1 00:00:00,320 --> 00:00:03,200 Speaker 1: This is the Fits and Whip with Kate Richie podcast. 2 00:00:03,400 --> 00:00:04,520 Speaker 2: Have I got something on my nose? 3 00:00:04,640 --> 00:00:05,800 Speaker 1: Nose? 4 00:00:06,240 --> 00:00:09,879 Speaker 2: Oh? Sorry? We wiped his nose And then I thought 5 00:00:09,880 --> 00:00:12,520 Speaker 2: he was being very considerate that I might have had 6 00:00:12,520 --> 00:00:15,480 Speaker 2: something today on my nose. But then I realized Whip 7 00:00:15,520 --> 00:00:17,040 Speaker 2: is the kind of guy who would let you walk 8 00:00:17,040 --> 00:00:18,160 Speaker 2: around the office with. 9 00:00:18,079 --> 00:00:19,240 Speaker 1: That on your nose. 10 00:00:19,320 --> 00:00:22,120 Speaker 3: I'd pick it for you. 11 00:00:22,960 --> 00:00:26,320 Speaker 2: Yes, how to spot a cheetah? There's a guy. I mean, look, 12 00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:29,800 Speaker 2: there's so many of these kind of stories. This guy's 13 00:00:29,960 --> 00:00:34,000 Speaker 2: out of some university in Istanbul and he's only surveyed 14 00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:37,239 Speaker 2: two hundred and eighty people. So let's just take this 15 00:00:37,320 --> 00:00:39,800 Speaker 2: with the graves we gore. 16 00:00:40,560 --> 00:00:42,720 Speaker 1: Is one of them being in bed with somebody else? 17 00:00:42,720 --> 00:00:47,360 Speaker 2: Well, yeah, that's a clanger, but that's that's not a 18 00:00:47,400 --> 00:00:51,040 Speaker 2: red flag. That's absolutely it's happening right now. 19 00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:53,880 Speaker 1: But that there are red cars. There are four. 20 00:00:56,360 --> 00:00:59,400 Speaker 2: And these are the red flags to look out for 21 00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:02,280 Speaker 2: a hiss of cheating on a prior romantic partner. 22 00:01:02,400 --> 00:01:04,600 Speaker 1: So if you've got four makes sense. 23 00:01:04,680 --> 00:01:07,600 Speaker 2: If you and I always think about this, if you've 24 00:01:07,640 --> 00:01:11,600 Speaker 2: met your partner and they had a partner when they 25 00:01:11,680 --> 00:01:16,520 Speaker 2: met you, and somehow you thought you won the prize. 26 00:01:17,240 --> 00:01:20,880 Speaker 2: They have form of not having the ability to get 27 00:01:20,920 --> 00:01:24,360 Speaker 2: out of a relationship before they get into a new one. Interesting, 28 00:01:24,720 --> 00:01:28,160 Speaker 2: do you know, So if they've cheated on their past partner, 29 00:01:29,240 --> 00:01:33,320 Speaker 2: I mean, they might argue that you were the one. Yes, 30 00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:35,880 Speaker 2: they can. It takes a lot of hard work and therapy, 31 00:01:36,080 --> 00:01:36,800 Speaker 2: but they can to. 32 00:01:36,959 --> 00:01:42,840 Speaker 1: Okay, grew up with and his nickname was the leopard. 33 00:01:42,880 --> 00:01:48,840 Speaker 3: He begged everybody to stop calling him the leopard because 34 00:01:48,840 --> 00:01:50,720 Speaker 3: he fell in love with a girl and wanted to 35 00:01:50,720 --> 00:01:51,400 Speaker 3: stay with her. 36 00:01:51,920 --> 00:01:54,360 Speaker 2: Ah And it's yeah, that's not fair. 37 00:01:54,520 --> 00:01:54,760 Speaker 1: No. 38 00:01:55,160 --> 00:01:57,840 Speaker 2: Number two. One of their parents had an affair in 39 00:01:57,880 --> 00:01:58,440 Speaker 2: the past. 40 00:01:58,680 --> 00:01:59,880 Speaker 1: That's an interesting one. 41 00:02:00,360 --> 00:02:03,040 Speaker 2: Does it play out in your adult life what you 42 00:02:03,160 --> 00:02:05,920 Speaker 2: might witness as a child, Well, it's called role modeling, 43 00:02:06,120 --> 00:02:09,360 Speaker 2: I guess. I mean it can go one of two ways. 44 00:02:09,720 --> 00:02:11,960 Speaker 2: I'm never going to do the things that I saw 45 00:02:12,360 --> 00:02:14,600 Speaker 2: in my childhood, and I don't ever want to be 46 00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:17,000 Speaker 2: like you know, marm or dad or whatever. That would 47 00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:20,200 Speaker 2: be the most natural way, wouldn't you You'll deserve and 48 00:02:20,360 --> 00:02:22,560 Speaker 2: go I don't like that, so I won't do that. Well, 49 00:02:22,600 --> 00:02:25,200 Speaker 2: you might have those feelings, but there might be some 50 00:02:25,320 --> 00:02:29,680 Speaker 2: kind of genetic code that is it hereditary. 