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Speaker 1: H approach a production. For the record. I'm done trying

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Speaker 1: to make y'all comfortable for the record. You ain't trying

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Speaker 1: to grow downy stuff for your for the record, laugh

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Speaker 1: on me going all the way for the record. Ain't

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Speaker 1: trying to link, No, trying to waste stop.

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Speaker 2: For the record, for the record, for the for the record,

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Speaker 2: for the.

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Speaker 1: Right, for the ready record, for the record. I'm done

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Speaker 1: trying to make y'all comfortable.

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Speaker 3: Right, we are back, guys. I'm gonna be really honest.

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Speaker 3: It's been a long time doing this. Over four and

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Speaker 3: a half years. We are hitting very close to our

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Speaker 3: six million downloads, and by the end of this season,

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Speaker 3: I do expect to hit that figure. And it has

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Speaker 3: been a journey. It's been a journey of highs lows.

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Speaker 3: It's been a journey of some tough, tough times that

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Speaker 3: I've had to actually sit back and really reassess where

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Speaker 3: I wanted to be with what I produce, my guests,

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Speaker 3: and what I deliver. Thanks to you and to everybody

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Speaker 3: who has commented and supported, we are going to continue

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Speaker 3: to go ahead because we know that these stories are

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Speaker 3: having a massive impact in our communities and in your life.

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Speaker 3: From me, personally, thank you to you, Thank you to

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Speaker 3: Sideway Surf who has supported me over the years. We

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Speaker 3: at the moment are open to option with another sponsorship,

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Speaker 3: so we'll talk further about that as we move forward

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Speaker 3: in this season. But I do want to say a

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Speaker 3: massive thank you to Sideways Surf and remember that if

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Speaker 3: you want to support Clinking Corporated, we have our positive

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Speaker 3: wellness apparel that is available at all Sideways Surf stores

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Speaker 3: on the whole of the East Coast of Australia. Now,

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Speaker 3: without further ado, this guest is someone who truly is

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Speaker 3: inspiring to me. I have followed his journey for some

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Speaker 3: time and it's not something that I like to do.

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Speaker 3: Is I guess stalk or follow our guest too much?

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Speaker 3: But Matt is somebody that I can really relate to

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Speaker 3: and I do look up to as a dad, as

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Speaker 3: a bit of a mentor, to be honest, and I've

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Speaker 3: been blessed to have this wonderful man to be here

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Speaker 3: today with me, to join me in Season nineteen opening.

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Speaker 3: Matt mate, wow, A little bit starstruck as we started

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Speaker 3: in the beginning.

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Speaker 4: I had to get it off my chest.

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Speaker 3: And yes, no, I didn't just introduce you by your

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Speaker 3: full last name, because I don't want to fuck up.

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Speaker 3: But anyway, I'm a little bit nervous. I'm pretty good

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Speaker 3: used but steineweight Matt steinweight. There we go now and

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Speaker 3: then mate, Honestly, without pissing in your pocket, you are

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Speaker 3: truly an amazing man. The way you live your life,

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Speaker 3: the way you deliver just you. There's there's no sort

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Speaker 3: of bullshit.

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Speaker 4: You know.

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Speaker 3: You structure your life in a way that is just

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Speaker 3: so so amazingly healthy. It's successful. And I know that

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Speaker 3: there's the highs and the lows, the ups and the downs.

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Speaker 3: I mean, that is life. But the way you embrace

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Speaker 3: it through your hardships and your highs and your winds

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Speaker 3: and just sharing your story with people you know like

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Speaker 3: you're not. I know that you have a big platform,

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Speaker 3: but you're not someone I look at as another influencer.

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Speaker 3: You're a man who's living and produces daily this normality

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Speaker 3: of life, what life should be in wholesomeness. It hasn't

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Speaker 3: always been in wholesome and you most definitely have experienced

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Speaker 3: the highs, the lows, hit rock bottom and the consistency

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Speaker 3: you show off the back of where it will begin

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Speaker 3: is phenomenal today, I'd love to introduce your story here

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Speaker 3: on the clink and it's something that I'm very honored

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Speaker 3: to be able to deliver, so thank you. And for

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Speaker 3: those that don't know Matt, would you like to introduce

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Speaker 3: yourself and tell the people who you are.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, Well, I live on the central Coast in New

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Speaker 5: South Wales and then I'm a real estate agent basically.

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Speaker 5: So I have seven kids. I've been married three times.

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Speaker 5: I was, you know, with my first wife for five years,

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Speaker 5: next one sixteen years, and Tara I've been with eight.

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Speaker 5: So you know, I'm slow learner. But I've got four

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Speaker 5: kids to the first wife, two kids to the second wife,

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Speaker 5: and one girl who's two now to Tara. I've been

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Speaker 5: in real estate almost thirty years now. Wow, it's almost

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Speaker 5: like twenty eight years or something. And before I got

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Speaker 5: into real estate, I was like a criminal, I guess

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Speaker 5: you'd say. But back then it was like I used

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Speaker 5: to be a bouncer on Oxtord Street and I just

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Speaker 5: got in that world, like I didn't set out to

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Speaker 5: be like that. So I just left Maruba Beach and

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Speaker 5: went partying one day when I was like seventeen and

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Speaker 5: never came back to the beach. I just stayed in

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Speaker 5: there and basically just partied. I loved it. It was good.

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Speaker 5: I started training at City Gym a long time ago.

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Speaker 5: It was like the first twenty four hour gym. They

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Speaker 5: didn't exist back then, but that was twenty four hours

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Speaker 5: and it was just like the scene. And I walked

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Speaker 5: in one day and the gay scene was like on

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Speaker 5: Oxford Street and I was his little surfer kid and

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Speaker 5: I walked in the gym with this gay guy friend

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Speaker 5: of mine, Steven Scott. He has come to the gym

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Speaker 5: and I'm like, okay, because I used to train at

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Speaker 5: the Surf Club. Every old rusty weights a bit and

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Speaker 5: I always had like an okay body. And then I

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Speaker 5: walked in as like massive guys and it was like

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Speaker 5: they were all in hot pants and hat. It was

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Speaker 5: hat and I'm talking pumping hard and I was such

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Speaker 5: a Steve.

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Speaker 4: Sounds like black Market on a Thursday night.

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Speaker 3: Exactly, the old hell Fire exactly, little leather pants.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, totally yeah. And I said to stay have them.

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Speaker 5: They're so big, and he goes, oh, they take steroids.

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Speaker 5: And I was like, what's steroids? So what do you

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Speaker 5: want some? And I was like yeah, I think so

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Speaker 5: you guys, we'll give me four in a bucks. So

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Speaker 5: I gave him for in the bucks and then you

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Speaker 5: got some is it and androl at the time or

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Speaker 5: Napple and I can't remember any like a couple of

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Speaker 5: bottles and a couple of injectable things, and off I went.

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Speaker 5: And I just went down that path. And then the

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Speaker 5: more I was in that scene, I could see the

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Speaker 5: bigger the people were and the I don't know scary

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Speaker 5: as the right word, but the more intimidating the word.

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Speaker 5: It was like a currency. So I was like, oh,

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Speaker 5: I just want to be the biggest and I want

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Speaker 5: to be the scariest and all this stuff. And you know,

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Speaker 5: I went down that path and then just got involved

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Speaker 5: deeper and deeper and deeper.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, you talk about the depths of involvement.

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Speaker 3: You know, I'm coming up to fifty myself, spring chicken

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Speaker 3: not not looking as good as yourself, though, I must say,

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Speaker 3: I was.

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Speaker 5: Like, I'm fifty three, so I was like, I was

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Speaker 5: like forties.

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Speaker 4: Well, thank you, I appreciate that, and I'll take that

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Speaker 4: as a.

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Speaker 5: Little win for the bame market. Actually thought you weren't

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Speaker 5: old enough to know blade market.

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Speaker 3: Well, I'm just about to say to you that whole

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Speaker 3: space around Oxford Street we used to do DCMS can

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Speaker 3: sellers and you know, Exchange Hotel. That was the original bit.

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Speaker 3: Oh wow, yeah, now we're talking, so you know. And

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Speaker 3: then even Taxi Club that was, you know, a cool

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Speaker 3: place to be back in the day. And it was

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Speaker 3: just a different a different world. If you didn't live

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Speaker 3: it and didn't have that, I guess, opportunity to enjoy

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Speaker 3: what it was all about, you missed out on an

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Speaker 3: era and a great era to be had, I think

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Speaker 3: for all of us, you know, the talking realistic here

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Speaker 3: when the you know, the real sort of pills started

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Speaker 3: hitting the streets, the proper MDMA Calais splits and the

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Speaker 3: baby calas and the little bayzes, little fifty dollars bays

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Speaker 3: tablets you've taken.

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Speaker 4: It's dance your ass off all night.

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Speaker 3: And then the one eight hundred numbers for the rave scene,

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Speaker 3: and you know, everyone to be running too Oxford Street

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Speaker 3: to the telephones and taxi ranks lined up. Next minute, boom,

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Speaker 3: everyone's gone and just disappeared. You just can't explain that

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Speaker 3: to someone today, can you.

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Speaker 5: And there was like a club for every night apart

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Speaker 5: from Wednesday, So it was like Wednesday was sleeping day.

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Speaker 4: Wednesday was sleeping day.

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Speaker 3: Talking about sleeping and if I can touch on whilst

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Speaker 3: we're in this part of your journey with us today,

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Speaker 3: you went through quite an interesting period of drug use, speed,

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Speaker 3: lack of sleep or was something that you sort of

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Speaker 3: got yourself involved in. And obviously, and I'll let you

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Speaker 3: tell the story, it become a much bigger problem for

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Speaker 3: you in the earlier years.

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Speaker 5: Oh yeah, I just became a full blown drug IC's

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Speaker 5: not even in the end, just during it, Like I

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Speaker 5: just I just went from speed, then pills and then

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Speaker 5: coke was around, but not I didn't really focus on

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Speaker 5: much made speed because you just want to go for

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Speaker 5: a correct but then it turns to the needle. So

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Speaker 5: then I started injecting everything, and then then coke crept in.

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Speaker 5: I hooked up with this girl one time and she goes,

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Speaker 5: do you want to blast some coke? And I was like,

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Speaker 5: I didn't really take much coke and plus is like

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Speaker 5: expensive at the time as well, so like it just

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Speaker 5: didn't make sense, like you good buye I don't know,

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Speaker 5: an eight ball of speed for LTE and how much

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Speaker 5: it was like say two hundred bucks, three und the

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Speaker 5: buck or whatever it was.

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Speaker 4: But you know, bluggy glucose.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, it just didn't make sense to me. But she goes,

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Speaker 5: you want to blast some coke and we're at home

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Speaker 5: and she goes, you'll never forget the feeling. I was like, yeah, sure,

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Speaker 5: and then so I did, and I can tell you gee,

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Speaker 5: I was hooked.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, and experience that moment, It's like a helicopter just

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Speaker 3: takes off inside your head and a rush of just

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Speaker 3: euphoria that you just can't explain, and I don't think. Look,

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Speaker 3: we very open here on the Clink, and anybody whom

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Speaker 3: is new, please, if you are triggered by any of

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Speaker 3: our conversations, do reach out and talk to someone. It's

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Speaker 3: imperative if you're in recovery or if there's something that

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Speaker 3: you know may be triggering to you, do take care.

