WEBVTT - Bonus: Urzila Carlson Devastates Lauren

0:00:00.240 --> 0:00:03.279
<v Speaker 1>Our next guest is someone we're often nervous about putting

0:00:03.279 --> 0:00:07.480
<v Speaker 1>on air because well, she could really say anything. For

0:00:07.560 --> 0:00:11.560
<v Speaker 1>the first time, Netflix has been overtaken in subscriber numbers

0:00:11.560 --> 0:00:13.840
<v Speaker 1>by specialize.

0:00:13.280 --> 0:00:15.920
<v Speaker 2>My Only Fans.

0:00:16.560 --> 0:00:19.200
<v Speaker 3>She's a South African New Zealander and one of.

0:00:19.160 --> 0:00:22.319
<v Speaker 1>The funniest things of the comedy saying please welcome to

0:00:22.320 --> 0:00:23.080
<v Speaker 1>the shop.

0:00:22.880 --> 0:00:26.040
<v Speaker 3>As a low cows morning.

0:00:27.200 --> 0:00:27.760
<v Speaker 4>I love that.

0:00:28.240 --> 0:00:31.120
<v Speaker 2>That and I've forgotten about the only fans And I'm

0:00:31.120 --> 0:00:32.680
<v Speaker 2>glad to go plug that today.

0:00:32.760 --> 0:00:36.160
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, no password, you need to log in? Yeah no, no, And.

0:00:36.120 --> 0:00:40.360
<v Speaker 2>I'll give out ten free passwords today if anyone.

0:00:40.600 --> 0:00:45.000
<v Speaker 3>I can't wait for that abusive stuff. Hey, how are

0:00:45.040 --> 0:00:46.120
<v Speaker 3>you going? Like you're in here?

0:00:46.120 --> 0:00:48.120
<v Speaker 5>It's early morning. You're in the middle of comedy festival,

0:00:48.159 --> 0:00:49.600
<v Speaker 5>so you're doing late nights early morning?

0:00:49.720 --> 0:00:52.120
<v Speaker 3>Yes, how schedule going all right?

0:00:52.159 --> 0:00:54.560
<v Speaker 2>Because I've got kids. You know, when you have kids

0:00:54.560 --> 0:00:57.800
<v Speaker 2>and people go, how do you cope? I'm like, I've

0:00:57.960 --> 0:01:02.440
<v Speaker 2>just allocated eighteen years of no sleep, bad skin, and

0:01:02.480 --> 0:01:05.120
<v Speaker 2>a bad attitude, you know, So I'm ready to go.

0:01:05.800 --> 0:01:06.039
<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

0:01:06.280 --> 0:01:08.319
<v Speaker 6>She's also she's also a movie star.

0:01:08.440 --> 0:01:10.680
<v Speaker 3>Now, since we call it out last time, you're a

0:01:10.720 --> 0:01:11.479
<v Speaker 3>Netflix star.

0:01:12.880 --> 0:01:13.280
<v Speaker 4>Thank you.

0:01:13.440 --> 0:01:15.320
<v Speaker 2>I mean to be fair for the Netflix stuff a bit,

0:01:15.400 --> 0:01:19.560
<v Speaker 2>but I prefer if you just stick with the movie start.

0:01:20.400 --> 0:01:22.319
<v Speaker 5>Okay, So if you put your ticket prices up, now

0:01:22.360 --> 0:01:23.000
<v Speaker 5>you're a movie star.

0:01:23.240 --> 0:01:25.880
<v Speaker 2>I don't even know we were talking before if people

0:01:26.040 --> 0:01:28.720
<v Speaker 2>ask me, because I never buy tickets to anything like.

0:01:28.800 --> 0:01:31.320
<v Speaker 2>I just get invited to go like because usually other

0:01:31.440 --> 0:01:33.399
<v Speaker 2>mates having shows, and.

0:01:33.319 --> 0:01:35.479
<v Speaker 4>So when people go, where do I get tickets? Honestly,

0:01:35.520 --> 0:01:36.080
<v Speaker 4>I don't know.

0:01:36.520 --> 0:01:38.959
<v Speaker 2>Okay, I wouldn't be able to buy tickets to my

0:01:39.000 --> 0:01:39.720
<v Speaker 2>own show.

0:01:39.640 --> 0:01:44.160
<v Speaker 5>Live nations, livenation, dot com dot are you?

0:01:44.160 --> 0:01:45.080
<v Speaker 3>You don't say to her?

0:01:45.200 --> 0:01:47.200
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I always say, all go to my website.

0:01:48.280 --> 0:01:49.880
<v Speaker 3>You're not your only fans website.

0:01:50.040 --> 0:01:54.320
<v Speaker 2>No, no, no, I mean that pushes a lot of

0:01:54.360 --> 0:01:55.400
<v Speaker 2>the sales.

