1 00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:03,920 Speaker 1: This podcast is recorded on gadigal Land Always was, always 2 00:00:03,920 --> 00:00:09,320 Speaker 1: will be Aboriginal Land. 3 00:00:12,560 --> 00:00:14,640 Speaker 2: Hey Jicks, I'm zal and I'm out and this is 4 00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:16,520 Speaker 2: two Broke Chicks to show that shares life lessons and 5 00:00:16,560 --> 00:00:19,640 Speaker 2: tips to help make you rich in life. And today 6 00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:24,960 Speaker 2: we are in for a juicy episode of Dilemmas from 7 00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:29,040 Speaker 2: the Chicks and we've got a very special guest with us, 8 00:00:29,200 --> 00:00:29,840 Speaker 2: Mitch Jury. 9 00:00:29,920 --> 00:00:34,640 Speaker 3: Oh my god, I the third broke Chees. Finally, Hey Chicks, 10 00:00:34,640 --> 00:00:35,040 Speaker 3: I'm Mitch. 11 00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:39,040 Speaker 4: Mitch. It has a ring to it. 12 00:00:39,560 --> 00:00:40,839 Speaker 1: No, no more radio for you. 13 00:00:43,640 --> 00:00:46,680 Speaker 3: Into my brain. Radio God, would you guys ever do 14 00:00:46,760 --> 00:00:48,400 Speaker 3: radio if you had offers from radio networks? 15 00:00:48,440 --> 00:00:51,519 Speaker 1: Sure, we've definitely chatted about it, but like, I just 16 00:00:51,600 --> 00:00:55,000 Speaker 1: have this fear rooted inside of me that like I 17 00:00:55,040 --> 00:00:56,840 Speaker 1: just don't have a filter, that I don't think i'd 18 00:00:56,840 --> 00:01:01,200 Speaker 1: be good at it. And there's also a se is 19 00:01:01,200 --> 00:01:03,600 Speaker 1: it seven or seventy seven seven? 20 00:01:03,640 --> 00:01:06,160 Speaker 3: So you don't know, you don't actually by the time, 21 00:01:06,560 --> 00:01:09,720 Speaker 3: the producer's job to be like yes, or if pressure 22 00:01:09,760 --> 00:01:11,360 Speaker 3: on buttons, like I would press my own button, so 23 00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:13,400 Speaker 3: I would be fine because I'd be like fuck, oh shit, 24 00:01:13,600 --> 00:01:15,560 Speaker 3: But then you'd like double fuck because you'd say yeah, 25 00:01:15,600 --> 00:01:16,760 Speaker 3: and then you have to double back, so then you 26 00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:18,640 Speaker 3: have to press the button. But then once you press 27 00:01:18,680 --> 00:01:21,080 Speaker 3: that button, it cuts that delay. So you're live live, 28 00:01:21,440 --> 00:01:23,920 Speaker 3: so you can you have to like tiptoe. 29 00:01:23,920 --> 00:01:26,679 Speaker 1: Or walk on till you remake back the seven seconds. 30 00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:28,240 Speaker 3: Yes, and then you go into a song and there's 31 00:01:28,240 --> 00:01:31,679 Speaker 3: a magic button you press that slows the song down microscopically, 32 00:01:32,080 --> 00:01:34,560 Speaker 3: and over the length of the song, it actually builds 33 00:01:34,640 --> 00:01:36,520 Speaker 3: up seven seconds. It's crazy science. 34 00:01:36,720 --> 00:01:40,600 Speaker 4: Wow. I love this. I love this Insider t Yeah, 35 00:01:40,600 --> 00:01:41,800 Speaker 4: but no radio, no more. 36 00:01:41,840 --> 00:01:43,880 Speaker 3: Now my podcast, baby. 37 00:01:44,120 --> 00:01:47,560 Speaker 1: Yes, because like you, I'm just like you, you just 38 00:01:47,680 --> 00:01:47,960 Speaker 1: like me. 39 00:01:48,280 --> 00:01:48,560 Speaker 3: Yeah. 40 00:01:48,600 --> 00:01:52,080 Speaker 2: Because in the last week you have launched the Mitch 41 00:01:52,160 --> 00:01:53,120 Speaker 2: Jury Chat Show. 42 00:01:53,200 --> 00:01:54,680 Speaker 4: I have congratulations. 43 00:01:54,680 --> 00:01:56,440 Speaker 3: Thank you so much. It's a lot. Yes, I feel 44 00:01:56,480 --> 00:01:58,280 Speaker 3: like I'm the first person to ever start a podcast. 45 00:01:58,440 --> 00:01:59,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree. 46 00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:01,640 Speaker 2: But for the chicks I haven't listened yet, give us 47 00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:03,320 Speaker 2: a rundown of the Mitch Cherry Chat. 48 00:02:03,360 --> 00:02:04,920 Speaker 3: All right, So the Mitch Cheery Chat Show. I've been 49 00:02:04,960 --> 00:02:07,240 Speaker 3: describing it like call her Daddy meets Graham Norton. So 50 00:02:07,320 --> 00:02:10,480 Speaker 3: I love chat shows, late night, I love Conan Letterman, 51 00:02:10,600 --> 00:02:13,440 Speaker 3: Rove Live. I grew up on that stuff. And I've 52 00:02:13,440 --> 00:02:15,120 Speaker 3: been in radio for so long, and I've interviewed so 53 00:02:15,120 --> 00:02:17,760 Speaker 3: many pop stars and actors and comedians, and I love 54 00:02:17,840 --> 00:02:20,640 Speaker 3: that part of my job. But the nature of radio 55 00:02:20,720 --> 00:02:22,440 Speaker 3: is you'd get a six minute slot or a nine 56 00:02:22,440 --> 00:02:24,200 Speaker 3: minute slot, and then you'd edit it down to three 57 00:02:24,240 --> 00:02:26,160 Speaker 3: or four minutes. Then you'd play a song, another song, 58 00:02:26,320 --> 00:02:28,320 Speaker 3: six minutes of ads, and then you play another four 59 00:02:28,320 --> 00:02:30,840 Speaker 3: minute chunk. And it was so informal. And then the 60 00:02:30,919 --> 00:02:33,640 Speaker 3: content that I was watching was the Alex Coopers and 61 00:02:33,680 --> 00:02:36,160 Speaker 3: shows like you guys in long form content. So I'm like, 62 00:02:36,160 --> 00:02:37,760 Speaker 3: why don't I have to make it myself? And there's 63 00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:39,560 Speaker 3: also a gap in the Aussie market, like there is 64 00:02:39,680 --> 00:02:42,760 Speaker 3: no real chat show in this country. It's crazy when 65 00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:44,880 Speaker 3: you think about it. The project was the only destination 66 00:02:44,919 --> 00:02:46,400 Speaker 3: on Channel ten that's gone. 67 00:02:46,720 --> 00:02:47,440 Speaker 1: There's no Rove. 68 00:02:47,880 --> 00:02:49,920 Speaker 3: So this is my little way of making it and 69 00:02:49,919 --> 00:02:52,280 Speaker 3: doing notes to the format. Yeah, we're a little a tie. 70 00:02:52,280 --> 00:02:54,240 Speaker 3: I've got a chat show desk, We've built a set. 71 00:02:54,360 --> 00:02:57,240 Speaker 3: I have a door that guests can come in and 72 00:02:57,280 --> 00:03:00,440 Speaker 3: out of a faux door. It's so stupid to kick 73 00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:00,760 Speaker 3: it in. 74 00:03:00,880 --> 00:03:06,240 Speaker 2: Yeah, so you chick sent in your diabolical dilemmas and 75 00:03:06,400 --> 00:03:08,520 Speaker 2: we thought who better to get on to help give 76 00:03:08,720 --> 00:03:12,960 Speaker 2: another perspective. But you, Mitch, because you've interviewed everyone, You've 77 00:03:13,000 --> 00:03:16,520 Speaker 2: had conversations with, like everyone you could imagine, and so 78 00:03:16,560 --> 00:03:17,959 Speaker 2: I feel like you're going to be able to give 79 00:03:18,160 --> 00:03:20,079 Speaker 2: a really good, fresh perspective. 80 00:03:19,560 --> 00:03:20,720 Speaker 4: On some of these dilemmas. 81 00:03:20,760 --> 00:03:23,280 Speaker 3: But I'm ready, But you're ready to chat? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I. 82 00:03:23,360 --> 00:03:24,360 Speaker 4: Mean that's what you do. 83 00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:26,120 Speaker 2: But before we get into it, we like to start 84 00:03:26,160 --> 00:03:28,400 Speaker 2: with a life lesson of the week, so it can 85 00:03:28,440 --> 00:03:30,960 Speaker 2: be silly, serious, whatever you like. 86 00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:32,359 Speaker 4: But would you like to kick us off? 87 00:03:32,400 --> 00:03:33,919 Speaker 3: Oh yeah, okay, so my life lesson? 88 00:03:34,040 --> 00:03:34,239 Speaker 5: Right? 89 00:03:34,320 --> 00:03:36,440 Speaker 3: Okay, I learned this week that I should not skip 90 00:03:36,440 --> 00:03:40,400 Speaker 3: my fiber because I did and I was backed up 91 00:03:40,440 --> 00:03:42,080 Speaker 3: and we were talking about this before the mics went on. 92 00:03:43,080 --> 00:03:48,720 Speaker 3: I'm such a smoothie boy and I need to have 93 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:51,880 Speaker 3: my fiber in it and I have. Okay, here's the hack. 94 00:03:51,920 --> 00:03:53,840 Speaker 3: Do you want the combo You've got a witches You'll 95 00:03:53,840 --> 00:03:57,080 Speaker 3: love this hubble bubble toy of trouble. So I do 96 00:03:57,120 --> 00:03:59,920 Speaker 3: my little smoothie every morning. It's protein powder too, scoops. 97 00:04:00,160 --> 00:04:04,120 Speaker 3: Then I do soluble fiber. That's the hack. Benefiber, which 98 00:04:04,160 --> 00:04:06,520 Speaker 3: melts away. But then you add cilium husk, which is 99 00:04:06,560 --> 00:04:10,320 Speaker 3: like it's like jelly, it's like bird seed trill, like 100 00:04:10,360 --> 00:04:13,920 Speaker 3: I feel like a finch. And then and then add 101 00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:15,640 Speaker 3: the fiber, and then you add a scuba chea seeds 102 00:04:16,080 --> 00:04:17,040 Speaker 3: and that concoction. 