1 00:00:00,440 --> 00:00:03,080 Speaker 1: Good eight team. It's harps hope, you're bloody terrific. So 2 00:00:03,120 --> 00:00:05,120 Speaker 1: I want to talk to you about the very common 3 00:00:06,200 --> 00:00:11,639 Speaker 1: habit of getting stuck. That is spinning our wheels, that 4 00:00:11,800 --> 00:00:16,320 Speaker 1: is living life or part of our life in a 5 00:00:16,680 --> 00:00:21,360 Speaker 1: perpetual holding pattern, thinking about doing different while not doing different, 6 00:00:21,440 --> 00:00:25,840 Speaker 1: talking about doing different and better while not doing it, 7 00:00:25,920 --> 00:00:29,720 Speaker 1: talking about transformation and improvement and growth and learning and 8 00:00:29,920 --> 00:00:33,360 Speaker 1: unlearning and becoming the best version of ourselves and exploring 9 00:00:33,360 --> 00:00:37,120 Speaker 1: our talents and our potential and building our best whatever, 10 00:00:37,200 --> 00:00:43,000 Speaker 1: while simultaneously not fucking doing it. Ah, And let's be honest. 11 00:00:43,200 --> 00:00:44,959 Speaker 1: Let's be honest. That's a lot of people a lot 12 00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:47,800 Speaker 1: of the time. And that's not me being critical. That's 13 00:00:47,840 --> 00:00:52,080 Speaker 1: me being an observer of people. Also myself being one 14 00:00:52,080 --> 00:00:54,920 Speaker 1: of those people. So there've been many times in my 15 00:00:55,120 --> 00:01:01,080 Speaker 1: life when I have been I've been, I guess, trapped 16 00:01:01,080 --> 00:01:05,319 Speaker 1: in a kind of a holding pattern, a holding pattern 17 00:01:05,360 --> 00:01:10,120 Speaker 1: of mediocrity, like a groundhog day, like same shits, same stuff, 18 00:01:10,280 --> 00:01:13,840 Speaker 1: same doing the same things with my business or my brand, 19 00:01:14,040 --> 00:01:17,800 Speaker 1: or my money, or my body, or my relationships or 20 00:01:17,840 --> 00:01:22,760 Speaker 1: my spiritual life or my mental health or my emotional 21 00:01:22,800 --> 00:01:29,280 Speaker 1: health or my academic pursuits, my learning, commitment, my training, 22 00:01:29,800 --> 00:01:34,000 Speaker 1: my nutrition, doing stuff that didn't work, but nonetheless getting 23 00:01:34,080 --> 00:01:37,120 Speaker 1: up each day and essentially doing a version of what 24 00:01:37,280 --> 00:01:43,959 Speaker 1: didn't work the last day, month, year, decade sometimes. So 25 00:01:44,400 --> 00:01:47,680 Speaker 1: I'm very interested in, as you are well know, I'm 26 00:01:47,680 --> 00:01:52,400 Speaker 1: interested in human potential. I'm interested in possibilities. I'm interested 27 00:01:52,440 --> 00:01:57,120 Speaker 1: in what we can do, what I can do, what 28 00:01:57,160 --> 00:01:59,160 Speaker 1: you can do when you and me get out of 29 00:01:59,200 --> 00:02:05,720 Speaker 1: our own way, when I can get out of my 30 00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:15,640 Speaker 1: destructive habits, my self destructive self talk, thinking, my shitty lifestyle, 31 00:02:16,160 --> 00:02:19,760 Speaker 1: not so much these days, but at times, my relationships, 32 00:02:19,800 --> 00:02:25,320 Speaker 1: my operating system, not just relationships with people, but relationships 33 00:02:25,360 --> 00:02:31,440 Speaker 1: with food, relationships with my body, relationships with all of 34 00:02:31,480 --> 00:02:36,359 Speaker 1: the things that I do, habits and behaviors, and stepping 35 00:02:36,400 --> 00:02:40,959 Speaker 1: into out of the self destruction and the overthinking and 36 00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:44,400 Speaker 1: the self doubt and the imposter syndrome, and slowly stepping 37 00:02:44,440 --> 00:02:50,000 Speaker 1: into self awareness and self genuine self improvement and self 38 00:02:50,040 --> 00:02:55,040 Speaker 1: regulation and self optimization for that matter. So many years, 39 00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:57,200 Speaker 1: for many years, I worked with people who came to 40 00:02:57,240 --> 00:03:01,320 Speaker 1: me to get in shape physically, and then more recently 41 00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:05,760 Speaker 1: last decade or so, you know, mentally and emotionally, but 42 00:03:05,919 --> 00:03:10,720 Speaker 1: who were stuck and stuck physically sometimes or stuck mentally 43 00:03:10,880 --> 00:03:16,200 Speaker 1: or emotionally all three, or socially and or socially practically 44 00:03:16,320 --> 00:03:23,720 Speaker 1: behaviorally you know, just in this normal operating system that 45 00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:30,160 Speaker 1: doesn't work. So there's there's a there's a degree of 46 00:03:30,400 --> 00:03:35,440 Speaker 1: unconsciousness that all of us in habit, and as the 47 00:03:35,520 --> 00:03:39,120 Speaker 1: name suggests, we're not aware of it. That is, we 48 00:03:39,280 --> 00:03:41,880 Speaker 1: unconsciously do a lot of things, and we do a 49 00:03:41,920 --> 00:03:45,360 Speaker 1: lot of things that really will require very very low 50 00:03:45,480 --> 00:03:49,280 Speaker 1: level decision making in that you know, we've got to 51 00:03:49,280 --> 00:03:50,880 Speaker 1: open the fridge to get the thing out to put 52 00:03:50,920 --> 00:03:53,160 Speaker 1: it in our mouth, but it's almost like we do 53 00:03:53,200 --> 00:03:56,760 Speaker 1: that without thinking, without choosing. It's just a habit, it's 54 00:03:56,800 --> 00:03:59,840 Speaker 1: a pattern, that's a ritual, it's a behavior. I feel 55 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,520 Speaker 1: I'm not hungry, I'm not actually hungry, I don't actually 56 00:04:02,600 --> 00:04:04,920 Speaker 1: need food, but I'm having a bad day. So now 57 00:04:04,920 --> 00:04:08,640 Speaker 1: I'm grabbing chocolate. Now I'm eating chocolate, I feel a 58 00:04:08,640 --> 00:04:11,400 Speaker 1: bit flat, I feel a bit anxious. Now I'm grabbing booze. 59 00:04:11,400 --> 00:04:14,880 Speaker 1: I fit whatever. And so we have a propensity and 60 00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:18,080 Speaker 1: a tendency, many of us, to do things for an 61 00:04:18,120 --> 00:04:24,359 Speaker 1: extended period of time, sometimes decades that clearly do not 62 00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:26,839 Speaker 1: work for us. And when I say do not work, 63 00:04:27,760 --> 00:04:30,240 Speaker 1: I'm saying do not work on the understanding or the 64 00:04:30,240 --> 00:04:33,360 Speaker 1: premise that we want to be better. We don't want 65 00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:35,720 Speaker 1: to be unhealthy. We don't want destructive habits. We don't 66 00:04:35,720 --> 00:04:38,080 Speaker 1: want to overthink. We don't want to overdrink. We don't 67 00:04:38,080 --> 00:04:43,000 Speaker 1: want to overeat. We don't want to be the procrastinator. 68 00:04:43,040 --> 00:04:45,039 Speaker 1: We don't want to be the excuse maker. We don't 69 00:04:45,040 --> 00:04:47,280 Speaker 1: want to be the avoid or the denier. We want 70 00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:50,120 Speaker 1: to take ownership, we want to take charge. We want 71 00:04:50,160 --> 00:04:54,919 Speaker 1: to optimize our genetics, optimize our potential, optimize our IQ, 72 00:04:55,160 --> 00:05:01,159 Speaker 1: our intellectual capacity, optimize our creativity. We talk all the time, 73 00:05:01,279 --> 00:05:05,200 Speaker 1: especially in the personal development, self help space, human performance, 74 00:05:05,279 --> 00:05:11,320 Speaker 1: human behavior, we talk all the time about optimization, that is, 75 00:05:11,640 --> 00:05:17,560 Speaker 1: getting the most out of ourselves. But truly, truly, as 76 00:05:17,640 --> 00:05:20,440 Speaker 1: unpopular as this might be, or as uncomfortable as this 77 00:05:20,560 --> 00:05:23,000 Speaker 1: might be for some to hear, and I don't know you, 78 00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:26,080 Speaker 1: so clearly it's not personal, or clearly you're one of 79 00:05:26,160 --> 00:05:29,440 Speaker 1: many listenings, so I'm not targeting you. So all I 80 00:05:29,520 --> 00:05:31,920 Speaker 1: ask you to do is consider what I'm about to say, 81 00:05:31,960 --> 00:05:33,840 Speaker 1: and that what I'm about to say is that some 82 00:05:33,960 --> 00:05:37,760 Speaker 1: of you have probably been doing things that don't work 83 00:05:37,800 --> 00:05:40,200 Speaker 1: for a very long time, and maybe lots of things 84 00:05:40,200 --> 00:05:45,640 Speaker 1: that don't work. And if on some level you've kind 85 00:05:45,680 --> 00:05:48,279 Speaker 1: of resigned yourself to that fact and you're kind of 86 00:05:48,320 --> 00:05:53,359 Speaker 1: okay with it, then okay. However, if you're not okay 87 00:05:53,360 --> 00:05:56,120 Speaker 1: with it, if you are sick of being the one 88 00:05:56,200 --> 00:05:59,599 Speaker 1: day soon person, the almost person. I listened to so 89 00:05:59,680 --> 00:06:02,960 Speaker 1: much self help and personal development, behavioral change, in neuroscience 90 00:06:02,960 --> 00:06:06,400 Speaker 1: and neuropsychology and nutrition, and I've read every fucking thing 91 00:06:06,440 --> 00:06:08,360 Speaker 1: and listen to every fucking thing. But here I am, 92 00:06:08,400 --> 00:06:11,120 Speaker 1: and I'm still in groundhog day. I'm still spinning my wheels, 93 00:06:11,839 --> 00:06:14,920 Speaker 1: I'm still going nowhere fast. I'm still in a perpetual 94 00:06:15,040 --> 00:06:20,080 Speaker 1: holding pattern of mediocrity and dissatisfaction and wasted time, talent, 95 00:06:20,200 --> 00:06:26,599 Speaker 1: and energy. If that's you, then then one, do you 96 00:06:26,640 --> 00:06:31,279 Speaker 1: need to figure out if you're really desperately, passionately committed 97 00:06:31,360 --> 00:06:36,000 Speaker 1: to changing that? And then two, whether or not you 98 00:06:36,080 --> 00:06:40,880 Speaker 1: are genuinely willing to pay the price of whatever is 99 00:06:40,920 --> 00:06:44,960 Speaker 1: required to create that shift on planet you. And this 100 00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:47,440 Speaker 1: is the big kind of gap, This is the chasm 101 00:06:48,080 --> 00:06:51,159 Speaker 1: between the idea and the action and the idea. Everyone's 102 00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:54,159 Speaker 1: in love with the idea. Everyone's in love with the 103 00:06:54,200 --> 00:06:57,680 Speaker 1: idea of better. Everyone's in love with the idea of 104 00:06:57,800 --> 00:07:04,560 Speaker 1: lean and strong and functional and successful and joyful and 105 00:07:04,640 --> 00:07:11,400 Speaker 1: wealthy and focused and fulfilled. We love all that shit 106 00:07:11,560 --> 00:07:15,800 Speaker 1: because who doesn't want that. We all want that or 107 00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:20,280 Speaker 1: a version of that. I rarely speak to people who 108 00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:24,320 Speaker 1: say I am totally content. I don't want anything else. 109 00:07:25,160 --> 00:07:27,440 Speaker 1: This is a whole other conversation, by the way, but 110 00:07:27,520 --> 00:07:30,440 Speaker 1: I'm there, I don't need any more. I'm happy. I'm content, 111 00:07:31,320 --> 00:07:35,040 Speaker 1: you know, for the most part, not anxious. Life's great. 