WEBVTT - #1898 Interviewed by a Listener (the last bit) - Kelly Smith 0:00:00.400 --> 0:00:03.000 Oh good a you bloody champions. It's Kelly, it's Craig, 0:00:03.080 --> 0:00:05.480 it's us. We're back. It's you know what was going 0:00:05.519 --> 0:00:08.600 to happen everyone? Kelly and I were going to record 0:00:08.680 --> 0:00:12.600 three five question podcasts in a row last night. So 0:00:12.640 --> 0:00:15.040 it's Wednesday night, the twenty eighth of the fifth, twenty 0:00:15.200 --> 0:00:18.640 twenty five as we record this, but I have this 0:00:18.720 --> 0:00:22.680 ongoing ear ear issue which sounds so bloody ridiculous, Kelly, 0:00:22.760 --> 0:00:27.880 doesn't it so so nothing so marculous it is it is, 0:00:28.040 --> 0:00:32.199 And it's like it's not painful, it's not. But what 0:00:32.320 --> 0:00:37.280 happens everyone is, and it's happening right now. Is my 0:00:37.440 --> 0:00:39.879 left no, my right ear what it varies, but at 0:00:39.920 --> 0:00:42.680 the moment it's my right ear totally blocks and so 0:00:42.760 --> 0:00:48.240 it makes concentration and communication and focus very hard. And 0:00:48.600 --> 0:00:52.080 so we recorded too, and we're about to record the third. 0:00:52.080 --> 0:00:55.640 In fact, we started the third and Fatty Harps's ear blocked. 0:00:56.080 --> 0:00:58.560 It's like somebody just walks up and puts their finger 0:00:58.760 --> 0:01:02.120 right in your ear, and so everything I say comes 0:01:02.160 --> 0:01:06.560 back into my head and there's like this weird pressure 0:01:06.640 --> 0:01:09.400 in my ear right now. But I realized to the world, 0:01:10.560 --> 0:01:12.360 they don't hear any of that, they don't sense any 0:01:12.400 --> 0:01:15.160 of that. So I'm going to sold John Kell. I'm 0:01:15.160 --> 0:01:17.360 going to see how I go. We might have a 0:01:17.400 --> 0:01:20.560 little break or two, but right now it's like somebody's 0:01:20.560 --> 0:01:24.040 put a block of cheese in my right ear and 0:01:24.120 --> 0:01:27.560 my voice in my head is very fucking loud. But 0:01:27.720 --> 0:01:30.240 we'll do our very best. And we were chatting just 0:01:30.280 --> 0:01:33.039 before we came on. You had a bit of a 0:01:33.080 --> 0:01:36.640 listen today, so the first episode went up today. Is 0:01:36.680 --> 0:01:38.480 it hard listening to yourself? 0:01:39.720 --> 0:01:43.160 It's interesting listening to yourself. And I think there's always 0:01:43.200 --> 0:01:47.280 that thing your voice sounds different, and you're obviously experiencing 0:01:47.319 --> 0:01:50.320 that right now in your own head, but your voice 0:01:50.800 --> 0:01:54.600 sounds different when you hear it back. I did think 0:01:54.960 --> 0:01:58.800 it was different hearing your responses in a different context 0:01:58.840 --> 0:02:03.760 of just being the listener, not the interviewer. And I'm 0:02:03.840 --> 0:02:06.920 still determined to learn how to serve. That would be 0:02:06.920 --> 0:02:12.000 pretty cool. And yeah, no, I got a lot out 0:02:12.040 --> 0:02:14.000 of it, so I hope other people did as well. 0:02:14.840 --> 0:02:17.040 Yeah no, you asked some really good questions. And we 0:02:17.040 --> 0:02:19.200 were talking before and I said one of the things 0:02:19.240 --> 0:02:24.440 that I find like, I get it, but for me, 0:02:24.560 --> 0:02:27.720 who's the subject of that curious is how many people 0:02:27.760 --> 0:02:31.120 want to know, Like a lot of people don't. Of course, 0:02:31.320 --> 0:02:33.359 if I was a listener, I would not want to know. 0:02:34.000 --> 0:02:36.160 I wouldn't give a fuck about what Craig Carpet eats 0:02:36.240 --> 0:02:38.440 or how he lives, or why he's married or not married, 0:02:38.560 --> 0:02:41.280 or you know, like, but so many people care about 0:02:41.320 --> 0:02:42.640 what I do and why I do it and when 0:02:42.720 --> 0:02:44.359 did you start that? And how long you've been doing that? 0:02:44.400 --> 0:02:46.959 And why don't you eat lunch? And you know, how 0:02:46.960 --> 0:02:48.560 far do you walk every day? And how often do 0:02:48.560 --> 0:02:51.320 you lift weights? And do you do machine weights as well? 0:02:51.360 --> 0:02:54.959 Or would you do anything like pilates or body weight 0:02:55.040 --> 0:02:57.639 circuits or you know, like so many people are interested in, 0:02:59.280 --> 0:03:02.440 like how I live my life on a personal operational level. 