103 00:04:17,240 --> 00:04:18,760 Speaker 1: And what does that taste like. 104 00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:21,440 Speaker 3: Mitch, you can't taste it. That's the benefit. 105 00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:22,000 Speaker 4: You're alive. 106 00:04:22,120 --> 00:04:28,080 Speaker 3: No way that tastes good. 107 00:04:28,440 --> 00:04:30,080 Speaker 4: Okay, what's your life now? My life? 108 00:04:30,160 --> 00:04:33,320 Speaker 1: Lesson of the week is Okay, everyone knows that I 109 00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:37,279 Speaker 1: am the biggest fan of The Vampire Diaries. Oh yes, 110 00:04:37,640 --> 00:04:41,560 Speaker 1: And this week Nina do Brev, who plays Elena or 111 00:04:41,560 --> 00:04:44,680 Speaker 1: who played Elana on The Vampire Diaries, revealed that she 112 00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:48,080 Speaker 1: quit the show due to a pay gap with Ian 113 00:04:48,160 --> 00:04:51,840 Speaker 1: Summer Holders and Paul Wesley, who played Stephan and Damon, 114 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:54,800 Speaker 1: and they were paid more than she was. I know. 115 00:04:55,120 --> 00:04:55,320 Speaker 3: So. 116 00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:59,080 Speaker 1: Nina do Brev said that Candice King, Kat Graham, and 117 00:04:59,120 --> 00:05:02,120 Speaker 1: I were the three lowest paid series regulars in the 118 00:05:02,160 --> 00:05:06,280 Speaker 1: first two seasons. She points out that although her contract 119 00:05:06,320 --> 00:05:11,279 Speaker 1: specified only playing Elena, she actually played multiple characters like Catherine, 120 00:05:11,640 --> 00:05:14,680 Speaker 1: which doubled her workload and she had to be on 121 00:05:14,720 --> 00:05:18,080 Speaker 1: set for double the amount of time and memorized double 122 00:05:18,120 --> 00:05:21,760 Speaker 1: the amount of lines. I wanted to play Catherine, but 123 00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:24,120 Speaker 1: I wanted to be compensated fairly for that and I 124 00:05:24,160 --> 00:05:27,520 Speaker 1: wanted to be equal to the boys. Ultimately, she never 125 00:05:27,600 --> 00:05:32,280 Speaker 1: received full pay. Parody with Ian Summerholder and Paul Wesley, that's. 126 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:35,320 Speaker 2: So far because she's one of the main characters of 127 00:05:35,320 --> 00:05:36,320 Speaker 2: that show, is. 128 00:05:36,240 --> 00:05:39,440 Speaker 4: The main like the three of their mother, it follows. 129 00:05:39,120 --> 00:05:43,440 Speaker 2: It, She's the point in their love triangle. 130 00:05:43,600 --> 00:05:47,000 Speaker 1: And so basically they then ended up killing off Catherine, 131 00:05:47,040 --> 00:05:50,480 Speaker 1: which was one of the characters she played, because they 132 00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:53,400 Speaker 1: didn't want to pay her more. Wow, and she left 133 00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:55,560 Speaker 1: the show at the end of season six, but she 134 00:05:55,640 --> 00:05:58,720 Speaker 1: returned for the finale, which sucked her and she did Yeah, well, 135 00:05:58,920 --> 00:06:02,880 Speaker 1: so Elena her character, the main character. They ended up 136 00:06:02,920 --> 00:06:07,279 Speaker 1: writing her off by putting her into like a comaye 137 00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:11,119 Speaker 1: so that like, if she wanted to come back, she could. 138 00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:14,839 Speaker 1: But when I saw that, I was flabbergasted because I 139 00:06:14,880 --> 00:06:16,440 Speaker 1: was like, don't ever try and tell me that the 140 00:06:16,440 --> 00:06:17,720 Speaker 1: gender pay gap doesn't exist. 141 00:06:17,880 --> 00:06:23,159 Speaker 3: Yeah, literally, also on a show as big as that, Like, yeah, 142 00:06:23,240 --> 00:06:24,200 Speaker 3: that's shocking. 143 00:06:23,960 --> 00:06:26,760 Speaker 1: And she like there's more details to it, saying that 144 00:06:26,800 --> 00:06:30,240 Speaker 1: you know you normally can't renegotiate your contract until like 145 00:06:30,279 --> 00:06:32,400 Speaker 1: the third season or things like that, And that's what 146 00:06:32,480 --> 00:06:37,400 Speaker 1: those was. But she still never achieved that like equal pay. 147 00:06:37,920 --> 00:06:40,880 Speaker 2: I was like, but the thing is that she should 148 00:06:40,880 --> 00:06:42,479 Speaker 2: have not been getting equal pay. 149 00:06:42,560 --> 00:06:44,560 Speaker 4: She should have been getting paid more than that. 150 00:06:44,560 --> 00:06:45,120 Speaker 1: That's the tea. 151 00:06:45,279 --> 00:06:48,599 Speaker 2: That is the tea juicy and disappointing. My life lesson 152 00:06:48,680 --> 00:06:51,440 Speaker 2: switching gears is a wholesome one. And it's something that 153 00:06:51,520 --> 00:06:54,839 Speaker 2: I learned this week called collective effer vescence. 154 00:06:55,839 --> 00:06:56,560 Speaker 4: Have you heard of this? 155 00:06:56,720 --> 00:06:59,480 Speaker 1: Nobody? I really like the word vesce. 156 00:06:59,160 --> 00:07:02,800 Speaker 4: Like ama I met yeah, bubbles, why not? 157 00:07:03,600 --> 00:07:03,680 Speaker 3: So. 158 00:07:04,400 --> 00:07:09,640 Speaker 2: It's a sociological concept first defined by Emil Durkheim, but 159 00:07:09,880 --> 00:07:12,960 Speaker 2: it refers to the intense emotional energy and sense of 160 00:07:13,080 --> 00:07:16,280 Speaker 2: unity experience when a group of people participate in a 161 00:07:16,320 --> 00:07:19,840 Speaker 2: shared event or ritual. So you know when you're at 162 00:07:19,840 --> 00:07:23,680 Speaker 2: a concert and everybody's like swaying their arms together all 163 00:07:23,800 --> 00:07:26,480 Speaker 2: like at your podcast launch and we all had our 164 00:07:26,560 --> 00:07:30,280 Speaker 2: phones out for your Coldplay moment, or like if you're 165 00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:32,680 Speaker 2: at a parade and you're like watching something with a 166 00:07:33,720 --> 00:07:33,960 Speaker 2: like a. 167 00:07:33,920 --> 00:07:38,560 Speaker 5: Concert like radio gager Yes Goo go yes, and that 168 00:07:38,720 --> 00:07:42,400 Speaker 5: intense emotional feeling and you get like goose bumps, and 169 00:07:42,440 --> 00:07:45,720 Speaker 5: you feel connected with people who you've never met and 170 00:07:45,760 --> 00:07:47,040 Speaker 5: you don't know it, and you might not even be 171 00:07:47,080 --> 00:07:48,960 Speaker 5: able to see them because you're in a huge stadium. 172 00:07:49,480 --> 00:07:52,680 Speaker 2: I was like, that is so beautiful, and it's one 173 00:07:52,680 --> 00:07:54,800 Speaker 2: of those things that in the moment you're like, oh, 174 00:07:54,840 --> 00:07:57,440 Speaker 2: like it's such like a sense of euphoria. 175 00:07:57,520 --> 00:08:00,440 Speaker 4: But like, I never knew that it had a term 176 00:08:00,520 --> 00:08:00,960 Speaker 4: for it. 177 00:08:01,080 --> 00:08:04,440 Speaker 2: And sometimes I find that if I can pinpoint a 178 00:08:04,560 --> 00:08:07,200 Speaker 2: term or a phrase on a feeling like that, it 179 00:08:07,360 --> 00:08:10,080 Speaker 2: helps me be more present, because as I'm feeling it, 180 00:08:10,120 --> 00:08:10,720 Speaker 2: I'm gonna be. 181 00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:12,040 Speaker 4: Like, oh my god, like this is it? 182 00:08:13,920 --> 00:08:18,840 Speaker 2: Collect But yes, I thought that was a nice, lit, 183 00:08:18,840 --> 00:08:27,720 Speaker 2: wholesome one. So should we get into our dilemmas. 184 00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:32,600 Speaker 1: Our dilemma Number one scream worthy friend of a decade 185 00:08:32,600 --> 00:08:35,680 Speaker 1: ditching my wedding. There's always a wedding. 186 00:08:36,240 --> 00:08:37,280 Speaker 4: There's always a wedding. 187 00:08:37,400 --> 00:08:40,960 Speaker 1: Let's go okay, Hey, Garlely would love to hear your 188 00:08:40,960 --> 00:08:43,840 Speaker 1: thoughts on this. My friend of a decade, uni together, 189 00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:48,680 Speaker 1: traveled overseas and interstate, multiple trips together, lived together, has 190 00:08:48,760 --> 00:08:52,520 Speaker 1: decided not to come to my wedding. I've been with 191 00:08:52,559 --> 00:08:54,920 Speaker 1: my partner for seven years, and our wedding is coming 192 00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:57,480 Speaker 1: up next year. She was one of the first few 193 00:08:57,520 --> 00:08:59,520 Speaker 1: to find out we were engaged and one of the 194 00:08:59,520 --> 00:09:02,960 Speaker 1: first receive her save the date in aprox. Six months 195 00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:07,520 Speaker 1: ago in person approximately six months ago. She knows I'm 196 00:09:07,559 --> 00:09:09,880 Speaker 1: a bit of a fairytale kind of girl who has 197 00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:13,160 Speaker 1: always daydreamed about my wedding and knows it's an important 198 00:09:13,160 --> 00:09:15,959 Speaker 1: thing to me. To my knowledge, she has no issue 199 00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:18,960 Speaker 1: with my partner, angel of a man by all reports 200 00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:22,040 Speaker 1: and well loved by her also as our resident handyman 201 00:09:22,200 --> 00:09:24,480 Speaker 1: boy energy for our girl house. Back in the day, 202 00:09:25,080 --> 00:09:27,800 Speaker 1: I heard via my maid of honor that she couldn't 203 00:09:27,840 --> 00:09:30,360 Speaker 1: make my hens as she is returning from a trip 204 00:09:30,440 --> 00:09:34,280 Speaker 1: for her new boyfriend's thirtieth day off where in different 205 00:09:34,320 --> 00:09:37,400 Speaker 1: states could come the next day. But totally understand shit 206 00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:41,880 Speaker 1: is expensive, etc. I can, of course forgive the hens 207 00:09:42,120 --> 00:09:46,520 Speaker 1: not an issue. I recently got a long text describing 208 00:09:46,559 --> 00:09:49,160 Speaker 1: a clash of dates. She is off on a holiday 209 00:09:49,160 --> 00:09:51,160 Speaker 1: with now Boo to a country she has been to 210 00:09:51,240 --> 00:09:54,160 Speaker 1: at least four times, one of these occasions with me. 211 00:09:54,760 --> 00:09:57,360 Speaker 1: She has obviously had to book leave and flights, etc. 212 00:09:57,679 --> 00:10:01,400 Speaker 1: For this trip. Hence acknowledging the date of said trip. 213 00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:04,200 Speaker 1: I reiterate she has had my save the date for 214 00:10:04,280 --> 00:10:07,920 Speaker 1: six months, very much preceding the planning of this trip. 215 00:10:08,480 --> 00:10:10,960 Speaker 1: She says she's sad to miss my day, but will 216 00:10:10,960 --> 00:10:14,720 Speaker 1: be thinking of me. I was super upset at the time, 217 00:10:14,840 --> 00:10:17,600 Speaker 1: feeling like a close friend had basically just said fuck 218 00:10:17,640 --> 00:10:20,040 Speaker 1: you to our years of friendship. And I feel that 219 00:10:20,080 --> 00:10:22,360 Speaker 1: some things you just need to show up for your friends. 220 00:10:22,840 --> 00:10:25,520 Speaker 1: I know I will feel her absence on the day too. 221 00:10:26,240 --> 00:10:29,400 Speaker 1: She didn't really leave any leeway for a potential change 222 00:10:29,440 --> 00:10:32,040 Speaker 1: of holiday dates, any plan to meet in the middle. 223 00:10:32,360 --> 00:10:35,440 Speaker 1: She also offered me space and basically shut the whole 224 00:10:35,480 --> 00:10:39,240 Speaker 1: thing down. And we haven't spoken since we deaf aren't 225 00:10:39,240 --> 00:10:41,559 Speaker 1: as close as we were when we lived together, and 226 00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:44,280 Speaker 1: in being in different states always makes it harder. But 227 00:10:44,320 --> 00:10:47,000 Speaker 1: I will always consider her a close friend. I guess 228 00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:49,120 Speaker 1: I just feel a bit at a loss. Is this 229 00:10:49,200 --> 00:10:52,560 Speaker 1: a friendship over moment? Is that being dramatic over a 230 00:10:52,640 --> 00:10:55,959 Speaker 1: day that is, of course more important to me than anyone. 231 00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:58,319 Speaker 1: Is there an acceptable path to reconciliation? 232 00:10:58,800 --> 00:10:59,680 Speaker 3: Help me? Oh? 233 00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:02,040 Speaker 4: Oh my god, oh my god. 234 00:11:02,320 --> 00:11:05,600 Speaker 2: First things first, I will say, and I will also 235 00:11:05,600 --> 00:11:07,760 Speaker 2: acknowledge that we do typically tend to have a bias 236 00:11:07,840 --> 00:11:10,480 Speaker 2: towards a person that's riding in because you do. 237 00:11:10,400 --> 00:11:11,680 Speaker 4: Get their perspective. 238 00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:15,080 Speaker 2: But she does sound very self aware, like the fact 239 00:11:15,120 --> 00:11:17,480 Speaker 2: that she's addressed that I know that my wedding day 240 00:11:17,760 --> 00:11:20,520 Speaker 2: is the most important day to me. It's not necessarily 241 00:11:20,520 --> 00:11:24,199 Speaker 2: as important to everybody else. Also, I have been daydreaming 242 00:11:24,200 --> 00:11:26,560 Speaker 2: of my wedding. It's important to me. 243 00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:30,000 Speaker 4: And that she was didn't like, kick up a stink 244 00:11:30,000 --> 00:11:30,560 Speaker 4: about the hand. 245 00:11:30,640 --> 00:11:33,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, because that's the first thing at the start when 246 00:11:33,040 --> 00:11:35,679 Speaker 1: she said I've always wanted a fairy tale wedding and 247 00:11:35,720 --> 00:11:37,360 Speaker 1: it's always been my dream and the most important day 248 00:11:37,400 --> 00:11:38,840 Speaker 1: to me, I was like, that can sometimes show up 249 00:11:38,840 --> 00:11:41,839 Speaker 1: as red flack, yeah, because I'm like But then she 250 00:11:42,320 --> 00:11:45,480 Speaker 1: saved herself when she went, I know it's only important 251 00:11:45,520 --> 00:11:47,959 Speaker 1: to me. Yeah, like that more to me than anyone else. 252 00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:49,360 Speaker 3: But what do you think, I don't know, you know 253 00:11:49,400 --> 00:11:51,520 Speaker 3: what I was thinking. The point that stuck out to 254 00:11:51,559 --> 00:11:53,439 Speaker 3: me is when she said she doesn't have a problem 255 00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:55,520 Speaker 3: with my partner. But do you think maybe she's one 256 00:11:55,520 --> 00:11:58,000 Speaker 3: of those people that don't see that a lot of 257 00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:00,800 Speaker 3: their friends don't actually like their partner. That friend who 258 00:12:00,840 --> 00:12:03,560 Speaker 3: has a partner that we really can't stand or just 259 00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:06,280 Speaker 3: don't like for whatever reason, but we're so polite we 260 00:12:06,320 --> 00:12:09,160 Speaker 3: don't say anything. Yeah, and that partner always says, no 261 00:12:09,200 --> 00:12:11,400 Speaker 3: one has a problem with Brian, and everyone loves Brian. Brian. 262 00:12:11,559 --> 00:12:13,679 Speaker 3: It's like, no one fucking likes Brian. So I wonder 263 00:12:13,720 --> 00:12:16,360 Speaker 3: if she's got a Brian, And maybe that's it, because 264 00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:19,280 Speaker 3: I can't otherwise. The only option is that that they've 265 00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:21,840 Speaker 3: fallen out of friendship and maybe she is still as 266 00:12:21,840 --> 00:12:25,280 Speaker 3: connected more connected. I mean, there's no other option. Really. 267 00:12:25,400 --> 00:12:27,280 Speaker 1: That's the thing is, like I have a best friend 268 00:12:27,360 --> 00:12:31,520 Speaker 1: that lives into state, right and she's getting married in 269 00:12:31,520 --> 00:12:35,960 Speaker 1: the next year, and there is no way in hell 270 00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:40,000 Speaker 1: that I would book an overseas trip on the date 271 00:12:40,040 --> 00:12:40,600 Speaker 1: of her wedding. 272 00:12:40,800 --> 00:12:41,920 Speaker 4: Yeah, like there is. 273 00:12:42,160 --> 00:12:45,480 Speaker 2: Yeah, I think unless like the partner had done something 274 00:12:46,240 --> 00:12:48,960 Speaker 2: to you where you have had like some sort of 275 00:12:49,040 --> 00:12:52,520 Speaker 2: issue together or you know, maybe I can also understand 276 00:12:52,520 --> 00:12:57,520 Speaker 2: if like the partners like doesn't treat you know, your friend, well, yes, yeah, 277 00:12:57,559 --> 00:12:59,199 Speaker 2: and you're like, well, I don't want to go because 278 00:12:59,240 --> 00:13:00,840 Speaker 2: I don't want to be saying that I am. 279 00:13:00,800 --> 00:13:03,360 Speaker 4: Like condoning this union. Like I could understand that, but 280 00:13:03,480 --> 00:13:04,120 Speaker 4: I don't. 281 00:13:03,880 --> 00:13:06,880 Speaker 1: Think it's anyone's position to be condoning anything. 282 00:13:10,120 --> 00:13:12,840 Speaker 3: And to support your friends, yes, but also relationships are 283 00:13:12,880 --> 00:13:15,720 Speaker 3: this huge sum of so many moments with a couple, 284 00:13:16,040 --> 00:13:19,160 Speaker 3: and friends only really get these micro moments. We don't 285 00:13:19,200 --> 00:13:20,760 Speaker 3: know how deeply in love they are. That we're there 286 00:13:20,760 --> 00:13:22,960 Speaker 3: to celebrate their moment and you're there to celebrate the 287 00:13:22,960 --> 00:13:25,640 Speaker 3: connection that you have. So I think it's a dog 288 00:13:25,679 --> 00:13:28,480 Speaker 3: act for sure. If it was a destination wedding, different. 289 00:13:28,240 --> 00:13:33,440 Speaker 2: Difference, or even if the holiday was pre booked prior 290 00:13:33,520 --> 00:13:36,560 Speaker 2: to the holiday was already booked, then I would understand. 291 00:13:36,600 --> 00:13:38,280 Speaker 2: But even then I would be like, Okay, well, what 292 00:13:38,320 --> 00:13:40,760 Speaker 2: can I do here? Can I bring forward dates? Can 293 00:13:40,800 --> 00:13:43,319 Speaker 2: I shift? Can I move? Can I do something to 294 00:13:43,400 --> 00:13:45,439 Speaker 2: try to make it work? But it just doesn't sound 295 00:13:45,480 --> 00:13:49,000 Speaker 2: like she's well she said she didn't offer anything to 296 00:13:49,000 --> 00:13:50,080 Speaker 2: try and meet in the middle. 297 00:13:50,280 --> 00:13:53,120 Speaker 3: Yeah, but also go to the wedding like wedding. 