112 00:07:36,720 --> 00:07:41,120 Speaker 1: That's generally not the case. And there's another conversation, as 113 00:07:41,120 --> 00:07:43,560 Speaker 1: I said to you, had around that. But for the moment, 114 00:07:43,960 --> 00:07:47,240 Speaker 1: I want to talk to you about whether or not 115 00:07:47,520 --> 00:07:50,600 Speaker 1: you are genuinely ready. Firstly, I'm going to operate on 116 00:07:50,640 --> 00:07:54,880 Speaker 1: the assumption that you are at the very least interested 117 00:07:55,160 --> 00:07:59,880 Speaker 1: in getting unstuck, interested in getting out of your own way, 118 00:08:00,120 --> 00:08:03,880 Speaker 1: interested in stepping out of the rules and habits and 119 00:08:04,080 --> 00:08:08,560 Speaker 1: rituals and the perpetual holding pattern that you may be 120 00:08:08,680 --> 00:08:11,240 Speaker 1: in in some areas of your life that doesn't work 121 00:08:12,440 --> 00:08:17,440 Speaker 1: or don't work. To step out of that. So firstly, 122 00:08:17,520 --> 00:08:20,800 Speaker 1: let's talk about what are the drivers? What are the 123 00:08:20,840 --> 00:08:24,440 Speaker 1: things which cause us to get stuck? And so this 124 00:08:24,520 --> 00:08:28,200 Speaker 1: list is not in terms of significance or important. They 125 00:08:28,200 --> 00:08:34,280 Speaker 1: are all equally important. And some of these may relate 126 00:08:34,360 --> 00:08:37,760 Speaker 1: to you, some of them may not. It's seven or 127 00:08:37,800 --> 00:08:41,920 Speaker 1: eight or nine maybe, And some of them seem like 128 00:08:42,240 --> 00:08:45,680 Speaker 1: overly simple. Well, come on, Craig, I need more than that. 129 00:08:45,720 --> 00:08:49,640 Speaker 1: I need some deeper science. I need something more profound 130 00:08:49,720 --> 00:08:53,440 Speaker 1: than that. I need something more wise and insightful and 131 00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:59,480 Speaker 1: deep than laziness. For example, this sounds funny, but I 132 00:08:59,640 --> 00:09:02,240 Speaker 1: just meet people who are fucking lazy, and that's why 133 00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:07,560 Speaker 1: they're stuck. It's not even that they're scared, they're just lazy. 134 00:09:08,160 --> 00:09:11,760 Speaker 1: They just don't They just don't want to do the work. 135 00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:14,200 Speaker 1: They like the idea of the outcome, they like the 136 00:09:14,240 --> 00:09:17,480 Speaker 1: idea of the destination, but they are not ready to 137 00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:21,040 Speaker 1: get up every day and walk the path, or drive 138 00:09:21,080 --> 00:09:25,600 Speaker 1: the path, or take the path, or or take the journey. 139 00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:28,920 Speaker 1: Like the destination, the idea of the outcome is brilliant, 140 00:09:28,920 --> 00:09:33,600 Speaker 1: but the idea of doing what's required to create that outcome, 141 00:09:33,640 --> 00:09:40,240 Speaker 1: they're like, ah soon, And so you know, if laziness 142 00:09:40,320 --> 00:09:46,400 Speaker 1: is the overriding kind of factor, then we're stuck. And 143 00:09:46,480 --> 00:09:49,800 Speaker 1: so that and I think sometimes that that kind of 144 00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:55,480 Speaker 1: general apathy, laziness, apathy, lack of motivation, perhaps they're tied 145 00:09:55,520 --> 00:10:01,640 Speaker 1: in together. And my just my thoughts. This is not science, 146 00:10:01,720 --> 00:10:06,400 Speaker 1: this is my thoughts. I think that, as I've said 147 00:10:06,440 --> 00:10:10,960 Speaker 1: a lot on this show, there's almost like a psychological 148 00:10:11,040 --> 00:10:13,720 Speaker 1: and or emotional tipping point for a lot of us, 149 00:10:14,520 --> 00:10:16,720 Speaker 1: and that is we kind of just go. We just 150 00:10:16,880 --> 00:10:21,000 Speaker 1: kind of trudge along in blah, you know, in Blasville, 151 00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:24,760 Speaker 1: in mediocrity in three out of ten, and it's not 152 00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:27,760 Speaker 1: fulfilling or rewarding or awesome or joyful, but it's also 153 00:10:27,880 --> 00:10:32,000 Speaker 1: not complete shit. It's okay. There are moments of okayness, 154 00:10:32,040 --> 00:10:36,480 Speaker 1: and you know, until we get to that point where 155 00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:40,160 Speaker 1: we associate more pain with staying in it than getting 156 00:10:40,160 --> 00:10:43,000 Speaker 1: out of it, most of us will stay in it. 157 00:10:44,440 --> 00:10:49,640 Speaker 1: And you can see as an observer of human behavior, 158 00:10:49,679 --> 00:10:56,920 Speaker 1: you can see people staying in things, sometimes relationships or 159 00:10:57,000 --> 00:11:01,160 Speaker 1: jobs or situations or circumstances or environments or patterns or habits, 160 00:11:01,240 --> 00:11:04,840 Speaker 1: staying in things that really don't work, but on some 161 00:11:05,040 --> 00:11:08,360 Speaker 1: level they're scared of the option. They're scared of the work, 162 00:11:08,400 --> 00:11:11,439 Speaker 1: They're scared of the unknown, They're scared of the uncertainty. 163 00:11:12,040 --> 00:11:15,040 Speaker 1: Should they shut the door on that thing and step 164 00:11:15,080 --> 00:11:19,079 Speaker 1: away and head in a new direction with no safety 165 00:11:19,080 --> 00:11:27,120 Speaker 1: in it? So fear comes into it, laziness, apathy, fear. Mindset. Now, 166 00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:30,000 Speaker 1: when I talk about mindset, clearly we could and we 167 00:11:30,120 --> 00:11:33,760 Speaker 1: have done many shows on this, But it's, you know, 168 00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:37,880 Speaker 1: being aware that my mind is not in charge of me. 169 00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:40,640 Speaker 1: I am in charge of my mind. And yes I'm 170 00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:44,400 Speaker 1: not talking about my brain here. My brain is different, 171 00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:47,760 Speaker 1: is a different animal. But in terms of managing regulating 172 00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:50,880 Speaker 1: my thoughts, what I pay attention to, what I focus on? 173 00:11:51,320 --> 00:11:54,440 Speaker 1: Am I the problem person? Am I the solution person? 174 00:11:55,040 --> 00:11:58,440 Speaker 1: Am I making good decisions? How do I process the 175 00:11:58,480 --> 00:12:02,320 Speaker 1: world around me? What is the thing that happened? What 176 00:12:02,480 --> 00:12:05,320 Speaker 1: is my story that I'm telling myself about the thing 177 00:12:05,679 --> 00:12:09,160 Speaker 1: that happened? Why do I think the way that I think? 178 00:12:09,240 --> 00:12:13,480 Speaker 1: Where does my thinking come from? What role does my 179 00:12:13,720 --> 00:12:20,080 Speaker 1: programming play in my current internal paradigm, in my internal framework? 180 00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:23,880 Speaker 1: What role does my programming play in terms of how 181 00:12:23,920 --> 00:12:26,080 Speaker 1: I live and what I do and my values and 182 00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:31,720 Speaker 1: so on? So, becoming aware of these internal kind of 183 00:12:31,880 --> 00:12:37,200 Speaker 1: drivers that influence, perhaps determine whether or not we stay 184 00:12:37,240 --> 00:12:43,800 Speaker 1: stuck or we move self doubt. Self doubt is like 185 00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:50,120 Speaker 1: almost a pandemic, you know, aversion to discomfort spoken about 186 00:12:50,120 --> 00:12:52,240 Speaker 1: a lot of times. People want the work, they don't 187 00:12:52,280 --> 00:12:57,120 Speaker 1: want the pain, self limiting thinking, crap, self esteem, and 188 00:12:57,200 --> 00:13:02,240 Speaker 1: so on. And the truth is that at some stage, 189 00:13:02,679 --> 00:13:05,000 Speaker 1: should we really want to move forward, we need to 190 00:13:05,080 --> 00:13:08,040 Speaker 1: feel what we feel. Feel lazy, feel not good enough, 191 00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:11,920 Speaker 1: feel like a fraud, feel like an impostor, but nonetheless 192 00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:17,480 Speaker 1: start the ball rolling. I've spent most of my life 193 00:13:17,760 --> 00:13:21,280 Speaker 1: still feeling like the insecure, fat kid that got picked 194 00:13:21,320 --> 00:13:24,040 Speaker 1: last for every sporting team. At some stages, I feel 195 00:13:24,080 --> 00:13:26,640 Speaker 1: like that. I don't feel like literally that, I just 196 00:13:27,040 --> 00:13:32,840 Speaker 1: that those emotional and psychological remnants live on. You know. 197 00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:35,200 Speaker 1: I could be in the middle of, like right now, 198 00:13:35,240 --> 00:13:38,160 Speaker 1: sharing this with you, at the same time feeling like, oh, 199 00:13:38,240 --> 00:13:40,160 Speaker 1: this is shit and no one's going to enjoy it. 200 00:13:40,280 --> 00:13:43,680 Speaker 1: Like that. Self doubt never fully goes away from me, 201 00:13:44,440 --> 00:13:47,480 Speaker 1: that imposter syndrome, not good enough, not smart enough, not 202 00:13:47,559 --> 00:13:52,120 Speaker 1: academic enough, not lean enough, not likable enough, not fucking 203 00:13:52,160 --> 00:13:55,320 Speaker 1: it what. That stuff never fully goes away. It doesn't 204 00:13:55,400 --> 00:14:00,560 Speaker 1: dominate me, it doesn't render me paralyzed. But do I 205 00:14:00,880 --> 00:14:05,360 Speaker 1: ever feel supremely confident? Never? I never feel that I 206 00:14:05,400 --> 00:14:09,800 Speaker 1: feel somewhat confident. I feel content and pretty calm and 207 00:14:09,920 --> 00:14:14,240 Speaker 1: pretty satisfied most of the time. But what I know 208 00:14:15,080 --> 00:14:21,240 Speaker 1: is that the psychological awareness that I can do things, 209 00:14:21,440 --> 00:14:25,560 Speaker 1: I'm not useless. I can succeed, I can write well, 210 00:14:25,600 --> 00:14:28,240 Speaker 1: I can speak well, I can talk to an audience. 