PhD level. It's all online academic journals. 436 00:28:24,720 --> 00:28:27,960 Speaker 1: You know, it's different. But I think once you go, 437 00:28:28,800 --> 00:28:31,560 Speaker 1: and by the way, could I fuck up and fail? 438 00:28:31,640 --> 00:28:36,280 Speaker 1: I could? I hope I don't, but I'm practical. I go, Well, 439 00:28:36,320 --> 00:28:39,200 Speaker 1: of course it's hard. It's a fucking PhD. Of course 440 00:28:39,240 --> 00:28:42,520 Speaker 1: it's hard. Of Course you're tired. Of course it sucks. 441 00:28:42,640 --> 00:28:45,800 Speaker 1: Of course, it's long hours. Of course, it's a massive commitment. 442 00:28:45,840 --> 00:28:49,400 Speaker 1: You're not doing a fucking you know, you're not doing 443 00:28:49,400 --> 00:28:53,240 Speaker 1: a four week tafe course in fucking cake making. God 444 00:28:53,280 --> 00:28:56,360 Speaker 1: bless all the cake makers. You know. It's like, this 445 00:28:56,560 --> 00:28:59,400 Speaker 1: is what you took on, you fucking idiot. So that's 446 00:28:59,440 --> 00:29:02,840 Speaker 1: what's record why I don't complain. So I don't complain. 447 00:29:02,960 --> 00:29:05,400 Speaker 1: I just but if someone says to me, is it hard, 448 00:29:05,440 --> 00:29:08,480 Speaker 1: I'll tell them the truth. Yeah. Is it exhausting, yeap? 449 00:29:08,880 --> 00:29:11,160 Speaker 1: You know, would you do it again? Yep? And you 450 00:29:11,200 --> 00:29:13,960 Speaker 1: know why I do it again because one in a 451 00:29:14,000 --> 00:29:17,440 Speaker 1: weird way, it is fun in a weird way. I 452 00:29:17,760 --> 00:29:20,920 Speaker 1: kind of sometimes pain is fun, you know, but also 453 00:29:21,120 --> 00:29:25,640 Speaker 1: what it's doing is it's I'm developing new skills, I'm 454 00:29:25,720 --> 00:29:30,200 Speaker 1: learning a new language. I'm you know, it's like, you know, 455 00:29:30,280 --> 00:29:33,040 Speaker 1: if you break your life into pretend your life as 456 00:29:33,080 --> 00:29:35,840 Speaker 1: a whole bunch of rooms, you know, it's just your 457 00:29:35,840 --> 00:29:38,400 Speaker 1: life is a composite of different rooms. And one room 458 00:29:38,440 --> 00:29:41,080 Speaker 1: you go in and there's your family. There's your mum 459 00:29:41,080 --> 00:29:44,720 Speaker 1: and dad, Melissa, and your sister and your brother in 460 00:29:44,800 --> 00:29:48,520 Speaker 1: Laura and Hugo and what's her name, the little one, 461 00:29:49,120 --> 00:29:53,880 Speaker 1: not Hugo, don't tell me, Olivia and Alexander. Yeah, And 462 00:29:53,920 --> 00:29:55,440 Speaker 1: you know, that's one room. And then you go to 463 00:29:55,480 --> 00:29:57,120 Speaker 1: another room and there's work, and then you go to 464 00:29:57,160 --> 00:30:00,480 Speaker 1: another room. And you know, depending on where you're you 465 00:30:00,640 --> 00:30:03,440 Speaker 1: kind of you have different levels of experience or different 466 00:30:03,560 --> 00:30:06,360 Speaker 1: kinds of experience. So, for example, when I come into 467 00:30:06,360 --> 00:30:08,760 Speaker 1: the podcast room, which is one of the rooms in 468 00:30:09,040 --> 00:30:12,120 Speaker 1: the house, that is my life. You know, it's fun, 469 00:30:12,200 --> 00:30:16,320 Speaker 1: it's enjoyable, there's a level of confidence and competence because 470 00:30:16,360 --> 00:30:20,040 Speaker 1: I've done this many, many, many many times, and before that, 471 00:30:20,120 --> 00:30:22,520 Speaker 1: I did a lot of radio, and so I come 472 00:30:22,560 --> 00:30:26,040 Speaker 1: in here and as objective as I