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Speaker 1: I'll get our team hope you bloody terrific. This is

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Speaker 1: part two of the conversation between Josh Pittman and Bianca

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Speaker 1: Chatfield and myself from behind the mask Josh's show. We're

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Speaker 1: doing a bit of a co share here on the

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Speaker 1: You Project. This is part two. If you haven't enjoyed,

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Speaker 1: if you haven't enjoyed, if you haven't listened apart one,

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Speaker 1: you might want to backtrack, but it probably doesn't matter

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Speaker 1: because they're different topics and different conversations. But anyway, here's

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Speaker 1: the second bit. Enjoy You know what's interesting about what

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Speaker 1: the anchor was talking about, which was that kind of

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Speaker 1: three sixty feedback that you were talking about, which is

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Speaker 1: where they sit in front of a group that's really

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Speaker 1: rooted in so when we think about how we think

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Speaker 1: and why we think the way that we do. You

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Speaker 1: and I have spoken about this hanging out. It's called

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Speaker 1: metacognition is thinking about thinking and then So that's a

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Speaker 1: real area of psychology's thinking about how you think and

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Speaker 1: why you think the way that you do. This is

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Speaker 1: a real self awareness door opening where you're like, oh,

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Speaker 1: this is what I'm thinking and feeling. Now why where

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Speaker 1: does this thought come from. Where does this story come from?

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Speaker 1: Does it serve me or sabotage me? Is it based

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Speaker 1: in fear? Does it make sense?

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Speaker 2: Right?

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Speaker 1: And then the next layer up in the self awareness

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Speaker 1: kind of pyramid from there is called theory of mind,

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Speaker 1: which is you understanding how other people think. So that's

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Speaker 1: the you understanding your teammates. And it's not about agreeing

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Speaker 1: or align aligning or condoning. It's just understanding. Like when

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Speaker 1: I work without X and alcoholics, which I do, I

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Speaker 1: understand them well now because I've done it a lot,

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Speaker 1: but I've never had drugs and I've never had booze.

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Speaker 1: So for me, it was a matter of trying to

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Speaker 1: understand their version of life and their version of reality

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Speaker 1: and so addicted.

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Speaker 2: To not having it. Yeah, so you understand that from

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Speaker 2: the sure.

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Speaker 1: But when you understand, like how someone else thinks, it's

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Speaker 1: almost like you learn their language. It's like I know

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Speaker 1: how to speak which is my dad, and I know

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Speaker 1: how to speak Mary, which is my mum. But if

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Speaker 1: I speak Ron to Mary, it doesn't work, and vice versa,

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Speaker 1: because I know how Dad thinks, I know how mum thinks.

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Speaker 1: I know how athletes think. But also I know even

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Speaker 1: when I was working with you know, Melbourne Phoenix and Vixen's.

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Speaker 1: For a minute, Bianca was different to other athletes, and

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Speaker 1: so what I could say to her I couldn't say

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Speaker 1: to someone else. So if I wanted the same outcome,

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Speaker 1: I might need two strategies. And I think one of

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Speaker 1: the mistakes that we make in high performance broadly and

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Speaker 1: the pursuit of success, is that we think there's a

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Speaker 1: three step plan. So when people go to me, what's

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Speaker 1: the best way to X y Z, I go for who, though,

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Speaker 1: because the best way because my best career path would

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Speaker 1: be your worst. My best diet, you know, I ate

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Speaker 1: two meals a day, breakfast and dinner. But would I

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Speaker 1: recommend that for you, I would not, because you're not me.

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Speaker 1: You don't have my body sixty, you don't have my physiology,

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Speaker 1: you know. And so it's trying to figure out because

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Speaker 1: you think about the fact that one, our body is

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Speaker 1: always telling us something, it's a biofeedback system. And two,

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Speaker 1: if we go think of our life as an ongoing

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Speaker 1: experiment and equals one and you're the experimenter and you're

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Speaker 1: the experiment you well, we're always producing data. And if

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Speaker 1: we turn down the emotion. I know I sound like

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Speaker 1: a PhD student. But if you turn down the emotion

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Speaker 1: and try and figure out what is my life telling me,

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Speaker 1: what are my results telling me, what is my body

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Speaker 1: telling me, what's my career telling me, what's my bank

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Speaker 1: balance telling me? And trying to do that with real

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Speaker 1: awareness and humility and real curiosity, like, actually, what is that?

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Speaker 2: You know?

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Speaker 1: Like when people go what's her problem, they don't really

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Speaker 1: want an answer. They're not really saying, what is her problem?

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Speaker 1: What is her story? What's happened? How can I help?

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Speaker 1: Really that's an insult. What's her problem? It's like she's

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Speaker 1: an idiot. You must all say the same thing. And

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Speaker 1: so that opening that door on trying to understand yourself.

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Speaker 1: And the tricky thing with self analysis is that you're

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Speaker 1: trying to analyze the contents of your mind with your mind.

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Speaker 1: You know, you're thinking about your own thinking with your

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Speaker 1: own thinking.

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Speaker 2: And so.

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Speaker 1: Going through life, I think realizing that we're looking at

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Speaker 1: whatever it is situation, conversation, challenge, sporting career, singing career,

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Speaker 1: we're looking at everything through the Josh lens or the

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Speaker 1: Craig lens or the Bianca lens. And having that awareness,

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Speaker 1: Like realizing that you lack awareness is like the beginning

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Speaker 1: of awareness. Absolutely, It's like recognizing your unconsciousness is the

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Speaker 1: beginning of consciousness, you know. And it's I think, and

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Speaker 1: this is deep, but I think it's that intersection of

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Speaker 1: sociology and psychology and spirituality where the stuff happens, not

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Speaker 1: one or the other, all of it, and philosophy, philosophy

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Speaker 1: and even physiology, because there's there's a physiological consequence to

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Speaker 1: a thought. If you think you're in danger but you're

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Speaker 1: not well, stuff happens in your body, you know.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, we talk a lot about this expansion awareness on

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Speaker 2: the show, and really I think we talk about it

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Speaker 2: because that is what is behind the mask, you know,

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Speaker 2: and at a spiritual level, behind you know, the mask

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Speaker 2: is the roles we play, the thoughts we have and

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Speaker 2: all these sort of things. There is a space beyond that,

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Speaker 2: and that space is awareness. But once we have that awareness,

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Speaker 2: it's not about going I've got to ditch the mask.

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Speaker 2: In fact, to pull on the thread of what you

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Speaker 2: were talking about with Mary and Ryan and Bianca, it's

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Speaker 2: about going, Ah, I can put on a little thin

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Speaker 2: mask here that serves this conversation, and so we know

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Speaker 2: how to be a chameleon in certain ways or wear

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Speaker 2: these different masks for different engagements that we have because

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Speaker 2: it serves it. But we're doing it through awareness, not

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Speaker 2: through I'm just going to people. Please, I'm just gonna

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna do this for this person, this person, and

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Speaker 2: you're just sort of it's it's unconscious master, and there's

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Speaker 2: this this different thing. Guys. I want to shoot back

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Speaker 2: to a topic that has been plowing through my head, which.

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Speaker 3: Is another p.

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Speaker 2: Which is that you talked about growing up and this

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Speaker 2: thing about being you know, six foot two and what

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Speaker 2: that that was like for you and Craig. You talked

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Speaker 2: about growing up and being a beast kid.

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Speaker 4: You what are you laughing at? You're literally laughing. I've

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Speaker 4: heard that therapy.

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Speaker 5: I've heard the story so many times. It just makes

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Speaker 5: me laugh because I love how he tells.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, well I want to. I want to. I want

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Speaker 2: to hear this because our listeners, you know, might might

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Speaker 2: not know your stories and and how these sort.

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Speaker 3: Of should I leave in this moment?

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Speaker 2: No, no, you here, you know your need for this? Sure? Yeah?

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Speaker 2: How these you know, because I've had physical stuff too.

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Speaker 2: That's really yeah, really, it really affected me as well,

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Speaker 2: you know, speak about it in last week's episode. So yeah,

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Speaker 2: how do these physical attributes play into your feeling of

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Speaker 2: not enoughness? And how that not not enoughness is, which

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Speaker 2: is really an epidemic at the moment, plays into abya

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Speaker 2: that the idea that I can't be successful because I'm

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Speaker 2: inherently not enough because of the way I am. Did

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Speaker 2: you guys have these sort of shame stories around your

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Speaker 2: your physical appearance?

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Speaker 4: Jumpo.

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Speaker 1: I will say, though, I wasn't really bullied, and that

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Speaker 1: sounds really no.

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Speaker 2: So where does jumbo come from that?

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Speaker 1: I know that sounds like bullying, but like my mates

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Speaker 1: called me jumbo. Really some of the teachers call me jumbo,

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Speaker 1: My coaches call me jumbo.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, Like for me, it wasn't it.

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Speaker 1: There's more other stuff, like within the context of my

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Speaker 1: friends and family, there was no obviously no bullying, but

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Speaker 1: you know, there was obviously like I was a big kid,

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Speaker 1: like I was probably thirty thirty five kilos overweight, so

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Speaker 1: I wasn't a little bit chubby like I was.

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Speaker 4: I was obese, and so there were consequences of that.

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Speaker 1: But it was more that I just hated how I

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Speaker 1: looked and felt and I knew that, And I mean,

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Speaker 1: like when you're fourteen, it the biggest thing in your

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Speaker 1: life is the biggest thing in your life, Like you

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Speaker 1: know what I mean. It's like you don't like looking

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Speaker 1: back now at what I understand to be real problems,

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Speaker 1: you know, and what is going on in the world.

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Speaker 1: I look back at, you know, fat little me, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, well, really in the overall scheme, but things

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Speaker 1: that was nothing, but.

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Speaker 4: You don't know that, you know. So for me, there

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Speaker 4: was just.

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Speaker 1: Psychological, sociological, emotional, and you know, physiological kind of crap

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Speaker 1: that intersected. And I hate to bankle with this, but

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Speaker 1: for me, it came to a head at the year

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Speaker 1: eight swimming sports, which was where I really every time

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Speaker 1: the swimming sports happened. I went to a private boys school.