211 00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:32,840 Speaker 1: I can build a business and brand, while also knowing 212 00:14:32,880 --> 00:14:34,680 Speaker 1: that I've fucked up a lot of things and all 213 00:14:34,720 --> 00:14:39,160 Speaker 1: of that. But that knowledge that I can do well, oh, 214 00:14:39,280 --> 00:14:44,160 Speaker 1: exists at the same time with those feelings, those emotions 215 00:14:44,160 --> 00:14:49,040 Speaker 1: of inadequacy and self doubt and periodic self loathing. And 216 00:14:49,080 --> 00:14:53,840 Speaker 1: that's not weird or broken or terrible. That's normal. Even 217 00:14:53,880 --> 00:14:56,160 Speaker 1: the people that I've worked with that many of you 218 00:14:56,200 --> 00:14:59,120 Speaker 1: would know that are high performers in the in the 219 00:14:59,200 --> 00:15:03,920 Speaker 1: areas of thoughts or politics, or media or entertainment or 220 00:15:04,480 --> 00:15:07,320 Speaker 1: the creative arts. Some of the people that I've worked 221 00:15:07,320 --> 00:15:13,520 Speaker 1: with that are wildly successful are also insecure, also riddled 222 00:15:13,520 --> 00:15:18,440 Speaker 1: with self doubt, also have self esteem issues, also could 223 00:15:18,520 --> 00:15:23,360 Speaker 1: talk themselves into analysis paralysis in a second. So if 224 00:15:23,400 --> 00:15:26,360 Speaker 1: any of that is you. That is not a reason 225 00:15:27,160 --> 00:15:33,000 Speaker 1: to not succeed. You can be scared and successful. You 226 00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:38,280 Speaker 1: can be inherently kind of naturally lazy while choosing to 227 00:15:38,320 --> 00:15:42,120 Speaker 1: be active and proactive. You can do that. You can 228 00:15:42,280 --> 00:15:49,120 Speaker 1: override things. My genetic default setting is endomorphic, which is 229 00:15:49,160 --> 00:15:53,000 Speaker 1: I gain fat very easily. But my genetics don't need 230 00:15:53,040 --> 00:15:56,960 Speaker 1: to be my destiny because what I look, feel, and 231 00:15:56,960 --> 00:16:00,840 Speaker 1: function like is about twenty to thirty percent about my genetics. 232 00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:03,760 Speaker 1: The rest is about what I do, and what I 233 00:16:03,840 --> 00:16:06,720 Speaker 1: do is optional. What I eat is optional, how I 234 00:16:06,760 --> 00:16:10,640 Speaker 1: live is optional. How I move my body, whether or 235 00:16:10,640 --> 00:16:13,000 Speaker 1: not I drink booze or use drugs, or how I 236 00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:15,680 Speaker 1: sleep or how much I sleep, or how I put 237 00:16:15,720 --> 00:16:20,880 Speaker 1: all this shit together. My over arching values, my overarching 238 00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:28,480 Speaker 1: operating system for life. There are We can rationalize anything 239 00:16:29,080 --> 00:16:31,880 Speaker 1: if we want, if we want to come up with 240 00:16:31,960 --> 00:16:34,840 Speaker 1: a reason why we're not succeeding, and life's not fair 241 00:16:34,920 --> 00:16:37,360 Speaker 1: and my mum did this or my dad. And I'm 242 00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:39,880 Speaker 1: not trying to be disrespectful to people who've been through 243 00:16:39,960 --> 00:16:43,440 Speaker 1: legit trauma. Of course we recognize that and respect that, 244 00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:46,360 Speaker 1: but at the same time, guess what a lot of 245 00:16:46,360 --> 00:16:49,120 Speaker 1: people have been through trauma and a lot of people 246 00:16:49,200 --> 00:16:53,120 Speaker 1: have been through some horrible shit. I interviewed Joelsarti the 247 00:16:53,160 --> 00:16:57,120 Speaker 1: other day, who's speaking on our program, who went to Afghanistan, 248 00:16:57,240 --> 00:17:00,320 Speaker 1: served for Australia in the military, spent eight months there 249 00:17:01,280 --> 00:17:04,960 Speaker 1: on an active tour, came back, was having a quick 250 00:17:05,040 --> 00:17:08,399 Speaker 1: break before he went back to Afghanistan, fell over, railing, 251 00:17:08,720 --> 00:17:12,120 Speaker 1: railing on some stairs, broke his neck, broke his neck 252 00:17:13,160 --> 00:17:15,679 Speaker 1: is a quadriplegic. Now, if anyone's got a reason to 253 00:17:15,720 --> 00:17:18,520 Speaker 1: get stuck, it's that, dude. If you want to rationalize 254 00:17:18,600 --> 00:17:22,640 Speaker 1: doing nothing, feeling sorry for yourself, being in a holding pattern, 255 00:17:23,200 --> 00:17:25,560 Speaker 1: you know, getting stuck in all kinds of ways, you 256 00:17:25,560 --> 00:17:28,560 Speaker 1: would look at, at least from the outside looking in, 257 00:17:28,640 --> 00:17:32,040 Speaker 1: and look at that scenario and what happened to Jijol 258 00:17:32,080 --> 00:17:34,040 Speaker 1: and go, man, I get it. I get it. But 259 00:17:34,119 --> 00:17:37,960 Speaker 1: guess what, He's not stuck in the middle of the 260 00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:40,320 Speaker 1: mess and the mayhem and the pain and the dysfunction 261 00:17:40,960 --> 00:17:45,640 Speaker 1: and the physiological limitations and all of the challenges, massive 262 00:17:45,800 --> 00:17:48,879 Speaker 1: challenges of adapting to a brand new life in a 263 00:17:48,920 --> 00:17:51,040 Speaker 1: body that doesn't work as it once did. In the 264 00:17:51,040 --> 00:17:54,760 Speaker 1: middle of all of that, he's growing and he's learning 265 00:17:54,800 --> 00:17:58,520 Speaker 1: and he's developing skills and insight and awareness, and he's courageous, 266 00:17:58,560 --> 00:18:04,240 Speaker 1: and he's doing fucking amazing shit. And you can do too. 267 00:18:05,240 --> 00:18:07,920 Speaker 1: We all can. It doesn't mean we can all do anything. 268 00:18:08,760 --> 00:18:10,840 Speaker 1: We can't all run one hundred meters in ten seconds, 269 00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:13,879 Speaker 1: we can't all win a Grammy. We can't all become 270 00:18:13,960 --> 00:18:17,560 Speaker 1: president or prime minister. We can't just practically, we can't 271 00:18:19,720 --> 00:18:22,280 Speaker 1: because we can't have a million prime ministers at once. 272 00:18:22,760 --> 00:18:25,080 Speaker 1: But there's a lot of stuff that we can do. 273 00:18:25,359 --> 00:18:28,879 Speaker 1: There's a lot of stuff that we can do. So 274 00:18:29,160 --> 00:18:32,399 Speaker 1: let's have a look at some ideas on how to 275 00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:36,040 Speaker 1: get unstuck. So I've got a list for you, because 276 00:18:36,720 --> 00:18:39,879 Speaker 1: you know the occasional list doesn't hurt. Number one is, 277 00:18:39,920 --> 00:18:45,159 Speaker 1: recognize your stuckness. Like that, Recognize that you are stuck, 278 00:18:45,240 --> 00:18:47,720 Speaker 1: that you are trapped, that you are in a holding pattern, 279 00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:50,480 Speaker 1: that you are spinning your wheels, whatever metaphor you want 280 00:18:50,520 --> 00:18:54,320 Speaker 1: to what to use, but recognize that you are stuck 281 00:18:54,400 --> 00:18:59,760 Speaker 1: and identify the cause. So for a very long time, 282 00:19:00,080 --> 00:19:06,280 Speaker 1: for example, with my body, my starkness, my holding pattern, 283 00:19:06,359 --> 00:19:11,480 Speaker 1: my inability to look or feel or perform or achieve 284 00:19:11,520 --> 00:19:20,080 Speaker 1: the level of health and performance, and body composition that 285 00:19:20,200 --> 00:19:24,600 Speaker 1: I wanted for me. The cause was food, specifically, my 286 00:19:24,720 --> 00:19:29,760 Speaker 1: relationship with food, specifically, how I thought about food, how 287 00:19:29,800 --> 00:19:34,320 Speaker 1: I chose food, how I behaved with food and around food, 288 00:19:34,600 --> 00:19:39,560 Speaker 1: how I socialized, how I bullshitted myself with food, how 289 00:19:39,560 --> 00:19:43,520 Speaker 1: I lied to people. People would ask me about what 290 00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:45,800 Speaker 1: I eat, and I would be too embarrassed at times 291 00:19:45,840 --> 00:19:48,280 Speaker 1: to tell them really what I ate sometimes, so I 292 00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:52,280 Speaker 1: would make up some bullshit to sound good, And so 293 00:19:52,520 --> 00:19:54,919 Speaker 1: I was in a holding pattern. I was stuck. I 294 00:19:54,960 --> 00:19:58,520 Speaker 1: had this toxic, destructive relationship with food. By the way, 295 00:19:58,600 --> 00:20:01,600 Speaker 1: food wasn't the problem is the problem. It's just that 296 00:20:01,680 --> 00:20:06,720 Speaker 1: food was the epicenter of the problem. And so that 297 00:20:06,880 --> 00:20:09,600 Speaker 1: was for me, you know, owning up and stepping up 298 00:20:09,640 --> 00:20:11,600 Speaker 1: and being honest and raw and real. And the reason 299 00:20:11,640 --> 00:20:14,199 Speaker 1: that I share that this was part of my journey 300 00:20:14,240 --> 00:20:17,359 Speaker 1: is because I know other people do the same. I 301 00:20:17,400 --> 00:20:20,000 Speaker 1: know that I don't live on an island in this respect. 