can be. I go, 473 00:30:26,240 --> 00:30:28,960 Speaker 1: I'm not bad at this, I'm okay at this. This 474 00:30:29,000 --> 00:30:31,280 Speaker 1: is what I do. But then I walk into the 475 00:30:31,400 --> 00:30:36,920 Speaker 1: PhD room in my life and I'm like fucking l 476 00:30:37,040 --> 00:30:41,480 Speaker 1: plates on and training wheels and falling down and getting 477 00:30:41,600 --> 00:30:45,640 Speaker 1: up and bumping into things and asking dumb questions. But 478 00:30:45,760 --> 00:30:48,440 Speaker 1: that's the room that I'm in when I'm doing academia. 479 00:30:48,480 --> 00:30:51,640 Speaker 1: Then I go into the public speaking room that is 480 00:30:51,680 --> 00:30:53,720 Speaker 1: part of my life. I go, I'm not bad here either. 481 00:30:53,760 --> 00:30:56,600 Speaker 1: I've done this a lot. I'm okay, you know. Then 482 00:30:56,640 --> 00:31:00,160 Speaker 1: I go into the you know, the Managing my body room, 483 00:31:00,440 --> 00:31:04,480 Speaker 1: and you know bits of that. There are different cupboards 484 00:31:04,520 --> 00:31:08,320 Speaker 1: in that room. There's the exercise cupboard, there's the food cupboard, 485 00:31:08,360 --> 00:31:10,840 Speaker 1: there's the lifestyle cupboard. So even in that room, there 486 00:31:10,880 --> 00:31:14,080 Speaker 1: are subrooms, you know. And this is the thing. Like 487 00:31:14,200 --> 00:31:16,600 Speaker 1: what we do is we tend to stay in the 488 00:31:16,680 --> 00:31:20,360 Speaker 1: rooms where we're most comfortable. What the byproduct of that 489 00:31:20,520 --> 00:31:23,040 Speaker 1: is we don't grow. The byproduct of that is when 490 00:31:23,240 --> 00:31:26,520 Speaker 1: we get forced into another room where fucked because we 491 00:31:26,600 --> 00:31:29,959 Speaker 1: never leave our own room. We love being safe and 492 00:31:30,000 --> 00:31:33,600 Speaker 1: comfortable and familiar and predictable, and we love but this 493 00:31:33,760 --> 00:31:36,960 Speaker 1: is the thing, like when you are stepping out of 494 00:31:37,120 --> 00:31:40,720 Speaker 1: back to our topic, when you are stepping out of 495 00:31:40,880 --> 00:31:45,360 Speaker 1: a behavioral program that doesn't work, or a habit that 496 00:31:45,400 --> 00:31:49,760 Speaker 1: doesn't work, or a lifestyle that doesn't work, or a 497 00:31:49,840 --> 00:31:54,400 Speaker 1: situation that doesn't work, you're stepping into new territory, and 498 00:31:54,480 --> 00:31:58,000 Speaker 1: part of your brain will fight that. Part of your 499 00:31:58,040 --> 00:32:00,800 Speaker 1: brain will fight that because your brain's Fuck, we're not 500 00:32:00,840 --> 00:32:03,920 Speaker 1: sure what's going on over here, so get fucked. Let's 501 00:32:03,960 --> 00:32:05,280 Speaker 1: go back to the couch that we know. 502 00:32:05,640 --> 00:32:08,680 Speaker 3: Yeah, and also, all of a sudden, it's not as 503 00:32:08,800 --> 00:32:11,120 Speaker 3: exciting as it seemed in your head when you were 504 00:32:11,160 --> 00:32:13,920 Speaker 3: picturing it or thinking about it to begin with. In 505 00:32:13,960 --> 00:32:17,000 Speaker 3: the reality of when you're trying to do whatever that 506 00:32:17,120 --> 00:32:20,680 Speaker 3: task is and you're in today forty seven of an 507 00:32:20,680 --> 00:32:23,320 Speaker 3: ongoing journey, it's nowhere near as fun. 508 00:32:24,080 --> 00:32:27,440 Speaker 1: But it has to be done exactly. That's right then, 509 00:32:27,480 --> 00:32:31,160 Speaker 1: And we've spoken many times about you know, the practical 510 00:32:31,200 --> 