1 00:00:00,440 --> 00:00:03,080 Speaker 1: Good eight team. It's harps hope, you bloody terrific. So 2 00:00:03,080 --> 00:00:05,080 Speaker 1: I want to talk to you about the very common 3 00:00:06,160 --> 00:00:11,600 Speaker 1: habit of getting stuck. That is spinning our wheels, that 4 00:00:11,800 --> 00:00:16,280 Speaker 1: is living life or part of our life in a 5 00:00:16,680 --> 00:00:21,360 Speaker 1: perpetual holding pattern, thinking about doing different while not doing different, 6 00:00:21,440 --> 00:00:25,799 Speaker 1: talking about doing different and better while not doing it, 7 00:00:25,880 --> 00:00:29,680 Speaker 1: talking about transformation and improvement and growth and learning and 8 00:00:29,920 --> 00:00:33,320 Speaker 1: unlearning and becoming the best version of ourselves and exploring 9 00:00:33,360 --> 00:00:37,120 Speaker 1: our talents and our potential and building our best whatever, 10 00:00:37,159 --> 00:00:43,000 Speaker 1: while simultaneously not fucking doing it. Ah, And let's be honest. 11 00:00:43,159 --> 00:00:44,919 Speaker 1: Let's be honest. That's a lot of people a lot 12 00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:47,760 Speaker 1: of the time. And that's not me being critical. That's 13 00:00:47,800 --> 00:00:52,040 Speaker 1: me being an observer of people. Also myself being one 14 00:00:52,080 --> 00:00:54,920 Speaker 1: of those people. So there've been many times in my 15 00:00:55,080 --> 00:01:01,040 Speaker 1: life when I have been I've been, I guess, trapped 16 00:01:01,080 --> 00:01:05,319 Speaker 1: in a kind of a holding pattern, a holding pattern 17 00:01:05,360 --> 00:01:10,120 Speaker 1: of mediocrity, like a groundhog day, like same shits, same stuff, 18 00:01:10,240 --> 00:01:13,840 Speaker 1: same doing the same things with my business or my brand, 19 00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:17,760 Speaker 1: or my money, or my body, or my relationships or 20 00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:22,760 Speaker 1: my spiritual life or my mental health or my emotional 21 00:01:22,800 --> 00:01:29,240 Speaker 1: health or my academic pursuits, my learning, commitment, my training, 22 00:01:29,760 --> 00:01:34,000 Speaker 1: my nutrition, doing stuff that didn't work, but nonetheless getting 23 00:01:34,040 --> 00:01:37,120 Speaker 1: up each day and essentially doing a version of what 24 00:01:37,280 --> 00:01:43,959 Speaker 1: didn't work the last day, month, year, decade sometimes. So 25 00:01:44,360 --> 00:01:47,640 Speaker 1: I'm very interested in, as you all well know, I'm 26 00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:52,400 Speaker 1: interested in human potential. I'm interested in possibilities. I'm interested 27 00:01:52,440 --> 00:01:57,080 Speaker 1: in what we can do, what I can do, what 28 00:01:57,160 --> 00:01:59,160 Speaker 1: you can do when you and me get out of 29 00:01:59,160 --> 00:02:05,680 Speaker 1: our own way, when I can get out of my 30 00:02:05,960 --> 00:02:15,640 Speaker 1: destructive habits, my self destructive self talk, thinking, my shitty lifestyle, 31 00:02:15,919 --> 00:02:19,720 Speaker 1: not so much these days, but at times, my relationships, 32 00:02:19,760 --> 00:02:25,320 Speaker 1: my operating system, not just relationships with people, but relationships 33 00:02:25,360 --> 00:02:31,400 Speaker 1: with food, relationships with my body, relationships with all of 34 00:02:31,440 --> 00:02:36,320 Speaker 1: the things that I do, habits and behaviors, and stepping 35 00:02:36,400 --> 00:02:40,960 Speaker 1: into out of the self destruction and the overthinking and 36 00:02:40,960 --> 00:02:44,360 Speaker 1: the self doubt and the imposter syndrome, and slowly stepping 37 00:02:44,400 --> 00:02:49,960 Speaker 1: into self awareness and self genuine self improvement and self 38 00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:55,040 Speaker 1: regulation and self optimization for that matter. So many years, 39 00:02:55,040 --> 00:02:57,160 Speaker 1: for many years, I worked with people who came to 40 00:02:57,200 --> 00:03:01,280 Speaker 1: me to get in shape physically, and then more recently 41 00:03:01,440 --> 00:03:05,760 Speaker 1: last decade or so, you know, mentally and emotionally, but 42 00:03:05,880 --> 00:03:10,760 Speaker 1: who were stuck and stuck physically sometimes or stuck mentally 43 00:03:10,840 --> 00:03:16,160 Speaker 1: or emotionally all three, or socially and or socially practically 44 00:03:16,280 --> 00:03:23,760 Speaker 1: behaviorally you know, just in this normal operating system that 45 00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:30,120 Speaker 1: doesn't work. So there's there's a there's a degree of 46 00:03:30,400 --> 00:03:35,440 Speaker 1: unconsciousness that all of us in habit, and as the 47 00:03:35,520 --> 00:03:39,040 Speaker 1: name suggests, we're not aware of it. That is, we 48 00:03:39,280 --> 00:03:41,880 Speaker 1: unconsciously do a lot of things, and we do a 49 00:03:41,880 --> 00:03:45,360 Speaker 1: lot of things that really will require very very low 50 00:03:45,440 --> 00:03:49,240 Speaker 1: level decision making in that you know, we've got to 51 00:03:49,240 --> 00:03:50,880 Speaker 1: open the fridge to get the thing out to put 52 00:03:50,880 --> 00:03:53,080 Speaker 1: it in our mouth, but it's almost like we do 53 00:03:53,200 --> 00:03:56,720 Speaker 1: that without thinking, without choosing. It's just a habit, it's 54 00:03:56,760 --> 00:03:59,840 Speaker 1: a pattern, that's a ritual, it's a behavior. I feel 55 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,520 Speaker 1: I'm not hungry, I'm not actually hungry, I don't actually 56 00:04:02,560 --> 00:04:04,880 Speaker 1: need food, but I'm having a bad day. So now 57 00:04:04,920 --> 00:04:08,560 Speaker 1: I'm grabbing chocolate. Now I'm eating chocolate, I feel a 58 00:04:08,640 --> 00:04:11,360 Speaker 1: bit flat, I feel a bit anxious. Now I'm grabbing booze. 59 00:04:11,360 --> 00:04:14,840 Speaker 1: I fit whatever. And so we have a propensity and 60 00:04:15,040 --> 00:04:18,040 Speaker 1: a tendency, many of us, to do things for an 61 00:04:18,080 --> 00:04:24,320 Speaker 1: extended period of time, sometimes decades that clearly do not 62 00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:26,799 Speaker 1: work for us. And when I say do not work, 63 00:04:27,720 --> 00:04:30,200 Speaker 1: I'm saying do not work on the understanding or the 64 00:04:30,240 --> 00:04:33,320 Speaker 1: premise that we want to be better. We don't want 65 00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:35,680 Speaker 1: to be unhealthy. We don't want destructive habits. We don't 66 00:04:35,720 --> 00:04:38,039 Speaker 1: want to overthink. We don't want to overdrink. We don't 67 00:04:38,040 --> 00:04:42,960 Speaker 1: want to overeat. We don't want to be the procrastinator. 68 00:04:43,040 --> 00:04:45,000 Speaker 1: We don't want to be the excuse maker. We don't 69 00:04:45,040 --> 00:04:47,279 Speaker 1: want to be the avoid or the denier. We want 70 00:04:47,279 --> 00:04:50,120 Speaker 1: to take ownership, we want to take charge. We want 71 00:04:50,120 --> 00:04:54,919 Speaker 1: to optimize our genetics, optimize our potential, optimize our IQ, 72 00:04:55,160 --> 00:05:01,119 Speaker 1: our intellectual capacity, optimize our creativity. We talk all the time, 73 00:05:01,279 --> 00:05:05,200 Speaker 1: especially in the personal development, self help space, human performance, 74 00:05:05,279 --> 00:05:11,280 Speaker 1: human behavior, we talk all the time about optimization, that is, 75 00:05:11,600 --> 00:05:17,520 Speaker 1: getting the most out of ourselves. But truly, truly, as 76 00:05:17,640 --> 00:05:20,400 Speaker 1: unpopular as this might be, or as uncomfortable as this 77 00:05:20,520 --> 00:05:22,960 Speaker 1: might be for some to hear, and I don't know you, 78 00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:26,080 Speaker 1: so clearly it's not personal, or clearly you're one of 79 00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:29,440 Speaker 1: many listenings, so I'm not targeting you. So all I 80 00:05:29,520 --> 00:05:31,920 Speaker 1: ask you to do is consider what I'm about to say, 81 00:05:31,920 --> 00:05:33,800 Speaker 1: and that what I'm about to say is that some 82 00:05:33,960 --> 00:05:37,760 Speaker 1: of you have probably been doing things that don't work 83 00:05:37,800 --> 00:05:40,120 Speaker 1: for a very long time, and maybe lots of things 84 00:05:40,200 --> 00:05:45,680 Speaker 1: that don't work. And if on some level you've kind 85 00:05:45,680 --> 00:05:48,240 Speaker 1: of resigned yourself to that fact and you're kind of 86 00:05:48,320 --> 00:05:53,320 Speaker 1: okay with it, then okay. However, if you're not okay 87 00:05:53,360 --> 00:05:56,080 Speaker 1: with it, if you are sick of being the one 88 00:05:56,200 --> 00:05:59,560 Speaker 1: day soon person, the almost person. I listen to so 89 00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:03,000 Speaker 1: much help and personal development, behavioral change, in neuroscience and 90 00:06:03,040 --> 00:06:06,520 Speaker 1: neuropsychology and nutrition, and I've read every fucking thing and 91 00:06:06,560 --> 00:06:08,479 Speaker 1: listen to every fucking thing. But here I am, and 92 00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:11,080 Speaker 1: I'm still in groundhole day. I'm still spinning my wheels, 93 00:06:11,800 --> 00:06:14,880 Speaker 1: I'm still going nowhere fast. I'm still in a perpetual 94 00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:20,080 Speaker 1: holding pattern of mediocrity and dissatisfaction and wasted time, talent, 95 00:06:20,160 --> 00:06:26,720 Speaker 1: and energy. If that's you, then then one you need 96 00:06:26,760 --> 00:06:31,400 Speaker 1: to figure out if you're really desperately, passionately committed to 97 00:06:31,760 --> 00:06:36,200 Speaker 1: changing that, and then two, whether or not you are 98 00:06:36,360 --> 00:06:41,400 Speaker 1: genuinely willing to pay the price of whatever is required 99 00:06:41,480 --> 00:06:45,080 Speaker 1: to create that shift on planet you. And this is 100 00:06:45,120 --> 00:06:48,360 Speaker 1: the big kind of gap. This is the chasm between 101 00:06:48,440 --> 00:06:51,280 Speaker 1: the idea and the action and the idea. Everyone's in 102 00:06:51,320 --> 00:06:54,479 Speaker 1: love with the idea. Everyone's in love with the idea 103 00:06:54,480 --> 00:06:58,000 Speaker 1: of better. Everyone's in love with the idea of lean 104 00:06:58,680 --> 00:07:05,120 Speaker 1: and strong and functional and successful and joyful and wealthy 105 00:07:05,720 --> 00:07:11,920 Speaker 1: and focused and fulfilled. We love all that shit because 106 00:07:12,560 --> 00:07:15,880 Speaker 1: who doesn't want that. We all want that or a 107 00:07:15,960 --> 00:07:20,720 Speaker 1: version of that. I rarely speak to people who say 108 00:07:20,960 --> 00:07:25,200 Speaker 1: I am totally content. I don't want anything else. This 109 00:07:25,360 --> 00:07:27,440 Speaker 1: is a whole other conversation out by the way. But 110 00:07:27,480 --> 00:07:30,440 Speaker 1: I'm there. I don't need any more. I'm happy. I'm content, 111 00:07:31,320 --> 00:07:35,040 Speaker 1: you know, for the most part, not anxious. Life's great. 