302 00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:22,960 Speaker 1: I'm not Robinson Cruz. I'm not the only person to 303 00:20:23,040 --> 00:20:26,480 Speaker 1: have done this. I've spoken to maybe thousands of people 304 00:20:26,480 --> 00:20:30,760 Speaker 1: who have very very complicated relationships with their body, very 305 00:20:30,840 --> 00:20:35,040 Speaker 1: complicated relationships with food and with exercise and with self 306 00:20:35,160 --> 00:20:39,159 Speaker 1: esteem and with body image and body dysmorphia. And I 307 00:20:39,200 --> 00:20:41,399 Speaker 1: think the starting point for a lot of us, the 308 00:20:41,680 --> 00:20:45,880 Speaker 1: unstuck getting unstuck starting point is just being fucking honest. 309 00:20:47,280 --> 00:20:52,560 Speaker 1: I eat shit. I don't need the end not ah, yeah, 310 00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:55,920 Speaker 1: but my genetics. But yeah, but you know, I didn't 311 00:20:55,920 --> 00:20:57,800 Speaker 1: want to offend anyone, but oh it was all I 312 00:20:57,800 --> 00:20:59,920 Speaker 1: could get my hands on. Ah, but it was my birthday, 313 00:21:00,240 --> 00:21:03,800 Speaker 1: but it was it was you know, and you're fifty there, 314 00:21:04,960 --> 00:21:07,760 Speaker 1: and now you're fifty and you're still telling yourself why 315 00:21:08,880 --> 00:21:14,280 Speaker 1: you're not doing the things that you allegedly want to do. Like, 316 00:21:14,359 --> 00:21:16,880 Speaker 1: you will not accidentally get in great shape. You will 317 00:21:16,920 --> 00:21:21,159 Speaker 1: not accidentally have a fucking awesome body, awesome health, amazing 318 00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:25,639 Speaker 1: immune system. You will not accidentally run a fucking marathon 319 00:21:25,800 --> 00:21:27,960 Speaker 1: or whatever it is that or build a business or 320 00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:32,960 Speaker 1: build a brand, or do an undergrad degree or overcoming it. 321 00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:36,480 Speaker 1: You'll not accidentally do these things. We need to acknowledge 322 00:21:36,520 --> 00:21:41,560 Speaker 1: the reality of us. This is why I'm doing a 323 00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:44,240 Speaker 1: Part of why I'm doing a PhD in self awareness, 324 00:21:44,320 --> 00:21:48,000 Speaker 1: literally is because self awareness with so much of this 325 00:21:48,080 --> 00:21:53,720 Speaker 1: stuff is the starting point. Not self loathing, not self hate, 326 00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:57,800 Speaker 1: self awareness, This is what I'm doing. Okay, my life's 327 00:21:57,840 --> 00:22:02,560 Speaker 1: not working in this text. What part of the problem 328 00:22:02,560 --> 00:22:05,800 Speaker 1: am I? It's not to say you're always the totality 329 00:22:05,800 --> 00:22:08,679 Speaker 1: of the problem, but let's just be brave for a 330 00:22:08,720 --> 00:22:12,200 Speaker 1: moment and courageous and grown up and mature and let's go, yeah, look, 331 00:22:12,760 --> 00:22:16,600 Speaker 1: at least I'm part of the problem, all right. Number 332 00:22:16,640 --> 00:22:19,760 Speaker 1: two is this identify the thing that you're not doing 333 00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:25,960 Speaker 1: that you should be doing. So what might that be 334 00:22:26,040 --> 00:22:31,680 Speaker 1: for you? Maybe that is maybe that is you need 335 00:22:31,720 --> 00:22:34,520 Speaker 1: to study thirty minutes every morning. Maybe that is you 336 00:22:34,640 --> 00:22:38,959 Speaker 1: need to start having a cold shower every day. Maybe 337 00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:42,520 Speaker 1: that is you need to commit to some I don't 338 00:22:42,560 --> 00:22:46,080 Speaker 1: know what it is, doesn't matter. It could be something 339 00:22:46,119 --> 00:22:48,919 Speaker 1: to do with your kids or your partner. Could be 340 00:22:48,960 --> 00:22:51,359 Speaker 1: something to do with your career. Could be something to 341 00:22:51,359 --> 00:22:54,520 Speaker 1: do with your physical, mental, or emotional health. It could 342 00:22:54,600 --> 00:22:59,000 Speaker 1: be something to do with a toxic relationship that you 343 00:22:59,119 --> 00:23:01,400 Speaker 1: need to deal with. It could be something to do 344 00:23:01,480 --> 00:23:07,439 Speaker 1: with your lifestyle. It could be a million things. But 345 00:23:07,560 --> 00:23:11,000 Speaker 1: what is the thing that you're not doing that you 346 00:23:11,119 --> 00:23:15,560 Speaker 1: know you should be. Number three is kind of an 347 00:23:15,560 --> 00:23:21,119 Speaker 1: expansion of that, and that is to do a stop, 348 00:23:21,200 --> 00:23:28,359 Speaker 1: take or audit on what's working and what's not working 349 00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:33,600 Speaker 1: on planet you. And this is not something that you 350 00:23:33,720 --> 00:23:37,560 Speaker 1: do in three minutes driving to work, listening to the radio, 351 00:23:37,840 --> 00:23:41,720 Speaker 1: looking for a park. This is something that I think 352 00:23:41,760 --> 00:23:44,680 Speaker 1: really we need to take seriously about when we talk 353 00:23:44,720 --> 00:23:51,440 Speaker 1: about living consciously. We spoke before about unconscious stuff and 354 00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:55,200 Speaker 1: how you know. In many ways, for a range of reasons, 355 00:23:55,800 --> 00:23:59,439 Speaker 1: many of us are periodic passengers in our own life. 356 00:24:00,840 --> 00:24:03,400 Speaker 1: That is, life has its own energy, Life has its 357 00:24:03,440 --> 00:24:10,359 Speaker 1: own life force, Life has its own momentum, and life 358 00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:15,920 Speaker 1: happens despite us. Life keeps going on, and the things 359 00:24:15,960 --> 00:24:18,080 Speaker 1: that we are in the middle of have their own 360 00:24:18,119 --> 00:24:22,119 Speaker 1: momentum and energy as well. And sometimes we need to 361 00:24:22,160 --> 00:24:25,840 Speaker 1: get out of that river, that ever flowing river that 362 00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:29,119 Speaker 1: we are sitting in our canoe just being swept, that 363 00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:31,000 Speaker 1: we need to paddle to the side. We need to 364 00:24:31,040 --> 00:24:34,199 Speaker 1: get to the metaphoric bank, pull up our canoe and 365 00:24:34,200 --> 00:24:37,640 Speaker 1: our paddle, sit on the metaphoric rock and just take 366 00:24:37,720 --> 00:24:41,360 Speaker 1: a minute. Take a minute, get out of the river, 367 00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:43,679 Speaker 1: get out of the momentum, get out of the busyness, 368 00:24:44,040 --> 00:24:46,720 Speaker 1: get out of the never endingness, even if it's for 369 00:24:46,800 --> 00:24:52,200 Speaker 1: thirty minutes to sit. No phone no computer, no distractions, 370 00:24:52,320 --> 00:24:58,399 Speaker 1: just you thinking about how's my life going? How is 371 00:24:58,720 --> 00:25:07,200 Speaker 1: my life going, how's my body going? What about my rituals? 372 00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:12,840 Speaker 1: What about my social life? What about my sleep? What 373 00:25:12,920 --> 00:25:15,680 Speaker 1: about my self talk? What about my mental health? How's 374 00:25:15,720 --> 00:25:20,359 Speaker 1: that going on? What's that about? What about? What about 375 00:25:20,359 --> 00:25:23,639 Speaker 1: the results that I'm producing? Are they the results I 376 00:25:23,680 --> 00:25:26,000 Speaker 1: want to produce? If not, why not? What am I doing? 377 00:25:26,600 --> 00:25:30,679 Speaker 1: What could I do better? One of the challenges for 378 00:25:30,840 --> 00:25:38,440 Speaker 1: us is that, obviously my world view is subjective. All 379 00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:42,560 Speaker 1: of my experiences are influenced by the goings on in 380 00:25:42,560 --> 00:25:46,080 Speaker 1: my external world, but ultimately created by me. And when 381 00:25:46,080 --> 00:25:48,119 Speaker 1: I say me, I say my brain, my mind, my 382 00:25:48,240 --> 00:25:53,520 Speaker 1: data processing center. I am always doing a subjective assessment, 383 00:25:54,080 --> 00:25:59,760 Speaker 1: an interpretation of objective things. Something happens to me around 384 00:25:59,760 --> 00:26:04,440 Speaker 1: me despite me, a person, a situation and outcome, a result, 385 00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:09,520 Speaker 1: the weather, some piece of news. Then what I do, 386 00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:13,879 Speaker 1: automatically and almost unconsciously, is I break it down and 387 00:26:13,920 --> 00:26:18,800 Speaker 1: I give it meaning. And one of the challenges for us, 388 00:26:18,840 --> 00:26:21,680 Speaker 1: in the continuity and the never endingness of the human 389 00:26:21,760 --> 00:26:30,320 Speaker 1: experience and the never ending stream of information and energy 390 00:26:30,560 --> 00:26:35,240 Speaker 1: and people and events, is to be able to find 391 00:26:35,280 --> 00:26:40,800 Speaker 1: some space, some metaphoric space, sometimes some literal space to say, well, 392 00:26:40,800 --> 00:26:45,440 Speaker 1: here I am, I'm thirty, I'm forty, I'm fifty. How 393 