00:32:35,880 Speaker 1: reality that motivation is temporary, and motivation is certainly valuable 511 00:32:36,080 --> 00:32:39,280 Speaker 1: when it's there, but we know that some people stay 512 00:32:39,360 --> 00:32:42,240 Speaker 1: motivated for three hours, some people three days, some three weeks, 513 00:32:42,240 --> 00:32:46,640 Speaker 1: but nobody stays permanently motivated like in that state of 514 00:32:46,720 --> 00:32:53,440 Speaker 1: motivat in that emotional that heightened emotional state of excitement anticipation. 515 00:32:54,440 --> 00:32:58,560 Speaker 1: You know, nobody stays in that state permanently. People have 516 00:32:58,600 --> 00:33:01,160 Speaker 1: peaks and troughs and good and bad days, and so 517 00:33:01,280 --> 00:33:04,760 Speaker 1: we go, all right, well, let's acknowledge the impermanence of 518 00:33:04,800 --> 00:33:09,800 Speaker 1: that state. Now, how do we create the permanence of 519 00:33:09,880 --> 00:33:16,920 Speaker 1: this habit? How do I the dude who starts and 520 00:33:17,000 --> 00:33:21,400 Speaker 1: stops and who is or has been dependent on motivation 521 00:33:21,640 --> 00:33:25,680 Speaker 1: to get there? How do I become? How do I 522 00:33:25,760 --> 00:33:30,760 Speaker 1: discard that addiction? How do I discard that dependence? So 523 00:33:30,880 --> 00:33:33,480 Speaker 1: if it's there, I'll use it because it's a great tool. 524 00:33:33,800 --> 00:33:38,640 Speaker 1: But when it's not there, so, you know, becoming ungive 525 00:33:38,720 --> 00:33:43,000 Speaker 1: upable is about how do I keep doing what I 526 00:33:43,120 --> 00:33:47,760 Speaker 1: need to do to live my purpose or my values 527 00:33:47,880 --> 00:33:51,120 Speaker 1: or my goals, or to create my optimal outcomes, or 528 00:33:51,160 --> 00:33:54,440 Speaker 1: to be aligned to who I say I want to become? 529 00:33:55,200 --> 00:33:57,360 Speaker 1: How do I do that when I can't be fucked? 530 00:33:57,400 --> 00:33:59,920 Speaker 1: How do I do that when everyone else would give? 531 00:34:00,280 --> 00:34:02,280 Speaker 1: How do I do that when I would have given 532 00:34:02,360 --> 00:34:04,520 Speaker 1: up in the past? How do I do that when 533 00:34:04,520 --> 00:34:07,400 Speaker 1: I don't? In inverted commas want to in the moment, 534 00:34:07,800 --> 00:34:11,719 Speaker 1: How do I do that? And this is why just 535 00:34:12,000 --> 00:34:18,080 Speaker 1: trying a new program doesn't work, because it's about our 536 00:34:18,120 --> 00:34:22,239 Speaker 1: default setting. It's about what's happening in us. You can 537 00:34:22,280 --> 00:34:25,720 Speaker 1: do all the programs, and this is why some people 538 00:34:25,719 --> 00:34:28,919 Speaker 1: get results on one program and other people don't get 539 00:34:28,960 --> 00:34:32,400 Speaker 1: results on the same program, because if it was about 540 00:34:32,520 --> 00:34:36,680 Speaker 1: the program, everyone would get the same outcome. It's about 541 00:34:36,719 --> 00:34:43,000 Speaker 1: the individuals doing the program. You know. I I might 542 00:34:43,000 --> 00:34:46,239 Speaker 1: have mentioned this once before, but I read something the 543 00:34:46,280 --> 00:34:48,440 Speaker 1: other day and it's in one of the groups that 544 00:34:50,400 --> 00:34:53,920 Speaker 1: or I need to not get myself in trouble. But anyway, 545 00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:58,759 Speaker 1: I'll just say it. Someone posted I don't know if 546 00:34:58,760 --> 00:35:00,719 Speaker 1: I said this to you might have been