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Speaker 3: But the whole part of what we deliver here is

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Speaker 3: the trueeness of somebody's journey that then inspires people that

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Speaker 3: there are better ways and they're not alone. And Matt, Wow,

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Speaker 3: I mean opening our conversation today with some pretty deep,

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Speaker 3: dark moments.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I'm trying to accelerate it because it's very long story.

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Speaker 5: I don't accelerate the whole thing because then we'll get

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Speaker 5: into the other stuff definitely. But then you know sliding

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Speaker 5: door moments in life brand that I look at now,

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Speaker 5: I can't tell you what's happened, but like how much

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Speaker 5: of the different things that happened along the way. But

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Speaker 5: I ended up working for these guys, so I don't

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Speaker 5: even know call it working. I just did things for them.

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Speaker 5: And then they were like pretty high up people and

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Speaker 5: in that whole scene, and they sent me to Terrible

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Speaker 5: one night, and like by this time, I was pretty

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Speaker 5: bad drug addict. I was just a walking animal. Basically

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Speaker 5: I would do anything.

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Speaker 4: And then was this whilst also using steroids as well.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, I didn't. So I was like one hundred

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Speaker 5: and twenty eight kilos one hundred and thirty hundred and

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Speaker 5: twenty five kilos, and I was like by this time,

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Speaker 5: I developed a lot of connections and I was a

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Speaker 5: loose animal, yeah, and just I didn't care about anything anyway.

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Speaker 5: I ended up like really scraping around because I didn't

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Speaker 5: realize I was getting hotter and hotter as well. And

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Speaker 5: then a friend of mine, bouncer with DCM, pulled me

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Speaker 5: aside one day and said, mate, you're real hot. You've

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Speaker 5: got to go for a while. And I was like, yeah,

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Speaker 5: I just didn't see it. And then dealing drugs, running

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Speaker 5: drugs around everywhere, like as in different states and things,

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Speaker 5: and then I just didn't listen. And then people started

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Speaker 5: to move away from me a lot, and I started

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Speaker 5: to get because I had like a good, well, I

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Speaker 5: don't know if you call a good reputation. I was

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Speaker 5: trustworthy in that scene, you know, I would never do

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Speaker 5: nothing to anyone that I was connected to. And then

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Speaker 5: it just got real weird. Because I was so hot,

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Speaker 5: people started not trust me. Then I started to do

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Speaker 5: other things just to get money and stuff, and I

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Speaker 5: ended up I got a call one night for some

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Speaker 5: guys who you know on Cananbury Road. They have three

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Speaker 5: sections like eleven Knees or Islanders and yes aging or something.

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Speaker 5: They own parts of it and they have their prostitutes

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Speaker 5: on there. And I go call and they said, can

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Speaker 5: you mind, We've got a new girl to work on

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Speaker 5: Canoby Road. Can you be a minder for her? So

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Speaker 5: no one takes that, and I said yeah sure. So

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Speaker 5: I started in all that scene, which I wasn't really

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Speaker 5: involved in that much. That was more like the cross

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Speaker 5: scene sort of thing. And then those people were opening

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Speaker 5: another brussel, so I was minding her for a while.

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Speaker 5: And then those people were opening another brussel and they said,

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Speaker 5: can you go to Terrigul and look for some new girls.

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Speaker 5: Go to the nightclub up there. We'll hook you up

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Speaker 5: with the bikers up there and whoever else. And that

250
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Speaker 5: one night changed my entire life. I went up there

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Speaker 5: and I met with the people up there in the club,

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Speaker 5: met the guys. This guy came over, It makes me

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Speaker 5: look more. I'm six foot four almost, and then.

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Speaker 4: He are you seriously nearly six foot four?

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Speaker 5: Yeah? Wow, you make me look small. And I was like, hey,

256
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Speaker 5: hey go He goes, hey, I'm Dina. We just hit

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Speaker 5: it off a bit. And then this other girl comes

258
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Speaker 5: over that night, friend of Dina, has nothing to do

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Speaker 5: with all this, and it was her eighteenth birthday and

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Speaker 5: her name was Karina. And then I goes, hey, this

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Speaker 5: is Karena. I was off my head, like, so off

262
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Speaker 5: my head is not funny, and I was like hey,

263
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Speaker 5: and I thought she's pretty hot. So at the end

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Speaker 5: of the night, I said, oh, can I have your number?

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Speaker 5: Not for the whole thing. I didn't even do anything

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Speaker 5: there was I supposed to say to people, do you

267
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Speaker 5: want to work in the brothel. I don't know what

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Speaker 5: I was doing there anyway, so that's what I mean.

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Speaker 5: I just didn't I was just doing anything. And then

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Speaker 5: I said, can I have your number? Anyway? Fortunately she

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Speaker 5: gave it to me. Fortunately, but it was an eighteenth birthday.

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Speaker 5: She was a Mormon, never been to a nightclub before

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Speaker 5: meets me goes to the front. I didn't know this

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Speaker 5: till weeks later, but when she went to write down

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Speaker 5: a number, the bouncer grabs her and said, are you

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Speaker 5: giving that guy your number? And she said yeah. He said,

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Speaker 5: whatever you do, don't please don't and don't say I

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Speaker 5: said anything, because he's a sort of guy that makes

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Speaker 5: people disappear. I'm so glad she didn't listen. She gave

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Speaker 5: me her number. I went to Sydney. Everything fell apart

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Speaker 5: in such a big way I can't even explain it.

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Speaker 5: I ended up living in this abandoned building and camperdown

283
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Speaker 5: and I used to climb in and out of the window.

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Speaker 5: No one would come near me. No drugs. I couldn't

285
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Speaker 5: get any drugs because no one would touch me.

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Speaker 3: So you basically have gone from being sort of in

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Speaker 3: the middle of the mix to completely just left, hind

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Speaker 3: cut off everywhere.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, so bad. And then like this is really accelerated story,

290
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Speaker 5: but it was really bad. And then I was doing

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Speaker 5: anything to try to keep the drugs going, just myself

292
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Speaker 5: taking them. And then about six months after that could

293
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Speaker 5: have been ten months, I was under surveillance for I

294
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Speaker 5: Reckon about a year and a half. I Reckon maybe

295
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Speaker 5: a bit more. And then it was just like ramping

296
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Speaker 5: up and cops were doing funny things. I knocking on

297
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Speaker 5: doors pretending they were different people. Like the door I

298
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Speaker 5: was squatting in one night, the guy knocks on the door.

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Speaker 5: I was in there injecting drugs. No one's in there,

300
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Speaker 5: nothing in there, no furniture, no nothing, just me. And

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Speaker 5: he knocks on the door and he's goes, oh, mate,

302
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Speaker 5: do you know where the hospital is around here? Like this,

303
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Speaker 5: pretending to be drunk.

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Speaker 3: And I was like, and you're in Camperdown anyway, which

305
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Speaker 3: is pretty obvious.

306
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Speaker 4: Where the hospital is on Paramount Road.

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Speaker 5: Well, I didn't know where it was because I was

308
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Speaker 5: so used to just Oxford Street. I just ended up

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Speaker 5: getting in this place because my mate rented this place

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Speaker 5: that was attached to a workshop and they all moved

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Speaker 5: out and I just kept going there and then he goes,

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Speaker 5: I said, no, I don't know what you t tolkd meou,

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Speaker 5: I don't know what the hospital is. And I was

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Speaker 5: just wired as and he's like, he looks at me

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Speaker 5: and goes, we know what you're doing. We are right

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Speaker 5: onto you. And I'm like, it wasn't drunk, it's just

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Speaker 5: pretending we know what you're doing. Anyway. I rang Dino

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Speaker 5: about three or four months after that thing because I

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Speaker 5: was going mad, literally, and I said to Dna, can

320
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Speaker 5: you come pick me up? I'm going to be dead

321
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Speaker 5: or in jail any day because I had warrants out

322
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Speaker 5: from Rorest that had all different things happening. I owe

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Speaker 5: people money. I say to people that I've got a

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Speaker 5: couple of contracts taken out my life. People don't believe me.

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Speaker 5: Like when I did the mut wresting, some people write, oh,

326
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Speaker 5: that's bull crap, blah blah blah. I own quite a

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Speaker 5: bit of money because I took a whole lot of

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Speaker 5: drugs down to Melbourne while I was pretty high, and

329
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Speaker 5: the people I took them down to got a call

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Speaker 5: from someone who said, get that guy out of here.

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Speaker 5: You guys are all going to go down, they told me,

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Speaker 5: and they were all good friends of mine. I just

333
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Speaker 5: left and I left all that and I couldn't pay back.

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Speaker 5: So those people were after me.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, And let's be honest, Melbourne's very well known for

336
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Speaker 3: its history, especially network, and obviously if you're going to Melbourne,

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Speaker 3: it's not for a agree April.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, So when't I say that. I just had a

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Speaker 5: couple of people that were pretty focused on getting me.

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Speaker 5: So it wasn't like a contract where people just say,

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Speaker 5: you know, there's contract out on you and I'm like, oh,

342
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Speaker 5: what am I going to do about it? So anyway,

343
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Speaker 5: Dino comes down, picks me up, takes me back to

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Speaker 5: his parents' house, puts me at the back of his parents'

345
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Speaker 5: house in this little room, and I stayed there for

346
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Speaker 5: nine months, and I just I was no good. I

347
00:17:07,281 --> 00:17:09,080
Speaker 5: was in a bit of a psychiasis and I just

348
00:17:09,160 --> 00:17:12,880
Speaker 5: drew stick figure people on paper every day for nine months.

349
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Speaker 5: And I called it Duncan and he had a little

350
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Speaker 5: helmet on and I said to Dina, Duncan's going to

351
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Speaker 5: be the biggest thing ever, mate, if I wasn't for Dina,

352
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Speaker 5: I would be dead. And he put me out there

353
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Speaker 5: and he used to make me lunch and like toast

354
00:17:26,600 --> 00:17:30,360
Speaker 5: the sandwiches and things. I was still seeing Karina by

355
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Speaker 5: this point, and after about nine months of doing that,

356
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Speaker 5: I was going a bit crazy. And it was just

357
00:17:35,080 --> 00:17:38,041
Speaker 5: a box, this little box outside his parents' house. I thought,

358
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Speaker 5: I've got to do something with my life. So I

359
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Speaker 5: rang an ex girlfriend, Lisa. I hadn't seen her for

360
00:17:43,321 --> 00:17:44,640
Speaker 5: like a couple of years, and I said to Lise,

361
00:17:44,761 --> 00:17:47,000
Speaker 5: I'm in a bit of trouble. She's like a bit

362
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Speaker 5: of trouble. You have people looking for you everywhere. You

363
00:17:49,681 --> 00:17:52,241
Speaker 5: have left the biggest mess down here. I said, what

364
00:17:52,281 --> 00:17:53,520
Speaker 5: should I do? And she goes, why don't you get

365
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Speaker 5: into real estate? So this was common knowledge on the street.

366
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Speaker 3: You were definitely a targeted man and people were looking

367
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Speaker 3: for you playing and.

368
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Speaker 5: See absolutely well. When I was in real estate, maybe

369
00:18:04,481 --> 00:18:06,360
Speaker 5: a year and a half in, I've got to call

370
00:18:06,400 --> 00:18:08,400
Speaker 5: at your office one day and they said, we know

371
00:18:08,441 --> 00:18:10,521
Speaker 5: where you are and I said, well, come get me.