00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:49,480 Speaker 1: long have I been thinking about changing these things? How 394 00:26:49,520 --> 00:26:53,359 Speaker 1: many times have I had the same story or told 395 00:26:53,440 --> 00:26:56,520 Speaker 1: myself the same or others the same story about the 396 00:26:56,560 --> 00:26:59,119 Speaker 1: same things that I'm going to change soon. I'm going 397 00:26:59,200 --> 00:27:03,000 Speaker 1: to I'm doing it soon. But here I am and 398 00:27:03,040 --> 00:27:08,159 Speaker 1: now I'm fifty and I'm not doing it. What are 399 00:27:08,200 --> 00:27:12,879 Speaker 1: the things that on planet me are not working? And 400 00:27:12,920 --> 00:27:14,439 Speaker 1: what are the things that are working? What are my 401 00:27:14,480 --> 00:27:17,080 Speaker 1: results telling me? What's my life telling me? What are 402 00:27:17,080 --> 00:27:22,520 Speaker 1: my relationships telling me? Things won't accidentally get better. You 403 00:27:22,560 --> 00:27:27,480 Speaker 1: and I will do the audit. We will observe the thing, 404 00:27:27,640 --> 00:27:30,320 Speaker 1: recognize the thing, We'll take ownership of the thing, and 405 00:27:30,359 --> 00:27:32,480 Speaker 1: then will work to change the thing that needs to 406 00:27:32,520 --> 00:27:36,320 Speaker 1: be changed, or we won't. That's up to you, that's 407 00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:39,200 Speaker 1: up to me. Number four on my how to get 408 00:27:39,280 --> 00:27:43,080 Speaker 1: Unstuck list is choose to do what scares you. That 409 00:27:43,240 --> 00:27:44,960 Speaker 1: is the thing that you need to do to create 410 00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:47,679 Speaker 1: the outcome you want. I'm not just talking about what 411 00:27:47,720 --> 00:27:49,399 Speaker 1: scares you running in front of a truck. Do that, 412 00:27:49,440 --> 00:27:51,960 Speaker 1: And no, of course not I'm talking about strategic, intelligent, 413 00:27:52,640 --> 00:27:58,480 Speaker 1: purpose driven facing your fear. Be courageous. Your goal is 414 00:27:58,520 --> 00:28:02,359 Speaker 1: not to be fearless. Your goal is not to eradicate 415 00:28:02,440 --> 00:28:07,800 Speaker 1: all self doubt. Your goal is, despite your fear, despite 416 00:28:07,800 --> 00:28:12,679 Speaker 1: your overthinking, despite your self doubt, despite your insecurity, do 417 00:28:12,840 --> 00:28:19,600 Speaker 1: something really fucking brave because you can. Because you can. 418 00:28:19,680 --> 00:28:22,639 Speaker 1: I know you don't want to sometimes, I know that 419 00:28:22,760 --> 00:28:26,159 Speaker 1: you doubt yourself. At the very least, you're going to 420 00:28:26,240 --> 00:28:29,560 Speaker 1: have an experience. You might fuck up, you might fall 421 00:28:29,600 --> 00:28:33,399 Speaker 1: down metaphorically, you might get it wrong, and then at 422 00:28:33,400 --> 00:28:36,280 Speaker 1: the end of that you have a challenge. By the way, 423 00:28:36,320 --> 00:28:38,280 Speaker 1: you might get it right, might be fucking great. Whatever 424 00:28:38,280 --> 00:28:41,640 Speaker 1: the outcome is, you're going to learn something. You're going 425 00:28:41,680 --> 00:28:44,840 Speaker 1: to learn something. I've spent years doing things that didn't work. 426 00:28:44,880 --> 00:28:48,640 Speaker 1: In fact, most of the things that I tried, at 427 00:28:48,720 --> 00:28:52,120 Speaker 1: least initially didn't work, or I got a four out 428 00:28:52,120 --> 00:28:54,760 Speaker 1: of ten, not a ten out of ten outcome, sometimes 429 00:28:54,760 --> 00:28:58,920 Speaker 1: a minus two out of ten. And that is because 430 00:28:59,320 --> 00:29:03,080 Speaker 1: I knew. I knew that I well, I didn't know. 431 00:29:03,160 --> 00:29:06,320 Speaker 1: Actually I thought that I could probably do this thing eventually, 432 00:29:06,360 --> 00:29:08,480 Speaker 1: But in the moment, at the start, I knew that 433 00:29:08,520 --> 00:29:10,560 Speaker 1: I wouldn't win. I knew that I wouldn't get it right. 434 00:29:10,920 --> 00:29:12,840 Speaker 1: I knew that it wouldn't be perfect. I knew that 435 00:29:12,880 --> 00:29:15,600 Speaker 1: it would be flawed. But I also knew that that 436 00:29:15,680 --> 00:29:20,240 Speaker 1: imperfection and that flaw and that three or two out 437 00:29:20,280 --> 00:29:24,160 Speaker 1: of ten result was a pathway. It was a conduit 438 00:29:24,240 --> 00:29:29,440 Speaker 1: to understanding and skill and development and growth and better outcomes. 439 00:29:30,600 --> 00:29:33,480 Speaker 1: It's in the middle of doing the things that scare 440 00:29:33,600 --> 00:29:37,160 Speaker 1: me that I get better. It's in the middle of 441 00:29:37,200 --> 00:29:40,640 Speaker 1: doing the things that I'm uncomfortable with, that I'm unfamiliar with, 442 00:29:40,840 --> 00:29:44,160 Speaker 1: around which there is little or no certainty. It's in 443 00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:46,719 Speaker 1: the middle of that that I become the best version 444 00:29:46,760 --> 00:29:50,960 Speaker 1: of me. It's in the middle of letting fear control 445 00:29:51,040 --> 00:29:54,520 Speaker 1: me that I become the worst version of me. Because 446 00:29:54,560 --> 00:29:57,360 Speaker 1: if I don't manage my fear, it will manage me. 447 00:29:58,600 --> 00:30:02,320 Speaker 1: And I do want to not be ah a prisoner 448 00:30:02,480 --> 00:30:08,600 Speaker 1: in my own emotions, and neither do you. Number five 449 00:30:08,760 --> 00:30:15,760 Speaker 1: is practical, not sexy, not mind blowing. Number five is 450 00:30:15,880 --> 00:30:18,680 Speaker 1: right yourself for to do list, and that might just 451 00:30:18,720 --> 00:30:20,960 Speaker 1: be two things, that might be two hundred things. Let's 452 00:30:21,160 --> 00:30:24,800 Speaker 1: probably not go with two hundred Right yourself a to 453 00:30:24,840 --> 00:30:29,560 Speaker 1: do list and fully commit to it, Like fully, this 454 00:30:29,760 --> 00:30:33,960 Speaker 1: is me, Now, this is what I do. Now, remove 455 00:30:34,000 --> 00:30:38,320 Speaker 1: the escape clause and the safety net, take away the 456 00:30:38,440 --> 00:30:44,160 Speaker 1: get out a jail card. Tell somebody else, perhaps, so 457 00:30:44,280 --> 00:30:51,320 Speaker 1: that now you've got a level of accountability. Take the 458 00:30:51,360 --> 00:30:53,920 Speaker 1: emotion whatever it is that you feel, the thing that 459 00:30:53,960 --> 00:30:56,640 Speaker 1: you want to do, that you're excited about but scared 460 00:30:57,000 --> 00:31:01,360 Speaker 1: to do. And then with that emotion, that excitement, that goal, 461 00:31:01,480 --> 00:31:04,560 Speaker 1: that vision, that dream, that thing that you want to change, 462 00:31:04,600 --> 00:31:07,120 Speaker 1: that thing that you are moved to change or do 463 00:31:07,280 --> 00:31:10,920 Speaker 1: or be or create, take that emotion and wrap it 464 00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:13,800 Speaker 1: in a strategy, Wrap it in a plan, Wrap it 465 00:31:13,800 --> 00:31:18,320 Speaker 1: in logic, wrap it in accountability, wrap it in wrap it. 466 00:31:18,480 --> 00:31:23,800 Speaker 1: I'm not saying rabid rap wrap wrap it in something 467 00:31:23,960 --> 00:31:32,400 Speaker 1: which is almost impossible for you to not operationalize. In 468 00:31:32,440 --> 00:31:38,080 Speaker 1: other words, do so many people set themselves kind of 469 00:31:38,160 --> 00:31:42,680 Speaker 1: a goal or write themselves a to do list, but 470 00:31:42,720 --> 00:31:47,320 Speaker 1: they're on no level committed. Like if I'm fully committed 471 00:31:47,360 --> 00:31:52,240 Speaker 1: to something, fully committed, I mean mentally, emotionally, behaviorally, one 472 00:31:52,960 --> 00:31:57,520 Speaker 1: boots and all. Then on the days when I don't 473 00:31:57,560 --> 00:32:02,520 Speaker 1: feel disciplined, I'm not you know, ah, inspired, I'm not motivated, 474 00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:05,720 Speaker 1: I'm not feeling it. I'm not loving it. It doesn't 475 00:32:05,760 --> 00:32:09,800 Speaker 1: matter because I'm fully committed. So barring sickness or injury 476 00:32:10,160 --> 00:32:14,239 Speaker 1: or some unavoidable reason, but barring that, I'm doing it. 477 00:32:14,280 --> 00:32:17,360 Speaker 1: And the reason that I'm doing it is because I 478 00:32:17,400 --> 00:32:20,880 Speaker 1: am fully invested and fully committed to this process to 479 00:32:20,920 --> 00:32:24,240 Speaker 1: create the thing I want to create. And we need 480 00:32:24,280 --> 00:32:28,840 Speaker 1: to get our head around the idea that this won't 481 00:32:28,920 --> 00:32:32,880 Speaker 1: be fun, quick, easy, or painless. And not only is 482 00:32:32,920 --> 00:32:35,160 Speaker 1: that okay, it's fucking great because in the middle of 483 00:32:35,240 --> 00:32:37,440 Speaker 1: all of that, I'm still going to I'm going to 484 00:32:37,480 --> 00:32:40,240 Speaker 1: create better results anyway because I'm doing the workhead down, 485 00:32:40,280 --> 00:32:43,760 Speaker 1: bum up, I'm focused. But also the bonus and maybe 486 00:32:43,800 --> 00:32:45,600 Speaker 1: even the real gift in the middle of all of this, 487 00:32:45,720 --> 00:32:50,480 Speaker 1: is that I'm becoming better. I am making me a 488 00:32:50,560 --> 00:32:53,960 Speaker 1: stronger me, a better me, a more resilient me, a 489 00:32:54,000 --> 00:32:58,960 Speaker 1: more capable me, a more resourceful creative me, and hopefully 490 00:32:59,040 --> 00:33:03,000 Speaker 1: a better me others a better leader, a better communicator, 491 00:33:03,040 --> 00:33:06,080 Speaker 1: a better dad, a better mum, a better sister, a 492 00:33:06,080 --> 00:33:08,959 Speaker 1: better brother, a better friend, a better problem solver, a 493 00:33:08,960 --> 00:33:13,479 Speaker 1: better creator. Like this is kind of the refiner's fire, 494 00:33:14,240 --> 00:33:17,880 Speaker 1: where we put ourselves in the fire of that challenge 495 00:33:18,200 --> 00:33:23,400 Speaker 1: and we come out the other side. Ah, So that 496 00:33:23,520 --> 00:33:27,200 Speaker 1: was five and six. Number seven is extricate yourself from 497 00:33:27,280 --> 00:33:32,600 Speaker 1: people who perpetuate your stuckness. Oh, I'll say that again. 