0:03:03.440 --> 0:03:08.360 And for me, that's very amusing because I feel like 0:03:08.520 --> 0:03:12.919 I'm one of the most boring fucking people in the 0:03:12.960 --> 0:03:17.160 Bayside area of Melbourne right And I'm not fishing, Like 0:03:17.800 --> 0:03:20.400 my life is so boring, Like I live by myself. 0:03:20.440 --> 0:03:22.680 I don't drink, I don't smoke. I walk to the 0:03:22.680 --> 0:03:25.239 cafe every day, I have a coffee, eat the same 0:03:25.280 --> 0:03:27.400 breakfast every day. I eat a version of the same 0:03:27.400 --> 0:03:29.920 dinner every day. I don't eat through the day. If 0:03:29.919 --> 0:03:32.360 I'm hungry, I have maybe a few almonds or something 0:03:32.440 --> 0:03:34.679 like that. You know, I lift weights. You know, it's 0:03:34.720 --> 0:03:37.960 like it's very it's kind of groundhog day. I mean, 0:03:38.000 --> 0:03:40.120 there are different things because I do work with different 0:03:40.120 --> 0:03:43.080 teams and groups and individuals and organizations, and I travel 0:03:43.080 --> 0:03:45.960 a bit. But I talk about a lot of the 0:03:46.000 --> 0:03:51.000 same stuff. But I think what keeps me sane is 0:03:52.640 --> 0:03:56.080 the fact that I do something that I truly love 0:03:56.240 --> 0:03:59.000 and it doesn't feel like work. You know. It's like 0:03:59.040 --> 0:04:01.920 apart from this annoying ear I've got right now, like 0:04:02.080 --> 0:04:04.520 I'm talking to you, somebody that I like, somebody that 0:04:04.600 --> 0:04:07.000 I have a good connection with, and we're talking about 0:04:07.080 --> 0:04:10.080 things that are of interest to me and hopefully you 0:04:10.120 --> 0:04:14.400 and hopefully the listeners. And there's no sense at the moment, 0:04:15.680 --> 0:04:18.080 or there's no feeling of oh my god, I'm working. 0:04:18.880 --> 0:04:21.960 You know, I'm working. I've got to do this because 0:04:22.120 --> 0:04:24.719 you know, this is what I do. I'm a podcaster. 0:04:25.560 --> 0:04:28.000 Oh fuck, I better do another. You know. There's none 0:04:28.040 --> 0:04:30.919 of that. There's none of that. There's just like the 0:04:31.040 --> 0:04:33.120 experience and. 0:04:33.160 --> 0:04:36.760 That's the dream. Right Like I work at a place 0:04:36.839 --> 0:04:39.479 that I really enjoy working at. And you know, there's 0:04:39.560 --> 0:04:41.680 days when there's things that you have to do. Sure, 0:04:42.320 --> 0:04:45.200 but I've got a really great team and I get 0:04:45.240 --> 0:04:47.520 to work with some really great people. So I work 0:04:47.560 --> 0:04:51.599 with adults with disability, and I think that's an absolute 0:04:52.240 --> 0:04:54.279 honor to be able to do that. So I love 0:04:54.320 --> 0:04:58.120 my job so I can relate to that, and I think, 0:04:58.760 --> 0:05:01.240 I think that's the absolute dream, isn't it to have 0:05:02.000 --> 0:05:04.520 something in your life that you I mean, technically it's 0:05:04.520 --> 0:05:07.000 called work, but it doesn't feel like it for the 0:05:07.000 --> 0:05:07.919 majority of the time. 0:05:09.120 --> 0:05:12.520 And I think that's the thing, like if you can, 0:05:13.000 --> 0:05:15.760 I mean, and look, it sounds judgmental because there are 0:05:15.760 --> 0:05:18.040 a lot of people who don't necessarily love what they do, 0:05:18.120 --> 0:05:22.200 but they don't necessarily hate it, but it ticks the 0:05:22.200 --> 0:05:24.200 boxes that they want to tick. It's like, well, it's 