0:01:56.600 --> 0:01:57.000
<v Speaker 4>Stuff.

0:01:57.200 --> 0:01:59.400
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, that's just describers.

0:02:00.120 --> 0:02:02.520
<v Speaker 1>We were also talking about before you step through this

0:02:02.560 --> 0:02:06.400
<v Speaker 1>beautiful studio, about all things woo woo and a bit

0:02:06.600 --> 0:02:13.200
<v Speaker 1>crystals beach. No, but Vivian reception got h to do

0:02:13.280 --> 0:02:14.360
<v Speaker 1>some angel.

0:02:14.040 --> 0:02:16.320
<v Speaker 3>Car I love this stuff.

0:02:16.760 --> 0:02:20.680
<v Speaker 2>Didn't reveal now My card that I pulled said builder,

0:02:21.200 --> 0:02:22.360
<v Speaker 2>because I'm a builder.

0:02:22.400 --> 0:02:24.680
<v Speaker 4>I create stuff. I mean, I'm a lesbian with a

0:02:24.720 --> 0:02:25.160
<v Speaker 4>tool belt.

0:02:25.200 --> 0:02:27.600
<v Speaker 2>Mate, I was telling my audience last night because I

0:02:27.639 --> 0:02:30.680
<v Speaker 2>grew up so poor. I don't like it hurts my

0:02:30.840 --> 0:02:32.960
<v Speaker 2>soul to get someone to do anything for me.

0:02:33.440 --> 0:02:36.040
<v Speaker 4>Like before I my arms are all bruised up. I

0:02:36.040 --> 0:02:36.959
<v Speaker 4>don't know if you can see that.

0:02:37.360 --> 0:02:40.160
<v Speaker 2>That's from my log splitter with six time capacity because

0:02:40.160 --> 0:02:42.760
<v Speaker 2>I had to do eight cubes of wood before I

0:02:42.840 --> 0:02:45.520
<v Speaker 2>go home because by the time we get home it'll

0:02:45.560 --> 0:02:46.720
<v Speaker 2>be cold, and I want to.

0:02:46.639 --> 0:02:50.280
<v Speaker 5>Make sure you're a real di wire.

0:02:50.440 --> 0:02:52.880
<v Speaker 4>Oh yeah. So when I called that car, I was

0:02:52.919 --> 0:02:53.280
<v Speaker 4>like yeah.

0:02:53.320 --> 0:02:56.080
<v Speaker 2>And then Tom the tour manager, pulled music and it

0:02:56.400 --> 0:03:00.480
<v Speaker 2>was with music, musicians.

0:02:59.600 --> 0:03:01.440
<v Speaker 3>You didn't and anything he didn't know.

0:03:01.480 --> 0:03:01.880
<v Speaker 4>That's right.

0:03:04.240 --> 0:03:06.600
<v Speaker 2>I do want to say that because I dated a

0:03:06.639 --> 0:03:09.959
<v Speaker 2>reiki master and I do want to say that all

0:03:10.000 --> 0:03:11.280
<v Speaker 2>of that stuff is nonsense.

0:03:12.480 --> 0:03:14.680
<v Speaker 4>I just wanted to say all that stuff is not

0:03:15.120 --> 0:03:15.880
<v Speaker 4>and all of them.

0:03:17.600 --> 0:03:21.960
<v Speaker 5>And c all of the don't start on the balls.

0:03:22.040 --> 0:03:24.400
<v Speaker 3>I love the balls.

0:03:24.400 --> 0:03:25.160
<v Speaker 4>All they do.

0:03:26.280 --> 0:03:28.480
<v Speaker 2>Know the hot bowls that they do, the like for

0:03:28.520 --> 0:03:29.639
<v Speaker 2>the suction cups.

0:03:30.120 --> 0:03:32.160
<v Speaker 3>Someone love the bruise your back.

0:03:32.240 --> 0:03:33.680
<v Speaker 4>They do nothing for you.

0:03:33.760 --> 0:03:36.200
<v Speaker 2>And all of her friends who do it, honestly, their

0:03:36.280 --> 0:03:37.360
<v Speaker 2>lives are dumpsterfoys.

0:03:38.960 --> 0:03:39.480
<v Speaker 4>That's shay.

0:03:39.520 --> 0:03:40.960
<v Speaker 3>We do it because we're looking for.

0:03:41.920 --> 0:03:43.840
<v Speaker 4>You want someone who's worse than you.

0:03:43.840 --> 0:03:46.160
<v Speaker 2>You know what I'm saying, stop sharing energy with these

0:03:46.200 --> 0:03:47.320
<v Speaker 2>people who are vulnerable.

0:03:47.360 --> 0:03:53.560
<v Speaker 5>Already Clint to my guru and now he looks and

0:03:53.600 --> 0:03:56.680
<v Speaker 5>she's been rubbing his shins, second stomach.