112 00:07:36,680 --> 00:07:41,040 Speaker 1: That's generally not the case, and there's another conversation, as 113 00:07:41,080 --> 00:07:43,520 Speaker 1: I said, to be had around that. But for the moment, 114 00:07:43,960 --> 00:07:47,240 Speaker 1: I want to talk to you about whether or not 115 00:07:47,480 --> 00:07:50,560 Speaker 1: you are genuinely ready. Firstly, I'm going to operate on 116 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:54,840 Speaker 1: the assumption that you are at the very least interested 117 00:07:55,120 --> 00:07:59,120 Speaker 1: in getting unstuck, interested in getting out of your own way, 118 00:08:00,120 --> 00:08:03,880 Speaker 1: interested in stepping out of the rules and habits and 119 00:08:04,040 --> 00:08:08,560 Speaker 1: rituals and the perpetual holding pattern that you may be 120 00:08:08,680 --> 00:08:11,200 Speaker 1: in in some areas of your life that doesn't work 121 00:08:12,400 --> 00:08:17,400 Speaker 1: or don't work. To step out of that. So firstly, 122 00:08:17,480 --> 00:08:20,760 Speaker 1: let's talk about what are the drivers? What are the 123 00:08:20,840 --> 00:08:24,440 Speaker 1: things which cause us to get stuck? And so this 124 00:08:24,480 --> 00:08:28,120 Speaker 1: list is not in terms of significance or important. They 125 00:08:28,160 --> 00:08:34,280 Speaker 1: are all equally important. And some of these may relate 126 00:08:34,320 --> 00:08:37,719 Speaker 1: to you, some of them may not. It's seven or 127 00:08:37,760 --> 00:08:41,880 Speaker 1: eight or nine maybe, And some of them seem like 128 00:08:42,200 --> 00:08:45,679 Speaker 1: overly simple. Well, come on, Craig, I need more than that. 129 00:08:45,720 --> 00:08:49,640 Speaker 1: I need some deeper science. I need something more profound 130 00:08:49,720 --> 00:08:53,400 Speaker 1: than that. I need something more wise and insightful and 131 00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:59,480 Speaker 1: deep than laziness. For example, this sounds funny, but I 132 00:08:59,600 --> 00:09:02,240 Speaker 1: just meet people who are fucking lazy, and that's why 133 00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:07,520 Speaker 1: they're stuck. It's not even that they're scared, they're just lazy. 134 00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:11,720 Speaker 1: They just don't They just don't want to do the work. 135 00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:14,200 Speaker 1: They like the idea of the outcome, they like the 136 00:09:14,240 --> 00:09:17,440 Speaker 1: idea of the destination, but they are not ready to 137 00:09:17,480 --> 00:09:21,000 Speaker 1: get up every day and walk the path, or drive 138 00:09:21,040 --> 00:09:25,559 Speaker 1: the path, or take the path, or or take the journey. 139 00:09:26,040 --> 00:09:28,880 Speaker 1: Like the destination. The idea of the outcome is brilliant, 140 00:09:28,920 --> 00:09:33,559 Speaker 1: but the idea of doing what's required to create that outcome, 141 00:09:33,600 --> 00:09:40,200 Speaker 1: they're like, ah soon. And so you know, if laziness 142 00:09:40,280 --> 00:09:46,400 Speaker 1: is the overriding kind of factor. Then we're stuck. And 143 00:09:46,480 --> 00:09:49,760 Speaker 1: so that and I think sometimes that that kind of 144 00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:55,439 Speaker 1: general apathy, laziness, apathy, lack of motivation, perhaps they're tied 145 00:09:55,480 --> 00:10:01,640 Speaker 1: in together. And my just my thoughts. This is not science, 146 00:10:01,679 --> 00:10:06,400 Speaker 1: this is my thoughts. I think that, as I've said 147 00:10:06,400 --> 00:10:10,960 Speaker 1: a lot on this show, there's almost like a psychological 148 00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:13,679 Speaker 1: and or emotional tipping point for a lot of us, 149 00:10:14,480 --> 00:10:16,720 Speaker 1: and that is we kind of just go We just 150 00:10:16,840 --> 00:10:20,920 Speaker 1: kind of trudge along in blah, you know, in Blasville, 151 00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:24,680 Speaker 1: in mediocrity in three out of ten, and it's not 152 00:10:24,760 --> 00:10:27,760 Speaker 1: fulfilling or rewarding or awesome or joyful, but it's also 153 00:10:27,880 --> 00:10:32,000 Speaker 1: not complete shit. It's okay. There are moments of okayness, 154 00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:36,440 Speaker 1: and you know, until we get to that point where 155 00:10:36,480 --> 00:10:40,079 Speaker 1: we associate more pain with staying in it than getting 156 00:10:40,160 --> 00:10:43,000 Speaker 1: out of it, most of us will stay in it. 157 00:10:44,440 --> 00:10:49,640 Speaker 1: And you can see as an observer of human behavior, 158 00:10:49,679 --> 00:10:57,400 Speaker 1: you can see people staying in things, sometimes relationships or jobs, 159 00:10:57,559 --> 00:11:01,560 Speaker 1: or situations or circumstances or environments, patterns or habits, staying 160 00:11:01,600 --> 00:11:05,280 Speaker 1: in things that really don't work, but on some level 161 00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:08,360 Speaker 1: they're scared of the option they're scared of the work, 162 00:11:08,400 --> 00:11:11,400 Speaker 1: They're scared of the unknown, They're scared of the uncertainty. 163 00:11:12,040 --> 00:11:15,040 Speaker 1: Should they shut the door on that thing and step 164 00:11:15,080 --> 00:11:19,040 Speaker 1: away and head in a new direction with no safety 165 00:11:19,080 --> 00:11:27,120 Speaker 1: in it? So fear comes into it, laziness, apathy, fear, mindset. Now, 166 00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:30,000 Speaker 1: when I talk about mindset, clearly we could and we 167 00:11:30,080 --> 00:11:33,720 Speaker 1: have done many shows on this, but it's you know, 168 00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:37,880 Speaker 1: being aware that my mind is not in charge of me. 169 00:11:37,960 --> 00:11:40,600 Speaker 1: I am in charge of my mind. And yes I'm 170 00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:44,400 Speaker 1: not talking about my brain here. My brain is different, 171 00:11:44,960 --> 00:11:47,760 Speaker 1: is a different animal. But in terms of managing regulating 172 00:11:47,760 --> 00:11:50,840 Speaker 1: my thoughts, what I pay attention to, what I focus on? 173 00:11:51,320 --> 00:11:54,400 Speaker 1: Am I the problem person? Am I the solution person? 174 00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:58,440 Speaker 1: Am I making good decisions? How do I process the 175 00:11:58,480 --> 00:12:02,320 Speaker 1: world around me? What is the thing that happened? What 176 00:12:02,480 --> 00:12:05,280 Speaker 1: is my story that I'm telling myself about the thing 177 00:12:05,679 --> 00:12:09,120 Speaker 1: that happened? Why do I think the way that I think? 178 00:12:09,240 --> 00:12:13,480 Speaker 1: Where does my thinking come from? What role does my 179 00:12:13,679 --> 00:12:20,080 Speaker 1: programming play in my current internal paradigm, in my internal framework? 180 00:12:20,760 --> 00:12:23,840 Speaker 1: What role does my programming play in terms of how 181 00:12:23,880 --> 00:12:26,040 Speaker 1: I live and what I do and my values and 182 00:12:26,080 --> 00:12:31,720 Speaker 1: so on? So, becoming aware of these internal kind of 183 00:12:31,840 --> 00:12:37,160 Speaker 1: drivers that influence perhaps determine whether or not we stay 184 00:12:37,240 --> 00:12:43,760 Speaker 1: stuck or we move self doubt. Self doubt is like 185 00:12:44,280 --> 00:12:50,080 Speaker 1: almost a pandemic, you know, aversion to discomfort spoken about 186 00:12:50,080 --> 00:12:52,240 Speaker 1: a lot of times. People want the work, they don't 187 00:12:52,240 --> 00:12:57,120 Speaker 1: want the pain, self limiting thinking, crap, self esteem, and 188 00:12:57,200 --> 00:13:02,240 Speaker 1: so on. And the truth is that it's some stage. 