0:05:24.200 --> 0:05:26.479 pretty good money. I don't hate it. It's close to 0:05:26.560 --> 0:05:30.000 home or I'm working from home. I've got the skills, 0:05:31.760 --> 0:05:33.600 I know how to do. It doesn't cause me a 0:05:33.600 --> 0:05:36.440 lot of stress and anxiety. I get four weeks or 0:05:36.480 --> 0:05:38.800 six weeks, annual holiday or whatever it is. I get 0:05:39.279 --> 0:05:41.320 you know, sick pay, I get this, I get that 0:05:42.000 --> 0:05:46.120 and for many people that's a beautiful operating system or 0:05:46.160 --> 0:05:49.880 that's a beautiful, beautiful model of career or work for them. 0:05:50.640 --> 0:05:53.760 And we as we've spoken about many times, you know, 0:05:53.920 --> 0:05:56.320 it's like what works for Kelly won't work for Craig, 0:05:56.440 --> 0:05:58.400 or what works for Craig won't work for Brian or 0:05:58.480 --> 0:06:01.320 Dave or Sally. Right, So it's trying to figure out, 0:06:02.520 --> 0:06:06.119 you know, while for some people to do my job 0:06:06.240 --> 0:06:10.000 where there's very little security, where I don't have a 0:06:10.080 --> 0:06:13.680 set wage, I don't have I don't have you know, 0:06:13.920 --> 0:06:16.640 holiday pay, I don't have sick pay. I don't have 0:06:17.200 --> 0:06:19.120 a lot of things, a lot of the benefits that 0:06:19.160 --> 0:06:22.080 come with a good job. But what I do have 0:06:22.440 --> 0:06:24.760 is I have a life that doesn't really feel like 0:06:25.000 --> 0:06:29.919 I ever work, you know, I mean, which sounds weird, 0:06:29.960 --> 0:06:33.760 but like there are some things that are you know, 0:06:33.839 --> 0:06:37.279 more challenging and difficult than other things. But yeah, I 0:06:37.279 --> 0:06:42.960 guess because I don't have any what's the word set 0:06:43.000 --> 0:06:45.480 protocol where I've got to be at a certain place 0:06:45.640 --> 0:06:48.520 every time each day and then go and sit in 0:06:48.560 --> 0:06:50.320 that room and then do these things, or I've got 0:06:50.360 --> 0:06:52.800 to be I've got to jump in that truck every 0:06:52.839 --> 0:06:55.320 morning and then deliver those things or whatever it is. 0:06:55.360 --> 0:06:57.280 You know, none of those things are bad. In fact, 0:06:57.279 --> 0:07:00.880 for many people, they're great. But I think that's one 0:07:00.960 --> 0:07:03.120 of the things is trying to figure out and we 0:07:03.200 --> 0:07:06.640 spoke about I don't know it's episode one or two, 0:07:06.720 --> 0:07:09.960 but trying to figure out what not what's optimal, but 0:07:10.040 --> 0:07:12.200 what's optimal for you, you know, And we talk about 0:07:12.240 --> 0:07:16.160 you know, food and exercise and sleep and managing stress 0:07:16.160 --> 0:07:19.040 and anxiety and the kind of relationship that works for 0:07:19.120 --> 0:07:22.520 you and all those things. And then you figure out 0:07:22.720 --> 0:07:27.160 how many hours you know, the average adult works over 0:07:27.200 --> 0:07:30.920 their life time. You know, they're working life between whatever, 0:07:31.000 --> 0:07:35.120 eighteen and sixty sixty five seventy, Like, that's a lot 0:07:35.200 --> 0:07:40.360 of waking hours to be miserable if you hate what you. 0:07:40.280 --> 0:07:44.760 Do absolutely And maybe that's why people are so interested in, 0:07:45.360 --> 0:07:47.120 you know, how many steps you take and what you 0:07:47.120 --> 0:07:50.400 have for breakfast and why you don't have lunch or 0:07:50.400 --> 0:07:53.040 what you have for dinner, because you are in a 0:07:53.080 --> 0:07:56.800 position of having something in your life that is work 0:07:56.840 --> 0:07:57.480 but not work. 0:07:58.640 --> 0:08:03.440 And I think likeascinated with the idea of everyone every listener, 0:08:03.960 --> 0:08:08.040 you Kelly Me, you know, Tiff and Melissa who work 0:08:08.120 --> 0:08:13.000 with us. I'm really interested in people finding out what's 0:08:13.000 --> 