498 00:33:33,520 --> 00:33:37,760 Speaker 1: Extricate yourself from the people who from people who perpetuate 499 00:33:37,800 --> 00:33:43,960 Speaker 1: your stuckness. In other words, as much as possible. And 500 00:33:44,000 --> 00:33:45,520 Speaker 1: I know there are a lot of variables around this. 501 00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:47,760 Speaker 1: You say, yeah, cool, Craig, but what if one of 502 00:33:47,760 --> 00:33:50,520 Speaker 1: those people is my partner, or my brother, or my 503 00:33:51,520 --> 00:33:54,400 Speaker 1: sister or my Barcelma. I get it. And so that's 504 00:33:54,440 --> 00:33:57,240 Speaker 1: why this is global, that's why this is broad in general, 505 00:33:57,280 --> 00:34:00,280 Speaker 1: but as much as possible. When you realize that there 506 00:34:00,360 --> 00:34:04,400 Speaker 1: is a personal person's on planet you and we're not 507 00:34:04,480 --> 00:34:07,560 Speaker 1: blaming them, but we realize that perhaps they are a contributor, 508 00:34:09,160 --> 00:34:14,160 Speaker 1: then either if possible, if possible and appropriate, we extricate 509 00:34:14,200 --> 00:34:19,000 Speaker 1: ourselves from that relationship or that environment, or we perhaps 510 00:34:19,160 --> 00:34:23,120 Speaker 1: change the dynamic, that is, we maybe see them less, 511 00:34:23,160 --> 00:34:26,279 Speaker 1: we maybe realize there are certain conversations we don't have 512 00:34:26,400 --> 00:34:29,360 Speaker 1: with them. There are people in my life virtue of 513 00:34:29,960 --> 00:34:36,799 Speaker 1: situation and circumstance who are over my journey, have not 514 00:34:36,920 --> 00:34:42,640 Speaker 1: been encouraging or supportive and that's okay. Have not had 515 00:34:42,719 --> 00:34:46,399 Speaker 1: faith in me or confidence in me, and have at 516 00:34:46,520 --> 00:34:52,320 Speaker 1: times undermined, questioned, and done a whole lot of things 517 00:34:52,360 --> 00:34:56,880 Speaker 1: that really did not help me to move forward to 518 00:34:56,880 --> 00:34:58,799 Speaker 1: grow to a vole. In fact, if I had have 519 00:34:59,280 --> 00:35:01,840 Speaker 1: paid too much attention, and I did pay too much attention, 520 00:35:01,920 --> 00:35:04,400 Speaker 1: but if I hadn't have been able to extricate myself 521 00:35:04,680 --> 00:35:08,040 Speaker 1: from that influence, I would not have done a lot 522 00:35:08,080 --> 00:35:10,200 Speaker 1: of the things I've done. And I'm definitely no high 523 00:35:10,200 --> 00:35:13,239 Speaker 1: watermark for success or post a boyd for success. But 524 00:35:13,280 --> 00:35:15,560 Speaker 1: I've done some really cool things and I'm very happy 525 00:35:15,600 --> 00:35:19,520 Speaker 1: and proud of that. But I realize that there are 526 00:35:19,600 --> 00:35:23,759 Speaker 1: certain people that although I may have to have a 527 00:35:23,840 --> 00:35:28,520 Speaker 1: relationship with them courtesy of just my life or situation, 528 00:35:30,239 --> 00:35:33,839 Speaker 1: there are certain people that I won't have particular conversations with, 529 00:35:33,920 --> 00:35:36,480 Speaker 1: I won't open certain doors. And that doesn't mean I 530 00:35:36,520 --> 00:35:38,480 Speaker 1: hate those people are dislike them. It doesn't mean that 531 00:35:38,560 --> 00:35:43,759 Speaker 1: at all. It just means it just means that there 532 00:35:43,800 --> 00:35:47,319 Speaker 1: are there will always be people who don't understand you, 533 00:35:47,640 --> 00:35:55,000 Speaker 1: or your potential, or your possibilities or your vision. And 534 00:35:55,040 --> 00:35:57,920 Speaker 1: that's okay. We're not about hating on people. We're just 535 00:35:57,960 --> 00:36:01,239 Speaker 1: about realizing, Okay, I need to And by the way, 536 00:36:01,280 --> 00:36:03,440 Speaker 1: we're not just looking for people who tell us what 537 00:36:03,480 --> 00:36:06,399 Speaker 1: we want to hear. That's the opposite of what we need. 538 00:36:07,280 --> 00:36:12,480 Speaker 1: But we're talking about people who people who genuinely love 539 00:36:12,560 --> 00:36:14,960 Speaker 1: us and care about us and will support us, but 540 00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:20,200 Speaker 1: also give us intelligent, critical feedback, you know, when required. 541 00:36:20,920 --> 00:36:23,040 Speaker 1: So we don't need the haters, and we don't need 542 00:36:23,080 --> 00:36:27,200 Speaker 1: the over the top, gushy, backslapping, you know, support group. 543 00:36:27,280 --> 00:36:30,200 Speaker 1: We don't need that because that can create problems of itself. 544 00:36:31,040 --> 00:36:34,120 Speaker 1: But just realize that who you hang around with matters. 545 00:36:35,480 --> 00:36:37,560 Speaker 1: In other words, hang out with people who drag you up. 546 00:36:38,239 --> 00:36:40,439 Speaker 1: So that I kind of meshed seven and eight there. 547 00:36:40,480 --> 00:36:44,200 Speaker 1: So number nine is this do new things again? What 548 00:36:44,239 --> 00:36:46,759 Speaker 1: are we talking about. We're talking about getting unstuck. Do 549 00:36:46,920 --> 00:36:52,680 Speaker 1: new things, step into unfamiliar territory. I know that when 550 00:36:52,800 --> 00:36:55,839 Speaker 1: I do new things with new people in new environments, 551 00:36:56,800 --> 00:37:00,080 Speaker 1: I expose myself to new ideas. I expose myself to 552 00:37:00,960 --> 00:37:04,879 Speaker 1: even different cultures and conversations and people. When I do 553 00:37:04,920 --> 00:37:11,319 Speaker 1: something unme all of a sudden, I'm doing something new 554 00:37:11,480 --> 00:37:13,960 Speaker 1: in a way that I've never done it, perhaps different place, 555 00:37:14,600 --> 00:37:18,880 Speaker 1: different experiences, and it opens my brain. It makes me 556 00:37:19,040 --> 00:37:21,680 Speaker 1: realize that I've been living in a corridor or an 557 00:37:21,719 --> 00:37:26,799 Speaker 1: echo chamber. At times, when we have new experiences, it 558 00:37:26,960 --> 00:37:30,520 Speaker 1: exposes us to things that we are generally not exposed 559 00:37:30,560 --> 00:37:34,680 Speaker 1: to in our day to day. Sometimes it builds or 560 00:37:34,840 --> 00:37:39,680 Speaker 1: arouses curiosity. Sometimes it creates awareness or insights. Sometimes it 561 00:37:39,719 --> 00:37:44,759 Speaker 1: gives us a different understanding. Sometimes it creates momentum. You know, 562 00:37:44,800 --> 00:37:47,600 Speaker 1: for example, the amount of people that I have worked 563 00:37:47,640 --> 00:37:50,719 Speaker 1: with over the years that have done something physical which 564 00:37:50,800 --> 00:37:54,840 Speaker 1: was a challenge for the first time, and I coached 565 00:37:54,840 --> 00:37:57,280 Speaker 1: them towards that. They did the work, they did the event, 566 00:37:57,320 --> 00:37:59,520 Speaker 1: they got the outcome, not me, but I supported and 567 00:37:59,600 --> 00:38:02,480 Speaker 1: coached them towards that. So somebody who'd never run in 568 00:38:02,520 --> 00:38:07,880 Speaker 1: their life, never run one kilometer, always consider themselves unfit, unhealthy, 569 00:38:07,920 --> 00:38:12,680 Speaker 1: a complete non athlete. People I've trained up to eventually 570 00:38:12,719 --> 00:38:15,680 Speaker 1: do marathons, but even say a ten k or a 571 00:38:15,719 --> 00:38:20,640 Speaker 1: five k fun run. When something amazing happens, when people 572 00:38:20,719 --> 00:38:25,200 Speaker 1: do shit that they never thought they could do and 573 00:38:25,239 --> 00:38:29,399 Speaker 1: they get unstuck, they get unstuck, they get out of 574 00:38:30,160 --> 00:38:36,759 Speaker 1: the groundhog danus of overthinking to an extent anyway, But 575 00:38:36,880 --> 00:38:39,760 Speaker 1: what it does is it opens It opens new doors. 576 00:38:40,080 --> 00:38:44,880 Speaker 1: It opens possibilities and understanding of possibilities and understanding of potential. 577 00:38:45,160 --> 00:38:48,560 Speaker 1: Because when people do something that they never thought they 578 00:38:48,560 --> 00:38:51,520 Speaker 1: could do, instantly they have a new belief. Or the 579 00:38:51,520 --> 00:38:53,600 Speaker 1: belief is I can run a marathon. I know because 580 00:38:53,600 --> 00:38:56,560 Speaker 1: I just ran one or a half marathon. The belief 581 00:38:56,680 --> 00:38:59,560 Speaker 1: is like, oh wow, I actually have more capacity and 582 00:38:59,640 --> 00:39:03,279 Speaker 1: moretential then I believed. I got it wrong? What else 583 00:39:03,320 --> 00:39:06,640 Speaker 1: did I get wrong? If I can do this, what 584 00:39:06,800 --> 00:39:09,680 Speaker 1: else can I do? If I can get out of 585 00:39:09,719 --> 00:39:12,200 Speaker 1: my own way and run a marathon, or register a 586 00:39:12,239 --> 00:39:14,839 Speaker 1: business or build a business, or do a degree, or 587 00:39:15,400 --> 00:39:20,240 Speaker 1: lose thirty kilos or menda relationship or overcome a distractive habit. 588 00:39:20,719 --> 00:39:23,000 Speaker 1: If I can do that, what else can I do? 589 00:39:23,080 --> 00:39:26,440 Speaker 1: And it's in the doing of especially new things that 590 00:39:26,480 --> 00:39:32,680 Speaker 1: we've never tried, that we change and that we open 591 00:39:32,719 --> 00:39:37,120 Speaker 1: new doors and we create momentum. You know, it seems 592 00:39:37,320 --> 00:39:41,239 Speaker 1: I'm kind of weird perhaps that I say I'm not 593 00:39:41,280 --> 00:39:45,880 Speaker 1: particularly academic, But I'm not particularly academic, That's just the truth. 