298 00:13:53,240 --> 00:13:57,800 Speaker 1: Her saying I'm going to give you space is odd. 299 00:13:58,160 --> 00:14:00,800 Speaker 4: She also sent this over text, Oh yeah, that's good. 300 00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:01,360 Speaker 3: That's brutal. 301 00:14:01,480 --> 00:14:03,760 Speaker 1: So I feel like she's just like I thing happened 302 00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:08,600 Speaker 1: that maybe this chick that's writing in has missed because 303 00:14:08,640 --> 00:14:11,080 Speaker 1: you know how sometimes like a friend can be upset 304 00:14:11,080 --> 00:14:13,520 Speaker 1: about something and they haven't said anything, and then you're 305 00:14:13,640 --> 00:14:15,559 Speaker 1: kind of living in la la land where you think 306 00:14:15,600 --> 00:14:20,880 Speaker 1: everything's all gravy baby, and because like if that was me, 307 00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:24,120 Speaker 1: which never would be, but if that was me, I 308 00:14:24,160 --> 00:14:26,520 Speaker 1: would be so scared of this friend being mad at 309 00:14:26,560 --> 00:14:29,160 Speaker 1: me that I would be like one saying it over 310 00:14:29,200 --> 00:14:30,760 Speaker 1: the phone. And I'm not giving anyone's space. I need 311 00:14:30,760 --> 00:14:32,720 Speaker 1: to reconcile if you're mad at me right now. Yeah, 312 00:14:32,760 --> 00:14:36,280 Speaker 1: So I'm like, I am curious to hear what you 313 00:14:36,320 --> 00:14:39,680 Speaker 1: guys would do, because it's very she doesn't want to 314 00:14:39,680 --> 00:14:43,040 Speaker 1: lose this friendship. So what's the next step. 315 00:14:43,480 --> 00:14:45,760 Speaker 3: Well, it's exhausting. It's your wedding. You can't worry about 316 00:14:45,760 --> 00:14:48,320 Speaker 3: this one friend that won come because that'll consume you. 317 00:14:48,400 --> 00:14:50,160 Speaker 3: It's your day. I think she has to move on. 318 00:14:50,200 --> 00:14:51,120 Speaker 3: There's no other choice. 319 00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:51,800 Speaker 4: I agree. 320 00:14:51,880 --> 00:14:56,720 Speaker 2: I think cut your losses with this particular circumstance and 321 00:14:56,840 --> 00:14:59,760 Speaker 2: leave that. But I think that after the wedding once 322 00:14:59,800 --> 00:15:03,240 Speaker 2: ever everything you know, you've had your special day, you 323 00:15:03,280 --> 00:15:05,320 Speaker 2: have your beautiful memories with the people who made the 324 00:15:05,320 --> 00:15:08,720 Speaker 2: effort to go. You can catch up with this friend 325 00:15:08,840 --> 00:15:11,240 Speaker 2: and potentially say like, I really wish that you could 326 00:15:11,240 --> 00:15:14,160 Speaker 2: have been there, But also I think that you probably 327 00:15:14,200 --> 00:15:16,080 Speaker 2: can't count on this friend. 328 00:15:15,960 --> 00:15:18,840 Speaker 4: To be that person that they were there for you when. 329 00:15:18,680 --> 00:15:21,360 Speaker 2: You live together. I think that chapter of your friendship 330 00:15:21,480 --> 00:15:23,800 Speaker 2: is over. I don't think you have to if you 331 00:15:23,840 --> 00:15:25,800 Speaker 2: still value this person and you still want to be 332 00:15:25,840 --> 00:15:28,760 Speaker 2: their friend, you don't have to end the friendship over this. 333 00:15:28,880 --> 00:15:32,200 Speaker 2: But I wouldn't be putting like going above and beyond 334 00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:33,040 Speaker 2: for this friendship? 335 00:15:33,240 --> 00:15:34,119 Speaker 4: Yeah anymore? 336 00:15:34,160 --> 00:15:38,040 Speaker 1: Am I naive to think that? Like, because I like, 337 00:15:38,240 --> 00:15:40,320 Speaker 1: I'm a very hard on my sleeve person and like 338 00:15:40,680 --> 00:15:43,760 Speaker 1: every emotion I feel, everyone else knows about it to 339 00:15:43,840 --> 00:15:48,080 Speaker 1: be like is there harm in like just being honest 340 00:15:48,120 --> 00:15:51,640 Speaker 1: and being like, I'm really disappointed. I really would have 341 00:15:51,720 --> 00:15:53,520 Speaker 1: loved you to be there. Is there any way you 342 00:15:53,520 --> 00:15:54,480 Speaker 1: can move? Oh? 343 00:15:54,560 --> 00:15:57,160 Speaker 3: That's hard, But what are you going to get from that? Like? 344 00:15:57,200 --> 00:15:58,520 Speaker 3: What will she get from that? Her at the wedding 345 00:15:58,520 --> 00:15:59,560 Speaker 3: and then she feels guilty that. 346 00:15:59,520 --> 00:16:02,520 Speaker 4: She's or you'd be like cool, I have to strong 347 00:16:02,640 --> 00:16:04,040 Speaker 4: arm you to be here, or. 348 00:16:03,960 --> 00:16:05,920 Speaker 3: The friend goes no, I'm going to BALI you know 349 00:16:06,400 --> 00:16:09,080 Speaker 3: that's worse, and then you hate her even more Yeah, 350 00:16:09,160 --> 00:16:10,160 Speaker 3: I don't think you can do that. 351 00:16:10,920 --> 00:16:15,160 Speaker 1: I think that like giving people the opportunity to make 352 00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:17,920 Speaker 1: the right choice, But then again, we also haven't heard 353 00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:21,120 Speaker 1: the other person's perspective of what's the right choice. Yeah. 354 00:16:21,120 --> 00:16:22,920 Speaker 3: But also I'm a firm believer in when people show 355 00:16:22,960 --> 00:16:25,400 Speaker 3: you who they are, believe them. You know, Like, I'm 356 00:16:25,400 --> 00:16:27,120 Speaker 3: not going to sit here, and I've spent I'm such 357 00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:29,280 Speaker 3: a people pleaser. I've spent so many years of my 358 00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:31,200 Speaker 3: life trying to please other people, even when they're in 359 00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:32,880 Speaker 3: the wrong. It's bad. I'm trying to get out of 360 00:16:32,920 --> 00:16:34,960 Speaker 3: this habit. So I don't think she should sit there 361 00:16:34,960 --> 00:16:37,160 Speaker 3: and beg and grovel and ask and beg for her 362 00:16:37,240 --> 00:16:38,920 Speaker 3: to come to her wedding. She's already told her how 363 00:16:38,960 --> 00:16:39,920 Speaker 3: she feels. She's clearly not. 364 00:16:40,560 --> 00:16:44,080 Speaker 2: She has made the choice and given her two opportunities 365 00:16:44,120 --> 00:16:46,840 Speaker 2: to show up and be part of her wedding, whether 366 00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:48,880 Speaker 2: it's via the hands or on the wedding day. 367 00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:51,120 Speaker 1: And also she found out via the maid of honor. 368 00:16:51,920 --> 00:16:54,560 Speaker 4: That's another thing that's brutal. 369 00:16:56,040 --> 00:16:57,920 Speaker 3: You don't need this going that's true. 370 00:16:57,680 --> 00:17:00,120 Speaker 1: And you know what, exactly what you said before. It 371 00:17:00,160 --> 00:17:02,680 Speaker 1: is your day, and there are always going to be 372 00:17:02,720 --> 00:17:05,280 Speaker 1: people that that you want your wedding that can't come 373 00:17:05,359 --> 00:17:08,280 Speaker 1: to your wedding. Yeah, and focus on the fact that 374 00:17:08,440 --> 00:17:10,360 Speaker 1: you know you're marrying the love of your life. 375 00:17:10,800 --> 00:17:14,040 Speaker 3: Yeah. Weddings a chaotic. I went to last dim Oh 376 00:17:14,040 --> 00:17:15,440 Speaker 3: my god. It was so and I was the MC 377 00:17:15,560 --> 00:17:16,320 Speaker 3: and it was so juicy. 378 00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:17,680 Speaker 4: Oh my god. 379 00:17:18,119 --> 00:17:20,480 Speaker 3: I love nothing more than being a wedding with no 380 00:17:20,560 --> 00:17:23,439 Speaker 3: steaks for me, like a friend, not like a sister 381 00:17:23,600 --> 00:17:25,439 Speaker 3: or a cousin. It's it's a wedding that has no 382 00:17:25,520 --> 00:17:27,439 Speaker 3: stakes for you. So the drama is pure. 383 00:17:27,800 --> 00:17:28,600 Speaker 4: It's entertainment. 384 00:17:28,640 --> 00:17:30,399 Speaker 3: I'm watching a show and stand I'm like, this is 385 00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:33,679 Speaker 3: for me. This is so entertaining. I love like the 386 00:17:33,760 --> 00:17:35,760 Speaker 3: dynamics and a divorced family and then and sometimes an 387 00:17:35,800 --> 00:17:38,320 Speaker 3: excess there and I'm like, why the exit with a 388 00:17:38,359 --> 00:17:40,560 Speaker 3: new partner? Like I live for wedding drama. 389 00:17:41,119 --> 00:17:43,639 Speaker 2: It's so juicy and everybody looks so fabulous, which I. 390 00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:51,119 Speaker 1: So good. Okay, Well, best wishes, chickah. 