for I 547 00:35:00,719 --> 00:35:02,439 Speaker 1: don't know. I can't remember all the shit I say, 548 00:35:02,440 --> 00:35:05,760 Speaker 1: but anyway, it's worth repeating. So somebody was coming towards 549 00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:12,040 Speaker 1: the end of their twelve weeks of Body Challenge program 550 00:35:12,520 --> 00:35:15,200 Speaker 1: and they were doing their final photos and the caption 551 00:35:15,560 --> 00:35:21,319 Speaker 1: was is it pizza o'clock yet? Oh? The caption wise, 552 00:35:21,400 --> 00:35:23,840 Speaker 1: you know here in my final photos? Is it pizza 553 00:35:24,160 --> 00:35:28,000 Speaker 1: o'clock yet? Right? So, and by the way, this person 554 00:35:28,040 --> 00:35:32,120 Speaker 1: looked amazing. But isn't it funny that we do this 555 00:35:32,239 --> 00:35:35,799 Speaker 1: temporary thing eighty four days, and we look different, and 556 00:35:35,840 --> 00:35:39,040 Speaker 1: we change our eating and we change our exercise, and 557 00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:43,440 Speaker 1: we change our regime and our operating system, and we change, 558 00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:47,480 Speaker 1: you know, what we're doing day to day. But the 559 00:35:47,520 --> 00:35:50,520 Speaker 1: one thing that this person posts about is going and 560 00:35:50,560 --> 00:35:55,359 Speaker 1: eating junk food. Now, wow, now I'm puh right. And 561 00:35:55,400 --> 00:35:59,040 Speaker 1: it's not about the pizza. It's about the thinking. It's 562 00:35:59,040 --> 00:36:03,000 Speaker 1: about the why you rewarding yourself with food that you 563 00:36:03,120 --> 00:36:07,759 Speaker 1: avoided for the last eighty four days. Now you avoided 564 00:36:07,800 --> 00:36:11,880 Speaker 1: that food for a reason. The reason is you wanted 565 00:36:11,880 --> 00:36:13,840 Speaker 1: to change your body and how you looked and felt 566 00:36:13,880 --> 00:36:16,440 Speaker 1: and functioned. And you did, and now you look good 567 00:36:17,520 --> 00:36:20,120 Speaker 1: and now you feel good, and now you're functioning well. 568 00:36:20,800 --> 00:36:26,440 Speaker 1: And now you're rewarding yourself with that thing that is 569 00:36:26,560 --> 00:36:30,120 Speaker 1: actually at odds with what you've been doing. Yeah, you know, 570 00:36:30,200 --> 00:36:32,759 Speaker 1: and this thinking, this, I'm going to reward myself with 571 00:36:32,920 --> 00:36:35,759 Speaker 1: shit that so fucking annoys me. If you want to 572 00:36:35,800 --> 00:36:39,520 Speaker 1: eat shit, eat shit, but don't motivate yourself with an 573 00:36:39,600 --> 00:36:44,080 Speaker 1: unhealthy goal or an unhealthy target, it makes no sense 574 00:36:44,200 --> 00:36:47,760 Speaker 1: to me. But the problem is that we have a story, 575 00:36:47,800 --> 00:36:50,320 Speaker 1: and the story is Yeah, but if I don't eat pizza, 576 00:36:50,400 --> 00:36:52,040 Speaker 1: or if I don't eat cake, or if I don't 577 00:36:52,120 --> 00:36:56,520 Speaker 1: drink boozel, then I'm missing out. Let me tell you pizza. 578 00:36:57,000 --> 00:36:58,760 Speaker 1: By the way, can you have some pizza or booze 579 00:36:58,800 --> 00:37:02,200 Speaker 1: or cake? Of course you can. I've never been against 580 00:37:02,280 --> 00:37:05,279 Speaker 1: any of those things. When I talk about food, I'm 581 00:37:05,360 --> 00:37:10,000 Speaker 1: always talking about the story, the story that we have 582 00:37:10,080 --> 00:37:14,960 Speaker 1: about food, because the story opens the door on the problem. 