594 00:39:45,960 --> 00:39:49,640 Speaker 1: But I'm in the middle of this academic journey right now, 595 00:39:50,680 --> 00:39:54,600 Speaker 1: and apart from the you know, the work, and hopefully 596 00:39:54,920 --> 00:39:57,839 Speaker 1: we'll see hopefully the outcome of a PhD and all 597 00:39:57,840 --> 00:40:01,040 Speaker 1: of that stuff, which is, you know, interesting, I guess 598 00:40:01,040 --> 00:40:02,959 Speaker 1: the good achievement and all that, But you know what's 599 00:40:03,000 --> 00:40:06,600 Speaker 1: really interesting for me is I just know so much 600 00:40:06,960 --> 00:40:11,279 Speaker 1: different stuff now. I just have a different insight. And 601 00:40:11,320 --> 00:40:14,000 Speaker 1: I'm not a better person than I was, but I've 602 00:40:14,080 --> 00:40:17,280 Speaker 1: had in the last four years of my PhD journey 603 00:40:17,400 --> 00:40:23,879 Speaker 1: so many new experiences, new conversations, new insights in new environments, 604 00:40:23,960 --> 00:40:29,360 Speaker 1: being exposed to new ideas, and just so much stuff 605 00:40:29,480 --> 00:40:33,280 Speaker 1: that is so different from the rest of my life 606 00:40:33,440 --> 00:40:38,400 Speaker 1: that it's fucking mind blowing. And it just and honestly like, 607 00:40:38,719 --> 00:40:41,439 Speaker 1: what are we now do I'm sixty next month, which 608 00:40:41,480 --> 00:40:47,279 Speaker 1: is fucking ridiculous, But I've never been maybe I've been 609 00:40:47,360 --> 00:40:50,239 Speaker 1: this excited, but I've never been more excited. I don't 610 00:40:50,239 --> 00:40:57,239 Speaker 1: think I've never been more curious, like to do, to 611 00:40:57,440 --> 00:41:02,319 Speaker 1: keep learning, to keep evolving, to keep optimizing everything from 612 00:41:02,320 --> 00:41:05,279 Speaker 1: my body to my brain, to my knowledge, to my performance, 613 00:41:05,320 --> 00:41:10,080 Speaker 1: to my emotional state, to my outcomes, to my relationships, 614 00:41:10,080 --> 00:41:12,400 Speaker 1: to my business and brand and all of those things. 615 00:41:12,480 --> 00:41:20,200 Speaker 1: I'm so fucking excited because my life is well. Fortunately, yeah, fortunately, 616 00:41:20,280 --> 00:41:23,880 Speaker 1: I'm very blessed and very lucky. I acknowledge that. But 617 00:41:23,960 --> 00:41:26,640 Speaker 1: at the same time, I've worked like a motherfucker for 618 00:41:26,640 --> 00:41:31,120 Speaker 1: forty years. I've born in a great country with great parents, 619 00:41:31,120 --> 00:41:33,320 Speaker 1: and so I had lots of I had a running start, 620 00:41:33,400 --> 00:41:35,480 Speaker 1: as most of us who were born in Australia did 621 00:41:35,560 --> 00:41:41,320 Speaker 1: not all. But it's for me a lifetime of doing 622 00:41:41,360 --> 00:41:45,759 Speaker 1: new things and to stepping into unfamiliar territory, to exposing 623 00:41:45,800 --> 00:41:51,279 Speaker 1: myself to new things, hard things, difficult, unfamiliar things. For me, 624 00:41:51,440 --> 00:41:59,040 Speaker 1: that's what's kept me unstuck, opening businesses, building, helping build 625 00:41:59,040 --> 00:42:04,040 Speaker 1: an industry, person training, writing the first course, writing books, 626 00:42:04,080 --> 00:42:07,680 Speaker 1: getting books published and distributed, working on the radio, working 627 00:42:07,719 --> 00:42:11,080 Speaker 1: in television, going back to or start doing my first 628 00:42:11,160 --> 00:42:13,560 Speaker 1: degree at thirty six years of age, going back at 629 00:42:13,640 --> 00:42:20,520 Speaker 1: fifty six. You know, for another crack, just this capacity 630 00:42:20,600 --> 00:42:24,560 Speaker 1: that we all have to just keep doing new things, 631 00:42:24,600 --> 00:42:28,680 Speaker 1: having new experiences, that we might keep growing and learning 632 00:42:28,719 --> 00:42:33,400 Speaker 1: and evolving. Number ten is a bit deep and philosophical, 633 00:42:33,440 --> 00:42:35,600 Speaker 1: but that's me tap into you. Number ten is tap 634 00:42:35,640 --> 00:42:40,759 Speaker 1: into your internal sat Nab. And if you know me, 635 00:42:40,840 --> 00:42:43,759 Speaker 1: you've heard this term many times. Your internal sat Nab 636 00:42:43,800 --> 00:42:47,160 Speaker 1: is that kind of knowing, that wisdom that insight, that 637 00:42:49,400 --> 00:42:54,960 Speaker 1: intelligence that comes from I don't know where. Maybe it's instinct, 638 00:42:55,000 --> 00:42:57,719 Speaker 1: maybe it's intuition, maybe it's divine. I don't know what 639 00:42:57,800 --> 00:42:59,759 Speaker 1: it is. I really do not know what it is. 640 00:42:59,800 --> 00:43:03,200 Speaker 1: But I do know that I have that you have. 641 00:43:03,360 --> 00:43:08,600 Speaker 1: That we all have a knowledge, a knowing, and an 642 00:43:08,719 --> 00:43:14,200 Speaker 1: understanding and a level of wisdom and insight that is innate. 643 00:43:15,840 --> 00:43:18,279 Speaker 1: I'm not talking about things that we got taught or 644 00:43:18,320 --> 00:43:21,040 Speaker 1: things that we got told, or I'm not talking about 645 00:43:21,120 --> 00:43:25,480 Speaker 1: acquired knowledge. I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about 646 00:43:26,560 --> 00:43:29,240 Speaker 1: in the middle of the bullshit, there's always this still 647 00:43:29,680 --> 00:43:34,719 Speaker 1: quiet voice. There's always this deep seated knowing of what 648 00:43:34,760 --> 00:43:38,319 Speaker 1: we should do and shouldn't do. And sometimes we just 649 00:43:38,400 --> 00:43:40,960 Speaker 1: drowned that out with noise and with chaos and with 650 00:43:41,080 --> 00:43:45,280 Speaker 1: busyness and booze and drugs and lack of focus and attention. 651 00:43:45,440 --> 00:43:47,480 Speaker 1: But when we can be still, where we can hit 652 00:43:47,520 --> 00:43:50,960 Speaker 1: the pause button, when we can find some space and 653 00:43:51,000 --> 00:43:57,319 Speaker 1: some time and some quiet, then we can realize and 654 00:43:57,440 --> 00:44:01,799 Speaker 1: come to see and understand things that we don't when 655 00:44:01,800 --> 00:44:04,000 Speaker 1: we're in our head, when we're trapped in our head, 656 00:44:04,000 --> 00:44:06,600 Speaker 1: when we're trapped in the momentum and the chaos of life. 657 00:44:08,520 --> 00:44:12,680 Speaker 1: And this requires again discipline, This requires some time. This 658 00:44:12,800 --> 00:44:14,680 Speaker 1: is not something that you can do in the middle 659 00:44:14,680 --> 00:44:18,200 Speaker 1: of the bullshit. This is something that require you. Maybe 660 00:44:18,200 --> 00:44:20,320 Speaker 1: it means that five minutes, you know you have fourteen 661 00:44:20,360 --> 00:44:23,279 Speaker 1: hundred and forty minutes a day. Maybe it means five 662 00:44:23,320 --> 00:44:28,640 Speaker 1: minutes you sit somewhere and you try to switch off 663 00:44:28,640 --> 00:44:30,480 Speaker 1: and you just see what comes up for you. You 664 00:44:30,520 --> 00:44:32,560 Speaker 1: just feel what you feel, and maybe you get out 665 00:44:32,560 --> 00:44:34,640 Speaker 1: of your head and maybe you get into your heart, 666 00:44:35,360 --> 00:44:38,680 Speaker 1: maybe you see what's going on in there. Number eleven, 667 00:44:38,719 --> 00:44:41,000 Speaker 1: we've got three more to go. Number eleven is keep trying. 668 00:44:41,400 --> 00:44:43,040 Speaker 1: And that's one of those things you think, well, you 669 00:44:43,040 --> 00:44:45,040 Speaker 1: wouldn't have to say that, But the truth is people 670 00:44:45,080 --> 00:44:48,160 Speaker 1: don't keep trying. The truth is people try and then 671 00:44:48,200 --> 00:44:51,680 Speaker 1: they stop. But if they kept trying and they kept 672 00:44:51,680 --> 00:44:55,320 Speaker 1: trying and they improvised and adapted, you know, and overcame 673 00:44:55,400 --> 00:44:58,959 Speaker 1: and survived and just figured it out and fell down 674 00:44:59,000 --> 00:45:01,160 Speaker 1: and got up and fell down and got up and 675 00:45:01,719 --> 00:45:04,759 Speaker 1: you know, fucked up and got back up, and you know, 676 00:45:05,080 --> 00:45:08,959 Speaker 1: sometimes it just comes down to not giving up. That's 677 00:45:09,000 --> 00:45:11,719 Speaker 1: not sexy, that doesn't require three HDS. You didn't need 678 00:45:11,760 --> 00:45:15,080 Speaker 1: to pay for that but some people just don't give up, 679 00:45:15,080 --> 00:45:18,279 Speaker 1: and they're not, you know, and they outperformed people with 680 00:45:18,320 --> 00:45:21,239 Speaker 1: more talent and skill and a higher IQ and better genetics. 681 00:45:22,320 --> 00:45:25,400 Speaker 1: And I think part of the reason I've done okay 682 00:45:26,680 --> 00:45:30,080 Speaker 1: is that, like and for me, I've said this before, 683 00:45:30,239 --> 00:45:34,560 Speaker 1: because I wasn't the naturally gifted, talented, genetically blessed kid, 684 00:45:35,719 --> 00:45:37,960 Speaker 1: I always had to work harder for everything. I had 685 00:45:37,960 --> 00:45:39,960 Speaker 1: to work harder to get in shape, and harder to 686 00:45:39,960 --> 00:45:43,279 Speaker 1: make sporting teams, and harder to get academic results, and 687 00:45:43,360 --> 00:45:47,120 Speaker 1: harder to even fit in socially because I wasn't the 688 00:45:47,239 --> 00:45:51,279 Speaker 1: naturally charming, charismatic, gifted kid. I wasn't that, And so 689 00:45:51,440 --> 00:45:57,320 Speaker 1: my my mediocrity in some ways for me was a gift, 690 00:45:57,520 --> 00:46:00,640 Speaker 1: and it was a gift that turned into resilience. It 691 00:46:00,719 --> 00:46:04,000 Speaker 1: was the gift that turned into the capacity that I 692 00:46:04,080 --> 00:46:06,239 Speaker 1: have to keep going to not give up, to be 693 00:46:06,320 --> 00:46:09,720 Speaker 1: able to deal with what many people would call failures. 