391 00:17:50,520 --> 00:17:54,439 Speaker 2: And have a beautiful wedding day, Like take it in, 392 00:17:54,760 --> 00:17:57,320 Speaker 2: leave this drama behind you, and just soak in all 393 00:17:57,400 --> 00:18:00,680 Speaker 2: of the other beautiful people and relationships that you're around you. 394 00:18:00,760 --> 00:18:05,359 Speaker 2: All right, Okay, hit me next dilemma. Hey, Chikis and 395 00:18:05,440 --> 00:18:08,880 Speaker 2: Mitchy firstly want to say love the pod and also 396 00:18:08,880 --> 00:18:10,040 Speaker 2: can't wait for the live show. 397 00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:11,560 Speaker 4: We always laugh that we. 398 00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:14,240 Speaker 2: Still include those parts. They're not essential to the story, 399 00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:14,960 Speaker 2: but we never see it. 400 00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:17,399 Speaker 3: That you need them. And can I say congratulations girls 401 00:18:17,480 --> 00:18:20,160 Speaker 3: that it is so hard little peak behind the curtain 402 00:18:20,280 --> 00:18:22,280 Speaker 3: the for the audience, but it's so hard to organize 403 00:18:22,320 --> 00:18:25,160 Speaker 3: something like that. So props to you that that takes 404 00:18:25,160 --> 00:18:27,720 Speaker 3: a real strong audience and that takes a lot of 405 00:18:27,720 --> 00:18:30,159 Speaker 3: brain power. What you guys have built is incredible. As 406 00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:34,920 Speaker 3: a new podcaster watching you, that's like, oh my god, Mama, mama, mother. 407 00:18:35,119 --> 00:18:38,960 Speaker 3: You know, I don't know why I just gested grabbing twos. 408 00:18:38,480 --> 00:18:41,159 Speaker 1: And two giant foods. 409 00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:44,360 Speaker 3: I was going, yeah, no, that's right, that's right. 410 00:18:44,760 --> 00:18:46,960 Speaker 4: So I have a dilemma. This is a long one. 411 00:18:47,080 --> 00:18:47,600 Speaker 4: Strap in. 412 00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:50,160 Speaker 2: So my partner and I have been in a relationship 413 00:18:50,200 --> 00:18:53,520 Speaker 2: coming up five years now, let's call him Joe. I 414 00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:56,560 Speaker 2: work full time and so does Joe. However, he earns 415 00:18:56,680 --> 00:18:59,679 Speaker 2: less money than I do. We both bought houses a 416 00:18:59,680 --> 00:19:01,800 Speaker 2: few years back and love it that way because it 417 00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:05,440 Speaker 2: gives us more options down the track. Slave Eventually we 418 00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:07,720 Speaker 2: plan on having a family and getting a place together 419 00:19:07,840 --> 00:19:11,080 Speaker 2: in joint names. My place is worth more than his 420 00:19:11,359 --> 00:19:13,280 Speaker 2: and is in a different town away from where we 421 00:19:13,320 --> 00:19:16,480 Speaker 2: both work. We currently live in Joe's house, although it's 422 00:19:16,480 --> 00:19:17,920 Speaker 2: in a sketchy area, but. 423 00:19:21,359 --> 00:19:23,440 Speaker 3: Is bigger and better than his. Joe's got a small, 424 00:19:23,480 --> 00:19:28,040 Speaker 3: tiny dick, and also he's kind of ugly. Does she 425 00:19:28,240 --> 00:19:28,960 Speaker 3: like Joe? 426 00:19:29,840 --> 00:19:30,119 Speaker 1: Joe? 427 00:19:30,320 --> 00:19:30,399 Speaker 3: No? 428 00:19:30,480 --> 00:19:32,080 Speaker 4: I actually love this way. 429 00:19:32,119 --> 00:19:36,119 Speaker 2: Okay, We currently live in Joe's house, although it's in 430 00:19:36,160 --> 00:19:39,160 Speaker 2: a sketchy area, but the bills and mortgage is cheaper here, 431 00:19:39,520 --> 00:19:42,280 Speaker 2: both a win and a loss. We have always said 432 00:19:42,280 --> 00:19:44,359 Speaker 2: we wouldn't want to raise a family in the house 433 00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:47,000 Speaker 2: we live in now Joe's house because of the area 434 00:19:47,040 --> 00:19:49,800 Speaker 2: it's in, but unfortunately also couldn't justify living in my 435 00:19:49,920 --> 00:19:52,160 Speaker 2: house because it's too far away to travel each day 436 00:19:52,200 --> 00:19:58,520 Speaker 2: for work, and also he's ugly. Bears, It's kind of 437 00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:01,560 Speaker 2: continuing this way. Joe earns less money than I do 438 00:20:01,720 --> 00:20:04,600 Speaker 2: by about twelve to fourteen dollars per hour and doesn't 439 00:20:04,640 --> 00:20:07,359 Speaker 2: have the option of weekend work or overtime like I do. 440 00:20:07,960 --> 00:20:11,040 Speaker 2: I have been trying to squirrel this chick is giving 441 00:20:11,040 --> 00:20:13,399 Speaker 2: capricorn in the best way. I have been trying to 442 00:20:13,440 --> 00:20:16,120 Speaker 2: squirrel a side money into my savings account for down 443 00:20:16,160 --> 00:20:18,320 Speaker 2: the track when we want to have a family and 444 00:20:18,359 --> 00:20:21,320 Speaker 2: I need to go on maternity leave. Smart living off 445 00:20:21,359 --> 00:20:23,680 Speaker 2: one income is hard enough, and especially at the moment 446 00:20:23,720 --> 00:20:25,760 Speaker 2: with the increased cost of living, et cetera. Not to 447 00:20:25,800 --> 00:20:28,280 Speaker 2: mention the fact that we have two mortgages, even though 448 00:20:28,320 --> 00:20:32,439 Speaker 2: mine has a rental tenets in it. Okay, so I 449 00:20:32,440 --> 00:20:35,040 Speaker 2: feel like in a few years we will really struggle 450 00:20:35,080 --> 00:20:37,200 Speaker 2: when I go on maternity leave and we have to 451 00:20:37,320 --> 00:20:41,200 Speaker 2: live on Joe's wage. Joe still puts money aside for savings, however, 452 00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:43,359 Speaker 2: not as much as I do, purely due to the 453 00:20:43,359 --> 00:20:45,119 Speaker 2: fact that I earn more than he does, so I 454 00:20:45,119 --> 00:20:47,639 Speaker 2: can afford to chip in water savings. I've tried to 455 00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:49,639 Speaker 2: talk to him about getting another job because of the 456 00:20:49,680 --> 00:20:52,720 Speaker 2: money side of things, etc. But he likes his current 457 00:20:52,800 --> 00:20:56,080 Speaker 2: job and doesn't want to leave just yet. I mentioned 458 00:20:56,080 --> 00:20:59,080 Speaker 2: the maternity leave discussions and worries, and he said, we 459 00:20:59,119 --> 00:21:00,959 Speaker 2: will work it out when we get to that point. 460 00:21:01,440 --> 00:21:03,280 Speaker 4: Why don't men plan like us women do? 461 00:21:04,359 --> 00:21:07,800 Speaker 2: Slap Joe spoke to his boss slash workplace about a 462 00:21:07,840 --> 00:21:10,280 Speaker 2: possible pay rise given the cost of living, pressures, etc. 463 00:21:11,040 --> 00:21:13,880 Speaker 2: And since he hasn't gotten a pay rise at all 464 00:21:13,960 --> 00:21:17,800 Speaker 2: since he started seven years ago. Oh you got a 465 00:21:19,160 --> 00:21:22,080 Speaker 2: few months on Joe mentioned he was getting a pay rise, 466 00:21:22,119 --> 00:21:24,640 Speaker 2: although when it finally came through, the pay rise only 467 00:21:24,640 --> 00:21:26,840 Speaker 2: works out to be another forty to fifty dollars per 468 00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:27,879 Speaker 2: week after tax. 469 00:21:28,400 --> 00:21:29,120 Speaker 4: It's so rough. 470 00:21:29,520 --> 00:21:31,680 Speaker 2: I know, me going on maternity leave is a couple 471 00:21:31,720 --> 00:21:34,080 Speaker 2: of years off happening, but I can't help but stress 472 00:21:34,119 --> 00:21:36,399 Speaker 2: about money and also being stuck with a child in 473 00:21:36,440 --> 00:21:39,199 Speaker 2: a house where I don't want to be, in a 474 00:21:39,200 --> 00:21:42,600 Speaker 2: sketchy neighborhood. I don't want to say it's all about 475 00:21:42,600 --> 00:21:44,800 Speaker 2: me and let's live in my house because it's better, 476 00:21:44,960 --> 00:21:47,000 Speaker 2: because that would mean more money out the window for 477 00:21:47,040 --> 00:21:49,240 Speaker 2: the cost of mortgage and bills. 478 00:21:49,280 --> 00:21:51,760 Speaker 4: Still trying to live off my partner's crappy wage. 479 00:21:52,160 --> 00:21:54,760 Speaker 2: Oh okay, But then the other negative would mean my 480 00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:57,040 Speaker 2: partner would have to drive an hour and a half 481 00:21:57,119 --> 00:22:00,000 Speaker 2: to work one way, which is unrealistic especially on travel costs, 482 00:22:00,160 --> 00:22:02,119 Speaker 2: less time at home with me and the future baby, 483 00:22:02,160 --> 00:22:05,760 Speaker 2: which just adds to the stress load. My partner, Joe 484 00:22:05,800 --> 00:22:08,600 Speaker 2: is a very traditional type guy and is very much 485 00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:10,760 Speaker 2: in the mindset of I'm the man and I should 486 00:22:10,760 --> 00:22:13,400 Speaker 2: provide for my family. But I just don't know how 487 00:22:13,440 --> 00:22:15,960 Speaker 2: to tell him that won't be possible if he stays 488 00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:19,080 Speaker 2: at the job he is in, especially given he got 489 00:22:19,080 --> 00:22:21,920 Speaker 2: his first pay rise in seven years and realistically won't 490 00:22:21,920 --> 00:22:24,600 Speaker 2: get another one before we have a family. He was 491 00:22:24,640 --> 00:22:28,440 Speaker 2: offered another job with slightly more pay a few months ago, however, 492 00:22:28,560 --> 00:22:31,520 Speaker 2: turned it down because he liked the job he was 493 00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:34,320 Speaker 2: in and it was closer to our house currently. And 494 00:22:34,359 --> 00:22:36,440 Speaker 2: when he told me he declined that offer, I felt 495 00:22:36,560 --> 00:22:37,840 Speaker 2: very bummed deep down, of. 496 00:22:37,800 --> 00:22:39,880 Speaker 4: Course, but of course supported his decision. 