372
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Speaker 5: I can't do anything about it. Can get me just

373
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Speaker 5: on your phone up And I was like that was it.

374
00:18:14,961 --> 00:18:18,441
Speaker 5: But I couldn't do anything like I can't explain how

375
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Speaker 5: I was. I was a lunatic.

376
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Speaker 4: And I think too, Matt.

377
00:18:22,201 --> 00:18:24,640
Speaker 3: When you get to that stage, and for many of

378
00:18:24,640 --> 00:18:27,001
Speaker 3: the listeners out there, I'm sure that there's quite a

379
00:18:27,041 --> 00:18:29,400
Speaker 3: few people who have been in a similar position. Maybe

380
00:18:29,441 --> 00:18:33,160
Speaker 3: not at that level, but definitely within that space of debt.

381
00:18:33,640 --> 00:18:35,920
Speaker 3: People are looking for them, threats on their lives and

382
00:18:35,961 --> 00:18:41,120
Speaker 3: so on. You're so just care factor of zero, like

383
00:18:41,201 --> 00:18:44,720
Speaker 3: it is, well, hey, whatever, come and deal with it,

384
00:18:44,761 --> 00:18:46,760
Speaker 3: Come and do what you got to do, Like you

385
00:18:46,801 --> 00:18:49,360
Speaker 3: get beyond that worrying, you know what I mean, it

386
00:18:49,400 --> 00:18:50,400
Speaker 3: is what it's just going to be.

387
00:18:50,441 --> 00:18:51,041
Speaker 4: What it's going to be.

388
00:18:51,041 --> 00:18:52,880
Speaker 3: You're going to either walk out of that real estate

389
00:18:52,880 --> 00:18:54,321
Speaker 3: and you're gonna eat grab or you're going to get

390
00:18:54,321 --> 00:18:54,720
Speaker 3: a bullet.

391
00:18:55,360 --> 00:18:57,361
Speaker 5: And what actually happened. The people that I used to

392
00:18:57,360 --> 00:18:59,640
Speaker 5: sort of do things with I stuffed up once before

393
00:18:59,961 --> 00:19:01,680
Speaker 5: and I said to him, can I work it off?

394
00:19:02,001 --> 00:19:04,360
Speaker 5: I was a bad business but I should not have joke.

395
00:19:05,160 --> 00:19:07,321
Speaker 5: I was just I just I just eat them all

396
00:19:07,360 --> 00:19:10,401
Speaker 5: I give them. I was a terrible business person anyway,

397
00:19:12,041 --> 00:19:13,840
Speaker 5: and I worked it off once. But when I stuffed

398
00:19:13,880 --> 00:19:15,481
Speaker 5: up again, I went and do this and he said,

399
00:19:15,561 --> 00:19:18,041
Speaker 5: not not this time. Yeah, you know, what do you do?

400
00:19:18,600 --> 00:19:18,801
Speaker 4: Wow?

401
00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:21,240
Speaker 5: Yeah? And then I grabbed the Yellow Pages and I

402
00:19:21,321 --> 00:19:23,281
Speaker 5: rang everybody in the Yellow Pages and just said, do

403
00:19:23,321 --> 00:19:24,921
Speaker 5: you have a trainee ship? But I had no idea

404
00:19:24,961 --> 00:19:28,561
Speaker 5: what real estate was at all. And one lady, just

405
00:19:28,600 --> 00:19:31,321
Speaker 5: one out of everyone, and this one lady said, yeah,

406
00:19:31,321 --> 00:19:33,201
Speaker 5: I'll give you a job, and I said, but I don't.

407
00:19:33,281 --> 00:19:35,400
Speaker 5: And Dino's parents wanted me out of the house now

408
00:19:35,400 --> 00:19:37,321
Speaker 5: they'd had enough of this weird guy out the back.

409
00:19:37,961 --> 00:19:39,961
Speaker 5: I said, I don't have a home and I don't

410
00:19:40,241 --> 00:19:42,921
Speaker 5: have a car, but I don't have any clothes either.

411
00:19:42,961 --> 00:19:45,640
Speaker 5: Like I just had a gym, pants and a bond single.

412
00:19:45,640 --> 00:19:47,961
Speaker 5: It's that's all I had, and I had like two

413
00:19:48,001 --> 00:19:50,120
Speaker 5: of them. I didn't have anything else. She said, that's

414
00:19:50,120 --> 00:19:52,241
Speaker 5: all right, I've got a caravan on my acreage. I'll

415
00:19:52,281 --> 00:19:55,640
Speaker 5: put you in there. And then i'd been sitting there

416
00:19:55,681 --> 00:19:57,561
Speaker 5: for years, had like Huntsmen's in it and things, but

417
00:19:57,721 --> 00:19:59,761
Speaker 5: that was fine. I just got in there, and she

418
00:19:59,880 --> 00:20:02,201
Speaker 5: said to me, it doesn't matter about a car, because

419
00:20:02,201 --> 00:20:04,880
Speaker 5: I want you to doorknock every day. And I just

420
00:20:04,880 --> 00:20:08,120
Speaker 5: just walk the streets every day all day from morning

421
00:20:08,201 --> 00:20:10,321
Speaker 5: till the night and just ask people if they want

422
00:20:10,321 --> 00:20:12,241
Speaker 5: to sell their house. I did that for itvors.

423
00:20:12,640 --> 00:20:15,920
Speaker 3: When you put the lifestyle that you did live, and

424
00:20:16,001 --> 00:20:17,521
Speaker 3: I often do this with myself.

425
00:20:17,721 --> 00:20:17,920
Speaker 4: You know.

426
00:20:18,080 --> 00:20:21,120
Speaker 3: I implement that in my daily living and I take

427
00:20:21,600 --> 00:20:25,241
Speaker 3: what my street knowledge is or was, and I try

428
00:20:25,281 --> 00:20:27,521
Speaker 3: and put that into business to be the best version

429
00:20:27,561 --> 00:20:31,041
Speaker 3: of me. Am I every day living and growth, the strength,

430
00:20:31,201 --> 00:20:34,160
Speaker 3: the resilience. You know, I am a little bit o CD.

431
00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:36,561
Speaker 3: You know, my bipolar kicks in and you know all

432
00:20:36,561 --> 00:20:39,840
Speaker 3: these sort of things. It's like, okay, well now I

433
00:20:39,921 --> 00:20:43,801
Speaker 3: understand it all. It's a gift, and now how can

434
00:20:43,880 --> 00:20:46,881
Speaker 3: I be the best version of me? I did say

435
00:20:46,880 --> 00:20:50,080
Speaker 3: in the beginning, you're somebody whom I'm inspired by, and

436
00:20:50,521 --> 00:20:53,480
Speaker 3: I mean that because of right now what you're saying

437
00:20:53,481 --> 00:20:55,840
Speaker 3: to where we'll get to and where you are, and

438
00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:58,720
Speaker 3: I'm sure it's still not where you want to finish

439
00:20:58,801 --> 00:21:02,521
Speaker 3: at any stage just yet, there's so much ahead for me.

440
00:21:03,321 --> 00:21:07,200
Speaker 3: I've implemented that way of thinking, how to make a

441
00:21:07,241 --> 00:21:09,561
Speaker 3: quicker and how do I network? How do I talk

442
00:21:09,600 --> 00:21:11,801
Speaker 3: to this person or that person on this level or

443
00:21:11,801 --> 00:21:16,521
Speaker 3: this level to then create that moment of opportunity which

444
00:21:16,561 --> 00:21:18,880
Speaker 3: is exactly what we would do back then, isn't it

445
00:21:18,961 --> 00:21:20,201
Speaker 3: create that opportunity?

446
00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:22,760
Speaker 5: Mate? I used to see this. I saw a lot

447
00:21:22,761 --> 00:21:24,681
Speaker 5: of strippers and a lot of prostitutes over the years,

448
00:21:24,681 --> 00:21:28,041
Speaker 5: like as in not pay them their girlfriends. And this

449
00:21:28,120 --> 00:21:30,680
Speaker 5: one Melissa said, You're just amazing. You can just like

450
00:21:30,761 --> 00:21:32,440
Speaker 5: pull ten thousand dollars out of nowhere.

451
00:21:32,561 --> 00:21:33,001
Speaker 4: Exactly.

452
00:21:34,721 --> 00:21:36,920
Speaker 5: I guess so because I had no money, Like I

453
00:21:36,961 --> 00:21:38,600
Speaker 5: have no money and then two hours later, I have

454
00:21:38,681 --> 00:21:41,360
Speaker 5: like ten thousand dollars or bags fulls of drugs and

455
00:21:41,360 --> 00:21:44,001
Speaker 5: it's like, anyway, yeah, you.

456
00:21:44,041 --> 00:21:47,000
Speaker 3: Touched on and what a great interview if Mark Boris

457
00:21:48,360 --> 00:21:51,120
Speaker 3: I did just skim over a little bit of that

458
00:21:51,201 --> 00:21:53,840
Speaker 3: interview in reference to a little bit of a background

459
00:21:53,921 --> 00:21:56,120
Speaker 3: to where we are talking about now and you talk

460
00:21:56,160 --> 00:21:56,840
Speaker 3: about Dino.

461
00:21:58,160 --> 00:21:59,600
Speaker 4: I get it now, I get it.

462
00:21:59,640 --> 00:22:02,080
Speaker 3: There was a moment that you made a call to

463
00:22:02,120 --> 00:22:06,680
Speaker 3: Dino where it was jail or you basically get your

464
00:22:06,681 --> 00:22:09,960
Speaker 3: shit together and you fucking win and you made a

465
00:22:10,001 --> 00:22:14,401
Speaker 3: commitment to him, and I now understand, And if you'd

466
00:22:14,481 --> 00:22:16,680
Speaker 3: like to share that with our audience, what relevance that

467
00:22:16,840 --> 00:22:20,161
Speaker 3: is today and your best mate and somebody whom has

468
00:22:20,201 --> 00:22:23,360
Speaker 3: been there obviously like I said, how I understand it

469
00:22:23,441 --> 00:22:25,600
Speaker 3: from your darkest, darkest moments.

470
00:22:26,241 --> 00:22:28,761
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's just all these moments happened, these weird things.

471
00:22:28,801 --> 00:22:31,200
Speaker 5: So I had a gun at Dino's house and I

472
00:22:31,281 --> 00:22:34,281
Speaker 5: was driving along with him because I didn't have a cast.

473
00:22:34,321 --> 00:22:35,880
Speaker 5: I drove everywhere with him. He's like, it was like

474
00:22:35,921 --> 00:22:39,160
Speaker 5: my dad in a way. We're just like, let's go

475
00:22:39,201 --> 00:22:42,001
Speaker 5: down to the shop area and just take me down. That

476
00:22:42,080 --> 00:22:45,201
Speaker 5: one day, I was driving along with him and I thought,

477
00:22:45,281 --> 00:22:47,520
Speaker 5: I'm just going to shoot myself in the head. I

478
00:22:47,600 --> 00:22:50,281
Speaker 5: just I've had enough. I've got the gun at home.

