WEBVTT - You had ONE JOB!!!

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<v Speaker 1>Apodiape Production.

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<v Speaker 2>Welcome back to another episode of Am I A Bad Mom? Podcast?

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<v Speaker 2>That's the question we continuously asked you in school holidays.

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<v Speaker 1>School holiday fun, the fun zone of trying to entertain

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<v Speaker 1>your child every single day for two weeks straight. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>and then the complaints that come out of so bored.

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<v Speaker 1>Why you like the worst mum out of everyone. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>their mom's changing them to like the Australia Zoo.

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<v Speaker 2>You're like, why aren't we going on holidays? We can

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<v Speaker 2>go on holidays every time there's a school holiday. Just

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<v Speaker 2>before the school holidays, we celebrated your forty eight. I

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<v Speaker 2>was going to post something on the AMI Bad Mum

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<v Speaker 2>Instagram and then I thought I better just check with

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<v Speaker 2>rach that she's okay with this because it was a

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<v Speaker 2>big night. I mean, who starts a party at three pm?

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<v Speaker 1>I actually think it was a vibe. I think the

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<v Speaker 1>three pm start was a killer because like killer is

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<v Speaker 1>in positive because everyone was like obviously ramped up. But

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<v Speaker 1>then it was kind of like a day at the

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<v Speaker 1>races because you're home a bit earlier, so you feel.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, not that much earlier that this is the thing.

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<v Speaker 2>I think everybody thought, Oh if a party starts at three.

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<v Speaker 2>You know we're going to be home by nine. No, No,

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<v Speaker 2>didn't end up like that. We stayed there, We continued on.

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<v Speaker 2>We then went to another venue where I did put

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<v Speaker 2>something on my Instagram. Actually I filmed a little video

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<v Speaker 2>of we all ordered like cocktails and stuff, and then

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<v Speaker 2>very soon after that there were people falling off of chairs,

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<v Speaker 2>and then there was people like being really loud. Was

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<v Speaker 2>this one old couple who were trying to have dinner

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<v Speaker 2>in this particular place and we were like a bloody

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<v Speaker 2>cyclone came through the venue and very quickly the manager

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<v Speaker 2>came over to me and said, just let you know

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<v Speaker 2>responsible service of alcohol. We're not serving anyone cocktails apart

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<v Speaker 2>from me. Rage they gave me mine, stopped everybody else

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<v Speaker 2>from having them.

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<v Speaker 1>The look of utter disregard from I think everyone else

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<v Speaker 1>that had ordered one, and they just all stared at

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<v Speaker 1>you as you trying.

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<v Speaker 2>And I also really enjoyed it because I remember at

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<v Speaker 2>one point Laura was looking at me and she was like,

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<v Speaker 2>but where's my cocktail? I was like, you're not allowed one,

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<v Speaker 2>as I was sipping my O I am my tea.

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<v Speaker 2>But you did do a lovely speech. Oh no, let

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<v Speaker 2>me just set the scene, Kate. So we're in Lefties

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<v Speaker 2>in Brisbane and you've got the whole of the downstairs

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<v Speaker 2>area for your party, and then upstairs on the balcony

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<v Speaker 2>there's another function that's happened with families with small kids.

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<v Speaker 1>That was meant to be inside the front bar. So

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<v Speaker 1>like that whole upstairs area that was not for families

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<v Speaker 1>to be watching the onslaught of our party.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it was like you were stood on stage giving

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<v Speaker 2>your speech and you had an audience of your friends

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<v Speaker 2>and family and then a bunch of kids upstairs. And

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<v Speaker 2>this is just a little part of the speech.

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<v Speaker 1>I love you guys, I loves Sorry about the trauma

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<v Speaker 1>up there, but I'm sorry. Also this comes off the

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<v Speaker 1>back of me saying no, I don't want any speeches.

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<v Speaker 1>And then I look and then there's my brother who

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<v Speaker 1>doesn't drink, and he starts making a speech and I

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<v Speaker 1>was like, please stop. You know when you're look and

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<v Speaker 1>you go please stop. This kind of one fold and

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<v Speaker 1>then it went from one to two to three to four,

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<v Speaker 1>id well, youse, make it stop anyway. And I was just.