51 00:02:29,800 --> 00:02:31,760 Speaker 1: I mean, is it in the genes for you to 52 00:02:31,800 --> 00:02:32,800 Speaker 1: take off your jeans? 53 00:02:33,560 --> 00:02:37,320 Speaker 2: Good? But it is not as good as dissatisfaction. 54 00:02:38,800 --> 00:02:39,200 Speaker 1: If you have. 55 00:02:39,320 --> 00:02:42,600 Speaker 2: Caught cheating, Kate Richie, could you then say I'm so sorry. 56 00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:46,600 Speaker 1: It wasn't me, it's dad's It's like my dad, his dad. 57 00:02:46,720 --> 00:02:47,520 Speaker 1: It's in the genes. 58 00:02:47,880 --> 00:02:50,560 Speaker 2: Well, I guess you could. I mean usually you just deny, 59 00:02:50,720 --> 00:02:54,240 Speaker 2: don't you. That's how it starts out, and then then 60 00:02:54,400 --> 00:02:57,720 Speaker 2: people come up with as many excuses as possible. And 61 00:02:57,800 --> 00:03:02,799 Speaker 2: I'm not judging cheaters, No I'm not, because I do 62 00:03:02,880 --> 00:03:05,320 Speaker 2: think there are I don't think anything is ever black 63 00:03:05,360 --> 00:03:09,080 Speaker 2: and white, but I think if you're a serial cheater, 64 00:03:09,840 --> 00:03:13,399 Speaker 2: then then it's yeah, it's a way of life. Number three, 65 00:03:13,880 --> 00:03:19,400 Speaker 2: high levels of attachment avoidance, so that they are likely 66 00:03:19,600 --> 00:03:20,120 Speaker 2: to cheat. 67 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:21,480 Speaker 1: This is how I read it. 68 00:03:22,400 --> 00:03:28,279 Speaker 2: If they have an avoidant tendencies, meaning their love avoidance 69 00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:31,400 Speaker 2: or attachment avoidance, so they don't they can't kind of 70 00:03:31,440 --> 00:03:32,040 Speaker 2: commit to you. 71 00:03:32,080 --> 00:03:35,600 Speaker 1: To anything, your car, you know. 72 00:03:35,760 --> 00:03:37,760 Speaker 2: You well, yeah, no, that's sort of. 73 00:03:37,680 --> 00:03:38,440 Speaker 1: Me at the moment. 74 00:03:39,160 --> 00:03:42,440 Speaker 3: It's the end of the year, we're tired work, you're 75 00:03:42,480 --> 00:03:46,600 Speaker 3: looking forward to Christmas, holidays, and BJ's sort of. She's 76 00:03:46,640 --> 00:03:48,360 Speaker 3: doing a lot of Can I get two minutes of 77 00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:50,640 Speaker 3: your time? Okay, two minutes of your time right now? 78 00:03:50,760 --> 00:03:52,640 Speaker 1: Okay, two minutes, let's do it. 79 00:03:52,680 --> 00:03:59,160 Speaker 2: But are you treating her like you treat us? But 80 00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:01,640 Speaker 2: as long as you know as you love, I mean, 81 00:04:01,640 --> 00:04:04,040 Speaker 2: there's no doubt of how much love you have for her. 82 00:04:04,200 --> 00:04:07,760 Speaker 1: Of course, and we still say that to each other, but. 83 00:04:07,720 --> 00:04:10,240 Speaker 3: We mean, probably a good opportunity to tell you guys 84 00:04:10,280 --> 00:04:13,040 Speaker 3: that I'm cheating on you and I'm doing a show 85 00:04:13,120 --> 00:04:17,719 Speaker 3: with smallziness. It's in Whipper with Kate Ritchie is a 86 00:04:17,760 --> 00:04:20,120 Speaker 3: Nova podcast walk great shows like this. 87 00:04:20,440 --> 00:04:23,560 Speaker 2: Download the Nova player by the app Store or Google 88 00:04:23,600 --> 00:04:24,960 Speaker 2: Playing the player