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Speaker 1: We had to swim, we had participate, didn't matter if

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Speaker 1: you're the best or the worst. Everyone swims, everyone runs

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Speaker 1: on sports day. And so every time it was my

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Speaker 1: turn to swim, like my event would come because you know,

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Speaker 1: they had group A through to group whatever, H me

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Speaker 1: and I would go and I would hide, so I

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Speaker 1: would literally go somewhere so I couldn't be found and

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Speaker 1: just make up some crap like I wasn't feeling well

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Speaker 1: or whatever. So the event would come and go and

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Speaker 1: I would miss it. And this particular year, my sports

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Speaker 1: teacher was kind of onto it and he grabbed me

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Speaker 1: before I headed off. I headed off, he grabbed me

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Speaker 1: and said, you got to swim. And so I remember

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Speaker 1: standing up there. I was fourteen, it was year eight,

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Speaker 1: Saint Paul's Catholic College. It's algan and no one did

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Speaker 1: anything wrong, like nobody was but I remember having to

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Speaker 1: stand up there on the swimming block and there was

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Speaker 1: I don't know, all the school. So what's that six

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Speaker 1: seven hundred kids and a bunch of parents and a

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Speaker 1: bunch of teachers, maybe a thousand people, And this sounds ridiculous,

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Speaker 1: but I just remember being absolutely beyond my imagination humiliated

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Speaker 1: and embarrassed and shamed, and so that that was horrible,

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Speaker 1: but it was also the catalyst. It's like I came

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Speaker 1: home and I went for a run. I've never been.

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Speaker 1: I'd never been for a run. And when I say run,

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Speaker 1: I covered five k's and four of it was walking,

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Speaker 1: but I walked, jog walked, jogged, and literally from that day,

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Speaker 1: within four months, I lost thirty kilos from that day. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: because I offer I think that sometimes that real psychological, emotional, behavioral,

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Speaker 1: and practical shift happens off the back of an event

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Speaker 1: like something, Yeah, there's an inner switch that turns on

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Speaker 1: or flecks or a light bulbile, whatever metaphor we want

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Speaker 1: to use. But yeah, I just went, not, that's I'm

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Speaker 1: never doing that again. That's never happening again. I'm never

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Speaker 1: nuh And I just went it didn't matter. So I

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Speaker 1: literally halved my food and I just ran every day.

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Speaker 1: I didn't I had no idea what I was doing.

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Speaker 1: I didn't know how to train. I did push up

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Speaker 1: sit ups and ran. That's what I did. And then

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Speaker 1: when I could, then I was light enough and strong

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Speaker 1: enough to do chins. I incorporated chins and that I

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Speaker 1: did push up sit ups chins run on repeat three

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Speaker 1: hundred and sixty five days of the year. I became

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Speaker 1: an absolute maniac.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, so went total.

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Speaker 1: I went from yeah, like completely unhealthy and unfit to obsessed.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, I did the same the same thing, and

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Speaker 2: it had to you know, work through that relationship. But

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Speaker 2: it also sparked, like how interesting that that that sparked

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Speaker 2: a whole career around yeah, fitness and health and bodybuilding

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Speaker 2: and all sorts of stuff, but it also in helping yourself.

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Speaker 2: Even though extreme, it led you to a path of helping.

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Speaker 2: And that's a beautiful sort of synergy and story in

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Speaker 2: it or the book end of it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, something really good came out of it. And

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Speaker 1: it was good because I mean, I was obsessive, and

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Speaker 1: I was insecure, and I had low self esteem and

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Speaker 1: big ego and all of those things. And I got

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Speaker 1: the like the burger with the emotional burger with a lot,

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Speaker 1: and I got my sense of self and from what

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Speaker 1: I looked like. And then by the time I was

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Speaker 1: fifteen sixteen, I looked relatively good compared to the previous version.

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Speaker 1: And then all of a sudden, you're not socially invisible.

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Speaker 1: Then you get a girlfriend, then you can actually run,

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Speaker 1: and you get picked for sporting teams.

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Speaker 4: And so that's the good.

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Speaker 1: But the bad is you then correlate this, Oh well,

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Speaker 1: if I look like this, I get these outcomes. If

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Speaker 1: I look a bit better and run a bit better,

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Speaker 1: and I get the there's like this, you know, linear correlation.

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Speaker 1: When this goes better, that goes better. And then you think, well,

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Speaker 1: imagine if I was an absolute freak, you know, and

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Speaker 1: so you start to look for everything I did anyway

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Speaker 1: through my body. So I created this real unhealthy relationship

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Speaker 1: with my body where I didn't know where it finished

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Speaker 1: and I started.

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Speaker 2: And this is where the yeah, going back to the

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Speaker 2: mask and the ego, really, it's where when we when

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Speaker 2: we when we feed it, that that stuff, it takes

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Speaker 2: on a life of its own, and it's very becomes very,

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Speaker 2: very thick, and it's very hard to have that self

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Speaker 2: awareness or to crack into that space of a selfness

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Speaker 2: to see that within yourself, because you know this, this

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Speaker 2: is just what happens to start when we get When

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Speaker 2: we do that, the thing that you're doing is getting

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Speaker 2: getting hotter, getting more money, getting the bigger house, and

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Speaker 2: we get fed the compliment or we get another pay rise,

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Speaker 2: and it just keeps feeding, it feeds that. Yeah, the

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Speaker 2: addiction feeds are not enoughness epidemic.

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Speaker 3: I honestly think it's a thing for everyone.

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Speaker 5: I reckon if everyone dug deep on what controls them

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Speaker 5: or what motivates them or what you know, feels like

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Speaker 5: it has to be an obsession for them to just

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Speaker 5: kind of navigate through life. I reckon when I look

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Speaker 5: back at my career, the worst thing that I did,

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Speaker 5: in the worst trait that I had was comparing myself

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Speaker 5: to other people because not really, yes, I understood my

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Speaker 5: body to a certain degree, but you're constantly getting that feedback.

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Speaker 5: And we spoke how that feedback can be really good,

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Speaker 5: but you're constantly getting that feedback about you need to

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Speaker 5: be fitter, you need to be stronger, you need to

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Speaker 5: be leaner, and you're hearing that all the time because

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Speaker 5: people are wanting you to be the best high performance

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Speaker 5: athlete you can be, and you know, play the best

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Speaker 5: you can possibly be when you're out there. And I

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Speaker 5: think I got really caught in that negative spiral of

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Speaker 5: looking to the person next to me who had a

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Speaker 5: totally different body but might have, you know, played a

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Speaker 5: great game, and I'd be like, oh, she's leaner, faster, stronger, How.

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Speaker 3: Am I going to do that?

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Speaker 5: And rather than it took me a lot long time

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Speaker 5: to really be narrowed down for me what I needed

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Speaker 5: and what my body needed and how I could look

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Speaker 5: after my body and train my body rather than trying

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Speaker 5: to be like somebody else. And you know, I was

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Speaker 5: in the Aussie team and I was still comparing myself

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Speaker 5: to everybody else because you have this pressure on you

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Speaker 5: and you're at selections to make the team. And I

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Speaker 5: was a defender, and so you'd look at all the

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Speaker 5: other defenders who might have been playing better or getting

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Speaker 5: a start over you, and you were just analyzing them

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Speaker 5: about what it was that they had over you. And

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Speaker 5: once I think I could strip all that back, and

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Speaker 5: you surrounded yourself with good people like Craigo, with someone

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Speaker 5: for me who i'd always go to and be like, oh,

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Speaker 5: I just download everything and say this is what it's

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Speaker 5: like and how am I going to get like this?

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Speaker 5: And you know, he would know what my body needed

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Speaker 5: and help me with my body and not compare myself

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Speaker 5: to everybody else. But that's what I really struggled with.

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Speaker 5: I'm not a naturally gifted, freakish athlete. I had to

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Speaker 5: train my ass off to be fit enough to play

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Speaker 5: at that level. But where it got scary for me,

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Speaker 5: I think was I would overtrain and I ended up

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Speaker 5: with things like my injuries ended up being things like

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Speaker 5: having glandular fever. And because my body and my health

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Speaker 5: I could, I couldn't cope with how much pressure I

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Speaker 5: was trying.

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Speaker 2: To put on it. Yeah, that's the body telling you to.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, stop, like just calm down.

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Speaker 5: And so over the years, and I had seventeen years

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Speaker 5: in athlete life, and my last probably four or five

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Speaker 5: is probably when I felt like I was in such

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Speaker 5: a calmer place where I knew that I was in

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Speaker 5: this team because of what I brought to the table,

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Speaker 5: not because of you know, how I needed to change

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Speaker 5: or who else I needed to be like or look

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Speaker 5: like that I could still get the job done with

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Speaker 5: my body.

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Speaker 2: So comparison, which is the thief, so eavil thief of joy, Yeah,

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Speaker 2: it was. Yeah, that's like diminished, that dissolved, And that's

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Speaker 2: part of the reason why those last half decade.

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Speaker 5: Was Yes, yeah, definitely, and I think it's still always there,

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Speaker 5: but I'm now far more aware. When we go back

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Speaker 5: to that whole self awareness piece, I'm far more aware

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Speaker 5: when I'm doing it. And if I I generally like

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Speaker 5: to be a positive person, I'm generally a positive person

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Speaker 5: and quite optimistic. But I can really tell when I

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Speaker 5: start to start thinking negatively and start even if I'm

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Speaker 5: speaking negatively, I'm like, what am I doing right now

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Speaker 5: that's making me like this? And I always know it's

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Speaker 5: because I have been thinking about something that I've been

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Speaker 5: comparing myself to or yeah, in some way I've been

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Speaker 5: caught in that track and then I spiral into this

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Speaker 5: negative space and I just know, you can never have

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Speaker 5: a positive life with a negative mind, right. It's really

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Speaker 5: the more positive you can be, or the more you

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Speaker 5: know optimistic you are, the easier it is.

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Speaker 3: To find the answer and find a solution.

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Speaker 5: And so I, yeah, it's a big cue for me

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Speaker 5: when I get into that negative spra and you know,

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Speaker 5: especially when I'm around other negative people that like to

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Speaker 5: throw out their negatives first before the positives.

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Speaker 3: I'm like, well, get me out of here.

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Speaker 5: And I've become a lot strong with my boundaries around

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Speaker 5: who you around that, you know, take that away from you.