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<v Speaker 2>Watching you because you'd started doing your speech and you're

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<v Speaker 2>talking about you know, everybody coming and all the rest

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<v Speaker 2>of it. And then you started swearing a lot, and

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<v Speaker 2>then you looked up at the children, because I was

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<v Speaker 2>just like, sorry, number.

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<v Speaker 1>One, where have you come from? Number two? Why are

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<v Speaker 1>you watching? This is not a stage show for children?

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<v Speaker 1>And number three? And then I got to a point

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<v Speaker 1>where I was like, Oh, I don't care, They're not

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<v Speaker 1>my kids.

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<v Speaker 2>Probably worth mentioning at this point as well as not

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<v Speaker 2>only did you have a potty mouth in front of

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<v Speaker 2>all those young, innocent children, but you were also dressed

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<v Speaker 2>as Christina Aguilera in the dirty video with your ass out.

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<v Speaker 1>Am I a bad mum for sending my husband on

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<v Speaker 1>the birthday?

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<v Speaker 2>Errand oh, never do that? Never do that without like

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<v Speaker 2>real clear instruction, Katie.

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<v Speaker 1>This didn't need clear instruction. I had organized everything down

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<v Speaker 1>to the finest tea. And just for the record, the

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<v Speaker 1>same lady made three cakes and the other two cakes

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<v Speaker 1>didn't have this mishap. So all that one got told

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<v Speaker 1>was here's the address, be here at this time, drop

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<v Speaker 1>off this cash, pick up the cake, come home.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, pay for the cake. Yeah, bring the cake home.

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<v Speaker 2>That was all there was to it.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, so he's got given the cake. The cake now

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<v Speaker 1>is in a cake box which we all know is white,

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<v Speaker 1>and some of them have clear tops, so you can

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<v Speaker 1>see straight through to the cake that you've just purchased

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<v Speaker 1>that is now in both hands as you walk back

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<v Speaker 1>to the cake back to the car and then put

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<v Speaker 1>the cake with your two hands onto the seat, probably

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<v Speaker 1>still watching the cake with its.

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<v Speaker 2>Clear with its clear lid, which is a great idea

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<v Speaker 2>to make sure that the cake's looking alright as you

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<v Speaker 2>ordered it.

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<v Speaker 1>So though, like when you're handing over a cake, like

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<v Speaker 1>you know, taking myself back into the cheesecake shop days

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<v Speaker 1>in my teenage years, we had to open the box

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<v Speaker 1>to be this is the right one? Are you happy

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<v Speaker 1>with this? And they go, yeah, why didn't the cake

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<v Speaker 1>lady do that?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, because I have bought many a cake from the

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<v Speaker 2>cheesecake and they always do that.

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<v Speaker 1>So then oh, mate, it comes home. He's so happy,

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<v Speaker 1>he's so happy. Look at me I did the birthday

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<v Speaker 1>errand cool mate, thank you for doing that one job.

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<v Speaker 1>I appreciate it. Just pop it in the fridge. Pops

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<v Speaker 1>in the fridge and then gets to a certain point

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<v Speaker 1>where one thinks to pull out cake from fridge so

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<v Speaker 1>that it's like of room temperature ready to eat. When

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<v Speaker 1>we've finished dinner. I look at the cake. It fucking

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<v Speaker 1>says happy birthday, Layla and Abby. I looked because I went,

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<v Speaker 1>what of that? Because it wasn't the colors that I

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<v Speaker 1>had ordered, nor did I have the little cowgirl hat

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<v Speaker 1>on it that i'd ordered. It also says two names

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<v Speaker 1>and not your daughter's name, you fucking imbecile.

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<v Speaker 2>I was like, hap birthday, Laila Abby.

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<v Speaker 1>Luckily I've got breathe at the house with me and

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<v Speaker 1>we were just literally having a quiet side Luckily she

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<v Speaker 1>was in the proximity of this cake and myself and him,

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<v Speaker 1>because I was ready to literally launch this cake at

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<v Speaker 1>him and go, you idiot, Not one moment in that

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<v Speaker 1>whole duration of that hour and a half drive to

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<v Speaker 1>and from getting the cake, did you damn at it? Okay?