479
00:22:51,600 --> 00:22:53,840
Speaker 5: It was so low I can't explain it. And he

480
00:22:53,880 --> 00:22:57,521
Speaker 5: turns around out of nowhere and said, Matt, promise me

481
00:22:57,561 --> 00:23:01,281
Speaker 5: you won't kill yourself. And it was like, I can't

482
00:23:01,561 --> 00:23:03,880
Speaker 5: tell you. It was this moment and I was like,

483
00:23:04,241 --> 00:23:06,041
Speaker 5: and I said, then I'll promise you. I'm not going

484
00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:09,001
Speaker 5: to I reckon. I would have if it wasn't for him.

485
00:23:09,441 --> 00:23:12,121
Speaker 4: And he's really kept you accountable, hasn't he in your.

486
00:23:13,681 --> 00:23:16,840
Speaker 5: Other night? Like we're still best mates. He's a legend

487
00:23:17,201 --> 00:23:19,241
Speaker 5: and any but he's instinct. I don't know, we were

488
00:23:19,281 --> 00:23:21,321
Speaker 5: just I don't know where he came from. Imagine I

489
00:23:21,321 --> 00:23:23,801
Speaker 5: didn't go to Terrago the night. Anyway, I was working.

490
00:23:24,201 --> 00:23:26,281
Speaker 5: About a year later, I got offered a job across

491
00:23:26,281 --> 00:23:27,881
Speaker 5: the road. He should drive me to work every day

492
00:23:28,201 --> 00:23:30,840
Speaker 5: and he was a landscaper, so he dropped me off,

493
00:23:31,080 --> 00:23:34,161
Speaker 5: packed me some lunch, and then about a year later

494
00:23:34,201 --> 00:23:36,321
Speaker 5: I got offered a job across the road because things

495
00:23:36,321 --> 00:23:38,561
Speaker 5: were like really racing along. Everyone's like, who's this guy

496
00:23:38,681 --> 00:23:41,360
Speaker 5: like finding all these leads because the home office that

497
00:23:41,441 --> 00:23:43,841
Speaker 5: I worked out of, which is across the road from

498
00:23:43,880 --> 00:23:46,041
Speaker 5: the strip of shops, it was like this little home

499
00:23:46,041 --> 00:23:49,561
Speaker 5: office thing. No one. No one really liked this lady

500
00:23:49,561 --> 00:23:52,921
Speaker 5: that much. I didn't know. I had no idea who

501
00:23:53,080 --> 00:23:55,840
Speaker 5: was what. But she started to list all these houses

502
00:23:55,840 --> 00:23:58,681
Speaker 5: because I was finding them all. So this other guy

503
00:23:58,721 --> 00:24:01,761
Speaker 5: across the road at peter Brand real Estate, he offered

504
00:24:01,761 --> 00:24:03,640
Speaker 5: me a job, and I was like, yeah, I'll go

505
00:24:03,681 --> 00:24:05,521
Speaker 5: across there because that was the side to be on.

506
00:24:06,721 --> 00:24:08,921
Speaker 5: That's where they're all the shops flat. I was like, oh, yeah,

507
00:24:08,921 --> 00:24:11,281
Speaker 5: I go there. Anyway, I got the bus home one

508
00:24:11,360 --> 00:24:14,961
Speaker 5: night and I'd gone from the caravan. I was engaged

509
00:24:15,001 --> 00:24:18,241
Speaker 5: to Karina by this point, and I rented a room

510
00:24:18,400 --> 00:24:21,281
Speaker 5: off this elderly lady who was like Way in her eighties.

511
00:24:21,321 --> 00:24:24,521
Speaker 5: Her name was Tina, friends of Karna's family. And I

512
00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:26,961
Speaker 5: get the bus home seven point thirty odd one night

513
00:24:27,120 --> 00:24:30,241
Speaker 5: was dark, and then walk in and the phone ringing

514
00:24:30,321 --> 00:24:32,400
Speaker 5: in Tina's house and I was a bit in hiding

515
00:24:32,721 --> 00:24:34,801
Speaker 5: like I was. I didn't go to Sydney for about

516
00:24:34,801 --> 00:24:37,241
Speaker 5: fifteen years. I get so much sweat on my hands.

517
00:24:37,321 --> 00:24:39,680
Speaker 3: I was just about to ask you, were you concerned

518
00:24:39,681 --> 00:24:42,080
Speaker 3: for your welfare now that you were starting to sort of,

519
00:24:42,321 --> 00:24:45,840
Speaker 3: I guess, become a part of society in what would

520
00:24:45,840 --> 00:24:48,680
Speaker 3: be classed as the normal way. You get up, you

521
00:24:48,721 --> 00:24:51,121
Speaker 3: go to work, you're a face, you're in the public,

522
00:24:51,201 --> 00:24:53,521
Speaker 3: you're not hiding from people. You're not in the dark

523
00:24:53,561 --> 00:24:56,481
Speaker 3: dingy little room. You're actually out there. And as you said,

524
00:24:56,840 --> 00:25:00,681
Speaker 3: walking the streets, you are a target. How did you

525
00:25:00,801 --> 00:25:03,161
Speaker 3: sort of mentally deal with that or was it still

526
00:25:03,201 --> 00:25:05,440
Speaker 3: that mindset of well it is it is.

527
00:25:05,481 --> 00:25:09,361
Speaker 5: And I was so anxious. Yeah, I couldn't go anywhere,

528
00:25:09,400 --> 00:25:12,281
Speaker 5: like I list couldn't go anywhere, like just in my head,

529
00:25:12,481 --> 00:25:16,081
Speaker 5: wouldn't go to Sydney. We'll go near Sydney for so long. Yeah. Anyway,

530
00:25:16,201 --> 00:25:18,600
Speaker 5: I got the bus home walked into Tina's phone, ringing,

531
00:25:18,880 --> 00:25:20,761
Speaker 5: I pick it up and Ray from the Fish and

532
00:25:20,801 --> 00:25:23,521
Speaker 5: chip shop. He goes, hey, Matt, it's Ray from the

533
00:25:23,521 --> 00:25:26,521
Speaker 5: fish and chip shop. I'm like, Ray, how did you

534
00:25:26,521 --> 00:25:29,721
Speaker 5: even get this number? He was an ex heroin dealer

535
00:25:29,761 --> 00:25:31,481
Speaker 5: from the Cross. He was up there and hiding too.

536
00:25:31,521 --> 00:25:34,041
Speaker 5: I'm sure he was. Anyway, he's on methadone, you know

537
00:25:34,080 --> 00:25:37,041
Speaker 5: when people on Macedonia consider like. He tell a bit

538
00:25:37,041 --> 00:25:42,241
Speaker 5: and he's like, oh, anyway, he goes, mate, I said,

539
00:25:42,241 --> 00:25:44,481
Speaker 5: how'd you get the number? He goes, don't worry about that.

540
00:25:45,001 --> 00:25:48,200
Speaker 5: You've just been on Australia's Most Wanted. And I'm like,

541
00:25:48,481 --> 00:25:53,080
Speaker 5: what bugger? I'm like really, And then Karina's dad turns

542
00:25:53,160 --> 00:25:56,360
Speaker 5: up on the doorstep like five minutes later, huffing and puffing.

543
00:25:56,640 --> 00:25:59,440
Speaker 5: He ran down from their house streets away. The whole

544
00:25:59,481 --> 00:26:01,801
Speaker 5: family was watching the show. You know, it's the show

545
00:26:01,840 --> 00:26:03,120
Speaker 5: Australias Most Wanted.

546
00:26:03,041 --> 00:26:05,000
Speaker 3: And back then everybody watched it because it was like,

547
00:26:05,160 --> 00:26:08,561
Speaker 3: well everybody knew somebody. I just wanted to see it

548
00:26:08,600 --> 00:26:10,521
Speaker 3: because it was one of those things that was never

549
00:26:10,561 --> 00:26:11,120
Speaker 3: spoken of.

550
00:26:11,241 --> 00:26:11,721
Speaker 4: It was just.

551
00:26:11,721 --> 00:26:18,080
Speaker 5: Like all their six kids are this Mormon family parents

552
00:26:18,080 --> 00:26:20,360
Speaker 5: and the six kids all watching it and ip eiepop

553
00:26:21,001 --> 00:26:23,000
Speaker 5: and then he turns up and he goes, We've got

554
00:26:23,041 --> 00:26:25,281
Speaker 5: to talk, and I'm like yeah. He's like huffing and puffing,

555
00:26:25,321 --> 00:26:27,200
Speaker 5: and I'm like, yeah, we do. So I went and

556
00:26:27,400 --> 00:26:30,920
Speaker 5: handed myself back in in Sydney, went straight to court.

557
00:26:31,241 --> 00:26:34,920
Speaker 5: Karina's mum came and testified. Tina came and testified, and

558
00:26:34,961 --> 00:26:38,001
Speaker 5: she was amazing. She's up in the stand and she goes, oh,

559
00:26:38,160 --> 00:26:40,880
Speaker 5: that's such a lovely boy. Who feeds my cat. He

560
00:26:41,001 --> 00:26:46,120
Speaker 5: takes my washing out. And Karina's mum told a story.

561
00:26:46,120 --> 00:26:47,881
Speaker 5: I had ten bucks, that's all I had one day

562
00:26:48,241 --> 00:26:51,720
Speaker 5: to my name, and her son's bike got stolen, so

563
00:26:51,721 --> 00:26:53,640
Speaker 5: I went and bought one off someone for ten bucks.

564
00:26:54,080 --> 00:26:56,480
Speaker 5: And then she was telling the story and crying in

565
00:26:56,521 --> 00:26:59,321
Speaker 5: the stand. Anyway, at the end of the hearing, the

566
00:26:59,400 --> 00:27:02,281
Speaker 5: judge looks at me and she goes, Matt, you should

567
00:27:02,281 --> 00:27:04,001
Speaker 5: be going to jail for quite a few years today,

568
00:27:04,681 --> 00:27:06,120
Speaker 5: she said, but I just see some good in you,

569
00:27:07,041 --> 00:27:08,880
Speaker 5: and I'm going to give you a second chance. I

570
00:27:08,921 --> 00:27:10,961
Speaker 5: had to do community service for I don't know how

571
00:27:10,961 --> 00:27:12,440
Speaker 5: long it was. It was quite a long time. We

572
00:27:12,521 --> 00:27:15,880
Speaker 5: fell like forever. But while I was working as well,

573
00:27:16,521 --> 00:27:18,440
Speaker 5: and it took me eight years to pay back all

574
00:27:18,481 --> 00:27:21,321
Speaker 5: the fines that I got for all different things. But

575
00:27:21,400 --> 00:27:23,880
Speaker 5: she said to me, if I see you back here again,

576
00:27:24,001 --> 00:27:26,681
Speaker 5: you will go away for half of your life. That's

577
00:27:26,721 --> 00:27:31,321
Speaker 5: for sure. I walked out of the courtroom, got Karna's phone,

578
00:27:31,840 --> 00:27:34,400
Speaker 5: rang Dino and said, Mae, I'm going to make your promise.

579
00:27:34,400 --> 00:27:36,561
Speaker 5: I'm going to become astray as number one aged. I've

580
00:27:36,600 --> 00:27:38,680
Speaker 5: never broken it. I've just stayed on that path.

581
00:27:40,080 --> 00:27:42,480
Speaker 3: I love that the way that you glow when you

582
00:27:42,521 --> 00:27:46,321
Speaker 3: say that, you know, the look on no, I really do.

583
00:27:46,600 --> 00:27:49,521
Speaker 4: And I think that you know, for anybody out there.