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Speaker 2: Comparison is a space of negativity, you know, because it's

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Speaker 2: it's a negative self talk, really, and I think we

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Speaker 2: can and I've been in times early on in my

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Speaker 2: career where comparison did help me to succeed. It helped

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Speaker 2: be the driver to go I'm not good enough on it.

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Speaker 2: But it's never lasting.

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Speaker 3: It fuels that competitiveness to a point, doesn't it.

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Speaker 2: But you can always play the game of this someone

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Speaker 2: who is better than me and you're and so it

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Speaker 2: feeds the not enoughness thing. It feeds a self loathing,

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Speaker 2: you know, and a negative and negative spiral.

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Speaker 5: And then you never actually acknowledging or you know, congratulating

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Speaker 5: yourself on the little milestones that you make or the

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Speaker 5: little things that you do, because it's never like what

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Speaker 5: the other person did.

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Speaker 2: Or you're never enough with comparison. I think it's them.

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Speaker 2: It's a shocker.

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Speaker 1: I want to know for both you, the idea of success,

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Speaker 1: like when you were heading towards like I want to be,

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Speaker 1: you know, want to be on the stage on a

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Speaker 1: global level, and you were on the journey, but you

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Speaker 1: weren't there and you were aspiring to get there. Then

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Speaker 1: you got there and you were a sixteen year old

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Speaker 1: netballer who maybe wanted to play for Australia who ended

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Speaker 1: up being all of.

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Speaker 4: The things you were.

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Speaker 1: What's the gap between what you thought it would be

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Speaker 1: and what it was like when you got there?

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Speaker 4: Did it feel like you thought it would feel?

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Speaker 2: Yes and no is the answer. What I didn't realize

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Speaker 2: growing up. I had big dreams and I always dream big.

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Speaker 2: It costs the same amount of energy to have the

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Speaker 2: thought of or have the dream of the stars and

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Speaker 2: the moon as it does to you know, the top

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Speaker 2: of the tin shed, So dream big, but also between

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Speaker 2: where you are in that dream, as we talked about earlier,

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Speaker 2: is a hell of a lot of hard work and

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Speaker 2: a hell of a lot of sacrifice and so and

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Speaker 2: that's that's been the word really for me. It's you

387
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Speaker 2: can have what you can potentially have in a first

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Speaker 2: world privilege, you know whatever, You can potentially have everything

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Speaker 2: you want, but you cannot have everything you want at

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Speaker 2: the same time. And so getting to the top of

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Speaker 2: the mountains for me, which were playing Phantom and Fanta

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Speaker 2: the opera, playing Jean Valjean and Lami Is in London,

393
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Speaker 2: they were the dreams of sixteen seventeen year old for me,

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Speaker 2: and to realize them twenty years later, Yes, I sit

395
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Speaker 2: with that pride of congratulations and for myself and not

396
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Speaker 2: not just a pat on the back, but a really

397
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Speaker 2: really long hug and a few tears. Yeah to that

398
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Speaker 2: sixteen year old self who've put those dreams out there.

399
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Speaker 2: I knew it was going to take a lot of

400
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Speaker 2: hard work, and I was prepared for the hard work.

401
00:20:52,400 --> 00:20:55,920
Speaker 2: I've never been afraid of discipline and hard work. I've

402
00:20:55,960 --> 00:20:58,800
Speaker 2: grew up really sporty person. I know what that's like

403
00:20:58,920 --> 00:21:03,960
Speaker 2: to have that athlete mentality. I wasn't aware of how

404
00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:09,960
Speaker 2: fucking taxing it would be on me, how exhausting. I

405
00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:14,160
Speaker 2: wasn't aware of how much I would appease and plicate

406
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Speaker 2: and try and make other people happy, to try and

407
00:21:17,480 --> 00:21:20,439
Speaker 2: you know, make things happen for myself, say no to

408
00:21:20,560 --> 00:21:23,879
Speaker 2: things like you know, between doing Phantom and lame Is,

409
00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:26,720
Speaker 2: I had a week off. I needed three months off.

410
00:21:26,840 --> 00:21:30,240
Speaker 2: I was that exhausted. But I didn't want to not

411
00:21:30,359 --> 00:21:33,719
Speaker 2: have the opportunity. I didn't want those in positions of

412
00:21:33,800 --> 00:21:36,399
Speaker 2: power to say, Honor, we'll get someone else. He's not

413
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Speaker 2: going to get to do it. I didn't want to

414
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Speaker 2: lose the dream. So I sacrificed my own self and

415
00:21:41,680 --> 00:21:46,560
Speaker 2: what I needed, Yeah, what I really needed to appease others.

416
00:21:47,280 --> 00:21:49,920
Speaker 2: I didn't realize I do that. But then I've sacrificed

417
00:21:50,400 --> 00:21:55,480
Speaker 2: relationships and the quality of relationships because I've been really

418
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Speaker 2: selfish and really self motivate and self centered in my career.

419
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Speaker 2: It's had to be about me, or I've felt like

420
00:22:02,119 --> 00:22:04,920
Speaker 2: it's had to be about me. To be able to

421
00:22:04,960 --> 00:22:06,919
Speaker 2: achieve things in the way I want to achieve, so

422
00:22:07,200 --> 00:22:11,359
Speaker 2: really sacrifice them. I've sacrificed time with family that I

423
00:22:11,400 --> 00:22:16,560
Speaker 2: really really value now, I've sacrificed really important things with friends, milestones,

424
00:22:16,640 --> 00:22:22,040
Speaker 2: births of babies, you know, bucks, weekends and just memories

425
00:22:22,080 --> 00:22:24,719
Speaker 2: that are created. And so ultimately, when you look at

426
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Speaker 2: the view from the top, there's a part of it

427
00:22:28,200 --> 00:22:32,560
Speaker 2: that is magical because I'm feeling the feelings of playing

428
00:22:32,600 --> 00:22:35,359
Speaker 2: those roles and there's nothing like that. But I'm also

429
00:22:35,880 --> 00:22:39,080
Speaker 2: part of it that is there's a sadness in it too,

430
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Speaker 2: because I've missed out on so many things, and in

431
00:22:42,440 --> 00:22:44,159
Speaker 2: playing those roles, the only way I could do it

432
00:22:44,200 --> 00:22:46,439
Speaker 2: was really to be a monk. So I didn't have

433
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Speaker 2: a social life living in London. I wasn't having a

434
00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:53,520
Speaker 2: social life with my friends back home. So when I

435
00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:56,640
Speaker 2: look at it, it's going, yeah, it's fantastic, and it's

436
00:22:56,680 --> 00:23:00,840
Speaker 2: also cost a lot, and so it's not what I thought.

437
00:23:01,160 --> 00:23:04,400
Speaker 2: I only thought about the positive things, and those positive

438
00:23:04,440 --> 00:23:08,399
Speaker 2: things I felt them and more, you know, ten ten x.

439
00:23:09,119 --> 00:23:11,719
Speaker 2: Nothing is like playing Jean Valjean or the Phantom. That

440
00:23:11,760 --> 00:23:14,200
Speaker 2: feeling of playing those or when you're there is nothing

441
00:23:14,240 --> 00:23:15,840
Speaker 2: to talk about. That feeling of bliss that I was

442
00:23:15,840 --> 00:23:18,760
Speaker 2: talking about that an under it is that on roids,

443
00:23:19,160 --> 00:23:22,000
Speaker 2: but what it costs me for the other twenty one

444
00:23:22,040 --> 00:23:25,160
Speaker 2: hours of the day is a hell of a lot

445
00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:25,800
Speaker 2: of sacrifice.

446
00:23:25,840 --> 00:23:28,560
Speaker 4: What about you, the idea versus the reality?

447
00:23:28,920 --> 00:23:32,199
Speaker 5: Yeah, I think I often hear other athletes say this,

448
00:23:32,760 --> 00:23:35,679
Speaker 5: and especially at the recent Olympics. Most people say this

449
00:23:35,680 --> 00:23:37,520
Speaker 5: when they win their goal betal, and it's exactly what

450
00:23:37,560 --> 00:23:40,000
Speaker 5: I felt was that when you finally do it and

451
00:23:40,040 --> 00:23:42,040
Speaker 5: as a team you achieved that success that you thought

452
00:23:42,080 --> 00:23:44,280
Speaker 5: you wanted so much, it's just a huge amount of

453
00:23:44,320 --> 00:23:46,800
Speaker 5: relief that you actually have done it, that you can

454
00:23:46,800 --> 00:23:49,639
Speaker 5: tick it off, I've done it. That you're exhausted by it,

455
00:23:50,040 --> 00:23:53,680
Speaker 5: and you often have these big come down afterwards because

456
00:23:54,040 --> 00:23:56,320
Speaker 5: you no longer have that same connection with everybody that

457
00:23:56,359 --> 00:23:58,600
Speaker 5: you're doing it together, and you're trying to work through

458
00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:00,359
Speaker 5: what you're going to get to, you know, to that

459
00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:02,959
Speaker 5: final game to win that gold medal or win that premiership,

460
00:24:03,640 --> 00:24:07,280
Speaker 5: and then it becomes quite overwhelming. I think the exhaustion

461
00:24:07,359 --> 00:24:09,199
Speaker 5: of it all exactly what you were talking about, that

462
00:24:09,400 --> 00:24:12,280
Speaker 5: the cost of it all to drive you to that

463
00:24:12,400 --> 00:24:15,840
Speaker 5: success and when I reflect on the moments that I

464
00:24:15,880 --> 00:24:19,320
Speaker 5: remember most from my career, it is never the moments

465
00:24:19,520 --> 00:24:21,840
Speaker 5: of when you actually win it, or the moments of

466
00:24:21,880 --> 00:24:24,919
Speaker 5: getting your medal or you know, the premiership celebrations. You

467
00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:28,400
Speaker 5: remember the dumb moments that happen as a team, when

468
00:24:28,440 --> 00:24:30,480
Speaker 5: you're preparing, when you're in the change rooms, when you're

469
00:24:30,640 --> 00:24:34,040
Speaker 5: being as you know, immature, with everybody mucking around it.