189 00:13:02,640 --> 00:13:05,000 Speaker 1: Should we really want to move forward, we need to 190 00:13:05,040 --> 00:13:08,000 Speaker 1: feel what we feel. Feel lazy, feel not good enough, 191 00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:11,920 Speaker 1: feel like a fraud, feel like an impostor, but nonetheless 192 00:13:11,960 --> 00:13:17,480 Speaker 1: start the ball rolling. I've spent most of my life 193 00:13:17,720 --> 00:13:21,240 Speaker 1: still feeling like the insecure fat kid that got picked 194 00:13:21,320 --> 00:13:24,040 Speaker 1: lass for every sporting team. At some stages, I feel 195 00:13:24,040 --> 00:13:26,600 Speaker 1: like that. I don't feel like literally that, I just 196 00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:32,840 Speaker 1: that those emotional and psychological remnants live on. You know. 197 00:13:32,960 --> 00:13:35,160 Speaker 1: I could be in the middle of, like right now, 198 00:13:35,240 --> 00:13:38,160 Speaker 1: sharing this with you, at the same time feeling like, oh, 199 00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:40,120 Speaker 1: this is shit and no one's going to enjoy it. 200 00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:43,640 Speaker 1: Like that. Self doubt never fully goes away from me, 201 00:13:44,400 --> 00:13:47,439 Speaker 1: that imposter syndrome, not good enough, not smart enough, not 202 00:13:47,559 --> 00:13:52,080 Speaker 1: academic enough, not lean enough, not likable enough, not fucking 203 00:13:52,120 --> 00:13:55,280 Speaker 1: it what. That stuff never fully goes away. It doesn't 204 00:13:55,360 --> 00:14:00,560 Speaker 1: dominate me, it doesn't render me paralyzed. But do I 205 00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:05,360 Speaker 1: ever feel supremely confident? Never? I never feel that I 206 00:14:05,360 --> 00:14:09,800 Speaker 1: feel somewhat confident. I feel content and pretty calm and 207 00:14:09,880 --> 00:14:14,200 Speaker 1: pretty satisfied most of the time. But what I know 208 00:14:15,040 --> 00:14:21,200 Speaker 1: is that the psychological awareness that I can do things, 209 00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:25,520 Speaker 1: I'm not useless. I can succeed, I can write well, 210 00:14:25,560 --> 00:14:28,240 Speaker 1: I can speak well, I can talk to an audience. 211 00:14:28,480 --> 00:14:32,840 Speaker 1: I can build a business and brand, while also knowing 212 00:14:32,880 --> 00:14:34,680 Speaker 1: that I've fucked up a lot of things and all 213 00:14:34,680 --> 00:14:39,120 Speaker 1: of that. But that knowledge that I can do well, oh, 214 00:14:39,240 --> 00:14:44,120 Speaker 1: exists at the same time with those feelings, those emotions 215 00:14:44,120 --> 00:14:49,000 Speaker 1: of inadequacy and self doubt and periodic self loathing. And 216 00:14:49,040 --> 00:14:53,840 Speaker 1: that's not weird or broken or terrible. That's normal. Even 217 00:14:53,880 --> 00:14:56,120 Speaker 1: the people that I've worked with that many of you 218 00:14:56,160 --> 00:14:59,080 Speaker 1: would know that are high performers in the in the 219 00:14:59,160 --> 00:15:03,920 Speaker 1: areas of thoughts or politics, or media or entertainment or 220 00:15:04,440 --> 00:15:07,280 Speaker 1: the creative arts. Some of the people that I've worked 221 00:15:07,320 --> 00:15:13,480 Speaker 1: with that are wildly successful are also insecure, also riddled 222 00:15:13,520 --> 00:15:18,480 Speaker 1: with self doubt, also have self esteem issues, also could 223 00:15:18,520 --> 00:15:23,320 Speaker 1: talk themselves into analysis paralysis in a second. So if 224 00:15:23,360 --> 00:15:26,320 Speaker 1: any of that is you. That is not a reason 225 00:15:27,120 --> 00:15:33,000 Speaker 1: to not succeed. You can be scared and successful. You 226 00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:38,240 Speaker 1: can be inherently kind of naturally lazy while choosing to 227 00:15:38,320 --> 00:15:42,080 Speaker 1: be active and proactive. You can do that. You can 228 00:15:42,240 --> 00:15:49,120 Speaker 1: override things. My genetic default setting is endomorphic, which is 229 00:15:49,160 --> 00:15:52,960 Speaker 1: I gain fat very easily. But my genetics don't need 230 00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:56,920 Speaker 1: to be my destiny because what I'll look, feel, and 231 00:15:56,960 --> 00:16:00,840 Speaker 1: function like is about twenty to thirty percent about my genetics. 232 00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:03,720 Speaker 1: The rest is about what I do, and what I 233 00:16:03,840 --> 00:16:06,680 Speaker 1: do is optional. What I eat is optional, how I 234 00:16:06,760 --> 00:16:10,560 Speaker 1: live is optional. How I move my body, whether or 235 00:16:10,600 --> 00:16:12,960 Speaker 1: not I drink booze or use drugs, or how I 236 00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:15,680 Speaker 1: sleep or how much I sleep, or how I put 237 00:16:15,720 --> 00:16:20,880 Speaker 1: all this shit together. My over arching values, my overarching 238 00:16:20,960 --> 00:16:28,440 Speaker 1: operating system for life. There are We can rationalize anything 239 00:16:29,040 --> 00:16:31,880 Speaker 1: if we want, if we want to come up with 240 00:16:31,920 --> 00:16:34,840 Speaker 1: a reason why we're not succeeding, and life's not fair 241 00:16:34,920 --> 00:16:37,320 Speaker 1: and my mum did this or my dad. And I'm 242 00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:39,880 Speaker 1: not trying to be disrespectful to people who've been through 243 00:16:39,960 --> 00:16:43,400 Speaker 1: legit trauma. Of course we recognize that and respect that. 244 00:16:43,520 --> 00:16:46,320 Speaker 1: But at the same time, guess what a lot of 245 00:16:46,360 --> 00:16:49,160 Speaker 1: people have been through trauma, and a lot of people 246 00:16:49,160 --> 00:16:53,040 Speaker 1: have been through some horrible shit. I interviewed Joelsarti the 247 00:16:53,120 --> 00:16:57,080 Speaker 1: other day, who's speaking on our program, who went to Afghanistan, 248 00:16:57,240 --> 00:17:00,320 Speaker 1: served for Australia in the military, spent eight months there 249 00:17:01,800 --> 00:17:05,000 Speaker 1: on an active tour, came back, was having a quick 250 00:17:05,040 --> 00:17:08,400 Speaker 1: break before he went back to Afghanistan, fell over, railing, 251 00:17:08,680 --> 00:17:12,120 Speaker 1: railing on some stairs, broke his neck. Broke his neck 252 00:17:13,119 --> 00:17:15,639 Speaker 1: is a quadriplegic. Now, if anyone's got a reason to 253 00:17:15,680 --> 00:17:18,560 Speaker 1: get stuck, it's that, dude. If you want to rationalize 254 00:17:18,560 --> 00:17:22,600 Speaker 1: doing nothing, feeling sorry for yourself, being in a holding pattern, 255 00:17:23,160 --> 00:17:25,520 Speaker 1: you know, getting stuck in all kinds of ways, you 256 00:17:25,560 --> 00:17:28,560 Speaker 1: would look at, at least from the outside looking in, 257 00:17:28,640 --> 00:17:32,000 Speaker 1: and look at that scenario and what happened to Jijol 258 00:17:32,040 --> 00:17:34,040 Speaker 1: and go, man, I get it, I get it. But 259 00:17:34,119 --> 00:17:37,959 Speaker 1: guess what, He's not stuck in the middle of the 260 00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:40,280 Speaker 1: mess and the mayhem and the pain and the dysfunction 261 00:17:40,960 --> 00:17:45,600 Speaker 1: and the physiological limitations and all of the challenges, massive 262 00:17:45,760 --> 00:17:48,879 Speaker 1: challenges of adapting to a brand new life in a 263 00:17:48,880 --> 00:17:51,000 Speaker 1: body that doesn't work as it once did. In the 264 00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:54,760 Speaker 1: middle of all of that, he's growing and he's learning, 265 00:17:54,760 --> 00:17:57,880 Speaker 1: and he's developing skills and insight and awareness, and he's 266 00:17:57,880 --> 00:18:03,560 Speaker 1: courageous and he's doing fucking amazing shit. And you can 267 00:18:03,680 --> 00:18:07,080 Speaker 1: do too. We all can. It doesn't mean we can 268 00:18:07,119 --> 00:18:10,080 Speaker 1: all do anything. We can't all run one hundred meters 269 00:18:10,080 --> 00:18:13,040 Speaker 1: in ten seconds, we can't all win a Grammy. We 270 00:18:13,080 --> 00:18:17,040 Speaker 1: can't all become president or prime minister. We can't just practically, 271 00:18:17,080 --> 00:18:21,840 Speaker 1: we can't because we can't have a million prime ministers 272 00:18:21,880 --> 00:18:24,639 Speaker 1: at once. But there's a lot of stuff that we 273 00:18:24,680 --> 00:18:26,960 Speaker 1: can do. There's a lot of stuff that we can do. 274 00:18:28,720 --> 00:18:32,280 Speaker 1: So let's have a look at some ideas on how 275 00:18:32,280 --> 00:18:35,600 Speaker 1: to get unstuck. So I've got a list for you, 276 00:18:35,640 --> 00:18:39,840 Speaker 1: because you know the occasional list doesn't hurt. Number one is, 277 00:18:39,880 --> 00:18:45,119 Speaker 1: recognize your stuckness. Like that, Recognize that you are stuck, 278 00:18:45,240 --> 00:18:47,679 Speaker 1: that you are trapped, that you are in a holding pattern, 279 00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:50,480 Speaker 1: that you are spinning your wheels, whatever metaphor you want 280 00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:54,480 Speaker 1: to to use, but recognize that you are stuck and 281 00:18:54,600 --> 00:19:00,760 Speaker 1: identify the cause. So for a very long time, for example, 282 00:19:01,720 --> 00:19:07,320 Speaker 1: with my body, my starkness, my holding pattern, my inability 283 00:19:08,440 --> 00:19:11,920 Speaker 1: to look or feel or perform or achieve the level 284 00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:20,720 Speaker 1: of health and performance, and body composition that I wanted 285 00:19:21,480 --> 00:19:26,919 Speaker 1: for me. The cause was food, specifically, my relationship with food, specifically, 286 00:19:27,320 --> 00:19:31,320 Speaker 1: how I thought about food, how I chose food, how 287 00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:35,879 Speaker 1: I behaved with food and around food, how I socialized, 288 00:19:35,920 --> 00:19:40,800 Speaker 1: how I bullshitted myself with food, how I lied to people. 