584
00:27:49,400 --> 00:27:52,840
Speaker 3: That's in a hole at the moment or feels systems

585
00:27:52,840 --> 00:27:56,120
Speaker 3: against them, the world's against they're in addiction, you know.

586
00:27:56,201 --> 00:27:59,801
Speaker 3: For me, having my background in the many years that

587
00:27:59,880 --> 00:28:02,521
Speaker 3: I was incarcerated to then you know, obviously being a

588
00:28:02,600 --> 00:28:06,360
Speaker 3: dad of four children, it's I think you don't break

589
00:28:06,521 --> 00:28:09,440
Speaker 3: if you make a promise. And for me, nine times

590
00:28:09,441 --> 00:28:12,120
Speaker 3: out of ten, I promise nothing because you can't guarantee it,

591
00:28:13,001 --> 00:28:17,080
Speaker 3: especially when it's something out of your control. You've literally

592
00:28:17,120 --> 00:28:20,761
Speaker 3: not once, but several times given Dino these promises, and

593
00:28:20,801 --> 00:28:24,200
Speaker 3: they are all positive promises of you moving forward in

594
00:28:24,321 --> 00:28:27,440
Speaker 3: such a productive way to become the man you are today.

595
00:28:28,521 --> 00:28:31,880
Speaker 3: Was there a time there, though, that you felt or

596
00:28:31,921 --> 00:28:35,200
Speaker 3: were in a situation where you may have broken that

597
00:28:35,321 --> 00:28:37,281
Speaker 3: promise and you've had to sit there and go, hang

598
00:28:37,281 --> 00:28:37,721
Speaker 3: on a seat.

599
00:28:38,361 --> 00:28:40,281
Speaker 4: This is not good. I need to stay on that

600
00:28:40,761 --> 00:28:41,641
Speaker 4: straight line.

601
00:28:42,401 --> 00:28:45,200
Speaker 5: Not really. Like I relapsed drug wise a number of

602
00:28:45,241 --> 00:28:48,561
Speaker 5: times when I got shaws the first time and well

603
00:28:48,681 --> 00:28:51,001
Speaker 5: second time. I relapsed in the drug side, but the

604
00:28:51,041 --> 00:28:54,081
Speaker 5: work side, I never skipped the beat. I kept showing up.

605
00:28:54,161 --> 00:28:58,001
Speaker 5: I kept doing my thing. The drug thing took it went,

606
00:28:58,121 --> 00:29:00,321
Speaker 5: and then it had creep back in and then like

607
00:29:00,401 --> 00:29:03,401
Speaker 5: that took a long time to get Like now, if

608
00:29:03,441 --> 00:29:06,801
Speaker 5: I had a line of Koki and even Nellie touch it, but.

609
00:29:07,361 --> 00:29:09,441
Speaker 3: Well, you wouldn't know if it was coke these days,

610
00:29:09,441 --> 00:29:10,801
Speaker 3: So that's a good choice.

611
00:29:11,681 --> 00:29:14,241
Speaker 4: I agree. I'm the same. I can tell you now, mate,

612
00:29:14,241 --> 00:29:16,321
Speaker 4: you can take it away, thanks.

613
00:29:16,921 --> 00:29:19,521
Speaker 5: Because now I'm attached to the outcome. And before I

614
00:29:19,601 --> 00:29:21,961
Speaker 5: took a long time to develop that muscle, like I'm

615
00:29:21,961 --> 00:29:25,361
Speaker 5: talking well into my forties. Yeah, well you know, and

616
00:29:25,401 --> 00:29:27,200
Speaker 5: it was drinking, like if I had one. I was

617
00:29:27,241 --> 00:29:29,681
Speaker 5: never a big drinker, but at one drink gone. Yeah,

618
00:29:29,761 --> 00:29:31,321
Speaker 5: forget it. I'm off with the train.

619
00:29:31,641 --> 00:29:32,161
Speaker 4: I'm the same.

620
00:29:32,241 --> 00:29:34,401
Speaker 3: It's either do or don't, and it's all in or nothing,

621
00:29:34,401 --> 00:29:36,161
Speaker 3: and you know, and it's sort of you got one

622
00:29:36,201 --> 00:29:38,281
Speaker 3: in one hand and the straw and the other, you

623
00:29:38,321 --> 00:29:38,841
Speaker 3: know what I mean.

624
00:29:38,881 --> 00:29:42,281
Speaker 4: And it's just it's what happens and what becomes the norm.

625
00:29:42,881 --> 00:29:43,601
Speaker 4: So you know.

626
00:29:43,721 --> 00:29:46,801
Speaker 3: And I have had this conversation recently with somebody who

627
00:29:46,841 --> 00:29:49,241
Speaker 3: reached out, and I just said, you've got to take

628
00:29:49,281 --> 00:29:53,200
Speaker 3: control and acknowledge it, accept it and just go I

629
00:29:53,241 --> 00:29:55,440
Speaker 3: don't do it. It's as simple as that. You can't

630
00:29:55,481 --> 00:29:58,361
Speaker 3: have it halfway and say that I'm okay. You're either

631
00:29:58,401 --> 00:30:01,441
Speaker 3: not okay and you don't do it, and you make

632
00:30:01,481 --> 00:30:02,281
Speaker 3: better choices.

633
00:30:02,961 --> 00:30:05,801
Speaker 4: Hence, let me look at your life, look where you today.

634
00:30:05,761 --> 00:30:08,401
Speaker 5: Yeah, but I think it's a muscle. I think people

635
00:30:08,401 --> 00:30:11,000
Speaker 5: don't realize that. And not to labor the point, but

636
00:30:11,681 --> 00:30:13,801
Speaker 5: I was on the phone to someone yesterday, a gambler,

637
00:30:13,841 --> 00:30:15,480
Speaker 5: and I said, mate, you're going to fall off the

638
00:30:15,481 --> 00:30:17,761
Speaker 5: cart again, probably, but don't beat yourself up. Just get

639
00:30:17,841 --> 00:30:20,480
Speaker 5: up and you get a little bit stronger, and then

640
00:30:20,481 --> 00:30:22,441
Speaker 5: you get a little bit stronger. I think people think

641
00:30:22,481 --> 00:30:24,961
Speaker 5: they've got to just be you know, Matt or Brent.

642
00:30:25,081 --> 00:30:27,760
Speaker 5: It's like finished, you know, and it's I found with myself.

643
00:30:27,761 --> 00:30:29,641
Speaker 5: It was a muscle, But you can't use that as

644
00:30:29,641 --> 00:30:31,641
Speaker 5: an excuse. I'll go out and then I'll just try

645
00:30:31,681 --> 00:30:34,681
Speaker 5: it on Monday. I genuinely found when I got triggered,

646
00:30:35,081 --> 00:30:37,280
Speaker 5: I started to learn that there's definite triggers, like one

647
00:30:37,321 --> 00:30:40,480
Speaker 5: hundred percent. Yes, you go to a party and you

648
00:30:40,561 --> 00:30:42,841
Speaker 5: have a beer, You're going to get triggered. You go

649
00:30:42,921 --> 00:30:45,121
Speaker 5: through a painful thing like a divorce or a death

650
00:30:45,241 --> 00:30:47,481
Speaker 5: or something, your body's going to getriggered in different ways.

651
00:30:47,521 --> 00:30:50,201
Speaker 5: You know, look to ease it correct. So it took

652
00:30:50,201 --> 00:30:51,801
Speaker 5: me a long time to work that out.

653
00:30:53,121 --> 00:30:56,041
Speaker 3: I think the biggest thing there is understanding that it

654
00:30:56,161 --> 00:30:59,121
Speaker 3: is okay to trip and we all do it. Like

655
00:30:59,201 --> 00:31:01,641
Speaker 3: you just said, you know, like it hasn't been smooth sailing,

656
00:31:01,681 --> 00:31:05,801
Speaker 3: you've relapsed. I did see something just recently that was

657
00:31:06,361 --> 00:31:09,081
Speaker 3: a very valid point. And this is not to discredit

658
00:31:09,161 --> 00:31:13,081
Speaker 3: or take anything away from anybody whom is in recovery.

659
00:31:13,201 --> 00:31:15,521
Speaker 3: Credit to you, and I pray to God that you

660
00:31:15,841 --> 00:31:19,321
Speaker 3: find the strength to continue. But it was a label

661
00:31:19,881 --> 00:31:21,841
Speaker 3: and it's resonated with me, and I think that you

662
00:31:21,961 --> 00:31:25,401
Speaker 3: may respect. What I'm going to say here is that

663
00:31:25,441 --> 00:31:29,521
Speaker 3: you are a recovering addict. You're always going to be

664
00:31:29,601 --> 00:31:34,361
Speaker 3: a recovering addict. The gentleman who made that point in

665
00:31:34,441 --> 00:31:38,841
Speaker 3: this post is somebody who had an addiction with ice

666
00:31:38,921 --> 00:31:43,240
Speaker 3: and other drugs. He's in recovery. He has recently relapsed

667
00:31:43,441 --> 00:31:46,081
Speaker 3: some time in the last six months, which is okay,

668
00:31:46,201 --> 00:31:49,361
Speaker 3: it happens. Pick yourself up, let's start again, back to

669
00:31:49,401 --> 00:31:53,361
Speaker 3: ground zero and grow. But do we want to keep

670
00:31:53,401 --> 00:31:57,281
Speaker 3: being reminded that I'm an addict, I'm a junkie.

671
00:31:57,401 --> 00:31:59,361
Speaker 4: You know. It's a good smack in the head.

672
00:31:59,401 --> 00:32:02,841
Speaker 3: I guess to oneself at times if you can absorb

673
00:32:02,921 --> 00:32:06,521
Speaker 3: that and appreciate how far you've come from addiction. But

674
00:32:06,641 --> 00:32:08,921
Speaker 3: do you want to keep reminding yourself that you are

675
00:32:09,081 --> 00:32:14,401
Speaker 3: in a recovery position of addiction for life? I feel

676
00:32:14,401 --> 00:32:19,881
Speaker 3: that there's better ways of accepting and processing and moving forward.

677
00:32:20,641 --> 00:32:25,121
Speaker 3: Like for you, you're a successful businessman, you're a great father,

678
00:32:25,521 --> 00:32:29,401
Speaker 3: you're a good husband, there's so many more qualities. Or

679
00:32:29,401 --> 00:32:31,041
Speaker 3: do you go to your children and say, yeah, look,

680
00:32:31,121 --> 00:32:33,761
Speaker 3: dad's a recovering addict and just you know, just say

681
00:32:33,801 --> 00:32:34,720
Speaker 3: you understand it.

682
00:32:35,521 --> 00:32:36,681
Speaker 4: You know, if your friends.

683
00:32:36,361 --> 00:32:38,201
Speaker 3: Have a party and they pull out a bag, just

684
00:32:38,481 --> 00:32:39,960
Speaker 3: you know, please don't pull.

685
00:32:39,841 --> 00:32:43,561
Speaker 4: It in front. Do you understand where I'm coming from?

686
00:32:44,201 --> 00:32:47,761
Speaker 3: And I think that mentally has a lot of weight

687
00:32:47,961 --> 00:32:50,481
Speaker 3: into how we move forward in life.

688
00:32:51,041 --> 00:32:53,161
Speaker 5: Well, people talk about a diction like it's a disease

689
00:32:53,201 --> 00:32:55,480
Speaker 5: and it's not. And I'm only speaking from experience, you know.