583 00:37:15,280 --> 00:37:18,800 Speaker 1: If the story is I'm rewarding myself with pizza because 584 00:37:18,800 --> 00:37:23,399 Speaker 1: I haven't eaten pizza for eighty four days, that's a worry. 585 00:37:23,520 --> 00:37:25,839 Speaker 1: Because if we said to that person who now looks 586 00:37:25,840 --> 00:37:29,040 Speaker 1: amazing after eighty four days, would you like to look 587 00:37:29,080 --> 00:37:31,279 Speaker 1: good for eighty four days or would you like to 588 00:37:31,320 --> 00:37:35,279 Speaker 1: look good forever? They're going to say forever. Then I'm 589 00:37:35,280 --> 00:37:38,560 Speaker 1: going to say, why are you opening the door on 590 00:37:38,600 --> 00:37:41,200 Speaker 1: this thing that probably I don't know about this person, 591 00:37:41,320 --> 00:37:45,680 Speaker 1: But most people who do these programs, including me, I 592 00:37:45,680 --> 00:37:48,000 Speaker 1: don't do the programs, but I'm putting myself in this group. 593 00:37:48,480 --> 00:37:52,600 Speaker 1: Most people have had or do have issues with food, 594 00:37:53,160 --> 00:37:58,040 Speaker 1: issues with weight, issues with appearance, right, and we know 595 00:37:58,200 --> 00:38:03,560 Speaker 1: that managing ourselves around food that's not ideal is part 596 00:38:03,600 --> 00:38:08,839 Speaker 1: of the problem. Right, And this is why I love 597 00:38:08,880 --> 00:38:11,839 Speaker 1: and hate twelve week, ten week, eight week programs. It's 598 00:38:11,880 --> 00:38:14,440 Speaker 1: why I love and hate them. I love them because 599 00:38:15,239 --> 00:38:17,680 Speaker 1: they can be the beginning of something. They can be 600 00:38:17,719 --> 00:38:21,520 Speaker 1: the start of something amazing and transformative. And their structure 601 00:38:21,520 --> 00:38:25,040 Speaker 1: and process and accountability, which are all good things. There's camaraderie, 602 00:38:25,080 --> 00:38:29,799 Speaker 1: which is good, there's social connection, which is good. But 603 00:38:29,880 --> 00:38:34,120 Speaker 1: there's also this subconscious knowing that, oh, I'm finished in 604 00:38:34,160 --> 00:38:37,319 Speaker 1: three weeks, I'm finished in two weeks, I'm finished in 605 00:38:37,360 --> 00:38:41,919 Speaker 1: a week, I'm finished today. Is it pizza o'clock now? Right? 606 00:38:42,200 --> 00:38:44,920 Speaker 1: And this is just the reality. And this is the problem. 607 00:38:45,880 --> 00:38:48,400 Speaker 1: This is the problem. That food is not the problem. 608 00:38:49,360 --> 00:38:52,400 Speaker 1: Our weight is not the problem. What the number between 609 00:38:52,440 --> 00:38:55,440 Speaker 1: our toes is not the problem. Our health state is 610 00:38:55,440 --> 00:38:58,680 Speaker 1: not the problem. They are all just the consequences of 611 00:38:58,719 --> 00:39:03,040 Speaker 1: the problem. The problem is that we don't fully commit. 612 00:39:03,840 --> 00:39:06,960 Speaker 1: The problem is that we give up. Call it what 613 00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:09,400 Speaker 1: you will, We give up, we stop, we throw in 614 00:39:09,440 --> 00:39:13,600 Speaker 1: the towel again, I said earlier in the show, there's 615 00:39:13,600 --> 00:39:16,120 Speaker 1: a time to stop. Oh you've got a medical issue, 616 00:39:16,160 --> 00:39:19,479 Speaker 1: you've been advised not to, you're in pain. All good, 617 00:39:19,719 --> 00:39:22,880 Speaker 1: They're not excuses and they're not giving up. They're legit reasons. 