289 00:19:41,920 --> 00:19:44,119 Speaker 1: People would ask me about what I eat, and I 290 00:19:44,160 --> 00:19:46,800 Speaker 1: would be too embarrassed at times to tell them really 291 00:19:46,800 --> 00:19:49,040 Speaker 1: what I ate sometimes, so I would make up some 292 00:19:49,119 --> 00:19:53,040 Speaker 1: bullshit to sound good, And so I was in a 293 00:19:53,080 --> 00:19:56,480 Speaker 1: holding pattern. I was stuck. I had this toxic, destructive 294 00:19:56,560 --> 00:19:59,600 Speaker 1: relationship with food. By the way, food wasn't the problem 295 00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:03,720 Speaker 1: the problem. It's just that food was the epicenter of 296 00:20:03,840 --> 00:20:08,119 Speaker 1: the problem. And so that was for me, you know, 297 00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:10,640 Speaker 1: owning up and stepping up and being honest and raw 298 00:20:10,680 --> 00:20:12,840 Speaker 1: and real. And the reason that I share that this 299 00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:15,280 Speaker 1: was part of my journey is because I know other 300 00:20:15,320 --> 00:20:18,320 Speaker 1: people do the same. I know that I don't live 301 00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:21,840 Speaker 1: on an island in this respect. I'm not Robinson Cruz. 302 00:20:21,880 --> 00:20:24,400 Speaker 1: I'm not the only person to have done this. I've 303 00:20:24,440 --> 00:20:27,440 Speaker 1: spoken to maybe thousands of people who have very very 304 00:20:27,480 --> 00:20:32,879 Speaker 1: complicated relationships with their body, very complicated relationships with food 305 00:20:32,960 --> 00:20:36,679 Speaker 1: and with exercise and with self esteem and with body 306 00:20:36,680 --> 00:20:40,359 Speaker 1: image and body dysmorphia. And I think the starting point 307 00:20:40,440 --> 00:20:43,480 Speaker 1: for a lot of us, the unstuck getting unstuck starting 308 00:20:43,520 --> 00:20:48,080 Speaker 1: point is just being fucking honest. I eat shit. I 309 00:20:48,119 --> 00:20:53,840 Speaker 1: don't need the end not ah, yeah, but my genetics. 310 00:20:53,880 --> 00:20:56,800 Speaker 1: But yeah, but you know, I didn't want to offend anyone, 311 00:20:56,840 --> 00:20:58,920 Speaker 1: but oh it was all I could get my hands on. Ah, 312 00:20:58,960 --> 00:20:59,520 Speaker 1: but it was my. 313 00:20:59,480 --> 00:21:03,080 Speaker 2: Birthday, but it was it was you know, and you're 314 00:21:03,119 --> 00:21:06,800 Speaker 2: fifty there, and now you're fifty and you're still telling 315 00:21:06,840 --> 00:21:10,960 Speaker 2: yourself why you're not doing the things that. 316 00:21:10,880 --> 00:21:15,480 Speaker 1: You allegedly want to do. Like, you will not accidentally 317 00:21:15,560 --> 00:21:18,119 Speaker 1: get in great shape. You will not accidentally have a 318 00:21:18,160 --> 00:21:23,360 Speaker 1: fucking awesome body, awesome health, amazing immune system. You will 319 00:21:23,359 --> 00:21:26,760 Speaker 1: not accidentally run a fucking marathon or whatever it is 320 00:21:26,760 --> 00:21:28,959 Speaker 1: that or build a business or build a brand, or 321 00:21:29,520 --> 00:21:34,359 Speaker 1: do an undergrad degree or overcoming it. You'll not accidentally 322 00:21:34,400 --> 00:21:38,080 Speaker 1: do these things. We need to acknowledge the reality of us. 323 00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:42,280 Speaker 1: This is why I'm doing a part of why I'm 324 00:21:42,280 --> 00:21:46,080 Speaker 1: doing a PhD in self awareness, literally, it is because 325 00:21:46,160 --> 00:21:49,200 Speaker 1: self awareness with so much of this stuff is the 326 00:21:49,240 --> 00:21:55,040 Speaker 1: starting point. Not self loathing, not self hate, self awareness, 327 00:21:55,440 --> 00:21:58,360 Speaker 1: This is what I'm doing. Okay, my life's not working 328 00:21:58,480 --> 00:22:02,840 Speaker 1: in this text. What part of the problem am I? 329 00:22:03,840 --> 00:22:06,680 Speaker 1: It's not to say you're always the totality of the problem, 330 00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:09,639 Speaker 1: but let's just be brave for a moment and courageous 331 00:22:09,640 --> 00:22:12,159 Speaker 1: and grown up and mature and let's go, yeah, look, 332 00:22:12,760 --> 00:22:16,560 Speaker 1: at least I'm part of the problem, all right. Number 333 00:22:16,600 --> 00:22:19,719 Speaker 1: two is this identify the thing that you're not doing 334 00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:25,920 Speaker 1: that you should be doing. So what might that be 335 00:22:26,000 --> 00:22:31,640 Speaker 1: for you? Maybe that is maybe that is you need 336 00:22:31,680 --> 00:22:34,520 Speaker 1: to study thirty minutes every morning. Maybe that is you 337 00:22:34,600 --> 00:22:38,919 Speaker 1: need to start having a cold shower every day. Maybe 338 00:22:38,960 --> 00:22:42,520 Speaker 1: that is you need to commit to some I don't 339 00:22:42,520 --> 00:22:46,080 Speaker 1: know what it is, doesn't matter. It could be something 340 00:22:46,080 --> 00:22:48,879 Speaker 1: to do with your kids or your partner. Could be 341 00:22:48,960 --> 00:22:51,320 Speaker 1: something to do with your career. Could be something to 342 00:22:51,359 --> 00:22:54,480 Speaker 1: do with your physical, mental, or emotional health. It could 343 00:22:54,560 --> 00:22:59,000 Speaker 1: be something to do with a toxic relationship that you 344 00:22:59,080 --> 00:23:01,400 Speaker 1: need to deal with. It could be something to do 345 00:23:01,480 --> 00:23:07,439 Speaker 1: with your lifestyle. It could be a million things. But 346 00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:11,000 Speaker 1: what is the thing that you're not doing that you 347 00:23:11,119 --> 00:23:15,520 Speaker 1: know you should be. Number three is kind of an 348 00:23:15,560 --> 00:23:21,080 Speaker 1: expansion of that, and that is to do a stock 349 00:23:21,160 --> 00:23:28,280 Speaker 1: take or audit on what's working and what's not working 350 00:23:28,359 --> 00:23:33,560 Speaker 1: on planet you. And this is not something that you 351 00:23:33,680 --> 00:23:37,520 Speaker 1: do in three minutes driving to work, listening to the radio, 352 00:23:37,800 --> 00:23:41,680 Speaker 1: looking for a park. This is something that I think 353 00:23:41,760 --> 00:23:44,640 Speaker 1: really we need to take seriously about when we talk 354 00:23:44,680 --> 00:23:51,400 Speaker 1: about living consciously. We spoke before about unconscious stuff and 355 00:23:51,440 --> 00:23:55,160 Speaker 1: how you know. In many ways, for a range of reasons, 356 00:23:55,760 --> 00:23:59,439 Speaker 1: many of us are periodic passengers in our own life. 357 00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:03,400 Speaker 1: That is, life has its own energy, Life has its 358 00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:10,320 Speaker 1: own life force, Life has its own momentum, and life 359 00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:15,919 Speaker 1: happens despite us. Life keeps going on, and the things 360 00:24:15,920 --> 00:24:18,040 Speaker 1: that we are in the middle of have their own 361 00:24:18,080 --> 00:24:22,119 Speaker 1: momentum and energy as well. And sometimes we need to 362 00:24:22,119 --> 00:24:25,840 Speaker 1: get out of that river, that ever flowing river that 363 00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:29,119 Speaker 1: we are sitting in our canoe just being swept, that 364 00:24:29,119 --> 00:24:31,000 Speaker 1: we need to paddle to the side. We need to 365 00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:34,159 Speaker 1: get to the metaphoric bank, pull up our canoe and 366 00:24:34,200 --> 00:24:37,640 Speaker 1: our paddle, sit on the metaphoric rock and just take 367 00:24:37,680 --> 00:24:41,320 Speaker 1: a minute. Take a minute, get out of the river, 368 00:24:41,400 --> 00:24:43,639 Speaker 1: get out of the momentum, get out of the busyness, 369 00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:46,720 Speaker 1: get out of the never endingness, even if it's for 370 00:24:46,760 --> 00:24:52,160 Speaker 1: thirty minutes to sit. No phone no computer, no distractions, 371 00:24:52,320 --> 00:24:58,359 Speaker 1: just you thinking about how's my life going? How is 372 00:24:58,720 --> 00:25:07,160 Speaker 1: my life going, how's my body going? What about my rituals? 373 00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:12,800 Speaker 1: What about my social life? What about my sleep? What 374 00:25:12,920 --> 00:25:15,640 Speaker 1: about my self talk? What about my mental health? How's 375 00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:20,320 Speaker 1: that going on? What's that about? What about? What about 376 00:25:20,320 --> 00:25:23,600 Speaker 1: the results that I'm producing? Are they the results I 377 00:25:23,640 --> 00:25:25,960 Speaker 1: want to produce? If not, why not? What am I doing? 378 00:25:26,600 --> 00:25:30,639 Speaker 1: What could I do better? One of the challenges for 379 00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:38,440 Speaker 1: us is that, obviously my world view is subjective. All 380 00:25:38,480 --> 00:25:42,480 Speaker 1: of my experiences are influenced by the goings on in 381 00:25:42,560 --> 00:25:46,040 Speaker 1: my external world, but ultimately created by me. And when 382 00:25:46,080 --> 00:25:48,119 Speaker 1: I say me, I say my brain, my mind, my 383 00:25:48,240 --> 00:25:53,480 Speaker 1: data processing center. I am always doing a subjective assessment, 384 00:25:54,040 --> 00:25:59,720 Speaker 1: an interpretation of objective things. Something happens to me around 385 00:25:59,760 --> 00:26:04,400 Speaker 1: me despite me, a person, a situation and outcome, a result, 386 00:26:04,840 --> 00:26:09,520 Speaker 1: the weather, some piece of news. Then what I do, 387 00:26:09,600 --> 00:26:13,840 Speaker 1: automatically and almost unconsciously, is I break it down and 388 00:26:13,920 --> 00:26:18,760 Speaker 1: I give it meaning. And one of the challenges for us, 389 00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:21,639 Speaker 1: in the continuity and the never endingness of the human 390 00:26:21,720 --> 00:26:30,320 Speaker 1: experience and the never ending stream of information and energy 391 00:26:30,560 --> 00:26:35,200 Speaker 1: and people and events, is to be able to find 392 00:26:35,280 --> 00:26:40,760 Speaker 1: some space, some metaphoric space, sometimes some literal space to say, well, 393 00:26:40,800 --> 00:26:45,400 Speaker 1: here I am, I'm thirty, I'm forty, I'm fifty. How 394 00:26:45,440 --> 00:26:49,440 Speaker 1: long have I been thinking about changing these things? How 