690
00:32:55,801 --> 00:32:57,921
Speaker 5: People Sometimes people go, you're not a psychologist, You're not

691
00:32:58,001 --> 00:32:58,321
Speaker 5: this thing.

692
00:32:58,321 --> 00:33:00,961
Speaker 3: I'm not, No, but we lived experienced people who probably

693
00:33:01,081 --> 00:33:03,521
Speaker 3: have more experience than a psychologist.

694
00:33:04,561 --> 00:33:06,841
Speaker 5: Addictions. It's just an interest, Like you're just interested in it,

695
00:33:06,921 --> 00:33:09,441
Speaker 5: like in anything. So it could be porn, it could

696
00:33:09,481 --> 00:33:11,881
Speaker 5: be surfing, it could be work, it could be anything.

697
00:33:11,921 --> 00:33:14,760
Speaker 5: It's just it's a personality type. You're interested in that

698
00:33:14,801 --> 00:33:17,281
Speaker 5: thing and you like it. That's why people become addicted.

699
00:33:17,361 --> 00:33:19,921
Speaker 5: They like it, you know, and you've just got to

700
00:33:19,961 --> 00:33:21,881
Speaker 5: shift it. And I think if you got that type

701
00:33:21,921 --> 00:33:23,760
Speaker 5: of personality, I need something to focus on.

702
00:33:24,321 --> 00:33:26,801
Speaker 3: Yes, I've always got to have a goal. I've always

703
00:33:26,801 --> 00:33:29,401
Speaker 3: got to have a goal. When I'd finished my last

704
00:33:29,441 --> 00:33:34,121
Speaker 3: sentence twenty fourteen, i'd finished six years for importation. Now

705
00:33:34,441 --> 00:33:37,521
Speaker 3: I came out with three years. I was under federal parole.

706
00:33:37,641 --> 00:33:41,041
Speaker 3: So it was three years and I needed purpose. I

707
00:33:41,121 --> 00:33:45,561
Speaker 3: had two children, oldest sons twenty six. I'd lost that relationship,

708
00:33:45,801 --> 00:33:49,641
Speaker 3: but my wife whom had our daughter, and then she

709
00:33:49,761 --> 00:33:52,361
Speaker 3: was pregnant when I was arrested, so she'd raised my

710
00:33:52,641 --> 00:33:56,201
Speaker 3: second son. I needed to be a dad. I needed

711
00:33:56,201 --> 00:33:58,001
Speaker 3: to learn to be a dad, a good husband, and

712
00:33:58,161 --> 00:34:01,441
Speaker 3: somebody whom my children could not just type the name

713
00:34:01,481 --> 00:34:04,361
Speaker 3: in and see this notorious this or you know X

714
00:34:04,401 --> 00:34:07,081
Speaker 3: this or X that whatever. And I thought, what can

715
00:34:07,121 --> 00:34:10,801
Speaker 3: I do? And as a survivor of suicidality, living with

716
00:34:10,881 --> 00:34:14,241
Speaker 3: mental health and like yourself, losing people close to you,

717
00:34:14,761 --> 00:34:17,121
Speaker 3: what could I do? What could I put into life

718
00:34:17,481 --> 00:34:20,881
Speaker 3: to make a difference through my own lived experience? And

719
00:34:20,961 --> 00:34:23,281
Speaker 3: I decided to ride a pushbike across Australia from east

720
00:34:23,321 --> 00:34:24,721
Speaker 3: to west and be the first to do it in

721
00:34:24,801 --> 00:34:29,881
Speaker 3: under fifty days and successfully did so. How then it

722
00:34:30,041 --> 00:34:32,681
Speaker 3: changed me and the depths I had to go to

723
00:34:32,681 --> 00:34:35,921
Speaker 3: to realize I never want to go back to those

724
00:34:35,961 --> 00:34:40,321
Speaker 3: places again and battle my inner demons, like I live

725
00:34:40,361 --> 00:34:41,721
Speaker 3: with mental health issues every day.

726
00:34:41,721 --> 00:34:43,041
Speaker 4: We all do you know what I mean?

727
00:34:43,121 --> 00:34:46,201
Speaker 3: Like I think that if you don't, that's exactly right,

728
00:34:46,681 --> 00:34:51,241
Speaker 3: let's just be honest. But how do you embrace it?

729
00:34:51,921 --> 00:34:54,521
Speaker 3: How do you make it your superpower? And how do

730
00:34:54,601 --> 00:34:58,001
Speaker 3: you become great? And how many times do we have

731
00:34:58,041 --> 00:34:59,841
Speaker 3: to trip over and go shit, that wasn't for me.

732
00:34:59,961 --> 00:35:01,441
Speaker 3: I'm not going to be that guy. I'm not going

733
00:35:01,481 --> 00:35:04,081
Speaker 3: to be the real estate aging in Australia or the

734
00:35:04,081 --> 00:35:05,281
Speaker 3: best podcast.

735
00:35:05,161 --> 00:35:06,521
Speaker 4: Or you know, whatever it may be.

736
00:35:07,521 --> 00:35:10,081
Speaker 3: The point is fucking get in there and have a

737
00:35:10,121 --> 00:35:12,841
Speaker 3: crack and put your heart and soul into something because

738
00:35:12,841 --> 00:35:15,281
Speaker 3: you will never know totally.

739
00:35:16,201 --> 00:35:18,081
Speaker 5: Well, I think you said, then Brent, it's like the

740
00:35:18,121 --> 00:35:21,881
Speaker 5: bike across Australia. What a great goal? Yeah like that, but.

741
00:35:21,801 --> 00:35:23,081
Speaker 4: It was never enough, Matt.

742
00:35:23,121 --> 00:35:24,841
Speaker 3: I had to go again, and then I did Tazzy

743
00:35:24,881 --> 00:35:27,041
Speaker 3: and then I started doing half Ironman's and then I

744
00:35:27,201 --> 00:35:29,761
Speaker 3: just like, no, good.

745
00:35:29,801 --> 00:35:31,681
Speaker 5: So good. It's like you know the guy I was

746
00:35:31,681 --> 00:35:34,001
Speaker 5: talking Yesterdays twenty three and I said, well, what do

747
00:35:34,001 --> 00:35:35,761
Speaker 5: you like doing? He goes, I like, you couldn't, you

748
00:35:35,761 --> 00:35:37,681
Speaker 5: can't get off gambling and he goes, I like training.

749
00:35:38,161 --> 00:35:40,561
Speaker 5: I like personal training and said, well become that He's

750
00:35:40,961 --> 00:35:42,960
Speaker 5: he started having a bit of a spark in his voice.

751
00:35:43,121 --> 00:35:45,841
Speaker 5: I said, see, I'm just got to follow that. It's

752
00:35:45,921 --> 00:35:48,561
Speaker 5: like every step where every choice, it's either forwards or backwards.

753
00:35:48,561 --> 00:35:49,281
Speaker 5: That's the way I see it.

754
00:35:49,281 --> 00:35:49,440
Speaker 3: Now.

755
00:35:49,481 --> 00:35:52,441
Speaker 5: I get on the steirmaster here it's a step forward,

756
00:35:52,921 --> 00:35:55,281
Speaker 5: but take a beer, it's a step backwards.

757
00:35:55,281 --> 00:35:59,041
Speaker 3: That's how I say it, one hundred percent. And look, family,

758
00:35:59,201 --> 00:36:01,521
Speaker 3: I also think is a massive part. And for those

759
00:36:01,561 --> 00:36:03,761
Speaker 3: of us that are blessed to be fathers or mothers,

760
00:36:04,081 --> 00:36:06,641
Speaker 3: whether it be throughout our own children or step children,

761
00:36:06,681 --> 00:36:09,601
Speaker 3: we are leaders. We are what our children look up to.

762
00:36:09,801 --> 00:36:09,961
Speaker 5: You know.

763
00:36:10,001 --> 00:36:11,681
Speaker 4: I'm a big believer that I have.

764
00:36:12,281 --> 00:36:14,641
Speaker 3: My sons are doing quite well in their sporting and

765
00:36:14,681 --> 00:36:18,881
Speaker 3: academics at the moment, in the elite programs, and I

766
00:36:18,921 --> 00:36:23,681
Speaker 3: expect certain levels of commitment from them and discipline. Who

767
00:36:23,681 --> 00:36:25,241
Speaker 3: am I to ask that of them? If I'm not

768
00:36:25,321 --> 00:36:28,001
Speaker 3: prepared to lead by showing that I get up at

769
00:36:28,001 --> 00:36:30,081
Speaker 3: four o'clock in the morning, I'll go run between ten

770
00:36:30,121 --> 00:36:32,681
Speaker 3: and twenty kilometers, you know, like even after a triple

771
00:36:32,681 --> 00:36:35,241
Speaker 3: spinal fusion, two blown knees, I'm still getting my ass

772
00:36:35,281 --> 00:36:38,721
Speaker 3: up and going. My fifteen year old son has seen

773
00:36:38,761 --> 00:36:41,881
Speaker 3: the growth and how much it's changed his life from

774
00:36:41,921 --> 00:36:45,881
Speaker 3: Oh dad, I can't be but it's too cold to now, Okay,

775
00:36:45,961 --> 00:36:48,801
Speaker 3: let's go to which his goal was a fifteen kilometer

776
00:36:48,921 --> 00:36:52,281
Speaker 3: run at the back end of last year in the preseason,

777
00:36:52,601 --> 00:36:55,281
Speaker 3: and he achieved it without even realizing it, because I

778
00:36:55,361 --> 00:36:57,561
Speaker 3: chose to just mentally ignore him along the way and

779
00:36:57,681 --> 00:37:00,721
Speaker 3: keep running and just say coming, son, you know, and

780
00:37:00,801 --> 00:37:02,480
Speaker 3: like it's got to the point where he's like, oh

781
00:37:02,481 --> 00:37:05,481
Speaker 3: my age you dad. You know, we stop looking at

782
00:37:05,481 --> 00:37:07,281
Speaker 3: the watch and he says, oh, what was that nine ten?

783
00:37:07,321 --> 00:37:09,241
Speaker 3: I said, no, Son, you just conquered fifteen and a

784
00:37:09,281 --> 00:37:12,561
Speaker 3: half to wow, you know. So from that moment, that

785
00:37:12,681 --> 00:37:15,681
Speaker 3: was an inspiring moment for Kishan to then want to

786
00:37:15,721 --> 00:37:18,041
Speaker 3: be great and want to be the best. He's seen

787
00:37:18,121 --> 00:37:21,201
Speaker 3: that that evolvement of just being a would I say,

788
00:37:21,441 --> 00:37:25,481
Speaker 3: if I put the effort in, if I commit, I

789
00:37:25,561 --> 00:37:29,561
Speaker 3: will get in return so much reward. Life is that

790
00:37:30,001 --> 00:37:32,361
Speaker 3: in a nutshell, isn't it it is?

791
00:37:32,401 --> 00:37:34,601
Speaker 5: I think sometimes people make it bigger than it needs

792
00:37:34,601 --> 00:37:38,681
Speaker 5: to be. Just people underestimate the power of a small

793
00:37:38,761 --> 00:37:41,641
Speaker 5: daily win, just a small daily win, a whole series

794
00:37:41,681 --> 00:37:44,161
Speaker 5: of them. And I often say to people that a

795
00:37:44,441 --> 00:37:48,361
Speaker 5: fantastic year is just nothing more than having an outstanding

796
00:37:48,441 --> 00:37:50,440
Speaker 5: days three hundred and sixty five times, so you've got

797
00:37:50,441 --> 00:37:53,161
Speaker 5: to design it that way. Sometimes we think, oh, we've

798
00:37:53,161 --> 00:37:55,761
Speaker 5: got to be this perfect person down here, this successful.