497 00:22:40,160 --> 00:22:42,520 Speaker 2: Should I suck it up and continue to save money 498 00:22:42,640 --> 00:22:44,919 Speaker 2: and stay where we are for Matt leave down the track, 499 00:22:45,040 --> 00:22:47,120 Speaker 2: dipping into my savings to get by with the hope 500 00:22:47,160 --> 00:22:49,520 Speaker 2: that once we have a baby who is like one 501 00:22:49,560 --> 00:22:51,760 Speaker 2: to two years old, we will have saved enough to 502 00:22:51,760 --> 00:22:54,480 Speaker 2: buy our forever home, which is ultimately the goal. 503 00:22:55,000 --> 00:22:58,120 Speaker 4: How do I go about this? What do I do? Please? 504 00:22:58,440 --> 00:22:59,400 Speaker 1: Help? Oh? 505 00:22:59,480 --> 00:23:02,560 Speaker 4: My wow, holy shit? 506 00:23:03,240 --> 00:23:05,480 Speaker 3: I mean, I've got many thoughts. But I also want 507 00:23:05,480 --> 00:23:07,119 Speaker 3: to cock myself because I don't want to be defending 508 00:23:07,160 --> 00:23:09,960 Speaker 3: the man. Because she's a girl boss. I love her totally. 509 00:23:10,119 --> 00:23:10,960 Speaker 3: I go for it. 510 00:23:11,040 --> 00:23:14,640 Speaker 2: Every single thing that she has raised is a very 511 00:23:14,840 --> 00:23:15,760 Speaker 2: real concern. 512 00:23:16,320 --> 00:23:18,440 Speaker 4: And I actually love that she is being. 513 00:23:18,320 --> 00:23:23,160 Speaker 2: So pregnant, standing and practical and like and not being like, oh, 514 00:23:23,200 --> 00:23:23,639 Speaker 2: we're going to. 515 00:23:23,840 --> 00:23:25,639 Speaker 4: Have a baby and it's going to be so cute, 516 00:23:25,640 --> 00:23:26,800 Speaker 4: and like she's. 517 00:23:26,640 --> 00:23:30,040 Speaker 2: Actually absolutely a Capricorn or a Virgo one thousand percent 518 00:23:30,240 --> 00:23:31,960 Speaker 2: and out in my mind, I need to know we're 519 00:23:31,960 --> 00:23:33,399 Speaker 2: going to email her back and ask that. 520 00:23:33,600 --> 00:23:36,840 Speaker 3: Yeah, that being said, it's not like he's a slob 521 00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:38,920 Speaker 3: and he's not trying. He asks for a pay rise, 522 00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:41,120 Speaker 3: the company's not given him a pay rise. He can't 523 00:23:41,119 --> 00:23:43,320 Speaker 3: be expected then to change your job to then travel 524 00:23:43,320 --> 00:23:45,919 Speaker 3: one point five hours. I get it. It's hard, But 525 00:23:46,320 --> 00:23:48,320 Speaker 3: they're in a relationship. It sounds like they're a great couple. 526 00:23:48,359 --> 00:23:50,439 Speaker 3: Sounds like she really loves him. It's something they're going 527 00:23:50,480 --> 00:23:52,840 Speaker 3: to have to work out together. And it also sounds 528 00:23:52,880 --> 00:23:55,520 Speaker 3: like perhaps she's going to have to open the avenues 529 00:23:55,520 --> 00:23:57,199 Speaker 3: of communication a little more. She's going to have to 530 00:23:57,240 --> 00:24:00,320 Speaker 3: talk to him because a this will fester and will 531 00:24:00,320 --> 00:24:02,280 Speaker 3: cause way more issues. And if they're wanting kids and 532 00:24:02,280 --> 00:24:04,800 Speaker 3: they're already talking about kids, it's gonna be a problem. Two, 533 00:24:05,200 --> 00:24:08,399 Speaker 3: they're in a really solid position both having houses and 534 00:24:08,440 --> 00:24:13,840 Speaker 3: what she says, by the beach and has. 535 00:24:12,359 --> 00:24:14,919 Speaker 1: Okay, just a shack. 536 00:24:17,000 --> 00:24:18,399 Speaker 4: Literally the apartment I'm renting. 537 00:24:18,440 --> 00:24:24,720 Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, fuck your Joe. So I wrote it. 538 00:24:24,720 --> 00:24:26,560 Speaker 3: It's a tough situation. But she's gonna have to talk 539 00:24:26,600 --> 00:24:29,280 Speaker 3: to him because they're in a relationship. It's no fault 540 00:24:29,320 --> 00:24:31,160 Speaker 3: of Joe's. He's not a lazy slob. He's not gaming 541 00:24:31,200 --> 00:24:32,800 Speaker 3: in his undias like he sounds like he's putting in 542 00:24:32,880 --> 00:24:35,520 Speaker 3: the works. You're a couple of year union sort it out, 543 00:24:35,560 --> 00:24:36,919 Speaker 3: like you have to work it out together. 544 00:24:36,840 --> 00:24:39,080 Speaker 1: And you do have to have those hard conversations, which 545 00:24:39,119 --> 00:24:40,960 Speaker 1: there's just going to be more of that, especially once 546 00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:41,720 Speaker 1: you have kids. 547 00:24:41,720 --> 00:24:43,040 Speaker 4: Like, yeah, if. 548 00:24:42,840 --> 00:24:46,160 Speaker 1: You can't have those uncomfortable conversations, you're putting a limit 549 00:24:46,240 --> 00:24:49,640 Speaker 1: on how much you're trusting your relationship and how much 550 00:24:49,680 --> 00:24:52,480 Speaker 1: it can become stronger, because every time you have those 551 00:24:52,480 --> 00:24:55,480 Speaker 1: hard conversations and you come out the other side of it, 552 00:24:55,480 --> 00:24:58,760 Speaker 1: it enriches your relationship rather than like turns it away. 553 00:24:58,960 --> 00:25:01,000 Speaker 4: Yeah, if it's the right relationship, for sure. 554 00:25:01,119 --> 00:25:04,639 Speaker 1: And I do think though that it will come to 555 00:25:04,680 --> 00:25:08,240 Speaker 1: a point that like Joe has to make a choice 556 00:25:08,320 --> 00:25:11,240 Speaker 1: because if Joe wants kids, like this is a partnership 557 00:25:11,680 --> 00:25:16,159 Speaker 1: and like from the sounds of it, the pay that 558 00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:19,960 Speaker 1: they're on wouldn't support a family. Yeah, so like if 559 00:25:19,960 --> 00:25:23,480 Speaker 1: they want a family, it does mean that potentially something 560 00:25:23,520 --> 00:25:24,359 Speaker 1: would have to change. 561 00:25:24,680 --> 00:25:24,920 Speaker 3: Yeah. 562 00:25:25,119 --> 00:25:27,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, because the thing is is that she'll be the 563 00:25:27,760 --> 00:25:31,080 Speaker 2: one making the sacrifice with her career to matanity leave 564 00:25:31,640 --> 00:25:34,120 Speaker 2: and take care of the baby. So I do think 565 00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:37,120 Speaker 2: that is something that they need to discuss together. 566 00:25:37,640 --> 00:25:40,000 Speaker 4: But also they need to have a conversation. 567 00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:43,399 Speaker 2: Around his ideals and values that he wants to be 568 00:25:43,440 --> 00:25:46,760 Speaker 2: the traditional man and the breadwinner and whatnot. Because I 569 00:25:46,840 --> 00:25:49,879 Speaker 2: also think that that is part of this conversation that 570 00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:54,720 Speaker 2: maybe he doesn't want to address fully because it kind 571 00:25:54,760 --> 00:25:58,800 Speaker 2: of makes him feel insecure about his masculinity. But it's like, 572 00:25:59,280 --> 00:26:02,879 Speaker 2: in twenty twenty, I just don't think that that's I 573 00:26:02,960 --> 00:26:05,080 Speaker 2: understand if you want to provide for your family, of course, 574 00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:07,400 Speaker 2: but like that should be an equal thing that. 575 00:26:07,480 --> 00:26:08,479 Speaker 4: Both of you value. 576 00:26:08,720 --> 00:26:11,160 Speaker 2: I feel like you both should kind of take care 577 00:26:11,200 --> 00:26:12,400 Speaker 2: of your family a little bit. 578 00:26:13,040 --> 00:26:15,600 Speaker 1: Did she say she was the only person contributing to 579 00:26:15,680 --> 00:26:20,080 Speaker 1: her maternity leave savings? She's able to put away more savings, 580 00:26:20,160 --> 00:26:21,520 Speaker 1: but he's still contributing to it. 581 00:26:21,720 --> 00:26:24,600 Speaker 2: He's putting away his separate they both have separate savings, 582 00:26:25,760 --> 00:26:29,000 Speaker 2: I believe, so yeah, but he's she's able to put 583 00:26:29,040 --> 00:26:32,840 Speaker 2: away more purely because she works more, and also because 584 00:26:32,880 --> 00:26:34,560 Speaker 2: she said she has the option for overtime. 585 00:26:34,800 --> 00:26:38,399 Speaker 1: Okay, as long as he's also contributing to that maternity 586 00:26:38,480 --> 00:26:42,000 Speaker 1: league savings as well. Like that shouldn't just be her. 587 00:26:42,359 --> 00:26:43,800 Speaker 1: But I think you hit the nail on the head 588 00:26:43,840 --> 00:26:46,800 Speaker 1: at the start. I think like that hard conversation needs 589 00:26:46,840 --> 00:26:47,280 Speaker 1: to happen. 590 00:26:47,560 --> 00:26:49,399 Speaker 3: Oh yeah, for sure. But you know they're in a 591 00:26:49,400 --> 00:26:51,159 Speaker 3: good position, Like if you really want to be with 592 00:26:51,200 --> 00:26:53,000 Speaker 3: this guy and you love him and you're a good couple, 593 00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:55,400 Speaker 3: then sell one of your properties. You know, you've got 594 00:26:55,400 --> 00:26:57,919 Speaker 3: your properties privilege. So many people, so many young people 595 00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:00,239 Speaker 3: can barely pay the rent, let alone pay more your 596 00:27:00,240 --> 00:27:02,840 Speaker 3: payments on two properties. She also said she's got renters 597 00:27:02,840 --> 00:27:04,840 Speaker 3: paying money, so she's I don't know if it's negatively 598 00:27:04,880 --> 00:27:07,679 Speaker 3: good or now it sounds like we're really going into finance. 