395 00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:53,359 Speaker 1: many times have I had the same story or told 396 00:26:53,400 --> 00:26:56,520 Speaker 1: myself the same or others the same story about the 397 00:26:56,560 --> 00:26:59,119 Speaker 1: same things that I'm going to change soon. I'm going 398 00:26:59,160 --> 00:27:02,959 Speaker 1: to I'm doing it soon. But here I am and 399 00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:08,160 Speaker 1: now I'm fifty and I'm not doing it. What are 400 00:27:08,160 --> 00:27:12,840 Speaker 1: the things that on planet me are not working? And 401 00:27:12,880 --> 00:27:14,399 Speaker 1: what are the things that are working? What are my 402 00:27:14,480 --> 00:27:17,080 Speaker 1: results telling me? What's my life telling me? What are 403 00:27:17,080 --> 00:27:22,479 Speaker 1: my relationships telling me? Things won't accidentally get better. You 404 00:27:22,560 --> 00:27:27,480 Speaker 1: and I will do the audit. We will observe the thing, 405 00:27:27,600 --> 00:27:30,280 Speaker 1: recognize the thing, We'll take ownership of the thing, and 406 00:27:30,320 --> 00:27:32,439 Speaker 1: then will work to change the thing that needs to 407 00:27:32,480 --> 00:27:36,280 Speaker 1: be changed, or we won't. That's up to you, that's 408 00:27:36,359 --> 00:27:39,160 Speaker 1: up to me. Number four on my how to get 409 00:27:39,240 --> 00:27:43,080 Speaker 1: Unstuck list is choose to do what scares you. That 410 00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:44,960 Speaker 1: is the thing that you need to do to create 411 00:27:44,960 --> 00:27:47,639 Speaker 1: the outcome you want. I'm not just talking about what 412 00:27:47,720 --> 00:27:49,359 Speaker 1: scares you running in front of a truck. Do that, 413 00:27:49,400 --> 00:27:51,919 Speaker 1: And no, of course not I'm talking about strategic, intelligent, 414 00:27:52,600 --> 00:27:58,479 Speaker 1: purpose driven facing your fear. Be courageous. Your goal is 415 00:27:58,520 --> 00:28:02,360 Speaker 1: not to be fearless. Your goal is not to eradicate 416 00:28:02,440 --> 00:28:07,760 Speaker 1: all self doubt. Your goal is, despite your fear, despite 417 00:28:07,800 --> 00:28:12,639 Speaker 1: your overthinking, despite your self doubt, despite your insecurity, do 418 00:28:12,800 --> 00:28:19,560 Speaker 1: something really fucking brave because you can. Because you can. 419 00:28:19,640 --> 00:28:22,560 Speaker 1: I know you don't want to sometimes, I know that 420 00:28:22,720 --> 00:28:26,159 Speaker 1: you doubt yourself. At the very least, you're going to 421 00:28:26,200 --> 00:28:29,560 Speaker 1: have an experience. You might fuck up, you might fall 422 00:28:29,560 --> 00:28:33,359 Speaker 1: down metaphorically, you might get it wrong, and then at 423 00:28:33,400 --> 00:28:36,240 Speaker 1: the end of that you have a challenge. By the way, 424 00:28:36,280 --> 00:28:38,240 Speaker 1: you might get it right, might be fucking great. Whatever 425 00:28:38,280 --> 00:28:41,600 Speaker 1: the outcome is, you're going to learn something. You're going 426 00:28:41,680 --> 00:28:44,800 Speaker 1: to learn something. I've spent years doing things that didn't work. 427 00:28:44,840 --> 00:28:48,600 Speaker 1: In fact, most of the things that I tried, at 428 00:28:48,680 --> 00:28:52,040 Speaker 1: least initially didn't work, or I got a four out 429 00:28:52,080 --> 00:28:54,720 Speaker 1: of ten, not a ten out of ten outcome, sometimes 430 00:28:54,760 --> 00:28:58,880 Speaker 1: a minus two out of ten. And that is because 431 00:28:59,320 --> 00:29:03,040 Speaker 1: I knew. I knew that I well, I didn't know. 432 00:29:03,120 --> 00:29:06,280 Speaker 1: Actually I thought that I could probably do this thing eventually, 433 00:29:06,320 --> 00:29:08,440 Speaker 1: But in the moment, at the start, I knew that 434 00:29:08,480 --> 00:29:10,560 Speaker 1: I wouldn't win. I knew that I wouldn't get it right. 435 00:29:10,920 --> 00:29:12,800 Speaker 1: I knew that it wouldn't be perfect. I knew that 436 00:29:12,840 --> 00:29:15,560 Speaker 1: it would be flawed. But I also knew that that 437 00:29:15,680 --> 00:29:20,240 Speaker 1: imperfection and that flaw and that three or two out 438 00:29:20,240 --> 00:29:24,120 Speaker 1: of ten result was a pathway. It was a conduit 439 00:29:24,240 --> 00:29:29,400 Speaker 1: to understanding and skill and development and growth and better outcomes. 440 00:29:30,560 --> 00:29:33,480 Speaker 1: It's in the middle of doing the things that scare 441 00:29:33,560 --> 00:29:37,120 Speaker 1: me that I get better. It's in the middle of 442 00:29:37,200 --> 00:29:40,640 Speaker 1: doing the things that I'm uncomfortable with, that I'm unfamiliar with, 443 00:29:40,800 --> 00:29:44,160 Speaker 1: around which there is little or no certainty. It's in 444 00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:46,680 Speaker 1: the middle of that that I become the best version 445 00:29:46,720 --> 00:29:50,920 Speaker 1: of me. It's in the middle of letting fear control 446 00:29:51,000 --> 00:29:54,480 Speaker 1: me that I become the worst version of me. Because 447 00:29:54,520 --> 00:29:57,360 Speaker 1: if I don't manage my fear, it will manage me. 448 00:29:58,560 --> 00:30:02,320 Speaker 1: And I do want to not be are a prisoner 449 00:30:02,440 --> 00:30:08,560 Speaker 1: in my own emotions, and neither do you. Number five 450 00:30:08,720 --> 00:30:15,760 Speaker 1: is practical, not sexy, not mind blowing. Number five is 451 00:30:15,840 --> 00:30:18,640 Speaker 1: right yourself for to do list, and that might just 452 00:30:18,720 --> 00:30:20,920 Speaker 1: be two things, that might be two hundred things. Let's 453 00:30:21,160 --> 00:30:24,760 Speaker 1: probably not go with two hundred right yourself for to 454 00:30:24,800 --> 00:30:29,560 Speaker 1: do list? And fully commit to it, Like fully, this 455 00:30:29,760 --> 00:30:33,920 Speaker 1: is me, Now, this is what I do. Now, remove 456 00:30:33,960 --> 00:30:38,280 Speaker 1: the escape clause and the safety net, take away the 457 00:30:38,400 --> 00:30:44,200 Speaker 1: get out a jail card. Tell somebody else, perhaps, so 458 00:30:44,280 --> 00:30:51,280 Speaker 1: that now you've got a level of accountability. Take the 459 00:30:51,320 --> 00:30:53,880 Speaker 1: emotion whatever it is that you feel, the thing that 460 00:30:53,920 --> 00:30:56,600 Speaker 1: you want to do, that you're excited about but scared 461 00:30:56,960 --> 00:31:01,360 Speaker 1: to do. And then with that emotion, that excitement, that goal, 462 00:31:01,440 --> 00:31:04,520 Speaker 1: that vision, that dream, that thing that you want to change, 463 00:31:04,560 --> 00:31:07,080 Speaker 1: that thing that you are moved to change or do 464 00:31:07,280 --> 00:31:10,880 Speaker 1: or be or create, take that emotion and wrap it 465 00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:13,760 Speaker 1: in a strategy, Wrap it in a plan, Wrap it 466 00:31:13,800 --> 00:31:18,320 Speaker 1: in logic, Wrap it in accountability, wrap it in wrap it. 467 00:31:18,440 --> 00:31:23,800 Speaker 1: I'm not saying rabid wrap wrap wrap it in something 468 00:31:23,960 --> 00:31:32,400 Speaker 1: which is almost impossible for you to not operationalize. In 469 00:31:32,440 --> 00:31:38,040 Speaker 1: other words, do so many people set themselves kind of 470 00:31:38,160 --> 00:31:42,920 Speaker 1: a goal or write themselves to do list, but they're 471 00:31:42,920 --> 00:31:47,920 Speaker 1: on no level committed. Like if I'm fully committed to something, 472 00:31:48,720 --> 00:31:53,600 Speaker 1: fully committed, I mean mentally, emotionally, behaviorally, one boots and all. 473 00:31:54,840 --> 00:31:59,160 Speaker 1: Then on the days when I don't feel disciplined, I'm 474 00:31:59,200 --> 00:32:02,960 Speaker 1: not you know, ah, inspired, I'm not motivated, I'm not 475 00:32:03,000 --> 00:32:06,360 Speaker 1: feeling it. I'm not loving it. It doesn't matter because 476 00:32:06,360 --> 00:32:10,520 Speaker 1: I'm fully committed. So barring sickness or injury or some 477 00:32:10,760 --> 00:32:14,480 Speaker 1: unavoidable reason, but barring that, I'm doing it. And the 478 00:32:14,520 --> 00:32:18,120 Speaker 1: reason that I'm doing it is because I am fully 479 00:32:18,120 --> 00:32:21,320 Speaker 1: invested and fully committed to this process to create the 480 00:32:21,360 --> 00:32:24,560 Speaker 1: thing I want to create. And we need to get 481 00:32:24,600 --> 00:32:30,120 Speaker 1: our head around the idea that this won't be fun, quick, easy, 482 00:32:30,240 --> 00:32:33,920 Speaker 1: or painless. And not only is that okay, it's fucking 483 00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:35,920 Speaker 1: great because in the middle of all of that, I'm 484 00:32:36,000 --> 00:32:38,720 Speaker 1: still going to I'm going to create better results anyway 485 00:32:38,720 --> 00:32:41,440 Speaker 1: because I'm doing the workhead down, bum up, I'm focused. 