618 00:39:23,600 --> 00:39:31,480 Speaker 1: Reasons are reasons, tick, but excuses are not reasons. Bullshit 619 00:39:31,600 --> 00:39:36,880 Speaker 1: stories are not reasons. And when I get people tell me, 620 00:39:37,120 --> 00:39:39,680 Speaker 1: I would say two in ten it's a legit reason. 621 00:39:39,920 --> 00:39:42,800 Speaker 1: Eight in ten it's bullshit. Ye, or it's a version 622 00:39:42,840 --> 00:39:45,880 Speaker 1: of bullshit. And I know because I'm the biggest bullshitter. 623 00:39:46,440 --> 00:39:49,319 Speaker 1: I spent the vast majority of myself lying, of my 624 00:39:49,400 --> 00:39:53,640 Speaker 1: time of my life lying lying, And so I'm being 625 00:39:53,680 --> 00:39:56,439 Speaker 1: honest about my lying. Did I lie to myself? Yes? 626 00:39:57,480 --> 00:40:00,320 Speaker 1: Did I lie to other people about my own habits 627 00:40:00,320 --> 00:40:04,760 Speaker 1: and behaviors? One hundred percent? I did. And it takes 628 00:40:04,840 --> 00:40:08,799 Speaker 1: courage to say that because it's embarrassing and it's humiliating. 629 00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:12,560 Speaker 1: But you know what else it is. It's honest. It's honest. 630 00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:15,839 Speaker 1: And I can get defensive and go, oh yeah, but 631 00:40:15,880 --> 00:40:18,799 Speaker 1: you don't but fuck and you get fucked and you 632 00:40:18,800 --> 00:40:21,640 Speaker 1: get rooted and you or I can go nah, there 633 00:40:22,000 --> 00:40:25,280 Speaker 1: is I'm the problem. I'm the problem, not self loathing, 634 00:40:25,600 --> 00:40:29,000 Speaker 1: just self awareness. I'm the problem. You know what? When 635 00:40:29,040 --> 00:40:31,320 Speaker 1: I ate myself to one hundred and twenty kilos or 636 00:40:31,320 --> 00:40:36,200 Speaker 1: thereabouts compared to my current eighty three nobody had a 637 00:40:36,239 --> 00:40:40,359 Speaker 1: gun to my head. I was. I owned gyms when 638 00:40:40,400 --> 00:40:44,279 Speaker 1: I was doing that. I was an exercise scientist, for 639 00:40:44,360 --> 00:40:46,640 Speaker 1: God's sake, I was a personal trainer. I was a 640 00:40:46,680 --> 00:40:51,040 Speaker 1: gym owner. I was educated, I was intelligent. I had resources, 641 00:40:51,080 --> 00:40:54,960 Speaker 1: I had information, I had access to everything that I needed, 642 00:40:55,239 --> 00:41:02,200 Speaker 1: and I ate my way to obesity. Nobody's faults but me, Oh, 643 00:41:02,239 --> 00:41:05,080 Speaker 1: you shouldn't be hating yourself. I'm not fucking hating myself. 644 00:41:06,040 --> 00:41:09,160 Speaker 1: I'm telling the truth, like just the truth. There's no 645 00:41:09,280 --> 00:41:13,360 Speaker 1: self loathing, just self awareness. And this is the problem. 646 00:41:13,560 --> 00:41:16,880 Speaker 1: We're so fucking precious that nobody wants to own up 647 00:41:16,920 --> 00:41:22,200 Speaker 1: to anything because they feel like they're hating themselves or 648 00:41:22,320 --> 00:41:24,120 Speaker 1: someone else is going to go TI, but you did 649 00:41:24,160 --> 00:41:27,840 Speaker 1: your best, bullshit, You fucking didn't do your best, because 650 00:41:27,880 --> 00:41:32,279 Speaker 1: your best is your best is a better outcome. I 651 00:41:32,320 --> 00:41:37,120 Speaker 1: didn't do my best hardly ever, and you know this 652 00:41:37,200 --> 00:41:38,840 Speaker 1: is the thing. Of course, there are going to be 653 00:41:38,880 --> 00:41:42,160 Speaker 1: times when you know when you are trying and it's 654 00:41:42,239 --> 00:41:44,880 Speaker 1: not