599 00:27:08,160 --> 00:27:12,359 Speaker 3: I don't know how she set up financially. I know 600 00:27:12,960 --> 00:27:14,520 Speaker 3: I was trying to give chat show host, but I'm 601 00:27:14,560 --> 00:27:20,760 Speaker 3: just giving on Friday. I think they need to have 602 00:27:20,760 --> 00:27:22,480 Speaker 3: a chat. They could sell one of their properties, like, 603 00:27:22,520 --> 00:27:25,640 Speaker 3: there's got many options. Yeah, it sounds like she does 604 00:27:25,680 --> 00:27:27,840 Speaker 3: love him, but you know what, so many people are 605 00:27:27,840 --> 00:27:30,240 Speaker 3: in this situation financially, Like I want her to know 606 00:27:30,240 --> 00:27:33,520 Speaker 3: if she's listening, you're not. It can feel when you're 607 00:27:33,520 --> 00:27:36,200 Speaker 3: in this that it's it's happening to you exclusively, and 608 00:27:36,240 --> 00:27:38,639 Speaker 3: when you've also got your five year ten year plan 609 00:27:38,760 --> 00:27:43,399 Speaker 3: laid out, especially with kids, it can start to feel daunting. 610 00:27:43,440 --> 00:27:45,480 Speaker 3: But so many people, especially in this country, are going 611 00:27:45,520 --> 00:27:49,520 Speaker 3: through this exact thing right now, so it's very very 612 00:27:49,680 --> 00:27:50,359 Speaker 3: like relatable. 613 00:27:50,600 --> 00:27:53,399 Speaker 2: Yeah, and she did ask is this something that I 614 00:27:53,440 --> 00:27:56,000 Speaker 2: should wait and hold on to until we have a 615 00:27:56,080 --> 00:27:58,560 Speaker 2: child who's maybe one or two years old, and then 616 00:27:58,600 --> 00:28:01,000 Speaker 2: we look at moving and buying out over home. But 617 00:28:01,359 --> 00:28:03,480 Speaker 2: I think you still need to have the conversation now, 618 00:28:03,560 --> 00:28:06,120 Speaker 2: because once you have kids, you're only going to have 619 00:28:06,680 --> 00:28:11,159 Speaker 2: more and more responsibilities and expenses and also ties to 620 00:28:11,200 --> 00:28:13,399 Speaker 2: where you live based on whatever that is. Even if 621 00:28:13,440 --> 00:28:15,359 Speaker 2: it's just like, oh, well we've got our gp and 622 00:28:15,400 --> 00:28:17,600 Speaker 2: they know the baby and like all of those things, 623 00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:20,960 Speaker 2: I think only get harder and harder to make those decisions. 624 00:28:21,040 --> 00:28:23,480 Speaker 4: You have way less flexibility so can I also. 625 00:28:23,240 --> 00:28:26,000 Speaker 3: Say, like, it's really sexy to have a partner who's ambitious. 626 00:28:26,200 --> 00:28:28,639 Speaker 3: It's really hot to know that your partner has a 627 00:28:28,680 --> 00:28:31,760 Speaker 3: plan and your partner wants more money. It's hot. My 628 00:28:31,880 --> 00:28:35,000 Speaker 3: partner is in health and has a full plan and 629 00:28:35,040 --> 00:28:37,800 Speaker 3: a full trajectory and is only just straight out of 630 00:28:37,880 --> 00:28:40,640 Speaker 3: UNI study working full time, and he's on a certain 631 00:28:40,720 --> 00:28:42,800 Speaker 3: pay level as you can expect coming out of union 632 00:28:42,920 --> 00:28:45,520 Speaker 3: working in health Allied health. But there's a full plan 633 00:28:45,680 --> 00:28:48,479 Speaker 3: and a trajectory and ways forward to get there, and 634 00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:51,640 Speaker 3: you can ambition ambition, Yeah, thank you, Yes, And I 635 00:28:51,680 --> 00:28:54,200 Speaker 3: find that really attractive rather than I've been I've been 636 00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:56,800 Speaker 3: with someone in the past who is a great deal 637 00:28:56,800 --> 00:28:58,400 Speaker 3: of anxiety for them where they would go or how 638 00:28:58,440 --> 00:29:00,120 Speaker 3: they'd work, or they didn't want to ask for ay 639 00:29:00,120 --> 00:29:04,640 Speaker 3: your eyes or a crippled and it's unattractive. So I'm 640 00:29:04,680 --> 00:29:06,520 Speaker 3: not trying to I'm not trying to judge Joe, but 641 00:29:06,760 --> 00:29:09,160 Speaker 3: in a relationship, especially when you want kids down the 642 00:29:09,160 --> 00:29:12,080 Speaker 3: track like it can, it can make or break some couples. 643 00:29:12,080 --> 00:29:14,520 Speaker 3: You know, it's not as simple as as it sounds. 644 00:29:14,720 --> 00:29:16,800 Speaker 4: Yeah, definitely check. 645 00:29:17,120 --> 00:29:19,440 Speaker 1: We'll send you a fifty dollars gift card for reading 646 00:29:19,440 --> 00:29:20,240 Speaker 1: out your story online. 647 00:29:20,280 --> 00:29:21,280 Speaker 4: Hopefully that helps. 648 00:29:21,520 --> 00:29:27,000 Speaker 1: Exactly that sounds. Money woves sorted toware wherever they want out. 649 00:29:27,520 --> 00:29:30,680 Speaker 1: Okay our next one. Hey, ladies, can't wait for your 650 00:29:30,720 --> 00:29:36,280 Speaker 1: Melbourne Live show. I could send three emails of all 651 00:29:36,320 --> 00:29:39,040 Speaker 1: the drummers and small hiccups I'm having trying to move 652 00:29:39,120 --> 00:29:41,120 Speaker 1: in my new place and out of my old one, 653 00:29:41,200 --> 00:29:43,280 Speaker 1: but this one is a shout out to some of 654 00:29:43,320 --> 00:29:46,520 Speaker 1: my ride or dies. What would Jess and Jemima do? 655 00:29:47,320 --> 00:29:52,480 Speaker 1: Okakay love this subject. Lise w w JJD doing a 656 00:29:52,600 --> 00:29:55,960 Speaker 1: lease transfer into the new place, so I was contacted 657 00:29:56,000 --> 00:29:58,400 Speaker 1: by the girl whose room I would be taking over. 658 00:29:58,800 --> 00:30:00,760 Speaker 1: I got a text from the girl whose room I 659 00:30:00,800 --> 00:30:04,440 Speaker 1: would be taking over from asking for the rent money 660 00:30:04,480 --> 00:30:06,800 Speaker 1: as the agent was slow to do the paperwork and 661 00:30:06,880 --> 00:30:09,440 Speaker 1: had marked up all the names of people coming and going, 662 00:30:09,840 --> 00:30:13,680 Speaker 1: and the next month's rent had been deducted from her account. 663 00:30:14,000 --> 00:30:17,120 Speaker 1: In the text, she also asked for the bond. I said, 664 00:30:17,120 --> 00:30:19,200 Speaker 1: I think it's fair that I pay the rent and 665 00:30:19,280 --> 00:30:22,480 Speaker 1: not the bond, as we haven't seen any paperwork yet 666 00:30:22,480 --> 00:30:25,360 Speaker 1: for the bond transfer and the lease is still incorrect. 667 00:30:25,760 --> 00:30:29,680 Speaker 1: She questioned bond transfer, I said, we haven't even signed 668 00:30:29,720 --> 00:30:33,200 Speaker 1: the lease yet, let alone seen discuss the bond transfer yet. 669 00:30:33,240 --> 00:30:36,280 Speaker 1: In the stream of emails, I asked her, do you 670 00:30:36,440 --> 00:30:39,640 Speaker 1: have the bond transfer? She said, no, we don't have one. 671 00:30:39,720 --> 00:30:42,720 Speaker 1: We just transfer the amount to whomever is moving out. 672 00:30:43,000 --> 00:30:45,120 Speaker 1: I said no, sorry, I sent you the rent, but 673 00:30:45,160 --> 00:30:47,440 Speaker 1: I won't be sending the bond until we have the 674 00:30:47,440 --> 00:30:51,320 Speaker 1: bond transfer. What I'm assuming is that's the paperwork. Yeah, 675 00:30:51,360 --> 00:30:53,680 Speaker 1: she said, we don't do it like that. I said, sorry, 676 00:30:53,720 --> 00:30:56,040 Speaker 1: but that's not the legal way really, and if something 677 00:30:56,120 --> 00:30:58,160 Speaker 1: goes wrong or the owners want to sell the house, 678 00:30:58,240 --> 00:31:00,320 Speaker 1: I don't get that money back because of my name 679 00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:03,760 Speaker 1: isn't on the bond. Her next reply was pissy. I 680 00:31:03,840 --> 00:31:06,520 Speaker 1: apologized and said I'll email the agent now to get 681 00:31:06,520 --> 00:31:08,480 Speaker 1: it sorted. Please don't think I'm not going to pay 682 00:31:08,520 --> 00:31:10,960 Speaker 1: you the bond. I was then left on red After this, 683 00:31:11,680 --> 00:31:14,479 Speaker 1: I called Jess and Jemima that night and told them 684 00:31:14,520 --> 00:31:16,760 Speaker 1: the story and was reassured I was one hundred percent 685 00:31:16,840 --> 00:31:19,240 Speaker 1: in the right. I felt bad, but I don't know 686 00:31:19,320 --> 00:31:21,280 Speaker 1: the girl. I thought the rent was fair, but not 687 00:31:21,400 --> 00:31:26,400 Speaker 1: the bond until something was signed. If I hadn't asked myself, WWJJD, 688 00:31:26,840 --> 00:31:29,360 Speaker 1: I would have paid her everything and caved without signing. 