470
00:24:34,080 --> 00:24:37,320
Speaker 5: They're the special moments that you really love. But the

471
00:24:37,800 --> 00:24:40,280
Speaker 5: version of success that when you finally get there, I think, yeah,

472
00:24:40,280 --> 00:24:42,480
Speaker 5: for me, it was always just really oh, I can

473
00:24:42,520 --> 00:24:45,240
Speaker 5: stop banging on about that and you know, wanting to

474
00:24:45,280 --> 00:24:47,560
Speaker 5: get that because I finally got it. And it takes

475
00:24:47,600 --> 00:24:49,639
Speaker 5: your while to then find that next driver that's going

476
00:24:49,720 --> 00:24:52,439
Speaker 5: to take you forward, what's going to actually allow you

477
00:24:52,480 --> 00:24:54,399
Speaker 5: to put all that energy and effort into something. It

478
00:24:54,440 --> 00:24:56,159
Speaker 5: takes a while to kind of sort that out. I

479
00:24:56,160 --> 00:24:58,399
Speaker 5: think within my own body what I want to do

480
00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:02,280
Speaker 5: next and what I'm compared to drive myself forward with.

481
00:25:03,080 --> 00:25:07,679
Speaker 2: Did you ever take moments actually to clock that this

482
00:25:07,800 --> 00:25:12,240
Speaker 2: is I'm in relief and not in celebration and actually

483
00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:13,600
Speaker 2: celebrate it.

484
00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:15,359
Speaker 5: Well, I think when I got to the like my

485
00:25:15,520 --> 00:25:18,800
Speaker 5: last four or five years. That was when I was

486
00:25:18,840 --> 00:25:22,760
Speaker 5: actually so much more aware of everything and aware that, oh,

487
00:25:22,840 --> 00:25:24,800
Speaker 5: I'd really wanted to do this. I haven't been able

488
00:25:24,800 --> 00:25:26,639
Speaker 5: to do this my whole career, and I've finally been

489
00:25:26,680 --> 00:25:28,840
Speaker 5: able to do it and enjoy it with the people

490
00:25:28,840 --> 00:25:29,280
Speaker 5: around me.

491
00:25:30,080 --> 00:25:32,320
Speaker 3: But that did take to the end of my career,

492
00:25:32,320 --> 00:25:32,800
Speaker 3: and I reckon.

493
00:25:32,840 --> 00:25:36,520
Speaker 5: I look back now on my career as an athlete,

494
00:25:36,600 --> 00:25:39,879
Speaker 5: and I'm so much more prouder of myself than what

495
00:25:39,960 --> 00:25:42,160
Speaker 5: I ever was when I was in the moments, And

496
00:25:42,240 --> 00:25:44,520
Speaker 5: even when I finished, it took me a few years

497
00:25:44,520 --> 00:25:45,640
Speaker 5: to be like, oh.

498
00:25:45,560 --> 00:25:46,680
Speaker 3: Bloody hell, I did that.

499
00:25:47,200 --> 00:25:49,080
Speaker 5: And now I love the fact that I've done that

500
00:25:49,119 --> 00:25:51,719
Speaker 5: for myself and that I can acknowledge that because I

501
00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:54,000
Speaker 5: just don't think you ever have. Well, I didn't have

502
00:25:54,040 --> 00:25:55,959
Speaker 5: the space mentally to be able to ever look at

503
00:25:56,000 --> 00:25:58,520
Speaker 5: it like that, because it was always what's next, what's next?

504
00:25:58,720 --> 00:26:01,600
Speaker 2: I have to do next? You regret not celebrating those

505
00:26:01,600 --> 00:26:05,119
Speaker 2: moments more? Would you advise people to actually sit in

506
00:26:05,119 --> 00:26:06,200
Speaker 2: the celebration.

507
00:26:06,320 --> 00:26:11,400
Speaker 3: If you can regreat celebrating I don't know. I don't

508
00:26:11,440 --> 00:26:11,879
Speaker 3: regret it.

509
00:26:11,960 --> 00:26:14,160
Speaker 5: I mean, I feel fortunate that I've got all these

510
00:26:14,200 --> 00:26:17,359
Speaker 5: teammates who are beautiful friends of mine. We're all still

511
00:26:17,400 --> 00:26:19,800
Speaker 5: so close and even now now we've gone through life

512
00:26:19,880 --> 00:26:22,320
Speaker 5: of having babies and going through all and it's always

513
00:26:22,320 --> 00:26:24,760
Speaker 5: your teammates, your old teammates that you go back to

514
00:26:24,840 --> 00:26:26,600
Speaker 5: in those moments because they know what it's like or

515
00:26:26,600 --> 00:26:28,280
Speaker 5: they've been through it before you and they passed down

516
00:26:28,280 --> 00:26:31,040
Speaker 5: all their knowledge to you. And you know that's They're

517
00:26:31,040 --> 00:26:33,040
Speaker 5: the special group of people that we always will talk

518
00:26:33,080 --> 00:26:34,919
Speaker 5: about the good times that have happened and the moments

519
00:26:34,920 --> 00:26:37,200
Speaker 5: that we did stuff together. So that's where I love

520
00:26:37,359 --> 00:26:39,200
Speaker 5: being part of a team sport, and I have all

521
00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:42,160
Speaker 5: these amazing teammates that I can continue to have those

522
00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:43,640
Speaker 5: conversations in connection with.

523
00:26:51,160 --> 00:26:53,280
Speaker 2: Guys, I asked you to bring in a quote. We've

524
00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:55,879
Speaker 2: got a little something that you might have.

525
00:26:56,280 --> 00:26:58,080
Speaker 4: A writer from the early nineteenth century.

526
00:26:58,080 --> 00:27:02,000
Speaker 1: Her name was a nas Nil and she said, and

527
00:27:02,080 --> 00:27:03,879
Speaker 1: she was I think this is in a couple of

528
00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:06,320
Speaker 1: theological texts as well, but she said, we don't see

529
00:27:06,359 --> 00:27:09,040
Speaker 1: things as they are, We see things as we are ye,

530
00:27:09,920 --> 00:27:13,080
Speaker 1: which is really kind of in line with what we're

531
00:27:13,119 --> 00:27:15,439
Speaker 1: talking about today, and especially the mind stuff.

532
00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:17,120
Speaker 4: It's like, yeah, it.

533
00:27:17,119 --> 00:27:19,520
Speaker 2: Speaks to you, know what you're sort of saying about

534
00:27:19,520 --> 00:27:23,840
Speaker 2: there's there's the experience that you experience, there's experienced the

535
00:27:23,880 --> 00:27:27,040
Speaker 2: other personal experience, and then there's the experience itself.

536
00:27:27,080 --> 00:27:29,480
Speaker 1: There's the thing that's going on which doesn't mean anything,

537
00:27:30,119 --> 00:27:33,840
Speaker 1: and then there's your story about Bianca's story and my story,

538
00:27:33,880 --> 00:27:35,880
Speaker 1: and they're probably three different stories.

539
00:27:36,840 --> 00:27:39,600
Speaker 2: Yeah. I like that quote for me.

540
00:27:40,520 --> 00:27:42,479
Speaker 5: It probably takes me back to when I first started

541
00:27:42,480 --> 00:27:44,040
Speaker 5: and I had a coach, Joyce Brown, who was an

542
00:27:44,040 --> 00:27:46,480
Speaker 5: absolute legend of the netble world, and she was someone

543
00:27:46,520 --> 00:27:50,280
Speaker 5: who really took me under her wing and coached me

544
00:27:50,320 --> 00:27:52,679
Speaker 5: as a person and a player. She's so much she

545
00:27:52,760 --> 00:27:55,480
Speaker 5: cares so much about my life away from the court

546
00:27:55,840 --> 00:27:58,520
Speaker 5: as well as a player. But she always used to

547
00:27:58,520 --> 00:28:01,080
Speaker 5: say and put this quote up on it in our

548
00:28:01,119 --> 00:28:02,919
Speaker 5: team room, if it's to be, it's up to me.

549
00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:06,080
Speaker 5: And she wasn't meaning that in a you know, it's

550
00:28:06,160 --> 00:28:07,720
Speaker 5: up to you to win the game or do it.

551
00:28:08,000 --> 00:28:10,240
Speaker 5: Was about it's up to you to control what you

552
00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:14,280
Speaker 5: can to change, to learn to evolve. It's all on

553
00:28:14,320 --> 00:28:16,720
Speaker 5: your shoulders. Don't expect anyone to come in and.

554
00:28:16,600 --> 00:28:17,119
Speaker 2: Just fix it.

555
00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:20,280
Speaker 5: For you to be accountable, Yeah, and just always be

556
00:28:20,359 --> 00:28:24,719
Speaker 5: in that mindset of learning and so yeah, I always

557
00:28:24,720 --> 00:28:26,760
Speaker 5: remind myself of that, you know, when there's something that

558
00:28:26,800 --> 00:28:28,639
Speaker 5: I'm expecting someone else to change for me.

559
00:28:28,680 --> 00:28:30,080
Speaker 3: When I realized that I could.

560
00:28:29,920 --> 00:28:32,600
Speaker 5: Probably look a little bit deeper internally and figure out

561
00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:35,800
Speaker 5: away myself that that's it's always up to me to

562
00:28:35,800 --> 00:28:36,480
Speaker 5: have a think about that.

563
00:28:36,800 --> 00:28:38,479
Speaker 2: Yeah, and just to pull on that thread. I think

564
00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:42,920
Speaker 2: it speaks to the idea of of accountability and blaming

565
00:28:43,120 --> 00:28:46,720
Speaker 2: others for our lack of success or things not going away.

566
00:28:47,080 --> 00:28:51,280
Speaker 2: How quickly we we point the finger. And it's maybe

567
00:28:51,280 --> 00:28:54,240
Speaker 2: that relationship between shame and blame that you're feeling shame

568
00:28:54,280 --> 00:28:56,320
Speaker 2: that it didn't work out and you don't want to

569
00:28:56,360 --> 00:29:01,600
Speaker 2: take accountability that if it's up to it's meant to be,

570
00:29:01,640 --> 00:29:03,720
Speaker 2: it's up to me. It's like what it was meant

571
00:29:03,720 --> 00:29:06,600
Speaker 2: to be? It was turfold or yeah, and they screwed

572
00:29:06,600 --> 00:29:09,400
Speaker 2: it for me, Like how quickly humans love to do that?

573
00:29:09,480 --> 00:29:12,560
Speaker 5: Rightive mindset that comes with that, and I just hate

574
00:29:12,600 --> 00:29:13,480
Speaker 5: sitting in that space.

