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Speaker 1: Appo Shape Production.

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Speaker 2: Welcome back to another episode of Am I A Bad Mum?

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Speaker 1: Podcast?

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Speaker 2: The question we ask three times a week.

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Speaker 1: We're in term four now, yes we are.

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Speaker 2: Christmas is coming.

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Speaker 1: Elsie made that comment to me the other day of going, oh,

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Speaker 1: there is no need to say that Christmas is only

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Speaker 1: eleven weeks away or ten weeks away or whatever it is.

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Speaker 1: She's like, that's just far too far away.

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Speaker 2: It's not far enough, my friend.

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Speaker 1: From a parenting perspective, You're going, Actually, it's so close

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Speaker 1: that people are sending like text messages about like, what's

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Speaker 1: plans for Christmas? I haven't even worked out what next

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Speaker 1: week is.

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Speaker 2: No, I don't know what's planned for this afternoon.

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Speaker 1: I don't.

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Speaker 2: We're on Instagram as well at am I A Bad mom?

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Speaker 2: Speaking of Elsie because this is perfect for her. And

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Speaker 2: actually Amelia sent me this. And Amelia is the oldest

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Speaker 2: twin by by one minute, one very important minute, but

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Speaker 2: she sent this through and it's a meme and it

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Speaker 2: says new study shows that the youngest sibling is fifty

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Speaker 2: percent more likely to end up in jail than the

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Speaker 2: oldest sibling.

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Speaker 1: Am I a bad mom? For missing them? Just a

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Speaker 1: little bit too? Much.

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Speaker 2: I was having a conversation about you to somebody the

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Speaker 2: other day and I don't know what you're about to

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Speaker 2: talk about. The conversation was around Rachel was finding it

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Speaker 2: a lot more difficult with her kids growing up.

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Speaker 1: And not needing her as much. I think I am.

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Speaker 2: I think I'm quite embracing the let's move on to

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Speaker 2: the next bit. When are you moving out?

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Speaker 1: I think this comes off the back of coming out

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Speaker 1: of holidays. So we just had the last lot of

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Speaker 1: school holidays, right, and I randomly had majority of the

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Speaker 1: school holidays without kids because my mom took them away,

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Speaker 1: which we spoke about. That's on Nanadee. You talk them

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Speaker 1: to the middle of Queensland. They went out, they had

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Speaker 1: the best holidays, right. But you know when you get

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Speaker 1: to the back of holidays and then you're talking with

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Speaker 1: other mums and they go, oh, how did you go

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Speaker 1: for school holidays? And I had this. I didn't have

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Speaker 1: my kids for school holidays, but they had the best

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Speaker 1: time they went away. I just worked and did life.

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Speaker 1: And I've said it to a few mums and they

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Speaker 1: sort of looked at me with this foul disgust on

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Speaker 1: their way. So I like, how fucking dare you have

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Speaker 1: no kids? I genuinely missed them so much. You know,

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Speaker 1: we talk about this podcast so many things with reflection

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Speaker 1: like that self reflection. This was like a real soppy

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Speaker 1: self reflection of I actually am not sure what I'm

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Speaker 1: going to do without them, kind of like reflection. It's

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Speaker 1: real weird and you and like we've been talking about

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Speaker 1: this on the podcast for a couple of weeks where

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Speaker 1: you're like, power on, pony, let's go. I'm ready, are

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Speaker 1: you moving out? Oh? You're getting your driver's license? Oh?

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Speaker 1: This is one do you know what I mean? And

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Speaker 1: here I am just like holding on tightly, just going like,

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Speaker 1: don't grow up, please take me with you vibe.

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Speaker 2: And I'm looking at you with a very confused look

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Speaker 2: right now because I know it's very puzzling to me,

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Speaker 2: I think because I've always been the other one. I'm like,

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Speaker 2: who even are you?

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Speaker 1: I've been the other way? Well, just simply means that

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Speaker 1: I'm going through something, not them, just me, like me

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Speaker 1: internally and personally, it's obviously going through something.

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Speaker 2: Maybe there's to be like a little bit easier at

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Speaker 2: the moment too, because I don't feel like this will

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Speaker 2: be the same conversation off the back of the morning

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Speaker 2: of them fighting, putting their shoes on, not getting out

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Speaker 2: of the house, and all the.

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Speaker 1: Rest, all of the other jars that comes with it.

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Speaker 1: And I think it's probably from having nearly two weeks

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Speaker 1: away from each other and I it's two weeks. It

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Speaker 1: was nearly two weeks by the time I got back

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Speaker 1: from Remember we had the dance concert and then dance

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Speaker 1: and then more dance, and I drove home late on

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Speaker 1: the Tuesday afternoon with both the girls. They literally got

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Speaker 1: in the car and started the journey on the same

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Speaker 1: day that we got home from NUSA, and then I

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Speaker 1: didn't see them till the following Friday night, where they

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Speaker 1: were back to school on the Monday.

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Speaker 2: So I reckon it's going to be a really weird

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Speaker 2: feeling when I know, we joke about the fact that

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Speaker 2: I don't think my kids are going to move out

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Speaker 2: for a very long time, at least thirty ire and

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Speaker 2: I'm not even joking at.

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Speaker 1: Of what it costs. Yeah, that's exactly right. Life's so

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Speaker 1: good at home. That's the thing.

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Speaker 2: They've got school camp coming up. They don't want to go.

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Speaker 2: They're absolutely hating the thought of going to school cap.