0:08:16.280 the best operating system for me. Yeah, you know, what's 0:08:16.320 --> 0:08:17.840 the best way to eat for me, what's the best 0:08:17.880 --> 0:08:19.640 way to live for me. What's the best way to 0:08:19.680 --> 0:08:22.440 work for me. What's the best way for me to 0:08:22.480 --> 0:08:26.120 manage my relationship with money? What's the best way for 0:08:26.200 --> 0:08:30.040 me to do relationships? Like I was talking to a 0:08:30.160 --> 0:08:31.880 dude the other day and he and his girl have 0:08:31.960 --> 0:08:38.880 been together. Lady been together for about ten years, and 0:08:39.240 --> 0:08:43.680 they like I see them sometimes separately, as in I 0:08:43.720 --> 0:08:46.800 bump into them, and you can tell they are in 0:08:46.880 --> 0:08:51.040 love as fuck right, they love each other, and he 0:08:51.120 --> 0:08:53.680 talks highly of her. He's fucking in love head over heels. 0:08:53.679 --> 0:08:56.120 She's in love with him head over heels. It's beautiful. 0:08:57.320 --> 0:09:00.480 But the funny thing is they don't live together, and 0:09:00.679 --> 0:09:03.319 they might stay at each other's house once or twice 0:09:03.360 --> 0:09:05.920 a week, but they have their own. Now, I'm not 0:09:05.960 --> 0:09:09.240 suggesting everyone should do this, but it's like they're well 0:09:09.240 --> 0:09:11.840 and truly locked in. It's not like, oh, they're kind 0:09:11.840 --> 0:09:14.240 of just seeing if it works out. No, they're absolutely 0:09:14.280 --> 0:09:18.840 a couple. And I said to I've asked both of 0:09:18.880 --> 0:09:23.680 them individually, like how did like, was this a conscious thing? 0:09:23.800 --> 0:09:26.079 Like did you? And they're like, you know what, it 0:09:26.280 --> 0:09:30.120 just it just works way better. Like we are head 0:09:30.160 --> 0:09:32.040 over heels in love. We don't want anyone else, We 0:09:32.080 --> 0:09:35.680 only want each other. But she said to me the 0:09:35.720 --> 0:09:38.800 other day or the other week, I actually get excited 0:09:38.840 --> 0:09:41.720 to see him when I haven't seen him for a 0:09:41.800 --> 0:09:46.439 day or two. Right, I get excited. He gets excited. 0:09:46.720 --> 0:09:50.160 We have date nights. It's fun. They've had like one 0:09:50.240 --> 0:09:55.040 blue in ten years. And I'm like, that is so atypical. 0:09:55.160 --> 0:09:57.920 But and again it's not a suggestion or a recommendation. 0:09:58.880 --> 0:10:02.040 But you think, wow, that's not something a lot of 0:10:02.040 --> 0:10:06.520 people would even think about. But when you also think 0:10:06.559 --> 0:10:10.360 about the fact that some people not all you know, 0:10:10.520 --> 0:10:13.960 five ten years in it's like groundhog Day and there 0:10:14.080 --> 0:10:18.360 doesn't seem like me who has spent a lot of 0:10:18.400 --> 0:10:23.080 time coaching, mentoring, teaching, working with people who are one 0:10:23.120 --> 0:10:26.680 of two in a relationship, and those people so often 0:10:26.720 --> 0:10:29.280 talk to me. Even when I was a trainer, I mean, 0:10:29.360 --> 0:10:31.600 the thing that my clients would talk to me about 0:10:31.600 --> 0:10:34.960 most was not their carbs, their micros, macros, they're training, 0:10:35.000 --> 0:10:39.840 their recovery. It was their relationships that was very interesting. 0:10:40.360 --> 0:10:42.679 I mean, they talk to me about everything, but if 0:10:42.720 --> 0:10:45.199 you said, what's at the top of the list, especially 0:10:45.280 --> 0:10:48.640 once you're three or four months into the relationship with 0:10:48.679 --> 0:10:53.560 a client, as in into the professional relationship, and you know, 0:10:53.600 --> 0:10:55.520 you've kind of got the food sortage, you've got the 0:10:55.559 --> 0:10:58.920 training sortage, you're in a routine, you've ticked all the boxes, 0:10:58.960 --> 0:11:01.280 and then now they're on the journey and we've got 0:11:01.320 --> 0:11:06.120 a