486 00:32:41,840 --> 00:32:44,600 Speaker 1: But also the bonus and maybe even the real gift 487 00:32:44,600 --> 00:32:46,200 Speaker 1: in the middle of all of this, is that I'm 488 00:32:46,200 --> 00:32:51,440 Speaker 1: becoming better. I am making me a stronger me, a 489 00:32:51,520 --> 00:32:55,040 Speaker 1: better me, a more resilient me, a more capable me, 490 00:32:55,720 --> 00:32:59,600 Speaker 1: a more resourceful creative me, and hopefully a better me 491 00:33:00,120 --> 00:33:03,640 Speaker 1: others a better leader, a better communicator, a better dad, 492 00:33:03,680 --> 00:33:06,760 Speaker 1: a better mum, a better sister, a better brother, a 493 00:33:06,800 --> 00:33:11,160 Speaker 1: better friend, a better problem solver, a better creator. Like 494 00:33:11,280 --> 00:33:14,880 Speaker 1: this is kind of the refiner's fire, where we put 495 00:33:14,960 --> 00:33:18,720 Speaker 1: ourselves in the fire of that challenge and we come 496 00:33:18,760 --> 00:33:24,440 Speaker 1: out the other side. Ah. So that was five and six. 497 00:33:24,720 --> 00:33:31,360 Speaker 1: Number seven is extricate yourself from people who perpetuate your stuckness. Oh, 498 00:33:31,760 --> 00:33:35,800 Speaker 1: I'll say that again. Extricate yourself from the people who 499 00:33:36,160 --> 00:33:42,600 Speaker 1: from people who perpetuate your stuckness. In other words, as 500 00:33:42,680 --> 00:33:44,560 Speaker 1: much as possible. And I know there are a lot 501 00:33:44,600 --> 00:33:47,120 Speaker 1: of variables around this. You say, yeah, cool, Craig, but 502 00:33:47,200 --> 00:33:49,680 Speaker 1: what if one of those people is my partner, or 503 00:33:49,720 --> 00:33:53,440 Speaker 1: my brother, or my sister or my Barcelma. I get it. 504 00:33:53,880 --> 00:33:56,040 Speaker 1: And so that's why this is global, That's why this 505 00:33:56,160 --> 00:33:58,920 Speaker 1: is broad and general. But as much as possible. When 506 00:33:58,960 --> 00:34:02,080 Speaker 1: you realize that there is a personal person's on planet 507 00:34:02,120 --> 00:34:05,920 Speaker 1: you and we're not blaming them, but we realize that 508 00:34:05,960 --> 00:34:11,480 Speaker 1: perhaps they are a contributor, then either if possible, if 509 00:34:11,480 --> 00:34:15,680 Speaker 1: possible and appropriate, we extricate ourselves from that relationship or 510 00:34:15,719 --> 00:34:21,719 Speaker 1: that environment, or we perhaps change the dynamic, that is, 511 00:34:21,800 --> 00:34:24,520 Speaker 1: we maybe see them less, we maybe realize there are 512 00:34:24,520 --> 00:34:27,920 Speaker 1: certain conversations we don't have with them. There are people 513 00:34:27,960 --> 00:34:33,880 Speaker 1: in my life virtue of situation and circumstance who are 514 00:34:34,160 --> 00:34:39,600 Speaker 1: over my journey, have not been encouraging or supportive and 515 00:34:39,640 --> 00:34:44,320 Speaker 1: that's okay. Have not had faith in me or confidence 516 00:34:44,360 --> 00:34:51,399 Speaker 1: in me, and have at times undermined, questioned, and done 517 00:34:51,400 --> 00:34:54,399 Speaker 1: a whole lot of things that really did not help 518 00:34:54,440 --> 00:34:58,080 Speaker 1: me to move forward to grow to a vole. In fact, 519 00:34:58,120 --> 00:35:00,759 Speaker 1: if I had have paid too much tension, and I 520 00:35:00,760 --> 00:35:02,520 Speaker 1: did pay too much attention, but if I hadn't have 521 00:35:02,560 --> 00:35:06,960 Speaker 1: been able to extricate myself from that influence, I would 522 00:35:07,000 --> 00:35:08,879 Speaker 1: not have done a lot of the things I've done. 523 00:35:08,920 --> 00:35:12,120 Speaker 1: And I'm definitely no high watermark for success or post 524 00:35:12,160 --> 00:35:14,360 Speaker 1: a board for success. But I've done some really cool 525 00:35:14,360 --> 00:35:17,200 Speaker 1: things and I'm very happy and proud of that. But 526 00:35:18,120 --> 00:35:22,799 Speaker 1: I realize that there are certain people that although I 527 00:35:22,880 --> 00:35:25,919 Speaker 1: may have to have a relationship with them courtesy of 528 00:35:26,760 --> 00:35:31,160 Speaker 1: just my life or situation, there are certain people that 529 00:35:31,200 --> 00:35:35,280 Speaker 1: I won't have particular conversations with, I won't open certain doors. 530 00:35:35,280 --> 00:35:37,840 Speaker 1: And that doesn't mean I hate those people are dislike them. 531 00:35:37,880 --> 00:35:41,920 Speaker 1: It doesn't mean that at all. It just means it 532 00:35:42,080 --> 00:35:45,720 Speaker 1: just means that there are there will always be people 533 00:35:45,719 --> 00:35:50,960 Speaker 1: who don't understand you, or your potential, or your possibilities 534 00:35:51,160 --> 00:35:57,160 Speaker 1: or your vision. And that's okay. We're not about hating 535 00:35:57,160 --> 00:36:00,560 Speaker 1: on people. We're just about realizing, okay, I need to 536 00:36:00,640 --> 00:36:02,600 Speaker 1: And by the way, we're not just looking for people 537 00:36:02,600 --> 00:36:04,680 Speaker 1: who tell us what we want to hear. That's the 538 00:36:04,719 --> 00:36:08,840 Speaker 1: opposite of what we need. But we're talking about people 539 00:36:08,920 --> 00:36:13,480 Speaker 1: who people who genuinely love us and care about us 540 00:36:13,560 --> 00:36:18,560 Speaker 1: and will support us, but also give us intelligent, critical feedback, 541 00:36:19,080 --> 00:36:22,200 Speaker 1: you know, when required. So we don't need the haters, 542 00:36:22,280 --> 00:36:25,120 Speaker 1: and we don't need the over the top, gushy, backslapping, 543 00:36:25,760 --> 00:36:28,640 Speaker 1: you know, support group. We don't need that because that 544 00:36:28,640 --> 00:36:32,719 Speaker 1: can create problems of itself. But just realize that who 545 00:36:32,760 --> 00:36:36,399 Speaker 1: you hang around with matters. In other words, hang out 546 00:36:36,400 --> 00:36:39,040 Speaker 1: with people who drag you up. So that I kind 547 00:36:39,080 --> 00:36:41,279 Speaker 1: of meshed seven and eight there. So number nine is 548 00:36:41,280 --> 00:36:44,799 Speaker 1: this do new things a game? What are we talking about? 549 00:36:44,800 --> 00:36:49,240 Speaker 1: We're talking about getting unstuck. Do new things step into 550 00:36:49,440 --> 00:36:53,800 Speaker 1: unfamiliar territory. I know that when I do new things 551 00:36:53,840 --> 00:36:57,840 Speaker 1: with new people in new environments, I expose myself to 552 00:36:57,920 --> 00:37:02,279 Speaker 1: new ideas. I expose myself to even different cultures and 553 00:37:02,360 --> 00:37:08,840 Speaker 1: conversations and people. When I do something unme all of 554 00:37:08,840 --> 00:37:12,040 Speaker 1: a sudden, I'm doing something new in a way that 555 00:37:12,040 --> 00:37:16,200 Speaker 1: I've never done it, perhaps different place, different experiences, and 556 00:37:16,280 --> 00:37:20,160 Speaker 1: it opens my brain. It makes me realize that I've 557 00:37:20,160 --> 00:37:23,160 Speaker 1: been living in a corridor or an echo chamber. At times, 558 00:37:24,960 --> 00:37:28,520 Speaker 1: when we have new experiences, it exposes us to things 559 00:37:28,560 --> 00:37:31,319 Speaker 1: that we are generally not exposed to in our day 560 00:37:31,360 --> 00:37:37,480 Speaker 1: to day. Sometimes it builds or arouses curiosity. Sometimes it 561 00:37:37,560 --> 00:37:41,480 Speaker 1: creates awareness or insights. Sometimes it gives us a different understanding. 562 00:37:42,040 --> 00:37:46,000 Speaker 1: Sometimes it creates momentum. You know, for example, the amount 563 00:37:46,040 --> 00:37:48,400 Speaker 1: of people that I have worked with over the years 564 00:37:48,440 --> 00:37:51,960 Speaker 1: that have done something physical which was a challenge for 565 00:37:52,040 --> 00:37:55,920 Speaker 1: the first time, and I coached them towards that. They 566 00:37:55,920 --> 00:37:58,160 Speaker 1: did the work, they did the event, they got the outcome, 567 00:37:58,200 --> 00:38:00,719 Speaker 1: not me, but I supported and coached them towards that. 568 00:38:00,840 --> 00:38:04,000 Speaker 1: So somebody who'd never run in their life, never run 569 00:38:04,040 --> 00:38:09,280 Speaker 1: one kilometer, always considered themselves unfit, unhealthy, a complete non athlete. 570 00:38:10,880 --> 00:38:14,640 Speaker 1: People have trained up to eventually do marathons, but even 571 00:38:14,719 --> 00:38:16,680 Speaker 1: say a ten k or a five k fun run, 572 00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:21,879 Speaker 1: when something amazing happens, when people do shit that they 573 00:38:22,120 --> 00:38:27,359 Speaker 1: never thought they could do and they get unstuck, they 574 00:38:27,400 --> 00:38:31,520 Speaker 1: get unstuck, they get out of the groundhog danus of 575 00:38:32,560 --> 00:38:37,600 Speaker 1: overthinking to an extent anyway, But what it does is 576 00:38:37,640 --> 00:38:41,839 Speaker 1: it opens It opens new doors. It opens possibilities and 577 00:38:42,040 --> 00:38:46,680 Speaker 1: understanding of possibilities and understanding of potential. Because when people 578 00:38:46,719 --> 00:38:49,640 Speaker 1: do something that they never thought they could do, instantly 579 00:38:49,680 --> 00:38:52,080 Speaker 1: they have a new belief. Or the belief is I 580 00:38:52,120 --> 00:38:54,120 Speaker 1: can run a marathon. I know because I just ran 581 00:38:54,160 --> 00:38:57,479 Speaker 1: one or a half marathon. The belief is like, oh wow, 582 00:38:57,600 --> 00:39:00,920 Speaker 1: I actually have more capacity and more potential then I 583 00:39:01,040 --> 00:39:04,200 Speaker 1: believed I got it wrong? What else did I get wrong? 584 00:39:05,440 --> 00:39:07,640 Speaker 1: If I can do this, what else can I do? 585 00:39:08,680 --> 00:39:10,400 Speaker 1: If I can get out of my own way and 586 00:39:10,480 --> 00:39:13,520 Speaker 1: run a marathon, or register a business or build a business, 587 00:39:13,600 --> 00:39:17,360 Speaker 1: or do a degree, or lose thirty kilos or menda 588 00:39:17,680 --> 00:39:21,719 Speaker 1: relationship or overcome a distractive habit. If I can do that, 589 00:39:21,960 --> 00:39:24,200 Speaker 1: what else can I do? And it's in the doing 590 00:39:24,400 --> 00:39:30,799 Speaker 1: of especially new things that we've never tried, that we 591 00:39:30,960 --> 00:39:34,480 Speaker 1: change and that we open new doors and we create momentum. 592 00:39:35,960 --> 00:39:40,520 Speaker 1: You know, it seems I'm kind of weird perhaps that 593 00:39:40,600 --> 00:39:44,920 Speaker 1: I say I'm not particularly academic, But I'm not particularly academic, 594 00:39:45,000 --> 00:39:47,880 Speaker 1: That's just the truth. But I'm in the middle of 595 00:39:47,920 --> 00:39:53,279 Speaker 1: this academic journey right now, and apart from the you know, 596 00:39:53,320 --> 00:39:56,880 Speaker 1: the work, and hopefully we'll see hopefully the outcome of 597 00:39:56,880 --> 00:39:59,800 Speaker 1: a PhD and all of that stuff, which is, you know, interesting, 598 00:40:00,680 --> 00:40:02,560 Speaker 1: I guess the good achievement and all that, But you 599 00:40:02,600 --> 00:40:05,880 Speaker 1: know what's really interesting for me is I just know 600 00:40:06,080 --> 00:40:09,560 Speaker 1: so much different stuff now. I just have a different insight. 