575
00:29:13,680 --> 00:29:16,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, I've got one. I often use a roomy quote.

576
00:29:16,720 --> 00:29:20,920
Speaker 2: I do love a bit of thirteenth century Sufism. As

577
00:29:20,920 --> 00:29:23,880
Speaker 2: you start to walk on the way the way it appears,

578
00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:27,280
Speaker 2: and I feel like a lot. As you start to

579
00:29:27,320 --> 00:29:30,560
Speaker 2: walk on the way, the way appears, yes, but a

580
00:29:30,560 --> 00:29:33,320
Speaker 2: lot of people don't want to walk because that first

581
00:29:33,400 --> 00:29:38,280
Speaker 2: step is the thing they're most scared of. And when

582
00:29:38,280 --> 00:29:40,560
Speaker 2: you take that first step that leads to step two,

583
00:29:40,600 --> 00:29:42,560
Speaker 2: step three, you may not have it all sorted out,

584
00:29:43,320 --> 00:29:46,240
Speaker 2: you know, But if you've plotted a destination, don't you

585
00:29:46,280 --> 00:29:48,520
Speaker 2: can also ditch the map and go it may I

586
00:29:48,600 --> 00:29:50,959
Speaker 2: may have different paths to get me there. But if

587
00:29:50,960 --> 00:29:54,160
Speaker 2: you don't plot a destination I think, and have a

588
00:29:54,200 --> 00:29:57,120
Speaker 2: goal or have a dream, it's hard, but it's even

589
00:29:57,240 --> 00:29:59,600
Speaker 2: harder if you don't, if you're not willing to just

590
00:29:59,680 --> 00:30:02,520
Speaker 2: take the first step, and there's such a fear barrier

591
00:30:02,560 --> 00:30:05,320
Speaker 2: with that that first step. I want to sort of

592
00:30:05,520 --> 00:30:08,720
Speaker 2: speak to where is fear, you know, gotten in your

593
00:30:08,760 --> 00:30:12,320
Speaker 2: way of not being able to succeed?

594
00:30:12,520 --> 00:30:15,080
Speaker 1: I think to that it's like, for me, it's about

595
00:30:15,760 --> 00:30:18,360
Speaker 1: where am I going? What's the destination? So getting there?

596
00:30:20,320 --> 00:30:23,840
Speaker 1: But really the prize is who we become getting there.

597
00:30:24,440 --> 00:30:26,160
Speaker 1: It's not about the top of the mountain. It's about

598
00:30:26,200 --> 00:30:30,080
Speaker 1: who you become climbing the mountain. Like you know, for me,

599
00:30:30,120 --> 00:30:32,320
Speaker 1: all the stuff that I've done, some good, some bad,

600
00:30:32,480 --> 00:30:37,760
Speaker 1: some success, some failure, you know, fall down, fuck up,

601
00:30:37,840 --> 00:30:40,920
Speaker 1: get up, all that stuff. Like, it's really about the

602
00:30:41,040 --> 00:30:44,080
Speaker 1: knowledge and the insight and the skill and the understanding

603
00:30:44,240 --> 00:30:46,520
Speaker 1: and the experiences that you have in the middle of that.

604
00:30:46,920 --> 00:30:49,360
Speaker 4: That for me, it's like, that's.

605
00:30:49,360 --> 00:30:53,200
Speaker 2: The space between the first step and landing at the

606
00:30:53,200 --> 00:30:56,080
Speaker 2: top of the mountain. That is Yeah, it's really the space,

607
00:30:56,120 --> 00:30:59,760
Speaker 2: you know. When we had Ben Crow on, we also

608
00:30:59,760 --> 00:31:02,880
Speaker 2: had called Asha Pacman on It's a great episode, but

609
00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:06,520
Speaker 2: he would say, I'm sure Asha would say that from

610
00:31:06,520 --> 00:31:10,080
Speaker 2: a soul's perspective, that's the space between birth and death.

611
00:31:10,680 --> 00:31:12,840
Speaker 2: You know, all the stuff that's happening in the middle

612
00:31:13,000 --> 00:31:15,200
Speaker 2: is the life, and that's where the dance is. That's

613
00:31:15,200 --> 00:31:18,320
Speaker 2: where the enjoyment is. That's where the curiosity, the adventure,

614
00:31:18,360 --> 00:31:21,400
Speaker 2: the play of it all is happening on the journey

615
00:31:21,560 --> 00:31:24,320
Speaker 2: to the destination, and we're so caught up in the

616
00:31:24,360 --> 00:31:27,680
Speaker 2: destination we miss the life and being alive in the middle.

617
00:31:27,760 --> 00:31:31,080
Speaker 1: And I think, if you can be curious around your fear, right,

618
00:31:31,560 --> 00:31:33,920
Speaker 1: So the goal is not to be fearless, because like,

619
00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:36,440
Speaker 1: being fearless is stupid, because there are some things we

620
00:31:36,480 --> 00:31:39,400
Speaker 1: should be scared of. But that fear is going to

621
00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:43,080
Speaker 1: keep you alive right at times, but we can be

622
00:31:43,240 --> 00:31:45,640
Speaker 1: In fact, we have to be scared to be courageous.

623
00:31:46,360 --> 00:31:48,880
Speaker 1: If you're not scared, well there's no courage required. And

624
00:31:48,960 --> 00:31:54,720
Speaker 1: so being being not controlled by fear but rather curious

625
00:31:54,720 --> 00:31:59,160
Speaker 1: about fear is maybe the better paradigm to to go, yeah,

626
00:31:59,200 --> 00:32:02,120
Speaker 1: I'm scared. Cool, that's okay, you should be scared. That's

627
00:32:02,160 --> 00:32:05,280
Speaker 1: fucking terrifying. But now what y Yeah?

628
00:32:05,400 --> 00:32:08,800
Speaker 2: I mean a line scared and has that that that

629
00:32:08,920 --> 00:32:11,680
Speaker 2: fear when it goes to kill an antelope, and that's

630
00:32:11,680 --> 00:32:14,200
Speaker 2: what that's what drives. We need that level of it,

631
00:32:14,320 --> 00:32:16,280
Speaker 2: you know. I have that bit of fear every time

632
00:32:16,400 --> 00:32:23,160
Speaker 2: before poor Antelope on stage. I think Pav already said

633
00:32:23,200 --> 00:32:25,280
Speaker 2: something like if you're not if you're not scared, then

634
00:32:25,280 --> 00:32:27,920
Speaker 2: it doesn't matter to you. Then you don't care. You

635
00:32:27,960 --> 00:32:30,160
Speaker 2: actually need a bit of that fear.

636
00:32:30,000 --> 00:32:33,640
Speaker 5: To adrenaline rush, that nervous energy. That's why that's why

637
00:32:33,680 --> 00:32:35,920
Speaker 5: I love working in TV now, especially live TV. It's

638
00:32:35,920 --> 00:32:39,800
Speaker 5: the same adrenaline rush that you get as an athlete

639
00:32:39,960 --> 00:32:41,719
Speaker 5: when you step out there onto the court. It's like

640
00:32:41,840 --> 00:32:44,080
Speaker 5: have you done your prep? You go like it's up

641
00:32:44,120 --> 00:32:45,360
Speaker 5: to you what happens next.

642
00:32:45,520 --> 00:32:48,000
Speaker 2: And you go with your liveness and livelness of it.

643
00:32:48,240 --> 00:32:50,840
Speaker 5: Well, I love it because it is like that if

644
00:32:50,840 --> 00:32:53,600
Speaker 5: you've if you've done your prep, you should be able

645
00:32:53,600 --> 00:32:55,480
Speaker 5: to figure your way out through no matter what happens,

646
00:32:55,520 --> 00:32:57,920
Speaker 5: but also not expecting it to be perfect. It's okay

647
00:32:58,000 --> 00:32:59,680
Speaker 5: if you stuff up or say the wrong thing. You

648
00:32:59,760 --> 00:33:02,880
Speaker 5: just got to find your way back. And I really

649
00:33:02,960 --> 00:33:05,440
Speaker 5: that drives me a lot, and I love the energy

650
00:33:05,480 --> 00:33:10,040
Speaker 5: from that. But I think there's not much that replicates

651
00:33:10,080 --> 00:33:13,440
Speaker 5: athlete life out of outside of being an athlete, whereas

652
00:33:13,680 --> 00:33:17,880
Speaker 5: live TV and that, I guess it's performing like you,

653
00:33:17,880 --> 00:33:21,840
Speaker 5: you really feel that same energy and yeah, sometimes it

654
00:33:21,920 --> 00:33:23,680
Speaker 5: scares the life out of you, but it's bloody fun

655
00:33:23,720 --> 00:33:24,040
Speaker 5: doing it.

656
00:33:24,200 --> 00:33:30,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, greentlemen, Rush, you've done some coaching in your time.

657
00:33:30,440 --> 00:33:33,720
Speaker 2: You were the head coach of the Junior Nepal Academy.

658
00:33:33,800 --> 00:33:36,560
Speaker 5: Yeah, I had in my own academy out with Victoria University.

659
00:33:36,680 --> 00:33:40,280
Speaker 2: Yeah. And do you still work in a mentor and

660
00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:42,200
Speaker 2: coaching space in ways?

661
00:33:42,320 --> 00:33:42,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, so I work.

662
00:33:43,080 --> 00:33:45,200
Speaker 5: I work a lot in the leadership space, so working

663
00:33:45,240 --> 00:33:50,840
Speaker 5: with people within corporates or within teams, and a lot

664
00:33:50,880 --> 00:33:52,520
Speaker 5: of the stuff that we'll talk about is around that

665
00:33:52,680 --> 00:33:56,640
Speaker 5: kind of team environment and the kindness and the work

666
00:33:56,680 --> 00:33:59,760
Speaker 5: around collaborating with each other and getting the best out

667
00:33:59,800 --> 00:34:03,040
Speaker 5: of what everyone can bring to the table. That's what

668
00:34:03,080 --> 00:34:04,920
Speaker 5: I do a lot of working now, and I love

669
00:34:04,960 --> 00:34:08,239
Speaker 5: that space. I love working with people. Again, it's like

670
00:34:08,719 --> 00:34:10,960
Speaker 5: being in that team sport environment where you just got

671
00:34:10,960 --> 00:34:13,160
Speaker 5: to figure out the best way forward for that group.