799
00:37:56,281 --> 00:37:58,561
Speaker 5: It's too far away, it's too big. It's like you

800
00:37:58,601 --> 00:38:01,001
Speaker 5: don't do anything about it. But today I can do

801
00:38:01,681 --> 00:38:04,081
Speaker 5: a great morning routine. I can go kill it at work,

802
00:38:04,361 --> 00:38:06,481
Speaker 5: a prospecting, I can eat really well, I could not

803
00:38:06,561 --> 00:38:09,161
Speaker 5: touch the drink, have a wine down thing, bit of

804
00:38:09,241 --> 00:38:10,921
Speaker 5: time with the kids, and it's a great day. What

805
00:38:11,001 --> 00:38:11,401
Speaker 5: else in it?

806
00:38:11,921 --> 00:38:15,001
Speaker 4: What is a day in the life of mat Now?

807
00:38:15,481 --> 00:38:17,521
Speaker 5: I wake up naturally. I don't use an alarm clock,

808
00:38:17,521 --> 00:38:19,440
Speaker 5: because if you have to wake up with an alarm clock,

809
00:38:19,641 --> 00:38:22,641
Speaker 5: you're actually not ready to get up. So I get

810
00:38:22,681 --> 00:38:25,841
Speaker 5: up about five five thirty. Then I'll do some breathing,

811
00:38:26,361 --> 00:38:29,561
Speaker 5: ice bath, red light bed. It depends on how much

812
00:38:29,601 --> 00:38:32,601
Speaker 5: time I've got because I make breakfast, fatara and summer,

813
00:38:33,081 --> 00:38:37,081
Speaker 5: so I make sure they're got that. And by that time,

814
00:38:37,881 --> 00:38:41,761
Speaker 5: sometimes I do cardio, sometimes not depends what work's doing.

815
00:38:41,761 --> 00:38:43,481
Speaker 5: And then I'm off into work by about nine point

816
00:38:43,481 --> 00:38:48,281
Speaker 5: thirty ten o'clock somewhere there. Look, that's all these years later.

817
00:38:48,361 --> 00:38:50,401
Speaker 5: I used to work around the clock, which we can

818
00:38:50,441 --> 00:38:52,161
Speaker 5: talk about in the set, which wasn't great, but I

819
00:38:52,241 --> 00:38:54,441
Speaker 5: did it for a long time. So then I go

820
00:38:54,481 --> 00:38:56,681
Speaker 5: into work and then I train. I have a personal

821
00:38:56,721 --> 00:38:59,761
Speaker 5: gym at Tugra's like a factory, so I get there

822
00:38:59,761 --> 00:39:03,761
Speaker 5: by three o'clock and then I train there. I'm working

823
00:39:03,801 --> 00:39:05,641
Speaker 5: all day, but just on the phone. Really, I try

824
00:39:05,641 --> 00:39:07,761
Speaker 5: and do my appointments between ten and two o'clock. But

825
00:39:07,801 --> 00:39:08,881
Speaker 5: I have a good team around me.

826
00:39:09,081 --> 00:39:09,841
Speaker 4: So just on that.

827
00:39:10,241 --> 00:39:12,761
Speaker 3: You when we talk about being a leader, you've created

828
00:39:12,881 --> 00:39:17,761
Speaker 3: eighteen around you and your your visions and your beliefs

829
00:39:18,121 --> 00:39:21,441
Speaker 3: and structure of life, and how you have gotten to

830
00:39:21,441 --> 00:39:21,921
Speaker 3: where you are.

831
00:39:22,041 --> 00:39:22,521
Speaker 4: Is that right?

832
00:39:23,161 --> 00:39:25,441
Speaker 5: Yeah? When I got to I remember it so clearly.

833
00:39:25,481 --> 00:39:27,681
Speaker 5: Forty three. I went into the doctor's office one day

834
00:39:27,721 --> 00:39:29,961
Speaker 5: and look, I just wasn't feeling great. I was ninety

835
00:39:29,961 --> 00:39:33,921
Speaker 5: three kilos, I was surfing but tired all the time.

836
00:39:34,681 --> 00:39:36,641
Speaker 5: And he goes your quarter. You did a blood test

837
00:39:36,721 --> 00:39:38,480
Speaker 5: and things. He goes your Quartersolo is through the roof.

838
00:39:38,521 --> 00:39:41,161
Speaker 5: You've got no iron, you've got no testostera, and I

839
00:39:41,161 --> 00:39:44,161
Speaker 5: had no sex drive. Nothing. He goes, I'm even surprised

840
00:39:44,161 --> 00:39:46,441
Speaker 5: you're standing up, to be honest with you, But I

841
00:39:46,481 --> 00:39:49,681
Speaker 5: worked around the clock for twenty years and I'm talking

842
00:39:50,201 --> 00:39:52,841
Speaker 5: four thirty in the morning till eleven thirty at night

843
00:39:52,961 --> 00:39:56,081
Speaker 5: every day. So it served a purpose. I'm not winging

844
00:39:56,081 --> 00:39:58,361
Speaker 5: about it because it helped me build a pretty awesome

845
00:39:58,361 --> 00:40:02,921
Speaker 5: company now. But I paid the price. And I got

846
00:40:02,961 --> 00:40:04,841
Speaker 5: to that point where I'm like, I need to make

847
00:40:04,881 --> 00:40:07,401
Speaker 5: some changes, but I'm so busy, I've got no time.

848
00:40:07,601 --> 00:40:10,681
Speaker 5: And I was on this mental I just became the

849
00:40:10,801 --> 00:40:15,641
Speaker 5: number one at what I did agent but dying inside.

850
00:40:15,721 --> 00:40:17,881
Speaker 5: So I was like, I need to make some changes.

851
00:40:17,961 --> 00:40:20,041
Speaker 5: I could feel it, otherwise I think I'm going to

852
00:40:20,081 --> 00:40:22,681
Speaker 5: get sick or something like. I could just feel that

853
00:40:22,881 --> 00:40:25,281
Speaker 5: my body just wasn't going to keep going. And so

854
00:40:25,361 --> 00:40:27,401
Speaker 5: I decided to just go to the gym and do

855
00:40:27,441 --> 00:40:29,481
Speaker 5: thirty minutes on the treadmill every day. That's all I

856
00:40:29,641 --> 00:40:32,721
Speaker 5: started with. And as that went on, and then I

857
00:40:33,481 --> 00:40:36,201
Speaker 5: post it every day just to keep myself accountable. As

858
00:40:36,241 --> 00:40:39,161
Speaker 5: that went on, I did thirty one minutes, which meant

859
00:40:39,241 --> 00:40:42,321
Speaker 5: just do something for yourself. Then I started training a

860
00:40:42,321 --> 00:40:44,161
Speaker 5: bit more and when I was in the doctors, sorry,

861
00:40:44,201 --> 00:40:45,801
Speaker 5: he said, I do you want me to prescribe as

862
00:40:45,801 --> 00:40:49,401
Speaker 5: some testosterone? And I said how much? And He's like,

863
00:40:49,921 --> 00:40:51,521
Speaker 5: not my one milla weeks.

864
00:40:51,921 --> 00:40:53,361
Speaker 4: I'm on the Primo program.

865
00:40:55,521 --> 00:40:57,401
Speaker 3: I get the one the one meal every two weeks.

866
00:40:57,401 --> 00:40:59,361
Speaker 3: But did you know that they've now changed the boxes.

867
00:40:59,441 --> 00:41:02,321
Speaker 3: You can't buy three at a time anymore. Really, Oh, yes,

868
00:41:02,401 --> 00:41:05,000
Speaker 3: they've seen the value one meal three load.

869
00:41:05,361 --> 00:41:08,321
Speaker 4: Fucking mate. Honestly, all about.

870
00:41:08,441 --> 00:41:11,081
Speaker 5: Down the testosterone route. And there's some good sports doctors

871
00:41:11,081 --> 00:41:13,361
Speaker 5: out there that are pretty good with stuff those ten

872
00:41:13,441 --> 00:41:16,401
Speaker 5: years ago. So I started testosterone and started all of

873
00:41:16,441 --> 00:41:19,561
Speaker 5: that and then slowly got into training again. Made a

874
00:41:19,561 --> 00:41:23,161
Speaker 5: bit of a mistake because my son, Logan, who killed

875
00:41:23,201 --> 00:41:27,121
Speaker 5: himself recently. I surfed with him every day, every day

876
00:41:27,161 --> 00:41:30,721
Speaker 5: since he was six years old, and so I stopped

877
00:41:30,721 --> 00:41:33,961
Speaker 5: surfing with him because he was like about eighteen by

878
00:41:34,001 --> 00:41:37,681
Speaker 5: this point, verging on a pro surfer. And then I

879
00:41:37,721 --> 00:41:40,561
Speaker 5: went training instead, and I think it really affected him.

880
00:41:41,041 --> 00:41:42,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, he lost his brother.

881
00:41:42,241 --> 00:41:44,601
Speaker 5: It was a bit of a mistake I made, so

882
00:41:44,681 --> 00:41:47,321
Speaker 5: I stopped surfing, but I didn't have in my brain

883
00:41:47,401 --> 00:41:48,881
Speaker 5: I was like, well, I'm going to do that or

884
00:41:48,961 --> 00:41:51,601
Speaker 5: that like. So I said to Log's uka surfing in

885
00:41:51,641 --> 00:41:53,841
Speaker 5: the morning. So we surf every morning together, and I

886
00:41:53,841 --> 00:41:55,961
Speaker 5: said to those you're right surfing on your own He's like, yeah, yeah,

887
00:41:56,081 --> 00:41:57,841
Speaker 5: and it sort of wise, but I don't think he

888
00:41:57,961 --> 00:42:00,601
Speaker 5: was anyway. It's just something that changed in his life.

889
00:42:00,961 --> 00:42:03,321
Speaker 5: And then I just went right down that path. And

890
00:42:03,321 --> 00:42:05,041
Speaker 5: then I was looking at my time as the year

891
00:42:05,201 --> 00:42:08,521
Speaker 5: went on, I was like, I have to actually get

892
00:42:08,521 --> 00:42:11,241
Speaker 5: a hold of my time and structure the life that's

893
00:42:11,241 --> 00:42:14,161
Speaker 5: going to make me happy. Anything short of that I'm

894
00:42:14,201 --> 00:42:16,161
Speaker 5: not prepared to do. So that's where I was like,

895
00:42:16,401 --> 00:42:19,361
Speaker 5: I'm my best in the morning, so nine to one,

896
00:42:19,561 --> 00:42:22,441
Speaker 5: that's where my brain is best, or any appointments I

897
00:42:22,481 --> 00:42:25,161
Speaker 5: need to do usually are in there, and then morning

898
00:42:25,241 --> 00:42:29,001
Speaker 5: routine training, the ARVO, and then night routine. I don't

899
00:42:29,001 --> 00:42:30,881
Speaker 5: want another divorce, so I've got to give the family

900
00:42:30,921 --> 00:42:34,361
Speaker 5: a bit of time. So I'm trying to. I'm making

901
00:42:34,401 --> 00:42:37,081
Speaker 5: all that work, and now I've got a really good day.