601 00:40:11,160 --> 00:40:13,440 Speaker 1: And I'm not a better person than I was, but 602 00:40:13,719 --> 00:40:16,760 Speaker 1: I've had in the last four years of my PhD 603 00:40:16,880 --> 00:40:22,759 Speaker 1: journey so many new experiences, new conversations, new insights in 604 00:40:22,880 --> 00:40:28,400 Speaker 1: new environments, being exposed to new ideas, and just so 605 00:40:28,640 --> 00:40:31,640 Speaker 1: much stuff that is so different from the rest of 606 00:40:31,680 --> 00:40:36,120 Speaker 1: my life that it's fucking mind blowing. And it just 607 00:40:36,520 --> 00:40:40,400 Speaker 1: and honestly like, what are we now do I'm sixty 608 00:40:40,480 --> 00:40:45,239 Speaker 1: next month, which is fucking ridiculous, But I've never been 609 00:40:46,600 --> 00:40:49,840 Speaker 1: maybe I've been this excited, but I've never been more excited. 610 00:40:49,880 --> 00:40:56,960 Speaker 1: I don't think I've never been more curious, like to do, 611 00:40:57,160 --> 00:41:01,960 Speaker 1: to keep learning, to keep evolving, to keep optimizing everything 612 00:41:02,080 --> 00:41:04,440 Speaker 1: from my body to my brain, to my knowledge, to 613 00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:08,920 Speaker 1: my performance, to my emotional state, to my outcomes, to 614 00:41:08,960 --> 00:41:11,719 Speaker 1: my relationships, to my business and brand and all of 615 00:41:11,760 --> 00:41:20,160 Speaker 1: those things. I'm so fucking excited because my life is well. Fortunately, yeah, fortunately, 616 00:41:20,239 --> 00:41:23,840 Speaker 1: I'm very blessed and very lucky. I acknowledge that. But 617 00:41:23,960 --> 00:41:26,600 Speaker 1: at the same time, I've worked like a motherfucker for 618 00:41:26,600 --> 00:41:31,040 Speaker 1: forty years. I've born in a great country with great parents, 619 00:41:31,120 --> 00:41:33,280 Speaker 1: and so I had lots of I had a running start, 620 00:41:33,400 --> 00:41:35,480 Speaker 1: as most of us who were born in Australia did 621 00:41:35,520 --> 00:41:41,280 Speaker 1: not all. But it's for me a lifetime of doing 622 00:41:41,320 --> 00:41:45,719 Speaker 1: new things and to stepping into unfamiliar territory, to exposing 623 00:41:45,760 --> 00:41:51,239 Speaker 1: myself to new things, hard things, difficult, unfamiliar things. For me, 624 00:41:51,440 --> 00:41:59,000 Speaker 1: that's what's kept me unstuck, opening businesses, building, helping build 625 00:41:59,040 --> 00:42:04,000 Speaker 1: an industry, person training, writing the first course, writing books, 626 00:42:04,040 --> 00:42:07,680 Speaker 1: getting books published and distributed, working on the radio, working 627 00:42:07,719 --> 00:42:11,120 Speaker 1: in television, going back to or start doing my first 628 00:42:11,120 --> 00:42:13,520 Speaker 1: degree at thirty six years of age, going back at 629 00:42:13,600 --> 00:42:20,480 Speaker 1: fifty six. You know, for another crack, just this capacity 630 00:42:20,560 --> 00:42:24,520 Speaker 1: that we all have to just keep doing new things, 631 00:42:24,600 --> 00:42:28,680 Speaker 1: having new experiences, that we might keep growing and learning 632 00:42:28,680 --> 00:42:33,360 Speaker 1: and evolving. Number ten is a bit deep and philosophical, 633 00:42:33,400 --> 00:42:35,600 Speaker 1: but that's me tap into you. Number ten is tap 634 00:42:35,600 --> 00:42:40,759 Speaker 1: into your internal sat Nab. And if you know me, 635 00:42:40,840 --> 00:42:43,719 Speaker 1: you've heard this term many times. Your internal sat Nab 636 00:42:43,800 --> 00:42:47,160 Speaker 1: is that kind of knowing, that wisdom that insight, that 637 00:42:49,400 --> 00:42:54,880 Speaker 1: intelligence that comes from I don't know where. Maybe it's instinct, 638 00:42:55,000 --> 00:42:57,680 Speaker 1: maybe it's intuition, maybe it's divine. I don't know what 639 00:42:57,800 --> 00:42:59,759 Speaker 1: it is. I really do not know what it is. 640 00:42:59,800 --> 00:43:03,160 Speaker 1: But I do know that I have that you have. 641 00:43:03,320 --> 00:43:08,600 Speaker 1: That we all have a knowledge, a knowing, and an 642 00:43:08,680 --> 00:43:14,200 Speaker 1: understanding and a level of wisdom and insight that is innate. 643 00:43:15,840 --> 00:43:18,239 Speaker 1: I'm not talking about things that we got taught or 644 00:43:18,320 --> 00:43:21,000 Speaker 1: things that we got told, or I'm not talking about 645 00:43:21,080 --> 00:43:25,440 Speaker 1: acquired knowledge. I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about 646 00:43:26,560 --> 00:43:29,240 Speaker 1: in the middle of the bullshit, there's always this still 647 00:43:29,680 --> 00:43:34,719 Speaker 1: quiet voice. There's always this deep seated knowing of what 648 00:43:34,760 --> 00:43:38,279 Speaker 1: we should do and shouldn't do. And sometimes we just 649 00:43:38,400 --> 00:43:40,960 Speaker 1: drowned that out with noise and with chaos and with 650 00:43:41,040 --> 00:43:45,280 Speaker 1: busyness and booze and drugs and lack of focus and attention. 651 00:43:45,400 --> 00:43:47,440 Speaker 1: But when we can be still, where we can hit 652 00:43:47,480 --> 00:43:50,960 Speaker 1: the pause button, when we can find some space and 653 00:43:51,000 --> 00:43:57,319 Speaker 1: some time and some quiet, then we can realize and 654 00:43:57,400 --> 00:44:01,759 Speaker 1: come to see and understand things that we don't when 655 00:44:01,800 --> 00:44:03,960 Speaker 1: we're in our head, when we're trapped in our head, 656 00:44:04,000 --> 00:44:06,520 Speaker 1: when we're trapped in the momentum and the chaos of life. 657 00:44:08,480 --> 00:44:12,640 Speaker 1: And this requires again discipline, This requires some time. This 658 00:44:12,800 --> 00:44:14,640 Speaker 1: is not something that you can do in the middle 659 00:44:14,680 --> 00:44:18,279 Speaker 1: of the bullshit. This is something that rere Maybe it 660 00:44:18,320 --> 00:44:20,640 Speaker 1: means that five minutes, you know, you have fourteen hundred 661 00:44:20,640 --> 00:44:23,680 Speaker 1: and forty minutes a day. Maybe it means five minutes 662 00:44:24,160 --> 00:44:28,719 Speaker 1: you sit somewhere and you try to switch off and 663 00:44:28,760 --> 00:44:30,960 Speaker 1: you just see what comes up for you. You just feel 664 00:44:30,960 --> 00:44:33,040 Speaker 1: what you feel, and maybe you get out of your 665 00:44:33,080 --> 00:44:35,600 Speaker 1: head and maybe you get into your heart, maybe you 666 00:44:35,680 --> 00:44:38,960 Speaker 1: see what's going on in there. Number eleven, we've got 667 00:44:38,960 --> 00:44:41,520 Speaker 1: three more to go. Number eleven is keep trying. And 668 00:44:41,560 --> 00:44:43,400 Speaker 1: that's one of those things you think, well, you wouldn't 669 00:44:43,400 --> 00:44:45,319 Speaker 1: have to say that, But the truth is people don't 670 00:44:45,400 --> 00:44:48,680 Speaker 1: keep trying. The truth is people try and then they stop. 671 00:44:49,960 --> 00:44:52,000 Speaker 1: But if they kept trying and they kept trying and 672 00:44:52,040 --> 00:44:56,239 Speaker 1: they improvised and adapted, you know, and overcame and survived 673 00:44:56,320 --> 00:44:59,279 Speaker 1: and just figured it out and fell down and got 674 00:44:59,400 --> 00:45:01,920 Speaker 1: up and fell down and got up and you know, 675 00:45:02,040 --> 00:45:05,640 Speaker 1: fucked up and got back up, and you know, sometimes 676 00:45:05,640 --> 00:45:09,560 Speaker 1: it just comes down to not giving up. That's not sexy, 677 00:45:09,600 --> 00:45:12,040 Speaker 1: that doesn't require three HDS. You didn't need to pay 678 00:45:12,080 --> 00:45:15,120 Speaker 1: for that. But some people just don't give up, and 679 00:45:15,160 --> 00:45:18,480 Speaker 1: they're not, you know, and they outperformed people with more 680 00:45:18,520 --> 00:45:21,239 Speaker 1: talent and skill and a higher IQ and better genetics. 681 00:45:22,280 --> 00:45:25,400 Speaker 1: And I think part of the reason I've done okay 682 00:45:26,640 --> 00:45:30,080 Speaker 1: is that, like and for me, I've said this before, 683 00:45:30,200 --> 00:45:34,560 Speaker 1: because I wasn't the naturally gifted, talented, genetically blessed kid, 684 00:45:35,719 --> 00:45:37,920 Speaker 1: I always had to work harder for everything. I had 685 00:45:37,920 --> 00:45:39,920 Speaker 1: to work harder to get in shape, and harder to 686 00:45:39,960 --> 00:45:43,239 Speaker 1: make sporting teams, and harder to get academic results, and 687 00:45:43,320 --> 00:45:47,120 Speaker 1: harder to even fit in socially because I wasn't the 688 00:45:47,200 --> 00:45:51,239 Speaker 1: naturally charming, charismatic, gifted kid. I wasn't that, And so 689 00:45:51,440 --> 00:45:57,280 Speaker 1: my my mediocrity in some ways for me was a gift, 690 00:45:57,480 --> 00:46:00,640 Speaker 1: and it was a gift that turned into resilience. It 691 00:46:00,719 --> 00:46:03,960 Speaker 1: was the gift that turned into the capacity that I 692 00:46:04,040 --> 00:46:06,200 Speaker 1: have to keep going to not give up, to be 693 00:46:06,280 --> 00:46:09,759 Speaker 1: able to deal with what many people would call failures. 