pretty good operating model for everything. Invariably, what I 0:11:06.160 --> 0:11:10.920 would get, you know, told or spoken to about a lot, 0:11:11.480 --> 0:11:15.080 was the shitty relationship that they were in, and I'm like, 0:11:15.200 --> 0:11:20.280 oh wow, and so yeah, it's but anyway, it's it's 0:11:20.920 --> 0:11:22.960 that's why I don't think there's a best way to 0:11:23.000 --> 0:11:26.160 do almost anything. It's like, well, what's what's great for you? 0:11:26.240 --> 0:11:29.280 And that's you know, even with me and I never 0:11:29.640 --> 0:11:33.640 I never had a plan to be you know where 0:11:33.640 --> 0:11:37.600 I am and single, But I didn't also have a 0:11:37.800 --> 0:11:39.839 plan to go, well, by this age, I'm going to 0:11:39.880 --> 0:11:41.280 be married, I'm gonna have a wife, I'm gonna have 0:11:41.280 --> 0:11:42.920 two kids. By that age, i'm gonna have a couple 0:11:42.960 --> 0:11:48.640 of grants. Like, there wasn't an absolute plan and maybe 0:11:48.760 --> 0:11:50.480 my life would have taken a different turn, and it 0:11:50.480 --> 0:11:52.960 would have ended up very differently. But this is just 0:11:53.360 --> 0:11:57.040 how it kind of ended up. And while I'm not saying, 0:11:58.360 --> 0:11:59.679 you know, the way that I live is the way 0:11:59.720 --> 0:12:02.720 that anybody should live at all. But the amount of 0:12:02.720 --> 0:12:09.959 people who like look at me with pity, like they're like, oh. 0:12:09.840 --> 0:12:12.079 Poor you, what a shit life you've got? 0:12:12.120 --> 0:12:14.960 Hey, yeah, poor you. You're sixty one and you don't 0:12:15.000 --> 0:12:18.080 have anyone somebody. I mean, I've had more than a 0:12:18.080 --> 0:12:20.559 few people. And look, they may be right, who knows, 0:12:21.320 --> 0:12:24.120 I've had more than a few people. Tell me you're 0:12:24.120 --> 0:12:26.680 going to die lonely and miserable. I'm like, oh, well, 0:12:26.720 --> 0:12:30.600 thanks for the fucking thanks for the pep talk, you know. 0:12:32.080 --> 0:12:37.439 And it's like somebody said to me recently, and we'll 0:12:37.440 --> 0:12:39.600 get off this and we'll get onto your question. Sorry 0:12:39.600 --> 0:12:41.640 for babbling for a bloke with a block, dear fuck, 0:12:41.640 --> 0:12:46.400 I'm talking a lot. Somebody said to me, what have 0:12:46.440 --> 0:12:48.000 you got against relationships? 0:12:48.440 --> 0:12:48.600 Oh? 0:12:48.600 --> 0:12:51.600 Wow, Like I've never in my life said that or 0:12:51.600 --> 0:12:56.520 intimated that, or you know, I'm like, I have well, nothing. 0:12:56.679 --> 0:12:58.560 My parents have been in a pretty good one for 0:12:58.800 --> 0:13:03.880 sixty three years, and you know, most of my friends 0:13:03.920 --> 0:13:06.840 my training partner is in a long term you know, 0:13:06.920 --> 0:13:10.920 my best friends. And it's so funny they assume because 0:13:11.640 --> 0:13:15.040 I don't have a partner, that I'm anti relationship. 0:13:16.240 --> 0:13:18.480 Yeah. And I think there's also those people that assume 0:13:18.559 --> 0:13:22.480 that because you don't have a partner, that you don't 0:13:22.480 --> 0:13:26.760 have intimate relationships with other people, assuming that intimacy is 0:13:26.760 --> 0:13:28.160 based purely on romance. 0:13:28.760 --> 0:13:30.880 Yeah, so true, so true. 0:13:32.080 --> 0:13:34.640 I get the comment of you know, well, you don't 0:13:34.640 --> 0:13:36.360 have kids, so who's going to look after you when 0:13:36.400 --> 0:13:40.640 you're old? Yeah, so I'm just bribing my niece to 0:13:40.679 --> 0:13:42.640 make sure she's around when I'm old. 0:13:43.960 --> 0:13:46.680 Yeah. I think that's a good idea. I think bribing 0:13:47.440 --> 0:13:52.360 nieces and nephews, keeping them cashed up, absolutely, making sure 0:13:52.400 --> 0:13:56.360 you're the favorite. All right, So we got five questions 0:13:56.400 --> 0:14:02.920 to go. We do, and thank you for installment one 0:14:02.960 --> 0:14:06.960 and two. Let's see how we go. Let's see what 0:14:07.000 --> 0:14:07.400 you got. 0:14:09.320 --> 0:14:12.599 So this is a question that I actually sent to 0:14:12.640 --> 0:14:15.440 you in a message, and you said that you would 0:14:15.920 --> 0:14:17.600 tell me when you saw me, And so now that 0:14:17.600 --> 0:14:20.200 you're looking at me, I'm going to ask you, yea, 0:14:21.040 --> 0:14:25.720 when did you stop equating your physicality with contentment or happiness? 