672
00:34:13,400 --> 00:34:16,240
Speaker 5: It doesn't always there's not one kind of mold that fit.

673
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:18,520
Speaker 2: Speaks to what you were earlier, and you do a

674
00:34:18,880 --> 00:34:21,920
Speaker 2: I mean, you just so much in the this space.

675
00:34:22,600 --> 00:34:26,800
Speaker 2: I want to Having climbed mountains, and I'm curious about

676
00:34:26,880 --> 00:34:29,880
Speaker 2: this because I'm in this space too, having climbed and

677
00:34:29,880 --> 00:34:33,919
Speaker 2: got to the top of some really big mountains. What's

678
00:34:33,960 --> 00:34:38,320
Speaker 2: the feeling like going back down the mountain and helping

679
00:34:38,400 --> 00:34:41,959
Speaker 2: others get up? Which once again pulls on the threat

680
00:34:41,960 --> 00:34:44,520
Speaker 2: that you were talking about, really where that first part

681
00:34:44,520 --> 00:34:48,480
Speaker 2: of life is probably about about us, and then life

682
00:34:48,960 --> 00:34:51,560
Speaker 2: shifts and it's really you know, not what you can

683
00:34:51,840 --> 00:34:53,440
Speaker 2: get from it, but what you can give to it

684
00:34:53,520 --> 00:34:55,680
Speaker 2: to give to others. What does that feel like for you, guys?

685
00:34:56,320 --> 00:34:56,520
Speaker 1: Yeah?

686
00:34:56,680 --> 00:34:59,360
Speaker 5: I mean to me, like when I talk about it

687
00:34:59,360 --> 00:35:01,000
Speaker 5: and I've said it, so the last part of my

688
00:35:01,040 --> 00:35:03,160
Speaker 5: crew was my best part of my career. I played better,

689
00:35:03,880 --> 00:35:04,960
Speaker 5: I was a better person.

690
00:35:05,360 --> 00:35:06,520
Speaker 3: I enjoyed it far more.

691
00:35:07,080 --> 00:35:09,760
Speaker 5: And it's because even in that moment as an athlete,

692
00:35:09,760 --> 00:35:12,239
Speaker 5: I was the older player, and I got so much

693
00:35:12,280 --> 00:35:15,120
Speaker 5: pride in watching the youngest girls come into the team

694
00:35:15,800 --> 00:35:17,839
Speaker 5: and do their things for the first time, play their

695
00:35:17,840 --> 00:35:20,000
Speaker 5: first game, you know, get out there in a moment,

696
00:35:20,040 --> 00:35:22,400
Speaker 5: and whether it's change a game the way they played

697
00:35:22,560 --> 00:35:24,920
Speaker 5: or beaten opposition that maybe it'd had the best of

698
00:35:24,960 --> 00:35:29,480
Speaker 5: them in the past, and.

699
00:35:27,960 --> 00:35:28,719
Speaker 3: That fueled me.

700
00:35:28,760 --> 00:35:30,880
Speaker 5: That energy that you got and the pride that you

701
00:35:30,920 --> 00:35:33,040
Speaker 5: get from seeing someone do something well or you know

702
00:35:33,120 --> 00:35:34,800
Speaker 5: that's challenged them and you've helped them work on it

703
00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:38,080
Speaker 5: during the week, and just what that can really do

704
00:35:38,680 --> 00:35:42,040
Speaker 5: for them. And I think when you step back and

705
00:35:42,080 --> 00:35:44,160
Speaker 5: now in the workplace that you do seeing people just

706
00:35:44,200 --> 00:35:46,680
Speaker 5: the light bulb moments that they might have where it's like, oh, actually,

707
00:35:46,719 --> 00:35:48,000
Speaker 5: if I think that way, maybe that.

708
00:35:47,960 --> 00:35:48,680
Speaker 3: Is going to help me.

709
00:35:49,320 --> 00:35:51,279
Speaker 5: And you would get it a lot where people will

710
00:35:51,280 --> 00:35:53,120
Speaker 5: come back to you and give you feedback about how

711
00:35:53,239 --> 00:35:55,759
Speaker 5: that made them feel in that moment and what it's

712
00:35:55,840 --> 00:35:58,560
Speaker 5: done for their trajectory. And it's not that you're changing

713
00:35:58,560 --> 00:36:00,920
Speaker 5: their lives. It's just that you'll get them one little

714
00:36:00,920 --> 00:36:04,000
Speaker 5: thing that might help them be in a better space.

715
00:36:04,440 --> 00:36:09,120
Speaker 4: I think if you can help and encourage people to.

716
00:36:10,680 --> 00:36:15,880
Speaker 1: Think more of themselves, like I think most people's biggest

717
00:36:17,040 --> 00:36:21,400
Speaker 1: barrier to success is literally how they think, not their potential,

718
00:36:21,520 --> 00:36:25,040
Speaker 1: not their possibilities, not their genetics. You know, of course

719
00:36:25,080 --> 00:36:29,520
Speaker 1: there are limitations, but you know, it's like, I'm not

720
00:36:29,560 --> 00:36:32,160
Speaker 1: particularly talented. I don't have great genetics. I wasn't a

721
00:36:32,160 --> 00:36:34,279
Speaker 1: brilliant academic. And it's not that I'm the high order

722
00:36:34,320 --> 00:36:37,480
Speaker 1: mark now, but you know, it's like I think for

723
00:36:37,600 --> 00:36:40,920
Speaker 1: some people, and you two are both even though you

724
00:36:40,960 --> 00:36:44,120
Speaker 1: said you're not naturally a great athlete, you're pretty good.

725
00:36:44,200 --> 00:36:45,720
Speaker 2: And I wasn't naturally a good singer.

726
00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:48,719
Speaker 4: Well, I actually think I'm a naturally good singer.

727
00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:50,799
Speaker 2: Just actually, for.

728
00:36:50,840 --> 00:36:54,520
Speaker 1: Me, mediocrity was my superpower because it made me really

729
00:36:54,600 --> 00:36:58,000
Speaker 1: fucking motivated because I knew exactly I just had to

730
00:36:58,040 --> 00:37:01,080
Speaker 1: work harder because if I was going to be able to, Like,

731
00:37:01,120 --> 00:37:04,560
Speaker 1: we had these compulsory cross country runs every week, and

732
00:37:04,719 --> 00:37:06,560
Speaker 1: obviously when I was a fat kid, one hundred and

733
00:37:06,600 --> 00:37:08,960
Speaker 1: thirty kids in my year, every week I would come

734
00:37:08,960 --> 00:37:10,839
Speaker 1: one hundred and thirtieth because I would walk it because

735
00:37:10,840 --> 00:37:13,880
Speaker 1: I couldn't run it. And then six months later I

736
00:37:13,920 --> 00:37:17,480
Speaker 1: was winning every week, week after week after week number one.

737
00:37:18,080 --> 00:37:20,640
Speaker 1: And it wasn't because I was genetically great or fuck,

738
00:37:20,719 --> 00:37:22,600
Speaker 1: he's an athlete, isn't he not. It's like, I just

739
00:37:22,719 --> 00:37:25,000
Speaker 1: ran seven days a week put in the world and

740
00:37:25,080 --> 00:37:26,920
Speaker 1: so I was doing what they weren't doing. And then

741
00:37:26,920 --> 00:37:29,080
Speaker 1: I started to create outcomes. And it wasn't about, oh,

742
00:37:29,080 --> 00:37:31,920
Speaker 1: look at me, I'm a good runner. It was like, ah,

743
00:37:32,320 --> 00:37:38,360
Speaker 1: so if I apply myself, what like what's possible? Because

744
00:37:38,560 --> 00:37:41,120
Speaker 1: my thinking was really the issue. Yeah, I didn't have

745
00:37:41,160 --> 00:37:45,399
Speaker 1: great genetics, but they weren't terrible, right, And I wasn't

746
00:37:45,400 --> 00:37:48,680
Speaker 1: an academic genius but not a moron. It's like, all right, well,

747
00:37:48,719 --> 00:37:50,879
Speaker 1: if I take whatever I've got, whether or not that's

748
00:37:50,920 --> 00:37:56,359
Speaker 1: creativity or intellect or physiology, and I put eleven out

749
00:37:56,400 --> 00:38:00,320
Speaker 1: of ten effort wrapped around that, what might I create?

750
00:38:01,200 --> 00:38:01,400
Speaker 4: You know?

751
00:38:01,560 --> 00:38:03,840
Speaker 1: And because we're all scared and we're all dysfunctional and

752
00:38:03,880 --> 00:38:06,720
Speaker 1: we're all a bit broken, we're also a bit fucking amazing.

753
00:38:07,640 --> 00:38:10,359
Speaker 1: But we need to let the amazing out, and fear

754
00:38:10,440 --> 00:38:13,600
Speaker 1: keeps the amazing in you know, all laziness or avoidance

755
00:38:13,680 --> 00:38:15,440
Speaker 1: or procrastination.

756
00:38:14,760 --> 00:38:18,720
Speaker 2: Or you know whatever, all the derivative fear correct correct.

757
00:38:18,320 --> 00:38:20,759
Speaker 1: And so it's like, if I can get out of

758
00:38:20,800 --> 00:38:24,040
Speaker 1: my own way, if I can I remember having this

759
00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:27,719
Speaker 1: moment the first time, and I don't say this to

760
00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:29,640
Speaker 1: sound anything but just grateful.

761
00:38:30,480 --> 00:38:31,319
Speaker 4: Where I ran an event.

762
00:38:31,360 --> 00:38:34,040
Speaker 1: It was just a me event, just Craig Harper at

763
00:38:34,040 --> 00:38:37,319
Speaker 1: Deacon and six hundred and seventy people in the six

764
00:38:37,400 --> 00:38:41,080
Speaker 1: hundred and seventy person room, and everyone paid to go

765
00:38:41,120 --> 00:38:43,960
Speaker 1: and see me. I wasn't at someone else's event. I

766
00:38:44,000 --> 00:38:46,360
Speaker 1: wasn't at a convention. It wasn't a conference, and I

767
00:38:46,480 --> 00:38:47,440
Speaker 1: was one of the speakers.