694 00:46:09,960 --> 00:46:13,680 Speaker 1: I will generally call them insight into you know, what's 695 00:46:13,719 --> 00:46:19,080 Speaker 1: working and what's not. Fall down, Get up, Fall down 696 00:46:19,120 --> 00:46:25,880 Speaker 1: six times, get up seven. Number twelve. This is an 697 00:46:25,920 --> 00:46:28,879 Speaker 1: interesting one. Actually, Now I'm going to do that one 698 00:46:28,960 --> 00:46:31,800 Speaker 1: last number, so we'll call this one number twelve. You 699 00:46:31,840 --> 00:46:33,400 Speaker 1: don't know what I'm talking about, but I just switched 700 00:46:33,400 --> 00:46:35,239 Speaker 1: my own list around. Number twelve is build a new 701 00:46:35,280 --> 00:46:39,880 Speaker 1: relationship with this comfort. I talk about this too much, probably, 702 00:46:40,840 --> 00:46:42,680 Speaker 1: but I'm saying this for those of you who are 703 00:46:42,680 --> 00:46:45,120 Speaker 1: relatively new and haven't heard much of me. I'm going 704 00:46:45,160 --> 00:46:48,120 Speaker 1: to tell you that our capacity to be able to 705 00:46:48,200 --> 00:46:50,440 Speaker 1: deal with discomfort and do things that we don't want 706 00:46:50,480 --> 00:46:52,360 Speaker 1: to do and things that are not fun, quick, easy, 707 00:46:52,440 --> 00:46:56,280 Speaker 1: or painless, that is a superpower. That is a personal 708 00:46:56,320 --> 00:47:02,160 Speaker 1: development superpower. Because when we can, when we can lean 709 00:47:02,200 --> 00:47:07,120 Speaker 1: into the discomfort, when we can when we can embrace 710 00:47:07,200 --> 00:47:10,600 Speaker 1: the hard thing, when we can choose to physically, mentally, 711 00:47:10,640 --> 00:47:14,680 Speaker 1: emotionally work against resistance. Just like we go to the gym, 712 00:47:14,760 --> 00:47:20,200 Speaker 1: we work against resistance. The byproduct is strength. The byproduct 713 00:47:20,280 --> 00:47:23,239 Speaker 1: is we build resilience and capacity and insight. We do 714 00:47:23,280 --> 00:47:27,480 Speaker 1: a hard thing and we develop. And when we are 715 00:47:27,520 --> 00:47:31,160 Speaker 1: prepared to change our relationship with discomfort, that is, we 716 00:47:31,239 --> 00:47:35,279 Speaker 1: are prepared to lean into the pain in an intelligent, strategic, 717 00:47:35,400 --> 00:47:39,080 Speaker 1: not a reckless or silly way, but prepared to embrace 718 00:47:39,280 --> 00:47:44,719 Speaker 1: pain on a daily basis sometimes or embrace discomfort, then 719 00:47:45,160 --> 00:47:48,719 Speaker 1: we accelerate our growth, we accelerate our learning, we accelerate 720 00:47:48,760 --> 00:47:51,640 Speaker 1: our resilience. Every day in my life, I do things 721 00:47:51,640 --> 00:47:54,359 Speaker 1: that I don't want to do, things that are uncomfortable, 722 00:47:54,400 --> 00:47:56,040 Speaker 1: but things that I need to do to live my 723 00:47:56,080 --> 00:47:59,520 Speaker 1: best life. Every day, every day I do things that 724 00:47:59,560 --> 00:48:02,480 Speaker 1: if it was just up to my comfort level or 725 00:48:02,480 --> 00:48:05,080 Speaker 1: what I would like to do, or what is fun 726 00:48:05,280 --> 00:48:08,759 Speaker 1: or what is convenient, there's shit that I would absolutely 727 00:48:08,960 --> 00:48:14,000 Speaker 1: not do. But because of my commitment to being the 728 00:48:14,000 --> 00:48:17,280 Speaker 1: best version of me, I do that stuff on autopilot. 729 00:48:17,560 --> 00:48:20,719 Speaker 1: I don't overthink it because I realize that's the commitment. 730 00:48:20,760 --> 00:48:24,400 Speaker 1: That's the price that I need to invest every day. 731 00:48:25,280 --> 00:48:28,080 Speaker 1: That's the emotional, physical, mental investment that I need to 732 00:48:28,080 --> 00:48:30,520 Speaker 1: make every day to create outcomes I want to create. 733 00:48:31,960 --> 00:48:37,399 Speaker 1: And the last one, Number thirteen is is is deep. 734 00:48:37,800 --> 00:48:41,200 Speaker 1: Number thirteen is don't ask me why thirteen. I've just 735 00:48:41,200 --> 00:48:46,880 Speaker 1: come up with thirteen points. Number thirteen is considing or mortality. 736 00:48:47,440 --> 00:48:50,560 Speaker 1: One of the things I think about is where I 737 00:48:50,600 --> 00:48:54,560 Speaker 1: am now, Not in a morbid way or a dark way, 738 00:48:54,600 --> 00:49:00,840 Speaker 1: but where I am now in the totality of Craig 739 00:49:00,880 --> 00:49:05,040 Speaker 1: Harper's life. I think about nine Aeen sixty three and 740 00:49:05,080 --> 00:49:08,839 Speaker 1: I think about twenty twenty three, So nineteen sixty three 741 00:49:08,880 --> 00:49:12,600 Speaker 1: September I was born September twenty eight, So next month, 742 00:49:12,640 --> 00:49:16,200 Speaker 1: September twenty eight, I'll be sixty. And I go, wow, 743 00:49:17,520 --> 00:49:22,279 Speaker 1: if I'm a typical Australian male, whatever that is, but 744 00:49:22,400 --> 00:49:27,400 Speaker 1: I'm going to live if I'm typical to around eighty. 745 00:49:27,600 --> 00:49:29,560 Speaker 1: Might be eighty one or eighty two, but let's just 746 00:49:29,680 --> 00:49:31,880 Speaker 1: round it out to eighty. So if you go, well, Craig, 747 00:49:31,920 --> 00:49:37,000 Speaker 1: if you're typical, your three quarters done. If I'm typical, 748 00:49:38,280 --> 00:49:39,960 Speaker 1: let's hope I'm not. Let's hope I have a few 749 00:49:39,960 --> 00:49:43,080 Speaker 1: more years than that. But if I'm typical, I have 750 00:49:43,120 --> 00:49:45,200 Speaker 1: about twenty years to live. Now. I know that you 751 00:49:45,280 --> 00:49:49,319 Speaker 1: might go, oh, that's fucking sad or dark or also real. 752 00:49:49,960 --> 00:49:54,840 Speaker 1: Also potentially that's my reality. Potentially, like I said, hopefully 753 00:49:54,880 --> 00:49:59,000 Speaker 1: I can live longer and better, but who knows. And 754 00:49:59,080 --> 00:50:03,600 Speaker 1: so I think sometimes it's good to, albeit somewhat uncomfortable 755 00:50:03,640 --> 00:50:08,320 Speaker 1: and scary, to think about where am I on my journey, 756 00:50:08,360 --> 00:50:12,640 Speaker 1: on my human journey? How much longer on my human 757 00:50:12,719 --> 00:50:17,560 Speaker 1: journey am I going to wait? How much longer am 758 00:50:17,560 --> 00:50:22,400 Speaker 1: I going to feed myself? Bullshit? Either? Cognitively, emotionally or 759 00:50:22,440 --> 00:50:27,160 Speaker 1: literally eating shit crap food. How much longer am I 760 00:50:27,239 --> 00:50:31,400 Speaker 1: going to waste my time, my talent, my potential. Am 761 00:50:31,440 --> 00:50:33,440 Speaker 1: I going to do it till I'm seventy? Am I 762 00:50:33,480 --> 00:50:37,160 Speaker 1: going to do it till I just dropped dead? One day? 763 00:50:37,440 --> 00:50:42,120 Speaker 1: Like what in the context of what really matters to me, 764 00:50:42,280 --> 00:50:46,040 Speaker 1: in the context of the totality of my life? This 765 00:50:46,160 --> 00:50:48,080 Speaker 1: is my only life. I can't get another one. I 766 00:50:48,080 --> 00:50:51,600 Speaker 1: can't get another body. And so for me who looks 767 00:50:51,600 --> 00:50:56,320 Speaker 1: at the you know, just I once drew a dot 768 00:50:56,400 --> 00:50:58,799 Speaker 1: on the left hand side of my white border, dot 769 00:50:58,840 --> 00:51:02,560 Speaker 1: on the right, and then I kind of I've figured 770 00:51:02,560 --> 00:51:04,680 Speaker 1: out my timeline where I was at, and I looked 771 00:51:04,680 --> 00:51:07,280 Speaker 1: at the context of the totality of my life based 772 00:51:07,320 --> 00:51:10,480 Speaker 1: on eighty years, and you know, that line was three 773 00:51:10,560 --> 00:51:15,440 Speaker 1: quarters complete. I'm like wow. And of course there are 774 00:51:15,440 --> 00:51:18,160 Speaker 1: a few variables that hopefully I can influence and control 775 00:51:18,200 --> 00:51:21,640 Speaker 1: about doing the next twenty years or your longer perhaps better. 776 00:51:23,239 --> 00:51:27,440 Speaker 1: But this is great sometimes as uncomfortable as it might be, 777 00:51:27,520 --> 00:51:29,480 Speaker 1: but it is great to step back and go fuck 778 00:51:30,719 --> 00:51:34,359 Speaker 1: my life, my life, what am I doing? Like, where 779 00:51:34,360 --> 00:51:37,279 Speaker 1: am I at? What's going on with my job? And 780 00:51:37,320 --> 00:51:39,600 Speaker 1: me and my relationships and my body and my staff, 781 00:51:39,640 --> 00:51:43,000 Speaker 1: and my happiness and my purpose and my reason and 782 00:51:43,560 --> 00:51:46,799 Speaker 1: my spiritual life, my religion, norm whatever it is that 783 00:51:46,960 --> 00:51:52,200 Speaker 1: matters to you. Like one day, you and I we 784 00:51:52,239 --> 00:51:54,759 Speaker 1: ain't going to be here, yeah, and we need to 785 00:51:54,840 --> 00:51:57,120 Speaker 1: think about well, we don't need to do anything. But 786 00:51:57,640 --> 00:52:00,799 Speaker 1: I'm keen on figuring out, Okay, what am I going 787 00:52:00,840 --> 00:52:01,080 Speaker 1: to do? 788 00:52:01,160 --> 00:52:01,239 Speaker 2: Be? 789 00:52:01,400 --> 00:52:03,200 Speaker 1: Create? Change? What am I going to do in the 790 00:52:03,200 --> 00:52:05,360 Speaker 1: next twenty or thirty years. And it's not all about 791 00:52:05,360 --> 00:52:08,359 Speaker 1: ticking boxes and achieving, And it's not all about that. 792 00:52:08,440 --> 00:52:10,520 Speaker 1: I also want to have fun. I also want to laugh. 793 00:52:10,560 --> 00:52:14,120 Speaker 1: I also want joy. I also want to watch Netflix 794 00:52:14,160 --> 00:52:17,040 Speaker 1: and ride motorbikes and fucking hang out with friends. But 795 00:52:17,080 --> 00:52:19,959 Speaker 1: at the same time, I want to be the best 796 00:52:20,080 --> 00:52:23,839 Speaker 1: version of me. I want to live as long as 797 00:52:23,840 --> 00:52:26,840 Speaker 1: I can optimally. I want to eat great food. I 798 00:52:26,880 --> 00:52:28,239 Speaker 1: want to live in a great body. I want to 799 00:52:28,600 --> 00:52:30,480 Speaker 1: I want to have a great, healthy mind. I want 800 00:52:30,520 --> 00:52:33,040 Speaker 1: a healthy brain. I want healthy relationships. I want to 801 00:52:33,080 --> 00:52:37,399 Speaker 1: do shit that's rewarding, fulfilling and fun. I don't want 802 00:52:37,400 --> 00:52:43,000 Speaker 1: to let father time or mother nature take a hold. 803 00:52:44,360 --> 00:52:46,800 Speaker 1: There are things that I can do to self regulate 804 00:52:46,840 --> 00:52:50,120 Speaker 1: and self manage, which means I can live longer for 805 00:52:50,239 --> 00:52:54,440 Speaker 1: better if I do certain things well. I feel like 806 00:52:54,480 --> 00:52:56,880 Speaker 1: that was worth sharing. I'm not sure if it was 807 00:52:56,920 --> 00:53:00,600 Speaker 1: worth listening to. I enjoyed sharing it with you. I 808 00:53:00,680 --> 00:53:04,879 Speaker 1: love your collective gutses. Are enjoy a day over and out.