694 00:46:10,000 --> 00:46:13,680 Speaker 1: I will generally call them insight into you know, what's 695 00:46:13,760 --> 00:46:19,120 Speaker 1: working and what's not. Fall down, Get up, all down, 696 00:46:19,160 --> 00:46:25,880 Speaker 1: six times, get up seven. Number twelve. This is an 697 00:46:25,960 --> 00:46:28,920 Speaker 1: interesting one. Actually, Now I'm going to do that one 698 00:46:29,000 --> 00:46:31,840 Speaker 1: last number, so we'll call this one number twelve. You 699 00:46:31,840 --> 00:46:33,440 Speaker 1: don't know what I'm talking about, but I just switched 700 00:46:33,440 --> 00:46:35,279 Speaker 1: my own list around. Number twelve is build a new 701 00:46:35,320 --> 00:46:39,920 Speaker 1: relationship with this comfort. I talk about this too much, probably, 702 00:46:40,880 --> 00:46:42,680 Speaker 1: but I'm saying this for those of you who are 703 00:46:42,719 --> 00:46:45,120 Speaker 1: relatively new and haven't heard much of me. I'm going 704 00:46:45,200 --> 00:46:48,160 Speaker 1: to tell you that our capacity to be able to 705 00:46:48,200 --> 00:46:50,480 Speaker 1: deal with discomfort and do things that we don't want 706 00:46:50,520 --> 00:46:52,400 Speaker 1: to do and things that are not fun, quick, easy, 707 00:46:52,480 --> 00:46:56,320 Speaker 1: or painless, that is a superpower. That is a personal 708 00:46:56,360 --> 00:47:01,399 Speaker 1: development superpower because when we can and when we can 709 00:47:01,920 --> 00:47:06,640 Speaker 1: lean into the discomfort, when we can when we can 710 00:47:06,719 --> 00:47:10,600 Speaker 1: embrace the hard thing, when we can choose to physically, mentally, 711 00:47:10,640 --> 00:47:14,680 Speaker 1: emotionally work against resistance. Just like we go to the gym, 712 00:47:14,760 --> 00:47:20,200 Speaker 1: we work against resistance. The byproduct is strength. The byproduct 713 00:47:20,280 --> 00:47:23,239 Speaker 1: is we build resilience and capacity and insight. We do 714 00:47:23,320 --> 00:47:27,480 Speaker 1: a hard thing and we develop. And when we are 715 00:47:27,520 --> 00:47:31,200 Speaker 1: prepared to change our relationship with discomfort, that is, we 716 00:47:31,280 --> 00:47:35,319 Speaker 1: are prepared to lean into the pain in an intelligent, strategic, 717 00:47:35,440 --> 00:47:39,080 Speaker 1: not a reckless or silly way, but prepared to embrace 718 00:47:39,280 --> 00:47:44,719 Speaker 1: pain on a daily basis sometimes or embrace discomfort, then 719 00:47:45,160 --> 00:47:48,759 Speaker 1: we accelerate our growth, we accelerate our learning, we accelerate 720 00:47:48,800 --> 00:47:51,640 Speaker 1: our resilience. Every day in my life, I do things 721 00:47:51,680 --> 00:47:54,360 Speaker 1: that I don't want to do, things that are uncomfortable, 722 00:47:54,400 --> 00:47:56,080 Speaker 1: but things that I need to do to live my 723 00:47:56,120 --> 00:47:59,520 Speaker 1: best life. Every day, every day I do things that 724 00:47:59,560 --> 00:48:02,480 Speaker 1: if it was just up to my comfort level or 725 00:48:02,520 --> 00:48:05,080 Speaker 1: what I would like to do, or what is fun 726 00:48:05,320 --> 00:48:08,799 Speaker 1: or what is convenient, there's shit that I would absolutely 727 00:48:09,000 --> 00:48:14,000 Speaker 1: not do. But because of my commitment to being the 728 00:48:14,040 --> 00:48:17,320 Speaker 1: best version of me, I do that stuff on autopilot. 729 00:48:17,600 --> 00:48:20,760 Speaker 1: I don't overthink it because I realized that's the commitment. 730 00:48:20,800 --> 00:48:24,400 Speaker 1: That's the price that I need to invest every day. 731 00:48:25,280 --> 00:48:28,080 Speaker 1: That's the emotional, physical, mental investment that I need to 732 00:48:28,120 --> 00:48:30,520 Speaker 1: make every day to create the outcomes I want to create. 733 00:48:31,960 --> 00:48:37,440 Speaker 1: And the last one, Number thirteen is is is deep. 734 00:48:37,840 --> 00:48:41,200 Speaker 1: Number thirteen is don't ask me why thirteen. I've just 735 00:48:41,239 --> 00:48:46,880 Speaker 1: come up with thirteen points. Number thirteen is considing or mortality. 736 00:48:47,480 --> 00:48:50,600 Speaker 1: One of the things I think about is where I 737 00:48:50,640 --> 00:48:54,600 Speaker 1: am now, Not in a morbid way or a dark way, 738 00:48:54,640 --> 00:49:00,880 Speaker 1: but where I am now in the totality of Craig 739 00:49:00,920 --> 00:49:05,040 Speaker 1: Harper's life. I think about nine Aeen sixty three, and 740 00:49:05,120 --> 00:49:09,400 Speaker 1: I think about twenty twenty three, So nineteen sixty three September. 741 00:49:09,440 --> 00:49:13,120 Speaker 1: I was born September twenty eight, So next month, September 742 00:49:13,160 --> 00:49:17,719 Speaker 1: twenty eight, I'll be sixty and I go, wow, if 743 00:49:17,719 --> 00:49:22,680 Speaker 1: I'm a typical Australian male, whatever that is, but I'm 744 00:49:22,800 --> 00:49:27,799 Speaker 1: going to live if I'm typical to around eighty. Might 745 00:49:27,800 --> 00:49:29,959 Speaker 1: be eighty one or eighty two, but let's just round 746 00:49:29,960 --> 00:49:31,920 Speaker 1: it out to eighty. So if you go, well, Craig, 747 00:49:31,960 --> 00:49:37,040 Speaker 1: if you're typical, your three quarters done. If I'm typical, 748 00:49:38,320 --> 00:49:40,000 Speaker 1: let's hope I'm not. Let's hope I have a few 749 00:49:40,000 --> 00:49:43,080 Speaker 1: more years than that. But if I'm typical, I have 750 00:49:43,160 --> 00:49:45,200 Speaker 1: about twenty years to live. Now. I know that you 751 00:49:45,280 --> 00:49:49,359 Speaker 1: might go, oh, that's fucking sad or dark or also real. 752 00:49:50,000 --> 00:49:54,880 Speaker 1: Also potentially that's my reality. Potentially, like I said, hopefully 753 00:49:54,880 --> 00:49:59,040 Speaker 1: I can live longer and better, but who knows. And 754 00:49:59,080 --> 00:50:02,920 Speaker 1: so I think sometime times it's good to, albeit somewhat 755 00:50:03,040 --> 00:50:07,759 Speaker 1: uncomfortable and scary, to think about where am I on 756 00:50:07,800 --> 00:50:12,120 Speaker 1: my journey, on my human journey. How much longer on 757 00:50:12,200 --> 00:50:16,479 Speaker 1: my human journey am I going to wait? How much 758 00:50:16,560 --> 00:50:21,640 Speaker 1: longer am I going to feed? Myself bullshit, either cognitively, 759 00:50:21,719 --> 00:50:26,880 Speaker 1: emotionally or literally eating shit crap food. How much longer 760 00:50:26,920 --> 00:50:30,000 Speaker 1: am I going to waste my time, my talent, my potential. 761 00:50:31,320 --> 00:50:33,319 Speaker 1: Am I going to do it till I'm seventy? Am 762 00:50:33,360 --> 00:50:36,680 Speaker 1: I going to do it till I just dropped dead? 763 00:50:36,719 --> 00:50:41,560 Speaker 1: One day? Like what in the context of what really 764 00:50:41,600 --> 00:50:44,239 Speaker 1: matters to me, in the context of the totality of 765 00:50:44,280 --> 00:50:47,520 Speaker 1: my life? This is my only life. I can't get 766 00:50:47,560 --> 00:50:50,799 Speaker 1: another one. I can't get another body. And so for 767 00:50:50,880 --> 00:50:55,520 Speaker 1: me who looks at the you know, just I once 768 00:50:55,600 --> 00:50:57,880 Speaker 1: drew a dot on the left hand side of my 769 00:50:57,920 --> 00:51:01,520 Speaker 1: white border dot on the right, and then I kind 770 00:51:01,520 --> 00:51:04,120 Speaker 1: of I've figured out my timeline where I was at, 771 00:51:04,120 --> 00:51:06,520 Speaker 1: and I looked at the context of the totality of 772 00:51:06,560 --> 00:51:09,239 Speaker 1: my life based on eighty years, and you know, that 773 00:51:09,680 --> 00:51:15,000 Speaker 1: line was three quarters complete. I'm like wow. And of 774 00:51:15,040 --> 00:51:17,080 Speaker 1: course there are a few variables that hopefully I can 775 00:51:17,120 --> 00:51:20,920 Speaker 1: influence and control about doing the next twenty years or longer, 776 00:51:20,920 --> 00:51:27,080 Speaker 1: perhaps better. But this is great sometimes as uncomfortable as 777 00:51:27,080 --> 00:51:28,839 Speaker 1: it might be, but it is great to step back 778 00:51:28,880 --> 00:51:33,880 Speaker 1: and go fuck my life, my life? What am I doing? Like, 779 00:51:34,160 --> 00:51:37,120 Speaker 1: where am I at? What's going on? With my job 780 00:51:37,200 --> 00:51:39,640 Speaker 1: and me and my relationships and my body and my staff, 781 00:51:39,680 --> 00:51:43,040 Speaker 1: and my happiness and my purpose and my reason and 782 00:51:43,560 --> 00:51:46,680 Speaker 1: my spiritual life and my religion, nor whatever it is 783 00:51:46,719 --> 00:51:51,880 Speaker 1: that matters to you. Like one day, you and I 784 00:51:52,120 --> 00:51:54,719 Speaker 1: we ain't going to be here, yeah, and we need 785 00:51:54,760 --> 00:51:57,000 Speaker 1: to think about well, we don't need to do anything. 786 00:51:57,040 --> 00:52:00,680 Speaker 1: But I'm keen on figuring out, Okay, what am I 787 00:52:00,719 --> 00:52:02,759 Speaker 1: going to do? Be? Create? Change? What am I going 788 00:52:02,800 --> 00:52:04,600 Speaker 1: to do in the next twenty or thirty years. And 789 00:52:04,640 --> 00:52:07,600 Speaker 1: it's not all about ticking boxes and achieving, And it's 790 00:52:07,640 --> 00:52:09,560 Speaker 1: not all about that. I also want to have fun. 791 00:52:09,600 --> 00:52:12,719 Speaker 1: I also want to laugh. I also want joy. I 792 00:52:12,760 --> 00:52:15,920 Speaker 1: also want to watch Netflix and ride motorbikes and fucking 793 00:52:16,000 --> 00:52:19,239 Speaker 1: hang out with friends. But at the same time, I 794 00:52:19,280 --> 00:52:22,719 Speaker 1: want to be the best version of me. I want 795 00:52:22,840 --> 00:52:26,080 Speaker 1: to live as long as I can optimally. I want 796 00:52:26,080 --> 00:52:27,400 Speaker 1: to eat great food. I want to live in a 797 00:52:27,400 --> 00:52:29,439 Speaker 1: great body. I want to I want to have a great, 798 00:52:29,560 --> 00:52:32,720 Speaker 1: healthy mind. I want a healthy brain. I want healthy relationships. 799 00:52:32,719 --> 00:52:35,720 Speaker 1: I want to do shit that's rewarding, fulfilling and fun. 800 00:52:37,000 --> 00:52:40,600 Speaker 1: I don't want to let father time or mother nature 801 00:52:42,239 --> 00:52:45,799 Speaker 1: take a hold. There are things that I can do 802 00:52:45,880 --> 00:52:49,040 Speaker 1: to self regulate and self manage, which means I can 803 00:52:49,120 --> 00:52:53,640 Speaker 1: live longer for better if I do certain things well. 804 00:52:53,920 --> 00:52:56,480 Speaker 1: I feel like that was worth sharing. I'm not sure 805 00:52:56,480 --> 00:52:59,239 Speaker 1: if it was worth listening to. I enjoyed sharing it 806 00:52:59,280 --> 00:53:04,000 Speaker 1: with you. I love your collective gutses. Are enjoy a 807 00:53:04,080 --> 00:53:04,919 Speaker 1: day over and out.