0:03:56.880 --> 0:03:58.120
<v Speaker 4>Yes, you know you've got to.

0:03:59.600 --> 0:04:01.560
<v Speaker 2>You know, I've got one hanging.

0:04:06.360 --> 0:04:07.600
<v Speaker 6>Was it a shot in the yesterday?

0:04:07.600 --> 0:04:08.400
<v Speaker 4>What did you get?

0:04:08.680 --> 0:04:14.280
<v Speaker 5>It's just some wellness activity in the listen. I feel amazing.

0:04:14.520 --> 0:04:16.680
<v Speaker 4>I bet was. It wasn't one of those coffee in the.

0:04:16.680 --> 0:04:18.600
<v Speaker 3>Mos No, no, no, I didn't do a coffee animal I had.

0:04:18.680 --> 0:04:21.440
<v Speaker 4>I just I bet you've considered one, haven't you.

0:04:21.440 --> 0:04:21.880
<v Speaker 3>No?

0:04:21.880 --> 0:04:25.839
<v Speaker 5>No, I'm not really big up the but it was

0:04:26.000 --> 0:04:29.360
<v Speaker 5>in the cheek, like the butteck. But Jas is having

0:04:29.400 --> 0:04:31.560
<v Speaker 5>a wow of a time telling everyone, do.

0:04:31.560 --> 0:04:34.520
<v Speaker 4>You know what? I just get those chewable vitamin ceas

0:04:34.600 --> 0:04:35.960
<v Speaker 4>that dynamic.

0:04:35.520 --> 0:04:36.720
<v Speaker 3>It tastes like oranges.

0:04:36.960 --> 0:04:37.359
<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

0:04:37.400 --> 0:04:40.719
<v Speaker 2>But rather than flash of cheek to a doctor, yeah yeah,

0:04:41.279 --> 0:04:43.760
<v Speaker 2>I saved my you know, I saved my cheeks on

0:04:43.800 --> 0:04:44.239
<v Speaker 2>the tram.

0:04:45.360 --> 0:04:46.920
<v Speaker 4>A you going to say and kill that. You got

0:04:46.920 --> 0:04:47.880
<v Speaker 4>to drop trou at.

0:04:47.839 --> 0:04:53.120
<v Speaker 2>Some point, A your only we need to touch on advertising,

0:04:53.200 --> 0:04:53.800
<v Speaker 2>look into it.

0:04:54.720 --> 0:04:56.679
<v Speaker 6>We we do need to touch on the movie quickly

0:04:56.720 --> 0:04:58.080
<v Speaker 6>because it's going great guns.

0:04:58.120 --> 0:04:59.360
<v Speaker 4>My wife loved it.

0:05:00.680 --> 0:05:01.719
<v Speaker 6>How did this come about?

0:05:01.760 --> 0:05:02.000
<v Speaker 4>Did she?

0:05:02.200 --> 0:05:04.360
<v Speaker 6>Is it true that Amy shul was really just slid

0:05:04.440 --> 0:05:05.000
<v Speaker 6>into your DM.

0:05:05.920 --> 0:05:07.560
<v Speaker 2>I literally got up in the middle of the night

0:05:07.600 --> 0:05:09.400
<v Speaker 2>to go to the loo and then I never checked

0:05:09.400 --> 0:05:11.400
<v Speaker 2>my phone, but something check your fine.

0:05:11.440 --> 0:05:13.600
<v Speaker 4>I checked and it's her saying can you act?

0:05:14.160 --> 0:05:18.480
<v Speaker 2>Give me a call? And I phoned her immediately. Well,

0:05:18.560 --> 0:05:20.280
<v Speaker 2>she's in New York, so it was was in the

0:05:20.279 --> 0:05:20.920
<v Speaker 2>middle of the Nor.

0:05:21.160 --> 0:05:24.200
<v Speaker 3>Did she m your Instagram or in Instagram?

0:05:24.440 --> 0:05:29.160
<v Speaker 2>Yeah? Yeah, no, no, she usually replies with videos and

0:05:29.200 --> 0:05:31.560
<v Speaker 2>then yeah, I found her and the next side that

0:05:31.720 --> 0:05:33.560
<v Speaker 2>audition I got the part.

0:05:34.920 --> 0:05:38.600
<v Speaker 3>Yeah it was Did you spend time with Adam Sandler?

0:05:39.520 --> 0:05:39.680
<v Speaker 4>No?

0:05:39.720 --> 0:05:42.200
<v Speaker 2>But I met him and he kept calling me buddy,

0:05:42.400 --> 0:05:45.839
<v Speaker 2>which apparently is a very good sign. Yeah, and he goes, buddy,

0:05:45.839 --> 0:05:47.760
<v Speaker 2>you're very good, You're very funny.