768
00:38:48,000 --> 00:38:48,800
Speaker 2: It was like six.

769
00:38:48,800 --> 00:38:53,480
Speaker 1: Hundred and seventy and I remember being blown away, like

770
00:38:53,560 --> 00:38:55,799
Speaker 1: I used to be blown away that one person would

771
00:38:55,800 --> 00:38:58,439
Speaker 1: pay to listen to me, you know, And then six

772
00:38:58,520 --> 00:39:00,960
Speaker 1: hundred and seventy people on the sun they decided to

773
00:39:01,040 --> 00:39:03,960
Speaker 1: come and listen to what I had to say, and

774
00:39:04,040 --> 00:39:07,560
Speaker 1: I just remember thinking, not like ah, I good.

775
00:39:07,600 --> 00:39:10,080
Speaker 4: I remember thinking this is fucking amazing.

776
00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:13,960
Speaker 1: How was this a thing where this many people want

777
00:39:14,000 --> 00:39:16,359
Speaker 1: to come to listen to what I have to say,

778
00:39:17,040 --> 00:39:19,759
Speaker 1: you know? And in that moment it For me, it

779
00:39:19,840 --> 00:39:23,879
Speaker 1: was all about, oh yeah, like, I'm not terrible, I'm

780
00:39:23,920 --> 00:39:27,000
Speaker 1: not the best, but I've got I've got ability, and

781
00:39:27,000 --> 00:39:31,560
Speaker 1: I've got potential that I can optimize and operationalize and

782
00:39:31,600 --> 00:39:34,200
Speaker 1: create some good outcomes. And so because I'm not this

783
00:39:34,320 --> 00:39:37,400
Speaker 1: special human, I love working with other people who have

784
00:39:37,440 --> 00:39:40,719
Speaker 1: got at least as much potential talent and genetic potential

785
00:39:40,760 --> 00:39:43,359
Speaker 1: as me, and go, you know what, I actually think

786
00:39:44,160 --> 00:39:46,920
Speaker 1: if you can, if you can put in the effort

787
00:39:46,960 --> 00:39:50,600
Speaker 1: and energy and courage, you'll do something fucking amazing. And

788
00:39:50,640 --> 00:39:53,719
Speaker 1: when you say that and you mean it, because that

789
00:39:54,760 --> 00:39:57,759
Speaker 1: impacts them, I go, I'm not telling you this because

790
00:39:57,800 --> 00:39:58,640
Speaker 1: this sounds good.

791
00:39:59,000 --> 00:40:02,640
Speaker 4: I'm not saying this inspire you. I truly think I

792
00:40:02,640 --> 00:40:03,760
Speaker 4: don't know if you will.

793
00:40:03,560 --> 00:40:05,920
Speaker 1: By the way, because you might be fucking lazy and

794
00:40:05,960 --> 00:40:08,799
Speaker 1: you might be whatever, But I think you could do

795
00:40:08,880 --> 00:40:09,680
Speaker 1: something special.

796
00:40:10,000 --> 00:40:12,520
Speaker 2: So we've talked a lot about career and success. To

797
00:40:12,800 --> 00:40:15,759
Speaker 2: sort of close out, I want to know, in terms

798
00:40:15,800 --> 00:40:19,719
Speaker 2: of a border spection of life, having you know, being

799
00:40:19,760 --> 00:40:23,680
Speaker 2: in your forties and now sixty and I'm pushing forty

800
00:40:23,840 --> 00:40:25,080
Speaker 2: for you guys.

801
00:40:24,800 --> 00:40:28,360
Speaker 4: What what what tox of forty?

802
00:40:28,640 --> 00:40:35,399
Speaker 2: What? What does a more rounded life of success, look

803
00:40:36,280 --> 00:40:40,000
Speaker 2: like you go, a successful rounded life look for look

804
00:40:40,120 --> 00:40:41,040
Speaker 2: like for you guys.

805
00:40:41,040 --> 00:40:44,200
Speaker 1: Now, I think because my life is quite a typical

806
00:40:44,320 --> 00:40:46,720
Speaker 1: in that I'm not married, I don't have a partner,

807
00:40:46,760 --> 00:40:50,120
Speaker 1: I don't have kids, and there ain't many sixty year

808
00:40:50,160 --> 00:40:52,640
Speaker 1: olds who are like that or who have never had that.

809
00:40:52,719 --> 00:40:53,360
Speaker 2: Are you wanting that?

810
00:40:55,000 --> 00:40:58,239
Speaker 4: I don't think. I don't think she's toddy in here.

811
00:40:59,719 --> 00:41:00,800
Speaker 2: See, I mean.

812
00:41:02,440 --> 00:41:07,840
Speaker 1: Got this bit. I don't not want it, you know.

813
00:41:07,920 --> 00:41:10,680
Speaker 1: But it's not like on my to do list, you know.

814
00:41:12,440 --> 00:41:16,440
Speaker 1: But it's like, in some ways being single is an

815
00:41:16,480 --> 00:41:18,880
Speaker 1: advantage in some ways not you know, some way is

816
00:41:18,920 --> 00:41:22,319
Speaker 1: the opposite. But I mean, like you, and this is

817
00:41:22,400 --> 00:41:26,719
Speaker 1: no revelation, this is no massive insight, but you get

818
00:41:26,760 --> 00:41:28,800
Speaker 1: to the point where you realize that really what matters

819
00:41:28,880 --> 00:41:32,319
Speaker 1: is connection and love and people and when you when

820
00:41:32,320 --> 00:41:35,680
Speaker 1: you're younger, it's more more about ticking boxes and hitting

821
00:41:35,719 --> 00:41:39,520
Speaker 1: KPIs and you know, ticking the to do list or whatever.

822
00:41:41,080 --> 00:41:43,520
Speaker 4: Not always not everyone, of course, but for me it was.

823
00:41:44,480 --> 00:41:47,520
Speaker 1: But then you know, for me, it's like I kind

824
00:41:47,560 --> 00:41:50,920
Speaker 1: of have a family of people around me that I

825
00:41:50,960 --> 00:41:53,719
Speaker 1: intersect with, that I coach, that I mentor that I

826
00:41:53,800 --> 00:41:58,200
Speaker 1: encourage that I love, and when they do great, it

827
00:41:58,320 --> 00:42:04,279
Speaker 1: makes me happy, you know. So yeah, yeah, so yeah,

828
00:42:04,320 --> 00:42:06,400
Speaker 1: And I don't you know, I've got old parents. My

829
00:42:06,520 --> 00:42:09,279
Speaker 1: mum's eighty five in a minute, and my dad's eighty five,

830
00:42:09,320 --> 00:42:13,000
Speaker 1: and you know, so things change and your priorities shift,

831
00:42:13,080 --> 00:42:16,719
Speaker 1: and so most of like my priority in life right

832
00:42:16,760 --> 00:42:20,880
Speaker 1: now is them, yeah, you know, and just they're you know,

833
00:42:20,920 --> 00:42:23,960
Speaker 1: they're on the home straight, and just that they're as

834
00:42:24,120 --> 00:42:25,239
Speaker 1: okay as they can be.

835
00:42:25,400 --> 00:42:28,840
Speaker 4: And I be the best son that I can be

836
00:42:28,960 --> 00:42:29,879
Speaker 4: for them, you know.

837
00:42:30,120 --> 00:42:33,640
Speaker 1: And so that's like I think when you know, when

838
00:42:33,680 --> 00:42:37,600
Speaker 1: people are sick or when things you know, when you

839
00:42:37,680 --> 00:42:41,360
Speaker 1: have somebody that you know, it's like my training partner

840
00:42:41,640 --> 00:42:43,880
Speaker 1: literally died in the gym five years ago, Like he

841
00:42:43,920 --> 00:42:45,880
Speaker 1: had a heart attack. No he didn't, He had a

842
00:42:45,920 --> 00:42:49,279
Speaker 1: cardiac arrest and died. He's fine, he came back, but

843
00:42:49,360 --> 00:42:51,640
Speaker 1: he was dead for seventeen minutes. And I don't meant

844
00:42:51,640 --> 00:42:55,360
Speaker 1: to be melodramatic, because he's fine now. But when somebody

845
00:42:55,400 --> 00:42:58,120
Speaker 1: that you love is literally dying in front of you,

846
00:42:58,640 --> 00:43:02,359
Speaker 1: and you the person, like you're the person that's going

847
00:43:02,440 --> 00:43:07,640
Speaker 1: to maybe allow them to keep living, or it's I

848
00:43:07,680 --> 00:43:09,880
Speaker 1: didn't mean to go here anyway, but it's just what happened.

849
00:43:09,920 --> 00:43:12,560
Speaker 1: It's like, oh my god, like nothing matters in the world.

850
00:43:13,440 --> 00:43:16,960
Speaker 1: Like and it's amazing when when that's going on, how

851
00:43:17,560 --> 00:43:22,200
Speaker 1: how much absolute clarity and focus you have about what

852
00:43:22,360 --> 00:43:26,640
Speaker 1: is important and what is what isn't important? Is most

853
00:43:26,640 --> 00:43:29,319
Speaker 1: of what I think is important? Do you know what

854
00:43:29,320 --> 00:43:29,640
Speaker 1: I mean?

855
00:43:29,880 --> 00:43:32,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, so you're basically like here, I don't know if

856
00:43:32,200 --> 00:43:35,080
Speaker 2: it work in about but with relation with your parents

857
00:43:35,080 --> 00:43:37,880
Speaker 2: and relation with the gym partner, it's love overrides everything.

858
00:43:38,560 --> 00:43:41,279
Speaker 4: Yeah, And and like what.