working. Of course I'm not talking about that, but 655 00:41:44,920 --> 00:41:46,919 Speaker 1: I'm just going we need to get to the point where, 656 00:41:46,960 --> 00:41:49,760 Speaker 1: at some stage, and this is why I go around 657 00:41:49,760 --> 00:41:51,760 Speaker 1: in circles and I go, hey, you go read whatever 658 00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:54,399 Speaker 1: book you want, do whatever program you want, buy whatever pill, 659 00:41:54,440 --> 00:41:57,719 Speaker 1: powder potion you want. Cool, and then in five years, 660 00:41:57,760 --> 00:41:59,239 Speaker 1: when you're in the same place, come back to me 661 00:41:59,239 --> 00:42:01,279 Speaker 1: and let's have a chat. And by the way, I'm 662 00:42:01,280 --> 00:42:03,319 Speaker 1: not the answer. And by the way, my podcast is 663 00:42:03,360 --> 00:42:05,680 Speaker 1: not the answer. And by the way, my programs and 664 00:42:05,719 --> 00:42:09,040 Speaker 1: books they're not the answer. They're just resources. And anyone 665 00:42:09,040 --> 00:42:11,680 Speaker 1: who tells you that you are not the answer to 666 00:42:11,719 --> 00:42:15,600 Speaker 1: your own problems, they're scamming you. They want your money, 667 00:42:15,640 --> 00:42:19,880 Speaker 1: they want your dough. I'm telling you you, your brain, 668 00:42:20,320 --> 00:42:25,759 Speaker 1: your choices, your resilience, your mental toughness, your attitude, your 669 00:42:25,800 --> 00:42:31,160 Speaker 1: decision making, that is the solution. That is the solution. 670 00:42:31,640 --> 00:42:36,200 Speaker 1: You are the solution. And until you maybe hit rock bottom, 671 00:42:36,200 --> 00:42:39,000 Speaker 1: which I hope you don't need to, maybe you're not 672 00:42:39,040 --> 00:42:42,600 Speaker 1: going to change. I'm telling you a lot of people 673 00:42:42,640 --> 00:42:45,200 Speaker 1: don't change till they hit rock bottom. The other thing 674 00:42:45,200 --> 00:42:47,120 Speaker 1: I'm going to tell you is you don't need to 675 00:42:47,200 --> 00:42:51,600 Speaker 1: hit rock bottom. So, folks, I love you. I'm on 676 00:42:51,719 --> 00:42:57,480 Speaker 1: your team. I know I'm a hard ass. Sometimes I'm honest, 677 00:42:57,600 --> 00:43:00,680 Speaker 1: and I'm you know, by the way, off and wrong, 678 00:43:00,920 --> 00:43:03,400 Speaker 1: I'm off and wrong. Could I be wrong about this 679 00:43:03,520 --> 00:43:07,440 Speaker 1: or some of this? Maybe, probably, But what I do 680 00:43:07,560 --> 00:43:12,000 Speaker 1: know is that I've been in this space helping people change, 681 00:43:12,040 --> 00:43:23,640 Speaker 1: working with bodies, bums, legs, mines, carbs, fat, protein, micros, macros, thinking, beliefs, values, attitudes, emotions, psychology. 682 00:43:23,719 --> 00:43:25,799 Speaker 1: I've been working in this space for a very long 683 00:43:25,840 --> 00:43:30,560 Speaker 1: time with thousands of people, and a common observation and 684 00:43:30,600 --> 00:43:33,879 Speaker 1: a common experience of mine, is people who don't think 685 00:43:34,040 --> 00:43:36,719 Speaker 1: enough of themselves, who don't believe in themselves, who are 686 00:43:36,719 --> 00:43:43,160 Speaker 1: always looking for some external antidote. And it's just sometimes 687 00:43:43,160 --> 00:43:46,640 Speaker 1: it's just our willingness to say, you know what, I've 688 00:43:46,719 --> 00:43:51,400 Speaker 1: never really really consistently done the work, and I'm going 689 00:43:51,480 --> 00:43:53,719 Speaker 1: to do it and i know it won't be fun, 690 00:43:53,719 --> 00:43:56,240 Speaker 1: and I'm okay with that, and I'm sick and tired 691 00:43:56,320 --> 00:44:00,319 Speaker 1: of being that person who's I'm just done want to 692 00:44:00,360 --> 00:44:03,160 Speaker 1: be that. And it's not about having some big cathartic 693 00:44:03,239 --> 00:44:08,160 Speaker 1: breakthrough or moments or revelation from on Hey, brothers, sisters, 694 00:44:08,600 --> 00:44:10,840 Speaker 1: But it's just about you know, going, yeah, I'm I 695 00:44:11,640 --> 00:44:14,920 Speaker 1: hear your harps, I know what you're saying, you know, 696 00:44:16,360 --> 00:44:18,719 Speaker 1: and the and if your next question is yeah, but 697 00:44:18,800 --> 00:44:22,120 Speaker 1: how do I Well, my question to you is why 698 00:44:22,200 --> 00:44:27,600 Speaker 1: won't you? Because you know how, how how how you 699 00:44:27,680 --> 00:44:29,880 Speaker 1: change your life is you get up tomorrow and you 700 00:44:29,920 --> 00:44:32,120 Speaker 1: don't do the same thing that you did today. That's 701 00:44:32,239 --> 00:44:35,160 Speaker 1: how you don't eat the way that you ate today. 702 00:44:35,160 --> 00:44:37,040 Speaker 1: You don't move the way that you ate today. You 703 00:44:37,080 --> 00:44:39,719 Speaker 1: don't you don't talk, you don't choose the way that 704 00:44:39,800 --> 00:44:42,239 Speaker 1: you did today. If those things are relevant for you, 705 00:44:43,360 --> 00:44:47,480 Speaker 1: we literally just start doing what is uncomfortable. That is 706 00:44:47,640 --> 00:44:53,680 Speaker 1: generally step one. What's uncomfortable, Well, what's uncomfortable is stopping 707 00:44:53,719 --> 00:44:56,240 Speaker 1: these ten things that I need to stop. Okay, stop 708 00:44:56,840 --> 00:44:59,080 Speaker 1: or stop one and build on it, stop two, build 709 00:44:59,080 --> 00:45:01,600 Speaker 1: on it, and build up to the ten over time. 710 00:45:01,760 --> 00:45:04,440 Speaker 1: Be honest, be brave, Be brutal with yourself, not brutal 711 00:45:04,480 --> 00:45:07,799 Speaker 1: in a destructive brutal in a healthy way. There, I 712 00:45:07,840 --> 00:45:10,040 Speaker 1: am doing this. I am fucking up. It is me. 713 00:45:10,760 --> 00:45:12,480 Speaker 1: Sure I want to blame people, and sure I want 714 00:45:12,520 --> 00:45:14,640 Speaker 1: to go oh, but you don't understand my situation. I've 715 00:45:14,640 --> 00:45:16,759 Speaker 1: got you know, I've got this work and this many 716 00:45:16,800 --> 00:45:18,759 Speaker 1: kids and this back issue and all those things. And 717 00:45:18,800 --> 00:45:20,960 Speaker 1: I get it, and I understand, and you have my sympathy. 718 00:45:21,280 --> 00:45:23,479 Speaker 1: But guess what there are lots of people with kids, 719 00:45:23,480 --> 00:45:25,279 Speaker 1: there are lots of people with jobs, There are lots 720 00:45:25,280 --> 00:45:27,759 Speaker 1: of people with shit genetics, there are lots of people 721 00:45:27,840 --> 00:45:31,839 Speaker 1: in less than ideal situations. And while you have my compassion, 722 00:45:32,200 --> 00:45:34,520 Speaker 1: that's probably not going to change in the next week 723 00:45:34,640 --> 00:45:38,760 Speaker 1: or two. So what about wherever you are, however, Well, 724 00:45:38,800 --> 00:45:44,680 Speaker 1: you can do it with whatever you've got available to you, time, energy, resources, knowledge, anything. 725 00:45:45,400 --> 00:45:49,040 Speaker 1: Just start, Just start and put that get out a 726 00:45:49,120 --> 00:45:51,880 Speaker 1: jail card. That's safety net out of the picture.