689 00:31:29,680 --> 00:31:31,760 Speaker 1: My mates are tough and agree at saying no and 690 00:31:31,800 --> 00:31:35,120 Speaker 1: knowing what's reasonable and what isn't. Sometimes you have to 691 00:31:35,160 --> 00:31:37,400 Speaker 1: come across as a bitch to save yourself and do 692 00:31:37,440 --> 00:31:40,480 Speaker 1: the things the legal and right away in the week. 693 00:31:40,560 --> 00:31:43,040 Speaker 1: I later learned that the agent had to add people 694 00:31:43,080 --> 00:31:45,400 Speaker 1: on the bond and take them off again straight away, 695 00:31:45,440 --> 00:31:48,200 Speaker 1: so people hadn't been doing the bond transfers in the past, 696 00:31:48,560 --> 00:31:51,640 Speaker 1: and the agent had to backtrack previous tenants so their 697 00:31:51,680 --> 00:31:59,280 Speaker 1: paperwork look legit. God Jesus, what a rollercoaster. Yeah, so, yeah, 698 00:31:59,280 --> 00:32:02,880 Speaker 1: one hundred percent, you need to be having the paperwork 699 00:32:02,920 --> 00:32:03,200 Speaker 1: for that. 700 00:32:03,560 --> 00:32:07,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, especially with people that you don't know, like I 701 00:32:07,040 --> 00:32:09,800 Speaker 2: even think with friends and stuff like that, with bond 702 00:32:09,840 --> 00:32:13,840 Speaker 2: transfers and leases like money like that, it can get 703 00:32:13,880 --> 00:32:16,600 Speaker 2: really messy. But with a complete stranger who you don't know, like, 704 00:32:16,800 --> 00:32:20,280 Speaker 2: absolutely do all the right things and do all of 705 00:32:20,320 --> 00:32:21,960 Speaker 2: the official channels and legal channels. 706 00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:23,760 Speaker 3: So that would make me so much more comfortable being 707 00:32:23,760 --> 00:32:26,040 Speaker 3: a bitch if I didn't know that person. Yeah, Like, 708 00:32:26,120 --> 00:32:28,200 Speaker 3: I'm such a bit honk in my horn like driving 709 00:32:28,200 --> 00:32:29,880 Speaker 3: and I'm so bad in traffic. I'm so rude. But 710 00:32:29,920 --> 00:32:32,479 Speaker 3: if I knew that person, I'd be like completely changes 711 00:32:32,520 --> 00:32:35,520 Speaker 3: howe Like I could never do that. I find it 712 00:32:35,520 --> 00:32:37,840 Speaker 3: really hard to assert myself with friends and family, but 713 00:32:37,920 --> 00:32:40,440 Speaker 3: with strangers it can be easier. So I'm glad she 714 00:32:40,520 --> 00:32:43,040 Speaker 3: did that. Especially with money. I feel like a lot 715 00:32:43,040 --> 00:32:44,720 Speaker 3: of young people, I don't know what it is, maybe 716 00:32:44,720 --> 00:32:46,480 Speaker 3: because in high school and Australia we only had those 717 00:32:46,480 --> 00:32:49,040 Speaker 3: Commonwealth dollarmite things check books, Like no one taught us 718 00:32:49,080 --> 00:32:51,600 Speaker 3: how to be money literate. Yeah, but that kind of conversation, 719 00:32:51,720 --> 00:32:54,400 Speaker 3: I feel is so common and it's so easy to 720 00:32:54,440 --> 00:32:56,000 Speaker 3: be walked all over. So she did the right thing. 721 00:32:56,800 --> 00:32:58,560 Speaker 1: Had like a horror housemate story. 722 00:32:58,840 --> 00:33:01,360 Speaker 3: Oh so yeah. One of my exes that I lived 723 00:33:01,360 --> 00:33:04,479 Speaker 3: with for a long time five years, we split up 724 00:33:04,520 --> 00:33:06,680 Speaker 3: and it was really messy and we had this gorgeous 725 00:33:06,720 --> 00:33:10,280 Speaker 3: house right around this quarter from the studios actually, and 726 00:33:10,520 --> 00:33:12,320 Speaker 3: there was a bad ending and he was not good. 727 00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:15,240 Speaker 3: So I was like, you are paying the lease, a 728 00:33:15,320 --> 00:33:18,600 Speaker 3: break of lease you, we're going to get the bum back, 729 00:33:18,600 --> 00:33:20,680 Speaker 3: We're going to split it. You sort it out because 730 00:33:20,760 --> 00:33:22,800 Speaker 3: you've caused the end of this relationship. And I left 731 00:33:23,080 --> 00:33:24,479 Speaker 3: and that was it. I didn't do anything. 732 00:33:25,840 --> 00:33:27,560 Speaker 1: Well, the reason you have to break the lease is 733 00:33:27,600 --> 00:33:31,200 Speaker 1: because they broke the relationship one, they broke the rules. 734 00:33:30,960 --> 00:33:34,160 Speaker 3: Of the relationship. Yeah, but it is overwhelming and like 735 00:33:34,720 --> 00:33:38,480 Speaker 3: the whole submitting of bills and bank details and it's stressful, 736 00:33:38,520 --> 00:33:40,240 Speaker 3: Like you're either I don't know how you were you 737 00:33:40,240 --> 00:33:42,360 Speaker 3: guys faught. But I fall on the side of money 738 00:33:42,360 --> 00:33:44,480 Speaker 3: and finances being a real issue for me, Like I 739 00:33:44,480 --> 00:33:45,240 Speaker 3: struggle with it. 740 00:33:45,520 --> 00:33:49,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, we're both not like natural money savvy queens. Like 741 00:33:49,720 --> 00:33:52,440 Speaker 2: it's something that we have that I feel like even 742 00:33:52,480 --> 00:33:55,200 Speaker 2: through the show, we've learnt so much more and realized 743 00:33:55,240 --> 00:33:57,200 Speaker 2: that when it does come to those sorts of things. 744 00:33:57,520 --> 00:33:59,320 Speaker 2: I think when we were in our early twenties, we 745 00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:00,720 Speaker 2: would have been like, oh, no, I don't want to 746 00:34:00,760 --> 00:34:02,960 Speaker 2: cause a face or whether it was with a friend 747 00:34:03,080 --> 00:34:05,760 Speaker 2: or with the stranger, and now we'd just be like no, 748 00:34:06,400 --> 00:34:09,600 Speaker 2: like we've got we've got the procedures in place that 749 00:34:09,600 --> 00:34:11,960 Speaker 2: are meant to be followed for a reason, and that's 750 00:34:11,960 --> 00:34:15,799 Speaker 2: really frustrating with the like the people that they're renting through. 751 00:34:16,000 --> 00:34:17,960 Speaker 3: Yeah, I agree, And also that the goal on that 752 00:34:18,040 --> 00:34:20,439 Speaker 3: random girl, yeah, to ask that, but she was also 753 00:34:20,440 --> 00:34:21,600 Speaker 3: being sneaking in and of itself. 754 00:34:21,680 --> 00:34:24,920 Speaker 1: Yeah, I think as well, what's probably happened is that's 755 00:34:25,280 --> 00:34:30,760 Speaker 1: how she transferred the bond. Yeah, so then she's probably 756 00:34:30,760 --> 00:34:33,600 Speaker 1: had the realization of, well, fuck, my name's not on 757 00:34:33,640 --> 00:34:37,000 Speaker 1: the bond, so if you don't transfer me, am I 758 00:34:37,040 --> 00:34:39,359 Speaker 1: going to get my money back because my name's not 759 00:34:39,440 --> 00:34:39,719 Speaker 1: on it? 760 00:34:39,960 --> 00:34:40,320 Speaker 2: Yeah? 761 00:34:40,320 --> 00:34:43,160 Speaker 1: And like how does that work? And like that is 762 00:34:43,200 --> 00:34:45,920 Speaker 1: how I think my rental apartment did it. When I 763 00:34:46,040 --> 00:34:50,080 Speaker 1: change people, it was like we updated the name and 764 00:34:50,960 --> 00:34:53,400 Speaker 1: you would transfer directly to the person, but you're you 765 00:34:53,520 --> 00:34:56,600 Speaker 1: still saw the piece of paper. Yeah, Like and that 766 00:34:56,760 --> 00:35:00,480 Speaker 1: is the thing of especially I think younger gener and 767 00:35:00,560 --> 00:35:04,879 Speaker 1: especially women, they don't assert themselves in those positions from 768 00:35:04,920 --> 00:35:08,200 Speaker 1: being intimidated or not wanting to come across as a bitch. 769 00:35:08,920 --> 00:35:12,040 Speaker 1: And it's like, no, you have to be a bitch. Yeah, 770 00:35:12,160 --> 00:35:14,040 Speaker 1: you have to put your foot down otherwise you're going 771 00:35:14,120 --> 00:35:17,160 Speaker 1: to end up because what a bond now is four 772 00:35:17,200 --> 00:35:18,439 Speaker 1: weeks of rent. It's like a month. 773 00:35:18,520 --> 00:35:20,640 Speaker 3: It's expensive, Yes, it's a lot. 774 00:35:21,000 --> 00:35:23,680 Speaker 1: And to not get that bad and to not have 775 00:35:23,760 --> 00:35:27,600 Speaker 1: any sort of agreement around that is wailed. 776 00:35:28,200 --> 00:35:30,719 Speaker 3: You never get this message from a man. They'd never 777 00:35:30,800 --> 00:35:34,560 Speaker 3: be like I'm afraid to ask you never would. 778 00:35:35,160 --> 00:35:36,200 Speaker 4: That's so true. 779 00:35:36,480 --> 00:35:39,719 Speaker 1: Well, thank you so much our prints O. 780 00:35:39,960 --> 00:35:41,799 Speaker 3: What a pleasure show. 781 00:35:42,000 --> 00:35:43,360 Speaker 4: Where can the chicks find you? 782 00:35:43,560 --> 00:35:46,000 Speaker 3: Find the show on all socials, search the Michtury Chat 783 00:35:46,000 --> 00:35:48,759 Speaker 3: Show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify YouTube. You can watch us 784 00:35:48,760 --> 00:35:51,799 Speaker 3: on YouTube. You see the set, Yeah, you can see 785 00:35:51,800 --> 00:35:53,680 Speaker 3: the set. We're revealing the set in the coming days, 786 00:35:53,680 --> 00:35:55,480 Speaker 3: so you'll see the gorgeous set. And I'd like to 787 00:35:55,480 --> 00:35:57,480 Speaker 3: formally invite the two of you on the show. 788 00:35:58,760 --> 00:36:02,160 Speaker 4: To you if we can kick in the door, can 789 00:36:02,200 --> 00:36:03,200 Speaker 4: we come on it naked? 790 00:36:05,440 --> 00:36:06,840 Speaker 3: No one wants that deal. 791 00:36:07,040 --> 00:36:09,120 Speaker 2: Thank you so much for coming on the show. Thanks 792 00:36:09,160 --> 00:36:11,799 Speaker 2: to you chicks for sending in your submissions. Like we said, 793 00:36:12,200 --> 00:36:14,359 Speaker 2: everybody whose submission we read out, we will send you 794 00:36:14,480 --> 00:36:18,640 Speaker 2: a fifty dollars voucher to retailer of your choice. And 795 00:36:18,640 --> 00:36:21,080 Speaker 2: thanks for m ik made for making today's episode happen. 796 00:36:21,200 --> 00:36:22,360 Speaker 2: We love ya, love yall. 797 00:36:22,520 --> 00:36:25,320 Speaker 4: Bye chicks. Se yah yahya.