902
00:42:37,121 --> 00:42:37,241
Speaker 3: You know.

903
00:42:37,281 --> 00:42:39,321
Speaker 5: I get to bed at nine nine point thirty every night.

904
00:42:39,721 --> 00:42:42,201
Speaker 5: I ate two meals a day. I know a lot

905
00:42:42,201 --> 00:42:44,921
Speaker 5: about gut health. Now I've got some great nutritionis around me.

906
00:42:45,201 --> 00:42:47,281
Speaker 5: I've gone right down that rabbit hole and I'm probably

907
00:42:47,321 --> 00:42:49,881
Speaker 5: functioning the best I've ever functioned in my life.

908
00:42:50,561 --> 00:42:54,241
Speaker 3: I don't want to be in any way. Please tell

909
00:42:54,281 --> 00:42:58,281
Speaker 3: me to stop. But you just talked about a horrific

910
00:42:58,361 --> 00:43:01,361
Speaker 3: loss in your life. Yeah, some Mogan, and we weren't.

911
00:43:02,201 --> 00:43:03,841
Speaker 3: I don't want to go deep into that. That's something

912
00:43:03,881 --> 00:43:09,441
Speaker 3: here to respect. But how if I may ask, And

913
00:43:09,521 --> 00:43:12,041
Speaker 3: I did actually see that time.

914
00:43:12,241 --> 00:43:16,480
Speaker 4: I did watch your posts and I was.

915
00:43:17,241 --> 00:43:20,241
Speaker 3: I was absolutely affected in the way that it was triggering,

916
00:43:20,321 --> 00:43:22,601
Speaker 3: and as a dad, I felt for you. We didn't

917
00:43:22,601 --> 00:43:25,881
Speaker 3: know each other, and I just was like, wow, but

918
00:43:26,001 --> 00:43:31,441
Speaker 3: the way that you showed your emotion and came to

919
00:43:31,761 --> 00:43:36,721
Speaker 3: just I guess living now and accepting, how how did

920
00:43:36,761 --> 00:43:37,161
Speaker 3: you do that?

921
00:43:37,201 --> 00:43:38,881
Speaker 4: Matt If I made plan, it.

922
00:43:38,841 --> 00:43:42,361
Speaker 5: Was very it was very tricky. We stopped talking Logan

923
00:43:42,361 --> 00:43:45,561
Speaker 5: and I. So we, out of all the kids at

924
00:43:45,641 --> 00:43:47,561
Speaker 5: the time, Logan I were probably the closest because we

925
00:43:47,641 --> 00:43:48,401
Speaker 5: spent every day together.

926
00:43:48,481 --> 00:43:52,561
Speaker 4: So was he your second child out of it? Okay?

927
00:43:52,801 --> 00:43:55,361
Speaker 5: So what happened? Like I had three real young like

928
00:43:55,441 --> 00:43:57,321
Speaker 5: after the first two, I said to Koreana, I don't

929
00:43:57,321 --> 00:43:58,841
Speaker 5: have any more kids. We don't even get along. Don't

930
00:43:58,841 --> 00:44:01,481
Speaker 5: have more kids. And then so you literally felt pregnant,

931
00:44:01,521 --> 00:44:03,361
Speaker 5: like just straight away after that, she just you walked

932
00:44:03,361 --> 00:44:06,201
Speaker 5: past this, she fell pregnant, and then I was separated.

933
00:44:06,201 --> 00:44:08,681
Speaker 5: From Karina. I was like, I can't do this, Like

934
00:44:08,721 --> 00:44:11,000
Speaker 5: I was so young, I had so much. I hadn't

935
00:44:11,041 --> 00:44:13,440
Speaker 5: even dealt with myself. I didn't know that at the time.

936
00:44:14,081 --> 00:44:16,401
Speaker 5: So I moved out and I was moving in and out,

937
00:44:16,401 --> 00:44:17,921
Speaker 5: in and out, in and out, trying to make it work,

938
00:44:17,921 --> 00:44:20,841
Speaker 5: trying to not And about a year later, after she

939
00:44:20,881 --> 00:44:23,041
Speaker 5: fell pregnant the second time, I went on a vendor

940
00:44:24,041 --> 00:44:26,041
Speaker 5: and I rang it. The next day, I said come over,

941
00:44:26,921 --> 00:44:30,401
Speaker 5: and she came over and fell pregnant with Logan. So

942
00:44:30,841 --> 00:44:33,041
Speaker 5: I was starting to see someone else by this point,

943
00:44:33,161 --> 00:44:36,000
Speaker 5: and so she was pregnant, I was seeing somebody else.

944
00:44:36,841 --> 00:44:39,881
Speaker 5: Talk about a mess like ge and then Logan was born,

945
00:44:40,521 --> 00:44:43,681
Speaker 5: and I didn't really like For the first couple of years,

946
00:44:43,721 --> 00:44:46,721
Speaker 5: I wasn't really super attached because it was like just

947
00:44:46,921 --> 00:44:49,281
Speaker 5: my whole life is a mess everywhere, and I was

948
00:44:49,281 --> 00:44:51,921
Speaker 5: just trying to keep everyone running, you know, child support

949
00:44:52,001 --> 00:44:55,561
Speaker 5: and house and this and that anyway, building a business.

950
00:44:55,601 --> 00:44:58,801
Speaker 5: I was just like relentless. And because she came to

951
00:44:58,881 --> 00:45:01,361
Speaker 5: the office one day and she pulls up and she

952
00:45:01,401 --> 00:45:04,081
Speaker 5: goes come down. We got on pretty good, but we

953
00:45:04,201 --> 00:45:06,721
Speaker 5: just didn't at the same time. So there's a bit

954
00:45:06,801 --> 00:45:09,041
Speaker 5: volatiles and she shows me the pregnancy thing and I'm

955
00:45:09,041 --> 00:45:11,481
Speaker 5: like what does that mean? And she is I'm pregnant.

956
00:45:11,681 --> 00:45:15,921
Speaker 5: I'm like how and she's like well that night like

957
00:45:15,961 --> 00:45:19,440
Speaker 5: that one night, I'm like, nah, you're joking. There must

958
00:45:19,481 --> 00:45:21,641
Speaker 5: be somebody else's or something like this, and she's like

959
00:45:22,161 --> 00:45:25,761
Speaker 5: it's yours and I'm like gee. So anyway, Logs was born,

960
00:45:25,801 --> 00:45:29,361
Speaker 5: and then about three years in I was like, it's

961
00:45:29,401 --> 00:45:32,361
Speaker 5: such a cute little kid. And then I'd stop surfing

962
00:45:32,401 --> 00:45:35,521
Speaker 5: for about fifteen years and Shelley, my second wife, said

963
00:45:35,521 --> 00:45:37,960
Speaker 5: you should start surfing again, and I was thought about

964
00:45:37,961 --> 00:45:39,321
Speaker 5: it and thought about it. I said, I'm going to

965
00:45:39,361 --> 00:45:41,561
Speaker 5: be a real cook. Am I supposed to start surfing

966
00:45:41,721 --> 00:45:43,721
Speaker 5: because I was never amazing? But I was all right.

967
00:45:43,881 --> 00:45:46,761
Speaker 5: And then I used to go up the North Entrance

968
00:45:46,801 --> 00:45:49,281
Speaker 5: in the dark, five in the morning and just surf

969
00:45:49,321 --> 00:45:51,921
Speaker 5: on my own and teach myself again. But then Logan

970
00:45:51,921 --> 00:45:53,601
Speaker 5: got to about five years old and I took him

971
00:45:53,601 --> 00:45:54,881
Speaker 5: to the beach one day in the rock pool and

972
00:45:54,921 --> 00:45:57,761
Speaker 5: I saw him stand on the surfboard. I'm like, there's

973
00:45:57,801 --> 00:46:00,521
Speaker 5: something with this kid and this surfing and just a

974
00:46:00,521 --> 00:46:02,841
Speaker 5: little foam thing and pushing it it's the way he

975
00:46:02,881 --> 00:46:06,641
Speaker 5: stood anyway. So I started more and more, and then

976
00:46:06,681 --> 00:46:08,440
Speaker 5: as he got older, he was surfing in my back

977
00:46:08,481 --> 00:46:10,081
Speaker 5: and then you know, I'd take him out and for

978
00:46:10,121 --> 00:46:12,281
Speaker 5: three years I just wear flippers, and then taught him

979
00:46:12,281 --> 00:46:14,841
Speaker 5: out a surf. Yes, I was bobbing around one time

980
00:46:14,881 --> 00:46:17,841
Speaker 5: and it was winter freezing and I had slippers on

981
00:46:17,841 --> 00:46:19,561
Speaker 5: and knees surfing. It would have been I don't know six.

982
00:46:19,681 --> 00:46:22,321
Speaker 5: This time this guy paddles. He goes, mate, you need

983
00:46:22,361 --> 00:46:26,841
Speaker 5: a freaking trophy. He goes, you're bobbling around out here.

984
00:46:27,041 --> 00:46:29,081
Speaker 5: Surf is pretty big. He goes bobbing around out his

985
00:46:29,241 --> 00:46:32,321
Speaker 5: women in and out getting this kid. Anyway, Logan just

986
00:46:32,321 --> 00:46:34,881
Speaker 5: had something different about him with the surf. Ever, since

987
00:46:34,881 --> 00:46:37,801
Speaker 5: he was real young, mate, he was serving the biggest waves.

988
00:46:38,281 --> 00:46:41,281
Speaker 5: It was sketchy but probably bad parenting, but anyway, he

989
00:46:41,401 --> 00:46:44,561
Speaker 5: just had this talent that was like, well, everyone loved

990
00:46:44,561 --> 00:46:46,241
Speaker 5: watching him surfing in the power he had.

991
00:46:46,561 --> 00:46:49,281
Speaker 3: That's the first part of our conversation with Matt Steinwade.

992
00:46:49,361 --> 00:46:52,361
Speaker 3: In part two will dive deeper into his journey as

993
00:46:52,401 --> 00:46:55,201
Speaker 3: a father, the heartbreaking loss of his son, and how

994
00:46:55,241 --> 00:46:57,241
Speaker 3: he rebuilt his life with purpose.

995
00:46:57,921 --> 00:47:01,361
Speaker 4: That's coming next. Week. Don't miss it fort a record.

996
00:47:01,561 --> 00:47:04,641
Speaker 1: Don't try and make you out comfortable for a record,

997
00:47:05,081 --> 00:47:06,241
Speaker 1: trying to grow down the stuff for you.

998
00:47:06,961 --> 00:47:09,281
Speaker 2: Right for the record, live on me, going all the

999
00:47:09,321 --> 00:47:11,241
Speaker 2: way for the record.

1000
00:47:11,361 --> 00:47:13,601
Speaker 1: Ain't trying to link, no, trying to waste, stop.

1001
00:47:13,521 --> 00:47:17,281
Speaker 2: All that for the record, for the record. Yeah for

1002
00:47:17,361 --> 00:47:22,681
Speaker 2: the for the record, for the record. Yea for the record,

1003
00:47:23,681 --> 00:47:24,321
Speaker 2: for the record.

1004
00:47:31,001 --> 00:47:37,361
Speaker 5: H m hmmmm hmm