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Speaker 2: We got to do this an I'm like, school camp

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Speaker 2: will be fun. No, it won't, your alliance mate.

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Speaker 1: It's only countdowns on how many days until like because

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Speaker 1: it always falls around their birthday, doesn't it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's not on their birthday this year, but yeah,

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Speaker 2: it's close. We talk about the fact that they are

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Speaker 2: never going to move out, but what are we gonna

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Speaker 2: do when they actually do move out. I know that

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Speaker 2: over those two weeks that your girls were away, you

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Speaker 2: were struggling with what do I do with myself? Because

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Speaker 2: every single day is about what your kids need. You

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Speaker 2: wake up in the morning and it's about what they need.

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Speaker 2: They need breakfast, what do they need for school today?

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Speaker 2: Do they have to pack a pee kit? Where are

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Speaker 2: they going after school? Then it's dinner time, homework, bedtime.

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Speaker 2: Every part of your day is thinking about your kids.

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Speaker 2: So then we're not around.

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Speaker 1: Well that's what I was like. And you know when

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Speaker 1: it was for me, like the time of day sort

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Speaker 1: of that three pm drough to almost like seven pm

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Speaker 1: because they from little right, we've always had a routine.

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Speaker 1: I always had a routine, and the back end of

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Speaker 1: the day was always like really quite a strong routine.

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Speaker 1: It was you know, play, have fun, get dirty, all

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Speaker 1: the rest, and then it would come in. It would

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Speaker 1: be like bath, dinner, wine down, you know, maybe a

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Speaker 1: bit of TV or whatever, and then reading and then bedtime.

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Speaker 1: It was always just so like it's always been that

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Speaker 1: back end of the day routine, Katie. There was a

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Speaker 1: day I was sitting there at my laptop just trying

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Speaker 1: to constructively do some work. I'm just sitting there like

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Speaker 1: this or what do I do now? I didn't even

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Speaker 1: have to cook dinner, but I still chose to cook dinner,

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Speaker 1: but I could cook stuff that actually adults wanted.

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Speaker 2: Would have helped you in anyway if I had to

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Speaker 2: come over to your house during that time, just messed

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Speaker 2: shit up, just kick my shoes off, made it a

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Speaker 2: bit messy, so you had to, you know, tidy up

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Speaker 2: behind me, complained about whatever you cook for dinner, and

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Speaker 2: then just argued.

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Speaker 1: With you feel right. The funniest part was, though, there

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Speaker 1: was like an option or a time where someone said

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Speaker 1: something about like catching up with kids, and I was like, oh, yeah, no,

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Speaker 1: I'm not. No, you've got all your kids. Oh no,

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Speaker 1: oh no, you don't do that. I don't need to

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Speaker 1: catch up because I don't have any kids, and you've

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Speaker 1: got lots of kids, so I don't really need to

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Speaker 1: catch up. Yeah, no, it's so bad.

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Speaker 2: I've had that recently too, where someone was like, de

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Speaker 2: fancy doing this, and I was like, not really, because

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Speaker 2: my kids are away on the weekend, and yes, I

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Speaker 2: would love to catch up with you. I don't want

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Speaker 2: to catch up with you if there's other kids.

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Speaker 1: Yea.

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Speaker 2: There Like not that I don't like your kids. Your

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Speaker 2: kids are beautiful, love your kids, but I just don't

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Speaker 2: want to be around kids. If I don't have my kids,

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Speaker 2: I don't be around anyone else.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, this is exactly right. And I sort of looked

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Speaker 1: at them. I was like, you know, I love you guys,

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Speaker 1: but I'm probably good actually sit on my own, sit

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Speaker 1: on the couch by myself and wonder what my children

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Speaker 1: are doing. I love that they had the best time

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Speaker 1: aback to wrap this up. When they did get home,

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Speaker 1: I got like a really warm reception and like it

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Speaker 1: was big hugs and all the rest, And then I

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Speaker 1: found myself hugging them a little bit too much, to

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Speaker 1: the point that my second born by Sunday, so he

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Speaker 1: had only been home Friday night, so Saturday Sunday, she

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Speaker 1: was like, Ah, can you actually stop hugging me? What's

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Speaker 1: wrong with you? What's wrong with me? I just I've

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Speaker 1: missed you and you've been away for two weeks. Oh

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Speaker 1: can you stop hugging me a little bit too much? Sake?

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Speaker 1: I'm like this, I'm like, I can't win here. I

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Speaker 1: can't win. One minute I don't hug you enough, next minute,

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Speaker 1: I'm hugging you too much. What do you want from me? Kid? Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Well I had that recently too. Don't hug me? Yeah,

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Speaker 2: an episode of the podcast, and I was like, don't

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Speaker 2: hug me.

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Speaker 1: I was like, okay, just go be here.

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Speaker 2: Okay, this is what we're going to do next school

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Speaker 2: holidays and your kids go away. I'm going to come over.

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Speaker 1: I'm going to mess it.

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Speaker 2: I'm going to make you. I'm going to make you

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Speaker 2: feel right at home. I'm going to complain about dinner

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Speaker 2: and probably argue with you. I'm going to probably tell

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Speaker 2: you that I hate you a few time and time,

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Speaker 2: and then I will hug you. I'll give you a hug.

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Speaker 1: Because wrap it up with a big hug. I love you,

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Speaker 1: but I hate you, but here's a hug. Anyway I'll

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Speaker 1: feel right at home