859
00:43:42,880 --> 00:43:44,879
Speaker 1: You know, the insection of what I'm talking about now

860
00:43:44,880 --> 00:43:46,440
Speaker 1: in a bit of science is that you know, when

861
00:43:46,480 --> 00:43:50,080
Speaker 1: we talk about health, wellness, long longevity, success performance, we

862
00:43:50,160 --> 00:43:53,000
Speaker 1: talk in a physical sense. We talk about you know,

863
00:43:53,080 --> 00:43:58,040
Speaker 1: lifestyle and nutrition and sleep and exercise and occupational activity

864
00:43:58,080 --> 00:44:01,200
Speaker 1: and incidental activity. And but now more and more we

865
00:44:01,239 --> 00:44:03,920
Speaker 1: know the research tells us that may be the most

866
00:44:03,920 --> 00:44:09,360
Speaker 1: important thing in terms of immune system function, health, longevity,

867
00:44:10,719 --> 00:44:16,359
Speaker 1: nervous system, gut health is our social life is our

868
00:44:16,360 --> 00:44:19,480
Speaker 1: relationships is if you get somebody who ticks all the

869
00:44:19,520 --> 00:44:23,120
Speaker 1: other boxes, you know, great diet, great lifestyle, no boozs,

870
00:44:23,239 --> 00:44:25,760
Speaker 1: no drugs, They work out all the time, but they're lonely.

871
00:44:26,960 --> 00:44:32,399
Speaker 1: It's not a good recipe. Yeah, so love connection. There's

872
00:44:32,440 --> 00:44:37,000
Speaker 1: an absolute correlation between you know, the emotional, the psychological,

873
00:44:37,040 --> 00:44:39,960
Speaker 1: the sociological, and the physical consequence of.

874
00:44:39,960 --> 00:44:40,319
Speaker 4: All of that.

875
00:44:41,920 --> 00:44:46,000
Speaker 2: So that's so having love in your life, regardless of

876
00:44:46,000 --> 00:44:48,360
Speaker 2: whether it's a partner with kids, or whether.

877
00:44:48,200 --> 00:44:53,680
Speaker 1: Or not it's romantic love or you know, elaborador called Scooby.

878
00:44:53,360 --> 00:44:56,320
Speaker 2: Doo, but you yeah, you've got lots of love in

879
00:44:56,640 --> 00:45:00,000
Speaker 2: your life and that feels like a big measure of success.

880
00:45:00,160 --> 00:45:03,120
Speaker 4: And also for me, having purpose, Like the idea of

881
00:45:04,040 --> 00:45:07,640
Speaker 4: retirement has zero appealed to me, and not because I'm

882
00:45:07,640 --> 00:45:14,680
Speaker 4: a workaholic, but I've watched many people many retire and

883
00:45:15,239 --> 00:45:18,279
Speaker 4: spiral like we have this story in our head that

884
00:45:18,320 --> 00:45:21,880
Speaker 4: retirement is good. It actually measurement.

885
00:45:22,080 --> 00:45:26,239
Speaker 1: It depends what retirement is, you know, if like you

886
00:45:26,320 --> 00:45:30,720
Speaker 1: think about like my dad went literally from managing multi

887
00:45:30,800 --> 00:45:34,440
Speaker 1: billion dollar shopping centers where he had lots of people

888
00:45:34,480 --> 00:45:38,480
Speaker 1: that he was leading. He had purpose, he had meetings,

889
00:45:38,520 --> 00:45:43,480
Speaker 1: he had constant conversations, problem solving, creating things. You know,

890
00:45:43,600 --> 00:45:46,720
Speaker 1: on a Friday, he retires the Monday. His biggest project

891
00:45:46,840 --> 00:45:50,200
Speaker 1: is what to watch or whether or not he's going

892
00:45:50,200 --> 00:45:53,120
Speaker 1: to go look at the tomatoes, and I reckon my

893
00:45:53,200 --> 00:45:57,839
Speaker 1: dad aged five years in five months. Yeah, because we

894
00:45:57,920 --> 00:46:00,000
Speaker 1: need whether or not it's at work or somewhere else,

895
00:46:00,800 --> 00:46:03,640
Speaker 1: we need a purpose, We need a reason, we need

896
00:46:03,680 --> 00:46:06,720
Speaker 1: a thing to do, and we need to fucking keep

897
00:46:06,800 --> 00:46:11,240
Speaker 1: using our brain. You know, we need to. I believe

898
00:46:11,280 --> 00:46:14,600
Speaker 1: I'm very passionate about this. Like I'm sixty one, my

899
00:46:14,600 --> 00:46:17,279
Speaker 1: brain works as well or better than when I was thirty. Yeah,

900
00:46:17,400 --> 00:46:20,680
Speaker 1: Like my cognitive function only because I do the work

901
00:46:21,160 --> 00:46:24,800
Speaker 1: is right up there for my potential. But it's because

902
00:46:24,960 --> 00:46:27,120
Speaker 1: I'm doing a PhD. It's because I read every day.

903
00:46:27,120 --> 00:46:28,920
Speaker 1: It's because I teach every day. It's because I'm mentor

904
00:46:28,920 --> 00:46:31,960
Speaker 1: every day. It's because I fucking think deeply. Like we

905
00:46:32,000 --> 00:46:33,960
Speaker 1: take our body to gym, we need to take our

906
00:46:34,000 --> 00:46:36,920
Speaker 1: brain to the gym and keep doing it. And if

907
00:46:36,960 --> 00:46:40,279
Speaker 1: you're over fifty listening to this, even more so, do

908
00:46:40,320 --> 00:46:43,560
Speaker 1: you need to do it? Train your brain lift heavy things.

909
00:46:44,360 --> 00:46:45,160
Speaker 1: That's my advice.

910
00:46:45,520 --> 00:46:48,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, And you speak to that purpose thing, and we're

911
00:46:48,040 --> 00:46:50,400
Speaker 2: spoke to it in this chat. In some way I

912
00:46:50,480 --> 00:46:54,960
Speaker 2: think we're we basically need to ask ourselves three questions

913
00:46:55,480 --> 00:46:57,840
Speaker 2: in life. That I think are potentially the most important

914
00:46:57,840 --> 00:47:00,640
Speaker 2: existential questions, which is who am I. We've discussed that

915
00:47:00,680 --> 00:47:03,920
Speaker 2: a lot around the awareness chat. What do I want

916
00:47:03,960 --> 00:47:06,920
Speaker 2: to feel? You know, not just what do I want

917
00:47:06,960 --> 00:47:09,120
Speaker 2: to do? What do I want to feel? And what's

918
00:47:09,160 --> 00:47:11,640
Speaker 2: my what's my purpose? And I think if you can

919
00:47:11,719 --> 00:47:14,080
Speaker 2: answer those things, and I think some people kind even

920
00:47:14,080 --> 00:47:16,919
Speaker 2: answer the first one, they didn't even know who they are.

921
00:47:17,200 --> 00:47:20,840
Speaker 2: But if you're can answer those three questions, and and

922
00:47:20,920 --> 00:47:24,719
Speaker 2: it might shift and you know, move in some in

923
00:47:24,719 --> 00:47:27,480
Speaker 2: some ways. But the three questions I think are really

924
00:47:27,480 --> 00:47:31,120
Speaker 2: important to come back to often in life. And yeah,

925
00:47:31,280 --> 00:47:34,400
Speaker 2: going back to the original question, what does a rounded

926
00:47:34,440 --> 00:47:36,640
Speaker 2: life as success look like to you? Now?

927
00:47:36,800 --> 00:47:37,880
Speaker 3: Well, I mean.

928
00:47:39,239 --> 00:47:42,360
Speaker 5: Praying I probably hit nail on ahead, but just around

929
00:47:42,520 --> 00:47:44,400
Speaker 5: that love element, being able to do what you love

930
00:47:44,760 --> 00:47:47,160
Speaker 5: and spend time with people that you love like. I

931
00:47:47,160 --> 00:47:51,280
Speaker 5: think it's quite simple now, not as in it's simple

932
00:47:51,320 --> 00:47:53,880
Speaker 5: to do, but it's just if you can do that

933
00:47:53,920 --> 00:47:57,480
Speaker 5: and find that and chase that feeling of things that

934
00:47:57,560 --> 00:47:59,560
Speaker 5: make you feel good and that you love to do,

935
00:47:59,680 --> 00:48:01,880
Speaker 5: to be able to make that and call that a job,

936
00:48:01,960 --> 00:48:06,000
Speaker 5: I think I feel very grateful and I want to

937
00:48:06,040 --> 00:48:07,840
Speaker 5: be able to continue to do that as for as

938
00:48:07,920 --> 00:48:11,080
Speaker 5: long as I can, because I give my best to

939
00:48:11,160 --> 00:48:13,200
Speaker 5: it because of it, you know, because I love it.

940
00:48:14,239 --> 00:48:17,759
Speaker 5: And then obviously being and surrounding yourself with all the

941
00:48:17,760 --> 00:48:19,360
Speaker 5: people that you want to spend time with.

942
00:48:19,760 --> 00:48:23,279
Speaker 2: Love and share love. Yeah, which is you know, to

943
00:48:23,480 --> 00:48:28,759
Speaker 2: end a full circle back to Chris Martin Good gave

944
00:48:28,880 --> 00:48:31,279
Speaker 2: so much and it's yeah, that's the connection that we're after.

945
00:48:31,320 --> 00:48:33,359
Speaker 2: That is the that's the oneness. You know, when we're

946
00:48:33,600 --> 00:48:37,480
Speaker 2: in that space of love, we feel such a oneness. Guys,

947
00:48:38,160 --> 00:48:42,560
Speaker 2: chatters hearts, thank you so much for coming on today.

948
00:48:42,600 --> 00:48:44,799
Speaker 2: It's been amazing to chat. I love that we've gone

949
00:48:44,840 --> 00:48:48,239
Speaker 2: down the path of success and it's led us to

950
00:48:48,280 --> 00:48:51,560
Speaker 2: so many different tangents. Thanks to you for your energy

951
00:48:51,600 --> 00:48:54,920
Speaker 2: and passion and wisdom and experience and all and all

952
00:48:54,960 --> 00:48:57,800
Speaker 2: those shares. I really appreciate having you both on you

953
00:48:57,960 --> 00:48:58,560
Speaker 2: It's been great.

954
00:48:58,920 --> 00:49:05,200
Speaker 4: Thank you. Good seech, good sneer mate, Thanks mate.

955
00:49:05,640 --> 00:49:05,719
Speaker 1: M.

956
00:49:12,440 --> 00:49:13,400
Speaker 2: Well there you go. Gang.

957
00:49:13,560 --> 00:49:16,040
Speaker 1: I hope you enjoyed that. I love him. He's a

958
00:49:16,080 --> 00:49:19,600
Speaker 1: good dude. I love her, she's ace And of course

959
00:49:19,960 --> 00:49:21,919
Speaker 1: I love you. See you next time.