0:05:47.960 --> 0:05:49.920
<v Speaker 3>So you are very funny, buddy.

0:05:49.680 --> 0:05:50.320
<v Speaker 4>That's what he said.

0:05:50.360 --> 0:05:54.600
<v Speaker 6>Okay, buddy, last time, she's going to go to l A.

0:05:54.839 --> 0:05:56.320
<v Speaker 6>You're going to You're going to turn No.

0:05:56.360 --> 0:05:59.360
<v Speaker 2>Why it seems the same when I started working in Australia,

0:05:59.400 --> 0:06:01.480
<v Speaker 2>everyone's like, she's going to move to Australia. Bro, I'm

0:06:01.480 --> 0:06:04.040
<v Speaker 2>still in the same house in West Auckland, top of mine.

0:06:04.080 --> 0:06:09.160
<v Speaker 3>Would she all right?

0:06:09.200 --> 0:06:12.160
<v Speaker 6>Now, look, you can get tickets for you don't say.

0:06:12.600 --> 0:06:15.080
<v Speaker 6>The tour is on Live Nation, dot com, dot a

0:06:15.160 --> 0:06:16.920
<v Speaker 6>you there are still tickets available.

0:06:16.600 --> 0:06:17.600
<v Speaker 4>Next week in Melbourne.

0:06:17.680 --> 0:06:20.680
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, you are killing it selling out the palais night

0:06:20.720 --> 0:06:22.160
<v Speaker 6>after ten shows in Melbourne.

0:06:22.200 --> 0:06:25.360
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, because I'm only doing a shorter run.

0:06:25.560 --> 0:06:25.800
<v Speaker 3>I know.

0:06:25.839 --> 0:06:28.359
<v Speaker 5>It's like you do write a stand up show and

0:06:28.360 --> 0:06:30.600
<v Speaker 5>then you do it night after night. But does it evolve?

0:06:31.000 --> 0:06:31.120
<v Speaker 1>Oh?

0:06:31.200 --> 0:06:33.120
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, is it different or is it exact?

0:06:33.720 --> 0:06:35.960
<v Speaker 2>No, it's I always say to the people who cover

0:06:36.000 --> 0:06:37.440
<v Speaker 2>in the first week, I want you to come back

0:06:37.480 --> 0:06:40.760
<v Speaker 2>the last week because it's so different. And even when

0:06:40.800 --> 0:06:44.880
<v Speaker 2>I start touring and then at the end, it's like

0:06:45.120 --> 0:06:47.359
<v Speaker 2>the stories are the same, but it just gets bigger

0:06:47.560 --> 0:06:50.440
<v Speaker 2>and ye like and it's more because I relax more

0:06:50.480 --> 0:06:51.279
<v Speaker 2>into the show too.

0:06:51.440 --> 0:06:52.440
<v Speaker 4>But no, I never do.

0:06:52.800 --> 0:06:56.520
<v Speaker 2>I know, there's like, especially American comics can work for word, Yes,

0:06:56.720 --> 0:06:57.799
<v Speaker 2>you were the same show.

0:06:57.960 --> 0:06:59.279
<v Speaker 4>I would lose my mind.

0:06:59.320 --> 0:07:01.240
<v Speaker 2>And also I try and think about put to a

0:07:01.360 --> 0:07:04.520
<v Speaker 2>manager who's with me for sixteen seventy shows over the year.

0:07:04.960 --> 0:07:08.119
<v Speaker 4>He's the side of stage eating Nils going. I can't

0:07:08.120 --> 0:07:08.440
<v Speaker 4>take it.

0:07:08.480 --> 0:07:09.440
<v Speaker 3>He ain't watching the show.

0:07:10.680 --> 0:07:10.840
<v Speaker 4>Watch.

0:07:10.880 --> 0:07:13.920
<v Speaker 6>I'll give you the hot tear. He ain't watching every show.

0:07:14.120 --> 0:07:16.040
<v Speaker 6>He's got a little ear pody listening to a podcast.

0:07:17.720 --> 0:07:18.600
<v Speaker 4>I'm my own fan.

0:07:20.440 --> 0:07:21.680
<v Speaker 3>Well, look at live.

0:07:21.520 --> 0:07:23.760
<v Speaker 6>Nation dot com. Dot a is a place to go

0:07:23.800 --> 0:07:26.200
<v Speaker 6>and grab tickets. Ursula Carlson join us on the air.

0:07:26.200 --> 0:07:29.440
<v Speaker 6>It's always good to see you mate. Thanks for coming in.

0:07:32.000 --> 0:07:36.960
<v Speaker 5>Ja Lauren Lauren Wake Up Feeling Good on Nomber one hundred.

0:07:38.200 --> 0:07:41.360
<v Speaker 3>Lauren on Socials