0:14:26.120 --> 0:14:30.440 Mm, So that is a really interesting question. I've spoken 0:14:30.480 --> 0:14:32.360 a lot. You know. What was funny. I was at 0:14:32.360 --> 0:14:38.240 the gym tonight. This is totally coincidental, and a guy 0:14:38.360 --> 0:14:40.400 used to work for me. His name is Nigel Chamberlain, 0:14:41.400 --> 0:14:44.520 Jambo Nige. You would have sent him. He's a bald, 0:14:44.560 --> 0:14:48.400 good looking dude, six', three a o's couple of three 0:14:48.480 --> 0:14:55.240 child care. Centers, anyway he was there tonight and we 0:14:55.240 --> 0:14:59.080 were just, chatting and somebody else was there and they, 0:14:59.160 --> 0:15:03.600 SAID i heard you used to Be they didn't say, 0:15:03.640 --> 0:15:06.200 fat but they were, saying you, know like not in 0:15:06.240 --> 0:15:09.680 the shape you're in. Now AND i, said, well ask 0:15:09.800 --> 0:15:15.080 this bloke Because i've spoken before about being the fat 0:15:15.120 --> 0:15:18.440 gym owner and you, know like knowing what to do 0:15:18.520 --> 0:15:21.160 but not doing WHAT i know and telling and, Anyway 0:15:21.240 --> 0:15:24.920 niger was talking about WHEN i first met. You SO 0:15:25.080 --> 0:15:28.120 i was quite a high profile. TRAINER i owned multiple 0:15:28.160 --> 0:15:31.520 gyms at that, STAGE i owned. THREE i was writing 0:15:31.560 --> 0:15:34.480 for The Herald sun In, melbourne the. NEWSPAPER i was 0:15:34.520 --> 0:15:38.160 writing for. MAGAZINES i was working with elite athletes AND 0:15:38.240 --> 0:15:40.480 i was very strong AND i had lots of, muscle 0:15:40.840 --> 0:15:43.080 BUT i was also out of, shape LIKE i HAD 0:15:44.320 --> 0:15:48.400 i had lots of excess body, fat and we were 0:15:48.440 --> 0:15:53.080 just talking about, that and, Like i've always had this, tempestuous, 0:15:53.160 --> 0:15:59.120 tumultuous on, again off, again fucking love hate relationship with 0:15:59.320 --> 0:16:04.040 food and myself and my you, know my body image 0:16:04.040 --> 0:16:07.360 and body. Dysmorphia even WHEN i was in good, SHAPE 0:16:07.360 --> 0:16:10.560 i THOUGHT i. WASN'T i, know this sounds, pathetic and 0:16:10.600 --> 0:16:13.880 some people are, like oh my, GOD i get. IT 0:16:13.960 --> 0:16:18.560 i get. It BUT i, remember you, know looking at 0:16:18.600 --> 0:16:22.320 myself WHEN i was in like really good, shape WHEN 0:16:22.320 --> 0:16:25.640 i was, younger and THINKING i looked like. Shit and 0:16:26.360 --> 0:16:29.360 you know how so many people do. That you, know 0:16:29.600 --> 0:16:32.120 generally it's more women than, men but it also can 0:16:32.160 --> 0:16:37.600 be men, too. Obviously BUT i think for a long, 0:16:37.640 --> 0:16:42.880 time because BECAUSE i grew, up you, know being the 0:16:42.920 --> 0:16:45.400 fattest kid and all of that, STUFF i really sought 0:16:45.480 --> 0:16:50.160 approval from not being the fat. Kid AND i saw 0:16:50.800 --> 0:16:53.800 the consequence of me being the fat kid was not 0:16:53.920 --> 0:16:57.520 having a, girlfriend not belonging to, groups not being socially, 0:16:57.600 --> 0:17:04.280 connected not being highly regard, arded and so there were you, 0:17:04.320 --> 0:17:07.399 know in my. Mind, anyway by the, way nobody was 0:17:07.440 --> 0:17:10.800 actually really horrible to, me, RIGHT i, MEAN i did 0:17:10.880 --> 0:17:13.879 get picked glass for sporting. Teams but that's literally BECAUSE 0:17:13.920 --> 0:17:17.120 i was morbidly, obese AND i would not have been much, help, 0:17:17.200 --> 0:17:22.400 Right but in my mind there are always these, psychological, 0:17:22.400 --> 0:17:27.640 emotional and sociological, consequences all of these things THAT i equated, With, 0:17:27.800 --> 0:17:30.560 well this bad shit is happening because of HOW i. 0:17:30.640 --> 0:17:33.800 Look this bad shit is happening Because i'm. Fat this 0:17:33.960 --> 0:17:36.840 bad shit is happening because you, know my name is 0:17:36.920 --> 0:17:41.600 Literally jumbo at, school, Right so my fat body became my. 0:17:41.760 --> 0:17:46.600 Name and THEN i got in. Shape now this is 0:17:46.640 --> 0:17:48.800 this happens with a lot of. People Call SO i 0:17:48.800 --> 0:17:52.359 got in, shape and then all of a, sudden my 0:17:52.520 --> 0:17:55.840 social life opened. Up all of a. SUDDEN i got treated, 0:17:55.880 --> 0:17:59.199 better all of a. SUDDEN i wasn't. EXCLUDED i was 0:17:59.320 --> 0:18:02.440 included all of a, sudden you. Know and by the, 0:18:02.480 --> 0:18:06.840 way it didn't happen in three, minutes BUT i went 0:18:06.880 --> 0:18:08.720 from not being able to jog around the block to 0:18:08.840 --> 0:18:11.520 being one of the fittest kids in the school BECAUSE 0:18:11.520 --> 0:18:14.240 i trained like a. Maniac SO i got very, fit very, 0:18:14.240 --> 0:18:19.440 strong you, know and for somebody with limited athletic, ABILITY 0:18:19.880 --> 0:18:22.800 i became an okay. Athlete and then all of a, 0:18:22.880 --> 0:18:25.280 SUDDEN i was playing. FOOTBALL i was playing in the. 0:18:25.359 --> 0:18:29.320 SENIORS i was, playing you, know OR i was being 0:18:29.359 --> 0:18:32.160 picked in the WHATEVER i was in under, fourteen under sixteen. 0:18:32.200 --> 0:18:34.840 TEAMS i was being picked in the TEAM i wasn't you. 0:18:34.840 --> 0:18:39.320 Know and all of these great things in my mind 0:18:39.560 --> 0:18:43.639 happened in these teen. Years and so you have this 0:18:43.760 --> 0:18:46.840 correlation where you, go, oh WHEN i look like, that 0:18:47.080 --> 0:18:50.000 all these bad things. Happen WHEN i look like, this 0:18:50.200 --> 0:18:54.719 all these good things. Happen and so very MUCH i. 0:18:55.080 --> 0:18:59.760 Was my identity and my body were very much, intertwined 0:19:00.720 --> 0:19:03.919 AND i equated to the BETTER i, looked whatever that, 0:19:04.000 --> 0:19:07.119 meant the BETTER i get, treated the more LOVED i, 0:19:07.160 --> 0:19:09.359 am the more VALUED i, am the more POPULAR i, 0:19:09.400 --> 0:19:12.520 am the more DESIRED i, am the more all of these, 0:19:12.520 --> 0:19:14.800 things WHICH i know all come out of fear and 0:19:14.840 --> 0:19:18.919 insecurity and all of that. Stuff but, SORRY i know 0:19:19.000 --> 0:19:19.760 this is a very long. 0:19:19.840 --> 0:19:21.800 Answer it's good. 0:19:22.880 --> 0:19:27.200 For me That i'm going to. SAY i don't struggle 0:19:27.200 --> 0:19:32.280 with it. Today But i'm still going to, say while 0:19:32.440 --> 0:19:41.280 my priority is my health and my health, span, lifespan 0:19:42.160 --> 0:19:46.480 my immune, system my level of, function cutovascular, health physical, health, 0:19:46.520 --> 0:19:50.240 bundensity muscular, health all of those, things they're my. Priorities 0:19:51.000 --> 0:19:54.439 BUT i still care sometimes too much about HOW i. 0:19:54.480 --> 0:19:57.800 Look If i'm being, HONEST i don't want to say, that, 0:19:57.960 --> 0:20:03.000 Right but nothing like WHAT i used To. Like i'm 0:20:03.000 --> 0:20:05.360 well aware that you, Know i'm a sixty year Old 0:20:05.359 --> 0:20:08.320 blokou's in not bad. Shape you, KNOW i get. That 0:20:10.400 --> 0:20:15.440 But i'm way more interested In like that used to 0:20:15.480 --> 0:20:17.840 be my, Priority but these, Days i'm way more interested 0:20:17.840 --> 0:20:21.119 in training my brain than my, mind my brain than my. 0:20:21.200 --> 0:20:24.800 Body i'm more interested, in way more interested in WHO 0:20:24.800 --> 0:20:26.840 i am as a person rather than HOW i look 0:20:26.880 --> 0:20:34.359 as a. Person, yeah but it's really only WHEN i 0:20:34.440 --> 0:20:37.159 got through. THAT i don't THINK i got through that real, manic, 0:20:37.280 --> 0:20:41.960 obsessive almost, addictive BECAUSE i think people who are really 0:20:42.000 --> 0:20:48.080 down the rabbit hole with eating disorders and body dysmorphia 0:20:48.359 --> 0:20:51.560 and you, know that whole kind of, irrational emotional kind 0:20:51.600 --> 0:20:56.600 of behavior that goes on around, food hidden, behaviors, lying you, 0:20:56.640 --> 0:20:58.240 know all that stuff THAT i, did all of. That 0:21:00.119 --> 0:21:04.400 it's very similar to the behavior and the thinking of 0:21:05.119 --> 0:21:09.479 people who struggle with. Addiction because you're lying to yourself and. 0:21:09.520 --> 0:21:12.680 Others you're pretending that you're not doing all this shit 0:21:12.760 --> 0:21:16.840 that you're. Doing and when people are, watching you kind 0:21:16.840 --> 0:21:19.639 of behave a certain way when people are not, watching you. 0:21:19.680 --> 0:21:22.639 Know so for, ME i don't THINK i got through that, 0:21:23.000 --> 0:21:26.560 dark kind of, shitty addictive period TILL i was about thirty. 0:21:26.600 --> 0:21:29.879 Five SO i would Say i've, been you, know somewhere 0:21:29.920 --> 0:21:32.680 in the ballpark of much healthier and much more logical 0:21:32.720 --> 0:21:36.159 and reasonable for the last twenty five years or. So 0:21:36.359 --> 0:21:39.160 but you, KNOW i think all of us still NEED 0:21:39.760 --> 0:21:43.320 i don't Reckon there's many people THAT i know that 0:21:43.520 --> 0:21:48.360 at some stage are not a bit irrational about their, 0:21:48.359 --> 0:21:53.160 body even people that are super, smart you, know super. 0:21:53.200 --> 0:21:58.320 Qualified the amount of you, know men and women THAT 0:21:58.520 --> 0:22:02.520 i know That i've worked with who have an, obsessive 0:22:02.600 --> 0:22:08.000 unhealthy preoccupation with one their appearance and to what they 0:22:08.119 --> 0:22:12.560 think people think of their, appearance it's a huge number of. 0:22:12.560 --> 0:22:17.000 People huge put my hand up for, that, Absolutely and 0:22:17.040 --> 0:22:19.960 that's WHY i asked you that, question because it was 0:22:20.080 --> 0:22:24.320 something that was definitely going through my mind at the, 0:22:24.359 --> 0:22:28.840 time and that came from a journey of losing a 0:22:28.880 --> 0:22:31.720 fair bit of weight and then getting into the their 0:22:31.720 --> 0:22:34.880 headspace of oh my, GOD i can't let that go back. 0:22:34.920 --> 0:22:40.040 On mainly FROM i would say eighty percent from a health, 0:22:40.080 --> 0:22:45.560 perspective and then absolutely, honest honestly twenty percent from A 0:22:46.040 --> 0:22:48.320 i love fitting into all of the clothes THAT i 0:22:48.440 --> 0:22:50.240 really enjoy fitting. 0:22:50.240 --> 0:22:53.840 Into, now of, course how much weight do you will? 0:22:53.920 --> 0:22:55.119 Take did you lose. 0:22:56.600 --> 0:22:56.760 Ten? 0:22:56.840 --> 0:23:00.640 Kilos, yeah and you're not you're not a so that's 0:23:00.680 --> 0:23:04.080 quite like you're reasonably with love and kindness and. Respect 0:23:04.080 --> 0:23:07.080 you're kind of, little so that's quite a lot of. Weight. 0:23:07.560 --> 0:23:07.800 Yeah. 0:23:08.240 --> 0:23:11.159 Yeah but here's here's the other. Thing think about, THIS. 0:23:11.320 --> 0:23:15.879 Celp so we can simultaneously know two. Things we can know, that, 0:23:16.000 --> 0:23:19.520 hey all this Bullshit i'm doing with food and the 0:23:19.640 --> 0:23:23.679 successive exercise and the obsession with you, know buying a 0:23:23.720 --> 0:23:28.080 million clothes and all of, that we can simultaneously know 0:23:28.240 --> 0:23:32.240