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<v Speaker 2>I can understand how this would happen if the lid

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<v Speaker 2>wasn't clear, did he not? I don't see he said

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<v Speaker 2>happy birthday Layla and Abby.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, to top this off, Katie, He turns to

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<v Speaker 1>me and goes, how do I know what color it was?

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<v Speaker 1>Because you ordered it?

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<v Speaker 2>But what about your daughter's name being Gracie?

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<v Speaker 1>Sorry, I can't remember the last time your daughter's name

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<v Speaker 1>changed to Layla and Abby instead of Gracie turns twelve?

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<v Speaker 1>What is wrong? How could this be my fault? Anyway?

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<v Speaker 1>Bree was losing her shit, laughing, but at the same

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<v Speaker 1>time she goes, oh my gosh, and she starts to

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<v Speaker 1>then prime problem solved. Don't worry, Rach like we can easily,

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<v Speaker 1>Like we can rub out the names and get another thing,

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<v Speaker 1>all right, Gracie, I said, I don't want to. I

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<v Speaker 1>didn't ask for a cake with bows. I paid for

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<v Speaker 1>extra disco bulls and cowgirl hat and twelve to be

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<v Speaker 1>on it. I didn't ask for these colors. I don't

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<v Speaker 1>even like this cake.

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<v Speaker 2>And the thing is is that you don't know what

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<v Speaker 2>cake is inside either, Like you could have tried to

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<v Speaker 2>make do removing Leyla and Abby's names, putting Gracieton's twelve

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<v Speaker 2>on there, putting up with the colors. Imagine if you

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<v Speaker 2>cut into it and it was carrot cake, and.

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<v Speaker 1>He goes, that's fine, they'll eat it. It's cake. No,

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<v Speaker 1>I don't want carrot cake, I said. I let her

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<v Speaker 1>choose what flavor cake she wanted. And then are we

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<v Speaker 1>cut open and it's carrot cake? I said you fuck

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<v Speaker 1>with I said, get in the car and drive. And

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<v Speaker 1>so then I'm trying to wring the cake lady who

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<v Speaker 1>doesn't have a phone number on the thing because it's

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<v Speaker 1>through Instagram. And I'm like, I did say it look

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<v Speaker 1>like a mad stalker now because it's just like audio

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<v Speaker 1>coal audio coal, audio, like probably about twelve times. And

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<v Speaker 1>I said, you're going back. I don't care, and he's

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<v Speaker 1>looking at me, going, well, if you can't get onto it,

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<v Speaker 1>I can't swap the cake.

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<v Speaker 2>How far away was the cake as well?

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<v Speaker 1>And Paddington, So thirty five minute dry there and then

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<v Speaker 1>thirty five minutes back and then she's like, I'm so sorry.

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<v Speaker 1>Could you return it? Yeah, of course you'd want me

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<v Speaker 1>to return it, because I've got somebody else's cake that

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<v Speaker 1>you need to pass on to somebody else. And she goes,

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<v Speaker 1>can I please like make it up to you. I

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<v Speaker 1>don't want any more cake after this. We've had three birthdays.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't want any more cake for the next three months.

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, but you can keep my husband, keep hand,

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<v Speaker 1>send me home the cake, and don't send home the husband.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, this is awsome. It was clear.

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<v Speaker 2>I was like, clear, lid could you imagine though you

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<v Speaker 2>hadn't have looked at the cake first and realized, and

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<v Speaker 2>you'd finished dinner, and you'd gone to light the cans,

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<v Speaker 2>and you take it over. Happy birthday, Layla and Abby.

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<v Speaker 1>I would have probably got his head and ruined his

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<v Speaker 1>daughter's birthday because I would have smacked just head into

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<v Speaker 1>the kate, you know, end of birthday week, Katie. I'm done.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm so done. I have done everything. I have done

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<v Speaker 1>this rigmarole now twice this weeking one job